Emergency Intercom - everything is falling apart

Episode Date: February 21, 2025

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With the Fizz loyalty program, you get rewarded just for having a mobile plan. You know, for texting and stuff. And if you're not getting rewards like extra data and dollars off with your mobile plan, you're not with Fizz. Switch today. Conditions apply. the T is with the echo. I'm sure that makes sense. Everyone, everyone was like, I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this.

I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this.

I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm not gonna do this. I'm hear is crazy. I don't like my family. Well, well, though, the tears with the echo like that makes sense. Everyone everyone was like the echo, the echo, the echo so bad when I listened back, I literally

did not hear an echo at all. And I'm like, what the fuck is going on? Like, can I not hear? I don't think I can hear good anymore. Really? Yeah. Yeah, I think my hearing is kind of sharp. But no, I definitely hear an echo.

But I think we fixed the echo in this episode. So it should sound a little bit better for you guys right now. I'm sure it sounds good as far and like honestly, if it doesn't you get what you get and you don't throw no literally guys seriously like I did the camera today. So you guys don't have to worry about it. Oh, yeah. Kai did such a good job of setting up today. He crashed out. We are crashing the fuck out. Like, oh my God.

Well here's the thing, I drink a lot. I started at 7 a.m. You always drink a lot. I always, well not. It depends on your definition of a lot, but I started drinking at seven. I came in, I set everything up for you guys. But you came in what?

I know, I came into the house. Don't make it sexual, do I? You always make it sexual. And then I just set everything up, so. Why do you always be so freaky? I might have bumped into a couple things. Yeah, Kai set up this studio today. No, he came in and crashed out.

He literally just came in. It's hard throwing shit around. It was really actually scary. We should make a breakaway room out of the set. We should have a bunch of those made and just let y'all go in and fucking freak out and we'll have dummies of us that y'all can beat up and hit you.

And yeah, that's literally such like an actually good idea. Whoa. I mean, dude, the thing is about me is I am one of the greatest minds on the planet. Yeah, see, like the T is, is the amount of ideas we have, more specifically Inya that like she has that we're like, okay, we're gonna do this because there's a lot of shit that we wanna do that we don't do that gets done

six months to a year later is genuinely insane. Like it's actually shocking. You know what it is and I really think both of us have to get better at this. Orion's so good at it. But Orion's so good at it, but Orion bends over backwards to do everything herself and that's why she's the fucking hermit.

We do that same shit. But that's what I was going to say is like we all like everyone we know takes on tasks that we know are things that could get done, maybe sometimes even better. I think we're all extremely good at what we do. But like not maybe not better, but faster. If we just ask for help. Fapper. Yeah. And we don't ask for help.

And I do that with everything. That's what I've been doing with sewing. Bitch, I haven't looked up a single video on how to sew something. Hell no. And I've been making shit because I'm just going to tie it up. Wait, have you showed the crown that you made?

No. Well, insert a picture if you want. It's so cute. And I also, I've started, so like I've been painting for years and I kind of keep it a secret from everyone because I- Okay, me showing off.

No, I literally- I'm kidding. I literally keep it a secret because like once I posted online, I just like fall out of love with whatever I'm doing. So I started painting in privacy and I have always been so scared of oil paint. Like oil paint freaks me the fuck out.

Like I never thought I could do it. And then I started my first oil painting piece last week, two weeks ago. And why did no one tell me that oil paint is fucking lit? Like, it's so lit. It is so fun. I only started oil painting because of you, but I'm still really bad at it because I have absolutely no fucking patience. I'm not waiting for this to dry. What do you mean it's going to take like hours to dry?'m still really bad at it because I have absolutely no fucking patience. I'm not waiting for this to dry.

What do you mean it's gonna take like hours to dry? You're really good at it. Drew will do his little layer and walk around the house and like pass the time. I will do the layer and stand up for two seconds and come back and touch it and feel it's wet and be like, fuck. You'll make mud, but like that, the T is-

I literally do make mud. And then it makes mud on the canvas, it's crazy. But T is is you're not supposed to like paint the whole painting. Like you're not supposed to like paint the whole painting. Like you're not supposed to paint a layer and then paint a layer, paint a layer. You're supposed to like do brush strokes, but I don't know.

I, what I do is I water down the oil paint until it becomes like literally just watercolor and I paint with oil paint like it's watercolor. That's I think essentially what I do and I do it because I saw you do it. So then I just thought that's how you do it. Because that's not me is I'm not looking it up. I'm not looking it up.

Give me the fucking shit. And if it happens, it happens. And if I can't do it, then it's not meant to be. I oppose my art. Why are you wearing my fucking shoes? I have my shoe. I just thought I looked pretty in them. Give me no. Give me my fucking shoes.

You freak. Sorry. I just like the way your feet feel on my feet. Even close to delicate enough to fit in those. Delicate, Kai? Back up about my feet. Don't talk about Inyo's feet. Well, okay, if you frame it like that, I guess. Well, yes.

Well, no, I was. Well, insert the video here. Yeah, insert the video. I got it on video, I was watching no the craziest thing of all time is in your witnessed it. I Realized how chopped I am like two days ago I literally started like crashing out like it was really bad bitch a 26 year old man saying Realize how chopped I was I started crashing out like can I shut the fuck up like oh my god But no I like freaked out like I saw me for me for who I really am for the first time the other day

Just every photo I've ever posted every video of me on my phone Like I started going on a deep dive and I was like, oh my god. Everyone lies to me. I'm chopped I'm crazy. That can be how you feel because like I am the most fakes Insecure person ever because at the end of the day, I do think I'm chopped. I'm chopped. That's crazy. That can be how you feel because like I am the most fakes insecure person ever because at the end of the day, I do think I'm hot. I will sit and I will look at my TikToks and my IG and my pics and I'm like, damn, I just like casually walk through life that bad. Like, fuck, I'm literally Michael Jackson bad.

Oh. What? But like- Wait, you're bad like Michael Jackson? No, no, no, no, no. Like what do you do that's like close to Michael Jackson? Why would you compare yourself to Michael Jackson? I'm a fucking pop star and I make the girls go crazy.

Yeah, the little girls. Little girl. Well, oh, this is something else I wanted to bring up that like literally was driving me insane. But yes, we fucking moved. Like, like, like, like. Like what? Like what? Like we weren't trying to hide it. If we were going to hide it from y'all,

we would have done a good job at hiding it. Like we're just overwhelmed and like, we don't have the time to just in the middle of a move, do the, here I go fucking doing the set. I know literally. Look at this shit. What? Like I literally can't.

Like I don't want to. But with that being said, you won't see us for a while. Yeah. Yeah. I'm just checking to make sure it's recording. I'm just doing my job. Oh yeah, no, cause you almost knocked it over. So that's good.

Everything looks perfect from here. If you guys ever get ugly and fall off, I'll tell you and I'll quit. So that's how you'll know. Okay, literally perfect. Waiting for an ugly person to identify another ugly person is way too difficult. So we can't do that.

Who's the other ugly person? Because Kai's the ugly person. No, that's what I'm saying, but Kai can't be looking out for us to turn ugly. He'll let it get far past that. This actually isn't funny, because I am actually ugly. Yeah, Kai's top. The thing is all like three people who know they're good-looking being like I'm so no I

genuinely I Genuinely, I'm not kidding. I look at myself and I actually think I'm heinous. I'm not it's not a bit I see skin melting and rot. Yeah. Well, it depends on the time of the day of it. Skin melting and rotting. Well, it depends on the time of the day. It really depends. Yeah, I do have days. I can't lie. Even princesses have their days. Some days I do see a mirror and it sends a shiver down my back that I can only assume epidural would be able to like sense. Inya's new bathroom's like, it is a cursed space. It literally looks- I think I've really lost her mind in there because it's pushing me.

But like in the best way in like a weird, like sadistic way. It's very Chuck E. Cheese coated. Okay, chill. Not too much on my bathroom. It is Chuck E. Cheese coated. Not too much on my bathroom. I spent a lot of time in there,

but it is really, really freaky. That bathroom is like, I just go through phases with it. Like sometimes I love it, but like, oh! Sometimes, like I- That bathroom is weird. That's go through phases with it. Like sometimes I love it, but like, ooh. That bathroom is weird. That's where I realized how chopped I was. But then I go to my bathroom.

Well also because it has these really old mirrors with very specific lighting in there. I had to put one of those tulip shades over one of the light fixtures because it used to be even brighter in there somehow, but it is covered in mirrors. Whatever fucking crazy bitch, honestly, God bless, because it did something positive for my ego

to see myself from all angles, because I was like, you know what? I'm good looking, like I can chill, but on days when I don't feel like that, I don't need to see. I think your bathroom's cool. I like that it looks like a McDonald's playpen. Like seriously, chill on my bathroom.

And I have just like the most beautiful bathroom. We each have our own bathrooms, which is so gaggy on that. I know, it's really, really, really coded. But I felt like literally a kid who just got V-Bucks saying that. It's terrifying how much time I spend in the bathroom. Like I literally like anytime y'all are like, hey Drew, like you have a question for me.

I'm so insecure because I'm literally always in the bathroom. Like I literally like any time y'all are like, hey Drew, like you have a question for me. I'm so insecure because I'm literally always in the bathroom. Like every time anybody's come to my room, I'm like just chilling in the bathroom. But I know that about you. Like I know you like to spend time in the bathroom. Yeah, it's a given a take though. Your bathroom is so good. It's a given a take because Inya's room is like nice,

cozy, warm, beautiful, like stunning, gorgeous. Her bathroom is terrifying, like deep guttural pits of hell. Really, really cooked. Okay, guys, seriously, because not too much on my bathroom because it's a vibe sometimes. My bathroom is gorgeous, beautiful, stunning, bright, light, skinny, randomly?

And soft light. Soft light. You have this very harsh overhead. I know. There's no shadows. Not a shadow exc sight in the bathroom. Like it's really eerie. But my bedroom is a

dungeness pit that is cold and literally leaking. Well to be fair it's cold because okay, I have never lived in a house with like a banging ass heater. Like I've never, I've never had to live in a location. Like our last place, we had a heater, but it sucked dick and balls. So we just had to freeze. Like you had to live in a location like our last place. We had a heater, but it sucked dick and balls. So we just had to freeze.

Like you had to freeze. Now this place has good heaters. Bitch, I don't give a fuck. But like granted, I think I'm gonna really be brought back to reality when I see that first bill because I've never lived in a place with a heater and Drew is very frugal and very irresponsible and yells at all of us about the heaters. So he would rather be cold and miserable than just like...

No, I just get under a heated blanket and put a hoodie on and like literally I'm so dad coated with the heater, but I'm like, just wait, our bill is going to be like four grand. It's going to be so, it's going to be terrifying. There's no way. It's no, it's going to be expensive. I mean, like it's going to be mad expensive, but we'll see, we'll see, we'll see. But yeah, we moved, lovely house. Like, can't y'all chill?

You'll never get a house tour. I'll say that right now. You'll never see the insides of our house. You might be able to in the YouTube video I have coming out soon, but. Also to be clear because like, although flattered, I don't own anything, okay? There's not a single thing in my life

other than the clothes I've gotten off like my iPad. Also we're renting, we did not buy a home. That's what I'm saying. Everybody has been talking to us like we bought and I've been doing this really bad thing because specifically it's older adults. I do it with older adults too. Who have been talking to me and been like,

oh my God, congrats on the house. Like, when did you buy? And I don't know how to be like, girl, I'm renting. Like my house. Yeah, we did not buy a house. So I just lie. So there are a lot of old people, a lot of old people think I own a house. A lot of old people.

Also, this is the first time I've lived in a neighborhood. Yeah, no, Kai. Jesus fucking Christ. I was sending you something. I was sending you to the group chat so you could look at it and I wouldn't interrupt and then I still fucking interrupted. Because I suck.

Honestly, I suck. Oh wait, Inya, you know what tea is? Like, you know that like, I think something. Wait, what is tea? I don't know what tea is. It's this is tea. So what we should start doing. No, but what is tea? What we should start doing is instead of wet t-shirt contest,

we should do wet brain contest where you like finger the girl's mind by making her read books and seeing how like intelligent she is. Aren't brains technically always wet? Like everything in your body is kind of technically always wet. Like everything in your body is kind of technically always wet. Yeah, but I just want to see the inside of a woman's brain, not her boobs. Like you want to get to know the character of her soul? Exactly. You verbalized it perfectly. You really are that kind of man. Like Drew just doesn't see like women as objects he sees them as

beings yeah exactly also something else isn't it crazy that is like a real sentence that probably has to be said in a lot of places of the US where like on girl shit just being like guys I swear he's normal like he doesn't think you're just a hole like he like he sees people like normal and you know what else just dropped speaking of men thinking of holes or whatever you said, there's a new tick that came out that makes you allergic to meat. But yeah, my memory is going,

like very rapidly my brain is deteriorating at like an alarming rate. Like I don't remember telling, it's specifically with Josiah for some reason, I don't know when he's here and when he's not here and I don't know what I've told him and what I haven't told him and I'll tell him something and he's like, dude, I was literally like with you or like, dude, you've told me that three times now. Yeah, you have. You have been on like a big- Oh my god, I did it with you. Yeah, you have been

forgetting a lot of things. What was it with you? Um, me, it was, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You told me about some interaction you had, and then literally like 30 minutes later, we were in the car and you retold it. I can't remember the interaction, but I know it was with like a woman. It was like a funny interaction you had, and you just retold it to me twice.

And I thought you were dead. I almost started crying. I literally almost started crying. It was so scary. We gotta get you on some memory games. Like what can we do to like get your memory up? Dude, this memory game that I want to play is suck on Inya and Kai's toes challenge

and play with her boobs and dick and balls in vagina challenge. It's apparently really good for like minds that are going away. Is that, it helps? Is that what they do with people? Is that what they be doing? Yeah, I hear that.

I hear that in the- Dude, I mean, if it helps, I'm down. Yeah. You wanna do that right now and we could film it. Yeah. Ew. Like men's toes are fucking disgusting. That's fucking nasty. Mine are nice.

That is so gross. The man that wants to play with my feet. That's a vibe though. Getting your feet played with is a vibe. Like I get that, but like, ew, a man's foot. Oh, are you gonna have to cut that? We'll bleep it. Oh my God.

I'm so upset. And we'll bleep the first, when he said he. I'll bleep it again I guess. Y'all just know. Just know. Just know, just know, just know. A lot has happened in the last eight hours of my life.

I know, serious movie action over here for Drew. It literally sounds fake. When he first was telling me all the things that happened to you, I genuinely thought you were trolling me. I was like, damn, he gets really bored nowadays. The most movie plot, kismet chance encounter like situation ever and I will

not go into detail because I really I can't even say just know it's fucking crazy and nothing like this has ever happened to me in my entire fucking life and I'm just having fun and I was was telling Inya, like I wanna get it. I mean my girl is being love bombed down. Yeah, yeah, exactly. But like it's all in the name of like fun. That's what I was telling Inya, I was like, honestly, like I just like need to get it over with and I need to be in like a toxic like relationship

where we're like yelling at each other and I'm like, come home to Inya and I'm like really sad. And I'm like, Inya, bro, like my man, he just like screamed at me and like I just, I yelled back and I lost control and like, bro, like, my man, he just like screamed at me and like I just I yelled back and I lost control and like, it was so horrible. Imagine a world like the amount of times you've seen me crash out over relationship and like I wouldn't be able to yell. I don't even I literally think I

never yelled in my life. I don't think that's what you think. Have I ever yelled like I've heard you yell. Really? I've never heard you yell. Oh, but my yelling it. I know what you're talking about. It's like, I haven't like I've heard you yell really I've never heard you yell. Oh but my yelling it I know what you're talking about it's like I haven't I haven't heard you yell at a person yeah it's like yelling into the void about a situation that's happening to me. You don't direct it at anybody. Yeah but I was like I need to be in a toxic relationship like I'm not kidding like I really you should. I mean chicken noodle soup is good for the soul Yeah, exactly like the sad truth is we all gotta get it done. Like we all gotta you gotta go through it It sucks girl, like I feel that way too. We feel that way together, but it has to happen and I'm like it should just be Oh y'all also I did like a bunch of like I guess. People were just better fucking people. It quite literally doesn't have to happen. But most people suck dick and balls from the back. They're all evil. They're all evil.

But I did a lot of like soul searching recently and just like thinking. You're playing around the way you talk. You're crazy. Is it really crazy? You're gonna make me insecure. So I did a lot of soul searching. You're gonna make me insecure.

No, no, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's gonna make me insecure. No, no, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It's gonna make me insecure. Because realistically, like every day is a search for my soul. Like every day is a journey to search for my soul. Well, I could, I could, I almost said I could verbalize it different, but you were probably gonna make fun of me for that too.

I could word it differently. Oh my God, painting yourself as the victim, of course. You are literally, you are my toxic relationship. Yeah. You're talking about, oh, I need to be in one in one I'm right here. Yeah we're toxic to each other. Hey guys we want to take a quick break to thank one of today's sponsors Liquid IV. Every day I wake up and I'm putting electrolytes in my body. I need to do it no matter how much water I think I'm having a day. I will be having electrolytes because they genuinely make me feel like I'm actually absorbing all of the water I drink all day. I've been sleeping with a heated blanket and I wake up soaking wet. Like I literally think I pissed my sheets.

I literally think I pissed the bed at night. That's how wet, so I'm like terrifyingly parched. But I drink Liquid IV every single morning. I fill up my water bottle and I put a raspberry, is it sugar-free? I think it's a sugar-free raspberry lemonade. That's the one I've been drinking. In my big ass jug of water and I sit there and chug it, which is probably, actually I got told by a doctor

that I should stop drinking all of the water and I should have for the day all at once because I drink it all at one time. And then I pee it. And then I pee it all out and he's like, you're dehydrated permanently. But that's why you have liquid IV to save the day all at once, because I drink it all at one time. Yeah, and then you pee it. And then I pee it all out, and he's like, you're dehydrated permanently. But that's why you have Liquid IV to save the day. Exactly.

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and just see if there's an appointment. It's like those apartment websites. Like I scroll through and look at all the listings. Like this, I literally like scroll through and just look at the doctors. Cause it kind of is shocking. Like how many doctors are on there? And also like, why is there actually eight million appointments?

Like I always thought getting a doctor would be so hard and ZocDoc has shown me how easy it is. So you guys should stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to ZocDoc.com slash intercom to find an instantly book, a top rated doctor today. That's Z-O-C-D-O-C dot com slash intercom. ZocDoc.com slash intercom. But I, what I was gonna say is I was doing a lot of soul searching, but I'll rephrase it. I was thinking a lot about the past hookups that I've had when I was literally a fucking child and how fucking crazy, how crazy that shit was.

I just realized things. Yeah, I think also it is just so interesting to see somebody go through. I mean, I have a lot of friends who are our age, especially because of the again, I hate saying shit like this, but dating nowadays it genuinely like it's so fucking annoying, but really it is an a decision issue or like too many decisions leads to like no decision at all. And I feel like a lot of people are having that in terms of romantic, but also I'm sorry.

I don't know if like I am just really lucky and I really, really, really, really, really need to chill with saying this, but I genuinely think it's cause most people are too pussy to just say, like, can you fucking speak your mind? That's like, that's like, can you seriously just say what the fuck is up? What topics you got over there, babe? What do you got to talk about?

Well, I have, I've been doing a lot of soul searching as well, but mainly in terms of also, I swear I'm not making fun of you because I know, I know, I know, I'm playing every time. My life is going to Drew's room every night and saying some shit that I feel like I just found out about life and yelling it on a tangent to Drew about it. And really what I'm talking about is like, I had a good day today cause I got flowers. Okay. Like buying flowers, bitches are alive once. Really?

No, legitimately y'all, if y'all want to have a good day, go and buy fresh flowers for yourself and make a bouquet. Yeah. Like, and then make a bukkake or whatever you wanna call it. Because that really, really made me so happy. No, it set off the, like yesterday, not to brag, I had the perfect day.

I had the perfect day. I woke up and had therapy. Then we went to the farmer's market and got flowers. We came home, I cleaned the kitchen as a good wife would do on a Sunday morning. Praise the Lord. Good wife, more like a good female. We keep going.

Woman. I'm a female and a female is a bitch and a bitch is a female dog and dogs are the most loyal and dog is a man's best friend. Wow. Do you remember that? I've never heard that before. Wait, you've never heard that?

I know boys are stupider and go to Jupiter or whatever. It's when a guy would call you bitch in school and you'd be like, yeah, well, bitches are female dogs and dogs are like the most loyal animals to man. So you're actually a fucking idiot because I'm literally the smart. Like it was some stupid shit. I wonder if anybody else did that or if like that was something me and my friends made up because there was a lot of shit like that

that I said as a kid and I'm realizing I have had the disease from a very young age where Rain has pointed this out and we all do it to each other but we will just start quoting things to each other and it's not from anything. It literally is just a random thing. Like the Huzzah thing.

I don't know where that came from. I don't know why I started thinking Huzzah. I quoted from the girl in the grocery store that sees a rat on this stack of sodas. Huzzah, huzzah! Yeah, that one. And then, but Doinkadoink came from Bazinga and Huzzah like I wanted my own catchphrase. Oh wait.

But doink a doink. Yo, can we make that a thing like damn. No, I really. Can we get that trending? I don't think but doink a doink. Gaff got a little bit of traction. Yeah. Like I'm still gaffing all over the place all the time.

Yeah. So like I'm gaff, I have a gaffitude to me. That can't be taken. Wow. If you're driving reckless with a baby on board sign, how about this, fuck you and that fucking baby. I don't give a fuck about the baby on board because if you're driving recklessly

with that fuck ass sticker on your car, why do I have to care about your baby? You don't give a fuck about the baby. I'm gonna grab the car off the road. I'm gonna break your laptop. What? Oh, have I not premiered these? I haven't debuted these yet.

No, you haven't. Oh my God, Kai, that's so good of you to bring up. Do you have them? I have them, yeah. Can we watch them? So I'll give a little backstory. See is, I made these videos. Backstory completed.

No, he was in a bad ass mood. This is the kind of yelling Drew gets up to. Yeah, I was in a, like, I wasn't in a bad mood, but I was in this like mental purgatory, like where I like really was like, oh, none of this is real. I can just do whatever the fuck I want. If I wanted to, I'd scream at people.

You're so stupid. And so I made all these videos while I was driving and listening to the Challenger soundtrack. You're so stupid. Why am I being left on screen alone? I sent him to the group chat, so you guys can watch over there. He just wants to be next to you. Oh yeah.

He's. All right, here's the video guys. Go! Oh my God! Go! Oh I It's not done y'all You almost fucking killed me! What the fuck? Oh! I'm gonna find your fucking family! Pulling out in front of me! No, the crazy thing about these videos is they completely derailed my day because I was like we were moving while we were doing them and it literally like it put

me in such a weird headspace and my throat hurt I literally tasted blood like after is tasted a word I tasted blood yeah that's a word that I tasted blood you tasted a word I was like wow I'm just thinking at the beginning you saying I don't know if I've ever yelled. Yeah. No, I didn't like seriously yell. Like yelling at people. I feel like, ow, motherfucker. The thing is, it's crashing out. The hang it all is crashing out right now.

D1 level crash out. This is another one. The lighting looks crazy by the way. No! This is when you haven't. Get the fuck out! You haven't seen another one. The lighting looks crazy, by the way. No! This is one y'all haven't... Get the fuck out! Y'all haven't seen that one. Whoa!

No, I literally love them. Wait, I'm gonna do one more. I have another one somewhere. We saw this one. No! Oh wait, maybe this is... The fact that there's so many You know, what's crazy is yesterday. I'm going to watch the fucking work these days. You don't sound like you.

I know. It's like a pit. I know, it's really scary. It's really creepy. Did you feel good after that? No, it ruined my day. I feel like I had the realization that I had never screamed over the course of like 15 years.

Like since I was like a little boy. Yeah, I don't think I've ever heard you be loud. You haven't been loud ever once. And I tried, because like I was at my sister's house. Wait, scream right now. No, no. No, why are you making me kind of embarrassed? It is.

So I screamed at my sister's house because I was just there alone. It's like a house in the middle of nowhere. And I lost my voice for like two days. Oh. Like immediately. Well those are those 48 year old vocal cords. No, they're not 48.

I think my vocal cords just don't have the like muscles to do that. Yeah, I mean, cause I wore them bitches out. Whoa. It's true, yeah. You looking around. It's true, I gave Drew the type of head where he has to wipe his ass after. Well, I love screaming and if I couldn't scream anymore, I would kill myself. I love raising my voice.

One thing about Anya, she's going to raise her voice. Yeah, I don't have any control. My dad is the loudest. My mom and dad are the loudest people I have ever heard in my life. And up until recently, I never thought of how loud I was and how much I took that from them. When I went back home recently, my little sister was like, oh my God, when you talk, you're just like mom and dad. You like scream when you talk, you're always so loud.

Like never let a 16 year old perceive you and then tell you directly to your face how they're perceiving it. Because that did something to my core. I feel like if you even go back on episodes, I have been trying my best to watch my volumes since she said that, but. You haven't been trying hard enough.

Oh my God. Well, to be fair, I think my ears got blown out. I can't lie. Like in my head right now, I'm having like a very, very like, I like to me, I'm like at a- Dude, Inya's ears are so bad. Like she's fully, she's fully like hard hearing at this point. Like we'll be driving in the car and like the music will be

like the loudest music I've ever heard in my life. And she's like, do you mind if I like turn it up a lot more? Because I can barely hear this and I'm like Inya you're actually no I I like unironically I think I it's specifically my right ear I think I blew it out I have like a constant just like like small ringing in this ear and this ear always feels like someone has a bowl over the side of my head like I can hear out of it. It's clogged ear wax probably. Yeah, I need to go get my ears cleaned. You should get them cleaned. I clean my ears all the time guys,

but you know what I got told last time I went to go get my ears checked? I'm one of those evil people who I clean my ears too much. So I actually hurt my ear because I like, I get like really feaky about it. Like because I'm so scared of having. Well, cause I'm so scared of having dirty ears because I will never forget when I was seven,

I watched my godmom clean my godbrothers ears in the back of their pickup truck sitting outside in broad daylight. So imagine Miami sun in the middle of the summer. We were all running around. It was the kid I was closest in age to. And she, oh my God, this is actually such a sweet memory. She would clean her kids ears and then clean our ears.

So we would all take turns and she would like clean our ears, but one time I watched her clean my godbrothers ears and I'm not even, like, oh. Like gross. Like a sight to remember. Wow. Like genuinely from that moment on, I have been using Q-tips in my ears since I was way too young.

I would sneak into my parents bathroom and clean my ears because seeing that scared me so bad. And also it made me laugh so hard at him that I was petrified of ever being humiliated like that because literally imagine like the most like annoying kids you could imagine me and my god siblings like I got so blessed because our like god family setup was exactly like our family setup so there was like a middle girl, a younger boy and like an older brother and that was like basically the same as our family except it was a younger sister but like all of the correct ages got along so well so it's like all these kids who are mirroring each other we lived across the street from each other so we were all

so similar imagine me and a bunch of little other badass elementary kids students watching you get your ears cleaned and it's dirty. Like it was like humiliation ritual. So basically long winded story to say that. That happened to me with Dan Drift. Dan Drift. Yeah, I was a kid. I had Dan Drift in like, I think it was like fifth grade or something like that.

Oh no, for some reason having Dan Drift as a kid was really, really bad. It was the worst thing that's ever happened to me in my entire life. We were sitting in like the gymnasium, like at a pep rally or like where teachers were talking at us and we were sitting in the stands. Teachers were talking at us.

Yeah. And like, uh, my friend, he was literally trying to impress like these girls that we were friends with. And uh, he like just like blatantly just pointed out like that I had dandruff, like really bad dandruff. And it rewired my brain in a way that like I still have not recovered from. And if I see dandruff, like it's literally a thing that just happens, like people can't control it.

It's not a big deal, but like that. Because I'm in my dandruff era. Anytime I see like dandruff on someone, I like really want to tell them or like whatever. But I'm like, I kept making those faces because I thought about like when I was younger, I literally, it's like, like chewing on Q-tips. Oh, I thought you were about to say dandruff.

No, no, like chewing on like not used Q-tips, just like regular Q-tips and that like cotton like scrunching in your teeth. Why were you chewing on Q-tips? I'm not kidding. I think I had like Pika or some shit cause I would eat paper and like chew. I would chew on like wood and shit.

It was so crazy. I was definitely, yeah, I guess I was putting random like weird shit into my stomach that I shouldn't have been putting in there. I was trying to think of how to say that without sounding crazy. Cause yeah, we've talked about this. I used to eat chargers.

I used to eat Android chargers. Android chargers were the best. They were literally the best. And then that just makes me really think about who I am as a person today. And I'm like, damn, I wonder if I was low key just sending micro, like I was kind of just electrocuting myself.

That's what I liked. Cause the charger had to be plugged in. It had to be plugged in to get that taste. And the taste in question was literally electrocution. Like it was literally like, it would zap the end of my. We really used to just lick nine volt batteries. Like, do kids still do that? Like that shit was lit.

I know, like I don't think they do as much anymore and what's, no, that's, that literally isn't true. A child's curiosity doesn't change. There's just more things to be curious about. Like I'm sure, because when I remember when Madeline was talking about baby proofing the house, bitch, I thought we were past that time. Like what, we still have to baby proof the house.

Like what is the baby getting into? But then I look at the floor and I'm like, yeah, we could kill at least three infants with the amount of tiny things. They would just crawl in here and die. But I'm gonna kill myself. Thank God. Did you see what I said in the group chat? Thank God is like obsessive texting us today. We're just I'm trying to not be intrusive to your guys's energy, but also send you stuff. Hey guys, we wanted to take a quick break to thank a sponsor of today's episode, Shopify. We love you Shopify. We love you.

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Shopify.com slash intercom. Wait Kai. Oh yeah. You need to talk about the fucking movie that you're in. Oh yeah, I'm in a movie. Kai's in a fucking movie. Wait, I thought we were gonna talk about your painting. Oh, we can talk about that.

Like this, but. Wait, what movie? I got a comment on a TikTok and it was like, I'm not saying the name of the fucking movie, but. Oh my God. It was like, you're in this, you're a part of like, you're a dating app profile in this movie. And I was like, I don't know anything about that.

Must be a doppelganger. I looked it up and this movie that's like on streaming services and I'm not fucking saying the name of it. Wait, is this real? This is real. I am like, they use my photo and she's like, I think she's like a girl that like meets up with guys

and kills them through dating apps or something. But I was one of the profiles that she like swiped. It's like literally his picture. It's him the one standing in the stairwell. Yeah. Oh so small claims court it is. Exactly. And the reason well I'm not even mad about that. I'm not even mad about that. The reason why I'm angry is because they put my age as 30 and that's really fucked up. Wow that's really fucked up no, it's not. Don't say that about him. Yeah. Technically that's my biological age, but I have like the very young guy. Yeah. He's a very young, chill guy.

Very like super immature and stuff. Or like, what? Yeah, exactly. Did she swipe on you? Did you get, oh, I didn't even think about that. She didn't. Yeah, you got, you got literally like publicly rejected. She saw you and said, ew. Yeah, they used, not only did they use your photo without your consent, but they publicly were like,

paaah. I sue them for not swiping right and putting my age as my actual age. If you just like change the movie where she swipes on me, I won't sue you. Yeah, just edit it. You should do that, yeah. I'm pretty sure like, yeah, I won't sue you. Yeah, just edit it. You should do that. Yeah, I'm pretty sure like, yeah, just have them AI it.

I got mad and I crashed out. Ty was tweaking out. It sucks too because like if I was in the movie, they probably would have been like, they probably would have just found my picture naturally because I'm so like popular and whatnot. And then been like, oh my God, this girl is so good looking, but this just doesn't work because we wouldn't swipe on her. We would want her in the movie. So then I would be in the movie. Yeah. And that's the difference between us.

Also the T is just me and in urine euphoria. I don't think we're supposed to talk about that. No, they tweeted about it. All of us were. I directed it and he wrote it, I directed it. And he wrote it. I wrote it, yeah. I actually did like a weird power play and I kicked Sam Levinson out and now- Good.

I mean, you won. I won, no. You made him up. Yeah, we got casted in euphoria as Rue's trip sitters. People were being so shady in the comments, they were like, yeah, casted as the janitors. That would be a vibe. Oh my God. I started watching Abbott Elementary and because of that janitor, I would love to be the janitor. That's like the perfect character

for me to play. Like I just show up and I say something and then I disappear for the rest of the episode. That's like in my head, that's my ideal rule to play in a show. I just want to be on a show and have no, like you don't even need to give me much. I just want to like be passing or like I don't want to have a purpose. Like I really just want to be like a room filler but like a kind of consistent room filler. Isn't Abbott Elementary so good? It is so fucking fun. There's not enough conversation around how perfect of a TV show. I know I need to start it from the beginning because I started watching random episodes because I hadn't seen it before.

And fuck, I kind of fucked up and I watched like, I watched some of their best episodes because I literally just looked up what were the best episodes because I feel like I'm so behind on shows in general. I don't know why I did that. I really, I mean, it's kind of Rain's fault, Loki. So that's Rain's fault.

Because she was like, this is a really good episode. But also that I just know certain people. I'm the kind of person who I like to watch a show from top to bottom, but that's me. Top and bottom. From, oh, I like to watch the show from Drew to Kai. Yeah, thank God. Yep.

That was good. I just put my finger in my mouth and then touched you. What we were going to say before, so Drew, you know I'm always saying that your body is a work of art. I'm trying to compliment you. So what's fucked up is like the way y'all interact is genuinely kind of just the way y'all talk to each other. I think I've heard y'all have like two normal conversations.

Well, no, no, no. And every time y'all are texting each other, I'll be like, oh, what made you laugh? Like, what are you laughing about? And it's some weird shit you sent him or vice versa. I know. I don't know. I was speaking Kai's language. Oh, wait. When you learn, is that your Valentine's Day gift?

Yeah, that's his native tongue. A pig snort? I just don't understand. Wait, what is he saying, Kai? Saying like, what are you talking about? Like, what's the next topic of the podcast? But it doesn't matter. That's, I think he's being mean. That's actually sweet. It's so sweet. He went out and he learned your language.

Aw, Duolingo. Well, I have fucking carpenter ants. So thanks guys. That's why I didn't want to say anything about the move because I have fucking carpenter ants. And I wake up every and I wake up every I wake up every morning to buzzing sounds It's like yeah Also literally or how sexy of a man I am like I'm like a real

Like this this is like a compliment to both of us in my head, but I will start with you. I'm like a real man. People genuinely ask how me and Drew work so well together. And it is because there are just certain roles we play in each other's lives that we take that role and we accept. Like even when it annoys you,

or I might just be speaking for you because he does like a lot of like house, like Drew will take care of a house. Like this is a man who he will tend to the house. We are kind of like the, what's that? Like hot couple Levi and Coraline. William. William.

I mean, me saying Levi and Coraline, that's just her name. Like that's her full name. I was just stalking them yesterday. They're such a fucking vibe, bro. But like we are that, but minus the cooking. That's not happening. Actually, no, my man cooked me.

Oh wait, I literally cooked. He cooked me a yummy ass pasta and I fucked it up. I got the exterminators coming in tomorrow to get her ants out and I cooked her a pasta dinner. So you made the salad. No, this is my man. My man, my man, my man. But I genuinely think we only work so well together because you do

that kind of shit. And then I do. I actually don't know what I do. You don't do much. No, I'm kidding. You do a lot. I clean the rest of the house. I keep the house tidy. I like clean your room four times a day. Yeah, my OCD in that room has really gotten to me guys. I'm being guilt-capped in. Every night the ghost of this house tells me to clean. I know. And I literally can't stop.

And like it'll be like 2 a.m. and I'll like be like cozy and bed about to fall asleep and I'll be like falling into sleep like this and then I'll hear a broom go. Cause she's right above me. I hear everything from Inya. Literally everything, every Azul footstep. Also.

Have you heard unwanted sounds? No, I haven't. I haven't heard that yet. But. Yeah. Inya's very heavy footage. She's very, very heavy footage. She stomps around, she's heavy footage.

Why the fuck are you nodding your head? Yes, bitch. I'd be like. No, I'm not kidding. No, guys, there's seriously nothing graceful about me. Like, I don't know what I'm gonna do. No, you can turn it on and off. But no, Inya stomps. Not for long.

Inya stomps in her room. My, like, gracefulness battery is the equivalent to when you buy an old digital camera and you use flash three times. Like, that's like the amount in which I can hold myself to be classy. Yeah. But yeah, and yeah, like you're not heavy-footed.

You just walk on your heels. No, I'm heavy-footed. Yeah. I stomp around and I try. And I really like what's fucked up is I try my day. You don't try. Sometimes I do. Well, it also doesn't help because like, I've said this before and it's the corniest thing ever.

But y'all seriously, if more people just listen to a song on repeat that they really liked and dance around their room, I think everybody would be happy. And that doesn't help for you because I blast my music and I stomp around my room. Like I really am the noisemaker. And you're like the annoying roommate. But I do such good things. You do amazing things. I got a table.

Mm-hmm, two. And I got us a bunch of rugs. I have to show them to you. No, you didn't. I haven't seen them yet. Well, I found out that I'm tongue-tied. Damn, they thought that show was funny as fuck. I know.

I got the whole neighborhood laughing. Yeah, I found out I'm tongue-tied. What does that mean? And that's probably why I like miss words all the time. Oh, that's a medical term? Yeah, there's like this line. Like basically, if you open your mouth all the way, like as wide as you can go,

and then try to touch the roof of your mouth with your tongue. If you can't touch the roof of your mouth with your tongue, you're tongue touch the roof of your mouth with your tongue you're tongue tied. I'm not. Oh I am tongue tied then. I can't do that. Yeah. Oh God! Jesus Christ that's so fucking nasty.

Wait do I- Y'all really just are so weird. Like y'all are weird people by the way. Why is that weird? You have to blur- Do you have white tongue cap? You have to blur my tongue. You have to blur my tongue. I just have a pale tongue. I swear. I have a really pale tongue. I've been smoking too long.

I feel like, do you know what? I feel like some people have smokers tongue and I really need to stop smoking so much because I'm pushing it and I just don't think you could get that medically done. Does my tongue look weird? Ew, Kai.

Do that in front of the camera. Why are you running? Is this weird, y'all? Kai, whatever anxiety medicine you're on now is working too fucking well. Like, I'm kidding though, that was mean. You are, today you are such a ray of sunshine. Thank you. And I also-

Blessing. Even if I have anxiety, why would I keep my gift from people and show them that I can do stuff like that? Yeah, and yeah, that was really crazy. Yeah, that's actually crazy. It's so nasty. A lot of people think that that's cool that I can do that.

It is awesome. And I know everyone agrees. I made the roof of my mouth, like I feel like I tickled my, like that area. Do you know what I mean? Like now it like itches. Yeah, cause I was like touching it. Yeah, when I pet a cat and their whiskers

like touch my forearm, I feel it on the roof of my mouth. I don't know how to describe it. That's really weird. And if someone presses my belly button, I feel it in my penis tip. That happens to me too. Yeah, I feel that. I feel that way too.

We feel that way together. Yeah, we feel that way together. No, when I touch my belly button, it kind of hurts. Oh, what I was going to say before, but then you interrupted me rudely. Oh, get out. Actually, hold this. Yeah, you got him, come on. Oh my God.

I've never been hit there before. Drew just slapped me in the gooch and honestly I didn't hate it. What I was gonna say was that your body is a piece of art. It's tea, it's a piece of art, and somebody put it in a gallery. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

Someone painted me, guys. Someone did a big oil painting, did their big one with it. I love a good oil painting. Oil, oil. I love a good, do I say good oil painting. Like, I love a good, do I say oil? I love good oil paint. I like had to cut oil for my vocab because I realized I literally did lose my Texas accent because I used to say like, oh I have to put oil in my car. Oil. Someone painted me knocked out on the front, it honestly is it is a beautiful painting and also

there's like a lot of meaning behind i know i was gonna say because that was like the last night you ever drank like that's on video yeah it's like it's an iconic moment it's like a it's a uh uh a lens into my it's a lens into my sobriety. Wait, Kai, what's their name? Jaseña? Or Ha-Zen-ya? Ha-Zen-ya? We'll flash it on the screen. I've never seen that name.

Beautiful name, girl. Gorgeous, gorgeous gowns. No, but shout out to you. That painting was fucking lit. It's so good. Also, how long did it take? Because I really don't understand how you can make an oil painting that big

because I can't. I have no idea, but we'll insert the IG account. Well, if when I'm old, if I ever see a video of myself being recorded by a younger person from far away and they're pitting me online, I'm not kidding. I will go out of my way and do meth and kill that person with my bare hands.

Because let me find out anybody is just like pitting me. I'm not kidding. I will go out of my way and do meth and kill that person with my bare hands. Because let me find out anybody is just like pitting me. In my head, my ideal situation is somehow I have grandkids, but they're probably not my grandkids. They're like y'all's grandkids, which makes them my grandkids. And I'd be down for them to record me because I'm funny. Like the right right lady.

Like that's a vibe. But bitch, if you see me struggling to pick some shit up. Did you know the right right was a bit? Oh yeah, I know it's like a whole video they recorded and then the- Yeah, they cut. Yeah, they like cut it up. But that's what I'm saying, she's like still such a funny lady.

If I'm struggling to pick something up and instead of fucking helping me, your piece of shit ass is filming me, the amount of TikToks I see like that like Poor old person and it's like them trying to put something in their car bitch go help them like literally why are you recording them? Yeah, no, i'm gonna be like my Grandkids like holy grail like i'm gonna be like that one grandma on tiktok that like her Grandkid like feeds her lines to say that's what they're i'm just gonna be so geriatric and like rotted by them that like I'm just gonna be saying like all of the young slang

and like crashing out I'm gonna be like baddie winkle which actually can someone please tell me like if baddie okay like I'm not kidding because I like I reference her a lot and I looked it up recently and I couldn't find any updated photos of her so I don't know and if baddiewinkle isn't here with us anymore honestly it does make me sad. That is a really big loss. That does make me sad because like oh no it's grannywinkle I always say baddiewinkle it's grannywinkle. Grannywinkle no I think it's baddiewinkle. Something like that it's some weird ass name. And honestly, let me find out Oh Mighty or Oh My Weekend

or whatever the fuck didn't cut her the fattest check ever because I'm beating everybody up. Because that was the girl. She was literally the poster girl for a brand for teen girls. Like she's kind of lit for that. Yeah. And the last thing I'll bring up is

we obviously filmed the episode in Big Sur for last week and it was beautiful. No, that was, we weren't in Big Sur. We were in fucking what's it called? We were in Paris, Texas. Yeah, we were in Paris, Texas. It was beautiful. It was beautiful.

But in Big Sur, I crashed out. Big Sur, I crashed out. I had like a real life like seeing red moment and I won't go into too much detail, but basically I was trying to be nice to someone and I asked them about the weather because there was a really gnarly weather storm coming in and I was just like, oh, like just making sure she knew, making sure like we were on the same page.

Also we both grew up in places that were affected by extreme weather and that is a casual thing. Like when a hurricane was about to hit Miami, when you go to Publix to get something and be like, oh, like how are you feeling for the storm? Are you ready? Like is everything good? Like have you been keeping up with it?

So I just was making casual conversation. I mean, I should have known better because from the jump, it was like, get out of my city. You don't belong here. Yeah, she did not fuck with us. Yeah, it was really gnarly. And there was a moment where I tried to, or she asked me how I wanted to pay,

and I was like, oh, do you do Apple Tap? Because literally I had my wallet and I had cash and a card in there, but it was literally stuck in my back pocket. And had to like take my pants off to get my wallet out so I was like hopefully she takes Apple pay because I know she's gonna be so mad if I like Try to get that yeah, I struggle and so I go to like tap because it says you can tap now and she Pushes my hand and phone out of the way and then she's like, you tap when I tell you to tap. And I was like, okay.

And then like a second later, she's like, okay, tap now. I tap. She also said, I was like, do you take Apple Pay? And she was like, unfortunately. Which is just such bad energy. But I'm still trying to kill her with kindness. I'm still trying to be nice. And I talked to her about the weather

and she mutters something under her breath, like super angrily, like really mad. And I was like, oh God, what would you say? And she was like, no, no, no, no. And I was like, what? And she said, I said, check the Doppler. I'm not your Doppler radar. And I was like, oh.

In that moment, I like saw red and like, I was so angry. I'm gonna beat this bitch up. Yeah, no, literally that one audio and y'all like I said heinous heinous things not directly to this woman but in earshot of this woman and I like I said some really vile hateful things that I regret but like don't be mean to me I was just being so nice I was literally like having such a good day. I remember thinking, I'm about to beat this bitch up. I'm about to beat this bitch up. I literally.

I'm about to beat this bitch up. I remember thinking, I'm about to beat this bitch up. I'm about to beat this bitch up. But yeah, and like I was like probably 30 yards away, like saying these things so she could hear because Inya and Josh had gone to the library, like right next door. And yeah, I know.

She already didn't fuck with our vibe. Like the second we pulled up, it was this weird ass gas station that still has you like pump your gas and then you pay, which I am so sorry. She kept saying, oh, like old fashioned times. And that's when I knew her funky ass was being fucking weird for no reason. Because that's the first thing

she said. She was like, Oh, like the old times, like the way it's supposed to be. She was so shady from the jump. Yeah, because I went up to pay and she was like, No, you pump first like the old fashion times. Well, I like I snapped back before I crashed out and I'm like, sorry, I was just trying to make casual conversation, sorry. And then she was like, she kind of reset a little bit and was like, oh, I was being mean.

And then she turned it up to level 10 and was like, well, you do know this weather affects real lives and our lives are actually affected by this weather up here. And she just went off on me for 30 seconds about about it and then I was just like whatever and I just like walked away and then she knew she fucked up because as we were driving away she like tries to like make things right and she goes she looks at um looks at me and I'm making eye contact with her the whole time because I'm like she I wish I could like show you how mean she was to me But I really don't want to go there because it actually still affects me. I was shaking in a we were driving away

and she like knew she fucked up and so she looks at me and she's like and I keep staring at her and she's trying to wave at me and then she's like Because I'm not waving back like don't play with me. Well also I think because you were upset and then she I think she got scared when me and Josh came back because she heard you telling us what had happened and I think in her head she was like oh I'm about to have to prep to like go against like 320 something year olds but here I go arguing with a bitch like you. Ew you fucking nasty, fucking putrid, fucking nasty, bitter, fucking negative bitch. No, literally Here I go arguing with a bitch with rotten meth teeth. No, literally. Also, uh, new law.

I think should be passed. Not actually not law. I'm just going to start doing it. I think this summer I'm going to push old mean white people into a well. That's that to me sounds like a correct punishment for evil, nasty, fucking white people is like not the kind of well that's going to kill you. But I want a well with enough water to like to cushion your fall a little bit. And you don't really have to swim while you're down there and waiting for help.

But I really want to tell old white people to go look into a well and then push them in it. And I want it to be like a spring day. I want it to be beautiful outside, but the sun to be perfectly pointed so that when they fall in the well, the sun is shining directly on them. So they get sunburn on the top half of their body.

That's not being saved by water or protected by water. And then the hot summer sun is so hot though, that it evaporates the water while it's above them. And then like it's a place in the US where it gets really cold at night. So then they have to be freezing and soaked and sunburned. I is correct punishment. I think I fully, fully, fully, fully, fully support that. Yeah. Like, is that not perfect?

Next time you piss me off, I'm going to literally get a well built in my room like that goes down to your bedroom. And when you're in my room, I'm going to push you into the well and you're in my room, I'm gonna push you into the well and you have to stay there until I lock, unlock the door from the other side. That is a fucking vibe, bro. Okay. Like.

What? It's just like, is it though? Cause it's like not. I think it's a vibe. I like swimming. I think I wanna rip your shirt off with my teeth. Yeah, period. Just that.

And play with you. Thank you. Thank you. Sorry, y'all that really, I just started thinking about- I know, I feel like it put you back in that place. It really put me back in the place and so I have to lift ourselves out of it with some Psiops. You should just lift yourself out of it with-

Drew's, it's Drew's Psiops. It's P psyops. You should just lift yourself out of it. Drew's. It's Drew's Psyop. It's Psyop. Fuck, wait. It's Drew's Psyop. Psyop, fuck. It's Drew's Psyop. Drew's Psyop.

Drew's Psyop. Drew's Psyop. Were you practicing? Did you practice that? No, I just was coming up with it on the spot. Oh. It was pretty good though, right? I mean, you kept like,

it sounded like you were messing up. Do I got to dress up as a vape to get sucked on around here? Yeah. Men out here wearing Nike head to toe with a dick that just can't do it. That's good, that's good. No car, but you're going around telling everybody's business. Okay, walkie talkie.

That's just a certified classic. That was just you for the first four years of being in LA. Wait, this is such a certified classic that I can't believe I haven't said yet. Why does McDonald's Sprite taste like a screenshot? If butt isn't supposed to be eight, then why is it already cut in half? Shut the fuck up.

This homeless man's sign said, one day it could be you, so I put my dollar back in my pocket just in case the motherfucker was right. I think my bones are cracking, like are done. Does that make sense? Like the way my like cartilage cracks in all of my joints, I'm cooked. We clock the tea we think we deserve. Shut the fuck up. Unemployed people always want to fight. Go punch a clock and knock out eight hours.

That was good. I'm so jealous of people who know how to shut up. I shut up and subtitles come out of my face. Bitch. Okay, I'll do, I'll find one more. I have a talking disease, I think. Something's wrong with me. You have a talking disease. I literally do. I'm the first woman to have the talking disease. Can you believe they would just kill bitches who talked as much as me in the olden days? Like I would be dead a long time ago. They'd be like, all right, we got to get this bitch out of here. I can't get over the fact that the word gullible backwards spells cat.

You're so annoying. Whatever. That's all I got. No, didn't Josh give you a good one yesterday? Oh, he said Mr. Beast more like Mr. Boast. That guy's so full of himself. And then I countered back and said, Mr. Beast more like Mr. Least. He's giving away all his money.

Ha ha ha ha. Fuck Mr. Beast, like on a real note, fuck Mr. Beast. I fucking hate that bitch. Stupid fucking bitch. We need to make a Mr. Beast dish track. Oh, coming soon. Yeah, we'll debut it when we come back. Oh my God, guys, we're not gonna see each other

for a while. They have no idea. We're leaving you guys for a month. Unironically, not a bit. Yeah. We need some time. I need some space from you. It's not you.

It's me. It's not you, it's us. Yeah, it's us. I mean, you are really toxic and hateful and mean to me and you yell in my face, but I like that. Yeah, sometimes I need that so that's okay but like you just like you like me too much and I don't really feel like I can handle that right now so I think I need to like uh not talk to you for a month. Let's go a month no contact um and then recoup. You're gonna you're gonna be like oh my god month no contact uh but you're gonna see

everything I post and be like fuck I wish we could talk and then I'm gonna be back in Oh my god, month, no contact. But you're gonna see everything I post and be like, Fuck, I wish we could talk and then I'm gonna be back in a month. You're gonna like, get like a dopamine rush like I'm back. So I am. I love you though. And I love you so much. And I'm really gonna miss you. And like you mean the most to me. And I'm not love bombing you. But I just can't be around you because you're a lot right now. Right now. Just right now but I'll definitely be back in a month because I'm gonna need my ego brushed up and boosted so please be here in a month please please please because I love you. Legitimately though we are taking a month off or like three weeks or something like that I don't know

the exact amount of time, three episodes. But we'll be back. We just need to recuperate. We've had a stressful, stressful few months, like not even work, work has been chill, but just in real life. And we got some things that we need to take care of and handle with, with our families and our friends

and our relationships. So we'll be back. We'll be back. I'm back and I'm better. I want you bad as ever. Don't let me set up. I don't know the lyrics. Wanna give you forever.

Sex with me's amazing. So amazing. Media though, right? Sorry for killing the vibe at the very end of the episode. Oh, I know. It was like a breakup. We kind of just had our closure talk because at the beginning we started it

and then we kind of brushed over it because we didn't want to remind each other why we were here. Yeah. Maybe we clip it and put it in the beginning. Just break your heart early. Yeah, just get over it. Because no one's gonna fucking see that.

Does anybody watch the end? If you watch to right now. No one's watching at this point. We can do whatever we want. If you watch right now, comment poopy poopy butt in the comments. Oh my God, poopy poopy butt. Oh my god, poopy poopy butt.

Okay, but yeah, I will, it will be sad, but it will be worth it. Me thanks, the break. Yeah, I thought I was gonna cry saying it because there's a lot of emotions behind it. I haven't cried on the podcast since Madeline. I looked at Madeline and she was a mother. I need to cry on here again. What should I cry about? My FSRIs do this fun thing where like I cry since Madeline I looked at Madeline and she was a mother I need to cry on here again

This fun thing where like I cry Only in huge explosions now, I don't do my casual crying the way I used to media I got LV sandals by DJ s kid or s DJ kid or SD kid Jesus Christ the winner is from the Little Miss Sun sign trout soundtrack Telephono ta to condo by DJ Yeah, I don't know I don't know what the lyrics are to this song, so they could be very problematic, but I love this song. Oh, this shit's fucking Brazilian or what?

Yeah. Portuguese. Hey! Telefono tá tocando. ["Telefono Tá Tocando"] I'm really just letting it play and looking at this cover because it's easily the worst cover I've ever seen. Bro, let me show- oh. I have a SoundCloud playlist which is so insane to say in 2025, but Violet made it for me. It was like her- it's all her Brazilian DJ music that she played in Japan.

Um, and the covers of those songs are the most insane things I've ever seen in my entire life. Like the words- That's when you know the song is about to be good. Yeah, it's like literally hole in the wall restaurant vibes. Like it's like the good shit. Um- Sticky menu vibes. Yeah, sticky menu vibes. Wait, I watched something that I was like, oh, I need to talk about that, but it doesn't matter.

Well, my media of the week is this. I didn't even do mine yet, Kai. So back up. Back the fuck up. I'm sorry. Kai, back the fuck up from Inya. What did I watch? Oh, I started taxi.

I watched taxi. That was cool. But y'all, or taxi driver. What did I watch? Oh, I started taxi. I watched taxi. That was cool. But y'all are taxi driver. What's that one? With the guy crashing out over some coach. What is that? What is it? What is it?

Taxi driver? I don't know. It's a boy movie. It could be a lot of movie. Oh, taxi driver is a boy movie. Yeah. I just saw that for the first time. Y'all are too much.

Like boys are too much. It did take me two days to finish. Obviously it was gorgeous, but like one thing about me is I don't give a fuck about A Man's Crash Out. Like A Man's Crash Out is just so less inspiring to me, but it was such a good movie and also De Niro and the blonde girl,

the one he was crashing out over, girl I would crash out too. Like I guess I would crash out too, so I can't even really hold him. So that was a good movie. I saw another boy movie. Oh, I started The Master. I feel like that's a boy movie.

I couldn't finish it. It's good though, that's a good boy movie. Really? I got like an hour and 30 in, but I was really sleepy because I think I watched a movie before that. I watched something before that and then I watched that.

I was just like on a, oh, I literally think I watched Wicked. And then I was that I was just like on oh, I literally think I watched wicked And then I was like time to put myself to sleep So I put the master on but I have to finish it. I've gotten a really bad habit of Starting movies and not finish them which was a bad habit I got into as a teenager and I'm back to that like I have watched I have Rika That is the one movie I will literally never finish and I know it's amazing But that movie puts me to sleep like it's a narcotic.

It is literally like it gives me fucking narcolepsy. It gives me necrophiliac. Like, it's so crazy. Like I just start fucking dead people and munching. You know, what's fucked up is the other night I slept in Drew's bed and he heard my knees cracking while we were going to bed. And he like literally shut up from his sleep and he was like, was that your knee? And I said yes. And it's made me self-conscious about how loud my like knees crack. My knees crack crazy. I've never heard that before or since. So

that was just, that was a rare moment. Every night I like, I like do this or I like clench here and then my knees crack a bunch and it feels so good But I know that's bad, right? Mmm. I think popping joints is okay Fuck I really wish like but there's different types of cracks like in my knee I have scar tissue from my knee surgery and that is not good I think I have like a bruise put a permanently bruised meniscus, but swear I know what that is Well, I guess I'll miss you guys. Yeah, we'll miss you.

I actually will because I, I like talking. You know, I love our little band here. But I need to take a break from talking so my talking can get better. I love, like, the, I've been seeing a bunch of TikToks recently of people being like,

bro, I feel like I'm in the room with them. And like, I'll be like laughing and then I'll like, in my head, like, wanna chime in and they can't chime in because it's like they're on the other side of the screen. They chime in record yourself recording it and then have a conversation with us and upload that shit to TikTok. No, someone legitimately should do that and start an account like those one boys that do the talking talk to a they should do that with emergency intercom. But it's like, adding in. Yeah yeah adding into the conversation and then playing if you that's a million dollar idea whoever's out there thank you guys so much for watching we will see you soon and I hope you're here when I get back and if

you're not honestly I understand but you're a bitch for moving on because literally you couldn't just wait for me you couldn't wait you couldn't just wait while I go around and I do whatever I want and I don't talk to you for three Weeks god, you're a bitch. Oh No, but seriously, please be here when I come back and nothing is gonna change by the way Like we're not like building a oh, yeah Yeah, like we're really it's like it's purely for us. It's for our mental. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Thanks for watching!