Ear Biscuits with Rhett & Link - 176: What Happened Over Break? | Ear Biscuits Ep. 176

Episode Date: January 14, 2019

Vortex tours in Sedona and a watermelon outfit photoshoot in Cabo are just a few of the many adventures that R&L recount in this week's Ear Biscuits. Sponsored By: Turbo Tax: visit TurboTax.com to chat with their tax experts Tommy John: visit TommyJohn.com/EAR for 20% off your first order Article: visit Article.com/EAR for an automatic $50 off of your first order of $100 or more To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This, this, this, this is Mythical. Before we get started, we wanna let you know that Ear Biscuits is supported by TurboTax, which TurboTax was like the first brand sponsor that we had on the internet. But we just did the work for them because it was a contest. Right, they didn't pay us, we got second place. Well, we won second place, we got something for that.

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This week at the round table of dim lighting, we are exploring what happened over break, man? Hey Rhett, what happened over break? I don't know, we haven't talked about it because we wanna talk about it on Ear Biscuits, man. I'ma tell you what happened over my break. This is my 2019 voice, man. Yeah, we're, we.

2019, I'm regressing. Post break. It's syrupy and southerner than normal. Yeah, man, because we did that thing where we've been back, we've been doing a little work, we've been doing some stuff, but we've been holding back our full reports. It's like when you held it in

at Camp Carraway for a week. Right, or every day at school. I mean. You never took a dump at school? I can probably with 98% confidence say never. But for all of my grade school, middle school, and high school, never once did a number two at school. Let me just interject for a second and say,

I did not know this is what the conversation was gonna be. I'm sorry I brought it up. I don't necessarily wanna. That's what I call perfect attendance. But I will say, I didn't make a habit of it. It wasn't like here at work where I'm kinda just like a clock, you know, you have your tea. Oh yeah, I wait to do it here at work

because that gives me something to do here at work because I mean, what else am I gonna do, work? Yeah, but at school, because the facilities are usually semi-public, soiled in some form. Well all the other kids see you sneakers and your pants are on your ankles. You gotta have your dookie shoes.

You take your dookie shoes. Out of your pockets. No, in your backpack. You take your backpack to the stall, you get your dookie shoes out, you put them down, nobody knows it's you. Well I gotta tell Lando that. Yeah, if you had dookie shoes,

you can crap as much as you want at school. None of my kids. Know about the dookie shoes? No because that is not a thing Rhett. Of course they don't know about it. My kids don't either and I didn't make a practice of it but I'd say probably at least a dozen times over my school career I ended up having to drop a load

at school. I mean I'm a person, man. Just a human, 2019. I am a professional anal retentive human. So, I'm sorry to get graphic, but by definition, I'm good at that. You are. Thank you, Rhett.

So I have a. So we got a lot to unload on each other. Yeah, we're gonna move right on from that. So I did a little. And this is for real, by the way. The last time we talked about this, we were, it was before the break and we were joshing. And I specifically,

I did wanna talk to you about your wife because your wife indirectly hurt me over the break. And. I hope emotionally. And you know, okay, so on. I have no clue what you're talking about. I don't know exactly when things happen. I just know that this podcast will be live

for everyone to listen to. After the LTAP. After the LTAP. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where we talked about this. Yeah, so that's what, you mentioned it. You're talking about that photo, I saw the photo and I was like asking about what's wrong with your leg.

I'll give a little more context for the photo shoot later when we talk about our respective trips. But I did have a photo shoot in Cabo San Lucas in which I was wearing a watermelon outfit that we talked about on LTAT. And Link, I was a little self-conscious about it, but Link did point out, what's up with your leg? What is that stripe on your leg? I thought it was your.

Okay, so it was this past Saturday, yeah. I thought, I mean, you were standing on the beach. I just thought was your. Okay so it was this past Saturday, yeah. I thought, I mean you were standing on the beach, I just thought that your leg hairs had like formed a rivulet. Captured the wind. I thought it was like wetness formed a hair rivulet on your right shin. It was a scar. What?

It was a scab that, if you had seen it two or three days before that, it would have been like black scab in that formation. It's your wife's fault. From what I saw of it, it was the rivulet or scab was, I mean it was a good eight inches. Yeah, and a little bit of an S curve. You wanna know how it happened?

No, I won't tell you. You know what? I really don't wanna know. You're not interested. You're not interested. What I'm making up in my mind is probably a lot better. So as you know, we and some of our close friends decided to do Secret Santa.

And the way that it was organized by one of our friends who took the initiative was there was some website, it's not SecretSanta.com but it's something like that and you go and you put everybody into a hat essentially, a digital hat and then you find out who you have to be the Secret Santa for. I can't remember, I would like to remember what it's called but I can't.

If they're a sponsor, I definitely would. I will say that and I do like it because what it's called but I can't. If they're a sponsor, I definitely would. I will say that. And I do like it because when you get your assignment, then you can click on the person and they have the option to put something that they, on their wishlist, something they would like. But only one person did that. Only one person in our group put what they wanted

on their wishlist and it was the person that my wife got the gift from. No, actually my person did too and he said, I just want you to give and he listed out some charities. He said I'd like for you to give to charities in my name and I'm like I ain't doing that. I know who that was. That's not fun.

Yeah. I did give to charity but I also gave him something that was a gift. It was a receipt. Am I giving the, no I gave him something else. So I drew your wife. You got Christy. You can say Christy. I just call her your wife, I drew Christy.

Don't you say my wife's name. And I was actually pretty excited about having your wife as a Secret Santa receiver. But what you didn't know was she also drew your name. No she didn't. Oh she didn drew your name. No she didn't. Oh she didn't? No. Oh I thought she did.

No William did. Oh, I don't know why I thought that, never mind. So. You drew her name and that's all that happened. I drew her name and I was excited about it because as you know and I don't know if we've really discussed this but Christy and I have very similar tastes when it comes to food.

Literally. And like, chances are, and first of all, I kinda like everything, she kinda likes everything, but things very specifically like olives or cheese or things that taste a little bit weird, we tend to agree on those things. Especially the things that her and I disagree on and you and I disagree on, those things together,

you both really like passionately. Right and so I thought, I'm gonna go, this is kind of a fun exercise, I'm gonna go and I'm gonna shop for her as if I'm shopping for myself because if I get things that I would like, then that's kind of getting the things that she would like, right? And so, and this was a day in which I was doing quite a bit.

I'll tell you some other things I was doing that day and other gifts I was getting for people. But it was essentially like, it was like December 23rd, Jessie's parents had been in town and then Jessie's sister and her family were coming into town and there was just a couple of days before Christmas that we had to kinda take care of business and so I kind of went out on my own and did a bunch of last minute shopping.

This is go time. For Jessie, for Christy, your wife, for my kids. Oh. One gift in particular for Shepherd that I'll talk about later. Little something for me maybe. Yeah and of course and your wife being happy is your gift and so I. But you making my wife happy is not my gift.

That's just weird. Now I was talking to my wife, Jessie, to figure out what to get your. Don't you say her name. Your wife, Christy, and, no I was asking her a question because I was like, you know the kinds of things that I like, where should I go to get those things?

Is this like a whole food situation? Mm-hmm. She's like, well, there's this place, I think it's in Pasadena. It's got, they got like kombucha and like fermented things and I think that she'd be really into it. It turns out the place was in like Altadena, I think, I can't remember exactly where it was,

north of Pasadena. And so I go and I see the. Again, if they were a sponsor, you'd know. Yeah, and I see the place. I'm gonna talk a little crap about the place so I don't wanna say the name of the place. But I see the place and it's in one of those situations where it's kind of like a little downtown area

but then there was a Rite Aid Caddy Corner across the street, across the corner with a parking lot but it said for Rite Aid customers only and there was a guy sitting next to his car in a lawn chair and it seemed like he was like the guy that Rite Aid pays to make sure nobody violates the parking situation. I don't know why else he would be there.

It was a little strange. Okay. And I don't know if else he would be there, it was a little strange. Okay. And I don't know if he's like a shop owner or one of the other places, whatever. He had like some, like a bowl of food that he was eating on the back of the car he was sitting next to as well. So he was bound to that location. Yeah.

And so I was like, well I'm gonna pull the old, you know, the old. I'm gonna go to Rite Aid, but Winky Winky. Yeah, I don't, I was trying to come up with a name for it. The Rite Aid Winky Winky. Yeah, so I went into the Rite Aid and went in and. Did you talk to the bowl eater before you went? No, no, no, no, no.

But you parked there is what you're telling me. I parked at Rite Aid, I walked in, I did a loop, and I came back out. Oh, with nothing. Nothing, I was gonna get something like chapstick, something you could always use but there's a line. We have that, we make that ourselves. We make it ourselves, exactly, why do I need that?

So I come back out and then I walk through the parking lot and I walk down to this other place. Turns out they did not have any of the stuff that my wife had basically indicated they might have. They had stuff that you could get fresh made right there, but they didn't have, I thought they were gonna have jars of pickled things and the stuff that I liked that your wife would like, you know,

I wanted to get her some pickled okra. I did end up finding pickled asparagus at Whole Foods later. Bone broth and other things, but I'm a little pissed because I didn't get anything and I've driven. Ooh, strong language. I've driven to Dina of all places and then I come back and I. You could have just gone to Dina.

That's right and then I see. Well you know. What's so wrong with Dina that they had to invent an alternate? I crossed over the road and at this point, I have the choice of walking around the barrier because my car is right there. There's a corner and there's a wall.

And my car is parked right next to the wall. We're talking like a cinder block. Yeah, a concrete wall. Three feet tall. Three feet tall. Three feet tall. And so I'm like, I'm a big man, three feet tall. Three feet tall. Three feet tall. And so I'm like, I'm a big man, three feet's not big for me.

You didn't wanna walk next to the guy with the ball? No, no, no, I didn't wanna walk all the way around the wall and then come all the way through the parking lot. Had nothing to do with the guy because at this point I'm getting my car. It doesn't matter if he knows I did the Rite Aid Winky Winky. He doesn't care anymore. Does he?

Is he gonna get my license plate and send the cops after me? I don't think so. Might not let you leave. So I wasn't thinking about him at all, I was just thinking about efficiency of getting back into my car and actually getting to a store to get your wife what she wanted.

And so I was like, well I'm gonna do that thing where you throw your legs over a fence. It's been years since I've done this though. You know what I'm saying? Okay. And so I get up there. Like a rodeo cowboy. You throw your legs to the side.

Trying to get on a bull. And I put my hands on the wall, throw my legs up. Pommel horse. And then as I make eye contact with the ground on the other side, I realize, oh, it's higher on the other side, this is not an even wall. Oh, snap. Instead of just, 30 feet.

I'm not saying it was, you know, my side was three feet, the other side was four feet. It wasn't this huge drop. But you had to make an adjustment. I had to think. Oh. And in the process of thinking,

You forgot about that trailing leg. I bent my right leg as opposed to keeping it flying over. And in the process, I had jeans on, I had jeans on. Oh God. Just to give you an idea. Good God. My shin hits the top of the concrete and just like the corner of the concrete and like rakes my full body weight, like rakes on it all the way down my shin

or the eight inches or whatever it was that it took. And I land and I'm like, oh no. Oh no, I may have broken my leg. What? The first thing I thought was I may have broken my leg because it was, you know the front of your shin is like really really sharp?

Yours especially. I thought I had like done, I had done something. Thankfully I was able to get into my car, my car was right there. If I had to walk across the parking lot, I don't know if I would have made it. Did you think about calling for Bowman? No, no, I got into my.

Help me Bowman! I think I might have broken my leg. I get into my car. Trying to obfuscate walking past you. I get in my car, shut the door, and I just writhe in pain. I'm like, oh no, oh! I was like, and it wouldn't stop hurting,

and I was like, no, you have not seriously done something serious to yourself. I mean, it was hurting to press the gas and the brake. Did you roll up your pant leg? I couldn't, my pants are too tight. You know what I'm saying, and it was like, my jeans are tight so I'm like pulling them up and they're grabbing onto the flesh that has been scarred

through my jeans. The jeans are ripped. Jeans are fine, jeans are fine. So anyway. And I'd like to think at that point, it's like before you put it in drive, you look up and he's standing there right outside of your door just watching.

I would have no defenses against him. I would have let him arrest me. He's like dude, $20 man. Citizen's arrest. You didn't buy anything at Rite Aid. He would have escorted me into Rite Aid and I would have to get some thrifty ice cream. I'm going with you to get some Chapstick.

You can't fake an injury to get out of this. I ended up getting to Whole Foods and getting your wife some things and she seemed to be very happy. She actually texted me a picture of some of the stuff that she was enjoying. Okay. And I was like great.

Pickled asparagus. Is it good? I did not taste that. And anyway, so a couple of days after this, I noticed my leg has got this massive, like it scabbed up, like I wasn't seriously hurt, it was just a superficial wound, but I got this like, it looked like the Hawaiian Islands. It was like this archipelago, you know what I'm saying,

of just scabby tissue. Okay. That eventually, by the time I got to Mexico, it was falling off. And then when I took my picture, it was just sort of a red streak and it's probably almost gone now. But it's your wife's fault but I think she was happy and I'm happy that she was happy

and it's a small price to pay. Oh man, did I get hurt? You know what, nope I didn't. No injuries for the Linkster over the holidays. I was coasting, man, coasting. I had a wonderful time. I had a moved to tears multiple times time over the holidays and I'll get into all that.

Moved to tears? Yeah. That's quite a teaser. But first we wanna let you know that Ear Biscuits is supported by Tommy John. Now we have all heard every New Year's resolution in the book, but the one you should be focusing on is being comfortable in 2019 with Tommy John,

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or wherever you get your podcasts. Now on with the biscuit. I think there was a, you know, the question was, really how is this gonna play out, us being in Los Angeles for our first Christmases. Yeah we saw each other on Christmas Eve, we got together, we did that dirty Santa thing. Well, secret Santa, dirty Santa different.

Yeah you're right, secret Santa. It wasn't that special. That was something that was unexpected to have a bunch of friends over at my house and we did something that has never been done before, at least in my presence. It wasn't planned, it was weird. You talking about the countdown?

The countdown to the coming in of Christmas. Yeah. To the turn of Christmas, from Christmas Eve to, It was like New Year's Eve, the strike of the new year, but it was Christmas instead. And we had our group of friends and all their kids all together literally. Chanting.

Playing the guitar, chanting. What is the song that, I missed that. The shark. The shark song? Oh gosh it was some like, I can't remember it right now. I don't know what it is. Do you remember the tune of the countdown that we did? Seven minutes, seven minutes.

I don't know about this, I'm out of the loop, man. I'm out getting gifts for your wife. What, the shark song apparently was something that was big. It's a kid's song. Anyway, so we sang that and I went downstairs to the garage and the floor was buckling under everyone jumping up and down and I was like, should I stop the celebration? I mean if they all fall into my garage,

is that still worth it? That was special, man. It was fun. Is it gonna be a tradition? That was what I was thinking as it was happening. I need to get two by sixes in the floor. Of course, you know me, I almost missed it because I was trying to gather up my children

and go home like an hour before. You were trying to get out of there. But I heard all this chanting and I had gathered up my keys and the food leftovers that nobody ate that we brought and I was gathered up and ready to head out the door and get on with the Christmas, getting ready for Christmas morning. Because we had plans.

And then we're about to go out the door and I realized, whoa, this chanting thing is, everybody's all in. And they're singing 14 minutes. At least you knew how long you had. Yes, and I'm like, well, if I can stay for 14 minutes. And then, least you knew how long you had. Yes and I'm like well if I can stay for 14 minutes and then lo and behold like literally every millisecond of that was part of a countdown leading up to it

and we stayed for it and that was amazing. Yeah. So that was a great start. Then we go home and, you know, I'm gonna leave Santa out of this, all right? Understood. None of what I'm talking about has anything to this, all right? Understood. None of what I'm talking about has anything to do with what Santa did at my house.

I'm only gonna talk about the part that me and Christy did. Got it. All right so. The supplemental stuff. Yeah so in addition to anything Santa did or might have done or wanted to do or wished he had done, Christy and I had our own plan that the kids didn't know about that we needed to put into action that night.

I'm pretty sure this was Christy's idea but the moment she said it, we were out on a date, we were like, we gotta, you know, we were talking about, we gotta figure out what we're gonna do. This is our first Christmas here in LA with the kids as opposed to going back home. We gotta start developing some traditions, you know? Like I've been talking about.

And then she pitched this idea. And I immediately knew as she started to pitch it, just jump on board. Don't even analyze it. You know how I have a tendency to like tweak and analyze. Oh really, you have a tendency to analyze? Yeah but I can do this and it would be better or what if we did, I was like, I was just yes man!

It was a brilliant idea. You should do that more often. Just with her. The idea was Christmas morning scavenger hunt. Kids are gonna come down, well we don't have an upstairs. We do but it's just me and Christy's upstairs. All the house is downstairs for everybody else. You know, it's a pecking order here.

So they're all downstairs, so they all, you know they're gonna flow out into, you know, and go to the Christmas tree where all the presents are, and then they're gonna find out, oh, uh-uh, ain't no presents under the tree. The tree was like full of presents under there. So we moved all of them and hid them all around the house,

outside of the house, in the washing them all around the house, outside of the house, in the washing machine, in the grill, in the car, and then we had one bear unwrapped with a card on it and it had the first clue. And boy, we were so excited about it. And then you'd open that up and it was a letter and it was. From the bear? No, a letter from us and it was, it even rhymed, it was a poem that I wrote.

Yeah man. And at the end it had the first clue to find the presents. We were so excited. Of course, ended up staying up till like 2 a.m. That's not something that I do. I'm no elf. But I did it because we were excited. So then we get down there and we're like,

Lando came up to our bedroom first before he went in there and then he woke Lily up, I mean she's 15. Turns out by the time he turned 15, if you don't have to go to school, you could literally sleep. Into the afternoon. For days. Yeah, of course.

Like I don't know, if we don't wake her up, I just don't know when she would ever wake up. And Lincoln knew that he was getting an electric guitar so he wasn't too motivated to get out of bed either. So we get them out of bed and we're like, okay go in there and get the presents and then we're like, watch it and they go in there and they're, you know, it's, ah joke's on you,

the presents aren't here and they're like, kinda groggy and they're like, well. And then Lando's the most excited, I mean he's eight and he's like opening the card and they're reading the poem and like, at point, I expect like celebration. Scavenger hunt! You know, you could have consulted me. What seems obvious to me now is that it's like

Christmas morning, you run downstairs and all the presents are gone and there's nothing but a letter and we have to answer a riddle. So they were a little underwhelmed. Yeah, maybe you should have been a little more, you maybe should have analyzed it a little bit more. Oh I thought you said maybe I should have been

a little more animated. No, no, no. I'm like dude, I was animated. I was like scavenger hunt, guys, yeah! So what ended up happening? Well they had to solve the riddles to get their presents. So by the time they found the third present, they were waking up more, it was kinda like,

there's like a delayed reaction of a scavenger hunt. You get to your third clue, it's like an infusion of caffeine. Really? They kinda got on board. In my experience, scavenger hunts really high out of the gate. You know what I'm saying? And only go downhill from there. I think that they saw the look on my face

of disappointment and still hope and expectation that this, let's just do this for Dad. Yeah, wow, okay, so is this a tradition? But they got into it. And when they found the present, they were still wrapped, by the way. Well, yeah, okay, so is this a tradition? But they got into it, and then, so, and when they found the presents, they were still wrapped, by the way. Well, yeah, of course.

And so then they would take the presents and they would put them in a pile or like separate them and then they would. After a while, at what point did it become more of an Easter egg hunt? Do you have to follow the clues? You gotta follow the clues. But you know, oh, maybe one's in the washing machine.

I think there were 10, there were 10 locations, okay. Total. Yeah total. They worked as a team to get everyone's presence. They worked as a team so each location would have multiple presence, like one for each kid kind of thing. And so they came around to it and then I really think it's about now next year, yes it is a tradition,

we are gonna do it and they're gonna be emotionally prepared. But you're gonna hire a scaven, we are gonna do it and they're gonna be emotionally prepared. But you're gonna hire a scavenger hunt company to do it. Right, you're not gonna do it yourself. What do you mean? You don't think, my clues were lit like a tree, man. So we're gonna do that. So then they, so then we were back to square one,

they were opening the presents and then we were proceeding from there and it was good to go. And we actually both got our kids an electric guitar. You got Lincoln one, I got Locke one. Now I went with Locke so he could pick it out. Yeah. So Lincoln had already seen his guitar.

We picked out the guitar that he wanted. He wanted a Telecaster form. Of course I'm not gonna get him an actual Telecaster. I'm gonna like the preliminary version of the Telecaster, the Squire Telecaster. He's gotta prove himself before he moves to the big leagues. Did you, when you were at the guitar shop, did you see the Jaguar?

The Fender Jaguar, same thing? It's like a Squire version. The cage had an apron over it, what? No. That's what we ended up getting. What? Jaguar. Jaguar.

Is it made by Fender? Yeah, it is a shape that you would recognize that is a little different. Like a Jazzmaster? No, it's just a different shape. It's got a few more bells and whistles, not that it necessarily does anything. It's all the same price, they're all in that Squier range.

But I knew that you had gotten the Telecaster. I'm thinking about turning my garage into a, like a garage band site. Yeah like that, that's what it looks like. Yeah that's the Jazzmaster body. Okay, same thing then, but it says Jaguar in it. Cool colors. We almost got that one, but that one was more expensive.

I'm sure people know more than me and they're probably wrong. So we got like a candy apple red one. And you got him an amp. I'm thinking about turning the garage into a, yeah, got an amp. Which amp did you get? Fender.

The one that has the stuff built into it, like the sounds, like the, yeah. Yeah, yeah, I think. Probably got the same amp. It was like 100 bucks. It could've, okay, I got a better amp. Oh, you did? Oh, I guess he had it.

It wasn't that much more expensive, but it wasn't 100 bucks. Maybe I got the same ant, but I just got a better deal. Okay, all right. Yeah, but you're gonna turn your. Did you hide it? No. Well, there you go. No, I didn't hide it.

But the most exciting gift that I got was for Shepard though, because Shepard, as you may recall, on the Good Mythical More. Well in the episode we went over the fill in the blank on Christmas list but then in Good Mythical More they went over their list. And I watched that back. We watched that back as a family

because I was like Shepard have you watched the show that you were on yet? He was like no. This was like a week after it had been out. And so we sat down, Jesse and Shepard and I, and watched Shepard on the show. And then we watched Good Mythical More and that was when I realized that,

oh, you know when he went through his Christmas list, like that was actually a real thing. It wasn't just for entertainment purposes. That's the way I think about the show. It's like we had these conversations and sometimes it's like,, oh there's no real world application for this. We said we're gonna do this but we're not.

Right, you don't really like wood. Exactly. So I... Hold on. Okay, just tell me, because I remember what he said. He said he wanted a snake. I remember, did you get him a, because I remember what he said. He said he wanted a snake. I remember, did you get him a snake? I got him a snake.

Well, because Jessie was like, he was like, she saw him mention snakes, she was like, oh, you still want a snake? Like he'd been talking to her about how he wants a snake. And so, I don't. Because I kind of thought Shepherd was just being Shepherd when he said he wanted a snake. No, no, I don't mind snakes.

And I thought that this might be an opportunity for him to get a little responsibility or something to have to take care of the snake. So, I'm sure the snake appreciates that. Learn responsibility or kill a snake. Well, you know, I mean, you gotta weigh the pros and cons here.

It's not a mammal. I'm gonna step in and take care of this cold blooded animal as needed. You got a snake. Yeah, so we got a, so first of all. How you wrap a snake? Well the first snake, we did wrap, no I'm just kidding. No so you don't wrap a snake but what I did do is I went to

No, so you don't wrap a snake, but what I did do is I went to the pet store here in Burbank that we got Craig from, actually. Really? The one they try to take Craig back to. Because this place has a bunch of reptiles. Great pet store. Scales and Tails, I'll shout them out. Not a sponsor.

Not a sponsor, but. Of anything, probably. It's basically the place in Burbank to get pets, but definitely get reptiles. And sort of exotic pets and that kind of thing. So I go in there and I have my mind set on a corn snake. In the little bit of reading I have done that corn snakes are great for your first snake and you can get

these weird colors and stuff. We got the, I think they call it the Okeechobee mutation, which makes them, they're like orange and red. Okay. That's a mutation. Not normal. You say, when you get your first snake, as if you plan on getting more snakes. No, I mean, this is the first and probably the last snake,

but I'm saying I didn't wanna get something that you have to think about a whole lot. It's not that big around. It's like as big around as my thumb, right? Yeah, but they can go to six feet long. Really? But more likely four feet long is what this thing would be. They're fast too, aren't they?

Yeah, and it's a lively snake. They can get away in the house. They like to be handled and that kind of thing. Or get away. Yeah, I mean they could get away, but we know the protocol. But I had to come here. I actually had to come here

to like put, because they just give you the snake in a little plastic, like something you'd get takeout at a restaurant with, that's what they put the snake in. I was like, I'm not interested in eating the snake. He's like, no, this is how we transport the snakes. Little paper towel and some holes in this little plastic. Like a wonton. Yeah, and then they give you the whole setup

and you got your heat lamp and there's a pad underneath. You have a hot side and a cold side, there's water, all that. I came here to do all this on Christmas Eve. No, no, two days before Christmas. And so the snake, who Shepard ended up naming Moose, by the way, Moose the snake. That's cool.

Was in our office, sealed up. You know, he couldn't get out of the terrarium. But I'm just gonna talk to you about the disturbing side of reptile ownership because this is something that I had not anticipated but I kinda understood. I mean, I know. I think I understand. It's called just having a snake.

That's disturbing enough. No, no, no. It gets dark. It's gonna get dark. Er. So again, I don't mind the snake. He seems almost kinda cute. First of all, we don't know if it's a male or a female.

Apparently, finding out the sex of the snake involves a probe of some kind. You gotta kinda be like an expert. It's not just like you just turned over and look at it. And so even the guy was like, I don't know if it's a male or a female, and I'm not, and the implication was, and I'm not about to find out for you.

So we just went with moose. It could be a male or female. We don't plan on breeding it. There are male and female meese. And so, but I'm like, so what do I feed it? So oh, you feed it pinkies. Pinkies. Four of us, two hands.

The smallest finger on each of my hands. Eight McLaughlin pinkies. That's not gonna last long. He's like, these baby mice. There's no alternatives? Like baby hairless mice. So the dude proceeds to, and listen, if you are like super animal lover,

you may wanna skip this part. Because basically they have mice, live mice, in the pet store at different stages. And he's like, he reaches in, he reaches in, he's like, this is what you're gonna start feeding him. And he just pulls out this little teeny baby mouse that has no hair on it, that looks like just something that just popped out of, like a little preemie looking thing.

Like can't even see and he's like yeah, you're gonna take it, you're gonna put it in the bag with the snake, now then he says, but you can get frozen. I was like yes I want frozen! So first of all, I wasn't gonna deal with the live situation which technically a lot of people, including this guy, said that if you wanna be safe, you give them frozen from the beginning and frozen from then on out

so that they can't get injured because a mouse will bite a snake as it's going down and injure the snake. Okay, okay, okay. But these people, just so you understand. I wasn't in the market for a snake. Why are you trying to talk me out of it? No, no, no, because I just want you to understand the reality.

People who have, and I don't know why I've never thought about this, but people who have snakes, he's like, as it gets older, you're gonna wanna continue to go up. He's like, there's pinkies, and then there's, he called them like softies or something, or fluffies, and then he's got small mice and then large mice, okay and Craig also eats frozen mice as well.

So we're doing all frozen here but these are just mice that is bred in order to be given to reptiles. This was our happy holiday episode. No no, get this over with. But the interesting thing is is that on the like Get this over with. But the interesting thing is is that on the like, you know, animal ethics scale, you've got these more developed mammals.

Yeah, yeah, like I said earlier, it's not a mammal. More closely related to us. They actually have, you know, another part of their brain that like gives them the opportunity to process thoughts on a different level and to enjoy bonding and this stuff. And we're feeding it to the lower life form, the snake, because this is the way that the world works. There are no vegan snakes.

And so then I was like, does this mean that there are no vegan snake owners? Or if a vegan snake owner has a snake, they're just like, well, I'm not eating the mice. He's eating the mice. I don't understand the ethics of it. Let the snake snake. I'm not a vegan, I understand that we're all

part of the food chain, I understand that this is what snake ownership involves, but I'm not gonna deal with the live ones, I'm gonna deal with the frozen ones and I really don't wanna know what happens before that. You gotta microwave them before you throw them in the cage? You can but you shouldn't. You just set it out and let it thaw. If you microwave it, it's uneven and it can get hot

in certain places, it can injure your snake. Okay. So what I do is I take the snake, I put it into, this is what this guy says, you put it into a little brown bag with the thawed mouse once a week. You basically fold it closed, put it back in his cage so he eats in a different environment so that he does not get the idea that I eat in this terrarium, because then you might

stick your hand in there and he thinks it's a snake, thinks it's a mouse and eats it. A pinky, he thinks a pinky's a pinky. Eventually as the snake gets bigger, you're gonna have to have a feeding, like if you got a huge snake, like a 20 foot snake, you gotta have a feeding bin, you know? And then in that point you're like giving it a rat to eat.

The guy, I saw somebody, I was in line. A woman comes in, she's like, I want one of the large rats. The guy reaches in the fridge, pulls it out, holding it, it's just a dead rat. And that's like a couple times a year for that, for that big snake though, I think. No. Maybe every 10 to 14 days.

I don't know, but mooses once a week. My Christmas is over and you ruined it. It's just the reality, man. It's the circle of life. Where's Elton John when you need him? It's after everybody got their presents open. Everybody's playing their new guitars and Lando's loading up his gumball machine.

He asked for a gumball machine. We got that. Oh, really? No mice in there. But you could probably put the little pinky mice in the little balls. That would be kind of cool. We could put that in Shepard's room and that's where he gets the mice. That's where the corn snake crawls the little balls, that would be kinda cool. We could put that in Shepherd's room

and that's where he gets the mice. That's where the corn snake crawls up inside. Put the corn snake in the, In the gumball machine. That'd be cool. That could be weird. That's a cool terrarium. Yeah. We did not get Lando a claw machine like he asked for

because of the reasons that I told him. Yeah, that would be overkill. And then, you know, in the effort to further traditions, they're like, Lily's gonna make a meal, she made this beef stroganoff meal for our dinner and we're all sitting down at the table, like gathered around eating our meal. This is the evening, Christmas evening by this point.

And we're sitting down and we're eating this meal that my daughter prepared, it's fabulous, everybody's happy, it's got their stuff. I just find myself weeping at the table. Like I literally found myself weeping tears of joy at my table. Here's the thing though is that 20 years from now,

the estrogen is really gonna be getting produced. Yeah. At that point, you will, many men find themselves weeping for no reason at all. Nothing but weep. You're getting started at 40. Yeah. You just need to, you gotta pace yourself a little bit. It kinda caught the fam off guard a little bit

and I think Christy knew what was happening and maybe she teared up a little bit, maybe she gave me a pat on the shoulder. Yeah. But the realization I was having was just tremendous gratitude for this family. I mean, you got these people who are, they're their own people but like we, you've got these people who are, they're their own people but like we, you know, they,

we made them in a certain sense and, you know. Well I think specifically it was the first time in a long time that we had our own Christmas thing and it was that we had our own thing for the first time that was distinct from the rest of our family. I mean, we missed them, we missed our family not being there but, and I was a little sad about that and we did talk to them and do video chats

throughout the day and stuff like that. But I realized that I actually felt very much, I realized that I actually felt very much, very fatherly for the first time and I started thinking about traditions. Feeling fatherly. Because when the rest of your family's there, when your parents or maybe older siblings or other extended family is there,

relationships go up and they go down in time. But when it was just us, I was the, you know, I was the only father around. So it was a very different feeling that kind of snuck up on me that's like we have a thing. And I think that it was something that my family, like my, that encouraged us to do our own thing. I think they knew better than I did that it was something that my family, like my, that encouraged us to do our own thing. I think they knew better than I did that it's like,

yes, you need to have this sensation. And I realized that I just had not had it. And when I realized that I was having it, I started to cry. And it was very, I was very happy. Does this mean that you're gonna, like this is Christmas now? Like you're not gonna be home again?

I don't, yeah I don't know. I mean we, as long as Locke keeps playing basketball, we have to be here. So I don't have a choice for four years but. It was, I mean at this point, we haven't talked about that specifically so I don't know exactly. Well it sounds like it was pretty moving.

It was very moving so yeah, that is a big tick in the yes column of let's do this again, let's continue to build on this. Well I will say I teared up at the Christmas meal but it was because I nearly burned the house down and it was just the smoke coming from the oven. What? Yeah, but it was beef the smoke coming from the oven. What? Yeah.

But it was beef. I'm sure this was my wife's fault, so go for it. But it wasn't beef stroganoff, it was beef wellington. Oh, that's not easy. Well so, Jessie's parents had been in town. They left, we had a couple of days, we kinda did some just us McLaughlins thing.

And then Jesse's sister and her family, so husband and two boys, about high school age boys, so a little older than Locke, we're gonna come stay. But they flew in on Christmas Day. And so we're like, okay, well we're gonna prepare Christmas dinner and so we can all have it together when they get there. And Jessie and I, we fancy ourselves as culinarily skilled

although we're not but we're adventurous. And we were like well she's, well I'm gonna do these Cornish hens because we do Cornish hens every year as our Christmas dinner before we go back home. But now we're gonna make it the Christmas dinner. But I was like, what if we tried beef Wellington? Ever since I watched that first season of Hell's Kitchen and heard Gordon Ramsay talk about it,

I had this idea of how awesome it would be to make beef Wellington. So we made all of them at the same time. It's ambitious. all of them at the same time. It's ambitious. We ended up, we couldn't put all of it in the oven at the same time, so we ended up putting the hens directly on the grate in the oven

and then I put these drip pans underneath it and then everything was dripping off of the Cornish hens and it was smoking up the house and the fire alarm kept going off and it was freezing, as you know, fire alarm kept going off and it was freezing. As you know, for LA it was freezing on Christmas Day. In the 40s, can you believe it? Which is super cold to us at this point

because we've adjusted. So I got all the windows and doors open. I did tear up a little bit but again, it was because of the smoke and the ice. There were no flames though, just smoke. No, no flames and actually the meal. Was there yelling? The meal, Jessie and I, yeah, a little bit.

Christmas Day yelling. I mean it's not. Hey that's part of it, man. It's not Christmas if you're not yelling at each other. Yeah, it's part of it. And the meal was really good. It ended up being great. Nothing was burned, it was just the drippings

had created the smoke situation. Okay. I don't know if I'm gonna make that, the smoking up the house a tradition. But it is the kind of thing that becomes a tradition. You know, like you tell the story of the time the whole house got smoked up and then like 400 years later like there's like a dude with incense and he's like,

we light this incense in honor of the time Rhett and Jesse McLaughlin nearly burned their house down. Like that's how traditions start. It's always something stupid. That sounds more like a religion. Oh did I tell you I'm starting a religion? Yeah that's different. That's 2019, the year I started religion.

And then, so then I embarked on my trip to. I don't wanna get, just really quickly. Okay. Because I had everybody, I had every, I had family there for those two different periods of time and I learned something about my dog. I'll show a picture at the appropriate time here on the feed.

But my dog is unfaithful. Barbara is unfaithful. Oh well I knew that. You know that Barbara seeks attention from whoever is there but when Jessie's parents were there, she slept in the bed with Jessie's parents. And of course Jessie's whole family, they're all dog people, they don't care,

they love her, they think she's incredible. Yeah. So it's not like, if Barbara tried to sleep with my parents it would be a little different. But so Barbara is like sleeping with the enemy. Not the enemy but. Oh you, oh you said it, you said it. And sleeping with Jessie's parents

and then sleeping with Jessie's sister and her husband and even going to the point of getting in their suitcase. I have a picture, I'll show it now. This is Barbara in, for those of you who are watching the podcast. Like trying to. I don't know if she's trying to send the message I wanna go home with you, I hate it here,

because she seems to love us as well. Because what she'll do is she'll spend all night down there and then in the morning she'll come and get and start scratching at our door and then wants to come in and just make out with me. You know what I'm saying? I'm not making out with you right now. You've been making out with other people downstairs.

It's not time for that. But you did let her in. Yeah I do, I can't help it. She also wore a sweater pretty much the entire holiday season. Oh festive. Yeah it was just, I don't know,. She also wore a sweater pretty much the entire holiday season. Oh festive. Yeah it was just, I don't know, one day she just had a sweater on.

What did she think about the snake? Does not care about moose at all. Well doesn't bark at him, doesn't look at him, doesn't sniff him. Shepherd brought him down Christmas day holding him. Barbara doesn't care. We were wondering if she was gonna freak out and like try to attack him.

Did Barbara see the snake? Yeah, she seemed to but she didn't seem to care about it. Maybe she was friends with a snake in a previous life. I don't know. Now if she gets in the aquarium with a snake, I know that's not what it's called but whatever. Terrarium. Then you're really being cheated on.

Like you should really take that personally. She's curled up with a snake. She might try. So after Christmas, we went to Sedona, Arizona because again, like I said last Ear Biscuit, we decided not to do the RV thing, we wanna get there quick. The place that I found, it had a great view out the window

of the red rocks that are signature for Sedona. Unfortunately, we couldn't take Jade because they wouldn't allow her in this place and that was my one regret, that Jade was not with us. But this place, I mean, a lot of friends had told us about it and they talked it up and that's why I wanted to go and I knew there was a lot of good day hiking

and I'm still trying to foster the love for the nature with my family and taking nature walks, I don't call them hikes because it's like we've talked about before, my kids have decided they don't think they like to hike. So you just call it something else. And it works? Or just don't tell them you're doing it.

Just tell them, oh we're walking to the car but we're gonna take an alternate route. And then lo and behold we're out here in nature for three hours and they're loving it. So that was my vision. You could do a scavenger hunt out there as well, just so you know. I mean.

They'd be pretty fun outdoors. This is a, you could do a spiritual scavenger hunt because this place is like, I mean, call it new agey, okay? In the 70s, there was some psychic woman who went there and said, oh, this is a hotbed of spiritual earth energy activity and there are, because you go in and it's a two lane road that kind of goes through into kind of a valley

that then you're driving past these red rock formations on either side of the road and it's absolutely breathtakingly beautiful, it's like. Is this where Red Rocks the Theater is? No, no. Where John Tesh played? No, but it is the same type of rocks, I do believe. You know, the iron content,

you got like a rust situation going on. And the erosion exposes these amazing looking formations. There's one natural bridge called Devil's Bridge that you can hike to. I ended up not going for weather reasons. So I'll have to go back but I mean it's absolutely beautiful so in the 70s it was determined to be this place where there's a lot of spiritual energy going in

and coming out of the earth in places called vortexes. Vortexes. Which we learned about vortexes back when we went to Tonopah, Nevada as part of Commercial Kings where we made a tourism ad for them for that episode and I'm still reasonably proud of that episode and I saw the sign for Tonopah when we were driving. Tonopah has a vortex.

That's what they say, right? Yeah. We ended up, you know, so there's a lot of, it's very hippie, spiritual, so you got the beautiful scenery, lots of people hiking, lots of shops with lots of crystals where each crystal does something special. Other than just sit there and be a rock.

Right. Right. And there's four vortexes. There's four? Yeah. So Donna's got four. She's got four. How many Cheesecake Factories does it have?

Zero. Wow. So weigh that. Okay, all right. And we signed up for a Jeep tour for one day, but as I was looking for that, there was also a Vortex tour that I thought about taking where the description was written by the one tour guide

who said, if you have a party of four or less, you meet me at this gas station and you can get in my car and I will drive you to the vortexes. You can experience a male vortex, a female vortex, and general spiritual goodness. If you have a party of five or more, I'll get in the car with you and we'll do the same. So at that point I just,

I didn't pursue that one any further. How big around is a vortex? Well. I'm thinking about how big the party is I'm gonna take. Right. Do we all get in one at a time or do we all, does the whole group get in and can you feel it? It's not a whole.

No, it's like a tornado. It's like a spiritual tornado. It's pretty big. Like for one, there's a rock called Bell Rock, which is pretty freaking big, but you can, if you were physically capable, you could hike up to the top of the bell in an hour, okay? So that gives you an idea how big it is. It's shaped kind of like a bell.

We hiked this. it is a vortex. The entire formation. Is a vortex. Is a vortex. Okay. That's all I can say about it. You didn't feel it? Did you feel it?

I felt joy being there, I felt exhilaration and a little fear climbing up because Lando kept wanting to climb up and I kept saying, climbing up's easy, buddy. It's the climbing down that's difficult. But in a vortex, you don't have to worry about gravity. That's what he said. Oh.

And I was like, nope, I'm not buying it. So every so often, I would make him crawl ahead and then prove to me that he could crawl back down and the rest of the family had long since bailed on this entire. They didn't go up into the vortex? We went halfway up the bell and then we went another third of the way up. Beautiful place, just can't, I have nothing more to say

about a vortex, I don't know, I just didn't experience anything, I should've signed up for the tour. You weren't open. I should've got. You were closed. We should've got the woman in our tour. You weren't open. I should've got. You were closed. We should've got the woman in our car. You have to open your heart in the same way that the vortex is open and you need to understand it.

We did have a couple of magical experiences. The first one, we get there that night, we're eating pizza and the employees at the place say, oh look, there's a snow flurry. It's the first of the season. Was it going in a vortex pattern? It was not. That would have been important for me.

They went outside and it's like wow, they actually don't get a lot of snow there. Because I was reading online, it's like if you're hiking, you might be lucky and there might be a dusting of snow on the red rocks which can be beautiful. Turns out Lando had never seen, he didn't realize this, he had never seen natural falling snow. You know, because we've been out here since he was,

before he was two years old and he hasn't seen snow fall except for man made at a ski resort last year this time. That was special but then the next day I take him out hiking or on a nature walk, wink wink, and it starts snowing and we went on a hike, dude, in the snow and it was awesome. I mean it was like. This is where I saw some of the Instagrams

from your family, right? Yeah, it's like nothing, I mean it's like, you could go your whole life and not hike in snow falling on the red rocks, especially in Sedona from what I've heard, it was pretty special, we had a blast. You didn't cry then? I had a little tear action.

And there was no beef stroganoff involved? No, not at all. Because you need to isolate what the trigger is. Trying to correlate what it is. If it's not beef stroganoff, maybe it's just being with your family and having good times. Well how sad is that?

It's gotta be something else. Two days, the next day we took a Jeep tour which turned out to be actually kinda lame but you can rent Jeeps there and do like extreme aggressive off-roading. Which a lot of places you can't do that. So that's another cool thing about that if you wanna go to Sedona, not a sponsor.

Sedona, not a sponsor. Entire town, not a sponsor. The next to last day we're there, it starts snowing. We go out for brunch and this is an unexpected snow and it's dumping snow. By the time we come out an hour and a half later, we had driven four minutes to eat brunch. We come out, we get back in the car,

it's like seven inches of snow. It's crazy. It was amazing. It took us over two hours to drive the four minute drive back to our condo because the place just wasn't ready for it and it shut down. And we drove for an hour, we didn't move hardly any and I was like, all right guys ready for it and it shut down. And we drove for an hour, we didn't move hardly any and I was like all right guys, get out and just walk home.

And they had a blast just kind of walking home in the snow blast and I had some alone time with my Vortex. That sounded weird, I was just in the car listening to. Yeah I understood. But I listened to like. Vortex music like spa music. It was really. You gotta get everything in line.

It was really, and then so we get back home, have some coffee, I finally get there and the sun's going down, I'm like we can hike back up this trail from our condo and Lando and I went out there and that's the picture that I showed in LTAT that I got him to take of me and I get up there to the top and dude, I swear, this is when I cried again.

I was like, Lando, this is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. It was snow on this trail and a view of the Red Rocks and like it was as quiet as Christmas Eve before Santa. And I called Christy, I was like, you bail on this but you have to get dressed and you have to hike up here and see this and she came up there and she was like tearing up, it was so beautiful up there and so quiet

and she was like, this is like Narnia. I thought about you and your obsession with Narnia. Dude, I went to. Did you find a lamp post? I went to winter Narnia, no lamp post. What was at Narnia, I thought about you and your obsession with Narnia. Dude, I went to Winter Narnia, no lamp post. Wasn't Narnia. Took lots of photos in my like. Did you find any goat tracks? No.

Okay, it wasn't actually Narnia, I get it. But just one set, just a set of two because that was his, because he had his half goat. I mean, the entire thing, I was just struck with, for my family, I try to adopt this mentality, but then I'm trying to apply it to life in a New Year's resolution type way. It's just trying to, and maybe we've talked about this,

but to set up, you can't create moments like that or all the moments that we had, the tear up moments, but you can set the table for something memorable to happen, for the place to get filled up with smoke, so to speak. You know, and it's just, there's an art to saying, okay, I can't force this but I can set the table for something amazing. We can go here, we can go to this place and do a walk

and maybe the snow will dump. Maybe something magical will happen. We're just gonna be here and be open to it. It would be a totally different trip if it hadn't snowed. And I, you know, I can't say it's not related to the vortex. But the vortex isn't at your house.

Why not? Maybe you have a't at your house. Why not? Maybe you have a vortex at your house. Maybe I do. Maybe vortexes make you cry. Maybe they do. I had a slightly different experience. No snow in Mexico. Well.

Cobblicious. I enjoyed being with the family that we had in town. Uh-huh. But I have a certain capacity for just people in my house. Regardless of how well we're getting along and the fun that we're having. I get it. We had a great time.

As families, we watched a lot of movies. I saw Bird Box, suddenly all the memes made sense. Saw Aquaman, I watched my wife watch Jason Momoa. And that was interesting but then I got to take in Amber Heard in sort of a similar way, which I had license to do that. Oh. In her aqua suit or whatever it was. I heard that.

And then, so we saw movies but by the end of it, I was kinda like, I am, I kinda need, and I knew this, and this is why I planned this trip to Cabo with just Jessie, I was like, I'm gonna need some time to myself and just me and my wife after having everybody in town. So we went down to Cabo, just for like four days,

and had a very relaxing time. Actually ended up working, but I don't call it work because you know, like writing songs and working on some other things that we can't talk about. But stuff that you could do next to a pool in sort of a relaxing fashion. And I got the, and did the photo shoot,

which you know, I'm very proud of. Well you gotta fill the listeners in because they don't know what the photo shoot is. I don't think you said that at the top. No, yeah so when we got to this place, they were orienting us to what was the options and the place and they were like, oh there's a complimentary photo shoot.

I knew that by complimentary photo shoot they meant somebody's gonna take photos of you and then charge you a lot of money for the photos that they took. It's not really complimentary. So the shoot is free but the photos are expansive. But Jessie had gotten me this watermelon bathing suit in matching watermelon shirt, almost as a joke, not ever thinking

I would wear them together. I've worn them both independently. I think I wore the watermelon shirt on the show at one point. But I put the whole package together. If there's any place to do it, it's Kavo. And I was like, this is what I'm wearing for the photo shoot, what are you wearing?

So Jessie and I took some photos together but then I was like, obviously I gotta get something by myself, I mean this is kind of a special outfit. Okay, now tell me why that was obvious. Just because, I mean, you saw the photo. I think I created a vortex in Cabo. Oh gosh, give me a break. I don't know how the vortexes happened

but if there was not a vortex around me while I had that watermelon suit on on the beach, then I don't believe in vortexes. Oh gosh. And the interesting thing was is, you know me, of the two of us, I'm the one that is a little more worried about what people think.

And also I'm always, I'm very overly, irrationally sensitive to how big I am. I'm just a very large person so I kinda feel like if I do anything, if I get out there and dance, whatever I do, you're gonna see me do it because you can't miss me, right? Right. And so I have this.

And you're not even factoring in being covered in watermelons. Right, and so I'm like, I gotta put this watermelon thing on, I'm gonna walk all around this resort. You're getting cold feet on us. No, I knew I was gonna do it, but I couldn't just relax into it.

I wanted to just relax into my identity as the guy who wears the watermelon outfit. I just wanted to be that guy. But as I'm getting that picture taken, all the people who are eating breakfast at the restaurant that overlooks the beach are just like looking at me like, look at this douche. You know what I'm saying?

This guy obviously thinks that this is cool and I wanna be able to be like, I know that this is funny! I don't know why and I told Jessie, I was like, that's my New Year's resolution, is just to quit caring. Quit caring about what people think. Create your own vortex.

Be your own vortex. That's what my t-shirt says. But Photoshop the leg wound after. I will add that. No but you know what, that's all part of the story though. It's all part of the story. And you know, that's the, and by the time this is out, that picture will be on my Instagram as well.

I mean shout out to RedMC on Instagram, haven't done that in a while but you know what, there's a vortex happening over there on Instagram right now and you can be a part of it. Maybe if you double click that picture, you'll create your own vortex right there with your thumb. I don't know how the internet works, but if you wanna get into my vortex,

create your own vortex, we'll have just a web of vortexes, maybe the whole world will become a vortex and it starts with going over to RedMC and liking that photo. Sorry. going over to Red MC and liking that photo. Sorry. So that was kind of, I mean, it's kind of selfish, I realize that, I mean, especially contrasted

with how you wept, you wept in the presence of your family. For me, I think my holidays really just comes down to that single photo of me in the watermelon skin. Yep. Oh gosh. No, I had an incredible time with my wife. It was, we needed the time, even though it was just a few days.

I got offered Coke on the streets of Cabo by at least seven people. Like Diet Coke? It was the Diet Coke and the Cherry Coke and just Coke Classic, Coke Zero. They had every kind of Coke that you could imagine. How was it? I didn't trust it.

I just didn't trust it and so I didn't say yes to that. Okay, for the record, you said no to the Coke. I said no, I am not interested in that. But one of the more notable things that I'll never forget and it's one of those things that there's these things that happen to you and then they become part of your personal canon whenever you interact with an object and let me explain.

We have some of these things between the two of us. I'm at the pool and I order a quesadilla. You know it's like poolside restaurant they'll bring you whatever you want. Yeah. Great service, whatever. Love it. And they bring me a quesadilla

and the guy comes and sets it down and it's you know it's sort of the half moon, it's the folded over tortilla as a quesadilla is pretty recognizable food product. Okay. And an old man walks by, comes up and he's like, what do you call that? Really? Yes, he's like,

what do you call that? And I was like, a quesadilla. And he was like, and instead of saying like, oh, I didn't know it was quesadilla. And he was like, and instead of saying like, oh I didn't know it was quesadilla, like he was like, huh. And then he goes over and starts talking to his wife and like, they discovered, I introduced someone to a quesadilla.

You'll never believe this thing. And so then. And you'll never believe how they spell it. So again, now this is what I'm getting at, this whole personal canon thing, which is one of the things I love about life. So then when Jesse and I are at the airport getting ready to leave Cabo,

and because we have a certain credit card, we get into this lounge area, right? Oh, I know what they had. And they had a quesadilla and I bring it back and put it, I got it on my plate and I'm like, what do you call this? You had a little laugh. Yeah, had a little laugh.

Had a little shared. And so now for the rest of my life, any time I'm with my wife and we order a quesadilla, one of us is gonna say, what do you call that? That's couple cannon. Yeah, couple cannon, man. You got a couple cannon quesadilla. Yeah, that's it.

Create your own vortex. That's the thing about relationships. Hey, we're 18, 19 years into marriage, add a couple of years when dating. It's like you gotta keep adding to the couple canon. Yeah, you got to. You know, and quesadillas are so prevalent. That's good. That's a good reminder of that moment.

Not where that man's from. Don't go except where that guy's from. Now, not a sponsor, one of the last things that I'd like to do is this was the present that my wife got for me which is, she thought I would like a 360 camera. She was right. Oh.

Jacob, Kiko, I warned Kiko about this. I'm gonna take, I'm taking a picture. Jacob wore his pants with his knees out. He's like, oh my knees are out. I hope this is gonna work. I'm gonna take a 360 degree photo of our studio right now and then I'm going to, where can you post 360 degree photos? Just take it.

I'm gonna tweet out wherever you can get this. Do you have to rotate it? No, you take it, photos? Just take it. I'm gonna tweet out wherever you can get this. Do you have to rotate it? No, you take it, one, two, three. That was it, huh? It's like Men in Black. I think you can chop them up and put them on Instagram. Oh really?

Chop them up on Instagram. Well, you better believe it. If it can be on Instagram, it will be. Shout out to Red MC. If not, I'm gonna tweet it out. All right, well, man, so we've caught up. Here we are, holiday's caught up, we got 2019 is just bustling out before us

and let's walk that red carpet, shall we? Together, every week, we're gonna bring you another Ear Biscuit. Let's go through 2019 together. Bring your friends along. Go to iTunes or wherever you're listening. Could be Spotify, I don't know, wherever else. Leave a review.

Now all that stuff helps, but bringing people into this world of friendship and honesty, laughs, tears. The friendship vortex. All of it. That might be the subtitle for 2019 of This Ear Biscuits. Do it. Thank you for hanging out with us.

I mean, shoot, Conan's got a podcast now. Yeah, I mean. I mean, the competition's getting stiff. Right. I don't know what's gonna happen. You probably shouldn't have even mentioned his. Yeah. Take it back. We take it back, he doesn't have a podcast. No, he doesn't. Don't go looking for it.

We'll talk with you next week. Only us. Or at least us first, I don't know. One of the other things I did, I didn't get to, I'll just tell you. we were eating dinner in Sedona in the place and I was playing music, I was playing like Lord Huron and I was like, when, I was just thinking a lot about the kids

when they get older and I was thinking like, you know, 20 years from now, I'm 60, like I would love to know that I could like rent a place and have the family come back and I was like, I was saying this, I was like, I would love to know that I could rent a place and have the family come back and I was saying this, I was like Lily, 20 years from now, you're gonna be 35 years old, you might have a partner and have kids and Lincoln, who knows what you'll be doing,

Lando, I don't know, you'll be 28. You guys could all have lives, you'll have lives of your own. And what if I bring you back and we're all hanging out like after Christmas in some vortex. And what if you had this idea that like you were gonna go over to whatever, the way music was played, and you go over and you would play something. Like would you even know as like a sweet moment,

would you even know the music that your dad always played in the house when you were growing up? Like would you even know what that is? Like when I was a kid I know my mom played Al Green and Lionel Richie, so important to me now, and Michael Jackson, like I know that she, that's the stuff that was played. Would you know that? Like do you know who this is that's playing right now?

And they were like ah, Fleet Foxes? And I was like that's wrong but that's good and that would've worked, it's Lord Huron. So 20 years from now when we're all together, I don't want you to say a word, I want you to go over. I was talking to Lily, She's the most reliable one, I felt like it, with this kind of promise. I want you to, in whatever way music is played,

when we're all together 20 years from now, you got lives of your own but we're all back together, I want you to play some Lord Huron and then I'm gonna start hearing it and I'm gonna remember this moment and I want you to promise that you're gonna remember this and it's gonna be called the Lord Huron Promise. We'll shorten it to just the Huron Promise

because the Lord Promise sounds like something's probably already taken and she's like, okay, Dad, you're being weird. Oh, really? But you're being weird. Oh really? But I made a promise. So 20 years from now, 2038, I'm gonna be with my family and all of a sudden, a song's gonna play and my daughter will have remembered the promise.