Ear Biscuits with Rhett & Link - 133: Solving Your Strange Job Problems (Fan Questions)| Ear Biscuits Ep. 133

Episode Date: March 5, 2018

Learn to work that alter ego when faced with a boss who can't remember your name. R&L give valuable advice to the Mythical Beasts' work issues ranging from constantly singing coworkers to chronically whistling noses and more on this episode of Ear Biscuits. Listen to Ear Biscuits at:  Apple Podcasts: applepodcasts.com/earbiscuits Spotify: spoti.fi/2oIaAwp Art19: art19.com/shows/ear-biscuits SoundCloud: @earbiscuits Follow This Is Mythical: Facebook: facebook.com/ThisIsMythical Instagram: instagram.com/Mythical Twitter: twitter.com/Mythical Other Mythical Channels: Good Mythical Morning: www.youtube.com/user/rhettandlink2 Good Mythical MORE: youtube.com/user/rhettandlink3 Rhett & Link: youtube.com/rhettandlink Credits: Hosted By: Rhett & Link Executive Producer: Stevie Wynne Levine Managing Producer: Jacob Moncrief Technical Director & Editor: Kiko Suura Graphics: Matthew Dwyer Set Design/Construction: Cassie Cobb Content Manager: Becca Canote Logo Design: Carra Sykes To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This, this, this, this is Mythical. Welcome to Ear Biscuits, I'm Rhett. And I'm Link. This week at the round table of dim lighting, we are helping you guys out in the business sector. Oh, well, that's such an over promise. We should have talked about how we were going to platform this.

Can I, I mean, I think the honest answer is we asked you to ask us questions about work. In the workplace situations that we can help breathe our perspective where otherwise it may not need to be wedged. And we shouldn't promise that we're going to help because I kind of feel like. Because then when we do help, we'll seem awesome.

I, well yeah, under promise and over deliver, but that's not even what I mean. What I'm saying is that. That's marriage, not work. It's like a doctor giving, it's like a non-doctor giving medical advice. I think that we should always premise every single question and answer episode

with we are not experts. Do not take any of our advice, what is it, how do you say this? What is like the correct like legal way to say this? No horses were harmed in the making of this Ear Biscuit. That's definitely true. No animals, period, I don't think. Well there might be an insect under my foot right now.

Oh gosh, why'd you have to make me think about that? Who knows? You're not really the type to hedge. No, no, I feel like we've been hedging. Do you know that we're, My voice is also getting raspy. Are we gonna go somewhere with these workplace situations and you're hedging because we're gonna be

wedging ourselves in and it may not turn out well if people follow our advice? I'm just saying that, I don't know what advice I'm giving, by the way. If we try to platform ourselves as a bastion as of advice, then people may be disappointed because we're not, you remember Dr. Ruth?

You don't have to convince me. Well, I'm generally aware, but I don't know what happened to her. Nothing happened to her. I'm just saying we're not her. Oh, remember, let us forget the, lest we forget the lessons of Dr. Ruth, you know what happened to her.

She was also giving sex advice, which we haven't done yet. I'm not saying we're not going to at some point, but. That's a category. That's, I mean, I don't know, maybe 2027, okay? 2027. So the category was just workplace situations. We got some really good questions.

Let me tell you right now, you guys, we didn't even give you that much time to respond to this question. And if you want, I mean, again. But there's so many good questions. But if you're not following us on Twitter and Facebook, that's where we're putting this stuff out. So if you wanna be part of the responding to prompts,

then keep an eye out over there. Rhett and Link on Facebook and on Twitter. That's where we're doing it, right? We're Rhett and Link on Facebook and on Twitter. That's where we're doing it, right? We're Rhett and Link everywhere nowadays. We're also mythical in places for different types of stuff. But that's different, that's about the mythical vibe. Right. Let's go with this one from Kyle first off,

just because it's on the first page. I have a coworker who sits next to me and sings to himself at a moderate volume nearly all day. He only sings the catchiest things that get stuck into your head and it drives me mad. Stuck in your head is what, I don't want to make Kyle sound like a moron. Oh yeah, I didn't put a two in there.

Example, everything is awesome. So Kyle's over there working and then he's got a, he's got a coworker sitting next to him and he's like, everything is awesome. This is maddening. Everything is going on. Oh gosh. So this person sits next to you, Kyle.

And man, this is almost unbelievable that this is happening and you say it's moderate, a moderate volume, a few key details. That's what, is it everything is awesome when you're living in your jeans? I can't remember. Yep, I think actually something about dreams. You're fly fishing streams.

Moderate volume, nearly all day. Now first of all, this seems kinda crazy, but it's totally believable, because when you, if you're really susceptible to airworms, everybody's susceptible, but if you're really susceptible, and even people who aren't like particularly weak for them, sometimes you just find yourself singing it. Like last night at the dinner table with my family,

right before dinner, Lincoln had his laptop up and for some reason, he pulled up. Hold on, your kids have the laptop at the dinner table? No, before we go to the table, we're like the kitchen counter and he pulls up, he thought it'd be funny, he pulls up the most annoying YouTube videos and starts playing them like the Apple Pen, pineapple pen.

Oh, he's still on that. He like pulled that back out of the vault. And then there's this other song that they are obsessed with and it's, hey, you got any grapes? Da da da da da. He goes up to a lemonade stand and keeps, it's a duck that keeps waddling up to a lemonade stand and keeps, it's a duck that keeps waddling up to a lemonade stand

and ordering grapes and it goes on for way too long. It's an animated. Do ducks like grapes? Because grapes will kill a dog. I'm so dad right now. I don't understand it, I'm so annoyed by it. But then we get to the dinner table and we're having a legitimate conversation as a family

and then every few minutes, one of the kids starts singing it. You got any grapes? Doesn't even sound like a song to me. I can look at their face and tell that they didn't even... Oh crap! Oh! Okay, are we burning? We got water, get the water up.

What? The water! We're gonna catch fire in here! But don't block the shots, guys. This is the best thing that's ever happened to Ear Biscuits. For those of you who are just listening and not watching. Are we still rolling, Kiko? That's the most important thing. So. I'm gonna get a towel.

So the main thing that you need to know if you're only listening to this is the sun fell from the sky, the dim lighting has become really bright because the, the lighting fell right in the middle of the table, knocked over Rhett's ear biscuit jar onto his phone, which is kinda wet, but it's okay. My water's fine.

This is Kiko, that was Jacob. They're trying to clean up and make sure that this place doesn't short out and just burn down. But somebody's gotta man the helm. Everything is awesome. Everything is cool when you're part of a team. Everything is awesome. You're livin' in your jeans. Oh God.

So. Speaking of jeans, my freakin' jeans are wet. Yours. I can't wait to watch it back. Like, I don't know if the shock on our faces was covered by the fact that the big ball came down right in front of us. It could've been the end, guys.

I mean, don't, listen, the worst is over, guys. Don't panic. It's cool. Everything is awesome. Okay, we're back. We got the light back up so we're getting back in here. I'm still wet. And you know what?

I have a little more information now. A duck walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, hey, bum bum bum, got any grapes? Oh, I've heard this. Well, I'm such an ignorant internetainer, and you guys are probably screaming this if you know it. It's the duck song from it.

From old. March 23rd, 2009. You know how many views this thing has? Let me guess, the duck song, 2009. 274 million views. That's a crazy guess, and you're still low. 318,000, 18 million views. 318,000, hey for a blind guess, that's not bad.

I can't even see that as 318 million, it's so crazy. I got a million thumbs up. 318 million views, there's a sequel too. Yeah, for another time. So my kids, just to finish that little anecdote that left us way on the sidelines. It's my fault. As I was talking to Christy and the kids,

if it wasn't one, it was another one who was singing the song and I would look at them and I could tell by the look on their face, they didn't know they were singing the duck song. It was just an ear worm. So your brain just starts playing it in your head. I can totally relate. But what do you do about it?

Because even today, Kyle. We had a song, you'll find out on GMM later, but we had a song that was in our heads all day that we were randomly singing. I think I have a solution to this. Now you could do the direct approach, but the direct honest approach to say, hey man, you're annoying me with your music.

Don't do that, that's no fun. I don't think it will work, by the way. Well, here's what I would do. Okay. You be the guy that's singing the song to himself. Okay, go through the chorus a couple times and I'll tell you what I would do. Running to the man, running to the stand,

hey, boom, boom, boom, got any grapes? No, no, no, no, sing Everything is Awesome. Why? Sing a song I know because it makes, you'll find out in a second. Oh. You have to sing the chorus of Everything is Awesome. Everything is awesome.

Everything is cool when you're falling asleep. Everything is awesome when you're living in my dreams. Everything is awesome. Everything is cool when you're not on a team. Everything is awesome. And then I'm looking at you like, what happened to you, brother? Every time the guy starts singing,

sing louder than him in a slightly different key. And he will stop. That's tough. He will stop. I guarantee you, you will embarrass yourself. You will lose friends, but you will gain your sanity back. Try it three times. Well you don't want him to be your friend. You're saying you'll lose him

as a friend or you'll lose other friends? You may lose other friends because they'll be like, why is this doofus singing Everything is Awesome off key right now? It doesn't matter, it's worth it. You will get your sanity back. And lock eyes with the guy when you're doing it? Yeah, if it's a cubicle situation,

you peek over the top, everything is awesome! Slur your words a little bit. Everything is good when you're born and maintained. He will stop, he will never do it again. That's the solution to that, Kyle, try it, and then report back. The most surprising part about that was how easily you sang off key.

That's not an easy thing to do on purpose. I'm like a wolf that howls. Before you ask another question, let's take a short break. Yeah, we need one. We just took a long break trying to fix his light. Well, I mean, let's take a short break. Yeah, we need one. Not to- We just took a long break trying to fix his light. Well, I mean, it's not really a break. It's a break to let you know about something that you can add to your life.

Ear Biscuits is supported by Mattress Firm. Now, today we're talking all about work, trying to give you some advice about that, but you know what? If you wanna go to work and you wanna do a good job at work, you wanna be spry and you wanna do a good job at work, you wanna be spry. You wanna work it. You got to get a good night's sleep.

You gotta take advantage of this time that you've got in your bed, in your bed, on your what, on your what, on your what? On your mattress and everything else around it. Mattress Firm, America's neighborhood mattress store, lets your budget stretch further when you're looking for ways to improve your sleep. Now they're more than just mattress experts,

they have the whole package to help you transform your mattress into a bed from adjustable bases and sheets to headboards and bedroom decor. They've got you covered. So we are saying go to mattressfirm.com slash podcast. That's where you can find out what deals they've got happening right now. Mattressfirm.com slash podcast. That's where you can find out what deals they've got happening right now. Mattressfirm.com slash podcast.

They even offer you a 120 night sleep trial to ensure perfection and a 120 night low price guarantee so you know you paid the perfect price. That is mattressfirm.com slash podcast to learn how your sleeping could be monumentally improved. Ear Biscuits is also supported by Hello Fresh. Now I like to consider myself a creative person who likes to spread my wings and try new things,

but honestly, cooking has always intimidated me, but you know, I'm getting closer to it thanks to Hello Fresh. They give you all the instructions, all the ingredients to simply make something perfectly and say, you know what, this is it, family, we're gonna enjoy it. My family, I think, is the same way as me. Sometimes, you know, we don't like to try new things

unless we have a game plan. So HelloFresh is very empowering when it comes to making a meal because the game plan and everything you need to execute it is right there. It is super convenient. You choose your delivery day for when it works best for your schedule.

You can pause your account for weeks at a time when you're out of town. It's super simple like Link was saying. You're not gonna spend all night in the kitchen because recipes only take about 30 minutes. Everything is planned out. You just, if you can read and you can move your hands, you can make an incredible meal with HelloFresh.

Yeah, and we wanna encourage you to try it out. So you're gonna get $30 off your first week of HelloFresh. Just go to HelloFresh.com and be sure to enter code Ear30, that's E-A-R-3-0. HelloFresh.com, enter code Ear30 to get $30 off your first week. And now on with the biscuit. Here's another question. Hannah, this is a doozy.

There are four, you know what? I didn't wanna, I'm not gonna say her last name. We're gonna beep that. Did we say Kyle's last name? No. Because we said we wouldn't say the last name. You did what you give me a hard time about doing all the time, which is.

I said don't say their full name and then I said it. You told me three times. Yeah, I should have told myself. Well I marked it out. I should have done that. Hannah blank. There are four student workers in my office. Hannah, myself, Olivia, Katrina, and Melissa.

Our boss refers to us as Heather, Hannah, Christina, and Melanie, respectively. We've corrected her many times that she is not calling any of us by the proper names, but she has yet to change to using our real names. How do we get our real names back? Now, asterisks on Hannah, and that is, when she uses Hannah, despite being my name,

she is always asking for Olivia. Hannah never actually refers to me. So she's got one name out of four right, but is referring to the wrong person. So she's got four names wrong. I had to draw a little diagram to understand this. So the boss calls Hannah Heather. The boss calls Olivia Hannah.

The boss calls Katrina Christina. Okay, that one's the only one that makes sense so far. And the boss calls Melissa Melanie. And she's been corrected. But many times. Many times? Yeah. And she keeps been corrected. But many times. Many times? Yeah. And she keeps going back.

Well this is just a, this is a power bit, I think. Oh, hold on, but as someone who gets people's names wrong all the time. Yeah, it's a power play for me. You're, oh! It's not a power play. You, but you don't do. You think I'm stupid.

No, no, you don't do this. I'm'm stupid. No, no, you don't do this. I'm in charge. No, no, you don't do this. Well, we'll say today. Have we talked about this? No, it just happened. What do you mean have we talked about it? No, no, no, the Johnny Jotty thing?

No, no. We haven't talked about it? I thought we talked about it in a Good Mythical More. And we just talked about it with a person an hour ago. Okay, well, we met somebody the other day and they said they introduced themselves as Johnny and it was, to me, it was relatively clear they said Johnny and Link said back to the guy,

Jotty? You made up a name that doesn't exist. And then, and then. I thought he said Johnny. And it was really funny to me. And then an hour ago, well, two hours ago, we met a guy named Chris. He introduced himself as Chris and and Link said, Cruz?

So he automatically assumes these names that are like very unique. But the two most common names on Earth, Johnny and Chris, you assume were Jotty and Cruz, which is similar but different. But as soon as you were corrected, you stopped. You didn't keep doing it. Yeah, I'm not a jerk.

So this has been pointed out. I don't think. To this person. This is. It's weird, I mean, it is a working theory. It could be a power play. That the boss could be throwing the power around here. It's like, I know that's your name, but it's like, to me it's akin to the power play when you call some,

you give somebody a nickname. Like unless you're like a recreation grade school soccer coach, you just can't go around giving people nicknames. I would've thought you would be a nicknamer. And I think I've been very tempted by it and I searched my own heart and I realized that it's, it's like looking down my nose at somebody.

Like who am I, I don't have the right to change somebody's name or to decide how it's pronounced or anything like that. I do agree that in those instances, like when you give somebody like a pet name or a nickname, that's a power play. It's a power thing. So I don't know if that's happening here.

These are more alter egos. This is getting somebody's name wrong. And to me, if you've tried to correct her multiple times, You're saying if we believe the best about the boss. If we believe the best about the boss, which we will choose to do, we'll choose to be mythical and do that. Nice.

I think that this is an opportunity for alter egos. You guys, you may be Hannah, Olivia, Katrina, and Melissa at home, but at work, you're Heather, Hannah, Christina, and Melanie. You're super. You're super workers. It's like super alter egos you guys can, I would do, I would, you know.

Be different. Be left-handed at work. Can you do that? Especially if it involves a lot of handwriting. Can you be other-handed? Or like, I don't know, anything that involves like a lot of dexterity. Just be a different person.

Wouldn't you love to say, well I'm Link at home, but I'm Charles at work. I mean, wouldn't you love to be able to do that Link at home, but I'm Charles at work. I mean, wouldn't you love to be able to do that? I think this is an opportunity for somebody. It would be, it opens up a world of possibility. It's kinda like when you go to a new school and you're like, I can be somebody new. When you move, a lot of kids do that when they move.

Or it's like when Peter Dinklage, he used to be called Chip, your neighbor. And he was called Chip, and then one day he shows up at school and he's like, call me Peter. And we all did. We all did. It took a while for me. Yeah, because you had grown up calling him Chip

and then you had to call, so okay, so you know what? Hannah, you need to stop, you need to see this as a blessing, you need to see this as an opportunity. I love that. That's clear, though. It's confusing because one of your friends is known as you. And I was talking to Olivia just then, by the way.

Right, that's the confusing part. Now we've got two questions that I think can be addressed together, although having read them, I do believe that, at least in my opinion, there's a different tack for each one of these. You wanna read them, I do believe that, at least in my opinion, there's a different tack for each one of these. You wanna read them both though? Sure, James.

Yeah, he thought I was gonna say something else after his, but James, that just is his name, says, my office mate often comes back from lunch and has eaten so aggressively that she has to use a flosser to dislodge the whole chicken she has just eaten. A flosser? Yeah. Is that a job description?

Right, I believe this is a utensil. Unless this is a place where they have a flosser. Makes me wanna clean my teeth right now, I'm like searching. Then spends 20 minutes sucking said bird carcass parts out of her teeth, what do I do? And let's couple this with a question from Melissa. OMG, I have a coworker across from me

who eats unshelled sunflower seeds all day. Crunch, snap, spit, crunch, snap, spit, all day. What are they spitting if they're already unshelled? I think, well, my unshelled, like they haven't been, had the shell removed yet. Oh, oh, oh. I think that's the use of that term in this context. All day, then add tap, tap, tap of the paper cup

he spits the seeds into. So we've got two annoying office mates. Got a coworker who sits across and an office mate. Well, the first person, James, who has to endure the sucking of the bird carcass for 20 minutes, at least you don't have to endure the tap, tap, tapping that Melissa has to endure all day. So James, we're just trying to put yours in perspective.

And you can leave for that window of time. You have pinpointed the problem, that was exactly what I was thinking. Oh yeah? I was thinking that for the flosser, you take a walk. This is your break time. When she comes back and she breaks out the floss, that is your cue for a short break.

20 minutes. 20 minutes, a 20 minute walk around the building, take an important phone call. This is an opportunity. Now, Melissa on the other hand. I like you turning these into opportunities. Melissa on the other hand, this is an incessant crunch, snap, spit,

crunch, snap, spit all day. And my advice here, and I don't know if it's possible, I don't know if I would be capable of this, but I believe you have to learn to love it. No. Yep. I disagree. But I think it can be done. I think you can learn to love something.

How? I think the power of your mind. There are people who have done deep meditative practices and they have taken even pains that their body is experiencing and they found a way to focus in on them and actually to begin to gain pleasure from them. And I don't think I could do it,

but I read a book where somebody did it and I'm thinking that maybe Melissa can take a chance and see if she can learn to love snaps, what? Spit, crunch, snap, spit, crunch, snap, spit, whatever it is. Take a chance on loving. But what do you think? Spit, snap, spit, crunch, snap, spit, whatever it is. Take a chance on loving. But what do you think? Spit, snap, spit.

You don't think it can be learned to be loved? I don't know, you kinda guilted me into agreeing with you because it seemed so metaphysically higher plane. You gonna tell the guy don't eat the thing you love? I think, again, in the spirit of believing the best about someone, you gotta make sure that you don't build up so much animosity that it explodes in other ways at work. Like, you don't wanna be a pressure cooker

towards your office mate who, again, believing the best in this instance would be, you know, he doesn't know it. He doesn't know that he's tapping, he doesn't know that this is audible to anybody else, or she, I don't know if they mentioned that. No, it's a man. He spits the seeds in too. But then, I don't know, I do think this is delicately

and almost apologetically approach and say, I know how much you love sunflower seeds, trust me. But. Oh, this is the opening salvo? I just wanted to say, it penetrates my ear hole so hard. Don't use those words. Maybe rephrase, I wouldn't say penetrate or hole.

I didn't mean. You can think about it ahead of time. I rephrase, I wouldn't say penetrate or hold. I didn't mean. You can think about it ahead of time. I agree with you, Rhett. Let's move on. Dang it, I don't know. Kate. We're trying to find ways not to be so confrontational. Is that ultimately?

Even while being confrontational, I think that's something you would have to talk about. An office mate, that implies, I picture two people in one office. So this is like an arranged marriage. Like I had an office mate, and I just, I had to become friends with him. I haven't. You learned to love him.

I learned to love him, but also learned to be honest about the things that weren't working. Because you know what, it goes both ways. And you're opening a door and that could be part of it. Opening salvo is I know how much you love sunflower seeds, trust me, but it makes it difficult for me to concentrate, do my job, et cetera, et cetera. How honest he could work.

And then by the end you're saying, and I'm sure there's things that I do that might make it difficult for you to do your job and I wanna open the door for you to tell me those things. It's a safe place. What if you started with that? What if you said, hey, Darrell, whatever his name is, is there anything about me that annoys you?

Like what if you started with that question? Okay, let's go with that. Okay. And then Darrell's like, no. You're great. And then what? And then I think he would naturally say, well, is there anything about me?

Well, I'm glad you asked. No, but let's say, yeah. But let's say that doesn't happen. So let's go through it. Then you love it. Start over. Hey, Darrell, something I've been meaning to ask you. You know, we're office mates.

Yeah. And we share this space. Yeah. Sometimes when people share a space with each other, there's little quirks and stuff that can get on each other's nerves and I'm trying to be more conscious of that. So serious question, is there anything about me

that annoys you? No. And that's it, no. That's the end of the conversation? Okay, cool. Well, I'm gonna learn to love the fact that you annoy me with your sunflower seed spitting. Yeah, I mean it's like you gotta.

It's an internal conversation, you wouldn't say that out loud. You can't trap somebody, but then you can. I think there's a good way to do that. I think, you know, you'll figure it out, Melissa. Kate, sorry, we couldn't be more helpful. Kate asks, how do you deal with a ravenous coworker who snoops around after everyone has left

and steals everyone's snacks and candy from all of the cubicles? This is serious. Hashtag Ear Biscuit. Now, if you're not familiar with cubicle culture, as I am, this may come as a surprise to you that many cube dwellers have a little stash of candy or treats that they put in a bowl, like a dish,

like that you would normally see on like a great-grandparents coffee table. Yeah. So that it's a really smart thing because when someone comes to your cube to have like a work conversation, they get a little reward. It's Pavlovian. Pavlovian. It's like, oh, whenever I go see Daryl,

you know, I get a few sunflower seeds. That's not the best treat though. You want something individually wrapped. One of those strawberries that has the gushy strawberry center. That's wrapped and looks like a strawberry. Yes. I gotta unwrap this thing.

You would never buy that, but somehow someone has it. Tina has had them, they're from 1984. Have you ever seen one of those? Have you ever seen- In a store? No. For purchase? No. I don't believe they're available for purchase. They're just, and I've eaten them.

Whenever I'm presented with one, I will eat it. Anytime a candy is wrapped like of the fruit that it represents, I eat it. I've never said no to that. Can't think of another example, but I agree with you. Yeah. And so that's a good idea. That's just unsolicited advice for cubicle dwellers.

Treats, have treats. Somebody's going around and stealing them. And first of all, this would just be something cool to catch on camera. Yeah, this is definitely a hidden camera situation. But then if you're gonna set up the hidden camera to catch them, you might as well go one step further and plant a little naughty-naughty.

Oh, you're saying poison them? I know that's not what I was thinking. But yeah, that is what it sounded like. I meant like a spicy strawberry candy wrapped. Don't poison them. Do not. Again, all of our advice is to be taken with a grain of salt.

Next time this falls, it's gonna hit me. And I was just asking the question. I wasn't suggesting that you should poison them. I was saying. A hot treat. A hot treat. Take the strawberry, unwrap it. Nasty. I was saying inject something nasty.

A turd? Is that going too far? Or spicy. You could die eating a turd. But then they're gonna leave, but then at least you'll know, you kinda wanna, when you play a prank on somebody, you wanna be able to see them eat it.

I don't think that when she's stealing it, she's eating it right there like a squirrel. You gotta put cameras in everybody's cubicle. You're like, hold on, this is all worth it. Hey, no, after night one when they steal the good candy, you know who it is. Night two, you put the camera. How about putting a tracker on the candy?

So you swallow the tracker? You know wherever she's going at all times? Then what happens is you follow the tracker on your computer to a certain address and then you look up that address and you tie it to the coworker and you know who it is. I'm second guessing the whole hidden camera thing in general because I think you might get fired for that.

There's like a privacy breach in that. Well I think seriously. Maybe like one of those hunter motion operated cameras that just takes a photo of the candy. Like a cougar? Yeah just set that up so you get the cougar. That might not get you by it. This is taking too many resources and too much time

to set up trackers and put turds in there. That's what people in cubicles live for, man. Oh, you're right. You know, I'm sitting in my cubicle back at IBM days and I'm just looking for something to live and breathe for. Well, I think you can start a movement though. If this is something, I mean. I wanna catch, maybe a snare.

It feels like the context here is that this person is stealing everyone's snacks and candy. So if Kate knows that this person is stealing everyone's snacks and candy, that means that there has been talking amongst multiple people. You've got the beginnings of a movement here. Well first of all, at this. An uprising.

If it's everybody's candy, then it's easy to find out who did it. It's the one cubicle that still has candy. They're probably stealing, they probably don't have, these people don't- Eating their own candy? They don't have their own candy. They wouldn't be stealing. I think that this might be a mass email,

like a company email situation. This may graduate to that, because it's technically theft. You know, to whom it may concern who is stealing all of our candy. Who is this? This seems passive aggressive, if it's coming from the boss or an employee.

Employee is passive aggressive. And overreaching. I think it comes from a movement. I think it says from. Oh, so like a list serve. It's a petition, everyone signs it. We are a part of the candy union. It's we, the candy union, all believe and agree

that it is wrong and morally apprehensible to sneak around. Apprehensible? And steal, yeah, it makes me nervous. Steal my candies, steal all our candies. So something, I think there's some good advice in there somewhere. What kind of world are we living in that you gotta lock up your candy

every night? Right, now here's a question from someone. I am going to say his last name because I love the way his last name sounds and we've said it before. Nat Pua, Pua, Pua. Pua asked another question and Nat, we're not always going to answer your questions just because your last name is Pua, but you had a good one. I know you've discussed it in the Book of Mythicality,

which I own and love. Hot tip, if you want a question read on Ear Biscuits, include a plug for our merch within the question. Pua knows all. But how do you know when it's time to leave the nine to five job to pursue that something else that you're also passionate about? This is a good question.

And one I think a lot of people are probably wondering about. I know many of you right now are listening to this while in the midst of doing something that you'd rather not be doing. It doesn't connect with the deepest, most inner you. It may not utilize your highest and most refined skills and it may not reflect where you wanna go in life. But first, let us say that we are here for you.

We're glad to be a part of taking the edge off a sharp environment that you find yourself in and you may not be able to make a responsible decision to get out of at this point. That was like my, that was my, Comforting voice? Like comforting, kind of pick you up. And it's not gonna change overnight,

but maybe the advice we're about to give can help you in the long run. I have some thoughts. You wanna, I mean, you wanna go first? Or, I mean, go ahead. I'll just skip to it. I think anything, as you start to pinpoint where your passions lie, find ways to invest

some time and energy and resources, that may be money, into developing that skill, or gaining experience there, or just starting to channel your passion into something outside of work hours. I mean, so it's gonna require some sacrifice. I think you gotta, it may not be, it most likely will not be responsible for you just to quit your nine to five

and then try to start something up. You know, we were very practical and we can get into that, but I think that's where my advice is gonna land and we can go into some of our experience if you want to. Well I was gonna basically say the same thing. That you find a way. You don't quit, you don't jump ship when you don't have another ship to jump into.

I think you've got to build a framework that there is a practical. Maybe build a rowboat, let's go with the analogy. And a responsible, yeah a rowboat or a lifeboat of some kind so that you, and obviously it depends on what circumstance of life you're in. If you're married with children, if you're the breadwinner of the home or whatever,

which was the case with us, you have a special responsibility to your family and so you can't just jump ship and be like, I'm going to find myself and find what I'm passionate about and then meanwhile you're all going to starve. You don't wanna do anything like that. If you're single and you can support yourself and you don't have a lot of expenses,

you could possibly quit, but I think that having something that you've actually invested your time into and there's some sort of practical path towards a career. So speaking from our own experience, before we were doing what we do now, we would get together once a week at night to do comedy. And sometimes that was writing a song. But we were constantly working on

just what we were passionate about. We had no idea that it would ever be a career. We had no idea that we would ever, that things would get to this point. There was no career path, but there was just this very, very small seed of an idea that we just put ourselves into. We scheduled this regular thing once a week, and that became the seed that grew into what this has become

just because we just said, all right, we don't wanna stop doing this steady job, but we want to try something else, at least a little bit. Think you gotta at least have that. Yeah, I mean, anything, if your passions aren't being employed by your employer, then you gotta, I mean, you should, if you're passionate enough about it, you're gonna be willing to sacrifice some of your,

some of your extra time to invest in that on the side. And if you're also good at it and opportunity aligns, then I think you'll be ready to jump at something, you know, when there's more of an opportunity or when that rowboat gets built and it's got some oars and you have a destination you can start paddling towards. You complete the analogy. Paige asks, I work in retail and am always bored.

Any tips to pass the time? Now Paige isn't saying that she wants to jump ship and get out of retail. Maybe there's opportunity in retail and maybe it's just where she's at for the time being that it gets boring at times. I've walked into retail situations and I, boy, I don't even, I'm just there as a customer

and it drains me. I like, I leave as floppy as a Ziploc bag full of water. You know how sometimes you'll have a Ziploc bag full of ice and it melts and it's like, man, there's nothing more flaccid than a Ziploc bag full of water. Gosh, you have to use that word. That's how I leave clothing stores. Like if I never went in another one in my life,

it's like from the moment, I could be the most vital human and it's just like, it just sucks the turgidness right out of me. Oh gosh. It's just so draining. I can't imagine working there. Well, you haven't helped Paige. I just was, I mean, sorry.

Sorry, Paige. You really, really got, you've laid the groundwork for a great answer here. Yeah. I'm just feeling her pain. Sometimes that's all you need, someone to give you a verbal hug. Just to be sympathetic.

First of all, neither of us have any retail experience. This is not a job that we ever did. I don't think that either of us would have been good at it. But I think you've got to get somewhat creative. I don't know what kind of retail you're in, but. Because you'll never, yeah, because you have to stay engaged and do good at the job so that you can move beyond it. But if this festers, then you're gonna get fired

and it's not gonna lead to any other opportunities. So I see where you're going with this. Something that's like. Well, and something related to the job. Keeps you going. What I don't think you can do, which I think a lot of people do, is if you get disengaged with your job

and you replace it with engagement in something that is tertiary, that isn't related to your job, you're on your way out. So in other words, if you do what I did in the waning years of my engineering career and you just go online and learn about ultralight airplanes and crow hunting and et cetera.

You're not long for this engineering world. And so that means don't just consume yourself with social media or just gossiping about other coworkers or just wasting time, wasting the company's time. I'm not saying you're doing that, Paige. I'm just saying that that can be a temptation in an environment like that. Making paper airplanes with the printer paper?

Yeah, I think you gotta do things. Perfecting your design and throwing them. Exactly, I think we're talking things like, let's just say you work in a clothing store. Retail? Retail clothing. Oh, I thought retail was clothing. Yeah, it could be like, you know,

it could be like. Convenience store? Pottery barn too. That would be retail, wouldn't it? Sure. But probably clothing? That drains me too. So yeah, anything that drains me, I think that's what I call retail.

The only non-clothing retail I could think of was pottery barn. Like I dug so deep and that's what happened. Pottery barn. I haven't been in a pottery barn in and that's what happened, Pottery Barn. I haven't been in a Pottery Barn in a long time. Sure it's great. Now, the like folding T-shirts, I'm thinking about this because I was recently

in a retail store and I saw a girl using the T-shirt folder. It's like a flat plastic thing. And now she was using the T-shirt folder. I was like, that's neat. And yeah, it'd be neat for a little bit. But she was like, I'm gonna do a new way to fold the T-shirt. I'm going to perfect the one handed thing.

And then you start doing it and you get really good at the one handed T-shirt folding. And next thing you know, you've got a crowd. Ooh, it's like busking. Next thing you know, you got people showing up. Watch the one arm. Well, she's got a crowd. Ooh, it's like busking. Next thing you know, you got people showing up. Watch the one-armed, well, no one. She's got two arms. Watch the two-armed girl fold the T-shirts with one arm.

And next thing you know, you got a line of people who, they're coming, they're. I waited in this line, I finally get up here and she's got two arms? I've heard wrong. And she's folding, and then you get when you can do two. Look, she's folding two t-shirts. XS, XS, extra small on this hand,

and extra large on this hand. And I don't know how she does it, and next thing you know, people are buying t-shirts left and right, you're working your way up to manager. The shirt says, this shirt was folded by the one-armed t-shirt folder. And then one day. No, one day.

And then it was smaller. It says, and unfolded by me. Yeah, yeah, and then one day, you're sitting in the top of the skyscraper with your glass office looking out over the New York City skyline because you are the CEO of this place. And you have.

The what? CEO. And you have a little plaque over there. It's out of tune, the wolf is back. And people, and they reminisce. The people reminisce and they're like, you see her, you see her, she's on the top of this company, she's the top of the world, you know how she started?

Let me tell you a little story about folding t-shirts with one hand. That's how legends get started, Paige. I would recommend just hiding in the middle of the clothing rack, just jumping out and scaring people. That's a shortcut. That could also work, you could work your way up to the top doing that.

Nat Pua. Just say his name in between. Every once in a while, yeah. Lucy, I work at an elementary school. How do I get my fifth graders to think I'm cool? This is easy, Lucy. Fridays are GMM day. Cody asks, what do when a crappy coworker gets more recognition

than you, the one who really deserves it? Oh, Cody. Cody's got strong opinions about himself. He left out the word you too. What do, what? What do, what do I do? What to do. What to do when a crappy coworker gets more recognition

than you, the one who really deserves it. Cody, I would challenge you here, if you believe that you are less crappy of a worker than the more recognized coworker, I don't know your situation. You could be right, but I would challenge you to just try to put an objective lens on the situation and look inward. Maybe there is something that's crappier about your work

than you know about. Ooh. Or maybe there's an aspect, maybe there's another criteria that you are not using to judge your work or your crappy co-workers work that someone else, like your boss, is seeing. That could, that may very well be. I think a lot of us have a tendency to get bitter

with other people being recognized or being compared to people or just not seeing in someone else what someone else does and it's because you have a limited criteria of what success is and for example, someone and I think this could be me in many instances, looks at on, like results, efficiency, results, quality, measurable things, and could compare myself to someone else

and say the numbers don't lie. I am outperforming this person, but there could very well be, it could very well be that that other person is more likable. Uh-oh. The intangibles. I'm just giving an example.

I think it's, never underestimate the power of being likable. You could say it's being nice or that it's being, you know, when you work with people, be somebody worth working with. And you know, I think you could, that could slip into being like some sort of political, I'm going to, I'm gonna make, I'm gonna make somebody believe,

I'm gonna butt kiss or I'm gonna make somebody believe I'm great or I think they're great and start playing games. I'm not suggesting that but I'm just saying, as one example and it could be anything that you're, it could be different things that you're missing. As one of them, never underestimate being a coworker worth working for or working with. Or, you know what I'm saying?

Well, yes, I do. And I would say that as a boss, as bosses, I would say that in the instances in the past years of being a boss, when we evaluated someone's performance, you've sort of got two things, right? You've got your performance and then you've got those intangible things.

You're calling it likability and I think it would be. Again, I'm just giving that as one example. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think there's other things. But in likability. That think it would be. Well, again, I'm just giving that as one example. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think there's other things. But in likability. That are not as measurable. And likability doesn't mean it's like, oh, he's cool or whatever.

It also means like plays well with others, works well, has a positive attitude. Yeah. There's lots of things that contribute to it and I would definitely say that our evaluation of people's performance has often been influenced by, well, you know, so and so is struggling in this role,

but man, he's got a great attitude. He really brings a great, his attitude sort of lights up the room. He's great to work with. Thank you. Yeah, I'm talking about Link. He's really suffering and is struggling in his role here as co-host, but he's a real likable guy.

Yeah, yeah. We keep him around. But when you've got the, but nine times out of 10 or 10 times out of 10, if someone is struggling in their performance and they also happen to be difficult to work with or it's just something else that just makes them not likable, that is something that they do have control over,

then it makes it very difficult for us to have a positive evaluation of them. Well and, but to get back to what Cody's saying because that may not be the case with you, Cody, I do think, to echo the last thing you were saying, we're encouraging you to focus on the things that you can control and you can't control how another coworker is perceived.

If you try, that could be very dangerous. Could be sabotaged. Yeah, you don't wanna get into that game. So focus on yourself and how, and you know what, maybe you wanna ask for feedback from your superior without drawing a direct comparison to anyone else when you go to that person. Just asking for, excuse me, asking for honest feedback.

Yeah, and I wouldn't mention anybody else's name. No. Catherine asks, what do you do when a coworker thinks they're hilarious but they aren't? It seems so bad not to laugh at all, but their humor is that bad. Ooh, this is tough. Yeah, when somebody thinks they're funny

and it's like, you know, maybe you like them as a person, they're honestly trying. Man, there was a guy back in the IBM days. We called him Baron, the Baron. Was that his name? It was his last name. He would come around and he always was yucking it up with the jokes and they were always like painfully,

they were just cringey. Really? And it was the type of thing that like, he would put you on the spot. I wish, I mean it was so many years ago, I don't have an example, but it was, he kinda had this Michael Scott from The Office, that was his name, right?

Yeah. Kind of vibe that's like, he's zero self-awareness. And it's not like he'd be telling a joke to a group. He'd be telling a joke to you and he's looking right at you and it's like now it's time for you to laugh and you're like, ha, courtesy laugh. And that just stokes the fire.

Oh, the courtesy laugh. But it's cold-hearted to just stare right into his soul and just be flat-faced. But you know, you're pretty good at that. Because a lot of people might think that I would be the one that would do the stone face and you do the courtesy lap, but you know just as well as I do.

Yeah, I can be cold. That you can be, I've seen this in my 30 plus years of friendship with you. Yeah. That you have a tendency when somebody does that and maybe you didn't do it at IBM, but many times, me and you have been talking to someone and they've said something that's not funny,

and I look at you and I can tell he's not going to respond to this, and you're stone-faced. And I'm like, if I do this, this is gonna get so awkward, so I'm just like, ha ha ha ha. And you know why? I do a courtesy laugh. I've gotten in such a habit of doing courtesy laugh because I'm a people pleaser.

Yeah. But also because I'm always with you and I know you're not gonna do it. And I have to do it. You gotta double up. And that's good on you because I'm not proud of, I think the reason why I'm stone faced is because I'm more concerned about what other people

observing this think about me than I am about what he thinks about me. Because if I laugh, if I don't laugh, it's like, oh, he might think I'm a jerk. But if I do laugh, everyone else thinks I'm a chump who has no real sense of humor. Dang, Link actually thinks that guy's funny. But you also know I'm gonna laugh.

If it's just us. I think if I wasn't there, you'd probably laugh. Well that's why I keep you around. If the courtesy laugh fell back on you, you'd probably do it. Even though your performance is par or subpar, I keep you around. I'm so likable.

For that reason, because you're very, well I need you in that sense. But the question is how do I get somebody to stop? Here's what I think. I think you gotta do the stone face. No, I think there's, this is what I think it is. I think there's a way to graciously say something like this. Here's an example, I don't know what you would call it,

but it's like Barron, man, you have a refined sense of humor. It's like Baron, man, you have a refined sense of humor. You know, it's just kind of like, that sounded a little sarcastic, but I didn't mean it that way. It's more like trying to find the beauty in the fact that this guy, his sense of humor is not funny. You mean to say something as opposed to laugh? Say something to him, just kind of like call him out

on the fact that like, I didn't find that funny, but I really enjoy the fact that you said it anyway. Yeah, but what if that leads to him doing more? I'm not getting anywhere. Well, I don't know, I'm not trying to, I'm gonna give similar advice. I guess my, I have had experience with this guy that like once he knew that I didn't, I still really liked him.

Nothing I just said, I sounded like a jerk. But I don't know how, but I did succeed with Barron. He knew that I didn't think he was that funny. Oh, so it worked. But I thought that he was funny because he always tried to be funny. So we were friends. I was like, I love you man, but I don't get your jokes.

Oh so you actually said that? Yeah, eventually. Well that worked. Because typically. If it worked for you, this could be what. Typically the type of people that do that, they're like, there's a sweetness to them that they're likable people in general.

It's not like the boss in office space. Right. That guy deserves no mercy. So if they're like Barron, this guy who's like super sweet guy who just doesn't, he just can't for the life of him make a funny joke but he can't for the life of him stop trying, you gotta love him for it.

Yeah, well I don't have any advice here because I don't think I would be able to apply my advice. Because. Stone faced? I would, yeah, I'm a courtesy laugher. You're always gonna get a laugh from me, although you can probably tell that it's fake. Definitely.

Spicy. 110, no name, that's just it, Spicy 110. Suggestions on separating home and work when you work at home and don't have the space for physical separation. Now one of the things that we've always said, we've always valued an office. Space, yeah.

So even before we even had any idea what this Rhett and Link business was gonna be, we had an office. It was a free office. We used the basement of my father-in-law's, one of my father-in-law's dental offices, or like the admin headquarters for his dental practices, and it was this like storage area that was really,

if you ever watched the old school Rhett and Link cast or some of the stuff on our channel way back in the day, that was that space in Lillington. And we always have valued this, I mean, you know, both married with children before we started doing this job, so we really needed to find a way to get out. Now, I realize your question is that

if you don't have space for physical separation. You're giving them a verbal hug. You're feeling their pain because you don't feel like you could do it. Because we've always just said that, I know the way that we work, you know, and I think for different reasons. For me, I'm so easily distracted.

And for Link, you, it's not that you're distracted, it's that you are kind of driven crazy by. Frustrated. You're like more frustrated by not being able to get into a quiet space. And for me, if I'm in that space, I'm gonna get drawn into other things. I'm angered by it, you're enticed by it.

Right. But for both of us, not being able to get away is a huge problem. Yeah. But let's just try to answer the question in a way that, so I mean I would say, first of all, if there is any way to have some sort of shared workspace,

because there are very affordable shared workspaces now, there's all these, I don't even know the name of it, but basically you can get these work share deals where there's basically a desk somewhere. There are affordable options for people. Like a coffee shop is very affordable. Well I don't know what kind of work you're in. If you gotta be on the phone or something.

Yeah I'm kind of assuming that like you got, you need something that's not out in public. So I would say that- Like a library park bench type situation. If you want that separation, the easiest way to create it is to create physical separation and try to find a way to create physical separation

if you cannot find it in your home. But let's just assume that you can't do that, you can't afford that, there are no realistic options for separation, what do you do? Closet. Closet. Push all the clothes to one end of your closet.

You get in the other end. Close the door. I'm imagining there's kids running around. You might wanna, they never know you're in there. But that's still physical separation. There's no space for physical separation. You're saying find space. You don't think there's space, find the space?

Yeah, find the space. I'm saying let's just assume there is no space. This is a yurt. Let's say this is a closet-less yurt. Okay. Okay? At this point, I think you've got to have some sort of physical indicator on your body that indicates work time.

Like a bucket on your head? It could be a helmet. A helmet is not, a work hat. I got my work hat on. You know, I got my work glasses on. I got my work shirt on. And what it does is it puts you in a frame of mind that I'm working now and it puts the other individuals who may be

in your space with you, they're like, oh, mama's got a bucket on her head, she's working. So it can't be a literal bucket. No, but it could be. You're saying a hat. Helmet, hat, pair of awesome glasses, a wig. The work wig, we could sell that at Mythical.store. The wig for the working person.

And if you just put it on and you know, mama means business, daddy's on a roll, he's got his work wig on, what would it look like? It would be like a sharp, like a really professional cut. Slit down? You gotta have multiple models for whatever. I think it's big.

Some of them are big. We sell 12 of them. There's curly, a lot of curls, and the hair on the sides comes down. And then it goes down over the ears. And then it goes a bit forward to serve like blinders on a horse. The work wig for the man or woman

who wants to work like a horse. It also has a feed bag. Right, you don't have to get up. Because you don't have to get up and probably while we're at it, we'll attach one of those stadium pals that you just, it's like the external catheter and you just pee right into a bag.

You don't have to get up. You got a helmet on, you've got the trough to eat, and you've got a catheter. Somebody sketch this up so that we can patent it. Work wig. The work wig with complete, with built in. Feed bag and pee bag. Sound suppression, sound suppression.

Sound suppression. Blinders, pee bag optional. Sound suppression, sound suppression. Sound suppression. Blinders, P-Bag optional. P-Bag is optional. Poop bag, we don't have one of those. We don't have one of those. If you gotta take a crap, you gotta go to the bathroom. You need a break anyway. We did not help at all on that one.

A lot of these, I feel like we're helping a lot. You wanna end on a good one? You don't think that was a good one? The work wig sounds, workwig.net. Let's end on a good one? You don't think that was a good one? The workwig sounds, workwig.net. Let's end on a high note. Bert, a coworker with a nose whistle. Is that an instrument? Or is that a condition?

Might as well be sitting next to a foghorn. Oh gosh. Foghorn is low. Nose whistle is like, if your nose is built in a weird way and you start, if you're working and you're really deep into work, you almost get into like a meditative state with like those long breaths. It's a higher pitch thing.

It's tough to emulate unless you've actually got a booger that's creating the situation. Yeah, like if it's a booger, it wouldn't happen every day. This must be. No, no, you could, well, it could be a deviated septum. It must be anatomical. Yeah, like if it's a booger, it wouldn't happen every day. This must be. Ah, no, no, you could, well, it could be a deviated septum. It must be anatomical. Yeah. An anatomically

induced. Engendered. Foghorn-like nose whistle. Nose whistle. This is a problem. But I bet it only happens when you get into that work state where it's like this slow breathing. You think noise canceling headphones would help? Because a lot of people have misconceptions

about noise canceling headphones. They think that they cancel everything, but really they just isolate certain frequencies that are like monotonous in the background and then they take those out. That's why it gets rid of the engine noise, but then you can hear the person talking to you on a plane. If you wore like the quiet comforts in this Burt,

you would actually hear much more of just nose whistle. Well I'm sincerely asking the question, is a nose whistle sustained enough to be recognized as a frequency that can be chopped out? Because the other thing you could do, this is really, this is not great, this is not a great solution. So first we're saying, Bert, try noise canceling.

Get a pair of $300 headphones, and then take them back if they don't get rid of the nose whistle, but another, this could potentially work. So you get a laptop computer, you get an audio editing software, I don't know if GarageBand is capable of this, but probably.

Okay. It's getting pretty desperate these days. Roll with me on this. They get pretty pro. And then. I don't know what you're doing, but. You put headphones into the computer, so that, and then you're sending the sound.

You sound like a dumb person. You put headphones into the computer. What does that mean? You attach your earbuds to the external jack of the computer. Okay, to the laptop. And then you set it up so that you're running all the sounds of the room through the laptop

and through the audio software. And then you break out the filter that isolates certain frequencies and you turn it. You're talking Pro Tools, man. Yeah, well, I think, I haven't worked in GarageBand in a couple years, so I don't know if it's capable of this, but you may have to go Pro Tools,

or I know Logic can do it. Okay, yeah. So you get a copy of Logic. You're talking about frequency isolation filter. And there may be an iPhone app at this point, or just a phone app at this point that can do this. Now the problem is, so you let the nose whistle start and you move the isolation, the frequency back and forth

until you nail it and then it's gone. Now Rhett knows this because in all of our years of editing all of our internet videos, I don't know how we came up with this delineation, but I was like much more of the editor, like cutting style and details. But then when it came to like an audio pass, I would pass it off to you.

And cause that was more of a figure out a new thing that then applied to fixing certain problems like this, like, oh, there's a hum in this particular shot, the shot before and after it don't have it, so it's very distracting in the middle of say dialogue. And you could use these filters and find it. So you're saying apply that particular thing. Yeah the downside is you have to listen

to everything through a laptop. So that's, you know, you gotta carry this laptop with you. Cause it's like you're live recording your work environment. It's sound processing that is isolating that frequency. Well it's what happens in noise canceling headphones dynamically but it doesn't. You're doing it manually. This could be an awkward setup.

Otherwise, here's another potential solution that may be simpler. Punch them every time they start doing it. Like when your spouse snores. I don't mean like punch them hard, I mean nudge. Nudge them. That person's not asleep. They're like there just breathing.

Let's just assume that it is. I say just go up to them and before they know it, you've grabbed their nostrils. No, no physical contact. You gotta be passive about this. How about this, this might be a better idea. I doubt that it's anatomical. I'm guessing that it is a recurrent sinus infection

of some kind or this person just has certain shaped boogers and it just works itself out, right? Okay. And so it's a recurrent thing but it's not all the time. So we're talking about a nasal issue. You need to get one of those oil diffusers that you've got at your house. Oh, nice.

And you put in some sort of decongestant. They've got oils for everything. We got one at home that says digestion. I'm like, really? Don't give them the digestion, give them the decongestant. I'm gonna smell something and it's gonna help me digest better?

I bet you believe it. But I know there are decongestant oils. I like the smells. And so you put, and you really pump it. You might take four or five of these things. And this person may say, why do you have so many oil diffusers in our office? And I was like, I'm just trying to liven the place up.

And you keep adding an oil diffuser every single day until the nose whistle goes away. Until you get to like 20, at which point it would be excessive, and then you do the other thing I talked about with the laptop. Because if you were to go the direct route, which we often recommend, have the awkward conversation,

well, if it's anatomical, and I do believe that it is, what's the person gonna do? That's like saying, you know, that mole on your chin is really annoying me, can you have it removed? Well, the mole doesn't make a constant noise. I know, but it still is kind of the same thing. It's like, can you go to see an ENT and get them to ream out your nostrils so that I?

Maybe the breathe strips, like for snoring, speaking of snoring, maybe they will work. Maybe there's a way. I bet it would work. Every morning you could come up and you'd be like, you look so great, and you just touch them on the nose. Now you're doing the touching. No, but I'm doing a gentle touching. I'm congratulating. You gotta touch somewhere else. Touch the shoulder and you. Now you're doing the touching. No, but I'm doing a gentle touching. I'm congratulating.

You gotta touch somewhere else. Touch the shoulder and be like, you look like this. You look so great and that's when you attach it. You attach it, just to put a sticker on their nose. I did not consent to you touching my nose bridge. Your fingertips are so sweaty. No, it's not sweaty, it's oil. Oh, really?

Yeah. It's like from the diffuser. You just diffused my nose bridge. My hands are hot, man, I got hot hands. I can't smell it, it doesn't stink. They're not sweaty, they're just. It's gonna help with my digestion. They're hot. Okay, that's ludicrous.

Are you telling me that you're gonna. I gave three different options, just pick one and deal with it. But you could give them nasal strips as a Secret Santa. You gotta apply them with your hands though. Secret Santa's a good idea, any time of year. But then he just thinks he's snoring. How does he know I snore?

There's a note from Santa. I heard you snore. No, it's not about snoring. You have a nose whistle, brah. Yeah, or you could start recording it and then loop it into like a track. Create a new beat with it. I don't know.

I think we have helped at least one person. We've done it. Somebody got helped in that. We've done it. I'm sure, you know. I mean, some people probably got misguided advice, but again, that's why I did the disclaimer at the beginning. The light falling should have been a sign

for us not to continue. It was fate for us not to give advice tonight. We pressed on and now we're gonna reap, we're gonna reap what we've sown and here you are with us. And you know what? We'll speak more at you next week. Come on back. Tell your friends, bring them over.

If you dare. I'm curious how you would describe Ear Biscuits. Let us know. Let us know. Describe Ear Biscuits in an online short social commentary with hashtag Ear Biscuits. I legitimately would like to know how you would describe this show if you were gonna recommend it to someone.

Yeah. So please let us know, we'll look into that. We'll be interested in that. Hashtag your biscuits. And thank you.