Ear Biscuits with Rhett & Link - Reacting to Your Ghost Encounters | Ear Biscuits Ep. 355

Episode Date: October 24, 2022

Ever been attacked by a ghost? Maybe it just wanted to sharpen up on its piano skills? Or maybe it's part of your family now? With Halloween right around the corner, we asked you to share your spookiest and most disturbing experiences. This week, Rhett and Link are listening to your voicemails and there’s a pretty good chance they’ll have a hard time sleeping after this. Want to hear your voice on Ear Biscuits? Call 1-888-EAR-POD1 and we might just play your call on an upcoming episode! To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This, this, this, this is mythical. Shop Best Buy's ultimate smartphone sale today. Get a Best Buy gift card of up to $200 on select phone activations with major carriers. Visit your nearest Best Buy store today. Terms and conditions apply. Welcome to Ear Biscuits, the podcast where two lifelong friends talk about life for a long time. I'm repped.

What just happened? Something in your throat? I'm battling, I'm fighting off, it's not COVID, just so you know. There's a very mild cold that's going through my household and I'm like in day three of fighting it and this is as bad as it's gotten. It's like every once in a while,

just a slight scratch in my throat. Well, I don't want to get it, dude, because- It already happens in your family, is what Christy told me. Because I, we're, Chris and I have a romantic getaway this weekend and I don't wanna be hacking and thinking about the fact that you gave me something, so don't do this.

Even in its worst, all it got to for Shepherd was like a sore throat for a day and then went away. So, and I'm tougher than he is. And so the worst that it's gotten for me is this slight impacting my speech. So as long as you can still, if your voice cracks a little bit when you're making love to your wife,

I think that that's totally acceptable. Acceptable. Yeah, it's just kind of part of the reckless abandon of the weekend. One day, Shepard's gonna be stronger than you and it's gonna happen a lot quicker than you think. And I'm Link. This week at the Roundtable of Dim Lighting,

we're talking about your most disturbing slash spooky experiences, because that's the prompt that we put out when we tweeted. We wanna hear about your most disturbing slash spooky experiences. Give us a call and share your story at 1-888- EarPodOne. And here we are reading, not reading,

we're listening to these. And you can also use hashtag your biscuits and we will read the stuff that you send. One of the more disturbing things that has happened to me in the past five minutes is seeing you sit down with a Starbuck. Just so you know, when you have one serving of a Starbucks thing, it's a Starbuck.

Okay. Okay. So you have a Starbuck and the name on it is Blake, which is just so- That's my name. I mean, it's just amazing. Now what, did you say Link? I said Link. I mean, this is such a trope.

I mean, but it's amazing to me. Link, Blake. Blake, Blake, Blake, Blake, Blake, Blake, Blake. I mean, it doesn't really matter. I was in the drive-through. Oh, oh. It wasn't like they even had to call. Oh yeah, yeah, drive-through they don't care. But they're gonna call out Blake,

you would never go to that. I would never go to, yes I would. I'm going to right now. Well, if they said Blake, you'd go up and you'd be like, Link? Oh, I guess. Is there a Blake here? Because Lily works at a Starbucks now,

I'm totally on the employee side of this. They can't help it. I'm not gonna criticize it or, my feelings aren't hurt. employee side of this. I'm not gonna criticize it or my feelings aren't hurt. I think the thing that's more disturbing than you being called Blake is the fact that you have a Starbucks. Like you don't, you're so routine oriented that anytime anybody around here is like, hey, we're getting Starbucks, you're like, no thanks.

Like, so what series of events led you to going to Starbucks and going through the drive-through and getting a coffee for Blake? You know what, Rhett? How did this happen? I feel very seen right now, thank you. I've never seen you with one of these, except for like a set on something we're working on. I pass by the Starbucks

and there's this line going to that drive-through and I just always look at it with disdain because it's clogging up my exit artery to get to work and I'm never getting in that line. For the first time ever today, I got in that line. I hit snooze. You know, we had a dinner last night. I was there.

Gosh, I just, I was telling you I ate too much. Talk about a horror story, disturbing and spooky experience. Just too much decadent sauciness. You didn't even, you're the only one that took home a doggy bag. Did you see, first of all, this place served food, at least your food and my food were served in a dog bowl. Yeah, it was like a-

Like if you're gonna get a bowl for like a large dog, like we're talking German Shepherd and up, that was what we were served in. Yeah. And mine, I mean, you know who I am. I saw lobster risotto on the menu and I was like, "'Check please' or whatever, yes please." And I love the fact that you and Christy play this game

where it's like, you know what, like what, she knew what I was gonna do. She always knows what you're gonna order because it's what she almost orders. She almost got it. And it had one pound of lobster in it. I ate every damn bit of it. I got the shrimp.

Just like a dog. Shrimp Alfredo penne pasta, it was amazing. But yeah, I got to a point where I was just eating the shrimps. Yeah, so much pasta left. But we had so many appetizers. What I'm saying was I felt kind of bad going to sleep and then I felt bad when I woke up.

Me too. It was a gut hangover. Yeah. And so I just kept hitting snooze. I did not want to try to like, I didn't want my body to go upright. And so that set me on a path of like being kind of in a tizzy because I'm up against dropping Lando off

at a specific time. I can't actually be late for that because he can't stand it if I drop him off late. So then I had made my smoothie at the last second and I did decide to eat my smoothie, even though no part of me wanted to. Was it a rush smoothie? It was a rush.

And I didn't eat it with a spoon? I made a coffee at the same time. I still ate it with a spoon. And. So you ate a smoothie- I was in a real hurry. In a rush with a spoon. Yeah, yeah. I'm really glad I wasn't there for that.

It just makes me feel like there's still some sanity in my life. You know how gravity and throats work, right? It's like liquids, throats, and gravity. I know. A science project by Rep McLaughlin. So Link will know how to drink a smoothie. Yeah, it does say a lot that like,

as in a hurry as I was, I was still gonna do that. But I had made my coffee in parallel as opposed to what I normally do, which is eat my smoothie out of my coffee mug after I finished my coffee an hour earlier. Really? Yeah, I drink my coffee right when I get up and then I go get ready and then I come back down

and I make my smoothie and I pour it in my coffee mug. Your whole smoothie fits in your coffee cup? No, I have to pour it twice. So there's less, there's- Is that so you have less to clean up? Yes. You want your coffee to taste, you want your smoothie to taste a little coffee-

No, there's less to clean up. I had to make my coffee in parallel this morning with my smoothie that went into a cup. And then I just ran out the door and I forgot my coffee because I usually have drunk my coffee earlier. I never take a coffee in the car. Okay, what's the over under on you having your wallet right now?

I'm gonna say that there is a 75% chance you do not have your- I have my wallet. You do have your wallet? How did that happen? Because when we drove home last night, I took it out of my pocket and I put it in the console. Oh, so it was have your ID. I have my wallet. You do have your wallet? How did that happen? Because when we drove home last night, I took it out of my pocket and I put it in the console. Oh, so it was in your car. I keep my wallet in my car, yes.

That's where I keep it. So whenever we go somewhere in your car, that's why I never have my wallet. So if somebody steals your car, they can also steal your identity. Just good thing to note. Yep. And I-

They get a little two for one. And I usually leave my keys in my car too. Right. So it's like I just make it easy. They could also get in your house. It's just like, yeah. They can just assume your life. And there's a mask of me in the glove box.

If you steal Link's car, you can just take over his whole life. There's like a very realistic mask of my face. But you're gonna have to drink that damn smoothie every morning with a spoon. With a spoon. Eat it with a spoon, sorry. As long as you do that,

my family will not notice the difference. Like kill me, put on my mask, just don't ever think about drinking a smoothie without a spoon and you know what? You'll be living the life, man, because I have quite a life. I haven't been able to calibrate my life since I'm trying once again,, the thing I tried last year,

where I'm eating in a restricted window from like noon to 8 p.m., right? And so not eating in the morning means I'm not getting my smoothie in the morning. And I believe that the smoothie had a bunch of nutrients that now I'm probably not getting from other meals. That's gotta become your lunch or your dinner, dude. And so I'm just, I'm a little bit torn.

That's why I forced myself to eat the smoothie this morning. Plus there's like, I put so much flaxseed in that thing. It's the only thing that like, I count on that to keep me regular. I don't wanna go there, but. Yeah, I don't know. I haven't straightened it out yet. You're missing out, dude.

Oh, well, I need to get some of that. I had some of that green stuff. We don't have a sponsor. Like everyone is sponsored by Athletic Greens. Maybe we should be. So, but I use something else other than Athletic Greens that is also not a sponsor, but I ran out of it. But it's essentially like powder

that I think just makes you feel like a super person. But I ran out of that, so maybe that's why I got a little scratchy throat. You talking about cachava? No, I'm talking about green. That's what I use. Not a sponsor. Similar stuff. They should be a sponsor. Yeah, we need to get one of these sponsors.

One of these green sponsors, and I'll start doing it again. Summer's here, and you can now get almost anything you need for your sunny days delivered with Uber Eats. What do we mean by almost? Well, you can't get a well-groomed lawn delivered, but you can get a chicken parmesan delivered. A cabana? That's a no.

But a banana? That's a yes. A nice tan? Sorry, nope. But a box fan? Happily, yes. A day of sunshine? No. A box of fine wines? Yes. Uber Eats can definitely get you that. Get almost, almost anything delivered with Uber Eats. Order now.

Alcohol in select markets. Product availability may vary by Regency app for details. I want to get into a voicemail. Do you? Yeah. All right. Before you play it, I think we need to take the coast to coast approach here.

Okay. Which is you don't shit on any of this. Like the Reddit approach, which I'm not a huge fan of Reddit, but the thing I do like about Reddit is when people tell a story, you're not really supposed to question whether or not they're lying.

Yeah, yeah. What's the point of that? We're choosing to believe that all these things happen to you and we're not gonna try to poke hoes into your, hoes. We're not gonna poke hoes or holes into your story. Yeah, what's a hole in a hose called? A ho-hole.

A ho-hole? It's for the dirt to go through. Yeah. Like, I don't know. I'll play it. You know, like a rip in pantyhose. That's all I'm talking about here. Hey, Renly.

So the creepiest thing that ever happened to me, I lived in a haunted house when I was in high school, and I would see this little girl pretty much all the time, and a bunch of my family members saw her, my friends saw her. Um, but the creepiest thing that happened is we were outside watching a tornado and, uh, I came back inside. I looked down the hall and this girl is walking down the hall and and she's probably three and a half foot tall. And as she gets closer, I realize that she doesn't have a face. And she floats up to me and floats right through me and disappeared. And that's probably the creepiest thing that I've ever experienced.

Man, I got a little bit. My cackles stood up. What is that when it happens? Your cockles. Cockles, no, my cockle's fine. I think it's cockles. My cockle did not respond to that story. My cackles.

Well, I mean, the fact that halfway through this story, it's about, there's a tornado in it, and the story's not even about the tornado. Yeah, yeah, yeah, sit watching the tornado. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Watching the tornado. Yeah, we got this haunted house with a little woman in it. Turns out to be faceless. We were outside watching a tornado once.

Like, hey, I feel you. I feel that. Like, if a tornado was coming up, I think I would really wanna watch it, but, and then just as long as I know where I'm gonna run. If you've got a basement of sorts. But then you come back inside, this is what we talked about last week, man.

Man. You got the little woman or the girl. Cause this is a common story, a faceless little girl. This is a common thing where people see a person of a certain type, right? Even down there at the hotel in Chester, Arkansas that our good friends Lance and Lacey run, there's a story of a guy who died there

and there's like, I don't know all the details, but multiple people will see that guy, right? And so of course there's the power- The multiple people thing, that's- Well, there's a, you know, the power of suggestibility, the power of suggestion, if like, okay, if I'm gonna see, but again, I choose to, this happens so often,

I choose to believe that people are seeing, they are seeing something that is coming across to them like they're seeing a little girl without a face in this sense, floating through him. What would you do? I mean, I just don't, I don't think I could stand there and let a ghost fly through me because right before she floats through me,

she's floating right up to me. You know, that's a flee situation. I mean, or play dead or something. You know, it's like, I've never had any experience like this but I just, I don't know what I would do. Do you wanna have one? No, no. Well, to me, I'm of two minds. One is, of course, I don't want to be scared.

I kind of do actually. But it's more seeing that would be a super cool thing and it would change my worldview because my worldview right now is that, something must be going on, but I just really doubt that it is ghosts or whatever. I heard somebody talking about that these paranormal things are related to echoes in time.

We don't understand everything there is about the nature of time and space, right? Okay. And we've got like every, you know. I know I don't. And I, yeah, I mean, I've read some popular science books where they try to explain it to people like me who are not studied, but the idea of essentially

everything that's ever happened is always happening. So you're basically like, at times you're running into other things that have happened in that space. So it isn't necessarily like this little girl died, her soul remained around and she's haunting the house. I mean, maybe, again, I don't know. But what would you do in that scenario?

Now, I think it is important to know that like, they felt like she was there. This wasn't the first experience. A tornado is coming, by the way. I just can't, at a certain point, you're like, yeah, there's a girl here. We live with her. She just floated through me.

Doesn't have a face. At a certain point, you just kind of like have to live with it, I guess. But I just don't think. Well has anybody ever been beat up by a ghost? I would run. But why? Has anybody ever been killed by a ghost?

I don't know. Okay, okay. Brian said we've got a story, okay. Oh gosh, we got someone who died? Which number? Number 20. Oh, number 20, all right. Well not died, but I mean. All right, 20. Oh, number 20? Well, not died, but...

Alright, let's listen to number 20 then. Hi, my name is Vivi and I'm a big fan. So this actually happened to my mom, but me and my dad were there to witness it. We were moving out of this totally creepy house. We didn't even last there six months. It was so creepy.

One of these creepy things we would hear were these footsteps that would just run across the hallway upstairs. It was so creepy. One of these creepy things we would hear were these footsteps that would just run across the hallway upstairs. It was just like these da-da-da-da-da-da noises. And at the time, we just convinced ourselves that it was our cat. I think we were in denial. We really wanted to believe it was just a cat. Anyway, we were moving out. Me and my dad left. We came back. My mom was still at the old house. And when we came back, we hear this loud toe-curling scream come from upstairs. Me and my dad freak out. We run upstairs where we find my mom lying on the ground like negative energy. She felt like she was just frozen. She couldn't move. She suddenly felt like this heavy feeling in her chest.

She couldn't breathe. She tried to pray. And when she tried to pray, she felt something like grab her and pull her down and just scratch her whole body. She looked up and she saw these cracks starting to form in the ceiling. And that really freaked me out because I told my mom, like, I used to see starting to form in the ceiling. And that really freaked me out because I told my mom, like, I used to see these cracks form in the ceiling. I didn't mention it before because I was a teenager. So I assumed that they would assume the worst if I just, you know, oh, there's cracks forming in my ceiling, whatever. So anyway, we were like,

we need to get out of here. Like, we just, we're just done. Like, let's just go. I'm pretty sure we forgot some stuff. As we were leaving and walking out the door, we hear these footsteps upstairs go. Da-da-da-da-da-da-da. So, yeah, totally wasn't the cat. As we were in the car, my mom pulled up her pants, and she had these unexplained scratch marks going down her legs. So, yeah, that's our scary story. Good gracious. They do attack.

And they also really mess up your drywall. Yeah, man, that's why you gotta have them popcorn ceilings in your haunted house to cover up for the cracks. Okay, I have a physical reaction when I hear these stories. I get, like, look. I go into complete denial. I don't even wanna. The hair stands up on my, like.

I'm not engaging. The hair stands up on my arms. It's so freaky, man. You know what? I believe them, you know? They don't seem, she seems so level-headed, you know? They don't seem, she seems so level-headed, you know? Yeah, man, I mean- If she was my doctor, I would take the prescriptions.

You know, I would trust this voice. Too many people who I trust have had experiences that they can't explain that I'm sure somebody smarter than me could explain why it was just their mind playing tricks on them. But I just- Well, you know what? I can't, Rhett. But I just don't think that's an adequate explanation.

I think there's something that we don't understand that's happening. I mean- Yeah. So what would you do? Because I've never lived in a haunted house. I've never had an experience like this, but there's been a few times when I've been alone

in my own home. And I think maybe a couple of times when I've been in like a house alone, that wasn't my own home, and I think maybe a couple of times when I've been in like a house alone that wasn't my own home, and that same feeling that I just got when she was telling that story, it'll happen to me and I'll start freaking myself out. But it comes from within. It's all from anticipation and me imagining

what might happen, but I've never experienced anything. I don't know what I would do. Some people just are like, yeah, we have this particular presence in our house and it's weird and it's something we talk about, but we don't feel like we should leave. I'd leave this situation. This is a little bit different.

When the family's united and the mama's been scratched. When mama gets scratched, you don't look back. Don't look back. Let's go to this one. Hey Rhett and Link. So I had a spooky encounter when I was in high school or college. There was the music and arts building in my college

that had a small reputation of being haunted. And I was a bit of an insomniac, so I did all my practicing in the middle of the night. So one random Thursday night, I went to practice at around 2 a.m., and when I went up to the top floor where all those practice rooms are for everyone to practice, expecting it to be empty, I heard someone practicing piano, and I thought,

okay, I've got a fellow friend insomniac here. But I got a little curious after I practiced for a bit and they were still going, so I went over to see who it was and there was nobody in the room. And I sprinted out of the building and then got over it and practiced there every night for the rest of my college career, but it was still very terrifying. So did not love that. Sprinted out of the building. Yes, right answer. Coming back every other time you wanted to practice, strange application. Why does that have to be the answer?

The only thing this ghost did was play piano. That's an olive branch. Okay. That's a ghost saying, I love music too. Did you hear that? What was that noise? I think it was my cat. I don't believe my,

you talking about my stomach growling really loudly right now? Yeah. I don't think this mic picked up on it. Maybe it did, I don't know, it was pretty loud. It's that meal we ate last night. It's that risotto trying to find its way. Risotto.

I don't know because first of all, totally get being scared. I would be scared. I'm not saying that I would do this, but if there were a ghost that was playing the piano in a room and you knew that this piano was being played, would be like- Whip out your phone.

Yeah. That's what you would want. I think they know that. I think they know. I think the ghost protocol is to not, isn't that like a Mission Impossible ghost protocol? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think the ghost protocol is to not, isn't that like a Mission Impossible ghost protocol? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think the ghost protocol is to not let iPhones catch you.

They know that. Android? That's like the orientation. It goes to orientation is like, people break out the phones, you stop playing the piano. Oh. Okay. But I don't know, like what were they trying to know. What were they trying to do?

What were they trying to prove? I, you know, again, I'm trying not to pick it apart. It makes me feel better to pick it apart, but we've said we're not going to do that, so now I don't have anything to say. Wherever you're going, you better believe American Express will be right there with you. Heading for adventure? We'll help you breeze through security. Meeting friends a world away? You can use your travel credit.

Squeezing every drop out of the last day? How about a 4 p.m. late checkout? Just need a nice place to settle in? Enjoy a room upgrade. Wherever you go, we'll go together. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Visit amex.ca slash yamx. Benefits vary by card. Terms apply. I'm just going to play another one.

Hi, I'm here to tell you my spooky story. This is also a completely true story. Basically, the summer before seventh grade, my friends and I, there were four of us, we decided to do a Ouija board at her grandmother's house. So there were four of us in the room, but only three of us went to the Ouija board. The fourth girl decided to just text her mom. And she was like, oh, they're going to do Ouija board. And she goes, oh, don't do it. It was when I did it with my friends, we were about your age, and it was a horrible idea. Like, we had to get a priest to, you know, help us out. And we're like, okay, that's terrifying, but whatever, we're still going to do it. So we put our hands on it and it all starts moving.

And we're like, what the heck? Like, that's so, what's going on? And it gives us these random numbers, maybe a few letters. So we asked her to look it up because she was on her phone anyways. And we get a highway code in Portland and we're we're like okay that is just random whatever it doesn't matter um but then her she tells her mom that and her mom goes my friend who we were trying to contact died in a car crash on a highway in portland or it died on a car crash in portland and we're like okay that's freaky like what um so later we get nine two three the numbers um and we're like okay that's freaky like what um so later we get nine two three the numbers um and we're like okay what what does that mean like we're thinking you know nine two three maybe that was the license plate you know blah blah blah she goes my friend died on september 23rd and now we're

like freaking out we're like this is crazy but we don't get anything after that so you know this is august right now we're like we need to look out for September 23rd. See if anything happens. You know, something is going on. And the friend who hosted it on that day, September 23rd, finds four dead birds in her backyard. And there were four people in the room. It's crazy. It was crazy. It was crazy.

It was crazy. So that's it. That's my spooky story. Hope you enjoy. If this were a movie, I wouldn't have ended there. You know, they would have figured out a way to like write the rest of the movie. Four Dead Birds does not make an ending.

An ending does not make, is what you're trying to say. Yes. See, how do I not just say things like, well, you know, Ouija boards, just like psychics, it's like, first of all, it's cooperation of people. And then it's just numbers, which like, just finding some random stuff

and then making meaning out of it. But I'm not gonna go there. It's impossible not to. Again, I wanna go there as well. I think one of the ironic things- I didn't go there. Is that we don't, we did not, I just think it's an interesting tidbit.

When we were Christians and believed vehemently in the supernatural and believed that there was a war going, now we weren't charismatic, you were very reformed. I was pretty reformed. And in that tradition, there's not a lot of talk of demons and angels and stuff. There's this belief that they exist, but they're not very active or, you know.

So we tend to have an almost naturalistic view of the supernatural world, even within the Christian tradition. It's kind of fascinating. And so any of this Ouija board shit, I just was like, this is just people making connections. I don't think that the devil is wasting his time with Ouija boards.

It just feels like a dumb distraction. Is what I thought as a Christian. It's actually post faith when I'm in this place where I'm like, listen, I realize now how little, I just had this very narrow slice of my interpretation of reality and now I'm just like, there's so many things that I don't understand. And so I actually have more of an openness to there being some legitimacy to these people's experiences,

but still the skeptic in me goes to this place of what you're saying, which is, you're gonna get some numbers, everybody's moving it. It's not like, a Ouija board doesn't work by you placing the little glass on it and then everybody stands back and it moves on its own. Like, can't a ghost do that too? Or can a demon do that?

So there's always these little things that like, oh, well people are moving it around. I think it would, like if I found out that my kids were at a slumber party and they were like doing this, a Ouija board, I mean, I think my first thing would be like, oh, was it scary, was it fun? You know, I would interact with it like a game, like the board game that it's sold as.

Yeah, it's in Walmart, right? Yeah, probably in Walmart. But going back to our worldview and how it impacted things and it just kinda like, we just weren't interested in it. I think it's because we actually did believe that we were, we had, I'm gonna say experiences, maybe interactions with Satan or his minions, his demons.

Temptations or whatever. Just talking about like temptation, like being, believing lies. There was a lot of language and teaching around associating things like that with an interaction with the dark side, with like, with Satan, right? So it's okay, I'm not gonna give into the power of Satan, but he's around.

So it's not like, it's kind of like I live in a, yes, Satan can be here, but I have this belief that through Jesus, I have power over Satan and not in like a exorcist or vampire with a cross kind of way. That's not how we thought about it. We didn't think about it that way, but we thought about it in a very cerebral,

logical kind of way that's like, you know, I didn't spend too much time thinking about Satan, but if you press me, I would say, yeah, like I'm supposed to not listen to Satan, not given to temptation and I can be delivered from evil by God, right? So I think this level of proximity that we believed in, you know, it was like, okay, this experience makes sense, but it's also kind of safe and it doesn't have this,

like Satan's never gonna, or his demons aren't gonna scratch me or send some ghost after me or something. And I was told many times that, hey, you don't need to worry about demons. Like you don't need to worry about being possessed because a demon can't come into you because the Holy Spirit's inside of you already.

So that was comforting. But, because I always thought- And I think because of that, it was like, okay, I'm not gonna, I'm not really interested in Ouija boards because I know how Satan or his, whoever his minions are, interact with me in my everyday life and it's just something that I've been able to come to grips with and not be afraid of and not dwell on,

but also not seek out. Like that's the thing is that you don't wanna start seeking this out because then you're flirting with it as like demonic activity as something that could be fun. It's the same reason that we were too old for Harry Potter, as like demonic activity as something that could be fun. It's the same reason that we were too old for Harry Potter, but yeah, we were on the fringes of that movement that was like, if we were younger, our parents wouldn't have allowed us to read Harry Potter

because of the sorcery. And I think my view was always, I think that if Satan existed and at the time I definitely believe that he did, that he was super crafty and super smart. So it'd be like, what's more strategic? And I would say it's more strategic for Satan to have some sort of subtle influence over this professor

that I'm going to this class and he is causing me to doubt my worldview. He's causing me to doubt the truth of Christianity, the legitimacy of the resurrection or whatever. Like this religion professor is saying these things that are challenging my worldview. That guy is under the influence of Satan and Satan is gonna be much more impactful

in the world at large if he's working through academia. And so you end up developing this view that the principalities and the powers of Satan and his minions are not in the Ouija board that you can get off of the shelf in Walmart, they're in the classroom. You know, they're in the places that we're debating and defining culture.

They're changing with the times. Right, and according to the old Rhett, the way that I changed, and this is very much the outspoken view of many people who talk about me and you from the Christian world, is that we fell to the vices of Satan, that we are and were and still are under demonic influences.

And that's what's guiding us at this point. Oh, wow. Yeah, well, of course. That's the scariest story ever. Well, what else could it be? Just somebody learning that it's probably not true? That doesn't make any sense. It couldn't just be that.

There's also this like, okay, what of your own sinful nature and like your selfish inmost desires drive you? So it's like- Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. You know, and I also tend to own my faults as my own more than I would say I gave into the temptation of some external satanic force. Like, yeah, we could have done it all on our own

without the influence of Satan. It just depends on what your, you know, your take is, I guess. Summer is like a cocktail. It has to be mixed just right. Start with a handful of great friends. Now add your favorite music. And then finally, add Bacardi rum shake it together and there you have it the perfect summer mix Bacardi do what moves you live passionately drink responsibly copyright 2024 Bacardi it's trade dress and the bad device are trademarks of Bacardi and Company Limited rum 40 alcohol by volume let's go back to ghost hi my name's ellie and i have a somewhat spooky story per your twitter request my grandmother haunts my entire family it's just a fact it's not in any sort of scary way

she has a very distinct perfume smell um and anytime she wants to make her presence known, we all smell it. It's come up when we're all together for holidays or I don't know when something big happens. It came up most recently for me because I got a tattoo in her husband, my grandfather's handwriting. But yeah, it's more of a comforting haunting,

but nonetheless a haunting. I hope you all have a great day. Bye. Well, that ain't gonna happen now. After that story, I'm not having a great day with your grandma just spraying perfume. Perfume gives me a headache. You know, this is probably the scariest story

I've heard today. But you don't know if ghost perfume has the same sort of impact. Grandma ghost perfume is gonna make my brain hurt. I mean, Jenna, I don't know if you ever think about the awkward conversation we had about your perfume, but I think about it often. What do you remember about that conversation?

We were on tour in Toronto. Oh. Okay. It was a little overcast. I remember we were walking back from a lunch or a breakfast back to the hotel before you had your performances that night. And, yeah, we were walking along and it was- The three of us, maybe? The three of us. It was the three of us. and yeah, we were walking along and it was.

The three of us maybe? The three of us, it was the three of us and you were like, something about, I can't remember exactly how it started but you were just basically like, the perfume that you wear sometimes, it gives me a headache. And I was like, okay, it was Aqua de Gio,

Gio Gio was, or something, I can never pronounce it. How committed were you to this perfume? Was this your scent? I wasn't or something, I can never pronounce it. How committed were you to this perfume? Was this your scent? I wasn't fully committed, I mean it was the only thing. If you died and your family wanted to know you were pregnant, would this be the scent that you sprayed in the room?

It wasn't your signature scent. Yeah, I still have it, but I don't wear it around you anymore. But I've worn other perfumes and you haven't had that same reaction, so. Because you know that I would tell you if I did. Yes, if it did bother you, you just go ahead and tell me. But yeah, I do wear other perfume

and you haven't made a comment. If I, you know, if our interactions are, it goes both ways, you know? If they become defined by something that like really gives you a headache or a toothache or any type of ache, I would hope that you would tell me. Like that's the communication climate

that we have created by me just in the nicest way possible telling you don't wear perfume around me. Full stop. Full stop. I think that the level of- I didn't know you were wearing other perf perfume around me. Full stop. Full stop. I think that the level of- I didn't know you were wearing other perfumes around me. I feel kind of betrayed, but you're pushing your, you know what, it's your,

I thought I said no perfume, but I'm just joking now. You said that one. I said that one. You said that specific one. But that's not really what I was thinking. I was thinking- He only accepts like lotions from Bath and Body Works that smell like strawberries. But you're right, you haven't given me a headache

from the way that you've smelled since then. Just a headache from how I talk to you guys. No. But I think that the level of perfume that you wear during your life, because some people really go real, real hard with how much fragrance they put on. And maybe if you have a very high level

and there's a saturation in your skin, that can pass to the afterlife. And I believe I met someone who this would be the case with just this couple of days ago. I was going down to the bottom of my driveway, which is a hill, to bring the trash cans back up to the top of the driveway. And there was a young couple that was getting into a car coming out of someone's house,

and they got no closer than 50 feet. 50 feet outside, okay? And it was not windy. And I smelled this woman, or I smelled this woman's perfume. It was so intense. And as I ascended my driveway, I was setting the trash cans down at the top of my driveway and could still smell it.

Well, you gotta clear the nasal passages. You gotta blow out hard. The only point I'm making is that, well, A, I just feel like that's overdoing it. It's overdoing it. But B, when that woman becomes a ghost, she'll be a smelly ghost. Do you think that- Likedoing it. It's overdoing it. But B, if that, when that woman becomes a ghost, she'll be a smelly ghost. Do you think that- Like this grandma.

This grandma is just, she smells strong. You don't think she's like spraying it and trying to communicate. Oh, you think it's ghost perfume that she's like coming in it. Yeah, that's kind of how I was thinking. No, I think it somehow got through. It got through.

I mean, some form of you gets through. Some form of your physical form, right? The little girl was a little girl. The face didn't come. The face was left behind. She didn't get to bring her face. Sometimes things don't transfer. But I think that if you've saturated your epidermis

with this smell, I think that the people who- It can cross over. The people who make a decision about what's important to you, they're like looking at the list and they're like, smelling like this is important to this lady. Let it through. I think this is-

They let the perfume through. This is a cool one though, right? Cause it's like, it's a happy haunting. Like I'm still here in a, you know, I haven't completely left. Yeah. It doesn't sound like a rewarding experience for the grandma though, you know, it's like.

Well you don't know what it's like on the other side. Yeah, I really don't, Rhett. You don't know what it's like to attend Thanksgiving as a ghost, I mean it might be horrible. It might be know what it's like to attend Thanksgiving as a ghost. I mean, it might be horrible. It might be like, man, I wish I could eat that turkey leg. Or it might be like, I have no taste for turkey any longer. It's wonderful to see my former family gather.

All right, if this is where you're going, let's just go with one from the not as creepy category because I would like to break it up. Hey, Rat and Link. So my name is Jordan, and I think you guys might really like this one because I know that you guys are fans of The Office, and mine sort of revolves around that. So my spooky story is that when I was about 13 or so, I went with my family to Scranton, and we stayed at the Scranton Radisson,

and we just had a whole weekend where we visited all locations that they mentioned in the office. Really cool weekend, except at the Scranton Radisson, apparently there is a history there of it being haunted, and if you look up pictures, it definitely looks kind of like it's haunted. And so I then got a little scared

once we did, and I realized that this place was probably haunted, and I looked it up, and there were stories. And anyways, long story short, my mom is a medium, and I asked her, and she said, yeah, no, she definitely is picking up on some things. So all night, I was terrified. And when I woke up, I was like, okay, cool, we did it. You know, we got through the weekend, and there was no incident. And then, of course, right as I'm about to leave, I unplugged my charger from the wall. And I swear to you, my fingers were not touching anything else. It was not touching the wall. Nothing was sticking out. When I unplugged it, my finger got cut and really bad and was bleeding. And it just nonstopstop blood the whole way back.

And I swear to you, there's nothing around, nothing poking out. So yeah, that was my story. Thanks guys, appreciate it. So a Radisson ghost. Did the dude cut his finger? His mom's a medium though. I don't know what to make of this one.

It still, it almost seemed as creepy as the other one. I'm about to say, it is. I thought it was in the not as creepy category, but like until the like the cut part, like it did kind of fizzle out, you know. But that's a good idea for like a family trip. You know, if everybody watches The Office, I prefer watching Survivor and then going to Fiji, but if you prefer watching The Office and going to Scranton,

then that can be your bowl of chips. You know what I'm saying? But they didn't film in Scranton. I don't know. Did they film exteriors in Scranton? Is that what they did? I hope that they did. They filmed in LA.

They filmed most in LA, but I guess they had exteriors there. You having fun? You liking this? Oh, I'm loving it. Hi. You guys were looking for spooky stories? Yes. Scariest thing that ever happened to me was I was babysitting or looking after my parents' house a few years back.

And it was kind of getting towards the later in the evening on one day while I was there. And I just was kind of finishing up my errands for the day. So I decided I was going to take out the trash. Garbage man was coming the next morning, so it felt like it was the right thing to do. So I took the garbage out. And I remember very specifically on the way out looking at the digital clock that's next to

the computer in the living room as I was heading out and it said it was 6.07 p.m. and this is kind of in the summer so it was light outside still even though I was in the evening. So took the garbage down to the end of the driveway, dropped it off, walked back to the house, and the activity that should have taken no more than a minute or two. And then all of a sudden, when I closed the door, it's like I blinked, and it was pitch black outside. And I went and looked at the clock, and it said it was 12.07am, as in just after midnight um i like tore around the house checked all the clocks all of them said the exact same thing and i still to this day have no idea what happened during those six hours um ended up calling a friend of mine woke him up and i went and slept at his house for that night because i was just too freaked out. So yeah, that was my terrifying story.

What? That's wild. I mean, home alone, like taking the trash, like nobody's at the house. It's light and then it's dark. I don't know if I would call a friend after this. I think I would go to WebMD. I know, yeah.

You start to think like I had a time lapse, like did I, I mean, but she didn't, it's not like she like found herself crumpled up on the floor, like coming to from fainting or something. It was- Well, yeah, I know, but I'd be freaked out, of course. I would Google it from a friend's house after I left the vicinity, yeah.

Yeah, I would think like, what happened to me? Like what happened in my brain? That's a scary on a medical level versus on a horror level kind of a thing to me. But if you lost six hours, did everybody? But this is the type of horror movie that I would like to watch. Yeah.

It's more psychological thriller. Like what happened to you in those six hours? Aliens, potentially. Because that is a common thing in stories of alien abduction is completely missed time. I think vampires can also wipe your memory. Yeah, they suck your memory out with your blood. I don't know what, it could be the strange perfume

of a grandmother or a neighbor. Well, I don't know. And what we do in the shadows, they can easily. Yeah, that's what I was referring to. That's where I learned all my vampire knowledge from, but like, that's a good story. I mean, it's one of those things that like, when it happens to you, yeah, hopefully, I mean,

she's had no other symptoms since then, obviously. It reminds me of the book, The Midnight Library. I have read it. Yeah, where you can jump into another version of yourself to see if that's the life you want to live. So it's like a multiversal. So maybe somebody assumed her life for six hours. A version of her assumed her life for six hours.

And then you suddenly got back. And then decided they didn't want it. Yeah. So she just concluded like, oh, my life's not good enough to be taken over by another version of myself? Yeah. Okay.

It's a fascinating, fascinating book. It's a really good book, yeah. Hmm. It's an adult book, huh? Is it a children's book? You're talking about reading this recently or? It's an adult book. Is it, yeah.

Okay. But young adults could read it, easy. Yeah, that's freaky. What about this one? Hey, Rhett and Link. Okay, so here is my disturbing slash spooky experience. So some friends and I were driving home from a concert, and we lived in Michigan,

and we were driving home from Chicago to Michigan. And it was pretty late, and one of our friends was asleep in the backseat, and then the three other of us were awake. Well, obviously. And so we were just driving along, and we were all really tired. And so when we were driving, I saw what looked to be about a six and a half to seven foot tall man slash dog walking alongside the highway. And I thought I was hallucinating it. And I said, Oh, my God, I'm hallucinating. And he goes, my friend who was

driving goes, No, I saw that too. And our friend in the backseat, the friend who was driving goes no i saw that too and our friend in the back seat the one who was awake goes i saw it too it was a dog man and we were all like holy shit and uh oh can i swear on here sorry and uh our friend who was sleeping woke up and was like what what did we see and i was like you didn't see anything but yeah we've all been really freaked out about it since then. We've looked it up and apparently there's something called the Dog Man of Michigan. It's like, I never knew about it before

until we looked it up, but it's a thing. People see them. Kinda crazy. Well, when you experience something. Oh, she said bye guys. That scared me. Like the fact that, it's the Dog Man. Bye guys. Like I literally, I, she said bye guys. That scared me. Like the fact that- It's the dog man.

Bye guys. I thought it was hi guys. I literally got scared. Hi guys, it's the dog man. I thought I was playing another voicemail. I'm hearing your computer. I mean, when you get in this zone of like being exposed to this type of stuff,

I'm going to go home tonight. I'm gonna put the trash cans back around in the dark and I'm gonna do what I do when I start thinking about these types of things and I'm gonna have to run back in the house. Like I'm on record saying I've had to do it. I'm gonna do it again after this. You ever take a bat or anything out there?

I don't. Like a weapon? I want a bat. You think anyone allows me to have weapons in my own house? No, there's nothing that you, like a fire, I don't even have fire poker. Like I have one of those things where you can make s'mores. I have a bat under my bed. I have a bat that is made for like hitting intruders with

that it's made out of like a composite and it's really heavy and I think it has a piece of metal inside of it. I think the one I got is too big. Like I feel like I- You can't wield it. It's a little too heavy, but if I could catch you with it, it's over, man.

But it's, cause it's not like a wooden bat, cause if you hit somebody with a wooden bat, it'll break. Can you throw it? Cause that needs to be good. You could. It needs to have throwing stars in the bottom of it. But the thing about this is, again, there's two other people in the car, and the first, you know, she's like, I'm hallucinating.

I love this story. This is my favorite. Then everybody's like, no, I saw something too. I saw a dog man. It's like, I saw a dog man. And then it turns out, so there's corroboration within the vehicle of, I didn't tell you it was a dog man.

I just said I hallucinated. You said it was a dog man and I agree. And then you start looking it up and there is a dog man of Michigan who they didn't know about beforehand. Okay. Like this is really coming together. I said that we weren't gonna do this,

but I have to do it on this one because for me, this is the easiest one for me. This one's not scary to me because- Oh really? Yeah, because there's somebody dressing up like a dog man in Michigan. Like that's, and I would do this. And I may do this in my older years.

Assume a creepy identity of some sort of creature and be seen in a state. You're large, dude. You are freaking large. Well, think about it. If you take an average-sized dude, six feet tall, and he puts some sort of- Headpiece. Headpiece on,

that's a dog, and he puts on some like tattered clothing. He's like, yeah, I walked down the side of the street here. And then I have a little place where I can go back into the woods that people stop. And you know, it's fun. It's fun. There is a risk to that guy's getting shot or something. For real.

I mean, I wouldn't do that. That's really high risk in that way. I think it would be cool to do it. It'd be cool to know that you did it. Oh, to be friends with the Dog Man? It'd be cool to be friends with you, Dog Man. So that like, I mean, to do it for like on and off for a month and then start to search online

to see when people start to talk about it, that would be fun. But what- That's a long play prank. But we gotta come up with my persona because it can't be Dog Man because that's taken. I don't think you should do this because I don't want you to get shot. Because my other part of this is if you were there

and it happened the way it happened, would you stop and turn around? Not knowing that it was a Dog Man of Michigan until later. Hell yeah, stop and turn around. I don't know if you would. I think you would be too scared. What? I think you'd be on the fence.

Now, if you were going there to see the Dog Man of Michigan, like you were Ryan and Shane doing an episode of Ghost Files, of course, this is exactly what you wanted. You would turn around and you'd be going all through the woods filming stuff. And I, yes, I would be there. I think I'm gonna walk. For that. I'm gonna walk the PCH.

But if you didn't know. So I'm right next to the beach. I don't know that you would stop. And I'm Barnacle Man. And it's just a man, it looks like a dead dude covered in barnacles. Barney the Barnacle Man. That could, I mean, I'm not gonna give you a name.

Barney Cull. And I kind of like scrape along across the bridges and stuff. Barnacle Man of the PCH. I mean, if you got shot, then I don't think they would be. You're less likely to get shot in California for being Barnacle Man than you are in Michigan. Well, that's true.

You know what I'm saying? I'm definitely not doing it in the South. You're like deer man, lasted a week. This one is a California one, if you're talking about California. Hey Rhett and Link, My name is Janelle. I'm a longtime listener, first-time caller. Hey.

And I grew up in Camarillo, California. You may have driven through on your way to Santa Barbara or Ventura. Mm-hmm. And we have California State Channel Islands located in Camarillo, which used to be Camarillo State Hospital. And it's pretty done up these days. It doesn't look quite as run down, but it's still pretty creepy. And growing up, we used to go out there around Halloween time and

try and scare ourselves. And there's like an old dairy because the hospital was self-sufficient. And that part is still super run down and creepy. There's a lot of urban legends about the place. a lot of urban legends about the place. And, yeah. And I actually went to college there as it was CSUCI. And that was really creepy. After late classes, you'd kind of see stuff you're not supposed to see, and it's, you know, bars on the windows and everything.

And fun fact, my great-grandpa died there. So that makes it less scary for me because it's just old Gramps hanging out. All right, see ya. Is it on one of the islands? Is that what she said? No, it's on the mainland and Hotel California, the song is about this mental institution? Huh, I've heard so many things about Hotel California this mental institution? Huh. I've heard so many things about Hotel California that it's like, there's probably,

I think there's five other theories, but I don't know if this is like an Eagles, Brian, I'm asking you if this is like a Eagles have gone on record saying that. Cause it's like, they don't know. There's a place in Mexico. Really? I've heard this a lot. Like growing up, I used to hear about this all the time.

Like everybody that would go to Cal State, Channel Islands would always come back and- Said they went to Hotel California. Yeah. That's cool. So yeah, it's the narrative that I grew up with. Yeah, the mental institution, which I don't know if they even call them that anymore,

is like, that's a, I mean, if I grew up there, I could definitely see that in high school, we would have done that, gone out there and like egged each other on. I'm really surprised that we didn't, like, as much as you're into this stuff now, you weren't quite, and you like to scare all of our friends. Like we were into camping in the woods and stuff like that,

but we never got into this spooky thing in the way that like nowadays, it's such a trend. We didn't have the internet. We didn't have the internet, you're right. And we did, you know, it's- You had to know somebody who knew it. We would, if we were in high school now, we would have organized these kinds of trips.

Every state's got them, but there are multiple legends in North Carolina about lights and ghosts and stuff. I know, and we just kinda missed all of that. I feel sad for us, but I'm kinda glad at the same time. All right. This one looks interesting. Hey, what's up, guys? I'm calling for the spooky experience.

So I was in fifth or sixth grade, and my dad took me to the Amazon for a canoe trip. And we had been down there for a couple days. We're canoeing. We're feeling the vibe. And one day we're canoeing. It's the middle of the day, bright sunny day. And I'm canoeing along and we pass this riverbank. And what I see really freaked me out.

It was a clown. And I know clowns are this like crazy thing now and people are scared of clowns. But it just was a clown. Wasn't doing anything spooky. It was just standing there. That's spooky. I didn't know how to react.

So I look to my dad, and I'm about to tell him, but I see his face. And his face was, I've never seen my dad scared before. And that's all I can describe it as. And I say to him, I'm like, what's wrong? What's wrong? And he goes, oh, I can't tell you. I can't tell you. And I go, tell me.

Please just tell me. And he looks at me and goes, I think I saw a clown. We never talk about it. We never asked anyone about it. We just kept going down the river. And so from that day on, me and my dad have this strange clown in the Amazon story. Then that's it.

Have a good one. That's enough. Happy Halloween. That is, I mean, that's freaky. Again, you could make the dog man in Michigan explanation here. Somebody in Amazon. It would be helpful to know like where on the Amazon they were.

Were they like in a dense area where there was no towns or whatever? I mean, people, even though clowns are creepy, people still choose to be them. Right. You know, there are people who are just like clowns and I guess clowns gotta go to the river sometimes. And just stand.

Well wouldn't you though, again. I feel like his arms were like totally limp at his sides and he was motionless. Well there was a clown going around. But then his head did turn, you know? It was like, that's the only thing that moved was like his head turned. Yeah well that would be crazy.

And then his smile got bigger. Like that's the only thing that moved was like his head turned. Yeah, well that would be crazy. And then his smile got bigger. Like that's the only thing that moved. There was a clown that was going around somewhere in the United States. It's like his hands are really heavy. Not recently, but in the last few years, there was a repeated clown sighting, maybe in LA. I don't know, but this is, again,

I think about the people who are like me, and again, I don't do this because I don't have enough free time, and I really don't wanna put on the makeup and the costume, but I totally get the idea of I'm just going to do this thing that's gonna freak people out and give people stories and stuff. That's exactly what that was.

I think it was multiple people dressing up like clowns and just being places. And it really started freaking out and people and like they started to, it was like a, there was a rash of clown sightings. And it was, you know, it started raising other questions about like, okay, what are they after? And, you know, and it could be an innocent prank,

but it could also be something. Yeah, that's why you don't want to dress up like somebody, man. I mean, I wonder if any of those clowns got attacked. I don't think anybody would attack Barnacle Boy. All right, fine. Just leave me out of it. Let's wrap it up with this one. Hey, guys.

Brad here. Long time fan. I love what you guys do. Thank you. This is in response to the spooky story tweet that you guys put out there. So this one's a bit of a doozy. I have sleep paralysis occasionally. And a few years ago, I went to bed, but this time I felt different.

I sunk through my bed, through the floor, and landed in my kitchen, is what it felt like. And I felt this tingling sensation behind me, and when I turned around, there was a giant black mass with a letter on the table behind it. So I approached the letter, and I open it, and it's empty. There's nothing on it. But like Tom Riddle's diary in Harry Potter, the letter is being written in real time in front of me. And for the sake of the story, I'm going to use the name Rebecca, but the letter said, thank you for taking care of Rebecca. I really appreciated all the people in Rebecca's life who did it pretty poorly, but you're

the only person that actually takes care of her, so thank you. Love, Rebecca's grandmother. And then in that moment, when I finished, I got floated up through the floor again, landed in my bed, and shot up and gasped for air. It was just so crazy. So the next day, I contacted Rebecca, and I said, this might sound weird,

but I think I was visited by your grandmother in my sleep. And Rebecca responds with, that's not weird at all. My grandmother visits me in my sleep all the time. And then I said, she left me a thank you letter. What do you think that has to do with anything? And Rebecca said that her grandmother left letters for anybody, and it didn't matter if they invited her over for dinner,

they would get a thank you letter. And when she sent me a photo of an existing letter, it was the same handwriting as in my dream. And I'm not joking. It was insane. Anyway, I hope that's a good dream. And I am not joking, it was insane. Anyway, I hope that's a good one. And happy Halloween, everybody. Oh God!

Oh my God! Hey, that was, Ryan said leave that one for last. But it was a good one again. I think that the moral here is that ghosts can be good. If they're grandmas. Yeah, especially grandma ghosts. Man, that's crazy. You've had sleep paralysis.

That's scary in and of itself, right? But I've never seen, lots of people see the black figure, like the black mass. And there's a name for it, like the sleep paralysis demon or something like that. I haven't had it in many years, but I used to have it all the time as a kid and a teenager and then into my 20s,

but it's probably happened once or twice in the past 15 years. But it's never been scary on a supernatural level or I've seen anything. It just makes me very scared for my safety. I'm not gonna be stuck like this. You're not thinking straight in the moment because you're like half awake. But I've definitely never been transported to a kitchen

and read somebody's grandma's note. I wish I had. To get a thank you letter from a ghost written in real time. That's pretty cool, man. It's pretty cool. Talk about feeling validated for something you did. Yeah.

That's better than a trophy or a medal or like a ribbon that you wear around your neck. Ghost letters. I mean, Christy's- That's a whole series of books. Christy's parents told her that like, don't do anything you shouldn't do with your boyfriend because your dead grandma's watching.

Like that's literally what they told her. And it worked. Yeah, like Christy said, it worked. And it was like, this is kind of corroboration. You know, it's like, what has grandma seen? You know, with a letter she could write about me. You know, I'm just grateful that my n you know, my nanny didn't pass away until I was, you know, an adult. I thought about this many times as a teenager.

First of all, I'm grateful that my nanny didn't pass away until when she did because I love my nanny. But I guess as like a correlation, I'd also not want any nannies watching me in the stuff that I was- But this is the thing, grandmas know that people masturbate. Grandmas know.

And so- Well, I mean, I wasn't just thinking about- I thought about this as a masturbating teen who had a dead grandmother. And I was like, if my ancestors, including my grandma, Granny was her name, can see me doing this, just like, well, she can also look away, you know? Cause she can choose to see anyone masturbating

and everywhere she's gonna look, she's gonna see somebody masturbating. Yeah, but when all of your ancestors are gathered around watching you masturbate, if granny looks away, she's gonna feel like the peer pressure of like, don't look away, granny. Again, going back to the ghost orientation, I think like page two is like,

let's talk about masturbation. You're gonna see a lot of it. And you didn't see a whole lot of it in your waking life, but this is pretty much- This is gonna define your afterlife. It's like, you're't see a whole lot of it in your waking life, but this is pretty much- This is gonna define your afterlife. It's like, you're gonna see so much whacking off that you're gonna become completely desensitized to it, and you're going to see your grandkids whacking off, okay? It's just part of the deal. And then people- any questions?

It's like, do I have to look? It's like, you don't have to look, but you might as well start looking because everyone does it, guys. I mean, I thought about this as a kid and I got over it very quickly. It's a good idea for a show. I mean, it's like, basically what you just pitched was like the ghost version of what we do in the shadows.

Like the way they approach the world of vampires. It's like, how does this practically play out from the ghost perspective? All right, let's make that TV show. I'm sure it's been done, but like I would love to see them do it. Let's go around town and pitch that TV show and be told why no one will let us make it.

Let's do that, that's fun. No, we don't do that. But I do think, the more I think about it, I think there was a New Zealand based show that was a companion show to- What We Do in the Shadows. What We Do in the Shadows, that's more of like a paranormal.

I thought they were doing a werewolf spinoff. I think they're doing that too. So anyway, I'm pretty sure it already exists. Cause I've watched one episode, it was just really hard to understand them. And I didn't know how to turn subtitles on yet. Can't remember what it's called, but. Okay.

You have a rec for us? Yeah, I got a rec for us. Especially if you wanna like cleanse your brain of like all this scary stuff so that when you take out your trash, you don't have to sprint back in. Like there's a happy place that I now find myself going to a lot on TikTok.

So this is a TikTok recommendation. Jewel, the artist known as Jewel, the Canadian blonde woman, you know, who sang the songs in the 90s. She loves TikTok. And she's got a great sense of humor. She tells some great stories. She will go on hikes and she will show you amazing vistas. And she has catchphrases.

I think her main catchphrase is something to the effect of, would you get a load of the bullshit that I got going on today? Like this is what she says. She's like, and you know, her teeth are perfectly imperfect. Like she's decided that that's not something she's ever gonna change about herself. And I love her for it.

Like I'm saying, I mean, she's a beautiful person inside and out. And it's just like, she's a beautiful person inside and out. And it's just like- That's smart. She'll make you happy. And I would love to be her friend. Like I'm not saying I have a crush on her. It sounds like you are, which is fine.

I think I do have a crush on her, but I also would, I really just want to be her friend. Like I really want to go on a hike with her. And sometimes if she's on tour, like she doesn't seem like she has any friends because you never see anybody in her videos except for her. But she, you know, she takes ice baths. She tells stories of like growing up

and wherever the hell she's actually from. Alaska, right? I guess it's, yeah, it's Alaska, but yeah, but I think she was talking about her uncle who's from Iceland. She tells funny stories about her relatives like that. There it is, man. Follow Jewel on TikTok.

You're welcome. Thank you for all your stories, your call-in. It's very fun, very fun. I'm not gonna sleep well well tonight thanks to you. Hashtag Ear Biscuits. Let us know what you think. 1-88-EAR-POD-1. Okay, here's my spooky story.

I know a lady, and she had a vacuum cleaner I was trying to borrow, a shop vac. vacuum cleaner, I was trying to borrow a shop vac. And we were looking in the shop, in her shed for the shop vac. And her husband had recently died. We could not find the hose for the vacuum. And a voice from nowhere whispered in my ear, look inside. And I and I said hey I think Jim is telling us to look inside and sure enough she looked inside the vacuum and there was the hose that's my story hey my name is Justin I was not a big believer in the supernatural until one night while I was in bed with my ex-wife who I now believed to be personally legitimately haunted. I woke up to a scream from her and I saw a guy like half sort of bent over our bed and he was there and

then gone all of a sudden. We compared notes later on and we either had the craziest shared dream or something was there with us. And this is just one of like a few instances that led me to believing in the things that I do now. Thanks for listening. We love you. Hey guys, this is Jamie. I'm actually on a paranormal team and I've had a couple. But my favorite was I was sitting at a local haunted attraction when I heard a whisper that said, We're coming Jamie which is my name and then everything on my rearview mirror started to blow as if

the wind was blowing on it but there was no breeze there was no one around then we got home and the lights turned on in our apartment so we had to do a cleansing because it was pretty terrifying