Ear Biscuits with Rhett & Link - Link's Garden Hose Adventure & Rhett's Wok to Paella

Episode Date: August 21, 2023

This week, Rhett & Link are giving you a glimpse into some of their top purchases they’ve made over the years. From the practical, like a new toilet seat, to the bizarre, like a sensual graphic novel. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This, this, this, this is Mythical. Introducing TD Insurance for Business, with customized coverage options for your business. Because at TD Insurance, we understand that your business is unique, so your business insurance should be too. Contact a licensed TD Insurance advisor to learn more. Welcome to Ear Biscuits, the podcast where two lifelong friends talk about life for a long time. I'm Rhett.

And I'm Link. This week at the Roundtable of Dim Lighting, we're giving you a mashup of the funnest conversations we had about the bestest products that we've bought over the years. Because at the end of every year, we do a little list of our favorite purchases from the year or just a list of things that we purchased to give you a little insight into our spending habits. Our top purchases. And so we put together some of the most interesting ones from each of us.

And they're all together because we've gotten feedback that you enjoy those episodes and now you'll enjoy the most enjoyable parts in this journey. from each of us. And they're all together, because we've gotten feedback that you enjoy those episodes and now you'll enjoy the most enjoyable parts in this journey. I like any sentences. Mm-hmm. Enjoy.

And we will be back with a all new Ear Biscuit next week. How about this one? Try this on for size. Coarse Sea Salt. Coarse Sea Salt. Coarse Sea Salt. Now. Is this for bathing? No, but some of these purchases.

This is like a scrub. I actually noticed in looking at my list of purchases this year, which were, most of them are not, I have a couple of big ticket items. Okay. But most of them are like coarse sea salt, which probably costs 10 bucks. A big thing of it is based on something that I learned,

a lesson that I learned that now I am applying in life. Well, can I guess? So you said it wasn't a scrub. Does it go in your mouth still? You're not gonna guess it. Coarse sea salt. I could give you an hour and you wouldn't get to it. Is it for cleaning?

Because that's what I would use it for. Okay, yes, but do you know what it's for cleaning? What it's for clean? What it's cleaning, what it cleans, what I use it for. Cement stains? No. In your driveway? No. I'm not sure how entertaining this guessing game's gonna be. In your driveway? No.

I'm not sure how entertaining this guessing game's gonna be. Okay, what? Cast iron pans. Okay, yeah. So a big revelation this year for me was the embracing of cooking on cast iron. You know, you hear people talk about it all the time and then we had one because you've always,

everybody's got one and then you start cooking with it and you're like, I don't like, what? You can't clean it? What, you can't use soap? What? Like, it just seems like an inconvenience, right? Yeah. And everybody says that they're like nonstick,

but actually they're not, everything sticks to them. So this year, I don't know what it was, but I just, you know what it was? It was freaking TikTok. That's what it was. It was being unable to avoid people giving you tips on how to do things correctly. And so somebody like talking about a cast iron pan

in a TikTok and being like, if you just do it like this, it will become the best pan that you've ever owned. And so I was like, okay, screw it, I'll do it. And I did it and it is the best pan. And now I have a bigger one. And then one of the things that I figured out through another TikTok, not the same TikTok, is that a great way when you're done cooking with it

to clean it is you kind of get everything you can out of there and then you just put a bunch of coarse sea salt in there, heat it up really hot and just take a paper towel and just sort of like move it all around in there and it gets everything. And then you just take that under the sink with some water and you just boom, boom, boom. And then you put more oil on it, heat it up,

and then leave it there. And it becomes super seasoned and it's just been revolutionary for me. The interesting thing about this is that I not only know all of this, but I have personally experienced it. This, we're experiencing a strange intersection between the two of us.

A convergence? Yeah, because I, you know, I don't cook. I've already established that with the spoons and everything else I've talked about ever about cooking. But, and it could have been on TikTok for me as well, I'm a cleaner. And I saw a TikTok where somebody bought a, like a worn down skillet that was like rusted.

And then- They resurrected it. They resurrected it using those techniques. Because the good stuff's under there. It doesn't go away, it just gets added. Because I just watch cleaning stuff, on TikTok and on Instagram. So that came up for me.

And then, I don't know how it happened, but we had a cast iron skillet that I think I used on the grill. Yeah. To like saute onions to go with like smash burgers. And then I left it out there and it got rust. I've done this. And I was really dejected.

And so, I don't know which happened first, but yeah, I used the sea salt and you can, and you also use, you put oil on it. You have to oil the- When you're done, you oil it and heat it up again and then wipe that down. So you want it to be really oiled. And you can kind of store it with some oil

so that it like- Yeah, it's like coated in oil. So it like stays- I just it like, Yeah. It's like coated in oil. So it like stays, I just, honestly, I just leave, we leave both the big one and the small one on the stove at all times. I don't, we don't even, we don't really have a place to put it up.

So it's just like, that's what we cook in and it's there all the time. Solar mole repellent, ultrasonic mole repellent, solar powered, outdoor waterproof, ultrasonic snake repellent for get rid of mole, gopher, snakes, vole, and other underground pests. Four pack.

Pretty obvious, right? I'm actually surprised that it says snake repellent. I love that. So I got four of these. I had some of these. And I got rid of my moles. In my yard, moles in my yard. And I'm on my skin.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Some people have bought mole repellent thinking that they can rub it on themselves. Yeah, this is like, it's like a stake that you put in the ground. It's got a little solar panel thing on top. I bought them, the moles went away. My yard got even again.

And then somehow they disappeared. They might be under Lincoln's bed with a nest full of spoons, I don't know, but I had to buy four more. They don't, it's not poison, it's just a sound. So I put, I staked it out, and yeah, it works like a charm. It forces them into my neighbor's yard underground. But yeah, that's their problem.

Do you know that for a fact? Based on the reviews, yeah, there was, people describe how if you do it in one area, then they'll just move to another area. And so the only area for them to move in here is my neighbor's yard. I mean, maybe they went all the way into the woods. I don't know.

I don't care. But I mean, I think that my neighbors were probably sending them into my yard. So like- Everybody's got to work together on this. Everybody's got to work together. The only thing I don't like is that it's like a, it's not a constant.

So it's like silence and it's like, eee. Eee. So every time I would go outside, it was kind of unsettling. You can hear it. Yeah, yeah. It's gotta be like that though because- It's not ultrasonic.

Well, it says ultrasonic. It's not freaking ultrasonic. I would just call it sonic because I can hear it. It has to cut on and off because otherwise they adjust to it. Potentially. I don't know. That's a good theory.

That's what I bought. It does work. But then after a while, I get annoyed with it and I take them up. And then eventually, it took about nine months for them to come back and maybe it was seasonal, but the moles, voles, or whatever they are came back.

So I recommend that. You're not killing them, you're just shooing them. Makes you feel a little better about it. Well, you could find a way to catch them and eat them. I'm not that hungry. You could probably find some recipes on TikTok for like mole stew or something. Put them in that nicely oiled skillet.

This purchase comes with a story. I bought four items, two Carolina Panthers hats and two Carolina Panthers shirts. I remember seeing you wearing this once and it was just one of those things where it's like- You didn't ask any questions? Yeah.

I thought I told you this. So- Is this a James and the Shame? Yes, so- Something. So I had a PR person working on, like right around the launch of the album with me on some like press opportunities. And one of them was, I guess it was Spin Magazine

has this thing where they do like, musicians give predictions for their favorite team's NFL season. And she was like, would you be interested, do you watch NFL? Do you have a favorite team? And would you be willing to do this? And I was like, yes, a little bit.

And then to the second question, I mean, I'm an NC State football fan. I like college football and that's what I watch. But I consider myself a Rams fan being in Los Angeles, but I have an affinity for the Carolina Panthers only because they're in North Carolina, but I don't really keep up with it. And I don't own any fan gear.

So what I said is, yes, I'm willing to do that. Yes, I'm willing to do this. And I can do either the Rams or the Panthers. I feel like just, there's probably somebody else already representing the Rams. So yes, and I'm like, the reason I'm doing this is because of the press opportunity. So I did, so first thing-

It's all an illusion. So the first thing I needed to do was, get close. I mean, I don't even, I don to do was get clothes. I mean, I don't even, I don't wear NC State stuff. Because they were putting a picture of you? Yeah, they wanted a picture of me in Rams gear. I mean, in Carolina Panthers gear. So I had to find some.

And based on what I saw of you wearing that stuff, I don't know if it's a great PR opportunity. I'm just telling you. I mean, you look like a dork, dude. Well, can I just say, and I hate to say this, but it's very difficult to dress up in support of your team and not look like a dork. I know.

It's like you're cosplaying as what everyone thinks a fan is. It's like, aren't there people who are fans of sports that also like to look cool? You can, for some reason, this is, I have a theory. This is it. They make the stuff out of the same material that they make athletic clothing out of a lot of times. So like these T-shirts had this like moisture wicking dry fit. Like so much of this stuff has this...

In case you need to go out there. Well these people are just watching sports, guys. On the field. Like when you go watch a concert, you can get a cool t-shirt that is like a cotton t-shirt or like a 50-50 t-shirt. You can get a cool hat that looks like someone who is ready to watch something. Fans of athletic performances should be able to wear the same things that fans of musical performances wear. You're not playing!

Hey, hey, you need to shut up. This is a business opportunity. We need to keep this to ourselves until we're ready to launch. They just don't make any cool, they don't make enough cool stuff. Even like, I would wear more NC State stuff, I would. But like, it is just like a needle in a haystack

to find a shirt that's cool. Like the retro logo-ing is one particular avenue to coolness. Well, and NC State has- They brought that back. Yeah, they brought back the wolf, but then the stuff that they put it on, it's like they're still in this athletic mode.

Like, I was like, what do you guys think I'm doing? I'm sitting on a couch and then standing up at moments and then sitting back down on the couch. And now posing for a photo. I don't need moisture wicking material here. For Spin Magazine. So what did you look, I never saw this photo. Did it happen?

Oh yeah, it was just a selfie. I took it in there. You were wearing what, a jersey? No, I wore a T-shirt and a hat, but even that still felt like, hey, this doesn't feel like me, but I mean, that's what they wanted. The other piece of this puzzle is

I had to come up with my prediction for the Carolina Panthers season. So at that point I just texted my dad and said, a research project for you newly retired man who also doesn't care that much about NFL football, but likes college football in Georgia. Like he quickly like just came back with like, He's your ghost writer. Here's what I think.

And now I will say that if you read the article, any funny parts of it. Your dad wrote. I wrote, cause my dad didn't make it funny. It was very much just like, here's bullet points, including my obsession with the long snapper. I added that. Okay.

So that's the long snapper stuff because I am genuinely interested in long snappers and the Johansson I think his name is is like

played like 16 seasons without missing a game or something anyway so yeah I had to get so if you ever need

any Carolina Panthers stuff I got two hats and two shirts we can go out together that you will never wear again yeah

I also I'm just didn't anything come from it did you get any listens from Carolina Panthers fans that you're now completely undermining with this story? I think the name of the article was, 56 musicians predict their take on their NFL season. Who else?

Some people that you would recognize and a lot of people that you wouldn't. So maybe I got one lesson from that. It was worth it. That's the world of PR, man. Oh yeah. Oh my gosh. Oh, here's a good one, a sweet one.

Where the Sidewalk Ends, the book. I'm familiar with it. Shel Silverstein. And, you know, I didn't write it down, but also we just got a bunch of like our favorite, you know, kids books, couple of Shel Silversteins, like The Light in the Attic, Where the Wild Things Are. And this was-

Did you get the issue of Playboy with his famous interview? Did you also get that? Uh-uh, uh-uh. Shel Silverstein. Nice touch. Yeah, he wrote a boy named Sue for Johnny Cash. He's like, he was in that world, the outlaw country world. Anyway, but cool thing.

This was in honor of, maybe you've seen these. There's like, if you take a walk with your dog in a neighborhood, or if you go to certain parts of town, you can see there's like these little libraries. They look like a bird box. Yeah. But it's a library where you can exchange books. You can put a book in, take a book out.

where you can exchange books. You can put a book in, take a book out. And Christy did this with, well, her sister, Brittany and JB, they ordered and then her dad, Bobby, my father-in-law, built one of these boxes and then they painted it custom color and they put the plaque on it and they put it up in honor of their first daughter passed away like hours after being born. And she would have been 10 years old.

Selah would have been 10 years old this year. So every year they celebrate her life and then their other kids, they now have two more kids. I got a niece and a nephew. They learn about Selah and the story of even through all of that pain, that it's become something that's been very beautiful, you know, and honoring her memory.

So like for her 10th birthday, they created one of these boxes. So we were able to buy books for it. And we were actually- They put it up in the neighborhood or they put it up in front of their house? They put it up in Lillington at the ballpark. You know where you and I did the Fourth of July,

where they do the fireworks every year? That's where I play baseball hundreds of times. And where we did our Fourth of July wax paper dogs concert. Yeah, they actually put it up there. And we were, because we went back for Lance's wedding, we were there for like the ribbon cutting. So we were able to put the books in there

and honor Selah's life and memory. And just, it was a great family moment to be a part of that. And yeah, I wrote down the name of the littlefreelibrary.org. Oh, so you can just make one. There's a number of places that will do it. But if you go to littlefreelibrary.org, you can order the pieces and they'll send it to you

and you can build it and paint it yourself. And then you can like, they'll send you like the plaque to put on it so that in their case it can say, in honor of Selah. And then it's part of the community and it looks really cool and nice. And of course they got permission from the ballpark

to put it there. That's awesome. So yeah, littlefreelibrary.org. It's like a, and you know, you can do it for whatever reason you want or just do it to contribute to your community. But like, you know there's lots of kids who are like, taking walks and are like, hey, let's go to that library.

Let's see what books are in there now. Let's put some of my favorite books in there. It's like, I don't know. You think kids are doing that? Yeah, definitely. Kids still got books? Yeah, that's the thing. It's kind of this retro thing that like gives you

a sense of connection and being a part of something. Unless you vandalize it. Yeah, I mean, this isn't a good place where it's like. It only takes one. Yeah, sadly that's true. When you talk about that place, the Lillington ball fields there. Yeah.

They're so nostalgic to me because of the smell, which it was a mix of dirt, grass, popcorn, and cigarette smoke that I felt like I smelled repeatedly as a child playing outdoor sports that was so pronounced at that particular location that I'm sure it doesn't smell as much like cigarette smoke anymore because it's just so much less common

for people to smoke. Well, we went, the other cool part of it was that morning, our nephew, Nehemiah, he had a soccer game there on the field, so we watched him play and then we dedicated the library, took some pictures. But I was like, yeah, it's wild to come back here. I was telling Lincoln, Atlanta, I was like, I played tee ball on these fields,

but because I hated tee ball. It makes you feel anxious when you see the fields. Yeah, I was like, my butthole was getting real tight. So yeah, I choose to think more about like all of the fireworks. That's what I associate with the fireworks. We did fireworks here. With Uber Reserve,

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up to 90 days in advance. See Uber app for details. I was looking back through the list and I was just so shocked. I was like, okay, I got an expandable garden hose. Cause you don't want, I don't want one that you gotta like loop up and you know, all of the problems with like,

where's it gonna be stored and how, and how big is it and how, it just doesn't cooperate with being coy. I went on this journey in 2020, by the way. Did you talk about it? I don't know if I did, man. Why didn't I land? Okay, I had, I went-

Because I bought it at the hardware store. It was expandable. And then what would happen is it was like black and it would scrunch up. So at the moment that all the liquid came out of it, it would shrink up like cold wiener. And then it'd be very easy to store. But then when that thing gets plump again,

when it's shooting out all that water, it's spurting out of every place. It's cracking leaks all over the place. Just like a penis. And I will tell you that like, we bought the ones that said, oh, 100% guaranteed. And then what are you supposed to do? They break, they break.

They don't just break. Sometimes- We bought three and they were all like, psst, psst, psst. They just split in the middle. And like, oh, there's just a whole section. You can't get an expandable. So then we were so angry that we bought a flex steel. Like we went to the opposite extreme.

It's like a chrome. It's like a, it's just a pipe. It's just a pipe on a hinge. It's a pipe. You can't, it doesn't bend at all. It did bend. It would bend up, but it was like little. This is not gonna leak.

No, I can only water in this exact radius, but it was like little. This is not gonna leak. No, I can only water in this exact radius, but it will never leak. What we did, and you know, honestly, Christy's the one who bought it. It's like Christy looked at those leaky wieners and she said, I'm going medieval on your ass. Like literally, I'm buying the armored version of a garden hose.

This is the one from the infomercial. It's just called Flex Steel. I think there's an infomercial for it. Not Flex Seal the one from the infomercial. It's just called Flex Steel. I think there's an infomercial for it. Not Flex Seal, that's an infomercial. That's for the boats. No, no, I know it's not. When you wanna cut, chop a boat in half and then. Cause there's also infomercials

for the expandable ones too. That's where I fell in love with the idea. And then we ended up with, it's called a No Kink, but it's like, it's made of different stuff than expandable. So it's kind of expandable. Yeah, I can't go there. It's called no kink.

You gotta go kink. I gotta go kink. So it's still kinks. Yeah, because listen, garden hose suck. You can't help, you can't help but kink sometimes. There is, I mean, there's gotta be an answer. And I still haven't found it. I gave up with the third one.

It's not leaking yet, but it is kinking, even though it's called the no kink. Well, I don't have a record of this, because again, I went to the hardware store for, because I do shop local, okay? I believe in that. I went to the hardware store to get, we actually decided on a hose that is

not expandable per se, but like it gets really, it doesn't shrink up, but it's super like flexible. That's what we have. And they're black. Yes, it's called the no kink. Okay, well I've got, we have- That's what we have. We have three of those or four of those around the house. Maybe that works.

And I bought the things to wind it up. Not to like crank it, wind it up, but just like this thing that sits on the side of the house and we just roll it around. Christy wants to get like a piece of pottery that I can just shove it down. Like a snake. Like a decorative, yes,

that's like a cobra coming out of a piece of pottery. You have to play an instrument to get the snake, get this hose to come out. That's the problem with that. I can break out my recorder. We are dadding so hard. Move on to something else. Okay.

Garden hoses, man. Who would've thought? Okay, now I'm going in chronological order. And this, again, this is just the stuff that I thought was notable. I bought this first thing because of you. The Neomed, special link brand. Neomed

Sinu inhaler. Sinu inhaler. What? Sinu inhaler, natural non-medicated aromatherapy inhaler. So this is like, you come into the office and you got something you put in your nose and you sniff. It's a menthol stick, yeah. I got it like two years ago, maybe three,

and the thing still works. Yeah, it's amazing. I used it a few seconds ago. Yeah, so I'm not necessarily- It looks like chapstick that you sew up your nose. But I do find, cause I've got a slightly deviated septum and the right nostril will sometimes be like,

it's not really fully functioning this morning. It's got a little kink in it. That Neomed's gonna open you up. And I do that and I keep it in my bag and I've used it probably a dozen times over the past year and it was a really good purchase. It's super inexpensive. It's kind of like, makes you feel like you're awake.

But have you seen this new product? It's all over the internet right now. And if you're on TikTok or Instagram, you're getting ads for it if you're me. It's called like, something drops, like wake up drops. It's like- I haven't up drops. It's like- I haven't seen this. It's caffeinated?

No, no, I think it's smelling salts. I think it's essentially smelling salts. It's a company that has these things that you sniff. Is it a pouch that you burp? It totally wakes you up. I don't remember the name of it, but everybody, I'm getting a bunch of ads for it because I guess they know that I want that feeling.

I don't know. It's probably toned down from like the ones that EMTs use. I remember when my mom was, would always get her EMT certification, there was the smelling salts day and it's like a little pouch. They would, it's kind of like- You can get them on Amazon.

I think when the policemen get trained in how to use their tasers- You get tased and they smell it. They line up and get tased. Well, the EMTs lined up and they got smell salted. And I was curious and I took one of the pouches and you burst it and you sniff it. And boy, that was an awakening.

Well, it works, man. I mean, it totally works, that was an awakening. Well, it works, man. I mean, it totally works. It was almost painful. And I have to think this is a lesser version of that because you're not knocked out. Well, it doesn't knock you out, it brings you back. And if you say- But you don't use it when you're knocked out,

you use it just when you feel like it. If you just, there's some people who swear by- But you haven't tried this. You haven't tried this. No, but some people swear by smelling salts like before a workout. It's a trend and so these guys got in on that. Yeah, I'm interested in that.

You know, that's akin to the Neal Med menthol sucker. The thing is you don't even use Neal Med brand, do you? Because yours is not Neal Med. It was bought for me and it lasts forever. But it is spelled N-E-I-L. Yeah, I know what you're talking about. I don't know if you got the same brand. I actually had to go through two

and then I landed on this one. The Gista Grill Press Steak Weight Burger Smasher with wood handle. You still are my thunder, man. All the stuff you've gotten, when did you got that early in the year? You didn't tell me. No, I told you about- I forgot.

Like I was on a quest for the perfect smash burger because it's what my kids really, really like. You know, I like a smash burger and a thick burger. I totally, so this happened earlier in the year. Yeah, this is like January. And you told me about it, I totally forgot. Well, at the end of, I think at the end of 2020, I may have even talked about it last year.

I got one, but it wasn't completely flat. It was like, it had a ring on it and it had enough for the burger to like kind of sneak up in there and you couldn't. Yes. So I was like, this is no good. I want one that I can just smash it as thin as I possibly can. As I want it. Right, and when I was, I didn't access this conversation because,

yeah, it was three months ago, I went and got my burger smasher set. And I- You got it set? I got a, first of all, for my green egg grill, I got the half moon griddle. Yeah. So that I could smash the, you can't do that on the grates. I just, yeah, I do it inside in a pan.

And then, yeah, so you gotta get the smasher and you're right, it cannot have a lip so that, because then, yeah, you want it to be smashed out and for the edges to be uneven. You don't want it to be a perfect circle. Yeah, yeah. And you gotta have the right amount of meat and you gotta measure it out, that's dumb.

You gotta really watch out for that. That's the hottest tip I think people are gonna get today from Rhett and Link is your burger smasher cannot have a lip. Yeah. And half of them on Amazon, even highly rated ones do. Yeah, and actually it was difficult. But what did you, because I went with the Gista.

And I liked it because it had a wood handle. I didn't even put the name brand down, but it wasn't, it, mine's fully metal. There's no wood because wood gets stained and it, it looks nicer but- But wood doesn't, wood keeps the heat from coming into your hand. I also do recommend wearing a glove

cause it'll burn the back of your- Oh yeah, you got to burn all the hairs off your knuckles. But we, I mean, I've had some, in fact, that makes me want to do that this week. I've had some really good burger times. You got to get the smash right, but then this is why I got the kit because you also have to have a shaker ready

with everything you need. So like you smash and then you shake on your salt and pepper or whatever your mixture is. It definitely needs, you want it to be salty. And then when you flip it, you flip it and you shake it again. So you gotta have a smasher hand and a shaker hand. And the grill is so hot that I gotta do it fast. So I've got like a shaker that's big.

It's not like, you can't shake on something and shake on something else. You gotta have one shaker that has everything like the deli style. And it's pretty big. So it's like a three inch diameter. You gotta get your ratios right if you do that. But then you're shaking kind of-

I mean, I'm just doing salt. I'm just doing mostly salt and a little bit of pepper. Yeah. And I might put a little garlic powder- A little bit. In the meat before I mix it. But with my grill and with the timing and everything and they grill so fast, I can't regulate it like a stove top.

So it's like, if it gets really hot, you just gotta be fast. So I don't have time to be shaking two things. Well, that's the other thing too. I mean, it's cool to be outside and do it, but I've actually, and I've got like that nice smoker slash grill that I use for a lot of things, but I have transitioned to burgers and steaks inside, man.

I'm doing burgers and steaks inside. I'm doing steak in a pan, you know, because if you go to a fine steak house, they're not grilling there. I just wanna be able to use the grill. They're like, they're doing it on a, well, they're like doing like a broiler, but. It's a challenge to it.

I'm not great at it, because there is timing. The third thing in the kit is an extra wide spatula because when you smash that burger down and it gets, I like to make them really wide. And then you gotta have a real strong spatch that you can just throw underneath that thing and flip it real fast. You cheese them on the grill, right?

Cheese them on the grill. And then the other thing they'll try to sell you in a kit that I opted out of is a cover. We don't need that. Which then you can kind of, to help steam, like you put the, you flip it, salt it, put the cheese on it, and then put a cover on it to like really help it melt.

But I opted out of that. Unnecessary. I thought it was unnecessary. Okay, what else? I love a good smash burger. Oh, so. We're going back to you. Already?

Cause that was me. No, I said, I started that. Your smash was only a smasher. Yeah. You didn't even have the other stuff. And I said, yeah, I got the same thing. No, I mean, I, yeah, I already had like this spatula and stuff.

I'll go again. I got a whole category of stuff. Okay. Related to the cat. It's like, you know, you get another type of animal in the house, like getting a second dog was one thing, but like getting Sokka in the house

and then coming to grips with all the stuff that we needed to do, it's like, okay, now there's that chair that he always sits do. It's like, okay, now there's that chair that he always sits in. There's hair all over that thing. And then Christy's like scratching it with her fingernails. Like there has to be a way. So we got the Chom Chom, which is like a,

it's basically like a lint roller that, then it creates a cat hair log that you open the back of it and this big log of cat hair comes out. And you feed that to your dogs? And then you feed that to the dogs. No, you just feed the cat shit to the dogs, apparently. Yeah, right.

Which brings me to the other thing, which was multiple litter boxes. Yeah. You know, it's like we had just the open cover litter box. If you're a member of the Mythical Society and you come to our monthly AMAs, you've heard me regale this story of, but I'll tell it, go large here on Ear Biscuits.

Jade is not into this, but Jasper loves to eat that cat dookie. Gosh, it's so gross. I'm embarrassed that I've got something in my house that can't help but eat cat shit. Like, I don't know what it says about me, but I feel like it says something about me

that I didn't wanna be. But if you had to choose one being in your house to eat the shit of another being in your house, you would probably pick the animals. Yes. And you'd probably go cat eats, dog eats cat shit. That makes me feel better about it. So we're like trying to get a type of litter box

that Sokka will still use, but that Jasper can't get into. And we went through, we got a big bucket type that like he crawls down inside of it. And then that was working until we noticed that every time I would go upstairs into my walk-in closet in my bedroom, that I would smell, I smelled something that I described as like a meaty smell. I was like, is there something that like,

have I worked out and lost a piece of clothing that has gotten something growing on it? That's like, it's a very deep, dark smell. Meaty? That's almost meaty, but like gross meaty. And then Christy discovered that the duffel bag underneath all of my hanging clothes in my section of the closet has been the depository

of Sokka's pee, not dookie. Sokka has been crawling into that thing and just peeing in my duffel bag. Again and again and again. And we basically traced that to stress related to Lily leaving for college and him not being happy about that. I peed in a duffel bag when I was sad.

So then we had to clean all of that out and we had to buy this angry orange detergent, deterrent is the word. I was about to say, you didn't keep that duffel bag. No, we got rid of the duffel bag. We used some orange detergent on the duffel bag. I now keep all my gym clothes in it. We had to buy angry orange deterrent

to spray on everything that the cat wasn't supposed to be eating or peeing in. Yeah, and then so we sprayed in the area that the duffel bag used to be and then was very diligent about closing our door. But then- Is that why you smell like oranges and not shit now?

Or not piss? Yeah, like meaty cat pee. Yeah. But what we thought was that he wasn't using his litter box but was instead using my duffel bag was because he got too big for the litter box. So then, so now I have this whole purchase history of like buying a bigger litter box that he can jump inside,

but then he still didn't wanna use that. And then when we switched to a bigger litter box that he can jump inside, but then he still didn't wanna use that. And then when we switched to a bigger litter box that he can crawl in the side of, that's when Jasper started eating his dookie. And so it's like one problem leads to another problem. So now I'm on the verge of buying Kitty a litter box that is robotic. Every time Jasper comes up, it just scolds him?

Every time the cat poops, it scrapes it up and puts it in a place. But then it's like, I don't know, the maintenance of that. I don't know, there's lots of questions there. Yeah, but you're already talking about how- It's a lot of trouble. If Lily decides to take the cat with her next year, that you're gonna be sad.

Like, are you gonna fight for this cat? This conversation is giving me renewed perspective because I'm also looking like we bought a calming diffuser that emits the pheromones that a mama cat puts out to make the baby cats not fight with each other that also makes cats chill out. So it's like, we're trying to deal with the cat's stress so that, and then it also attracts the cat

to the area where we want the cat to pee and not in the duffel bag that's no longer there. So there's that, multiple litter boxes, orange stuff, calming diffuser, chom chom hair thing, and a litter genie, which is like a fancy thing that you, as soon as the cat craps, you gotta, we scoop up the crap and we put it in a thing that then it puts it, it's like a diaper genie

but for cat shit. So we got, I like that. I recommend that. You didn't use the robotic one. Haven't gone there yet. Hmm, okay. They're really pricey and I'm also very, I'm also very skeptical

if Sokka's going to go for it or if then he's just gonna start shitting in the plants again, which was the first problem we had. Well, I don't have any cat related purchases. I did, however, buy 40 large pinky mice. What? Oh, you're talking about food for a snake. Yeah.

You still have that snake? Yeah, I mean, he's still a part of the family. Moose, the snake. You bought 40 at a time, you said? He eats 40 at a time. No, he eats like one a week if Shepherd keeps up with it. Yeah, so I have like a handful of mice in the freezer, which Jessie isn't happy about, but they're in a bag.

It's in another bag. There's other animal parts in our fridge that we eat. It's not that big of a deal. I mean, why don't you put it in the fridge in the garage? It is in the fridge in the garage. Okay, that's better. I mean, I'll rattle off a couple here. Sex Criminals Volume One, One Weird Trick.

What? This is a graphic novel. How graphic? Sex Criminals. This is a series about a woman who discovers that when she has an orgasm, that time essentially stops in the afterglow. And then she meets a man who after he orgasms,

the same thing happens and they can interact with each other and do things in the afterglow. This is a famous graphic novel or comic series. What were you googling that you discovered this? I was googling- Can I stop time with my orgasms? Yeah, I was like, yeah, hi. Why does it feel like time has stopped after?

No, I was Googling highly rated graphic novels for a reason, for no reason at all. And so, and I ended up buying this one and a few other ones. I think it misinterpreted the adjective graphic. It's actually not that graphic. It's very funny and it's very well done. I didn't actually, I haven't moved beyond volume one. Not because I don't want to,

but because I feel like I learned what I needed to learn for the purposes that I was trying to learn them. What occasions sitting down to enjoy, what's it called? Sex, crime. Sex Criminals Volume One. One weird trick. Like, is this like a before bed reading?

Is this on your, is this like downstairs by the fireplace? I don't do any reading next to the fireplace. That only happens in movies, man. I mean, you've got a really great place to do some. I bought it for research purposes. And I just read it. I read it in a couple of nights, like a couple of nights. I was like, okay.

Dude, I don't know what you're trying to research, but you're not gonna stop time by ejaculating. No, believe me, I've tried. I do recommend that. I don't know if that's gonna be my rec. I'm gonna pick one of these things to be my official rec, but that was sort of a weird one that stood out when I was like, oh, what did I,

oh, I know why I bought that. And I bought a couple of other ones that are like really well-respected sort of like timeless graphic novels that I actually can't remember where they are at this point. Nothing's been as good as Watchmen to me. I'm a normie when it comes to graphic novels so huh

can I borrow it? yeah sure just put it under your mattress like when Trent gave me that penthouse go back to school with Rogers and get Canada's fastest and most reliable internet perfect for streaming lectures all day

or binging TV shows all night. Save up to $20 per month on Rogers internet. Visit Rogers.com for details. We got you. Rogers. Introducing Tim's new Infuser Energy Beverages made with natural caffeine. They come in two refreshing flavours, Blackberry

Yuzu and Mango Starfruit. Try them today, only at Tim's. At participating Tim's restaurants in Canada for a limited time. It's time for Tim's. Some of these will have some associated background, and some I might just say, and if you have a question about them, ask it. If you don't, I might just move on. Okay?

That's right. This is in reverse chronological order. So I'm starting with the most recent things and going deeper into the year. Backwards. I could have been made it more interesting, but it's this simple. First item, best made dill juice.

Dill juice? Dill juice. D-I-L-L. Okay, you're talking about pickle juice. Yeah. All right, I know what this one is. Right, I told you about this. You made some hot chicken sandwiches at your home.

Right, I made some. This is a sore subject for me. Yeah, well, we can talk about that because your wife had some choice words for you at your get together at your house the other night. I didn't appreciate that. Well, I didn't say anything about it. Well, what you did say was,

tomorrow I'm making hot chicken sandwiches. I've done research and I'm gonna make these at home. Did you know that they brine the chicken in dill pickle juice and that's the secret. Yeah. And I'm doing this tomorrow and we're really excited about it. And I was kind of locked in on Christy

as I was talking about it because I knew that she would care more than anyone else. Oh, and she did. And she was like, I'm excited about it. And I was kind of locked in on Christy as I was talking about it, because I knew that she would care more than anyone else. Oh, and she did, and she was like, I'm excited about it too. Can I get one? Man, I wish, and then she turned to me, she's like, I wish you would do stuff like this. I wish that you would come up with something to cook,

and then the next thing you know, you're cooking it, and then we're eating it. Right, yeah, that's kind of how it works. And I'm like, I didn't know what to say. Well, it's fine because I also closed talking about it with the promise that I'm gonna become like my own little pop-up and I'm gonna be making these things.

Now, I was perfecting this recipe by doing it for my family and boy, I got it right on the first try. And so next time, and I'm gonna do this with when I make brisket and when I make pulled pork, and I'm gonna make more. I believe in this. This doesn't make me mad. I'm gonna make more than I need.

And I'm gonna take some to my friends, including your family for free. And you know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna gladly- Eat it. Take it. But then, if it becomes a thing, I'll be gladly- Eat it. Take it. But then, you know, if it becomes a thing, I'll be gladly to make it our thing that like I could help with, you know, promotion.

It's not a money-making scheme. This is just a generosity thing. And in fact- I can help with the content, the ancillary content. The last piece of the puzzle is pies. I wanna figure out how to make amazing pies. And so I bring you, actually the whole idea, I was gonna call it thighs and pies, I wanna figure out how to make amazing pies. And so I bring you, actually the whole idea, I was gonna call it thighs and pies,

but it's more than just thighs. What about pithighs? It's also barbecue and it's other things. A chicken sandwich that's made with the thigh is the best, man. So, you know- Nobody does that. Lindsey who works with Jesse was at the house last night and she had been at the house during the day

and I got home and I was like, cause I made this this weekend and I had like six pieces of this chicken left over and I got home last night and it was all gone. And I was like, oh, y'all ate all the chicken. And then Lindsay said, and she said, I ate a piece straight out of the fridge cold. She said, that is the best fried chicken

I've ever had in my life. But it's not just fried chicken, it is Nashville hot chicken, right? Yeah. So if you're saying that's the best fried chicken you've had, that's like a different category. Well, you don't, here's the thing. When I finished frying it and I put it in the fridge,

I had not yet, it had like the spicy stuff in the dredge and like coating on it, but it did not have it, the sauce on it, which is a separate step that you do after you take it off the grill. But I didn't want the sauce to make the breading soggy for leftovers. So they just ate it just to straight up chicken. So it kind of comes across like a Bojangles

like Cajun chicken, which is really good. And what did you, you deep fry it? Yeah, yeah, I fried it. Pan fried? I fried it. Pan fried? I fried it in like, you know, like a three quarters inch of peanut oil in a big pan. Okay. So yeah, just like, you know, four minutes, turn it,

that kind of thing. Anyway, that's just one, I mean, I can't, I can't talk about everything that much, but that was a sore spot because your wife is upset about it. I'm gonna just read- She wasn't upset. You might have to decipher what it is I bought because I'm literally that upset about it. I'm gonna just read- She wasn't upset. You might have to decipher what it is I bought

because I'm literally reading word for word the name of the title on Amazon. Okay. Kohler K40090, reveal quiet clothes with grip tight bumpers, round front toilet seat, white. Round front toilet seat? I buy a toilet seat for my boy's bathroom because they are so rough on everything.

They broke it? They broke the toilet seat. Or they permanently stained it. I think they sat too hard on it or maybe they peed too hard on it. Oh God. And it was the kind of thing that two boys in a bathroom with a broken toilet seat turned into two boys in a bathroom with a toilet

with no seat for longer than we should have let that happen. The seat wasn't even on there? No seat. So they only peed in it? Yeah, and they came to my bathroom to take a dump. Or the guest bathroom to take a dump. And it took about six weeks for me to get tired of that. Oh gosh, did you think about getting a cushiony one?

That like, it's got little holes that- Well, it's interesting that you asked this because when the toilet seat came and I said, "'Hey Shep, hey, come here. "'I'm gonna show you how to install a toilet seat. "'This is something somebody, you should know, you know, "'learn from your dad.'" And the first thing he said, he was like,

"'Did you get a good one?' I'm just like, what, what are you, is that, was he thinking about the soft kind? Because I was like, what do you mean? He was like, you know, like a good one. I had a babysitter you get a good one? I'm just like, what? What do you, is that, was he thinking about the soft kind? Cause I was like, what do you mean? He was like, you know, like a good one. I had a babysitter who had a good one. Old people, they'll have a cushiony one and it's- Sometimes they got carpet on them.

Oh my, yes. Well, here's- That's the most unsanitary thing I've ever heard of. I think you're getting something confused. The top has carpet. A lot of old people, they'll put like a crocheted toilet lid cover, but it's not on the seat itself. It's just decorative.

I think that was a fad. I think that the soft toilet seat is asking too much out of life. If you have a crocheted lid and you lift that thing up, you should be expecting a, it's vinyl, I believe. It's like plasticky, but it, and then it has like styrofoam inside of it. And when you sit on it the first time,

it's like, oh, this is pleasant, but then it starts to sprout leaks. And when you sit on it, it'll, Air. Little pinholes of air will just come out around your hips. It feels good though. But then you sink down into hardness. Well, old people have it, I think,

because as you get older, you lose muscle and fat and you got a bony butt. So I don't have a bony butt yet. I will, and at that point I'll get a soft one. Shepherd will be happy. Golden saffron. Let's move on. Finest pure premium all red saffron threads, grade A plus, highest grade saffron for tea, paella,

rice, desserts, no artificial, no preservatives, two grams. So this is a- It's another cooking expedition I've been on. Yeah, a lot of cooking stuff. I'll also just throw in- Big paella. 22 inch carbon steel paella pan, 55 centimeters, bought at the same time.

22 inch? Yeah, so- A two foot diameter? It's a very large paella pan. Now, as you know, out in my grill area, that just made an appearance on Fancy Fast Food. I heard about that. We smoked some stuff for the McRib. I didn't watch it, I wasn't in.

You may not have seen, but I have a big, I got a big burner out there because I wanted the option to make a big paella for a lot of people who come over when the pandemic is over, right? Pandicament. The pan predicament, pandicament. But again, I'm getting my recipes on lock

before I share them with my friends. So I'm testing them on my family. And so- You're really fixating on the hosting component. And I think that is driving your culinary- You know me, I like to create experiences. That's why I did the game night. And I loved, I wanna, and I liked the idea of like,

hey, everybody, we're gonna have this giant ass paella that I made. And I like to experience things. Right. You like to eat things that other people make for you. Listen, so do I. I like to be served. Nothing wrong with that. I like to experience things. Right. You like to eat things that other people make for you. Listen, so do I. I like to be served. Nothing wrong with that. I like to be served.

And as you know, as we talked about on the show, saffron is something that you and I both didn't really like. When they made some kind of saffron dish on the show, we talked about how it tasted like pool water. What I learned is that a little bit, I mean, a tiny bit of saffron goes a very long way. I used this tiny little pinch, like four or five little strands of this stuff

in like a 14 inch paillette. It comes in threads, is that what you read in the? Yeah, yeah, yeah, threads. Like, is it a plant or is it? Well, it's not an animal. Well, because it's golden and it comes in threads, I started to think of it as like something that Rumpelstiltskin would fabric.

It's like that little threads that long. Anyway. It's fabric. I'm on the saffron train because I know that a little bit goes a long way and it just, my first paella, chicken, and also I got rice and chorizo from Spain. And it's absolutely heavenly. I mean, you're gonna love it.

You're gonna absolutely love it. I'll do it for you in the 22 inch pan, which I still haven't used because I used a small pan because I'm not gonna feed my entire family with a 22 inch paella, that's crazy. It gets a bit frou-frou, like the fried chicken. Paella frou-frou? But when you're like, I got the thing from Spain.

If you're gonna do it, do it right. Let me, if I may. You may. When you're hosting people, hold some of the details close to the vest, okay? Because you run the risk of- Oh, I'm not gonna tell them what's in it. Yeah, if you're like, well, you know, I got this,

it's kinda like- Well, I'm not gonna use that voice if I say it. Yeah, you just gotta give them a little bit. If people are really interested, then you can give them a little bit more. But don't just give them everything like, well, I sourced this from Spain and I sourced this from Switzerland

and Rumpelstiltskin himself, I got him on the phone. You wait until you taste. You wait until you taste the Spanish chorizo. Oh gosh. I mean, I'm thinking about it right now. My mouth is watering. Let them, yeah, let us taste it and then see how much of the details we want.

Here's something a little less exciting. I mean, I got a list too. My latest purchase, my biggest purchase of the entire year, I've been thinking about for over a year. And I finally pulled the trigger on it because Christy gave me such a hard time. She's like, just get the television. Oh, that's a big television.

I enjoyed it the other night. I got us on it. Yeah, because the- Not us, I didn't watch us. I didn't watch like Good Mythical Morning. I watched the movie Us on it. Yeah, I was like, you know, the wall in our entertainment room,

my TV was too small. Too small. I didn't say anything about it, but I thought it a lot. It was dwarfed by the wall and by the couch and everything, it just wasn't proportional. But I bought that television for that room. Yeah, that was a good place to watch things. But no, I'm saying I bought the television

that was too small, the one that was in there for years. You went too small too early. I went too small right from the get-go. And then I'm like, I didn't wanna return it. And then I was like, I don't deserve a bigger television, even though this was too small for the room. And then I'm like, every time I watch television, I'm a little mad return it. And then I was like, I don't deserve a bigger television, even though this was too small for the room. And then I'm like, every time I watch television, I'm a little mad about it.

But then I just can't justify buying one of these bigger televisions. The question you should always be asking about a television is, is this too big? Not, is this too small? If you're asking, is this too small? The answer is yes, and you shouldn't buy it. Is this too big?

You're in the right place. You're getting close. Yeah. And you know what you shouldn't buy it. Is this too big? You're in the right place. You're getting close. Yeah. And you know what? I finally did it. A couple of weeks ago, I bought the television and I got the Apple TV. You know the thing that put it over the edge

was when at Mike's house, he's got an Apple TV and I'm like, what is this amazing image on your screen? And it's just a screensaver like- Of a city. Slow-mo drone footage of flying over Los Angeles and you can see- Everything. Inside of, you can see like inside of people's offices.

Like I stood in front of his television- And orifices. And I just watched it and I was like, how do I get one of these? And he was like, well, it's the screen saver. For Apple TV. But it won't look good if it's not 4K. Won't work good.

So I backed into getting this big old television and I gotta say we're enjoying it. And I should have done it years ago. Yeah, think of all the movies that could have been a little bit bigger. A little bit bigger. You'll never get that back. Gotta go back and watch them all. But I thought about it for a year before I actually-

I don't typically think that long. I think that might be your issue. As soon as you think of it, you just gotta do it. LaTerra men's six pack running ankle socks, low cut performance athletic custom cushion tab sock. Okay, so you got some socks. I pull the trigger on these particular socks quarterly because this is my only way to combat the problem

of the missing socks in my family. Now that I've got two boys who are, I mean, Locke especially comes into my room and takes my socks and they typically do not come back. Yeah. These athletic socks that we need for working out or walking or whatever. Yeah.

There's just some sort of monster that eats them. And so I'd have to like reload six pairs quarterly is the only way to just remain socked in my house. Are you still doing the plan that we talked about a while back that was like, they're all the same type and they're all the same color? Cause I've done that for the most part and I love it. And then your kids socks are different?

Lincoln has the same socks. Yeah. Lincoln and I basically share the socks. Well, yeah, that's what me and Locke do. And I'm sure Shepherd is getting, he's getting close to being a part of that. Yeah. So they're all the same color.

Essentially, yeah, I mean, these are all just white ankle socks. And then I've got like black crew socks, and those are basically the only socks that I wear. You know what? I actually bought some socks too. Oh. In preparation for-

Is that one of your four? Me and Christy's trip. Actually, it's not, no. I was like, I'm not gonna put socks on the list. I mean, I'm sure Rhett wouldn't like be talking about something like socks. Yeah, I'm not gonna do that. I got some hiking socks and I got some for me and I got some for Christy.

They kinda matching. She hated them. But I was like, you know, they're very functional. Hiking socks are important. They're kind of matching. She hated them. But I was like, you know, they're very functional. Hiking socks are important. They're important. Lifeboard, portable floor to enhance yoga, Pilates or ballet, barre, exercise at home on carpet or outdoors.

Portable floor? Yeah. So a hard floor to go over carpet, but there's no carpet in your house. This was for my solo trip and any subsequent camping trip. I have to do my back exercises every single morning. And I was like, when I went camping, when I did my solo trip,

before this most recent solo trip, I didn't have anything and I was out next to Joshua Tree and I found a piece of plywood that someone had put next to a fire. And I took that plywood and I did all my back exercises on the plywood. Cause you're having to put your knees and then lay down on the ground.

Yeah, I have to do all this stuff that you gotta be on a hard surface. And so it turns out they make this plastic thing that again is for people who are like, I'm gonna go do Pilates in the grass in Central Park. So I wanna have like a board to do it or whatever. It rolls up? It's just two pieces that fit together like this,

like they kind of come together. Did you use it? Yeah, I used it. It's so, I gotta figure out a better way to travel with it. When I'm doing the solo trip, it was no big deal because I got so much room in the car for myself, but we're going camping with the boys soon and I have to take it

and I don't know exactly what I'm gonna do. You could also use it as a sun shield when you park on the windshield. It's too big. But you can't store it there. You could strap it to the roof. I thought about that, but I got the tent up there and it's just like, I gotta put it under it or something.

You know what, put it in the attic underneath that big bowl you bought. Give me another one. Okay. And then I'll hit you with one. Gacinto men's casual cotton shorts, three quarter jogger capri crop pants, below knee shorts with pockets light gray 34.

Okay, so long shorts,orts that go past your knee. Capri pants, I bought capri pants. Call it shorts, which helps. But if you wanna call it capri pants, go for it. I like being comfortable. Have I seen you wear these? No, I wear them at the house sometimes. Do they have a drawstring or do they kind of cinch at the ends?

Or are they just flapping? Just like sweats. How's that going for you? They're comfortable. I enjoy them. I, you know, as the weather begins to cool down, I can do my stretches outside in these. But your calf still stays cool?

Yeah, but my knees are very warm. Okay. Next thing I bought was Utopia KR scissors, silver, 899. was Utopia KR scissors, silver, 899. Now these things are professional grade texturizing scissors with finger inserts. If you have small fingers, you put these finger inserts in there so that it's still tight on your finger.

This is a scissor that it only cuts half of your whatever's in it. So it's like tight on your finger. This is a scissor that it only cuts half of your whatever's in it. So it's like a thinning shear. Yeah. I've seen Ana use these on both of us. And I was watching her closely and then I'm like, you know what? I'm cutting my own hair in quarantine

and my hair is so thick, I gotta up my game. Right. So I had to buy some of these. It's a bit scary to use a thinning shear because- Because you get close to the base and you cut and it feels like- And then you cut- Cut and comb.

And then you comb it out and all of a sudden, a huge clump of hair comes out. That's like, I mean, a handful. And then you just- You sure you're doing it right? You keep doing it. I mean, your hair looks the same. Well, Ana has now cut my hair again in the parking lot.

So I'm not doing it anymore, but- But you are ready, you can. Oh, it definitely helped. Right. But it takes guts, man. It takes approximately- I wouldn't do it. The same amount of guts it takes for me to purchase a wallet or a television or anything really

to cut, to thin out my own hair. But now you're ready for any situation in which, and you could cut my hair. You used to cut my hair for a very long time. I'd gladly cut it. Are you making a suggestion? No, no, no, nothing. What else did you buy?

Well, I will just say quickly, I'm not gonna read the whole thing because it's too long, but I did buy phone screen protectors. I think I talked about this earlier. I just found that the screen protectors and the phone cases that you get when at your provider, like if you are like an AT&T, Verizon, whatever,

and you buy that stuff along with your phone, you're gonna pay really, really high prices for all this stuff. Like one of those glass, like tempered glass screen protectors will be like 35 bucks if you buy it at the store, but you can get a three pack on Amazon. Let's see, what is the price of this thing?

Three pack for 15.99. See for 16 bucks, you get three. This is something that I know. I mean, for years, I will be in a place looking for something and I'll be on my phone looking at it from somewhere else, just because I'm like, man, I can either have it right now

or I could probably get it for 10% cheaper online or get a slightly different one or at least feel validated in my purchase. And then I'll do that. And even when it comes to like phone cases or screens, I'll go through all of that trouble. And then you know what I'll do that. And even when it comes to like phone cases or screens, I'll go through all of that trouble. And then you know what I'll do? I won't buy anything.

That's like getting ready to watch Netflix and you don't end up watching anything. Yeah, you just look at the menu. Right, don't be that. I mean, I don't have a, there's no screen protector on my phone. I mean, I do have a case, but I don't have a screen. I got that case for $7.

$7 case. I got this. You see but I don't have a screen protector. I got that case for $7. $7 case. I got this- You see, it's just as good as anything. I got this screen protector for $0 because I don't have one. That's an even better deal. Exactly. Seasense Air Horn Jumbo, eight ounce.

Eight ounce air horn? What do you mean? Like, so like a canned air? Yeah, this is from my rap career that's on the side. Mark, mark, mark, mark, mark. I got this emergency horn for boating when I went on my solo trip. It's just a general sort of survival thing.

Also, it's been shown to be effective in scaring away mountain lions or bears, but I also got bear spray, which incidentally, you cannot get on Amazon because they will not ship it to me in California. And I don't know if that's a state thing. I mean, they sell it on Amazon. So the only way to get bear spray is to buy it

from a retail store like REI and then go pick it up. I got that too, but that's not one of my purchases. So did you walk around with a belt with bear spray and a horn on? I didn't end up hiking. I couldn't, the place that I needed it, I couldn't get into because the National Forest were closed, but I didn't know that was gonna be the case before

because of the fires. Did you blast the horn just to test it? No, cause I feel like that's like a fire extinguisher and I didn't, you know. Yeah, yeah, it's- Limited pressure. It's eight ounces. You don't wanna-

I don't know how many seconds that translates into. Yeah, what's a blast? You should have bought two just so you'll know how long you have to blast. Along that same line, the next three purchases, which I'll go through quickly, were all from my solo trip. Atomic Bear Paracord Bracelet, two pack.

Atomic Bear? So that's just the brand, but this is basically a little bracelet that's got a fire starter built into it. And also like a paracord, you know, it's just like, so you're completely ready for anything. And this is what I was gonna do if I was gonna go in. What would you use with a paracord?

Like a parachute string? Having rope, I've been told, is very important when you're in a survival situation. I don't exactly know what I would use it for, but I think if my life depended on it, I would figure it out real quick. Apparently rope is very important because it's in all these survival things.

But you don't even know how you would use it. You bought a bracelet. I bought a bracelet that was a fire starter. Yeah, and it also has a loud whistle and an emergency knife all built into just the bracelet. I didn't know what kind of stuff I was gonna get into. And it was real cheap. Also got a 6.5 foot pop-up changing shower privacy tent,

portable utility shelter, room for camping, shower, toilet, bathroom, trade shows, beach spray tan pop-up. beach spray tan pop-up. Beach spray tan pop-up. Green. Yeah. Okay, so basically a shower curtain for camping. Yeah, because I was gonna be taking showers and pooping just next to my car

and I didn't know where I was gonna go. How did that go? I never pooped or showered in a place where somebody could see me. So I just showered and pooped in the open. So you didn't use it? I opened it up one time to be like, let's see what this feels like.

Okay. I'm bringing it on our trip. Did you start a fire with your... No, I couldn't, the fires were illegal. You couldn't start fires. See, and I don't like being this guy. Like what I'm doing to you right now, I do to myself and it's not, nothing good comes of it. Like whenever I have to shop for something

or whenever I find myself shopping, I'm making a decision as if I have to defend myself to somebody. Like I'm treating you the way I feel like someone will treat me with every single purchase. Like I'm gonna be grilled and have to justify everything. Seriously. Like that's how I interact.

You're justifying it to yourself. But that's not how it feels in my brain. It actually feels like I'm gonna be, what's the word where somebody in a courtroom is asking a lot of questions? Interrogated. Yeah. It's interesting though. That's more of where somebody in a courtroom is asking a lot of questions? Interrogated. Yeah. It's interesting though.

That's more of like a criminal. It's interesting because- But yeah, that's how, it's an inner critic thing. Well, again, the ever- And here I am putting it on you. The ever teased Enneagram episode. We're both self-prez. I'm a self-prez three, you're a self-prez one.

And I think that's one of the reasons that, I mean, I'm also an impulse buyer, but what I do is I tend to envision a scenario and I think about all the things that I need to have and be prepared for. And then I'm like, oh man, I'm gonna be like camping next to somebody. I'm gonna need this, I just bought this toilet

that it's basically this bag I'm gonna take a shit in. I don't want somebody to watch me do this. I wonder if there's some sort of privacy thing. Yeah. And all of a sudden, there it is for 20 bucks and you just buy it. And the fact that you didn't use it is not, it doesn't make you feel bad about the purchase. I want to have everything,

I wanna be completely prepared. Hashtag Ear Biscuits. We'll be back at you next week. And remember, let us know what you think by sending us your voice. 1-888-EAR-POD-1 Hey, my name's Justin. I just thought I'd reach out.

I just started listening to your podcast. Six foot seven. And I really feel like me and Rhett have a tall connection to where I can feel the sensitivity

of his tallness emanating from wherever he's at on this earth we'll leave it at that have a great day just know I'm always feeling that tall connection