Ear Biscuits with Rhett & Link - Could We Survive Prison? | Ear Biscuits Ep. 447

Episode Date: November 18, 2024

We’re innocent, we swear! In this episode, Rhett & Link discuss what might cause them to go to prison, and how they’d defend themselves in there, as well as who actually should order first at a restaurant, and a few interesting ways to switch up your fashion sense. Get 10% off your first order at https://hexclad.com/ear To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This this this this is mythical I Am so dreading groceries this week why you can skip it Oh what just like that just like that how about dinner with my third cousin skip it Prince fluffy's favorite treats skippable midnight snacks skip my neighbors nightly saxophone practices Nope, you're on your own there neighbors' nightly saxophone practices. Er, nope, you're on your own there. Coulda skipped it? Shoulda skipped it.

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Canada.ca. With ANC on, performance may vary based on environmental conditions and usage. Accessories sold separately. Welcome to Ear Biscuits, the podcast where two lifelong friends talk about life for a long time. I'm Rhett. And I'm Link. This week at the round table of dim lighting, we're going to figure out what we're going to prison for. Yep.

And then once we get there, what are we gonna do with all the time we have on our hands? Maybe make a shank. What kind of shank? Well, we gotta figure this stuff out. Better to have a plan. You don't wanna just show up in prison without a plan. That's true.

So today we're figuring that out and helping you out as we usually do in the process. I do have a little update. I may have just. On your eyes? Nope. I may have just broken in to my next layer, Link. I may be laying down my next layer,

if I do say so myself. And what pray tell is this, and it better not have anything to do with, like, I don't know, but projectiles. It does. If you're a member of the Mythical Society, thank you. I am. It's a valuable place to get exclusive content. Right, and one of the things you may have seen

over there is that Stevie and I survived the apocalypse and had to get some tips on how to live on together. From a survival expert, and I was not present. You would have been there, but you died. And- I died of COVID that morning. Well, I just wasn't there, but you died. And- I died of COVID that morning. Well, I just wasn't there because I had COVID. One of the things that we did is archery. And this guy had, he had a bunch of weapons.

It was crazy. And one of them was just a bow and arrow. And, you know, he set up this little target and. You discovered that you had a propensity toward it. I've never done it. I've never shot a bow and arrow. Yes, you have. Well, I mean, maybe there are times in which,

like somebody was like, here's a bow, shoot this arrow, but like, I have no idea what I'm doing. Yeah, I mean, we were even talking about how Ben, growing up, our third best friend that we talked about many times, he had a compound bow. Right, but I probably shot it one time. That's not what you shot in the video.

You shot a non-compound bow. A traditional bow. A compound bow, I remember from back then. It's got pulleys. It has like pulleys and like, so once you get it, you have to pull it pretty hard. Once you get it past that spot, it'll kind of... It locks in. It locks in. It stays there. And when you let it go, the fa-doing.

Fadwing is the sound it makes. Fadwing. Fadwing. But you were talking about, you were just, you were shooting a regular bow. I think it was a curvy bow, but it was a traditional bow. You were better, you were certainly better than Stevie. But think it was a recurve bow, but it was a traditional bow. You were certainly better than Stevie, but if I was there, would you have been better than me? Yeah.

Undoubtedly. Ha ha ha. Wouldn't you have loved to have seen that? I'm saying the same to say yes. Wouldn't you have loved to have seen it? Even, I don't remember, I haven't watched the cut, I was there, but the survival expert was like, you've never shot one of these?

I was like, I mean, since I was a kid, maybe this one time with Ben, no, and that was a different kind of thing. And so then I go on this. And so I am thinking like, oh, anytime there's something I could be interested in, I am interested in it. You know what I mean?

So of course I go on YouTube and I start looking at- But didn't your therapist tell you to find- So I start looking at archery culture and all these archery videos and archery personalities. YouTube is so crazy, man. It is like, if there's something you can care about, there's people who do and there's people who are making a living caring about it.

I just love it. And so yeah, I have been looking for something physical. I mean, I do a lot of physical things, but something that has like a therapeutic aspect, right? Mm-hmm. Because my therapist has talked about how, oh, it would be good if you had something like a martial art or something,

and I'm like, I don't do martial art. You know, it's like, you gotta like go to classes and like, I don't have time or that. And I'm already an artist. And so, I tell him about this, I'm like, well I'm thinking about archery, he's like, that would be perfect. And so it kinda gave me this extra little oomph

to follow through, so I started, I like, I watch these videos and I'm like, I wanna do traditional archery. I'm not like getting a compound bow and going super technical and like, you know, I just want something that's like, there's a flow to it. And so.

And hunting is not really a component of this for you. No, I'm not, I'm not, like I'm not anti-hunting philosophically, but I like, and I, there are parts of me that like the idea of it. I did it as a kid. I haven't done it as an adult, but no, that's not the intention,

but I'm, and also if you're hunting with a bow and arrow, you have to be really good because it's not like shooting an animal with a gun, it's just like, it's over if you shoot it in the right place. Bow and arrow, you can miss and then you're like causing this animal to unnecessarily suffer. But. Okay, all right. So that's not your intention.

No, my goal is to be able to- Your picture of yourself where? In your backyard with a target? Just a target, yeah, just a target. And so I figured I could get Shepard into this, and he was, when I told him about it, I was like, hey, we're gonna go and get bows and arrows. And he was like, okay, yeah, he was into the idea.

Okay. Well, surprisingly, it's not like a lot, there's archery people and archery clubs and stuff in LA, but there's not like an archery shop. There's sporting goods stores that have archery stuff. But I wanted to go to an archery shop because I'm a big man, if you haven't noticed, and I can't just walk in and buy a bow and arrow

because like you have to like a draw length and stuff. Oh. And I wanted a long bow. So you've got, like the recurve bow is like, they look like traditional bows, but literally the thing like curves back. It recurves up. It's kind of a newer technology.

And then a long bow is just like what you see in a movie, like a old bow that's just a long bow. Oh, just one piece of wood. And I called this place in Ventura, Bullocks Archery Shop. Two hours away. An hour and 20 minutes, or 30 minutes. And I was telling them, I was like, I'm a big man. You got any big bows?

And they were like, yeah, we have a 70 inch long bow. It should be big enough for you. So I tell Shepard, I'm like, let's go there. We're gonna drive there. And by the way, totally separate from this, about two months ago, it was actually at, it was way longer than two months ago. Was it at your birthday party? I don't remember. Uh, it was way longer than two months ago.

Was it at your birthday party? I don't remember when it was. There were no bows or arrows at my birthday party. But I was- For the parts I remember. I was in a conversation with somebody and I was talking about how kids are beginning to like 90s music again in the way that we liked 70s music

when we were their age. Okay. And our kids are the age of like high school college now. Mm-hmm. And they like these 90s songs. And I kind of was like, and 90s music is just not that great. It's what I kind of said in that. It was like, the lyrics are kind of weird and stuff.

And there's like, people figured out like power chords and stuff, whatever. I was kind of like talking trash about 90s music. Uh-huh. Our good friend, Mike, hears me say this. He loves 90s music. Uh-huh. Our good friend Mike hears me say this. He loves 90s music. And many weeks later, he sends me a playlist.

He was like, I wanted you, you know, I heard you talking about 90s music and I just thought that I think you're wrong. And I have created a playlist and an accompanying PDF. Are you serious? And it was a playlist and then this PDF that would have the song and then a paragraph about the song and its significance.

Okay. And like who it influences today. Like who? Who's on this playlist? You know, Nirvana. He's a big Pearl Jam fan. Pearl Jam, Smashing Pumpkins, but also like Tupac, Biggie, Lauryn Hill.

There was like a whole, there was like an R&B section and hip hop section. You weren't talking about hip hop. No, I was talking about- Alternative rock. Like rock. Even though I liked Nirvana, but we were never like, oh Nirvana, or even oh Pearl Jam. We would like them, but not love them.

Yeah. But then like, in listening to this play, so Shepard of course is really into music, and Shepard had the PDF open and we would play a song, well we would pause it, Shepard would read the PDF. And then we would play the song. This is on the drive. Yeah, yeah, and then we would talk about it.

Okay, that's cool. And this took our entire trip there and back. And then I immediately texted Mike and was like, hey, thank you for providing the entertainment. That was a great little road trip exercise. And the bonding for me and Shepard. And thank you for reintroducing me to some artists that I... But who stood out? I forgot how much I like...

Because Pearl Jam definitely holds up. Oh, yeah. I forgot how much I like Soundgarden. Like, we were Soundgarden fans. I was a big Soundgarden fan. And also, obviously, I'm a... Their third album, which is weird. Go ahead. Obviously, I love the Red Hot Chili Peppers.

Oh, was there chili pepper on that? Yeah, I think Scar Tissue was his song that he had chosen. But the interesting thing is that we were listened to a song by like, say, The Pixies. And then I would tell Shepherd, I was like, okay, I can appreciate this, but there's something, I can't tell you why I don't love this. And then, red hot chili peppers, and I'm like, I love this.

And I'm like, I know, okay, oh, it's got more of a groove or whatever. I think melody, right? Yeah, but we were just kind of analyzing what makes you immediately connect with a piece of music and not connect with other pieces of music. We had a great discussion, and not connect with other pieces of music. And we had a great discussion. And we're talking about what influences like,

cause he's really into music and plays and stuff. Anyway. And in the middle of that, you're like, hold on, we gotta get out and buy a bow. Yeah, yeah. But anyway, so thank you to the people at Bullocks for hooking me and Shep up. I got the, I did get the 70 inch long bow

and he got like a shorter recurve bow. And then we got a target. And then when we got back home, I was like, well, how are we gonna do this at our house in a safe way? A 70 inch, like what? It's almost as tall as Shepard. 72 inches. Well, it is tall as Shepard. It's just when it curves, it gets a little bit.

That's great. So when you're holding it, if I were to hold it, well, it would be my height almost. But if it were on the ground. Well, six feet is what? 72. 72 inches? Yeah. Yeah, so it's almost as tall as you.

Great, where are you keeping this thing? I got a little, these little, I didn't know this. You can't just set a bow up in the corner. Because it'll- It can't support its own weight. You have to set it horizontally. What do you mean you can't, if you prop it up, it'll start to-

Start to deform. And you can't leave the string on either. You have to de-string it. Every time. But is that as simple as grabbing it and looping it back over? No, it's not that hard, but there's a stringer. Like, we got everything that we need. Oh, God.

Like this stringer. I mean, it's like a $10 piece of rope, basically. You can step on it and pull the bow up, and the bow goes loose, and then you can reach and grab the string. But we've got them on a rack in the garage. And then we've got, I've got this rack coming, it's coming tonight, and it's gonna be this thing that goes up outside and it holds the target. The target.

And then there's like a sheet of Kevlar behind it so that when you miss the target you hit the Kevlar instead of like hitting the fence or whatever. But... So you're gonna be aiming at the fence and if you you go over the fence, that's your neighbor's yard. No, no, I shoot into the hill. Okay. So I'd have to miss by like 15 to 20 feet, which I'm not going to do.

Okay, I'll come over. But I was talking, no, see, I can't let strangers, and when I say strangers, I mean strangers to archery. I can't let just anybody come over and shoot because you'd have to be, you know, I'd have to gain confidence that you would at least sit in the Kevlar. Oh, give me a break. Give me a break. But, so I'm talking to the woman who's helping us out there

and I'm like, yeah, my, you know, I've never really done this before, but I did it a couple of weeks ago or months ago and kind of had a knack for it, and my therapist is like encouraging me to, she's like, I hear that a lot. Really? She's like, yeah, and people say,

at the end of the day, at the end of a hard day, you shoot the day away. So it's like, well, you know, cause you're like, Shoot the day away. It is like, it's, there's so much power in it. And I didn't even, mine's like a 30 pounder, it's, there's so much power in it. And I didn't even, mine's like a 30 pounder, it's like a beginner bow, but like,

it's crazy, like, I'm like, if there was somebody standing right there, it would go right through their head. It's so powerful. And so you just, like, you have all this power, oh, and this is the exciting thing, is, this is the thing that really excited me the most about it, is that when I did it, when we were doing, you know, the thing with Stevie,

like I was kind of aiming a little bit, but I didn't know how to aim it. I was like kind of just guessing, like closing one eye. But there's instinctive, which is you don't aim. So like if you shoot a basketball, you don't aim at the basket, the rim. You don't like line your elbow up and you don't like close one eye.

You just like look and you get the mechanics down and you just shoot, right? And that was something that I got good at. So there's a type of traditional shooting, which is the same thing. It's like you learn how your mechanics and where you're looking, you are able to get to a place

where you just kinda draw it back, look and let it go and you're hitting where you wanna hit. And it's like. Legolas. It's very, it's instinctive. And I was like, yeah, I'm not trying to win a contest or anything.

I'm like, it's like getting into the flow of it. You wanna just be walking down the street and just be able to like whoop one out and like hit a mailbox. Yeah. When you're on your walk in your neighborhood. I did string it up last night because you know, it's just like two days ago we got it

and Jessie hadn't seen it yet. So I like string up my long bow and walk into the living room. And I was like, Jessie! Like calling up to her, to the bedroom so she could come out and look down into the living room. And I, she came down and I was like, What's up?

What do you think? What do you think? And she was like, and Shepard had his bow too. She was like, y'all are crazy. I don't think it had the impact. I mean, are you gonna start carrying it everywhere? You gonna be like men in tights? No, but. Did they sell you tights? Is that part of it? I didn't see tights. Are you sure? I didn't go around the whole thing. You didn't ask

about the tights? But I will say. I really disappointed that you don't have tights. I am going to, I'm now, I'm going to be an asset in a situation where we need potentially food or defense. Okay. Or even offense. If we need, you know, like- Or just like- The apocalypse takes- An activity

to pass the time. Yeah. So yeah, I'll report back when I start actually shooting things. Do you have a quiver? Target. Yeah. And is it a strap-on? Well, yeah, they're all strap-ons. It's a cross-body belt?

No, it looks a little technical. I mean, it's a belt, and it's a belt, and the arrows are facing like this. The feathers are right here, so you can be like shooting and just like pull it out and put it on there. Instead of doing this. Do you need a license to carry it around? Yeah, you don't wanna, you have it on your hip,

now you don't have it on your back. Right. Do you have to, is there concealing carry? You're gonna have to stuff a bow down your tights? I don't know what the laws are. There might be laws against us. You know what, you know what let's do? Let's, you look into the laws that goes with this, okay? You bought this stuff, you need to look into the laws.

This question actually may come into play in a little bit here. Oh, yeah, you're talking about prison. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm seeing that now. ["Better Help"] Ear Biscuits is brought to you by Better Help. You, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm seeing that now. Ear Biscuits is brought to you by BetterHelp. You know what, I just wanna take a moment to give a shout out of thanks to my therapist.

Thank you, my therapist, who I'm not gonna give the name of because I wanna keep that to myself. Okay. Along with everything that I share with my therapist. Thank you for being the type of person that I look forward to sharing things with that other people don't get to hear. Well, that's great because this month

is all about gratitude and along with the people in our lives we like to give shout outs to, like your therapist, there's another person we don't get to think enough, ourselves. Oh, it's sometimes hard to remind ourselves that we are trying our best to make sense of everything and in this crazy world, that ain't easy. Here's a reminder to send some thank yous

to the people in your life, including yourself. We're huge advocates for therapy, so if you're thinking of starting, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist

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Terms and conditions for our different programs and policies apply, details at fizz.ca. I would like to launch an arrow. You can, but I think we're gonna have to go to a place where missing is not as consequential as putting a hole into my plastic fence. Because it'll like put a giant hole in it, because it's like a vinyl fence. Hey, maybe you got close enough. You got close enough. Well, I mean, Shepard can do it. Does Shepard miss?

No, and she said, she was like, you're a natural is what she said to Shepard. Oh, you had a fire arranger. I was like, yeah, it's in the family, you know. We're natural archers, we didn't know it. But now we've discovered it. Maybe you got a little elf blood. Yeah, my ears are a little bit pointed, you can't see them because of my hair.

You know, the orcs are part elf, maybe you just have orc blood. That would make more sense. I am insisting on Jessie calling me Legolas though. You know what we're also doing? You and Katy Perry. Well, you know we've got this channel, Mythical 24-7. It's a television channel.

It's basically Mythical content always on. Always running. Roku, Amazon Prime, Plex, and more. And we're gonna be running a marathon. Oh, we are? Beginning this Saturday and on Thanksgiving itself. So we do these holiday marathons where we're kind of centering around a theme.

I'm not exactly sure what. If you have a smart TV, Samsung, Roku, whatever you got. But if you wanna know. Just search Mythical 24 seven. You can go to Mythical24-7.com, Mythical24-7.com and get all the info you want about that. All right. All right, hit us with that voicemail.

Hey guys, my father is in his 60s and good guy, not a macho guy at all, but when we go to a restaurant, he orders first and typically, you know, customary, the woman order first. So, one of the ways that I can tell him without, you know, kind of making it awkward and my name is Chris and his name is Dwayne. If you want to do another podcast, I'll be sure he listens. All right, thanks. Oh, so you want us to talk directly to Dwayne and just go ahead and give him the advice

so you don't have to because you're afraid it will be awkward to tell him that you should let any women at your table order first? Well, this is actually an interesting, there's an interesting dynamic here because I have thought about this, very specific situation, not the specific situation of women ordering first,

but somebody needing some advice and just getting them to listen to the episode versus. Yeah, just send them the link. Just trying to translate our advice. It's easy to do on YouTube, and we're up for that, I guess. So hello, Dwayne. What's up, Dwayne? You're not too macho, you're a good guy.

We like that about you. Well. That's what we've heard. Yeah, yeah. The only source that we have, your son, says you're a good guy. He could be biased. Not too macho.

Let's explore this for a moment, and I invite the women in the room to order first. Speak. No, no. Yeah, why not? Well, no, I don't. Oh, you're gonna let them speak first? No, no, no, I don't, no, because I'm not gonna encourage

you to speak first, and the reason I'm not gonna do that is because maybe Duane is so progressive, right? Maybe Duane is so progressive that he recognizes or his opinion is such that the women ordering first is based in some patriarchal system or whatever. And so he's actively fighting that by taking one for the team and ordering first. Or maybe he's just hungry and he knows what he wants.

Because typically, if you're at a group with what, it doesn't even matter to genders, like most people aren't gonna know what they want. And if he's a man who knows what he wants, maybe he's just getting out of the way by ordering first. The waiter or waitress, the wait staff should be the one who is making this decision. They should be looking.

You can just defer to them. They don't always do that though. Now we're going there. You guys ready to order? Yes, I believe we are. And then you're quiet and you see who they look at first. Well, yeah, you're right. I bet you they're gonna look at a woman.

But here's another thing that's happening. Just saying, I know on Good Authority, because I read at least one article about this. Oh, you did? That some in the restaurant industry and the wait staff are actively trying to do away with this particular custom. For the progressive reasons.

Based on the fact that it's saying that like, oh, it's based on some idea that it's based in the tradition that women were not expected to pay. So they will order, I can't remember, of course I kind of half read the article. Just enough to talk about it on a podcast, you know what I mean? Without authority or, and probably spew misinformation.

Well talk about it. I'm just saying that some people can be like, this is based in some sort of idea where we let... Women are lesser than. Ladies first, right? Now before I give my opinion, I'll ask the ladies first. First. First.

Yep. What do you think about this, a ladies first thing when it comes to ordering? Well for me, because I never know what I want, I always tell people, let me go last. Oh, preemptive. So I'm a preemptive, like, let me go last, because I also don't like to order the same thing

as anyone else at the table, just because I'm weird like that. You have your own problems. Yeah, basically. You're indecisive, but you want to be special. OK. Yeah. I do understand. I mean, that's a whole other topic,

like not ordering the same thing as somebody else on the table. We'll have to come back to that. Yeah, put a pin in that. Because that's the real, we'll have to come back to that. Yeah, put a pin in that. Because that's the real, that's the thing. So you're bowing out of this personally. You always want to be last. Yeah, I just want to be last.

It's a lot of pressure. It's a lot of pressure to be first. Also, but I will say that if I come at the dinner table with my family. It's a lot for a woman to handle. If I'm at the table with my family, I'll be like, I'll go last, but then I usually gesture to my mom. So I guess I do kind of talk to the women first,

if that's the case. Okay. Jenna? I never thought about it before. I usually take cues based on the server and the other people at my table. Cause also, working in the service industry so long, there's an easy way of remembering who orders what

because you go in a specific clockwise motion of like you start with the person on your left, what would you like and then go around accordingly and then that's the seat number that is associated with that table, so then when you ring it up correctly in the POS system, you have your seat number, so then when the food is brought out,

so then when the food is brought out, it could be delivered directly to the correct seat. So you don't, see, so right there, you know enough about the service industry it could be delivered directly to the correct seat. Okay. See, so right there, you know enough about the service industry to not cramp the server's style and mix them up. Right. It's like you gotta defer to their system. Yeah.

Man or woman. I defer to the serving system, so I go off of the server, because also when I worked at Hooters, you did ask the woman first what she would like. You always started with women. Right, because there were always women at Hooters. Yeah. Occasionally. Yeah.

Okay, that makes a lot of sense. The practical application. So I definitely think that that makes the most sense. But even in like, my observation is in a fancier restaurant, the part of their system, they'll go around and they'll ask all the women at the table. Okay, well let's think about this. Just two people, a man and a woman together.

There is no system at this point. Who gets to order first and why? Well, I think you need more than two people, because when there's two people... What? No, but there's lots of times there's two people. All right, but to me, two people, and this goes back to Jamie's thing. With me and Christy going out to dinner, there's so much collusion going on. Because we're both eating off of each other's plates. I understand that, that you're coordinating orders.

We're ordering collectively, and then usually one of us will order for both of us, just like summarize the whole thing. Okay. Well that's a totally different issue when a man just says, she'll have the so-and-so and I'll have the so-and-so. No, we're deciding and then one of us is being the spokesman. Yeah, if it is discussed ahead of time of what we're ordering, I'm perfectly fine with my date ordering my food for me. If we have not discussed ahead of time,

I expect him to take a cue from me and I go first. Oh, yes. Okay, all right. I think women should have it, man. Well, okay. Not that they need it. I have a philosophical thing that I think women should have it, man. Well, okay. Not that they need it. I have a philosophical thing that I think might apply to things like opening the door for women,

et cetera, et cetera. And that is, okay, things like letting a woman order first or opening a door for a woman may be rooted or opening a door for a woman, may be rooted in some traditional, i.e. sexist framework. But if the whole point is to undo whatever sexism exists, I don't think the way that we do that

is by taking away something that we were doing for women. Even if it was rooted in something that was kind of sexist, which again, I don't really understand, I'm sure somebody, some social psychologist or social scientist could explain this to me, why, oh, well, they did this because of whatever. But I'm like, if I see a woman coming into a place, I open, a lot of times for a man too.

But if it's a woman, I kind of just like reflexively just I'm gonna open the door. And if I'm with a woman and I just kind of like, yeah, I let the waiter take the lead, but I'm kind of operating as if she should be the first one to order. Because I'm just thinking like, okay, yes, I am a feminist and I believe that men and women should have equal rights.

But if we're doing something in the traditional sense that is already benefiting women, let's just keep doing that. Why do we have to take that away? Does that make sense? Yeah. Well, if it's opening a door for somebody, it's not that I don't think they can open their own door.

Oh, that poor woman, she probably can't open her own door, so I'm gonna open it for her on this date. No, I obviously know she can open her own door. It's just a nice thing to do. It's just a nice little thing to do. Now, order, of course, now ordering first is just a position of, it could be a position of honor unless you're like Jamie and you're like this is a position of pressure.

So, but you can honor them and then they might defer. But I think it's just a little bit of like, I'm putting you, like you put some, put somebody's needs before your own. And what if I want wanna be one of those people that doesn't order the same thing? Well then, I'm not blocking somebody out. I'm letting them order and it's like, you know what? I give you the honor of ordering the fish,

and now, because of my deeply held belief to not get the same thing as someone else at the table for reasons that I've put a pin in, then I will have to eat something else because I honor your choice to take the fish. That happened to me recently where somebody was ordering. It's honor. And it went around the horn and it was coming to me,

and everybody had ordered the same thing. Like five people or something like that. It feels odd at a certain point. And it got to me and I was like, well that's what I was gonna get. And then did you get it? I changed it up. You did?

I changed it up so we didn't all have the same food. Even though we weren't even sharing. But it only applies when you're sharing. But it feels weird even when you're not sharing. Well I kinda wanna see something else the restaurant does. Yeah you wanna see. Yes, exactly. You wanna see.

Yeah. You wanna see as much as what the restaurant can offer and you wanna see other people enjoy it. And there might be a chance they'll give you a taste of it, but they don't have to. But that's an added bonus, that's not the reason you're doing it. Well, I like family style, even if it's not actually family style and no one's gonna share with me, I like to, in my head,

imagine that I will get to eat all of these things. But I do, I just like, I can't decide because I love all foods. So then I just look, and I'm like, well, I can just look and then I can maybe ask for a taste and then I've tried five dishes and stuff. Right, yeah, yeah. Me and Chrissy got in this huge fight. We took, it was Lando,

it might've been Lincoln at the time too, and Dad and Nancy, we took them out to eat in LA like a year ago. And the place was family style. And I was trying to point this out while everybody had their nos in the menu. And like, it was a weird menu. And so like, I also thought I would be able to like help dad out a little bit so he wouldn't have to like decipher what everything was, because he already had a bunch of questions. Mostly about like, do you have Michelob light? Which they did.

He had more than one question about that? He had a lot of questions about what do you have if you didn't have Michelob light, but you have something else like it? What's the closest thing to Michelob light? And in what way is it close to Michelob light? In what way is it close? Like this is a long conversation. While this was happening, it occurred to me that the place was family style, so I was like we should just get them to tell us the best things on the menu, because we're going

to share it all anyway. And I don't know what happened, and of course I'm just telling it from my perspective, but like something about the way that I said it deeply offended Christy. And I know you're on team Link with this one because I remember that time we were at that Chinese restaurant in... Sydney. Oh my god, yes. Oh yeah, because Jenny, you were there.

We told this story a couple of times. It was like Rhett and Jessie start ordering, they start telling everything that they're really excited about on the menu and start ordering it basically. Oh, okay. No waiter was present. We all sat down at a table, and I was like, and so my understanding was that we were gonna order family style, and so I was like, I definitely think we gotta do some of this so-and-so. I think it's the only

thing that I said. But then there was like a moment of, and we gotta do so-and-so, and we gotta, and then all of a sudden Christen was like, hold up a second! And I wasn't saying not to order anything else. I wanna order for myself. And it was like... I was beginning the conversation. And I do this, if you go out to eat with me,

you know I like to eat. And you like to. So you got people like Link, who when the menus come, he just wants to talk, talk, talk, talk. He's not looking at the menu, he's not thinking about what we're gonna eat. I'm like, we're at a restaurant, we're not at a talking hall, we're at a food hall.

I love talking halls. And you know what, once we figure out what the hell we're gonna eat, we can talk all y'all want. But the sooner we figure this out, the sooner we eat. And so I will take control not to dictate what we should order, but to make sure that like, hey, let's figure out what we're gonna eat first. Y'all wanna do some apps? Like, I'm that guy.

Yeah, that was misinterpreted as... I know what I think we all should eat, but I don't know if Peking Duck is supposed to be pretty good. It was. Everybody got what they wanted. That was a really good restaurant. It was. Wasn got what they wanted. That was a really good restaurant. It was. Wasn't a great experience.

What was it called, Mr. Wan or? I think it was Chen. I'll have to look it up. It's in Sydney, it's a Chinese restaurant in Sydney. It's been so long. What were you talking about? I think, I don't think there's anything broken with letting women order first.

How'd you all get in a fight? Oh, it was a similar thing to that when we were with Dad and Nancy, because I started suggesting things to get, I don't remember exactly how it happened, but I was like, but it's family style, we can share everything. She's like, no, let people order what they want. Let people order what they want. Why don't no, let people order what they want. Let people order what they want.

Why don't you just let people order what they want? I'm like, well, because everything can be true. Yeah, but we kinda retreated to our sides of the ring at that point. Yeah. From then until the food came out, we weren't talking to each other. Oh!

It was one of those things. But then it got a little better, because the food was decent. So, Dwayne, thanks for hanging on for this conversation. Dwayne, dude, just don't order first. Let someone ask you. Don't order until somebody asks you, okay? Yeah. Just get out of the way, dude. You're a good guy. Yeah, yeah. I know you're hungry. Nothing against being of the way, dude. You're a good guy. Yeah, yeah. You know, Dwayne. I know you're hungry. Nothing against being 60 or whatever you are.

I know you're probably not making the progressive choice here, and that's fine. I know you're probably just not thinking and you're like, I'm hungry and I wanna order this stuff. But so I would just say, take a step back and see if any of the ladies at the table, you know, seem like they wanna order first. And then don't eat the food until everybody's food gets there, Dwayne. Unless. Unless they say, at the table, you know, seemed like they wanted to order first.

And then don't eat the food until everybody's food gets there, Dwayne. Unless they say, go ahead. Unless everybody's like, go ahead, Dwayne. Go ahead, go ahead. I don't want your egg to get cold. Eggs are not good when it's cold. But I do. I don't know why you ordered eggs.

If somebody says, go ahead. Go ahead. Don't do what I used to do. They say, go ahead, I'm like immediately taking a bite. Just be like, you sure? So they can be like, yeah, I'm like immediately taking a bite, just be like, you sure? So they can be like, yeah, I'm sure. And then you eat. But then don't.

And then you eat until it's gone and don't talk to him until. Yeah, don't do that, that's what he does. Eating is something you can do while talking. No, Jessie's the same way. Jessie eats almost as fast as me. And we will sit down, especially if it's one of those restaurants where they bring something

and then they take it away and bring something else. We realized that we would just, they would bring the food, we'd start eating, and we wouldn't say anything until it was gone. And then we'd be like, that was good. And then we would talk. Hey, at least y'all are on the same page. Because it would take 90 seconds to consume

whatever it was. It's like Barbara and Sean. Yeah, y'all going dog with it. So, but we did, we have now become conscious of this. We're gonna be like, hey, let's take a few bites and then let's stop and let's talk. We like to eat so much that we forget about it. But now that we've stopped ourselves, we say, hey, let's talk a little bit. But you can talk when it's over. We like to eat so much that we forget about it. But now that we stop ourselves,

we say, hey, let's talk a little bit. But you can talk when it's over. It'll still be there. You have plenty of time when you're done wolfing it down before the next thing. So it's the same amount of talking either way. One would argue you might get more talking in by wolfing it down.

But you have the opportunity to like slow down. Cause what happens is when the waiter comes back, sees that the thing is gone, they bring the next thing. Yeah. And we start pacing, outpacing everybody in the restaurant. And I'm like, wow, I love to win, but I don't think there's a prize for this.

You're leaving early. The winner is the wait staff. They turn their table over. You're like their best. They love me. Yeah, you're their best. Jesse and I went to this Thai restaurant and we did have some place to be.

We were in and out of there in about 18 minutes. I mean, it was absolute. As soon as we ordered, within like three minutes, they brought the dishes out of it because it's like a place where like they're just constantly making the same stuff. And we didn't do an appetizer and we didn't do a dessert. So it was just like, we were done and I was like,

I feel bad, we're about to, she's like, what else are we gonna do? Besides sit here, we can walk a walk around. I was like, oh. Yeah, maybe talk, but no. Well, no, there was about 20 people in the lobby waiting to get seated. Oh, well, okay. And so I was like, well, we'll free up a table

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learn more. Let's hear another. Hi Rhett, hi Link. My name is Alana and I'm here with my best friend Izzy. Hi. So you showed me your old show like years ago, so we've been following. We have a scenario for you. If you were in prison, one, why would you be in prison? And two, what would you make your shank out of? Okay, that's it. Love you guys. Bye! I love this question. What are we each in prison for and what are we gonna make our

shank out of? Because like I said at the top, you gotta be ready for this. You don't wanna just wake up one day in prison and not be prepared. So why are we there? We should think for a minute. I'm actually thinking about you. Well I know that you would be there. Because you gave me your bow and arrow?

Accidental death of some sort. I was thinking about accidentally hitting somebody the other day. Well, I'm not considering it. I'm just saying it crossed my mind. With what, your fist? With my car. Oh.

Like what if I hit somebody? I just feel like that could happen. You got really close to that pedestrian and ended up being a fan. And yeah, and my instinct is to... I mean, it's horrible. I mean, like, I'm not saying I would do this. Your instinct is to run people over? No, but it's to run after.

Oh, yeah. First of all... I wouldn't do it. You have to tell yourself... I wouldn't do it. And I've had a... I've never been in a situation like this, but- But I'm a runner, boy. Anytime I see a story about a hit and run- I do, I do something that's not even wrong

and I think about running. I think to myself, anytime I see a story about a hit and run, I think, I know that person, some people are just bad people who do hit and runs, but a lot of people are just people who don't know what to do and they make it, you have to, if you get in that situation-

Don't. It is do and they make it, you have to, if you get in that situation, Don't. It is always going to make more sense and be much less consequential to stop and accept the consequences. Yeah. Do not run. This is good for me to hear. This is the reason why my prison sentence is less.

Right. Because I don't know what it is. I'm gonna blame it on my shame complex. Well, so the reason that you would go to prison is because you ran. Yeah. And then when they caught you. Because I didn't mean to do it. And then I was so scared. Yeah, for you it would be accidental death. But I did come back. By the time I came back, nobody was there. Does that help with the defense? No, then they're just waiting for you.

You think they'd be waiting there? I mean, like the cops would. This is kind of morbid. I don't really like joking about this because it involves hitting another human, which I don't, maybe this isn't why I went to prison. Let's go a little more playful. Or like, maybe embezzlement.

I bet you could do that. I bet you could be stealing money from me right now. I didn't know. Well, I was thinking. Boy, I'm sending you to the slammer. I was thinking about the, before we get into embezzlement, as I was figuring out where I'm gonna put this target in my backyard, I was like,

I'm not going to accidentally shoot into the neighbor's yard because of just the physicality of the situation. But I was like, what- He's above you and there's a big berm. But what if, like, what if that did happen? What if there was an errant arrow and it just happened to go into someone? Like, what would the punishment for that be?

Well, you could run in your house. I'd get in bed. That's what I would do. I'd run and I'd get in bed. I would get rid of all the evidence of me ever shooting a bow and arrow, and then they would bring up this podcast. Podcast, yeah. It's just like, you're screwed, man. This is premeditation. Like you were talking about your neighbor earlier. I think that- This is wild. I don't think either one of us is a law breaker.

I know, I don't think I am. But I could imagine that somebody who was doing something for us, and I'm not saying anybody is actually doing this, but I'm just saying that like, I could imagine a scenario in which for some reason we were, what is the word I'm looking for? Where you get drawn into something against your will

and you are- Ponzi scheme. I wanna say the word implemented, but that's not the word. Accomplice, in a way? You know, it's like you get, you are blanked in a crime. Implicated? Implicated. Yeah. Yes.

Oh, we can get falsely accused? Or it could be like, well, you're technically in charge of this thing that the person did that is illegal. I didn't do it. That's my story. And now you're implicated and now you have to go to like some, you know, white collar crime prison where they kind of let you get, they let you walk around and you could probably climb the fence if you wanted to,

but you probably won't because it'll just make it worse for you. Yeah. Those are not really- You might really be male. You have a laptop. Yeah. It's Sweden. There's not necessarily, that's not a shank prison. Hmm, but you can't hurt to have a shank. I'm still not, Jenna, are you satisfied

with why we're going to prison? Like, did you have an idea of why we would each be in prison? I can't see you all doing anything that would put you in prison except accidental. What about some... I think Rhett will go to prison for some sort of like, um, like acquiring some illegal substance. Not drugs, but some illegal medical device or something that was like that you were trying to... medical device or something that was like, that you were trying to, something that you were trying to help yourself.

Like, I'm gonna, I'm buying this thing in order to help with my back pain. Or something. But it turns out... Like I've got like a half-champanzee, half-human in my garage that I'm taking stem cells from. It's like an illegal import that you've gotten on the black market somewhere. You're like importing... This is good, because I would do that. Uh-huh, uh-huh. Okay, yeah.

I'd do something like that. Something where I was like, this shouldn't be wrong. Right. You're gonna be in prison for like 20 years and then it's gonna become legal. It's like... And then I'll be a folk hero. You'll be a folk hero for your gorilla... Everyone has half-, half chimpanzees

in their eyes now. Your chimpanzee. Everyone's getting stem cells from those. It's just the body though, there's no head on it. Oh yeah, it doesn't have a conscience. Right. It doesn't have a conscious experience. It's just, it's a lab for growing things.

It just happens to be, it looks a lot like a chimp human body. And a lot like me too though, cause it's compatible with me. Yeah, and you hook up to that thing every night. Maybe it's half pig, half me. People found it. With no head. You know, like you left the garage door open,

somebody hit the thing and then somebody walked by and they saw it and like, and then you're- All the wires and tubes. You're being arraigned. Yeah. You know? Can't leave the county. That's the type of thing that's putting you in prison. Some weird chimp human hybrid,

intravenous something or other. Yeah, I can see that happening. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm just hitting right, I guess. I'd make- Kinda shanker you make. I'd make a poop shank without a doubt. Oh my God, what are you talking about? What do you mean a poop shank?

You make a shank out of your own poop. I mean, the level of constipation necessary for such an endeavor is- Well, it's during the adjustment to prison food. Oh, period. And it's gonna be as hard prison food. Oh, period. It's still gonna be. It's gonna be as hard as a rock. And then you dry it in the right way and probably mix in some fiberglass or something.

You probably get your hands on some fiberglass. You gotta create a little bit of a substrate. And that way, it's an instant infection. Oh. To whoever you shank with it. I don't wanna shank, I mean an instant infection, too, to whoever you shank with it. I don't wanna shank, I mean, I was thinking like, what's wrong with a good mechanical pencil?

But then I think once I did shank them once with a mechanical pencil, then they're taking away my mechanical pencil, so how am I gonna do my mechanical pencil art? Yeah. That was the main thing that was keeping me lucid here in prison. I said, I don't wanna shank anybody with something that I need for other reasons. They're not gonna let you poop.

They're gonna make you collect it and turn it in every time. That's gonna be... There's a long plate of making a shank. You gotta do the thing where they let you go to the computer labs and stuff like that. The libraries for like further education. And then maybe get a piece of motherboard. Or like you can bust open the keyboard

and there's something in there. Yep, yep. I think you could carve down the weird end of a toothbrush with your teeth. I don't think they let you, I don't know what they give you for a toothbrush in prison. Are they real floppy toothbrushes? The number of things that they have to think through

like this. Yeah, everything's, I guess everything's soft in prison. Not everything. I don't know. I don't know. You didn't say what you thought I'd be in for, Jenna. I didn't. But I can see like involuntary manslaughter.

As something that would happen, yeah. There's actually a pretty as something that would happen. Yeah. There's actually a pretty good chance that'll happen. I mean, like, I mean, not a good chance, but like I'd say- To me? I'd say five to 10. Like I would say that you're, like if you're ranking people who might go to prison for that on a scale of one to 10,

you're on the upper end of the spectrum. You're not a 10, but you're probably seven or eight. I think I would be, I think it would be something that would just be, it would start with trespassing for me. Like I would, I'm fine with being in a place I shouldn't be because I'm not gonna do anything wrong. But then let's just say I get framed for something. Like there's a murder and somebody was dropped

into this pit and then I just happened to be looking around. And so like I'm the only one there. But you have a tendency to react and they find the pit. In unpredictable ways. Like if you were trespassing and you were caught. I'd run again. But like, you know, like we were together

and we trespassed, which we've done before. And they show, and the person shows up. I always play the like, oh, I didn't, you know, I'm sorry, we didn't realize, that's my vibe, right, I diffuse. Whereas if you're the first one to speak, you're like, why can't we be here, huh? Eee, eee, eee, eee, eee, eee, eee, eee, eee, eee.

You know what I'm saying, like why? We can easily get ourselves out of it. We don't have anything to do with the body in the pit. I got trespassing in North Carolina last time I was there. Oh really? Yeah, I was taking a little walk. Good. And I was out near the, I was way up in the middle of nowhere

in one of those inlets, not the Neuse River, but one of those mini inlets. Okay, at the beach. Yeah. And I'm taking a walk, and I mean, I am in the middle of nowhere. There's not a grocery store within half an hour. That's how far out in the middle of nowhere this place is.

And I'm walking around by myself and there's just a dirt road going into the woods. So you take it and see no signs. And so I was just like, well, this is a cool little dirt road. I start walking in the dirt road and it's like, it's going and going and going. And then I come around a curb, curve,

and there's like a teenage kid walking. And I startled him a little bit. He startled me a little bit because I just like, nobody back here. And I don't know where this road goes. And I'm like, how you doing? And he was like, good. But he kind of looked at me a little funny,

but then he kept walking. I was like, hmm. Yeah. Who is this kid? You're alone. Where is he going? You're both alone. Yeah, and so I keep walking. And then I start hearing a car coming from the entrance.

And it's like, I can tell that they're going very fast and like speeding up and then, like going around a curve and like coming at me fast. What? And I'm like, so what I did. Ran in the woods. Is no. Just run, run man.

I turned around. Get in your bed. And start, this again, this is where my brain works. I turned around and started walking towards where I heard the thing coming from. Because I was like, if I've trespassed, and this person is coming after me, and I'm walking further into their property,

I'm gonna go ahead and calmly be walking out of their property when they come up, because then it'll just be like, what? I was just on a walk, because I was. Sure enough, the guy comes around the corner and he's like, and he gets out of the car. Gets out of the car? He slams on brakes, gets out of the car,

and this is back was North Carolina, I know he has a gun. There's 0% chance that I'm wrong about that. He has a gun. And so I'm like. He got out of the car? Yeah, yeah. How old was this guy?

What did you see him? He was in his 20s. Okay. And he was like, can I help you? And I was like, just taking a walk, man. And. You and your hippie hair. And.

What are you wearing? I probably look like a yoga instructor, regardless of the situation. And I'm just taking a healing stroll through the. And he said, well, this is a private property. And I was like, oh, really? I didn't see any signs, because there weren't. And then he was like, well, we had a sign up,

but we took it down because we're doing some work. And I was like, oh, man. Work, I love good work. I'm heading right out, heading right this way, and then he was like, well, I'm not saying you're a bad person. Pfft. Ha ha ha ha ha.

He said, he said I'm not saying you're a bad person. Listen. Did you feel like he was saying you were a bad person? What I'm saying is that I'm just telling you, my diffusing skills, I made him apologize to me. He ended up apologizing to me. Wow. Because he was like, I'm not saying you're a bad person, but we have a lot of crazy people around here.

Damn, I would have killed him and had to bury him in the woods. And he's like, just a couple weeks ago, there was a naked man coming through here. Oh, yeah, I meant to tell you about that. And I ran, though, he didn't catch my ass. And so then I was like, oh, that's crazy, man. And he's like, yeah, I said, well, hey, thanks.

I'm just gonna walk right out, and I did. But again, he's commiserating with me, telling me about naked men. He said- I'm not trying to say you're a bad person, but there's a lot of crazy people around here. So what I'm saying is if you had have been either by yourself or with me, you'd be dead.

Well, somebody would be. Yeah. Yeah, cause he was ready. He was ready to fight. Woo, he came in hot. And was the other person in the cab of the truck? I don't know. I didn't see. The kid? I didn't see. It was an SUV. He may have been in the back. And if you had that bow and arrow, though. He may have been in the back. And if you had that bow and arrow though. Then I would have been a threat.

I would not just walk into the woods on some random dirt road with my 70 inch long bow. You can't just be going around with that thing. You're a target at that point. But your therapist told you to do it. Hey, my therapist told me to do this, man. Yeah, yeah, I'm just doing this for therapy. I'm trespassing because my therapist told me to be it. So. Hey, my therapist told me to do this, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm just doing this for therapy. I'm trespassing because my therapist told me to be here.

Yeah, 70 inches, yep, right here. Yeah, man, it's gonna be ironic when you're the one locked up, I'm on the other side of that glass talking to you on the phone, asking about the friendships you're building in there. You know, my thing is, could I get buff in prison? I really think that genetically, I'm not able. Well, you never tried.

I've tried on many occasions, but are the people who are bulk in prison, are they bulked before they went into prison and they're just maintaining? Well, a lot of people. Are there people who are bulk in prison, are they bulked before they went into prison and they're just maintaining? Are there people who really make a transition to bulk when in prison? Because the food is rationed. No, but you can get enough. You don't eat enough food to get bulked.

You can get bulked up easy. Well, but prison, that's the silver lining for me. Right? I mean, weights, calisthenics, little wind sprints. You could finally read a book. Yeah. He really started reading when he went to prison. I really don't feel like I need to go to prison to read.

But to work out, maybe. You read a lot though. Maybe. Think about how much you'd read. Well, but they can't give you things like how to make a shank book. They probably glean all of that out of their library. No, they're carefully screened. Yeah.

So I don't know. Let's take one more. Hey guys, this is Katrina calling in from Madison, Wisconsin. I'm super excited to finally be calling in I watch every single episode of Ear Biscuits and I just always really want to call in my boyfriend and I we've been dating for two years and counting We're very happy, you know green flags all around But I've been noticing this pet peeve of mine that's been developing for some time now

And I don't know what to make of it and it revolves around his fashion sense. I would call it out of date. I also don't think it's the most flattering to his physique as it could be and lastly like the caliber of our outfits particularly on date nights is pretty different and so I don't really know what to make of it. Should I, as his girlfriend, help him out? Or am I being an asshole and is this something super superficial? Have you guys ever had this issue in your relationships? And if so, what did you do? Really looking for your advice here, so thank you guys so much in advance. So thank you guys so much in advance. Wow. Is it superficial to have a negative or critical opinion of your significant

others fashion choice? Or lack thereof? It doesn't seem like he's making many active choices when it comes to what he's wearing. Well to be clear, yes, it is the definition of superficial. It's the outer layer. However, a little bit of superficiality is part of our culture. I mean, look at us. You know what I'm saying?

Look at him, look at me. You gotta know that it's superficial. But there's nothing wrong with it. But again, because this is about matching the energy here. Like if you didn't care about it, and he didn't care about it, which you all know that couple. You all know the couple that doesn't care about.

And that's fine. They're matching their energy, that's good. But it's the mismatch in energy here that we have to rectify. Because you obviously do care about it to a certain extent. And it doesn't have to be a complete match. No. And you don't have to have the same fashion sense as your partner, and you don't have to look exactly the same.

Like, I would not ask Christy to go out on the limbs that I go out on at times. Yeah. But you gotta be within, you gotta close the gap a little bit here. And there's a couple of ways you can do that. One way that we should consider is going off of the indication that he doesn't care personally. Because if his stuff is outdated,

that means he's not actively looking and trying things that say aren't working, it's that means he's not actively looking and trying things that say aren't working, it's just that he's not trying anything. He's not adding to his repertoire. And I would say, So that, yep. Four times out of five, roughly, a person who dresses in this way

actually would like a little bit of help. Doesn't have direction. So 20% of people are just like, no, I don't care. Like I literally do not care. But most people are like, yeah, but they can be kind of afraid to begin, like some people got bad haircuts. Let's just be honest, a lot of people got bad haircuts. Let's just be honest, a lot of people got bad haircuts.

And there's a lot of people who know that they have a bad haircut. They wish they could fix it, but they don't know how. But the idea of making a change is so intimidating to them and so like, I don't like to draw attention to myself. I don't wanna, like who do I talk to about this? Like I'm just, you know what? The easiest thing to do is just to stay

with this bad haircut, even though they know in their heart of hearts it's a bad haircut. But there's only some people, a small percentage of people, who have a bad haircut, know it, and don't care. Right. You know what I mean? So you gotta assume that he actually is willing to accept help, but just doesn't know how to help himself in this situation.

But you might end up in an extreme place where instead of there being something collaborative, now you're just in charge of dressing the guy. And there's scenarios where that works, but I'm not a big fan of that. Well, you're not a big fan of that because you like to take control of your own fashion, but there's a lot of guys who if their wife would just dress them, they would be incredibly

happy. Or their girlfriend would dress them. I'm just saying. Yeah. And I think that can be a beautiful arrangement. And you could probably do it without taking them shopping too, cause then it's just like, you can take stuff back, take stuff home, have a little fitting, make a little thing out of it.

Make him be a model for you. Well you need to do that, what is that thing? Dangle a little sex. I think they were a sponsor, you know, no, we're not, you don't need to manipulate with sex at this point. Oh, okay. Yeah. Not yet. Let's see if we get there. Okay, all right, all right.

There was that service, I think they were a sponsor at one point. Stitch Fix? Yeah. Or the other one? I think they were a sponsor at one point. Stitch Fix? Yeah. Or the other one? Or the other one? There's ones where they'll send you the things and then like, you can just get it for them as a gift.

Yeah. And just be like, hey. Because if you don't like the stuff, you send it back. And if you like it, you wear it. Yeah, that's the whole idea. There it is. I mean, I don't know. Right there.

They've got the stuff that you're after. There's different genres, but you can have business or business casual, or you can have active wear or something like that, and then you can work within that. And nothing's really that risky. They put it together for you, you just wear it. That seems like the easiest thing. And it's a subscription service. I mean, if we it together for you, you just wear it. That seems like the easiest thing.

Yeah. And it's a subscription service. I mean, if we were sponsored by it, we'd be saying the name right now, but I mean, that was in the past. But there is a completely different avenue that you could take, which may be equally advisable. Body paint.

No, what I was gonna say is, you stop caring. Oh! Because. No, no, no. What? Hey, listen, because here's what I'm gonna say. is you stop caring. Oh! Because... No, no, no. What? Listen, because here's what I'm gonna say. I actually aspire to be less superficial.

I just can't bring myself to do it, right? And so I've kinda given up on it. I'm on camera too much. People have opinions about the way I look. It's very difficult for me to not care about the way I look. Yeah, but I'm not superficial, and I'm not gonna give up on it. It's a form of

self-expression. But hold on. And it's, I mean, the closer an extension of you is a person, it's a personality extension. Okay, that is a charitable view of it that I don't disagree with, but it is... That's my personal view. Hold on. But if there's a monk... I feel attacked.

Okay, hold on, but let's just be... I'm... well, I started by saying that I was superficial. So what I'm saying is that I know... That part didn't attack me. I'm more superficial than a monk, right? And I think that monks are probably happier people. That if we all just said, you know what, I'm not gonna... Like, it's one thing to be like, I'm expressing myself. It's another thing to care about how it's perceived.

Those are two kind of different things, right? Are you dressing for yourself? Are you dressing for other people? Most people are doing it for both, some combination of both. And I'm saying the part that is for other people, which is a totally natural human instinct, we're a social species, we're sending signals to one of,

I ain't about to start letting go and not care about the way I look, don't worry. But you're telling this person to do that. I'm just saying that if you found somebody who doesn't care what they look like and they're well adjusted and you can join them in that, you may end up being the happiest couple of all. There may be a happiness quotient that you may end up being the happiest couple of all. There may be a happiness quotient that you will achieve

that the rest of us superficial people are incapable of. I don't wanna hold you back from that if that's an option. I'm just saying you could settle if you can't make it to that high mark, which you shouldn't. Capsule collection. I mean, just stuff you can throw together and mix up. If you have like five different things, you see those TikToks where it's like there's the men with the suits and they're like, brown suit, gray suit, black suit, navy suit,

and then two black turtlenecks, two cream turtlenecks. And then you can switch everything. I always get a kick out of this. I don't really do that, but I just think that's an answer. And I can just see it in a closet and it makes me really secure feeling. That like, oh, I can, and that's why I started wearing more, I like wearing a white t-shirt and then I like putting different stuff around it.

And if you can be, you can be a white t-shirt, and then I like putting different stuff around it. And you can be a white t-shirt person with different stuff around it. But having a way that you can approach where it's not like, well, my wife told me to wear this, and now that's the one thing I got to wear, and I gotta save up no money to get eight of those, eight outfits, no, you don't want outfits, you want pieces you can mix and match.

But you can get someone to do that for you. But there is something here. There's another thing that we're kind of talking about. Like I don't go to church anymore. Don't have plans to go back. But I still observe church culture, right? And I remember when I was in church, I used to, I still observe church culture, right? And I remember when I was in church,

I used to, I had a lot of judgmental opinions about pastors and priests who were in certain denominations who dressed in a uniform. I thought that like the whole like Catholic garb or. Oh. I thought that that was like, I was like,

it's weird that they dress up in some way to like set themselves apart or whatever. Of course, I was completely missing the point because the opposite end of the spectrum is what I see in Los Angeles is these super cool pastors wearing these incredible clothes and being so cool. And let me just tell you right now, I'm not saying I don't respect somebody who dresses cool.

Like, Link dresses cool, I respect him, I love him. But if he was my pastor, I would not trust him. I would not trust him. I don't trust anybody to give me spiritual leadership that cares that much about what they look like. If your pastor is not a little bit dorky, he's up to something. I'm just telling you, probably. I'm just saying. Maybe he's not up to something yet, but he's got a door open to it.

It raises questions. In that context. Of priorities at least. In that spiritual formation context, this person who, cause you know how much time. That's why I'm not a pastor. You know how much time it takes you

to figure out what you wanna wear? It takes me a long time to figure out what I'm gonna wear. Oh yeah. Like do I want this pastor who's supposed to be offering me spiritual leadership to be spending that much time figuring out what he looks like? No! Right.

And you're like, but he's in a cool environment and he's trying to be relatable. You can stretch that analogy as far as you want. Don't give me that. You know what I'm saying? I'm just saying that I know that I'm superficial. I know that I'm superficial. I think I recognize it, but I'm just saying I know that I'm superficial. I think I recognize it,

but I'm just saying, when I see somebody who I can tell they do not care about what they look like, people who are doing the real work in the world, who are getting their hands dirty, who are doing amazing things for people, serving people, they're not cool in the traditional sense most of the time. I'm just saying. Unless you're like Bono.

Yeah, I know, but even Bono, he's a really cool guy, and he's doing all this stuff, but there's, ego recognizes ego. Bono has an ego. He's a rock star. Do you know what I'm saying? I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that necessarily, but if he doesn't recognize it within himself,

then he's gotta open door to having that ego taking advantage of him. Alright, so maybe she's the one who needs to walk through the door, you know? Become, get a little bit closer to being a monk, like your pastor partner. You know, maybe encourage your partner to become a pastor. Yeah, right, that's where this is, this is where this goes.

I think we need more of these lame-ass dressing pastors. Yeah. That's what we need in this world. I'm just gonna say right now, I don't have any plans to go back to church. But if I ever do go back to church, it will be at a church where the person is wearing a uniform. You call it a uniform. I don't know what they call it. Regalia? It will not be somebody who's got cool clothes on.

I am never going back to that. And I never did that, but I'm just saying that's not where I'm going back, man. It's just like, I get it now. You wear this because it takes that out of the equation. It takes the way you look out of the equation. But I don't think there's anything wrong with saying, hey, why don't we go out and buy you,

but get you, find you something. Find you something. That's probably the solution. Let's update your wardrobe a little bit, buddy. That's probably the solution. I'll go out, I'll bring some stuff back we can have a little try on. But if he does plan to be a pastor.

Leave him be. He could be really setting himself up for success. Leave him be. Well. Well really setting himself up for success. Leave him be. Well... Well, we did it again, Link. We did it again, and we cherish your phone calls. Leave us a voicemail. If you want to challenge us with...

I'd like to see you try it. A real world scenario, or a philosophical quandary or anything in between, if you need to respond to us, we accept it all, 1-888. Ear Pod One. We'll talk at you next week. Hey Rhett and Link, it is Stephanie from Raleigh, North Carolina, GOPAC. I was just at Target wearing last year's

Good Mythical Evening T-shirt. The cashier said she loved my shirt, so we got to talking, and she said she became a fan, sorry, Kate, sorry, she became a fan because of WonderHole, and I thought that was so cool, and I had to call and let you know. Okay, bye, love you, say it back.