Emergency Intercom - Drew Is Cheating On Enya

Episode Date: November 18, 2022

Drew admits to cheating on Enya. The two discuss their upcoming religious arc and how Drew’s family is the one cooling white people Thanksgiving food. Emergency Intercom is sponsored by Better Help. Learn more and save 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/intercom Right now, get up to 55% off your subscription when you go to BABBEL.com/EMERGENCY That’s BABBEL.com/EMERGENCY for up to 55% off your subscription. Babbel—Language for life. Follow Enya on Insta: @EnyaUmanzor Follow Drew on Insta: @DrewPhillips09 To listen to the podcast on YouTube: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercomPodYT Don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercom If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercom Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey Spotify, this is Javi. My biggest passion is music. And it's not just sounds and instruments. It's more than that to me. It's a world full of harmonies with chillers. From streaming to shopping, it's on Prime. get one last hit of that elf bar you bastard bitch see the thing about these fucking elf bars is they're as sweet as candy so it's crazy because like i can eliminate candy from my diet now because of the amount of glucose

that they use in this it basically coats my mouth in sugar so it simulates me eating gummies um you're sweet as candy so i don't have to um welcome to this episode of emergency back to emergency intercom um you're sweet as candy so I don't have to eat any sweets anymore now what if I slapped the shit out of you now what if I did that sorry I got a text message I'm gonna respond to it real quick

immediately like off the bat using your phone because you're a fucking screenager a screenager you can't be called a screenager once you turn 25 which is very soon though oh my god that is not true

at all um should we talk about how last night I cried watching a video of Kylie and Kris Jenner

oh yeah yeah so we were watching um Kris and Kylie cooking pasta which was like I need to be was like, I need to hang out with them. I really need to like just be a fly on the wall. I need to be Frederick and like buzzing around and just like her house fly. That's like a reference in the video.

Like if you're a part of the lore, you get it. But yeah, they just look like they have a good time, like they have fun. And halfway through the video, actually near the end of the video. Also, to clarify, I was like high as fuck. Yeah, and you were stoned. I've been back on like my getting high because since we've come back from Japan, I've realized we don't do anything. And I was like, oh my God, I need to do something.

So I feel like i need to fill the void with something like 20 something year old who's like doing something yeah so i've been getting high as bones i've been in self-destruct mode as well i've been eating snacks will insert a photo pizza whatever i can get my grubby little fucking hands on at 3 a.m i will sit in my bed and eat it and i didn didn't become self-aware to it until last night or yesterday or two days ago, whatever. Like two nights ago. Yeah. And I was like, oh, my God.

Like, I actually need to fucking chill because this is, like, dangerous what I'm doing here. Like a slippery slope. That girl is so dangerous. Because I will finish an entire bag of hot Cheetos, a family- size bag of cheese ruffles which when i i'm like so off topic right now but i have to get this out but like when i got covid the only thing that like shifted the flavor is back to normal but cheddar cheese ruffles were my favorite chips and because of covid they started tasting like I was eating like blood and copper. Yes, I am a cannibal.

Like let's get over that. Let's move on. But yeah, just like, I will eat so much sweets, like in a crazy way. It is insane. Like I think I'm somebody who can like really like chow down on snacks. But compared to Drew, it's literally, like, it is incomparable.

Like, it is insane. This motherfucker could go in. But it's literally because you don't eat other meals. Like, it's because. Okay, like, now you do. But, like, for the most part, like, when your body is like, oh, I, like, need food. If that's what's in front of you, you'll literally just grab all of it and go to your room. And I go to the room and I'm like, can I get something? And it's like, I hit your hand. Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's completely empty. No, the thing the problem is, is I eat two meals a day while I'm awake. And then I sleep, but I've been staying up till 4am. And now my body craves a third meal because we're so bored and we need the energy to stay up that late so and we don't have really any food in the house so my third meal becomes chips and sweets we're just not at the at the point in adulthood which i think like it's

like the joke like um all like gen z knows how to do is like eat hot cheetos and lie like that like we have to talk about the reality. We have to talk about how like real that is. Like charge your phone, be bisexual, eat hot chips and lie. Yeah, it's true. So real because like that was the prophecy. Specifically on like eat hot Cheetos, because like that's literally just referencing the fact that like I don't know anyone my age and maybe it's because the field we're in but i actually even older than me i don't know many people who like are constantly making meals at home like i just don't know anybody who does that i do not know

and like i i there was a brief moment in time where like that was kind of my vibe and that's why i was really into the covet era um but then i was like oh my god there's like life to live and mcdonald's yeah like ordering mcdonald's is so much easier than cooking although ordering mcdonald's is literally so expensive like that's another thing that i've been thinking about like it's insane like i ordered that actually i ordered food for me and josh and it was 37 dollars that is crazy let that sink in that is granted i'm just like awesome and i leave a good tip but would have been 15 bucks yeah yeah if i just went say hello to tim selects tim's everyday value menu enjoy the new spinach and feta savory egg pastry or our roasted red pepper and swiss pinwheel starting at only 2.99 plus tax try one or try our full tim selects lineup terms apply prices

may vary at participating restaurants in can. It's time for Tim's. But anyways, we got way off topic, but Inya sobbed at this video of Kylie Jenner and Kris. Is it Jenner? I wish I was like,

like still high because it was like the funniest, like it genuinely was because I'm just at the point where like I am kind of testing like my highness now.

Like I don't know if you realize like when we got home from the gym, usually I will eat and then get high because I like know I'm like there has to be stuff in my stomach. But this time I was like, you know what? I'm saying no to a weed brand deal and like literally. But it's different because I'm like talking about my own volition. I'm not I'm not likeition. I'm not like. Selling your weed. I'm not selling you this idea. But I mean like whatever.

You do you. But. Don't smoke weed unless you're 25. Yeah. Or else you'll be like us. Your brain chemistry. I've been saying it. Don't do drugs until you're 25.

Oh, I just fucking. I have never like twisted my own wrist so crazy and i just twisted the fuck out of it but my whole thing recently is like i like want to get so high that i'm like scared and i just have to go to sleep like that's kind of like where i've been pushing myself because like i think when i was younger and i would get too high i would freak the fuck out because i was like where where am i gonna go but now especially because we've lived here so long i'm like i'm home like it's not like i need to go see my parents i'm freaking out like no one's real it's literally like bitch i'm going to my bed like it's like that simple um so like i got home from the gym and i immediately like had an edible because i was like i just want to see what happens if i eat after and i felt fine like i was

having the time of my life but then this kylie jenner looks directly into the lens of the camera and spreads parmesan cheese propaganda it was a pp parmesan propaganda it was a psychological operation if I've ever seen one did you know that parmesan is delicious and nutritious 30 grams contains up to 50% of your daily calcium intake. That is crazy. This is my theory. I will play the clip right now. But my theory is that all of the Parmesan cheese companies, like Big Parma. Oh, my God. That was such a fucking bar.

That was a bar. Big Parma. All got together. Also, I'm watching how you move your hands thinking about like the person who was you is on halloween it was like literally like the big parma um they all got together raised i'm saying 5 to 15 million dollars to give to kylie jenner to spread this parmesan cheese propaganda to put it into our brains that parmesan cheese is good and that's the thing is like it's very real like you can't tell me that wasn't a psychological operation

the thing is like obviously as we're saying this kylie we love you and like oh yeah you're the girl like we still want to hang out we're like joking but like i think what it was is like we were talking about it and like it definitely was like either fed to her or she said it and they didn't get a good shot of it so they were like oh say that again because we we didn't have your face and camera she was trying to be funny we can't get like i really like we can't decipher it but like i'll just play like actually we'll just have it play over right now oh we already had a play oh yeah well we'll have it play again two more times because now we're being paid to play it exactly um but yeah. But yeah, that was like, first of all, dude, I literally started crying. I wish I took a picture of you.

I was like, oh my God, we are literally like, you know what's happening? It's like, we've gone too far from dairy and like big dairy brands are like, no, we're done. No more oat milk. No more fake Parmesan. Like no more nothing. Oh, but that's real though. No more milk in general.

Stop drinking milk. Stop drinking oat milk. All of it. It's over. We're more milk in general stop drinking milk stop drinking oat milk all of it it's over we're past milk in general exactly just have water with your cereal be normal the like gum in oat milk propaganda that was going around that was like the gums and i literally fell for it i was like oh what like i don't even know what the fuck that means like and when i was like oh my god i'm consuming gum i can literally like i'm drinking oils you can't say that because I literally was like, dude, you know when you swallow gum and it gets stuck in your fucking lungs? That's what's happening to me.

The craziest thing about me is that I'll sit here and be like, stop drinking milk. Stop eating fillers and microplastics. When I sit in bed at 3 a.m. like this, it's bad. It's not okay. I'm a hypocriteite we all do what we want and that's okay like you do you give your body what your body craves and sometimes your body craves fillers and microplastics and that's okay because that wasn't up to us for our bodies to want that we were given that and now it's you know what microplastics are a bit yummy. We can admit that. They taste good. And like we've all seen the picture of the McCormick microplastic seasoning going around.

And I want that. I'm not going to lie. I want it. Oils and microplastics. Spyro like his belly is filled. That's what I want to look like. I want like a big belly. Like I want like, I want like a belly. Well, start drinking beer.

I know, I need to. Literally like our relationship has gotten to the point where it's like, don't make me drink alone. Like that's literally how I feel when I drink around you. I'm like, don't make me drink alone. And I'm like, babes, it will become like a really, really gnarly problem. Like if I don't handle it now. So it's just like. I remember in Japan when you got mad at us

because like okay also at this point we know drew doesn't drink like we don't even like really like okay yeah y'all be the judge y'all be the judge we don't step into this but me and josie and a bunch of our friends were at dinner in japan and like i was i i didn't like i don't know i was just drinking like every fucking night there because like it just felt right um drinking every night for two weeks straight should never feel right you psycho

okay also when I say drinking every night like I don't mean like I'm like getting fucked up like I'm just like having a drink or two at dinner every night which is whatever man Like, I'm, like, getting fucked up. Like, I'm just, like, having a drink or two at dinner every night. Yeah. Which is just... Whatever, man.

Whatever. Whatever. But Josie had come into the restaurant. I was sitting at a different table. And also, the thing was, a lot of the drinks that I was getting were really watered down. So, I genuinely wasn't getting even buzzed every night. Like, it was rare that I was at a restaurant. I was like, oh, my God.

This, like, actually has fucking alcohol in it. I'm going to get drunk right now. But that was a restaurant where like the alcohol was being served. Like it wasn't like a diluted drink. They were serving me alcohol. So I had a drink and I was like, Josie, get one. Okay. Yeah.

That is what we're talking about. Like the the thing is i saw your brain like trying to figure out what to interrupt me with computing computing um but whatever i had josie have one me and josie had two and then like off two we were just like feeling ourselves to like an insane level yeah or actually i think i got three deep like i got three in which you've heard me say before two three is like my like my drink of my limit not my limit but like that's just where i like to go at this point but whatever we were just like having a fucking blast and we were literally in like a goofy little silly mood and then we like got out of the restaurant and josie like was wearing the craziest fit ever and grabbed my hand it was like there was a 7-eleven like next door like

down the block and he was like let's go get these little peach drinks which we'll insert a photo of if you see this you have to get it they're so good but they're really low in alcohol it's mainly a fucking soda but it's literally it just tastes really good yeah you can't taste the alcohol it's actually really dangerous it's what liquorice should taste like like it's white claw yeah oh white claw is beat by that oh my god i'm talking so much about substance this episode like this is like yeah whatever but the fucking josie grabs me and we like run down and it actually i will say it was a moment where i was like this is so sweet sweet. And on my deathbed, I'll think of this moment of like Josie grabbing me and us running to like 7-Eleven. Not for me.

Because I was left out of the cute moment. I was standing there. I was with y'all. And y'all grabbed each other and ran away from me. And I was left alone. And it was so hurtful. I was like, wow, these are like my two best friends literally in the entire world. Like I would kill for them. And they just grabbed each other and ran. And in that moment, I was like, wow, damn, I really don't mean shit to anybody. Like I am just this like, like figment. I don't exist. Like maybe it's like I'm around for like comedy relief because I have like Jester's privilege, like whatever. Like it's like an interesting like dynamic but in that moment

i was like wow like i really see where i stand in the dynamic and where he stands is somebody who we know doesn't want to partake in alcohol anymore so we don't like really like think to like grab and be like let's go run to 7-eleven and buy alcohol you know i love snacks and gummies okay true and they do have okay but howmies at 7-Eleven. How many times did I get you a snack or gummy on my way home? You did get me gummies a few times. You kept me filled and fed. Yeah, I was filling your belly

and I was getting you little knickknacks and treats along the way. It was really sweet. And then I got you a knickknack. I stole a knickknack from you. What'd you get? The PSP. Oh, no, no no i forgot i got you that but the michael jackson cd oh yeah you did you did i haven't listened to it yet because i was gonna

go play it in the morning the other day when i was still waking up at 6 a.m and i was like i cannot blast off the wall right now at 6 a.m um but yeah i did steal a psp from drew that wasn't like he thought he was gonna get himself two PSPs on his collector's shit. But I literally in a Starbucks just took it. And he was like, I was like, I'll pay you back for it. And then like, I was like, no, you're fucking not. And I was like, yeah, I'm not. I'm literally not going to pay me back for that, which is OK.

And then I'm sitting here modding the fuck out of it, even though you run away from me. It's just interesting. You're doing the man's job in the relationship. Yeah. You're're doing the work you're sitting at the computer and you're doing the work instead of going to war i'm modding psps like let's talk about my psp so i kind of ape escape for free like that's an interesting dynamic um also before we like i feel like we're already pretty deep into the episode i just didn't know how to transition into this but i do want to bring up like the comments about what i said in the last episode i i think i just repeated myself like twice but whatever um i do want to make comment on it like i did see that clip i did see everybody's like take on it and i do fully understand and it is a point of like shame and embarrassment for me like that clip.

I'm like having a hard time wording like I've been thinking about what I was going to say like for since the moment I saw it, but I just I genuinely am like so sorry and upset to think that I'd like upset and hurt anyone's feelings by being so dismissive and being so ignorant and arrogant in that moment. I genuinely was just projecting this insecurity I have about those kind of topics and my place in those topics. And I genuinely will. I mean, both of us have been thinking about it a lot the past week, and we will do a better job at speaking on those things. And I do.

I am happy for the fact that, like like you guys are very open to like holding us accountable and i don't know like i i did i mean i was like staring at my phone and like watching the way it was being spoken about and i do think i could take a lot from it because as much as i think the both of us do feel like we are constantly growing and trying to like evolve it was a good moment to kind of like step back and be like okay we're flying yeah there's still things we have to work on um but yeah i didn't want that to go like under i didn't want to like push that under the rug because i don't want anybody to think that like that's genuinely how specifically i feel about that it was a very odd slip of like it it was projecting insecurity and i am like shameful for that and i will do better like on that topic or anything that's sensitive yeah

and then um back to poop and in the middle of like oh yeah and then my like so i've been shitting a lot this week no i was just gonna read um this idea that came into my head a couple days ago and it's still becoming truer and truer to this day. Like the more I go on the internet. Like I don't know what you're going to say. But it's actually crazy how every like exposing cheater video is in the car. I hate you so much.

Literally why is every exposing cheater video in the car? Like it makes no sense. Like look up exposing cheater compilation. And it's always in the car and it's always the boyfriend sitting in the passenger seat for some reason because the man should be driving but that's another question like that's another topic but like why is it always in the car because americans are car driven country it's fucked up and we need to get rid of the cars and we need we have been brainwashed into thinking that we fucked up and we need to get rid of the cars and we need to shrink the population. We have been brainwashed

into thinking that we need cars when we need more public transportation. Yes. But cars have become commodified. Big karma. You know Okay. That one wasn't as good as big karma. Big karma was really good. Big karma was really good. That is gonna

be on my gravestone because that may be one of the wittiest things i've ever said in my life and the craziest thing about it is it just came to me in my brain just sitting here but big karma is really fucking bad um and i won't know it's like a taylor swift reference no we'll put like big pharma and then like but let's not but lest we forget big karma i feel like i've i guess i i can't think of many like cheating videos other than once sitting in a car so you might be on to something no i definitely why did you think that um because you saw a video of somebody yeah exactly well i saw someone like making fun of it

and i was like why did they do that in the car because like my first thought would be like opening the front door and throwing water on them or some shit i don't fucking know how relationships i would get out of the car if someone cheated on me i would literally be like okay like now what like i don't like i don't know what we're supposed to do here i'd be like literally talking i don't know i would just be like i'm hurt i guess that we were talking about this because i was like i was talking about arguments i've had with partners with drew and i was like i don't think i've said i i don't think i've said anything super crazy or done anything super crazy in my relationships like as crazy as i feel in my head like i don't do like crazy things so like i'm not like i'm never getting into an argument where like i'm fucking yelling like i don't yell, like, crazy things. So, like, I'm not, like, I'm never getting into an argument where, like, I'm fucking yelling.

Like, I don't yell. I think that's, like, really embarrassing. Although, like, I understand in the heat of the moment to, like, yell because you're, like, upset. I used to be a yeller. And then I met you. And I was like, damn, yelling is, like, embarrassing. Yeah, right? Like, it's like, ooh, like, I literally raised my voice.

But I will get very stern with my tone. So, I guess maybe like in some way like i have been told to like calm down yeah but like i don't like yell like i just like get really like and like i can answer myself up really easily like as we've all seen i can really put some scenarios into my head that like will make me upset or like whatever um and like i i just haven't yelled whatever but we were talking about this because i was like isn't it so okay who's texting you let me see your phone who's texting you i'm not giving you my phone i'm not gonna give you my fucking phone well now

you're like being like i was joking about you giving me my phone like you give me giving me the phone like i now what are you doing fine i'm cheating on you i'm cheating on you okay funny joke let me see your phone no like you i'm not gonna give you my phone because i just told you i'm cheating on you you're not allowed to see my phone i'm a cheater i'm a cheating bastard i'm cheating on you i don't care you're not seeing my phone you're not getting my phone and we're gonna like clip that because i like really don't i'm not giving it to you so give me your fucking phone no let's move on how about that oh my god you are cheating oh yeah literally look i'm cheating on you we did that in in public the other day and like we do that kind of shit as if anybody gives a fuck like there's no people give a fuck yeah people definitely like in silence they're like wait but we were doing that the other day and drew was like acting like he was cheating on

me with my sister i was like that's not funny give me your phone and then like i like got angry and walked away and i was like i'm gonna go use the bathroom and like as i was walking away he was like i literally told you i was cheating on you why are you being such a bitch like like what's the problem like but it is crazy that you've never been into an altercation in a relationship. And that's kind of why I was getting to. Because, like, if you have been in a relationship, it's so funny how intense and, like, just. It's just so crazy the arguments you will get into and the conversations you have to have being in a relationship. And then you just, like, move on.

Like, you have, like, an intense argument or relationship where you cry or whatever and then it's like well we're not gonna break up over this yeah like so what's the point of all of that yeah it's just like okay keep it pushing see that's my thing is why i would only want to see my partner once a week because like there's no room to fight at all if i think seeing your partner only once a week would open up the floor to fighting not for me i'm so laid back and chill like i let so much slide where i'm just like i could be angry about this but like bringing this up in conversation isn't going to change anything because people don't change oh my god people don't change it's the fact um well drew they do and your relationship you will see your partner grow

and change and morph into many different people drew was like literally the first argument i get into i'm just gonna break up with them like i'm not doing that you're like uh okay like we're fighting like i'm done like i'm not putting up with this shit like don't do this to me i literally can't we were so chill we were so chill why did you have to fight with me i'm so excited for drew's first relationship so i can have the moment where like damn damn my best friend is the crazy one okay damn he is crazy no i'm lit like that's the thing about me like at the end of the day that's literally's literally me. I let so much shit slide and then I'm in my room like... What's going on here?

What is it? What's going on? No, no, no. What's going on? It's like that one. It's like a TikTok tick. Like, what's going on? I don't know.

Oh. I know Crazy Rob. I know that House of Commons. I hate that one. Is that a TikTok? I mean, a Harry Potter reference? Because I cannot't know. Oh. I know Crazy Bob. I know that House of Commons. I hate that one. Is that a TikTok? I mean, a Harry Potter reference? Because I cannot. Ooh.

Okay. Wait, what? I'll just bring it up. So the craziest thing ever. Actually, I think Elon buying Twitter is the greatest thing to happen to the internet ever. Just wait. I know. It sounds crazy.

Because he's killing it and the reason why that's great is because tumblr will rise again and the craziest thing about tumblr recently is they announced that they're allowing nudity back on which is literally like so which is fucking lit down like that shit is that was like i think the genesis of who i am as a person was like tumblr porn and i'm sorry that's like gross and like whatever like but it's real like it was the genesis of you realizing that you were straight and you didn't have to have any worries exactly exactly exactly exactly seriously like a hundred percent um but yesterday i started bringing this up to india and she was like no just save that for the podcast because like this is like

me airing my shit out in a crazy way and it is like really embarrassing um so i had like three tumblr blogs i literally do not remember what they are at all i had like a goofy ass one i never posted shit yeah a goofy goofy silly one i had like an aesthetic one which is probably so embarrassing to look back on like what i thought was cool in that time and then i had a private one for the p word um horn which is insane like well no the thing like i was just liking things like and having my likes hidden see no i didn't that's the thing is i had um on my main vlog people knew what that one was and i had my likes open on that because i would reblog shit and i would like shit and i like to categorize like oh this one can live on the feed this one has to like be hidden you have to find it and one day i guess i forgot to switch accounts and i i never liked like

p word posts and for some reason i liked this one and i guess it's because I like actually I know why I like it no no because like I had found it like years before and then I lost it and I found it years later and I was like I am not going through all that trouble to find this video again so I was going to like it and I was on my main account and then like a week goes by and like I had some like really big like I call them friends now because they're literally like I like text them like weekly but like one of them texted me and was like yo like no no no no no this is how it went down so someone texted me and was like was like oh your likes are public on tumblr by the way like and I was like oh really that's interesting and then I was like

yeah I know like what like that's not that big of a deal and then i was on you now live stream and someone commented like drew like your likes are public on tumblr and i was like why is everyone saying that like that's the second time i've gotten that like yes my likes are public and then i was like yes and then i immediately no i'm like not kidding like it popped in my head what i had done and i immediately like logged off of you now and went through and like unliked that shit so fast and i was so fucking embarrassed because like i was like at that point i was straight yeah um and yeah it was just straight porn and it was just weird. But yeah, it was really, really dark.

It was a really dark moment. I was like, oh my God, I'm over. Like everything is done. Like this is fucked up. Well, I think I used to literally like reblog, but it was like soft core shit. Like it was because I'm so big. Of course you were. But that was so big on Tumblr. Like that like soft core shit like it was because i'm so big that was but that was so big on tumblr like

that like soft like sorry i'm so sore from like working out and getting like big yeah that's what happens when you work out for the first time in like months oh no not me not me that couldn't be me but yeah that was just such a big thing i remember when they announced that they were taking the p word off we're me saying the p word now like this video isn't demonetized like from the beginning but i remember when they took that off i was like it's done it's a wrap it was like vine and tumblr like everything everything dying at the same time it's done it's done like my life is over and and guess what you may be shocked that your life continues yeah because life keeps going like it really does like that's the craziest thing about life is that it just keeps going

and it will come back with p word yes yes yes um yes he has well god has smiled on me well yes he has since we're just only we're talking about the p word i just have to say this because like when i was told this i literally died laughing and i actually don't think it's that funny but i was inquiring about the s word and i was like asking questions about me in the s word and i was told i give head like i'm on a mission and like like i was like oh do you feel like i'm a really like loving partner and then they were like yeah but like you definitely like you definitely like and it was like this isn't a complaint is that a it's like a compliment it was like a compliment like but it's like fix your shit compliment like it's like you're definitely not doing certain things for the other person like you're like on a mission to get it's for you and you only that's crazy being told that i'm on a

mission well i'm coming back with that gold medal yeah and i always do that's the goal yeah for some reason my mood has completely shifted um in bad way. Right now? Yeah. I've been so unstable. Like not after that. Oh, just after you hear about me like giving. Doing S and it's not to me. It's like, what the fuck is your fucking problem? You W word.

A censor goes up now. You WS. Horse slut. Oh. No. Oh, interesting. I thought it was horse sex. But my mood has been so unstable recently.

It's like, how the fuck was I in Japan and I was still slipping into a depression? Like, that is actually crazy. And I was, like, exercising every day. We also did the math on the 20K step days we were having. We were walking 10 miles a day. I know. Like, for 14 days straight. also did the math on the 20k step days we were having we were walking 10 miles a day like for 14 days straight like actually i want to see how many miles we walked in japan because that's crazy because i um i was like oh i felt really good in japan for from walking that much like it feels

good that i was able to do that and i was like i'm just gonna like start going to the gym because you don't walk in la and i was like i'm just gonna go to the gym and like keep walking like i'd say we walked seven miles a day yeah to like reference it um and then i looked 98 miles yeah and i looked it up and saw that like we were walking an average of like seven to ten miles a day and i was like bitch in what world am i gonna be in the gym long enough to even fucking do that which i was yesterday by accident because i went too early for a class so i was just fucking picking my ass in the damn gym like i didn't have anywhere else to go i was like dying and i was like i need to go get food like i cannot work out like i can't like work out on this stomach like if i don't eat now i will collapse and die and turn into powder like i need to eat so i went and got food why the fuck am i saying this right now because you're

just letting them know what you were up to. But you talking about food reminded me that I was watching Devin's vlog. And something else that greened me out. I wasn't high, but like it genuinely freaked me out for some reason. Because I also think like since we got back from Japan, because I was so overstimulated visually, I keep having moments. But this also might be like what like being a glasses wearer is like you don't have this anymore but since you got lasik but did you ever feel when you had glasses like sometimes things would be so clear like do you know what i'm saying like

you know when you had glasses and like without you realizing it just from your day-to-day activities they kind of oiled up and fogged up oh yeah and then when you clean them you were like oh my god i'm seeing so clearly right now that i i feel like i'm seeing hd yeah i've been having that a lot since we got back from japan and like it's pushing me into like a disassociative like mood because i'll just be like walking around and then i'll like look at something like when we were at jonathan's concert i was looking at my shoe and i was like dude like it is like so hd and like real and like there's like like renders that look this real now someone just slipped lsd into your fucking glass of water at the concert and i was freaking the fuck out and like i've been having

that but one of those moments that translated into like watching like tv was our food was i was watching the vlog and like shoot they were like in the hotel and there was a bowl of fruit and devin was like oh i ate some of those for breakfast and then uh sydney was like you just like pick this up and ate it and like even their interaction on it really freaked me out because like i agreed i was like whoa you like you really can't just see fruit pick it up and eat it and then like she like picked it up and like bit into this plum and it freaked me out for some reason what the hell are you talking about yeah i'm basically talking about how i think i'm actually going fucking crazy.

Because like, why? Like, why is that the concept that like, you can just like, like fruits and vegetables are ready to eat like that? Like, why is that freaking me out recently? Like, what? Like, the fact that you can pick up an apple and just fucking bite into it. And like, there's no preparation needed to go into that. Like, and it's like, you have to go go buy it open it and reach it like that you literally like there's no packaging on

it you literally just bite it like it was made with like a god-given like package to be eaten to protect it and then you can also eat the packaging yeah it's interesting and then at the whole foods you see them cutting up apples and then putting it into plastic, which is insane. Same with oranges. They'll peel the orange for you and then put the slices of oranges in a plastic bag. Which is crazy because the best part about eating an orange is like playing with the peel and like peeling it off.

And then spraying it. And like, honestly, this is something crazy I do, but I get an orange peel and after I eat it, I rub it on my neck so I can smell it all day. That's awesome. I like peeling it and then it gets stuck under my nails and I'm like scraping the little bits. And because I bite my nails, it's like citric. But yeah, that's just where I've been the past week and a half.

That's crazy. It was like I parked and I looked out my window. I'm going to 5150 you. I parked and I looked out my window and it freaked me out because I was like, dude, like it is crazy how real everything looks right now. And I was like, that is so crazy. It's just you like your brain finally setting. You're making those connections because we're forming our final stage brains.

Yeah. Or I'm just like literally going crazy. You're losing it. I think I'm just kind of losing it. But that's okay. That's why I'm like in a position where I'm like like i just need to get so high that i'm like scared and then i'm like back to being like caveman brain i'm like nothing matters i don't care yeah or you just don't think about everything but if you think about everything everywhere everything becomes magical

and and everything the further you stray oh my religious arc is like coming really really soon because the further you stray from god and the closer you get to science the more you realize that or the deeper into science you get the more you realize that everything is unexplainable and you can't explain it truly so that is something that freaks me out like i i am a believer in science but what freaks me out is you literally like there is no like certain like conclusions with like a lot of science theory yeah and that's like really what scares me but that's also why is it like this is me making excuses in high school but i was like yeah i don't fuck with science because like i just like believe in like keeping things like unknown which is me every trump

supporter which is just me being like i don't want to read i simply don't want to read that fucking book like i'm not gonna read that book um but yeah i i i think i i think i've always been kind of religious like i've always kept it on like an agnostic tip of like i'm like there definitely is something out there but i always like reference god but i am back to watching midnight gospel oh because since i've been in like a disassociative like i don't know what's real um i'm like okay i need to call my therapist which i probably won't do because it's just like a lot i'm like therapy there's just there's just too much to catch up on right now and i'm like there's too much and catch up on. And there's nothing to catch up on. One of the reasons why I can't go to therapy now is because like I'm too far gone.

Like there's too much shit going on in my life for me to have to explain to them my entire life. And then opening that back up is just like too much. But you know what's nice about it is like you kind of realize that those things not that those things don't matter but once you get into therapy session that's when like the things that are actually bothering you become like very clear because i feel like in a day-to-day you may like pinpoint certain feelings to these like super huge things that or that feel really big to you but then once you sit in that room and you start talking it's like oh that other thing wasn't even like in my mind. It was it was this like really simple fix that I just like needed. So like I am just making excuse. Really, I'm just fucking lazy.

Like I'm literally just in my lazy fucking loser arc where I want to like sit down, be on iPad, read book for five minutes, get back on iPad, get on TV, get on Fortnite, get high, go to sleep. Yeah, that is like the ultimate vibe. How can you be depressed when you have zaza and an iphone like i really don't get it like literally like it's it's a cure i felt like apple wait apple cured depression yeah apple brought us depression to our face um but what were you saying i don't remember it was it was there oh say one thing you remember from what you were saying and i will remember oh i was just talking about um going to therapy

and like how no previous ma'am you're asking a lot of me right now i don't remember three minutes ago oh but um something i did just think about is I need to stop. I want that conversation to be finished so bad because we never finished anything and we were so close to finishing it. Really think of your hardest like to what you were thinking about. Hold on. I really need this for me. Like I really need it bad. We were talking about, oh, like nothing is feeling real for you.

So you start doing these. bad we were talking about oh like nothing is feeling real for you so you oh and i'm saying what i need to do is like i've been watching midnight gospel because when i was feeling like this it like grounded me and like i've been i listened to like a lot of like duncan trostle because he has really good like psychologists talking about being religious yeah he has a lot of good like psychologists and like religious figures and just like just all these people who have like really good insight and wisdom who have like really studied like the idea of like self and self-awareness. Yeah, and it's not like this like really like outward. It's not like a challenge of like, oh, how to make sure you're perceived this way as much as it is. Like, how can you find the things in life that make you feel comfortable make you feel whole make you feel grounded

etc but i've been i was like watching that while i was walking on the in the gym like i was like watching a few episodes i was like dude this is such a good fucking show and like i'm in love with duncan trussell and then like oh duncan trussell is bad as fuck i know i need like an edit like you know the what's it called like the like the like uh the really cap cut like fast edits like someone needs to make one of like duncan trussell please make that make that dream come true please you saying it like tapping your chin um but yeah i was saying what i need to do is go to therapy but i probably won't do that for like another two weeks because also i'm just busy with holidays so that's not

the question but i need to stop referencing um being flashbanged in casual conversations with strangers as if that makes sense people don't get it because there's so much shit that i say to my trainer who if you're watching this i'm sorry like. But you have, like, there are people who literally have no sense of humor and don't understand anything I'm ever saying because 98% of the time, whatever's coming out of my mouth is not real and is not what I mean. It is a complete, utter 1,000% joke. Now, there is a lot of the time when I'm trying to be real and then it just comes out as a joke and then I can say like, oh, I was just joking.

And then I can't be embarrassed by it. But he has never laughed once at anything I have ever said. And I'm like, damn, I'm like spitting. I'm like saying some like really, really funny shit. But I did tell him that I was an eco-terrorist and he was like, oh. Oh. Don't do that um but yeah when i was like at that meeting i like was talking about something and i was like doesn't it feel like you're getting like fucking flashbangs like in your head just like like and dead silent and i was like

damn but like they know what we're referencing you know what that feeling is like it's like like it's like a buzzing in your ear but um yeah i have to stop referencing that as if people understand what the fuck that means like that is like such an odd thing to also like a weird thing to reference um but i feel like i've always been like a little bit spiritual, a little bit agnostic. Yeah. I used to like I like grew up in the church like crazy, not like crazy, but I like grew up in the church. And then like when my parents stopped going to the church, I still went and I would go every Sunday and every Wednesday when I was like a teenager to get confirmed. And I was doing that on my own volition.

And then one day the pastor said something like really really fucking homophobic and it scared the shit out of me and I was like I can't come back here and Madeline was also like that she was like I can't come back here and since I am so such a good straight ally like it was just like really um hard for me to see him say that to my heterosexual or homosexual friends. Literally me in 10th grade. Yeah, literally. And then I, but we still got confirmed in the church. But literally like the day I heard the pastor say that shit,

something clicked in my brain where I was like, oh, like this is crazy. Like organized religion is insane. And, like, not like, I mean, based on my experience, it was, like, crazy for me, and it felt really insane. And so I've just taken, like, this, like, faithful approach where I'm like, I don't claim any religion. Like a spiritual approach. Or, like, yeah, I just kind of like make up my own God.

And it's like been actually really nice and helpful. Yeah, it's crazy to think that this generation is like really full of the idea of like actually taking a step back and like looking at religion and like the harm it's done. I mean like, oh, there's some things I like about this, but a lot of it is crazy. A little crazy.

But yeah, I'm tapping back in to midnight gospel and like just listening to eckhart tolle old people read some eckhart tolle books i think that's how you say his name i don't know i don't know who that is alan watts alan watts and eckhart tolle i think i gotta find that out but like really, really great, like kind of like morality. Like it's like Eastern philosophy, but like translated, especially like Alan Watts is like Eastern philosophy and ideals translated really well for our Western brains to understand. And it's just really cool.

But Eckhart Tolle is just crazy. Yeah. Do you want to end it off with our fall debate? What is that? Oh, last night on the couch. Did you do your research? I didn't. I didn't because I saw how angry you got.

You were like, no, just save it. No, I wasn't angry, but I was like, dude, no, you have to save it because like, what if? Like, what if? So I'll let it start by like you telling me what you told me. Okay. So literally randomly, it was one of my Uber facts moments. I will admit it. Like I was just like, I just, it popped world calls fall autumn and we call it fall is because

the leaves in america fall and i said that can't be true that just like can't be true because i'm like well no the leaves are literally falling no i, I know the leaves fall here, but my theory is that, like, someone was just like, oh, the leaves are falling. It's fall time, whatever. Like, I assume, like, that's how it, like, became a thing here. But leaves fall.

In Japan, the leaves were, like, falling to the ground. I never said they didn't fall. You did. You were saying that. Oh, you bitch. He's literally trying to fucking gaslight me i for a second i was like dude i was i saw you believing it and i was like let me not alter the reality no no you caught me slipping

you caught me slipping and i leaves don't fall anywhere else and i was like we were literally just in a different country where they did you caught me slipping and i just i was in too deep and i tried to just get a fast one by you and i knew that was untrue because i literally had the same thought i was like the leaves were on the ground in japan like what am i talking about i have way too many pictures of them on the ground because i am that bitch because i was like i'm so fucking stupid and embarrassed and i just can't i cannot handle the humiliation of this and he got like mad at me last night i didn't get mad i was like i was like i'm gonna i was like i'm gonna look this up right now and then you but i was like don't look it up because like i knew that it

wasn't true because he was about to look up if leaves fall in different countries no i was looking up why it's called okay so why is it called fall um let me see he's such a bitch my child fucking sucks okay the reason why americans refer to autumn as fall what's your source um mental floss um fall isn't a modern nickname that followed more traditional autumn the two terms actually first recorded within a few hundred years of each other um the 1500s english speakers been began referring to seasons separating the cold and the warm months as either the fall of the leaf or spring of the leaf or fall or in spring for short. Oh, it could also be called fall because the temperatures are falling.

But that's like another that's like only pertains to Americans. So, yeah, it literally is just like people were like, oh, the leaves are falling. It's fall. Oh, yeah, exactly. Autonomous had overtaken fall as the standard British term for the third season. I wonder if like what's the translation to Spanish because it can't be like fall like falling over oh it is a different look up sounds really i don't like the way she says that autumn no that's fall look up autumn i'm curious if it's the same thing

oh me not knowing how to spell autumn a u oh it's the same thing interesting so it's like in spanish it's like interchangeable the air gets crisp the leaves start to turn and we break out our cozy sweaters we're of course talking about the season of pumpkin spice and everything nice which goes by two names, fall and autumn. That was a bad spot to shout for. Although both refer to the same season, Americans call it fall. Why is that? There's some confusing. Because Americans are fucking stupid and we just make up whatever the fuck we want.

No, because we're fine. We're so fine. We literally just say shit and say it's fact and then we're like, either you learn how to do this or you fall behind. And then that's what happens. And that's how the term fall came to be. Yeah me yeah wow nice little history lesson to close up the episode drew thank you for attempting to gaslight me you're welcome and you should be thinking that's what i was gonna say it teaches me to stay grounded and like and confident in my words yeah keeping you on your toes like you should be able to like be able to get like figure out when people are gaslighting you yeah it's on me for sure oh no oh is that happening it's happening

right now live as we're recording i want to do it mine isn't happening oh you must not be you know what i got a notification for it the other like two weeks ago and i literally knocked it off so fast so i wonder if it's not giving it to me because of how fast i was like get that the fuck out of my face okay let's listen to my rap uh wrapped right now remember your top genres from last oh wait this is from 2021 oh never mind that's so fucking lame i was so excited damn Damn. Damn. Damn. What? Spotify Wrapped is basically a tool that gives us to see the full information about our most loved artists, bands, and songs.

What the hell is that? I looked up Wrapped and it's like, when's Spotify Wrapped 2022 come out? Question mark. Well, this is my favorite song right now. What is this? Fart on my penis. Wait, yeah. What? I think they're gearing us up to give us the Spotify rap.

I think it's just showing us like the playlist that it was. Yeah, it's happening soon's happening yeah I want it to happen now I know because how lit would that have been to be able to go through it but I guess we have that for new year's patreon both of us are doing different answers um okay let's do shmedia um quite honestly I have not been listening to music that much lately like i haven't like been finding anything but i will go get something a couple things that i bought that i'll show to you guys that will be my media even though it's physical media it doesn't fucking matter um i'll just say my media because i also bought some cds but that's kind of mainly what I've been listening to

is Black Metal 2 by Dean Blunt um Loveless by My Bloody Valentine like I've been listening to that on CD because I just got that I've been listening to Love Deluxe by Sade because that's a CD I've already had but those are just like the CDs I've been listening to and then Slow Dive I can't remember which album it was he's again my boyfriend because I don't know the title of just for a day that album so those I've been like mainly listening to albums and not so much like songs right now but there was something I was listening to this morning oh and I'm back to looping Love Never Felt So Good by jackson because it just ironically enough makes me feel so good and i've been uh reading um i'm glad my mom died oh i spotify tricked me again they always fucking trick me

but they're like find your new favorite book and it was like oh i can listen to audiobooks on spotify now that's actually fucking lit but then you have to buy the books and then you can download them to fucking spotify or some shit because i was going to start listening to that yesterday um but okay i got a couple things um for y'all but i got the book we need to talk about kevin which like you probably have seen the movie um but apparently the book is better than the movie and it reads like a movie or some shit i don't fucking know um but i got it because i was like this movie was fucking lit and we need to talk about we need to talk about kevin moore because it's a masterpiece um and then i got don't ask me how to fucking say that lapvonia by otessa don't ask me how to fucking say that, Lapvonia by Otessa.

Don't ask me how to say that. But she's the girl. Like, she ate down with my year of rest and relaxation. And one of Josh's buddies was like, this is her new book. Her new book is also really fucking good. Go get it. And I was pissed because I like soft cover books and they only have the hardcover which is like the most random thing ever i'm like the complete opposite do you like it

because you could like bend it while you're reading it yeah exactly um but what were you gonna say i was gonna say i still haven't uh finished my year rest and relaxation and it literally is because it made me feel crazy because i was like this was me not that long ago and i need to close this like because it will literally like that felt so good that's also what i'm trying to avoid again but so i have a few cds for you guys we got lemon jelly um which i don't know anything about this album or these musicians at all. I just found them on Spotify one day because their cover looked really cool. And I've just been listening to them ever since,

like a couple of years. And I just saw the CD in the store and I was like, oh, I need that. Then I got The Money Store by Death Grips. Classic, classic Death Grips album. Get, get, get, get, got, got, got, got blood rushed in my head, they hot bucks. And then I got Donuts by J Dilla.

Again, classic. Classic. Like, really, if you haven't already. Actually, you know what? I'm not even going to give that to you. Don't listen if you haven't because you're not good enough. And then Miss Lana Del Rey. Yay!

I got ultraviolence But I really wanted Norman fucking Rockwell On CD Yeah Ow That's a really good album But

Come on My pussy tastes like Pepsi Cola Also Yayo On there Yeah Crazy And Yayo

But Thank you for listening That's this episode um peace love unity and respect so bad do you need me to massage it do you need me to get it for you because i can i can really do something some magic away motherfucker your boob hurts i can just touch it just let me fucking touch it i'm not gonna do anything just let me play with it or whatever like i can massage it and make it right oh i'm the fucking weird it's always the guy that's the weirdo and you are the freak like it's always the guy it's actually my nerve endings popping because my boobs are so big your nerve endings are exploding right now and this is how you're reacting

yeah i just couldn't sustain a lot of pain like I'm just my pain tolerance is so high well thank you guys so much for listening see you next week by next week I was gonna say oh by next week it won't be Thanksgiving anymore so happy early Thanksgiving why are you lying

I don't know when that is but I know I will be eating good oh you better eat you're eating no crumbs left behind I don't know when that is, but I know I will be eating good. Oh, you better eat. You're eating no crumbs left behind. Bitch, you're eating like Thanksgiving. You know what I miss is Savannah's. You're eating like Thanksgiving. Bitch, you ate like McDonald's.

Yeah, bitch, you ate like McDonald's. No, bitch, you ate like Thanksgiving. That's a good one, though. That's a good, good, like, oh, you ate like Thanksgiving, like you're eating. Not for white, not from high family i had this insane realization i was on the phone with my mom and i we were talking about like what they're doing for thanksgiving and she was like man you don't bother coming back you're good like you'll be here for christmas for a while sounds like my fucking family doesn't want me to come

home because i was excited to see them but she's like no we probably won't do anything um actually that was madeline and she's sabotaging me but anyways um i was on the phone with my mom and i was like i don't think i'm coming back for thanksgiving and she was like don't worry i don't want to fucking cook for anybody anyways like i don't think i'm gonna cook this year and then i like started thinking about like our family meals and like what they used to look like and all those like rancid photos that used to pop up on twitter that like savannah used to post every single year i was like i i really am sad that like i don't i guess i still follow her on ig and i think she kind of still posted yeah but damn i miss that pink plate i know that pink i need to see that pink plate um show me your pink plate but um

i just had this insane realization where i was like, we are the white people with the nasty fucking Thanksgiving food. Because like every year I'm like, do you know what I'm excited to eat on Thanksgiving? Like this is really telling. What I'm excited to eat for Thanksgiving that I only eat at Thanksgiving are mini corn dogs. And they're frozen mini corn dogs that my grandma gets from the fucking supermarket and heats up an hour before and i get so excited to eat those but that's nice that you still have something that you're excited to eat because it's like i don't know like you're not going out of your way to ever eat that so it's still like cranberry sauce too i've never had cranberry sauce like the fucking gelatinous jelly i mean it's kind of like the in shit that we drink but i can't do

it i literally it's so rancid and disgusting and it has like the ridges of the can behind it ribbed for my pleasure though because when i shove it up my fucking asshole it feels good well my dad fucking eats my dad goes in on thanksgiving and it is so good and it's so fucking yummy and i'm always so excited because my dad i come to miami for thanksgiving he would literally like i'm not kidding unironically love that like my my family is the family that like love my dad loves being a host and having people over um and yeah and i love going back and like eating all his food. And when I was vegetarian, he was so nice. Girl, I can't go. We need a break from each other. I know.

We were saying that like we were in the car. In the car is when it shows the most. I'm like, damn, we spend too much time together. What the fuck are we talking about right now? We're cruising to the gym together right now and talking about literally nothing. We're cruising to the gym and being like, oh my God, is that a new Toyota? Wow. Like what we've got in there.

I'm like, oh, that's my favorite tree. Like, I love that tree. Oh, okay. Yeah. Whatever. Okay. Ending this episode. Bye.

Bye. Bye. We didn't get to finish that thought, though. We'll save it for next week. Yeah, we'll talk about it some more next week. Outro Music