Duncan Trussell Family Hour - Daniele Bolelli

Episode Date: September 9, 2017

Fresh in from THE BURN Duncan retells his harrowing encounter with one of the Kardashians and is joined by Daniele Bolelli (History On Fire, Create Your Own Religion) who soothes us by recounting our murderous and diseased past that makes our modern sorrows seem like a fart in a bubble bath. SUPPORT THE DTFH ON PATREON Daniele's web site

Ghost Towns, Dirty Angel, out now. I'm dirty little angel. You can get Dirty Angel anywhere you get your music. Ghost Towns, Dirty Angel, out now. New album and tour date coming this summer. Welcome everyone, you are listening to the Dugga Trussell Family Hour podcast. If you listen closely in the background,

you can hear my neighbor's dog screaming. Do you hear that? That's the least appealing bark I've ever heard in my life, the poor thing. That's the bark that you hear as your oarsman is carrying you across the river sticks into hell. The dog sounds like it just read the Necronomicon.

Christ. This is why I wish that we had some kind of dog to English translator, because I'd love to know what is troubling it. Aside from the fact that it has been stolen by monkey descendants and chained in a cold yard for the entirety of its existence. This is a great podcast today.

It's with my dear friend, Daniela Bielelly. We're gonna get right to it. First, some quick business. The Dugga Trussell Family Hour podcast is brought to you by Shore Design T-shirts. My God, these shirts are so fucking soft. One of the saddest things you'll ever hear is that when JFK was initially assassinated

and his brains went splattering all over Jackie Kennedy, the first thought that came into her mind was they're so soft and warm. And then she thought, oh my God, this is definitely the worst day of my life and went a little crazy. That's the feeling you get when you wear a Shore Design T-shirt.

This doesn't seem like a great selling point for these shirts. This might be the worst Shore Design T-shirt commercial I've ever done. I'm gonna try it again. I was in New Orleans. My brains are mush right now. My brain is a quicksand pit filled with the rotting corpses of Boy Scouts right now.

And apparently it's very dark in there because all of this sounds so dark. I've gotta lighten up the mood. This is a great podcast with Daniela Bielelly. Just wade through this sticky, swampy ooze that's coming out of me right now and I swear to God, it's not gonna be this kind of whatever this is.

I feel great. I don't know why I sound depressed. I feel pretty good. Helicopter. I feel like I live in fucking Vietnam. Do you hear that? Not Vietnam the country, but Vietnam the war. Helicopters screaming dogs.

Unidentified weird tentacly shadows floating over my neighbor's roof. The Ducket Trussell Family Hour podcast is brought to you by Shore Design T-shirts. Shore Design T-shirts creates some of the softest shirts in the business. It's as though you have not just shaved off Santa's beard, but as those Santa's beard got caught

in one of his elf's machines and was torn off along with the very top layer of his facial skin. That's how soft these shirts are. It's not just the softness of Santa's beard, it's the softness of that very thin bit of skin that exists right above Santa's nerves. Santa would be an agonizing pain after this accident,

but whatever lucky elf got to wear that wonderful shirt made of his beard and skin flesh, that elf would feel pretty great. Go to ShureDesignT-shirts.com if you put my name and you will get 10% off of these beautiful shirts. They've got amazing designs. They are incredibly soft and they are made by one of the coolest people on earth,

Bennett, a man who was not afraid to kill the father of Christmas, skin and cremate him so that you can wear a comfortable shirt when you're sweating out those toxins at your beaker yoga sessions. So go to ShureDesignT-shirts.com and pick up one of these wonderful shirts. We're also brought to you by Amazon.com.

Now Amazon does this, I'm not sure why they do it. I know I've said this before, but they do a thing where if you go through our Amazon portal, which is located at DuncanTrussell.com and buy anything from Amazon, they give us a small percentage of whatever you bought. Oh, the things I've bought from Amazon. Just this last week, Japanese bondage ropes

and a Batman outfit for my dog. So there's a lot of great things you can get at Amazon.com and before you do it, please go to DuncanTrussell.com and go through our portal. Cost you nothing. They mysteriously will give us a small percentage of whatever it is that you buy. As soon as whoever runs Amazon comes out

of the alcoholic blackout that made them think that was a good idea, this thing will end. But while it is still happening, you can support the DuncanTrussell Family Hour podcast while supporting yourself. And they've got everything that you need. Everything that you need. Except for the bondage ropes you put under your bed.

We're also brought to you by Audible. Audible sells some of the greatest audio books in the world. And I'm currently listening to a Pima Children audio book that is blowing my mind. And that audio book is called Awakening Love. And if you sign up for a trial membership at Audible, you will get this book for free. It's 36 hours.

And it's one of the, it is the greatest breakdown of Buddhism that I've ever listened to. Pima Children, might be mispronouncing your name, has a really amazing way of articulating some really complex ideas. And it's very subtle and you don't realize that really what's happening until a few hours later,

you realize she's like revealed something that you've wondered about for a long time, but it can never figure out. God, man, I sound dumb right now. Well, it's called Awakening Love, Pima Children. And you get the book for free if you go to audibletrial.com forward slash family hour and sign up for a trial membership.

And I couldn't recommend this more. I mean, I guess I could, but it would sound weird probably to recommend it more. See, man, you shouldn't drink. That's what you can take away from this, what you're hearing right now. You shouldn't drink for five days straight. Finally, if you wanna support

the Dugga Trussell Family Hour podcast, you can go to our shop. We just got, we're getting new logo t-shirts in, those sold out. We have a bunch of other shirts, posters, stickers. We're gonna be getting some new merchandise in soon. I just haven't figured out what that is yet. Oh, and you can also of course donate to the podcast

if you really feel like going nuts. Oh yes, this is what I was trying to remember. Also, I released a special bonus episode, a Halloween episode. It's two bucks, you can get it on iTunes. You can also get it through the website. You don't just have to listen to this episode because it's Halloween,

but it was made more for Halloween. But it's pretty great because my dear friend, the pickup artist Snake shows up. Alpha Duncan, which is the version of me with way too much testosterone, shows up. I read my favorite Edgar Allen Poe story and there's much, much more. I think it might have infuriated some people

because it's satanic, the whole episode's satanic. Cause it's Halloween, you know, fuck. What's scarier than Satan? I figured I'd be scary and put some satanic stuff in. So if you're offended by that stuff, don't listen. The Thanksgiving bonus episode, I think it's gonna won't be a satanic, maybe just a little satanic, but that's there for you too.

And it's a way for you to support the Duncan Trussell Family Hour podcast. So thank you. Those of you who bought the bonus episode, those of you who've been donating, those of you who've bought shirts, those of you who support short design t-shirts or go through the Amazon portal.

And to those of you who just listen or go on the message board and those of you who send me awesome emails, forgive me if I haven't responded to you. I read all of them though, and they always make me feel really good. And to those of you who have sent me angry emails, whoever you may be, I don't know what to say.

I hope that your brain turns into a snake and choose your heart out. See, gotta quit drinking. I had stopped drinking because I was on a diet and I felt great. But when you go to New Orleans, you have to drink. It's just a rule.

If you don't drink in New Orleans, then you can't really see the angels that live in New Orleans. All you'll see is giant pools of vomit and roaches crawling through your food. But if you drink in New Orleans, then suddenly it becomes a magical wonderland filled with dirty strippers and voodoo priestesses.

It's a wonderful place. Well, it's actually one of my favorite cities. Today's guest on the Dunkin' Trussell Family Hour podcast is a philosopher, a teacher, an author. He has his own podcast, The Drunken Taoist. It's located at the drunkendawist.com. Of course, Taoist is spelled with a T. All the links to his books, his Twitter,

and his podcast will be located at dunkintrussell.com in the comments section of this podcast. Now, everyone, please embrace and love this wonderful human being and thank the great eternal Godhead for geysering out the spray of particulates that eventually coalesced into a planet that eventually coalesced into amoeba-like primordial ooze,

which eventually coalesced into symbiotic relationships with other oozing primitive sludge-like beings which eventually transformed into ancient, sharp-toothed beaver creatures living at the edge of time which eventually transformed into the dinosaurs, which eventually transformed into oil, which eventually transformed into plastic, and eventually transformed into the recording device

given to me by the wonderful Dr. Chris Ryan, and eventually transformed also into a Daniella Bollelli who eventually came on this podcast again. So whatever I just said, do that. And Hare Krishna, everyone, here is Daniella Bollelli. ["Welcome Back to the Podcastв שימemb packet that you will live a foot chill to be welcomed in you grin to shake hand, but always又 메이크업 שירושההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההההhaulההההההההההההה Wasn't your boy really listening though, even when yesterday to give people out there an idea of the genesis of today's episode, I was

peacefully sleeping in my bed and I heard this cavernous deep voice yelling at me Daniela, I'm like what the fuck you know who's there what you know I'm half asleep I'm all out of it and they're like Daniela you need to record a podcast with Duncan like who the fuck are you again you know who's talking to me and he's like I'm the universe man capital you and everything you motherfucker just get with the program I'm gonna implode unless you have another podcast with Duncan because it's been way way too long so get on with it way too long thank you universe for making that happen you know it did it is funny that you emailed me saying the universe it compelled you to want to do a podcast with me because I was thinking to myself how I didn't

have a podcast to put out this week and because I was in New Orleans and I was feeling quite like a like a piece of shit for not doing that so this is awesome the way that worked out I'm glad you're I'm glad that you are in contact with the universe yeah the universe was very very worried about your self-esteem and so they figured out Duncan may feel bad about himself not recording for a week so come on go to Duncan already self-esteem oh my god man wouldn't you love to just like get rid of that whole thing altogether self-esteem isn't embarrassing self-esteem or isn't embarrassing when you feel slighted yeah because I mean it's not when you have it big deal right you don't even think about it when you don't have it you realize what you're lacking every

fucking second of the day right because you feel like everything you don't feel up to par with anything you keep feeling like I fall short of how I should be blah blah blah it sucks it's like being sick you know like when you're healthy you don't think about it but every second you're sick you're thinking about damn how good it is to be healthy yeah when you're insecure you're like a human black hole you're just trying to suck people from people affirmation that you're an okay thing you know like how you like when you have sometimes when you have I don't know this probably never happens to you but you know sometimes when you have sex and oh that never happens to me so yeah right I don't mean the sex part but I mean you have sex and you have the

compulsion to ask was that alright I strongly resist the compulsion but I do too but the feeling when you so then when you start finding yourself in that place where you're suddenly everything that you do is this kind of subtle manipulation right to get the person you're with to be like I think you're great I was awesome you are so amazing you rock my world oh god that is I hate being on that side of things man it's such a squirmy feeling but what is that feeling what do you think that is I mean I think is to one degree even the most secure person in the world there's some level of insecurity in everybody you know because there's always the fear of failure the fear of performance anxiety Jesus that's one of the most powerful

things out there you know whether it's public speaking whether it's sex whether it is who knows you know the idea of they're I'm gonna step out they're all gonna look at me and they're all gonna point at love because they say haha you suck it's like being in like kindergarten or something yeah is that experience that when you have it as a tiny kid pieces you off forever and stays with you yeah yeah and and and you're always depending on how you were raised that's the idea is that you're always trying to make up for in some way you're trying to to fill that gaping hole that is left in you by if you have like an over demanding parents or parents who are never satisfied with you and even if not of course you're gonna have less issues than the guy who

had that problem but even if you don't everybody likes to be liked you know everybody enjoys the you are so good blah blah blah blah blah we can pretend that we don't we can act like oh you know this fluttery I don't really care but you're totally getting off on it sometime yeah it's not getting off in a weird selfish ego way but it's like it makes you feel good it makes you feel validated that whatever you are putting your energy for other humans you may like a knowledge it and say wow that was awesome it's he's silly you know it may be silly ego but still that's life and it's yeah and when you get around somebody who really really loves you you just want to be around them all the time of course because that feeling of being around them is like the same

feeling you get when you find a heater when it's really cold outside yeah it gives you this sense of like okay I'm I've found homeostasis here this is what it's all about just this feeling that feeling is is the most is the greatest feeling absolutely it's as good as it gets that's part of the being in love experience it's not just them adoring your worship you know that's sort of the ego part but yeah the whole thing is based on this exchange of energy where you can't get enough of the other person they can't get enough of you when you're like fuck this feels so good I can't believe this yeah yeah and that goes against everything that we've been taught in capitalism right or in I'm sorry not capitalism that's a materialism materialists

are people who think that you get that same feeling from buying stuff yeah like a car jewels a nice house of course you name it there's all kinds of people who go running to the world trying to get that feeling that it's so frustrating because you can only get that feeling from another person right right right right and you can't make a person feel like that that's why there's that vicious cycle that works like clockwork in our society where people are lonely and miserable because they work too hard they don't have time and energy to put into building huge good relationships because then you're lonely and miserable but at least you have some money what do you do you go yourself and you buy yourself something cool to feel a little better about

your shitty life so then for a while you have your new toy and you're like oh this is so cool this is fun I get to play with my thing by now you spend money which means that you need to work even harder at the job you hate which then makes you even more lonely miserable which makes you more likely to want to buy something to feel a little better about your shitty life yeah and it keeps going and going and going forever right it's a perfect misery spiral that's not fun it's amazing because there's somebody at the end of that game that misery spiral who's probably well aware that you can make humans do that like in the same way if I take my dog's toy right I can make him run in circles after the toy until he gets dizzy right and it's fucking hilarious I think

somebody's doing that to a lot of people right now yeah it's almost like humans are turbines and you can make them spin in this materialistic frenzy and if you get enough human spinning in the materialistic frenzy then it will fucking power your empire it will power your this whatever you want the energy that's how you generate energy from humans right you get them to run after matter you get them to chase after material things because they think the material things will give them the feeling of love absolutely that's like the matrix except you have them running so they sweat more the matrix with more sweat that's what they're describing exactly that's what it is but yeah it's the reality is that most human beings and all of us at one point or another and most

human beings a lot of the time are so easy to manipulate you know if you really want to be the evil fucked up one we're like trying to screw over everyone else and just get what you want out of them it's really not that hard to do no because we are so we have all these buttons that you can push and we automatically respond if you push it the right way and so you already can predict oh if I do this this person is gonna respond this way I'm gonna get them to have this emotion which is gonna make that it's it's not that hard it's fucked up but it's it's not that hard right and it makes sense some it does make sense that there would be people who figured this out and and and decided to capitalize off of it and that that certainly makes sense doesn't it it doesn't seem

crazy to think about that what do you ever read the 48 laws of power yeah right he made bank with it because what is describing is not a crazy scenario I mean he's having fun playing bad boy with that but the reality is he's he's describing the way things are a lot of the time now not everybody's conscious of it not everybody's intentionally applying all of those things but a lot of that stuff that's why he resonated with people because it's it's how it is this he was trying to be Machiavelli yeah yeah yeah and he was you know part of it he was I think there's an element of sellmanship there that is like it makes you makes it more controversial if you state it without any moral judgment whatsoever just stating it exactly for what it is in this semi

Machiavellian type of way I actually had Robert Green on my part I haven't released the episode yet but I did interview him he's a really nice guy you know when you interact with him sure but he's just saying look this is the way things are learn about it how we are gonna use these ideas fucking up to you right if you want to be a power manipulating guy you do that if you want to use that just to make sure other people don't use it on you well great but he's removing the moral aspect of his like it's like I'm teaching you to me the way I conceive of it is like being a martial art teacher you know this is how you pop the elbow this is how you you know doesn't mean you go out and do it on the old lady it means these are the tools how you use them that's your

choice why do you think people have such a problem with the rules being laid out instead of being subtle or subconscious like people got mad people get mad about like I actually am not fond of of this type of literature just seems annoying but like pickup artist literature Machiavelli had the prince the laws of power anything that involves just putting out putting down clearly one specific type of social dynamic that being control dynamics or being how to manipulate other people it does have this whiff of evil to it like you're not supposed to say it right why and well I mean there are two levels one is some of the way these things can be used are objectively fucked up right there are just something that's manipulative and evil about it yeah but he's

again it's like fighting you can be use a fighting techniques to rob an old lady which means you are an evil fucked up human being you can use fighting techniques for complete you know the techniques are what they are but there's no morality attached to them is the context in which you choose to use them how you choose to use them and all of that in some cases it's obvious that the whole purpose is manipulative like the whole thing about how to essentially approaching dating as hunting yeah mark your victim kind of thing is like what kind of a sick motherfucker are you really that's that's how we approach things Jesus that's why people should enjoy the flashlight more so that when they actually choose to go for a human being they do so because they want to

because they like that person well doesn't it seem like it's kind of a the pickup artist thing is a the end product that they're going for generally seems to be fucking yeah so that's an end product is just fucking somebody so you're like sort of like you've did you sort of abandoned even honesty like a lot of them carry rings around and give rings out to girls right well you try to convey this false persona or it was all misdirects with the intention of getting to a position where you are fucking a girl among many girls that you're fucking so there's that it's like a whole culture of like you're doing great in life if you're fucking a lot of girls like right it goes all the way back to happy days remember the fawns they're like chicks falling all over him and he'd like in

his apartment there'd be five girls rolling down the steps and it's like this kind of like cartoonish sure reductionist thing where these aren't whoever these girls are that the fawns was fucking they're just they're like basically walking daisies there they don't have a nervous system even there just some kind of like flowery cartoony thing that likes to suck the fawns as cock and then vanishes into nothingness basically they don't walk they don't spend the next like three hours you know the taste of the fawns is cock in their mouth thinking about how that like wondering if like he's if he if anyone's really gonna love them or any kind of like any of the true human emotions that overcome a living thing in this universe that's not there right and that's

kind of seems like the pickup part is that's what they go for it's the way I can scam you out of the human aspect and I'll just get what I want and get out and which is like that's so fucked up to me he's like he's so beyond the is not even that I don't understand it is that it flat out in outrageous me he pisses me off yeah I find it I don't know to me is like you say you need sex good I got it no problem and you got tired of your own sweet self okay I got that too I understand the flashlight has been used too many times you know I got all that part that's what good old fashion legal prostitution should be about you are in very pleasant fashion in very polite fashion you put the money down they trade sex for money yes they you treat them nicely they treat

you nicely everybody got what they want nobody gets emotionally fucked over simple instead the whole thing that the whole idea of no I'm just gonna go out that's why to me like the dating scene is a scary weird place in that regard because I find it too many emotional games like at the end of the day I don't fucking want to have hurt anybody right you know what I mean I don't want anyone in the world to have that shit they let me down basically they hurt me they have done some of that is like that's a feeling I don't know why I don't know if it's a moral thing or not it's just to me it feels too horrible to even conceive I just don't like that feeling so maybe for selfish reason but to me it's like I never want to be in that position to the point where sometime I've done

some really weird shit because I've had a situation where I think a girl is hot totally coming on to me I still don't act on it they start putting up signs basically saying please come on now you know and it's and I'm still like she's hot she's into me and I really like her yeah I don't want to have anything to do with her why are you crazy but the fuckers like well cuz I'm not exactly sure you know maybe I end up hurting no no no thanks no thanks so I go a little overboard the other direction that's why the whole people who don't even come close to that go completely the other way and they are about really just screwing people over knowing that they are emotionally hurting people there rubs me beyond wrong yeah they're doing it but they don't there isn't I I don't I

think it's more of a isn't more of a blundering mistake it's like it's not as though I'm I know there's some guys like definitely there's some guys who went through a famine when they were in high school a lot of guys didn't have sex and they watched like total assholes get you know fuck all the time and and then you know they started fostering this resentment that and then like when they got into their 20s maybe physically they changed became a little more attractive or who knows what right and so now they're in their core they've got this sort of like anger no and so then they're just trying to exact revenge on women because they feel like they were jilted and I think that that's a small it's a it's a population but I think it's a small part of the population

it seems more like there's a blundering error a kind of blindness that they don't under a lot of people don't understand that where they're digging for water there that's not water that they're getting that's sewage but they haven't really tasted water so they're fine drinking polluted murky shit water yeah I mean a lot of evil in the world is not done by people who are the stereotypical evil dudes out there to haha how am I gonna spread evil today right it's done by people who are stupid I guess and stupid I mean not in a way like they are born that way or they are stupid in every aspect of their lives stupid about specific issues because they don't know because they have as you put it never experience anything that's like wow that feels amazing it's

beautiful so they go for this like very very very very very cheap inversion of the real thing that completely perverts what the real thing should be about that's it that's it so they're like these blind stumbling like fools they're just weird leeches sort of like crawling along the surface of the material universe sucking at anything that has just the smallest bit of energy in it because they don't realize that there's like a more profound experience I think it's got to be it that's my look that's my view of the thing most people don't get it you know when like we were just in New Orleans and this cab driver you know we were trying to get to some restaurant we got a cab and I watched the cab driver intentionally drive us around the same block a couple of times

right he was like he was saying he kept asking us the address and I'm watching him and I'm thinking oh okay you're like you're like ripping us off right now and it was interesting because it's like oh whatever it's gonna be like honestly it's gonna be eight bucks right where we're going so let's just watch this guy go through this process of stealing from the world to make it to 11 bucks yeah and let's just see what he does because it'll be curious and you can watch his face and you can kind of see he's getting off on it a little bit there's a little bit of like getting off on it and then when we got out of the cab you can kind of see that the guy feels clever too you know when we got out like he's stupid because like I was I like giving big tips to cab drivers so I would

have given him more than what he got from ripping us off anyway but he doesn't know that and he just thinks we're stupid to us and that's fine but it's just curious to watch the whole process unfold in a person who is trying to rip someone off because you could see they're not really that kind of happiness that they're getting is like not real happiness it's this kind of shade of happiness but it's not like the real joy that you can get from from giving up trying to win yeah it's the equivalent of the buying yourself something cool because you're lonely and miserable you know is that you're giving yourself this micro satisfaction because you don't fucking know what you're missing or the real satisfaction is and is when you think about it it's the same in

every department right when you look at how horrendously bad we're fucking up the world right now in terms of environment because somebody has to squeeze the resources out of it to have some more money polluting their own fucking surroundings I mean what animal is that stupid to poison the air they breathe and the water they drink you know it's just demented but it's like I'm gonna squeeze another high-rise building that I'm gonna buy thanks to this and it's like again misguided priorities to say the least yes those are the ones that create evil you know the intention may not be the your deep-seated person I may not be the ultimate evil but you end up because of misguided priorities committing a lot of evil yeah and that's where it's like

Jesus what a waste yeah what a waste what a waste because you're you're you're sort of when you get anything in mass so it's like you get these little pixels of evil or whatever you want to call it selfishness delusion in each of those pixels as a person who in their specific career or business is trying to take more than they give their philosophy is that the way they're going to take more is by deception so you get this one little pixel of deception here and another pixel of deception there another pixel of deception there but in mass that is where you could see the personification of this selfish force and it's always destructive so that's where you you know that's where you can see there's some logic behind people saying that there is a thing

called Lucifer Satan devil the worm you know whatever the name is you want to give to the force that ultimately is only interested in itself each pixel of the thing can look quite glamorous you see a yacht you see a you know a life where a person is so cultured and sophisticated and has the resources to whatever he wants and the pixel looks great but then when you look at the thing in total you just see swampy suction you just see the collapse of rainforests you see people in China not able to fucking look see their hands in front of their face because of the pollution you see you know in the United States you see the government that's collapsing because the representatives are all paid off and in mass you can see oh wow this is a multi-tenacled

super destructive entity that is plies rendering the planet to shreds yep and so that now if you look at the other side the pixels of people like you know Mother Teresa Martin Luther King Gandhi Ramdas any of the great teachers or any of the great people who've surrendered that desire to for their own self if you see imagine what the world would be like if that was the majority right the whole different game whoa yeah now it's heaven right it would be the Garden of Eden right we'd be existing on a paradise planet it would just be beautiful luxurious gardens and forests that were flourishing and you know there would be you know we can't even fucking imagine what it be like yeah cuz I mean we are really freaking smart monkeys we have the technological abilities to

make something amazing in the war today and because we're fucking idiots you know we're smart and we're stupid at the same time we're smart in terms of the device that we come up with we're stupid in terms that we don't know how to use them in a way that increase happiness but it really boils down to the fact that most people in actually out even there to say everybody in the war to swap some degree or another has to learn to be happy because I think there is a basic kid happiness but you know it comes and it's very real is very sincere is very innocent but it comes and goes because kids are rocked by their emotion back and forth but the idea of adults being able to know what it is that makes them happy what both in terms of what activities make them happy

what how to make themselves happy that to me is like the ultimate art the life is all about you know if you can learn if you can master that art there in heaven whatever you do what's your technique one thing that I find useful and one thing that I would suggest for as a starter for anybody is to keep you know a computer file a journal or whatever some piece of either paper or file somewhere that exists where you write down anytime comes to mind you write down all the things that make you happy and it can be like some that may be stuff you want to learn about some maybe things that currently you enjoy a lot so you know it's like I want to freaking learn how to start a fire in a forest okay that may not be super high on your priorities of that makes me

crazy happy but you write everything right from and after a while when you do that for a while I think you start seeing patterns of certain kind of oh it clearly emerges here that I have a big relationship with my body and activities that involve the physical body and sweating and these really help me a bunch because now I see a whole list of them maybe I should figure out how to structure my life to put more time in that yeah it seems to pay off or huh I didn't even realize it but nature seems to come up over and over again I need to fucking garden I need to do something that puts me in touch with it on a daily basis and maybe even figure out what how to do in life as something that can actually pay you to do something yeah or maybe it's not but you figure out more

the you know a lot of people when they have free time they don't know what the fuck to do it is because they are so used to having every minute of their life taken up that is like shit now I can do whatever I want I want to do is oh shit I don't remember what it means what it what it means to be me you know so in that sense even if you don't change your life dramatically you at least you can't even get enough hours in the day because there are so many things that excite you that you want to jump on that you want to have time for that you swing you can never be bored you're always in that sense every second that's not taken up by work you're having fun you're doing something that's feeding you and if you do that you're gonna be way less likely to want to screw everyone

over in order to get something out of them to fuck up the planet because you need to feel some because you're never happy and so the only way you see you can become happy is look at your bank account add numbers and that's happiness right you know if you actually figure out ways to be happy I would say that you're probably way less likely to dedicate time to being an asshole and also you're gonna find what you really are along that path and that's gonna be the thing that turns into whatever your job is I mean look at the way we start if you really it's all so funny I swear it almost seems like a super advanced intelligence encoded within the very formation of life on this earth the code the secret of happiness as we call it if you look at sperm these poor little

blind wormy things right right they get blasted out of a cock in a moment of supreme bliss ultimate happiness the person might have been the biggest asshole on earth but at least for those few seconds of orgasm right that person had joined with the universal love flow of the universe or the source of all pleasure in the universe and it become an orgasm right so so that's what you come from and then you're this blind little wormy thing that is following a kind of chemical scent right you're following this chemical scent to get to an egg and then you not this no one taught this sperm didn't take like sperm class nobody there weren't lectures and lessons there was no military base where they were training you drilled the operations you will get to that egg you will follow this

scent you will be the first it's just blundering and in a but moving in the direction it doesn't know what it's doing exactly but but man if it really tunes in then it will transform from a wormy little thing to a fucking human being right no but if you people didn't know sperm existed and you pointed to a human and said that used to be half of that used to be a little worm right that's impossible yep so in the same way it's like we have we this is why I love in Christianity a lot of those different spiritualities even in Hinduism when before you read the Bhagavad Gita the prayer that you say as I was born in the darkest of ignorance but my spiritual master opened my eyes with a torch of knowledge it's this idea of blindness complete supreme blindness

right so what you're saying writing down things that you enjoy that whatever that is that that impulse is the same impulse that when you were a tiny microscopic sperm drove you in the direction of an egg that transformed you into a thing right so much more powerful and superior to a sperm that you don't even you it's like two completely different things right so in the same way you follow those little breadcrumbs that you're talking about as silly as they might seem sure learning to build a fire which isn't that silly it's an important thing but whatever it is you follow those breadcrumbs and then the next thing you know somewhere along that path you're gonna accidentally stumble upon a book who knows what the book's gonna be or maybe you're gonna stumble

upon a person because when you start going in the direction of happiness you're gonna start finding yourself around other people who are also moving in this direction and people are going in the direction of happiness tend to want to help each other the next thing you know you're you start learning things yeah and that's how you have the potential to transform into a thing completely brand new yep make time which is why and you know you always hear in Christianity the term born again yeah that's right and unfortunately it's been blast right you know when you see a lot of these people who say they've been born again it's like well you got born the second time you were born with serious fucking disabilities man this is your second time I hate to see what the first

one was yeah what you used to be an alligator but you know of course is with all world religions and all religions they get completely corrupted destroyed by idiots but it's not just that it's even in my friend email likes this told me this story about how in Taoism somebody who asked this guy how old he was and he would say four I'm four this is probably guys 40s right but he would say I'm four and the reason he said four is because he didn't consider himself to be alive prior to his moment of awakening right what he was before that was a completely different unconscious yeah impulse thing just like a sperm right you know so so yeah that's why I love that idea it's such a beautiful idea to think that just through following your own impulses towards happiness

you can at the other side of that not just learn how to build a fire but transform into something so different than what you are right now that you will not even be recognizable you'll look back at your old life and think what the fuck was that you feel sad you're like shit was I really living that way was I not only leaving did I really feel that way damn I feel like oh I wish I could go back in time and give you a different perspective earlier you know yes because yeah ultimately that's how it goes you know that's why most people you know they pick up a job they hate they don't hate it so much that they actually want to change it but you know mildly miserable or Freud would put it normally miserable right that was the whole goal of psychoanalysis to make you

normally miserable right it's like the most people you know they go through that thing and then they finish their job and by the time all these energies been sucked out of them with no fun whatsoever and you do this long enough you don't really know what the hell to do to be happy when you are free actually when you have your free time so you just go home watch some TV watch and Jerry Springer again you know and it's like you start moving from you're really just taking up time so that soon enough eventually you'll die but you know you're not really there in the process you're just being this machine that goes from the TV set to some job you don't like back and forth without any I mean the job thing is like granted sometime you need to pay the bills you

need to pick up shitty jobs and maybe it's even hard to find something that you really deeply enjoy that pays long term I get it but then that's like eight nine hours of the day there's still another probably eight hours before you go to bed what the fuck are you gonna do with that time you know how are you gonna put the energy there if you are not able to figure out a way to fix the job so far it's well you could do I mean the job part or whatever the part is that sucks actually the part that sucks you know actually in the walking dead greatest thing ever greatest thing ever there was a quick scene there was a poster on the wall behind one of the characters and the poster and I'd never heard this phrase before but it was something like calm seas do not great sailors

make and I thought was so you know so so like so the uh instead of thinking okay the about the peaceful times when you don't have anything to do and you're not being oppressed or you're not in the situation that's triggering your anger sadness or whatever it is no it's those it's the situations that are tree triggering the the unhappy emotions those are the that's the dojo that's the training cathedral right where the universe is like giving you this this training and this all you know my understanding of it is that all you have to do is make a simple shift from being in the misery to watching yourself be in the misery be attentive to the emotions rising to the surface as you go through your day you don't have to change anything and watch the way you act just watch

it's really fucking fun sit on the bleachers and watch the lumbering golem that you've become trampled through the cities of your life again and again and again yes yes right watch it watch it get angry watch it get greedy watch it punish watch it get revenge watch it just watch you don't even have to change yet somehow from just this watching the thing will begin to change on its own yeah it'll just start shifting naturally away from anger away from punishing and that's where she gets interesting man absolutely I mean mindfulness in that sense is like working out it's not rocket science is not that complicated as you say it's a matter of the first step is you just watch how you react what's how external stimuli hit you and how you respond you know and you don't

do anything else it's not all it is is dumb discipline right you just have to stay with it yeah throughout the day isn't you don't have to be brilliant you don't have to be a genius you just have to have stamina and you won't stay with it you won't stay with it and that's the other fun part is you'll fall out of it sure you'll go into what it's no different than an alcoholic blackout because you'll be in this mindful place and then two days later you'll come to back to mindfulness again and guaranteed in those two days you'll look back and think oh god some smoldering fucking mess will be left behind when you fell back into a pure habituation with that with with no awareness you know it happens to me a lot lately or in this sense my daughter is four years old now

and that happens a lot with her where she'll do something and she's actually a really good girl she's really really nice but she's you know a four-year-old girl that means you know willful and oh shit I spilled the milk and you know all little things that are difficult throughout the day and every time you know when 30 of those things I've added up together suddenly I see that one more thing that touches me and I'm just like and the next second you know when you see your face got all sad and you're like wait did I just yell at a four-year-old girl because she spilled her milk what the fuck is wrong with me you know and instantly you switch you go to this other place you're like oh I can't believe I was that person yeah two seconds ago yeah you know and then

you watch that and now you've got the cycle right because if you watch so you see you watch the like anger come out you watch the trigger and no matter what you do you know when you start working on this shit you will get really puffed up and you'll start thinking like I'm the Dalai Lama I'm totally I guess that'll be the last time I get angry in this incarnation and then like you know within seconds would hours a day who knows someone will say just the right wrong thing to you oh yeah and bam you're back in fucking defensive posturing puffed up martyrdom whatever the fucking thing is where you feel like you have the right right to viciously brutally attack somebody and you're justified in doing it for sure you're always justified first they fucked up really this time

this is what you're gonna do to me always like that always and you're always in the right and then after you fucking done the thumbs down to the gladiator in the arena and they've decapitated him and you get to watch the blood gush out of his neck you the anger fades away and all that's left is you are a fucking shitty emperor staring down at a decapitated hero and you've done nothing except continue this endless cycle of violence that exists in the universe which is the creates that thing we were talking about earlier which you're just a pixel in an image of horror right so it's like it's really fucking cool to uh to watch watch the guilt part of the cycle to because that is no that is no that's just the other side of the coin sure of the anger yeah the guilt and

the anger are all different representations of an internal structure that already exists inside of you and by watching that internal structure by giving it attention once that that begins to shift you know the guilt moment even though I hate the word guilt and I think that guiltiness is like a stupid emotion to indulge in for too long there's an element of it that's actually good because there's something about the moment where you feel like he's not about beating yourself up for the way you have been the previous minutes or days or whatever is about feeling I don't want to be away anymore right you know having that moment where he may help you remember the next time when you're about to blow and you're like oh I remember this pattern and I was not particularly thrilled

with the person I was once I went down this route so how about I don't you know yes and you just take a deep breath and you're like okay I can actually handle this I can do this and it feels fucking good you feel like there's something about the way you're responding that you find healthier gives you more satisfaction it doesn't traumatize people around you and there you know things are flowing it's again that's to me that's an art that's the ultimate art yeah man it is the ultimate art I think it is the ultimate art because if you can succeed in this endeavor by you know habitually achieving mindfulness when the anger comes then you you'll start getting triggered less because the it's like I you adopt a dog go adopt a shitty dog go adopt a dog that's been in a

rescue right he's been kicked abandoned malnourished bring the dog to your house and you will see that you have a scared creature that if you get too close to it at the wrong time it might grow it might even bite you and but if you give that creature love and structure but love man two months down the road you are now living with something out of a Disney cartoon right just this sweet beautiful creature that looks at you as though you are Zeus or something right so what you've done there is you've put your attention on you've given a being loving attention and the effect of loving attention is that it transforms things that are out of balance to things that are in balance or things that are out of harmony into things now when you realize that you've got a

rescue dog living inside of you that's been beaten and malnourished sure me I don't care maybe you're some middle-class upper-class kid who had all the fucking pasta and bologna and everything you wanted slung at your ass guaranteed in some other way yeah you are malnourished who knows how everyone so we've all got this little fucking rescue dog you start applying mindfulness to that freaked out little fucked up mutt and the same thing happens inside of you that happened outside of you with that dog right now this thing inside of you that used to be the cancerous monster of your life bulldozing through relationships like Palestinian villages suddenly that fucking thing can be turns into this this super powerful sweetness that the right and then the next thing

you know is that thing starts shining out of you on the other people yeah and then the people around you are like wait yeah make a big difference the way you really do you can have that's the place where individual power comes in where you can make a difference in your environment in the people you interact with on a day-to-day basis and it people feel it people sometimes respond to it sometimes stay with them or give them an idea of something to work on it's awesome it's as good as it gets now the part that to me is one thing that's a trap is when people go that path of mindfulness which is a great first step yeah and they learn the oh I shouldn't react I should be taking it in the best possible way and that's not mindfulness anymore because what they are doing is they are

applying a dog matter no matter what they feel you know when you see especially with a lot of passive aggressive people that they will know better than to blow up but you know that behind that facade they're always smile always respond with oh yeah it's very interesting that you feel the way there's something there that's just like so what I dig is people who can have strong emotions that rock them not this passive weird stuff but you have that feeling and sometimes you're like I'm just gonna punch through this wall right now and at that moment they have the mindfulness to choose which 99% of the time if you have the mindfulness you're gonna choose not to blow up and go crazy and the weird stuff and you're just gonna go and then there will be the one

time where like okay I'm not gonna hurt myself I'm not hurting anybody else fuck just remember what it's like let's go down that path you know you choose to do the wrong thing fuck yeah kind of like you choose to let the cab driver driver do his thing you know there's a choice there where you are not just the victim of circumstances but you're deciding which path you want to go that that's why you need good friends no because you want to be around friends who are gonna let you go into a seizure of anger and be a fucking asshole for a little while and at the other end of it you want to be around friends who are like oh welcome back yeah you freak the fuck out huh yeah yeah no problem I forgive you right and now it's like okay cool great I can freak out around

you thank you yeah I can freak out around you and because you want you Pete you're gonna freak the fuck out and you're exactly right man the whole other side where it's like now you're just like some bullshit smiling something you're like a walking Yellowstone National Park you're you're like this beautiful thing that underneath it is the potential energy to cause the next fucking apocalypse from that pool of magma under Yellowstone yeah no you don't want that no you want to be able to vent yep you got to deal with that fucking magma bed underneath you not by ignoring it but also not by like letting it all come out in one catastrophic explosion you want to do simultaneously cool that thing and when the thing does blast make sure the blasts aren't so tremendous that

you're at a shopping mall coming to yourself and you realize you just gunned down five strangers yeah that's the far end of the scale that's a bad day yes or another version you know I just saw this video that to me really sums up the importance of mindfulness and not being overcome by your anger have you seen the video of the guy working late and the woman's vacuuming no oh my god man this guy's working at a desk he's like clearly stressed out he's working late who knows what he's what's happened he's in an office the maid is vacuuming the maintenance lady's vacuuming he grabs a pair of scissors and cuts the cord of the vacuum cleaner with the scissors and electrocutes himself so he's like trying to cut the cord of the vacuum cleaner because he's lost control

lights dim in the building he you see his body convulsed because he's being electrocuted and then you know he's probably dead right so it's easy yeah so you see like okay well like you know generally when we lose our cool you end up with like an unhappy three-year-old right or you end up with a girlfriend who is like sad for a day right but sometimes you lose control and you die that's why road rage is scary because that's where the odds are that things can get really out of control are it's like doesn't fucking matter who cuts you off doesn't matter anything the more you give into the rage the more likely you are the one who end up the victim of the whole thing and it's like you're not punishing anybody by getting angry you're punishing yourself by letting somebody

else get you and you always end up the victim of a thing no question if you if anger gets triggered inside of you it doesn't let's say anger gets triggered inside of you because somebody walks up to you on the street and throws water in your child's face right okay now this is a situation needs to be dealt with sure you know you're not just gonna sit and smile at the guy in some sweet Sunbeam way yeah and tell him oh you know everything is for the best you just mind your son you just need to look at it in a different direction it's like fuck you already so but if their anger explodes inside of you and the fury and the rage the poison comes back it's really doesn't come back it's always there right but when they when the clouds part and reveal

them the eye of soar on inside of you again and the thing possesses you now you've got now there's a double problem right now not only has your daughter been had water thrown in her face by some weirdo I don't know this person is a story but now you're possessed by Satan now you're possessed by the id right so now you've got two problems and then the third problem comes when you start slamming the person's head into the concrete right in front of your daughter right because now your daughter is witnessing the way that you're supposed to act when shit goes ultimately wrong right so now you're teaching your daughter violence is the answer right and now here's a fourth thing after the guy has his seizure from the massive head injury that you've

given him you lose your daughter to the state because you're going to jail or who knows what right so you see the moment anger steps into the picture everything goes haywire you lose automatically but if you keep that that's why I think martial arts are cool is because they teach you to keep your cool and then make your decision from that right POV yeah yeah and that decision that you make is always going to be better than the decision you make when you're fucked up because it's not a decision you know you're just responding and it's not a decision otherwise there really is something about being in a place where you get to choose how you respond yes that's a decision if you just somebody touch you one way and you immediately respond another

way there's no choice there it's automatic pilot and but that's why sometime I dig the guys like when you were mentioning earlier some of sort of the big figures of inspirational clearly some of those are amazing no doubt about it but there's something I dig about the figures you know compare and Martin Luther King was clearly you know awesome in a lot of ways no doubt about that and yet there's that you know I'm gonna go to hookers all the time but I have to hide it because my public image is there's that versus you know the the guys the people who are have that amazing mindfulness but at the same time they are not goody-goody and they are going to enjoy life in ways that they never get to hurt anybody but they are definitely questionable in terms of morality or some people

would feel like you know you are so spiritual you're not supposed to fucking be wasted on sake right now what's wrong with you and it's like that ability to mix both to mix you know a good don a stupid human dirty aspect to yourself without letting them run you over and having a mindfulness about it that to me is where it's interesting because otherwise I feel like one is turning into a stereotype you know I'm gonna be the saint with white clothes who say always the wise deep thing it's like you're a fortune cookie you're not somebody who's enlightened you're becoming something else it's you are this living stereotype of what enlightenment is like yeah right and then you look at the foundation of all these great religions you find debt in the chain

of disciplic succession there is always a guy covered in mud beating people right who is the like the the progenitor of the thing it's never the it's never like someone in white robes it's always some someone who's like gone absolutely bad shit crazy is mad or seems bad but isn't mad right because what is going on with it if you look at the earth if you look at like the get universe the universe had the universe is bad shit crazy it's not some white robe thing it's exploding stars that are turning into pigs yeah it's like this is things lost his mind what's it doing it's like blowing people out of planets right it's like creating black holes that are sucking matter and we don't even know where and it's apparently infinite and it's waking me up to

tell me to have a podcast with your it will implode yeah what a drama queen you know we have yeah and to think that something that's going to really be close to that and is it representing that it's going to be all smiles and sweetness and love or even consistent right is lunacy yeah yeah fuck no that thing's gonna get hookers from time to time and that thing's gonna do whatever it wants to do proudly right proudly or not proudly or ashamed you know this is the this chogyeom trumpet book talks about the history of the school of Tibetan Buddhism that he practices which I could remember the name I can't but it's like people would leave Tibet to try to gather information about Buddhism and this the story is I can't remember the guy who brought

this specific form of Buddhism back to Tibet sorry people who know but he basically was searching to try to find a true teacher of Buddha someone who really understood it and he's caught wind that there was a guy who was like a saint who had achieved realization and he went into this village where they said he was and he was asking people the person's name I wish I could remember the guy's name maybe it was T. Lope T. Loper you know about this right T. Loper yeah and they're like I don't know about any saint but there's a guy who like is down who like eats discarded fish yeah by the river you know talk to that guy right and that guy's just this like filthy homeless person he's like a pig the op in this guy's journey so far right to find that freak and it

didn't you know the story then remind me later because I read some T. Loper stuff but remind me the story is that he ends up maybe the guy who went to visit him his name's Marpa perhaps I'm not sure but the T. Loper ends up you know he wants this guy to I don't think he even talks to the guy he says fine just follow me around but it's like he has the guy go bring him some soup he has him go steal soup okay from a wedding right and he's telling him to go steal a guy steal soup brings it back to him gives him the soup and he said that's the first time you saw T. Loper smile and the whole time you've been with him he's like this is good soup would you go give me some more and so he goes to get him more soup and then they catch the guy and beat the shit out

of him apparently they break his legs and leave him laying in the mud and then like a few days later T. Loper finds him he's like where have you been where's my soup and he's like playing there broken and sick and it's just a series of like painful painful moments that ultimately lead to T. Loper slapping him with his across the face with his sandal and he gets the transmission from that somehow from this like right act of violence he learns he's in T. Loper says that's all I can teach you right that's what that's like one of the progenitors of Tibetan Buddhism the height of my teaching is the slappy with my sandal see later that's a that's a tantric school isn't it yes yes it is but yeah you're right man because the you know the well again

it's like once you want it helps the lesson I get from that is I have to stop closing myself off to thinking that I'm only getting taught when I'm around people like you know Ram Das or when I around when I'm around people like you know who are very far along and if clearly like discipline I have to stop thinking that and realize that I'm the if T. Lowe if one of the founders of this school of Buddhism was a muddy guy was like violent and disgusting you you probably you could pass that guy a hundred times on the street right and never know never fucking know that you are passing a saint so that's the idea is to open yourself up to the possibility that is the vehicle that is going to teach you is not gonna look the way you think it's gonna look right because I mean

ultimately nobody teach you jack shit life teaches you and or rather life is life doesn't teach or wants to teach or doesn't give a fuck life is life and you interacting with life learn from life as far as teaching you it's it's it's up to you it's like you know with every book that's like one thing that happens anytime I wrote something is when people like it regularly it's the fuck these are exactly my thoughts expressed in a different way that clicks and jive in a way that so it's not that you are making up something that nobody has ever thought of is just that you in that moment find a way that other people respond to and that's what you know is like to me that's why when we put too much the figure of the teacher on a pedestal I feel like look they had their own

shit they still have their own shit and as long as they are honest with it that you can learn a lot from them you can get a lot out of them but this all you know you are a saint above the clouds or never it's like do we stop being I can't even learn from you at that point because it's not real it's not like I haven't seen you you know drop the hot sauce on your foot and go god damn it yeah then I know you're real right otherwise you know if you drop the hot sauce on your foot and you go like huh the me out there is experiencing pain right now but I shouldn't react badly right as I come on man it's like it is stopped for the way I'm made you know maybe somebody else can learn from that I don't I need to have the gritty mad the aspect of it along with the beautiful and light

and one I can't have it separated yeah cuz you so yeah cuz then you're just like what game are you running on me mother fucker basically yeah like I yeah there's no way I can remember once being in a taking this class in religions when I was in college and we went to all these different churches and synagogues we went to a mosque and we're sitting in the mosque and the guy was like teaching at the mosque there a baby starts crying and screaming right screaming at the top of his lungs crying and screaming and the guy was like teaching us about the mosque he like stops and he's like isn't that a isn't that a beautiful sound and that that moment I stopped listening to it's like no mother fucker that's a fucking screaming loud annoying obnoxious thing

yeah I don't believe that you think that that's a beautiful sound right I can believe that you could say that's that's annoying but we can learn patience from it yeah of course when you're trying to tell me that a screaming baby is a beautiful sound if that was true there'd be no humans on this planet cuz nobody be feeding babies record players until they start the death don't feed the baby it won't make that beautiful sound anymore no I know I know exactly what you mean that's tough driving nuts when people play these holler than that kind of approach is just like come on man mainly driving nuts cuz it's not real and is another ego act a bigger ego act than the ones that look like ego acts because one is being honest about it and the other one is

just trying to mask it in this that's why to me the biggest one of the healthiest spiritual steps is embracing being human is being genuine first and foremost which doesn't mean being a robotic asshole who respond to everything because that's I don't even consider that genuine either you're that's not being sincere that's having no personality and no choice to me having been genuine is having the mindfulness that allow you to make choices but for the most part choosing to go down a healthy path and when you decide not to go down that path is because you do so in an environment that nobody's gonna hurt right just doing it just to keep the energy moving yes that to me is genuine you know you're embracing all of yourself without squashing some side is like

well that doesn't fit my saintly image so I'm just gonna soberly disregard that part right fuck that you know if it's there it's there play with it laugh at it maybe say come on I don't really want to go there a lot of the time yeah but you know embracing it and acknowledging it I think is it keeps you for a real human being versus a stator type of a human being acknowledging it that's all you gotta do embrace it good fucking luck but acknowledge it start there maybe you'll begin to embrace it later down the line you know but at least just acknowledge that's all acknowledge the seizure and acknowledge the fact that in the same way if you put a strobe light in front of an epileptic it's gonna fall down it like it's not human what am I

fucking Joseph Mengele or something he when you put a strobe light in front of an epileptic he's gonna fall down and have a seizure in the same way acknowledge that you're an epileptic when it comes to anger right and only instead of strobe lights triggering the seizure of reactivity it's assholes in traffic selfish lovers crappy bosses whatever the fucking thing is shitty politicians bad weather disease whatever the thing is just acknowledge that the strobe light is not the evil or isn't is when it comes to epilepsy it's not the strobe light it's something inside the epileptics brain causing this reaction the idea being that in the epileptic if there was some way to transform the epileptics brain so that that part was not no longer affected

by strobe lights then strobe lights would become inconsequential to the epileptic so in the same way if you could change that internal part of yourself so that it no longer it causes you to have a seizure whenever anyone cuts you off in traffic or doesn't call you back or calls you much or whatever then you have cured yourself in a true way and that's something that no fucking car no TV no house no material thing nothing outside of yourself can do right absolutely that's why in a sense I wouldn't go as far as thanking all the assholes in your life but in a way they are still assholes and that's why you're not gonna thank them but in a way they are helping you because he's giving you opportunity over and over again to learn the game of how not to give in to anger

or not to react to every little thing at least having a choice before you punch them at least you choose to punch them as opposed to reacting yes you know that's each one is an opportunity to learn that's why one game I always played as a kid I would always imagine whatever insecurity I had going down the list of all the possible ones I would imagine people either some that I would know some that I wouldn't know how they would just go poke at that aspect of me and verbally you know kind of like when somebody's picking on you and they just they don't pick on you on you know somebody tells you you are and they tell something that is totally patently not true doesn't even bug you that much because like what the fuck are you talking about that just doesn't touch me but

if they start picking on you on something that's true where it is true that you're lacking in that department yeah even if you play that game in your head you see your body start twitching and yes getting all tense and getting ready to say no because you're not like slow down there's nobody really on there is all in your mind it's nothing else why are you responding in a way that just being a scared the fence you know you're putting up the fences because you're freaked out because it's real yes it is real why don't you learn from it and how can you respond to it in a healthier fashion how can you you know isn't there a thing called a bot fly that lays shit in your head and it'll poke out of the hole sometimes I'm missing out on that I can't remember what it

is there's some kind of parasite that it's a really terrible parasite right and it lays eggs inside of you and so in the eggs grow into these like worms and the worms to get them out of your head they've got to poke out of they got to poke their heads out a little bit and then when they poke their heads out I think I'm not positive about this there might be another way you get them up I think you can grab them and you can yank them out well right so in the same way that's what anger is and so if you look at it like this is a parasitic energy living inside of me and when and that sometimes isn't ever it's not even there like if you look at yourself you can see like oh I'm just pretty blank right now or I feel happy I don't feel it but when the thing triggers it

it's like if you had a parasite in your head and you were using a little bit of stake to lure the parasite out to poke its head out so you can pull it out it would be like screaming at the stake when the parasite appears like you steak you're the reason this parasites in my head right it's like no forget the fucking steak deal with the parasite and then when you deal with the parasite then it's like then then you're free absolutely that's freedom yeah yeah that's freedom and and it's and you know and again I think that you know that I love that Eastern versions of this shit because they they don't they say and it's gonna take you 16 million lifetime right but the beauty of it is that each step along the way feels a little better so yes you know you may if you focus on when do

I gonna get to that place is a fuck you know but the fact is each time you do that it feels a little better it becomes a little easier it becomes so you got the rewards along the way it's not just the big payoff at the end of it all which makes the whole process more pleasant yeah man and it's so yeah it really is it's so cool it makes you feel like you're leveling up in a dumb video game every just the realization that you don't have to react to your anger yeah just that alone can change your life and the most insane way ever if you've been spinning this is why not only should you think think or whatever be grateful for the assholes in your life but you should also be grateful perhaps that you are an asshole because the reason that you should be grateful that

you're an asshole is it means that laying ahead of you is a paradise unlike anything that you've even thought you could have that's why it's kind of cool to be sad that's why you know when you're sick and you've been sick for a while and then the sickness goes away seven yeah yeah oh my god this feels great yep and then maybe every subsequent what who knows maybe every you know every let's level along the way it's just like this like another shit of the Russian egg thing what is that called the Russian the matryoshka yeah every little thing that falls away it's just gets you deeper and deeper into this coil of paradise of course until when the whole thing falls away and then you realize oh I am paradise I'm not a thing experience it I'm it experiencing

matter or something that's what they say I don't understand it I'm just parroting at this point mimicking like a little fucking toddler alert but good to have something to look forward to yes oh man this is a good one thank you so much thank you universe thank you universe and you have a podcast called the drunken Taoist yep and where is that so drunken Taoist the drunken Taoist.com you find but last you can find it on iTunes teacher all the regular ways you guys can get podcast and what else Twitter I always announce the episode at the Bolely D as my first initial Daniel and then my last name B-O-L-E-L-L-I those are the easiest what about your books books yes please buy them I have three there's on the warrior's path which is

about philosophy and martial arts 50 things you're not supposed to religion which was kind of a just 50 things is a funny book is like is just that one is less vision and more fun you know it's not there's you know on the warrior's path or my last one create your own religion that's like my heart and soul I put in there 50 things is a fun game that's way more going on the comedy route than it is on the disease the deepest part of me kind of stuff but yeah 50 things and create your own religion are as the title may suggest about religion go to drunkentrausel.com I'll have links to all of those books as well as Daniel's podcast and of course his Twitter which is at the Bolely two L's yeah first one L second time too well got it okay God bless you thank you sir

thank you thanks for listening everybody and if you get a chance give a shout out to Chris Ryan on Twitter for giving us the nice soundboard that makes the podcast sound so much better than it currently does at the second as I record it into my crappy computer mic and also if you like the podcast give us a nice rating on iTunes be sweet to each other I love you thank you for listening you're gonna love this house sergeant Riley just look at these high ceilings the upstairs is even better you can read the Constitution from your window upstairs I don't see any stairs just strap on this harness and climb right up up this rock climbing wall there's no field manual for finding the right home but when you do USA homeowner's insurance can help protect it the right way

like saving up to 15% with our claims free discount if you haven't filed the claim in five years even if you've been with another provider learn more today at usaa.com slash ensure my home discounts vary by location it may not be available in all states restrictions apply membership eligibility and product restrictions apply and are subject to change USA means United Services Automobile Association and its affiliate San Antonio, Texas