Duncan Trussell Family Hour - Adam Eget in GHOSTS, CULTS and COMEDY

Episode Date: March 11, 2016

Adam Eget, the talent coordinator of The Comedy Store, joins the DTFH and we talk about the insanity of being a talent coordinator, the ghosts of the comedy store, and the dangerous cult that Adam spent two and a half years in when he was a kid.   This episode brought to you by CASPER.COM go to CASPER.COM/Family hour and use offer code family hour to get $50 towards your brand new non-infected mattress.

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This episode of the DTFH is brought to you by the Sleep Angels over at Casper.com. It's time for a new mattress. Go to Casper.com, forward slash family hour, and use offer code family hour, and get $50 off a brand new mattress that hasn't been infected with the life ooze of you, your lovers and your dogs and cats and animals. Hello, dear friends, it is I, Duncan Trussell, and you have joined the Duncan Trussell Family Hour podcast. To all newcomers, we welcome you with multiple arms stretching out from multiple torsos and

a wide array of arms and torsos and ears and noses and eyeballs. At this very moment, you have tuned in to a community of people all over the planet who are listening to my raspy lesbian voice ramble, and I am incredibly grateful that you have made the decision to come swimming in the digital pond of this podcast when there are so many other podcasts out there. My God, a billion trillion podcasts have emerged. We're talking the Cambrian explosion of podcasts has happened. An incredible expulsion of ideas, thoughts, conversations, some of them good, some of

them maybe not that great, but they're developing. I got to tell you, one thing I really don't like are the podcast haters, and that's not just because my main job is that of a podcaster, but because what ends up happening is all the people out there who have the inkling of desire to have a podcast don't do it because they saw this person tweet about how there's too many podcasts or they are that person yapp about how the market is oversaturated. There's always someone out there who's going to do something like that, and they're not necessarily evil, nefarious, or dark people.

They're not intentionally attempting to put their calloused heel on the garden hose of creativity that has emerged from the sweet internet, but that's what they're doing anyway. Now, it's not their fault, really, if you hear anybody who tells you you shouldn't be an artist or you shouldn't attempt to be an artist, and then you don't attempt to be an artist because someone told you you shouldn't do it, then it's 100% your fault. You can't let anybody get in the way of you and God, the creative process, whatever you want to call it. This is why, though I don't consider myself a Christian, I really love the New Testament

because we have this weird, healing, magical, water walking hippie wandering around telling everybody, you know the guys who dress in the funny outfits and say they have a direct connection to God, you don't have to listen to them anymore. You can have a one-on-one, direct conversation with the universe whenever you want to, wherever you happen to be, whatever you happen to be doing. Even if you're in the midst of a six-hour porn binge surrounded by a cluster of semen-encrusted Kleenex's that radiate out from your office chair like some kind of terrible genetic doom flower, even if you have just gone through a six-hour porn binge and heroin needles are

hanging out of your arm like an opiated porcupine, even if you have just gotten off the phone with your mom in the midst of a six-hour porn binge after blasting your veins full of heroin and called her a cunt and then came into a Kleenex that you tossed down next to your chair and are now smoking a cigarette and watching more porn, you can still connect with that never-ending outflow of creativity that a lot of people lazily call God. That's my belief and you should test it out. The main thing is, be a little scientist about all this stuff, try it out. The point is, don't let any of these hex-casting curse mongers trick you into thinking that

for whatever reason you aren't allowed, you aren't capable, you don't have the ability to produce some kind of art in this world. Is the art going to be great? Is it going to get hung in a museum? Is your podcast going to get a million downloads? Is President Barack Obama going to come over to your house and have a conversation with you because you're so good at interviewing? Who knows?

Maybe not, but that's not the point. When you get caught up in the outcomes, when you get caught up in the results, when you get caught up in the fruits of your action, then you don't get to enjoy the initial paycheck that comes from the incredible harmonization that you can experience with everything that is. What that harmonization is, there's a lot of different words. Some people call it inspiration. Some people call it epiphany.

Some people call it enlightenment, but whatever it is, it feels fucking great. I don't care if it's just that when you finish a podcast or a painting or a book or you finish writing a story or you finish anything, anything, even if you finish a Snapchat, if you finish a 15-second Instagram video, whatever it is, your synaptic vesicles release some of that sweet, good old-fashioned happy juice that we call dopamine, and for a little while you're going to feel okay. You're going to get high on the amazing chemicals that exist in the celestial pharmacy that exists in your brain.

You know me, I love getting high, and there isn't a more pure drug than that which your mind creates. All the other stuff is great as it may be. The sweetest, freshly baked, I don't think you bake LSD, but the sweetest, sweetest LSD, the sweetest, sweetest LSD cannot compare to the incredible, glorious, psychotropic chemicals that your mind creates on its own. Your mind is a really interesting drug dealer because the way it dispenses drugs is by getting you to do healthy things generally.

Those drug dealers, when you go over there, they're not going to ask you to do push-ups, run five miles, write an essay on what love is, or a short story, or a painting, or a podcast. They're just going to ask for money. But the drug dealer that exists in your brain, he's a creative fella, and he requests really interesting forms of payment from running five miles to forgiving someone that you haven't forgiven in a while, that paying pills that you've been putting off. These are the fees that are charged by this eccentric pharmacist who lives in your brain

cave. Now, back in the old days when the Reagan pigs had clamped down on all forms of drugs and had shoved all forms of drugs from cannabis, to mushrooms, to LSD, to heroin, to crack cocaine into one category, back in the old days, even though it's still happening a little bit, but at least it's not happening in Los Angeles, back in the old days, you would go through things called a marijuana drought. I don't know if you guys are still experiencing that. If you live in California, if you're in Denver, you will never experience that again, but

in the old days, back in Hendersonville, North Carolina, if you wanted marijuana, sometimes it would just dry up. People would get busted. There would be big old marijuana busts. You'd hear about them on the news and you'd know that, well, weed's going to dry up for a little while. It's just gone. All your dealers, they just don't have any and if they do have any, they're charging

way too much money for it based on the laws of supply and demand. It sucked. You'd go into these terrible marijuana droughts and it was just a mess. It was a real bummer, especially if it happened during the summer when you were just trying to enjoy camping and swimming and the rivers and lakes of North Carolina. If you worked at a summer camp or whatever, it was just a real bummer, right? It sucked. So, in the same way, if you're somebody who's going through some rough times, maybe a depression

or just a general sense of bland boringness, that kind of strange calamity that can unexpectedly fall upon a human being on this planet where the flowers don't seem as bright anymore. You don't feel as connected to nature. You feel a little distracted. You're a little blurry. You're on your phone too much. You're scanning bits of information like some scrounging, starving squirrel and some icy tundra looking for a nut and you're just kind of, you're not depressed.

You're just bored and maybe you're depressed. Who knows? You know, a lot of times prolonged boredoms can lead to depression, but in my opinion, if you find yourself in that situation where day after day, your love turns gray like the skin on a dying man's back, that's a Pink Floyd quote, then there may be a kind of neurological drought happening in your brain. It may be that the drug dealer in your brain for whatever reason has decided to dry up the supply of dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, whatever you believe your neurological God

happens to be. And if that's the case, then you might want to take a look at your life and ask yourself if that pharmacist, that alchemist, that biological engineer existing in your brain is demanding some kind of payment that you haven't been offering. Have you been running? Have you been going out in the sun? Have you been creating anything at all? When was the last time you created something?

When was the last time you sat on and did a drawing? When was the last time you went to an art supply store and bought a canvas and some paint and just attempted to paint? When was the last time you made some music? Man, we exist in the glory age of creating music. It's so easy and fun now. It's so easy and fun. And let's all simultaneously give the middle finger to those shitty, old, crusty, bitter

bastards who are jealous because these days you don't have to go through the severe learning curve that you had to go through if you wanted to learn to play music. Thanks to incredible programs like Logic. Thanks to amazing synthesizers. Thanks to... And all of these things, by the way, you can get demos for free right now. And you could get a MIDI keyboard that will plug into your computer and have a really amazing synthesizer for less than like 90 bucks if you go to Guitar Center or wherever.

So my point is we have access to all this technology that in some way overcomes a lot of the learning curves that people used to have to go through if they wanted to create art. And that means that at this very moment there are a million different possible ways that you could create something, that you could create a miniature work of art. And it doesn't have to be something... The project doesn't have to take years. We're not even talking about months.

We're talking hours. Just sit down for an hour, get a copy of GarageBand, get a copy of Logic, download a sample of Photoshop or just get a piece of paper and a pen or just get some paint or just get something laying around the house and some tape, make a little collage, anything at all. Just do it and you will experience an amazing high, a really incredible kind of psychedelic trip that comes not just from the completion of a project, but the weird vanishing of time that happens when you experience this strange magnetic suction of the thing that you're creating.

You will feel a kind of... You'll feel yourself get pulled into something. You'll feel this thing coming through. You'll start doing stuff and you won't understand why. You'll watch yourself doing it and you won't understand why. You won't even know who you are at that time. You won't even be there more than likely, but what'll happen is you'll look up at the clock and an hour or two or three or six has passed and here is this brand new thing that

you've brought into the universe, a completely brand new thing. You, a spinaret, the end result of 13.7 billion years of universal organization has continued its unfolding process in the form of some sketch, a podcast, a collage, a song, whatever it may be, and that is a fucking miracle, man. It's a miracle when you look at the sheer improbability, the sheer statistical improbability of you existing at all and then consider that you, this thing that exists in this infinite universe, is actually creating stuff based on your subjective experience or based on some intuition that you don't even understand.

That's a miracle. Many of these sons of bitches that are in your life, father forgive them. They know not what they do, but you've got to start ignoring them. The person who told you you're not an artist, the person who told you you're not a writer, the person who told you you couldn't be a comedian, the person who told you you couldn't be a podcaster, the person who told you you couldn't do this or that you're using their dark voodoo as an excuse to avoid the feeling of placing your psychic tendrils on the infinite electric fence that is the creative flow of the universe.

It's scary. You lose control. You know when you grab an electric fence, you just lock down on it for a second. It grabs you and hopefully someone will knock you off the fence, but in the same way, this strange conduit, the source of creativity, the source of great ideas, if you allow yourself to get close to it, you'll clamp down for a second and something will come out of you. It might be something you've been trying to avoid because many of us don't like vomiting. That's something that isn't fun.

There's a you lose control and you're puking. When it finally happens, you know, when you finally at 3 a.m. manage to stumble out of the bed after you had six vodka's that night and you actually just lose control, you can't breathe anymore because a geyser of vile vodka puke mixed with the hot dog you had after you left the bar comes flying out of you in an awful rainbow of poison into the toilet. It's not the most exciting thing to experience, but creativity, art, if you want to call it that, the creative process, it's weirdly similar. In this case, the thing that you're vomiting up isn't some regurgitated vileness, but is

actually something quite beautiful, something that over time, if you keep doing it, can actually develop into something that can help other people, God forbid, or can just make people feel happy or can inspire people. So there you go, friends, spend this weekend. Go to a craft store, write a letter, make something, create something. If you're experiencing a drought of those sweet, beautiful brain chemicals right now, do a little experiment. See if perhaps that drug dealer in your brain might give you a little bit of a supply in

exchange for a nice work of art. What a sweet drug dealer. There aren't many out there like that. Usually they want your money or they want your body or they want something else. But in this case, they want your art. It wants your art. It wants you to create. Give it a shot.

I challenge you to do it. Today, my God, this podcast is really cool. It's got everything I love in a podcast. We've got ghosts, we've got talk of comedy, and we've got a cult and a serial killer. It's all in this podcast with the amazing Adam Egett. We're going to jump right into it, but this episode of the Dunkin' Trustle Family Hour podcast is brought to you by the fancy lads and lasses over at Casper.com. If you go to casper.com forward slash family hour and use offer code family hour, you will

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are an autonomous being constantly defining itself in every single moment. Casper.com forward slash family hour, use offer code family hour and get yourself a brand new mattress. We're also brought to you by amazon.com. There's no reason for you to go out anymore. You know recently I went to the Glendale Galleria because I wanted to buy a new shirt and it really was just brutal. It was brutal in every level.

It was just sick, something about it's sick. I don't want to go to Tivana. I went into the Apple store for no reason and just like a creep drew on the iPad in there and then I kind of shuffled in to Bloomingdale's and bought a $70 shirt and just left feeling confused and sad and that's what happens when you go to a place that's collecting the consumeristic farts of thousands of people all day long. Your brain doesn't understand it. It knows that not far from wherever you may be is some radiant glowing bit of nature whether

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Big thanks to all of you who continue to donate to this podcast. If you want to go crazy you can actually do a monthly donation thing through PayPal. I'm not really sure how you do it but I know people have spontaneously started doing that and I'm very grateful to you all for doing that. Completely not necessary but if you decide to do it I will be very thankful but I'm not asking for it. You don't have to do anything really all I care about is that you listen to this show and that makes me feel really good.

It gives me a purpose in life and it makes me feel like truly I must exist in some kind of garden of Eden slash heaven slash god realm and that's all because of you guys. Finally this is maybe the biggest announcement of them all and I have to keep making this announcement on every single podcast. I am going on tour and very quickly I'm going to read all of the dates that I'm going to. Asheville that starts on March 30th then from there to Charleston Durham Richmond Baltimore Washington DC on April 5th I don't know what's going on with Washington guys get these tickets in advance I'm starting to feel like Washington doesn't like me.

All the other shows are doing great let's get some tickets at Washington friends what have I done this our nation's capital the home of the Illuminati it's right there I don't know what I did to offend you guys but if you're in Washington DC come to the Howard Theater on April 5th and get tickets in advance won't you Philadelphia Hamden Boston New York Brooklyn Pittsburgh Columbus Cleveland Ferndale Toronto Chicago Madison Minneapolis Kansas City St. Louis Nashville Vancouver Seattle Portland San Francisco and back in Los Angeles and then finally the whole thing ends with a wonderful week in Maui oh wow that's going to be a great week where I'm going to be doing podcasts at the spring retreat with my teacher

Ram Dass and Lama Suridas and a lot of other incredible people I hope you guys will come to these shows please don't put off buying tickets I know you probably hear this a lot when comedians are shilling their shows but tickets are going really fast right now for these shows and if you buy them in advance it assures that you'll be able to get in and that's what we all want also it gives me a glowing feeling of warmth and security to watch the tickets sell that makes me feel good so don't put it off I'm a hypocrite for telling you to not put it off because I put everything off I buy my plane tickets at the last minute I buy every ticket the last minute and if a show sells out I'm usually like whatever

I get to stay home and play Far Cry I don't really care so I understand but if you feel it in your heart go on the internet right now if you're nearby you're thinking about coming to these shows and get the tickets in advance okay my dear darling sweet friends today's guest is a really cool guy who happens to have the job that I used to have at the world famous comedy store in Los Angeles so I used to be the talent coordinator of the comedy store and this is a job that is a pretty high pressure crazy job and you're basically in charge of what comedians get to perform every single night and when I was the talent coordinator I was basically Mitzi Shore the owner of the comedy store's assistant

so I didn't have any real power thank God which meant that if comedians weren't getting spots they couldn't get angry at me about it because it was all because of Mitzi but Adam he's the one actually doing these lineups and it's an insane job it's a combination of counselor, tyrant, benevolent dictator, euthanizer, mystic, shaman it's the job requires so many weird skills and Adam is just doing an incredible job of it if you haven't been to the comedy store lately definitely stop by something is reactivated in that place and it's sold out almost every night the energy there is just incredible dark powerful vibrant and I think a lot of it is because of the energy that Adam has been pouring into that

club also Adam has had a very interesting past including getting sucked into a cult and so we talk about that in this podcast we talk about ghosts we talk about the comedy store and I got to tell you I really this is one of my favorite episodes that I've ever done so now everybody please open your hearts send out as much love happiness joy any kind of sweetness that you can send the direction of today's guest who is truly doing the Lord's work at the comedy store in West Hollywood everybody please welcome to the Duncan trustle family our Adam Eget Adam Jack awesome hey man welcome to the podcast thanks for having me thanks for coming up here you know I

guess the best way to start is to talk about this job that you have right that I used to have yes you did you are the talent coordinator of the comedy store right and can you describe for the people who maybe aren't aware of what the comedy store is can you describe it to people like how would you describe it well I mean it was always described to me as an artist comedy and I think that's a pretty accurate depiction I think that it's probably evolved a little bit I think it's become more it's changed it's evolved certainly but I think at its core I think it's still just this artist colony where comics come and feel safe to hang out and perform and work out new material it's like a gym I think it's like a gym right yeah it's a combination any other comedy

club gym mental asylum energy vortex it's it is an energy vortex yeah it's there's a dark I don't want to scare it there really is like I'm not I was always incredibly skeptical but since work I you know I've been there for only I've only been there for about five years now but I feel it and over time like you it's not something that I felt an instantly but over time it just sort of like it's clear it's pretty clear to me there's something there I think when people think about a comedy club when they think about most comedy clubs their idea is a kind of sanitized place you know in general unless like you live in Denver and have been to the comedy works or there's a few that have real character but mostly you just think of a kind of sanitized place you go in sit down

have a dinner yep some people will do stand up and then and then that's it and you leave if you're an audience member but the comedy store is this haven for comedians many of them who have been there for decades now for decades are just celebrated 40th anniversary last night 40th anniversary so this is a life for people there and and I can remember so when I was working for Mitzi as a talent coordinator somebody called in there at Vales and I guess I didn't write them down or something and I wasn't thinking it was that big a deal and she's like this is their life honey it's so true because yeah when they stop getting spots or they get less yeah it's it's almost it's I've never seen anything like it how many spots are there per week that you have

at the comedy store I mean I've added a few shows I'd say what so you got 15 spots a night yeah in the OR so that and that's and that's six nights a week so we got 90 spots 90 plus then you got the two main room shows yeah that's another 20 because you only have about 10 on those okay and then I added so what is that that's 110 plus maybe I added an early Saturday show which gave me another 10 okay so we have about 120 spots give or take a few spots yeah for the week to give to comedians yes and how many comedians want spots oh pages so I got scores I mean you've seen the name anybody that's been to the comedy store sees those names on the wall and I'd say you know I don't have ace trucking company calling in for spots but a good percentage of

those names that are on the wall still call in every week right even if they don't get spots because I tell people I want you know I just I tell people that uh to keep calling in because you never know if there's a bunch of people that are gonna be out of town one week and I may need someone but it doesn't happen because no matter what you're gonna have this hierarchy of talent calling in right so you're gonna have people like bill burr you're gonna have people like rogan you're gonna have these like lex louisey k yeah legendary legendary legendary comedians calling in so you've got some percentage of those spots has to go to those people at any spot they're calling for you're running a business so the people when the audience comes if you were to like do a vote

for like who would you like to see perform bill burr yeah or this guy who's like working on material on his new hour that you've probably never seen before right they're gonna say bill burr 100% of the time but the challenge of the job is that you can't you don't want it to just be a showcase club for famous comedians because the heart and soul of the thing is that people come through there figure this craft or art out and then go on to you're growing it's like a what do you call it's like a greenhouse so yeah you're growing comedians too exactly and I think that I try and maintain I remember Argus used to tell me that Argus Hamilton we were just talking about been there for 40 years and he said the mitzi looked at it like a canvas and I don't want to

sound pretentious I just got thrown into the job but I try to keep that in mind when I do the lineups and so from yeah from 945 to about 1030 I try and put those comics in that that we just that you just discussed yes eloquently is the people that the audience mostly wants to see yeah and the big draws and then I put the people that are up and come that are like right on the cusp that are about to I think are the best I have that aren't household names yet yeah but will soon be probably household names then I put the dark like the the people that deserve their shot at a chance to develop much like the the comics who came before them had a chance to develop who only been passing the last year or two yeah and then that kills everyone like so all those people

that were getting spots before I brought Rogan you know Rogan was was awesome enough to come back to the store it's so great to have him and Diaz back and then I brought in you know all these other comics like Anthony Cheslenick and then yeah Louis when he's in town and Rock when he's in town and then Bill Burr and uh um brought in Greg Fitzsimmons and uh and Nikki Glazer and all these people so that killed a lot of spots man right and it's uh you know what it was like I mean I think that we we had different we obviously have incredibly different experiences in the same position but I think that you have you more than anyone I know you've been invaluable to talk to about this we're talking about a dog with 120 nipples basically right a dog with 120 nipples and we're

talking about these beings who depend on the sustenance from those nipples for a lot of different things for to develop their material for just a sense of gratification just a feeling like okay I must be doing all right I'm getting spots to just a feeling of like accomplishment and so it's it's and comedians are everyone knows that when you talk when you just when you describe a comedian it's very rare that you hear oh yes it's a very level-headed emotionally stable person like comedians are like comedians have the reason they're so funny is because many of them have very difficult childhoods many of them have a lot of stuff going on and they're using comedy as a way to survive basically it's keeping them it's it's all that they've got and it's all that

they want it's the only thing they could do so I'm I'm building it up maybe a little more dramatically than I know I think that's pretty close yes so you so this creates as the talent coordinator you find yourself unfortunately for me when I was the talent coordinator it was mitzi was the one doing the spots right but you find yourself this is not a normal job no you find yourself as a kind of either benevolent or tyrannical dictator running a tiny tiny little island and this island is filled with some of the most intelligent manipulative chaotic people on planet earth so it is a fascinating job and I don't think a lot of people understand the amount of psychic abuse and torture and mind-numbing just mind-numbing guilt that can come in this job because people are people will

come to you and they're you have legitimately even though you didn't intend to intend to do it you have legitimately fucked up their lives and it's not your fault no I know right I don't yeah I don't sleep much anymore I really don't um I used it's funny because I used to have different reasons for not uh for having restless nights and now it's it's become all about the store and these and these lives that you just discussed um it's difficult I hate it kills me a little inside every time I have to tell someone I don't have spots for them yeah and uh I I know how important it is to these people and um it's just I have to just I have to do what I feels right like and I and it's nothing personal but um it always feels that way at least on their end and I understand

that are you grinding your teeth yet oh yeah yeah that's the you yeah so you start like grinding your teeth you start like having these just like you you you get embroiled and I don't know if people understand the dramas that well these storm systems will erupt in this place like I could tell you there's sagas that happen there I'm I'm I'm already a part of them I it's um it's like a soap opera mixed with the overlook hotel I look at it like my overlook hotel it really is like the overlook hotel and I feel like Jack Torrance I really do like I'm losing my mind there and I feel like we've all we've always been there like you look at these pictures on the wall of all the ghosts and all the people from the past and and it just it just really does and there's a dark energy it's

like there's it really does the main room reminds me of the gold ballroom it's it's just uh the but the that the dress the green room in the main room come on they're just all the history there it's the heart of the building right there I know it's it's the what is it called the lodge and Twin Peaks there oh my god I've been I just finished uh I just rewatched it I watched the last episode this morning at 3am that's so weird it is it's the black lodge it's the black lodge and and so much has gone on there you know people have died you know this is a famous story that there's a I think they actually that's what the new showtime series is based on the book I'm dying up here which is about a comedy store comedian who jumped from the roof of the high next door to

the comedy store with a sign around his neck saying I am Denise I am Steve Lubeckin I used to work at the comic store I used to be a comic I used to be a paid regular something like that something like that but so that's how serious this place is and this is the that's how serious this bizarre little ecosystem is and the difficulty I think in your position as a talent coordinator as opposed to when I had the job is you have no shield exactly and I think okay so with Mitzi's era so it's his era it was an era it was an era um you had Johnny like it literally would make and make someone's career a spot because you had the the Carson bookers who would be in the crowd yeah and would just watch there they'd watch religiously every night and it was just a different

when Johnny Carson's show came moved from New York to LA and that created this this boom where which inevitably created the improv in the comedy store because all these stand-up comedians started going up at the store in the improv and and then someone from the Carson show would see them and put them up the next day and it would virtually make a career that's Freddie Prince and all these people and then it it's something changed you know over time that I think now we're in a place where it just doesn't it doesn't work that way anymore obviously where where the Carson show it just doesn't exist that format that now it's gone yeah it's gone but but still there's so many comics right now it's so popular I I can't even fathom it just seems like there's

there's so many and there's so few spots available yeah and yeah it's true that um I don't have Mitzi as a shield but I don't know I think there's pros and cons to to to both where where you had you could deflect it to Mitzi um but I'm not like there's other stuff involved like I I'm just it's not my club so right I have I have bosses to answer to but unfortunately I don't I don't I have to I have to fulfill all of these obligations and these and these wishes and in other requests from from my employers and and we have to make sure that we're making money and the and the and the club is full and then I don't know it's it's hard to explain but I but unfortunately I have to I have to put it all on myself I can't I can't say oh so and so told me I have to put this person up you know what

I mean but since your reign started yeah you followed the reign of Tommy and since your reign started the place is flourished like the club is booming it's never when I was there it certainly wasn't like that when I was there this was like you know this is the um there's really interesting and guys I know this price if you haven't been at the comedy store but just trust me when I tell you everything we're saying we're barely inflating it really is like that but an Arthurian legend if you've ever watched uh X caliber sure they they say when the king is sick the land is sick right exactly so the the spirit of the ruler is reflected in the land and like when I was there you know Mitzi was going was it was a rough spot for her man and like uh she had a lot of concerns

I think most of her life it's spent the main concern is just developing comedians everything was about the comedy store she treated that place with the exact same level of discipline and energy that whenever you hear about like the great great people like Einstein or whenever you hear about the greatest of the greats it's always amazing how they're inexhaustible they're the moment they wake up to the moment they go to bed they a hundred percent are focused on this one thing and that's what Mitzi was like and but then Mitzi you know she's you know we all have a human body and the human body gets old and so she started having these other concerns and so the place it kind of started like getting wonky like it was wobbly and out of like and it certainly wasn't

profitable at that time and then um and I think her lineups reflected the the state of mind that she was in or you know did well she wasn't yeah I I mean you were there I wasn't there at that time well it was it was all these comics that weren't really relevant anymore and weren't the doors was pretty sealed were sealed pretty tight right so so what was happening is there wasn't an influx of a lot of like what you're seeing right now which is like you know there's there just was it's it felt like it was kind of like a skipping record a little bit right it just felt a little like it just wasn't moving forward it was a wax museum or yeah like a tomb almost yeah yeah that's right that's right it just didn't feel it just didn't have the like because I remember when I first came

to the comedy store as a phone guy there's a comedian named Russell who um uh was telling me what it was like in the 80s you know because he'd been there and he's like you don't understand man there were lines out the door the the it was packed it was always packed the energy was incredible you just don't know man it was just the most amazing place everywhere you looked there was another famous comedian it was just insane right and I remember him describing that to me and just thinking well it ain't that now man it's definitely not that now it evolved into Wonka where it's like no one ever goes in no one ever goes out that's what that's exactly it that's it and she was Willy Wonka yeah man and yeah that's it that's totally the gates were shut so then um I left Tommy took

my place and then Tommy got a little more responsibility I guess and and you know we all there's no point going to that story right but then um and then you came and all of a sudden just everything just blew up in the place and like now when I go there it's like holy shit this is what Russell was talking about like I'm this is like this thing is flowering now that had not flowered in years and it's really an intense thing to witness man it's it's a palpable like it's tangible like you can feel it last night Seinfeld came in and performed he hasn't been on stage in that room since 1979 holy that was the last time he was there he told a great story about how Mitzi never liked him never passed him yeah that's right actually he told this great story about how

after he he found all his success like he was he just got the show was a huge hit and he kept calling in for spots and Mitzi goes yeah I know you're you know you're really sexy I just don't like you yeah she really just told her she said that basically um he's gonna need someone to keep him grounded and that's and that's who she and that was what she was well that was part of her I think that was part of her technique man like his because she was an icon icon and she really was developing comedians yeah and when you hear that and you think oh well what am I gonna do with him what are you doing no yeah that's probably what you like what am I gonna do with him he's already now he's already developed or whatever like when these I think she is still was trying to

develop I think that she so when we think about like comedy comedy is uh stand up is is a craft that you learn from failure right you learn from rejection absolutely learn from bombing yeah you learn from what doesn't work and you learn whether or not you know if it doesn't work is it because use that joke sucks or is it because it's not the right room for right so there's only things you learn but it's a art it's an art of pain right yes so if someone was great art comes from great pain that's right absolutely and if mitzi is the patron of that art form then she must therefore induce pain as part of her process in teaching people yeah yeah the George Martin got rest in peace of uh of stand-up comedy that's it yeah that's it in flit to putting that so when like someone

and and that was what was you know that was the what was great about her process and also her Kelly's heel is that she of all the people in the world she of course would be the one who tells fucking Seinfeld now honey you're gonna have to respect that so much I do too I love it I love her for it yeah and I think about that and I just and I love what you said about the the pain and not and and how the importance of bombing and failure all the the the importance of failure makes me think of the uh I stayed at Ari's place in New York went to Irish a fear and he had this great um this huge like calendar it wasn't it was just a chart I guess where it had it had a 100 you've seen that 100 dates and an x through each day yeah and on the top I think it was Bobby Lee I don't

know he must have heard from Bobby I think and he said uh you're you're never gonna be you have to bomb 100 times to be a great comic so there's 100 squares on this son of a bitch for every time that fucking guy bombed he wrote a date in what a brilliant son of a bitch who loves him so much man I'm so happy for him that is so cool yeah and and so so this so this place the way she she did it and it wasn't just pain the the other thing about Mitzi that was so incredible and that kind of elevated her to like a a cult like status uh is that not only was she a master at dispensing pain in the sense of in the form of true rejection like because I had to I listen what you're it's like putting animals to sleep like she would make the decision that this comic or that comic

couldn't come to the store anymore these were the bands she called it banning comedians but so so I would have to get on the phone and tell a comedian I'm really sorry she says she wants you to work out at other clubs for a little while and and it was the most those are the most brutal phone calls to make it's like fire it's yeah it sucks it's worse than firing way worse because it's like yeah you're taking away a canvas from someone who like is depending on that canvas but again it's there you have to understand the comedy club isn't the only club to work at and if you've gotten it in your head that the comedy store isn't the only club so but uh outside of that aspect ever the other aspect ever I have never seen anybody who loves comedians more than that

woman so when she wasn't like of inflicting you by putting you on stage for four weeks straight following someone you just broke up with because she didn't like comedians to date so like if if like the the moment like comedians broke up you could be certain one would follow the other on the lineup because she thought it was so fucking funny her so many stories like a so funny big fight and then one's bringing up the other that's right you can bet on that you can bet on it for sure because she thought was funny and also was she's teaching these incredible lessons right she's teaching that like your art has to transcend your social life you have to be able to like handle any situation so she's so there was this other thing that this thing inside of her that's just

like the most amazing love and I we don't have to keep going on about the comedy store because some other stuff I want to talk about this but the um I have I I remember like one of my favorite stories about her is uh we're sitting down by the bar because that's where she'd do business and um one thing she'd do I'll tell two quick stories about her man one thing that she'd do is uh pretend to be feeble if she was in a business meeting right so I remember like someone would come with some idea something they wanted to do everyone had these things they wanted to do there and I and like I'd be sitting with her and right before the person came she's like just sharp and focused and completely there and completely there at the level of like some like like you're with a

president or something you know like just a mogul or something just completely there okay what's going on today all right well okay who is this son of a bitch all right well then they come in and you watch her just kind of shrink down suddenly she's not this like dragon being she's just this kind of old lady who's like maybe not all there and then oh my god and then from that the person would start treating her differently you know so the way that they would because she seems so vulnerable so they'd start revealing what they're like I swear I saw that's amazing then they'd leave and she'd be like right back she's like fuck that guy brilliant man brilliant brilliant brilliant but the other thing because we always had these meetings at that bar man the other thing um

that she I'll never forget this kid comes in just coming to town from Florida wanted to be a comedian you know walks right up right up to us sitting there right up to us sitting there in that look man she's had the the the side eye man she had the sat the most amazing like she looks up at him and he's like I'm I came from Florida I want to be a comedian I just want to work out here and you know you're like oh shit what's going to happen right you know the this could go either way and and like you just see her like light up all of this love comes pouring out of her and she's like oh great honey oh that's good you will start working you out on Sundays on the open mic and it was the sweetest thing wow that first time oh but then after that torture torture torture

torture you know but the first there's this welcoming sweetness followed by the screws being put in and it creates some great comics that technique you know I don't want to go back to Ari but really quick Ari said he had to showcase for her 30 30 something times before she passed yeah that's right it's wild yeah she was so good at that yeah the the pain and I think she in her mind I think it's like if if I I'm gonna make it so that unless you're a comedian you're not going to keep doing this right I'm gonna save you from going down a path that maybe isn't your path by putting these ridiculous Shaolin monastery kung fu level challenges in front of you right and when and if you really want to be a comedian you're gonna you're gonna

get through it yeah and if you don't want to be a comedian you're not and you can blame it on me you could say it's the comedy stories fault you could blame it on whatever you want but a real comedian is very similar to that fucking daisy you see growing up out of a sidewalk it's gonna grow no matter what no matter what gets in its way it's gonna grow absolutely so even in even in the the comedy store environment and I think that if there's any balm that you can have when you start feeling that guilt of telling people that that they don't have spots for them right now it's that if they're a comedian they're gonna keep doing comedy and if they're a comedian they're gonna find places to go up and if they're a comedian they're gonna keep developing and if

they're a comedian they're gonna figure out a way to get those spots again at the comedy store and it's up to them it's not you it's not on you it's not your fault and I think that's one of the most important lessons in all art don't be a fucking victim don't be dependent on this place or that place or any place a thousand percent and I and I got to witness at first hand all of these comics who were so bitter and and held it held it against Tommy their misfortunes or their you know the success that they never achieved they always held most of them I don't want to say all of them but yeah many of them held that against Tommy and they and they held it so tightly and I never I never understood that and then I think once I took over I think a lot of them realized

this had nothing to do with Tommy this is I I'm the only one um held it should be held accountable for for any success I achieve and it's it's my you know yeah it's up to me it's up to you yeah it's up to you it's up to everyone you're not a victim you can't be and if you're if you eat especially when it comes to art art victims come on really like this is your like you're an art victim that's ridiculous nonsense it's nonsense and and and it's a and putting yourself into that position as an art victim is is really to I think uh negate the thing that's going to make you a really funny comic which is coming to terms with your failure looking into your heart and witnessing yes where yeah it's accountability yeah and it's yeah if you want to make a change it's it's got to come

from with you it's not with the regime change no you know certainly not no it doesn't mean I still feel an incredible guilt you still are gonna hurt from it but but as long as I just anybody not just in like when it comes to comedy store but anytime most like I know from personal experience when I'm blaming someone else for my own failure there I can always look into my heart and see every single time that I didn't do the thing I was supposed to do all the little steps I took that led to the failure and from that analysis I usually am able to find the way out because if you can find the way you got in you can always find the way out yeah absolutely yeah but if you don't if you think you are sort of like hoodwinked or tricked or the world against you yeah then how

do you get out of that mess now you're just in an endless prison of victimhood why hold on so tightly it's gonna you're gonna be you're gonna remain stagnant you're not gonna move forward you're just holding on tightly like golem clutching this ring yeah bitterness that's it and anger and it's all misguided it's all misguided there's one little one quick little anecdote that I always loved about mitzi that I heard recently again mitzi and tommy the old talent coordinator were sitting in the main room one day and she turns to tommy and she said tommy I swear I think their comics are living in here and she goes no and he goes no mitzi I think I don't I don't think that's true that's not true and then the exact moment this comic who didn't get many spots comes waltzing

out of the main room green room in a literally in a towel drying his hair off with another towel hey mitzi she just like she just gave that side look that you were describing to tommy I love that story the funniest shit would happen around her man like stuff that would happen around her that was so perfectly timed and insanely funny and her reaction to it was like man it sounds so weird but she was so connected to that building man that her reaction to it was like sometimes she felt like she was the building like turned into a person it's really weird being a lot of metaphysical stuff goes on there I'm not ashamed to sit to to believe in it I know it's there I've seen it it's incredible I was a skeptic for a long time and then when I started closing up every night

and during the witching hour at three o'clock I never saw anything but man I I certainly felt did I tell you my ghost experience there no man I had a couple one of them I I guess I mean one of them was just like crazy which was mitzi was pissed at me this was before Carlos Mincia's like fall from from grace so he's like a big deal and he uh wanted to come perform at the store he was coming and uh man I just forgot to put his name on the sign man and he's a big fuck up though you know because that's gonna bring some people in and and but for mitzi like a thing like that now you you know it's like all right whatever man just like get it together put his name on the sign put it up now yeah but for mitzi oh man that's no you forgot

to put the headline this big headliner's name on the sign of the building we're not getting like big numbers right now what are you doing man that's a real fuck up so like I remember she's just like she comes in she walks up to me and she's just like basic I can't remember what she said exactly she's like fuck you donkey and your heart shrivels in your chest you could feel your heart withering you could feel just those petals of your heart folding inward you want to you want to go you just want to vanish into a black hole to escape the wrath of mitzi there's nothing like it I've ever experienced so she's like go up to your fucking office you want me to get get me she wanted me to get

something on the office so like I go running up to the office I'm just like well I'm definitely getting fired there's no question about it I'm done here and I got up to I got up to the office and you know to get up to the talent office or I don't know where do you where do you work now I think it's in the same one it's not all the way at the top where Polly's office that used to be the talent coordinator that used to be it so Polly's office used to be the talent coordinator's office that's where at the time this is before Polly moved in there so I go through you unlock like you have to unlock two doors to get there right it's where the root so you were inside where the roof access was or were you on the other side where the bigger spaces that bigger space

that was it okay so a lot of like doors you have to unlock to get there and a lot of lights you have to turn on sure still so I run into my office and I'm grabbing whatever the thing is you want it I don't even know what it was but from the other there's an office right next to that something just starts pounding on the fucking wall man like the what what time was this during the this is during the show this is during the show is night but no one could I unlock I was the one who unlocked the doors unless someone was like secretly hiding after the doors have been locked which is equally creepy but something someone's like the wall is you could see the wall shaking I don't know what the fuck that was but I was so terrified of Mitzi that it was less

frightening than what was happening to me I'm just like oh great this is when the ghost happens rent I didn't look in the office to see what it was I just ran downstairs so I don't know what that was probably a comic tricking me who knows but the other one the other one man hallway of the belly room so for you okay go on that's where I always hear stories about that's where it's at that hallway for you guys who haven't been to the comedy store there's an upstairs room called the belly room it's like a 90 cedar wonderful wonderful cool room but there's a hallway that leads to from the green room to the to the belly room so do you want to give a backstory on that room itself you give the backstory well I don't I can't verify I've I've always been enamored by that story but

I've never been able to verify if it's true the abortion yeah yeah so supposedly back room abortions were giving given up which is botched abortions yeah that's the ironic belly yeah belly room that's why they're being called the belly room even though I don't think that was I think it was I think it was about belly last but I wouldn't put it past Mitzi to to have some sort of double well we just who knows who knows who knows what it what and one thing about Mitzi is she was always big on she didn't want to change a thing about that building you always you know I hear all these stories from different parts of the building because when Mitzi bought the property they would say oh you know this is from Ciro's and it was there was a lot of mob connection to it oh yes

Mickey Cohen and I was told that she didn't want to change a lot so there's I don't know so that would make sense there's bodies in the wall yeah but she um so I mean she would like paint there's a fire hydrant in front of the club and she would always have uh does Juan Carlos still work yeah absolutely so she would have Juan Carlos paint it silver in front of the club so he'd go and paint the the he would paint the fire hydrant silver and then there was this endless war between her and the fire department who would come out and paint it yellow again how is she not did she get fine how is that like nothing she's above the law she's above the law I think they probably thought was funny I guess but nothing ever happened but that was a thing okay the hydrant Juan Carlos

so so uh she so um she uh yeah so the other ghost experience was hallway hallway bedroom I'm sitting in the green room waiting to go up because that's when I first started working out there she started giving me spots in the belly room on on Fridays and that's where I I got to learn to that's where I got to have a regular place to try out stand up for years so she um she uh so I'm sitting I'm sitting there looking down the hallway and these two people are in a fight right and they're like I don't know what they're in a fight over but they're just stipulating and you know it's a really passionate fight in this standing in the hallway so they stop fighting and walk away and I'm just sitting there and then I look up two completely different people

are standing in the exact spot in the same fucking fight man the same kind of hand gestures the same motion and that to me was the ghost which is like there was something there like some kind of energy like an imprint an imprint something that just that's what I I love that theory about when people explain ghosts is is just well it's if there is if it does exist it does it has to be just energy yeah um but yeah that's fascinating I've heard yeah I've heard stories about that hallway about an orb where they see in an orb like a this just like a like a fog like an almost like this they call it the the white lady the the white lady or something I don't know what the something's in there but that's terrifying yeah it's it's crazy and and like when you're

working there at night my god locking up no thanks I hated that no thanks you've been there for five years yeah five what were you doing before I used to manage the improv in Arizona in Tempe okay and I was there for about seven years wow yeah and then I moved out I'm from LA so I'm from I'm from the San Fernando Valley and I was born in San Monica race in the valley moved out to Arizona stayed out I was supposed to just be out there for a couple years but ended up staying for about 10 and then moved back home and then started working at the comedy store almost immediately I heard they were looking for a manager I didn't even apply someone just said hey someone's looking for a manager um and I went in and interviewed and I got hired as an assistant manager and you've been

in comedy then for basically your whole working life we haven't had a job outside of comedy yeah I used to be I used to be an assistant to Amy Heckerling the director I was her PA for oh that was only for like a year then I worked at the entertainment television I was always in the industry for the most part then I moved to Arizona I just started bartending did you ever entertain the idea of like doing stand up I did stand up for like five months okay just to see what it was like just to like kind of face some fears it's not I've I have pretty bad stage fright I would have to drink pretty heavily before I got on stage right there's a great no conducive it's not sustainable it's certainly not sustainable I tried to sustain it without comedy it's not

sustainable either way for me but I just uh I gave it a shot it was fun highest highs lowest lows I know what it's like yeah to try it um but now not into it not for me no no no no performance desire no like really you know I've done it you know I used to do this podcast with Norm MacDonald who like he's still one of my favorite stand-up comics of all time I think he's the funniest guy I've ever met and we had I had so much fun doing that I was a sidekick on there and we would write these opening sketches together it was really fun um and then I um I don't but no I don't really have any desire to act or perform um David Spade just made he uh he made Joe dirt too recently yeah and he always gives me shit because my voice I do I sound like Buffalo Bill oh yeah

so uh he had a part for this young Buffalo Bill so I flew he flew me out there and I did this part in Buffalo in our Joe dirt too and that was it was so fun it was a fun experience it was amazing yeah it was so fun but no but that was yeah it's just a fun experience it was really cool but I have no no it's not for me now you so you grew up in LA yeah and we've talked about this a little bit but apparently you are a bit of a miscreant huh yeah well I had you know is that the right word miscreant is that even a word you are all better than I wanted to say cretin but miscreant came out I don't even think that's a word let me look at that miscreant oh yeah that's a word a person who behaves badly yeah so you are so that was me me yeah so you were a little cretin a cretin yeah there

we go so what when when did so when did that start like I guess I started when my parents separated so I was I was right after my bar mitzvah I was probably about 14 or 14 when I started acting out a little bit I would get in fights at school and then I started I was always kind of self-destructive I mean I'm a huge smiths fan so I was always I was a cutter oh so I I would cut on myself a lot and then my parents sent me to a like a psych ward I would get sent away there and then when was the first time you started cutting I think I was about I think it was 13 almost 14 do you remember why you did it I think it was for attention for sure it had to be for attention it wasn't because of some you know some people some people who cut they just are numb apparently and I felt numb but I think

maybe it started out that way but then I realized all the attention I got from it and I wasn't really getting much okay I gained a lot of weight I was very depressed I was being made fun of its school and it was like it was a part an outlet for my you know pain and aggression whatever but then it turned into I think it had to be mostly for attention so you were kind of like a goth right like I didn't dress off maybe on the inside yeah yeah it was a goth on the inside you have brothers or sisters I have once a younger sister and then a half brother and a half sister okay so your parents your mom divorced yeah and my dad married someone else and had a couple kids later and you stayed with your mom or your dad I stayed with my mom mostly when was the divorce I was

probably 14 14 that's a rough one yeah so yeah that's a tough yeah it's a tough age right yeah and then I started cutting on my face like on my cheeks and stuff with the and so eventually they told me you know if I if I had if I did it again and then I yeah I punch holes and walls I was I was an angry kid I didn't have any yeah um because the divorce is like it's not just like the divorce happens when you're 14 that's not like just like your parents are getting along and then there's this oh well we're gonna divorce yeah exactly there's a lot of lead up a lot of build up yeah there's a lot of build up and that build up is not pleasant that's a turbulent thing because your parents it's not working and so here are these two people who are in this insanely stressful situation of

having kids yeah and they're not getting along anymore and there's a lot of reasons I don't know why with your parents oh yeah well my dad you know I remember going to Betty Ford Center so he had a lot of drug and alcohol problems and then he got sober and then as soon as he got sober he left my mom wow yeah um but then um but then yeah I just kept fucking up I just kept fucking up and then uh they sent me away to this this boarding school they they threatened it but I didn't think it would ever happen and it was just this boarding school now what's it called it's called C2 how did they hear about it they heard about it through some counselors at the psych at the Northridge psych war whatever the I don't even know what the how long how long were you in the psych ward for uh shit I was there

three three times the first time was probably for about a week the second time was maybe two weeks and then the third time was like a day or two before they uh took me out of there and sent me to uh to this boarding school did you like the psych ward no it was horrible I was roommates with this kid who claimed he was a gang member I remember one day I woke up and we we got into some altercation it was like a one-sided I didn't even realize we were just like like sort of we weren't we were just sort of making fun of each other but it started off playfully and then I remember waking up and he had a belt around my fucking neck and he was just choking me it was insane you're in a yeah I know right I was totally forgot I was in psych work uh but

yeah it was just fucking I didn't belong there I was just like why Jewish kid from the suburbs and then I'm like rooming my room is this this guy gang member he said he killed people and shit he had tats all over he's 13 year old with tats all over him it's crazy uh but then yes so then they were like hey you fuck up again we're you know we're not taking you to there we're taking you to this uh boarding school you're gonna be there for for a couple years and what does C.D. stand for uh it's it's so bizarre because it's not even it's not it's see yourself as you want to be and then do something about it okay but it's not spelled C it's not spelled the way it should be it's spelled C-E-D-U see who you are see how you want to be and then do something about it so

sounds sounds kind of like tough love oh yeah so this is so you're sent to you you've been cutting your face yeah you've been getting in fights right you're you're you're you're sent to a boarding school where is the boarding school it's in the San Bernardino mountains so you're sent to a boarding school in the San Bernardino mountains and what is so what is that like who drove you there my parents drove me there how was that drive they told me I was just going to tour it I said we're just gonna go check it out um and uh did they have you pack your bags or anything no they packed it I didn't realize you didn't know the bag was in the trunk yeah so they tricked you yeah for sure but I heard I heard much later uh that they did this to a lot and that's how they they did this to most of the

students this is so when your parents called C.D.U. yeah and said listen we've got to do something our kid's cutting his face he's getting in fights they're like here's what you do pack his bags put it in the trunk tell him it's for a tour and then we're gonna kidnap him exactly yeah I mean a lot of people there they you know sometimes they they hire these guys these basically these goons that would come in the middle of the night and grab the kid and and just that's C.D.U. I heard about that they'd grab them and they and they'd like cuff I don't know if they cuff them or they they do something to restrain them in the car and drive them up the fucking mountain because you have no rights as a kid I can't no absolutely not some kids were there on court orders it was bizarre

it was a really weird mix but then there were some really like affluent people like I heard Paris Hilton was there at one point very briefly so it's just this really bizarre mix of Bette Midler center kid there Roseanne Barr center yeah there so you you you so you you get there with your parents and does someone come out to greet you or yeah they had these and everybody there it looked like it was like the fucking it was like I don't know how to describe I mean sort of like a Stepford wife sort of thing where everyone looked like they were all they were all clearly drinking the Kool-Aid everyone had the same haircut and they wore the same it wasn't uniform but they all had the same sort of structure to the dress code and it was just bizarre cold cold

cold very cold so everyone's going to dress the same some people come out to that your parents car to greet you or we pull up and then we walk toward yeah someone greeted us at the car I think someone from the some counselor one of the counselors I can't remember who it was and then man woman man it was a woman okay and then they had me go with this this student and he showed me around the school and told me a little bit about it and it just sounded fucking bizarre I thought it was like a scared straight thing I was like oh man when I go back I'm not fucking up again I'm not coming here and then after the tour I went back to the administration building and I went and I got in the room with my parents and they and that's when

they let me know that I that they were leaving me there what did they say uh they told me that they were sorry and that they they didn't know what else to do and looking back I kind of I get it I totally get it they didn't know what else to do with me but um they didn't know no they didn't know what this place was they didn't know no they didn't realize where they were leaving you exactly and I just said I said fuck you and then I stormed out and they left and then that was it and then I was there for yeah about three years when you stormed out did they grab you or something or no the the kid was there and he just sort of walked with me and then uh we he walked me up to the dorm and then my bags were waiting up there for me oh no I got strip search first I got strip

searched so who's oh fuck so you tell your parents hey fuck you man yeah this is a this is fucked you walk out yeah someone strip search yeah so they're like hey come this way we were walk we walked up to the dorm and then and then once I calm down they're like all right we let's go back down to the house and this house by the way this house it was such a it's such a weird mix of it's this gorgeous cabin in the woods but all this fucked up shit about it that surrounds it but it's this cabin that um the Houston's it was like Angelica Houston when she was like 12 or 13 and her dad and Walter and John Houston and they had this gorgeous cabin so that's where the school was founded was in this this guy he was like a cult leader named Mel Wasserman okay he started

this school was he that was he still alive at that time he visited a cult yeah he visited a two or three times and he was very he had a real cult leader uh or about him but not in the traditional more of like a uh someone that like more like an evangel like uh he was he was collecting some he he did it more for them at that point I don't know how it started maybe it was for power I'm sure every cult leader has their their different motivations but his his at that time was was strictly about was financial he just wanted to get rich he wanted to get rich and he was doing it by creating this boarding school for was it boys and girls there yeah a co-ed how did how did they keep you guys from fucking they did well they I I didn't um but everyone I it seemed like every

week someone else they you would you would they had all these different this lingo like you would cop out for dirt meant you were you were um telling you were virtually telling on yourself you every week you had to write a dirt list and then you'd write like I didn't uh I didn't have my feet on the floor at 6 a.m. or I didn't dust underneath my shelf today or and then all the way up to I had sex with Susie down by the farm or you know and so it's like every week and they'd have these raps that were like these three hour intense uh primal scream therapy sessions where you would uh you would you'd have to like hash it out with people so like there was no violence no any altercations had to be taken care of in these raps so if you had a problem with someone you had

to wait until Monday Wednesday or Friday and request to have them in your rap and then you would you would yell at them for whatever however that you felt they were wrong to you or whatever so you'd scream at the top of your lungs scream at the top of your lungs at someone you're having a problem with or you would work you would do work which which is and doing work meant you'd scream towards the floor not at the floor you'd scream towards the floor and so my first thing I ever did after I got strip searched it just so happened that there was a rap immediately that's just the way the schedule worked so I had to go into my first rap after about two hours of of being dropped off by my parents and the first thing and so this person next to me is just curled up in a ball right

and they're just sort of rocking back and forth and just sobbing a little like kind of just like softly sobbing and then it just gets louder it builds and meanwhile there's someone that gets up across the room because you can't yell at someone directly next to you you can't talk to someone next to you you have to get up and switch seats with someone across the room so someone gets up goes across the room and starts yelling at the kid next to me all the while this girl next to me on my right is is slowly rocking back and forth sobbing and then just starts screaming at the top of her lungs I hate you mom just all this fucked up shit I can't remember exactly what it was and then just all this like snot and spit I don't know if you've ever screamed or while sobbing at

the top of like with every ounce of your being while keeled over in like you know ball in a chair it just empties yeah all the fluids out of your body so someone else starts throwing all these Kleenexes before she's right as she starts screaming they just I'm like what the fuck is going on they just start throwing all these Kleenexes on the floor and then I realized it was to catch all this spit and snot just flowing out and there's just these air pockets these huge it's I've never seen anything like it air pockets because it's just this this waterfall of mucus and so it's the most disgusting thing okay okay so it's like watch it's like when you pour salt on a slug yes yeah yeah primal ooze spraying out of them and so this is something that would happen

three times a week and there were three or four people that did it in that particular wrap what were you thinking man I fucked up I'm I'm fucked I'm here for two and a half years I gotta try and find a way to get out of here I'm either gonna run away or I'm gonna convince my parents that this is not for me how could you could you communicate with your parents you have to wait two weeks before your first phone call to them and then there's faculty in the room while you talk to them so if you say one thing untoward about the school they hang up on you and you're not allowed to talk and then you lose your phone privileges so I ended up running away after about six or seven months I ran away where'd you go I went down to the nearest pay phone

and called my parents so I wasn't supervised you know and tried to get them to pull me out and then they said they weren't my mom's like sorry I'm not you have to stay there could you have left like could you have just left would you have been legally no I was only six I was only 15 so you 14 if you left the cops would have picked you up and brought you back well a lot of people ran away so it turns out that all right so most people when they ran away one day they just would be gone like there'd be um you know you work you wake up there's work crews so it's like in the everyone's in a peer group god there's someone I I'm all over the fucking place all right let me think about how to you you run away you're 15 you have no legal

rights right so that means that this place that is has now been exposed as a cult an abusive cult it bankrupt from lawsuits that means that you you you have no you are going to be taken back to a psychologically abusive physically abusive cult yeah no escape so you can't get away you were in a hope you would be if you left if you if you hung up on your mom and just kept going down the mountain or wherever you were at you're still a fugitive you're a fugitive that will be brought back to this place and everyone all right so people were constantly escaping and then brought back after a various amount of time so you know after a week someone would come back and then one day they'd be in a wrap and they would be on what's called a full time if you ever broke a major

agreement they don't call them rules they call them agreements because you may whatever yeah right there's always a lingo but anyway if you if you had sex or you split or you you know did anything major or you didn't even or if you just didn't work on yourself and they thought that you were just coasting by and not screaming at the floor enough or whatever then they would put you on what's called a full time which means that from the minute you wake up you're only allowed to talk to your big brother which is the person you're paired up with when you first start who's an older student right um and that's the only person other than staff that you're allowed to talk to look at and you're not allowed to laugh you're not allowed to smile you're not allowed to sing

um and you just have to work all day which means that it's usually on a stump there was this big stump in every day there'd be a kid on there with a pickaxe working on the stump which was futile because it was there for years that no one ever was able to excavate this stump it was the biggest tree stump I'd ever seen so you did that all day and then when you came inside you had to do these writing assignments which were like three pages each which was I hate my dad because I hate my mom because I am sad because I'm angry because and then you write your life story and all this shit and then you do dishes at night then you go to sleep and then you wake up the next day and you do it all over again how many hours of sleep you getting uh I think six okay six um and

then uh and then you were there for until the staff said okay you're done and there was no time frame it was just whenever they felt that you had done uh what you needed to do to get off your full time well when do you get released from the school itself like oh it's a two and a half year program but if you ever if you split so you you go through the school program which what with what is known as your peer group and that's all the students who are enrolled around the same two or three month period as you were um so my peer group started with about uh 20 students and when we graduated I think it was about 10 um people who either pulled out or they dropped a peer group so what you do is you go through these things called profits with your peer group and that's once every two months it's

sort of like a rite of passage this this emotional growth 24 hour long workshop which we're all based on uh chapters in uh Khalil Gabron's the prophet okay so there was the first ones called the truth and it's all about how the truth will set you free and to the same degree you feel joy to the same degree you feel sorrow and you have uh and the staff is in there with you and they're they're telling all their darkest secrets and you're telling all of your and it's all about truth and you're and you're divulging all the things you've ever done that you felt bad about I was molested I molested I did this I did that I let the dog like mayonnaise off my car I've heard shit like that and then the staff had these fucked up disclosures so these are the people who they hired to facilitate

they said they were they weren't therapists they weren't psychiatrists they were untrained psychotic so what kind of they I heard guys who who raped who uh one one guy who lit a homeless guy on fire you heard that yeah another one um choked killed would strangle cats is this were they telling the truth yeah absolutely a thousand percent so you're sitting in a room with these people who are your supervisors yes and they're they're admitting to crimes that they should be in jail for absolutely yes yes definitely and it's insane it was fucking insane and you're telling them your deepest secrets yeah because if you didn't you my at least for me the only motive my biggest motivation was I don't want to stay here a fucking day longer than I have to and if I need and so

if that means then I gotta go through the motions and I gotta do what's expected of me then I will do whatever the fuck that means and I'm not dropping a peer group by staying another because if you drop a peer group that adds six months to your sentence yeah and so then if you and if you split like my buddy my best friend going through there was an originally in my peer group and ended up staying an extra year longer a year and a half I think Jesus because he kept leaving he kept splitting or he kept fucking people and then he would get sent away to these these these 42 day programs in the woods like a scent and all those shit like outward bound type places yeah you had to like survive like cook rats and shit to live and and just hike through the fucking woods for

42 days and then come back and you find out and when you come back it's like you just added time to your sentence now you're in another peer group you have to go through the same bullshit holy it's a nightmare yeah it's crazy now when I was researching this it appears that there were two kids who vanished yeah so all the time so like I know students who killed themselves there there was a girl who uh she was in the peer group below me and she had anorexia bulimia and she um she cut she uh slid her own throat in the dorm and died and uh with what with um scissors I think it was scissors um and then there was another kid who jumped off a cliff he lived but it was fucked up man um then there were people because it was up on the mountain so there was either the front

entrance which you have a much better chance of getting caught or being seen or you go down what's what was known as the backside which is virtually just down a mountain and there were a couple kids who were never found they they split and um we there was always legend had it that they had had fallen down the backside and were never found and died um but then about five or six years ago these articles came out and it was uncovered that there was a serial um molester and killer this murderer who was roommates and partners with one of the therapists this outside therapist who would come and visit once every couple months and he confessed um god what the fuck was his name I can't remember it came out five years ago it was huge news for everyone in in the in the

cdu community and so uh so it turns out that that that he was um connected to one of the there was in in particular one of the kids who went to the middle school there and and we always thought he died going down the backside um but they they think that this guy was was the guy who killed him and he would come and he while I was there this guy would come up every two months I know I don't remember what he looked like I never met him I don't think um a serial fucking killer yeah was coming up there listen man holy there is no there was no like they had no uh it was insane they didn't they didn't do any like um screening there was no like in-depth interviews like this is an important position that people are applying for and they didn't think like oh maybe we should

see these people's credentials do they have any training do they have experience or schooling or anything they have no education in this they they killed those kids oh yeah they killed those kids well I mean a lot three of my very close friends it was I don't want to say I I don't know if it was the school I mean a lot of people were there for you know these aren't good great kids who were well adjusted to get sent there in the first place but I don't I don't know a lot of them killed themselves immediately following uh cdu so they left cdu and killed themselves yeah I remember my big brother one of my dorm heads um one of my very close friends there and he hung himself uh about six or seven months after leaving another no it's all right and then another kid who um

jumped off a cliff about three or four months after leaving cdu so it's like I don't know I don't a lot of these people hold on so tightly much like we were discussing and here's a good tie into the comedy stores a lot of these people that held on they hold on so tightly to how they feel they've been longed and it and it holds them back in life right so I always make sure that for whatever reason I try not to I just look at it as something that I experience I don't want to I'm not trying to um I'm not trying to hold on that tight to this right you you you yeah and I I can I can see that you don't it doesn't seem like you are but then but I have nightmares sure I have nightmares every week about it for sure yeah man this is PTSD like if you since then if you um

thought about maybe getting like some therapy or yeah I went to therapy yeah I mean I I've been in since my god I mean I did so much fucking therapy up there right like now I need therapy about the therapy some of the extra like you some of these exercises they made you do were so insane like what they were so intense fuck man there was like oh god they would do it was a lot of like similar tactics to like um person of war like there there would be um sleep deprivation and um um uh fucking I'm so inarticulate but what's sound the sound um where they play the same song and really oh yeah I I read about that I don't know what that's called but I read about that what what song would they play a lot of the same songs um I I can't I don't ever want to hear imagine

ever again I can't if John Lennon yeah I can't ever hear that again so they would play imagine I'm not gonna sing no it's fine but yeah they would play that a lot and then a lot of John Denver it's the worst is that a nightmare or what oh fucking that alone holy shit that in itself is a fucking nightmare so you are in I want to live you aren't allowed to sleep so they you're you so you're not allowed to sleep right you are in a 24 hour yeah and the staff is just berating you you're a whore you're you're a monster you're just gonna go out here and get gang fucked and you're a little like they would say that to the girls and then the guys would be like you know you're gonna be dead in a week you're a piece of shit you're nothing and then in the morning they'd

build you they try and build you back up and while that's happening they're playing take me home country yeah no so they would play um the long and winding road or um he ain't heavy he's my brother that they would play that constantly uh look what they've done to my soul like all these fucking weird songs it was terrifying listen man the rocky song they'd play and like you'd have to write a script for your life you got to write a screenplay about this it'd be a good show this is a this if this why is this this is a series this should be a series this is like lost this is the most I've never heard before you told me about this I'd never heard of it it's pretty crazy what happened to the people who are running this thing they're on facebook you can find them what yeah

it's fucking crazy no they're not in jail there's no what are they doing now they're on facebook they're fucking posting photos of what they just ate at chipotle or whatever what about what was the main guy's name well mel wasserman what happened to wasserman I don't know I wonder if he's dead he's kind of be I'm a he's either incredibly old or he's dead uh I don't know what happened to him you know what the best fucking alright so wait this is the only other one I'll say there was one that always sticks with me more than any other exercise we had to do in one of these profits and this one actually was the last two profits are actually three day workshops which you get like three hours sleep on each day Jesus and this one one was three day one was five

day and in the five day one towards the end you had to do they called it the lifeboat and they picked two students and I was one of them and you sit in a chair and then the other guy sat in the chair next to you and you're in a lifeboat and all the other students are sitting around you and you can only pick uh one student make it on the lifeboat and everyone else dies and then you have to tell them you have to look everyone in the eye and tell them why they die you'd be like you you die because I think you're selfish or whatever the fuck and it's like everyone's just sobbing and looking at you in the eye and you have to tell them and it reminded me a lot of me be doing these fucking lineups I have to fucking tell people sorry man I don't have any spots for you this way you know

what you should do man instead of telling people you don't have spots for them you should just calm up and play John Denver and they'll just know just so real quick man just so we can connect everything so you leave this place how old are you when you get out 16 and what do you do I went back to high school I had to go back in high school I mean shit it was it was quite a change it's hard to adjust because also I went to this I got sent to this uh thrown into this public school and I and I was stuck in this place where you weren't allowed if you even said the words the rolling stones you'd have to do dishes you couldn't listen to music or any music that had anything to do with drugs or right or sex or anything so it was like you could listen to John

Denver and fucking Otmar Liebert or some shit and that's what they would play um but the uh it was it was just sort of like culture shock I was you know I I didn't it was like I was in a fucking coma it was like I was in some sort of fucking David like a David Lynch dream the black that was my own lodge that was my other black lodge so you come out of this thing year how long again two years two years about two and a half to three two and a half to three years of the most incredible psychic abuse yeah that like prisoner of war level psychic abuse your you what did you say to your folks how did you I didn't tell him about it you didn't tell him no so after I tried to at first and then once someone made this documentary about it and then my mom via Facebook or something

that's where she's heard about and then she saw it and she that's when she really appalled she's like I had no idea I was like that's okay wow so you you um you're in now you're in public school yeah and you got to just pretend like you're you know everything's okay yeah and I and it was just this I had never I had uh and it was like it was a school in the valley I didn't know any you know I didn't know anybody uh whoever my ice cube went there it was like it was it was it was Taft Taft High School all right and so um I don't know I didn't know anybody plus on top of that I didn't know who the fuck anybody was like I didn't I didn't understand and I was still like you've been at time where who the yeah I felt like I was like uh still I just felt so out of

place man on so many levels I felt really out of place because I had just gotten out too so I didn't know shit and I was wearing like I didn't know how to dress I didn't know how to act it was weird but it but it was good but it but I think it all it all worked out it worked out because you and so you you graduate from high school yeah college uh I did I did a lot of college but nothing it just just for I took a lot of film classes and stuff stuff that interests me music and film and now you are but you're you're at the comedy store and it's so weird this kind of there's like a strange parallel there isn't there definitely wow the two I consider them both my black lodge they're both fucking lodges and the nuts but the difference is man you're turning

the comedy store into this and what your energy in that place oh it's totally group f I really appreciate that but honestly but it's just uh I just I I'm lucky to have all these amazing comics that call in every week and I honestly just try and put together the best fucking lineup I can I just want to do it based on who I think are the funniest or the biggest draws and then like I said towards the end of the lineups I just want to make sure that I give those young comics a chance to develop just like the comics who came before them you're doing it man I mean it's it's really cool I and I you're the only one I know that I that I talk to that understands what it's like and so I am so lucky that anytime listen man any thank you and anytime you start uh anytime you need

to talk to somebody give me a call man because I've been there you know I've been up in that I've been in that building for for many years and I've been where you're at and not many people I think understand what that's like uh so wow though man cool thank you so much for sharing this with me absolutely an amazing story I feel like we just only scratch the surface man thank you this is great great um wonderful well guys listen go see uh go see adam at the comedy store go see him through his awesome lineups go to the comedy store and thank you very much for being on the show man thanks so much thanks for listening everybody if you like this episode give us a nice rating on itunes won't you you can follow adam on twitter by going to at adam

eget adam eget and a big thank you to casper.com for sponsoring this episode go to casper.com forward slash family hour use offer code family hour to get $50 off a brand new mattress don't forget to bookmark our amazon portal and don't forget to bookmark your heart because that's where you should be living from my angels and angelettes I'll see you next time Hare Krishna Wendy's $3 breakfast deal is a bacon or sausage air croissant plus small season potatoes for three bucks it's the breakfast that don't miss so if you did miss Wendy's breakfast don't imagine first cracked eggs sizzling sausage crispy bacon and block out those hot buttery flaky croissants croissants don't really make a sound but if they did for breakfast that don't miss

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