Ear Biscuits with Rhett & Link - Your Burning Sex-Related Questions and Hilarious Stories | Ear Biscuits Ep. 350

Episode Date: September 19, 2022

Warning: Listener discretion is advised. What a Sextember it has been! For our final installment this year, Rhett and Link are letting you in on the fun. They asked and you submitted all your burning sex-related questions and hilarious sex-related stories! Been caught having sex by your parents? Lost your virginity in a threesome? Or maybe you just want to know how to introduce toys in the bedroom? All this and more on our final episode of Sextember 2022! Want to hear your voice on Ear Biscuits? Call 1-888-EAR-POD1 and we might just play your call on an upcoming episode! To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This, this, this, this is mythical. Shop Best Buy's ultimate smartphone sale today. Get a Best Buy gift card of up to $200 on select phone activations with major carriers. Visit your nearest Best Buy store today. Terms and conditions apply. Welcome to Ear Biscuits, the podcast, where two lifelong friends talk about sex for a long time. I'm Link. And I'm Sex, I mean Rhett.

This week at the round table of dim lighting, we are continuing on with Sex-Tember! It's actually the last episode in Sex-Tember, and instead of getting professionals to give us solid evidence-based information, now we're turning back to us, just the two guys who make this podcast.

We're also turning to you, though. We asked you if you had a burning sex-related question. I don't think that was a gonorrhea reference. Right, but, well, it could be. Or a hilarious sex-related story. We said we wanted to discuss it on Ear Biscuits. Discuss it. Discuss it. We said you could call us at 1-88-EAR-POD-1.

You could email us. We made an address. It could be anonymous. We're not gonna mention any names today. And Jenna, if you're willing, we want you to read the anonymous emails so that we could have the sense of it being a voicemail, even though it's just, we all know it's just you.

Happy to read them for everyone. Yeah. She's happy to read them. Are you gonna do voices or are you going to do Jenna voice? Jenna voice. Okay. Well, you can change your mind. I can change my mind. You can change your mind. It's up to you. We'll see when. We'll see. It's up to you.

We'll see when we get to it. It's up to you. Do we need any preambles? Of course, just the warning of this is more specific and potentially explicit sexy, sexy, sex conversation. So if this isn't for you or any other ears who may be in earshot, skip it or put some earbuds in.

I would say that I have seen and appreciated a lot of the support that we've gotten for going back into sex timber again and talking about these things candidly. I got very little, if any, butt plug shaming thus far. Just a couple of jokes here and there maybe. Oh yeah, no shaming. So yeah, we've got a great herd of mythical beasts

that they're happy that we're talking about sex again. I do think that they're happy that we brought in some qualified professionals. So today is our happy ending. Exactly. Of this series. I'll tell you what I haven't received. Any butt plugs.

Well, you know what? Like Emily was supposed to send us. Well, shipping, I mean, she's gonna send them? I mean, it hasn't been that long, you know? Do I need to resort to my own ordering devices? Well, first of all, yes, you can do your own sex toy ordering. That is completely up to you.

But I'm saying I don't wanna be just inundated with butt plugs if I'm gonna get them from two different angles. Well, you can. You kind of only want one angle at a time. If you get too many butt plugs, you can give them out for like Christmas gifts. I never knew.

I'm sure your extended family would appreciate that. That the butt plug thing would be such a cornerstone part of this sex-temper. Well, they make quite a stocking stuffer. Is that what you call it? Your stocking? What is that? A turnip?

A Mario, a Super Mario. A Mario shaped turnip. Turnip, yeah, yeah. All right, let's play one first. I mean, maybe they didn't say their name. I guess we can bleep it. But we're not going to disguise voices. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, let's play the first voicemail.

Hey, Rhett and Link. This is in regards to your rated R question that you posted on Twitter just today, on whatever today was. Yeah. My question to you is if you could suck your own joint, would you? Nope.

I was asked this question at my old job, and they were very non-discriminating about who they asked it to. Pretty open about it, so I was wondering if you guys would be that way too. Have a great one. So it was an interview question? They asked this particular place of work?

Indiscriminately asked this question at his former place of employment. Would you suck your own joint? I'm just imagining it's a subway. I don't know why. I just was imagining that question being asked openly by sandwich artists. While there's a line of people waiting I just was imagining that question being asked openly by sandwich artists.

While there's a line of people waiting to order the extra mayo, low fat mayo. Don't do the low fat mayo. Second of all, the term joint for a penis. Had heard it, but I don't dislike it. Yeah. I knew immediately what he was talking about. Yeah, cause it was suck your own,

was the first, was the preamble to joint. I don't know, but I mean, you could suck any joint. Like people try to lick their own elbow. Yeah, some people can successfully. Well, I don't know how to answer this other than I've tried. I mean, yeah, I've tried too. I mean, who hasn't tried?

The people who haven't. I mean, it kind of, you know, once you discover masturbation, it's pretty much like, doesn't that seem like the next level? Yeah, it's like, I can, it's like this hand is really well equipped to do a lot of great things.

It just dangles right down there next to it. What can this thing do? I'm pointing at my mouth. Not a lot if you can't reach it. I'm not as flexible as I used to be, but I'll just go on record and say that I believe probably around age, I was at my sexual peak and sexual limberness at probably like 16, you know?

And I do remember, it's funny how I feel like I always end up saying something really self-disclosing and potentially embarrassing really early in these episodes. Yeah, and then because you do, I don't feel the need to say anything. Okay, well. Because I don't want it to seem like

I'm trying to outdo you or compare myself to you because I think it's important that your sexual experience is your own. It's not about comparing. So I think sometimes- Well, when somebody asks you if you sucked your own joint, you gotta answer. I said that I've tried.

And now you're about to say something else, but I just wanna say, maybe you're a little disappointed that I haven't had as much disclosure this month. No, no, no, no, no. As you have. No, I wasn't saying it as opposed to you. I was just saying, it's just funny how it just ends up happening in these first questions.

I did make, how can I say? I did at one point make tongue to tip contact. But it hurt really bad, like your back. But I was so uncomfortable that, and I mean, there was nothing else could happen. It was just like, they touched in a moment of discovery and beauty. I'm sure it was not beautiful to look at.

It's kinda like those angel babies in the Sistine Chapel, like their fingertips reaching out to each other. No, that's God, man. That's the hand of God, and I don't know in this scenario if the tongue or the dick is God. I thought it was angel babies. I think it's, no it's- Aren't angel babies reaching out too?

Well yeah, but one of the hands is God. Oh, and the other one's a baby? I don't know what the other hand is. Yeah. But one of them's God's hand. Yeah, and one of these in this, yeah, analogously is our tongue and our collective penis. Suck your own God's hand.

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get sacrilegious. Yeah, don't do that. I wasn't talking about your God. I was just talking about an artistic representation I was talking about somebody else's God. Of the tension of almost touching. So anyway, telling to tip contact is the best I ever did.

Yeah, because you're bent over so far, especially with your back. I was thinking that maybe you had more success. I remember my back was bent over so far. You're so flexible. That like it was hurting so bad that like it started, you know, it created a retreat scenario for my member. My joint, as you might call it.

I was on my back. Oh, you were doing like a backwards roll? I was on my back and I was folding myself over. Well, listen, around, I guess this was high school when that Tool album came out and when you opened it up, there was a picture and I swear, I don't know, I hope this isn't just something that I created in my head, that you could move it and it had that like,

it was two images with the viewing angle thing and like so it would have an animation. And it was a guy pleasuring himself with his, yeah, he was doing just this. And he was shirtless. And his back was to the camera and he was like, I just thought he was like waddling back and forth. And then I realized that no, no, no,

this guy's achieved something that requires circus level flexibility. I just gotta say- Can I try this? And then it hurt too bad. Right, if it was easy, like if my penis was my thumb, I probably wouldn't have a job. You know what I'm saying? I'd be like a baby.

I'd be like a baby. I mean, I'm just gonna tell you right now, if I could, I would, and if it was easy, I would be doing it all the time. If it was easy. So I'm glad that it's hard. If it was easy, everybody would be doing it. Right.

It doesn't apply to this, any lesson, any other scenario where you could use that. Speaking of God, there's a reason that she didn't put the penis on the thumb. Because she knew that we would all be, you know, sucking our thumbs all the time. I mean, I actually think that's what determines the length of your penis, you know?

So it can, you know, if you think that like, longer is better and maybe you're self-conscious about like the length of it, then you just say, you know what? It's a formula. If it was too long, you'd be in trouble. Right, if it was too long, you wouldn't have a job. If it was too long, you wouldn't have a job.

Right. Yeah, is there anything else to say about this? I think we've said quite a bit. Let's get a story here. I'm going to click on this voicemail. Hey, I wanted to tell you about a sex-related story, and I really don't care if you keep it anonymous or not, because everybody knows this at this point everybody I know anyway so when I was younger and I was dating my boyfriend I skipped

school and went over to his house and being the teenagers that we were we ended up uh in the bedroom well his mom was not supposed to come home from work until like 5 p.m., but when we were in the middle of, yeah, I hear high heels clicking on the wooden floor outside of his door. His mom slammed open his door and started lecturing us, going off on us. Both of us are buck-ass naked in bed, freaking out. I'm crying. I had brought my iPod over to my boyfriend's house. It was set on shuffle. While his mother was lecturing us about our horrible choices,

the song Pour Some Sugar On Me by Def Leppard started playing on the iPod, and it was across the room. We could not turn it off, so she lectured us to the soundtrack i'll pour some sugar on me my husband and i cut our wedding cake to that song we're still together all these years later so that's my funny story and i'll never live it down i still have friends to this day call me when that song's on the radio just so i I can hear it. What? Yeah. You guys have a good day. Bye. Oh, we are now, Morgan. Morgan, Morgan, Morgan.

Listen, did Morgan say that they got married? Yes. Like, so there you go. Mom, you were wrong. Slip inside, walk this way, have sex in front of your mom. Hey, hey! Well, the one thing that she didn't talk about was

what happened when they were caught. Because I've never been caught having sex by anybody. And I don't really know what the plan is here. But I think that if you're, okay, let's just go, I'm gonna give you a scenario on what I think you should do. If you're having sex with someone at their house, like they're like, you know, and they live with their parents,

and their parents catch you having sex with their child, their daughter or son, whatever, I mean. Yes, I'm tracking. Then you have to stop having sex, first of all. Let's just say you do not finish. Once you're caught, you do not finish. I think that's one rule.

But then I think you don't run out. I think you stand up and introduce yourself. I think you extend your hand. If you made your bed lie in it, but you made your decision stand up and introduce yourself. I think you extend your hand. If you made your bed lie in it, but you made your decision stand up and shake. Sir, it's nice to meet you. You know, you go and give a nice firm handshake. Don't jump out the window, don't go into the closet,

because you are still making your first impression in that moment. And it's like, well, you know what? He snuck in here, he had sex with her daughter, but he gave me a nice firm handshake. You know, and like- I wouldn't touch. I wouldn't touch any parent.

Fist bump. Like what about just like a nice assertive wave? Like point and snap. Hey, just a little wave? I'm not, don't touch. I don't want to be touched. Yeah, that's true. I didn't think about that.

Yeah, no physical contact with the parental figure. I think a fist bump is okay. Unless you've been fisting. I mean, I would- At that point, hush yourself. Then it could be a real problem. Hush. Listen, I'd be in that closet before

with two clicks of the- You go in the closet, they, it's, you can't, it's like an ostrich putting its head in the sand. You're still in the closet. You just can't go in the closet. Yeah, it just makes it awkward. I think you gotta just take it and be like- I mean, at least you could then grab something

out of the closet, put it on and come out and- I do think putting on, maybe putting some sort of like, in fact, if you got a sheet, quickly apply it like a toga and then you just look like a history buff. Oh, we were, you know, we were actually doing our Greek home run. Yeah, that's right. This is role play.

Yeah, it is. We were in the bath, the Roman bath. There's no penetration. What do you mean? There's no penetration in a Roman bath? No, no penetration. What do you mean? There's no penetration in a Roman bath? No, no, I'm saying, I'm going along with it. I'm saying you gotta say, you gotta tell the parents, there's no penetration.

I mean, as I've established, I've been seen through a window by hikers, but I've never been caught by someone I knew. I've almost been caught by a child who just came in. You gotta make sure that door's locked. Well, put yourself in the shoes of a parent and let's say you come home and you find one of your children

having lovey time with a significant other. What are you gonna do in that moment? What would you do? I would not, well, I'd try not to burst into doors and catch kids doing anything. True, but let's just say accidentally, you knocked, they didn't hear you. I would immediately leave. Right. And then I would say, let's discuss this accidentally, you knocked, they didn't hear you. I would immediately leave.

And then I would say, let's discuss this later. Discuss this later. That's the funny part of the story is that you gotta like, obviously they're probably not gonna finish after they've been caught. Mission accomplished, you stop them from having sex, whatever, you close the door, and then you just go and sit in the living room and just wait.

I would take a jog probably. Well, I would like. Yeah, but you don't lecture them in the moment. I do have a punching bag in my garage that Christy got years ago. When was the last time you punched that thing? I've never punched it, but I think this would be the perfect occasion.

Yeah. So that's where I'll be. I'll be out there just punching the daylights out of that thing. And just trying to figure out how I'm gonna keep my cool afterward. But also- It's a natural process, what was happening.

You hope that it's happening in a way that is responsible. And I think that's the way you wanna have the conversation. It's cause it sounds like in this scenario, maybe Morgan's parents didn't know that she was having sex yet or whatever, you know. But if you're like, oh, my kids are sexually active in a relationship or whatever, and you know that they're having sex and catching them having sex is kind of a,

is different than this being your, you know, realization that your kids are having sex. Right. It's so difficult to decide to start talking openly about sex, especially with like your first child, you know, if you have multiple children, because it, unless you're in like a really open household

where you just discuss all these things and like you make sex references all the time, even before your kid can understand what they're talking about. So they never can remember a moment when you weren't making some sort of sexual reference. Just kind of like, oh, I remember watching this sitcom for years

and then I got to an age where I realized that they've been making sexual references the whole time. That's kind of a nice way to just kind of make it part of the communication climate in the home. But practically speaking, for a lot of people, including me, that never happened. So it's like with the, with now that my kids are, I have older kids and younger kids,

there was this different dynamic of, you know, you're referencing things and we're making a decision to kind of like the fact that sex exists and it is, and they have an opportunity to do it, it's like, we might as well, it's counterproductive to like never speak of it. And then the younger siblings, they just kind of get,

they kind of absorb it in a way that inoculates you in a good way to it being something we can never talk about, it's a taboo. But with that first child, at least, I'm oversimplifying here, you have to make this decision and it's hard to not do it too late. I think it's a little bit, a little bit goes a long way and it's better to start a little early than too late.

It helps when your kids are begging you to tell them, which is what happened with- Yeah, which we talked about last time. But yeah, Morgan, sounds like it all worked out for you. Yeah, congrats on the marriage. Summer's here and you can now get almost anything you need for your sunny days delivered with Uber Eats.

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Get almost, almost anything delivered with Uber Eats. Order now. Alcohol and select markets. Product availability may vary by Regency app for details. Jenna, let's get to an anonymous email. Would you like a question or story first?

Let's go question. Okay. Doesn't like sex. How can I spice it up? Hello. Long time fan first-time emailer. Okay, I have a sex-related question that might be TMI. I've been with my husband for seven whole years, and while I hate to admit it, our sex life is boring, sad, predictable. I even once told him to please don't love me in the bedroom. Do you guys have suggestions how to spice it up or just how to initiate that uncomfortable conversation? P.S. We're both huge fans.

All the best. I asked my husband to love me everywhere but the bedroom. Please don't love me in the bedroom. First, stop saying that. Step one. I guess what they're getting at is, you know, foreplay starts out of the bedroom. That's not what I heard.

What did you hear? I wanna, they wanna have sex somewhere else? Like not in the bedroom? No, I heard that they are not having a very active sex life. Well, I heard that they are not having a very active sex life. Well, I heard that too. For whatever reason. But the thing is-

Seven years. Is that it sounds like there is a desire to have a more active sex life, and maybe they're both on team, let's have more sex, and let's have a more satisfying sex life. I think one of the things that we learned in talking to the Dr. Emilys, Drs. Emily. Right.

That's when you say attorneys general, that's how you say it. Right. The Drs. Emily is that, and I have a tendency to do this, I have a tendency to normalize my situation and my behavior and then sort of say that this is what the way that it should be for other people.

And I'm, as I get older, I'm learning to do that less and less. And one of the things that they both hinted at was this idea that there's not a normal amount of sex or whatever. But if you are both on team, let's have more sex. That's a good start, right? Because that's a place that you're like, oh, we're not as satisfied as we would like to be.

So, cause you got to communicate it to some point where you can get on the same page and know what the next step is. And then if you're on that page, then okay, well, what does that look like? How do you spice it up? How do you have more sex? How do you have love me in the bedroom time?

That's kind of what I was hearing there. I, yeah, I think the best advice here is, you know, get the come as you are book, read it together, discuss it. I mean, there's even a workbook if you're into that. I just think that that will go a long way. As I was reading it in preparation for our last conversation,

Christy reread it, she had already read it years ago, and I never read it. Because as with a lot of books, she's like really into the nonfiction, self-help reference material type stuff of whatever she's into at the time. And she'll always say, I want you to read this. And you know what, I never do it.

I just say, just tell me about it. Just tell me about it. Give me the blink version. Just give me the active sex version of it. Like you read it, now just show me. Yeah, what do you want me to do? Visual aids, welcome. Right.

But reading it separately, but then talking about it together was really beneficial. And it'll get you more horny. Giving yourself a structure, and especially one that is specifically designed to talk about sex and to talk about things that maybe you're not informed about from a professional standpoint, I completely agree.

And it doesn't have, that's a great, there's a great book, but there's also other books. And I'm sure there might even be books that I don't know about that are designed for people in this exact situation. Just, you know, Google book for a couple that wants to have more sex, whatever. In fact, I think that Emily has, Emily Morris,

Dr. Emily Morris has a book about like 200 things you can do tonight, right? Yeah. That's a lot in one night. Yeah, and then Dr. Nagoski is coming out with a new book as well. Right. About keeping things fun for long-term relationships.

There's so many resources out there. It's a common thing, so don't feel weird about it, but just discuss it and make it into a little happy project. Yeah, pour some sugar on me. See what happens when you do that in the bedroom. Or just pour some sugar on each other. I've never done that.

See what happens. Straight sugar. Straight sugar. All right, voicemail. Hi Rhett and Lee, Love you guys so much. My name's Sarah. I'm just curious. I was such a fan of Sex Biscuits last year. I know Rhett and Link, both of you guys, but I feel like I heard it more from Rhett, addressed the issue of vibrators in the bedroom. And I am a young woman and I would love to use one in the bedroom. And I'm just curious how you think a woman should approach that subject with their man. How to introduce that?

You know, I feel like some men might be opposed to it, but I think a woman might very much enjoy it, as I would too. But thank you so much if you answered this. Love you guys. Have a great day. All right. We are going to answer it, so she's going to love us.

You know what? I actually think that, my guess is that many fewer men than you would think are actually threatened by a vibrator. I think that most guys are turned on by it. Again, I'm speaking for most people at this point, and maybe I'm making a mistake here. I'm just saying that as somebody who likes to think that I can get the job done, and I'm proud of myself in that area, I don't see a vibrator as a threat. I see it as just a little sexy twist.

And also, I'm into modern technology. Yeah. You know? I mean, the fact that we live, what a time to be alive, you know, that these things can exist. And sometimes they can really just get the job done. I think using a vibrator on your own can be a very viable way to figure out what works for you. And then if that's why you wanna bring it in there, a very viable way to figure out what works for you.

And then if that's why you wanna bring it in there, because it's like, hey, this can help us, this can help me when we're together, you know, and then your partner can learn from it. I mean, it's a great thing. I'm a fan of the vibrator being a part of the excursion. Oh yeah. Because it just helps, you know? And you can use them at the same time.

You can use a vibrator, which, or your partner, she can use a vibrator and then you're still penetrating. So like, it's a two for one. And if you're worried about- it's a two for one. And if you're worried about the, first of all, I just think the simplest way is just to be like, hey, ask the question, how would you feel about it? And I think you might be surprised by the answer,

like, I think that's hot, is what I think most guys would say. But if you're worried about that, here's one way you could do it. Take, I'm holding a giant vibrator. Take a vibrator, take a toothbrush, cut the head off of the toothbrush, glue the toothbrush part to the vibrator,

and then just start using it as a toothbrush for, I'd say say four to six weeks. And he'll be like, that's one hell of a vibrating toothbrush. You'd be like, yeah, it's a new thing, new tech from Colgate. I don't know, just throw a brand in there, makes it seem legitimate.

Oral-B. And you hold it like it's gonna be different. Oral-D. Yeah, it's gonna be different than those ones. But then he'll, it's like when you're trying to get a dog to be like accustomed to the crate that they're eventually gonna be in. First thing you do is you just set it in the room.

And then they're like, okay, this thing's not a threat. Maybe I'll get in there one day. You gotta slowly get a man, you have to treat a man like an animal sometimes. Yeah. And you just let him know, this thing's not a threat. That giant pink toothbrush that she's been enjoying for the past six weeks this thing's not a threat. That giant pink toothbrush that she's been enjoying for the past six weeks, it's not a threat.

Next thing you know, she's got it in the bed and he's like, oh, brushing your teeth early. And no, and then you just demonstrate what else you can do with it. And I think he'll go along with it. Yeah. If it's not about the threat, but it's just about this feels weird,

maybe there's like a grounded version of that advice that actually works. Cause I do, there's truth in what you're saying. It's like you find a way to ease into it. I don't know exactly what that is, but like, cause for us, we talked about last year, we both, you and I went and bought the same vibrator. No, we both bought the same model of vibrator.

The green worm. But we each had our own. We didn't like have to loan it out. No, you shouldn't do that. Like have a sign up sheet. Don't share it. And then remember, I put the mask on Christy and then I broke it out and just started poking her around different places. Not even, you know, I surprised her with it. In different, not just down there, but.

Yeah, under the arm. Just like, it was just like, it was just a fun little playful thing, but like I did spring it on her and I don't quite recommend that, but it was my idea and it was just like, hey, I got, and I did say, I got something. Just one idea, I'm trying to develop

some freaking advice here. I'm trying to land on something. Take a playful approach in a neutral setting where you can have a conversation about it and you can make it a little sexy. Just like, hey, I had this idea. What if we use the vibrator next time we have sex? Just think about it.

Just give him a beat. Just logging it. Just think about it. It's just an idea. Something to make more fun for both of us. We let's make more fun together. You ever touched yourself with a vibrator? Uh, yeah.

It doesn't quite do, it's a little, it can be a little overwhelming. But at times, you know. And it's nice to have sex and have your partner control the vibrator. And then it's like, there's a communication about like, what's too much? If it's like, if there's a couple of things going on at once

and then you need like, all right, let's reduce it to one thing at once. And then the other thing. And you get to a point where it's like, cause talking about like, I think it was mentioned over the last two episodes. Well, masturbating in front of your partner. A mutual masturbation sesh.

I mean, when you just say it, that seems so weird. But then it does as an idea, as an abstract idea. It's like, we're gonna walk in this room and then we're gonna each like pleasure ourselves while we watch each other. It's like, but practically speaking, it's something that can just find its way into happening. And then you find like, oh, this is just another way

that we can play together, even though we're playing with ourselves. So it's not all this start, let's decide to do this. It's more of like, let's have an attitude of play and an openness to know what are the toys that we can use here? What are the things we can try? And you just kind of keep it open-ended

and just make it an adventure and just see what happens. And try certain things, some things don't work, you can kind of pull back. You can just take the battery right out of it. And sometimes you'll surprise yourself. When you're in the heat of passion, the things that you say and the things that you do, it's like, that's part of the fun of it.

It's just like, wow, I'm surprised. I didn't even know I had this in me. You know? There's like a release of not just sexual tension, but also personality. Release your personality in the bedroom.

Yeah. Here's a story. So I have an embarrassing sex-related story. It was actually from when I lost So I have an embarrassing Sex related story It was actually from when I lost my virginity Now to most people this might sound like a dream But in fact it was not I lost my virginity in a threesome

What? Yes, a threesome Now, what made it so bad? Well let me tell you I really didn't know what to do with my hands So well, the two lovely people That I was also with know what to do with my hands so well. The two lovely people that I was also with were kind of going at it. I was kind of sitting there.

I just started doing the cha-cha because I had no clue what else to do. And they looked at me. I was very embarrassed to the point where things went soft. So, yeah. That's my sexy, sexy, embarrassing story. Yeah.

Oh, my gosh. What does the cha-cha actually look like? Is it like this? No. It's a footstep. It sounds like he was standing up. He was standing up. Yeah, it's like a little.

Like forward and backward. Yeah, forward and back. Kind of. Wow. Thanks for sharing. He was standing up. Yeah, it's like a little- Like forward and backward? Yeah, forward and back, kind of stepping. Wow, thanks for sharing. But I do believe virginity was lost. We didn't, I don't believe- Well, we don't, I don't believe- Not virginity to the cha-cha.

I don't personally believe in the loss of virginity. I don't think there is, we talked about this too. I don't believe that you have something that you're losing. Sex was had. For the first time. For the first time during a threesome. Wow. That's bold.

I've never, I mean, you can, again, when the heat of passion, you can find yourself in interesting situations and it's nice to be able to access some sort of game plan. The cha-cha, call it your personal cha-cha. And it can nice to be able to access some sort of game plan. The cha-cha. Call it your personal cha-cha. And it can't be the awkward cha-cha. I mean, I've never come anywhere close to having a threesome,

you know, as we firmly established. I've only had sex with one person. Firmly. And that's Christy. I don't, you know, it's, oh man. I don't, yeah, I wouldn't know exactly, you know, it's, man, I don't, I, yeah, I don't, I wouldn't know exactly, you know, get in where you fit in, but sometimes that's not obvious. I, now, my assumption here is that the people

who were the other two members of the threesome probably did not realize that this person had never had sex before. I'm not gonna give advice, much advice about threesomes because I don't have any experience, but it just feels to me like it would be a good guideline to be like, maybe that's not the best way for someone to lose their virginity,

or someone to have sex for the first time in the context of a threesome. That's just, you know, Especially if you're not a good multitasker like me. Uninformed opinion. It feels like chapter two at the earliest. Yeah, talking about jumping in the deep end. Wow, that's, you know what?

I mean, and again, a little sense of humor goes a long way. I think if you're doing the cha-cha and they're kind of like laughing, it's just, you know, you're just trying to own it. Well, I have to assume that them looking at him doing the cha-cha was the thing that, oh, would you like to be a part of it? Do you want us to dance as well or would you like to do what we're doing?

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its trade dress and the bat device are trademarks of Bacardi and Company Limited. Rum 40% alcohol by volume. Here's another question. Hey, Rhett and Link. This is Anonymous from Texas. People might have this question after listening to your sex episode that you just had. And coming from a similar background as y'all with the purity culture, evangelical upbringing, I would be curious to hear an expert talk, perhaps somebody that might know, and embarrassment around stamina, lasting long and whatnot so short of taking

the little blue pill i'm curious uh if y'all have experience with this or if you have any experts you know they can talk on this be blessed um any experts in the room uh nope but we can talk about stamina i mean stamina is really built up as this thing of like, and I do feel this culturally, not in my specific bedroom, but culturally this pressure to like, you know, to go long and strong. And when something can be as fun as sex,

it's like, yeah, you don't want it every time be over with in a flash. Yeah. You wanna be able to draw out the experience. But even speaking specifically about the old in and out, like you get to the actual specific, the in and out of sex. And at a certain point, you'd like for that particular action to go on for a while,

but that's difficult to do. The thrusting. The thrusting. The deal cha-cha. Is difficult to maintain, I mean, in my experience, so you find yourself mixing things up. It's like, all right, we're gonna, I'm gonna do that for a little while.

And then I'm gonna do something different. That so, you know, we're still very much engaged, but it's like, all right. So you switch gears, but also you switch practices. Yeah. Right? And you can go back and forth. So that's one thing. Now, when I started my anxiety medication,

I read about with onboarding of a medication like that, that you could have sexual side effects and that they, at a certain point when your medication leveled out, that would level out too. And I did experience that. So at first it was, yeah, it was like, everything's taking longer.

It's taking longer for me to get an erection and then it's taking longer to reach climax. And there were a few times that I did find myself uncharacteristically in my head about, well, hold on, is this gonna, am I gonna be able to pull this off? Am I gonna be able to complete the task here? And yeah, I could see how that would lead

to a downward spiral and just like everything would fizzle out. But I also experienced this middle ground where I was able to go longer and so we had a different experience. Well, actually this is interesting. Which was good. That this guy mentions the blue pill,

you know, Viagra or Cialis or whatever. And now just to finish my trajectory, it did get to a point, I don't know how long it took, that it was kind of like, I'm back to how I was before I was on the medication. I don't feel like there's actually an effect. And that's not necessarily, okay. What I have heard from multiple sources is that, okay,

so one of the reasons that we have this obsession with stamina is that a lot of us get our ideas about sex from porn and obviously the average dude in a porn can like sit there and thrust with multiple women in multiple holes for like an hour. And that is not what, and we don't use the term normal, but I'm gonna say that is not normal for me. But what I have been told is that most of these guys

doing porn, and correct me if I'm wrong, if you know the ins and outs of this, is that these guys are mostly all on SSRIs and Viagra or Cialis is one of the ways that they're able to maintain that. Cause I don't necessarily think it's always the case that, first of all, I don't think it's bad. I think that this is a positive side effects of SSRIs

is in my opinion, if it makes you last longer, as long as you don't lose the erection. Right. Yeah, it was a good experience. It kind of opened up, yeah, a different avenue. And I'm not prescribing this. I'm just saying that this is an interesting tidbit of like, if you combine the SSRI,

which you shouldn't just take SSRIs for reasons other than to treat clinical depression, a diagnosed disorder from a psychiatrist. But it's an interesting thing that they're doing both of those things in some cases where they're giving themselves the ability to go for a long time without losing the erection because of the Cialis or the Viagra.

And maybe they're not just super troopers who can go for an hour, but maybe there's some medical assistance there. Two data points for me. I talked to my dad about this on dispatches from Myrtle Beach, you know, came up in conversation cause I was asking him, he said he's used it. And I was like, yeah, but why don't you talk

about the erection that lasts for like 12 hours? He was like- That's four hours. That doesn't happen. That's what the ad says. If your erection lasts for more than four hours, call a doctor. So he's, he had some success with it, success.

Oh, I've never used it, but I definitely don't think that there's any shame in using it, and I think that, when I'm talking about like some sort of ED, you know, assistance kind of thing. Right. Definitely. If it, the moment that I'm like, I feel like I need some, I'm making the call.

You could do it online. There's no shame in that game. It's like, again, just like what a time to be alive. I met a friend for lunch. He's a friend of a friend and we were kind of getting to know each other. You actually don't know this person. And middle-aged guy. And we were talking about vacation.

We were talking about like vacation sex or something. And he was like, hey, I'll give you a, he's older than us. I think he's probably, he's in his fifties. And he said, you know what? We'll schedule a day and I'll take one of the pills. And then we'll just, it's just, he was like talking about it like it was miraculous. Like he could just go and go and go.

And it was like, so he was like giving me the inside scoop. He was like, hey. My only fear about this, because it is documented that for some men, using that kind of assistance when you're already healthy and you actually don't need it in order to have successful sex or to maintain an erection, can do something psychological

where you become dependent on it. I mean, I'm sure plenty of people use it in the way that this guy is describing, but if it's just like, oh, now do I need, I would be worried, and again, it is documented that for some men, they feel like they've become reliant on it in order to get it up and keep it up. And so I've just thought to myself,

because I've thought about this exact same thing. Cause I've heard multiple people talk about this. Like, hey, you're doing this anniversary weekend and you got a hotel or whatever, bring some Cialis along with you. Cause I think, cause one of them, I don't know. One of them is like, hey, take it now and you'll be ready in 30 minutes.

And one of them is take it and you'll be ready all day. Like for all day, I can't remember which one is which, so do your own research. But the one that's like more acute, I've thought about that. But the thing that's kept me from it is this fear that, oh, it'll be so good that then I'm gonna feel like I'm gonna become reliant on it. And then you can have this psychological effect

where you actually do have trouble. Cause it's so mental. I mean, maintaining an erection is such a mental thing. Which again. Perceive with caution. Yeah. And also, you know, maintaining the stamina can be a mental thing.

So one thing in addition to changing it up, it's like, oh, that feels too good, change it up. You can also just think about Richard Nixon. You know, you just picture- Tricky dick. You just picture someone that you're not attracted to. In my case, that would be Richard Nixon. Like Richard Nixon represents like, there's nothing about Richard Nixon that I'm attracted to.

Now, I don't want my wife to know that, hey, you're having a great time. I'm thinking about former president Richard Nixon, but hey, whatever it takes to keep going. Well, I would just be afraid to find myself start to have a Nixon fetish. You don't want to associate your wife with Richard Nixon. It hasn't happened so far with me.

All right, let's hear another story here. Hi, Ren Link. I'm going to keep my name out of this because it's pretty embarrassing. But I have a pretty weird sex-related story. My ex that I was dating, unfortunately, for about three years, one time we had just finished sorting the mail and we were cuddling and he decided that it would be funny to scoot up on the bed and pee directly on my face. I genuinely was so surprised in the moment and had absolutely no clue what was going on but um yeah we broke up a couple months after that so um unfortunately shouldn't have been with him that long in the first place but you know hindsight is 2020 anyways uh super excited for sex timber uh love you guys bye what the flying hell

i'm sorry this happened to you i I mean, consent is paramount. I don't, besides that, I'm just, it makes me angry and I don't wanna talk about this one. Besides that, it makes you angry? I mean, I don't, besides saying that, I have nothing else to say. I mean, obviously this was a big no-no, only because of the fact that she,

because of the consent thing. But let's assume, let's talk about peeing on people while we're here in this subject matter. I mean, because I want to talk about that a little bit. I'll let you do that if you want to, but you don't have to. Yeah, I don't have any experience with this. This isn't something that I have,

like I'm just saying like, let's say that this situation was- We're talking about a golden shower. I was, if the story- It does have a name. If the story was- I guess some people are into it, and they consent to it.

Well, you call it, but don't, okay. You said some people are into it. That sounded a little kink shaming to me. Some people are into everything. I don't, yeah, so yeah. I made it about consent. Yeah, well, and so, but I wanna talk about this in general though, because if,

this isn't something that has presented it. Now, again, we've established before that my wife, squirts, I established that on a previous episode. And we know that at least some of what's happening during the squirt is, it is urine. There's other stuff in there too. It's complex, not completely that well understood. But I guess in that sense, I have been peed on

in some regard, but it doesn't feel like that in the moment. It isn't like, hey, pee on me because I want you to pee on me. Now, if that's what you want, that's what you want. If that's what you want, you gotta be on the same page. And if you are, go for it. Go for it. But I don't see this being something that,

a request that I'm gonna get from Jessie for me to pee into her face. But you know what, if she asked me to, I'd be like, all right, this feels weird, and, but if you want me to try it, let's try, I don't even, the thing is is I feel like I might even be a little, I might get too gun shy in that situation.

Sometimes it takes a lot. I could be next to somebody at an airport and there's not a divider between the two urinals and I have trouble just letting it go. You know what I'm saying? I get a little stage fright. I think the psychology of this is part of the appeal for those who are into it, you know?

So being able to just let loose. Well, you know. Obviously Link really wants to move on and now I'm gaining pleasure in not letting him move on. Jenna, read an email. Okay. Just moving on. I agree, consent. Yeah, yeah.

That's a shitty person. For real? Yeah, yeah. But yeah, if people like the peeing thing, definitely go for it, have fun. But that's a shitty person. For real? Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, if people like the peeing thing, definitely go for it. Have fun. But that's not cool.

Okay. Got a story. Here's a good one. The person did put their name in the email. Well, let's just leave it on. We'll leave it anonymous. Okay.

Dear Messrs. Rhett and Link. I humbly submit the following story for Sextember 2022. It's the story of my first time with a girl. She and I met at my college dorm. Our chemistry was strong, so strong that we decided to take it to my dorm room. We're making out. It's getting hot and heavy.

You know the Meat Loaf song, Paradise by the Dashboard Light? Yeah, like that. I don't like that song, but yeah, okay. It was like that apparently, yeah. As I'm about to sheath my penis in a condom, suddenly my dorm's fire alarm goes off. It was like the stop right there part of the aforementioned song. We both panic, grabbing whatever clothes were on hand.

We followed the rest of my entire college dorm outside into the cold, pouring rain of early March. We were both miserable for a minute, but then burst out laughing. We've been together for 13 years, and we got married in April of 2020. Thanks for listening. Congratulations. Another success story. I wonder if he unsheathed it first.

Okay, I feel bad about giving this advice, but like 99% of all college dorm room fire alarms are fake. You know what I'm saying? Like, I don't want, listen, I don't want you to get burned up in a fire and I'm sorry if it happens to you. But I'm just gonna go ahead and tell you right now, most of the time, that's just some dickwad

just pulling the fire alarm for a prank. Sure, take that risk. No, I'm just saying, if it were me. It's on you, Rhett. I'm not giving the advice, I'm just saying, if it were me. First of all, I'm glad that it ended in success and now you're married, so it worked for you. But I'm just saying, put me in that situation.

I'm in a college dorm, not now, not 44-year-old Rhett, but back in the day, Rhett, and I'm sheathing it up and I'm ready to go and then the alarm goes off, I think I'm gonna be like, hey, listen, statistically speaking, this is probably not a real thing. Let's not stay out in the cold. Let's stay here and screw. That's probably how I would have handled it.

Let's make it quick. This is exciting. We can actually do both at the same time. We could evacuate and... What do you mean by evacuate? Evacuate. Evacuate is like a term for like pooping, which again, no judgment. Ejaculate. We can evacuate? Evacuate. Evacuate is like a term for like pooping, which again, no judgment.

Ejaculate. We can evacuate and ejaculate. If the consent is involved and you want someone to poop on you during a fire alarm, then that is your right. Wherever you're going, you better believe American Express will be right there with you. Heading for adventure? We'll help you breeze through security. Meeting friends a world away? You can use your travel credit. Squeezing every drop out of the last day? How about a 4 p.m. late checkout? Just need a nice place to settle in? Enjoy a room upgrade.

Wherever you go, we'll go together. That's the powerful backing of american express visit amex.ca slash ymx benefits vary by card terms apply all right here's this hey red and link uh big fan sean here uh just curious uh have you guys ever dealt with post-nut clarity? That's rough. It's a rough ride. Just immediately afterwards when you're done doing your thing, you just sit in celerity and just kind of think about life.

So yeah, just kind of curious on that. Kind of curious on how your post-nut clarity has changed over the years. So yeah, thanks guys of curious on that, kind of curious on how your post-nut clarity has changed over the years. So yeah, thanks guys. Love what you do. Peace. Post-nut clarity is not something that I've ever heard named,

but the only way I relate to it in that, I guess it's akin to when you ejaculate, then it's just like, there's the trope of, I've totally lost interest, like, or it's over. Like I can just roll over and go to sleep or whatever. No, no, this is a well-established phenomenon. But like being sharper mentally? No.

I can definitely relate to like jerking off and then being really, feeling really guilty about it. Well, I think- At a young age in the environment I grew up in. I think it's more, what I've always understood this concept to be is just like, I was thinking with my other head and now I'm thinking once again with my brain head.

And usually you hear this in the context of like, oh, I was having sex with somebody that I didn't really want to, or I was being driven by my sexual energy in a way that then once it was released, I was like, how the hell did I get myself in this situation? Like regret. Yeah, and then in the context of like porn,

if you picture like the quintessential like teen who's gone down a rabbit hole into some just, you know, you're watching like 80 Russian elderly ladies have an orgy or something. You're really way down the rabbit hole of porn and then you think to yourself, why am I watching this? And how have I got to this point right after you masturbate? That's how I've heard about it.

Okay. But I remember this as a teen, especially as a teen in purity culture who thought that masturbation was wrong. And so then you would be like, oh man, now I see how wrong this is and I'm praying about being forgiven. It sucked, it was horrible.

So that version of clarity. But this isn't much of a phenomenon as a middle-aged man at this point. So I don't think I've been like harnessing my post-nut clarity. I think I've just been going to sleep. I mean, I'm definitely gonna tell Christy that like sex makes me smarter for a limited time.

Yeah, right. So it's like, that's something I haven't sold. It's hard to talk yourself into making long-term financial decisions right after you have sex, but apparently that would be a good idea. Let's hear this story. Hey Rhett and Link. I had an encounter with a lovely woman I recently met and we hit it

off great, had a few dates and we eventually ended up at Vibe Place and basically the mail was going to be sorted and she paused and looked at me and specifically asked to not have her socks taken off at any point i obviously agreed and whatever but i mean what's the deal with socks staying on during sexy time jenna you're having a reaction to this i i am i from a my viewpoint of it is is that she perhaps uh hasn't had a pedicure in a while or there's like uh an ingrown toenail that she's embarrassed about i don't see it as like there's some practical reason there's a practical reason she wanted to keep it cold just yeah or her feet get extremely cold and she doesn't want to shock him with her freezing feet.

Yeah. And the fact that she said it's up front, I don't see a big deal with the socks thing at all. I find it kind of sexy. I mean, I find it sexy when a woman leaves her shoes on, first of all. Knocking the boots. Because then it feels like an athletic event. I find it sexy when a woman leaves her shoes on, first of all, because if- Knocking the boots.

Because then it feels like an athletic event. It feels like we may be being scored by judges. You know what I'm saying? Like if you got on shoes, and again, I mean, I think the sexiest thing, and this is probably like some unresolved misogyny, is I love women in high heels. I'm working through that.

But you know, there's- Are you? There's a class- You're sitting around working on your view of high heels? I'm trying to like naked ladies in high heels less with every day that passes. But is it not a sexy thing? Do you find it, is it a sexy thing,

when a naked lady in high heels? I just love socks, man. I love stockings. But I do believe that- For me it's not about the heel, it's about the fabric of the calf. But I also think maybe I have a disposition, a bias towards this because my wife is 5'3 and I'm 6'7.

Yeah. So heels actually, you know what? In my case, women wearing heels is all about equity. It's all about us being closer to the same height. To your height. Why don't you just bend over more? You see, I just made it a very progressive thing. But here's the thing.

I kind of think that maybe like wearing like some Air Jordans or something, like wearing some cross trainers, wearing something that makes you feel athletic. Like, listen, if there is a fire alarm, we'll be the first ones out there. Both of you put those kinds of shoes on and maybe a headband and wristbands, gloves even. Things that make you feel like you're going to work,

doing something that matters. Anything that like makes it different can be something that can make it exciting. A trucker hat. Yeah, and especially if you're getting to know your partner and they, you know, you gotta acknowledge that this is a point of putting themselves out there. There's a risk involved in saying,

hey, I don't wanna, don't take my socks off. Be like, you know what? I love your socks and I'm so glad you don't wanna take them off. I got more socks, we can double up. You wanna put in, can I keep my socks on too? It's like everything's an opportunity to just get hornier. You ever worn just a belt?

Like, yeah, no. Yeah, well, I haven't either, but it just struck me as that might be cool. Hey, let's just wear belts tonight. We just have belts on, nothing else. Yeah. I mean, why not, right? How do you have the best sex?

Belt. Like a utility belt? A utility belt's got all the little vibrators and stuff in there. Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew! You'd be like Batman up in there. So yeah, I mean, you wanna turn everything into a turn on, and when somebody shares more of themself,

that's a turn on, double down on it. Don't question somebody's request if it can be easily accommodated. I mean, you don't wanna put up any barriers. You know what I'm saying? Jenna, do you have another email? Yes, this story I have thoughts on. Here it goes.

Are you ready for a pathetic story? My first boyfriend and I had breakup sex. He lasted 30 wriggly seconds. Then he got up, farted, and asked if he could have my Diablo 2 account since I didn't like playing it anyway. I said no. Then he left and we never saw each other again. Believe in fairy tales, people. Well, were all three of these things related? I mean, maybe they're just all, it all just coincided.

Short amount of sex, a fart that was unanticipated, and oh, while I'm thinking about it, Diablo 2. You know, we are grouping these things together, at least in the context of the story, as if they are related. So maybe we just go with that. Yeah, I just don't know about, like, tying up loose ends, like,

ending a sentence in an exclamation point, but it's a fart after sex, I just... That's weird, man. I mean, it's a little flagrant. It's a little flagrant. You know, flagrant foul. Don't bring farts into the bedroom if you can help it, or unless you're into it. Unless it's asked for.

Yeah, yeah. What are your thoughts? Maybe, I think he probably should have asked about the Diablo 2 account before the sex and farting. Or if he was asking about it after, I think he should have put in a bit more effort into the sex part if he was going to ask this big thing. Right. Yeah. Read the room, man. Of his ex-partner.

Yeah. Read the room. But yeah, I think if that was my ex that I was having breakup sex with, and that happened to me, I would think the appropriate response would be, well, at least your farts last longer than you do. And then skipping, like that is so. Dang, that's hard to remember though, in the moment.

In the moment you're. That was good. If that happens to you. In the moment you're probably. I think in the moment I'd just be kind of like, okay. It could be a text later. A text later. Break up text. No, no, immediately blocked. I'm like, you know what? I wanna completely forget this entire.

Farts last longer than you do. I mean the whole not lasting a long time for breakup sex, that's not surprising because if you think about it- You taking up for this guy? No, no, no, I'm saying the step one, the first step is I don't think that that's where he went wrong. Because what I'll say is I don't have this experience

because I've only had sex with one woman and we've never broken up. But if my wife goes out of town or I go out of town and you get back together, sometimes that first reunion, you don't last as long because you're super excited, right? Yeah. And so if you've broken up with somebody

and you haven't had sex in a while and you hadn't done the old something about Mary where you kind of get one out of the chamber before you get together, which I do recommend. If you haven't done that, you might only last 30 seconds, but in that moment after you, this is where post-nut clarity really comes into play.

If you have lasted 30 seconds and you're like, I think I would be like, oh, I'm sorry, you're just so hot or something like that, you know? Yeah. And then if be like, oh, I'm sorry, you're just so hot, or something like that, you know? Yeah. And then if I had to fart, I wouldn't, because I'm, at least at this age, I still can not fart when I don't want to most of the time. Not everybody can.

And I don't play Diablo. I didn't play Diablo 1. So, I just can't, at that point, I just can't relate at all. I feel like the first step was, how he responded after that first slip up is where he started going wrong. After Jenna's comeback, I got nothing to add.

That was amazing. I feel like- I think it just all feels very intentional. Like he went in knowing it was gonna be short, he was gonna do something gross, and then he was gonna ask about some video game. I'm not a fan of this person. No, no, yeah.

I think it's good they broke up. Wow. We have one last voicemail here. No. Oh, that's not it. Right down there. Hi, Rhett and Link. I have a very funny story in response to your sex timber tweet about my poor friend when we were babies in college. We weren't literal babies, but we were very young people, 18 or 19. And she had, sorry, it's so funny, never given a blowjob before.

And she had started dating this guy and they were about to, you know, go all the way. She was telling me all about it and how she wanted to try to give him a blowjob that night. And so the next day I asked her how it went. And she was like, I don't know, it was kind of weird. I don't think that he was super into it. And I was very confused. I said, what was he not into? What did you do? Apparently my poor sweet friend took the name blowjob very literally. went down there and just was blowing cold air on his genitals for a solid two or three minutes before he finally was like, yeah, no, we're not doing that anymore. They went on to go do other things. And my poor sweet angel friend was horrified when I told her what actually a blowjob entailed. So it was pretty funny. This is why sex education is important, everybody.

And that's all I have to say, bye. That's why I call it a suck job. You know, you just, let's just get it. Let's just say what it is. Oh my gosh. Just, I mean, was it, was there a distance there? Like blowing from a distance? I feel like total, like a total,

like get on it and then blow it up like an inflatable tube. If I was horny enough and I hadn't had sex in long enough, I feel like you might be able to get me with just air. You know what I'm saying? With like, if it was like a pneumatic thing. That would be a fun precursor, but like if you're latching on and then you're just, you're blowing, I mean, is it-

There was no latching. Will that go to the urethra? Will that go up to the bladder? Oh, you're saying if you- Could the bladder explode? If you, yeah, if you blow it, like that wasn't what was happening in this scenario. This was blowing from a distance.

Like actually blowing up a balloon. You don't wanna do that. Yeah, that can cause a lot of issues. I totally thought that, I'm in that poor girl's boat. I 100% thought- This was you? Yeah, 100% thought that a blowjob meant you blow on a penis. From a distance.

From a distance. But you don't have to answer this question if you don't want to. I understand her being mortified. But did you have a similar experience, or this was a thought that you had? I had a similar experience. You don't have to answer it, Jenna. You don't have to answer it.

She already did. It's okay. I've had a lot of embarrassing things. We're good. We're good. But yeah, I blew on my boyfriend's penis, and I thought that's what a blowjob was. And then what?

It was very awkward. We moved on quickly to something else. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I learned later. Later? That that's incorrect. He probably just thought you were creative. I was creative. but then I learned later that that's incorrect. He probably just thought you were creative.

I was creative. We're just trying out something new and fun. She's got a different take on things. Blowing around the area. I think I blew on his balls at one point too. Okay, Jenna. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, you can blow on anything you want.

You can blow? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I could blow, yeah. Yeah, yeah, it's like, yeah, I've gotten breath. I've seen a birthday cake before. More defying. Yeah, yeah. I know what to do here.

Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. Sorry, do my Jimbo. Okay. Okay. But she is not alone. That woman is not alone. Been there. This concludes our sex timber. The fact that this was a story from this woman

and then you had the same experience, I mean, this is not an uncommon thing. Why is it called a blow job? Why even call it that? Like, I don't know. It's like, really, I just don't know. I just don't know why. I can't.

Of all the words that it could have been, that's the phrase that won out. Right. I don't know why. There's a lot of sex terms that don't make sense. Yeah. But this one is one that just feels like a real, real miss. I mean, fellatio is just a really great name. That's just a technical term.

I don't know why it would ever be called a blow job. I guess because it's like, oh, it's just my, it's explosive. I don't know. I think you're making your mouth looks like you might be blowing. Maybe the first time someone saw somebody doing it, they're like, I think she might be blowing on this thing.

I mean, I'm not the one here. This is a third party analysis. It was a doctor watching a video. It's like, oh, she is now blowing on his thing. I mean, I'm not the one here. This is a third party analysis. It was a doctor watching a video. It's like, oh, she is now blowing on his penis. He seems to enjoy it, blow job. She looks like she's working, blow job. Why is it a job? Exactly.

It's like no one wants to do it. Right, right, that's the other part I don't like about it. It should be a suck favor. A lick fantasy. You know what I'm saying? It's like, yeah, it's- It's not just suck, to do it. Right, right, that's the other part I don't like about it. It should be a suck favor. A lick fantasy. You know what I'm saying? It's like, yeah, it's- It's not just suck, you don't wanna suck too hard either. I don't wanna call it a suck favor. Call it a...

It's like a Tootsie Pop, how many licks does it take? To get to the... But if you have to, I mean, yeah. Don't bite, yeah. I don't know. Gently, gently. What's a word for sucking on something with an intention to lick on it, not just to suck on it? I think there's probably a German word for it.

I think, what about more of like a sloppy savor? Savory. I don't know. We know, we all know now. I think we'll just go with blowjob. Let's go with blowjob. We'll go with blowjob and just take the funny stories as they come.

Wow, I am exhausted. I am totally just, I don't have a recommendation. Well, we don't have to have a recommendation because we talked to two incredibly insightful doctors who have incredible resources. You know, we talked about Sex with Emily, the podcast, follow her books. Follow them, go for it.

That's the rec. We got Dr. Emily Nagoski's book, Come As You Are, which we've already rec'd one time in her book that's coming out. Let's do it again. So just, you know what? Check out their resources. We have to tell you multiple times. You have to hear something, you have to hear the gospel 19 times

before you make a decision, Link. So you're hearing this you multiple times. You have to hear something, you have to hear the gospel 19 times before you make a decision, Link. So you're hearing this wreck multiple times. Next week, we're going to be having a special listening party for a very special, is that it? Yeah. Is that it? That is what we're doing next, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. A special listening party for a special,

I can't talk anymore. I told you, I'm burnt to a sexual crisp. Yeah, so this coming week. For a special project. This coming week, a couple of things will happen. Actually, when you're hearing this, my new single, Give a Damn, just came out this past Friday, if you're listening to Ear Biscuits when it comes out.

And then on the 23rd, the whole album will come out and we're gonna listen to the entire thing right here. And here are Link's analysis of it. Yeah, it's like a, it'll be a little listening party for us. Come next week, in the meantime, hashtag Ear Biscuits. I just will say, you'll get more out of next week's podcast if you listen to the full album. Beforehand. Beforehand.

So James and the Shame. Good point. Human Overboard, 11 songs. It's out there. Takes you less than 45 minutes or so to listen to the whole thing and then we'll talk about it next week. In the meantime, we do wanna hear your responses. Hashtag Ear Biscuits, 188 EarPod One. Hi Rhett and Link.

It's Amanda. I love listening to everything you guys do. Even as a lesbian woman, having sex with only her wife, sex timber is something we both enjoy and gives us a lot of new information that sometimes we aren't allowed to try. So thank you so much for doing all that and thank you, Jenna,

for adding a female body into the information. Hi, Rhett and Link. This is Trang, longtime listener, first time Ear Biscuits participant. You guys mentioned that nobody has ever gotten sick from blue balls before. And I just wanted to let you know that my boyfriend did make a visit to the ER for having what I like to call blue balls. Since he had free fluid in his balls that were really painful. And he just rested for a couple days. Hey, my name is Jake. I'm from Philadelphia.

and I just wanted to thank you both get some appreciation for mentioning asexuality in the latest episode of September I'm asexual and it's something that you don't hear about ever really the only reason it took me a long time to figure out

is because you don't hear about it so just even a small mention like that means a great deal and for you guys to treat it very legitimately and not like there's something wrong with the person or like it's a medical issue, it feels great. Hey guys, this is Summer and I just need to thank you all for Sextember. Like it has been something that I've been listening to with my husband. And because of it, my husband and I have had the best sex of our lives. We were already open and talked about sex before, but it's just created even more conversations.

And I really think that you guys need to be thanked for it. And so thanks again for sex-tember. Love you guys. Can't wait to listen to the next episode.