Dungeons and Daddies - S3 Ep. 29 - The Moth Who Goo Too Much

Episode Date: July 15, 2025

Get in the goo tube, Shinji.This episode contains Violence, Profanity, Sexual Content.We're All Gonna Die, starring Ashly Burch and Jordan Rodrigues, available for digital download!https://wereallgonnadiemovie.com/Info and tickets for Beth's solo show "Beth Wants the D":Edinburgh Fringe: www.pleasance.co.uk/event/beth-wants-dSupport the show on Patreon!Get merch and more at our website!Follow us on Bluesky @dungeonsanddads!Check out the subreddit!DM is Will Campos Kelsey Grammar is Matt Arnold Francis Farnsworth is Anthony BurchTrudy Trout is Beth May Blake Lively is Freddie Wong Theme song is “A Hole in the Stars” by Maxton WallerAnnissa Omran is our Content ProducerAshley Nicollette is our Community ManagerKortney Terry is our Community CoordinatorCindy Denton is our Merch ManagerEster Ellis is our Lead EditorTravis Reaves, Omar Romolino, and Brian Fernandes provide Additional EditingCover art and episode art by Alex Moore (@notanotheralex)Get in contact: https://www.dungeonsanddaddies.com/contactThe story, all names, characters, and incidents portrayed in this production are fictitious. No identification with actual persons (living or deceased), places, buildings, and products is intended or should be inferred. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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The movie, Matt and I wrote and directed, is now available on digital download platforms. A struggling beekeeper, played by Ashley Burch, teams up with an emotionally raw EMT, played by Jordan Rodriguez, on a road trip to retrieve her bees and his car after their stuff is suddenly teleported across the country by a giant alien artifact. It's a sci-fi road trip comedy that premiered last year at South by Southwest and features music by Daddy's composer Maxton Waller. Oh, and Beth is in it too. You can find links at we'reallgonnadiemovie.com.

We're all gonna, G-O-N-N-A, die movie dot com. More like we're all gonna buy the movie that is. Ha, am I right? Okay, that's enough. Please check it out. Dungeons and Daddies is a rowdy, horny, violent podcast for grownups. Content warnings can be found in the episode description. Good evening.

Our guest author tonight has written five New York Times bestsellers with her sci-fi series Nebula's Ashes and is now branching out to historical romance with her new book Boil and Trouble. Here to read an excerpt, please give a warm welcome to author Tim Lee Persons. Thank you so much. So happy to be here. This is from the chapter three, Snaking the Drain. A husky grunt fled Blake's soft pursed lips as he strained to tighten his enormous wrench. These pipes had seen better days indeed, nestled beneath Baba Yaga's crooked hut and hissing like an enraged serpent. I did not anticipate this hut having plumbing, said Blake, as a bead of sweat trickled down his neck

and onto his toned and glistening trapezius muscles, swirling into a milky mixture of fluids with the drip of Baba Yaga's leaking pipe. Fie, fie, chuckled a voice from the corner. And are you here of your own free will or by compulsion, my good youth? Blake turned to face the sound of her voice, that beautiful voice, like the toady croak of an untuned piano. He saw her just barely as she presented her body from the darkness. His throat tightened as he fought an instant and inescapable erection.

She was built like a spider with flesh, swollen knees bobbing out at impossible angles as she clambered toward him with a pot of human stew in her branch-like arms. Yes, he stammered. I'm here of my own free will. Good squealed Baba Yaga because I value ye consent above all else. With one practiced hand Baba Yaga reached for Blake's belt buckle. With the other she held out the stew made of human children for Blake to taste. He quivered, lapping it up like a kitty drinking milk even though most cats are lactose intolerant. But it wasn't enough.

He wanted, no, needed to taste her. Their lips met, softly at first, then with fervent aggression, gnashing their teeth together to taste every boil and shin hair and drop of human stew on each other's tongues. All of these pipes were about to get cleared out tonight. I am a plumber. Now show me the leak, Blake whispered, as Baba Yaga undressed to only her granny panties. The ecstasy was agony as his rock hard cock twitched like a metronome with his heartbeat as she readied her dripping wet.

Okay, okay, okay. That's all the time we have for that portion of our author series. We're gonna open it up now for Q and A. Yes, you sir with the hand raised. Hi, more of a comment than a question really. I'm gonna come. Hey.

Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey.

Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. Welcome to Dungeons and Daddies, not a BDSM podcast. It's a Hey There Delilah podcast. That's just a little silly joke we were making before we started recording. But go ahead, buddy. It's just you making it. You made a film. I think we are all enjoying it, just because I was the brainchild

behind the beautiful invention of the parody songs. I was trying to play along. I was like the confused dad at the brainchild's tea party. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, hey there, Delilah, right? Yeah. That's what it is. This is the Peachyville Horror, a Call of Cthulhu actual play,

horror comedy podcast. About four everyday schmoes fighting the forces of darkness in suburban 1950s. In suburban New York City. In suburban 1950s America. And around the world. That's right, this podcast has gone global. I play deep thinking plumber Blake Lively. A.K.A. Mr. Worldwide.

Mr. Worldwide. Dalai. What? That's the thing he says. What does he say? Dalai. Dalai. That's the thing he says. That's the thing he says. Mr. Worldwide. Yeah, Mr. Worldwide. Dallae. What? That's a thing he says. What does he say? Dallae. Dallae. That's a thing he says.

That's a thing he says. Mr. Worldwide. Yeah, Mr. Worldwide. Pitbull. Yeah. What does he say? Dallae. That's a thing he says.

That's a thing he says. What are you fucking stupid? That's a thing he says. I play Deep Thinking Plover Blake Lively. A little Blake fact for this week. Good on you, Freddie, for bringing it, bringing it, bringing it back to the podcast. Nice.

Well, you may have noticed an adeptness about Blake last time as he skillfully navigated the halls of the base. That's because that's not the first time Blake Lively has infiltrated an enemy base. He does wear on a base. Climb through the air vents and fix the air conditioning because the allies occupied the base and they're like, hey, the air air conditioning is broken Can you go fix it? He's like I will fix it and he did and he was a hero and he got extra cake that night He's a very very is that how the army works you get cake in the army, right? I don't know

Yeah, you ask me Somebody's had cake in the army before everybody they are buttered up in the army Are you a veteran? Please let us know if you got cake. If you got cake. Do they bake a cake for you? The boys of the 101st Airborne! They dropped in and they had to make sure! Why is the Southern General from the Confederacy? Fucking Colonel Foghorn Leghorn over here!

They had to make sure that their parachute were extra big! Cause we were dropping cake into Normandy like a bakery delivery service. I have a little joke too. You're saying that Blake knows his way around a base and a shaft? What about the head? We'll see. Stay tuned. You know most of the air conditioning is located in the tip of the H-Bed. Hey everybody. I don't have a joke. I just want to introduce my characters okay okay everybody we all get 30 seconds of fun and the next person gets to go okay so you get time B I could get the Mars in that time that's

funny That was pretty good. But these just crossed the boundary. Yeah, I got it. This was my time? It wasn't your time for jokes. Reclaiming my time. Hey, everybody. My name's Matthew Arnold.

We do need to dox three seconds from Anthony's time for interrupting your time. OK, fair enough. You're going to dox me? Dock. Oh. Brand-dog. Hey, everybody.

My name's Matthew Arnold, and I play Kelsey Grammer, Peechieville's happiest and snappiest school mom. I know what she always says. What? You can't spell education without having had one. That's really good. That's funny, that's funny. That's good. I'm proud of that one, thank you.

So quick little fact about Kelsey. There's many reasons why she has not gone very far in her encyclopedia, you know, from the plagiarism scandal to being stuck on things to starting over. But one reason that she hasn't gone past B yet is because when she got to B, besides right after writing about boxing, she had to write about brothers,

and she's just, aw. Still writing about her brother. So everything post-BR, Will, you can say that Matt doesn't know. I also like that you jumped from L-M-N-O, and you just skipped Q. Although I guess B-Q doesn't give you any. It wasn't immediately after boxing.

Like there's some other stuff between boxing and brothers, but what? Name one, quickly. Bot wasn't immediately after boxing. There was some other stuff between boxing and brothers, but what? Name one, quickly. Botox. Nope. Nope. Brothels. Brain.

Brick of Brack. Brothel. That's actually under brothers because he was in the war. Why do you went to a few? What? Brothel. When you go brothels it says see brothers, location's brother has been brothel. I love that indie game Brels a tale of two souls

This is a that's just a sex game. This is not gonna be a useful encyclopedia. It sounds like I mean for her Just for myself it's more of an encyclopedia Your way you know what Anthony's encyclopedia is called what in cell clope Edea It's more of an insight... L-I-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N Francis fact for today is that Francis is former bully, what we call him small Shane Silva. I guess he's live. He's the only Shane Silva. Living Shane. Living Shane. Hanging out with friends. He owns a car. As a teenager, he owns a car.

Yeah. His dad's making that good, good police money. He's got a pension. And Francis used to have to run from it and avoid it and stuff like that. So Francis came up with some good things to carry around all the time in case there is a bully around chasing you in a car. Such as... Ooh, this is good. I'm gonna write these down. Knee pads, elbow pads, some sort of helmet, goggles, because sometimes the bad guy, the bully will like throw a poop filled bag that's on fire and the gas, you might inhale the gas and it might make you tear up. So make sure you bring traffic cones so you can put it on the bag and then pour water on that also a leaf leaf blower to blow the stuff away and Only bring your ID. Don't bring your smartphone. That's what I learned Francis learns to keep all his devices

Yeah, his devices at home his rotary phone is at home. He does not unplug his rotary I was about to be like you, this episode is dropping in a month. And I'm like, do I think the world's going to be better? What do I think is going to happen? This is all good advice. Wear a helmet out there. Also, don't your phone just being off doesn't work. No, you can still try it.

Take the SIM card out or leave it at home. Oh, I didn't know. I just figured like if there's something bad that happens and you need somebody to pick you up, you might need like... That's what your burner phone's for. That's what your burner's for, yeah. Oh, sick. Go to a Target, use only cash get a

Burner and a prepaid card and use it later After they've don't use it before you buy it. No, I'm saying You need to if you're thinking there's moves you make so that there's enough time that security camera footage gets deleted. Mmm That's smart and then Anthony why bring ID? Because if the cops arrest you... Francis. If the cops arrest Francis... Sorry. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry, if the bullies kidnap Francis,

it's easier for them to process and therefore allow you to get, allow Francis to get bail than if you have no identification, in which case they push you basically to the bottom of the queue and you have to wait. What if you only have knives and lint, like the Joker in The Dark Knight?

And make sure you planted a rotary phone bomb in your good friend. They accept gamer ID Yeah, if you show them your steam achievements if you have enough Protests without his switch to on him you got another thing Best time excuse me. How long have I been in this country? Check out the number of treatments. I got that's, tears of war one? When were you born, sir? I haven't heard her since then. Hi, my name is Beth May and I play Trudy Trout, a homemaker, mother, robot.

Fun fact about Trudy Trout is that we've all established that Trudy has nerves of steel, but she does not have a heart of gold because gold is used primarily in the CPU for memory because of its capacity to something conductivity conductivity yes I haven't been very happy with Trudy's conductivity as a place oh Oh wow that was good You could use that one. Yeah, if you're trying to get out no. I wasn't trying to get out I was just trying to go just educating us. Yeah, okay gold is a notoriously soft metal

But Trudy's heart is made of something even softer Do I know what that is no, but it is softer than gold so there you go And I yield the remainder of my time, and I'm setting a boundary I'm not trying to explain anything else Hot chi machi Hello hello, how are you all today? I'm ready to play game all right? I'm Will Campos I'm your daddy master guy. I'm the keeper, I'm the beholder, the holder, the wielder of the secrets and the mysteries.

And I have a creepy fact for you today. I'm excited. Which is that. Well, you got new sandals on. Where are those? That is good. But I'm wearing Tivas and not Birkenstocks. You've had the Tivas for a while.

He made the transition. They highlight the best parts of your feet so nicely. My little piggies are out today. God. Oink, oink. What's the top part of the foot called? They gotta have aiggies are out today. God. Oink oink. What's the top part of the foot called? They gotta have a name for that. The top part of the foot?

The top of the foot? Everybody's got, yeah, but they gotta have a better name than that. That's true. You can't say that in bed. The bottom is the sole. The laces? The laces?

Were you talking about the, what do you mean, the front? Like the little? No, like above the piggies. The top part. The front? That big, flat, fleshy part there, Will. It seems wrong to call it the front of the foot. I don't know.

Ah, it's the dorsum. The dorsum? The dorsum. Your dorsal fin. The dorsum. Ah, it's the dorsum. The dorsum? The dorsum. Your dorsal fin. My dorsum. Give me some of that dorsum. Showing a little dorsum today, Will. Some tasteful dorsum. I don't think I can do a fact creepier than Matt saying that to me,

but I'll try. Subscribe to my OnlyFans for exclusive dorsum pics. It's like, well, the kid is like, your epidermis is showing or whatever. My creepy fact for today is that the last sense to go when you die is your hearing. How did they know that? They asked a guy, I don't know. He's a dead guy.

I read it somewhere and I only bring it up because a lot of people listen to the show when they're driving. At least one person said they listen to it while they're using a forklift. And I just want you to know, hey. Operating heavy machinery. If you're listening to this podcast

while doing something dangerous, choose wisely, because our voices may be the last thing you hear before the lights go out. Or an ad. Yeah. Or it could be an ad. This way you should subscribe to our Patreon. You really want to hear one of our fucking ads when you die?

Oh, man. Hear that silence? That's what it's going to be like when you die? Aw man. Hear that silence? That's what it's gonna be like when you die. That's gonna be the last thing you're gonna hear is my voice. We recorded the sound of what it sounds like after you die. POV when I die. It's that feeling when you die.

It was able to produce a single sound. Ah! Ah! Hey there, I died. Would you like to play some games with me? Yes. Yes! All right, let's play some CoC When we last left the crew the squad you guys had narrowly escaped

Building 21 the secret Soviet black site in the middle of Percy Kovograd where all manner of spooky and fucked up Science was going on. And probably like a little bit of normal science. It's some normal science, you know, so they were still applying for grants and stuff, I'm sure. You rescued Mothman from the irradiated scrap heap blast zone that the Soviets used to commune with the powers that be, and you were able to successfully outwit Baba Yaga. Blake's ex? Blake's potential ex- outwit Baba Yaga. Blake's ex?

Blake's potential ex-lover, Baba Yaga. Oh, there's whole Torah dreams of story there. You and Mothman and that little moth that's been following you around have all clambered onto the ship. You almost didn't make it out, but then the heroic efforts of one Antonio Collette, the original that is,

managed to heroically rescue with the last man you were able to blast off and hurtle into the sky What a crazy coincidence that he was there Yeah, it was crazy right makes you wonder all well kind of crazy coincidence happened in your life every day that you don't even know No, I told you I have another friend named Freddie one right no Really no that would be crazy though one want to meet him and defeat him in single combat. That's right Freddie Wong is like a Combat all right all right all right all right so right. Ferdy Wong is like an islander. Single combat. Alright, alright, alright, alright, alright.

So anyway, uh, oh and then Leica died. No, we were in space. We went to space for a second. Well you went to like, I would say the upper atmosphere. So that Leica could see the stars. Wait, are we the first humans in space? No, we're in the late 50s. We might be. And you're in the upper atmosphere, I just said that. We're like Katy Perry space.

No, it's not even that far. I'm gonna kiss the ground and get back down. You're like, you see the stars. You, it's not even that You're like you see the stars you here's the outside will what happened we went from space our outsides anywhere We can see the stars Like I said, she wanted to see the stars like I saw the stars I do realize you know just a point of fact you guys realize that when you go outside you see the stars at night That doesn't mean you're in outer space right? No, I just don't know why you're hedging that we went to space But okay, why can't we go to space? It's for reasons that are important later. You're not okay. So we're kind of where space doesn't exist They're in like a stratosphere. Yeah, you're in the stratosphere pull up

Otherwise like I will have died for nothing pull up and bring us to space space man. Don't yell at Mothman He's been through a lot Mothman, can I yell at you? Please don't, I've been through a lot. See? Please, Lyca will die for nothing if we don't pull up more and go into actual- Unfortunately, the ship in its current state cannot go into space. Well, then what? Unless I activate this, and he points to this room, and there's a little window into it.

What is in this room? This is the sanctum sanctorum of my ship. The most powerful energies are kept there. Dr. Strange! And this is where the Darklight Drive is held. And you see like this cool, crazy, spinny drive. This is what allows my ship to sail between stars. But for safety reasons, I cannot activate it in the atmosphere.

A great cataclysm could occur. Oh, could you activate it in the atmosphere. A great cataclysm could occur. Oh, could you activate it in the thermosphere or the exosphere? Which fear? I have to be in outer space to use it. What about the ethinosphere? You guys need to back off! Moth Jesus has been through an awful lot! No, I agree.

I want to know how we get it. I want to help, but also where's Timmy? Where is Timmy? When I was ambushed, I moved your son to the safest place in the ship. The one place I knew no thing from this reality or any other could get to him in this room with the dark like crystal Well, is there a door handle and he like enters this sequence of like beep boops on this little panel and then this door slides Very science fiction. It's very technical. This is a hard sci-fi podcast this door slides open in the future You can't just open doors you gotta

Secure doors you have to yeah, it's just like come on. Can I look at what he's doing? Yes, to remember the code. I try to remember the code sure yeah, give me an intelligence role Oh, I was super past 14 all right. Here's what we're gonna. Do Matt. Oh super duper past That's exactly cuz I've 70 intelligence. I'm going to write down a series of numbers and then I'm gonna say them Okay, and if you can remember them by the end of the episode you can use them, but don't write them down Bad look at the screen don't write it back close your eyes close your eyes close your eyes. Okay close your eyes You're looking a little bit of your screen turn around

I'm looking at his eyes his eyes closed all right 109 to 350 981 oh well I saw what he did, but I already forgot Now this feels mean yeah, you see here in 9 to 3 0 to 981 no Do you really want to the code you can I know 210. Do you really want to know the code? I mean, yeah, just in case. I mean, yeah, all right. You guys, you are, you see, and you're able to understand this sort of, he has more like

little finger thingies than you do, so it's like, probably take two people to punch it in the way he does. But you see the code, if you wish to use the code. I mean, hopefully we don't need to. I wouldn't do it to like trick Mothman, but like, maybe if he's injured or something, we gotta get in there and he can't open it. But I got my eye on you. Okay.

I just know there's shenanigans around the corner, so Anymore We go in you go into the room. There's this big swirling crystal pulsing incomprehensible energy and you see Timmy He's got like again like a sort of IV drip thingy hooked up to him and he's on like a cot in the room as well And he is appears to still be comatose. Do you have the the stuff? I handed a little vial that's got the last little remaining bit of venom. You brought the venom with you. Yes late the dollmaker Yes, we did. Well done. And there's more back in America.

We did it to save Timmy. Mothman rushes over to like a receptacle to put the venom in and he holds it up and it's like about the size of like a huge Nalgene body. He's like, this much shall suffice, where is it? Oh no. That's a lot. How much did you bring?

I mean. Enough. Kelsey, I told you! We were assured it was enough! I told you that you shouldn't have used it on the bowling team! We shouldn't have used it! I'm sorry Trudy. I mean, not to nitpick, but that amount he's showing is more than we even brought.

It's a lot. But you're right, I shouldn't have used it because every big canister... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell. I just want him to be better. No, honey, you're fine. What if we mix it with water? Yeah, like, robotustin. Oh yeah. Is it constant? Can we dilute it?

What do you have? Show me. We have uncut, pure stuff. I show them. It's like, you know. It was like a rag that got chloroformed and then you run the rag out, right? There's some amount that you're like, we have like six... Little drippy drops. Back at Dr. Dog, she's got the corpse. Yeah, I don't know if we have as much as well

You didn't see it audience. Well motion like big It's like one of those really big Australian beers, that's what Big like an extra large foster sized can of beer. I think we have that much back in America. You present him this tiny little drop. We got like two or three ounces. And he holds up this little vial. He says, there may be something I can do with this. It will take time.

And he like leaves the room. Okay, cool. Drew, I'm sure we'll get to him. You hear beeping and booping in the other room. Do you want to see what I'm doing? Oh, sure. That'd be great. Yeah, you didn't invite us.

We'll come. Yeah, you just kind of walked out. It's not vampire rules in here. You guys can follow me around. How do you- never mind. Sorry, what? I guess they have vampires on the Moth Planet. You guys have vampires too?

Vampire Moths. Vampire Moths. Oh my goodness. They're going to suck your butt. They are very dangerous. Are the rules real? Very alluring. What are the vampire rules?

The vampire moth rules are as follows. They have to sleep in their own cocoon. One, they look at a different type of light than us Do you have a vampire movie called Let the Light One In? Wow! How do you know of this tale? Truly, truly you are wise beyond most humans. Oh stop it. This is a song we sing, Let the Light One In, that tells a tale of a sad moth and the flashlight Yes, a very sad moth and a very dangerous And that is all I can say for now

What are you doing to Timmy he puts the little vial in there's like the medical room with all the What are you doing to Timmy? He puts the little vial in, there's like the medical room with all the goo tubes. GooTube.com, baby. Yeah, y'all know those goo tubes, right? Yeah. You dipped in the goo tubes last time? It's the Resident Evil level.

It's the Resident Evil lab level. Yeah, that's what they've been doing! What? What? That wasn't sure, but now I know! It started with just a house! It was tubes in the last three games, anything to be tubes in this one, too!

He sticks the vial into like this whizzing, whirling centrifuge. He says, I shall try to synthesize as much of the antidote as I can. It will allow us to communicate with Timmy, but only for a short time. Short time? What am I going to say? What if he doesn't want to talk to me? What if he doesn't want to talk to me at all? Trudy, you're spiraling. Trudy, Trudy, Trudy. No, no, no, you're spiraling. It's okay, it's okay. Mothman puts a reassuring hand on your shoulder.

He says, you are his mother. You will find the words when the time is right. I know it. I'm not even his original mother. I'm not, I'm just a robot copy of his original mother. I didn't. No, you're his mom. You're his mom.

I feel like his mom. There you go, then you are. You're the best he has. He's just gonna wanna hear from you. Okay. And then how fast would it take to get to America? It will take eight hours to get to Pichiville. In four hours, I will have this antidote.

Okay. In the meantime, you all appear very wounded. I suggest you avail yourself of my tubes. Time to goo. Goo it up. Hey, Blake, what was, it's been a bit. What happened to the tubes? I suggest you avail yourself of my tools It's been a bit what happens in the tubes the tools reveal things They reveal truths and they reveal dreams. They also stitch you up pretty good. Yeah. Yeah, but we don't have to be naked, right? We do not have to be naked Okay, cool Be a lot cooler if you did.

Here I go. He doesn't say that last part. Mutters it under his breath. Humans, I get older, they stay the same. Oh, god. So as he's guiding you to the tubes, he then he double takes at you, Francis, and he points at the gun that you're using as a leg.

Yeah, what's up? This strikes me as an ineffective way to support yourself. I think my friends are here to support me, so I'm good. What if? And then he hurries over to a closet. What if you wanna go in as a leg? No, but I also know that magically, if it gets removed, it's gonna show back up there again.

That's a magic thing. He opens this closet up, and he's got all of his spare Trudy robot. Oh my god, a walk-in. This is amazing! This is so nice! Yes, I had it installed in my last Renault of the ship. The resale of the ship is going to go through the roof.

He opens up his walk-in Trudy robot parts closet. Why do you have all these? This would, I mean, this is, that's just how I fix Trudy. Okay, but did you get these because of Wintrudi's shop or you had them before? I got these because the evil one He who shall not be mentioned cast aside many Trudy's into the pit outside my home And that is where I gathered the parts that I now use to save the life of this magnificent being before you I do have my eye on you, but I'll allow it

You would do wise not to besmirch my collection of Trudy parts before I have, and he produces a left Trudy leg. I can affix this to you. Ooh la la. Whoa, a wee wah. Very nice. Guys, it's been years since I've heard that. It's like a Christmas story up in here. Do we keep the fishnets on, or?

No, you can take that, it's up to you. Okay, cool. Be a lot cooler if you didn't. I'm getting so many different vibes from you today I'm taking myself into a whole new world. I was just trying to be funny Mothman doesn't actually say Mothman gives you the leg that says do you wish to having a more functional leg than this gun as your leg for sure if you Know way to break the curse on this thing. That'd be great. Sadly. I do not know how to perfect Okay, well let's see what happens then

Extra leg, extra leg. Oh, I already have a third leg. Just to clarify, the curse is not that Brunhilda is your leg, you just put Brunhilda there. On your back, you can just chop her to your back or whatever. Oh, okay, sure, yeah. I'll move it in my back. So yes, if you take the Trudy leg,

you will lose any sort of disadvantages to dexterity or acro bags, you'll get your move speed back. Feliz semana. And I can flag down people for hitchhiking. But only in one direction. Yes, I'll have to stand on the right side of the road. And I can flag down people for hitchhiking. Only in one direction? Yes. I'll have to stand on the right side of the road.

Though in some cities maybe the other direction. Yeah, if we go to Britain I will have to stand on the left side of the road. Martha's like, wait, but first, Trudy, this is your leg, not mine. Are you okay with the boy using your leg as a leg? Of course, anybody can use my leg I have plenty but truly you're taller than him. Oh Well, just chop part of it off I mean I could just put lifters in my other shoe. Okay

The bottom bar I would cut off, you know up to the time that feels weird I don't I'm good. Just let not man install it how he needs to he's the mechanic. Yeah, it's up to you I guess very well Mothman scoops you up into his arms Francis Rips through Hilda off of your leg and throws her into the corner Holy shit, and then dunks you into the one of these tubes and then just drops the spare leg in the tube He dusts his moth hands. Is anyone else getting in the tubes? I'm getting in the tubes.

We all go in the tubes. So the two of you go in the tubes. As we established last time. Beth, raising her hand. Oh, yeah. Trudy. I was drinking. And so I couldn't be on mic to say I want to go in the tubes.

So I bought myself some time by raising my hand loudly in the air. Everyone goes in the tubes. Trudy, because she is a robot, does not go into the tubes. She gets patched up by Mothman. By Mothman's big arms. By his, you know, it's like a sort of... Trudy, if you like, try to get fresh, go ahead and knock on my tube. She's not going to be knocking on your tube if Mothman starts getting fresh.

That's true, that's right. I don't know what you're talking about. I don't know what either of you are talking about. What's better than a well marbled ribeye sizzling on the barbecue? A well marbled ribeye sizzling on the barbecue that was carefully selected by an Instacart shopper and delivered to your door. A well marbled ribeye you ordered without even leaving the kiddie pool. Whatever groceries your summer calls for, Instacart has you covered.

Download the Instacart app and enjoy zero dollar delivery fees on your first three orders. Service fees, exclusions, and terms apply. Instacart. Groceries that over-deliver. We will start with Kelsey's Tube. So all of these things are happening simultaneously. Your tube, you tube. You tube.

My tube. My tube's red. Nice. Kelsey, you float in inky blackness, silence, comfort. It's like you just died and you're hearing a podcast as the lights go out. You've never felt more serene. And then you hear, Kelsey, is that you?

Uh, yeah, it's me. Who's this? The light starts to trickle into the room and you are in the closet of Roz's house. And you're hiding in this closet with Milton. Oh, what age am I? Uh, you're an adult. This is an outing. Milton, what? Oh, this is a tube thing, huh? Oh, it worked. It worked.

OK, wow. And you see Milton has this spell book in front of him that he's focusing on. Even though he can't read it, he's drawing a psychic energy from it. I tried to reach you last time, and I only got Blake. Kelsey, Ms. Kramer, things are really bad down here. Things are really bad.

I know you guys are. We're back here in Peachyville. And as he says that, you hear this bang on door, you hear something like pounding on the door outside, you hear Roz's voice and she says Milton, you just keep your head down in there. Okay, it's gonna be all right. Mommy's gonna protect you. And you're a glass window shattering your rifle shotgun off. Ross, I want to try to open the door.

You can kind of phase through the into the living. I'm not actually there. Yeah. Okay. Milton, listen to your mother. Stay there. I'm going to see what's happening. OK, it's just I have something important to tell you. OK, what? No, tell me. Tell me.

So I just I think it's getting pretty bad out there. And I think that something bad might be happening soon to me. And before that happens, there's something I need to give you that I'm stupid. And I should have given it to you a long time ago. But I was scared. When I was a little kid, I found this in the house. And he pulls out, he's got his backpack with him,

he takes it out of his backpack, and he's trembling as he holds it. He has this notebook, like a composition notebook. You recognize it for like a split second, you're like, this was what he grabbed at the library. Back when you guys were in that library labyrinth where you guys were all getting a book sort of thrust upon you by the library.

I got my brother's journal. Yes. This is the book that was given to him. He says, I know I got it at the library, but I had it before. I knew it just by grabbing it because I could never forget it. When I found it, it had all these dates in it and these names next to the dates. I thought it was really funny because the first name on there was Grandma Miltretts. Then on the day that was the date in the book, that was the day that she died. I just thought it was a weird coincidence, but then I saw another name of a kid at school,

and I saw a date and it was coming up. I went to tell him, I went to warn him, and he died anyway. It happened again. When was this? This was when I was a little kid. I was six years old. You remember Grandma Miltred, right? And that kid at school, Bobby Bobby and then it just kept happening and it was like no matter what I did You know, my mom thought I was crazy I was trying to tell her and then you know, they said that it was the day that you know

Like there was something I was having bad dreams and whether I warned them or not It was just one person after another kept dying I didn't know what to do and so I just tried to bury the book in the woods and forget about it because Well, there's there are two things about the book that scared me so much I never wanted to look at it anymore and one was the last page at the last page that I don't even want to talk about it but the last page of the book is really scary can you show me so he's just holding the book tight it's okay

he said miss Kramer there's there's one other thing you need to know and that's why I want to give the book to you is That there's one name in here that there's no date, and I can't I can barely even read it And it's your name And it's the one name. I can't find in the book of everybody in peachyville is the one name. That's not in here So I don't know it's why I've always felt safe around you because I felt like whatever bad thing was gonna happen It wasn't gonna happen to you, and so whenever I would get scared I would you know I would I would just anyway I just I know that I know that

sometimes I can be annoying and I know that sometimes you know it's just I just know it that you know maybe you don't like me but I just I just want you to know that I really like you and I really I really think that that maybe this book was meant for you and I shouldn't have taken in the first place and I'm sorry and he hands you this book and I hold it you hold it in your hands and as you hold it the lights in the house start to flicker and you hold it in your hands and as you hold it the lights in the house start to flicker and you feel physically in your body like the whole room and world begin to shake around you just for a second like there's this

tremor I try to touch the door like I actually feel the door instead of phasing through it no you're still phasing through it weirdly enough it's just like everything shimmers around you for a second you hear the door beginning to break down, and you hear Roz just erupt in sort of like a protective motherly lioness rage as she fires off another shot at someone outside, and then you wake up.

Do I have the book with me? You do. Whoa! Which is like sitting a goo and I just open my book, open my goo tube. Sure, yeah, yeah. I want to slip to the last page. To the last page, you see hundreds and hundreds of names

of just tiny, tiny fonts, scrolling down the last two pages of this book, and they all have the same date, and it's two days from now. Two days is gonna be the days. Yeah. Blake. Yes. Silence.

Find yourself. Blissful silence. Silence. Find yourself. Blissful silence. Floating in a ethereal void. It's like the silence right after a toilet has been flushed. But before the little... Before the little fludgy thing starts filling up the tank again. The little serene moment. That's a serene moment.

That's a tense moment. Yeah. Because you're not sure if you gotta open open the back up and jiggle the thing I make this moment pregnant with expectation. Where is the water and then? You find yourself standing by a beautiful stream Flowing in a sort of ethereal cosmic garden a good water flow. It's got the vibe of like you ever watch kung fu panda Yes, do you remember when his mentor like dies and turns into like cherry blossoms or whatever? Yeah.

And it's super beautiful. It's like that. It's that kind of thing. One day there will be an animated movie about this place. I only wish that I could have seen that movie with you, sir. And you see- My main man! Ambruster! Round the corner. Ambruster, my main dog, but how are you here?

I have traversed beyond the veil of life and death. I have died and soon I will move on to the other side. Blake, my son. What is holding you here? What is holding me here is one last thing. One last thing I must show you, old friend. I never told you how I learned the art of the Gun Cartas. Yes, it was a mystery, despite all my probing all those long nights in campfires.

The secret of the Gun Cartas is passed from master to student after the master has died. Fucking so sick, I knew it. I fucking knew it. And so, as my master came to me after he died and his master came to him I know come to you. I am ready and he pulls out two gold plated guns to gold plate in 1911s like in face off And he sets them before you and he says to be very very clear He sets them when they're it's like in the game hitman when they're both like apparently, you know saying yeah, like they look like two L's

Next to each other so that when you yeah If you have two handguns, and you don't set them down that way what do you even get? Why did you get to get you get two handguns alternate configurations when they're both facing the other? Oh, yeah, I like that. Yeah, yeah, either way symmetrical and opposed symmetrical and opposed He sets them down in the grass and he bows serenely to you and says just time to begin your training He looks and I've already have both guns in my hands. Except you don't. What?

Because as you reach for the guns, your, as we established, phobia of guns kicks in. Oh no! And you spasm with fear and throw up violently on the ground. Amberstor, my relationship with firearms is not what they used to be. What?

What has happened to you, my boy? My god! I'm freaked out and scared by them now. They are loud and go bang. You fear the coolest object in the universe, a gold-bladed gun. It is a source of pain for you. It pains me because my eyes see them and somewhere deep in my reptilian brain, I know that these are two objects that I must hold in my hands and yet and yet But I see cold twinge of fear grips me by the neck and shakes me about it is nothing It is nothing boy try push through focus focus your energy on the gun center yourself, okay? I'd like to roll the center myself. Okay. Go ahead and focus on the guns. What's that? Just give me a d100

24 doesn't work He versus other than also there and he just shakes his head at you as you kiss and throw up for 24 seconds as you Try to hold the guns and that's just you in the fucking knee and ask you where the bomb is Ambruster just weeps as he watches you Maybe you can teach that other man over there for clearly I am no longer a good student Kiefer's like yes, that's just like him. He sounds just like keifer right there Let me do my key for subtle impression as a Christmas tree As Kiefer suddenly tackles a Christmas tree in the background amber stir kneels down before you and says it seems then

That the secret of the gun card dies with me. That's too fucked up, Amberster. That's the most fucked up thing you've ever said. Don't shed a tear. I promise life without guns can be cool and fulfilling. I don't understand what you mean by that. It's enshrined in our constitution, Amberster. I was just trying to make you feel better, oh boy.

Just a heavy burden you carry now. But, so I get alone the ancient arts dies with you But what's it and then I look to the left and it's like a literally like an avatar when there's just lines of guys Masters going back somehow thousands of years of the gun that guy was just really good at throwing two rocks With a trembling hand is as my time fading, the line will be broken soon. I cannot give you knowledge of the gun cartas but- What else you got for me my main man? I've seen beyond the veil. Any question you ask, I will try to answer it as best I can.

Okay so like god, real or not? Is that the one- you have time for one question before I disappear, so I just want to give you one second more to think about- Beyond the veil, yes, very important. Is there a way we get out of this and we can save Peachyville AND the world? In your head you hear, maybe not a yes or no question. And how would that be done? How is it-

Semicolon. Semicolon. Semicolon. Semicolon. Is there any way that we get through this and Pichiville and the world survives? Semicolon. And how might we go about doing that? And please glaze me a little bit. First off, that's an incredibly cool question that you asked. And I really think you, Junique, among people would ask such a wise and selfless question,

Blake. I like how this is going so far. The answer to the first part of your question is yes, there's a way to save Peachyville. Good thing I was a multipartner. The answer to the second part of your question is seek the sinking light, Blake. Seek the sinking light Blake seek the sinking light As he fades away the whole world shudders the stars above you seem to flicker and twitch and then off in the eastern Quadra of the sky a new star is more the constellation of two guns the ember star

The ember star is born and you wake up. I look at my hands and I go what have I become Francis yeah, because you are soul bound with Brunhilde finally or you are you know psychically bound with Brianna you get two dreams We'll start with Brunhilde's dream you experience this as well You're in a hut in a village somewhere in the Middle Ages. Air is crisp and cool around you. This woman is mixing herbs in a cauldron. She's like a sort of herbalist medicine woman. It's tranquil, it's serene as she hums lightly to herself. She feels this sharp twang in her gut as her unborn baby kicks at her

stomach. And she is she's brewing this potion. She hears screaming and horses trampling in the distance. She hears the splitting cry of a horn. And she knows that her village is being attacked. There's the din of battle growing closer and closer. Hurryedly she grabs the essentials. She knows she'll need to flee into the forest and to take care of herself and her child who's due any day now. She bursts forth from her hut and she sees raiders from a neighboring Germanic tribe circling the village, cutting down everybody she knows in one bloody spear stab after another. She sees the leader of this raiding party, massive, fearsome on this steed rear up. The sky behind him seems to darken

and lightning cracks as thunder pours down and she locks eyes with this fearsome warrior and she runs for her life and for the life of her child, just slipping through the mud and stumbling around and she can hear it happen behind her. She hears the horse neigh and buck up and she can almost make out of the cracking lightning the sound of this spear sailing through the air and then piercing through her stomach

and piercing through her child. And she collapses onto the ground. And as she hears this warrior dismount from their horse and step towards her under the mud. Fear and hatred above all else fill her heart. And she whispers in an ancient tongue, a curse, a dark oath. And at the end of it, she says the name of her daughter, Brunhilde. And the soul of this child transfers into this spear. And as this soldier picks it up and pulls it out of her stomach a hateful energy seeps into him. He controls the spear but the spear controls him. Who saves who right? The dream shifts and swirls and suddenly the warrior Horrify stands over his entire clan slain by his own spear

in his own hand. He drops it as more warriors surge around him to bring him to justice. The spear lays there in the dirt, getting lashed by wind and rain. For centuries we see it travel from one place to the next, inflicting whoever touches it with this malign desire to kill, to wreak vengeance on innocent life as its own innocent blood was shed. And as Brunhilde travels over the years, we see her form shift in shape to match whatever the weapon of the day is,

the crossbow, the saber, the musket, until finally she's lying in a ditch in World War I and a soldier drops dead next to her and she sees a rifle, and slowly her form turns into a rifle and then Wait, what was she before that when she was in the ditch before she turned into a rifle? This was a five-year period where it went back to rocks again You know, I think it was probably she was a saber on one of those guys

Like in the cavalry charge Quickly learned that they were outflanked by machine guns and then got gunned down. I love this. This is cool. It does imply fetal personhood though. Curses begin at conception. That's all I'm gonna say. Yeah, that's fair. And then she, in World War II, takes her form as you knew her in the hands of a Nazi sniper in his Kar98k rifle who eventually turned the weapon on himself and then was discovered by your father. As he picks up the weapon and a dark thought comes over him to what he can do with this gun and who he might give it to, you feel reality shudder and shake and warp around

you, and then you wake up floating once again over the skies of Peachyville and you're now once again astral projecting this is now a triple-a open-world dream sequence What would you like to do? Do I have my full body and no Brunhilde as no Brunhilde? You're 100 Francis right now Brunhilde is not here as far as you can tell. Go go go go Trying to remember where were we gonna go before all this mishigas? Would you like me to just describe I can paint the picture a little bit for you? Go for it. It's rowdy out here.

The first thing you notice is that there's surprisingly few, because normally like when you're astral projecting, you can see these glowing embers of where people are asleep, right? Like they sort of ping, they radiate for you a little bit more. And it seems like almost everybody is awake and there's a tremendous amount of activity in the town. You hear an air raid siren droning. You see people frantically boarding up their houses.

If you peer into the houses, you can kind of see through the walls and you see people hunkering down in fear. And then you also see trucks and jeeps patrolling and circling around the streets. Bisons in their robes and masks are going from door to door, and they seem to be grabbing people and dragging them into these trucks. Jesus Christ.

That guy should definitely have a helmet and some helmet pads and some knee pads. Behind you you hear, yeah, it's going pretty bad out there. How you doing? Hey Sticky Pete. Hey Francis. Where you been? I missed you out here in the astral realm around in Russia. They don't have the astral and they haven't built it yet I got explains why I haven't seen you around. Yeah, you guys must have really kicked the hornets nest The cult is going crazy down there. Yeah, I want to look and see if any of those quasi brainwashed

I have to take a trip can't be late people are still walking Somewhere because I want to know where they're walking to and go there. Oh! Nice! You remember the Andersons saying that they were all heading towards the corn hub. Then I would like to go to the corn hub. You fly over there, you see this big clearing, like this big, almost like a crop circle in the ground

and like a pit. And as far as you can tell, this was a pit dug by human hands, but there's no one in there anymore. It seems like whoever was gathering here, they seem to have dispersed after the dollmaker died. Oh, dang, dude. You're too late.

Or they went back to their homes. You can't quite tell what happened. Okay. Well, not my problem. I guess I will try to find my dad or my mom. My mom. My mom. I care more about my mom at this point.

Okay, great. Damn. So you're able to kind of hone in on them, and you see your parents back at your house, and they are both pondering an orb, dude. They're just straight up orb pondering. They got a big ol' fucking crystal. Are they fully clothed? Give me a luck roll. Oh god!

Hahaha! I failed. Okay, well then they're both buck ass naked. That's your biggest fear of a parent is your- That'd be wild if Will was like, okay, then they're clothes. Damn. Oh geez. Three-piece suits for everyone. So in the orb that they are pondering you see flashes of people's faces That seem to be denizens of Peachville. It's almost like they're scrying in to see where these people are

They're so harnessing their psychic power together to do this, which is why they're so entranced that they can't really notice that you are there because they're sort of occupied doing this. And you see some faces that you recognize. You see one of the Anderson brothers. You see some kids from school. You see Shane Jr., in fact, and then you see Milton for a split second. He seems to be talking to somebody off screen and he's hiding in a closet somewhere. He seems to be talking to somebody off screen and he's hiding in a closet somewhere. As this is happening, your mother in a trance is just muttering names and addresses,

almost like she's speaking tongues, but she seems to be projecting this out somewhere. Your father, from his one remaining eye, he seems to be participating in this ritual, but you can sense that he feels conflicted. He's sort of watching half in trance but half in horror at what's happening around him. In fact you see a tear rolling down his eye. It's almost like he wishes he could stop this but he can't. And then for a second he breaks his concentration and he looks directly at you. What's up soy boy? He starts to grow fearful and he's like don't come back. Stay away. You could stop this, you cuck.

Stay away, I can't, it's too late, but you have to stay away. If we can't turn you into Zuzel, the Fairly says I can protect you from what's about to happen here. And then he goes back into his trance. Geez, rude. Is there anything I can do, Astraly,

magic-y shit to like the orb? To the orb? Yes. Oh sure, yeah, you get the sense that you could dive into that orb? Yes. Oh sure, yeah. You get the sense that you could dive into that orb and talk to your parents. Whoa. Okay, I'm going in. Okay.

You dive into the orb, I will say unfortunately because the orb is at ground height and they're sitting on the ground, you're basically eyeball to eyeball with their naughty bits right now. As you dive into the orb. First of all, you. Second of all, mek-lek-a-hai, mek-a-hai-ni-ho. Third of all, what the fuck are you doing? Francis? Your mother's like, Francis, second of all, mek-a-lek-a-hai, mek-a-hai-ni-ho, third of all, what the fuck you doing? Francis? You're in shit.

Your mother's like, Francis, where are you? At a height I would prefer not to be, so if you could answer me as quickly as possible, that'd be great. Francis, stay away! You chose your path, Francis, and we chose ours. So as far as I'm concerned, this has nothing to do with you. Well, I'm gonna come back anyway, so if I'm gonna come back, why don't you tell me where I shouldn't be?

What? You know, like where all the ruckus is happening, so I can be sure to be away from it. Why would I tell you anything? Yeah, that's fair enough. You are such a disappointment. Oh, no boo. And then she, just surge of energy,

slams both of her hands onto the orb, and this sort of like dark light seems to crack through them and pierce into your mind as she sort of forcibly injects you from this crystal. And you find yourself launched back up into the sky. Pshoo. And you can sense your dream coming to a close. But before you do, something odd strikes you,

which is as you cast around town again, like I said, not a lot of people asleep right now. One person who does seem to be asleep is Dr. Dog. And she's just sort of like asleep on the ground in the veterinary office. I'm gonna jump into her then. As you fly down to Dr. Dog's office, you see first of all the door is wide open,

never a great sign. There's a car missing. Once they're open. It's middle of the night. These are never a great sign. You want to fucking air condition the entire neighborhood? You fly in and you can see that someone's left here in a hurry and you see in the back room

on the ground, Dr. Dog, and the doll maker is basically up on a big slab where she had been doing an autopsy and you see that she's dreaming. Okay, I'm gonna jump into her dream. You jump into her dream and she's sort of living a sort of flashback on loop right now. And you see her like basically like just looking fucking cool as hell like Scully when she's doing those autopsies on the X files just like dissecting and she's like now opening the fourth stomach cavity of the entity known as the dollmaker contents seem to be partially digested bits of bone and teeth and And then she reaches in and she hears something clink and she pulls out this blue key

She looks at it and she's like What the fuck is that and then right as she does that? Gregor her assistant who is the tall guy who likes jokes, stoopid, bashes her on the back of the head with a bone, with a dog bone, and just cracks her over the skull and she crumples to the floor. He picks up the key and you can see the tattoos on his arm

and you see a tattoo of a bison on his arm. And he takes the key and starts walking out the door. Oh man. And as that happens... So we only got two out of three keys now? Is that right? Yeah. Is there anything you would like... Where am I supposed to go today?

I think... Let me take out my notebook, my schedule. I'm going to... Let me check my little handy calendar for when my appointment is. There's a kid outside that's like, hey, Mr. Gregor, where are you going? I will say this. As you see him going, you feel in your bones that you've been zooming around the astral plane

enough times now that you get the sense that if you spent all of your energy and thus woke up, you could do one thing in the physical world right now. Whoa. As Gregor's walking away? Yes, like one small thing. You can't like rip the key out of his hand Well, you could rip the key out of his hands if you wanted to you just won't be able to take it back with you Give me clear constraints on what am I physically doing because if I'm non-corporeal I'm reaching into his fucking heart

I'm closing one of the valves. Oh damn. Oh damn. Damn dude Hey, I can say with certainty if like superpowers showed up Anthony would be utilizing them in the most crazy I love that okay, so he's the Joker of this group for sure. I was gonna say that yes That's a laugh. Oh shit I was gonna say that yes You have the ability to like affect something physical in the world around you, but I really like that describe it to me Roll for Kalima So I come up behind him after seeing the bison tattoo,

and I sort of like put my hand out flat-palmed, sort of aligned vertically, and I just stick it into his back, and I feel like a little bit of resistance from the bone, so I just push a little bit harder, and I feel the bone begin to get soft under my hands, almost like, um... Almost like when you... Yeah, almost like when I'm, you know, when I'm done, when after, you know? And I keep pushing past it and I feel viscous fluid and viscera sort of crawling up my arm.

It's getting, I feel like when you're, if you're a winger with your, I can feel his heart, cause it's the boom, boom, boom, boom. Cause he's beating. And I search around for any sort of valve or anything that I know is connected to the part And I just start basically plucking everything I can and just pulling things out and just trying to generally make a mess of things I world my hand around like a fucking whisk Easier destroy things and fix things you know you don't to be a surgeon in there

You're pulling his heart basically yes literally pulling his heartstrings. Yeah. So as you do that, Gregor staggers and drops the key and clutches at his heart, absolutely terrified because he has no idea what's going on. Tell you what it is, Gregor, a high cholesterol diet. That's the last thought that goes through his head as his heart bursts in his chest and he just stares down at himself, astonished, and then crumples dead onto the floor, staring at the key that is now sitting outstretched from his palm. Cool. And as he dies, there's only one sound he hears. And then you wake up. Trudy. For the last couple hours, Mothman has been patching you back up, you know, swapping out servos, putting in new parts, you know, like just- Have I been awake?

Have you? I don't know. It's up to you. I guess, yeah. But I think I'm into like a lower consciousness state. Oh, okay, I like that. Safe mode, safe mode. Yes, you're in safe mode.

Yeah, safe mode. In case, you know, he crosses a wire or something like that. Or you're pretending to be asleep, but you're awake. Yes. Yes. And in my head, I'm like, great job. In case you know he crosses a wire And in my head I'm like great job Oh, wow You feel him putting a couple of the last bolts in on you and then he runs his hand through your hair and presses this

Little button on the back of your head and you come back to like full consciousness and he says your repairs are complete There is one more thing, a cosmetic thing. Oh, what do you, what do you, what does that mean? What do you mean by cosmetic thing? And he shows you your face, which is all blown apart and melted from the radiation. And you don't love me like that? I was about to say, to me, your face is

and always will be acceptable. Oh! But if you, I just, if you wanted, I know that sometimes people like their face to look a certain way and while to me your face will always be a face worth looking at, I know that some- I want Timmy to see me as the mom he remembers.

Yes, okay, excuse me. And then he goes over, he comes back with like a Trudy face that he's peeled off of like one of these other skulls back there. Oh no. They took her face off. That sort of like sharp little pointy end

protrudes from one of his fingers and he starts like slicing these little pieces off of it. Just sort of tenderly laying them onto your exoskeleton and then using a little bit of, it's like a suture, start stitching your face back, and then using a little bit of, it's like a suture, start stitching your face back together, and then putting a little makeup on it to just, you know, kind of completely, you know, just like,

he's really good at it. He's like, why is he watching makeup videos? But as he's doing it, this sort of like, tense silence lingers in the air, and he says to you, have you thought more about what you wish to say to your son? I think I thought that when I saw him that I would know what to say. But now I'm not so sure. Do you feel ready to speak to him?

Maybe I'm not ready, but that's what I want more than anything. I understand this feeling. How? In my world, there is a light, a great light in the sky, that when we look at it, we know our way home. And we don't know why it gives us comfort to look at it, but our lives revolve around it. This light glows and it is home for us. And I sense that for you, your son is much the same. It is a drive that brings you back to him that you follow it leads your way to where you need to go I don't know does this sound it was stupid never mind

No, that's not stupid. I My world used to be very small, you know, and then I realized with all of my friends that it's much, much, much bigger. And that's really scary because sometimes I know that the world is just one person for me. And so I want to protect him and I want the world to be okay for him. And so I don't know what I'm gonna say to him. If I were your son, then I am not. I think to hear these words from you would mean much.

Trudy, I, and he turns, no, it is nothing, nevermind. I can't, I can't. Trudy, I, there's something Moth Jesus wishes to tell you. What, what is it? I no longer see the light of my home, for a new light is the light that I follow. Oh my goodness. And it is the light that I see in your,

and then right as he's about to finish his sentence, you hear beep, beep, beep, the antidote is done, the antidote is finished. Okay, yes, yes, of course. And he rushes over to the antidote. This sort of machine kind of pops open and he takes this little vial out. And he says, what you wish to say to your son is for you and for him alone.

I shall give you your privacy. Thank you. Here, let me show you the code. I don't know if Kelsey told you the code. Okay, well. And then he shows you how to beep-boop your way past the door. He says, I will be out here.

Just being fine. I will be out here being fine Okay, and he's sort of like just sheepish and a little flustered feeling like he said too much It goes and starts busily tightening up the laboratory Trudy punches in the code 5 8 0 0 8 It's upside down and in a mirror The door slides open, and again, you see this dark, resonant crystal. You see your son lying on a cot, and you enter? Give me a spot hidden rule.

I got 30. Got 30? Yes. You step in, and as you step in, you notice that little moth that led you all the way through the facility, back in Russia, and onto the ship. You see the moth follow you into the room as the door slides in Russia and onto the ship you see the moth follow you into the room as the door slides shut.

Timmy is lying in front of you, you hear this engine buzzing, the moth starts circling the engine. What would you like to do? I'm gonna turn to the moth and be like can I have some privacy please? The moth sort of like scoots up into like a little vent in the corner of the room. Okay. And then she injects Timmy in his arm with the venom. You see a sort of glowing line appear in his vein as it sort of runs up and you can almost see it like spread through his body and then he stirs awake. What what what happened? Where am I? Timmy? Mom? Oh baby it's so good to hear your voice. Mom. And see you. Mom, where am I?

What's going on? Sorry, that's complicated. We're on a ship and Moth Jesus has saved us and are you okay? Oh mom, I was so scared. I'm here now. Okay, okay, okay. And he gets up and he hugs you. Oh, Timmy.

I'm so scared, mom. I'm still so scared. And then you see he starts shaking and he starts gripping you tighter and tighter. No, don't... You're okay. Something's wrong. What do you mean? Something's wrong. I can feel it. Something's wrong.

What's wrong? What's wrong? It's here. He's here. He's here. The moth? They're here. It's here. He's here. Timmy, no, no, no. You're okay. You're okay. I promise. You see him scouring back and like pushing back and he's looking at something over your shoulders. Trudy is going to turn around. So you turn around and as you turn around,

the lights begin to flicker in the room and the reality around you begins to shudder and shake and you see this moth and it shimmers for a split second and then it's replaced in an instant by relish wet. God damn it! The sunburned man. Shouldn't have trusted that moth. And he looks at you and says,

thank you for your assistance, Ms. Drought. This deafening screech emits from him and you find yourself frozen. Both you and Timmy are just paralyzed as he takes one step after another towards that pulsing dark crystal in the middle of the room. And you see Mothman on the other side of the glass pounding frantically trying to get in, but it's like he can't. And as Relish Wet steps towards this dark light. It's like a lot of tumblers in a lock I'll start clicking together in place in your mind

as you have this horrible epiphany and you realize that you've just been one teeny tiny part of a plan that's been stretching both ways in time and space for hundreds of years to get relish wet to this exact moment. You remember him saving your life the night where Tucker drove that screwdriver into your brain. He gave you this peppermint and that peppermint was the first thing you saw that sort of brought you back to life. It was how you met Mothman. It was how you and Mothman came together. Now Mothman started to develop feelings for you. It was like all of this was preordained that the two of you would meet, that he would be lured into this trap that they would get this ship, but they would need some way to get into this room,

to get to this pulsing crystal in the middle of it, and he knew that Mothman would lead you in here. It's like the whole reason you exist almost, it was to bring you here, and as that comes to your head, you see him reach in and grab this crystal and rip it out of its sort of like hovering stasis field that exists in the heart of the ship, and he holds it in his hand. And this guy has had just this dead-eyed, expressionless face the entire time that you've seen him. And as he holds it, like his skin starts peeling back more and more, and his face peels up into this rectus grin,

and you can see tears streaming down his eyes as he says, at last, Vicky, the hour of the whole. He sort of curls his fist around it and it's like it absorbs into his body. He starts glowing and strobing all of these strange colors and he turns into this beam of light that pierces both ways through the ship, tearing a hole straight through it, straight into the sky.

And as you feel the air rushing from outside here in the stratosphere, and you feel the ship begin to plummet for a split second, you look up into the sky and you see an explosion. And you see a hole get torn into the stars. whole get torn into the stars. Mother, mother, fear me I am the broken sky All I ever wanted was to feel so ordinary In a world that lies twisted in my mind and now I'm gone All that I can see is a hole in the star Swallowing my dreams and making them scars

Making them scars, too far, too far away But I'll stay today It stars Ashley Birch and Jordan Rodriguez and you can find links on our website We're all gonna die movie comm or in the description of this episode But if you crave more Dungeons and Daddies while there's only one place to get that and that's our patreon feed We do an after show or we talk about the episode we just recorded and answer listener questions Here's when we got last episode about sex scenes and movies as a father I am so looking forward to being on the other side of the like, oh no the sex scene came on while my fucking night to being on the other side of the like, oh no, the sex scene came on while my parents were in the room. A fucking nightmare. I'm so pumped for that too. It's gonna be so embarrassing.

Just gonna be fucking embarrassing to shit out of my kids so hard, dude. Looks just like your mom. Oh no. Support this show directly and get gobs of bonus audio and visual content at patreon.com slash dungeons and dads. Dungeons and Daddies is Matt Arnold, is Kelsey Grammer, Anthony Burch,

is Frances Farnsworth, Will Campos is our DM, Beth May is Trudy Trout, and myself, Freddie Wong is Tony Collette. Our theme song is A Hole in the Stars by Max and Waller, Anissa Omran is our content producer, Ashley Nicolette is our community manager, Courtney Terry is our community coordinator, Cindy Denton is our merchandise manager, Estrellas is our lead editor, Travis Reeves, Omar Romolino, and Brian Fernandez provide additional editing. Shout out to our Patreon supporters, folks like Feta Oost, Cole, Anika O'Donoghue, Oats, Tyler Mogar, Karen Bartlett, O'Neil Infante, Sam Lohn, Metzing Merton, Shark252, Jared

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All that I can see is a hole in the star. Swallowin' my dreams and makin' them scars. Too far, too far away. Swallowing my dreams and making them scars Too far, too far away But I'll stay today All that I can see is a hole in the stars Smiling in my dreams and making them scars Too far, too far away But I'll stay today Got 30? Yes. You can see that he's dead. No! That'd be such a good way to reveal that. What's better than a well marbled ribeye sizzling on the barbecue? A well marbled ribeye sizzling on the barbecue that was carefully selected by an Instacart shopper and delivered to your door.

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