Effectively Wild: A FanGraphs Baseball Podcast - Effectively Wild Episode 2000: We Thought of More Things We Like About Baseball

Episode Date: April 29, 2023

In the fourth incarnation of a time-honored tradition that recurs every 500-ish episodes, Ben Lindbergh and Meg Rowley are joined by former co-hosts Sam Miller and Jeff Sullivan, and The Athletic’s Grant Brisbee, to draft assorted things that they like about baseball, followed (1:37:06) by a Past Blast from 2000. Audio intro: Benny and the Jeffs, […]

We love to get our bats boned We believe in Garnet Jones And that there's nothing Mike Trout cannot do We've been listening from the start And we're listening still When we don't know the answers We say Rich Hill, Ben and Jeff and Sam. It's all because of you. Effectively Wild, the only podcast that effectively quenches our thirst for stats.

Hello and welcome to episode 2000, 2000, 2000 of Effectively Wild, a baseball podcast from Fangraphs. I am Ben Lindberg of The Ringer, joined by Meg Raleigh of Fangraphs. Hello, Meg. Hello. We have at times poked fun at the fetish for round numbers and semi-arbitrary numerical milestones in baseball and in life. And yet, we sort of observe it ourselves in that every 500-ish episodes, we celebrate the continued existence of this sport and this show and ourselves by drafting things we like about baseball with three friends. The first of them is podcast co-founder and former co-host Sam Miller, now of the Pebble Hunting sub stack. Hello, Sam. Hi, Ben. The second is

former co-host and current analyst for the first place Tampa Bay Rays. My analysis suggests that they're having an excellent season so far. Jeff Sullivan. Hello, Jeff. Hi, Ben and Meg. an excellent season so far. Jeff Sullivan. Hello, Jeff. I've been and Meg. I've been introduced. Wow. Snubbing Sam already, and also snubbing the third friend and the

fifth beetle of Effectively Wild, Grant Beersbury of The Athletic. Hello, Grant. I don't know whether you're George Martin or Billy Preston or Stu Sutcliffe or someone else, but we're happy to have you regardless. I'll go with Billy Preston because if you saw that Peter Jackson documentary, when he came in, everyone else stopped bickering. He was a calming presence. So that's what I am.

You guys, if I'm not here, you guys are just sniping at each other. Just Grant tickling the keys over there. Tickling the old purlies. So we still like baseball and the show and each other enough to continue this tradition. So here we are. I love the enough addition there. Like, how much? You know, enough.

Enough. Well, at first I wondered. I mean, we've already drafted several things we like about baseball. So I wondered whether I had exhausted my resource, my well of things that I liked about baseball, but I discovered that no, there are still some things that I like that we have not drafted yet. They may have come up at some point in the previous 1999 episodes, because I think I've expressed every thought that I have ever had or will have in my head

at some point during the run of this podcast. And probably I'm just repeating myself at this point. So thanks everyone for sticking around. But yeah, still some stuff I like about this silly sport. And I hope the same is true of all of you. Yeah. No, of course, of course. So much love to give.

The love you take is equal to, I guess that wasn't a Billy Preston lyric, but he was around perhaps. Anyway. I don't think he was around. No, I mean, that was a different album. Yeah, right. Anyway, so we're all here and we're doing the same thing that we've done before. So that's fun. I guess I could maybe quickly recap what has been drafted before.

Just a rapid fire. Just read off the Effectively Wild wiki. I was just reading some of these things and some of them, I don't know what they were. It's just based on the description on the wiki. I really, I couldn't tell you what exactly it is, but maybe you'll all recall or the listeners will. So if you don't want to be spoiled about episode 500, 996, and 1500, skip ahead a minute or just go back and listen to them first. How much does it bother you that it was nine 96?

It does actually. I don't, Sam, do you remember why it was nine? Why was it nine 96? Well, for two reasons. One is that we had a,

uh, preexisting date with Kevin Goldstein who vowed to only appear once we got to episode a thousand. Uh, and two is that episode a thousand was my, my farewell. And so we, um, we didn't, at a certain point, I don't know, roughly around episode nine 97, you decided it wasn't going to be the show's farewell. But up to that point, we thought that that was going to be the end of it. And so I think that it, uh, made sense to squeeze a few hits into the final week. Yeah. Okay. Anyway, I don't know who in their right mind does 2000 episodes of a podcast, but I'm glad that it's still going so that we can

convene again today. I was going to ask if you actually wish it had ended with Sam's departure. We've had some good times in the past several years. Would you say enough? Yeah, I would say enough good times that I'm pleased that it didn't end there. So here's what was drafted. Here's what Sam has drafted in the past. Babe Ruth and Ernie Shore. I guess specifically the Ernie Shore relieving Babe Ruth and pitching a no-hitter from that point?

It was Ernie Shore as... Oh, the Simpsons. Yeah, what is that guy's name? Why am I blanking on it? Grant, you know, Simpsons stuff. You know, the one where Homer's got the co-worker and everything goes wrong. Oh, Frank Grimes.

Yeah, exactly. So Ernie Shore as Frank Grimes. Yeah, exactly. So Ernie Shore is Frank Grimes. Right, right. And then radio commercials during baseball broadcasts, which was a frequent topic during your days co-hosting this podcast. GM's making predictions, which was also a frequent topic of the podcast and your writing. The worst ever sacrifice bunt.

Oh, that's a great one i love that's a great pick let's just do it again i don't remember what the worst ever sacrifice but was mark woolers had like a historic case of the yips and in the middle of it doug glanville bunted on 20 like markler's had thrown like 26 balls in a row. And then Doug Blanfield just bunted on 2-0 to sacrifice a guy over. Matt Kemp's rap album. Still want to hear it. He's still in the studio.

Phil Necro being old. And specifically looking old on his baseball cards. Willie Mays' house party. Oh, great one. That's a good one. I don't recall what that was. You just have neighborhood kids over. Yeah, like a hundred of them.

Partying with Willies. Oh, right. Yeah, okay. That came up in the documentary, I think, that we saw recently. Bo Jackson's 1990 score baseball card number 697. Worth $8. Worth a maximum of $8, which was what made that one great. The 1989 to 1991 amateur drafts of the Houston Astros.

Oh, yeah. Still waiting on those drafts to pan out. Yeah. All right. Grant's picks. The other Ryan Braun. I wonder what he's up to these days. Stupid pick.

That was your first ever pick, too. You had everything on the board. Everything about baseball was on the board at that point. Except Babe Ruth. Except, yeah. Tell me that I didn't open my laptop right before the podcast. You know, like, oh, crap, Effectively Wild. It was a slight reach at number one overall, all time, I think. I mean, it probably would have fallen to the second round, I think. Sweet Christmas. Can't take any chances.

When baseball players are mentioned in rap or hip hop lyrics. Oh wait. Well, Randy Velarde. Yeah. Was that? Yeah.

Randy Velarde. Action Bronson had a Randy Velarde drop searching for players with dirty words in their name on baseball reference in it. Like, like that's like the fourth through seventh letters. Well, like it's embedded within the name? More like Dick Hurts, but like, you know.

Okay. Also, yeah. I will accept like a, I don't know, Mendick would also work. So, yeah. Jeff, has your occasional Twitter thread competition with John Boyce of Silly Baseball Names been going on longer than this podcast has? Or not quite as long? I don't know, Ben. Okay. It's been going on

for a long time. I always enjoy it when that's revised. The sadness of undoing your rally caps. That's the best pick anybody has made in this entire... That would be my first pick if we were drafting picks. If you were drafting the picks that were drafted.

Home run reactions from pitchers. How talented umpires are. Searching baseball reference for player names from the 1904 season, specifically. Going back to the well. The fact that Paul Giamatti is the son of former MLB commissioner, a Bartlett Giamatti. All right. Jeff's picks probably has the highest ratio of,

I don't know what that was of anyone's probably. And I'm sure it has a high ratio for Jeff, not knowing what it was, but Petco Park scoreboard faces in 2005 or 2006. Jeff wasn't sure which one. I still see them. Reactive player expressions. I don't know, but it feels like that might've been like a pitcher home run reactions,

which feels like I was double drafted. Yeah. Grant took that already. Anyway, John Allrood. Already. I believe this is the first episode. Oh, maybe so. Okay. So maybe Grant was, yeah, Grant took that already. Anyway, John Allrood's... Already? I believe this is the first episode. Oh, maybe so. Okay.

So maybe Grant was... John Allrood's tree battle with neighbor. That's my second overall pick. That was a good one. If we're picking... Yeah, it was like a tree was obscuring John Allrood's view or vice versa or something. Yeah. Property dispute.

or something. Yeah. Property dispute. The Baltimore Orioles offseason rumor mill, which is no more interesting now than it was many years ago when you drafted that, probably. I feel like now they've stopped

being connected to guys in the first place. Yeah, right. They have good players now, but also when there are rumors about someone they might be interested in, it's still not that interesting. Fernando Rodney,

just Fernando Rodney. Bill Bergen, I know you loved Bill Bergen and his offensive ineptitude. This one I recall, feeling hopeful about a team in spring slash until they lose their first game, which I remember because Sam mocked your mockish sentimentality because you were working with the Rays. And I think he suggested that next you were going to draft the green of the grass and the crack of the bat.

But it's very relevant that you took that then because it took a really long time for the Rays to lose their first game this year. So I guess you got to feel hopeful for a long time. You probably still feel hopeful now that they're a mere 21-5. No, it got weird. After a little bit, you start rooting for that first loss because it started to feel unpleasant

because the pressure was too high for games against shitty teams in April. You forget what... The first loss was an unpleasant experience, but i felt a lot better after that than i did like when we were 13 and now if that makes i don't know it's hard to explain but i'm glad that we lost yeah well you know you're gonna lose eventually so i guess

i didn't well your your next pick was the unsolvability of baseball, and clearly the Rays have solved it at this point, so I guess that pick no longer applies. And fan understanding of managers. That's a very good one. interventions, which is something I still enjoy. Platoons, players being afraid of weather, pitchers' bodies when they're throwing, which is not something I like at all, actually. It disgusts me. I don't know why I drafted that as something I like. Mike Trout, I guess that's a gimme. That should have been like the free space on the bingo card in this draft.

Quad A players, first baseman doing the splits, and incorrect and exaggerated appraisals of player value in the pre-war era. One of my favorite things about baseball. Meg, who joined for this exercise in episode 1500, drafted baseball scandal names involving horniness. I don't know exactly what that means, but... The banging scheme, Ben. It means the banging scheme.

Merkel's boner. Oh, okay. Snodgrass is muff and so forth. Yeah, like, come on. Okay, yeah. Well, that foreshadowed much of our recent content on this podcast. Yeah, get your head in the game, Ben. Goof-based walk-offs.

I don't remember what that means. Fans misjudging foul balls. Yeah, I love that. When pitchers figure it out. Yeah. Wait, how many picks did you get? This is a question that we had before recording. Because, you know, my M.O. for drafts is like, I do some prep and then I panic.

And I'm like, I don't know what my last couple picks will be. And so I said to Ben before we got on, I was like, I do some prep and then I panic and I'm like, ah, I don't know what my last couple picks will be. And so I said to Ben before we got on, I was like, I only have two things. And then later it was like, I have 11. She had 11 next to her. You're like the 1989 to 1991 Astros of drafting. You drafted

when pitchers figured out and the friends we met along the way i think that we maybe only did three and then you were like who has stuff left and i was like okay let me because a lightning round yeah because you know i came along late so i had i had space to fill on the card yep all right so we've got some brand new ones here, I think, at least hopefully most of us do. Jeff's had a busy week just winning every baseball game. Meg has enough picks to go around. She can pitch draft for Jeff or he can just draft. No, I'm going first.

Okay, first pick, pitch clock. All right, second, you're on the board. Yeah, everyone loves the pitch clock. Do you think that front office people are high on the list of people who value the pitch clock? I mean, you work remotely, so you don't have to be in the office necessarily during games. But I would imagine that people who do, it's probably like they love the pitch clock even more than, say, I love the pitch clock. Of course, highest on the list. But you know what? Who cares? I only care about me. Pitch clock. We haven't had a game over than say I love the pitch clock. Of course. Highest on the list. But you know what? Who cares?

I only care about me. Pitch clock. We haven't had a game over three hours yet. Pitch clock. Best thing about baseball. Hands down. Zero question. It's like, you know, like in a, in a, like a sitcom or whatever, the comedy, like the

comedy writers are trying to like write for each other, just trying to make each other laugh, you know, nevermind the audience. Yeah. Forget about the fans. Pitch clock. It's the best. We did it for us and it's awesome. I think the fans like it too.

They didn't know that they would necessarily, but it's just great. So, yeah. All right. Well, we don't have to decide who's going to go first. Cause Jeff just jumped the gun and selected the pitch clock.

So the pitch clock is now off the board. Apologies to anyone who had pitch clock on their list. Who wants to go next? Grant, do you have any alternate player names that you want to get out there before anyone else steals them? Searching for names on baseball reference, but this time with a twist. No. on baseball reference, but this time with a twist. No. Let's see. I am really into the idea of discovering that a celebrity played in the minor leagues in the past.

And I'm running out of them, but there's always a new one. Because I was going to draft how Geddy Lee donated his collection of autographed Negro League baseballs to the Negro League Hall of Fame. And that's just cool as heck. He had this big collection. He donated to the museum. It's there as the Geddy Lee collection. And I just think that's fascinating. But as I was doing my draft prep work, right in the middle was the signature of Charlie Pride, who's a country music legend,

former part owner of the Rangers. I knew that. I knew he had a connection to the Rangers. I didn't know he actually played in the minor leagues. I love that stuff. Like Randy Macho Man Savage. I loved when I first found out about that. Chuck Connors, the Rifleman.

The guy who plays Luke on Gilmore Girls. Really? Yeah. Yes. Yes. Stuff like that. There's a Hall of Fame football player, Deion Sanders, who's like he was a college coach. He actually played baseball.

Stuff like that. I love that sort of stuff. So I will take surprising celebrity baseball connections. Yeah. Chuck Connors played in the big leagues, right? But, but yeah, I think so. John Elway is a good one, right? Or does it, do you like the, the other sport star or is this mostly people who are not famous for, for athletics? No, I'll take that. You know, I'll take that. Uh, uh, the giants drafted golden Tate, take that you know i'll take that uh uh the giants drafted golden tate um former seahawks receiver uh he had no interest in playing baseball really but the giants drafted him for you know get some jiggles or whatever so that is that's totally acceptable um i'll i'll even go a step further

and say you know uh george w bush perhaps becoming the commissioner of baseball at one point and the funny little pathways that this world might have taken if that were the case. I'm well versed in all this stuff. Yeah, it's a good one. All right, Sam, you want to go? Let's see. It's in between innings and the pitcher's warming up. I'm going to take the first baseman rolling ground balls to the other infielders, which is just strikes me as not suitable to their skill level, if that makes sense. These are baseball players who are obviously have fielded hundreds of thousands of ground balls that were actually hit to them from the correct angle. And I just

feel like getting a slow roller thrown to you by the first baseman doesn't really prepare you for anything. And yet they do it. They do it. It's part of the job. So they show up, they feel the slow roller thrown across the infield from the wrong angle to them. And they use two hands, then they throw it back. It reminds me of like, if, if every time I sat down to write an article, I had to first take out one of those like kindergarten sheets of paper with like the dotted line and like work on my letters. And I had to do it every time, like get up for lunch, come back to the article, work on your letters first. So I don't know why they do it every time. Like, get up for lunch, come back to the article, work on your letters first.

So I don't know why they do it. Part of it must be for the spectator experience, right? Like the entertainment value. You think so? I don't know. There's not a lot of entertainment value, but it's like the hold music of baseball games, kind of. It's like, you know, it's not good. It's not entertaining.

And yet, if it were just silence, you would wonder, am I still on? But you know, so you have to have something right. And, and maybe you might even find yourself tapping your foot from time to time and surprise yourself. So if they were just standing out there doing absolutely nothing, that would be awkward, right? Not just because we're used to them doing something, but also like they, they wouldn't know what to do with their hands. This is something what to do with their hands. This is something that they do with their hands. Yeah, they could just go out later.

I mean, I think that— Do you feel the same about the outfielders who—like the outfielder warming up with the bat boy who's— Yeah. You know, like the left fielder warming up at the bat boy who's standing in foul territory. Is that for show? Well, I don't know. They at least they get some distance on, they're not like gunning it, but they're at least throwing a distance. And I, I like that because I always think how cool a job that would be right to, to

be the kid out there who gets to warm up the outfielder. So I kind of like that they do that, but whether there's any actual utility to it, I doubt it. But no one would notice if outfielders just stood out there, so they don't really have to do anything. They just do anyway. I will say that I have a different relationship with this tradition because I'm coaching eight and nine-year-old girls in softball. Part of my duties is to be the first base coach, and I out there and I'm keeping score and I'm coaching the team or whatever. And the other team will be in the field. They're doing this. They're rolling the ball to each other and I'm not paying attention. And that's bad because this is not

like a given that they're going to pick up the ball and throw it to their target. The first baseman might not even lift their glove up because they're distracted or bored or they just don't feel like it. The player throwing might overthrow the first baseman and hit me in the head, which has happened. So I have a very different relationship to where it's adventure. It's chaos in a great way. It's like, what's going to happen next? And I really appreciate that. Have you gotten bonked, Grant? Have you gotten bonked in the head? Or hit in the beans? I've gotten bonked. I've gotten, no, not in the beans. Not in the beans.

I have gotten hit in the chest with an aluminum bat. It's a war zone out there, man. It's a war zone. Probably not great bat speed, though, at that level. The youth infield warmup, it's true that that was a learning experience because that's how your coach would basically teach you always be paying attention because someone would get bonked on those, uh, every year that there'd be wild throws. They wouldn't get caught. Someone would get hit.

And then your coach would yell at the kid on the ground, uh, for not paying attention. And that's how you learn. You have to pay attention. You learn that lesson on your way to the emergency room. You have to pay attention, not just in sports, but in life, Sam. I knocked a kid's teeth out one time when we were warming up. And I don't know, he just got like someone, he thought he heard someone say his name and he looked over right as my warmup throw was coming at him, hit him in the mouth, knocked his teeth out. He had to go get, know repairs done and i swear to you

like as he was leaving the field the coach i'm not naming names here i really want to name names here but the coach goes that's why you have to pay attention guys it's like the arrested development that's why that's why you have to yeah i wonder if part of it is eyewash also just you know wanting to appear to be giving effort. Because you're right, they could just sit in the dugout until it's time to play. And if Zach Greinke had gotten his wish and were a shortstop or whatever, he probably would do that. That's something he would do because he will report the last possible date for spring training. Because he will not show up early.

He'll show up at the mandatory time. And he did that at some point. He's like, I didn't even know we could show up this late. This is great. So if he were a position player, he'd probably be coming out there like when the last warmup pitch was being thrown. But anyone else, if they did that, they'd look like they weren't putting the proper effort out there. So maybe it's partly just like we have to appear to be practicing and honing our craft at all times. I think you got it early. Like it's fundamentally just make work because it's just really uncomfortable

to be standing in front of anywhere between 10 and 45,000 people just doing nothing. You know, like if you're just like standing in a corner, you would put your hands in your pockets, kind of look around, kind of like try to look busy.

It's why we all look at our phones all the time if we don't have anything to do. Like if you have a bunch of guys just out there standing while like the pitcher and catcher are actually doing something, they would feel really, really uncomfortable. So they're just doing something. It's effectively eyewash, but it's not so it looks like they're like working hard.

It's so that it looks like they're anything. Yeah. And I will say that one thing that we're overlooking here is that it's neat to have a ball rolling towards you to scoop it up and then to throw that ball like that's just neat you think they still get a thrill yeah it's neat it's yeah how do you not just like doing that every time you're throwing a throwing the dang horse head around you think that they don't just throw it to the first baseman thinking like he there's no way he's gonna do it again And then it comes back and they're like, I don't think he's getting it. Somewhat related to this,

I wrote a couple weeks ago about the Around the Horn, the tradition of the Around the Horn. And what Paul Dixon suggested in the Dixon Baseball Dictionary, that the Around the Horn was originated perhaps as show, as entertainment, as a way of entertaining the fans with your skill. And I thought, that's not my pick, but it's sort of a subset of the pick that players still do that. Like, they just are so, they just can't stop trying to get praise that they're like, like, look, we can even throw the ball to each other without dropping it. Like, check this out. You know, I mean, like the things

that they do, they're athletes of like, just, I mean, in 1877, when this supposedly was originated, they didn't have gloves. Yeah. It was hard to catch back then. Right. It was. And the, you know, the ball was misshapen and they were, some of them didn't have hands. I don't remember. Anyway, nowadays, though, they're like really, truly elite. And still they're like, throw it and catch it. You know?

Like, look how good we are. Well, you know, they had to do that because they like, they didn't have stand-up comedy yet. So how else were they going to be the center of attention for Norway? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There's no PA system. There's no music piped in.

There's nothing. So what were you going to do? All right. Meg, you want to pick one off your pile of potential picks here? Sure. So I would like to pick one thing I love about baseball is that it affords a bunch of predominantly straight dudes a chance to be. They just love each other, like in a physically affectionate kind of way. You know, they hug each other. They slap each other on the butt. Sometimes they give each other a little kiss on the cheek.

but sometimes they give each other a little kiss on the cheek. They never kiss on the mouth, which look again, they don't have to kiss on the mouth if they don't want to. I'm just saying if they decided they wanted to kiss, like really kiss, it'd be fine. You know, we would,

they could do that instead of throwing grounders to each other. Right. The pitcher and the catcher could warm up and then there could be a different kind of back and forth, you know? So they don't all get along. And sometimes you're watching a game, and you see the guys in the dugout, and you can tell, like, that guy doesn't get along. Like, that guy's not, he's not one of the guys. You know, he's a standoffish sort, or he's never sitting with that other guy.

But sometimes you see them, and you're like, they love each other. You know, they have a love and a friendship that's really nice. Sometimes, you know, they like whisper to each other. Like dudes telling little secrets. You know, they're doing little goss. So I just like that. I like that sometimes they want to dance together. Well, you know, well, you're all dudes, right?

Do you ever go dancing with your guys? You know, do you ever go out dancing? I feel like that's the thing that like some men do, but I think more men should go dancing with each other. And sometimes these guys, they do, they dance together. It's in the context of winning and in the outfield, they do a little circle or whatever, but like they dance together. They're dancing together.

So I just, I like dudes being br bros you know so i like baseball so you drafted camaraderie yeah winter meetings jeff you and i cut a rug i had a great time my quadras no story yeah i um i think this is the same topic so so i so I hope I'm not, um, taking it in a different direction, but you know, when, uh, players get to the base, the other team comes over and goes like, Hey, how you doing? Right. And that's really, I, that's kind of a nice charming thing. And, um, so I watch Mike Trout a lot when I, when I go to an angels game, I just watch what Mike Trout's up to. And I noticed that like he gets to a base and the other team comes over and says, Hey, how you doing? And they, they, you know,

have a laugh or whatever. And Mike Trout's like the best player in the world, right? Like, or, you know, more or less one of them certainly. And he is the, the, the hero of the generation. And you would think if there was like a normal hierarchical social structure that like you and all of us are used to in life, that maybe Joey Votto could instigate conversation with Mike Trout or like someone who is roughly at his level or maybe is also very good and has more service time or I don't know, maybe was a former teammate and also is pretty good, that those players could instigate Mike Trout conversation. But in fact, every single player does. No matter who is on the base that he is arriving to, the person comes over and says hi

to him. So what made me really notice this was when he got to second base a couple weeks ago and Michael Chavis walked over. And Michael Chavis is younger. He's got negative career war. He was on an also-ran team. It was in Trout's home ballpark. Everything was saying you don't maybe have the right to go over to the best baseball player in the world and say, hey, how you doing? But he did.

And not only did he do that, he put his hand on Trout's shoulder. He touched the man. Like, that to me was really striking just to see how open the social networks are. Just like anything goes. There's like a leveling effect on the field. Yeah, all the hierarchy breaks down. We're all big leaguers. Yeah, it's radical.

It reminds me of how I'm on this podcast with you. Despite never actually being a host of Effective Wealth. Not for lack of trying at times. Anyway. Wow, Ben, jeez. Zing. not for lack of trying at times anyway so i guess i'll go now yeah it's my turn right now that we're all stunned into silence what you just did to grant spilling the tea oh that was a compliment right we've we've we've had discussions with grant about being a co-host at times, right? If a compliment is in the eye of the beholder, this was not beheld as a compliment.

That's like saying a presidential primary is a compliment. It wasn't like he auditioned and we said, eh, nah, not quite. It was, you know, logistical stuff. But didn't he basically? I'm the Walter Mondale of Effectively Wild. I get it. I took Minnesota, though. You'll never he basically? I'm the Walter Mondale of Effectively Wild. I get it. I took Minnesota, though. You'll never forget that.

I took Minnesota. I don't think Ben should get a pick. I think Ben should lose his pick. Forfeit. For antisocial behavior. I'm trying to be nice. I was trying to include him. I'm giving Ben's pick to Grant.

I yield my time to Ben. Oh, see? How generous. Stick with Billyy preston not walter mondale i will say to meg's point though uh you should not google alberto caspo eric ibar and hot dog like that is definitely not uh the kind of affection that we're talking about here did they did they they each start eating eating from one end of the hot dog and then in the middle, they ended up kissing kind of like in Lady and the Tramp? Not even close. I wouldn't know because I'm not even going to Google it. I wouldn't even know

what I'm talking about. Wasn't there a particularly affectionate hug on the Blue Jays recently, Meg? It was like Dalton Varshow and Whit Merrifield, maybe there was like an extended long hug with eye contact. It was tender. It was very tense. It was, I don't, I don't remember who was involved. I just remember the tenderness where I was like, we're close to kissing. It felt like, and again, I just feel like it's important. I'm not saying they have to kiss. Okay. I want everyone to understand my, and like, remember my like saying yes and having a good time stance.

That's my stance on this stuff. But I'm just saying if they, sometimes they look like they really want to kiss and I want them to, to feel like they could kiss if they wanted to kiss. But only if they want to. Where's the line, Meg? How far is fine? How far is what?

Cameras are on. How far is okay? Cameras are on. They're celebrating. How far? Just like, you know, like, it could, there's room for more tenderness. Put it that way. Okay.

How tender is too tender? Well, I mean, like, you know, like Sam said, they could stay in the dugout. Who would know what's going on in there? Third result for Eric Ibar hot dog in Google is a chat with Sam Miller on Baseball Perspectives. Just getting that out there. Okay. Well, if baseball players were to smooch, I assume that at some point they would hurt themselves doing so,

because that is my pick preposterous player injuries. I can't believe none of us has ever taken this. Maybe it was too obvious, but this is just, it's one of the great things about baseball. Just all of the silly injuries that have occurred over the years, some of which are perhaps semi-apocryphal or have been burnished a bit over time or exaggerated. kind of preposterous player injury. Not like the ones where they just hurt themselves in a way that, you know, like skin is broken because they poke themselves with a sharp implement of some sort, which happens. I mean, you know, there's like the Adam Eaton stabbing himself as he was trying to open a DVD wrapper with a knife or Spencer Torkelson hurting him, slicing his finger because he was trying to open a can of beans with a wine opener.

You know, like there are a lot in that genre. Or who is the guy with the air conditioner? Someone or there's like Roger Craig supposedly cutting himself on his wife's bra, which he denied. What did she deserve? I don't know. How does that even get out if it doesn't come from Roger Craig or his wife? Was there someone else watching that happen? Anyway.

I'm sorry. A wine corkscrew to open a can of beans? Yeah, I think he didn't have a can. Was he draining the can of beans? It was like in spring training and he didn't have a can opener, I think, and he was just using whatever. But it only pokes tiny holes. That's a great question. That's a good point.

Did it like ricochet of this? Is he straining the beans? You can't get the beans out. Yeah. Maybe they were very small beans. Individual beans? He just wants that sweet, sweet nectar. Yeah, he was using it as a colander

kind of. Just a bean by a bean? Should have been a sign of broader approach problems. Mark Smith, I was trying to think. Mark Smith hurt himself sticking his hand into an air conditioner to see why it wasn't working, and then shortly, he wasn't working. But that kind of injury

is like, it's silly and it's funny, but it's not that surprising, really, because baseball players are mortal. Like, they don't have impenetrable skin. You know, like if you prick them, do they not bleed? They do. They bleed. Like anyone, if we stabbed ourselves, who has not cut themselves on something at some point right so why would that not happen to baseball players especially like young men who do stupid stuff like trying to open a can of beans with a wine screw i mean there's two male instincts and one of the like the the classic is like oh this isn't working so i'm

gonna kick it or like hit it right but the other one is i don't know what's in here i'm gonna put my hand in it like yeah no especially like if you're an athlete and you have to use your hands for things, then maybe exercise caution. I do always marvel at players continuing periodically to punch things. Punch stuff. Sometimes with like their primary pitching hand. Yeah. hand. And somehow they don't. And I've advocated just having padded walls everywhere in the vicinity of the dugout or the clubhouse or the tunnel, just because it's inevitably going to happen at some point. But really, I'm talking about the kind of injury where a baseball player

gets hurt doing something that you didn't know could cause harm, not only to a professional athlete, but to anyone. I guess a go-to example would be hurting yourself sneezing, right? Which like a surprisingly high number of players seem to have hurt themselves sneezing. I guess most famously Sammy Sosa, right? Like wrenched his back sneezing and like, I've never hurt myself sneezing that I can recall. You're in your thirties. How have you not hurt yourself sneezing. And like, I've never hurt myself sneezing that I can recall. You're in your thirties. How have you not hurt yourself sneezing? You don't seem like one who sneezes. I mute myself when I sneeze on the podcast. So perhaps that's produced the impression that I

never sneeze. There's a, there's a wide range of sneeze exertions in the you know in the species like you you're just some people are born big sneezers and some people are born i would i would also posit that like baseball players probably select for people who want to be like louder deliberately with their sneezes right they're like trying to be more manly about it whatever and so i would think that that only makes sense that there would be a higher incidence of sneeze related muscle strains and sprains oh i think though that i think the injury comes when you try to stifle when you're a big sneezer and you're trying to stifle it when you're trying to restrict it in some way when you're a temperamentally a big sneezer but in the moment you become a you attempt

to be not true to your sneeze nature can i just just say that, by the way, every so often I remember, I think I remember Jeff Sullivan one time tweeting that he had been under the impression that it was illegal to sneeze while driving. And I don't know if I dreamed that. I don't know if I, I feel like every few years I remember it and then find it. And then a few years pass and I have to find it again. And recently I went looking for it and it and then find it. And then a few years pass and I have to find it again. And recently I went looking for it and I couldn't find it. Jeff, did you at one point in your life think that it was illegal to sneeze while driving? I did.

And I can add to the list too, because it should also be illegal to drive west in the 30 minutes before sunset. Yeah. Similarly, driving east 30 minutes after sunrise should not be allowed. Right. Speaking of dreaming, there's the silly baseball player injury involving glenn allen hill dreaming about spiders and then hurting himself stumbling over a glass table or whatever it was and of course there's the classic like people hurting

themselves ironing themselves which you know john smoltz continues to strenuously deny ever happened some of these i just wonder, I guess someone started the rumor because you know the player is not going to volunteer this information. Oh, no. You would tell people in your own life that you might not tell a reporter, but you would definitely tell people in your life things that you wouldn't offer to a reporter. And then the people who you've told have no reservations about telling a reporter.

I think a lot of it depends on your baseline level of being charming. Because if you're a charming person who people like and you're like, and then this one time I ironed myself, people would be like, oh, charming guy. Of course you did. But if you're not charming, like maybe your name is John Smoltz, you wouldn't want to tell that story because people will be like, I believe that happened to you in a non-charming kind of way. Self-deprecation is one of the most charming qualities. Right.

And not everyone knows that, I think. Yeah. Greg Harris supposedly hurt himself flicking a sunflower seed and strained his elbow. Again, some of these, it's's like did he actually strain his elbow doing that or did he strain his elbow just you know playing baseball and and that happened to coincide with that but he was flicking it what it what it like what does that mean how was he he was flicking it like oh a shell fell on me i have to flick it off of me it's just like yeah flicking and spitting like i guess maybe it maybe it him. Maybe he spit it out and it, I don't know.

Flicking and spitting and holding. One specific injury really prompted this, and it's my number one of all of these. And it happened in 2005, so I've been thinking for weeks or months that I would mention it on the podcast when we got to the pass blast for episode 2005, but I can't wait anymore. And it's the Clint Barmas venison injury. I don't know whether you all remember this mishap, but 2005, and the best part is not the end. It's not the scandal. It's the coverup, right? I mean, it's not the incident, but it's how he attempted to pass it off as something else. So it came out that Clint Barmas got a hunk of deer meat from his teammate, Todd Helton. But initially he said it was a bag of groceries because he fell

when going upstairs carrying the venison and he broke his collarbone. And he was like a leading rookie of the year candidate at the time. And so this was sort of a big deal. And so initially he said that he was carrying a bag of groceries and then eventually it came out. He came clean. I don't know why. I don't know what prompted him to like whether reporters were digging and getting too close to the truth. And he thought, I better just come out. But I love what he said to the Denver Post. I just didn't think it was right to bring Todd Helton into something like this. He said, which makes it sound like something sordid.

I didn't want to tarnish Todd Helton's good name by connecting him to my venison mishap. Todd Helton's good name by connecting him to my venison mishap. I guess he just didn't want fans to blame Todd Helton for giving the rookie deer meat and causing him to get hurt. Would anyone blame Todd Helton for that? I don't know. He was carrying it upstairs? Did he illegally hunt the deer? Who keeps a freezer or refrigerator upstairs? Yeah.

I don't know, but he had to have surgery to repair the collarboat. He had a titanium plate and nine screws. And then there was more to the story because Helton said that he and Clint Barmas had been riding ATVs at Helton's ranch. Now, here's the thing. Helton said the ATV ride had nothing to do with the injury. He said, I cannot say it strongly enough. He did not get hurt said the ATV ride had nothing to do with the injury. He said, I cannot say it strongly enough. He did not get hurt riding an ATV. So he definitely got hurt riding an ATV. I was there. He never left my eyesight the entire time. Except for when he went into the ditch on

the ATV. And again, like, why say this? Do you have a guilty conscience? Did someone, was someone sniffing around and heard that they actually were riding ATVs and it was going to blow up? And he's like, I guess we better get ahead of this. We better fess up to the ATVs. Because as soon as you volunteer that you were, you just happened to be riding ATVs that day, then who's going to believe the venison story? So why? This is the not involved in human

trafficking? Yes, exactly. And then the next line of this AP story, Helton said he, Farmus and rookie teammate Brad Hopp were riding about five miles per hour. Who has ever ridden an ATV? That's like a brisk walkisk walk like why would you get on an atv and ride it five miles per hour so again no one is buying this this is like this is like the jeff kent you know i was washing my car excuse right they're like wearing fezzes and like the shriners following each other around so the story goes they all got together to ride ATVs five miles per hour together. Just joyride ATVs five miles per hour. And then afterward, Todd Helton treated his younger teammates to a dinner that included

deer meat, just a veteran move, you know. And Barmas liked the venison so much that Helton just gave him a package. He happened to have some venison lying around. I guess that's not so surprising for a baseball player in the offseason. That's the least surprising part of anything you've said so far. Yeah, this wasn't even the offseason. This was like June or May or something. So I don't know.

Anyway, so he had some deer meat and he just gave some to party favor. Just here's a hunk of deer meat. And Clint Barmas was carrying it. And then he fell and he got hurt. And the AP story says nothing in Barmas' contract specifically prohibits him from riding an ATV. It does say, I guess nothing prohibited him from carrying venison either. And Rocky's general manager, Dan O'Dowd, said he doesn't doubt Barmas' explanation

that it was a fall and not the ATV ride that caused the injury. This is one of the greatest character kids we've ever had come through the organization. I have no reason to doubt him. It's an unfortunate injury for both him and for us, but he'll get through this. So you're just like testifying to his character.

It was the deer meat all along. I just, it's my favorite story. And I guess you could say that by volunteering the ATV information, it's like, why would he make that up? Or why would he say that unless it was true, unless it was one of these like truth is stranger than fiction sort of stories, because because why again why say it because as soon as you say it no one's going to believe the venison story so the the most plausible thing about it is that like he wouldn't have even mentioned that if it was the atvs he would have tried to hide that the way that he tried to turn the venison into a bag of groceries which i guess technically i mean a hunk of venison is i don't't know if it was in a bag, but it's groceries.

Do you think he had just like loose meats? I mean, I don't know. Tom Holt's just handing him deer. I mean, that would maybe explain why you fell down if you were just like sliding with a bunch of loose meats. Right. It's technically not untrue when he called it groceries, I would say. Right. Yeah.

Anyway. So that's my favorite baseball injury of all time. And really, it's about the explanation and all the circumstances surrounding it, not so much the falling on the stairs, which anyone could do, although not necessarily while holding venison. Yeah, what's special about that? Come on. Yeah.

Ben, if this had been a stat blast, what were you going to query? It was not going to be a stat blast. It was going to be a pass blast where we talk about something that happened in the year that corresponds to the episode number. So I was going to reminisce about Clint Barmas. I don't know what I could stat blast about this other than the fact that Clint Barmas was not really the same player post-Venice. I guess years later he had a decent season in there, but I'm not sure he was ever the same. post venice i guess years later he had he had a decent season in there but i'm not not sure he was ever the same oh dear you beat me to the joke i'm so mad all right i can i i think that uh at one point i uh i very very very briefly had an idea for an article which was the most aggregated baseball topic ideas

or whatever. Like, I don't know how you would put this, but I, this was based on my, uh, conclusion that nothing gets aggregated more than weird baseball injuries that like, if you want to live forever, um, you know, like, uh, I don't know, swallow a dime and have to miss a weekend series. Yes. Yep. Yeah. Right. I mean, you think Joe Z't know, swallow a dime and have to miss a weekend series. Yes. Yep. Yeah. Right.

I mean, you think Joel Zumaia, what do you think? Guitar hero. Guitar hero. Right. I mean, even if you were a pretty good player for a while, you're forever associated with the weird injury that you had. All right. Jeff, do you want to just draft the pitch clock again or do you have any others? No. I mean, no, I'm going to draft Rob Manfred, because he's the commissioner who's presided over the game

while they've implemented the pitch clock. So I think next up. Vultured. Vultured Rob Manfred from I Was Going to Take Him Next. Okay. Great pick. Great pick. Okay.

Grant? Let's see. Okay. Great pick. Great pick. Okay. Grant? like a poll or fan voting that is just outstanding because you will get uh the eventual winner yeah but then you will get very bad suggestions uh the when the mets bode mcboat for baseball right they they opened up uh like for a fan poll and in the new york dinosaurs it's like all right that's not very good but then someone said the nibs, the N Y B S and that stood for New York boroughs, the nibs. Okay. And then there was the BCBs, the New York BCBs. Someone from Ohio submitted that it stood for big city boys. That is precious. The big city boys. Well, no, the BCBs. That's a great everything. That's a great name for an anything. Aw.

The best one that they didn't use was the New York boroughs, as in the animal, but it's a play on words. Right. That actually rules. That actually, that rules. One of my favorites is that the Marlins was a fan who chose that. And okay, Marlins, not a bad one, not a bad one. But she submitted 39 other names. She spammed the contest.

And she also submitted the Beachers, the Magnets, the Maniacs, the Mackerels, the Florida Muscle. And my favorite is the Miami Renegades. That's pretty good. Like Everglades, but Renegades instead. It's like Everglades and Renegades, so it's the Renegades. No, that's because the Miami Renegades were the name of their inland hockey team that played on ESPN2 in the mid-90s. Jeff, are you enjoying hockey?

Not anymore. No, my team's not in the playoffs again. Yeah, so I get to turn it off. I hope the Leafs lose, though. Go Tampa. Tampa. I root for Tampa now. More disrespecting Grant in this podcast.

Sorry. He's mid-pick. We're changing sports. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. The Toronto Metronomes. G-N-O-M-E-S. So like city gnomes?

But the Metro-Gnomes was an actual suggestion. The Toronto Fiddlefaddles. The Toronto Satsaks. Yeah, lots going on. I do not take offense. Actually, I didn't take offense to Ben's thing. I didn't take offense to Meg's thing. Like you guys are trying to start a fight. I'm okay. These are my, these are my baseball friends.

It might be that you're conditioned to being walked upon. I'm sorry. No, I was, listen, I was like 12 years old when I started high school and I was about four foot one with bottle cap glasses. Like nothing can hurt me. I was, I've been, Oh God, I'm a big city boy. How can you be? Big city boys.

I mean, you want a team that kisses. I bet the big city boys would kiss. Sleeveless jerseys and shit. They'd be like all, they'd be so tendy with each other. Oh, that's lovely. I'm just taking this from an article I actually wrote. So I'm plagiarizing myself, but I do want to point out that one of the suggestions for the Seattle Mariners,

a freelance art company submitted a package with sketches for the team name. The team name was the Seattle Strokers. And one of the sketches included a flasher. Honest hand to hand, you know, like a man dressed only in a raincoat. That was like the logo they submitted. That actual submission. Closed raincoat certainly hope so but they didn't put that in the AP

article it's like you're seeing him from behind and he's like looking over his shoulder like I'm in trouble do flashers stroke yeah some do. Oh, man. Sounds like you're from experience. Not of being one, but of witnessing one.

No, no, no. Anyway, this restored my faith in weird team names that has been robbed by the lab-grown minor league team names, the intentionally quirky ones that are like yeah those are the worst you know especially because like people who don't know that there's just like a antiseptic scientific let's coin the weirdest sounding name that we could come up with it works on them and they're like oh the the trash pandas oh that's so cute but it's so standardized it's there's no there's no spontaneity whatsoever in it it is designed and calculated to elicit that reaction i will say that i have a flying squirrels hat and i also uh just got a eugene exploding

whales hat um and i'm very proud of it so yeah that one. Yeah. I mean, at least it fits. There's a reason for that one. At least. Yeah. I feel like we're reliving the over the top ballpark food craze of like 2013. Yeah. Yep. All right, Sam.

I'm going to take error cards and specifically the Dale Murphy reverse negative in 1989's Upper Deck set, which is basically this Dale Murphy card. It's a plain card of Dale Murphy staring at the camera with his bat over his right shoulder. And that card was worth like 12 cents. But then due to production error, some of the cards had the bat over his left shoulder. And so it was worth $150. And I mean, growing up as a kid, baseball card collecting was kind of how I learned capitalism and how I learned about economic forces.

And I feel like the error card was really how I learned about like just how arbitrary and absurd money is as a concept. Because these are completely worthless cards. And then you just break them slightly and they become like desirable. Because there was a Pat Sheridan card. Nothing ruined your day more than getting a Pat Sheridan card in a pack of baseball cards. But there were some of them, the position where it says outfield kind of got cut off a little. So that card was worth $7. It was the fourth most valuable card you could get in 1989. Like you could go to a card shop and buy every pack of every card that they sold. And the most valuable card you could get was the Griffey upper deck. And the second most valuable card was the Dale Murphy reverse negative. And the third most valuable was I think the John Smoltz rookie card. And the fourth most valuable was Pat Sheridan with a

smudge. And like, we just accepted that. Like we lived that lifestyle, like looking at cards and going, is that an error? Is it more importantly, is it an error they corrected? And it's nuts. It was really absurd. I did not rebel at that time, but I think as the years passed, this kind of resistance was always in me. And so I'm grateful for the Dale Murphy reverse negative for teaching me lessons about how, like basically the rules are just sent down from above. They don't make sense and you have to play along and that's, that's what the economy is. Yeah. I will just get ahead of the story before it comes out in, in, uher uh but i might have in 1989 the upper deck you could actually erase on the upper deck cards you could erase the names of the players and and whatever text was on there with just any old pencil eraser you could just erase it and it took it right off and i might

have i might have traded some cards that i fraudulently presented as error cards for better cards uh and then i was maybe perhaps uh forced to give them back once the parents convened and my fraud was discovered wow uh yeah i would like to say uh i'm sorry to to henry um about well the crazy you know the crazy thing is that like there's nothing valuable about the actual error cards except that they're slightly rarer and by that logic a card that has been defaced by grant brisby that's a one of a kind like there's only one in the whole world that's what i'm saying right, you know, if you could get that in Beckett Baseball Monthly's ear, like that could be a subset. Like the Grant Brisbane graffiti cards could be like an ultra rare subset.

You get like one every 7,000 packs. They'd be super valuable. I remember about, gosh, am I going to get this story right? I think I am. There was a Pete Rose card that was quite valuable early in the junk wax era. People started counterfeiting these cards and they got arrested for counterfeiting the cards and they went to jail. And then the counterfeit cards became more valuable than the real ones once they became exposed because they were even rarer. So, I mean, it makes as much sense as anything. I mean, nothing that I just described about Pat Sheridan and Dale Murphy makes any sense at all. And so why not the Grant Brisby eraser special? Sure. Yeah, I'd love one of those. I would pay a premium today for a card that Grant Brisby had ruined.

Yeah, I could send you one. Just writing out a bunch of spoonerisms. I can't believe you volunteered that. That was like Clint Barmas confessing to writing an ATV and not having regular groceries. That wasn't going to come out if you hadn't brought it up here. I wonder what the statute of limitations on that is. But I wish I could make my products more valuable by making mistakes, just inserting typos or leaving something in the podcast that was supposed to be edited out and suddenly it would be more worthwhile and collectible. One of my favorite baseball cards that I have, and I have a very select binder of baseball cards that I actually like and still rummage through at some point. And one of them, I got it as a kid. It's a Maury Wills when he's on the Expos. But some kid in the past scratched out Expos and wrote Dodgers.

And I love it. I love it because it's just like this kid was having none of it. Like, no. No. Not on the Expos. expos dodgers no less convincing than when they used to do the the airbrushing and grant this is some kit like this this card traveled uh you know through several hands before it ended up in years like you don't know the kid who did this you weren't there when it happened this This card is like a form of telepathy.

This kid managed to send his thoughts to you. Absolutely. I love it. I love it. I have a picture of it on the internet. I'll put it out there for the wiki. Has it been confirmed that baseball card companies ever intentionally inserted error cards? Like just to boost the

value, to make something more clear? Because that was a rumor, right? It was definitely the, yeah, it's talked about a lot. I don't know if it was ever confirmed. We need a whistleblower to come out. Who would regulate that? I talked to some people when I wrote an article about the Bill Ripken card, and I talked to some people who worked in the industry, like, come on, you really do not see that. Come on, come on. And they said, no, you know what? It's plausible. It's plausible that that organically got through. We're busy people, blah, blah, blah. Um, I, I

still don't buy it. I still don't buy it. I would buy it if the, I mean, I would buy a Billy Ripken. I mean, I would buy a Billy Ripken. Yeah. All right. Meg. Oh, God. It's my turn again. Wow.

I like pesky teams. I like pesky teams or frisky teams. I would, like, this year's Diamondbacks, they're a pesky team, a frisky team. I have a cat being loud on my desk. I'm sorry. You're, like, in a weird position, and whose fault is team. I have a cat being loud on my desk. I'm sorry. You're like in a weird position. And whose fault is that but yours, Babs?

It's your fault, not mine. Why are you looking at me like that? Pesky cat. Pesky cat. No, but that's a different kind of pesky. That's like a, hey, I'm trying to record a podcast. Stop it, pesky. And the D-backs are like,

we're probably not going to win the NL West. That would be wild. But we're going to be a problem for people while we do. And especially if you've had the opportunity to like watch the now pesky team when they were embarrassingly bad. And now all of a sudden like they're, you know, they're kind of on the come up. They're exciting. They're pesky. You know, they're frisky. They're, they're in it. Particularly after they get rid of Madison Bumgarner, like that's really exciting.

I think my cat's about to, like, throw up on the floor, you guys. She's making throw up on the floor sounds. You okay? Leave it all in, Shane. Don't be like Grant the one time when he did an entire podcast with a poop behind him from his dog because he didn't want to pause to clean the poop up. So if your cat does love it, we can pause the podcast. Yeah. I don't know.

She's looking. Show must go on. It's looking kind of dicey. She has like a young person in college. I'm either going to be fine or I'm going to throw up all over the place. Look on her face. Anyway, frisky teams. Not like my potentially ill cat.

I think she should say grass. It's fine, you guys. The cat's fine. No cats were harmed in the making of this podcast. Okay. Oh, Babs, what are you doing? I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

But yeah, because, you know, there will come a time. There will come a time when the frisky team becomes like a legitimately good team and you will look back and you'll be like i remember when it started to turn around when i knew like i don't know they kind of got something here and that's really fun when it happens i definitely have to mute and like attend okay well while you do that, I will go, I guess. Wait, wait, wait. Hang on, hang on. Grant has sent you, Ben, the Maury Wills card. And I just want to note that not only did this person cross out Expos and write Dodgers,

but wrote Dodgers in a totally different part of the card, so also redesigned the Tops card that year. He said, I do not like the team this player plays on, and I also do not like the layout, the graphic design that Tops used in 1974 or whatever. I'm fixing it all today. Okay. I will take baseball broadcast directors, who I think are wizards and are largely unsung and uncredited. And every now

and then I will be exposed to the work that goes into a baseball broadcast and my mind will be blown. And this just happened this week because, as some of you probably know, the SNY broadcast is not only great because of Gary and Keith and Ron, but also because this guy, John DeMarcico, is the director of the SNY Mets broadcast. And he's like a film buff. He studied film like he has his letterbox in his Twitter bio. He's like trying to channel Scorsese and De Palma in the Mets broadcast. So he's like bringing all of this visual inventiveness to these games that almost no one else is doing, right?

So they were the ones who followed Edwin Diaz in with the Timmy Trumpet and the Narco last year, right? And then they've also done things like when the pitch clock came in, they did like a superimposed like 24 kind of thing where they showed the pitch clock in the middle of the screen as Max Scherzer and Trent Grisham maybe were like facing off.

And you could see both of them facing off as the clock was counting down and it was very intense. And then they did like a, like a kill bill filter on Buck Showalter last year when the Mets get got hit by pitches and, and Buck Showalter would look angry about it. They do like the Tarantino kill Billfield. So they're always experimenting. And they did this thing this week that DeMarcico

called the ghost runner. And even though it makes me very upset when people call the zombie runner the ghost runner, I will allow this even though there was a physical runner, because what they did is they superimposed a ghostly image of the runner circling the bases. Francisco Lindor had a hit and Brandon Nimmo scored from first. And so as they showed the hit going out into the outfield, they also showed like on the left side of the screen, Brandon Nimmo running like this ghostly superimposed Brandon Nimmo so that you could actually see where he was on the bases because usually you can't even tell where the runner is, right?

And it was, I've never seen that before on a baseball broadcast and it was new and interesting. And also it was useful and valuable because I actually got information about the baseball game that I wouldn't have otherwise until you get that final shot where you see, oh, okay, he's going to be out by a mile or he's easily safe. You could actually see that shaping up

and it added so much to the suspense. But there was a video that DeMarcico tweeted like behind the scenes from the control room as this was being planned. Like they had this holstered, obviously. And you could see from his view, they have like eight different camera angles at least on there.

And you can hear his voice being like cut to two cut to three cut like every time the camera changes two goodbye nope ready ghost runner ghost runner lose it three four take four. 34, take one. 8. 36, take six. Wide first.

8. Actually passed the hit on 8, Jared. 37, take seven. 36. Take six. Ready, wide bread. Swing. And wide bread.

Nice throw. That looked that well. It's amazing because usually I watch a baseball broadcast And white bread. It's amazing because usually I watch a baseball broadcast and I don't like I don't really think about the fact that someone is actually orchestrating that just like a movie director does. And SNY does it in this very cinematic way. But like someone has to call out every single cut. There are so many cuts. I don't know, like if you could count them, I don't know how many there would be in the course of a single game,

but this guy has to be totally plugged in and in the zone and being like, go to this camera, go to this camera, like all those routine angles that I totally take for granted and don't even think about someone actually making a conscious decision to do that. Someone is sitting there just saying like, go to this camera, go to that camera. And that's incredible. It's like conducting an orchestra or something. The fact that someone is doing that. So every time I get a little glimpse and they pull the curtain back, it just amazes me because I never think that that is happening in the background. And if they screw up for five seconds, it ruins the whole experience. And that's all we remember. Yeah. I, uh uh i heard about the ghost

runner and then i heard you describe it and i still couldn't envision it and then i just watched it and now i get it and yeah what's great about it is that i mean baseball has the problem with filming baseball is that there's so many cuts you know like a football a football play hike and then play happens and then it's over, and there's no cut. And so you get to see the whole run or the whole pass or the whole sack. You get to see the whole thing uninterrupted by cuts. But every baseball player's got these super awkward cuts where they go from center field to then high dugout camera or whatever. There's like three or four different

cuts a lot of times especially if there's a double then there might be like six or seven because you're cutting back and forth to the runner and they are not elegant and they do take you they actually don't place you in the action very well at all they uh they can disorient you and so any time a production can figure out a way to have one uninterrupted shot of a thing happening, either like a home run where they track the home run or a throw, you know, a throw from the outfield or whatever, it works really well. And this, I think you're right. It really does work very well. No cut. Yeah.

You'd think like by this point, they just would have figured out everything when it comes to baseball broadcasts like i i know they're just more and more cameras and angles every year and and they do that sometimes they don't show like the standard from center field angle they'll show like a shot from like behind the right fielder or something just you know trying to to mess with your expectations a little and show you a different angle and it's it's just really creative but also it's just like so just the sweat that goes into planning all of that. And they rarely miss in a very obvious and embarrassing way. You know, like rarely is there like a play at the plate and suddenly you're like watching the left fielder or something, you know, like that never really happens. You know,

I mean, occasionally a camera person will, you know, have the wrong angle and will like pan up and make you think that a ball is gone and then it's not right. Like the Mike Piazza, but, but not often. And rarely are they like totally in the wrong place at the wrong time. So I'm just, I'm very impressed with everything they do. Hey, I, uh, I'm running out of time. Okay. Do you want to, do you want to do your, your last pick then? Uh, do I have to have a last pick? with everything they do. Hey, I'm running out of time. Okay. Just for the record.

You want to do your last pick then? Do I have to have a last pick? What if I only had two picks? Then would people still like me? Yeah. They'd feel cheated of their Stan Miller. I'll say my last pick is that I recently learned that it used to be that when an umpire couldn't work the game because either the umpire got sick or the umpire passed out from heat exhaustion or the

umpires plural didn't show up to the game because of transportation issues, the players would simply do the umpiring, uh, themselves. Uh, and that, I mean, you're, you're thinking, oh man, 1887 sure was weird. But no, this happened like up to kind of World War II-ish, a lot less common in the 20th century, but it did happen. I had Dan Hirsch pull all the player umpire, oh, I get what, I don't know what you'd call them, players who umped.

Yeah, I don't know why you wouldn't call them that. That's actually a very clear sequence of words. And there are basically like, you know, in the 20th century, maybe like 100 players who did this. And the most famous of these situations was Jocko Conlon, who was a player, a major league player, who made his debut at age 34 and was just kind of hanging on as a pinch hitter and pinch runner in his second season. And the umpire, it was 114 degrees. The umpire collapsed or something like that.

And so they said, we need someone. And he said, can I do it? And they said, sure. And he's like, I liked that. And he almost immediately after retired from playing baseball, became an umpire and made the hall of fame as an umpire. He's like maybe one of the, I don't know, three most famous umpires in history. And he, I think for some reason, maybe I was reading his Wikipedia page. And that is how I learned about this custom of letting the teams choose an umpire to replace the ump. And what I'm actually getting to here is that according to this Wikipedia description, the custom of the time was to pick an umpire from the players who was seen as trustworthy, who was seen as a trustworthy person.

And I just think that like MVP award, Cy Young award, chosen by the other team to ump. Those are like, to me, comparable accomplishments in one's career and life. Like what a great tribute that the other team's like, we trust him. He can ump. So this list that I have that Dan Hirsch sent me of 100 names, I look at it and I really kind of admire these old dead people. Every once in a while in the last couple of weeks, I've just picked one of these names at random and gone and read their page, their Saber bio. And like almost without fail, there's one, that I found that it was just sort of a normal average kind of jerk,

but mostly they're mostly, these are the, like the, by the saber bios really point out like, so you remember our friend, uh, Freddie Fitzsimmons then? Oh yeah.

Freddie Fitzsimmons was, uh, lunch when, when next, when next we're being, was it, was that? Or did that come up in the same episode? I think you're right. Yeah, I think you're right. Out to lunch when necks were being handed out. That's right. So, Freddie Fitzsimmons was chosen to be an umpire one day. And here's his Sabre bio. Approachable and outgoing, Fitzsimmons avoided the nightlife New York City offered and neither drank nor smoked cigarettes. He was seen constantly with his wife, Helen, whom he met while playing in Indianapolis. Described by the Sporting News as the most devoted couple in the majors. The Fitzsimmons

had one child, also named Helen. During the off-season, they lived on a farm in Arcadia, where they raised chickens in prosaic surroundings. Later, they moved to Yucca Valley, north of Palm Springs. Quote, there isn't a finer character in baseball, wrote nationally syndicated columnist Dan Daniel, offering perhaps the greatest compliment to Fitzsimmons. And there isn't a more straightforward hombre, pitching, catching, batting, or doing anything

in this grand game of ours. And like every one of these names I look up, the bio has got like some paragraph of Dan Daniel being like every one of these names I look up, the bio has got like some paragraph of Dan Daniel being like, I never met a nicer man. Like, honestly, I know I said a couple of years ago about Freddie Fitzsimmons, but like, uh, you know, player and even better person, but like, I really got to tell you cliff Blankenship, even better. Like they just like all these guys turn out to be really nice guys. It seems like. So I like that. And then the last thing that I like about this is that these players are deemed to be

trustworthy enough to ump, right? But I have noticed, I've looked up a ton of these box scores. These were two ump crews and one ump is unavailable and they replace with a player. But they, in almost every case, replace with two players. So trustworthy, but only up to a point. Like they hedge, these teams hedge. They said, one of yours, one of ours. Yeah, I like the thing they did in spring training this year

when they played the bottom of the ninth and the umpires left and they just had the catcher call the pitchers, which was kind of like your idea for not having a strike zone or or just having players decide what the strike zone is or whatever what that's not my idea that is the opposite of my idea what was that what was it it was umpire still have an umpire it's just instead of a defined strike zone because they don't stick to it anyway by design although more and more. The idea is becoming slightly outdated. But instead of a defined strike zone, the umpire simply rules whether it was a fair pitch, whether it's a fair pitch. that Jeff is going to draft Bud Selig for designating Rob Manfred as his successor so

that he could then create the pitch clock. Am I right? Is Jeff still here? Yeah, I'm watching our game because this has been going for a while, but as a completely unrelated fun fact, the White Sox manager was just ejected in the first inning and yesterday he was ejected in the eighth inning. So that's two ejections within three innings for a team's manager. I haven't seen that one before. Beautiful. I was going to draft watching was ejected in the eighth inning so that's two ejections within three innings for a team's manager haven't seen that one before beautiful uh i was gonna draft to watching pedro baez in the playoffs because i think that was the straw that broke the camel's back and allowed for the implementation of the pitch clock into major league baseball yeah yeah what what about my article jeff what about my contributions to the pitch clock yeah Yeah, I know. Walking by us was miserable. And I remember making a gif of

John Lackey just kind of like making faces for like two and a half minutes. I think he threw one pitch in the middle of it for a while in the playoffs. And that's the stuff that I will only now see in the World Baseball Classic. I'm drafting Grant's article that just directed the course of the conversation

and established without any doubt that it was the time between pitches that was causing games to be longer. Thank you, Grant, for giving us the pitch clock. Damn skippy. I like watching baseball in ballparks that are mostly empty of spectators. So that's one that I was going to pick. I like it when fans misjudge home runs and they aren't home runs, actually, which is sort of a variation on a theme. So it's good to do it as a lightning round pick because it's like half a pick really um i like how baseball keeps trying to be like cool and it's always failing at being cool but then sometimes

it'll it'll like be cool on accident and it's just like it's like a middle schooler it's like relax and just like live your life and then the cool will find you or not but like if you keep trying it's gonna go badly for you so baseball is poochy yeah yeah exactly it's like city connects the trident like all the home run celebrations i think i think we're trying too hard just like relax let your shoulders drop it's it's fine you know um so i i like i like that and again i, I would like the kissing if there were kissing, but there is no kissing. But not just to try to be cool. Right. Yeah.

Like, again, it needs to be organic. Because you genuinely want to. Yeah. Sam, do the home run celebrations fit into the genre of baseball players trying to be funny? Or do you not see it as an attempt to be funny? Just an attempt to build team spirit or celebrate did sam leave i still see uh i still all right well i think he i think he muted himself so that he could just bounce he was polite you know he just he let us keep talking and he just sidled out that was that's a very sam exit i think that was quintessentially sam that that was the way he went

out all right so uh grant did you have any last one that you wanted to say uh yeah i'll just do a quick one about how much ted williams loved his bats like he loved his bats he didn't have roommates on the road he would just sit with his bats and that doesn't have roommates on the road. He would just sit with his bats. And that's not even a joke. He would just be in his hotel room honing his bats with a bone, just getting the wood the way he liked it. When he would wipe away the dust and rosin, he would weigh his bats on his own scale.

This is like I'm reading this straight from a book excerpt about Mickey Mantle and Ted Williams. For every game, he would stand in front of a large hotel mirror, usually wearing only an undershirt and his underwear, swinging a bat. Quote, he wanted to see how he looked with the bat in his hands because he had to look good. My name is Ted F. Williams. I'm the greatest hitter in baseball, he would declare through clenched teeth.

He'd swing the bat and repeat his mantra. My name is Ted F. Williams, and I'm the greatest hitter in baseball, he would declare through clenched teeth. He'd swing the bat and repeat his mantra. My name is Ted F. Williams, and I'm the greatest hitter in baseball. In a mirror, in his underwear. I love that. End quote. Well, no, the end quote came before I love that. That's what I'm saying. As Grant, I love that.

But yeah, no, he was just a true, true nut. And I really appreciate that. Wow. That was very erotic. He definitely couldn't have a roommate for any of that. Yeah. He needed privacy. Yeah, no.

They needed some alone time, clearly. Yeah. Yeah. And he didn't say effing. He said the whole thing. He said the whole thing? Wow. Yeah.

I guess that's Ichiro-esque. I don't know whether Ichiro was as physically affectionate with the bats, but he had his whole science of storage and the humidity and just getting it down to the ounce and the subset of an ounce. So, yeah, players and bats. Some of them lick their bats and kiss their bats, and they may not kiss other players in public, but they're not afraid of PDA with their bats.

Again, only if they want to. This is not pressure. I will say that, like that kissing a bat is... I would have picked, when you see players occasionally pick something out of the pine tar and put it in their mouth. Have you ever seen that? Yeah. Some players will just pick a piece of pine tar off the bat and put it in their mouth. I would have drafted that if I thought ahead.

All right. Well, my last pick was going to be, and I guess still is, Jeff King. I don't know whether you all recall Jeff King, but my last pick for why we like baseball draft is Jeff King not liking baseball, actually, or at least being perceived not to like baseball. And despite not particularly caring for baseball was a pretty successful baseball player, which I think is really interesting. Jeff King was the number one overall amateur draft pick by the Pirates in 1986. And he got 11 years in the big leagues and he hit 154 dingers and he was worth 17 war, like a pretty decent player. Maybe not all you hope for from a number one pick, but he lasted. He had a career and he had the talent to get drafted first overall in the first place.

And a lot of accounts say that he just did not enjoy baseball very much and eventually walked away, much like Sam Miller did on this podcast. Just decided that he was done with the sport. Joe Posnanski, who covered him, he wrote something some years ago for Pitchers and Poets about just reminiscing about Jeff King. And Posnanski said, best I could tell, Jeff King did not like playing baseball. I can never remember seeing a player who seemed so miserable on a baseball diamond. He said, I'm not kidding about how much he disliked the game. His manager in Kansas City, Tony Muser, used to tell a story about how he heard King moaning one day about the national anthem.

Muser, a former Marine, was shocked, but King explained every time they play this song, I have a bad day. Very dark, very sad story i also i don't know if i believe that he said that because when i searched on newspapers.com that was a story that jim leland told in 1986 about a player an unnamed player who said that to jim leland that year and then he said it again in 1987 that a player the previous year had said exactly that every time they play that song, I have a bad day. And that was before King was was drafted and was a pirate. So either Muser is conflating a couple of guys or they independently said the same thing about not liking the national anthem and having a bad day. Or maybe Jeff King, who was on the Pirates subsequently, like heard that story from Jim Lee when it was like, I like that.

I'm going to I'm going to start saying that myself. Anyway, I don't think he coined it. The first one to say it was Mark Twain, but people forget that he actually took it from Benjamin. It's a long- Often misattributed. Yeah. But Posnanski said, so King just, he walked away on May 21st, 1999. He suddenly and shockingly retired, Posnitsky put it. And he just went away to his ranch in Montana. And Posnitsky said, it didn't make a lot of sense unless you realized how much he despised playing professional baseball. He couldn't wait to get out. Later, someone told me that he had, only the day before he retired, secured enough service time

to guarantee his MLB pension. I don't know if that's true. That's a third hand that's hearsay. And also, he walked away from like $3 million. So I don't know if he just was in it for the money, then he could have stayed and collected the $3 million and not worried about the pension. But anyway, I think it's fascinating that perhaps a player might not have liked baseball and still would have made it to the pinnacle of their sport and lasted that long. And you can find throughout Jeff King's career, there were stories about him not really liking baseball that much. In 1989, here's a story. Jeff King went one for three, drove in four runs and scored another in the Buffalo Bison 6-3 victory over the Denver Zephyrs.

So Tuesday was not the worst day of his life. As of Tuesday, Jeff King had no plans to quit baseball. But today is another day. That was 1989. He didn't leave until 1999. But it's all about like he just, you know, he's not into it. And I think, though, the thing is that I don't know whether he was just misunderstood because it seems to me that he put a lot of pressure on himself and that maybe that's why he didn't enjoy it. Like in 1989, he said King has become so obsessed with meeting expectations, his expectations.

He often denies himself the joy of playing. That's my biggest struggle, having fun at the game when I'm not doing as well as I can do. It's not any fun. I probably had fun at more times this season and then like his manager terry collins says in spring training i wasn't sure he wanted to play bad enough but now i think he wants to play i think he likes to play he sounded surprised and that he said he's been impressive at the plate if we can get him to keep wanting to play he's gonna make to make it. So it was just all about, can we persuade him to keep playing this game that he is very good at?

And he was criticized by some for walking away. I found a St. Louis Post-Dispatch column in May of 99 that said he was nuts and called him crazy for walking away, even though Mike Sweeney, who was one of the players who helped replace him, said it shows he's a man. He could have continued to play the next four and a half months and taken a paycheck every two weeks and not had his heart in the game. But Jeff is a man of integrity. And for him to walk away like this proves that he's a man of integrity. And, you know, they said like at his press conference where he announced his retirement, he teared up a little bit. So even if he was looking forward to retiring, there was some part of him that was conflicted about this too. So I like the story of Jeff King, regardless of your interpretation. If he actually didn't like baseball

and he was that good at it, then that's kind of incredible because we just sort of assumed that everyone would like it. Of course, why wouldn't you like it? And if you're that good at it, then you must like it, but not necessarily. you know, so you can get tired of anything. So I kind of like it if that's the interpretation. And I also kind of like it if, in fact, he was just misunderstood all along and it was just that he had anxiety and he put so much pressure on himself that he couldn't enjoy it because he really wanted to succeed. So it wasn't that he didn't care. It was that he cared too much. And in fact, he said that in a 2020 article, he said, I think people misunderstood me thinking maybe I didn't care because I didn't throw my bat or my helmet

if I made an out. But I think my problem was maybe I cared too much. So maybe he was misunderstood. And I like that too, because sometimes like I'm not the most expressive person with my face, I think. And so sometimes I'll look. Well, we have to balance each other out, Ben. Yeah, I guess. But sometimes I'll look blasé about something. And actually, I'm having a great time. And I'm quite happy.

And someone will be like, what's wrong? And I'm like, nothing, nothing. I feel great. But I'm not conveying that, I guess, effusively enough. So I sympathize with Jeff King, who maybe was having a good time sometimes, but just didn't look like he was. So Jeff King was drafted first overall in 1986.

And I wonder, so let's say, I don't know, whatever. Pick the guy who's going to be drafted first overall the next year. And you're the team and you're scouting him. And you are like, okay, this guy's clearly the most talented player in the draft and we're going to pick him first overall the next year and you're the team and you're you're scouting him and you are like okay this guy's clearly the most talented player in the draft and we're going to take him first overall then you get to know him and you talk to his family and the people around him and you find out okay talent is the same this dude hates baseball do you do you draft him

well when king retired posnanski wrote he could have been a better baseball player. There's no doubt about that. He had the eye, the legs, the strength, and scouts will tell you that if he had the heart, he could have been a Hall of Famer. So yeah, maybe makeup matters, but there have been worse first overall picks who probably liked baseball better. And by the time he retired, his career was winding down anyway, and he had some back issues. But it took him a while to get established. And probably part of that was that, as he acknowledged, he was just too much of a perfectionist. Terry Collins said one day he went three for four and hit nothing but rockets. And the next day he went over four and changed where his hands were on the bat. But Posnanski wrote, he threw his guts and his back into the game,

but he never had the love. It was a job for him. If he could have put a time clock by his locker, he would have done just that. And as King himself said, playing the game for money is not the right reason. He'd been thinking for a while about retiring and Muser talked him into staying. And King said, it's the baseball mentality. You play when you're hurt. You play regardless unless you're about to die. I'm ready for life after baseball. There is more to life than baseball.

I'm finding myself looking forward to other things. Not everyone can be a, they'll have to tear the uniform off my back guy. Some guys will willingly take the uniform off. I will just say that every word that I type erodes my soul a little bit. Like I am not especially fond of writing. So I empathize and I say, yeah, go for it. Draft him. He's still going to make it. Yeah. Jeff Sullivan walked away from writing entirely.

Yeah, he did. Didn't leave anyone high and dry on a podcast or a website or anything. I'm not sure I could be any happier. That's the venom that you hear in the voice of someone that's got to edit Michael Bauman. Oh, no. I'm just teasing, Mikey. Yeah. Bauman's an easy edit.

Did we ever get resolution on if Adam Dunn hated baseball or if that was just a rumor? I don't know. Also, I feel like there's been a helicopter over my house for the last 20 minutes. So I think they are also worried about my cat. Who could say? But not everyone can love it, right? I mean, just the odds, the percentages. Probably you'd think everyone would have to love it to be dedicated enough to make it, but not necessarily. I like when athletes can come out and admit something like that. Or like, did you all see Giannis when the Bucks lost and the reporter asked them if

the season was a failure and he had this great thoughtful answer. It's a wrong question. There's no failure in sports. You know, there's good days, bad days. Some days, some days you are able to be successful.

So there's, you're not some days it's your turn. Some days it's not your turn. And that's what sports is about. You don't always win. Some other, other people is going to win. And this year, somebody else is going to win. Similar to that, we're going to come back next year,

try to be better, try to build good habits, try to play better, not have a 10-day stretch with playing bad basketball. You know, and hopefully we can win a championship. So 50 years from 1971 to 2021 that we didn't win a championship, it was 50 years of failures no it was not it was steps to it you know and we were able to win one hopefully we can win another one he actually like showed his human side and and many players would just be conditioned to be like yeah it's a failure if we don't win you know like you're expected to say that and if you

don't say that then someone will jump on you and say you don't want it enough but no yeah, it's a failure if we don't win. You're expected to say that. And if you don't say that, then someone will jump on you and say, you don't want it enough. But no, of course, it's not a failure. It can't be everyone failing except one single team. And not everyone can love what they do at all times. So you can be good at something without necessarily having it be a dream come true. Yeah. Yeah. I do like writing.

I'm sorry. I just don't want to give the impression that i don't like good it's just a joke i don't want you to retire although i mean jeff king i i think he had more kids than you have i know i know you've got a bunch of them get on it grant geez yeah he had uh i think he had seven. That's a lot of kids. That feels like a lot of kids. You know, as someone with none, it feels like maybe too many. Maybe, but I guess it was just enough for him.

So he walked away so he could keep having kids. And as of a couple of years ago, he had five grandchildren and he fishes and he enjoys the wide open spaces of Montana. And I guess maybe he has that pension too. So not a terrible life for Jeff King. Right now, Zach Eflin and Lucas Giolito are going head to head. And five days ago, Zach Eflin and Lucas Giolito also went head to head in a game of the drop. That game is over in two hours and two minutes. And this podcast is going to go fucking longer than that.

No. No. Right. fucking longer than that. No. No. All right. Well, we'll quit while we're ahead and the Rays are behind the White Sox. You know what? I'm going to just wager right now that that doesn't hold up. We'll see if I'm right

when this podcast is published. I'm not allowed to wager. I know. I know. All right. So thank you, those of you who are still here. Thank you. Thank you, those of you who are still here. Thank you.

Thank you, Grant. You're welcome. Actually, I've got, let's see, one, two, three, four more things to drop in order. No, I'm just kidding. Thank you. Thank you for having me. Meg must have several left. Yeah, I have a bunch left, but we can save them for the...

Yeah, for episode 2,500. Wow, wow. If we're all still alive and podcasting we will reconvene then. Don't forget all of you will die. Eventually. Thank you Jeff. Good luck winning 130 games or whatever

you're on pace for. I guess you're superstitious now that you work for a baseball team so you can't even acknowledge that I said that I think. No because the other day my lucky sweatshirt lost for the first time this season. What? Sweatshirt. I tell you what, if you want to load up on a specific team's gear, it might be less expensive

to go through the process of getting a job with that team instead of buying it all for yourself. Because they'll just give it to you. I had a lot of clothes before, but it's like half of everything that I own now. I'll go on a work trip and then I'll have to come back with a different suitcase.

But what I also don't get is they give a lot of sweatshirts and long sleeve and big stuff. And I mean, not every team is in florida but the one that i'm with is and it's a weird it's a weird kind of promotion uh that they do because like there's columbia fishing gear everybody where they should just well i don't need to you're not branding people but in any case we don't all need sweatshirts although i guess i specifically do the tampa bay race sent me a DJ Kitty onesie, and I still have

that. So they're just giving this stuff out. On that note, if not enough fans come to the ballpark for the giveaways, they just send it. They just mail it to people. They really did. I have it. How did they get your address? Yeah, I said, I want one on

Twitter. And they said, what's your address? I thought Jeff gave it to them as a prank. It wasn't like creepy. It was nice. Yeah, well, I said, I want one on Twitter. And they said, what's your address? I thought Jeff gave it to them as a prank. It wasn't like creepy. It was nice. Yeah, well, I mean, that's what the blue check used to give you. You know what I'm saying, people? There used to be some perks. I don't know.

It was never verified. Anyway. Okay. Thanks, Sam. Yeah. You're welcome. Is that a good Sam? Spot on. is an architectural historian and baseball researcher based in Boston.

And he writes, investigating juicing in baseball. At the beginning of the 2000 MLB season, baseball seemed to be flying off of hitters' bats. In April alone, a then-record 931 homers were belted for an average of 2.56 per game. By mid-May, many began to take notice. Jim Sherwood, a mechanical engineering professor at the University of Massachusetts Lowell, decided to get to the bottom of this phenomenon through scientific experimentation. In a series of experiments commissioned by Major League Baseball, Sherwood focused on the baseball itself, testing to see if it met the specifications established by MLB's rulebook. Explaining the inspiration for his experiment, Sherwood said, As a fan, it's exciting to see the home runs, but I guess you want to see the integrity of the game maintained as it had been in the past. We're going to answer whether the

ball is part of the problem or not, whether it's hotter than it's supposed to be. As part of the investigation, an unnamed team of baseball officials traveled to Costa Rica to tour the factory of Rawlings, the league's official ball manufacturer. Sherwood reportedly could not disclose his testing methods, but spoke of the difficulties in comparing a new ball to one produced even a few years prior. The material of the baseballs change. Temperature and humidity, these affect the ball. You can't really go backwards unless we find some preserved baseballs.

We're starting to track a history of the baseball. Sherwood's study, completed and released in June 2000, found that while balls were lively, they remained within the legal limits established by Major League Baseball. Another explanation would have to be found for the rise in home runs, David writes. Though I am not convinced. I've talked about this before. I've written about this before. I think the ball had a lot to do with the offensive environment and the number of home runs hit during the PD era.

We could call it the PD era or the steroid era because of the way that PD has shaped the culture of baseball and the history of baseball and the coverage of baseball. But I don't think they explain as much of the uptick in offense as people believe. Back then, they were not testing the drag of the baseball, which is what has produced a lot of the uptick in home runs in recent years. And as we know, that lively ball, the low drag ball, that alone was sufficient to produce higher home run rates than we saw in the PD era. That was many years after testing was implemented. So the ball alone can account for a lot of that. And there was a very sudden uptick in home runs and scoring around 93, 94

that would be tough to explain, I think, without the ball playing a part. Not saying PDs had no effect. You can see some PD artifacts too and aging patterns and outliers in the league. But I think the ball had a whole lot to do with it. It's one of my strong, uncommon beliefs about Major League Baseball. I laid it all out in an article at The Ringer a few years ago. So I will link to that on the show page. If you're not convinced, give me a chance to convince you.

So that was Y2K. Thank you for listening to EW2K. Thanks to those of you who are listening to us for the first time. Thanks to those of you who've listened to all 2000 episodes. I can't believe this thing is still going and it is a credit to our listeners and particularly our Patreon supporters. I actually floated the idea with Meg. Maybe we should do some sort of funding drive, try to drum up some new Patreon support on the occasion of our 2000th episode. We're a few hundred Patreon supporters short of 2000. So I thought maybe we could do a 2000 for

2000 drive. And then we didn't do anything with that idea because for one thing, we couldn't really think of any additional incentive to subscribe any extra perks that we could do or would do that we don't already offer. And so without any clever new inducements, we didn't do a campaign. But if you've been listening for a long time and you want to mark this occasion by tossing a couple of coins into our hats as a lifetime achievement award, we would be grateful, and it would help us continue to do what we do for many episodes to come. But it is the community and the feedback and the conversation with all of you that has

kept us going for so long. That's what makes this worthwhile. And yeah, the Patreon support doesn't hurt either. So you can go to patreon.com slash effectively wild, sign up and pledge some monthly or yearly amount to help keep the podcast going. Thank us for keeping it going this long. Help us stay almost entirely ad free. And of course, get yourself access to some perks. And the following five listeners have already done so.

Jeff Hawk, Austin Hoffman, Mary Lelko, Larry Hawley, and Peter Clemens. Thanks to all of you. Patreon perks include access to the wonderful Effectively Wild Discord group, as well as access to monthly bonus episodes, one of which we will be recording this weekend, plus playoff live streams and discounts on ad-free memberships and merch, and so much more. Patreon.com slash Effectively Wild. That will do it for today and for this week.

Gratifying that we can end this milestone week on a multiple of five, just as we used to years ago. Oh, and hey, I end this milestone week on a multiple of five, just as we used to years ago. Oh, and hey, I guess we should mention to head off some emails, Billy Preston did play on some songs on Abbey Road, just not on the medley. Got to give him credit for that. Got to give the Rays credit too, because my wager would have worked out. They did come back and beat the White Sox. Who else could have foreseen that? If you are a Patreon supporter, you can message us through the Patreon site. If not, you can contact us via email at podcastatfangraphs.com. Thank you. You can follow Effectively Wild on Twitter at EWPod. You can find the Effectively Wild subreddit at r slash Effectively Wild. Thanks to Shane McKeon for his editing and production assistance.

We hope you have a wonderful weekend and we will be back to talk to you early next week. Ben isn't here and we're lacking production. So this is me singing you the introduction Effectively wild Ben isn't here and we're lacking production So this is me singing you the introduction. The fact is it's wild. I would forward you a game report and say you can see the 110 pages that arrive every morning.

Oh, please do. I would love to. Yeah, I mean, if you could, that would be swell. Could you actually just send them every day? Yeah. Okay, but I'll send only the game report for our Complex League. How's everyone doing? Pretty good. How are you?

Answer at the same time. Thank you for doing that. All right. I guess we should start so Jeff can go back to reading Complex League reports. I didn't think I got a satisfactory answer to how Sam is doing. Oh yeah. Oh, the same. Great. Thank you.

Okay. We did it. The one I was going to draft and didn't draft was, was, was catcher empire politics. Cause it's kind of funny that they like think that that's something where they have to have an angle. Like what, what You don't know

because the cameras don't show it, but do the people on the bases, do they greet the umpires also? Oh, I got to go because there really are helicopters in a way that makes me think there's a murderer in my neighborhood. You're probably in the safest place you can be, but good luck.