Emergency Intercom - Drew is target individual

Episode Date: August 18, 2023

Drew thinks he’s being followed Enya is a level 3 gyatt and Shawn Camila Cabello and Shawn Mendez copied us by walking slow…. This episode is sponsored by Better Help. Visit https://BetterHelp.com/INTERCOM today to get 10% off your first month. Get a 60-day free trial at https://www.shipstation.com/emergency. Thanks to ShipStation for sponsoring the show! Follow Enya on Insta: @EnyaUmanzor Follow Drew on Insta: @DrewPhillips09 To listen to the podcast on YouTube: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercomPodYT Don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercom If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercom Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I'm, like, so worried about my sister. Randy, you cannot marry a murderer. I was sick, but I am healed. Returning to W Network and Stack TV. The West Side Ripper is back. If you're not killing these people, then who is? That's what I want to know. Starring Kaley Cuoco and Chris Messina.

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Welcome to this episode of Emergency Intercom because you have that big ass fucking laptop on your lap. I got the biggest one possible. I know. That's why I'm like, why is it like, why do you have it? Because there's some things on here that we need to talk about. Oh, okay. Yeah. There's some things on here that... Your search history. We're going to go through it and talk about it. Honestly, we could.

Can I type something in and see what pops up? Let me do it first. Well, you don't know what I'm going to look up. What are you looking up? Yeah, we're good. Looking up gay. And looking up porn. Oh oh that site has been visited before wait what's that what's that link i would like to read it no that's crazy it just got it says

huge in it though i can never and it's talking about breasts big fucking knockers and bonbons i'll never get over um bronsons us talking about search history me being like yeah i hate when someone takes my phone because like the links will pop up and then you were just like why don't you use incognito and that changed my life you know what and people because i never did that before i don't know why i don't really use incognito because i'm not into damaging my brain because porn is really damaging and like it's an addiction and y'all all need fucking help. And I would never partake in that. But I can clock someone who is an avid porn viewer by opening their phone and going to Safari and not even typing in a letter.

But if it's in incognito mode, they watch a lot of fucking porn. Because a lot of people just leave they just use incognito mode as their search i know somebody who does that we both are very close to somebody who does that and you know who oh i know a few but yeah like right you need to be slicker with the way you view your p word um well i just buy it analog i believe in consuming magazines and then looking at pictures and leaving the rest of my to my imagination but i also do this thing where i just um i make my own zines and they're usually pictures of you oh but that was pictures of you when you're not looking and then i i look at those and i let my imagination

roam and i think of the nights we've spent were you using the shower camera yeah oh my god how Oh, but that was pictures of you when you're not looking. And then I look at those and I let my imagination roam. And I think of the nights we've spent together. Were you using the shower camera? Yeah. Oh, my God. How did you know? I installed it. I know.

But, like, I didn't know you knew I had access to it. Okay, whatever. Like, you're freaking me out right now. Like, you're really scaring me. Why do you have this big fucking contraption on your lap? Okay, so I did did we should have put a sticker over that i know i literally i literally thought about that and i was like no like apple respect like give me money um but i thought or no no i got um one of those ancestry ancestry

dna reports done yeah i got one of those ancestry dna reports done um uh to find out like what i am obviously like i'm cracker like i'm literally 100 cracker like it's what it is like it's okay um what it is what's up on top of that i guys like dying. But on top of that, I found out about this thing called Promethease. I think that's how you say it. But you take the DNA data that Ancestry.com extracts and you can download it as a text file and then you can upload that text. And it's like, I mean, it's all of your DNA.

All that from some spit? it's crazy um but you can install it or you can upload it into prometheus i got a few people i could do that uh test on you know what i mean because all that spit is trapped in your crevices yeah also while you were talking i had a moment where i was gonna butt in and make a really stupid joke and then i bit the fuck out of my tongue because i was like i shouldn't interrupt and then you weren't listening something and then no and i was listening but i was trying to juggle the joke that i had in my head before i forgot it and listening and then i thought about it and i was like the joke only made sense in that moment and that's why i had to cut in um because now it's like not as funny as it

could have been but the joke was and now I just have to say it the joke was when you were like oh my god Kai's over there dying and I was gonna be like oh for you audio listeners when he says that Kai's not actually on screen dying he's just like laughing really hard I thought you were gonna make like an old joke like Kai is over there dying yeah because he's like 86 years no I was just gonna like just for people who maybe don't understand that phrase like i don't want to like if someone's driving they're like oh my god kai's dying i need to like switch over to visual like he's not dying he's when we say that we mean like he's laughing so hard um yeah when i say like i'm dead as fuck i'm dead as fuck um but anyone who's 8 million years old

listening and confused so Prometheus takes that DNA data and tells you like based off of specific like um whatever they're fucking called don't ask me questions about it it's beyond my head but like it goes through each DNA strands and it

finds like the markers in your DNA that like show higher risk for certain things and it's like it's good bad and just like whatever and like it like um which it's actually funny because I have it just highlighted on bad and male is popping up which is interesting um but like you being a male yeah it's bad um but guys like it's over for me like you being a male. Yeah, it's bad. But guys, like it's over for me. Like you really thought like I thought it was blood clots. Like I thought it was black mold. Like I thought it was like anything else other than this.

But like it's so like I'm down bad. Like I might not make it. It's much worse than we could have ever imagined. I literally like might not make it. The thing much worse than we could have ever imagined. I literally, like, might not make it. The thing is, I just don't, like, I believe in science, but I don't know that I believe in this. Because I'm like, okay, one, it's insane that, like, your data is just out there after doing that one thing to buy this information from someone else. But two, bitch, if I was running this business, I would lie. It's deleted in 45 days.

Oh, really? Yeah. But that's why I did it, because I was like, I'm not doing all that. bitch if i was running this business i would lie it's deleted in 45 days oh really yeah um but that's why i did it because i was like i'm not doing all that um but this is so bad so guys i don't know how much longer we're gonna be able to do this podcast for because like this is really really bad but it says significantly increased approximately 20 times more than the average person risk for a rare b-cell lymphoma bitch i don't know what that means like i literally like what it's cancer i have 20 times higher risk of getting b-cell cancer this is it's like so bad like y'all and like you don't have like you don't

you don't know that you have it it's probably already brewing in there like this is the equivalent to like reading someone's chart no that's like you could have a bad day today but we don't know i was saying um today that i was like this is so bad for me because like this is literally like looking at how I'm going to die, basically, because there's more shit on here. I have an increased risk for type 2 diabetes, like a generational risk. We kind of knew that.

Yeah, I already have that. Your body physically can't digest any meal. That's over 10 calories. I go to sleep immediately. I got a 5.7 times increased risk for thyroid cancer. What's a thyroid? It's like this thing. Oh, in your throat.

Yeah. Right, right. Well, I know how you got the throat one. This one's crazy. I got a 6.2 times increased risk of developing prostate cancer again you know how you got that that one's from me this one this one says and it read me to filth that i probably have um scaly skin patches which is um so just like you're kind of ugly. You might die from cancer. But this is the greatest information I have ever gotten in my life. And it quite literally might be the only reason why I got this.

Like that it's worth it. Yeah. And it says unlikely to go bald. Hey! Not if I have anything to do with it. Not as long as you're living with me. Because when I hit it from the back, I ripped that hair that hair out i was like it's such a bad habit i'm also gonna get breast cancer probably at some point in my life is that what it says yeah i just don't find those kind of jokes

funny um so wait there's some more shit age-related muscular degeneration so you're gonna get arthritis probably yeah i feel like actually i have a feel like everybody actually I have a four-time risk for rheumatoid arthritis and it just says in Caucasians. Wait does everybody not get arthritis? I feel like with age you kind of just get it. Not everybody rheumatoid arthritis is like you can get arthritis and that's just like I think general aches and pains yeah just general like with age but rheumatoid arthritis is like a disease i'm pretty sure like it's like really fucking your shit up yeah you're like down imagine not being able to finger yourself bro like damn yeah that does i guess you have the technology to do it with other things god made

so many things but i'm trying to get where because you can just highlight all the good to do it with other things god made so many things but i'm trying to get where because you can just highlight all the good stuff but it's not freaking popping up there is no good stuff dude that's the thing it's like there's no way to highlight it because there's nothing good in your future i know like literally this says the only one that says you should kill yourself yeah no this one says that's a weird thing says that I have like an abnormally large penis and like big fucking... Oh, wait, let me see because I don't see that.

This one actually does say that like my brain is really massive and that like it probably goes over a lot of people's heads. Like everything I say and that like you're really misunderstood and like just things like that. Like just generally misunderstood person. They got that from

your DNA? How would they know that? Don't. Drew has issues. Dude, the things Drew spends money on I don't understand. Like if you were ever wondering what Drew spends his money on, it's shit like that and this. And I think that's like a really good and rocks rocks

and bugs this okay for the girls that don't know because i'm sure a few of y'all out there this is like an insane show and tell this is called a duo mon um and like i said a few episodes ago i am like so incredibly down bad and like i'm really addicted to Pokemon Go right now. This connects via Bluetooth to your Pokemon Go app and while you're driving or walking, you don't even have to open the Pokemon Go app. It just spins the stops and catches the Pokemon for you. Guess how much this was for all that convenience. Too much.

How much? I know, so I can't say. I would guess... 70 bucks? Wow! That was actually a really good guess. That was a really good guess. I'd expect for a piece of...

You were $10 lower. It was $80 fucking dollars. That's stupid. Oh, wow. Dude, let me touch it. It's for convenience. No. For convenience.

Let me see if that feels like an 80... I was going to make that joke because it literally feels like it should be three bucks. Yeah, you could have got this on Shein. Yeah, but it probably would have hacked my Pokemon Go account. How do you know this isn't hacking your phone? This is just collecting data. What doesn't make sense is you're somebody who's so scared of being surveillanced and watched, but then you openly and willingly carry a data collecting thing in your pocket

so that you can have digital pokemon on your phone i am i am a targeted individual but we all know this already i was talking about that the other day with somebody and i was like there was an era where drew genuinely thought and at first i was like oh my god this is another one of his like when he thinks he has blood clots like he thinks he's like like has an ear infection or something but there was a time where drew genuinely was convinced he was being followed and stalked which again doesn't make sense because no offense boring person no no who wouldn't want all this like i don't think it's not like a sexual thing though it was it was like

they want me so fucking bad um no it was more of like i knew too much. Like I was too. And what do you know that any other schizophrenic person with a TikTok account doesn't know? What did you know versus those people? Not much, honestly. Like it's it's it's really bad. No, I was literally just like actually I really thought I was like being followed or the universe was sending me signs and shit through like fucking blinkers and lights that were out on vehicles like headlights when i was driving at night it was really really scary because i'd be like oh there's another one there's another one there's another one and it was it was abnormal there were way more than normal and i was like what is this telling me well it also was like if you think

about it it was kind of during covid time so in my head that makes sense because i'm like people are less likely to want to go to a shop or like get their shit fixed etc actually what it was is it was the higher powers telling me not to sit on the left side of the vehicle because that's car a car is gonna hit and that's why you were a passenger princess not because you didn't have a car and you're bad at driving but because the higher powers were telling you that you need to sit the passengers you knew you know it um but yeah i was i was a targeted individual for a while i'm not anymore i will say that light that shines the like camera thing that shines in our backyard doesn't make sense but i'm assuming

that's like a mini 5g tower so i can watch more tiktoks yeah exactly that's all i'll take it is weird and they were working on it the other day and the workers were all really sketchy and looking at us i think it is like a camera or like a lidar sensor like facing into our backyard but like what would you even get from that oh it's directly what are you doing in the back yeah what are you doing that you're like... You don't want to know that. Oh. My nails are so fucking brittle and thin right now. I feel so emasculated. Like, when my nails get cut or I bite my nails too short, it makes me, like, 5% weaker.

Like, I don't know how to describe it, but when my nails go... When they're after being long and I cut them short, like, I feel... you don't live in a primitive time where you need strong nails though I know well I climb trees like a lot I don't think like I think even if your nails were strong would they help you climb trees imagine putting all your weight on your nails I don't know I really don't know um well I think porta potties are like remember how you keep talking about barbarian things that we do porta potties are like remember how you keep talking about barbarian

things that we do porta potties are so barbarian and weird i've always felt so weirded out by them they are so nasty like there has to be a better system it's just shit and piss sitting there and you go cooking in the sun yeah you go and you spray your piss on top of it all the particles are like bouncing up all the bacteria is bouncing up right into your hole. You're going to die. You're going to catch something. Like I would rather piss on the street than piss in a porta potty. I also would just like to piss in public in general.

Me too. I would like to see you do that too. Can you do that? You want to see me pop a squat? Yeah, I would like really like that actually. No, yeah. Porta potties are really scary and they give me bad fucking vibes. want to see me pop a squat yeah i would like really like that actually um no yeah uh porta potties are really scary and they give me bad fucking vibes like even beyond just like the

shit and piss stench like in there like literally just like the energy it gives off i'm like some weird shit like there's never a light in there even when it's in a dark place it's like fully dark and they make the plastic thin enough that a little light seeks through and it's just like they make it dark in there so you can't look directly into the hole that you're doing your business in because then everybody will step back and be like this is the weirdest thing ever and that's why they don't put lights in porta potties is because they don't want you to see exactly what's going on in there also you are a fucking maniac if you're going in there and tagging a porta potty on the inside that marker now is carrying like a new

strain of virus that's gonna kill like the whole population that might be their goal that might be the goal yeah but they're really gross and they scare me also those little water contraptions that you step on to wash your hands that they've like invented in the past five years before that there was nothing to wash your hands outside of a porta potty which is really fucking nasty but also like the water sitting in there is just like freaks me out because i'm like there's no way there's enough water in here to sustain watch it washing this many people's hands and i'm convinced that the water in there is being just like recycled and we're all washing each other's our hands with like piss water yeah i know those i think those were like a really really great invention.

It was a reactionary invention though. They need a mirror on it or something though. Also when mirror, like bathrooms don't have mirrors. I'm pretty sure I've said this, but it literally feels like a death sentence. Candyman. It feels like I'm being thrown into an asylum. Candyman. Is that what that movie is about?

No. A mirror? But if you say Candyman three times into a mirror, it pops up. Oh, so it's like bloody mary yeah wow so they replaced bloody mary with a man candy man is candy yeah candy man's the one with the hooks and did you see that movie uh i saw it like 20 years ago like my dad loved that movie for some reason candy man sounds like a new movie to me they remade it oh okay yeah but the old one there was like a scene where he was like covered in bees

or something and it scarred me for a lot we are are we taught to be afraid of bees or are we just like is it primal like is it in our dna yeah like i think it might be natural human instinct because it's not like in school they taught us like what bugs to be scared of was that your fucking pokemon thing talking to you yeah it's speed as a speaker on it yeah can you play music off that thing no but i can it out listen listen listen listen 87 pokemon hot 95 pokey stops visited it kind of keeps track of everything. And since I've gotten it, 97 Pokemon stops visited. That's incredible. Well, your bag is full. That's what it just told you.

So it's not going to be collecting anymore. Something's wrong with him. I have to put it over there. Oh oh why don't you just turn it off you don't want to stop catching pokemon no yeah i'm gonna keep it on to catch all of the rare pokemon in our vicinity dude something is seriously wrong with you it's up and it stuck hey i saw drake and actually for once i was actually not for once two people i've seen live performing who have actually made me feel like i had a prank being played on me was doja cat at the heaven event in new york well

she's part of the illuminati now you know i'm not kidding i'm i genuinely i rarely am stepping back and i'm like this is insane actually that's not true every time i see a famous person and see the way people interact with them i genuinely feel like a prank is being pulled on me because I can't believe that our human brains are like that intrigued with a random fucking person and it really freaks me out and two um it literally makes me step back and I'm like this is holly weird like I understand I understand the people with like 20 likes on tiktok who are like going off and going on a rant that's how the drake concert made me feel and I didn't want to explain it to you because I wanted to say it on the podcast he scares the fuck out of me something really sinister we need him on the podcast no i swear to god i would have sex with him though do

not if you're hearing this i will have sex with you like no questions um because i will say he did come down like near where we were standing where our tickets tickets were. And I saw him and the way my, like, I like was like, Oh my God. Um, whoa. Uh, hi. Like the way I felt, I felt like a teenage girl, but then the second he was on stage, like the second he was like 10 feet away and I saw him touching everyone's hands and everybody yelling at him. I was like, this is the weirdest thing I've ever witnessed. Um, and that's not necessarily a commentary on like fan him, I was like, this is the weirdest thing I've ever witnessed. And that's not necessarily a commentary on like fan culture, but more like he,

like something, something is happening. Something really scary is happening. The concert felt really weird. I was so happy I didn't get high because I was high

at the Dogecat heaven thing. And I felt like she was playing a prank on me when I was there. Like that's the only way I could describe it. There is a video of me post crying, like in the car with my hand out and I'm wearing that green shirt. If you've seen

that video, that was literally me after seeing Doja Cat live. And I cried because I felt so scared and uncomfortable. And I was so happy. I almost took an edible before I went and saw Drake and I'm so happy I did it because like, also the little kid who we keep bringing on stage, does that kid not have school? Like is he being paid? Like do we need to help him? Like why is he just on stage? And I literally thought he was a hologram or like an animatronic for half the show. And it was genuinely terrifying.

Doesn't he have holograms? He has like filters playing on people's faces and stuff. Or no, like on stage. Isn't there like a hologram of him? But it's like someone projecting mapping his face on like a younger version of him. Yeah's like someone projecting projecting mapping his face on like a younger version of him yeah it is like it's weird like i don't understand how they did it well i wasn't close enough to see if the kid actually like looks like him or had something on his face but on the screen they have it like um like a deep fake thing of his own face playing

and the kid is like i guess told to move really weird because he looks like an animatronic and i when i first saw i was like oh my god he has a hologram like what the fuck is that and then i realized it was actually a couch and like actually a person on there but it was really really scary um so that's my update is i'm really scared of drake yeah any anytime i'm at a concert like it's like the most euphoric I've ever been like I'm like oh like I love this so much I love that everyone is here for the same thing and then like I always have these really really low moments where I like am looking at a sea of people in the back of their heads and like they're all like barely moving and I'm like are y'all even alive like are people existing behind

me like this is really fucking weird simulation shit like and i'm sure everybody has that moment where they're like what the fuck are we doing like this is so weird but yeah or other people just like enjoy their life i get the most existential i've ever been like ever self-aware and existential at concerts every time i go i'm just like this is so so bizarre it gets so scary like i don't know it was really weird also people kept taking videos of me and i'm like guys yeah i know that was really weird I was I was telling everyone that that video is like literally I think one of the funniest things you've ever done one and two like it was one of those moments where I was like jealous like that I wasn't the one to make that joke like I was so like damn this is so funny somebody reposted that video on

tiktok and one of the top comments was like do you understand how confused the people who were trying to film drake are when they look back at the video and they just see you looking at them like hey yes i'm here there was one girl who she like behind her phone like had her phone like this and kept being like she was like like didn't want to look at me like kept trying to like like maneuver her phone where she couldn't see my face because everybody i was like right by the stairs so everybody right there was like stare not staring at me but they were trying to see drake yeah but like i was just staring right at all of them and i caught eye contact with every single person. Every single person probably thought I was a fucking psychopath. Like the way I walk into any situation and I clock one person who makes me uncomfortable.

I'm like, cool, they're going to stab me. I was giving that to someone else that night. A stabbing today. A stabbing today. This episode is brought to you by Samsung Galaxy. Ever captured a great night video only for it to be ruined by that one noisy talker? With Audio Erase on the new Samsung Galaxy S25 Ultra, you can reduce or remove unwanted noise and relive your favorite moments without the distractions.

And that's not all. New Galaxy AI features like NowBrief will give you personalized insights based on your day schedule so that you're prepared no matter what. Pre-order the Samsung Galaxy S25 Ultra now at Samsung.com. Yeah, I think we need to have Doja Cat on to fight the Illuminati allegations. I think what I think is it's a case of all publicity is good publicity taken too far and this whole satanic panic like everyone playing off of this satanic panic like as publicity is just so tried and fucking boring and like everyone was just fucking fed up with it and like doja just took it too fucking far she was just like

like yeah i don't know that's my take on it like no one's actually in the fucking illuminati the illuminati isn't fucking real she just took it too far guys is it like how would we know it's right in front of you guys we're not in the illuminati oh you remember the black eye photo of me you know the thing of those people like touching the orb no you know what i'm talking about like why don't you ask me if i knew about it well i assume since you're a girl you're not i was just making sure that was why you're not as intellectual as us boys well drew's obviously the schizophrenic one you know and i'm the normal one yeah yeah there's always one normal one and one schizophrenic one in the squad but no it's like some island that

all these conspiracy theorists were like oh elites go to this island and they do rituals. Oh, it's like the big owl burning. Yes. Yeah. And then like photos came out of like actual people that were like touching an orb and like Hillary Clinton's there. Bruh, that's like the equivalent to when white people just like take an overly holistic viewpoint of their life because they get so bored and they don't have problems. And then they're like, we need to do something problems and then they're like we need to do something the end like we just need to do something like i'm literally so bored so they yeah so they start just like going and making shit up like that has to be the equivalent of that it's like it's like when people go on like

a spa retreat that's their version of a spa retreat because they've been to too many spa retreats so they're like we need to start our own thing yeah and then there there's that big fucking tunnel too that they dug through and then oh the tunnel under ocean boulevard yes and it was for alana del rey release party and they had like a really demonic like um ritual done like a big dance thing and like watching it like when i was 14 i was like oh wow this is really crazy but i think it's literally just like people like being stupid. And that's what I'm going to choose to believe. So I don't go insane.

They're all fucking high as shit. They all did. But I'll show you the video. It's it's honestly really bizarre. Like the shit that they're acting out. And it's like, wait, is it famous people? No, no. It's like rich people.

Really, really wealthy people like bored through a mountain. And like the opening, it was, a big hole in the ground. And, like, the ceremony after was, like, just really creepy. And it was, like, the Olympic ceremony in 2012 or something like that or 2016. Like, had, like, a big-ass, like, sculpture of, like, a grim reaper and, like, a... The Olympics. Yeah. They had, like, a big... Like, their Olympic ritual. And then there was and like, like the Olympics. Yeah. They,

they had like a big, like their Olympic ritual. And then there was like viruses everywhere. And people were like, it was predictive programming for like the pandemic that's going to come in 2020. Or it could have been like 2018, but it was,

it was one year. Well, the only time I watched the Olympics was in 2012 when One Direction performed. That's the only time I've ever seen anything about the olympics like i'm not kidding is it the olympics happening in la this year um or is it next year 2024 2024 why are we going to the olympics that's fucking lit wait that was the olympics i know and then it's kind of insane for the olympics that's what i'm saying that was the olympics too yes and then there's like crazy people in like beds and shit like it's really it's really it is really bizarre oh wait why is it a pirate 2028

2028 this this is hamilton i've never seen hamilton bro I don't know what that is. Yeah, I just know that one dude is, like, really creepy. Puerto Rico! Him. Yeah, exactly. Right. But what did you just say? You just said something. I said I've only seen the Olympics when One Direction played.

Oh, I... That was the only time I tapped in. And I remember that day so vividly because that was the day I was, like, 13 i was like i'm gonna live in new york and be a writer and i was sitting there watching one direction which is like okay like you swear like what the fuck like you're literally watching and i was eating special case cereal and it was really fun and i missed those times the only time i really tuned into the olymp Michael Phelps' gold medal run. And when I found out Michael Phelps smoked weed, it was earth shattering for me. Like heartbreaking?

Yes. It's like when we all found out Zayn and Justin Bieber smoked weed and we're like, stop, please. Well, Justin Bieber smokes meth with selena gomez have you seen a video of them like literally like running through like a meth like a meth populated area and like they just bought meth and they like are running away no it's really crazy that reminded me of sean mendez and camilla the video of them walking. Walking to the neighborhood in Miami. That's literally one of the best videos ever.

We got to insert that. Yeah. We have to insert our recreation of it too. We were so fucking we were literally was that pandemic boredom they were going on their pandemic walk and it was like sean mendez and camilla cabello taking a pandemic walk oh there's like a big ass fucking squirrel in that tree right now you have ad you have adhd as fuck squirrel shiny squirrel oh what was i saying shiny shiny object um next time i go to a store and a like clerk or sales assistant is being too pushy and really trying to make me buy something i don't

want to buy i'm just gonna fucking steal it where were we when you want to get rid of it so bad it was literally a video game store yeah yeah yeah they were like trying to push video games on us um so i stole a bunch of stuff yeah in retaliation for a business that needed my purchase i stole from them yeah i think we should all just start stealing from small businesses because like the big businesses are getting hurt it's it's also just boring yeah like stealing from people who have enough money like that can afford it like no i want to ruin people's lives yeah i want this to like really i want to cause a domino effect i don't do anything just to do it i do it for the domino effect we should destroy the economy oh when they're like all these freaking financial studies coming out that like Taylor Swift, when she goes to certain places on tour, that she like stimulates the economy like in a crazy way. Like I think it was Philadelphia or it was either Philadelphia or another P word place that she visited.

Oh, the P word you're thinking of is your mom's P word because when I go there, I overstimulate it like crazy. See, it was actually your gat pussy like girl you got a gat for a vagina your vagina is gat yeah but what is that you got a gat a gat vagina what it's like when you see like a big butt you're supposed to go yeah damn oh okay but like people are not supposed to say like god damn what that you gotta get um but taylor swift and to be straight but taylor swift stimulates you that's how he said button not boobs he said big butt and not that's true so it's not straight okay sorry okay taylor swift stimulates herself keep going

no she stimulates the economy in the craziest way like that but you know in pennsylvania philadelphia somewhere um the like tourism board like said that it was the most hotels ever rented out in a single three-day period. And it was something like 300,000 hotel rooms were rented out. Which if you think about that for three... Is there that many hotels? That's like a billion dollars in revenue for Pennsylvania, Philadelphia or something like that. That's crazy. And then not even to mention all the Ubers and the people eating.

Fuck, when we go on tour we're literally gonna like the economy is gonna be boosted back up like it's gonna be i'm honestly gonna feel bad for everybody in those towns who like aren't used to that kind of like traffic traffic yeah they're gonna like be late to work and stuff and it's like damage the economy we're gonna have to like file for bankruptcy yeah we're gonna have to like file for bankruptcy we're gonna go in the negatives we're gonna have to like beg the government to give us money back what the fuck were you looking at I was looking at your vagina the thing is you like were cause you were gonna

it reeks in here I almost said something so fucking gross but what are we gonna say it wasn't even that gross but it was just disgusting to say to you but i was gonna be like oh do you want to just give it a taste so you can put the rumors to rest but the idea of me looking at you and saying do you want to you can't look me in the eyes anymore um well this this is one line in one line only and we're not touching on it for any longer than we have to but big sexy man had emergency intercom playing in the background if you're watching hello you know what i'm talking about yeah i know i know because i said to you immediately and what's

crazy is i had already stalked this person a lot a lot of a lot of videos were seen why are you backtracking because now you're embarrassed because i'm embarrassed um but you can we can we don't have to talk about it yeah Yeah, we can move on. Let's move on. This is all notes on a specific event that happened that I was like, I wanted to talk about. What's the event? But I want to make a movie about it or like write a movie about it because it is one of the craziest things I've ever heard happen. And no one's made a movie on it yet. And it's fucking crazy because it would be like a sick cronenberg movie i mean not cronenberg uh coen brothers or like he's he's another like really creepy director he makes really creepy movies

um but it's the 1904 olympic marathon i don't know about that bro i. Like, I'm sorry. 1904 isn't a year I need to have any, like, knowledge on. It's the worst. Okay, I'm sorry, but that squirrel is going in. He's hanging upside down right now. Squirrel. It's the worst race ever in history. Wait, please come here and look at it, Drew. His feet are hanging off.

Do you see that? His feet are hanging off the left. What the hell is he doing? He's tweaking. Where is he? Where'd he go? I don't know. I've never seen them do that. He's like using his feet to hold him

and his tail. He's gonna fall and fucking die. Dude, what's crazy is that animal has no fear of literally falling to his death right now like that's not even on his mind do you see that guy oh whoa yeah he has really big nipples it had like six big ass fucking nipples so fucking massive areolas i've never seen a squirrel actually do what a squirrel was meant to do usually they just like one up the trunk of the tree yeah they're like climbing on roofs and fucking wires yeah um but the 1904 olympic marathon was the worst race in human history um it was like in 1904 so

they obviously didn't understand like proper hydration and like how to take care of people by 1904 they didn't know they needed water. They knew they needed water, but they didn't know like at the rate. They didn't know that they needed Red 40. Which I'm still like, I don't believe that we need that much water to survive because I swear to God from like six years old to like 21, I only drank Coca-Cola for like-

That's being really nice to yourself from 21 to 25 right now because you still don't really oh my god it's funny because it wasn't on camera and i haven't seen that in your hands listen since we last recorded i haven't seen it in his hand proper hydration that's like your cum water well it is just jizz that's your adderall water addy water when me and inya were on press play we would find um adderall pills and dump them into bottles of water because we wanted to share them but they were the ones that you had that like capsules that had a bunch of little beads in it and we would put it in water but it's not water soluble so we would shake it

up and it wouldn't melt and And we would go to drink it. And like whoever gets the most little pellets gets the most Adderall. And we were like fighting to be the person to get the last swig. And like whoever got the last swig got the full dose. And you will never guess who won. Yeah. And you won and it was fucked up. I won.

But yeah, we were drinking Adderall water. You know Molly water? And I was up till 8 a.m. And then we continued to go and meet all of you guys hung over at the ripe age of 17. It was crazy. Bloodshot eyes shaking. In like purgatory almost. Like it was really crazy.

Like you couldn't even think thoughts. Okay, so this race was on unpaved roads. It was like dirt roads. They were running on dirt roads through the middle of the city in st louis they were running from the coming of christ like why are they just like running on dude it's so crazy and like also they started this race at 3 p.m in st louis in the middle of fucking summer so in the shade it was 90 degrees in outsider shade it was upwards of 105 degrees running a marathon which in today's standard like you cannot start a race legally if it's higher than 70 degrees like really i mean i think you can but it's like really really hardly recommended that like you you don't start the ideal temperature to start a race is 40 to 50

degrees damn like you want to be cold and then work your way up yeah and you want to be done by fucking 10 like you don't want to be racing yeah you don't want to be racing um and on top of all of that on this race there were only two water stations the entire marathon. This is the Olympics? This isn't like someone was just having fun? This is the Olympics. Was it the first Olympics? No.

There were only two water stations. And the reason why is fucking crazy. So the commissioner of the race was using these people as experiments. And he wanted to research, quote unquotequote purposeful dehydration um which is crazy yeah so they only put two water stations in 100 degree weather to like experiment on these like poor fucking racers like it was so so sad um and then i could keep getting into i could go i could really go deep um is it sad there's like some parts that are like damn but um only 34 of the people who started the race finished so only 14

people finished and this is i would not want to fight any of those bitches yeah they're they're real real like healthy and like people were literally just like collapsing and like coughing up blood and like literally almost dying because of all the dust they were inhaling on this race like they were sprinting they do it on the road like that on purpose or they just it was just that was just a plus for the freaks who were putting on the experiment they were like oh cool yeah now we get to see yeah now we get to see their freaking um well like this race was so insane that people were literally like being run off the fucking course by rabid animals and like dogs were chasing them around yeah it's like really really crazy um yeah yeah um this was in orlando so this this is a story i'm like oh wes anderson

needs to make a movie about this but one of the racers i thought he was like happy with his movies oh that's the story of one of the racers yeah um one of the racers was this mailman from cuba kai shut the hell up he's fucking talking i think that was the first time i've ever sneezed on i think so i think so um sounded very like a like a girl sneezing so oh well yeah it was like a really girlish sneeze he's like what's wrong with that i bet he's gonna put a vocalizer on it to make it deeper yeah yeah because it was like you didn't like stretch it out a little bit like you like let out a little bone yeah i'm gonna edit a bunch of farts throughout the entire episode

while you guys are talking um that's good for us actually are you calling me fart mouth whoa that's good for us actually um one of the racers was a mailman from cuba and like so to get to the olympics is like it's really fucking expensive and like you need sponsors and like you need funding like a lot of people just can't afford to go to the olympics on their own especially in 1904 what was it like three dollars to go yeah yeah before inflation um it was 20 cents he was doing this thing called like uh running for money or something i don't know the fucking term for it but he would literally just like run around Cuba. He would do this thing called like working for money. Yeah, he would run around Cuba

and just like collect donations from people. Yeah. And like to get him to the Olympics because like he wanted to go really badly. Well, it's finally time for him to fucking leave. He gets on the boat and he's driving across the ocean and fucking partying on this big ass boat like with all the money he just

got then he lands in Louisiana and when he gets to Louisiana he's not supposed to be there very long but he like gets there and just gambles all of his money away and parties the entire fucking time he's there

like he turns the fuck up and he goes to miami and starts a family and now he still lives there well this dude is alive yeah exactly well this dude is like oh fuck i like have a race so he like starts hitchhiking but he has no money to get to the fucking race so he starts hitchhiking and he's like taking buggies and cars and riding trains all the way to St. Louis. Okay, what the fuck did the cars and shit look like? There wasn't cars yet. They were insane. And then he gets there.

And when he gets there, it's like seconds before the race. And there's photos of him. And right before the race, he's in like civilian clothing. He fucking stinks. He's been traveling for 40 hours. He hasn't eaten in 40 hours. He's like so. Oh, Hannah.

Bitch. Oh, my God. Imagine getting this on your sweet 16. I'd be pissed. No, that'd be fucking lit. What are you talking about? I actually was reading an Eve Babbitt's book and she was like in this book. Sorry to interrupt.

But in this book, she's talking to somebody who grew up in like the fucking 1920s and shit so by the time this girl was 16 in 1927 her parents gave her a car and they were like oh it was a ford model t and me looking for a vintage car i'm like oh what's a ford model t bitch you were looking at this you were gonna buy a ford model t because fucking eve babbitts because not even eve babbitts had her friend had it wait ford model t look at this fucking car oh no uh steven's dad has one yeah bitch here i go the fuck here i go wait it was literally like like one of these yeah those are classics actually this is low-key lit like i'd be serving great gatsby yeah great gatsby core it's giving the light okay so this dude gets to the race right before it's about to start and he's in just full civilian clothing and all these

racers are in like short shorts like cut off sleeves like Being sluts. They're literally just, like, ready and prepared for the race. Well, he's like, fuck, I can't race in this. So he literally cuts off his pants, like, into shorts. And he cuts his sleeves into short sleeves. And he's just going to race in civilian clothing. Well, he hasn't eaten in 40 hours because he was just hitchhiking the whole way there. And, like, there's, like, mixed, like, people. Recounts. Yeah, mixed accounts of, like people recounts yeah mixed accounts of like recounts of this happening so like this could be real or it couldn't could not be real but i'm gonna choose

it to be real you choose to take it how you want but this dude was starving so he ran up to two strangers who were eating peaches and he stole these peaches from them ate them really quick and then just started the race like he the race started and he's like obviously two peaches isn't doing anything for you you have to run like what is it like fucking 10 miles is how long is the marathon like 14 miles or some shit 20 miles 26 miles i don't fucking know um because it's in kilometers like bitch fuck kilometers like literally fuck kilometers kill yourself well he like is in the middle of this race and he's starving his stomach's hurting and they're running past an orchard um on this race and so he goes up and he grabs a bunch of apples on the floor and starts eating them well those apples were like were like hella, hella fucking rotten.

So like he starts getting like really gnarly cramps and bubbly guts and like he feels really sick and he's about to throw up. He's also been running in 100 degree weather for like fucking two hours or something and he's just like freaking the fuck out. So he lays down in the shade to take a nap. Well, he wakes up and he's like,

fuck, I need to finish this race so he just starts running and he he is one of the only people to finish the race and he placed fucking fourth place while taking a nap in the middle of the race if that shows you how fucking awful these conditions were this seems like a story like a teacher would tell you about taking your time in life so there was this man so then there was this guy named fred lores who was the winner and he finished the race in three hours and 15 minutes which i think for today's standards is pretty fucking fast let alone doing it in 100 degree weather in uh 1904 well he had that he had his arcteryx um water yeah yeah yeah he got he had the yeah he had his gorp on yeah he

had gorp core um well this dude was a good runner like world class um and he was actually really impressive um but as he crossed the finish line he was like partying with like franklin franklin roosevelt's daughter like the press was like hyping him up he was about to receive he was about to hit no he was about to bang he was getting interviewed like it was it was uh it was being the lone survivor of the world's most chaotic marathon and getting to him yeah no he won he was probably really stinky oh he probably had good pheromones yeah she was smelling his pheromones um i mean he's getting interviewed and then it comes out that this dude halfway through the race collapsed at mile nine from like dehydration and cramps and took a fucking car all the way to a mile before the finish line and just jogged the rest and like he made it believable enough that

like it was like yeah so he cheated and got first place did he hit though yeah he smashed he hit he fucking finessed franklin lozerbelts double um fuck man um but the real winner was thomas hicks and halfway through the race he was like begging for water and like freaking the fuck out he was like so dehydrated like as everyone was and he had his like two trainers with him this dude is like a world-class runner. I think he went on the next year to actually win first place again um in 1905 Um, but like halfway through the race obviously like everyone else he was like freaking the fuck out dehydrated and he had his trainers with him And they were like really trying to motivate him to like go further and he was to the point where he was like

Collapsing in their arms. He was like I really i cannot finish this i cannot do this race well his trainers are like fuck like we have to do something he's like there's a puff bar at the finish line basically basically dude what they did is they propped him up on their shoulders and they didn't want to like shock his system and so they got like a dirty ass fucking rag and just like dripped water into his mouth and like sponge bath him with water and they were like is that enough and he was like no like i'm not gonna be able to finish this race so what they fucking did in true 1904 fashion gave him a bottle of brandy and a bottle and they thought it was a stimulant back then so he chugged a bottle of brandy they cracked an egg into his mouth and he ate the egg whites or i think he ate the whole egg

um into his mouth and like that was supposed to give him enough energy and that still wasn't working on my birthday we are going to crack a bottle of casamigos into my mouth throw an egg in there and i'm about to literally run back to miami yes and then so that still wasn't working so they gave him fucking strychnine which is rat poison they just gave him a bunch of fucking rat poison so they gave him brandy this sounds like the best day ever i know well he was he was like tweaking off the fucking bean like he was literally like hallucinating like this shit like affects your nervous system like i forget what it's like toxic to your nervous system so like it just like whatever motion you're doing your body just does

and you like can't fucking stop so he's like repeating this like jogging motion like all the way to the fucking finish line and eventually like another couple miles in like his uh he's like kind of failing a little bit so his uh trainers flagged a dude, which in 1904, this is crazy. They flag a dude down in his car. The dude is like, hey, do you have anything to give him? He's like, oh, I have another bottle of brandy. So he drinks another fucking bottle of brandy. And, like, so he's two bottles of brandy deep.

He's strychnined, like, the fuck out, like, hallucinating. Like, think about doing, like doing like dmt and that's like what it's doing to this man um and he's like geeking like we literally told bro we geek hard like he's like the og geeker it's hard to believe that all these things were happening during this one i know it's really really crazy um well he's literally like a zombie at this point like just like like stumbling yeah getting through it and even crossing the finish line in this race is like you deserve a medal like this it's crazy they were like breathing in fucking glass dust and like chemicals and it was dirt and

it was so bad well like um oh i wrote down ah american horror story asylum post lobotomy is like what he was like what he looked like yeah um full-blown lsd trip well he crosses his finish line and he's like tweaking so hard off this strychnine that when his like uh people lift him up he's still running like you know when you like put a dog over like water and they like swim like with their legs he was doing that in real life but like jogging he was like and there's a photo of him sitting in like this buggy and he's like like he's literally like freaking the fuck out i'm not kidding for my birthday this is what we're doing you gotta get that pic of me in an uber i would literally do rap poison just because it sounds fun but this dude in three hours and 20 minutes lost eight pounds and i'm like damn like skinny like skinny

skinny skinny like i need to do that like like so basically he walked away like a triple winner yes exactly that's how i ever lost weight and won the. So he was the... But what's crazy is he didn't get to hit Roosevelt's daughter. No, no, no, no. Like, let him hit. Come on. But yeah, he won the real race, the skinny race. And yeah, he came out of the closet and was a winner. Wait, what?

What if I told you that I made all of that up? I would, like, seriously think you need psychiatric health i made all that up did you actually no oh i believe you're like damn you're so creative like you should i was just like damn we gotta take that ipad away from you and take you outside i have a baby but no that's like obviously 1904 stories so there's like a lot of like fucking lies in there but like um yeah it's crazy also there was just like a lot of weird funky shit going on like previously with that olympics and like it was just it was a really really humans are so bored like we are literally so the olympics like it's so it's so funny it's

literally like dude let's see how good we could get at doing a flip let's see how good we can get at doing a flip. Let's see how good we can throw this ball. Like, it's so crazy. It's so weird. Dude, they need to do the sex Olympics because I'd probably win gold, like, in most of the categories. Like, most sex had, like, goodest at sex, like, biggest penis. Like, that's probably, I would probably win all those categories. I don't think so. Right. Well.

I'll leave you off with one more thing and i was watching a tiktok and this dude like fell down that slide and like one of the comments was like oh he gave us like a whimpering audio or something and it was highlighted blue and i was like i shouldn't click that i really i should not click what that blue text right now because it's going to be the worst thing i've ever fucking heard in my life um and you can link stuff in tiktok comments now i don't know how they did it, but like it was like blue in the comment. And I clicked on it and what I found is the most appalling, horrific,

craziest shit ever. It's just a bunch of like blank screens with exclamation points saying, turn it up, turn it up! Like literally just like in headphones like, and it's like, it's a whimper challenge and it's like it literally was the most horrific thing i've ever stumbled upon and it's literally just like fucking they're

all boomers they're all like do you remember that silhouette challenge where like people would get naked in the doorframe and it was just like all really fucking old people like i'm literally red like that like was fucked up but like yeah it's literally those same people like humans are so funny because how are you that horny that like you're like like slinging meat on a fucking yeah on the timeline like it's so insane a silhouette of your like dong hanging between your legs like it's crazy um that's really gross yeah well you don't have any juice app actually i have a site i do have a bunch actually i completely forgot about that fuck wait i have one for you um while you're looking for it there's this thing called ghost kids and they're

industry plant gorillas and it's the craziest shit i've ever seen in my entire life what yeah there's like um industry plant gorillas now um like the band the gorillas and they posted a flyer of rolling loud and was like oh we're like gonna be playing rolling aloud and everyone was like who the fuck are you no you're not why are you lying and everybody thought it was like this drew psyop corner when the face id fucking up and i gotta lock in like our phones literally make us serve to it to like unlock like sometimes it's just fucking everybody has to be like you gotta lock in you gotta lock in um but yeah the no you're good the gorillas uh industry plant they said they were performing um rolling loud and even rolling loud was like no the fuck you're not and everybody thought it was like this big like um uh like publicity stunt well they

literally did play rolling loud and they opened for little uzi and like it's the craziest shit i've ever seen and it is the most obvious industry plant i have ever seen in my entire life. And they have a song with, like, Vince Staples and, like, I don't know. It's really, really fucking bizarre. And you should look up videos when you get a chance because it's so, so weird. And, like, all of their accounts are, like, super fucking botted. Like, on TikTok, they have, like, 5 million followers and they get, like, 100,000 likes. We need to bar our own accounts.

I know. I'm literally about to. Yeah, I'm I'm literally about to. People probably say that because like why the fuck do all of our views or videos get that many views? Like it's insane. It's because we bought them. Yeah we do bought our videos. I'm going to get my charger. My phone's about to die and I want to get media.

Welcome to True Sci-Op Corner. Vaza got me thinking about tragedies that haven't even happened yet march 3rd 2024 damn damn that was then when that that was right before my birthday something bad is gonna happen um okay this one's good imagine giving me head and I yell out boring don't come to my house don't come to my house pouring big cups of juice washed up bitches love throwback Thursday

that's literally me emergency intercom release days is like the Superbowl for people with crumbs in their bed burger king be like 20 nuggets for one dollar and 50 cents boy that shit is leftover bbl meat i'ma fly a lucky follower out to my house and fuck them all day all right well i'm gonna start media i don't have any movies or anything somebody was like oh my god it's taking you so long to watch the fucking sopranos because of the thing i posted

but that's a draft from like may uh that i made but it is taking me forever i only have look i only have 20 episodes left to watch, which is literally a full day worth. I heard you all talking about it last night. You had like 21. And I also heard you talk shit about me briefly. What did I say? You thought I was asleep and you were walking to the bathroom and you said something to someone. You said my name.

What did I say? I don't know, but I heard you. And it woke me up immediately because I was like, oh, wow, someone's talking shit about me. But you said it angrily. I think you were talking to Josh and I was like, oh, wow, this is talking shit about me. But you said it angrily. I think you were talking to Josh, and I was like, oh, wow, this is crazy. I don't remember us talking shit about you. Everyone talks shit about me behind my back. It's so weird.

Sis, I talk shit right to your fucking face because I'm not fucking scared of you. How about that? Oh, Spring by Angel Olsen. Right. I'm going to need your phone. Right. To go to the emergency intercom playlist because my phone's dead. Glad Tidings by Van Morrison.

Drew Wimper Challenge that only I have. Ew. And honestly, those are my only medias that I can give you today. Like, how about that? I don't really have much to give you you've taken everything from me that's my media challenge i just got so tired i actually

don't think i have any media i don't think anybody cares about media so how about that i know literally no one cares no one actually international players anthem by outcast and ugk close to you the cranberries cover i was listening to that again because it's so good flim by apex twin my girl there you fucking go oh i'm re-watching death note again for like the 18th time and every time i watch it it's so fucking good, bruh. Like, it is so good. All the twists and turns in the first two episodes, I'm, like, gagged every time. Even though I've seen it, like, a hundred times, I'm gagged every fucking time. And those goddamn apples. Like, I want to eat those fucking apples so bad.

So, so, so, so bad. Oh, my last, actually, media song is Sprung by T-Pain, which I think I said last week. And then I heard it in a store yesterday and I haven't heard that in public since 2009. I don't think I've ever heard that song in public. Really? It was such a popular song. Yeah. I'm sprung, won't you get me?

But also like the public I went to was Granberry and there were like eight stores total and all of them were like grocery stores and they were playing a CD yeah exactly all right well thank you guys so much for listening um I just want to apologize that I wasn't myself today I'm going through a lot right now he's lying he's like not going through anything so he just wants to i don't tell you everything i go through y'all don't know like that's the thing is i keep a lot of things in into myself hey you shouldn't do that you should be open with me well no like men aren't i'm going through like stuff too so men aren't one aren't allowed to cry two boys don't cry uh men shouldn't go to therapy yes um because like therapy is for bitches and women like the um yeah wow okay that's a good way to leave the episode all right thank you guys for watching Bye.