Ear Biscuits with Rhett & Link - 172: Is Thanksgiving Better Without Family? | Ear Biscuits Ep. 172

Episode Date: December 3, 2018

Dessert karaoke or gas station card games? How would you rather spend your Thanksgiving? Rhett and Link compare how they spent their Thanksgivings this year to determine how they'd prefer to spend the... holiday in the future. Sponsored By:Pocket: visit the Android/IOs App Stores, or getpocket.com to download for freeHelloFresh: Visit HelloFresh.com/EAR60 and enter promo code ear60 for $20 off your first 3 boxesSpotify: Download the free app and start listening to podcasts on Spotify (including Ear Biscuits!) today. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 This, this, this, this is Mythical. Before we get started, we wanna let you know that Ear Biscuits is supported by Pocket. Pocket is your space to absorb all of the amazing content you find on the web. I call it the web, that's the internet. Very trendy. The interweb. Fill the Pocket app with those articles,
Starting point is 00:00:20 long reads and videos that catch your eye and create a quiet, clutter-free corner to focus on your interests where you can absorb knowledge without distraction. If you love podcasts, I think you do. Something tells me you at least love one podcast. Then you'll also love Pocket's new listen feature because any article you've saved can be read out loud
Starting point is 00:00:41 so the rest of you is free to cook, commute, workout, walk, or just relax and listen. It's basically an app that turns stuff that's not a podcast into a podcast. And if it's in your pocket, it's on all your devices so you can take advantage of any spare moment to fit more reading into your life, even when you're offline.
Starting point is 00:01:01 Transform the way you read with Pocket from Firefox. Download it for free from the Android or iOS app stores or at getpocket.com. Now on with the biscuit. Welcome to Ear Biscuits, I'm Link. And I'm Rhett. This week at the round table of dim lighting, we are exploring the question,
Starting point is 00:01:23 is Thanksgiving better without family? Oh, what, oh, really? Or is it better with family? Because it's kind of like a science experiment. We've got a control group and an experimental group because I went home to visit my family. I haven't told you much about it. So we're gonna catch up.
Starting point is 00:01:47 And you stayed behind. And I haven't told you much about it. And you haven't told me much about it. So I wanna figure this out. This is a legitimate question. First time ever that I went home for Thanksgiving actually. So I guess previous years are in form, I can experiment within my own family
Starting point is 00:02:06 of being with them or not for Thanksgiving. That is a good point. Yeah, there was some strategy that went into it and now on the backside of it, let's figure that out. Let's see what social science has to say. Not really, let's just see what we have to say. And before we get into that, I had an experience
Starting point is 00:02:28 that I wanted to tell you about. Is that right? As you know, you are a massage aficionado. Yeah, and in my next life, I'm gonna be, or in retirement, I guess, or tomorrow, if I really get fed up with this place, I'm gonna be a massage critic. Right, the first ever.
Starting point is 00:02:53 Like a restaurant critic, I'm gonna roll into places. You're gonna have a blog. And I'm gonna have like a well-written assessment, very detailed, about the massage I've gotten. Massageexpert.blogspot.com. You might think that, well, Link, that's Yelp. And you might be right, but you would be wrong because I don't get paid to write on Yelp.
Starting point is 00:03:15 And I would get paid to do this. Right, yeah, it's a booming business waiting to happen. So yeah, I fancy myself very into massages, receiving them. And I, you know, interestingly, I think I'm just as much, massageexpert.blogspot.com, it is a website. Of course it is, Link, you're gonna have to buy it
Starting point is 00:03:34 from that person. It's my website! The site where you can find anything about massage! Exclamation point. Oh. Hasn't been updated since when? 2000, 2009. 2009, okay, all right. I think you can get in for low, low price. I enjoy massage as well.
Starting point is 00:03:54 I venture to say I enjoy massage as much as you, but I have not been as aggressive in scheduling my own massages. I enjoy massage so much that two years ago when my in-laws asked my wife, what can you get for the guy who has everything? Oh gosh. What can you get for the guy who has a putting green
Starting point is 00:04:18 at his house? What can you get for the douche? What can we get for your douche bag husband? Now this is two years ago, you didn't have a putting green. Not yet, yeah. But you were a douche. And Jessie said, you know what would be really douchey? By the way, I don't wanna ever use that word again.
Starting point is 00:04:33 I don't like it. You don't wanna say douche. I think it's wrong on a bunch of levels. The word douche is something you don't wanna say. Can we come up with another word because this is a running gag but I just wanna use a different word. What is douche backwards?
Starting point is 00:04:45 I'm uncomfortable with it. Shoed? What is douche backwards? I gotta write it down. Look, look how douchey this is. I realized that I had so much merch on and then I realized if I did this. I gotta actually write this.
Starting point is 00:05:03 Ech-quad, ech-ude, E-H-C-U-O-D. Hey, look at this. Ech-quod, ech-uod. What if I seriously did this? Now for those of you just listening, I rolled my sleeves up and I got my hat on backwards. For those of you listening, you've made a great choice. I think is what we're at.
Starting point is 00:05:27 All right, he's being a- Do not watch the video. An equad, equad. This is, this, in fact- Keep going with your story. I would like people to take a screenshot of this and then put equad underneath it. Don't put me in the screenshot. Well actually you can put me in.
Starting point is 00:05:42 I'm doing it in my camera. Oh. I got one in my camera and I got one into put me in. I'm doing it in my camera. Oh. I got me, I got one in my camera and I got one into the wide camera. You can't get out of that. Equal. So your in-laws ask Jesse what could they give you and apparently you said a gift certificate for a massage
Starting point is 00:06:00 or do you want your in-laws to give you a massage? Like both of them. Well that was my first request. I wanted a four-hander. That's what they call that. No they don't. It is, I see. Can you get a massage from two people at once?
Starting point is 00:06:15 It's called a four-hand massage. I think that's called being a monarch. No, four-hand, I know it sounds like some weird thing you'd find on Urban Dictionary but that's, I've literally seen. No, don't lie to my face with that hat. Anyway, I. Good idea though.
Starting point is 00:06:33 I requested. I bet it cost over twice as much money. I requested a, I said. I wonder if. Okay, thanks for letting me. Yeah, I just feel like we're on to something. Can you call a massage place. Massageexpert.blogspot to something. Can you call a massage place?
Starting point is 00:06:45 Massageexpert.blogspot.com. Can you call a massage place and say, I would like a deep tissue massage for 90 minutes and I want two people? Can you do that? Yeah, they say it's double the price. Maybe they say it's, you know, maybe it's, you know, 1.5 the price, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:07:01 Let's find out, make a call. You guys, that could be your first blog. But guess what happened when I called and asked for a four-hander. I'm gonna do it. All right, I'm gonna do it. So anyway, Jesse said he likes massage and what that turned into is them getting me gift certificates
Starting point is 00:07:18 to several massage places. And of course, not being from here. Several massage places. they did not necessarily calculate the distance from where I'm at in town. Oh, okay, yeah. And where these massage places were and it would require a special trip, basically. And so I haven't gotten, I haven't done it.
Starting point is 00:07:44 But when you went home for Thanksgiving, you went home on a Sunday or Monday or something. And so I was here. Sunday, yeah. And I would like you to know I did work. I did work as much as my wife would let me. Just trying to get ahead, man. But the first day of Thanksgiving vacation,
Starting point is 00:08:06 I was like, you know what, the Redster needs some me time. And the Redster needs to go across town and get one of these massages. You were putting into practice our last conversation. Which I've thought a lot about, by the way. And so I go to this Thai massage place on the east. In Thailand? On the west side. That far?
Starting point is 00:08:26 No, it's just on the west side. And it was, so I would not have been able to tell you exactly what Thai massage was, even though now I realize I've had one before. Now that I've gone back, I'm like, oh, so now I understand. So I went to this place that was just really, I mean a really cool, like, I felt like I was, it was kind of just in the, not a strip mall,
Starting point is 00:08:50 but it was just on an office block in Santa Monica, but when you walked in, it was just like, oh, I've been trans, I've been. Transylvania? Transported into this rainforest cafe. Really, in Disneyland. Yeah. But the woman said, put this T-shirt and these pants on,
Starting point is 00:09:10 and they were Thai fisherman pants, and she was like, do you know how to put those on? I was like, yeah buddy, yeah I do, I got a pair at home. I've Googled that. And I've watched the YouTube video on how to do that, so yes, I know how to do it. And so I was like, oh this is interesting, because I was planning on getting naked.
Starting point is 00:09:26 Underwear underneath the tie pants? Yeah, no, no, I know because I've got pants on. Right. And then I go back out into the area. Until you don't. No, you don't take them off, you leave them on the whole time. Oh.
Starting point is 00:09:37 That's what I'm getting into is the massage area is basically communal. So not massage tables, but massage pads. No hole for your face, so you're not face down, you're face to the side. Or just face in the pillow suffocating yourself. Are these pads on the floor like kindergartners taking naps?
Starting point is 00:09:58 Well they were, yeah they were all on the floor. I mean it was like an elevated deck area with a bunch of curtains so that you could curtain off the different places, but there were multiple massages going on and you basically could kinda see and hear the other people who were around you and you left all this on. And then the reason that the massage happens on the floor
Starting point is 00:10:18 is because this woman proceeded to do a yoga routine on my back. In fact, she may have just been doing her yoga routine. It may have had nothing to do with massaging me at all. Maybe it was just a scheduling conflict and it was just a woman who showed up for yoga and just was on top of me the whole time. Awesome.
Starting point is 00:10:36 So listen, I have had one of these. Which was awesome, by the way. I think it was an early GMM episode. Oh, those don't matter. I think we was an early GMM episode. Oh those don't matter. I think we both had and talked about massages where women would stand on our backs and hold on the bars on the ceiling and then walk on your back and give you a massage
Starting point is 00:10:57 with their full body weight because they weighed like 80. And so that is Thai massage. But technically the being on the floor makes it authentic. Oh, and with the curtains, did you say that they pulled a curtain around so that no one could see this happening or was it a spectator sport? For privacy, yeah, they pulled it around.
Starting point is 00:11:16 Okay, so you couldn't see anyone else getting walked on. Right, but I knew that it was happening. It was like an operating room. But the thing that was notable about this was. With curtains. It was the most painful massage I have ever received. Now I've had some painful massages. I usually tell people go as hard as you possibly can,
Starting point is 00:11:39 I'll let you know if you need to let up. Oh yeah. And never before have I told somebody to let up. Me neither. I've just taken it. Me neither. You know, but this woman was poking and prodding me with her full body weight and it would get to a place where it was like all the weight,
Starting point is 00:11:58 I could have sworn she was balancing on an elbow is how it felt. On like your mid back? She would be the mid back, the low back, the shoulders, now first of all, there was all this stuff happening and I was going, as she would really dig in, I would go, oh, and that would be like the first signal
Starting point is 00:12:18 that like this is painful. Was that, did you do that consciously or did it eek out as she pressed on you? It started involuntarily and then it became like a code, a language. So. Well you know everyone can hear that through the sheet. I didn't care.
Starting point is 00:12:35 It hurt so bad I couldn't stop. Wow. But here's the thing, after a few times of going, I was like, hold on, does that sound like I'm enjoying it? Well, I can answer that and the answer is yes. And then my follow up statement is, I don't wanna hear it again. Okay, well, you're gonna hear more than that
Starting point is 00:12:55 because I gotta keep going, I gotta tell you the whole language. You were thinking. I gotta teach you the whole language. You were inventing the language. I invented the language. So after about 10 minutes of going, Oh. Really? I invented the language. So after about 10 minutes of going, oh.
Starting point is 00:13:08 Really? I realized that she may think that I'm digging this. But you weren't. She was digging me, man. She was digging into me. Digging into you, yeah. And I knew that it was helping. You know what I'm saying?
Starting point is 00:13:21 Like she would get on a knot, I could feel her on a knot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And she's working that knot and I'm like, you gotta work that knot, you gotta work my booty knot. She didn't really work the booty knot. She would just work the muscle knots. Love the way you work my booty knot. And um.
Starting point is 00:13:35 I'm tight. There was one. I'm so stressed. There was one time where she was so into the shoulders. Need someone to work my chest. That I was like, I'm gonna have to change the language up. And at that point I was just like, oh! Really? Oh now!
Starting point is 00:13:53 You said oh now. I was like, I gotta move beyond mm's, and I gotta go oh! What about, how about just wait! Oh now? I was like oh, yeah, because I was like, because I thought that the next. Oh now, too far.
Starting point is 00:14:10 That's the rectum. What, I mean it seems. No, man, it was on the shoulder. Oh okay. The next part was gonna be stop. I didn't wanna say that, you know, you don't wanna do that. Stop!
Starting point is 00:14:21 So I thought oh, and then at that point she was like, is this hurting you? And I was like, yeah, a little bit. You know, it was like, yes, I feel like I'm about to die. I didn't say that. Now you had given her the speech, go for it and I'll let you know if it's too much. No, no, because I saw what was happening, I was like, this is gonna be painful.
Starting point is 00:14:44 You didn't say anything. Let me tell you, by the time this was over, she had done a couple of things where, she did this one thing where she sat on my shoulders like I was about to take her on a piggyback ride. She's like, okay, now stand up. Let's get out of here. What did she think?
Starting point is 00:15:03 I gotta reach something on the top shelf in the back room. Is she gonna say, get up, and I'm just supposed to go? But what she was doing is. It's like Yoda with Luke Skywalker, man. She was sitting on top of me, and I was sitting with my legs crossed in front of me,
Starting point is 00:15:20 and then she sat on my back and folded me down. Oh no. And I was like, and I, you know, I'm just so prideful. I'm just so prideful. I can't tell people that that shouldn't happen to me. You know? And so she folds me in half and then she's like, you're so flexible.
Starting point is 00:15:39 And then I'm thinking, well, not really. I'm just too prideful to say that you are breaking me in half. Like I'm going to have to go to a doctor. Thankfully my back is in very good shape now compared to. I mean, especially with your back, I'm surprised. Well, first of all, my back is in great shape. So I actually. Until that.
Starting point is 00:16:00 I mean, you don't. No, no, no. I would have stopped her if I really thought that something was gonna happen with my back. You were sitting crisscross applesauce and then she put your nose into the mat? Yeah, but I am flexible. I'm very flexible. Okay, okay. And you're prideful and you're doing, okay, yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:15 No, but I've been told by many people now, so flexible, my physical, my personal trainer. You know who you sound like, right? I'm so flexible. Many people tell me how flexible I am. No, well that's not like saying I'm the humblest person I know. I'm just saying that I'm proud of myself
Starting point is 00:16:31 and the flexibility I've gained and I've done it for the sake of my back and it actually has been very helpful for my life and for my Thai massage experiences so I don't have to say, hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Don't ride me like a horse. But when she said, am I hurting you, you said yes. I said you could go a little easier.
Starting point is 00:16:49 You made it about her. Yeah and then she said. You're not doing it right. And then she said don't die. Don't die. Yeah she'd said that but she was kind of being funny. Don't die. Anyway I felt incredible coming out of there
Starting point is 00:17:05 and I felt like I don't know if I can do this again because I do think I was preoccupied with being injured the whole time. Was it a high, it sounds like a high end place. Yeah, yeah, it was, it was very high end. Yeah, yeah, it wasn't one of these strip mall locations that the cops might show up at any point. It wasn't one of those.
Starting point is 00:17:24 It was, this is legit, man. This is legit. I got a T after I got done and everything. I've had T. Lots of people have had T. I'm tempted to go there, because that seems like a good. Well, there's one on the east side as well.
Starting point is 00:17:40 You could be a guest blogger on my site. Guest post from Red MC. Oh no. You can have audio files of my massage language. Proven to work. Proven to work at one time massage. Whoa now. Whoa.
Starting point is 00:18:01 Wow. Oh goodness. So that's it man, that's my massage, thanks for asking. Dang, man, snapped you in half. So we're gonna talk about Thanksgiving travels and experiences, but first we wanna let you know that Ear Biscuits is supported by HelloFresh. Yeah, HelloFresh is a meal kit delivery service
Starting point is 00:18:22 that shops, plans, and delivers step-by-step recipes and pre-measured ingredients so that you can just cook, eat, and enjoy. There's something for everyone. Did I say everyone? Yes, I did. With HelloFresh's selection. Make family dinners fuss-free
Starting point is 00:18:39 with HelloFresh's picky eater, tested and approved family plan recipes. Even Link likes it a lot. Did you say that directed at me? Yes, and then I clarified. Yes, it is directed at you. I'm a discerning eater. Yeah, you might be a super taster.
Starting point is 00:18:55 Super taster approved. Rediscover the excitement of cooking. Global Eats Options brings authentic international dishes and flavors to home cooks and of course, that is very exciting to have new international meals in your home. HelloFresh believes cooking should be simple and convenient, not a chore.
Starting point is 00:19:15 You won't spend all night in the kitchen unless you just live in the kitchen. Sleeping in the kitchen. Which I have done, I have done. You just put a sleeping bag in there but you won't be in there while you're cooking for too long because recipes only take about 30 minutes. There's something comforting about sleeping next to a sink.
Starting point is 00:19:31 I thought about putting one next to my bed. Water at any time. Exactly, and there are many benefits of subscribing. So you can keep enjoying HelloFresh week after week. You can spend less time meal planning and grocery shopping each week, and get that time back to do more of what you love, like sleeping in the kitchen.
Starting point is 00:19:47 Or like eating hot honey barbecue chicken legs with a charred poblano corn and sweet potato. I like sriracha lime cheeseburgers with roasted potato wedges. But when I read sriracha, I realized there's another R. So is it not? It's sriracha. Sriracha?
Starting point is 00:20:04 Yeah. I like how it tastes, I just don't like reading it. For a total of $60 off, that's $20 off your first three boxes, visit hellofresh.com slash ear60 and enter ear60. Again, that's a total of $60 off, that's $20 off your first three boxes if you visit hellofresh.com slash ear60 and enter ear60.
Starting point is 00:20:24 We also wanna let you know that Ear Biscuits is supported by Spotify. It's coming. The annual flood of year end best of lists is almost here. But rest easy, here's one best of list that you won't even have to read. Why, because I'm gonna read it? Yep.
Starting point is 00:20:40 Okay, I'm ready. All the best new podcasts of 2018 are on Spotify, from binge-worthy mini-series to a somewhat concerning number of shows about murder. Your epic voice sounds like when you call the bank to get this temperature. It doesn't sound like a movie trailer. But you know what, I think that's a good thing.
Starting point is 00:21:01 There's no easier way to keep up with all your favorite shows and discover new ones. You just hurt my feelings. Podcast on Spotify, they're streaming free right now. Now, on with the biscuit. I decided, well it was a long, actually many years went into when is the Christmas that we're not gonna go home, but we're gonna stay here in Los Angeles went into when is the Christmas
Starting point is 00:21:28 that we're not gonna go home, but we're gonna stay here in Los Angeles and celebrate as just an immediate family. Every single year, I guess for six years. Well, I try eight. Really? Yeah. This Christmas will be eight years in Los Angeles for us? This Christmas would be the ninth. Wow.
Starting point is 00:21:45 Because your first one was in 2011, right? And so if you count the one and the eight, no, so this year would be, yeah, this year would be the ninth. Okay, I'll take your word for it because my brain's kinda hurting. Right? No, I think it's one of the.
Starting point is 00:22:00 No, this year would be the eighth. This year would be the eighth, starting in 2011. So the seven previous years we'd go home, we'd stay here for Thanksgiving or go on vacation. That was because summers were so crazy, we would take vacations over Thanksgiving, we both would. We both would. And then for Christmas time,
Starting point is 00:22:18 leading up to the new year, we'd go home for the past seven years. But I don't know, you kinda wanna experiment and say, you don't have your own thing, okay? With your immediate family. Like before we moved, we were starting to do the thing where grandparents and aunts and uncles or slash siblings would come visit us and we'd have our own thing and our own traditions
Starting point is 00:22:46 and then people would show up at different times and we'd still go to places on Christmas night or Christmas Eve, that type of stuff, but like we had special Christmas morning. That was a special time for us. Very special. Insert whatever special holiday time for you and your family is appropriate
Starting point is 00:23:03 if it's a different set of holiday. It's still all applicable, I believe. I just wanna include you all. But my point is, once we moved out here, we didn't have any of that because like the week leading up to Christmas and all the way afterward, it was just, we were itinerant and I've talked about this, I'm sure on the podcast many times
Starting point is 00:23:29 as we've caught each other up. But we decided, okay, this is the year we're gonna stay here, but we'll go home for Thanksgiving instead. And it'll be a little early and then we'll help, we'll talk it over with family members. Some have a more developed opinion than others and you gotta talk to them in certain orders
Starting point is 00:23:51 and get everybody's buy-in. But everybody was very gracious and it turns out they were even thinking, yeah, I think this would be good for you guys. Your kids are getting older, you need to have your own traditions and your own things that you wanna do. So I was very relieved that all of our family was on board.
Starting point is 00:24:15 So you think this is the new normal? I think it can go either way now. But at this point, I mean, well, I haven't experienced Christmas here, so I don't know. If it goes as well as I have like super high hopes. Christmas here may suck, man. It may suck, I don't know. But people say it's a ghost town here in Los Angeles.
Starting point is 00:24:36 It's like it transforms into a different city where no one's here and like I'm pretty interested in that. That would be cool. And I just have the run of the city.. And just have the run of the city. Yeah. Just have the run of the city. Just like take Christmas trees everywhere. Just like loot.
Starting point is 00:24:51 Like go looting with my family. That's what I plan to do. That's good, that's good. Take empty stockings and fill them with people's valuables? Yeah. That's a fun Christmas tradition. So I don't know, the jury's still out, but I'm saying that that's a possibility,
Starting point is 00:25:05 that it may be the new normal when you're talking about traditions like that. People can come visit us and be included in it. We're not being exclusive. But anyway, it felt really good for people to be supportive and so we went home for Thanksgiving as part of that and we stayed at Christy's sister's house where we, that's our home base now.
Starting point is 00:25:28 And my nephew Nehemiah, he's three years old and he's wide open. It was great to be there and hang out with him and the kids just hanging out with him but he got this, he wanted to perform these songs. He has original songs. So everyone would be sitting around and he would get up in front of everybody
Starting point is 00:25:50 and he would make Lincoln Orlando play the drums. He'd be like okay play really hard. Like play really and he would get angry. He'd be like, he would like channel anger as a way to say how hard he wanted the drums to be played. I like this kid. On like a basket. He's three?
Starting point is 00:26:05 Play harder! And he would grab the hands that are holding the sticks and he would say play really hard. And then once you got it to like Lars, not Lars Ulrich, but what's the drummer for Metallica? Is that him? How about the drummer for John Cougar Mellencamp? Kenny Arnoff.
Starting point is 00:26:24 What about John Bonham? I mean once he got Lincoln to full John Bonham, like just breaking sticks, then he starts singing. And he's like, Brittany kept having to encourage him, now remember, we're gonna use a singing voice, not a yelling voice. I like this kid a lot. Yeah, I love him.
Starting point is 00:26:43 Scream out already. And I like him. And he's like, he just launches into, we make the rules, we make the rules, we make the rules! And it turns out, this was a collaboration with another cousin of his that wasn't present at the time. So that was the we. The we, I was about to say.
Starting point is 00:27:07 He and his other cousin. It's very insightful. It gives lots of insight into the psyche of a three-year-old. Right, there is a song. To this boy at least. There is a song in which they've created a world in which they make the rules.
Starting point is 00:27:21 Yeah, they're in charge. We make the rules. Because the world is all about rules when you're three. Yes, it's all about rules. And it's like, you know what, we're gonna make them. Ultimately, you realize that he captured basically the spirit of rock and roll in his song. Yeah, man.
Starting point is 00:27:40 No, we make the rules. If rock and roll were acapella except for your older cousin playing drums on a wicker basket, then yes, that's like intense rock and roll. That is the underlying message of all rock. Not the sound though. Right. Maybe in the voice, like the screaming could even work.
Starting point is 00:27:58 You don't even have to tell him not to scream. And then there was another one that, I don't remember the tune, but it was basically something like, anything we can do, we can do! It was like the same concept. I like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:13 And it was, I don't remember the exact words, it was basically like that. We can do anything that we can do. And we're gonna do it. It's kind of a tautology. You know why? Because if you flip the record over, we make the rules! And you would cheer and it was fabulous, man.
Starting point is 00:28:32 I could listen. Like yes, make the rules, Nehemiah, do that. Your wife actually, or your wife, I don't know, somebody in your family did post this on their Instagram. So I had to say that I have seen the We Make the Rules. I've been singing it all week. Can't get it out of my head. We make the rules!
Starting point is 00:28:53 I mean it's kinda like that anything you can dream, you can do that Lando performed at his school that one of the guys, one of the parents wrote and then I was like that's not true Lando, remember? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Broke his, shattered his dreams. But I'm like but you know what, you can make some rules. You and Nehemiah can make your own rules.
Starting point is 00:29:15 The day before Thanksgiving we went to my nana's house, my dad's mom's house and you know, I'm not gonna get too sad but I will say that it was, it was difficult in one way particular because it was the first time Papa wasn't there, you know, having passed away months ago and with my uncle Dan also passing away right before that which I've talked about on the show.
Starting point is 00:29:45 So it's like there was this anticipation of okay, there's gonna be some empty seats, so to speak. Now, it was never a plan to leave seats empty. But actually, what happened, what had happened was after our concert, I've told you this, right? We went to, well, at our concert, I've told you this, right? We went to, well, at our concert at the North Carolina State Fair, my mom and Louis rode there with my dad and Nancy.
Starting point is 00:30:17 So this is your parents and their new partners hanging out together. Yeah, and Nana all rode in dad's truck up there because they were concerned about parking. But it has been 30 years or more than that since your parents were a couple, so it's, Oh yeah. We've had a lot of time for the awkwardness
Starting point is 00:30:36 to settle a little bit. Well, but it's still unusual. They have never ridden in the same car anywhere. Right, right, right, right. And so when Dad and Nancy offered to take them, I was like okay, I'll let them know. And then like they did it and it went great. And then come to find out on the ride there
Starting point is 00:30:55 or the ride back, they're talking about Thanksgiving plans and how we're coming into town for Thanksgiving, not Christmas time and they're like, you know what? Dad and Nancy were like, Sue, you and Louis should come to our Thanksgiving. And I'm hearing about this and I'm like, after they had decided, they were like, well we were invited, I was like, oh it's,
Starting point is 00:31:15 I was like, sounds weird but. Awesome. Great, okay. We make the rules. So for the first time ever, my mom came to my dad's side of the, to like a big family event on my dad's side of the family. But I will say, because for.
Starting point is 00:31:36 Even birthday parties growing up. I mean they were all separate. I'd have twice as many birthday parties, twice as many Christmases. What I'm getting at is, you know, this is super common in modern society for families to split up and there'd be two entities and then the children have to kinda make choices
Starting point is 00:31:56 and go from place to place. It is pretty novel concept. If you can all get along. I mean, it sounds like a movie, which it probably is. Yeah, Christmas Eve, we'd always go to Nanny's house, my mom's mom, my dad's side of the family had nothing to do with it because Christmas night was Nana's night for my dad's side of the family.
Starting point is 00:32:14 My mom had nothing to do with that. I was the only one that would do both and it was great because I got, you know, you end up getting a lot more presents, I think. Yeah, definitely. But now I don't really get much presents and this is Thanksgiving, so presents are out of the equation.
Starting point is 00:32:29 Oh, your family doesn't do Thanksgiving presents, huh? No, they don't. We're not even thankful. Oh. Just kidding. So. We don't even do thankful. It was this interesting dynamic and there's like, I mean, there's, I think there were, what was the number?
Starting point is 00:32:44 It ended up being like 16 people there. So it wasn't like an awkwardly small group of people sitting around a small table. It was still a very, we're putting a bunch of tables together. It was, it turned out to be, you know, there were still moments of it being very sad, you know? It's like really experiencing missing these key members
Starting point is 00:33:03 of our family for the first time. So it in no way erases that, but it created something new. I mean, my cousin Kurt and they had a newborn, three months old, first time we met the baby. It was like, so there's all this excitement that gives something to celebrate, you know, which was very much needed. And then it's like, and then I looked down
Starting point is 00:33:35 at that end of the table and it's like, my mom's sitting there, it's like so weird, but like, this is great. I mean, I think everybody's having a good time and you know everybody did have a good time. It all worked out and at one point, you know I've talked about Louis, my stepdad who I'll never call my stepdad because that's just weird
Starting point is 00:33:57 because they got married way after I got married but I'm like his catchphrase, good, good, good. Talked about that right? Yes good, talked about that, right? Yes. We talked about, we built it up with the kids, we're like, all right, Papa Louis is gonna be at the Thanksgiving dinner tonight. They're like, tonight, at Nana's?
Starting point is 00:34:14 I'm like, yes! Let's do a drinking game, kids. Every time, he says, good, good, good. You take a shot of gravy. That's a good idea. And I'm like, silly, you gotta listen for it. And then, lo and behold, the kids get up from the table. We're all sitting there at the table after the food,
Starting point is 00:34:35 after everybody's eaten. Some people start getting up, they're doing stuff, but most of the people are still at the table. And then Louis is like, oh boy that was good. My ears perk up. And I look across the table at Christy. He's like pulling a cord. Christy's eyes met mine and he was like,
Starting point is 00:34:54 oh gosh that was good. Good, good, good. I was like yes! And then Christy and I looked at each other and that was like the best moment of Thanksgiving and then I look around for the kids and they're not at the table. Oh they didn't even witness it.
Starting point is 00:35:06 I think Lily was at the table and she didn't hear it somehow. And that was the only good, good, good of the whole. You're kidding. That's the only one he did. And he gave you like a warning shot. Yeah. I mean everybody could have gathered around
Starting point is 00:35:19 during that pause. I got it, I just wanted the kids to get it. I mean the next day, which was Thanksgiving day, we're at Nanny's house, so my mom's side of the family. My dad and Nancy weren't invited to that, I don't know. It didn't go both ways. I don't know what happened. Interesting.
Starting point is 00:35:34 And we're there and Louis didn't give a good, good, good there, it was good, good, good. Did he have a bad, bad, bad Thanksgiving? Well, after, it was great. Thanksgiving was great there, it was like Nanny and her siblings, Uncle it was great. Thanksgiving was great there. It was like Nanny and her siblings. Uncle Jimmy was there. Never seen Uncle Jimmy.
Starting point is 00:35:52 Yeah. He was there. He's hard to understand. I love the way he talks, I'm just saying. It needs to be subtitled. Yeah, it needs to be, he's like. He needs to have his own subtitle around his neck. You need to have a relative. He needs to have an iPad that he wears
Starting point is 00:36:10 that subtitles him. I'm not gonna do an impersonation because I think that would be cruel, but I love him for it. That's the thing about getting together with your family is just, yeah, I'm in more observation mode. It's not like we're getting into deep conversations or anything.
Starting point is 00:36:27 We're just sitting around. Nanny gets so cold that she set the, literally, it was like 85 degrees. Tropical. And so like after we've eaten and it's 85 degrees and you're sitting shoulder to shoulder in this like carpeted living room with like the kerosene heater on,
Starting point is 00:36:46 like everybody just started wilting, man. And then a couple of family members would have to go outside to smoke and then they'd come back in and like me and Christy are really sensitive to the smell of smoke and like we got headaches from just the residual smell on the clothes and we started to really have a difficult time.
Starting point is 00:37:03 So we had to, I was like, well, Mom and Louis had to go to Louis' family's thing and then we were gonna stay like two more hours. I'm like, after another hour and the dog show's over and stuff, I'm like. The dog show? We were wilting, we had to like get out of there. So I'm like, well, and we had seen Nanny another day before so we got some good quality time in
Starting point is 00:37:25 and then I was like, we said our goodbyes and headed out. And then we get out to the car and Christy's like, well, we can't go back to Brittany's because they're not there, they're at JB's family's house and we don't have a key so that we don't have somewhere to be for like two and a half hours. I'm like, well, I really need a coffee. And it's Thanksgiving Day and we're driving around
Starting point is 00:37:46 to McDonald's and then I get to McDonald's, I'm like yes and then the daggone McDonald's is closed. Oh yeah, because you're in Lillington. I look across, I'm in Anger, and then I look across the street and there's a, they got like a gas, I can't get gas station coffee. So then we drive to Fuquay, I'm like, there's a McDonald's in Fuquay, there's a Starbucks in Fuquay. I'm like, there's a McDonald's in Fuquay,
Starting point is 00:38:05 there's a Starbucks in Fuquay. I go to both of those, they're both closed. I'm getting desperate. I go to the Dunkin Donuts, closed. I'm starting to feel like a real loser now. I'm driving my family around on Thanksgiving Day just fiending for coffee and getting turned away like Les Mis. Well, okay, that's a little, okay. I don't remember the away like Les Mis.
Starting point is 00:38:25 Well, okay, that's a little, okay. I don't remember the story of Les Mis, I didn't watch the movie. It's exactly like that. Christy's like, there's a Sheetz. I'm like, gas station coffee? Oh, Sheetz is not a gas station. Well you know what, I have never been in a Sheetz.
Starting point is 00:38:43 I've never been inside of one. What? I've heard about inside of one. What? I've heard about them. You can order food from the gas pump. You can order lattes from a screen inside, which I did. Of course you did. And that explains why on Christmas Day, me and my immediate family were playing cards
Starting point is 00:38:59 for an hour and a half in a Sheetz gas station because we had nowhere to be. That's why I got a group text of you playing cards in a gas station on Thanksgiving. And I felt kinda defeated. I'm like, is this a father fail? Does this answer the question at the top of the show that it's better to not be with family on Thanksgiving
Starting point is 00:39:28 because here I am choosing to play cards just with my kids and my wife in a Sheetz gas station? I mean. And then Christy's like, you know what? This could be a tradition. Oh gosh. And it's a magical phrase. No matter what happens, if it's bad, try this.
Starting point is 00:39:50 Next time you're in like a weird, defeated, or odd holiday situation, just don't even think about it. Just say it out loud, speak it into the ether. This could be a tradition. Everything changed at that moment. Like I got a tingle on my spine. I'm like, you know what? A Sheetz tingle.
Starting point is 00:40:09 I got a Sheetz tingle. I'm like, yeah, we can, even if we're not here for Thanksgiving, we can fly all the way here to go to this Sheetz. It's like, no, we didn't mean that, but it changed the perspective on the whole thing. A sponsorship from Sheetz would definitely change. Okay, yeah, work it.
Starting point is 00:40:26 Change the. Work it. Change it. So that was my Thanksgiving. And by the way, then I left there and we met Britton and his family at a Waffle House. So I went from a Sheetz and then spent the next two and a half hours at a Waffle House on Thanksgiving night. That's an upgrade.
Starting point is 00:40:42 Both places are great, but Waffle House, that's prime. I walked in, we walked in the Waffle House and the manager looked at us and he said, out loud, basically at the top of his voice, he said, what the hell? And I thought it was like, yeah, Thanksgiving night, I know, we're here at a Waffle House. Of course, so are you, manager.
Starting point is 00:41:06 It's great that you're here so that I can be here. And then it turned out at the end he was a fan. But he didn't tell me that until that was his reaction. Two and a half hours later. So yeah, gas station and a Waffle House on Thanksgiving night. It can be a tradition.
Starting point is 00:41:21 That's my update, brother. Okay. Well, I had a different experience. Pretty much same backstory, been going home for Christmas every year. Yeah. But all of a sudden we can't go home for either Thanksgiving or Christmas
Starting point is 00:41:38 because of my son's basketball commitments. Which just means we're gonna get the LA Christmas as well, but we also got the LA Thanksgiving, we got family coming out for Christmas, so taking care of that. But, after having been, we've traveled as a family for the past few Thanksgivings, and so this was sort of the first, well we did the Friendsgiving thing years ago, but this was kind of a new group of people.
Starting point is 00:42:11 And the people who invited us were very close to, but then they kind of invited a lot of people that they know that they're close to. So there was people that I had seen like once and there was people I'd never seen and there were like 25 people at this Friendsgiving. Which is big in LA. Yeah, because you got all these people
Starting point is 00:42:32 who don't go back home and nobody is with their extended family and so. You don't want to find yourself alone in the sheets. And you got a lot of single people, you got a lot of young couples without children. And so I think it was basically just me and my kids and then one other family and their kids were the only families with kids
Starting point is 00:42:55 and then everybody else was younger, more vibrant. I saw a picture of the group. Sharp looking group, big group. I'd say there was 24 people. 25. 25 people? Yeah, yeah, you dressed up a little bit for it. I did?
Starting point is 00:43:10 I thought that you did. It looked like you were wearing a sweater. I had a sweater on, yeah, I had my Thanksgiving sweater on. Yeah, yeah. It was made out of turkey feathers. If you had been close enough, you could have seen that. I'll have to zoom in.
Starting point is 00:43:23 That on my cranberry pants. But you couldn't see that because of the angle. The pants were made out of like the. The skins of cranberries. The skin that hangs off a turkey's neck. Yeah right, they're just bright red. Wrinkly, looks like leather unless you get close. Like a turkey nut sack.
Starting point is 00:43:43 Scrotum pants. But the scrotum does hang from the chin of a turkey. Dot com. So, I was very excited because you know me, I love to eat. And I was very excited because the friend of the person who was kind of throwing this was like, they're gonna take care of the food.
Starting point is 00:44:05 And a few people did make things to bring. Like my wife made a sweet potato casserole, southern style with some pecans on top, brown sugar. You know, just traditional Thanksgiving side, very good. And here's what I'll say. I call that a pre-dessert, not a side, not a dessert, but anyway. I enjoyed the meal quite a bit.
Starting point is 00:44:32 You had your staples and your turkey, you had your gravy, your cranberry sauce, chutney, whatever. And then the sides that people had brought. But I did notice something. You know, first of all, there was obviously a vegan option for basically everything. And this is Los Angeles, so you got like a vegan option for the turkey, but it wasn't like a tofu turkey.
Starting point is 00:44:56 They had like seitan, which I call Satan. I just go straight for that. It's very big of you to invite Satan to your Thanksgiving celebration. Satan's steak, we have cut him up and served him on Thanksgiving. Be thankful for his death. But the thing that I kinda noticed is that
Starting point is 00:45:18 the only thing on my plate that had the quantities of butter and sugar and flour that I feel like constitutes Thanksgiving was what my wife brought. And I gotta say, I know that that's just a Southern boy coming to Los Angeles. I specifically remember one of the first potlucks we ever came to when we came out here. It was quite the eye-opening, mouth-shut out here. This, this, this. It was quite the eye opening mouth shutting experience.
Starting point is 00:45:48 Yeah, yeah, it was like all these people brought all these sides. And this one girl was like, I made this, this is Paula Deen's recipe. And I'm like eating it, I'm like, really? Cause she's, and then as I'm eating it, she's like, and you know what? I used half the butter and half the sugar
Starting point is 00:46:02 that Paula called for and it's still good. And I'm thinking, Paula knows best, bro. Have you seen the silhouette of that woman? She knows how much butter and sugar you're supposed to put in things. Right, right. And there's just a different mentality. And you know what?
Starting point is 00:46:19 It's probably a better mentality. It's probably a mentality that leads to a longer, healthier life, but when you. Thanksgiving only comes once a year. When you've decided to throw caution to the wind, I could have. Unfurl the sails. I could have butter injected directly into my veins on Thanksgiving, I would do that if that was a thing.
Starting point is 00:46:41 We could make it a tradition. And so, I gotta, so, because dessert time happened and I was like, oh, there's a pumpkin pie. And then I, they had labeled everything and it was pumpkin pie vegan. Vegan. And I was like, mm. And there was like chocolate pie, raw, vegan.
Starting point is 00:47:02 What? And then it was like, some kind of bites, vegan. Man. Now you know how vegan people normally feel, right? And so what I thought was, I was just like, man, I just wanna go to Ralph's right now and just get a pumpkin pie from Ralph's. You know, just get a grocery store pumpkin pie,
Starting point is 00:47:22 put some whipped cream on top, and then unbutton my pants and enjoy myself. Right. You know, just get a grocery store pumpkin pie, put some whipped cream on top, and then unbutton my pants and enjoy myself. You know? So that was an adjustment. It was an adjustment that I feel like I can be ready for next year. It just, I think I'm gonna bring my own butter and my own sugar.
Starting point is 00:47:37 And I'm just gonna squeeze, squeeze, squeeze. IV, bring an IV bag. A squeegee of butter and then like a sugar shaker and I'm just like, don't mind me. You know, just to kind of get things out to the standard. Just bring stuff and label it unapologetically unvegan. Yeah, that sounds like a good brand. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:01 And then the tagline is make it a tradition. Resell it at Walmart, make millions. Don't commercialize my holiday slogan. I can't help but commercialize things. I helped a lot of people, man. But one traditional thing that happened was is the host said we're gonna go around and we're gonna say what we're thankful for.
Starting point is 00:48:24 Because it's Los Angeles, you kinda have to say we're gonna do the cliche thing and we're gonna say what we're thankful for. And you know, everybody was saying kind of the traditional things, you know, family and friends. What was your gut knee jerk reaction to that announcement? What was your gut knee jerk reaction to that announcement?
Starting point is 00:48:48 Well, I'm all. I can think of three. What was my gut knee jerk reaction to having. To the announcement of the assignment that this cliche thing was gonna happen. Well there's always a slight increase in heart rate. Yeah. I think that for every normal person, even somebody who.
Starting point is 00:49:02 Don't speak for people, I'm asking for you. Don't normalize your response, just tell me what yours was, I'm curious. Well a slight increase in heart rate. Okay. And then. That's normal, most people that would. And then like okay, I gotta say something
Starting point is 00:49:16 that sort of mixes humor and heart in the right way. This is a branding moment. I don't exactly remember what I said I was thankful for. Because there was a second question that I do remember everything that I said. Oh, you don't remember what you were thankful for? No, it was something about new friends and family and then I said, I made a joke.
Starting point is 00:49:40 It went over well, trust me. But then the second thing that happened while we were eating, which I found very interesting, was there was a guy there that was a life coach. Again, of course. Was he paid to be there? If you get 25 people together in Los Angeles, one of them will be a life coach.
Starting point is 00:50:01 That's code for something, right? I don't know what. If you don't have one life coach per 25 people in Los Angeles, the entire city implodes. It's funny, the cashier at Sheetz was a life coach. So. Did he have a tag? How did you know he was a life coach? Well.
Starting point is 00:50:22 A hat? If someone is a life coach or a vegan or into CrossFit. You know it, yeah right. You know what I'm saying? You find out pretty early in the conversation. Right, right. So I. That's true.
Starting point is 00:50:38 I, he stands up. Make a list of those things. He stands up and he says, we're gonna all answer this question. And again, I liked it because it was intentional conversation and it was 25 people at a table and you're kinda talking to the people around you but then it's kinda putting everybody on the spot,
Starting point is 00:50:54 even the kids, both of my kids had to stand up and answer this question. But it was the traditional question of if you had a superpower, what would it be and what would be your first mission? Oh, I actually it be and what would be your first mission? Oh I actually haven't heard what would be your first mission. First mission was new to me, because that's the kind of thing that a life coach
Starting point is 00:51:10 adds to it, you understand? Because what's your favorite superpower, that's just normal folk. What's your first mission, life coach, business card, here you go. But the heart rate goes up even more when that happens. Yeah, I'm like, ooh, curve ball. Now is precious time to shine.
Starting point is 00:51:31 So I said, and it was, one guy requested, he said, instead of going around, can we just do popcorn style? Can we just, as you know, what you, can you share? I was like, that's a good idea. Why is that a good idea? Because he wanted to get dibs on invisibility or something. Because of the inevitability of it coming to you
Starting point is 00:51:54 and you're just thinking about what you're gonna say. He had a reason, it was good. I thought it was great at the moment. But I had actually had this exact discussion with my wife the week before. Now we've talked about what our favorite superpowers would be before, we argued about it at some point on the Debaterama I think, I can't remember anything
Starting point is 00:52:14 that we do around here, but I know we've talked about superpowers and I personally. Invisibility versus invincibility was one of our first. But we did invisibility versus flight and then. Yeah we did. I versus flight and then, I've always said that teleportation is the superpower that I would choose because it replicates, technically can replicate invisibility and flight
Starting point is 00:52:34 for all practical purposes. I would, are you asking me now? Because I would choose being able to double myself and be invisible so I could creep on myself and not even know it. Wow, interesting and disturbing. But I did not say that because that's the canned answer. I actually said what I talked to my wife about. This is Thanksgiving, you don't eat canned ham.
Starting point is 00:52:59 I was, Jessie and I were with each other eating something and I was eating some bad food. Is this a dream? You lost me. This is the week before that gave me the answer to the superpower thing. Okay. And I said, you know what?
Starting point is 00:53:11 If I could have a superpower, it would just be to turn everything that is bad for me to eat into things that are good for me. The whole thing would just flip. So it would be like, you know, fried chicken, processed meats, and it would be, not only would it taste good, but it would make me feel the way that good, healthy food
Starting point is 00:53:29 would feel and be synthesized by your body. So did you tell them this and did that just incriminate you in what you were, the thoughts you were consumed by? So I was like, I'm gonna go early because I want so I can enjoy everyone's answer. Oh, I like that. So people got up and said a couple of things that were kind of fun, kind of interesting.
Starting point is 00:53:52 And I was like the third and I said, well, I've actually been thinking about this because Jessie and I were talking about this last week. And I said that I would turn everything that's bad for me into things that were good for me. And my first mission would be to start eating. And, you know, it- That's the closer.
Starting point is 00:54:14 Yeah, you know, I set it up, I landed the punchline. You sat down. I got some jokes, I sat down, everything's great. Riding high. Then somebody turned the tables. Somebody actually stood up and said, I would have the power to heal and I would heal the world.
Starting point is 00:54:37 Okay. And I was like, uh-oh, this is where this is going? I thought this was fun party conversation. Next thing I know, people are standing up and they are. Crying? No, no, no, no, no. So our friend Mike, smartest guy we know, he actually gave a really hilarious,
Starting point is 00:54:58 yet really like, man, this is a great answer. He stood up and said that he would have the ability to manipulate matter, not on the atomic level, therefore not to induce a singularity, but on the molecular level, and he would take all the carbon that is loose in the atmosphere and send it to the core of the Earth to take care of the global warming problem.
Starting point is 00:55:20 And he explained this in a very scientific way that was pretty awesome. As the things went by, people talked, one person said I would give the power of empathy. I would have the power of empathy and I would be able to give it to people just by having interaction with them. So my answer about just turning fried chicken
Starting point is 00:55:46 into something that was good for me got more and more, you know, sort of shallow, if you will. Vapid, is that the right word? As we proceeded. But I really enjoyed the conversation and then somebody did say, eventually somebody was like screw it
Starting point is 00:56:05 and they went back into fun, fun levels of conversation. But I wasn't with my family, I was with my immediate family but we're talking about extended family when we talk about Thanksgiving, is Thanksgiving better with family? And my mom is sending me pictures of, first of all she's sending me pictures of what the plate of food that she has made looks like and I'm like oh baby.
Starting point is 00:56:30 Yes, this is what I want right now. Proper amounts. It's all you can think about. Proper amounts of butter and sugar. And talk about during structured sharing time. And yeah, if I could have one superpower, it'd be if my mom would be here serving me Thanksgiving dinner.
Starting point is 00:56:48 But I. That may be the answer. Well, I mean, there's something that can't be replicated. There's a connection that you have with your extended family that can't be replicated. There's also a level of like, okay, now you're a little bit tired of each other and you gotta go play cards at a gas station.
Starting point is 00:57:06 But then on the opposite end of the spectrum, there's like, I'm meeting new people, I'm answering this question that a life coach has come up with, and it's probably making new neurons grow in my brain or something. So I don't know, I honestly can't tell you which one is a holistically a better experience. I don't know, I think what you described
Starting point is 00:57:32 sounds like something that if you'd have told me that was February 2nd in LA, maybe you could have been in that type of circle. Oh but then we did karaoke. Oh you did karaoke? The life coach brought in a karaoke machine. Well isn't he a ball of yarn? Is that a saying you just came up with?
Starting point is 00:57:53 Because that sounds like a good saying. It's a saying that cats say if they're in this conversation. Oh. You wouldn't know about that. I'm not interested. He brought in a karaoke machine and everyone ended up singing karaoke,
Starting point is 00:58:04 including my own kids who together sang a Bruno Mars song and I don't wanna say which one it was because you may question my parental intuition. But. The problem is you parent via intuition. You know, it's like, what are you guys? A palm reader?
Starting point is 00:58:28 But, no, but we had a great, first of all, we were there from like two o'clock to 11 o'clock. I mean, it's a long, long frickin' time. A lot longer than you had at your grandma's house. I probably would've ducked out of that too. Once the karaoke machine came out though, you felt like you had to stay. You know. Karaoke on Thanksgiving. that too. Once the karaoke machine came out though, you felt like you had to stay.
Starting point is 00:58:48 Karaoke on Thanksgiving. I don't know, I think that, I'm very thankful that, because I'm like, well, yeah, we didn't go around and say what we're thankful for. No life coach stood up and gave some sort of assignment and I'm like man, maybe that should have been me. Maybe I should have been the life coach.
Starting point is 00:59:09 Yeah well. I regret that a little bit. I mean we had good conversations though. You know and then there was the good, good, good moment. I mean there were lots of great things. There was a baby being passed around for the first time. That's good. It was all types, you know family coming back together.
Starting point is 00:59:24 It was a beautiful thing. Like, I wouldn't change any of it. Again, even the gas station part, which is a highlight. You know, the whole thing, just embracing, just even the parts that feel stagnant. Like, sitting on a couch with all these people and just watching the dog show on mute. Which is the only way to watch a dog show.
Starting point is 00:59:47 Is a beautiful thing. So, I don't know, I think it's, especially when you don't live with them. I'm gonna come down on this. I'm not gonna say, you know, they're both. It could be either. I'm actually gonna come down on this and I'm gonna come down on the side of,
Starting point is 01:00:12 with the caveat of living away from family that you don't see, it becomes that much more important and I think it's, even if nothing changes or it even feels like it doesn't meet your expectations because somehow that's always still a part of it, honestly, going back home for the holidays. There's like this like, man, this is just not what I hoped it would be.
Starting point is 01:00:36 Because you start judging everything and all the conversations and because it's charged with, this is one of the few times that we can all get together. Can't we just make it very special? The answer is not much more special than if you live there but just seeing them, by definition it becomes more special and I'm coming down on that side,
Starting point is 01:01:00 that it's better with family even if it's miserable and again, I didn't describe misery. But I'm saying even if it were that, I think it's better because it's an institution. It's a family institution. But what if you incorporated, I mean next year, if this is gonna be your thing, what if next year, you don't have to say
Starting point is 01:01:21 you're a life coach, but you come with a conversational topic and a karaoke machine. you don't have to say you're a life coach, but you come with a conversational topic and a karaoke machine. Yeah, I could do that. It's like last year at Christmas. You know what I sang at karaoke? We ended up playing that Bean Doozled game and I had like old people eating dirt flavored jelly beans.
Starting point is 01:01:41 It was beautiful. Grass flavored beans. What did you sing? Was it a country song? Nope. Was it... Let me just put it this way. Was it from the 80s?
Starting point is 01:01:56 Yes, and let me put it this way. Was it R&B? The song before it was somebody saying Whitney Houston's I Wanna Dance With Somebody. And I leaned over to the- That's my song. And then I leaned over to the- That's my song. And then I- I would've done that. I leaned over to the life coach slash DJ and I said,
Starting point is 01:02:10 I wanna keep the party going. I wanna keep the dance party going. 80s. I wanna keep this vibe going. And something that I can sing. Something you can sing that's not. Something that I've sung with you. But was it a dance song?
Starting point is 01:02:31 It's not, the word dance is not in the title, but it is a, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You definitely wanna move when you hear it. Is it a Lionel song? Yes. All Night Long? Yes. You sang All Night Long? Yes. All night long? Yes. You sang all night long?
Starting point is 01:02:45 Yes I did. . Man, I, hey jumbo jumbo is what you're supposed to say. Did you get them to sing that? Was everybody like, hey jumbo jumbo? Well some of the people who knew it, I had the, Wait to party, oh we going.
Starting point is 01:03:03 I had the words on the iPhone and so no one else could see them, you know what I'm saying? Like the guy handed me his phone. Oh. The karaoke slash life coach had a phone and he was like giving it to you so you were looking at the lyrics. So I couldn't broadcast it, it wasn't being projected,
Starting point is 01:03:24 it wasn't that level, maybe next year. So where are you coming down on this question? Maybe I took the safe road in terms of family members, but I think that's where I'm at. I feel like if you're isolating, I think a trip back home is, it encompasses more than just the Thanksgiving experience because you're hanging with and seeing these people
Starting point is 01:03:50 that you don't see on a regular basis. So I would say that if you take a look at the whole Thanksgiving holiday, I think that ultimately I'd rather see my family. But I think that if you just give me that isolated, curated, because I feel like I had a curated Thanksgiving experience, and again, there was some, there was some too healthy options that I feel like colored that a little bit,
Starting point is 01:04:17 but like I said, I think I can just take care of that next year and be like, hey, bring, just get some pumpkin pies from the grocery store, make some big thing of mac and cheese, bring the sweet potatoes, you know, just make sure there's enough high-calorie stuff as an option. So you're saying if the, your answer's still about
Starting point is 01:04:35 if the food were just a little better, then it would've been perfect. Oh, you know what, I'll take it back. What about empathy and carbon? Because the food, because the food is such a big part of Thanksgiving for me, I think I gotta be with mama on Thanksgiving if I have to make a choice.
Starting point is 01:04:54 You do. Yeah. Well, we know what we're doing next year. I'll see you at the Sheetz. Well, and the thing is is I'm gonna have an LA, as long as Locke the thing is, I'm gonna have an LA, as long as Locke's playing basketball, I'm gonna have an LA Thanksgiving for the next four years. So, mama gonna have to come out here
Starting point is 01:05:14 and make some food for us. Hey, jumbo jumbo. Oh yeah. We're gonna have a party. You don't even know the words. Oh yeah! We're gonna have a party! You don't even know the words. Yeah well I gotta have the phone. I haven't sung that song enough. I didn't actually sing it all night long one time.
Starting point is 01:05:33 All right so, let us know about your experience. Hashtag Ear Biscuits. Do you love your family? I love my family. That's the question, I do. And then you ended up watching that Tiger and Phil golf thing. Wasted my day doing that.
Starting point is 01:05:56 I was flying, that was Friday, I was flying back. I paid for it. 20 bucks. I would've watched that. I watched it, yeah. That's a good way to watch golf it seems like, I would've done that. I watched it, yeah. That's a good way to watch golf it seems like. I would've done that. I think the consensus was it was a bit of a flop
Starting point is 01:06:09 is what people thought because they're both kinda old and at least Phil considered a little irrelevant now but he beat Tiger so give me a freaking break. Samuel L. Jackson was involved. Charles Barkley was there. He's always a ball of yarn. So anyway, I highly recommend it. I think they should do it again.
Starting point is 01:06:28 I'll watch it again, I'll waste half of my day sitting there on the couch watching golf, watching Tiger Woods breathe heavily into his microphone which was on at all times because it was live streamed. I heard they had to get a lot of refunds because the live stream didn't work right or something. Yeah, they ended up making it free halfway through. But you'd already paid.
Starting point is 01:06:53 Bleacher report, but I'd already paid. You know what, you can keep my money, bleacher report. You did a bold thing. How did this become about that? This is just us talking.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.