Emergency Intercom - Drew comes out as straight with Barbie Ferreira

Episode Date: June 2, 2023

Barbie joins Drew and Enya to talk about red flags, her disturbed tiktok algorithm, and performing for toilet cameras To get 25% off your first order, plus free standard shipping, visit www.MeUndies.com/EMERGENCY Follow Enya on Insta: @EnyaUmanzor Follow Drew on Insta: @DrewPhillips09 To listen to the podcast on YouTube: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercomPodYT Don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercom If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercom Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey Spotify, this is Javi. My biggest passion is music. And it's not just sounds and instruments. It's more than that to me. It's a world full of harmonies with chillers. From streaming to shopping, it's on Prime. welcome to this episode of emergency intercom okay are you guys gonna say something or hey we're here um with my girlfriend yeah my boyfriend yeah i just feel like i'm being pushed over to the side for something

like yeah i mean like kind of okay you don't have to do that no okay that's i mean that's not okay i mean she was just trying to make me feel like better because you guys are like really we're like really i just want to address the fact that this chair seems very uncomfortable it isn't though so it isn't no i actually love it it's i've molded it to my body without fail sit like that on yeah i have to i have to like perch on the edge like i was saying i love it um okay so about like four months ago right i came on the podcast and said i had my first girl kiss and i kissed a girl and everyone was like who was it and everyone was like you're lying yeah no one believed me there's no way i'm here to confirm it's true yeah and my girlfriend was

my first girl kiss and we've been dating oh wait you guys are dating now yeah it's getting really serious it's been like what three days yeah yeah i'd say like three nights yeah oh okay so it's like literally i mean you can't really say you're dating yet then. Like it's only been three nights. No, no, no. We're like pretty much in. I mean, I tend to be a lesbian. So this is kind of like the timing.

Yeah, I mean, that's what I was going to say. I was going to say, both of you aren't like. I'm written by a woman. No, no, no. I'm sorry. What are we? I don't know. I'm written by a woman.

And that's i exude this like energy that like it's actually very true yeah that like women love me so i like made it happen you guys just like made it work for each other manifested me exactly manifested you wait what's your sign again pisces pisces okay pisces gemini in any world would a pisces and a sag even like like, get along for dating? Why not? Yeah, we're making it work. Okay, and I was like, you guys are, like, bending rules because it says we're

100% compatible, so that's what I'm on. Yeah, exactly. Every morning I check my horoscope, and it literally just says Barbie over and over. It says Barbie hard. No, Barbie every morning checks up on her tarot card reader i do i love them if you i got one today and it was like if you got this on your for you page there is someone thinking about you and

i was in i was it was me and it was me thinking i guess someone was thinking about you but like it probably meant like a lover and i don't know if drew's like you're i feel like you're not believing us you don't like i just don't i know i don't feel it it feels very like a lover and I don't know if Drew is like your lover like that. I feel like you're not believing us. You don't, I just don't, no, I don't feel it. It feels very like, it kind of feels like you're holding her hand hostage. Should we show her? We should show her. Oh, oh my God.

I have a lip oil. I got a lip oil from an Instagram ad, which I have been very much buying a lot of things from Instagram. My lips are dyed. They're just like an Instagram ad lip oil. Tastes good. Tastes delicious. So yeah, that's the proof.

Okay, yeah. I mean, when y'all kissed, he did sit in probably the most uncomfortable position I've ever seen him in. As men should. Yeah. But like, he just didn't like, I don't know. Men should be more uncomfortable. We were just talking about that. seen him in. And men should. Yeah. Like, okay. But, like, he just didn't, like, I don't know. Men should be more uncomfortable. We were just talking about that.

Yeah, no, they fully should. So maybe y'all should kiss more because he'll be uncomfortable. I love him. Yeah, I don't think he... I mean, we can move past the fake relationship because I get...

Yeah, it's real, but... It's real, but we don't have to, like, we don't talk about it. Yeah, because, I mean, this whole thing is gonna be like me watching y'all like date cause like at that point

like what am I here that's life from now on we'll move on that is literally life from now on you're like get fucking used to it get used to it

I used to make fun of all the IG ads and be like why are they showing me this shit I won't buy it but it is insane if somebody especially like a story ad

if I see a story ad enough i there have been times where i like see one and then skip it and then i'm like oh like trying to get back to it because i'm like i'm gonna buy it i'm gonna buy it where is it and then i can't get it again i recently bought a silky pajama set from an unnamed texas like sorority girl company and i tried to return it because it did not fit and it was mislabeled and I DM'd them like four times for a refund and they just refused to answer me so

maybe I'll just come out and say it I actually forgot the name because it was from an Instagram ad so it was the most random thing you've ever bought in your life it was truly so random and I felt like I bought these like silky pajamas and like furry like I was like yes and they come in it, like, I bought you, like, silky pajamas, and, like, free. Like, I was like, yes. And they come in.

It's, like, this big. I'm like, oh, well, no, no, no. It doesn't really, no. And then I try to DM them. I try to send them an email. Nothing. Get it together. Okay, getting to the point where you're sending an email, and you're going to reply as crazy.

Me to fucking Equinox. I had to email them 36,000 times because they stole $700 from me. How? Over. Done. them 36 000 times because they stole 700 from me how over done i like had a trainer for like a year because i needed like financial motivation to go i literally don't even remember his name anymore like literally my biggest he definitely played football in school and was tackled eight million times yeah that was a time like he was like definitely his head was his which equinox was this uh the gay one. Basically, I had like a bunch of training sessions left over and I told him several times.

I was like, please don't book me more sessions because I'm just like done. Like I feel like I know how to work out on my own. Like whatever, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Well, like come time to the end of like our last like you have to buy them in sets and come to the end of the last set that I bought. I was like, OK, okay cool like i'm free well i checked my account the next day and he charged me for eight more sessions and i was like oh this is crazy um i don't remember booking these and i don't remember going to one of these like because he said a package you have to buy a package and i was like yeah exactly i was literally how i've been i have

been giving savage x fenty 50 for four years because i never turned off my vip and you have to do a whole thing to turn it off so they literally take money from me every month and i have not bought bought like anything from them for like three years wait how much is it it's like 50 or something. Oh my gosh. Maybe it's less. Maybe it's less. Wait, do they send you like a package every month?

No. Just like you can buy it. It's like Costco. It's a membership. Are you fucking kidding me? Yeah, it's like a membership. That is actually batshit crazy.

Oh, AT&T does the same thing. Because of our first apartment, I never returned the router, so they charged me like $10 every month until I finished paying off this lost router. The way I was set up in New York, I never returned shit. Literally, it took me like until two years ago until i finished paying off this the way i was set up in new york

i never returned shit literally it took me like until two years ago to get a credit card because of all like the misgivings of me at 18 in new york like never returning a router never like paying my bills like you know and i had to fix it and it was it was a lot but i know that's like the thing every adult like real adult warned you about they're like if you fuck up your credit your life's gonna be living and I still believe it to this day I'm like I do not want a credit card I never want to use a credit card like they're gonna get me but to finish that story basically he charged me for these seven sessions or eight sessions I did one of them on accident and then he quit and then there were no there was no one to do the rest of the sessions with so i was just like sol and i emailed them 36 000 times to refund

me i'm not joking like i emailed them like 20 times over the course of like four days and they never got back to me and like i guess they won in the end because they still fucking go but like i literally want to cancel my membership so bad out of spite so much money it's disgusting why can't they just do a little refund give me my money back and they were like in the fine fine print it says no refunds and I was like okay bitch like watch me blow this spot up you should just start peeing in random corners of the locker room actually no because that already happened they do yeah I definitely they jizz in random corners of the locker room it's nasty vibes you're like I need to go there i've been

to equinox once and i had a panic attack i was like it's too much going on but it was the soho one it was a bit too much going on in there i was like in a yoga class i literally walked out i was like the energy here is like whoa it's really literally freaky deaky it's really dark i go we go at such specific times and we plan it around like normal people's work so i'm like we have to go when there's absolutely no one there and it's about to close. Is it like 11 a.m. or something?

Yeah, either super early or super late when they keep repeating when everything closes. Like that's the vibe that needs to be happening is the music is barely playing

and they're like, we're closing in 10 minutes. We're closing in five minutes. We're closed. Get out. Literally. I love that. You can't pay me

to go to Equinox, but I mean, it's a great gym is scary it's like i just feel like i'm gonna walk in and there's people just like i don't even know i i it's definitely a movie of some sorts in there for me but i go to the tiny gay gym i'm not gonna reveal where it is so the agenda location no but it's fun it's like there's literally no one there and that's how i prefer it except for me and my trainer shots i have to say something um the gay agenda is horrifying and y'all y'all are pushing it on to me and i'm done like everyone's wishing me a happy pride month and all this shit that's

just not me that's not the person i am i mean i mean i guess yeah you did change him yeah exactly you turned me out i did yeah you guys you guys are helping each you guys are helping each other find the the righteous path that's what's happening y'all are together we're like leaning into god exactly i've been saying i'm gonna to have my Christian arc and you turn me out. And I'm here to help you. Yeah, you're guiding me down the right path. You guys should start like a summer camp but for only straight people. I agree.

So like every weekend. Maybe not. I love that idea. Billions. Yeah. Let's do it. But yeah, I'm just kind of, i have my notes written down and i have inya abortion on counter and i've been saving this for so long what is that okay so inya has

inya has this lip tint that she puts on her lip you've probably seen it if you're like on your like uh getting targeted ads and stuff it's like the the one that you put on it it like fully peels off yes is it the typo the typology i feel like i am literally sponsored by it's not earlier it's like it's like say uh seishua or like some i don't know that i don't know how to pronounce it people have to like call shit like billy or something so i could like start saying names right because like yeah i don't know what fucking name it is. But, yeah, so she has it on there. And then instead of peeling it off

and throwing it in the trash can or in the toilet and flushing it, she peels it off and flicks it on the counter, and it just sits there, and it literally looks like a congealed mass of, like, blood. Oh, I love it. I mean, I did good today, yeah. I knew you were coming, so I, like, scraped it out of the sink because I was like, I don't want her to think that I emptied my diva cup in here.

And it's just like, oh, I actually would love that. I would love to just leave my diva cup out. Yeah, I did. This is like so gross. And I hate that. Like, this is where this conversation is heading right now. But I did have what I believe to be a minor miscarriage in the toilet um because yes something came out of my flow that was oh i don't want to touch you um oh because you're jealous and yeah i

mean i'm just respecting barbie's property so i'm not gonna like property hold on yeah let's unpack that yeah like you're you're her property now i just don't own anybody and no one owns me i mean but she owns you you don't own anybody because she owns you so like he chose it he chose yeah exactly yeah you chose that life i guess i guess but but i had something that was so odd come out of my flow that i almost called drew into the bathroom to look at it you should have i'm so fascinated by periods it's just it was just too much um but it was really really gross and i was like damn and then yesterday actually i like ran out of the bathroom to grab an edible like in the middle of like getting ready to use the shower and i didn't flush the toilet and i was so scared

you were gonna go in and see like the massacre in the toilet but maybe i feel like you love that shit no yeah no it's beautiful i love i love like i just mentioned playing with the diva cup she can't empty her diva cup without me in the room like it's very good because then it's always clean when you need to get to it because you just like cleans it right up yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah famously the past three nights has been really illuminating and drew in y'all's relationship i guess yeah y'all have learned a lot in three days famously famous i that is literally the my most favorite thing that you say is famously like i'm literally gonna steal it and make it my own z-way oh chad is z-way she says that in her show i can't take credit for it but she famously is infamously too you know my new vibe because i'm on my like

villain arc yeah you're in your villain i really am like myself and i'm like what have i become you know and but that's good yeah i think that's a good place for women to be but because i've talked about that on the podcast like women needs to dig into being selfish villains evil scammers we need more women who are scamming we do need more women who are scamming wait they're actually and i'm the one to be scammed oh yeah literally okay well also do you i was watching yesterday the cut and like it was so fucking weird they somehow put in they were talking to like old people and like asking them about them being scammed scammed do y'all think when you're older you'll be hella scammed when i'm older i them being scammed. Do y'all think when you're older, you'll be hella scammed? When I'm older, I will be scammed.

There will be like some super futuristic, like crazy, like scam that I fall for. Oh, you know what happened the other day that's not a scam? I was at dinner and I started getting all these calls from like random area codes, like from New York, right? And then I answer one and they're like, come over. And I'm like, what is this? And then I get these texts that're like um come over and i'm like what is this and then i get these texts that are like i forgot what the word was it was like inbound or outbound someone

put my number on like an escort ad so i got like over a course of an hour i got like 20 calls being like yo where are you wait but they were like obsessed with you though no but i don't know i have no idea if someone did it on purpose yeah or it was like because my area code is like from new york maybe it was like an accident like they put like a digit off yeah because it did stop after an hour like the ad and they were like it's from your ad that you posted i'm like what ad fuck i wish we could find the ad to see what they were like. That would be so awesome. What was being advertised. It was a lot. And it was like in the middle of the night.

And it was like people like it was like Bronx, like uptown. Like it was like literally like they're like, I'm in Washington Heights. And I'm like, what? Like I'm literally like I'm like at dinner. Like like I'm like backtracking everything. I'm like, where is this? I'm putting my number on. Like it's just yeah.

Yeah. So I've been very good about like being able to tell what's like a scam call versus like a real call. And I still like, I thought I was good about it, but I still answer them. And they do ask for my social security number all the time. But even with like someone like in my personal life, I will be like, I'm not texting it to you. I'm not like. Who is asking you for your social I will be like, I'm not texting it to you. I'm not like- Who is asking you for your social security? Just like-

I think I've asked. I literally think I've asked for it before. I don't like texting it. I don't like saying it over the phone. Okay, why won't you just text it to me? Because I am the opposite. I'm like, what? Like I literally will just like keep-

I am so bad with keeping track of it, but I think the difference is I haven't had my shit stolen or anything and he's literally had his whole like life stolen they literally drained my bank accounts in a crazy way when i was like 18 i so long story short i think i've told it already i don't know if i have but like the universal shit when i went to universal i tried to sneak alcohol in they like i was like 17 and they were like uh this is not okay and they took me to like this back room with like security guards yes and it was a fucking bitch like she was evil she was wicked real officer so fucking bad you were

working the security line at universal right now man syndrome where it's like the big man that works out a bunch because they like are so small, like Napoleon complex, but like in a woman. But because she was like this. Because I was like, this isn't grapefruit. No, I said I said, oh, it's grapefruit. I said it's raspberry water. And they were like, one guy was like, oh, OK, yeah, you can go. But like, you can't bring that in.

And then she was like, stop. And like, she was like, let me smell. And she was like, this is raspberry vodka. And I was like, OK, let me smell and she was like this is raspberry vodka and i was like okay you should be like okay you're a fucking alcoholic yeah why do you know that yeah why do you know it's literally crazy i don't know i and it was closed down too it was just it was a part of like uh do you remember like playlists shit like like it was like a convention for youtubers and they would close that down. So that's live. Yeah.

So that YouTubers could go to Universal. So it was one of those nights. So I think that's the worst thing that's happening that day, honey. Yeah. I literally, that's not the worst thing entering the park. The craziest thing is Enya and my twin sister Madeline both had alcohol on them and they got to go through, but they stopped me because I took it off my waist. I was serving 16 and sexy. Well, I was giving sexy hot hot too but in like a different way like i mean yeah but so

they took me to universal gel and they took out the oldest fucking phone iphone i've ever seen in my entire life like it was old even then like it was insane and tiny and they like took pictures of me in front of a blue wall and made me turn to my side is it like in the universal backlots i don't know because i want those photos so bad i'm sure it was like up on the wall for like a year because he was you were banned for a year like he wasn't allowed to go in and they were like even if you step foot in this parking lot you're going to jail and i was like okay fucking relax like this is. But basically they put me back on the bus to like go home. And I'm sitting on this bus and like I was on there for like 15 minutes and she was just

waiting to see if like anybody else would like hop on. And she had to charter me alone on this big ass like public bus all the way back to the hotel. And I get there and I get to my room and I'm like um I try to like find my car my key card and I'm like oh my god I don't have my wallet so I call the bus company and they're like oh we don't have your wallet either and then I call the universal I'm like oh I must have just left it in like this scanner they must have like taking it we're taking that shit yes exactly they all denied it fully and I was like fuck dude like how am i gonna get home because

i'm in florida and so and i also had my social security card in there and i was like florida universal yes exactly okay it's different yeah exactly you had your shit stolen for scamming yeah exactly i mean i sold it the universal people drain my fucking bank account oh yeah literally wait the common denominator common denominator is india and florida absolutely it is florida in general which i mean if you look back at my videos i did always have a lot of expensive makeup and it was from the wallet yeah it was because i stole y'all's wallets and i sold your information i have like no money in that in that debit card it was like negative 200 i'm like good luck yeah have fun have fun more money in please but yeah i haven't had anything like that happen to me so i've just been lucky

and brave and that leads me to my next question is do y'all think you would because i just watched this tiktok of these like girls saying how they were trying to help somebody who was drunk in a lobby of a hotel this older woman and that they just approached her really wrong and they were like, we're going to take you upstairs and that she was just like, you're going to what? Like she was freaking out

and then they were like, oh, I think she thought we were trying to sex traffic her because we were just like following her. We were following her to make sure she wasn't too drunk. You also have to, the amount of like warnings

I get on my TikTok, because I have to get a new TikTok because I can't get into my original TikTok so I'm on like really just like we'll shout it out yeah we'll shout it out we'll shout it out just so enough people interact

with the empty account I just need something because my algorithm is like what I assume like a Facebook mom is on and it is like every other video where it's like these are things that happen when people are trying to sex traffic you and i'm like going crazy because i'm like oh this is a lot of time

yeah you're getting your older people are obsessed with like we're like telling people about like how people sex off that they have like these like zip ties on your like door like you're trying to take it off but do y'all know the the like jeep stuff where like um there's like's Jeep Wranglers and the rubber duckies, and it's this whole culture in Jeep Wranglers. You get ducked, and you have to put the duck in your dashboard. Well, it's this whole thing that Jeep owners do that they trade rubber duckies, and it's like, you've been ducked or whatever. Well, this one girl who had a Jeep Wrangler found a duck on her hood,

and she made like made like a whole tix talk series the new tactic for sex traffic exactly exactly they're gonna put the rubber duck on your car so that they can always identify your car with the duck and the wonder everyone's so paranoid it's like crazy it's like every other videos either that or like um like reviews of cruises that i get and it's like this is the all adult virgin cruises and this is what you get for the all-inclusive package that is like we literally need to go yeah do you like cruises no but i i'm willing to go for like an experiment of sorts yeah because like i really need to go again as an adult because i've been on one when i was younger um and i want to go

and just like black out for seven days yeah break my sobriety yeah i like i think the only thing it is is like getting fucked up it's like i've never seen a video of someone prepping for a cruise without putting tequila into a wine bottle i did not know this that they sneak in alcohol because it's very expensive on there but there's also the all-inclusive ones which i again i have been really I have been really in that. I have no plans on going on a cruise, but I know everything about the Virgin Atlantic cruise. Your TikTok feed is like a tarot card reader being like, so you're going to get sex trafficked on your next cruise. That is literally.

That's what the next tarot reader is going to be. And the way they deliver it is like, okay, you guys, this is going to save your life. If you're ever at a Trader Joe's and then you see like a duck on your like wheel and i'm like what the i literally now like walk around like paranoid yeah the thing is i'm like so aloof and i genuinely don't think my brain functions at a high rate at any point anymore which is crazy because i don't think i've done that many bad things to like in my life to make my brain work at such a slow function. But it's literally mine is just like, I am just too aloof in the world. And I could literally be walking down the most dangerous street ever. But I'm like, if I feel like I'm in danger, I'm just freaking myself out for no reason.

And then I'm like, it's chill. Like, I'm fine. I used to walk around like butt ass naked in like New York at 2 a.m. Titties out like in like no one around. That's my girl. Like I it was like I have no fear anywhere, which is a problem. I know. I feel like it's a huge. But it's also like what happens when you just grow up like in certain like cities.

It's like your bar of danger is like so much lower because you're just like I've been around danger. Like I grew up in danger're just like i've been around danger like i grew up in danger yeah literally you were did you grow up in brazil no i grew up in new york okay but i did go to brazil oh yeah you were saying you got like shipped off to brazil i did for a little bit it's classic like you just like ship them off my mom like when she had me was like super young and had like not even an apartment to her name and also was like single because my dad was like her roommate and then so it's like oh that's gonna happen to me and drew yeah exactly so um yeah so she was like i need you to like leave like when i was like one like just like spent a year in brazil um while she like tried to get a job and she she did go

to culinary school that's a serve yeah i want to go to brazil really badly you should you're gonna buy yeah i love by yeah that's awesome real school i went there for the first time um it's a bit like like hectic like i i'm you know also on my new tiktok i've been realizing there's a difference between a traveler and a vacationer and i'm gonna say it right here i'm a vacationer i do not need that i do not want a backpack through anything i don't want a backpack i don don't want to like, I don't want that. I don't want it. I don't want to see all the sites. Like also we have iPhones now.

Like I don't need to see it. Why? So I could take a picture of it. Bitch, y'all are taking pictures of it. I'm going to see it. I'm not waking up early to go like hike a mountain to go see some clouds. Like I just am not doing that. And it's like, i want to vacation and a lot

of my friends who grew up rich love to travel and like see the sights of different countries i'm like i'm good i like want to get a hotel room and then stay in the hotel room the entire time it's giving that but i will say i am a bit of a traveler because like there are some things that i'm like oh i have to see that like i have to see stonehenge one day like even though it's gonna be so so fucking underwhelming but like i simply must get like a helicopter charter over there and they probably do yes i'm terrified of helicopters i know they like freak me out everybody who leaves coachella on a helicopter i'm like y'all don't like fear did you guys go you have no fear no we didn't go no yeah it's working do you um like coachella no it's pretty awful right it's pretty awful i'm i do not like crowds because i get like really claustrophobic which is like so

i'm very lame but i i used to go for like brand deals to like make money um and i would like stay in the hotel i think the only set i've ever watched was like in 2000, like 17, 17. I saw like Grimes once. Oh, shit. And that's about it. Was this like post spaghetti eating like homeless art? That was like absolutely like during it. I think it was pre Elon Musk.

It was like, gosh, I don't even know. But I remember I swindled with my friend. She actually was nikki takashi as a podcast as well she i remember so vividly i was she like swindled this like security guard with like ten dollars to let us into like the artist pass area and it worked oh we pretended to know grimes like i didn't say anything i kind of just sitting there like and bewildered at her like ability to do that and she she got us in and that's it and then i went like once more for like a brand deal and i literally stayed at the hotel i did not go to the festival i just don't like like it like i don't the dust it's the dust

i don't like festival it's like hot and it's like i actually didn't want to go this year because of like ethel and like charlie and like julia and everyone but i was unfortunately working but i did this year was literally for the gays the girls and the gays absolutely yeah 100 but you can't you literally couldn't pay me any amount of money to go to coachella because i think it's like i literally am like it's demonic i say that like i don't do like the most absurd things for us attack i will i'm like yeah i love no i love that oh that's a good idea yeah we should do that but like oh it's so i i just don't like it either like i don't like being around like a bunch of people i don't know it freaks me out i'm like some the killers in here the killers the killer yeah literally someone's

gonna stab me with like a dirty needle or some shit like it's giving me simply like i feel like i cannot breathe there's a lot of people around me like i like freak out i'm like i'm not a good hang turns out yeah i just turns out turns out i am not turns out i stay in i'm not the vibe i'm not the vibe would you ever do a hot air balloon you said you hated helicopters um i i spent some time in albuquerque new mexico and that is like a big part of the culture there and like i've heard that every year like people die oh there's a balloon i would i would be the one it's actually really gorgeous like i remember i was doing uh it's like 2019 i was doing a movie there and like i woke we had to be there like 5 a.m so that you see i was like at a location and

you see all these balloons like just in the air and it's like magical, gorgeous. I won't be stepping on it. I actually realized after going to Six Flags like last year, I do not need any thrill. Really? I need no thrills. I need nothing.

I don't want to go to a roller coaster. I don't want to like be on a hot air balloon. I want to skydive. I don't want to do any of that. Yeah, no, I don't want to do that. I'm just like, I wouldn't go wouldn't got like whatever here never had the intention for me to get get in a plane and like fall from the fucking sky like literally why would i be doing that i just don't want to i i used to like and you have to train for it you have to like do shit to get to like i just want to do

it with someone on my back yeah yeah you would have you just want i want a man close to me i also only watch i know i only watch guy on guy porn because i like respect a woman exactly no i knew that about you i caught it a couple times in the past few days three days whoa you have a problem with like porn it's not a problem i'm just studying i just think it's you know it's we're working on it yeah okay yeah you're gonna help him you're gonna fix him we have church tomorrow I mean you are fixing him yeah in a lot of ways the church potluck

yes what are y'all bringing mac and cheese mac and cheese what is it a casserole oh which I'm pretty sure

I'm pretty sure I've never had a casserole in my life best casserole now that I'm a Christian I like really oh it comes along with it yeah it's just like yeah I don't think I've ever had a casserole and I don't know if I can say what a casserole is like i don't know what it is a dish of like

canned goods in one it's just a mushy pile of yumminess but i'm also white so i love a good casserole yeah you grew up on a lot of casserole kind of casserole green bean green bean casserole i'm allergic to green beans so really a little bit of a red flag yeah your beige flag have you seen the beige flag red flags because i was thinking about i've been thinking a lot about my red flags lately i actually almost wrote on a note i was just like why i am the biggest lesbian red flag to ever exist and one is a starbucks drink i know you pulling up with a starbucks i was like it's literally like warm Like you've been carrying it for like three hours. I'm like a human ashtray.

I love analog cigarettes. I love. Which I can get down with. I literally savored your cigarettes that you rolled me. The kids are canceling Jenna Ortega for smoking a cigarette. I'm like, damn, they really, they gave up on me. Cause no one's ever done that. We need to save Barbie.

No one wants to save Barbie. It was like all it was like i'll start it i'll start the movement yeah honey i've been smoking since i was 16 okay you're not fixing me you can't fix me i'll do the thing where it's like i'll record you for like three seconds and then be like she said if this gets a million likes she'll stop smoking my grandma said maybe that's what i need that's the push i need you need you need how many likes would it take how many likes would it take honestly like and i can't even give you a number because it i have been to the dentist trying to get my teeth whitened and they were like you can't smoke for three days and i have left and paid the fee i have been like i'm so sorry three days? Barbie famously rolls her own cigarettes, which is really crazy.

I love that energy. I do roll my own cigarettes. I've smoked everything cigarette-wise, tobacco-wise. I used to smoke Marlboro 27s. I jeweled for a long time. Jewels were ops, bro. They ruined my life. Drew and I did discuss having, like, biological children.

Oh, my God. Oh, wait. Y'all, like, actually did. Like, y'all literally were considering it at dinner. I think it'll fix my depression. And I think that no one has ever thought this before, but, like, it might just fix all my problems if I have a baby. Yeah.

I do. Just put a baby on top of everything. I really do need a child. I need a child mostly because i want because i was watching selling sunset i was telling you it gave me baby fever because it's like they're never with their kid but they're always like i'm gonna go back to my son okay every time there's drama they're like i'm gonna go back to my son i don't need this right now oh that is such a good like argument like i literally have a fucking kid i can't be

doing this with you i don't have time for this i't have time for this. I have to go be a mother. I have to go be a mother. Mother. Wait, mother. I have to go breastfeed. I have to go analog feed my children. And they're like Versace, like get up. And they're like, oh my God, this is so disgusting, isn't it? And it's like, everyone's like, yeah, I get it, girl.

I've been there. The empathy that comes along with being a mother. The last season of Sally Sunset, I just watched. It was so good. I need to tap in. No, I don't watch it. Christine, we miss. We miss Christine.

But there's a couple of girls who are fighting for the Christine spot. I don't know if they're winning. I don't know if they're winning. She's just irreplaceable. Well, yes. But there's, again, there's a few girls that are trying to be like the bitch. And you can't just try. You're either the villain or you're not we have that conversation all the time where like we gotta start being nicer to the villains of reality tv because they are what makes it

interesting and if like the invention of the internet like along with um like reality tv it kind of like ruined it because everybody's like fuck fuck this bitch and tries to like ruin their career. Like, no, we need the villains. We need it. And you either are a villain or you're not. And you can't make yourself a villain.

Yeah. Sometimes when I'm like feeling like really burnt out, I just want to watch something that has no plot, no villains, nothing. And even like I was watching the secret life of pets. And as soon as it started getting like too crazy, I turned it off.

Cause I was like, I need to watch a SpongeBob episode. I know in 15 15 minutes it'll there's a conflict and then there's a resolution the villains are what makes the stakes high sometimes i don't want high stakes sometimes i want the lowest stakes yeah the like most empty thing ever i should just start watching like what's the kids watching bluey am i like out of it like i need to know because we're about to have yeah we're about to have our child oh yeah i mean are y'all gonna let your kids watch like coco melon or are you gonna actually take miss rachel hello we're gonna do we're gonna go straight to like schindler's list yeah oh yeah fallen angel yeah just the good ones we're just like it's gonna what is it

like a film like an annoying film bro do we want that or do we want that i think so yeah like what do what are we trying to like what do you think i think it also depends like if y'all have like a boy like are y'all gonna make an annoying boy or and if you have a girl are you gonna make her like we're gonna have the girl like we're gonna have the girl and she's gonna be an annoying pretentious film nerd but she's gonna have swag and charisma that like it's infectious so it's not pretentious you know like if i went on like a spew about movies what i just don't know that like you're the do you watch your movies i love movies i think i watch movies i don't it turns out you should watch solo You should watch Solo. Okay.

What is that? It's like a really good movie. Dope. What's the pitch? Have you seen it? Yeah. It's basically about sodomy and eating shit and stuff. Oh.

Oh, is it that where they all are in the human center? Yeah, they're all in a little bowl. Oh, yeah. I've been there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, so you all have in the little bowl oh yeah yeah I've been there yeah yeah oh so y'all also this film called Two Girls One Cup

is actually really advanced oh I love that one's a good one when I was in high school I like had like a really like nihilistic arc like it was really

really gnarly existential vibes I genuinely like was convinced that I was an alien at one point oh my god this is why we're together

I know we're like twins. Oh, yeah, because y'all are both actually fucking crazy. We are like fucking crazy dogs. Whatever. Well, I decided that I don't need to be hanging out with anybody younger than 21 ever again because I've decided my biggest pet peeve is here. Oh, yeah, he's...

You should know you're dating. The leg's asleep because it's not comfy yeah that was so slick i like acted like i was leaving but i actually grabbed my vape and hit it yeah so no one has to see it but i just don't need to be around i've decided my biggest pet peeve is when someone a little younger than me says like some shit where they think they're bringing like a really intense conversation to the table and it's like you know like what I realized recently is I just need to surround myself with people who I trust and I'm like

you just found this out what's happening like what are we talking about? How old are you Anya? I'm 24 Yeah I'm 26 so so much older than everyone here and it's okay but yeah that. Not Kai Yeah Kai's 8. How old are you? 8,000 years old.

38? No, we weren't going to let you go. 36? 8. No, he's 29. You didn't think about that. No, 38. Yeah, he's 29. Hello.

He's 29, but like 48 in dog years or... How does it go? Like, you're really old. I think I would be like 111 in dog years. That's hot. Wait, we were literally just talking about like you saw everybody uh posting like the dog who's like 30 like the oldest dog ever no like put him out of his fucking misery no he's usually our chihuahua his eyes are melting out of his face live too long like we need

to like we need to just have a service like i wish we could read their brain waves and see if they wanted to be around anymore because in dog years that thing is 240 years old like put it out like it doesn't want to be here there's no way it wants to be here it doesn't even it's not even aware that it's here i love like that's the thing i love that i back to the thing about like 21 year olds and under because i think this like somehow connects in my brain but like that is the kind of shit that i have been seeing on my reels i let's address my algorithm a little bit oh it's insane it's actually like so i have been like getting a lot of like like because i make fun of it i get a lot of people or make fun of it and i don't mean i just

like send it to people because it's entertaining and i do support like you know young people young people like expressing themselves on the internet but it's's all like, it's all like, you know, like when he's at your locker and like he doesn't trust you and he like lies to you about the text. And it's like, I'm deep in the drama. And I've also been watching like college like loyalty tests like this. And they have millions of likes. It's crazy. And it's like so like under 21. I don't even know what it's like

wow he's really going to the girl's crib and like he has a girlfriend right here and it's like it's like who has the time also i'm gonna job challenge everyone i thought we were gonna talk about 15 year olds like it has to be 15 years interacting with it like fuck like that's like dead rose emoji vibe yeah that's when I was in middle school and I was like fuck I can't believe I have to have sex next year like in 8th grade

like I thought it's like my boyfriend isn't like honest with me I'm like you're 17 years old like I just it's okay your daddy was never going to tell you the truth

yeah I'm even reading like I don't know if I'm just being I'm like in an era right now that I don't even know what to name it but I've been reading

this like congeniality yeah it's like my like i'm observing like the 21 year olds and like seeing because i'm no longer 21 and i you know still feel like i am like a teenager sometimes and i'm like what is going on with me like am i going through like a quarter life crisis where like i'm no longer playing teenagers on tv like i'm aged out of it like i'm like now i'm college age i'm like holy fucking shit but now you're lead you're the lead yeah yeah you're the girl yeah sometimes i'm the girl sometimes i'm just a team player yeah i thought we were gonna talk about your um buttholes and boobs our algorithm oh yeah i was gonna say well also not only that but that that being your algorithm does kind of make sense and puts a lot of things into perspective because like the third time we hung

out we just watched porn yeah we did it wasn't like it was it wasn't like we weren't we weren't yeah we weren't like this is we we did we put on the tv I know but like I need to clarify we weren't like all like jerking off it was literally the scariest shit I've ever seen in my entire life yes the eggs the eggs my algorithm is like I think Instagram

now like fully just allows like whatever like they're down for whatever I've seen whole on Instagram I wonder if it's like just not like going under the radar oh actually i have to show you like i see you know those girls that it's like it's like such a like it's like on every algorithm i'm pretty sure it's not but it's like those girls are like 10 million likes and they just like have like these giant titties yet cold it's all no dead ass free the hole also like it went from that to three

best oils to keep your wiener moisturized business on reels i'm literally on like steroid guy like reels because i find it hilarious amazing like it's like insane like everything oh my god i'm drew loves this i love creatine yeah it makes me nice and big. What does it do? What is it? It's like, it's good for recovery, but it also is like low-key a vasodilator. Maybe, I don't know if it's a vasodilator. Use real words. Yeah, like I didn't go to college. I like literally went to community college for a week, so. Actually, literally me.

But it is like a vasodilator or something like that. Right. Or like it adds water to your muscles but basically it makes you look bigger after you work out so can I shoot it into my ass yes

yeah we should we should start injecting it into certain parts that need a little let's see what happens I think I'm gonna get silicone balls implanted

yeah what's wrong with your balls Drew I just want them to be bigger I mean I would have assumed you've they're too small seen them yeah I've seen them

you know I just want nasty pool balls. I have nothing to say, period. You just want giant balls. I love that. We were just talking about that, though, and that's, like, so gross. And I'm sorry to anybody who's watching

who has giant balls, but, like, get a grip. Yeah. Yeah, apart from Drew, I haven't seen a penis in real life in, like, fucking years. And you are so lucky. And I'm the broken sigma yeah drew turned me out too yeah you guys that's what i'm saying you guys are like healing each other because that's how it should be you know i think i'm like at an age where i'm just like i

don't i don't need to be gay i don't need this we've literally talked about that before i don't need to be gay anymore have you seen uh saucy santana on live with uh i don't know if it was young miami or i can't believe i'm blanking on carisha carisha yeah i don't know who it was but um they were like on live and saucy santana was just like once i hit 50 i'm not doing this gay shit anymore like it's just like you don't you don't do it dude i watch i'm like again my algorithm is straight and i'm like i'm fantasizing about it i'm like this seems so like just chill yeah man does the housework i do my own thing like that's lit i love it it is the most simple thing ever but like people are trying to like mess that up like people are people are trying so hard to be like but like work should be equally divided no no my first relationship is i don't do anything

so i don't know what that is like maybe i just need someone to like i i need to find someone online like on like one of those we need to get you a caretaker yeah caretaker king yeah because that's really what i need is just someone who's literally gonna hand me the water from over there and just like let me be just like in a little bubble on my couch. I do need to be taken care of. That's all I need. And my partner needs to be like either like, like, no, actually needs to be absurdly fucking disgustingly rich. Like that's it.

Like I need, that's what I need. Yeah, but I feel like that's such a. It's hard to find. Yeah, it's such a specific market. Like you have to be such a specific person. It's like selling your you do none of us can keep our mouth quiet enough to get into like this section of life where someone with that much money will like but people with that much money want like silence if they're not they want silence and sex but the thing is it's like also people with a lot of money like if you and they're like not like the most fortunate looking person which is of course like all of them um hello elon musk is hot what oh elon you're bad

drew i thought we were together girls right here like i'm sorry not you're gonna steal my man the second elon's in my dms i'm leaving oh my god you're leaving me for elon not now not now yeah yeah y'all have like three more days we have like the weekiversary oh my god what are you guys

gonna do for your weekiversary oh my gosh we go to Universal Florida yeah we're gonna do Universal Florida

and get like the big grand tour can we go to Disney I've also been really into like Disney bounding like not like personally

but just observing and like watching yes I do need to do Disney I need to open the what do we Disney bound as guys not like personally but just observing and like watching yes I do need to do Disney I need to open the pin what would we Disney bound as guys I wanna go

like guys can I come like no you know I'll take your pictures where what is it

why would we be I'm Woody and you're the the what is the girl oh I forgot her name Jessie Jessie

and then you're like mr potato head i love it it's actually potato head now it's just potato head so that's what i'm saying being straight is easy i like this is what i'm talking about it's like you know i love be gay love to be gay as you know my partner too but it's it's sometimes it's just easier so that's why we found each other yeah we both have the same goal we're settling down oh the goal was just to like make it work yeah let's make it work and like let's give no like there's no other way but to make this work yeah i mean before you know it you'll be like 30 oh Oh my god. And then what?

I mean, Harry's doing good for himself. What? I'm not 30. I mean, you're pushing. How old are you really? 29. So he's pushing it, yeah. I mean, it's the closest you could get to 30 other than being 31. It truly is. When's your birthday? What's your sign?

May 27th, January. Oof. What? Wait, what's that? I don't know. That makes a lot of sense. May 29th?

27th. 27th? Is it May 29th? Do you know a lot of astrology? No. I just like to pretend. Okay. Yeah, it's hard.

What is a Pisces to you? It's hard to be gay again have you ever been in a conversation with someone you're flirting with and acted like you knew exactly what was happening with astrology shit absolutely every single like person i date it's like let's add each other in the pattern and then it's always like something awful because i've been like and they're like you know what this is even better because like we're gonna like overcome it and then we don't. We do not overcome it. I've also been dating a lot of Tauruses.

That has to come to an end. No more Tauruses. So Tauruses aren't good? It's like the only sign I won't do right now. Wait, who else? I feel like there's a lot of Tauruses in the world. A lot. What is it?

Orion's birthday is the most. Which is a Scorpio. Scorpio. Oh, Virgo. Virgo. Oh, my God. She's going to be mad. She's a Virgo, not a Scorpio. Scorpio. Oh, Virgo, Virgo. Oh, my God. She's going to be mad. She's a Virgo.

Not a Scorpio. Wait, wait, wait. What was it? What was I saying? There's, like, a lot of them in the world. Like, a lot of Tauruses? Yeah, Tauruses. Yeah, there's, like, a lot of.

There's a lot of Sages, too. I feel like. But my mom says she conceived me on St. Patrick's Day, which is ridiculous. Because I have never once celebrated St patrick's day with my mother but she like like went to like fucking she probably went to a really good fucking party yeah like she just fucked up oh aries is the number one oh really yeah aries i'm three people who know like oh wait no this is leo and bergo i just i just like to say it i just like to like be like a massage whatever nikki minaj is a side i know that's i was literally about to quote her um i'm an aquarius everybody always guesses me right which just makes me feel annoying

yeah yeah everybody's like you're an aquarius i'm like yeah they're like yeah when i say i'm a pisces people freak the fuck out because then i'm like oh i'm like a pisces and they're like what's the other one and I'm I don't know if it's like a moon or something like what the other sign is and I'm like I'm a Pisces Gemini and when I tell them that they freak the fuck out like in the craziest way they're like oh yeah I like Gemini that's why we're together exactly exactly but yeah they tell me I'm like the worst person ever, that I'm like manipulative, evil, emotional, the victim. And that's why I like you. I love that. Exactly.

I actually have been looking for someone who just serves victim all day. It's giving victim. I want to be the villain and I want like... Yeah, yeah. We can help you. Thank you. Or I can help you be like like, attack him if you want. Okay.

It would be easy. Also, sorry, I was just on my phone. My mom was calling me. And that's either to pay the phone bill or something bad happened. Because I'm always convinced if someone's calling you on the phone, it's something bad happened. Every time my mom calls me on the phone, I answer it, like, in a haste. Like, is everyone alive? And she's like, yeah.

I'm like, okay, good. That's all I need. Yeah. And she instilled that fear in me. I know, literally. That's, like, anybody from my family calls, I'm like, something bad, terribly bad has happened. And then I'm like, okay, good. That's all I need. Yeah. And she had still that fear in me. I know, literally. That's like anybody from my family calls. I'm like, something bad, terribly bad has happened. And then I'm like, what happened?

And they're like, I just want to talk. Just want to say hello, check in. Nah. You're hiding. I did a, do you know what a sensory deprivation tank is? Absolutely. Okay. So have you ever done one?

I did a sensory deprivation room. Okay. How was that? I feel like you might have done the same thing because what you were describing was so big mine was like a giant room with a puddle on the floor that's the room

because you can go into a pod oh he was being sex trafficked and I just filmed him from above like naked floating around for an hour no I was genuinely paranoid that there were cameras on me oh me too in the was like i was like laying down and then i got up and i kind of did like a very like maybe schizoaffective thing and i went around and like everything that i could see it was like just checking i did the same thing i like opened the door so the light would come in

and i looked around i was like okay there's no cameras in these walls so that's when i'm peeing um i'll be like if you're listening to this you're a pervert because sometimes i'll be at work and i'll have a mic i don't want to like on no one's listening to it but just in case i like whisper like threats to people just in case i'm like peeing or like whatever and like no they can't they can't sell your piss track because if they do it's gonna be like yeah you like it you fucking little piss baby you know what i mean like i'm like i have to and i'll check everything yeah i used to like love just like being naked publicly in like spas and stuff and now i'm like really paranoid and i think it's um the internet and age yeah i'm the same way i'm the same way i hate being like in like

the locker room naked but actually recently i have like actually just been like yeah literally the disgusting man that walks around that's all me i'm like really instilling a lot of like yeah confidence yeah she's teaching you to like be the man in the room yeah like yeah i ew oh that's my man right there is that your man that's my man that's my man right there is that your man that's my man I don't mind being butt naked nasty also something is I can't I'm not gonna say it I was like something's desperately wrong with me

because I have fully felt myself performing for the male gaze in case there's a camera recording me pissed I gotta give it a show if it's happening if it's happening that's so funny I feel so. I'm like, I gotta give it a show if it's happening. If it's happening, that's so funny. I feel so good. I'm like being like, oh. Like the Ariana Grande video that I was telling y'all about where she wouldn't show the right side of her face.

Just like working the camera at any cost. I want to like get to that level. Just like the only thing that matters is how I look on camera, which is like a really liberating feeling. Sometimes you just, you just watch yourself. You ever just watch yourself back and go you know what it was good all the time yeah it was good yeah i i just like at this point have accepted i i genuinely and one of those people are like i'm pretty in person i'm like you just have to see me in person like you don't have to see me in video like i'm pretty in person i like i'm pretty on camera and in person so it's like i can't relate to that experience. Well, everyone's definition of pretty is very different, too.

So I'll let you have that because. Oh, look at that face. That's my favorite face. Did you teach him that one? Oh, yeah. You're going to suck in the cheek a little bit, clench the jaw. Well, your scary beard covers your. But you know what?

Jude does have like such a jawline. I know. I hate it. It's my biggest insecurity. I know. He's always like, oh, I want to get rid of my jawline i'm like why would you want to get rid of it exactly that's the opposite of what everyone's doing all the we ho gays exactly exactly they're getting the jaw in i know it's crazy i saw someone get a botched jaw like filler

and it was actually so sad because he did not need it at all he looked so good before and then he got fillers in his jaw. And right after, I was like, oh, it looks good. But, like, the next day and, like, the next week after, it was, like, giving, like, handsome Squidward. It was crazy. People are giving handsome Squidward in Los Angeles. Yes. And it's just not okay. It's, like, fucked up to think that, like, it's so easy to fall into that.

Especially if you just, like, have the time. That's why we need to go back to work that's why with free time comes like do i need to like literally like just be an air wand girl oh i think i need to reshape my whole my new clean girl aesthetic is a cry for help i've been like really on i've been on like a lot of like morning routine to talk and it's really just a cry for help i'm like yeah it's a cry oh i'm like you know what it is it's like it the the more that i'm more i'm into my dental hygiene the worse my brain is and it's just been like i've been really just like following these girls when you actually commit to doing the teeth whitening that's when we'll know we need to

step in i do need to commit to the teeth whitening um oil pulling is when you swish around coconut oil in your mouth the jews tell me to you know tell the girlies what they know what it is i mean i was gonna say i don't know i'm the 26 year old who's like no i'm like oh my goodness gracious there's like things you can do for your teeth and i'm like that's great i just been putting all my energy into like um copying and buying products from tiktok influencers it's so addicting to like watch them get ready in the morning for some reason. There's no way they do that shit all the time. Even if I did the exact same thing at 5 a.m., like it just isn't as like ASMR as like...

Also, I always just think like they're putting that camera there and they're like, you know what I mean? Like the behind the scenes. I try not to think of it like that. I try to think of it as just like natural and like like fun but no it's like there's no way you're doing that there's a lot i used to be dirty girl aesthetic and when i was happier and now it's just like like it literally is made to like make you feel ashamed about yourself and your routine it's like so scary i love i love like observing different um groups of people on tiktok and clean girl the clean girl one like i know i will talk through

someone's shit and i'm like there's no way you didn't film all of this in one day and just pile it up because like there's no way you're doing this shit because i cannot keep up with anything any regimen like that like i just can't do like i like the max it is is like i put on my skincare so that i don't get any more acne that is as far as i will go and like a moisturizer but i cannot do like my hair correctly every day i can't like i can't do like it's all too much also i can barely fucking floss every day and flossing there's too many fucking teeth in our mouths like i don't need all these fucking teeth like i need some of them removed so I don't have to floss between every tooth. Because I could skip out some teeth.

The teeth back there, how the fuck am I supposed to get to that? I'll let those ones rot. It doesn't matter. My dentist was trying to get me to buy little mini toothbrushes for the back of my teeth. I'm like, girl, you really think I'm going to sit there and do that? Yeah. I have stopped flossing in general because my teeth hurt when I floss. Which is probably not good disease yeah

you probably like gum disease or something yeah but it's not my gums it's like the teeth they're too close together and you also just eat like um like you eat probably the most acidic diet of anybody i've ever known that is literally why we're together i love acidic foods what are your favorite foods um like tomato i i love like hot cheetos i love like hot cheetos takis and then oranges are like a classic are like sizzling oh that's what i'm saying like definitely mixing all those things is so bad like when i'm high the concoction of things I gather to my corner to eat when I'm high is there's no way my stomach isn't like blowing the fuck up. Every morning. And I don't dilute.

That is very clean girl aesthetic to have like a tea. That's because he thinks it makes him high. He's like a little crazy. Literally, I take a shot of it. I take a shot of it. It gets me like buzz. Like I feel euphoric for like 15 minutes and then i do it before i eat because i'm literally like pre-diabetic or something because

like my body fails and i have to go to sleep after i eat and this for some reason makes me not tired after i eat it's crazy also i guess is that like a placebo effect or do you think it's for real i hope it's there i hope actually it doesn't really matter yeah how about that if it's working it actually doesn't even matter if it's working it's working yeah hope Actually it doesn't really matter Yeah How about that If it's working It actually doesn't even matter If it's working It's working Yeah But that's my clean girl

Maybe also because You're on such a sobriety kick Your body has no idea What any kind of alcohol Is like And like the minor percent Of alcohol in that You're like

I did have a sip The mother in there Exactly The mother is being awoken Yeah I did have a sip of My Mark Both of y'all's margaritas.

And it was delicious. I've been sober curious, mostly because I just like am THC. Like I'm a strand of THC. As you can hear from my voice. A THC molecule. And I'm like, I am a THC molecule as a human. Also like part nicotine. And like other part is like um powderized pearl powder

tell them about that you know what it is that's also what's so funny about like being an adult who does not treat my body correctly and then i put like shit like that on top of it as it's as if it's gonna undo that all i do is like kill my brain cells at least six times a week with any sort of substance whether it be like nicotine alcohol or weed and then i just like sprinkle like an air wand like powder and i'm like i do the unspeakable to my body every day it's giving like what's the point like to life if you're not having fun nitro cold brew every morning these days it has been my addiction for six months i and it is actually battery acid like

it is i googled it's like 30 more caffeine i was running on like celsius and cigarettes like my entire movie i just did for two months i i was eating that and then like a boiled egg in the morning and like i was i was set and also there was like a lot of hot dogs there so the glizzies let me eat some vegetables and like a juice but then let me go back to like smoking a thousand cigarettes and like celsius it's i mean honestly that is balance like as long as you're getting like the equal amounts of good but i don't know if i get the equal amounts of good because i get nothing yeah i get stuck on like one fixation food and then i will just eat it like over consume it that's literally how i've been recently is i'll drink like a coke and then i'll before i finish the coke i have to finish my water i like that rule and i do that with like sustenance in general where i'm like okay if i'm gonna eat mcdonald's like i also have

to eat mcdonald's is so fucking good um i'll have to eat something healthy like kai came over it really is it is an underrated restaurant influencers who are eating mcdonald's all that's what i'm saying everybody's lying like oh i make my overnight oats and that's all i eat like bitch fuck you suck my fucking balls like we know your postmates is going off later that day like if i were to eat what these girls eat every day, like, at night, I would have to order, like, all of Taco Bell. Exactly. To feel okay.

I need the Red 40. I need, like, something. When I was overseas for, like, two months. I need processed food. I told you. I had a Red 40. Like, I needed it. Like, I felt like there was no, like, in Hungary.

They don't have, like, any, like, artificial, like, genetically modified anything there. Which is bullshit. I think I'm just, like, from experience from, like like from experience from like being you're like from the taste of it i'm like not being satiated for months and it was just like i came back and i was like thank god like i know i need the processed foods in my diet like if i don't have them it doesn't feel right like the ketchup right yeah the ketchup in europe like i don't know why the fuck i'm saying this but it's like neon red and it i feel but it's like neon red. And it's catsup, baby.

That's not real. Catsup. I feel like it's more natural. Catsup. Is that real? Is that just like a fucking, like, is that what you really call ketchup? Catsup? Catsup? I just call it ketchup.

Let's talk about it. Oh, no cap. Sup? No cap. Sup? Oh, actually, in honor of Mental Health Awareness Month, I month i'm gonna see this is why i'm doing this i'm gonna 51 50 both of you after this i actually do need it i'm like really in my depression era but it's kind of like fun it's like a little comforting sometimes it's necessary

especially like i feel like you were just overstimulated and like really in it for so long like you need full decompression and like your deprivation tank is your couch yeah i literally look at my 11 a.m today i like let my dog out i just looked around i was like everything's pointless and this is comforting yes yeah it's nice but then like it i always i'm like oh this is bad when like it starts to like bother me that i'm doing it does that make sense like me every day every day i for years of my life i've been like i need to change i need to change everything has to change everything and it's like i can look through my journals like every day it's like i need to change something needs to change and nothing ever changes and i'm kind of just like you know maybe it's just like radical acceptance

to just accept that you will not change wow beautiful holy i mean also like it is true because all the things that i think i need to change is because like bitches on tiktok live differently and i'm like damn y'all really like the girls who go to the farmer's market every sunday it is a blessing in my life if i make it out one sunday but their job is to go to the farmer's market and make a video about it so it's like if we all need to shift our we need to go to the farmer's market and make a video about it. Exactly. So we all need to shift our work to being outside. We need to go outside. I feel like whenever I do anything for work, it's like I'm a different person. I'm like, yeah, I'm going to fucking do it.

I'm going to work like 16 hours a day. I'm going to do it. I'm going to put everything into it. And then when I'm home, it's like I don't have the motivation to walk around the block. And again, that's a lesbian red flag. Lesbians love to take a walk around the block. It is like, I'm not kidding. It has been like every time I date like a woman or a queer person it's like why don't you ever want to take a walk around

the block with me i'm like because i literally would rather die i would actually why is that such a like that is maybe there's we need to do like an analyzation of like dad behavior and because yeah because like the same oh i can make that i can make thatzation of like dad behavior and lesbian it's the same um because yeah because like the same oh i can make that i can make that at home that's dad behavior and i feel like that's a big lesbian thing is like i can make that for you like don't buy it i can make it for you i'm not lying to you like my the starbucks is like my most shameful red flag because you would think that i am like the i've been i'm a convicted felon for like drinking starbucks with lesbians because they're addicted to like really cool like coffee shops

and like black coffee with no sugar or milk and I'm like it honestly like it's like something I have to like come out and say that I drink Starbucks do you ever fake it

do you ever like try to push yourself through a block I fake all the time I love to fake for the first few weeks you put the Starbucks in a different cup

I'm not kidding I have it on FaceTime where I put it in a mug because I'm like I'm so embarrassed that's so weird or it's like that guy on TikTok who shows like how an alcoholic hides their alcohol it's Barbie

doing that with her coffee it's like a pile of cups and it's like just like the cold brew between all the cups honestly my most like rebellious act is to have a Starbucks in the morning as a gay person and I'm not kidding I'm like everyone's like there's so many good coffee shops I'm like I don't want that i want my comfort my 30 percent more caffeine

battery acid with a little bit of cream in it dairy dairy also there's something we said a lot of these fancy ass fucking coffee shops are so gross like a lot of their coffee is fucking nasty like it's always different every day and i like a little bit of sweet don't like it too sweet so it's like it's just it also be coming out and saying that i fucking like sugar in my coffee whoo like oh my god that's a crime right now i like i'm not ready to like give up starbucks and like sitting on my couch you're not ready to give up starbucks and start walking around the block i can't the block is crazy my dad made us do that every time we came home from a restaurant he was like let's go on a walk. And I'm like, bitch, I want to go and sleep.

And he's like, we should go on a walk around the block. It's 11 p.m. I don't want to walk around the block. Walking around the block is my worst nightmare. I literally get triggered when I hear it now. I'm just like, this is not okay. Because I like literally, it's been so many people. And it's just like, you never want to do anything I want to do, which is walk around the block.

And I'm like, yeah, then I won't do it. That's where I draw the fucking line. I don't't care i'm not walking around the block i will go on a hike i will go somewhere to walk but i'm just why would i walk around my house watching something it's like i'm watching something comes in the room let's go for a walk on the block i'm like i'm in the middle of something i'm a selfish person here that's my other red flag i'm i was gonna say i love hearing your red flags and i'll tell we'll tell you ours but like give us one more good one what's my other red flag my other red flag starbucks anti-walk around the block i walk around the block casually um i i think my red flag is that i sleep off i like you should know drew because we spent the last few nights

together i love your sleep. No, not only just that, I have like the most chaotic sleeping. Like I like am like sideways on the bed, like kicking and thrashing. Thrashing, writhing around under the sheets. You're having night terrors. I have like a running away. She screams. I do. Oh my God.

I don't scream, but I like cannot sleep. But I sleep for 12, 14 hours because I cannot sleep because I'm always just moving around. So that's my other red flag. Yeah, I guess. I wonder if like my intense like man snoring would be a red flag. I do snore. I've learned that I snore. My red flag is that I sleep in like I sleep like this.

I fall asleep like that. Yeah, he sleeps like a dead body. That's really good because I've learned that I sleep the worst sleep position that can how do you sleep it's literally the worst position you can it's like it's like with a pillow like this cranked neck like literally like 45 degree angle it is like i'm like i'm on my stomach i can't breathe my like leg is like not supported by anything it's just like i wake up every day with like shoulder pain it's just like i wake up every day like shoulder pain it's great yeah i sleep on my side like all crunched up and rolled into a little corner and then every morning like to unwrap myself it's like like it's like unwrapping like a dead person's body every morning

so that's maybe a red flag but i don't know like i haven't gotten any complaints about my snoring i've just been lucky that anybody who's sleeping next to me is usually a really heavy sleeper i don't have anybody in my life who's a light sleeper my red flag is that i banged everyone's mamas all the time that's not a red flag oh well because she was just easy she was like an easy one she was all over him the other day not anymore though he's changed yeah i'm a reformed barbie did have to fight your mom for and she did win so your mom's an op now um my red flag is definitely um that i need attention at all times and if i'm not giving that attention i will get that attention elsewhere like i won't like i won't cheat but like if like you don't give me attention i will

get the attention like so do not put me in a position where i have to go find that it's easy for you to get the attention so it's gonna happen if i'm posting a selfie it's because i'm not getting enough attention oh if you're posing selfies just know i'm single yeah it's literally it's like it's like clockwork it's like all right time to tap back in a single so i need to post a single selfie right now because i i am single and it's been a while and i have not posted many selfies yeah that's funny because you're like it's like auctioning yourself out it's like so yeah anyone have anyone i used to be about this really anxiously like i need attention all the time kind of person and now i've turned again in my villain era i have become the monster herself and i'm the person in my villain era i have become the monster

herself and i'm the person who's like detached i don't know what happened it's my villain arc something's wrong something's wrong with me i feel like also at a certain point it's just like i don't want to talk i'm a cold-hearted bitch now it happens all the time to every generation everybody just becomes cold and heartless yeah everybody gets to the point where it's beautiful it's it's like you it'll flip soon what's that a what's that like dark knight quote or whatever where it's like you live long enough to see your heroes oh yeah we need to edit you like with crazy film grain like shadows long enough to be the villain yeah so that's my other red flag.

I will get attention if I don't get it. Like if I don't get it, I will get it. Like don't even question it. Like you're done. Like don't play because the attention will get gone and the attention is needed to fuel my lifestyle. Yeah, because oh, Drew's been cheating on you with Kai, by the way. Yeah. So you're

you've been sitting across the man who's literally hitting it from the back like every night. Oh, you're topping? Yeah. I am topping. I'm sorry you had to find out like this. Drew! I thought I was your top.

You are my top. You're my real top. Oh, my God. You get tossed around like that every day? Who's better and better? You. What? I think we knew that answer.

You just winked at me. He did wink at me. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. I did not. Roll that. We need to talk about how hard it is to be the only straight person in the room.

It's just like in 2023, it's really hard. I go into a room, I feel alienated. Being gay is too prevalent in society now. I kind of want to be like... Sometimes I'm just like's it's just too many of us saying earlier the gay agenda it's a very real thing it's real it's fucking real and like i'm for sure accidentally promoting it all day it's literally saying like all the time consciously you are promoting i'm promoting it um but yeah so that's my other i can't think of

other red flags because i genuinely am always like i I'm a good person. Like I'm not a red flag, but I'm like, I get like very snappy when I like don't want to be around anybody anymore. Like instead of being like, instead of being like, I don't want to raise my voice sometimes. No, instead of like being like, oh, hey, like I don't want to hang out right now. I'll just like hang out and then be a fucking bitch for like three hours until the person is like, should we like not be chilling right now? And I'm like, yes. You're god like or actually i turn it on them i'm like oh so you don't want to be around me i'm like just too i love i'm a sassy girl i love being sassy i i think it keeps it

spicy yeah someone needs to do it someone does need to do it i i'm the sassy one usually oh i've said it once before i think now it's probably more like 35 000 people have jacked off to me i just don't people don't believe me i haven't but i publicly stated that i thought like at least 32 000 people have jerked off to me and everyone was like bodying me in the comments yeah like there's not a chance jerking off to like particularly do you think there's like one? The image of me, like the imagination. Like that particular image,

like is there like a clip or like a photo that you think? I think it's just my personality. I just give personality. I think you hear his voice, like erotica. Maybe, but like you're leaning too much

into the idea that people have that kind of imagination and like, it's just like at this point, like, or maybe someone's deep faked you onto some action. No, I haven't been deep faked one and i haven't gotten a cum tribute too and i still haven't

gotten a cum tribute which is fucking insane oh no we got a cum tribute when someone prints out a photo of you comes on in and yeah okay yeah i just had to like need that i need that i said that's my red flag one of my red flags is no cum tribute um The other one is just like a clean person. Like I just like clean. I could tell like. I could see myself arguing in a relationship with Drew over like things being moved. Oh, I.

He's like a big, like if you leave something in your spot and he doesn't like the spot, he'll make a new spot. My red flag is a mess. Okay, another, I'm a walking red flag. It's like actually just, it's dawned on me that I, yes, I have a juicy ass, but that is just not enough. Per. This isn't enough to carry over. It really isn't.

See, the problem is like when I look at you in your lifestyle, I'm like, oh, you're perfect in my eyes. Thank you so much. But that's also like, then I'm like, I don't, I wouldn't see like the problems in dating you. But I think that's because we also get along so well. Like all three of us get along so well. Because I look at my friends all the time. I'm like, damn, what would make you bad in a relationship? Like it's kind of hard to tell until that person says those things.

I date people who are like a bit older than me and they have like their life like semi together. Like in a way that's like, I have my life together in a lot of ways. And then I have it like, I like live like a frat bro sometimes like I'm smoking weed

I'm drinking Celsius I'm like eating like Erewhon fake sugar snacks like for lunch and dinner which I did yesterday have you had the new sour ones I bought me the house

the new those little like fucking no sugar ones that are so nasty and we have to pretend like they're good and they like stick to your teeth

yes they will not get off my teeth hate it I like you know I think i'm like a catch all the time because i lie in the first few weeks i lie i should have lied i like i do lie and then because i i have the problem where i play cool girl that's a big red flag because i play cool girl where i'm like this doesn't bother me nothing bothers me it takes

so much to bother me but really like i am actually losing my fucking mind and i'm like two seconds away from buying a gun and shooting all the tires at the person I'm talking to. Because I never want them to be able to leave their house again because they're pissing me off. But I will hold all that in and, like, hold it in. And then the smallest thing ever will annoy me. And I will really harp on that thing. And I'm like, you just shouldn't have done that. And it's, like, something really stupid.

But I'm just pushing all this, like, other energy into it. But that's my big red flag. Because I play cool girl, let someone run over me too much and then i'm like i freak the fuck out over something small because i'm like i've let everything happen that's normal like i feel like cool girl you know i kind of play like absent dad a lot in my relationships i really do i'm like yeah yeah yeah that's what i want in a relationship i need someone that that's and that's why we're so compatible yeah but no i need someone that like is gone and i see maybe once a month to have sex that's why we did i also want to be next to me but i don't want to talk to

them i don't want to like do exactly exactly exactly i want you to be in my home but like i don't want to do what you like to do i feel like i'll like play the game of like doing what someone else wants to do for a while but then after all i'm like i don't want to do that like i i literally will like roll my eyes like and that's like really fun so i'll be like we should go do this and i'm like should we and yeah it's so bad at like hiding her expression on her face like if she doesn't like something you can tell immediately and then you have to be like are you sure you don't want to do that i will lie like yeah i don't know exactly i love that i feel like i love an expressive um face it's so bad though i wish

i was really good at lying i'm not good at lying but i'm good at not telling the truth but the second someone asks me like it's because i speak before i like think and then it'll come out and i'm like what i i make up facts a lot and then i believe them like uber facts you made uber effects i like totally will say something like with like and then i'll sometimes i'll take a second i'll be like that was not true like i do that all the time i'm literally like i don't know why i said that because that's not true like i don't know where that came from and i looked it up and it's not true. And that's what second I do believe it to be true.

Yeah, exactly. Exactly. I do repeat things falsely. Like, because I add words to everything I've ever heard in my life. You can't repeat a sentence to me and me not. You can't say a sentence to me and not have me repeat it back with 8 million extra words. So if you tell me a fact fact i will go and tell my friends that fact but multiplied by 800 because i'm just like i it needs to be the craziest thing they've

ever heard i love to explain things that i know nothing about like logically in my head and then be like no it's because of this and then i have no proof like no expertise i do that all the time like especially on here i like bring up something that I know nothing about that I just heard one thing about. And someone tries to indulge in the conversation with me. And I have nothing else to give because I'm not an expert. But when I do lie, which I love, I tell like truths that make me look bad. I don't know if that makes sense. Like when I'm lying to someone, like I don't know if that makes sense like when i'm lying to someone like i'm i don't really lie

anymore but when i was younger when i would lie i would tell like the truth about something else and be able to lie about what i'm hiding right now sandwich yeah yeah i mean that's what all the killers do and like well i made up love wins so you did actually. And you didn't copyright it. I didn't. Yeah. So you lost it. You missed out on a lot of pride merch and I invented the perk 30. Which fucking sucks. I love, um, that's my man.

There he goes. Oh, I'm just saying like, y'all haven't known each other that long. So I don't think you should be dating yet.'s exactly we've known each other for longer yeah we were like you know i'd like facetime him basically high school sweethearts when i would go to new york basically like a real relationship if you're facetiming someone a lot you're dating i know if i am not having sex with you there's absolutely no fucking reason i ever need to be on facetime with you like why the fuck do people facetime i facetime my mom all the time i love to facetime oh and that's weird yeah why do you i just said i facetime my mom all the time i know but i mean we were just literally

saying how it's yeah oh okay now i'm the bad guy bro bro you're the bad guy i want to be like a villain couple oh like oh that is what y'all need to do yeah oh yeah y'all should okay so you have to that should be our halloween costume i was gonna say what is harley clinton the joker we could do that we could do that we be, I could be the Skull Tate guy. What's his name? Not Andrew Tate, the freak, but the- Go away, Tate. Go away, Tate.

So we have Andrew Tate. Yeah. All of us. All of us being Andrew Tate. That's actually a little advanced. That's actually genius. Yeah, that's actually advanced. I think y'all should go public with your pseudo relationship because I'm not-

Don't call it, don't put pseudo in front of me. I mean, it's, you know. Okay. Like, whatever don't put it on you know okay like whatever you could just you know i guess classy you could keep it classy y'all could go public and then like you know how like everybody gets in trouble publicly when they're in a relationship because they get caught cheating y'all should just cheat on each other but then we go into a smoothie squad after and then we like make it up and then I become a squatter in your house. Oh, that's good. I mean, I don't think she was opening the door to that.

No, it was more like smoothies. I just thought I would throw it out there. Yeah, I mean, it's... I am homeless. Yeah, you don't live here. So that's why you're dating her? He's dating you for a lot of people. I was going to say.

A lot of people do that shit again new york coded yeah that was very sneaky thank you you just don't do it like proudly in front of the camera no it's embarrassing he hits that puff bar it's so embarrassing and disgusting and i hate it so much but june 14th my mother's birthday i'm quitting mark my words genuinely this time for real we'll see wow i mean i'm terrified of quitting cigarettes because i feel like it's like the only like thing i look forward to you need a vice like yeah i genuinely believe why can't my vice be like preaching true true why can't it be like collecting like preaching a vice i mean that's

literally real though why can't my vice be like making homemade like stocks and like freezing them in my fridge for a rainy day i saw this video because that's just not fun yeah some people derive a lot of purpose from that i saw this video of this preacher at church um like past like literally at church she's the preacher and she goes, there's 21 of you in this room right now. This is the prophecy. This is what the Lord is saying. You each have to give $1,000. We need $21,000 and there's 21 of you in here.

And if you think it's you, it is. Oh, she was asking for $1,000 from each person? Yes, it's crazy. And I was like, oh, wow. I'm about to start doing that. I know. There's 21 of you. And that brings it back to scamming.

Exactly. The church is a, there's 21 of you. And that brings it back to scamming. Exactly. The church is a scam. Is that? I feel like we're definitely running low on people who make things. People don't make anything anymore. People just make, like, songs. People make songs, like, on their iPhone. People make music, less music,

more physical things. We need more furniture. Like, why aren't people making, why are people making like chairs my dream in life is to dictate a furniture maker i just it's like literally my dream in life like a hot lesbian furniture maker 40 years old we can find that or actually i don't know if the 40 year old aspect is going to come from the viewership of this but there has to be like a sexy lesbian i'm not really seeking like love from this podcast right now because I'm really full of it right now. Have we been recording?

Yeah, we have been. Shit. Well, Barbie was just saying she's full of love from you. I was taking a piss. You didn't wash your hands. And did you say anything quietly to yourselves in case anyone was listening? Oh, yeah. I like shouted it like you said earlier.

Yeah. I said, if you're listening to me pee right now, you're a bitch. Exactly. Oh, you got him. That's a now, you're a bitch. Exactly. Oh, you got him. That's a good one. That's a good one. Well, the thing is, I do put a mic and a camera up there.

Down there. Yeah, but for myself, just to see my own piss patterns. And the shower. Just keep track. If you shower in our house, we just have cameras in there, but it's literally just security camera.

Yeah, it's just for safety. Yeah. But yeah, we need more people making things. Make like, everybody wants to make music. Everybody wants to make art need more people making things make like everybody wants to make music everybody wants to make art everybody wants to make things okay i was just saying my dream is to date a furniture maker i don't know what he's claiming i want to design the furniture because i'm not really an ideas kind of guy yeah so you design it and then they make it did you really make this yeah wait it's so cute wait i know i do make things maybe we should just have children yeah we'll have tinkering creative how do you make this like what's it made out of 3d printer that's a lot of technology yeah i'm kind of a genius

that is like actually genius coded like i don't know anything about a 3d machine i know about it through like you know rumblings. I'm pretty impressive. I love it. I think Barbie was thinking more like things she can use because I don't think that's like... I actually do love a little tchotchke. A little trinket.

A little trinket. But can you build a couch? Yes, hello. I'm sitting on it right now. i built this with my bare hands can you put can you install marble countertops to any place absolutely not i think you could watch a youtube video and i could figure it out for sure but i'm just not strong enough people who do that god bless i think you are strong. You're putting it down, baby. You're putting it down. They're listening. This is weird for me.

You're putting it down. We have just been going at it. Banging. You can only do so much in three days. Pegging. Hello. Hello. Pegging. Just like, duh. Hello. Hello.

Pegging. Role play. Lots of role play. Disney, like, bounding role play. We still have not figured out what we're gonna be.

Woody and Jesse. And I guess I'll be the horse or something. The horse. Give us a good nay. I'm not doing that. i would love to hear a name that was the craziest bullying i've ever experienced in my life drew asking me to give a nay

no i can't that's just too much it's too embarrassing but maybe while we're there if you guys get me in the mood true nice true why don't we just like try to squash this all together and I could just join but I don't want to be around you. I'll just stick with Barclay. Polly? Yeah. And we kind of look like

we could be like related a little bit so that's like even more enticing to this generation. The sisters and then the guy who's just like kind of around. I'm down for a Polly vibe. Always have been,

always will be. I'm open to that. Yeah, but I don't want open. If I'm going to join it has to be like this is it yeah um you know sister wives style oh sister wives could be good but you guys already have like a strong bond you guys live together like i'm just like kind of like the third we'll just move into your place yeah i got a lot of animals um i'll take over cowboy's space i know cowboy's cute

but he's just i have so many animals dude i'm like i love all of your critters they're all yeah they're all crawling everywhere yeah i said my bathroom like my cat just like unroll like a whole toilet paper roll undid all of it and it's just on the floor and i'm sitting i'm sitting looking at it taking pictures i won't fix it i was taking pictures to send my friends but i'm not going to if there's no one witnessing me then i'll do nothing there's like if there's nothing no one coming over i will not do anything that's how i am yeah i feel like i'm the same i don't exist literally before you came over we picked up because we were like this shit's fucking crazy so thank you we picked up to impress for you i do that when you guys come over too i'm like yeah yeah you gotta just like i feel like anytime

someone's coming over you have to just like kick certain things under certain things. And it's like, I'm not a dirty person, but I'm a mess. Like, I just like throw things on the ground. Yeah, I wouldn't consider I've never been in your home and felt like it was dirty. Yeah, never. I don't think you're like as messy as you think. But everybody thinks they're messier. Different standard.

Yeah. They want to walk on the block. They want everything clean, organized. You know, so to me, I'm like a failure. Like, I'm not drinking black coffee from like a local coffee shop. I am, you know, giving capitalist, like, pig

drinking my Starbucks cold brew. You're getting your stars in. Do you have the app? The reward point? I actually don't. That's crazy. But can I confess something? This is probably like the most like stupid like LA thing I do is I like Postmates a single Starbucks almost every morning. Is that ridiculous?

I actually can't say anything about that because I was in an era where I was Postmating a coffee and avocado toast from Go Get Em Tiger every morning. Crazy, man. Sometimes you just need it. I have an espresso machine and I just cannot. The past six months, I'm telling you, it's been six months of me literally just. I've been really into my American brands of fast food. I've been really into myana era of just being like

so normcore that i am going to have the starbucks in the morning i know that's where we're going we're literally backtracking everybody wanted their life to be so fucking spectacular for like the tiktoks and the videos and all this shit and we're just realizing that's over consumption and we don't need that and what we need to do is give our body that food it wants exactly no literally it's actually crazy though that we haven't spoken about lana once this entire podcast until just then when you brought up brazil i was almost like oh i really wanted to go to brazil because she was playing first concert in four years i know and when i was in brazil everyone's like are you coming back for like lana concert I'm like I fucking wish I would have

I was watching it and there was a big like zoom in of these fans just like crying I was like me every time I was like me I know

imagine having that kind of footage of yourself I don't know if I need that footage of myself it's crazy how much bigger she's gotten even in like the last year

like she was huge like don't get me wrong like she was like she evolved pop star but like she was huge like don't get me wrong like she was like she evolved star but like she's having her moment right now she contains multitudes as she tweeted one she really does she like every era is different i think we can end it because we literally have so much there was a period where the camera died for 15 minutes um sorry um kai just like obviously isn't doing his fucking job like why yeah he's on that damn

phone there's a lot going on but he's on his phone at work right now kai's drunken on his phone at work right now he's always and it's like 2 p.m 3 p.m now yeah yeah you're not yeah when you're 30 it's like yeah i guess when once we get there we'll know but we're just like so far from that we're just like so young and like fragile and petite like i don't know oh my god i'm like a little girl like i don't know you know what i mean like i have no idea we do have a tradition which i'm sure you know of on some you can say some i'll start go ahead go ahead okay um placebo syndrome by parliament i heard this in uh escuela when we were there and i had to go ask the girl for this song yeah things in life by dennis brown blue moon by elvis presley it's

those two songs are in a movie that i watched like two years ago and i cannot remember the movie but it's like about people riding a train and there's like a leather jacket that's really iconic in it but i that's all i can remember about riding a. Riding a train? Is it like a couple? Yeah. Is it the before with Ethan Hawke and that French girl? It might be. It might be. Is it- Before movies? Before Sunset, whatever they're called.

It might actually be like Sunrise, Sunset. I think it might be. Yeah, with the French girl. I don't see it. I don't know. Sorry, I just got confused because my mom does not speak english but she said okay it was just to greet you that was her reply to me at the door of course i said because she called me i said one uh one second i'm working and then in english back i didn't send my message in english

it was in spanish and she goes okay it was just to greet you. So she's being kidnapped. The killer is texting me from my mom's phone right now. Do you have like a little word that if anything happens, have you seen those like fake like calls where it comes from like a contact of yours? Yes. I have your sister. I would fall for that.

That's a scream I would fall for. Yeah, I would fully fall for it. Once you like say my family's in danger, I'm like, I knew they would get kidnapped. Because I'm literally going to do that to you. Yeah, we do. I do prank call. I'm not very good at it, but I love love oh wait i forgot about that prank calling that was like our first like bonding yeah we prank call some incredible people yeah we'll we'll get into that this week yeah literally dude i know it's such a bad habit we use like all of our friends like that's the only thing we use like our like famous friends

for is for prank calling like yeah i don't think me and drew are people who will like get on a platform and be like so i'm friends with so and so but what we will do is corner you or anybody else who has contacts with like like i think it's famous people never answer their fucking phone i know it's really annoying i'm like grow up it's like once you start getting down the tier list then they start answering that's like almost even better it's almost even better I like it when it's just like a person you know that's grinding

yeah I know someone who's still doing it I forgot who it was but it was a girl and I called her and I was like I'm driving around your neighborhood and there was a baby on your roof i i do remember yeah literally and i was like oh there's like a baby crawling around your roof and then did she call back and she was like no no you just got her on the phone for so long yeah that's what it was like because it was so confusing but we gotta get back together

and do prank calls and maybe let's just call like random places. I think they'll answer. That's the best is to call Taco Bell and say someone is stuck in the bell. I love saying... We have Drake. Yes. It like really is like... Oh, I'll just say that one.

We have Aubrey Graham. We love, like me and Drew love calling Zach Bia and telling him we have Drake. We'll be like, we have Aubrey Graham. Give us $1,000. And each time it has been linked back to us. So I think at this point, he doesn't answer. And then we leave the voicemail.

We almost get no reply at this point. It's really crazy. It's like, oh, it's my monthly we have Drake. Be part of the bit. I know. Where's all the fun and laughter? Let it go. Just have some fun.

Yeah. Let go of the ego. That's what I've always been saying. That's why we fun and laughter? Let it go. Just have some fun. Yeah. Let go of the ego, you know? That's what I've always been saying. That's why we're different. Like, our ego is dead, you know? Like, we're just like, we're real people. I did a bunch of hallucinogens when I was 16. The ego death was real.

Yeah, very real. Okay. Well, do you want to do your media? Yeah, I'm not going to say music because my music taste is like fucking awful repetitive. But I've been watching a lot of TV. So I'll say this. I've been watching the other two. Fantastic.

The new season is so fun. I watched the first episode because you said to watch it. I think it's so funny. Obviously, it can. Yeah, it's great. I think everyone is really good at it. I watched Succession last night. Are you guys into Succession?

I have been letting the season collect so i can binge it all in two days is it not a thing that like i when i first started watching succession i accidentally started watching like a different episode of a different season i didn't know because that's how hard it is to follow but it's so good um what else i've been watching is this season the newest season over yeah like the whole show's done yesterday was the finale heartbreaking okay so i get to re-watch the whole season um what else did i watch um well this is in new orleans i was doing a horror movie so i just almost specifically watched like spongebob and like i watched the hotel hotel transylvania one two and three oh they're good and eat i've been really not into like narratives

right now um i'm really into like lobotomy um shows so and movies so hotel transylvania for sure one and three two is kind of whatever um what else you about transylvania like yeah like two was like whatever one and three is like a masterpiece um what else yeah that's spongebob i really do recommend a rewatch of every single spongebob episode yeah i need to tap in because every time i go to watch i start at the new season and i just like don't want to watch new episodes i'm like no and like yeah yeah up and out it's really good it's like i really needed something that made me think nothing and it's perfect okay i need to tap back into that because yeah i've just been watching like i've been back on my murder

documentary shit and i'm like okay i need to, mix it up because this is all I watch. And now I'm getting back to thinking that everybody is the killer and I can't keep calling people the killer. The killer is, like, here. The killer. Win T. Williams. I mean, the killer is in this room right now. I mean, yeah, right? He's been here the whole time.

Mine is, it's you, Kai. Come on. Like, duh. Keep those teardrops from falling by natalie bergman which is like all i do on this podcast is complain about people who make new music that sounds old but that song got me i thought it was an old song but now when i listen to it the ending of it is so obviously a new song trying to be old but it still gets away with it because it was a really good song um but then all my other stuff is like repetition i've been thinking of listening to the album all

things must pass by george harrison which i know is a beetle and like that's the worst thing to happen to me but i already said that and i'll like let the beetles no yeah i went to like um like yeah like i sure yeah don't put her in a position that i've already put myself in listen the beatles is a band and period i was like in choir like as a kid it's like always saying and like i went to i was like kind of forced to go to this like broadway like beatles rendition like show and well so i can say like i'm a little bit of an expert yeah so you've got you've got your stars so yeah i think that's all you need i wouldn't say i listen to them like on like but also the music i listen to is like actually just like noises give me one one one shitty song you listen to i'm so curious

i think they're shitty but um you don't have to you don't have to i You don't have to. I'm actually just looking at like what I like. It's literally like so predictable. I love like hyper pop. Like I'm not going to lie. Oh yeah. So I can do that. I'm a big hyper pop guy.

I can, a big into hyper pop. Who's your, what do you listen to? Hyper pop. I'm like giving old head. I'm like, I don't want to know the kids listening to these. I don't know. I, I mean, I just like the classics, like Hannah Diamond, like Hannah Diamond.

Love Hannah Diamond. Damn, Hannah Diamond is such a throwback. That's so crazy. And, I mean, Sophie, of course. We love Sophie. Rest in peace. I do love Sophie. A.G. Cook. Like all of them.

A.G. Cook, yeah. Is A.G. Cook the one that makes all of it? He's like the producer. Yeah. I love A.G. Cook. He's the Charlie lot. Yeah. Charlie is the is the as we know the goat um but yeah well thank you so much for being on i can't believe i'm the only first guest

yeah and maybe the only guest ever okay i wow well i just like to thank everyone for listening you're so special to us you're special to me and now we get to go have a little snack because i think i'm the way i just held your hand so out of control oh it's out of control it's like help yeah well thank you so much for being on actually also i just like usually we just say bye and we're like all right that's it bye but now we have a guest i'm like there should be some music like we'll just fade in music and we'll just like keep talking and like let us fade out you know oh my god wait hold on Bye.