Dumb Blonde - Season 7: Best Of

Episode Date: July 16, 2024

What a wild ride this season has been! Bunnie's handpicked the juiciest moments for us to relive all the insanity, laughter, and group therapy sessions. From Bailee Ann spilling the tea to Bam Margera's crazy antics, near-death experiences on planes, online drama, Tyler Henry's insights and Dita Von Teese's sultry stories, it's been a rollercoaster of emotions and entertainment. Buckle up, babies - Season 8 is just around the corner and it's gonna be even more crazy!Watch Full Episodes & More:www.dumbblondeunrated.comSummarySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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additional taxes fees and restrictions apply see mint mobile for details hey guys i need to ask you a question i want to know why in the hell are you not on patreon i don't think you guys even realize how much content we have on Patreon. Let me break it down for you. We have the Bunny XO Show. We have Meet the D-Fords. We have propaganda. We have more shows that we're adding.

And not to mention, we have the visuals of the podcast. Not only that, we have four tiers that caters to everybody's budget and everybody gets the podcast. There's no more excuses. Head over to www.patreon.com backslash dumb blonde podcast and sign up. Stop missing out. We have built a huge community over there, guys. I'm talking about hundreds of thousands of people over there. We even have live chats, live chats that I actually am talking in every single night. Last but not least, we give away gifts every freaking month. I'm talking like signed stuff from Jay and I, lives. You just never know what kind of surprise you're going to get.

It's like a Cracker Jack box. I love the community that we've built over there at Patreon. If you are already a Patreon member, I freaking love you, dude. Thank you so much. You guys are my babies for life my writers if i could i would literally make out with each and every one of you i love you guys so much and that's a lot of kisses actually gotta go back is this thing on bonnie who used to be a former sex worker and now hosts the podcast dumb blonde most little girls grow up wanting to be doctors and

lawyers and shit and i was like i want to be super hot make a lot of fucking money and be a rock star's wife that was my goal as a child and here we are one two three what's up you sexy motherfuckers welcome to another episode of dumb blonde I literally just lost it I started crying on the phone I was so mad there were so many fucking emotions and you know of course the first thing I want to do is be like what the fuck is wrong with you I can continue being the shitty human I am doing all the things I'm doing and doing drugs and lying and hurting people and hurting myself i was sitting alone with the person who tried to kill me and that's like a really like dark paradox to be stuck in until you can finally like get out of it so it's like it was just it was just me yeah and i was like what the fuck like i don't

know what i'm sitting in the room that i tried to kill myself in with just the person who tried to kill me yeah like i have to like i was just ready finally hit the fork in the road so that night i sent bailey to her room and she took a bunch of pills that i did not know she had the next day she came down and she's like mom i gotta tell gotta tell you something. And I was like, what's up? And she's like, I tried to kill myself. I said, say that again. She said, I tried to kill myself. And I said, well, how did you do it?

She took, you know, the pills and I just looked at her and I said, Bailey, we have to treat this as a cry for help. But it just crushed me because I was just like, she was just upstairs. Like, what if she had really gone through with it? You know, like. Like, what if I took that bottle of pills

and didn't throw up? This is a 911 help and we need to do something and it was the hardest decision i think jay and i have ever had to make together as a couple my parents had put me in a mental hospital when i was a teenager when i was 14 and i know what happened to me in that mental hospital and i just know that bailey's issues run deeper than a medication and being in a fucking straight jacket this is trauma this is hurt this is pain she needs somewhere to go that she no nothing can get to her nothing can bother her this is not something that you throw a pill at this is something that this is you need to rip the band-aid open and you've got to really start healing and i'm 14 this is my mother who i

really trust and who i've built a really good relationship with at this point. Her mom actually provided her with the weed. A lot. Yeah. Also had you doing what else? Had me drinking a lot at this point. So yeah, we start drinking together.

Everything's. And I'm like, okay, like this isn't whatever. You're just cool mom. You let me drink. You let me smoke weed. Like this is cool. It was 4th of July. We had left my mimi's for

her big fourth july thing that she does every year he's like hey we're gonna make a stop we gotta stop felicia what are we doing and i was so drunk the kind of drunk where i just don't even like i can't even feel what's around me so i'm just like okay whatever let's just stop somewhere she's like yeah we're stopping by my dealer and i was like that's a bomb to drop what we're stopping by your dealer what do you mean your fucking dealer that's when she told me she's like yeah i've been doing cocaine again but it's recreational what the fuck and i remember freaking out and then she like talked me down and she's like it's okay like and i'm like okay whatever mom it was getting really bad to like where your mom wasn't able to like take you to school god the house was horrendous yeah it was like nightmares like i still

to this day it was bad i remember the first time your daddy took me there that you had to have been like what seven years old about seven yeah your daddy took me there and my first memory of bailey is her cooking dinner for her cousins little two cousins so i was literally raising like literally raising these two children so you gotta imagine bailey is you know six seven years old and she's momming these two younger cousins and this house was completely trashed bailey had no bed she was sleeping in a chair the neglect in the house was just horrific it was really bad honestly outrageous yeah like no kids deserve to to go with what through what they went

through having two addicts you know as parents so yeah that's how bad their addiction was getting and that's what i'm trying to paint the picture it wasn't like they were just popping a pill here and there like it was like it was yeah god it was terrible how are phil and april doing how's your relationship with them i just realized that right now it's just a good time to just back off. And they were a part of the whole treatment thing. Like I got a guardian just like Britney Spears. And her only answer to everything was lock me up and throw away the key. Put him in treatment.

Put him in treatment. And I knew that that was not the way. You feel like April and Phil had something to do with it. Was it a conservatorship that you had? They all teamed up on me and said that he needs to go away for a long, long time. It's got to be so hurtful that the people that are supposed to love you the most seem to be so against you. You know, what hurts the most is that my Aunt Missy, my mom, they were all in on it, hiding in a hotel. And then all of a sudden the police show up.

I'm like, are you in on this? My mom's like, bam, I have no idea. I have no idea about it. Then as soon as I get handcuffed and taken away, she's talking to the cops like they fucking arranged this. That betrayal has got to be fucking traumatic. For a whole year, she's like, Bam, I swear I had no idea about it. And then a year later, BJ got the body cam footage.

I'm like, what do you have to say about this? Well, Bam, we didn't know what to do. It's like, but you lied to me for a whole year. Were you using a lot then? No, because I was in treatment for two years. But as soon as I would get out, the first thing I wanted to do was that because I had no reason to stop. I'm going to say it because this is the honesty day today. Whatever issue you have, your family is supposed to be the ones that you can count on and your friends.

Knoxville tried to do this movie called Action Point in South Africa and they had a $15 million budget. And he tried to do it without us and it was a fucking flop. They only made $2 million. So when that happens, the label says, you're not free to go. You're either going to have to pay this back or put your house up for sale or do a jackass five. Well,

if Bam's not in it, then that's already $6 million, $5 million that we don't have to pay back. So we can already say he's a liability because he's drunk out in front of a hotel room on TMZ. So you're still really angry with Knoxville. He fucking put me through hell, made me pay all this fucking treatment money. And they're filming behind my back while I'm in treatment. So they already set me up to fucking fail.

And then as soon as I do the slightest thing wrong, I'm not in the movie. So I paid a hundred grand to go to treatment only for me to fuck up. And then now I'm not in the movie. They had it all planned out. Tremaine and Knoxville, they would be in Los Angeles making all these secret deals. Then they do a fucking documentary about how Jackass got created and talking about big brother the whole time.

And at the very tail end, probably about 5%. Oh yeah. And then Ben was doing CKY in Pennsylvania, sold millions of copies. You fucking barely sold 20,000 copies. I feel like you made Jackass though, because you already had like a little mini empire with CKY before even getting

on to Jack. I knew who you were before Jackass. I have learned how to forgive and be happy. And I deleted anybody that's given me a problem, but I just want to take my anger out on one person. Knoxville, get into a ring with me, take off your boxing gloves. One, two, three, you're fucking done for. Once you get Marchman acted or baker acted it usually happens in Florida that means that you have to do 90 days in treatment and if the interventionist knows that you have good insurance they will find reasons to keep you there for eternity so because I'm like 88 days in and I'm like I get two and two more days I get out hip hip hooray then he walks in he's like you've been rocking those same shorts for like three days now.

I'm like, yeah, I'm not trying to get any pussy around here. I don't care. They're like, that's bad hygiene. You're doing another 90 days at another place. Then I'll do 88 days at another place, flick the cigarette out into a bush. They filmed it smoking like any cigarette would smoke. It was not on fire. They're like, you can lit the whole National Forest on fire.

You're doing another 90 days at another place. They just kept doing it and doing it and doing it. It's called body snatching, basically. Straight up body snatching. It's the insurance. Let's toss you through. And I realized that there's nothing that you could do to get out there. You're stuck.

Oh, yeah. Once you're in the system, it's a fucking rabbit hole. So I did everything right. Am I better now? You know, we're going to keep you here for another 90 days. For what? I've done everything you've asked. I've been here for two and a half years.

Get me the fuck out. I was in the longest florida shuffle it's a fact it's called a shuffle she's like man there's no such thing as a florida cycle you have to do a statement saying that you didn't know what you were talking about and i really went on she like forced me to do it like hey guys i know i was talking about the florida shuffle but i don't know anything about it or what i was talking about and i was not in the florida shuffle whatsoever lies like i was definitely in the Florida Shuffle whatsoever. Lies. Like I was definitely in the fucking Florida Shuffle. I was in 13 different treatment centers at 90 days a piece and one of them was 220.

It's called a shuffle. They kept me in there. The definition of the Florida Shuffle where Bam was, which his parents seem to be in denial at times, is that they will just take you and then say you and I have one. It's like hey Bam's about to get out so let's get him fucked up. Because if they let you out and you have a couple of days left, they're hoping that you relapse so they could keep you for another 90 days for insurance purposes. Say, hey, you know, Haley's over on 10th Street in Delray.

Go get her. And then you would keep her for 30 days and we would split the $100,000. And that's how it goes. And that's what he was. It's just a constant shuffle. I saw this psychic lady who basically told me to be a yes man, say yes to everything. Don't tell Bam that. I pull in with the Bentley to this gas station in Vista, California, because my phone died

and I didn't know how to get to his house. So I had to charge it in the gas station. So as soon as I pull up these M13 gangsters with their tattoos, face and everything, they go, yo, you Bam from Jackass? I'm like, yeah. They're like, can we get a photo? I'm like, yes. And they're like, can we sit in your car and get a photo?

I'm like, yes. They're like, yo, man, this thing must be fast. Can we go around the block and whatever? I'm like yeah they're like can we get a photo i'm like yes and they're like can we sit in your car and get a photo i'm like yes they're like yo man this thing must be fast can we go around the block and whatever i'm like yes so then we go around the block and we're cracking jokes and then i park this i park at the gas station knowing that my phone's still charging and i'm hang on guys i leave the car running i'm like i gotta go get my phone they're like all right cool so i go in i'm like hey ma'am can i get my phone they're like she's like i gave it to your friend i'm like what friend i'm from pennsylvania I get my phone? Like, she's like, I gave it to your friend. I'm like, what friend? I'm from Pennsylvania. I don't have any friends here. She's like, well, I gave it to somebody, but you gave my phone away.

I was forced to call 911. So three cop cars pull up and I guess they were all larried up on whatever, but they thought it was for them. So they took my car as the police show up, not knowing that it's for me and my phone. It had nothing to do with them. This guy just got out of jail for five years for guns and drugs, and apparently he had guns and drugs on him. So he took my car.

I walk out. There's three helicopters in the sky, and I hear from Officer Bentley. I'll never forget. Bentley's been crashed in the house. I'm like, awesome. And I didn't want to press charges because I don't need these guys after me. So ate the cash on that as well. Why do you think this shit happens to you all the time, Bam?

Because I listened to a lady say yes to everything that day. There has to be some level of discernment in your gut, though. You got to be like, no, maybe I shouldn't be riding around with these guys. It was just like she just said it. So the first thing that just say yes to everything. Yo, Bam, can we get a photo? Yes. Was she a stripper psychic?

No, she was a psychic. And then the stripper was next and then a buddy was the psychic in the strip club he had a tiny bit no it was not okay totally unrelated so you and ryan dunn's relationship let's focus on that for a little bit you guys were like best of friends yeah he was just such a character he would be the guy to do the gnarly thing that everybody would back out on to get in that wheelbarrow and get pushed off of that three-story building into this pricker bush just give me a shot of crown royal and let's get it done and over with so and we did everything together find out that he got in a car accident it was very devastating because i never had anybody die that i was close to and i never knew what it felt like i remember we were in outside of phoenix

arizona i was doing an appearance the next day all of a sudden i just punch out the van window and break it for no reason and the tour manager was like why did you do i'm like i don't know i'm just mad and i don't know why i just don't know why turns out he wrecked at 12 28 in pennsylvania and i smashed the window at fucking 9 28 in phoenix so it's like we had such a connection that I knew something bad happened and I didn't know what till I found out the next morning. It was like he was like a soulmate. Like he wanted you to know. Yeah. Soulmates can be your friends too. Do you feel like after Ryan's death is kind of when you started spiraling? Hell yeah. Because I was so lost. Instead of like drinking as a celebration, it was just drinking to forget how did you guys meet in the

bottle yeah there's more to that i gotta hear now i gotta hear the spend the bottle story we met but we didn't know each other like we knew of each other but it was because of a person he was basically friends with the person that i dated i took his bitch oh my god mr still your girl i told him let's fade like i'm down to fade for her, so. What the hell? My friend Susan, like, I started going out with her, like, going and sleeping over at her house more. And so she hung out with his group, like, of friends. I had basically, like, started liking his pictures,

and he started, like, we just started, like, liking each other's pictures. We started commenting, like, on each other's things. Then my friend Susan, I was going to go hang out at her house, and she she was like oh garrick said he wants to hang out i was like i'm down so then i went and i stayed with susan we got drunk and then got bored and like i didn't want to make a first move because like there was a bunch of people we got bored i don't want to tell her like let's just go to the room basically i had told him i was like there's a game that me and susan play it's in the bottle and i was like all of us like let's play it you know. It actually landed on me and her. I look over and he's on the bed ready. I swear to God he was like on the bed. And everyone is just

staring. He slowly creeped up to the bed like he knew. He was just like on the bed. This is his time to shine baby. He was waiting for this moment. Like I looked over I was like where and then I just look over he's literally on the bed. Listen, this is his time to shine, baby. He was waiting for this moment. Like I looked over, I was like, where? And then I just look over and he's literally on the bed. You know what you wanted? So did you guys end up kissing? Did you crawl on top of him and kiss him? Yeah. I was like the ballsy one.

I like walked over there and I was like, oh, this is what you guys want to see? I was like, well, you're going to get a show. So after that night that you guys hooked up, you guys just decided to be together from there? No. It was kind of like a hookup that night. And then we kind were just like we're never gonna see each other again no we we probably were we were gonna be like fuck buddies you know yeah but like i didn't i didn't did g put it down yeah i gave him the works i knew like i had to like attaboy yeah and i was i was in my football i actually i actually could not i susan even this too. I actually couldn't walk.

Like I couldn't sit. Goodness gracious. I couldn't sit. It hurt. It hurt so bad. Yeah, it hurt so bad. We never talk about this, but literally I like. No, I love it. It's great.

I literally, I remember me and my friend, like I literally, I went to sit down on her like on her table. Yeah. And I just sat down. I was like. No. Did you know you'd put it down like that oh yeah i told the boys i was like yes of course because he was knocked out after oh so i put him to sleep when was the last time you needed to go to a doctor but you pushed it off made the excuse of i'm too busy it'll heal on its own i don't need help i think we've all been there booking a doctor appointment can just feel so daunting.

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the spine disease so i try to wear try to my dad's always time he's gonna yell at me put your shoulders back so like my boobs are so heavy they pull my spine forward when i had my boobs done that was the same way the implants were so heavy you still have big boobs these are my real ones i had my you're like a d still yeah i had my implants taken out but yeah that's exactly i would hunch over too and i still do that now because i'm so used to having those i had those fucking kazongas for like 13 years so you got a nice rack i'm a fucking 34 triple d they're nice i'm gonna show you when we're done i can't wait they're crazy i can't wait hurt i've thought about a breast reduction but my husband's like don't you dare you're gonna have that crazy scar and like they're so pretty not if you go to a microsurgeon really they'll be able to do it like super super thin really like i had one

girlfriend of mine who she they took the nipple off and yeah i took and then they put it back on it looks crazy yeah that's someone chewed on the nipples and back on like someone ate the pepperoni and then fucking put it back on i'm like it's like a kid's pizza you are so open about your mental health journey right now especially in the times that we live in is so fucking important people try to act like everything's fine all the time and i love the fact that you're like i am fucking about to get on a flight and i'm scared to death and like you're just so real about it when i was going through my suicidal ideation i remember looking at jay and i was like i don't know how i'm gonna live till 50 i don't want to be here till 50 now i'm kind of like shit i might want to hang out until I'm 80.

When I was younger, I just was really struggling. And I remember I used to want to die all the time. I'd pray to God, I don't want to wake up. I don't want to wake up. I don't want to be here anymore. I was a cutter. So I got caught at school cutting. They sent me to the hospital.

I got put in inpatient. And then from there, they ended up putting me on an antidepressant. At 16? Yeah. I've tried to get off of it completely because, you know, my life has changed. And your life does change. And that's what I think people need to remember. Maybe in a season of your life where things are horrible, you don't want to be here.

But that doesn't mean that spring isn't coming. People sit there and they think this is forever. It's not. Nothing's forever, good and bad. I'm very uncomfortable all the time almost. So like when you meet someone that you're like, okay, I can just chill. Like it's nice. tits hang out i just take my top off that's what i strive for yeah exactly it's to get you naked you're a comfort person i'm dead you have to pay more on the patreon for that yeah for sure it wouldn't be the first time we've had some titties flop out on the podcast so yeah who took their titties out jesse lawless off the top took her

fuck and she had some She's a full lesbian. Gorgeous tits. I feel like every fucking lesbian has the nicest tits. The Bunny XO Show is coming back, baby. Are you guys excited? Woo! Woo! Woo!

Woo! How'd that sound on you guys's speakers how was that for the speakers guys we almost fucking died in a plane and i did not think it was gonna make headline news international news literally we're on this plane and i already had a bad feeling about it i just when Jay told us we were leaving at seven o'clock the next night, I immediately told Mimi get us other flights because I don't for some reason just something gave me anxiety. I just had like butterflies in

my stomach. When we were driving there, we pulled up and Haley was like, Oh, look, it's a rainbow. It's beautiful. And I was like, Yeah, that's a good sign that nothing's gonna be wrong with this airplane. Never say shit like that. Because I am such a words are spells kind of person, but I just felt it. And sometimes when I have visions, if I don't talk about it, they happen. We get on this plane and the feng shui of the plane is already off. Jay said at the minute he stepped on that plane. Yeah. My husband walked in the plane and he was like, wait, what? My seat is the seat that he normally always sits in was on the opposite side just felt weird and then the staff was not that great they were not terrible snacks besides the snacks they just weren't warm and welcoming and before you're about to have your life in two people's hands you would like them to be fucking warm and welcoming and

when we take off they keep like if you've ever been on a jet you can feel when they break and we're like elevating elevating and then all of a sudden we just break and then it's like it was so weird because it got like eerily quiet and then i have my headphones on and i see boston our security run up to the pilot comes back and he looks like he's seen a ghost almost like he looked really flustered i moved my headphone thing to the pilot comes back and he looks like he's seen a ghost almost like he looked really flustered moved my headphone thing to the side to hear what he was saying i said what's going on and all i hear boston say is something's wrong with the plane we have to emergency land jay just goes well tell him sooner than later texting my family goodbye and that i love them i literally

was texting kayla and i was like my God, they have to emergency land this plane. Come to find out the computer malfunctioned. And when a computer malfunctions on a plane, the screen that they have to be able to see everything around them and fly other planes, fucking UFOs, anything fucking is completely black. So he was blindly driving the plane. What's up with fucking Billy Bob Thornton though?

King. Literally, right? Him and I literally turned and locked eyes. the plane what's up with fucking billy bob thornton though king literally right him and i literally turned and locked eyes and it was like for a moment i forgot i was married and i was like sashayed my way over to him like just a fucking little dork and i was just like such a pleasure to me oh my god icon like i was like this is amazing because he's literally the only person i wanted to meet the entire time i know you went through all the chairs and then you're like billy bob thornton i was so excited like i love all the country music singers too but i've met all of them but to see like jane seymour and billy bob thornton they're like they're fucking icons dude

meeting fucking billy bob was the highlight of my life yeah for sure i thought about him for days afterwards such an icon through my life dude he was with Angelina fucking Jolie. They were the ones who originally wore the blood. Did you smell her on him? I tried. I tried. It was a deep whiff. I whiffed his soul whenever we hugged.

I love him. I love him. He's a fucking badass. He was so sweet. He was so sweet. The fact that he takes time to... He speaks to you you know like you meet so many people and you feel like as if they're just speaking but like he really spoke

to you he's a sweetie pie oh but yeah good old fucking billy bob i love him have you ever had sleep paralysis i had an orgasm one time during sleep paralysis and i could have swore i was getting like banged by a demon you liked that what yeah i didn't mind the orgasm but it was a cemetery no it was in my bed in the middle of the day it was fucking scary and you can like hear like a growling sound it's crazy i've heard i've heard scratching next to my bed yeah i've heard growling mine i just can't breathe like i wake up too i can breathe but i can't talk but then it just puts me right back to sleep like i physically cannot get myself out of the sleep i haven't had a sleep paralysis dream in probably two years and actually maybe a long

we're all gonna go home tonight i know i hope not i'm wondering what i'm doing different that i why i don't have them anymore you're not taking vitamins like you used to. I don't want them. So you think vitamins cause sleep paralysis? Well, you were overdosing on vitamins. Yeah. And then before that was drugs. You had a chemical imbalance every single time.

You've been clear these past two years of everything. It's because I love Jesus. I think that's how it happens too, is when you don't plan something, it just organically grows. It's almost like the universe grabs it and just rolls with it. Don't get me started on manifesting things. Because I really believe that. I really think like a lot of people will ask me like, what does it take to get where you are?

And I'm like, well, first of all, stop thinking of where you want to go and start enjoying where you are. Because if you can't appreciate the now and what's happening right now, forget it. Like, and when people ask me, like, what my goal is right now, I'm like, I don't have a goal. I never had a goal. I just was like, quietly delighted at all the little milestones and enjoying that moment and working with integrity and gratitude. And like that's the key. Like I don't think if you're always looking for the next best thing or like the thing that's going to make you. I don't think it works like that.

That's so real. And I think a lot of people, including myself, need to hear something like that. Because I'm always like on to the next goal. And sometimes I forget that this is a journey, not a destination so yeah that was very beautifully said what does it take to make Dita Von Teese happy in a relationship well I'm a bit of a size queen yeah I love that admittedly joking aside I guess I just I love doing what I do I love working I love you know I always have so many projects I think what I I love being independent I don't you know, I always have so many projects. I think what I, I love being independent. I don't like being like, I'm somebody's woman.

I don't want to date any more famous men. Yeah. I don't know. I just love my work. To me, it's all like spread across the board. Like when I was younger, it was like, I put so much importance on romance. Right. And I just am like, okay.

Yeah. As you get older, you're just like, no, it's like, yeah. I always tell my husband, I'm like, yeah as you get older you're just like no it's like yeah I always tell my husband I'm like we've been together almost a decade I'm like if if this does not work out which it will I I could never just get into another relationship again especially with a public person and also just having to get to know somebody on that level again of intimacy and just being you you know, joined at the hip with somebody is just, it's a lot. It's a lot to have to try to work through again. I've always wanted to ask, what is it like? I don't know if this is too graphic, but what is

it like the first time you cut into a body? You know, the good thing is that you're not the first one to do it. And so you're assisting. I think it's the first time it's your patient is when it's really scary. Right. That's you know because being a resident there was always backup you know like when we did surgery and in residency you had the older surgeon basically saying like cut here i remember the first time they actually um i was operating with the surgeon i was i was a i think maybe an intern and i was doing essentially it was a hernia right and that's like one of the basic operations and i'd never started an operation before and we're standing there over the patient. And he goes, Tony, get started.

And I had never started an operation before. So I'm like, uh. And I grabbed the clamp off of the mail stand, which is the stand that the scrub techs have. And he looks at me like, you idiot. Are you going to make a cut with a clamp? I'm like, oh, no. Like, can I have a scalpel, please? I could never do it. I would probably pass out. No, because it's baby steps, you know? I mean, our training, you know,

for me, my training started when I was a medical student. You start from literally doing the tiniest little procedures. I remember the first time I did a spinal tap on a little baby. Here's this little kid, this little baby, you know, and I was so nervous as a medical student. But the attending pediatrician was just so gentle and reassuring all the way up to now where it's like, yeah, I've had people say thank you for saving my life. And, you know, I've cut people's skin open and pull it. It's like when you think about it, like how arrogant do you have to be to think that you can cut somebody open, especially in plastic surgery, where they're completely healthy and you make them unhealthy for a period of time, expecting that they're going to be healthy again. Plastic surgery is beautiful, but it's so barbaric at the same time. It can be. Oh yeah. Fascinating to know that you can cut somebody open, take stuff out, sew them up again, and then the outcome is absolutely gorgeous.

What is the wildest request you've ever had for a surgery? what is the wildest request you've ever had for a surgery oh you know i can tell you a wild story oh i'm ready okay i mean i get wild requests but this was like a wild story i had a patient who came in to see me this was i literally was in practice for four months so i'm this new plastic surgeon in michigan i i thought i was kind of like i in my head i was trying to present myself like as a beverly hills big shot because I trained out in Beverly Hills. And now I'm in like Rochester Hills, Michigan, this small town. And, you know, at the same time, inside, I knew like I'm brand new. I'm green.

Like I've not treated people by myself before. And I was nervous. But on the surface, it's like, oh, yeah, sure. You know, I'm a real plastic surgeon. I trained in Beverly Hills. So this woman comes in and she had had a facelift and a brow lift done by a different plastic surgeon. I trained in Beverly Hills. So this woman comes in and she had had a facelift and a brow lift done by a different plastic surgeon, a guy who was really not thought of well in my community as kind of a chop shop type guy. And so she had some areas where a little bit of loose skin here, her brows had dropped again and stuff. And she's like, can you fix me or can

you make things better? So I'm like, and she goes, I used to be a model. And she was now in her late 50s. She goes, I used to be a model. And now I'm just feeling like I've lost it and can you please help me and I felt Bad for her So I said, you know what? Let me give you a discount and let's do this operation and it was a brow lift and a facelift and I brought her to Surgery and the surgery went perfectly So she comes back to see me at one week and she was happy at one week and then at three weeks She was happy and then all of a then at three weeks, she was happy.

And then all of a sudden, I get a call from her a couple weeks later saying that I botched her and that she is going to go see some other surgeons to see what can be done to fix it. So now, like, I'm literally four months in practice. I'd never had an unhappy patient before. I didn't know what to do with it. And so I call her up, and I say, hey, what's going on? She goes, you botched me. I'm trying to find somebody to fix this. And so I said, well, please just come back to the office. Let's take a peek at it. Because last time I saw her, she looked great. Like healing was fine.

So I said, just come back to the office and let's just take a peek and see what's going on. You know, let's see what I can do to help you. So she comes into the office. She comes barging into, I scheduled her at the end of the day because I'm thinking like, I think she's mad and I don't want her to scare other patients away. So you always schedule them at the end of the day so that they don't like, you know, ruin the rest of your day and scare everybody away. So she comes in, she barges in the door and she is pissed off. Her face is bright red and she starts screaming at me. And she's like, you botched me. You botched me.

You made me look Oriental. And I'm like, Oriental? She goes, you made me look like you. And I'm like, what? And like, she's Caucasian, you know? I'm like, no, she doesn't look Asian. And so I go, well, I go, let's settle down. She goes, I saw this other doctor, and he told me that I'm a train wreck now, that you

completely botched me. And I'm like, I'm actually really good friends with this doctor doctor there's no way he would ever say that and i don't tell you this but i go well i go what can i do to try to make it up for you like let's you know let's let's see what we can do together and she goes you better pay me a half a million dollars or i'm gonna run you out of town and i go how i don't have like i was literally two hundred thousand dollars in debt right like i i she look asian no she looked fine and she was healing finally looking at her incisions everything was healing fine she had body dysmorphia what she looked at and saw in the mirror was different than what everybody else saw so i'm like i go look i don't have a half a million dollars like

i'm like i'm literally 200 grand in debt myself and that's my debt my wife had another 200 grand so we're like almost half a million the whole as it it is. And so, so I go, I don't have that money. And she goes 400, or she goes $150,000. You pay me $150,000 and I will forget that you destroyed my face. And I go, look, you actually look fine. Like, let's talk this over. And then she goes, carte blanche, carte blanche. I get whatever I want by whatever surgeon I want for the next three years and you pay for it. And I'm like, I mean, what, this isn't like a, she's literally negotiating with you. So I go, whatever surgeon I want for the next three years and you pay for it. And I'm like, this isn't like a- She's literally negotiating with you. So I go, look, I can't do that.

Then she goes, if you don't do that, then I'm going to send you back to LA where the only people who allow you to operate in them are the whores. And she starts running through my office, literally screaming, the whores, the whores, the whores. She goes up to my big window and like a horror movie she's like i'm a monster looking at the window screaming at the top of her lungs and so i'm like oh my and now i knew that she was going to be unhappy so i actually wrote her a check for what i had what she paid me and what her hospital fees were like i would it's like more than what i made like what she paid me and a

lot more because before you know when before she in, I had this feeling like this is going to go bad. And I had a release for her where if she were to sign the release, then like it releases me of indemnity of any responsibility. So I say, Look, I go, I've got a check for the cost of your operation. I go, this is money that you paid the hospital to, I go, I will give you this check. If you sign this release. And she goes, she looks at it, she goes, this is money that you paid the hospital to. I go, I will give you this check if you sign this release. And she goes, she looks at it. She goes, this is all you're offering me? And she goes, I will destroy you.

I've got good friends in town, and we're going to send you back to where you came from. And she leaves and slams the door and leaves. My employees are like hiding under their desks, and they're like, oh, my gosh. So I call up my old mentor in LA who he has seen freaking everything. I remember he told me back in the day, he said, I had a patient of mine. He goes, yeah, I had a patient of mine who was stalking me, would actually be in bushes in front of my house and looking through my windows. And so I'm like, well, he had this person, like that person was nuts. So maybe he knows what to do. So I call him up and I say, hey, doc, I'm like, this woman, she's like going crazy.

I think she's going to like, she's threatened. She actually threatened to hit me with her car at one point. And she's going to like, I think she's going to attack me. And I go, what did you do to get rid of that patient? And he goes, oh, simple. I hired some guys to beat her up. And I'm like, I don't, I'm not going to hire people. And I don't even know who to hire to call anyway. Like not that I would hire somebody to beat up a patient of mine so I'm like okay thanks for nothing and he's like tell me what happens this is exciting and I hang up on him so so I'm standing there I'm like what do I do and like my employees like their eyes are huge like all of a sudden bang bang bang bang bang and she's at the door and my employees employees were like, she probably has a gun.

And I'm like, oh my gosh. And they're like, don't open the door. And I'm like, I kind of like a ninja. I like creep up to where the window is. And like, I look around the corner and like, I'm looking like there's no gun or anything. So I go up to the door, I open it up. She barges in, takes a check that I put on the front desk, puts it in her pocket, signs the release, walks up to me, and she goes, this is not over. And she walks out the door. And so now the next day I had an operation. It was actually a breast reconstruction on a woman who had these huge breasts, and she'd had cancer and this and that. It was going to be one of the most difficult, probably the most difficult operation I was supposed, I was going to do up to that point in my career. I could not sleep

overnight. And I called her up. It was like five in the morning. And I go, I'm really sorry. I said, I can't operate on you today. She goes, well, that's okay. And she's just so nice. She goes, we'll do this later. And I go, no, I go, I don't think I can operate on you. And for months I had like lost all sense of like confidence in myself because like, here I, what did I do to this woman? Um, so a couple of weeks go by and I'm at the hospital treating a patient and I get a call from my office and they're like, you need to come back. That patient's mom has left you a message. So I go, what is the message and then the message is you need to call me my daughter is suicidal so now i'm like i'm like fuck this now my what happened like my patient's

gonna freaking kill herself because of this freaking facelift that i did on her and like what do i do i call one of my best friends a psychiatrist and i say brian like this is what's going on like what do i do and he goes you need to tell her mom to call the police and send her to the hospital immediately. Cause you know, if she's suicidal, you've got to do that. So I'm like, okay. So I call her mom up and I'm like, Hey, this is Dr. Yoon. I'm calling, you know, you left me a message about your daughter and you said she is suicidal. Is that true? And she goes, what? Suicidal? What are you talking about? And I go, well, this is what message was left. And she goes, no, no, that's a figure of speech she needs more money to pay for what you did to her oh my gosh oh my gosh like this is an 80 year old woman 85 year old woman trying to like trying to like blackmail me for more money

oh my gosh so i'm like look i'm sorry this conversation's over and and like that was the end of it but and you never heard from them again you know I so I referred her in I referred her initially when she called before I saw her and that whole crazy episode happened and I gave her some names of some local surgeons who are much older than me who've been very established and so I ran into one of them at a meeting a couple years later and he's like hey Tony I'm like oh hey how's it going and and he's like you know that one patient I'm like oh I know you, how's it going? And he's like, you know that one patient? I'm like, oh, I know who you're talking about. And he goes, she's effing crazy.

And I'm like, yeah. She was just looking for a paycheck. I think that she saw this young, naive, nice surgeon and got a nice result. I think part of it may be BDD, like by dysmorphia. And part of it is like, I'm going to take this guy for everything he has. I had a client one time and he was an OR, an emergency room doctor. We were doing like eight balls of cocaine one night. And just, I mean, it was like a party.

And I looked at him and I remember looking at him and I was just like, this guy's energy is so weird. And I was like, why did you become a doctor? You know, like I was really curious because his energy was just so weird. He's like, you want to know why? And I was like, yeah, he said, because I love playing God. And I was like, never going to the hospital again. I can't even wrap my head around that mentality. Yeah. Like it doesn't make any sense to me that like, like, and there's so many out there that are like that. I mean, look, we're all people, you know, I am no better than anyone else. And, and I don't know if he meant that he likes being able to control people's lives,

whether they live or die like that. Scary. I think that's what he meant. That's pretty scary. What is it? Dr. Death. It's insane, dude. He's a neurosurgeon and he was like paralyzing people and causing all these problems intentionally

and was like bouncing hospital to hospital. Like one hospital didn't want to say anything because they didn't want to kind of, Oh crap, people died on our watch and didn't want to say it was bad. Oh, come on. I see. I just, I could never like that. I have too much of a conscience to ever like have somebody else's blood on my hands like that. I'm actually a huge advocate of natural bodies because once you start cutting on yourself and getting lipo and stuff like that, your weight distribution is completely different in your body. Now I get like saddlebags if I don't work out right.

People ask that a lot about lipo. Like one of the most common questions is, I heard if I have lipo that I'm going to like gain weight somewhere else. So this is what happens. We're all born with a finite amount of fat cells, which means they're determined, right? So if we suction a bunch of fat off of your tummy, theoretically that fat is never coming back. But the way that you can regain weight in your stomach is if you gain more weight, the

fat cells that are left behind can swell back into the space and you can gain weight. It's harder to lose. It can be harder to lose. The question that women are asking is, if I get my tummy lipoed, am I all of a sudden going to gain weight in my hips? It's not that you all of a sudden gain weight in your hips, it's just that you have more fat cells there and they're going to take on volume maybe before your tummy starts to show.

So you may eventually show in your stomach as well, but it might show first in another area and everyone's kind of different with where they carry their fat. So that's, that's the phenomenon that's happening. It's like, because you have lipo, it doesn't cause fat to go somewhere else. It's just that you have more fat cells in an area where you didn't have lipo. And if you're prone to gaining weight there, you might show there first and faster than you would in the place where you already had lipo. Absolutely. But also eat after you have body surgery done, you have to eat correctly. You cannot just get out of surgery and start eating fucking hot Cheetos and in and out and all that stuff. Because one, you're going to lose all the results. You just went and spent money on the fact that I had the surgery in 2015 and still have maintained these results is because I have the strictest diet ever.

That's why women get multiple surgeries and have multiple batches of lipo because they didn't adhere to diets or eating healthy. And they just figured that they could just eat whatever they want. And you can't like you really have to work at keeping weight off no matter what. I don't care what anybody says. It doesn't matter what time of year it is. I never get tired of online shopping, especially during the holidays. Here's the thing. It's kind of gross out. Even those of us that embrace the chilly weather need something to break up long winter nights. Something I love to do is treat myself to a little something, but I don't want to spend a fortune on my winter blues.

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What happened? Is this the situation that happened with the mayor? Oh, so I was sexually assaulted recently. We are dealing with someone who is habitually a rapist and like rapey vibes right opposite of consent were you raped yeah sexual assault could be being groped could be oh this was when you don't want to be or like this like you that's why i asked if you were raped so yeah i um was drugged and woke up like thinking like did someone set me up like are we both in this together? Who would do this? And then I realized it was him who did that. And I was stark naked, did not know where any of my clothes were. My necklace was broken, all that stuff. And it was just like flight.

Like, I just like ran. I just really didn't know how to behave. It's got to be tough to hold all that in and not talk about it. I do think talking about it, like you said, is probably the best thing, one, for you, therapy. And two, that's your testimony. You one, for you, therapy, and two, that's your testimony, you know, something that you've survived and that you've gone through. So maybe people are able to connect with you. Doing the best you can. And I think for a lot of other sexual assault victims, you do the best you can when you are the crime scene, straight up. Being

sexually assaulted and being like the crime scene was surreal it just felt like my brain and my body was not connected and so I had to do a lot of therapeutic work somatic experiencing work on that and I just feel you know like my heart goes out to so many other rape victims who are like going through this stuff for years it just is really tedious circling back to the the traumatic experience of losing her father, do you feel like your mom was not there for you emotionally whenever? Because it plays out on the show, you and your mom have a very tumultuous relationship where it's like very on again, off again. And I feel as a viewer that your mom almost wasn't emotionally there for you. And do you feel like that has been like a huge thing

in you and your mom's relationship even to this day yes you see like on this show that maybe my mom and I disagree about a lot of things I would say in all because I had to like really you know like 12 step inventory trauma center you actually write down it's called the fifth step anyone you have relationships with so I'm writing down my mom i'm writing down my dad and what came up maybe i didn't feel like my mom was supportive it's actually way more than just not having support was i seen she never saw how much i love someone she like she came up after hearing that he had passed away that she was happy that he was gone and i think we might have we might have our own feelings like i would with Sophia and her

boyfriends in those situations do know that like I have reasoning and capability of understanding like someone has feelings here and I need to put my stuff to the side but a lot of what came up at the 12-step trauma center when you're writing down your relationship is abandonment abandonment abandonment most people will say, well, I didn't abandon you. Like you were living at my house. I was giving you shelter. I was doing this. But abandonment might come from not being seen, not being feeling safe. I didn't feel safe in that environment. Tell me about your relationship with Nicole. How did you guys become best friends? And are you guys really best friends in real life? she needed an older sister because she's an only child and i needed a younger sister because i'm an only child our personalities are

so different that it just worked she's just so sweet and innocent and pure and tiny snooki is sweet and innocent and i look up to her even though she's literally a foot shorter than me she doesn't like confrontation where I'll take confrontation head on. She doesn't want to fight. She just wants to have a good time. And her best friend since high school and me started crying over how much we love this girl. How much we love protecting her. So I look up to her for business advice, mother advice.

She can take on any task and own it. And she's still sooky. Still wants to party and have a good time. I would be fucking exhausted in bed by 2 p.m. We're so ride or die. I don't care who's wrong, who's right. Like I'm going to be in a nursing home with her. She's fucking incredible. We need to fight less. It breaks my heart when we fight. She has the same self awareness that you did. And I'll tell her, like, we need to keep this open dialogue and conversation going because I never want you to think you can't come to me open and honest. So if you need to check mom, you can check your mother.

And I know if there's an older demo that watches you will disagree with that. That's the problem. I think so, too. I feel like that generation stifled a lot of their children's voices. Yes. Or I let Bailey come on the podcast this week. I'm getting a lot of hate for letting a 16 year old talk about her trauma, but that's what my platform is about. Yeah. So when my own child comes to me and says, mom, I want to tell my story so that I can help other kids my age, I'm supposed to do tell her no, no, you have to wait till you're 18 to speak about things that have happened to you. It's wild. Do as I say. You're not allowed to have a voice. It's a one-sided conversation. And I needed to educate myself on

how do I break down her walls, make her feel safe and loved while disciplining her. That's what a mom's supposed to do. That's the definition of a mom to me. He pretty much started in the mob at a very young age. Brooklyn and Staten Island is kind of like the breeding ground for the mafia. My father grew up, you know, intrigued with that lifestyle. My grandfather came over from Sicily and, you know, he was on the opposite side of the street. My grandfather was a legitimate guy.

The men on the other side of the street, you know, there was always respect. The way my grandfather respected them, you know, my father was always intrigued and my father said, you know, there was always respect. The way my grandfather respected them, you know, my father was always intrigued. And my father said, you know, how do you know this one particular guy that my grandfather knew back from Sicily? And he said, he's a bad guy, but he's one of our bad guys. You know, he's good to us. So that always stuck in my father's head because he's like, well, you know, what did he mean by that? But the mafia took care of their communities. They took care of their own. Cosa Nostra is this thing of ours. And what what it is is the mafia actually protected and policed their own communities. Like back in the day someone

couldn't come in a community and hurt a little kid or rape a girl you're gonna get killed. The mafia protected their own. Yeah they didn't go to the police they went to the mafia. They you know kind of migrated to New York and Sicilians they were You know, they were trying to make money. So the mafia started rackets, like where they got into the garment industries, the construction industry. It really was about their own communities and benefiting themselves. And when you become part of that lifestyle, you understand if you betray that lifestyle, death is the, you know, that's the answer. That's what happens if you betray that lifestyle. So that's what Cosa Nostra is. It's a community of men that came together to be able to provide for their families through crimes or whatever, but you're supposed to always be loyal

to that lifestyle. And if you're not, it's death is the penalty. I actually have a new found respect for your father. You know, you hear about Sammy the Bull and you hear like, oh, he's a rat. He's this, he's that. When you have the world coming against you like that, I would have probably done the same thing your dad did. Originally, my father was in jail for a year. He was going to fight the case, but it became the lawyers reached out to my father and said, John's controlling the defense. John doesn't want the lawyer to be able to have a lawyer client meeting without John being present. He wants to know everything that goes on. I just believe that he set my father up. Do you think he

was building the case with the feds? John saying, well, I lost control of Sammy the Bull. He killed this guy and took over this business. He killed this guy and took over that business. But my father is very loyal to Cosa Nostra and he didn't kill anyone unless it came orders from the boss. Gotti was pretty much turning on your dad. And your dad kept warning him and was like, hey man, this is not how it happened. Trying to separate the trial. He faced murder trials before.

My father, to do that, I couldn't understand because that's so not who he was. Would he still be in prison had he not? And it wasn't even about life. I think my father at that point was the betrayal. Because I'm indicted on murders because of you of you was hurt and he felt disrespected john's like oh i was just blowing off steam and my father's like oh blowing off steam but now i'm facing a life sentence and now you're telling me i can't defend myself that was the the crumble of the sammy the bull john

gatti relationship i mean why don't you just stay true to who you were? Like that's, why don't you just kill him? Whoever sat down with him, he'll tell you the same thing. He struggles with it. Maybe he should have killed John in jail. Like, honestly, I just felt betrayed by a brother. I just, I started thinking of the life and he was like, I was just done. I just threw in the towel and that was my way out.

Adam and I actually had one threesome with another dude in our personal life, like very early before we were like officially boyfriend and girlfriend. We always thought it was hot. hot yeah but i feel like adam didn't want to admit to himself that he thought it was hot because at the time we did that i was just some girl and then when i became like his woman it was like well is it wrong for me to actually want to do that to get off with my like primary like lover and not just some girl does he like watching you with other men i would say that he enjoys it even though maybe he doesn't always want to actually like admit it

like that like i'm like your dick got harder like i know you enjoy it like it's in my mouth i feel it yeah us women us women know our men yes i hate that everybody online is like calling him a cuck and stuff like that because it's like you guys are just literally having fun living out people's fantasies. And I feel like everybody's always trying to put people in a box. It's like everybody has to have a stereotype or some fucking sort of name. And it's just ridiculous. Adam's been fucking different girls for years now. And that's, you know, like your guys's thing.

You always wanted to sleep with other men or you just didn't know how to ask him? I wouldn't say always. Finally time. I think it was like maybe four or five years into it where I was kind of just like, like, I know that I'm leaving something on the table by not doing something with another man. Like because my fans have been asking for it for so long. They're like, hey, we love you and Adam together, but we really want to see you with someone else. And obviously there was part of me that was like curious about it sexually, but mostly from a business point of view.

I was like, hey, like I really want to do this for my OnlyFans. And it was pretty much always a no, like that is not on the table until eventually it was it was a yes. And I can't really say like what exactly made Adam change his mind, but I think he probably saw the monetary value in it. I think it like part of it is that he's always been a little open. It's more like that. The world is not open, you know,

like during that whole, we call the Jason love saga. Like he, he was not painted in a, in a nice way. And even now it's like, you know, that's not your wife. That's everyone's wife. That's how everyone sees him.

So take me to the last day of him being alive. He was found, passed away on the 5th, but we had a maid in the house. So the maid was in the house. I think Aaron told her, hey, don't talk to Melanie, because that's what he did to all this team. When he would be upset with me, he'd be like, don't talk to melanie how long was she working for him before she before he passed away i think we knew her for like two years maybe a year and a half and she was getting him a couple of jobs but a lot of jobs got canceled because of the trolls and things like that they

would call the events and say no we don't want aaron doing this celebrity event one after the other everything just hurt him he dealt with the hurt by taking pills, I think. Just going deeper into his addiction. And drinking or doing whatever. So that last day, was he still huffing also? I don't really like to see like anything from that week. It's just too hard for me. Because then I can't sleep for days when I see stuff.

I don't know how you're holding it together as well as you are. That's a lot to go through and then to lose somebody so suddenly, you know. He's on live, huffing paint. He had an appointment to go to an intake for rehab on Friday, November 5th. So in his mind, he probably thinks it's like one of his last hurrahs before he has to go to rehab. I thought about it that way. Moving forward, Aaron always fought with you online and there was a i i watched a clip of the live that he did before he passed away

and you're blowing up his phone and finally one of the last things you say to him is you are going to die yeah i just i hate thinking about a lot like why did I like I wish I knew how to handle an addict better but I mean to me I didn't take that as you trying to be hurtful I took it as you saying like you're going to die it was kind of like honestly I would have to say I didn't know how to handle it anymore and I just wanted people to know that he was like what was going on because I was scared. Right. And I wanted people to possibly help, you know, but. That's what I took it as.

I took it as you're like crying out for help. I didn't know what to do anymore. I was like I was I think I was just so tired that week and so exhausted from all the craziness that was going on. I didn't know how to handle it can you take I think my body just shut down because I and my brain when you're I didn't know what to do anymore when you're in those types of relationships they they consider the trauma that gets caused to your brain like brain damage because it it's like years of brain damage especially being I'm not calling Aaron a narcissist but being in a narcissistic relationship or toxic relationship, it causes brain damage to you

because it's that hurtful. And just the whole, you know, toxicity of the relationship takes its toll on you emotionally. And it's not good. So I have a real brothel menu in the back. Can I pull it? Can I pull it out and look at it? All right. We got the Mustang Ranch menu here, guys. Has a little intro and then it gets to the pleasure menu. Special shows, lingerie show, vibrator show, shower show, two or more girl show, drag party, sexy cinema. What's a sexy cinema? We watch a movie, but we're not really watching the movie. Oh, gotcha.

Okay. Does that involve like everything or is it just like, and is everything timed? That's something you work out with each client and we don't try to sell time. Obviously everything does have to be timed though. And then it moves on to foreplay and it says nude massage, breast massage, French teas, fire and ice, wild horse chair party. What is that? That intertwined with, it looks like a tantra chair so you can do like 120 sexual positions on this chair i love that what's the most requested the standard half and half a little sucky sucky yeah it says full pleasure right here so they got a straight lay they got a wild horse roundup a half and half and then they have a menage a trois oh and then we got specialties on the back

hold on one second in ranch orranch or off-ranch dates. So you guys are allowed to go off the ranch with the dates? Yes. And what does that entail? Like what's something like that? I just went on one recently before I left work and came here to do this. But we just went up to North Lake Tahoe because that's still on the Nevada side. So we have an escorting license for anywhere inside Nevada.

We just went up to Tahoe for the day and had lunch and did a little shopping and came back and hung out privately. And yeah, we only have a broth license in Story County. So she can go on the date, but then they have to come back to the ranch and have sex. Working at the ranch. What is like one of the funniest stories you could tell me that has happened there? Girl, this one time this man hit us all up on the email and he was like, I want eight girls. So he hit you up and he was like i want eight girls to ram me in my ass yes i'm on a two-month trip at the end of this trip this is the cherry on top and we're like you're bullshit he shows up he shows up picks eight of you and you guys all go in this room and take turns just plowing him yeah in the mustang dungeon oh shit

and i didn't have my strap on because i wasn't expecting him to come to the appointment my girl he had an extra but it was the bbc fine i'll just go last so i'm waiting waiting puffing my little vape pen in the corner you're just watching this dude getting railed yes okay puffing my vape in the corner watching tom get railed my move my big black fake cock the god and everybody has been in his ass and i think now is my moment go and i just and i don't normally do things. Like I'm like the girl next door. I do vanilla parties.

And I just go full for it. And this poor man screams bloody murder. And he's like, let me up, let me up. And he runs to the bathroom. And I'm like, oh shit. And all the girls are looking at me like, what the fuck did you do that for? What happened? You didn't use any lube.

You didn't slide it in slow. I was like, I thought it was lubed up. Damn, you just went in dry. I went in dry full force. Oh, holy shit. Was he all right? Did he ever come back? He has been emailing Madame Tara to come back.

Son of a bitch, he loved it. But I got a call from him one night. We always had this deal. He was like, if I die, you get my bird. He had an African gray parrot his whole fucking life. This was his best friend. He had a love relationship parrot his whole fucking life. This was his best friend. He had a love relationship with this bird for real. This was his soulmate, was his bird.

And he was like, when I die, she's yours, right? And so I got a voicemail on my phone one night that's like, hey, man. I could hear it in his voice. Hey, man, you know, something's came up. Ruby's yours. I'm like, what the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck?

What the fuck's going on? So I get in my car and I start driving down to Long Beach. And I'm calling him over and over and over and over and over and over and over. And he finally answers. He's like, it's already done, man. Don't even, just turn around. Just turn around. It's already done.

The deal's already done. Just turn around. I'm like, dude, I'm 20 minutes away. Just hold on. Just hold on. Just fucking hold on. Dude, I get to fucking Long Beach. I kick open the door.

And he's, like, sitting there with his, like, fucking wrist in the air, like, in a pool of blood and shit. And I walk in, flip on the pool of blood blood fall into it and i fart fucking just start slapping him slapping him just like what's your favorite almond brother song what's your favorite almond brother song he like his eyes come open he's like whipping post if anyone who knows the song whipping post like is like i feel like dying it was like the craziest i just say and i say it is so traumatic very traumatic like i'm trying not to cry over here. Very traumatic, you know. But that was when I started going really off the rails.

Because this was still drug addict days, you know. I went really off the rails. That's a lot of trauma. Scaring my family, won't pick up the phone. You know, the crazy thing is like when I got into my car after the ambulance came and picked him up, I was like, you son of a bitch. I was like you you were giving me a story weren't you you were giving me some kind of crazy story from my life like weren't you like you son of a bitch do i like just die alone like for real like is that my journey and like like look like like obviously it sounds whatever but

it's also like so romanticized to me because i'm like tortured locked up artist in the middle of the woods painting and smoking cigarettes you're not gonna die alone you're not you know what I know when I say that it sounds like one of those things but I am like I'm such a lover boy in those things where I'm just like yeah I know it sounds like like sad but to me it's so romanticized and so just like you know what? Like, I've had it. I've felt it. And like, we'll see what happens. You have manifested, not that a woman will make you any more than you already are your whole by yourself,

but you have manifested everything in your fucking life. Yeah. You are going to manifest the perfect woman for you. Yeah. You just have to believe that. True. Like, you have believed in yourself and everything else that you have done in this life. You have to start believing it.

Stop romanticizing being alone and start romanticizing falling in love. Start visualizing your perfect girl. I would tell you a trick to do, but I don't know if I'll get in trouble on the podcast. But it's like a... Well, then cut it if it is, but tell me. So when you're masturbating... Yeah. Mimi is like, oh, here we go.

Hard. This is great. No, when you're masturbating, envision. Mimi is like, oh, here we go. So when you're, when you're great. No, when you're masturbating, envision the perfect woman that you want and masturbate to her and to you, you know, fruition. That's great because I don't watch porn. They say that if you do that, you're literally manifesting the person that you want. And these people will start coming into your life. It's real. Try it.

Let me know how it goes. Call me afterwards. I'm like i gotta get past some of this previous manifesting that i've been to it i like clear the told me that like uh 20 years ago clear the slate so if you're jerking off to celebrities you're manifesting celebrities i'm thinking i'm thinking maybe the therapist was wrong about the whole start of the trauma. I think we just actually found the reason. Let's kind of paint a picture about what happened with your grandfather.

So there was an undercover agent named Joe Pistone. You got it again. Infiltrated the mob as Donnie Brosco. Well, everybody thinks that my grandfather was the one who introduced him to everyone. He wasn't. My grandfather got introduced to Pistone from another man. So the guy introduced Pistone. Then my grandfather and him became extremely close. Kind of had a gambling problem. Enter Joe Pistone, AKA Donnie Brosco presents himself as this jewel thief, hustler, whatever. And he starts working with your grandfather to initially start paying back his debts, right?

They were making money. Whatever he did with that money, yes, it was definitely to pay debt, probably to go pay some more, probably to go buy us gifts, whatever it was. It was for his lifestyle and to pay off debt, but also to keep gambling. This man was so engulfed in this lifestyle

that I think he never would have quit. Like they pulled him off because supposedly there was going to be a hit on my grandfather. So they, they closed down the whole operation. My grandfather's body language changed differently so much that day. It was, it was always about me and fussing and fussing, but he became like talking in the corner, like not himself. Like I could read his body language. He was like, you know, he took whatever happened to him, like a man, he never ratted, He never cooperated. But he was still nervous because a lot of stuff was happening. He knew something was going down. I OD'd over this. I just lost my whole life. Couldn't come

up for air. Jennifer wasn't talking to me for a year and a half. Everything in my life was falling apart. My son didn't want to talk to me. Nobody wanted to talk to me. You lost your father too. Everything just started piling up and piling up and piling up and piling up. I gave up. When did you overdose? May. I just like, I lost my shit, man. September 18th, someone gave me a bag of fentanyl when it was supposed to be cocaine.

Was it somebody you trusted or you just got it from a dealer? I said, make a phone call, do me a favor, da da da. And she's like, okay. I vouched for him. I said, okay. I died in a restaurant in Florida. And she's like, OK. I vouch for him. I said, OK. I died in a restaurant in Florida. I was dead. Intervated for three days.

No one in my family came to the hospital. And I spent nine days there learning how to walk again. That was it for me. I said, OK. You did a line of the stuff and how long? I don't remember anything. You don't? OK, so you did a-

Three days are wiped from my brain. Literally, you just, that was it. You didn't feel anything. I don't know anything you don't okay three days are wiped from my brain literally you just that was it you didn't feel anything i don't know i don't know what happened at all i don't remember anything and why did nobody from your family come see you they were just all mad they said i wasn't gonna make it and my family didn't want to they just couldn't do it enough i mean and i don't blame them i don't uh i put them through hell hell I put them through I was so wrapped up in wrestling or whatever that I just I didn't enjoy myself as a child and when I was in school I got bullied you know we talked about earlier it was good having that family but in school it was rough my mom actually went missing for six months when I was a kid too and when I was in school people

would bully me for that and I remember I got kicked out because I beat the shit out of this girl because she said something about my mom and so when she was on the toilet she was taking a shit but i kicked in the door and i was swinging on her with the fucking trousers down to her ankles and stuff i love how violent you are on her i was like you fucker piece of shit and then why did mom disappear for six months she just she had a mental breakdown so my mom when she was younger she was also abused by her stepdad. And she was also gangbanged. And so she went through a really tough time.

And her family ditched her. They didn't believe her. And my dad did, though. He was just like, come here. And he took care of her. But she had a really, really tough time getting over that. I don't think that's something you'll ever get over. No, you don't.

I think it kind of takes a piece of you. Exactly. It just learns to feel different. Yeah. And she and she had like an eating disorder along with it so whenever she you know she's feeling bad all the weight just drops off she stops eating completely and she gets so sick that she can barely walk around what was the light at the end of the tunnel up for you what was the final straw that you know those tapes came out you said you tried to commit suicide on facetime with your mom and thank god it didn't work but in that moment that you're thinking about taking your life was that the moment that you were like something's got to give i have to change actually no it wasn't that moment i was still really low it took a while still to get

over that but i remember going into a grocery store and my hair was matted i was trying to cover it with a cap you know and again really again, really skinny. I was in the liquor aisle. And this little girl came past. And she just thought I was this fucking Wonder Woman superhero. Like she was just, she hadn't read the internet. She's too young, you know. She just looks at me as Paige at the time, you know. And she thought I was just the coolest thing since sliced bread.

I realized at that moment. Because I always thought that role models were perfect, right? But they're not. Role model is not perfect. The thing that makes you a role model is the fact that you fuck up. But you end up getting out of it and going on the other side and like you know taking ownership of that and kind of helping people get through those kind of things you know absolutely that gave me goosebumps i look at this little girl and

she's looking at me not knowing like anything that's going on in the world but she just thinks i'm the coolest thing ever you know and it kind of like makes me think about that and i'm like what the fuck am i doing head with waking up one day with the person you don't want to be with and the switch kind of flip on that being like what the fuck am I doing and everything just starts like falling into place it was so weird it all happened like very suddenly like everything was just like flip flip it was like an epiphany yeah I'm like what the fuck is happening I woke up one day like that and then I called WWE and they bought my flight and took me back to Florida and took care of me and i got back into training training again and then i start wrestling again and it was like

this big moment and then bam my neck gets kicked and i have to retire much stronger mentally that everyone was really worried like oh my god she's gonna fucking freak out again i was at such a good stage in my life at that point coming out of it i was like i'm never gonna hit that rock bottom again you learned your lesson yeah that's the most important part i think of fucking up it's okay to fuck up but learn your fucking lesson and don't fucking let yourself become that person again i knew things were going on i you know they were like you always know when they're cheating yeah you always know it's not it's never fucking not noticeable but i remember i met him at the hilton at universal and i just like was like do you want this anymore he's like i'm gonna go to new york I'm gonna go do Letterman and when I come back we're gonna start fresh he's

like I want you and the baby you're my girls we're gonna start the you know he's like go he's like go buy some art for the house go get some you know new things for the house when I come back we're gonna start fresh and I was like okay that was like on a Friday do you think he really genuinely in that moment meant that or do you think he was pacifying the situation because he wanted to avoid confrontation i'll never know you'll never know i'll never know i was in our home our mansion in bel-air my mother was there my girlfriend and we were watching the latin grammy awards they were like oscar de la joya is about to hit the red carpet and meanwhile i'm calling him like hey honey did you get home all right we all looked at each other like oscar de la joya's on the red carpet like what the the fuck is he doing there? This is in, it's in LA, you know?

So we're like, wait, what? And they go to a commercial break. What is he doing there? Why the fuck am I not there? Like what's happened? Comes back and there he is holding hands with his now ex-wife, Millie. And I just was like,

next day they had a lawyer come to the house and say, you and the baby need to, you know, need to move out. You know, this is so crazy. This, he wanted to meet me. And so I went and I met him like the next day and I, and he, and it was the first time I'd seen him since. How long after? It was about a month since the Latin Grammy Awards. Okay gotcha. Like I don't want to legally go after you like can we like can you help me like I

don't know what I'm gonna do like where am I gonna live like. He goes you know you already took me to court for child support I'm not happy about that and he goes and if you sue me for palimony he goes I'm not gonna see you or the baby till she's 16 years old. It was like, no fucking way. No way would you do that. And he goes, I have more money than God. Don't be too hard on me.

And he left. That gave me goosebumps. And he fucking left. And I sat in that car. I'm only crying. I sat in the car and I cried for like, fuck, man. And I just was like, there's no way. But he didn't see the baby and I until she was about 16 years old wow yeah he didn't my heart just dropped my mom told me that i

was born into just a bunch of kentucky white trash witches there was like seven of them and they were just like all had gifts they all were like spiritual yeah she you got from her there's something hidden about it there's a tie to your family and it's i forgive me for saying this it's connected to war back in the time so when you say warrior but it's connected to like american war and i almost want to say in the appalachians your family was connected to that so there's there's hierarchy in the family unit and then your mother's side cast out over here i'm getting that And it makes her nervous that you're going to find this out

because it's going to kind of undermine who you thought you were. Not the witch part. That's probably why you were pushed over here. It's not what you think. She was hidden. Your mom was hidden. So they didn't tell her the full truth.

Even if they told her truth, it was bits and pieces and not fully true. Can I stop finding out shit about my weird ass fucking family this life? I'm so tired of it. You have guides around you. You have a lot of people. You have like wild lifetimes with very indigenous people. So meaning you have that in your background as well. So there's like lineage all the way. You have a lot of people around you, like from many, many, obviously it's many

lifetimes because it wouldn't be in the most recent three that you've been that. He manifested, I think it was Elvis's birthday. Somebody emailed the other night I was talking about this so I have like your sets like a couch that was behind me and it had a blue throw on it it was in my other studio they're all crying over here it made me cry too I am I'm sorry no don't apologize for being vulnerable it's yeah it's the the one way to get at me is to say something about my kids Keithy came through. So I was sitting and the two chairs were behind me and people started going, look, look what's happening behind you. So I turn, I can't see anything because the lights in my face and I don't see anything. They're like, there's the face, there's the face.

And I'm like, I'm live streaming so I can hear them. I mean, see the thing. And I'm like, oh, it's got to be Jim Morrison. I'm screwing around. I have a picture. It's Keith's profile from his picture. Someone took a picture of me with it behind it and attached Keith's face beside it to show that like he manifests, he manifests all the time. So I get comfort in that. Although I'll tell you as a medium who's lived through this, I still want my

son here. There is nothing you can tell a mother or a person who's lost somebody that makes them feel better. So I don't even think I make people feel better when I tell them if I tell them I because I miss my son. So you can tell me stuff. Doesn't matter. I want my Keith here. I think your soul is always going to ache for him. But it has brought me so many lovely people who so many people reached out. Oh, my God. I was dying. Like, so you were doing fighting.

You were doing Playboy. And you were also dealing with an abusive relationship. Yes. An extremely abusive relationship. You told me one day we're going to laugh about him. And it was so hard to even think about that because I thought the pain would never go away. I thought I would never get away from him. Came into my life.

Good looking dude. Good looking. Little rich boy. He slowly started verbally abusing me and then he started putting his hands on me. The worst beatings I've ever had in my whole life have not been in a ring. It was from that man. He chipped my teeth, grabbed me one time, even on my chest, and squeezed so hard that it looked like my implant had popped. I had to go to the doctor. It was completely black. Left a handprint on me. I remember that. He threw me out of a car. Did degrading stuff to me. Got me on the ground.

Beat me up. Elijah had to jump on him when he was like five years old. My son had to see this man abuse me. Because I thought that that was normal. Because the way I grew up. And it wasn't. And that is not normal. And it was crazy because from the outside looking in,

you would think that you guys had the perfect relationship of what was going on because everything was like, you know, you guys had a beautiful house, drove nice cars, you were in Playboy, you're fucking, you know, fighting in the ring. And then behind closed doors, this is what's really going on. You were living an absolute nightmare. I don't know how many times I had to go over there because he was doing something fucking weird, man. This dude was so sick mentally that he

would try to manipulate our friendship he said that i fucking sucked him off one time he wanted to make me think that nobody was there for me and i had nobody on my side because that's what abusers do it was sick like there was no links that this man wouldn't go to to try to control you isolate you from everybody around you i've got to get her out of the situation but really nobody could get you out of that situation until you were ready to get out of that situation, because it is so hard to leave an abusive relationship. Well, we were also using a lot of drugs back then. Well, cocaine is a hell of a drug, right? We partook in a lot. Do you remember that one time I overdosed on glass at fucking Ben's house? Ben, the fucking paint huffer? Oh, we were just talking about him. My dad,

we're just talking about him. We had started partying at such a young age that as we got older, the problem with Vegas is, and I mean, I love Vegas. I always have a love for it because that's what, that was our hometown, but going to the bar and having 10 drinks and doing a fucking eight ball of cocaine as normal behavior every night. It's like, if that's how in Vegas, that's, it's normalized. Yeah. So we thought this was just a lifestyle. We didn't think that it was a habit, you know, whereas I found out down the road later on that I had a fucking habit. You know, I don't know about you. Well, yeah, I mean, people were drinking and partying in my family, and they were popping pills. And it's like somebody was handing me a joint from a young age. And because of that, it caused me to have a problem.

So I thought it was normal. And then by the time I realized it wasn't, it was too late. I'm lucky to be alive. We are lucky to be alive. Oh, for sure. Because that was rough. You know, I couldn't imagine my kids doing that. We were just talking about that before the mics were going on.

And I was like, I think of how Bailey is 16 and how I had already been gone away from home for two years at her age and it's fucking wild. And you know, it's like, I would never want her to have to go through what I went through, but it's just like a different generation type thing that we just really experienced so much so early on. But I'm glad that we are where we are now because at least we found our way out of it. Some people don't find their way out of it. Can we circle back to your son that you just lost in 2023? Can we talk about that and what happened? If I don't get emotional. He wanted to go home. He said he wanted to be with God. That we could happen. I was in Detroit. He was in LA and he called me sadly to see you. And I said, well, I'll be there tomorrow. And I flew to LA. We spent the most beautiful time

together. Just him and I talked and we ate and we laughed and we had a great time. So I flew to LA. We spent the most beautiful time together. Just him and I talked and we ate and we laughed and we had a great time. So I left on a Friday and said, make a promise that we would never go a day without speaking. He said, okay. You know, I'm not thinking like that. I said, okay. I got home. I called him. I said, I made it. He said, okay. Talk to you tomorrow. Saturday came. Didn't talk to him. You know, still didn't think nothing of it. Sunday came, I was calling him, didn't talk to him. I panicked automatically. I said, God, this is not supposed to happen.

We supposed to talk every day. Something is wrong. Something is wrong. Calling his wife, which I never do. Boy, it's just I haven't heard from him. And she said, well, he's okay. He's at home. He's just going through a lot.

And I said, well, what is he going through? You know, we were talking, we were chatting. I I said I'm about to run in Starbucks I'll call you back so about time I got my Starbucks got back in the car called it back and she was like he's gone I said who's gone the J's gone like gone where she said he's gone just that fast so he took his own life oh my gosh i'm so sorry just that fast so let's circle back to when you guys did get indicted how much time did you get how much time did your son get and how much time did terry get i got 57 months my son got 11 years one of my nephews got eight years one got nine years one got 11 and one got 13. Terry got 30 years he came home on the care exact so but Demetrius is not home. You spoke a lot about being in prison what you had to do

how you had a change of heart and in prison was pretty much like your lowest. That's your lowest like I said stripped of everything this is my time to reflect on how did I get here. I walked on that yard I was in the middle of a sandstorm. And I looked up at the sky and I told God, please help me. Why am I here? Please change me. Let me figure out why I'm here. I knew God.

We called on God all the time. You know, when you're in the streets, you probably, God, let me get through this. Okay, God, I'm about, you know. One more time. One more time. You know, you got all those drugs. You driving or you doing something. Come on, God.

Thank you, God. I'm blessing him for the wrong things, you know. And when I end up in prison, I realized that I had to call on him much more than I ever had to call on him in my life. When I was in prison, I was alone. No matter how many women were around me, I felt alone. And I had to call on this man and get on my knees and call on him like I'd never called on him before remember that I'm saying this there's some acknowledgement around a Frank that

comes through just remember that I'm saying that there's some significance usually who they are who they're with there's somebody but there is an acknowledgement there if some people who are not family who pop through what up homies it's probably some of the homies that have passed over. I think so. I see some symbology around marriage, union, joy, happy for you. The way I would word this, if there's anybody who you feel has passed, who loved you a hell of a lot, and maybe could have seen a romantic future, but it wasn't the right time or the right place, just remember that I'm saying this.

Probably my ex, Tony. I think that guy wants you to know how proud of you he is and that he, when he comes across, acknowledges an awareness and existence in your relationship and that you deserved more than he was able to give at that time. Anybody got a Frank? If anybody's got a Frank in the building.

Who's got a Frank? Who's a Frank? Frank is one of my ex-boyfriends, but he's still alive. He's still with us. Tony, so my ex, I was actually pregnant's still alive still with us tony so my ex i i was actually pregnant with his child i lost his baby but we were young young young young but when i ran away from home he was my boyfriend and like my protector and he actually always loved me and we just oh my gosh okay so i know how it came into play oh my god it just hit me right now when

tony was dying my i was with frankie and we went to his bedside and i could see tony i knew he was already dead my ex had smoked a fake weed and it sent him into cardiac arrest and he died oh my god that can happen he didn't die automatically but he went into a coma he had a heart attack went into a coma and i went to go see him and i remember i held his hand and when i was holding his hand, I could see him standing looking at me in the corner of the room. And I even looked at my ex Frankie at the time and I was like, he's dead.

I was like, he's not coming back. He's in the corner of the room right now looking at us. I need you to tell the bully story because this is like something out of a fucking movie. Kind of took my breath away because I could visualize it. I'm such a visual person. When I was in middle school, I was bullied relentlessly. There was an instance where there was this kid who used to beat me up pretty regularly. He and

a number of his friends had watched me go into the school bathroom alone. And I didn't realize at the time, but I was washing my hands and my hands were wet. And I heard the door open from behind me. And when I looked, I realized he and about three other people came in. And as they rushed in, they blocked the door. They were going to beat up our little Tyler. I didn't know this little homo. What? You were really going to take me gonna take me out like come on that's low hanging fruit baby the bullies they blocked the door i'm excited and this weird instinctual thing came over made it up which is a defense mechanism or what but i made eye contact with him and as i did i just said your aunt knows that you were crying with your dad last night and you need to leave me alone and i just said it

point blank and as i said this his friends looked at him he looked at them and i always say faster than you could say gay they were like out of that bathroom it took off running because his friends didn't know what was going on but his aunt had passed and what was crazy is the night before he'd been crying in his dad's arms about that loss and it was actually a very humbling moment it scared the crap out of him but it for me really helped both protect me and years later he reached out and actually thanked me. Oh, because you taught him probably a lesson there that he was taking his anger and his hurt out on somebody else. That's very true. That's amazing.

It was really fascinating and kind of an interesting moment of growth for both of us. Do you guys really think Drake has had a BBL? Yes. Yeah, definitely. Really? Them abs came out of nowhere. I didn't see them posted. I've never seen him with his shirt off.

I've never looked, though, either. Yeah, he posted something with his shirt off. feel like it was like right off the table so you think he's had ab sketching i think so i would get absession i'm not judging him at all i would do it too yeah well i've had it done really really i know a lot of girls who've had it my doctor does abs sketching hella good but i didn't get abs sketching love it i'm i'll show you guys my stomach whenever i stand up oh my god i remember this i knew there's one girl who went and got abs sketching in freaking Mexico,

and she came back looking like Superman. That shit was terrible. That's a bit much. Yeah, it was bad. I felt bad when the girl was... You know like a six pack is too much? A four pack is cool. Or just like a little choo-choo.

Yeah, that's what I did. I just did a little chiseling, and that's it. Yeah, that's cute. Like a little cheese. I did this in 2015, though, before everybody and their mom was doing it, so I didn't even know what the fuck my doctor was doing. He's like, I'm just gonna do a little...

Yeah, I'm just like, just make me look good, please.