Duncan Trussell Family Hour - 725: NASA 3I/ATLAS

Episode Date: November 24, 2025

TODAY IS THE DAY! THE DAY IS NOW! A THREE-EYED ATLAS BESTRIDES THE GLOBE ITSELF! We discuss the recent NASA press conference about a weird comet in space. Join us! You can learn more about 3I/ATLAS, including a timeline of its discovery up to the present, on NASA's site. The DTFH is going on break this week for Thanksgiving! Our next episode drops the first week of December. See you then! This episode is brought to you by: Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code DUNCAN, bet five bucks and get $200 in bonus bets if your bet wins! This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/duncan and get on your way to being your best self. Give your loved ones a unique keepsake you’ll all cherish for years—Storyworth Memoirs! Right now, save $10 or more during their Holiday sale when you go to Storyworth.com/Duncan!

What's up? What's up? Hello to you. Friends, hello. What a great day it is today. At last, the ear beatings are either going to get infinitely worse for everyone in my life or they're going to stop because today is the day, friends. At last, at last, NASA got around to release it. pictures of three-eye fucking Atlas.

And I can't even imagine if you could quantify the hours of ear beatings that people like me have been giving people all over the world. I watch the threads. It's insane. The number of people speculating about what this strange comet is. And I just, I don't even want to think about the hot tubs, man. I don't even want to think about the stoned hot tubs with some stinky fucking hippie talking about it's a spaceship or whatever it is. Because I know that's all I've been doing.

I've been doing it to my wife, been doing it to my kids. And this is it, man. NASA is going to release images of whatever this strange fucking thing is, the thing that Avi Loeb, astrophysicist, has been speculating, could be. some kind of technology. Now, many people, of course, the debunkers have come out in a kind of ear-beating battle. Two great forces meeting on the fields of battle on Reddit, just fighting it out. No matter what, a leaked picture, a picture that seems like it could be real, something Avi Loeb says, another strange anomaly detected from it, instantaneously, a heroic debunker will land in any thread, knowing full well what will happen if they push back against the narrative that this is an alien man, and they do it. So you got on one side the heroic debunkers, but then on the other side, you've got people like me, people who are idiots.

people like me who i'm not i don't think we're idiots we know something and what we know is that inevitably eventually probably some shit is going to come out of that beautiful abyss above us and it's not going to be meteor it's not going to be a comet we watch ancient aliens we love Graham Hancock. We fall asleep looking at petroglyphs, wondering how the fuck are there the same symbols on different continents etched into the earth inscribed in ancient temples. We think about go blecky, tech, whatever the fuck it's called. We speculate. We try to summon orbs. We watch those boring ass uap hearings and for us we think just maybe just maybe we won the terrestrial lottery and that lottery is you get to be here when one of the great ships is finally spotted in the sky it could

happen probably won't happen might have happened based on a lot of unverified leaks that I've read it could be anything the to bring everyone up to speed who might not be somehow has missed this story even though if you ask me it's the only fucking story to be paying attention to get your head out of that

Jeffrey Epstein bullshit who cares yeah they're gonna fucking release something they're going to redact everything it's going to be covered in black fucking lines it's not going to be anything but this thing see here's the issue now this thing is finally getting close enough to earth that just regular telescopes have started taking pictures of it and so this is at the very

least probably something of an embarrassment I guess to NASA because I'll look it up at a second there's a YouTube channel this guy lives in Texas lives right down the street. And he got some really good footage of Atlas. Now, I don't know if you guys saw that or not. Maybe you could find that while I'm yapping, Josh. Look up like, I don't know, man, astronomer in Texas. I'll help you find it. But it's an interesting thing. Here's the problem. The comet seems to have qualities that do not match what we've observed in other comets. I feel like pretty agreed upon on both sides of the aforementioned battle. The debunkers are like, yeah, okay, that doesn't mean anything.

It just might be something we haven't seen before. That's cool, in its own right. But the essence of the thing is it has what's known as an anti-tail. Now, comets usually are covered in like ice. They're covered in stuff that once it gets. into the heliosphere, it starts burning off. And as it burns off, that creates the beautiful comet tail that we all know about. But for some reason, this thing doesn't seem to have that tail, or the tail that it does have, is going out of the front, which doesn't make any sense.

All that being said, there's other anomalies related to what could be non-gravitational acceleration. it basically went behind the sun and the problem is it non-gravitational acceleration doesn't necessarily mean ion thrusters it could also mean it lost mass and then went faster and but apparently the acceleration doesn't match them i don't know this is where i just i skim at this point when i'm reading this stuff i just see anomaly and it's changed its color a few times it seems to be uh people are they're detecting cyanide in whatever the fuck is coming off of it which is something that theoretically you might detect if there was like something on it that was doing some kind of manufacturing making something we don't know is the main thing and the reason so many of us

on the non-debunker side of the battlefielder so up in arms is because NASA theory theoretically got images of this fucking thing and didn't release the images. Avi Loeb was like, you know, coming at them online. Like, just, like, you know, make me look like an asshole. Show me these images. NASA didn't release them. And so today is the day NASA apparently is going to show us some kind of shit. Now, my guess is that we are going to see a sky dragon.

That's what I think it is. beautiful sky dragon one of the dragons prophesized in the book of revelation this was prophesized the hope he's predicted it but also it's very possible that that's an old one man that's an ancient one and this josh what you're doing there is what i've been doing and so i am now familiar with all the bullshit ones and the real ones and i'll see if i could find you know what i think I know how to find the astronomers one, because I sent it, for some reason I sent it to my wife and just was thinking. Is I said?

No, he actually got the movement of the thing, which is pretty cool. Oh, so it's video. Well, yeah, it's a YouTube channel. And again, this guy lives, like, in Texas, and he's been doing, like, an astronomy channel forever. so he's not it's not like one of these new YouTube channels that just popped up and is his name Ray

oh yeah that's him Ray okay so let's let's give him credit so people can let's post a link to his channel so I'm not being a complete dick it's Ray's astrophotography and go give him a subscribe man

this is so this guy this sweet guy just got this I don't think that's a basic bitch telescope are you showing it right now

yeah I don't think that's a basic bitch telescope I don't I wouldn't

be able to operate that fucking thing it's a fairly advanced telescope

that he's got to run like all the images and stuff through his computer

you could just skip towards the end he basically shows the process he uses

to get the sort of animation so you can see it is this it yeah

don't play the sound I don't play the sound I don't, I mean, I don't care, maybe play the sound sure, why not? Give the fuck. Play the sound.

Let him fucking... Using is called Pix Insight. It's a very expensive program. It's only good for Astro for the Luffers and there's a bit of learning curve using this program. Do you think he's stoned? Now when I see this comet,

right? Yeah, a little bit. And if I... I'm very stoned. I would be. If I had that telescope, I'd never stop smoking me. The first picture is no good. It's not focused well.

So I'll start with the second one. Yeah. Okay, he's keeping ahead. It's cool because he's kind of showing what he's doing. But we don't, we don't. There's comet three. There it is. Look at that.

There it is. It spins and it doesn't have a fucking tail. I don't know. It looks to me like it is. circling, tumbling, and most asteroids and comets do that. When they are in the space, they either revolve around or tumble. Yeah, it looks like it's a giant rock, tumbling, circling, with all the comrade is going in the sky.

But no tale, not like a comet. So this is an interstellar comet This is my first interstellar object, by the way I never took pictures of this before So if you are new to this channel Please subscribe to my channel You are seeing Subscribe to him, you guys

The actual picture of I'll subscribe to him right now Not CGI, not artificial So what's crazy about this And this guy he got the best view of whatever the fuck this thing is and he did it before NASA released it. Now, you know, in the defense of NASA, they don't just, you know, they're not like us. You take a picture of some cool shit.

You put it on the gram right away. There's teams that look at it and analyze it and make sure that it's like, I don't know, make sure that it's like legit, I guess. but it's just it's not any one thing that's gotten all of us worked up into a froth it's a combination of things it's the anomalies which i'll go through and read some of them to you it's that NASA didn't release the images when they definitely had images probably because of the government shut down it's the um avi loeb fanning the flames of this and so yeah we we don't know you know you don't We don't know. That's the main thing.

And when you don't know, and you're like me, you project your deepest hopes and fears on it. Because really, the thing is, like, do we really want to be visited by a fucking mothership? You know what I mean? Like, is that real? Like, do we really want to deal with that? Do you, would you want to, you know, you don't know what it is, Josh. You don't want that thing to show up at your doorstep? Not at my doorstep, but that would be cool.

within my lifetime to have, you know, another species visit us. Well, I mean, yeah, it would be cool if they were nice. It'd be cool if they were like the Lyrians or whatever, I think, which one? They're the Lerians or the cats. The Nord, Nordics. Or if they were weak and we just fuck them up. Why would you want to fuck them up? Because they're weak.

Well, okay. I mean, fair enough. Yeah. Fair enough. You know, and that's why we don't get spaceships, Josh. Yeah, I know. That's why we don't get them, because people like you want to fuck them up. They were in the wrong hood.

Well, you know what? Maybe we're in the wrong fucking hood. It's called Third Planet from the fucking sun. This jacket is so stupid. People like it. I had to wear something. We're finally getting the three-eye Atlas picks, guys. But, you know, the main thing is in exactly 30 minutes.

probably millions of stoners are going to get incredibly disappointed and I want of them because I don't know I don't even know if like NASA already hasn't released the images why do they need to like who gives the fuck if they did detect a something anomalous then just and they think we shouldn't know about it then just don't release it they already did you know but maybe it is because it's getting close enough to earth that people are going to start getting video of it. I'm going to respond to some moments in the chat here. Swaf Peddle says, I wish I had crazy

jacket money. This jacket was 50 bucks, maybe 60. I mean, I know that's not exactly cheap, but I appreciate that you think this was an expensive jacket. It was not. It was not. I think it was 50 bucks which doesn't make sense to me it should be worth more than that to me sparkles but yeah Joe we are going to do the NASA live stream as soon as it comes up um where is it at right now Josh take a look at see if they're doing a pre-show maybe they're doing like a somebody's warming up for them no it says 33 minutes I have the notification on okay great great but yeah we don't the main thing

is we have no idea what it is, but it's just another moment of weirdness in an already incredibly weird period for humanity. That's all. It's just, you know, one of the things. And that you, you don't, you, I don't want to be in a cauldron of weird, but we all are. I mean, not only do we have NASA is about to show images of the, this thing, which is probably nothing except it is something. It's the second interstellar comet that we've detected, I believe, maybe the third. So that's by itself, it's fucking nuts. And the fact that we're going to be getting like images of a thing that came from who knows where, it could be billions of years old. Just that by itself is amazing. And that's kind of

one of the sad things, I think, which is why, like, astronomers, I think they do feel, I would. If I was an astrophysicist, a cosmologist, a space studying man, I don't know what you really call them. And, like, you realize, like, they are not excited about the fact that we have the technology to get images of something that is not from this galaxy, that is behaving. in ways we've never seen something behave before. That's not good enough for them. They want it to be a goddamn Klingon worship.

That's got to be frustrated. Because, like, you know what I mean? Like, scientists, they're, they've gotten to the sort of, I guess you could call it a kind of Western Enlightenment where they're already amazed by the situation as is. The situation as is is is amazing. they don't need it like they don't need another level of amazement it's our it's it's the whole thing by itself is miraculous and incredible so i have a lot of respect uh for them uh even though they are

probably censoring a lot of these images because they don't want us to know that uh we are part of a galactic confederation and that we have some kind of treaty with them that you know we're basically like cattle that gets sold to space which is why human trafficking Trafficking is the number one industry on the planet, I think. Will you look up as human trafficking, the number one industry in the planet, Josh? We're only a few weeks in, and the NBA season is already wild. stars are going off rookies are making noise

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That's code Duncan. Bet five bucks and get $200 in bonus bets if your bet wins in partnership with Draft Kings. The crown is yours. Gambling problem? Call 1-800 gambler in New York. Call 8778 Hope N. Or text Hope, NY, 467369 in Connecticut. Help is available.

for problem gambling, call 8887877 or visit ccg.org. Please play responsibly. On behalf of Pood Hill Casino and Resort, pass through of per wager tax may apply in Illinois. 21 plus agent eligibility varies by jurisdiction. It's void in Ontario. Restrictions apply. Bet. must win to receive bonus bets, which expire in seven days. Minimum odds required additional terms of D-K-N-G.C-O-slash-A-O-Limited-Time offer. Pretty sure it is. I can't wear this thing. It's too fucking hot. Oh, yeah, it's only, uh, it's only $236 billion a year. I like how has, wow, risen.

It's got, it's up. It's up, buy stocks in it. Even as the stock market crashes, the human trafficking market keeps going up and up and up. Why, I'll tell you why. Everybody thinks they're getting shipped off to different parts of the world, to islands. They're not. They're not. They're getting put in capsules and launched right.

to the fucking ships that are cloaked around their planet, our planet, but it's really theirs. They've owned this planet forever. We're just territory in the great imperial dynasties' vast star kingdom. And we have treaties. They give us their tech. We give them our ladies and our kids. We don't even ask. Ask me no questions.

I'll tell you no lies, Zargan. now give me that dothelium crystal cube and you can have this boy that's what they do that's what they do um for those of you just joining us uh this is we're about to do a a nasa's feed revealing three eye atlas images at last now let's pull up some of the bullshit images of three eye atlas i'll show you some josh i'll find them. Yeah, didn't China release them? Okay, so I'll show you one that's like, there is so much, I just want to say this,

and I really have no one, I honestly shouldn't talk, but some of y'all are not putting any kind of work in your fake-ass fuck of videos. You know, like, you got to do a little better. I don't know if you guys followed that dude who said he had. Essentially, like, there's this thing called the Bugas Fear, which is something. some kind of metallic sphere. This dude said he found a cylinder. It looks kind of like a tic-tac.

He faked a video of him drilling the fucking thing. Faked seeing an orb and a seizure. And people really bought it, which is shocking to me. Very little work was put into this, by the way. He must have been thrilled. But there's a lot of like bullshit images of three eye atlas. Is this real? I think that's real.

But the reason, you can pull that up. but the reason it looks like that is it's not like a centipede. It's just because that's a bunch of different pictures of it. Oh, okay. Like that dude animated the pictures together. You know, the best place to get all the, like, there's a subreddit dedicated to this damn thing now. Let me see.

If I could fight it. And I'll see if I can find the fake images. This one's from China, apparently. Yeah, pull that one up. It's a YouTube video. I mean, just pull the image up. Also, you know, the other thing is, because of these fucking debunkers, it's really hard to find misinformation.

And it's annoying. Let me find the bullshit. I know it's bullshit, but it's fun. But I understand, you know, after everybody fell for that, you just have to see it. It's some dude drilling into a fake-ass fucking tic-tac. And the amount of people who were like, we got to identify him, I hope he's okay.

It's really sad. So I kind of get it. Not everybody just instantly discounts everything like I do. I've got data nihilism. Like, I just assume it's probably not real and I'm going to be disappointed. but then I still enjoy it. Is that real? I don't know.

Okay, I'm sending you this one. Now, this is from Ray's astrophotography that we just watched. And somebody took a screenshot of somebody just enlarged what he took a picture of him. Again, did they adjust it? Did they change it? I don't know. But this looks like a fucking pinagram. You know, that looks like it's got some kind of like cohesive star-like shape.

I count one, two, three, five points glowing light in the middle. but it's some pixelated thing who knows who knows how if somebody just messed with it and if you maybe if you enlarge anything enough it starts taking on form that isn't there i don't know but um let me see if i could find the fit so let's see i think this is uh let me see here go to Reddit UFO for all the like all the like fake stuff and some real stuff I frequent it quite often

um a lot of orbs a lot of orbs you know oh here it is okay I'm going to send you this so this is the this was this is a leak and it's probably not real but people have been sort of matching this up with actual images of the thing and it sort of looks like it but that being said if you wanted to

like add some thrusters to a comet of course it's going to look like a comment I'll send this to you check this out did any of you guys in the chat go to skank fest this year it was so fun there you go okay yeah so this is the one

that's probably bullshit um I believe someone looked up Cassandra Oracle Argus and they're like there's no Cassandra Oracle Argus it looks like an AI generated it but this got my stoner this gave me a stoner boner

for a second but nah probably not real but wouldn't it be great if it was we're now 20 minutes away from potentially all of human history being changed forever as we see the first picture of an alien mothership we're about to show

the live stream of NASA unveiling images of 3i Atlas this could be it friends this could be it this could cause an entire global paradigm shift this could end all wars this could be the beginning of a of being ushered in to the galactic empire but more likely it's just a fucking big ass stupid rock that caught the monkey's attention flying through space just a sad lonely rock I wonder if I can find this while we wait. This is something I just thought of and I made a long time ago. What's the first thing you do if you do find out that it is aliens? What? What's the first thing that you do?

There's a lot of people I got to call and say, I told you so. A lot of people. Then after that, I forget about it. You know, it's just going to keep going. See, that's the other thing that's very possible. It just keeps going. going. It doesn't give a fuck. It's not like it's going to come back either. There's planets like ours all over the universe. And we just, it's just like, yeah, whatever. You know what I mean?

Like, kind of like when you're out in the woods and you see some nondescript, tick-covered deer, they're not doing great, emaciated. They're not like the beautiful deer. They're not like Bambi. He's just kind of shitty, flea-covered, tick-encrusted deer. You don't think about that ever again. They look at you like, Jesus, what the fuck is that? It's like a big foot for them. But to years, I don't give it fuck. Easily could be that. We think we're so special just because we don't know that there's other planets like ours. But it could just be we're like mid, if that. We're just like a mid planet. This shit happens all the time. Some like DNA figures out a way to start self-replicating and over time it turns into something that like it's stupid and boring

and can't get out of the gravity well and ends up destroying itself and it's just nothing it's like you know walk into Starbucks of my kid the other day you know you see a ant's nest very like amazing from the perspective of the ant towers chimneys rising up out of a crack in a sidewalk but you know my kid is like whoa an ant's nest can I knock it over I'm like no you're gonna get ants all over you

let's just get some coffee that could be it that could be the conversation happening on the mothership right now it's like wow look at that damn they really fucked up their planet wow that's weird it's so weird how these things don't realize

they can't get off the planet and they fuck it up every time well whatever who cares It's like the 50 million fucked up planet with dummies all over. Could be that. The New Age dream is narcissistic that the channelers you think that the Pleadians have communicated through humans to give us some divine message. Like they give a fuck. Like you see moss?

You're not like, wow, let me try to communicate to that moss about the stock market. You just don't think about it. You just keep moving. You see a tree. You're not like, oh, my God. If you do try to communicate with the tree, you're on mushrooms, and you can. Usually, it's kind of sad. But you don't think about it much after that.

Point is, like, we think we think we deserve to even be noticed. I don't know. It could just be that we're, like, kind of, we kind of suck. Like, there's nothing that special that we're doing, especially if this thing actually is some kind of massive mothership siphoning solar flares off the sun that was one of the weird things that happened

is like it was hit with like what three solar flares like just blasted it and we got hit with one too we got hit with one and we're fine oh my god my wife really like it was great because like I was like sitting her babe this is a serious thing man

it's really bad and then like she was trolling me so hard like Duncan did you hear the internet's down all over the world but the thing did get hit with three solar flares which is pretty insane massive solar flares hit this comet that has broken up a lot of other comets evaporated a lot of comets this thing's fucking fine it's another anomaly yeah i think you could even it absorbed an immense amount of energy from the sun, which may indicate it is, oh, the statement is based on calculations by physicist Avi Loeb suggested that three-eye Atlas absorbed an immense amount of energy from the sun,

which may indicate it's not a natural object. According to his analysis, the amount of energy absorbed required an absorbing area much larger than expected for a natural comet, and the observed anti-tail also pointed towards the sun rather than away, which is unusual for a comet. So, just from his perspective like if this whatever this thing is is so advanced that it can trigger

solar flares like that's how it fuels itself it just finds a star gets the star to burp out shit at it that can't be real right I don't know probably not want it to be looks cool man little tower or something I mean there is that video

I'll find it to you and send it one of my favorite I love watching sun videos by the way just watching plasma erupt from the sun is fucking cool seems like it's alive but let me see if I can find this for you and it was on the opposite side of the sun

when it absorbed it right what's that it was on the opposite side of the sun I was about to say the dark side of the sun the dark side of the sun But the point being, if something's so advanced that it can trigger solar flares and just absorb energy from the sun, it is hubris to think it gives a fuck about us. Because if something is that advanced, any technological accomplishment we've achieved on the planet is dwarfed by that. It's like, you know what I mean?

Like, I'm sure people were, like, really excited when they figured out how to, like, throw rocks with a sling. Like, that was a big, terrible moment for a lot of people. And they were, like, whoa, this is fucking advanced. Like, we used to just have to throw the rock and hit people. But if you put it, I don't know, if you put it in, like, dried skin, you can make it go fast. holy shit we can't reveal this to people this is going to get a lot of people killed they deserve to know so from the perspective of some advanced intelligence we might be like that just like oh wow they've like figured out how to sort of create like a some kind of something they call artificial

intelligence, which is probably hilarious for an advanced species that we are calling anything intelligent, that we based on us. And that's a good question. Someone in the chat said, what, turn that shit off, whatever it is. Oh, come on. Give me a break. This is the video sent. But keep playing.

That's hilarious. See, oh wait, here we go. I don't even know if this is the right video, but just look at the sun, man. Even minus any of the shit. It's so, it's so beautiful, man. Just floating up there, big cheeseball. I don't know if this is it. If you guys knew how many of these fucking videos I get clickbaited into,

you and night you would probably not be watching me all right forget it 12 minutes and 47 seconds away from potentially seeing an alien mothership 12 minutes away from not being able to look at our species the same what, 12 minutes away from so many phone calls to debunkers 12 minutes away more likely 12 minutes away from abject and profound disappointment

is we realize yet again we are just Gilligan's fucking island out here Gilligan's island just stuck out in the middle of fucking nowhere you know with a few oligarchs sort of trying to get off the planet barely like not even put i mean you know like relative to like

what we could be doing which is the entire planet could figure out a way to commune together and probably we could become a galactic space faring civilization we're barely trying just a a few mad scientists who are like they're also like getting like the billion trillion dollar bonuses so when you're asking like what's the aliens consciousness like well i could tell you the consciousness of the people who are trying to get off the fucking planet is fascinating uh you know from the perspective of like all the things you you could be doing and it's really kind of ominous isn't it you know like you would think you would think like the sort of the logical conclusion one might draw being stuck on a planet with a bunch of other

super advanced monkey descendants would be like okay guys this blowing each other up thing maybe uh maybe we shouldn't do that and we should just use the money we're using to blow each other up to to see if we can get off this planet that has been hit by meteors so many times gone through multiple massive catastrophes many of which were uncertain of what caused them so you know the good news is we're all going to get blown up meaning that we don't really have to try to blow each other up right now because space is going to do that for us so we're all going to get incinerated probably our descendants will so now that we know we have all lost from the sort of cosmic perspective if losing means getting blown up, then we could just sort of maybe work together, and we could do that.

But no, that's not what's happening. What's happening is fucking Katie Perry is getting shot up in a tin can. That's it. That's it. And they act like they invented a fucking time machine. It's cool. Don't get me wrong, man. I'm not trying to be a defeatist.

I love that we can land the rockets again. that's really cool the space dick goes up and now the space dick can come back down so we've got a thrust pattern happening as we try to impregnate space with our DNA where it's the beginning thrusts or the space dicks and so maybe maybe we can get like find a nice hole in the moon or something that we can it's got some shade that isn't getting blasted by the sun and we can build like a little geodesic sort of hotel but we're not going there you know they're they're going to go there no unless you're an oligarch the odds of you getting to go to some geodesic space paradise and a crater in the moon are fairly slim unless you're like

getting trafficked so you know what I mean imagine a fucking Epstein had a goddamn crater up there that he could fly a ship to you're like dude epstein planet epstein crater oh instead of an island just some crater up on the moon that like you i don't you did we even break the law i live on the moon now oh that's true yeah you know what i mean and then and then on top and then you're just epstein was into like some kind of like transhumanist breeding program did you know that you wanted to like he wanted to spread his DNA for some reason so i mean not that hard to get a little like breeding area of your moon crater fuck fuck world and just grow your own humans to bang down did he have kids no no no he didn't have kids you would think he had

kids yeah because he loved kids so much but this is the this is the this is the reality of it all who knows we are now

how close are we Josh like six minutes six minutes away let's go ahead and pull it up seven seven minutes away pull it up can you overlay my dumb ass on top of

that? Can they see both? No. It's important. We gotta get better streaming software. Well, I can do this. No, you're in the corner. What? I'm, where?

Oh yeah, I'm still here. I! Here we go, guys. Look at this. We've got... Countdown. Do you watch Doctor Who? No, not really. I wonder why it's recommending Doctor Who to you. I've been watching a lot of, like, clips of different shows, so that's probably why.

You've been watching Doctor Who clips? No, not Dr. Who clips, but... Then why is that up? Why are you getting weird about it? Oh, I'm not getting weird. Are you embarrassed that you like Doctor Who? Nothing wrong with that. No.

You know what it was? I was watching Marvel's... What's that guy's name? The one that's like... Don't act like you don't love Doctor Who? You love Doctor... Doctor Strange. That's who I was watching.

Oh, so it was like, oh, he just likes... Yeah. sci-fi doctors yeah i don't know i people make fun of me because my favorite marvel character is dr strange here we go we're now five minutes and fifty three seconds away from potentially getting our brains melted as nasa reveals this fucking thing is the most is a celestial ship it's where we go on ketamine and it's here and not there was a like it's that would be amazing if we realize this because ketamine's getting so popular that drew it to us this could be the thing mckenna contacted via mushrooms but it's probably just

another boring ass fucking thing that our brains got stuck to two more weeks man two more weeks So he's two more weeks before something cool happens. Nothing ever happens. I mean, I don't want to seem like a defeatist, but honestly. What have you just enjoyed the anticipation? I love being edged. But I, you know, the anticipation is like many people I've been ear beating, specifically my wife and my son

telling me she's sadly shaking her head. That's what I'm anticipating. Damn, it's like Vincent Van Gogh visits the gallery. But you can't see it. It's so brilliant that thumbnail. It asks a question. Is his ear intact?

No, you don't see it on the other side. what do you mean well because his ears kind of poke out and you don't really see the ear on this side yeah but it's like it could be there could be smashed back or something why was that considered romantic then no never was oh okay there's there was there's never a time there was never a period in time where people were like oh you sent me an ear mother he must love you Yeah. No, Vince Van Gogh was manic-depressive. He just went nuts and sent his fucking ear, like, cut his ear off and sent it to somebody who was probably, like, so sick of his shit.

You'd think he tried other body parts first and was like, no, this isn't good enough? If he did, he's even more of a psycho. Yeah. You mean, like, he cut off, like, a pinky or something. It's like, ugh, that's not romantic. Yeah. I think he started with some, like, beard hair. toenails

toenails stuff like that like that's just anybody can do that we are three minutes and ten seconds do you have a charger I could use Josh yes

three minutes and ten seconds away friends from what could be the beginning of the beginning or the beginning

of the end they really slept on this too didn't they it's kind of annoying they got to do like a build

up to a live stream too Isn't that annoying that somebody would do that And build up That'd be cool if they did like a Kill Tony version And just like had all these Different comments and What do you mean, Josh?

I'm saying Kill Tony's popular And if they want the stream to be popular You're saying that NASA should start imitating Kill Tony Why not? Dude wouldn't surprise me Here we go guys I'm going into the chat

I'm sure you guys are incredibly excited right now as am I I mean it's not too crazy I think you had a what's his name go on there and bomb and then like totally ruined running for president who the guy what is it RFK

RFK bombed on kill Tony yeah he was on kill Tony a long time ago that's fucking and he kept going with his minute it sounded like he was bombing because his voice does this the whole time He sounds like he's like just took a bomb grip. Yeah, and his wife came out and was like, that's enough, we're good, that's enough. His wife came out on stage behind him.

It's like, we're good. Oh, my God. Oh, you are fucked. Like, you're, like, that is unprecedented bombing. Yeah. I've got to refresh my feet here. Here we go. wait

am I down or is our feet down? No just me sure yeah we're still up we got one minute that'd be crazy

if it went down right at this point one minute gang one minute to just the greatest moment in human history and I'm so excited

to be sharing this moment with you my dear DTFH friends like subscribe hopefully here we go This episode. This episode is sponsored by Better Help. Shorter days are here, friends.

And that's what I call the sad times. I don't know what it is. Whenever the season changes like this, boy does my meat gyroscope get a little wobbly maybe you're like that a lot of people are just something about the something's wrong planet why is it doing that why is the sun doing that why can't we just stay in one spot well because we the planet would incinerate on whatever side was facing the sun probably i'm not really sure but i'm sure it'd be terrible we're lucky things work the way they do but for some reason some people get a little dismal in the holidays

You think putting lights on trees came from anything other than someone so bedraggled and bummed out. They were like, you know what? Just put some lights on a tree, man. Maybe that'll cheer me up. This is why we have DeWali. Christmas, people get bummed. And maybe some people in your life are feeling a little bum. So it's a good time to call people and just check in.

Say, hey, how you doing? Are you feeling like you've been? making out with a litch too. You don't have to say that, but, you know, you could also say, I love you, grandmother. If you're feeling bummed out and you're noticing you always get bummed out around this time each year, why not give therapy a try with better help? Better help has quality therapists that work according to a strict code of conduct and are fully licensed in the U.S. even better.

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That's BetterH-E-L-P.com slash Duncan. This show is sponsored by Better Help. There's like they're starting. There you go. Live events start soon. Oh, they're pulling on a dunk in. Here we go! And welcome to NASA's Goddard

Space Flight Center. We are live today with NASA experts who are excited to share the latest images we have of the interstellar comet 3-I Atlas. 3-I means third interstellar and Atlas refers to the NASA-funded Atlas Survey Telescope, which made

the discovery. We are joined today by Ameshethae by NASA's associate administrator. Mickey Fox, Associate Administrator for NASA's Science Mission Directorate. They don't look like they saw a mothership. John Donald Goldman, director for the Astrophysics Division. And Tom Stattler, lead scientist for solar system small bodies in the planetary science division. We'll be taking questions from the media on the phone bridge and through social media.

The phone bridge. Let's learn more about this fascinating comment and share some images. You mean the phone? Hi, everyone. America leads the way in space exploration. As Courtney noted, a NASA-funded telescope, the Atlas Survey Telescope in Chile, first reported observations of the comet on July 1st, 2025 to the Minor Planet Center. And NASA has been tracking and studying comet 3-I Atlas ever since.

We're here today to give you the latest of what we know about comet 3-I Atlas and what we still want to know. But first, what is a comet? Fuck, yeah, you father-fug. C, C, crazy. Oh, overhead. M. To start with, I'd like to address the rumors right at the beginning. I think it's important that we talk about that.

This object is a comet. It looks and behaves like a comet and all evidence points to it being a comet. All right. But this one came from outside the solar system. No, keep playing. I'm joking. Which makes it fascinating, exciting, and scientifically very important. This is only the third interstellar object like this that humanity has ever found. A little bit more about the rumors.

I think it's very important, and I'm actually very excited that a lot of the world was speculating about. Avi Loeb. NASA was in a period where we couldn't speak about it due to the recent government shutdown. I think what I took away from NASA... Putting the belt around his neck. Watching that as we were working during the shutdown was just how interested and how excited people were about the possibility of what this comic could be. And we could have released the images at any time. But what I think is really awesome is that folks were interested in this incredible finding that we observed and that we have that came from the heavens and what that means, what it could mean about how magical the universe could be.

It expanded people's brains to think about how magical the universe could be. And I'll tell you here at NASA, we think that every day. And so it's really great that you were able to join us while we were, you know, not able to comment because of the shutdown constraints about what that comment is. because we think the universe is a magical place and we spend your treasure and we spend all of our time trying to make sure that we explore that and share with you as much as we can. In fact, we want very much to find signs of life in the universe. In fact, just a few months ago, we were with you and we talked about what we think might be the signal from ancient life on the surface of Mars from our amazing machines that have been roving the planet for 30 years to look for those things. that that is something that's really important for us to to learn about and discover it could be an amazing discovery if and when we can confirm that but three-eye atlas and you guys

didn't give a shit about that so my colleague at all the science mission director one of the greatest discoveries ever you guys just to give you a peek here's one of the images from the closest physical instrument we had to the comet that's it instrument on our mars or condensance orbiter taken on october 2nd as the comet sailed by at a distance of 19 million miles from the instrument. You can see that comet through the Atlas looks like a fuzzy white ball. That ball is a cloud of dust and ice called the coma, which is shed by the comet as it continues its trajectory towards the sun. I'll leave it to my esteemed colleagues to share further details. That's what we got!

There's a photo. NASA science, Nikki Foxx. Thank you so much. It is such a rare opportunity for us to be able to observe this interstellar comet. They did a countdown for this. given this really, really exciting opportunity to do it. It looks like, it looks like just like someone's shining a flashlight and a fogged-up car. Yeah. Comets are tiny cosmic snowballs.

And by studying them, we can learn about the environment from, you know, basically where they formed, where they came from. This one came from a different environment from our own. And so we're already starting to see some really interesting differences to comets from our own solar system. Okay. The anomalies. Three-I Atlas, as you heard, is the third known interstellar object to part. through our solar system, the first one being identified in 2017. Look, they're already doing it.

See, it's just a comet. God, we're going to... This is a great loss for many of us. ...with our network of Earth-based telescopes, which are designed to find small, fast-moving objects in space. The NASA-funded Atlas Survey Telescope, which made the discovery, is part of NASA's planetary defense network. Our telescopes are always watching this.

skies to keep us safe, and in doing so, they occasionally make major scientifically interesting discoveries, just like this one. Right away, of course, NASA's Planetary Defense Coordination Office established, they studied it, and they established the 3-Ey Atlas is not a danger to Earth. In fact, it's at least twice as far away as the distance between the Earth and our Sun. On October 30th, the comet itself reached the closest it will ever be to the sun when it crossed just inside Mars's orbit, which is why the image that Omit just showed, he noted it was the closest instrument physically to the comet,

because the comet was right inside the orbit of Mars. Earth was on the opposite side of the sun, which is about as far away as our planet can possibly be from Mars. It's been clear from the moment of discovery that the comet was going to pass on the opposite side of the sun from where the Earth is. However, it was also clear that its positioning behind the sun

was going to make observations from Earth very, very difficult. And that is why we are so happy to have our incredible fleet of NASA Science Spacecraft Please tell me it's not just that white image. You can't just be that. That was the best one.

Is that what they said? They give you a sneak peek. That's going to be the best one. The unique capability to observe three-eye Atlas almost the entire time it passes through our celestial neighborhood. Everything NASA science does is interconnected. And only 20 mission teams have been working together to really rise to this challenge. 20 mission teams, by the way, and counting.

Everything we're learning about the comet is possible because of the distribution of all of the different instruments on our spacecraft with different capabilities. Kind of looks like you're on the TV in the background. For some of them, we've even pushed our scientists. They're watching the DTFH. things that they were designed to achieve to allow us to capture this amazing glimpse at this interstellar traveler. In other words, we can study this comet so well because we have many different assets in different locations, observing things in different wavelengths, in different ways. This is a problem. Scientists, they need an intermediary.

Is that the idea just bore people? The NASA science team has kept watch on three-eye Atlas for nearly its entire journey through the solar system for the first time ever. So I'll just quickly go through the timeline of which NASA spacecraft have observed the comet thus far. Do you guys want to keep watching this shit? There will be more opportunities

to observe this comet as it continues its journey through the solar system, passing the orbit of Jupiter in spring of 2026. No. Next. All right, cut it off. No, no, no, turn her off.

Turn it off. God damn it. But did you enjoy the anticipation, though? Don't ever say that to me. You know, man, I don't know why. It's not their fault. But it's the same thing with, like, the UFO hearings. I don't know why that method of dispensing information

fills me with such disdain it shouldn't but it does it really is the most annoying thing like you know I don't know if it's like just like you know disappointment would have been fucking cool if those people sitting there hadn't been like you know fine If, like, they were smoking cigarettes. Then you know you're fucked. If they're, like, smoking cigarettes. One of them's listening to headphones. But it, you know what, Mr. Watson?

I think you got a great point. Today, we learned that NASA has a fucking phone bridge. And, like, I have more questions about the phone bridge than I have about the comet. What the fuck is a phone bridge? Like, did that? Someone wrote that. They're like, you can't just say phone or NASA. Like, it's got to sound like way more futuristic than we'll take questions from journalists on the phone. So they had to add bridge to it. And then, you know, my, my paranoid ass, just that alone is a red flag, isn't it?

Like, if you're at dinner with somebody and their phone rings, they're like, oh, hold on, important call on my phone bridge. you're you're going to be you're not what to get you're going to have a lot of questions and you're going to feel like something's wrong with them so why are they why did they say phone bridge

someone needs to look into this the font is weird for wherever they are and where are they why are they in that weird little room why you know it's probably just me

it's not there for these are scientists they didn't want to be in the spotlight They want to look through telescopes and do equations. They don't need stoners. We can share this information with the world, including... Still, just show the fucking shit! Why not show it and then follow it up with the condescending stuff? Play it again. I want to get angry again.

Science community and our partners across the planet that often have ground-based assets or other spaces. assets or other space-based assets so that they can conduct additional observations with their telescopes. In this case, our astrophysics missions came together to take advantage of this rare opportunity to study this comet that came to us from outside the surface. Oh, God, it's annoying. On flagship space telescopes to smaller missions like Tess and Swift, they all have, as Nikki said, different complementary capabilities. I feel bad for them. You know what it is? They need they do things that even they feel like they're going to get defunded so they got to like pat

themselves in the back and talk about how important they are everybody knows they're important that's all they're not this is a thing like these are not they're not meant to be dispensing information they don't understand I should be they should have given it to me should be my job ambassador to NASA because I, if I had to rewrite that thing, I'm like, dude, show the fucking pictures, laugh at the stoners, maybe show a fake picture at first, and then be like, just kidding, it's just a fucking space rock, you dumb asses. We think we might have found proof there was life on Mars, you fucking assholes. But just because a comet acts sort of weird, that's,

That's all you guys care about. Clayton, you didn't miss anything. Clayton Roberts, I'll tell you exactly what they said. They said, blah, blah, blah, we're nerds. We're nerds! They described what a comet was. They talked about how they've been tracking it the whole time. They talked about the government shutdown made it so they couldn't talk about the comet.

It wasn't a conspiracy. And then they showed... showed a white dot that it looked like someone was shining a flashlight in like a fogged up window that's what we got pretty much the very like if somebody wrote the worst script designed to antagonize disappoint and frustrate stoners that's what this is go back to it let's just watch I just want to say before, I knew this was going to happen. Shut up, man. How dare you say that?

That's why I wore my NASA shirt today. Ah, I'm going to put on my space jacket anyway. I knew this is going to happen. There's still aliens. God damn it. What's the ratio of carbon dioxide to water? And we now know that. We know it's larger than what we usually see in solar system objects.

But there's a lot of natural explanations for that. For one, the carbon dioxide is going to kind of bake. off that comet earlier on when it's far away. But there's other well-understood processes that could also explain it. I'll just to put this in context, there are, every time we look beyond our solar system and we look at the ratios of carbon dioxide to water, we see whether it's a star or a planet, different ratios than we see in the solar system, and that's true for this comet as well. So it could mean, and this is the last theory of why those ratios could be different, that

Ices could have been exposed to higher levels of radiation than comets in our own system. It's a mystery. Or as I said before, it could be that the comet just formed from a region where carbon dioxide ice was particularly abundant and different from our solar system. Other missions like our Swift spacecraft, which studies x-rays and gamma rays, have also observed the comet. Teams even look back through data from our test mission, which was designed to look at exoplanets, and found observations of the comet as early as May.

information is helping us understand the comments history we'll take a break close up the moon landing footage got to remember these are the same people that did showed us this just a break we'll cut back to it here we go here we go Show them running. Show them running on the moon. Let's skip ahead a little bit. There you go, there, the buggy. Show the buggy.

It's running, John. Okay, good. You got all your steering, it's great. Totally real. Totally real. Totally real. Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-do. Yup-di hopping along.

One. Show them hopping again. And then show this thing to take off. Why would you think that's not real? Why would anyone question that? question that we went to another place and said hippity hop show the but no show it take it show the rocket take off go to the very end I don't know just float it up like that's I don't know it just floated up like that I thought there was like that's how they

that's how it works That's how it works, what? Not a lot of gravity, just went right up. It would be possible with our assets. I can't emphasize enough now how, thanks to the cooperation of so many mission teams, we will be accumulating a wealth of data on this comet that the science community will be digging into for years. Now, let's go back to... Do not stare into the Necronomicon.

And I can show you a sampling of the images collected by our different mission teams. Here we go, guys. This is it. In the context, you're going to see a comet. that's a small body with a coma around it, basically a fuzzy blob. Now remember, space is big. Oh, it is. Thank you. Guys, remember, space is bigger than your apartment.

It's a little bit as if our NASA spacecraft were at a baseball game, watching the game from different places. They think we're just idiots. Everybody's got a camera, and they're trying to a picture of the ball, and nobody has a perfect view, and everybody has a different camera. Now, let's return to September and see the first images from the site. spacecraft. NASA's Psyche mission acquired four broadband black and white images of the comet over

the course of eight hours on September 8th and 9th, 2025. The comet was about 33 million miles from the spacecraft at that time, and you can see in the image the large frame where the comet was seen at different times. Down in the bottom left is a blow-up, a stack in addition, of all of those observations. The Psyche spacecraft is on its way to an asteroid in the main asteroid belt that's also named Psyche. And these images were the first captured from this perspective. Now, if you think in that lower left, you're not seeing very much, just wait a minute, you'll see more. Great.

Now, the following week in September, the Lucy spacecraft observed the comet from the opposite direction. So let's take a look at the Lucy image. This is another broadband black and white image made by adding up a series of, of individual exposures that were taken on September 16th. Lucy is on its way to study asteroids that shared Jupiter's orbit around the sun called the Trojan asteroids. Look at him three. Look at the chat.

Liars misspelled. He copy and paid. Everyone's so pissed. I hope they can't see the chat. They can see the chat. They can see the chat. to the right of the comet. If you were the Lucy spacecraft looking at the comet from this angle,

the sun would be a little bit over your left shoulder. Is there a way to show the moon thing and keep the audio for this going? There's no way to do that. Show the moon thing. Maybe just show that. For scale, this image spans about one third the width of the full moon as you'd see it on the sky. Of course, at the distance of the comet, that's a much, much larger region of space than the moon. Now, this looks a little different from the psyche image.

Part of that is because the cameras are different, and part is because... Just jump them dancing on the moon. ...decided to show their images. But also, it's because we're seeing the comet from different directions. Seeing a comet's coma in different lighting geometries, with the sun coming from different directions, is one of the key ways to learn about the physical properties of the dust that's been launched off in service.

And I want to emphasize that you do not get these views unless you have spacecraft farther from the sun than the comet is so that you can see it backlit. We could not get this. Bye-bye! People writing on the commas are like, so they just left the cameraman? Play it and get go back, yeah. They're like, fuck you, Stanley Kubrick.

Better understand both the three-dimensional structure of the comet and the nature of the dust. It's a rare opportunity to compare ancient dust from a distant solar system to that. It's like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory when they go up in that thing. And you can never do that again. You can never do that again. That's why we haven't done it.

You could only do that once. At the beginning of October, 3-I Atlas passed within 20 million miles of Mars, which gave our Mars spacecraft an opportunity for a close-up. And earlier, you saw the image that Ahmed shared from our Mars reconnaissance orbiter. Maven is another Mars orbiter that has been studied on a Martian atmosphere since 2014.

Now, this picture is not a direct picture of the comet itself. It's a spectrum. You're seeing the science wiggles. Oh, the science wiggles. You dumb piece of shit. Those are science wigglers. You dumbass! You stupid fuck, it's a wiggle.

You imagine saying that as a professor. And here you can see the science wiggles. There's science wiggles. Come over later, I'll give you some science. Tickles. indicating that's coming from hydrogen gas in interplanetary space. And on the left, that blob is the signature of hydrogen gas coming from comet 3i Atlas. It's a little blob rather than...

Interplanetary hydrogen. Because the comet is a small object in the sky relative to great big gigantic Mars and interstellar space that fills the entire field of the instrument. That definitely tells us, first of all, that the comet is there. If there were no comet, there would be no... You wouldn't see anything. A little blob on the left side of the image, but it's also telling us it's one of the many ways that we're able to discern the chemical composition of three-eye Atlas.

And in this particular example, it's showing us the high-frey gas. It's not as false. No one should be mad at them. They're just scientists. But it's so infuriating. Now, Levin's observations combined with the earlier observations by Swift and Webb that Sean spoke about, will help determine the water production rate. How much water vapor is released from the comet?

when the comet is worn by the sun, which provides insight into information. Shut it off. And it's journey through our galaxy. Ugh. Why is it just me, guys? Like, why is that? I'm not, obviously, we'd love it to be UFO. But there's something else that just feels so annoying about the way that they download information to us.

I think they want to figure it out. Like, is it just that scientists and they don't. they sort of gave up developing some kind of like personality that anybody would want it like would work I'm not trying to be a dick if you want to be a serious scientist you need to put yourself into a box and not go outside that box that's why what do you mean things that like aliens you can't that's not even something you can go and even talk about you that does not exist. Oh, yeah, right.

You know, keep in that box. Do not go beyond that. Well, I mean, what I gathered, I've learned some new things from this, from what NASA showed us. Number one, space is big. I didn't realize that. I thought, you know, you look up and you're like, yeah, it seems like, you know, medium.

But now we know space is big, so I appreciate that. We now know there's something called science wiggles. That's good to know. And yeah, we've, uh, they don't know exactly, I guess they're confused. And we also know that we don't have the kind of telescopes I thought we fucking had. For some reason, I thought we had way better shit. Like, I don't know why I thought that. I thought we were going to actually see the damn thing, but we don't.

And that's my fault. That's not their fault. They've got garbage up there. They've got fucking old iPhones or something, strapped to a fucking tin can. those pictures suck go back and play it some more let's get mad we'll get out of here this episode of the DTFH

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Maven is another Mars Orbiter that has been studying the Martian. All for your opening remarks. We'll go ahead and start the question and answer. And the other weird thing is the font behind her. We'll never use that font. We'll enter the queue and ask your questions. We'll take our first question from the phone bridge from Marcia Dunn with the Associated Press. Yes, hi.

Based on your latest observation, what more can you tell us about the potential shape of the comet? Can you... Shut up, Piggy. any more It would be the past issue. Orgin, all that sort of thing. Thank you. Thanks for that question.

There's a lot of territory to cover there, so let's see what I can do. The size of the nucleus still has yet to be pinned down. The best data are still from the Hubble observations that Sean was talking about. So we're still right now in that range of somewhere in the vicinity of a couple of thousand feet to a couple of miles diameter, but we'll get better on that one. Essentially, 50,000 cheese pizzas

to put it in a way you might understand. 2,000 feet is a couple miles is a big difference. Especially it's obscured by the reflected sunlight off of the dust in the inner part of the coma. But what observers from the ground have been able to do is observe the brightness of the center of the comet over time to see if there's a modulation of that brightness

that would be in... All right, I can't do it again. We can't get back to this. And it's very difficult to discern. Oh, my God, you guys. Well, I would love to call them, but like, I... You know, I don't... I...

For some reason, I feel compassion for them. And I don't want to. I mean, there's a other part of me that's like, come on, man. like something about all of it feels designed to infuriate i don't know why the whole thing the aesthetic the the mood of the place they're all kind of clumped together in some weird little room there's no one else there they the press has to call they couldn't have the press there i'm not trying to get conspiratorial that one of the dudes talking about it seems like he's like

mid transforming into a reptilian. Because poor eye. It's like he's like, he couldn't afford the most expensive human projection mask and it's some, it's good enough. And then, yeah, it's like, it's, Nick is saying it, it looked like poor production, strange, like low quality stuff. It, it's like you, you just, you're, I'm just real. it's like oh we overestimate NASA in a lot of ways like I for some reason I thought that these images would be like more detailed they wouldn't be these like pixelated things and then on top of that they called it a foam bridge and then on top of that it seems like they're filming from like I don't know like the Delta Sky Lounge like it just it all is just weird

so i i don't know my i don't know my i don't think it was a cover-up mike i just think it's like they're scientists they don't know all the way what it is i don't know how they could know much about it because the pictures suck i could just want to see it you know that's what a baby i am I don't want to see your stupid hydrogen grid. I don't want to see your science wiggles. Just show me the fucking thing. Just show me some dumb-ass, boring rock. But until you do that, people like us,

we're just always going to feel, like, bummed. They're nerds, mixed up says. It's true. Bonged to the dome, I wore this for the revelation of the great mothership. Not for, like, what looks like, Like somebody took a picture of a fucking snowflake or a sucks so bad. Well, while they were doing that, their competitor, Elon Musk, was at the Saudi Investment Forum doing a speech. A talk with Jensen Hong.

About what? About AI in space. Is it possible? Elon says yes, if civilization continues, which are probably will, then AI in space. base is inevitable. Great. More shit we don't care about. I guess, friends, the bottom line is this. We just have to go back to the sage words of Terrence McKenna who said that he always thought it was funny that underneath, I think it's called the Erescebo radio telescope that SETI uses to scan the skies for some signal of alien intelligence.

growing underneath that radio telescope are mushrooms and that anyone could just eat the mushrooms and have some kind of communication with something outside of time space. And maybe that's why it's so frustrating. It's because, you know, these people, and we need people like that, God knows, we need people like that to enjoy the shit that we have. Thank God there's people like that. boring, focused on just data, because if not for them, we wouldn't be able to bitch and moan about them.

They've given us all the stuff. Yeah, they're boring. They suck. But maybe what's frustrating about them is they only look at things through the sort of materialist secularist lens, because that's what we can get data on. People like us, we've all had some sense. There's something else going on. something more than just kind of a stoned intuition and you just want things to be a little bit more

magical than that you they could have why even call it a foam bridge you know like you could have called it the xxor portal you know anything would have been better than what we just witnessed him yeah meanwhile like the dude who's going to get us to Mars is talking about putting chat GPT in space and he's getting rid of poverty too with the AI robots he says how I would love to know how that's going to work he says poverty is an engineering problem and that the AI robots will help eliminate the AI robots will go to all the families that can't afford Thanksgiving turkeys and give them money. That would be amazing.

His drones could fly around and give healthy lunches to kids in school. We need everybody, guys. Everyone's doing their best. Who the fuck knows? Morph says Amazon just announced a new Stargate series, not a remake. That's nice.

That'll be good. bonged to the dome is saying the real magic is in the early 2000s MLB steroids dealer. For real, I don't know. That's hilarious. But we can't be dismayed, friends. Honestly, it's my fault for looking to NASA to confirm my sense that we exist in a universe filled with all forms of life. That's stupid of me. Cut to the moon landing footage again as I wrap this very disappointed.

pointing podcasts up. I have another question if you want. What? There's another question. Oh, sure. Let's hear one more question. It's so hard again. Can you hear me?

We have you loud and clear. Okay, thanks. Sorry about that. You know, I mentioned the rumors that were, you know, kind of scurrying around about this thing in the weeks leading up to this briefing today. I have two questions for anybody who care to answer. One is, did any of you seriously? Did you take seriously the proposition from SOM that just could be an alien spacecraft?

There's no photos. I doubt you did, but I'm asking the question anyway. And number two, is there any evidence you see in any of the data you have that would fit an explanation like that? Or as far as you're concerned, does all the data say conclusively that this is simply a comet that happens to be past. That, uh-huh, thanks. Look at them looking at them. No one says shit. Thanks for the question.

we love all of the different science and all of the different kind of hypotheses into what these things can be you know when you start seeing something you just got a point you know it's natural to wonder what it is and we actually love as Almits said we love that the world wondered along with us and that's such a cool thing

we have feelings she's talking to you Duncan we certainly were able because of the measurements that Sean described from the astrophysics telescopes that immediately turned on on this object once we found it and even you know I was interested I just learned that we'd actually gone back and actually seen it before we even found it's such a long way to answer the question but you know we were very quickly able to look for sort of you know the easiest thing to do I'll put it in a different way is if you if you understand comets pretty well and you understand asteroids pretty well you kind of know the signatures that you're looking for and so you can

sort of look for those quickly and tick them off and say yep it really does does behave like a comet. The interesting thing that, you know, Tom, I know if I give him, if I throw this to him in a second, he's going to geek out about it. But the really cool thing about this is the differences because it comes from somewhere else. And that's why we're so excited about it. It's only the third time that we've been able to identify. Okay. This is a long, unnecessarily long answer to that question. And now, of course, we know better how to look for them. And we now have this amazing Atlas Array.

You know, we're expecting we'll find a lot more of them. Wait, pause it for what second? Ask me if, was there any moment where you guys thought it was something other than a comet? Was there any moment that you thought that it was maybe a spacecraft or something other than a comet? Well, you see, well, Josh, you know, the world, the universe, trees, and life and the sky. who hasn't looked up at the sky and wondered. Are we alone? We want magic.

There's magic in NASA. We do see that as a magical question. And in the question, you know, there's things that you are magical in the question itself. And that's the kind of question that leads to magic. And we have devices. And, yeah, we, we. they were advanced enough for us to determine, you know, there's behaviors in it that seem comet-like, but remember, Josh, this came from somewhere far away. And so that's what makes

it magical in that sense. But we did look at readings and we were able to see comet-like behaviors in it that, in their own way, one could argue, are magic in the sense that, and everything is magic. I mean, who hasn't wanted to be invited to Hogwarts, you know? And the thing is, though we do have the technology to sort of be able to tell, you know, the materials that might be on the comet and such like that, I mean, the best way to think of it, I guess, is, you know, when you take a picture with your phone at a nice dinner that you're at with your wife or girlfriend and the lighting isn't just exactly right

so you didn't get a picture of the chardonnay your wife was drinking sort of thing and yeah we do have billions of dollars of telescopes and such out there in that big old it's big by the way space but yeah we you know couldn't really get a picture of it is the thing and it's yeah so I hope that answers your question. Thank you. You really soothed my curiosity. It's so annoying. It's so annoying.

It's bigger than your apartment, guys. At least we know that. Space is bigger than your apartment. NASA, all the funding, the money we've been giving them, it's worth it. They got a phone bridge, finally. And yeah, the world's still magical, even though, you know, we don't know what the fuck that thing is. Seems to be the synopsis of this incredibly excruciatingly boring press conference. And I guess she's like the disappointer.

Like they threw it to her. She's got painted fingernails. She seems cool. She's kind of the tell them it's magic. Just talk about how you want there to be magic. And then just say some bullshit, Kathy. Play it, scoot up bad. I can't resist, man.

I'm a glutton for punishment here. this guy objects and we have another question from social media from astro nomaeum they ask what makes comet three eye atlas so different and intriguing compared to the other interstellar comments uh the other other interstellar objects we say interstellar objects because not all of them were comets so the first one when i was at miskatonic university i didn't listen to the warning of my professor and decided to open a book a grimoire the Necronomicon. It fucked up my eye and my teeth.

Interesting asteroid in some ways different from the asteroids we're accustomed to seeing in our solar system. For one thing, it was, uh, seemed to be very, very elongated. And, uh, play that again. Why is he doing that? What, wait, what just happened? Why is he doing that? A very interesting asteroid in some ways different from the asteroids. We're accustomed to see.

Why is he, look at the body language. It was, uh, seemed to be very, very elongated. Hold on. I don't, again, I, I am grateful to the work of these scientists, but you know, there are these things that you can get that you shove them in your ass and someone you're dating can make them vibrate at like different times I've heard. So go back and just do that play that squirm again. Did like somebody just start vibrating that thing?

And it's, look, it's just weird. Why did he get all cozy? You say interstellar objects because not all of them were comets. So the first one was discovered in 2017. That was one eye, Omuamua, that behaved very much like an asteroid. Again, a little bit like 3-I Atlas, a very interesting asteroid in some ways. I tried eating gravel once. There's a part.

It seemed to be very, very elongated. And while it was inactive, it seemed to be an inert, mostly rocky object. It did show indirect indications that it was evaporating gases in some way. Is he an alien? For us to get really, really comprehensive long-duration observations and understand exactly what it was doing. It was the very first one. We saw it for a short time when it was on its way out.

I'm not going to keep torturing you guys with this disappointing press conference. You could still watch it. Just go to NASA's YouTube channel if you want to, if you just for some reason, want to plunge your life into an abyss of boredom and darkness, you could go there. But for those of you just joining us, thank you for being here, clearly exactly what I imagined it would be and somehow even more disappointing. I don't know how they turned something that was already sort of disappointing into something like, the feeling I have is like, I don't know, the same feeling I used to get in traffic in

LA. It's like just a kind of frustrated, like, it's definitely some kind of cock block or something like that. All right. Of course, as we wrap up this dream, someone has to be micked up, has to say that's the kind of guy that can't whistle. Self-bin. I'm not even going to be here for five minutes, but I can whistle. So, you know, the difference between me and NASA is that I tell the whole truth. And so in response to the ongoing rumor that I can't whistle, I just want to say this, I think whistling is magical and it's a beautiful thing. I love the sound of a whistle. I love being on an elevator and someone's whistling or someone in a hallway, walking down the hallway in my hotel room when I'm asleep at 5 a.m. I love being woken up by a nice, zesty whistle.

I love all forms of whistle. I love the dog whistle, even. I love whistles, and I can whistle. Of course I can. Of course I can. And the reality of it is, like, if you want, guys, I will show you sonograms of my whistle. If you want to see that, I'll send one to Joshua right now. I can definitely whistle.

Check it out. Not sonograms, that's for babies. I didn't mean that. I know, I knew that it was for babies. I meant to say that. I'm gonna send you... Alright, here you go. Josh, just pull this up on the screen as we wrap it up

for people who are saying I can't whistle. Here you go. Guys, what I'm going to show you is an audio analysis of my whistle. And so hopefully this will put any kind of rumors to rest that I can't whistle. Pull that up. Josh, if you could. No, that's just one second. We're getting it.

Josh is working through the phone bridge right now. He's going to download an image of my whistle on the phone bridge. so you guys could see this yeah so there's my whistle and what you're seeing there so for those of you don't know anything because your big dumb pieces of shit sound it produces waves which is why we call them sound waves and you can measure these waves and what you're seeing here is a measurement of me whistling And so as you could see, those spaces in each of the waveforms, or those are moments as I was pausing in between the whistle.

Science wiggles? And those are science wiggles, for sure. Thanks for pointing that out, Josh. You'll notice the kind of blue there. And I know most of you dumb sacks of shit are thinking of the Smurfs or the Smurfs movie. I just want you to know that's not a smurf. That is an analysis of my whistle,

you could see there it's really quite beautiful if you look at that just how incredible the detail of my whistle is it's amazing and uh this was actually recorded uh last spring when i was particularly happy of course i have been documenting every one of my whistles and uh yeah so there you go hopefully that will put any of the rumors to rest to bed whatever you want to say that i can't whistle there is the evidence it's obvious that I can whistle. So thank you guys so much for tuning in to the DTFH. If you happen to live in Tampa, my last weekend of the year is, hopefully not of my life, but the last stand-up weekend of the year is happening this Thursday, Friday, and Saturday it's side-splitters in Tampa, Florida. After that, I'm taking a break because there's about

to be another trussle on this planet. God go with you into the next. night my sweet children love each other love yourselves don't let the warlock's guild frustrate you i'm sure that thing was a fucking mothership it came to me in a dream i'll see you guys next week we're dark but i'll see you week after next happy thanksgiving god bless you