Ear Biscuits with Rhett & Link - 112: Who Was The First Person to Shave? | Ear Biscuits Ep. 112

Episode Date: September 18, 2017

Rhett & Link dive down the rabbit hole to see if they can untangle the knot of when and why people began shaving, their own feelings on the future of humanity, and if they'd get implanted memories on this week's Ear Biscuits. SUBSCRIBE to This Is Mythical: https://goo.gl/UMXvuW Listen to Ear Biscuits at:  Apple Podcasts: http://apple.co/29PTWTM Spotify: http://spoti.fi/2oIaAwp Art19: https://art19.com/shows/ear-biscuits SoundCloud: https://soundcloud.com/earbiscuits Follow This Is Mythical: Facebook: http://facebook.com/ThisIsMythical Instagram: http://instagram.com/ThisIsMythical Twitter: http://twitter.com/ThisIsMythical Other Mythical Channels: Good Mythical Morning: https://www.youtube.com/user/rhettandlink2 Good Mythical MORE: https://youtube.com/user/rhettandlink3 Rhett & Link: https://youtube.com/rhettandlink To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This, this, this, this is Mythical. Welcome to Ear Biscuits, I'm Link. And I'm Rhett. This week at the round table of dim lighting, we are doing something totally new for us. Experimental. We're going down the rabbit hole. And what I mean by that is we asked you guys a question

on Facebook and Twitter and we said- It's not a hole on a rabbit. No. It's a rabbit that a hole goes into. Right. Well, it's not that either. Yeah, it's a conversation that starts from something and turns into whatever it might turn into with no agenda.

And then turns into something else and then turns into something else. That is the rabbit hole. Oh my goodness. Now we're gonna go down that rabbit hole and let me, so we asked you the question, what are you thinking right now? And then Cody and Jacob actually collected.

Well, they put one in this envelope. They collected one answer and we don't know what it is and it's in this envelope. And so we're just gonna read what one of you was thinking and that's gonna be the thing that starts us down the rabbit hole. That's what the meat of this Ear Biscuit is going to be. Just an experimental format, just to try something.

Yeah, I'll talk more about what I think about it and why I'm excited about it. But we're not gonna start there. When we're on the edge of the hole. Yeah, wait till we're on the precipice of the hole. We got one foot in the hole. I can see the hole from here, but we gotta walk up to it. And the way I wanna walk up to it

is just to give you an update. And also to give you an update, today is one of those rare days, Rhett, where we don't see each other until right now. Yeah, we need more of those. We should. You read my mind. See, you can't take that

as if I didn't wanna not be with you either. No, I miss you a lot today, Rhett. I'm very curious what happened when we were apart. I thought about you. We did a divide and conquer day of work. Yeah. I went to the beach, man. Can't you see my tan?

No, I did work. No, okay, good. I'll tell you what I did. That is kind of what I'm asking. Prove that you were working as hard as me. Oh, I'll show you. Without me there. Oh, I'll show you. Yeah, so we got some catching up to do. We can't go a day without catching up on that.

You want me to tell you what I did? Well, in general, we split up for me to go to Buddy System Post and for you, I presume, to lay in more of the details associated with our live show. Lay in while laying out at the beach. The tour of Mythicality. Yeah, right, no, I wasn't laying out at the beach.

I was here at the office. I was, we've got a pretty good idea of what we're gonna do on the tour of Mythicality. I'm just filling out some of those details and writing some different suggestions that we can explore together and land on the specific creative, but I'm excited about it.

It's gonna be a good show. I saw your guitar by your desk. My guitar. It's usually near the GMM desk, not your office desk. So does that mean you were working up the tune that we discussed? I may or may not have come up with a really great way

to extend a song that is an old song that's very fitting for that night that we're gonna sing, first song we're gonna sing unless things change. Okay, yeah. And it's updated. Nice. And you know, it's, most of the update's on you though. I made the update but I gave you the responsibility

for the update. Right, that's- You'll understand what this means later. Hmm, okay, you don't wanna go ahead and tell me? Well, I was, let's see, today I watched the final episode of season two of Buddy System for the first time. So that means I've seen the whole thing now, as of today.

You have not. Nope, I've only seen one through seven. Yeah, so episode eight I watched and boy, I'm just like. Did you cry? I was in a critical giving feedback mode, you know how it is, the first time you see it, you just, it doesn't wash over you

like you're an audience member because you're already thinking too critically about, okay, this is not what I expected. This is what we can tweak. This is how we can make this better or re-edit it to make it deliver in the way that we want it. So I will say yes, there was a lot of emotion involved, a lot of that comedic emotion, which is always good,

that it was funny, but oh yeah, I think it's gonna work. It's not quite there yet, but I'm really excited. But I mean, the first thing, and I say this after the first time I watch every single episode, is what have we done? This is so nuts. episode is what have we done? This is so nuts. I mean, we said this throughout the whole process, but it was weird because now that I've seen it all,

it's like, okay, I do feel like it's getting close to being over, but it actually ain't. Because then I- There's a lot of steps. Then I had to go back to episode one because that's in the final stages of putting it all together and sitting in like this theater and finalizing the sound mix. This is tedious work.

You would hate it. Then now that's why I don't do it. That's why you're not there and I'm there because I relish the details. Right. So I have to keep perspective and make sure that I'm giving because I relish the details. Right. So I have to keep perspective and make sure that I'm giving notes on the right things and not taking too long.

I mean, it's so tedious, man. We listened to the whole mix. And the whole point is to get every little sound at the right level and emphasize the right things and make sure you don't lose comedy. And we listened to the whole thing and then we start giving notes when we realized that the background track was muted the whole time.

And we didn't fully realize it. What do you mean? They add like room. Room tone. Room tone, ambience, like if you're outside, you add like, oh, we're in a park. So there's like park noise and stuff like that. And it adds a level of scrutiny to everything else

that's a little unfair. So if you got it right without room tone, that seems like the way to do it, and then to add the room tone in after that. Except then you gotta watch it all again. And so, and watching it again is not just 22 to 30 minutes, it could be an hour of watching the game, because I don't know, there are frustrating moments,

but it's a lot of work, I mean, once you get in there. But we shouldn't both be doing it. Well, of course not. And I do enjoy it, don't get me wrong. I know, what I enjoy is what I did today in terms of buddy system is I enjoy looking at the cut, putting down time code, and making all my notes and sending in an email.

To me. Knowing that you are gonna be the one that, if I'm like, we really need another take of this, I don't wanna be the one watching the five takes of that. I want you to be the one watching the five takes of that. Yeah, I got your. But I know when we need a new take, but I don't wanna be the one finding it five takes of that. Yeah, I got your. But I know when we need a new take, but I don't wanna be the one finding it.

And I got your email and I immediately counted, I was like one, two, three, four, and I counted all the notes he had. Quite a few notes on this episode. My heart kinda sunk, and then, but I feel like if I would've sent you that email, you'd have like hit trash and been like, oh, I got this. Well, I don't.

And none of this really matters. But at a certain point you wanna talk yourself into that, that it's like. But I put, I did episode six, which I think the reason I gave so many notes is because, I mean I like all the episodes. I just feel sorry for you guys who don't have YouTube Red. I know some of you are in places that you just can't get it.

You can't even buy the shows individually. And then some of you are just in a situation where you're just not gonna pay for it. I wish it was something that every mythical beast could see. Season one and especially season two. Just because it's another level. Well I think it's becoming more and more accessible. So I think that problem is gonna diminish.

But episode six is the most different. Yeah. And so I just kind of like, was like, I just need to give every thought I'm having. Because some of the times I'm like, I have a thought about this, but it's not, it doesn't really matter. And somebody else is gonna catch this

or it's not worth talking about. And so I, but I was like, I'm gonna dig into this one. So I probably gave you about five more notes than normal. I was fine, I liked the notes. I mean, they all can be addressed perfectly. Did you address all of them? Yes, no, not, to the best of my ability, yeah. I did, of course, I have a lot of notes myself,

so it all comes together. So I'm very excited about that. I feel like I was shot out of a cannon into this space. But I think the thing that really set my day off right, if I'm gonna go back and give you a full update is, first thing I did was I went to the dentist. That's not a good day. It was just a routine cleaning.

It's been six months since my last cleaning. They wanted me to come in six months later. Well, that's typical. Oh, it is? in six months later. Well that's typical. Oh it is? Yeah that didn't mean there's something. I used to go like every year. Every six months is the preferred schedule for cleaning. Well that explains why it hurt so much six months ago

when it had been a couple of years. Right. This time was like so easy. And I was getting praise from everybody. Like your teeth are good. Oh really? Even the wisdom teeth, I don't think we have to pull them. Now if you wanna address the crowding,

I can give you like a orthodontical consult. That dentist, he's a complimenter though. I go to the same dentist. He gave me so much praise about my teeth and I was like dude, you don't, I mean, I haven't been in for a couple years either. Don't deflate my praise. I'm just telling, you just said everybody

was singing praises of your teeth. I'm just saying that I've been to that dentist one time and I noted, I made a mental note, he's really telling me lots of things about my teeth that I know can't be true, because no one's ever said them before. Everything he said about my teeth, I believed could be true.

So, oh, you're doing a real good job, wow. Kinda hurting my. Did he say things like that? You're doing a great job., wow. Kinda hurting my. Did you say things like that? You're doing a great job. I no longer. Looking really good. Thank you, Rhett. I no longer feel like I've been shot out of a cannon. I feel like I crawled out of a, just a pipe,

which I thought was a cannon, but it turns out it was just a drainage pipe. Well, the funny thing is, is I already knew that you went to the dentist because when I got in my car today and I plugged my phone in and my, what do you call it, Apple Car? What is the- Apple Play?

Apple Play, CarPlay, Apple CarPlay. I don't have it, so. So I plugged my phone into my car and then the Apple CarPlay interface comes up along with any places that I need to be and apparently the first place I was supposed to be was Link's dentist appointment. Because we were- Yeah, I put it on your calendar. I was supposed to be was Link's dentist appointment. Because we were-

Yeah, I put it on your calendar. I was hoping, I was looking for you. So when I woke up and got in my car, I was like 12 minutes from your dentist appointment. Traffic was light, I could have made it in time. But I didn't follow the computers. I actually, I navigated to work. Well, hold on, did you just say that when you woke up,

you were 12 minutes away from my dentist appointment? No, I'm saying when I got in my car. Okay. So the first time I really registered anything on my phone was when I got into the car and that was when I found out what time your dentist appointment was, where it was, and how long I had to get to it.

It's on my personal calendar, but there's some weird alert, shared calendar alert thing that's happening. I don't know how I have your calendar on my calendar. I don't add anything to my calendar because I don't use, I don't properly use calendar functions. That's like on Monday, I was like, oh yeah, I went and got a massage yesterday.

Oh, I get your massage appointments all the time. I'm like, that's weird, you know. Not supposed to know when I get a massage. Every time I get one of your massage updates, I'm like, I should schedule a massage. But that would require scheduling. You could just show up five minutes before me and say you're me.

You could've got your teeth cleaned this morning if you were five minutes early. That's true. If you were out of bed. I know everywhere you're gonna be when you're gonna be there. Just show up a little earlier and just get in the chair. The thing I felt besides really boosted psychologically.

What did they give you at the dentist? A cleaning. Oh, they didn't give you any drugs. I sat in the car and I thought to myself, this is the cleanest my teeth will ever be in my life. The way it feels when you put the tongue on My teeth. The back of the teeth.

Will never be as clean as they are right now. And so what? And I just sat in that moment for a second. My teeth will never be as clean as they are right now. And what? And so I'm gonna do something with them? I'm gonna get them dirty? I'm gonna eat a biscuit?

Well, I don't, what do you, how do you apply that? You just want, you were just being in the moment? I was just trying to be. Like a zen thing? Yeah, like a zen thing, like perspective. Like you know what, my moment right now is the cleanest my teeth will ever be and I'm gonna acknowledge that. I don't think the Buddha ever commented on

I'm gonna sit in it. Teeth hygiene though. I don't think the Buddha ever said anything about that. Because you know what, right now, can you say that right now? No, my teeth have been cleaner, definitely. Yeah, and you know what? Way cleaner.

My teeth have been cleaner. This morning. I've eaten a couple of meals. Yeah. It was recent, I can remember it. But it's not right now. I would say. Not this moment.

But your teeth were cleaner at one point. Like when they were first formed. My teeth will never be as clean. As they are right now. Again, as they are. Yeah, that's true, that's still true. Then, no it's no longer true. The moment has passed.

Yeah, it was a moment and you savored it. It was a moment that I savored, alone. It sounds like it was a great time. I'm glad you had it to yourself. And I'm trying to do that because my water dispenser on the front of my fridge is fixed. Because that used to be my moment. When I would push, you know, I talked about it on here,

I'd push the water, I'd push the cup and then the water wouldn't come out and there'd be a delay and that was my moment to take stock of life. Okay, and how long is that moment again? Just a few seconds. But now it's in. It's not enough.

Now it's instantaneous and I'm not even grateful about it. That's my point. Now that the water works perfectly, I gotta find something else. I could say that you might wanna share that moment with somebody though because I feel like if you left the dentist office, especially a dentist that has complimented you so much, even though it's just he does it

with everybody, if you then, if you realize that when you're in the car, just say, you know what, go back into the dentist's office. Just like bust back in? Open the door and say, guys, attention! Hey everybody! My teeth will never be as clean as they are right, what is it saying?

I think that's it, yeah. But they will be though, they'll be clean again. My teeth have never been as clean. No, that's not true. No, it doesn't make sense. What did I say? My teeth are as clean right now as they will be for again. My teeth have never been as clean. No, that's not true. No, it doesn't make sense. What did I say? My teeth are as clean right now as they will be for a couple of weeks.

No. It doesn't have quite the impact. That's not what I said. I said my teeth are as clean right now as they ever will be. That's not what I said. See, it's gone. I can't even say it right.

Yeah, right. When the. See, it's gone, I can't even say it right. Yeah, right. When the moment passes, it's gone. Should've kept it to yourself. Next, six months from now, because I already made my other appointment, you'll get an alert. I'm gonna bust in after I exit and I'm gonna say, guys, and I'll say whatever, I figured it out.

I will listen back to the beginning of this podcast so I'll know what to say. The problem is if you go in and you say that to the dentist, he's gonna make it his slogan. So then you go back to it and he'll have it printed on the window to be, your teeth will never be as clean as they're about to be. And then he's gonna put that on the back of the phone book.

That's a long bumper sticker. But a good one. Your teeth will never be as clean as they're about to be again. Hmm, that's what throws it off. But it's a par- That makes it too long. One word too long. I think the reason why we like it

is because it's a paradox. Your teeth will never be as clean as they're about to be. Well, no, they're about to be that clean. Yeah. So they, yes, they will be that clean. And then when you come in. Right? No, no, this is it. Your teeth will never be as clean as they're about to be. And then on the inside. Well yeah, then they will be that clean. And then when you come in. Right? No, no, this is it.

Your teeth will never be as clean as they're about to be. And then on the inside. Well yeah, then they'll be that clean. On the inside of the dentist office, on the exit door from the office. Yes. That's where it says your teeth will never be as clean as they are right now.

That's what I said. Until you come back, please make an appointment. Unless you come back six. Unless you come back in six months, yeah. I think we should have just been dentists. I wonder if this is all wrong though. If I go. It's definitely wrong. If I go to the dentist again,

if I show up there tomorrow morning, and I say, and they're like, Mr. Neal. We cleaned your teeth yesterday. Why are you back? They were great. They were the cleanest they've ever, they were Neal. We cleaned your teeth yesterday. Yeah, why are you back? And they were great. They were the cleanest they've ever, they were as clean as they will ever be. And we're like, well, maybe not.

So I'm like, I'm back, clean them again. They'd be cleaner than they were today. Will they be cleaner today than they were, yes, I think they would be. They definitely would be. Shoot, this whole thing has been a sham. Exactly. My moment. That's what I was trying to say a couple minutes ago,

but I couldn't quite wrap my mind around it. Again, you've ruined a second moment for me. I'm sorry, man. I'm just dribbling out of. Just don't tell me about your dentist appointments. I'm dribbling out of the drainage pipe of life, thanks to you. I'm gonna give you a second to recover

while I let the people know. Did you know that you could listen to every episode of Ear Biscuits, including this episode of Ear Biscuits on Spotify? Mm-hmm, and there's some people are saying, "'Yeah, because I'm doing it right now." Yeah, that's weird. But maybe you, not you, but you, not the you who is on Spotify,

but the you who's not, is now thinking, "'Huh, I could be listening on Spotify. "'I'll do that next time.'" I was just bringing up the app here. Did you know that there's 2,675,450 ratings for the Spotify app? That's crazy. And what's the rating?

4.7 stars. Well, that's like high. That means that there's a lot of people who do this, so the chances that you're listening or you should be listening are pretty high. We've got Lily here, so we should get her to earn her keep. But Lily, welcome to the Ear Biscuit to really feel the ropes.

Is that what it's called? Nope. To learn the ropes, you gotta promote the sponsor. Yeah. I have every reason to believe that she will get this out much easier than you just got that propped up.

That's a good point. Love this podcast. Well, did you know that you can listen to it on Spotify while still enjoying your favorite tunes? Yes. Should I respond? No. Okay, I won't get in the way. It's easy. Just look for the podcast section within the browse tab on your mobile device

or search for your favorite shows. To find more podcasts, head to Spotify.com slash podcasts. Let me just tell you. And what's your favorite show? What? You're supposed to say Ear B to Spotify.com slash podcasts. Let me just tell you. And watch your favorite show. What? You're supposed to say Ear Biscuits, that's fine. Lily, I listened, I sat here with your father for hours, days upon days, listening to him

try to read our book. He never got through two sentences without screwing something up. That's not true, do you believe that? And you just did that on the first try. I'm proud of you. You take after your mother. And then say, you're supposed to say the URL one more time.

Spotify.com slash podcast. Excellent. Now back to the biscuit. Are you ready to go down the rabbit hole? Here's the envelope. I'm gonna turn it over so we can see the part that we would rip open. I noticed you used a piece of scotch tape.

You didn't use, you didn't lick it. You didn't use your own spit. Thank you for that. I appreciate that, guys. There's a risk associated with this. I'm a little nervous, but to me this represents, I mean, just what we like, which is something new that you go out on a creative limb and you might fall and rack your nads.

The tree limb itself may break and then you may rack your nads. The tree limb itself may break and then you may rack your nads on something else. I thought you were gonna say, this is something that we like talking. And that was gonna be it because that would also be true. The principle of developing a device which then makes us be creative in a new way. It's like, what's gonna happen?

Is this gonna fail? I'm a little concerned about that. Oh, I'm not concerned. Dude, we just talked about your dentist appointment for 20 minutes and came up with two slogans for dentists that would both be great. I'm not nervous at all. He's opening the envelope, listeners,

and he's pulling it out. All right, you're gonna read it and then we're just gonna, we're gonna go. I shouldn't build it up so much. We asked you, what are you thinking about right now? Frank Neves said, I'm thinking about the first guy who ever shaved and how many times did he shave

before the second guy caved? Now here, now you guys pick this. What you probably didn't know. And this is what makes it great. Was this is a lyric, these are our words. We wrote this. This is from the Rhett and Link archive, guys. This is from a song called I Am a Thoughtful Guy.

And I think this was your line in the song, because I don't remember rapping it. I'm thinking about the first guy who ever shaved and how many times did he shave before the second guy caved? I'm pretty sure that was your line. Really? We both think that it was the other guy's line.

Yeah. Which that's something to explore. was the other guy's line. Yeah. Which that's something to explore. We haven't watched this in so long. Now you guys didn't know that. You just thought, you thought that Frank C. Neves came up with like a really good thing that he was thinking right then. Well and that's, you know what?

All he thinks is Rhett and Link lyrics from back in the day. See you guys don't know the archives. Well there's too much to know. And you should. There's too much to know. We don't want you to know it. We don't even know who sang the day. See, you guys don't know the archives. Well, there's too much to know. And you should. There's too much to know. We don't want you to know it. We don't even know who sang the lyrics. I think about the first guy who ever shaved.

And how many times did he shave before the second guy caved? Think about if a friend were choking on ice. Just be patient would be the best advice. Here's what I'll say though. Let's go with this. Yeah, let's go with it because we wrote it as a thoughtful thing to think, but we didn't think about it. But we didn't explore it.

We didn't explore it. We actually didn't think about it. That's the ironic thing about that song is that we actually don't think about any of the things that we wrote in the I Am A Thoughtful Guy song. We just thought this is funny and it will rhyme. Yeah. And it would be that I would like to think about this

but I'm not gonna really think about it because the exercise at hand was to write a song. About things to think about. It wasn't to actually think about, which means that the whole song is a lie. The whole song is full of lies because we're saying, I think about this, I'm a thoughtful guy, when in reality is, I'm just a songwriter, not even thinking about these things.

It's interesting. So let's actually think about it. And I think we should. Before we do, it is interesting that I remember, I'm not trying to take credit for coming up with the concept for this song. Sounds like you might be. But that's a byproduct of what I'm saying

in that I distinctly remember where I was when I thought about writing a song about deep thoughts. Or I don't know if I pitched it as I'm a thoughtful guy. But maybe I did but I remember I was at the Fatburger in Sherman Oaks. Owned by Queen Latifah. She owns that one? I like to think that she does.

I know that she owns one or some, but I don't know that she owns the one. I heard that she owns half of all the ones in LA. So with 50-50 chance that she owns the one in Sherman Oak. I've never seen her there. I've only been there once. Well, I might've been there more than once, but I was there alone, you weren't there.

And I was sitting there eating my- At the Fatburger alone? Yeah, it was depressing. I was in the, you weren't there. And I was sitting there eating my- And the fat burger alone? Yeah, it was depressing. I was in the car too. Gosh. I was in the car eating alone and I was thinking about songs and I, but I don't remember much after that

except how good that burger was. Don't get the turkey burger there though. I'm almost positive I did not write this line. Whether, and I'm pretty positive that you performed it, but I'm also pretty positive that you wrote it. So do you remember writing this line? My memory is not that good. Because I remember how we wrote this song.

We both independently wrote a whole bunch of thoughts that you could think. And then we kind of pitched them to each other and then we organized them and we put it to the song. Then we wrote some together and figured out, oh, there needs to be some shorter ones at the beginning and by the end of the song, there's gonna be some more involved ones.

I remember all that. So I'm putting this on you because I believe firmly that you wrote, you came up with this line. So I think that you were thinking, you thought it up. Why? Why, just put yourself back in that place even though you don't remember writing it. Well, I think maybe an easier exercise

is just to think about, to actually think about the first guy who ever shaves because I had to be thinking about that guy. This is not the type of, this is the type of thing that you would have thought of. You're saying that you didn't, you just thought of it in the context of the song so you didn't actually, you have no further thoughts

besides what we're gonna come up with right now. That's okay. Yeah, I mean, shave rhymes with cave. You know, you just come up with some rhyming pairs and then you're like, oh, the first guy who ever shaved. Oh, and then the second guy caved. I can't explain the process, man. I know that, like, you're talking like

Neanderthals, or is it Neanderthal? Well, I think- Or hairy in the face. Most of the, most scientists say Neanderthals, even though we used to always say Neanderthals. There is an H. Yeah, but you can say whatever you want to, man. They're all dead.

But they have been talking about bringing them back. But their relics of their DNA are within all of us to varying degrees. That is a controversial, the scientific community is currently split on that. There are some people who- 23andMe is it? Yeah, 23andMe takes the side that basically,

you know, and it's fascinating. The book, I've talked about this book multiple times, The Sapiens. I cannot remember the author's name, but Sapiens, New York Times bestseller that basically tells the entire history of humanity. And he talks about all the different people that existed alongside, basically humans,

humanoids and humans, not Homo sapiens, not specifically our species, but the other humans that were sort of branches off of Homo sapiens, you know, basically cousins. And that, you know, we weren't so far separated from them that we had lost the ability to interbreed. So there's some people, and I think, he made it sound like it was like 50-50 right now,

but one side of the coin is we separated and millions of years passed and sort of the populations were isolated and then they came back together and we took them out. But of course in the process- They meaning the Neanderthals. The homo sapiens took out the Neanderthals, but we also, you know, interbred a little bit

enough to get like one to 3% of their DNA into our DNA. And so it varies from person to person. I think I was pretty high. I think I had like a lot of caveman in me. Although the cranial capacity of Neanderthal was either the same or a little bit more. So the whole idea that they were stupider is just something that's like in popular culture.

But there's no reason to believe that they had less intelligence than we did. But then the other camp thinks that didn't happen. We didn't, we wiped them out and we didn't really interbreed with them. Interbreed. But we shaved too. But do they all?

Why are we talking about nanotiles? I'm just talking about, you know, pre-homo sapiens or, homo sapiens before you shave, I mean, cavemen. You think that like homo erectus shaved? The first person to actually shave, I mean. That's a good question. Did, did, did.

That we can't answer but but yeah, first of all, we're assuming that they had hairy faces. I mean, I've seen all the renderings. I guess that's a safe assumption. Well, we still have hairy faces. So they definitely had hairy faces. With anything, we've been getting less hairy. Yeah, yeah.

When you go back six million years to our common ancestor with chimpanzees, of course, at that point, we probably got a lot of hair. And then slowly you lose the body hair for lots of different reasons, but you retain it in a couple of places. And one of the places is on your faces. And then some guy decides.

It's interesting that, before that one guy decides to shave it, that from an evolutionary perspective, that the places where the hair stuck around, I tend to think more about the eyebrows. Like, why is their hair still up here? You know? And I think it's prehistoric sunglasses.

It absorbs light. I think it's prehistoric sunglasses. It absorbs light. It allows you to see easier when it's sunny. It's like why baseball players put black under their eyes. That's part of it, but it's also, so you've got one guy who's got eyebrows and you got another guy who does, this is a vast oversimplification of natural selection when it comes to a trait like this.

But you got one guy. Trying to catch baseballs. And another guy trying to catch baseballs. But the funny thing is is that, so there are multiple processes and I'm not an expert that led to, some of it was climate and that kind of thing, but leading to us shedding the majority of our hair and not needing all the hair.

But then the problem is, is if you go too far, you lose the eyebrow and all of a sudden, you got sweat in your eyes and like you said, you also got sun in your eyes. And so the guy who's got sweat in his eyes and sun in his eyes is less likely to survive and reproduce than the guy who doesn't get sun in your eyes. And so the guy who's got sweat in his eyes and sun in his eyes is less likely to survive and reproduce than the guy who doesn't get sun in his eyes. But they don't, I mean, maybe they mated more in the sun.

Maybe the ladies thought that the eyebrows or the men thought that the ladies eyebrows were more attractive, is that what you're saying? Because that also is a driver of change. It could be, but I'm just saying more attractive, is that what you're saying? Because that also is a driver of change. It could be but I'm just saying more simply, like you gotta, I guess you don't have to see in order to mate, so I'll throw that out. But it helps.

It does help. It helps quite a bit, I would say. For certain parts of it. In those times, back before, I mean, you know, in today's, in modern society, you can have lots of different disabilities and it doesn't affect your ability to reproduce because this is a modern society

and people are supported in all kinds of ways. But you go back to more animalistic times, and I mean, there are still cultures that they've observed, some of these isolated tribes, and this is also in Sapiens, like isolated tribes that are still around, and we can talk to the people who descended from these folks, their parents and grandparents. There are cultures where when somebody gets weak,

like when somebody gets too old, somebody comes up behind you and kills you with a rock. Ooh. Yeah, so there's a culture, I don't know where it is, Amazon Rainforest or something, but there was a dude and he was the designated killer. Rock dropper? And so like typically when an older woman got too slow

and was holding everybody back, he went up behind her and killed her with a rock. And it was just an, and he might do it to his mom, he might do it to his grandma, everybody was related. And it was just this understood thing in the culture. Like, so if that's an indication of what it was like, you know, hundreds of thousands of years ago for all humans, you didn't wanna be somebody,

you didn't wanna be the blind person because you might get a rock on the head and obviously for very good reason and thankfully that kind of stuff doesn't happen anymore. Yeah, that's pretty horrible. So yeah, so I would think that that would have been a disadvantage. To not have eyebrows when mating.

But why did somebody decide to shave? Because first of all, anybody who is in- Well, what I'm saying is that your body, from an evolutionary perspective, decided to shave- No, your body doesn't make any decisions. You know what I'm saying though. The evolutionary process blindly decided

where to shave a lot of our bodies, okay? So like all this hair, well, on my body, like some people have more chest hair than others, like back hair, back hair is more of an anomaly from an evolutionary perspective. But we evolved the ability to still keep hair right here around, just around this part, under the nose, in front of the ears,

and down below the jawline, connecting, if you're a real manly man like me, connecting down below the goozle to the chest hair, which is the superior and upper happy trail, as I like to call it. But what is your point? That evolution stopped there and then man had to make the decision.

Well, before, why did they make the decision? Well, first of all, you don't know, evolution happens, is so slow that you don't know that the evolution of facial hair isn't continuing. We just can't perceive it. Which is why aliens don't have beards. You ever seen an alien with a beard? That's a good point, right?

But we have the distinct advantage, very, very small, very small minority of people who've ever existed on Earth have the ability to know that there was something different before us. So, because you could come to the conclusion that like, this dude somewhere a couple hundred thousand years ago was like, I see the pattern here. I see how it seems like we're progressing towards less hair

so I'm gonna go ahead and do the work that evolution is going to do and shave. No, obviously he didn't do that because he didn't perceive that. We may perceive really hairy people as more caveman-like. Like when you see a really hairy dude at the pool, right? Like a dude with just crazy back hair and he-

Shoulder hair that you could, you could just, you could land in. And you might look at that guy and say, that guy seems more like a caveman and what I imagine a caveman to be, then- We're talking about my dad here, so be gentle. Your dad seems more like a caveman than my dad. That's what we're saying.

And so, but then you would come to the conclusion that that's a negative thing, but that's only coming from a modern scientific perspective. Everybody else who before we had this understanding of our past would see a hairy dude and wouldn't think anything about, well, he's more cave, they didn't know what a caveman was. They didn't understand human progress.

They didn't even understand time in the way that we understand time. So maybe, so, but this dude who decided to shave had to think that the hair was somehow less dignified. And maybe it wasn't comparing himself to previous humans, but it was comparing himself to animals, right? So you look at yourself and of course humans, the natural instinct of every human is to think

that you're special and you're separate from animals. That's why there's so many people who still don't believe in evolution because they choose to believe that how we can't be related to all these animals because we're special, we're different, right? And so that's a totally natural instinct of humans to think. And so-

Side note, I think it is possible to believe that you're special. Indeed, I believe that people are special in terms of conscience, a soul, whatever you wanna call that, but the process, but I don't think, But to be separate. The process of evolution does not negate the specialness of me as a conscious human being.

I think it's a difference between, but I put that more on consciousness than I do on body hair. Well, that's complicated. That's a complicated conversation. But what I will say is that we tend to think of ourselves as we're not animals, right? Even though all evidence points to the fact that we are, we wanna say we're not animals

and we're obviously better than the animals. We're obviously smarter than the animals, right? And we're obviously better than the animals, we're obviously smarter than the animals, right? And we're obviously smarter than that chimpanzee and have no reason to believe that he's a cousin. This I'm just, you know, and so you're like, well, I'm gonna make myself less animal-like. Or maybe. So in that sense, it's just like,

Maybe. So in that sense, it's just like, even if that's, and that could even be subconscious. Like if you're picking up a rock, sharp rock, and shaving your face or, I don't know, was it a knife? Shaving your face for the first time, you don't even know why you're doing it. It's just like, it could be a form of self-expression that deeply rooted is to enhance your separateness

and specialness. That's, I definitely, so even if it's subconscious, I could see it going back to that. I'm taking all this back now though because What do you think it could be? I don't think that the guy was thinking, because people don't do that. People don't zoom out and think about them

compared to the animals. They think about themselves in the context of their local community. So now you're talking about men and women. I think sub, I think it's still on the table if it happens at a subconscious level. Yeah, I don't think anybody's saying,

I'm not a ape. Look at my face, I shaved it. You know, it's something that you just feel. You want to feel different and special, but it might be rooted in something I'm not a ape, look at my face, I shaved it. It's something that you just feel. You wanna feel different and special, but it might be rooted in something to separate yourself and enhance your. No doubt the first dude who shaved

was interpreted as doing something very feminine. That's what I think we're actually talking about. Now you could also say, well, you know, some people have less facial hair than others. Maybe before the first guy with a beard shaved, there was just a guy without a beard naturally. So there's two possible scenarios, multiple scenarios, but one scenario is you got a guy

who just has less facial hair. Like, you know, my father-in- scenarios, multiple scenarios, but one scenario is you got a guy who just has less facial hair. Like, you know, my father-in-law, for instance, he cannot grow a beard. He can't even get close to growing a beard. He can grow like a very, very slight mustache and a very, very slight goatee, but for all intents and purposes. Like some patchy areas. No patches.

He doesn't have anything on the cheeks if he doesn't shave. So you got a guy like that, and let's say that that guy who has less facial hair is for some reason powerful, maybe he's got all the women, maybe he's spreading his seed around, and so now you wanna compete with that guy and you're like, well, I've got a big beard,

maybe the difference is I got this beard, and so then you shave it off. That's one possible scenario, because the other scenario is all the men had beards. Now first of all, I mean again, we're just completely talking out of our butts. We don't know why this happened. But for some reason,

the women lost their facial hair before men. There was a point in which we all had facial hair. But then assuming that the women lost it before men and then all men had beards, then some dude made a decision to become more like a woman, and maybe that was his motivation. Or maybe it was an accident. Did fire come before shaving?

Because shaving involves very specific tools, right? So which came first, fire or tools sharp enough to shave? I'm going with fire, but then if you're saying that somebody got their beard burned off and then it was like, whoa. Maybe you got like a, you know when you're grilling and you singe some, it smells bad, but then you're like, oh.

Grills definitely came before knives. I do know that. Yeah, so you're, okay, but you burn your, dude burns his beard off and then what? He's the leader? He may think. He's a fashion forward kind of guy in the community? I don't know.

I mean, again, it could have been as simple as one powerful woman preferred the guy without the beard. The guy with the beard. The guy with the half burned beard who was like, I gotta make this thing symmetrical, I'm gonna see if I can get the rest of this off. Or maybe there was somebody who had to get into something, like slip into something and they needed to, I don't know, there's all- Yeah, face first.

Maybe there was a functional reason, like some guy needed to like, maybe, oh, you know, maybe there's a guy that was a functional reason, like some guy needed to like, maybe, oh, you know, maybe it's, there's a guy that was a designated like, guy that like stuck his face into a beehive or something, like of course that guy wouldn't need a beard. There's gotta be a functional reason why you wouldn't need a beard. You know, I think you're good at coming up with things

you don't actually believe. You're doing a good job. I'm just wondering if there's a, like when you talk about people who like genetically, they just, they don't grow full beards. I think at first they would grow less beards and it would become patchy. It wouldn't just be all of a sudden.

Yeah, it's gradual. Yeah, so at some point when it's gradual, it becomes patchy to the point where it becomes more embarrassing than desirable. So you're like, I'm taking. The drastic measure. I'm taking this drastic measure of like, I'm shaving the patches off.

I'd rather have nothing than have a half beard. All my boys are grunting and making fun of me. I hear their grunts right now. Those are divisive grunts, you know? So I'm just gonna take it all the way. And then something cool happened to that person. Maybe they also, they were cool for other reasons. So it became, you know, culturally, it just became something.

Because it's complete, because obviously the ability and desire to shave is not, that's not in your DNA. That's not something that's passed down in your DNA. That's cultural, right? Yeah. So it's not like, oh, the guy who shaved had more kids and so his kids shaved too.

I mean, that's not how it works. Yeah, it's all about- You have to infiltrate the culture. Yeah, it's all about, it's all about. You have to infiltrate the culture. Yeah, it's all about fashion. I mean, sexuality, fashion, power. But here's the thing. I think your thing about power is pretty, like it being associated with a powerful person

or a powerful person making a choice. To influence culture. Yeah. But I think we maybe, we're thinking about, you know, you're talking about divisive grunts. I think we're thinking about it, it's too prehistoric. This is probably- It's much more recent. We're talking like the Romans were the first people

to shave or something? I mean, the Roman Empire was several hundred years BC, definitely, right, when it got started. So I'm saying the historical, historical humanity, like recorded history. Yeah. So like post stone age, not prehistoric, but historic, that my guess is that the first person who shaved

was in historic times, which makes me think that we could have just Wikipedia'd this. I think at some point, we're gonna have to crack open the internet in this. I think we have to do that in this podcast. We can't sit here and blow smoke for, you know, tens and tens of minutes. Like the history of shaving?

And then just leave it. I think we've got, we can't leave this open-ended. People are already cracking open the internet or they're frustrated if we're not gonna give a definitive answer at the end of this. I think we need to find that answer by the end of this conversation. There's an interesting, this is an interesting.

But I think we need to agree before we crack open the internet. Okay. I think you and I have to be like, this is what we believe it is. But an interesting thing that you have broached here, and that is the purpose of conversation. This is something I've been thinking about a lot.

I've actually been thinking about this in the context of. So if you're expanding the conversation, do you agree that we are going to. I'm coming back to that. We're gonna find the internet's answer. And I will come back to that. To who's the first person who ever shaved. So hang on, but yeah, go with this.

This is, if the rabbit hole can go anywhere and come back to that. I'm still in the hole. I'm not leaving the hole. Oh, we're still in the hole. In talking about, so, you know, one of the things that we're doing for the Tour of Mythicality for the show

is we're bringing different parts of the book to life. That's sort of the backbone of the show. And you know that there is a chapter written from the future in the book. We literally had ourselves from the year 2075 write an entire chapter of the book of mythicality, it's fascinating, we can't tell you how it was done,

but it's absolutely fascinating. It wasn't legal. No, bro, many different international and. It wasn't legal then, but it's not illegal now. Galactic laws. It's legal now, because there's no law now yet. But we're bringing that potentially, that section of the book to life.

And one of the things I talk about And one of the things I talk about, one of the things we talked about in the chapter that I was trying to find a way for us to talk about it in the show today is the idea of time passing and information processing, even as it relates to entertainment. So let me explain what I'm saying. With Good Mythical Morning, you sit down

and you enjoy Good Mythical Morning or Ear Biscuit or any form of entertainment, doesn't have to just be something that we make, for an amount of time. You set aside time, and of course, if you're listening to a podcast or an Audible book or something like that, you might up the time, 1.25, 1.5, whatever, how fast you wanna move it,

but there's a limit to how quickly your brain can process information. And if you were a computer, if you were a perfectly functioning computer, you don't have to take time to tell a computer a story. You can take a file that has a story on it and put it into a computer and the computer immediately processes it

and is familiar with it in all the ways that it needs to be familiar with. So in other words, It has it. It either has it or it doesn't have it. We're recording this podcast right now and it's making a file that the computer is immediately, the computer doesn't see it as something that has a beginning and ending,

it just sees it as digital information that it could access at any time. It has it or it doesn't experience it. Right. Over the course of time. And what's happening with artificial intelligence is really interesting because we are headed lightning fast to some sort of intelligence that will immediately,

as soon as there is something that can be as intelligent as a human, emotionally, it will be infinitely more intelligent already from a mathematical standpoint, because your phone is way smarter than us mathematically already. Sure. Right?

So assuming there's gonna be, and then there's probably gonna be a time in which we're able to figure out how to have an interface between our brains and a computer. And we're gonna, in the same way that right now our lives are sort of supported and propped up by these memory devices, like the reason that I knew you were going to the dentist

and you knew you were going to the dentist wasn't because you remembered, but because it was on your phone, for all intents and purposes. But if you expand that. Because my phone knew it, it had it. If you expand that out and you say, well this phone is now attached to my head,

it's inside my skull, now entertainment becomes something that you can simply download. So you become like a character in a role-playing video game that can walk into like a shop and buy an experience. The ability to wield a sword instantly. And it might be like, and it's not just abilities, can walk into like a shop and buy the ability to wield a sword instantly.

And it might be like, and it's not just abilities, abilities is, that's a really interesting conversation, but I'm specifically talking about experiences. So it might be like, I wanna know what it's like to climb Mount Everest. I wanna know what it's like to have Kobe beef. I wanna know what it's like to have that. So in that case, you would be implanted

with the data of a memory. So then you would say, You could be implanted with the- Have you ever climbed Mount Everest? And you'd be like, yes, it was amazing. And you could talk about it extensively, as well as even better than if you actually experienced it and then remembered it because of the faults

associated with memory. Right, so it raises the question, so about the book, we talk about how the future of Good Mythical Morning is that it will not be enjoyed as a linear experience over time, it will be enjoyed as data that is simply injected into your brain. That's the future of Good Mythical Morning, that's the future of entertainment.

Sounds depressing, doesn't it? But as it relates to this conversation, this is really interesting, because you're saying, here we are, two guys who don't really know what they're talking about, but like to talk, and can talk about the first guy that ever shaved, and you're talking about saying,

well listen, we could just go to the internet and get the definitive answer. Maybe we can, maybe we can't, we don't know. They probably don't know, but we could get the best answers from the best people. But then we wouldn't have had this conversation. So the question is, is there, is being implanted with the experience

the same as the experience? If you perceive it in exactly the same way, in one second after you get back home from Everest, you feel exactly the same way as the guy who didn't go and simply had it implanted in his brain. So you both feel and perceive exactly the same thing about your trip to Everest. Absolutely not, that's not the same thing.

It's not the same thing, but. You would believe, you would believe you've done it, except you knew that technology existed, that it's possible that you didn't climb Mount Everest, you just believe it with your whole heart and mind that you did. You can control that part of the technology. You can say part of the- Flag this one.

As this, I will think that I did this one. Like this is not one that will be implanted in my brain that I know definitively that I didn't do. I want you to convince me that I did this. So for the rest of your life- Do you know how they would do that? They would do it by tapping into the part, they would subvert that part of your brain,

the neurons that are associated with pathological lying. And I'm not comfortable with that. Like the people who can lie, they lie things they believe. I don't wanna alter my brain in that way. And I think that's how science would do it. Oh, well, they'll have a way, they'll have a way to do it, man.

It's lying to yourself. Yeah. And then what is your reality? Because you could be like, I mean, the most immediate application for this technology is trauma, is people who've been affected by horrible experiences. People have been abused and been through horrible experiences

who developed some sort of Stockholm syndrome or whatever. Well, I think that's a noble twisting of neurons. Right, and so in those cases, you could say, we don't want to add experiences, but we want to subtract experiences. But once you figure out how to do that, then you're like, well, why aren't we gonna add experiences? But I don't wanna get into that,

it's a whole different conversation. But I think my thing is, is I do value the conversation that we're having. Yeah, because I think if your question, getting back to this is, would you just like to know the answer? And is it, what's more valuable? Knowing the answer, who was the first guy who ever shaved?

And maybe why? Or all the details that the internet would offer, or would you rather have the experience of listening to two idiots trying to seem really smart, but potentially being totally off base for an hour? Well, we are comedians. We are. Let us not forget that. And I hope that's very valuable,

but instinctively, I felt like it wasn't valuable enough. So I was like, we gotta put this thing on the end. So I kinda, I presented the conundrum here, which it's a hard question to answer. You're talking about short circuiting. If you had to choose one or the other. But you can also have both. We're gonna give both.

We're gonna find out the answer here in just a few minutes. Because that is. But if we didn't, this will be a very frustrating podcast and that was my concern and why we said we need to come up with an answer. Is that, does that give us an answer to your larger question of would you rather know something and believe you experienced it or never know it?

If it was a lie, would you rather download the experience of Everest but never actually go? Or either go or don't go? Would you stay old school? Would you take the pill, the climbing Everest pill? Well, first of all, there are people who think differently about, there's people who are very scared of technology

and putting anything into their body. You know, there was that company that everybody, I think they were in Sweden, maybe it was America, maybe it's, I know it's happened in Europe, but there was that one company where they lined up and they gave people the little chip in between their thumb and their index finger. Oh yeah? And it was,

you know, according to the company, in about 50%, it was optional and they paid for it, but it was like 50% of the employees signed up for it. And it was basically their security clearance to get into the building was built into their thumb. Okay, so basically just a key, something as simple as a. But. That's a big choice for just the convenience

of not having to lose your keys. I don't know if I would get an implant just to get into my work without my badge. But obviously this is just step one of many, right? Because at some point we're gonna be like, well why can't we also have my social security number and my personal information and my medical records on me at all times?

So there are people for good reason, let me just be one of the first people to say, there's very good reason to be very cautious about that kind of thing. You know, lots of people from particular backgrounds and particular understandings are like, oh, this is the mark of the beast that is foretold in the book of Revelation

and that's what these people are getting themselves into. This is a real bad thing. And even people who don't think that and just think, just believe that you should have some sort of privacy and the government should know all this stuff. There's good reasons to be scared of the technology. I, on the other hand, I'm like, I feel like this is all inevitable

and we're gonna have to just move forward with the technological advances and be very cautious as we embrace them, but realize that ultimately there is, you can't hold back this flood that's going to happen with us becoming one with machines. I don't think you can actually hold it back. And while you were talking, I concluded,

I will take the climbing Everest pill. Right, which is, yeah. And then at first I'll say, with the flag on it, on the file, that I know that I really didn't do it. Oh, so you can be like, experience it, but then. Yeah, I don't like the idea of like lying to myself. I'm not comfortable with believing like a pathological liar or worse.

Because at that point you. Or like lying to myself. I don't think that's healthy. But I think I might be comfortable with, like I'm sitting in a chair and I'm like you know what? I took that pill two years ago. I'm gonna relive climbing Everest right now in my own mind, like a prisoner would do in like a cell

who like thinks about when he used to walk on the outside. And then you can delete it too. Maybe it's a free trial. Maybe there's like a seven day free trial for the Everest thing and then you just do it for seven days and then you forget about it. Just zoning out, just thinking about, man, it's like once I got up there, it was tough.

I had to really alter my breathing because I ran out of the oxygen. Because I think what you're talking about is if you can't separate yourself, whatever it is that yourself is, from the memory that's been implanted, then who are you, right? Because then at that point,

you can just give me a completely new identity and I could be a different self, which is the whole crazy thing that, you know, you talk about like traveling across the universe. Well, we're always going to be able to send information much faster than physical matter, right? We're always gonna be able to send information faster than matter, because matter's gotta get up to,

you know, there's all kinds of limitations with propelling matter across the universe, but information moves pretty fast. And when that information becomes yourself, then you can put yourself, you can travel in space. So at that point, if we find a way to represent the self as a collection of digital information, which obviously we're getting into lots of philosophical questions about is that all you are?

Let's just say for this argument, it is all you are, and you can be implanted in a cyborg that never gets old and you can just change yourself out. Oh, I broke my arm, I'll just put a new arm on. And so now you are this self. Yeah, you show up in, I wanna show up in Sweden right now. You shoot yourself to a different cyborg. Or Mars.

Or any place else. And ultimately, if there are aliens, and statistically speaking, there probably are, it'd be very difficult to believe that there aren't. Beardless, by the way. They're definitely beardless. I don't think that they've come to visit us yet. But when they do come and visit us,

if they come and visit us, it will be in that fashion. It will be, it won't be. Through the internet. It won't be beardless beings showing up on spaceships. It will be suddenly you'll look down and there will be matter assembling itself next to you into a being that has found a way to shoot information across the universe and take the matter from your planet

and assemble itself into a coherent being. That's how they're gonna come. I don't think that will happen. I think they'll have to be a conduit. So there'll be shells, there'll be avatar shells, like physical shell people. Well, that's the movie where they shot, they basically planted themselves.

They have to have containers. Deeply planted themselves. They have to have containers. Deeply in the earth. They have to have bodies. If you can get. You can't send it through, you can't email it through the internet. But what's that matter forming? If you can get to a place where you can.

Matter cannot be created or destroyed. What I'm saying is that if you are technologically sophisticated enough to send matter across the universe. Data, not matter. No, matter, because you're talking about physical things being planted. Yeah, yeah. So if you're-

The shell, they ship the shell. Exactly. If you're technologically sophisticated enough to send matter, whether that's shells or ships or seeds, across the universe to another planet, you already have gotten to a place where you're technologically sophisticated enough to send data that can have information that then assembles the matter that you have access to a place where you're technologically sophisticated enough to send data that can have information

that then assembles the matter that you have access to on the planet. Oh, you're saying that the data pulls resources from the soil. It doesn't create or it like attaches to the side of a skyscraper and then like pulls bricks off the side. Okay, yeah, I believe in that. The data, yeah.

The data, my whole point is that, no one's done this. I thought you were saying matter from nothing. I don't read a lot of science fiction. But you know there's stories about it. But I don't, somebody needs to make a movie about this. If not somebody, we will. Somebody's gotta make a movie about that's how the aliens get here.

For you sci-fi fans who've read a lot more than I have, you gotta tell me that somebody's thought of this, that that's how the aliens get here. For you sci-fi fans who've read a lot more than I have, you gotta tell me that somebody's thought of this, that that's how the aliens come. They come as information that assembles itself using the atoms in our Earth. But we're not gonna answer that here. No, because we gotta get back to the first guy who shaved. But before we do, would you take

the Climbing Mount Everest memory pill? Yes. Without a flag? Without a flag, definitely. I'm the guy who's first in line to embrace all the weird stuff. Would, do you think, I would think I would take it with a flag because I don't think it, again, I've already told you why.

No, but here's the difference. I don't wanna fool myself. As two different guys though, if you have the flag and I don't have the flag, when we sit down and talk about Everest, you're like, yeah, but I didn't really do it. But I'm like, but I did really do it. I'm sorry.

I got a better story because I really did it. And you can be like, no, you forgot. You had the memory implanted without the flag. I had the flag. And now we're just in an argument about who's got the flag. I'm like, no, I don't have the flag. Constantly. You're like, you didn't get the flag implanted

because that's part of the package. I'm like, don't ruin it for me. I loved Everest. Right. I lost this finger. Oh, it's back. Right, and then see how that ruins our friendship? Yeah. You see what you've done to us? I think what this means is that friends

have to do things together exactly the same way. Like we both have to go to Everest. Take the flag or don't take the flag. With or without the flag. We gotta make a decision or else you just lose friends. I really think you'll be, even with the flag, I honestly think you will be a better person. I think it can make you a better person to experience,

I mean think, if you climb Mount Everest, doesn't that make you a better person? It impacts your life. Yeah, it just makes you better, period. If I see a guy that went to the top of Mount Everest, he's better than me. It's like watching a movie. You can watch movies that make you better as a person,

and you can watch movies that, I guess, make you worse as a person. Oh yeah, anything Tarantino does. The other day I was sitting in my- Tarantino was in the office. Where, where- In our office? No, not ours, but where I'm supervising the post on Buddy System. You're kidding.

He was, yeah, the editor said I went to the bathroom. No, no, you're kidding. And he said- QT was in the building on Buddy System. You're kidding. He was, yeah, the editor said, I went to the bathroom. No, no, you're kidding. And he said. QT was in a building with you? He said, he comes back and he's like, I was just in the bathroom with Quentin Tarantino. Quentin Tarantino does post at the same facility we do? Yeah, we do.

Yeah, we do. We do. I picture him doing it in a theater at his house in the hills. He came to this place and he was at a urinal and he said it was really weird because he had both hands above his head against the wall. Of course that's how he does this.

And he was like, he was leaning into the urinal. That's how I'm gonna do it for now on too. No bend in the elbows, hands outstretched, splattered against, You know why he does that? Splat against the wall. So we'll talk about it later. I don't, yeah.

Scott said, I was like, that's Quentin Tarantino. I can't bring myself to say anything to him because of his posture at this urinal. You don't talk to Quentin Tarantino when he's pissing. No. You don't talk to him anyway Tarantino when he's pissing. No. You don't talk to him anyway. But definitely not in the middle of that. And he said, and plus he looked really disheveled. What, when does he not?

He's supervising the extended cut of Django Unchained, which is gonna be released on Netflix. What? Who would've thought that there's, isn't the extended, isn't the director's cut what Quentin Tarantino puts out period? Like Quentin Tarantino puts out whatever he wants. Not in the days of Netflix when you get that

little extra scratch on the side. But now he has an even, a director-director cut. He's thinking about all that money he's making as he just pees all of the liquids out. He's got his hallelujah hands up. He's peeing into that urinal, man. So an even longer Django Unchained is coming away. That's the hot news that I got for you.

You can't put the flag on. Well, by the way, that was a memory that was implanted. What if this whole thing is a pill that we've taken? Well, let's not even get into the fact that it's almost a certainty that we are living in a simulation already. I haven't seen him, I'll let you know if I see him.

So you take it with the flag or you take it without the flag? With the flag, yes. But you're saying I gotta have the flag if I'm gonna do it as well. Yeah, so it's like watching a movie, but it's a movie that's my memory and it has to feel different because it's a memory trip.

I'm taking a memory trip. Isn't that a Merle Haggard lyric? Take his memory trips and fight the pain. Yeah, because he's talking about he's a prisoner of war. Yeah, that's all you got when you're in prison, taking memory trips and fight the pain. Yeah, because he's talking about, he's a prisoner of war. Yeah, that's all you got when you're in prison. When you're in prison are your memory trips. And think about, I mean, there's no doubt. We could sell this technology to prisoners.

Well, there's absolutely no doubt that when this is figured out, if we don't annihilate ourselves before we get to this point technologically, which is, I'd say it's more likely that we annihilate ourselves as a species before we get- Technologically or environmentally or?

Yeah, yeah, we got all kinds, there's like 15 different ways that we could, everything could be blown up in the next 100 years. But let's just say we get lucky and we make it through against all odds. Well, there's no doubt that this technology is going to happen. And I was listening to something on a podcast the other day

and they were talking about how, if you were to bring somebody before the technological revolution to the current day, they would not be able to process anything that they were seeing, couldn't even begin to process it. And to think about, because of the principle of accelerated change that things continue to change more quickly as they change, there's no doubt

that there's gonna be a time that if we were to travel to the year 2075, or let's just say 30, you know, 2175, whatever, we would encounter something that we couldn't even process. And so we're processing this stuff right now. We're talking about implanted memories and trips to Everest and that kind of thing. But to think about the technological advances will be things that we can't even,

couldn't process or have conversations about right now that will be more advanced than the things that we're talking about. Because surely the things we're talking about are gonna come to pass, because they're just precursors to the crazy things that will come after. Yeah. So this is all,

you may think we're just nuts, right? This stuff is gonna happen, guys. We're gonna be faced with these questions. You're gonna be able to look at a library and hit a button and get all the information. And it won't be an actual library. Those won't exist, but a library of information. But there'll be like a hipster retro,

what's it called, skin. Yeah. There'll be like a hipster library skin you can put on it. And it will be. What you're choosing from. It will be, most likely, based on how much money you have. That will be how you get the information.

You know, unless somebody decides that. That's fine. Everyone's. The ultra rich can become self deluged and then it'll be up to us to finally take control. Oh, okay. You're gonna be part of the revolution, huh? Yeah.

Instead of the bourgeoisie? Yeah. I think I wanna be a Instead of the bourgeoisie? Yeah. I think I wanna be a part of the bourgeoisie. So. Just sitting up there thinking I'm on top of Everest with a Mai Tai in my hand. Who was the first guy, that'll be a frozen Mai Tai. Well it's alcoholic drink, it won't freeze.

That's the beauty of what you said, huh? What is a Mai Tai? Oh no, where's the rabbit hole going? So the first guy who ever shaved. You guys have laptops, can we borrow one? And have you been looking this up or have you been doing your own internet? Cody was ready, he's got Google up.

So first of all, I'm just saying. Jacob, you go. The first guy. Back up Google this stuff, see if you can find something else. Cody, I'm having trouble. First guy who ever shaved has a parental warning. You don't wanna see that?

You don't wanna see anything shaved? Give us the password. We're gonna ruin your internet history here. All right, so literally just type in who is, no, type in the question. I just wanna see if we say the first guy who ever shaved and just see if our song comes up. Oh, the history of shaving.

ModernGent.com. And then under that, we got the Guardian. When and why did men start shaving off their beards? Let's just go with the first hit. Yeah, the history of shaving. Now this is not like a, this does not look like a pro site. This is like a white site with this black text on it

and like a very boring sidebar menu and where one of the items is ask the barber. Egyptians shaved their beards and heads, which was a custom adopted by Greeks and Romans 330 BC. Shaving predates history, but it was early Egyptian men and women who really established shaving and hair removal as a regular part of daily grooming. Hold on, hold on.

I said we were gonna agree before we started looking into this and then we got this laptop and we didn't agree. We got so over freaking zealous that we didn't land. No. But neither one of us said Egyptians, so we're both wrong. No, what I said was, I said it was after history,

so that's different than this. I've already been proven wrong. But we didn't land on it. Because it says it predates history. I landed on after history, that's what I was thinking. But I wanted us to agree because I was about to talk about the Egyptians. Well, let me implant that in your brain.

Right, as I was saying, I believe it started with the Egyptians. That's what it's gonna be like in the future, man. If you're having a, if your two guys are having an argument and whoever gets to the implant faster is the one who wins the argument, you know? It's just like, I want this guy to agree with me,

and then you say his little code and he agrees with you. So you, that's wrong because in the age of Google in your pocket or in your glasses, it would eradicate all arguments. But that's the sad thing about humanity. I wanna talk, that's another rabbit hole because I have a whole like theory about using artificial intelligence and letting them rule us.

I actually have a theory about why that would ultimately be better. But people are gonna hate me because of it. I'm just saying, why can't arguments, the reason why Google doesn't solve arguments is because arguments aren't about being right or wrong, they're about other things. But you can program artificial intelligence

to only be concerned with truth and then let them lead. But that's a whole different podcast. Keep reading this crappy website. Men scraped their hair away in early times. In early times, man with crude items such as stone, flint, clam shells and other sharpened materials, he later experimented with bronze, copper and iron razors. How do they know this?

They don't. Keep reading. Why though? Why? Why, when and how people started shaving? Read that. Okay. Out loud. Being so clean all the time

was associated with fanatical behavior by outsiders. The ancient Romans thought that a lack of major body hair was some kind of terrible deformity, but not in Egypt, where priests believed that body hair was shameful and unclean. Okay. Religious belief of uncleanliness.

That makes sense. Wild animals and barbarians had hair. That's what I said about wild animals. Not the sophisticated and advanced Egyptian civilization. Being hairless was achieved by shaving, using debilatory creams and rubbing one's hair off with a pumice stone. Ooh, gosh. That sounds fun.

Yeah, click on the Guardian article. Yeah, now we're resorting to the Guardian for truth. I don't know if that's a good idea or not. I don't know much about the Guardian. Oh goodness, okay. An analysis of fashion pictures shows that beardlessness began among young men in the 1890s. Oh, give me a freaking break.

You're going back to 1890s? I just went on ancestry.com the other night and took my own family back to the 1700s. What is this? Hold on, are you reading comments or an article? That was Dave Noll from Claremont, California. Dave, your whole comment is Noll because you just said it begins in the 1890s.

You're not reading an article, you're reading a forum that's titled The Body Beautiful. Here's Nora from Chapel Hill. The ancient Romans also shaved their beards. Well, I don't know much about fashion. These people are just, these people are worse than us. Click out of this. The Guardian just gets a bunch of numbskulls

to come in and just say what they think. That's what this whole podcast is, is two numbskulls saying what they think. We need definitive information. Shaving Wikipedia, that's what I said about an hour ago. Shaving is the removal of hair. Oh, now we're onto it. Now we get to the good stuff. Shaving is the removal of hair. Oh, now we're onto it. Now we get to the good stuff.

Shaving is the removal of hair, finally. Shaving in history. Before the advent of razors, hair was- Put this where I can read it silently while you read it out loud. Before the advent of razors, hair was sometimes removed using two shells to pull the hair out.

Ooh, plucked. Or using water and a sharp tool. Around 3000 BC, when copper tools were developed, copper razors were invented. Okay, so they probably found copper razors. The idea of an aesthetic approach to personal hygiene may have begun at this time, though Egyptian priests may have practiced something similar to this earlier.

Yeah, because ancient Egypt goes way back. Aesthetic approach to personal hygiene, that's two things, that's fashion, aesthetic, and personal hygiene, which is plainly used. You get stuff in your beard, you know. Alexander the Great strongly promoted shaving during his reign in the fourth century BC because he believed it looked tidier.

In some Native American tribes, at the time of contact with British colonists, it was customary for men and women to remove all bodily hair using these methods. So okay, all right. When was that? The earliest that we're hearing right now, so okay, all right. When was that, what's the earliest that we're hearing right now, 3000 BC, no?

3000 BC copper tools. Yeah, 3000 BC, but I think the point is is if there was a custom that the colonists ran into with the Native Americans, I mean Native Americans, it's controversial how long they've been here, but maybe as much as 40,000 years, probably more like 20,000 years they've been in North America. So you have to assume that that custom originated

way before we just showed up. So it's probably one of those things of this thing happening simultaneously in cultures because it can be done, it will be done, right? Yep, because you can do something to your body to express yourself and maybe it's associated with a belief of hygiene or spirituality, religion.

I think the bottom line is it happened because it could happen, right? That's as simple as that. Like you've got something on you that can be taken off. Well, okay, let's try that. Yeah, it's no- Enough people live, things happen. It's really no different than saying

why do people configure their hair in different styles? Yeah, we could ask that question about ourselves. Right. I still don't have an answer. Yeah, we do. We got a whole chapter in the book about it. Yeah, we wrote about it in the book. Yeah.

Well, that wasn't the earth-shattering, groundbreaking answer that we were hoping for, it's just pretty simple. It's like, if it can be altered on the human body, as soon as you can think about it, it's gonna happen. Would you like a more fantastical explanation? I think we've given those, but the one with the guy grilling is what I'm going with.

I'll give my alternative explanation, and that is that an ancient alien species that was technologically sophisticated enough to transmit data that had the ability to control matter. And also had evolved to the point that all of their hair was gone, which is clearly the path that we're all on. No, no, it was much simpler than that.

They were just practical jokers. Oh. And they sent themselves to Earth because they're so technologically advanced they just do things for kicks now. They sent one of their dudes to assemble himself as some weird dirt man, you know, hundreds of thousands of years ago

and he came out and he like made this motion like, shave. But he was clean shaven. Yeah, well, I don't know his methods. I know how he got there. He didn't have a beard. He did something to encourage the first person to shave and that's why people shave. That's my alternate theory.

And you know why he did it? For kicks. Because someone, right, for kicks, because someone in that alien race that just needs to do stuff for kicks had to go do a new thing for kicks in order to create the data that could then be instantaneously passed along

to everyone else of his or her race so that they could say, you never guessed what I did yesterday. And they were like, let me experience it. I traveled to a planet, I got off, I assembled myself and I made like a shaving motion. It was hilarious. They've probably been shaving for thousands

of years there now. And then like now, whenever we go back, I bet you those fools will be shaving. Yeah, right. Yeah, I did that. No, you didn't. You didn't put the flag on. That was the expansion pack.

That's what's happening. Oh, all that comes back. We're gonna stay in this rabbit hole forever. Wow, we're never gonna get out of this. That was just one question. If you liked this, we'll do this again. I enjoyed going down the rabbit hole. And if you hated it, let us know as well.

Some of you probably did. But we still love you. We'll talk at you next week. Yes.