Duncan Trussell Family Hour - 564: Ian Fidance

Episode Date: May 5, 2023

Ian Fidance, hilarious comedian and incredible podcaster, re-joins the DTFH! Check out Ian's podcast, Bein' Ian With Jordan, available everywhere you listen to podcasts. Original music by Aaron Michael Goldberg. This episode is brought to you by: This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/duncan and get on your way to being your best self. Athletic Greens - Visit AthleticGreens.com/Duncan for a FREE 1-year supply of vitamin D and 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase!

Things are getting clearer, yeah I feel free to bare my skin, yeah that's all me, nothing to me, go hand in hand, nothing on my skin, that's my new plan, nothing is everything. Used to go to the park and look down at my skin, wonder what it would be like if I was looking, then I found some cream in my life and came a dream cause I learned that nothing is fucking everything. Things are getting clearer, I can see an infinite void inside of me, nothing on my skin, that's the new plan, nothing anywhere, I'm a Nihilist man. No matter what they tell you, only one thing's true, there isn't really of me and there's

definitely not a you, from dust you came and to dust you will go. Don't fill the highway on your grave and nobody will know. Things are getting clearer, I got tricked into sucking the demiers, a giant dick. Nothing is everything. That is of course a track from the Richard Dawkins script that they just turned into a movie. It's called Jesus Christ Superstar 2. I was really, really wrong and it stars Kevin.

I'm really excited to see Kevin in this film. If you're wondering why my voice sounds like this, I will tell you why. It's cause I updated my operating system which is something you should never do if you work with audio. You should just leave it alone. If it works, that's great. Are you updating? What are you hoping for?

Nothing's going to change that much and yet I do it. Every time I see that software update available, I get excited, I click it. What the fuck am I looking for? A new emoji? What am I doing? And now this is the price that I pay and unfortunately updates roll down hell. You have to endure this intro with my voice sounding like I have a woman in a well that I'm about to skin.

Children, I'm going to be at Helium in Portland this weekend. Almost all those shows are sold out. Probably by the time you hear this, it will be sold out. So why am I even mentioning it outside of some cheap insecurity based way to inflate my ego? It's pretty gross. But shows that I haven't sold out yet. Copper Blues Alive, Phoenix.

That's going to be June 1st through the 3rd and then I'm going to be at the Dania Improv in Dania Beach, Florida, June 15th through the 70th. Look, I don't care where you live. I don't care if you are one of those scientists in a deep underground military bunker in Antarctica. I need you to come to this Dania Improv show. I've never been to Dania Beach. It sounds nice, but I need my people there. So please, it doesn't matter.

Do you live in the Hall of Earth? Are you someone who transcended when the great city of Shambhala reached a high frequency and shifted into some alternate dimension? Get the fuck back here. Pack your bags. We're going to Dania Beach, Florida. Are you in Japan? Are you in the Ukraine?

Are you in Russia? Are you fighting on either side? Don't care. You're going to get in a caravan. You're coming to Dania Beach, Florida, wherever you may be. Even if this involves putting off dying during a certain phase of the moon, I need you there. Dania Beach, Florida, all those tickets can be found at dunkintrussell.com. Also, won't you subscribe to the Patreon?

It's patreon.com. You will get commercial free episodes of this podcast. Now, today, Ian Fidance is here with us. He is so, that was somebody texting me from Shambhala telling me they're coming to the show in Dania Beach. Ian Fidance is so fucking funny. He just opened for me at the mothership and he just keeps getting funnier and funnier and funnier. Not only that, he's an incredible podcaster. You want the proof? The proof can be found at Ian Ian with Jordan podcast.

Also, you must go see him perform. He's going to be at Zenith in Nashville. This podcast will go up on Thursday. Just go Friday, Saturday. He is so insanely funny. I give him 9,000 pentagrams. All right, I guess that's it. Now, let's...

Oh, wait, it's not it. Also, he's got a lot of other dates coming up. You can find him at DunkinTrustle.com. Just click on this episode and all of his dates will be there. So, you could see if he's coming to a city near you. Now, if he happens to be in a city near you at the same time, I'm going to be at the Dania Beach improv. Don't go to his show.

Come to my show. Hitchhike. Get in hot air balloon. Do whatever it takes. Crawl. Crawl if you have to. I need you at the Dania Beach improv. All the dates, of course, are at DunkinTrustle.com.

Everybody, welcome Ian Finest, the EDFH. Ian, welcome back to the DTFH. Look at you. You've got a background now. You've gone pro. It looks great. Thank you, man. I'm in my podcast studio for being Ian with Jordan,

and it is in the basement of my apartment. So, it's a long trek to work. It looks fucking great. You've got your Ghostbusters background. I'm seeing a lava lamp, Lucky Cat, Minora. Some books. Yeah, thank you. My great books.

Yeah. Thank you, man. I appreciate it. I have enjoyed making this my own, and I feel like it's when we're down here, it just feels like we're hanging out in a basement. Your parents are in home and we're having big sleep over, you know?

Ian, can you turn your mic up for me a little bit? Is that possible? Yeah, give me one second. Oh, boy. Let me know. Let me know. Let me know. That's good.

Is this better? Yeah. Yeah, way, way better. Okay, cool. That's perfect. All right, good. That's good. Yeah.

Well, the studio looks good, but the sound is shit. That's the story of podcasting, baby. You can decorate this shit out of your studio. You can get a repaint. You can get all kinds of props set up, but the audio will fuck you every time. And if the audio isn't fucking you, this shit will pop up. Like right here, it says Ian is using a roadcaster.

I am. Make sure they're using the right mixing settings. Let's see. Ian has been embezzling money. Oh, yeah. No, that just came. That came with the warranty. It says on a roadcaster pro enable mix minus audio processing

and use roadcaster pro stereo and Riverside. Do you know how to do that? No, I don't. All right. Well, it sounds fine to me. Fuck you, Riverside. Leave me alone. Yeah.

Is this all right? Yeah. It's hard enough. I don't need you telling my guests how to do their fucking audio. Yeah. Fuck you. Fuck you, technology. Fuck you, AI.

Yeah. Fuck AI. God damn. Ted Kaczynski had it right. What? Yeah. Ted Kaczynski was fucking right. He called it from the get go minus the mail bombs thing.

He could have been a really great author. I know. I know. He just had to take it one step too far. You know, it's just, you know, the moment that you feel like you need to write a manifesto. That's a warning sign. That's like, we should be trained on that. Like I know that.

I know where I'm at when I get in the manifesto mood. All of a sudden you see me just taking stacks of paper and be like, yeah, I know what you mean. I'm just hiding them away from the camera. Pushing an old typewriter away. You, you can't write a manifesto on a computer. You got to type it. You got to get like a nice typewriter.

Oh yeah. Anything on the computer. It's passe. You got to go old school typewriter. Sign it in blood. Maybe, maybe put newspaper clipping letters on the envelope, you know, another bad sign. If you, it's like writer's block. How you know you've got it really bad is when you're on eBay looking at typewriters, like

you're fucked. You're so fucked. Cause you're like, the problem is the keyboard man. I'm thoughts, not my creativity. I've got it all right here. I just need an antiquated machine. I'll give you one. I'll give you one further.

Every time I go on eBay, I'm in a bad place. I'm never on eBay buying things because things are good. I'm doing it. So I have something to look forward to or fucking jump off a roof. I have never gone on eBay in a nice state of mind ever. Like every time it's the, it's really though. eBay is the bottom of the barrel for me. It's like, this means I've gone through all of Reddit conspiracy.

This means I have doom scrolled everywhere and all that's left is go on eBay and look at haunted dolls, which is a very interesting genre of, I'm serious man, haunted dolls on eBay. Have you ever checked them out? No. What is this? This is called capitalism. This is ultra capitalism.

So what people do is they go to a thrift store and they buy a creepy looking doll and then they put it on eBay, like sell it for 5,000 times more than they bought it for. And they just say, this is an extremely haunted doll and people want to buy haunted shit. So they're like, God damn, let's buy a haunted doll and they buy this shit. I'm haunted. Somebody buy me. My head is a haunted house. You could money into me.

You've got to take the first step. I'm telling you the haunted doll business. It's hot haunted dolls, haunted boxes on the dark web. You can get, I went through this whole thing. Like you can go on YouTube, the opening of haunted boxes bought from the dark web. It's a whole thing where people will order a fucking haunted box from no, they don't know who it is. Like this will, and it's horrible in like the sales pitch is just like it will ruin

your life. There's demons in the box. You should never open this box. And then they film themselves opening the box, sent to them from some Eastern European fucking entrepreneur inside is just chicken guts, ecstasy, yeah, there's drugs, they'll send drugs in the box. That's why I've got this, this Ghostbusters trap. To get all the spirits.

You need it. You need it. You, you, I guess some people just want to be cursed, you know, like they're so bored with their life. I wonder if it's a thing of like, you know, they're, they're haunted boxes, but do they ever do mystery boxes? Like you don't know what spirit's going to come. You just bid on it and it's like, you'll get a random spirit.

Yeah. That's kind of what it is. They don't say what comes in your shitty box. They just say it's going to fuck up your life. So there, there might be a thumb. I mean, this is from like, this is, this is, dude, this is from, um, uh, what's that movie? Uh, that, that hostile. This is from the darkened lands.

You know, this is like people who, who do communicate with Odin and they don't, they just are like, yeah, put Sven's thumb in. What do you mean? And then they'll just, yeah, body parts. Are they just shipping out the ingredients of a witch's cauldron? It's a great way to dispose of a body. It's like, wow, somebody up, you're in, you're in wherever balleris, you're out there. You have been, you know, you've got another body on your hands.

It's like you're sick of like the normal disposal methods. You just chop them up and send them out in dark web boxes. I mean, it, what is the shipping on that fucking expensive? I mean, that's why the, that's why the box is on, uh, the dark web costs. I mean, I don't even go on the dark web. I went on there once. I, I, I had my acting like I'm a hacker. I've been on there once.

Like I got creeped out and never went on it again. I was, I wanted to do a joke of like, uh, remember when there was that rumor that Wayfair was shipping child sex slaves in furniture? That was crazy. Right? Anyway, uh, does anyone want, uh, Shae's lounge unused Shae's lounge. Yeah. That was a real, that was a fun one.

That was like peak QAnon hysteria there. Uh, I went on the, did you check it out? I went on the Wayfair site to like sort of examine this overpriced furniture and it seemed like it was like an AI had just fucked up. Like they have an AI that kind of populates it with bullshit and AI had just gotten confused or whatever. Definitely. Probably, I'm sure there's like better ways to sell your kid than to like go up, like

create a fake Wayfair furniture account. Right? Yeah. I mean, literally, there's got to be a better way to sell kids. Yeah. I mean, I don't know, I'm, I'm a fan of the good old faction auction. You know, yeah, whatever happened is bidding, bidding in the market, you know, whatever happened to that, man?

I mean, I don't want to get political and everything. And I, you know, I don't want to get all dismal and shit, but you remember those days you'd go to the child market and it was like, it was fun. You'd get caramel corn pizza and then you just, you know, child. Who wants to, who wants to fucking buy a kid? Yeah. That's the other thing. What are you doing?

Like it's like five million times worse than a puppy. Like it's going to, what are you going to do with that? It's good. Oh yeah. I mean, a puppy you've got 12, 16 years, maybe a kid 18 plus you're not, you got to hide them. You're going to spend all, I mean, it's just too much work. Who's got the time we're so like the most naive idiots on earth.

We think child traffickers are like putting them through college. Oh, that's so funny. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You got to get them to sporting events. You got to sign them up for camp. I mean, it's just such a responsibility.

It's too much. Why are they doing that to themselves? Kids are so expensive, the food, medicine, you got to get their vaccine, medicine, vaccine. What do they need braces? My God. Jesus. Yeah, that's got to suck when you, when you buy your kid and the shipment, the Wayfair shipment comes and you open it up and you're like, Hey, you're home now.

Can I get you a smack and cheese? Can I see your teeth? Yeah. Fuck. Fuck. You just got your braces off and now you got to get your wisdom teeth out. When does it stop? This episode has been sponsored by BetterHelp.

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You just got your braces off and now you're going to get your wisdom teeth out. When does it stop? Fuck! I'm never ordering from Wayfair again. Yeah, leaving a negative review about the child you received from Wayfair. The child I received from Wayfair does not pay attention in karate. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're not applying to themselves and they have really bad ADHD.

I don't like it. There is some creepy statistic I read, maybe not true, that said human trafficking is one of the number one industries on the planet. Did you read that? No, it's so bleak. It's so sad. It's so sad. It makes me sad because I never traveled as a child and I feel like that could have

really helped me out. These kids get to see the world. But I mean, how does that even, I just, I guess I don't understand how it works. Like first you got to procure the kid, packaging, like how do you even send a kid in a box? What do they put them into? Do they wrap them in bubble tape or is it? I don't know. Well, I mean, every kid's allergic to peanuts, so you can't use those, you know, styrofoam

peanuts anymore. So how do you, how do you, I got to get a trafficker on the show. Yeah, yeah, man. Yeah, just hang out in a Greyhound station, you'll find one. You know, this is I think why sex robots are a good thing. I think it's going to take care of a lot of the human trafficking problem, like just robots in general, like humans are difficult to work with, you know, but once we get robots going, it's going to kill the child trafficking business.

It's probably going to fuck up the economy because who wants to order a human slave when you can order like a robot? It's legal. It gets upgrades, you know what I mean? No one's going to do it anymore. Like I'm sure that there's a lot of human traffickers out there who are shaking in their boots right now. It's going to be interesting when self-driving Mack trucks deliver the robot child sex robots.

It's like, man, we've really gotten the human aspect out of everything. Out of everything. All that's left is just fucking self-driving cars, Mack trucks, baristas or robots and just everyone's just inside fucking their sex robot. That's all it is. There's no one goes outside in every home. People are just fucking their sex robot. You go to your friend's house.

He's got a nicer sex robot than you. You know, it's going to be that like, you know, the my least favorite kind of car commercial is where the dude is in his driveway with his new shit car. It's some dumb car and his neighbor is jealous. You know that genre of car commercials? It's so, no one cares about your car. Do you know how many commercials I've auditioned for where I'm the jealous neighbor? And they're like, okay, so you're mowing your lawn and you pop your head up over the fence

and go, uh, for tourists, it's the saddest, worst car. It's a lease. You own the fucking car. You got it for no money down. It's a shit car and your neighbor acts like the, the grail, the arc of the covenant is in your fucking driveway car, car companies, man. They really are like just the worst when it comes to social engineering. They're just, they, they, they either play on jealousy or they play on the dream of a

new life. Like somehow they try to tie that car up and like your life is starting over. They're always, they're always driving in nice neighborhoods and the family's happy. There needs to be a real car commercial where it's just a dad yelling at the kids to shut up in the back. Yeah. The husband and wife are trying to not get divorced. They turn the music up so the kids won't hear them arguing.

Yeah. And he's like, just no more fucking Taylor Swift, you bitch. There's, there's fucking cans, beer cans rolling around. God damn it. Do you know he couldn't afford this shit, you bitch. It's not going to fix anything. You fuck Darrell. You're going to make me late for my GED class.

You're going to fuck Darrell. You're going to fuck Darrell in this one too. You're going to fuck him in the back. Stop, stop crying back there. I thought this car would fix everything, but it can't just doesn't do it anymore. That's what, you know what, what they need to do is like the car commercial version of that would be they're driving in this car, kids are in the backseat. Taylor Swift is playing and the guy looks over at her and he's like, you know what,

it's okay that you fuck Darrell. And then like happy music plays, like the car fixed the adultery. That's what we need. There are the other car commercial, which is a family related, family related one says two things. One, the car you're driving in is 100% going to kill your family to if you if you buy this car, your family will live happily forever. That's the other genre of it is my, I love the outdoors.

So that that's the other genre is like now that you have this Range Rover, you were going to be like driving off road through the Grand Canyon or something with your, with your love at a time when now more than ever, people are never leaving the house. They're like, yeah. This is so unrealistic. The family's driving go camping. It's like nobody does that anymore. It's like the phone camera commercials.

Like whenever they're trying to sell a foot, no one gives a fuck about the phone function anymore. No one cares about the internet function. All they have left is the camera and so those commercials give you the impression you're going to get into extreme sports if you buy, you know, it's like it's all it's dudes doing backflips on fucking half pipes and like doing like wing suiting. You get this fucking phone. You are going to be so active.

You won't even believe the reason you're not active right now is not because you're a flabby pussy. The reason you're not active right now is your phone sucks, man. You have a better camera, but that's not relatable. Make it for Americans. Make it for us. A camera that makes your dick look better in a dick. Ah, now there you go.

Jesus Christ, Ian, you need to get on the phone right now with Apple because that, you know what? It's one of these fucking stupid phones. I can't remember which one the selling point is it, do you know about this, the moon scam? No. Okay. The selling point was you can finally film the moon. Not only can you finally film the moon.

This fucker will zoom in on the moon, like the Hubble telescope and you're going to get like, it's like a moon telescope. It's not just a phone. So people started getting suspicious because they realized that the moon it's zooming in on, it seems to be kind of the same moon. It's like not the moon they're looking at. And all it was doing was taking and knew you were looking at the moon and then using like augmented reality to superimpose a preset moon.

And you would zoom in and be like, Oh my God, this is insane. Honey, come over here and look, will you stop fucking Daryl? Look at it. How good this picture is. And it was fake. It was a whole scam. It was like AR moon. That's so terrifying.

We're living in hell. I mean, God damn it. Yeah. Well, I mean, the, it is interesting that like, I mean, there was probably a time there's been, there's laws that are exist in existence now. We just take it for granted, but at some point those laws didn't exist. No one had made the law before the law existed. I don't know what the law I'm thinking of, but I'm certainly there's new laws that get

at it all the time because people exploit the system. But we, yeah, we don't have the laws we need right now. There's laws we need that just don't exist. And it's like, you know, the person who made the ozempic commercial. Do you watch TV much? No. You know the song? Oh, oh, oh, ozempic.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know that's okay. I get that confused with O, O, O'Reilly's auto parts. Is there an O, O, O'Reilly's? Those motherfuckers stole the O'Reilly's auto parts. Yeah, yeah. Oh-oh-oh, o-oh, o-oh, o-oh, o-oh-oh, o-oh-oh, o-oh-oh, o-oh-oh, o-oh-oh, o-oh-oh, o-oh-oh, o-oh-oh, o-oh-oh, o-oh-oh.

That should be illegal. Like do you ever made the song? The musicians involved. The writer of the song. The person who funded the song that should be like a five year prison sentence. Like they should know and they're making the song. Oh yeah, whoever made, whoever! Whoever made the cars for kids commercials should be drawn and quartered in a public square

Listen, you're a little more extreme, but you would be welcome on our council of judgment Thank you Love to have you we could have it like the points of a pentagram everyone sits on a point Then we all sort of we have I don't know blood marbles or something to vote marbles made of the crystallized blood of People who've made shitty commercials and you just drop them in and then boom Whoever is like making this MK ultra shit goes to jail for you or drawn and quartered I won't protest if people vote drawn quartered with drawn quarter. I'll be the I'll quarter I'll whatever the I'll tie the fucking rope to the hoof. I mean I mean why not two for one the the blood and body parts

We draw from them. We put in a box and sell them on the dark web and make Millions curse curse boxes curse boxes from the council of six We're the ones who put those in big I mean You when you think about it though like the The the studio sessions for recording the ozympics song like what's the energy in the room when you're recording? Pharmaceutical companies music like it can't be good like the energy in the room is just or My real fear is that like obviously I've thought about this too much. Is it You know after a really good ozympic take somebody in the studio was like

Incredible that was incredible You know like they're so oblivious to What their lives have turned into that it's flipped to the other side. We're like Jesus God. I told you Greg would be good Yeah, did you hear that it they they act like when the wonders from that movie hear their song on the radio for the first time Running around screaming Running around screaming babe, babe, it's me daddy. Is that you? Oh God that fight the other one that is like permanently burnt into my head is Nothing is everything. You know that one. No, it's guys. It goes things are getting clear

I can see bump bump bump bump up Nothing is everything It's for this. It's an eczema Cream it's an eczema cream It's Man, you are healthy you ride bikes You're out there in the world. You're anytime I talk to someone it's a test honestly like if you seeing the The the Sky Rizzy commercial to someone and they've never heard it. It means their life is better than yours

It's just there's no way around it. Your life is better than mine You're if you've avoided that commercial. It says so many things. You don't watch Fox news you Problem you don't you don't go on the internet that much you don't you're not blasting your mind with filth Yeah, I mean instead, you know, I'm a pillar of health. I'm a two-pack a day's smoker And I'm like, yeah, I don't need pharmaceutical commercials Even though I'm gonna be on every medication ever when I'm dying from lung cancer Well, look, I mean what look do you but you're but you're my it's you know

You see the shits of wild animals and they're just just worms you inside of wild animals They're just yeah, I once I was on this this island and I saw a deer Just covered in fucking mosquitoes and pox and pus and you know, this is like the real Bambi This is a fucking creature that should be it's just a walking blood bag and it's a it's a host organism Right, that's me for you're clean. You're pure. You don't have the sky or you don't wake up with nothing is everything You don't wake up with it something that was definitely created by people who for sure spent time at the CIA I do for sure have interrogated the Taliban and Or poor people that weren't in the Taliban and they just

Couldn't have the an understanding of the language so they just assume they're guilt Yeah, yeah, right that decision. You're you're out there You're a farmer the next thing you know stormtroopers have thrown you in a cargo jet And then you're just on some island that represents like a liminal space It's not really the United States. Yeah, yeah And they think because you're saying you don't know anything and you're pleading that you're just holding out and if they torch you enough You'll tell us something. Yeah, you got all these new agents are like, hey, can we try my thing? I'm telling you Please try my new

Synthetic cortisol mixed with PCP VR will make this fucking asshole sing like a bird Mm-hmm, you know, just people lining up to test their projects people lining up to Like hey, I know this doesn't necessarily have to do with interrogating the prisoner But I did notice he's got a pretty blazing case of eczema I was just gonna say let's get some ozampic in them and see what he says All of them all of them all of them ozampic sky Rizzy These are just fucking interrogation medications that didn't work to manipulate the prisoners and now they're like, well

Somehow their eczema got better. Yeah, we could price fucking well, I I will say what I found interesting is um With a lot of like depression and anxiety medications They'll run these ads and you'll notice in every ad they go ask your doctor about Slippity slap and With psychiatrists, and I don't know how it is with you know other doctors that are giving you like medicine and antibiotics and stuff but with psychiatry and everything they don't really know how that Medicine is gonna affect you and sometimes you have to say to your doctor. Oh, I've read up on a fexer

Can we try that and the doctor will be like, oh, yeah, you know, I haven't really thought of that sure So it's like these commercials are putting your own Livelihood in your own hands because the doctors are just throwing shit at the wall to see what'll stick and half the time You got to be on a medication for six months Just to see if the side effects go away and it works and afterwards you're like, oh, it doesn't work They're like, well, let's start it over again. Just why so many people have a hard time with medication Well, and don't forget a lot of these companies they they pay doctors they come in they have these PR campaigns They lube up the docs. So you go in and you mention

Hey, oh Zempick, what do you think and the doctor will be like? Oh, yeah Oh, oh, oh Zempick fuck. Yeah, because I don't know this for sure But I think they're they might get some kind of bonus or you know if they prescribe it They get the whole thing is insane like it's in other countries. It's illegal for pharmaceutical companies to advertise You can't yeah, I mean, dude, there's a book called dreamland I think Samuel Kenyonis. I may be Butchering the the name of the author, but it's an incredible read about the opiate crisis and how Doctors were incentivized and also at the same time

They were kind of bullied into giving opiates because at a certain point they changed They kind of made Doctor visits like a Yelp review where the patient would be like they would review the doctor And if they didn't get the medication they wanted they would get the doctor a little review So in order to save their job, the doctor would just give the patient whatever they wanted so that then the patient would be like, yeah 10 out of 10 and And then doctors would just and they were getting paid per visit So if they saw 12 patients in a day in and out in an hour prescribing the medication

It'd be a lot faster than taking an hour or two to go through the patient's medical history This at the other and it was just so insidious and it's got satan. We are it It's worse than brave new world. It's where it would brave new world. This is kind of or is like utopian in this dark way people were Fucking each other on these like awesome Psychedelics this version of it is just like yeah, the doctor the doctors have been beaten down They need the business. They got the student loan debt They can't fuck off and like not prescribe synthetic heroin to people people don't want also they at some point You just realize as a doctor. They don't want to get better. They want to get high. That's all they want

They they're not coming to me because they want to feel better physically and exercise it It's not even gonna just give them the fucking oxy Codone or whatever it is. Okay, look, we're gonna cut to a commercial real quick Um, this episode of the DTFH has been sponsored by Pfizer Pfizer Hold on. I'll be right back. Hold on one second This episode of the DTFH has been supported by athletic greens. Look, I'm gonna be honest with you I've run out of athletic greens and today I took some kind of

Men's multi vitamin. It would have been better for me to throw live jellyfish Down into my stomach Then did they eat these old pills that I dug up in a in a drawer because of my greens drop Then an hour and I'm sorry if I'm over sharing here I could feel the vitamin waft as it was coming out of my stomach and those disgusting vitamin burps I don't mean to knock the vitamin industry But this world is an evolving world things get better

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slash Duncan that's athleticgreens.com forward slash Duncan check it out And we are back Um Dude, so did you know this little tidbit of data? apparently pharmaceutical companies They're 80 percent of the advertising of networks. Did you know that 80 percent? No, I don't know if that's true. I I go on so many websites Hold on. Hold on. This is so funny because you go. Did you know this?

Have you heard of the statistic 80 percent? Of ads are from pharmaceuticals and I'm like, holy fuck. That's wild. You know, yeah, actually, I don't know if that's true or not I might be talking down. Jerry's hold that up here. Hold on a second. Let me see Let me see pharmaceutical companies. Jerry get on it you motherfucker Farm pharmaceutical companies add revenue companies In 2020 the pharmaceutical industry spent 4.58 billion u.s. dollars on advertising So that's a huge

I mean you you don't even have to like trust my hippie ass like and don't listen But if you work at a pharmaceutical company, I love your many of your pills So don't feel bad, but you know, if you whoa, hey, what the you're you're cutting out big time I don't know. I got I can fix it. The Wi-Fi fix it. I got or Or what? Or if big farm is listening to us and it doesn't want us to talk about that. Let me check Yikes. Yeah, you were right. I just got the red light Oh, fuck

Okay, we're back. We are talking about pharmaceuticals We are talking about Corruption, but most importantly we're talking about how good it feels to get I went to a pillow. There was a pillow doctor In la that people started hearing about they're like you go there. You just ask him Whatever you want, he'll prescribe it for you. He does not give a shit about you So I went there because I'd heard about this new speed that fighter pilots were taking and I was really curious

I read all these articles that said it enhances your IQ. So I go to this fucking doctor The waiting room just filled with old people who need like morphine or whatever. He had his own pharmacy in the Waiting room like the way in in front of the waiting room is a pharmacist. So I go in with this doctor And I'm like, uh, didn't even did we didn't even pretend He wasn't like, let me take your pulse or anything. He's like, so what what's what's going on? I'm like, well, have you heard of this shit medoffin all or

And he's like, no, he had this dick exit and then I'm like, well, I want to take it And he's like, what is it? And I'm like some kind of fighter pilot speed and he's like, whoa And he looks it up. He googles it. He's like, well, he asked me he goes. What dosage do I give you? And I'm like, I have no idea. Wow. I'm not a I don't I don't know then he googles it And he's like writes a prescription for me right there and and then he's like, do you need anything else? I'm like, no, this is good. When was it left? When was this this was He got arrested. This was so long ago. It just didn't work. He was just writing scripts getting rid But he got busted. They shut him down. Thank god. But yeah, I mean those doctors are out there, man

They they they're like the Sith lords of doctors. They just want to they just want that fucking insurance money for Did they get when you come in? Yes, it's wild in in so many industries whether it's social services Public servants or even, you know doctors people stop Becoming people to you at a certain point and you just are earning a paycheck and then people turn into paperwork And I feel like your your soul and your consciousness leaves you and you're just

Doing a job instead of like sitting back and going. Oh I think I'm truly facilitating evil right now Yeah, yeah, well you you it's like I I think you know a few rotten clients. I think you know you after You you don't see the the normal sick people that you're helping You just remember the person who sued you or you remember the You know that somebody you fucked up your your doctor life a little bit or whatever and yeah, you just I I mean, I think people like us make the big assumption

That everyone is like us, you know, like you assume like yeah, I know I'm not the best person in the world You're no one's the best person in the world, but We make the assumption that there's people trying after they yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, who they go home. They made a mistake. They said something rotten to somebody They were in a bad state of mind and it bothers them as opposed to like people just the moment The the interaction has happened where they said the worst thing they could say to somebody or or fuck someone's life up They're not thinking about it two minutes later. It's not even on their minds. They're just You you ever play like nasty monopoly?

No, what is that? Well, it sounds a lot more fun than you know, just where you start playing monopoly in the game turns mean Oh, I thought it was a version that like Mattel was selling like adult monopoly. I was like, oh, what's nasty? Instead of buying property you buy people and you sell them. Yeah Yeah, nasty monopoly, baby. What are you willing to do for park plaza? Yeah, there's no money in nasty monopoly, but it does dispense lube You it's got lube dispensers on every the the you're getting out of pegging free card

The the I just think some people that that's how they live like they when I'm like that moment you let yourself go evil on monopoly And you know, this is just monopoly, but I'm gonna be evil. I'm gonna like be put play the part of a of a beast And then the game's over and like, you know Whatever your friends again. I think people They play life like that. So they you know, if you look at trump the trump The way he acts is the way I act when I'm playing monopoly and being mean, right? You know the you look at like biden. It's like another version of like

Mean monopoly player They I don't think they look at the world like we do. You know, I think you're totally right and and I think, you know Unfortunately and also, you know, I'm not a part of this group And I don't plan to be but I think a lot of it comes from parenting I think a lot of people anyone can be a parent, but to be a good parent It takes a lot of work and instilling values and instilling these ideas of Consequences and like actually really being in someone's life has long-term lasting effects

And I think a lot of people are poorly parented and it's just generationally repeated And on top of that, you know, uh on the flip side Anyone can be corrupted with money and power. So no matter how good you are or how good your intentions once you start Getting money and power. You're going to completely change and if you aren't rooted in good foundation of growth and You know something instilled in you you're your House of cards is easier to fall. I will say You know what we need We need a summer camp for wayward billionaires where like you take these shitty billionaires

You put them in this camp You don't get your phone You're there with other wayward billionaires and you you do group activities Learn to build fires together Rowing I don't know uh prayer circles. Oh, you can do your anxiety coloring book, which is what I had to do in rehab Anxiety coloring. Yeah, you draw what your anxiety looks like and for me it was just pictures of parents fighting Oh my god, dude. Yeah, this is like you I think you nailed it. I mean, it's it's it's never one thing But I do it's like why are parents bad parents or parents bad parents because they're evil? No, no

Parents are many parents or shitty parents because they're being crushed Under the heel of capitalism They fucking can't afford they the kids need cheese. They need bread. They need fucking milk You got a it's like you got a pick. Do you want hungry kids or kids who aren't hungry but are at a Garbage preschool. Totally. I've heard stories of these preschools, dude. Like the in in communism uh The idea was the state becomes your parents. So you you're your parent the the What are the nuclear family or whatever? This is bull this is bullshit. It produces too much

Too many problems within a nuclear family. You you if you're you can't really control stage one Mental manipulation because the parents who knows what they are. They're gonna tell the kids that they're Gonna go to hell if they die or they're gonna tell the kids that god is more important than the state or they're gonna fill the minds With antiquated filth. So the idea is you separate get the kids educated early on to know the state is mommy and daddy and mommy and daddy are just members of society, but they're

They're secondary to the state capitalism It's this chaotic version of that like we like to think we're not separating the children from the parents But we sure as fuck are but instead of sending them to like a state facility where they're like whatever saluting general Mao they're in a A preschool that smells like a fucking internment camp It smells like a civil war hospital. I've heard stories man. These kids are just on the floor crying There's too many kids not enough people. So This is the this this so you see a parent out in the world

Who's just trying to like care for their the kids they love And and they know that's happening. They have to go pick them up from there. They know that look on their kids face Is not the glassy Kids got the look on his face like he was at some famous world war two battle or something and he can't Articulate to you what happened. He pulls his pacifier out of his mouth like a cigarette. He's like I've seen some bad things Mommy I saw some shit Yeah, yeah, yeah, they see sh- they and and

Dude, we're touring schools man and like Try to get our kid in a good school and like in front of us. There's like, you know a line of these kids in front of us at one of these schools this teacher bends down gets in the face of a three-year-old And and like does like prison guard shit to the three of you will behave And then marches these poor kids to their to their classroom. It's like so you have like this combination of Parents who want to be good parents

This is probably mine me being very naive. I think that's generally what parents want But they can't they got they're working two three jobs So they got to fucking offload these kids to preschools and god knows where else and so So these kids are just getting bumpered around capitalism and that's the thing too It's like you can be the best parent in the world But at some point it's out of your control like you know what you can do everything you can But once you put them on that school bus man And then the other kids that weren't parented well will influence your kid and this and that and then you take them to the school

And they're not managed well and it's just like I mean man I God bless you so much for being a parent and a good parent and there's so many out there, but it's just I've I've kind of accepted the fact that I I know in my heart of hearts. I could be a good parent I just also know in my heart of hearts. I don't have the dedication to it because i'm too Self-involved right now Hold on

Yeah, but that's okay boy What are you doing in the fucking studio? Go give me a fucking cigar There's glass on the floor have mommy put bandages on your feet I told you to wear shoes Yeah, I love my kids and Um, you know

This is that what you're saying there. I this and I don't know if you really actually feel any kind of like non reproducing guilt, but I think this is Perfectly Fine and and really good like like Having kids is is like, you know it When it's time like it's it's It's very primordial like you your body you meet somebody Your pheromones match up in some way that you will never understand

And something clicks in your brain and you decide to have kids like they they did a study where They did genetic testing on like a group of dudes and a group of women and they took Matches they they basically like I'm sorry. They took the clothes the t-shirts these guys have been wearing their stinky ass shirts Put them in ziplock bags and had the women choose a mate based on the smell of their shirt. No

Yes, and like 90% or something of the women Picked the perfect genetic match just from the smell of the shirt and it's beautiful the ones Where it got fucked up where it got fucked up Is Apparently I think the women on birth control. Yes, I was gonna say There wasn't there a study about women on and off birth control with pheromones and smell

And it led to like divorce or some sort of like mismatch or something Because it affects your your sense and smell and and biology so much Watch out if your partner gets off birth control, which is probably not the worst decision They might just suddenly be like you smell like shit They they just they just will get they suddenly are just sexually disinterested in you Because they now their body is telling them do not reproduce with that motherfucker Like you are going to make some fucked up babies if you reproduce with that person And then they all this is happening like in the subbasement of your

Body like you don't know you're just all of a sudden you're like god I hate the way he holds their remote control, but really your your body is telling you you fucking reproduce with that guy You know, you're gonna make a fucking goblin. Don't do it. Yeah. Well, I I'll say when I'm So into someone and I'm in a relationship. I'm such a pheromone guy like I don't want them to wear deodorant I want to like sniff their armpits and they'll like put their nose in my ear And stuff or like I'll get done working out or riding my bike and they'll be like Well, don't don't go in the shower. Like smell is so important And it's so fucked up with birth control does to the female body and

With with hormones and changes and then you get off it and you have this whole new sense of smell and attraction And it's just again back to pharmaceuticals and and how it just Completely destroys humanity as it should naturally be, you know Yeah, man. I mean we it's just so many different Like Untraceable factors are mixed in with us at this point. Like we got You know, we're getting our dope. We're all dopamine addicts. Like we're all getting high on our phones. Yeah add to that you know

birth control mixed in with You know, I I I I believe in Telepathy I believe that they're everyone puts out some kind of I don't know pulse or or or whatever you want to call it quantum entanglement or some kind of general signal emanates from a person meaning that like the old model of meeting people at a bar at a restaurant at a club at a museum It you you what's happening there are all these like natural synchronistic

Patterns or convergences are happening and then you meet someone in this very normal natural way That I I know this Go ahead. I don't care. Make fun of everyone makes fun. I don't care. No. No. No. I'm listening I'm telling you the I'm wasn't talking to you. I was just in my mind I have a contingent of people on the internet who are like just Rolling their eyes vomiting. I I you know, like when you have kids you get this weird feeling like Did the kids have something to do with me meeting this person? Like how involved Was I in this situation? How much control did I have in this situation?

How much of of of this was just some souls wanting to come into the universe? Through this particular portal For it to deal with the karma that I'm going to like inevitably like pass on to them I don't know man, but you throw tender and grind or all the fucking electronic ways of meeting people and You're you're eliminating this huge 3d space that's used at the spatiality that was involved in reproduction. It's it's like everything's getting compressed to the screen And then what kind of kids are coming out of that?

Well, also, you know, I and and certainly I'm not the first one to say it but the the whole meeting online thing It's it's such a mind fucking terms of like, okay. When do we move? From the app to texting when did we move from texting to seeing each other and then just am I texting too much? I've heard of this thing called like a double text. You're not supposed to text two texts at once or like this or that And now there's this new thing where girls get the ick where if they see you like You know use your straw wrong. They're like, oh ick. I can't be with you and it's like what the fuck What is happening? And and there was something to be said about like distance even when you were living in a world where someone was

You know, maybe living in your same neighborhood or a 10 minute drive if you weren't constantly attached to them with the phone You still at that distance Which would make you look forward to seeing each other more But I find for me the phone makes things so hot and heavy so fast that it almost runs out of steam because everything is so accessible And it's listen to you you Chad. What you're a Chad. What's a Chad? You're like dude, I've seen you you've got like serious game like you're assuming like that's the normal Reality for most dudes like you've got like crazy mystical Game like I've seen you do that. I've seen it man. It's like

Yo, shut the fuck. Did I get out you? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to No, I don't know what you're talking about. Okay. Oh, I know you don't it's all a mystery Isn't it? I don't know I don't know how I do a triple back flip I get that funny. I get that funny feeling in my feet and then I'm flipping back Three times How did I how did I break that world record? I don't know It's a mystery. I guess it's just the mercury must not be in retrograde

You got people lining up to fuck you at shows Yeah, but I 99% of the time I don't do it because I'm at the point now where I just kind of want a connection And the the fleeting moment of coming is no longer Attractive to me. Don't get me wrong. Sometimes I'll do one time after show a girl came up to me and she goes You're such a weirdly attractive little man. Can I just smell you and I was like, okay And she smelled me and was like look I don't know what you're doing tonight, but I will do whatever you want. I was like, oh god

Wow, yeah, wow. Wow. Okay. Now. Let me tell you what you just did. So I I don't this I'm sure you've read the statistic Uh on the amount of single dudes out there right now It's horrifying like 70 for I think 70% or some massive percentage of guys are are single hopelessly single completely depressed completely frustrated What you just did Would be similar like if we were doing a podcast in a famine In a lake during a famine and I'm like, I don't want you to be eating You know it's worse than that worse than that. You're just like, you know, I'm just not in it to be full anymore

I'm a foodie now. I'm looking for like that special taco. I really just want a A gourmet sandwich. I just don't want by the way, man. I think it's great I hope I don't seem like I'm throwing shade. I like you deserve you deserve it. You're fucking hilarious. You're you're brilliant You're a sweet guy like why not but yeah, man I think that and and also I've been off the scene for Five years now. So I don't even know what's going on out there. Like I don't even know Any more

I I well, thank you. That was very kind of you I love love and like I want I want my heart to come. I'm tired of coming for my weiner. I want my heart to come and feel that feeling all the time and yeah, I But it is very hard to be in a relationship in terms of like I mean, dude, I'm only in the city for like three days a week. I'm on the road every weekend Which is wonderfully amazing, but it's just it's so hard to leave someone and to be away and not available And whatever whatever but I love love so much

I would love to be able to be like a matchmaker and try to help guys come out of that depression and help them Find someone and help women find someone that would like love them and support them like I love Love and I love when my friends Find people and they're they I can see their relationship blossom and I love When like you you're in such a love relationship and and that love is building through other human like that That makes my heart smile so much and I I hope for that for me one day But I think for now I've kind of resigned myself to the fact that I'm just uh

going to have to In enjoy and embrace my solitude rather than my loneliness, but I would like like if I get approached after a show I would be like, you know, that's very kind Maybe but why don't we find you a guy here that you know We can dish about and and I'll help you to be happy, you know Yeah, yeah, why don't we find a guy here to watch us fuck? Let's find a really not for you and me I've turned into a Victorian woman of like, I don't know sir, please. I'll tell you

Get to know me. That's very No, that's very that's very sweet. You know, you will they're out they're out there, man It's like you will find them like and you do as a comic you you have to find somebody who is capable of Not being so attached to you that they can't deal with the fact that you're you're a traveling person and when you find that person then You know, it's great. It's it's like you it's great because you know, this is another thing that gets left out

uh And I the romantic love thing is Is is that that's the It's the one of the main reasons to be alive probably but I'd do that When you manage somehow in this insane universe to And and with your neurotic Programming at least my neurotic programming totally talk. I know you're open about your you manage to find somebody

and work through all that shit And like accomplish harmony with that person Then it's like the value Of having someone in your life who like Where you're both helping each other Yeah With all the little shit you're all just the shit you're doing yourself right now or suddenly someone is like, you know like erin She will not let me cancel a fucking show like if if i'm feeling lazy

Which is very common for me. I'm getting that like you know that thing where you're looking at your phone and you're thinking man It's not that important. Yeah, they have other comics. He'll go up. Yeah, she will be like no No, you're going to go good. I need that. You're too brilliantly good to just silence yourself because you're a fat lazy piece of shit He says shit get the fuck out there you motherfucker. I need another refrigerator Well, you know, I will say you know talking about the cosmically connected and finding that Partner and love relationship, you know, and I've talked about this before and you know it is that around this time of year I always get kind of My in may it'll be 30 years since my dad died

So this this time of year is very uh You know and also I've outlived him. I'm older now than he was when he died So it's like kind of heavy on my mind a lot, but Wow, you know the the idea of like love and and cosmic relation I I think I've told you before years ago. I found Old journals of his when he was like 24 25 yeah He would write in his journal there

There were all these entries there after day and for the date He would write like December 3rd and then it would be crossed out and it would say November 3rd and and he did that like five Times and then after a while he went I don't know why I keep writing December Something magical must be happening in that month. I'll keep my heart my eyes open to it But the month of December is calling me And uh, he met my mom in December Wow And for some reason the whole month of november he kept writing the date as December and he recognized something was

Wow was coming and then he would call my mom his moon woman because he said when he when he spent time with her He felt like he had known her for many moons. So Wow Dad was really romantic. Yeah, that's so cool. Yeah, so beautiful. You know the so Talking about dead parents, uh, so So A few weeks ago I got weird and you know, it's somebody would like to press gets depression and shit sometimes and like, you know

I'm pretty attuned to the warning signs. I try to be at least and like But in a lot of times I could just make sense of why like it's it's inevitably my own fault. I'm staying up too late I'm not exercising. I'm not taking vitamins. I'm not doing whatever But this one I I I couldn't identify it and I'm acting like I'll grumpy and shit and Aaron is like What is going on with you? Like what is happening? And I'm like, I don't know. I'm sorry. I just I got a guy I just I'm gonna have to spend some time by myself and like figured out Anyway, I'll all of a sudden I'm like, when did my mom die? Google it I had to google when my mom died

It was that day And like yeah, and then I talked to my friends as a psychiatrist. He's like, oh, yeah That's a whole thing like seasonal triggers with grief and some people They don't realize that happens. They're just all of a sudden they're all pissed and like angry and neuratic and It's because they you know the moment I connected it because like I'd been for like a few nights. I'd been like Laying in bed about to fall asleep and like, why do I want to sob? I feel like I'm about to start crying What the fuck is happening to me? It was really a nerving man But that's grief is so weird. So I get what you're saying is we get closer to when you're when you lost your dad

Because yeah, all the triggers the spring. Yeah, all these things the smells everything is like Bringing you back to that. Yeah, and and I was I I went back to visit my mom And it's the same house we've been in, you know, and and it's you know, it's been me and her for like 80 years 80 years since I was eight for like 30 years and I was sitting on the front step and I was smoking a cigarette the sun was going down We had just eaten dinner and I'm like man, my dad used to do this He would sit outside have his after-dinner cigarette and I'm like I'm standing in the same steps

I'm older than him. This is like a very I'm at the same house. It's like a very surreal moment, you know And there's there's beauty in that but also at the same time, you know, you saying that kind of makes me realize Man, I've been in this wavy funk lately and I have to recognize A it just happens B There are legitimate things and I would always be I could spend so long get over it get over it and and I've made so much progress but at the same time I am allowed to To let it not affect me but kind of have waves of it and not get mad at myself for it

But that's so interesting that I mean, how long has it been since your mother died 2013 yeah I mean in a way That's almost beautiful that it's not weighing you down so much as to be dreading the day Letting the date affect you like I had a beautiful. Oh, no, it's not healthy like that. It's not healthy like that It's like me not wanting to remember it's there's nothing healthy of it Yeah, no, I wish it was like a no, there's nothing really enlightened or spiritual about my relationship with that grief. It's still fucked up

Well, there goes my theory. I was trying to It was I wish it was sweet. Listen. I wanted to be I I would apply. I mean I wanted to be like, oh, yes Yeah, that's probably why that's because it's your mom's dad's only a baby minds on minds An old almost going to get a retirement check 30 years. Come on now Oh, come on. There's no time and grief time the time space continuum does not work with fucking grief Unfortunately, there's no time It doesn't seem to be based in they say time heals all wounds. But guess what pal their clocks must be broken Yeah, fuck you. Fuck you riverside. Fuck you ozympic

So, you know, man, the thing is you What I realized after this last bout with it is It's like, okay You can't see anymore I had the perfect zit on my cheek. Okay, but it was like I could feel it was like a cyst I knew if I popped it it would be the most glorious explosion of pus

But I couldn't it was right. It was a little too deep to get out So like I went meth head man. I was like trying to get in there. I just I It was obsessively like I want this fucking thing to pop, you know, it's it's my subconscious It's all my repressed everything just get it out and and and so anyway Like the when when grief comes to the surface is no different and like the worst thing you can do is Not Not let it express itself through you because it is held in your body, man It is held and and when you expel it, it's not just like you feel better than

But you're like so like I my I used to have back problems Like the more shit like that you get out of you physiologically The more like your body feels better because your your poor body is like holding all that stuff in it and and then when you Expunge it Which is why anytime the grief zit shows up Pop that shit like get it out. Let it let it explode That's Alan Watts

Yeah, well, you know the back holds so much stress and everything and like the last time I saw you In Austin a couple weeks ago My back and neck weren't so much pain. I I couldn't leave my bed And you you really helped me by by getting me that massage but my best friends also my doctor and we FaceTime and he got me on these like steroids and uh, you know, I'd be pro for and everything but I was incredibly stressed out. My mind was racing. You know, I had just gotten out of my relationship All this stuff was happening and it it just centered itself in my body, you know

Yeah, yeah, that's where the it's in there, man. It just gets in there. It's in there and and Anytime you get to have like a breakdown or like, you know, anytime you get to volcano that shit out It's such a good opportunity. It's so sad the people Hold that hold on to that stuff. It's you know, it's like I get it. It's embarrassing to weep It's embarrassing. You're so you have to you have to weeping is good You got to let yourself weep and shake and snot and ugly cry, you know ugly cry. Yeah, you got to do that I mean, you know, you're gonna get you're gonna get like emotional blue balls

And that shows up as like fizzy that can show up is like fizzy. Sorry, man. I told my kids not to fucking landscape You know how hard it is to find a toddler fucking leaf blower like they can't carry the full-size leaf blower so you got to get them this like It has bro leaf blower and they are loud because there's I'll tell you what'll make them carry You tell them use their fucking arm as an ashtray again, or I'll say Fucking better get to going on carrying that leaf blower. You know what we do black coffee We it's just black coffee. It's a dream for a parent. Are you

You get them fucking hyper caffeinated Get them out there doing yard work. They love it. Teach them to push themselves. I make them listen to David Goggins the I don't know if you know that is but hardcore athlete So yeah, it's all about pain the glory of pain of pushing yourself and they do great yard work, man They do great yard work I love it. I wish I had a yard in Yeah

I think the leaf blower is our cue to wrap this thing up You are the one of my favorite people to talk to you on a podcast, man I thank you so much for your time and And I can't wait for you to come to austin again. What are you coming back? That was so cool to see you It really was man, and and thank you I'm so glad I got to do the comedy mothership and do it with you and see run your hour and That was so fun. I I I'm gonna be back at the end of may. I'm opening for a tell at the comedy mothership. So Oh, you are okay. Good. Yeah. Yeah, so hopefully

Go ahead Hopefully we can get together and maybe do a little cookout again But uh, yes, you're the best man. I I love your beautiful mind and friendship talking to you On and off is uh, always such a pleasure of mine. So thank you duncan When in may I think the 30th and 31st You got any other shows to plug? Yeah, my podcast be any in with jordan

Uh comes out every wednesday on youtube and patreon.com slash b and e and pod And what a great podcast by the way, man. I you guys are in the algorithm. You you know what you just pop up randomly That's a good sign man. You're like in the algo We're having fun, man. I anytime you're in the city. I'll change everything around to have you on you You got to come down in our the Delaware den and and have some fun But yeah, I uh, I'm gonna be at comedy on state june 8th through 10th I got a bunch of tour dates coming up e and finance dot com for all my dates Hare Krishna. Thank you, Ian

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