Emergency Intercom - goodbye...

Episode Date: March 24, 2023

enya thinks tsa is not real and theyre evil, drew has a new political theory about twilight and things get a little... serious...  Go to Zocdoc.com/INTERCOM and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today. Many are available within 24 hours. Follow Enya on Insta: @EnyaUmanzor Follow Drew on Insta: @DrewPhillips09 To listen to the podcast on YouTube: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercomPodYT Don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercom If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercom Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Wow, that was a really, really shocking and disturbing way to start this episode of emergency intercom literally all i can think about is all the people who start episodes with their parents and they're like okay they're like in the car or with their therapists we need more people watching the podcast did we talk about that on the patreon episode where did we talk about that yeah y'all are weird for that i don't but i guess i never got into a conversation where i was showing my therapist what i watched that's weird i'm sorry i'm sorry you're not weird but like i i just can't imagine i say that as if i haven't had to like email my therapist a very long letter i received from people and that i was sending back and we had to use a secret like email like she didn't want me

to send it through any of my emails because it was like super personal it was a super personal letter and she was like we can't send it through it it was not even that it was not that it was embarrassing as fuck never never that deep never that deep it's like i'm gonna go through your email like i've gone through your email and like texts and shit like a bunch just like because i'm like trying to see what you're saying about me but like i like like i would do that you've gone through my stuff yeah like even reading your like journals and diaries and shit whoa that is a complete invasion of privacy you don't do that no it's because that's like how i get to know you and how i wanted to tell you things i would tell you i write really like i i know i know you write really evil shit in there and that's how i know that's how i know

how to manipulate you oh you are you have gotten really good at it did you just recently start that's why we're such good friends oh okay no i mean like i guess i wouldn't trade that for our friendship so i'll take it exactly i um was talking to orion the other day just like talking about like past journal entries and how like in the moment when i'm like writing in my journal or writing in my notes app like something super emotional and like really like just like cathartic and letting it all out like i'll read it back like even eight hours later, granted, I'm in the most suicidal moment of my life. Anytime I journal, I'm fighting off the demons, which are praying for my downfall constantly.

These bitches are praying for my downfall. That's the craziest thing. They want me to fail. Yeah, I have been noticing that. Yeah, they want me to fail really bad. But I was just saying how after eight hours even, I go back and read it. And it's the most appalling, embarrassing, like shitty writing ever.

And I literally think I'm like slaying down. Like I think I'm eating fucking boots. You were literally giving like I'm writing the next A24 monologue. No, literally. They're going to find this journal. I was going to say that. They're going to find this journal. I was going to say that. They're going to find this shit and adapt it. I need to be back in a position in my life where I'm getting the A24 monologue in my text. I need that. I need that back.

Maybe I don't, but I think I do. But yeah, I haven't read any of my journals. But even when I see the writing I've publicly shared, I'm like, oh my God, girl. Get a fucking grip. But I still do it. I still write down. I'm like oh my god girl like get a fucking grip but i still do it i still like write down i'm like damn nobody knows my brain my brain is so good i like really love the way you see the world thank you like i love the way your brain works the world through negative 175 exactly exactly you're so blurred blur um well

what should we do should we get into the serious shit let's save let's save that because we're on a good roll let's save the seriousness for later um i'm gonna insert a photo of the man's bare feet next to me on the fucking flight for once i went out of my way i've been like out of la for a long time i got the option to upgrade it was actually the best deal ever because i thought i was i was like i'm gonna even change it to tomorrow and then they asked to triple the rate get the fuck off of me i was like you are finding that way too funny you fucking ew i hit your foot so hard it didn't hurt but was it it genuinely didn't hurt like i swear but was it like wet no it was just like the weirdest feeling ever like i like because usually with your socks on it's like warm is it wet is my foot wet

was it moist i just i just knew that was gonna um but i finally was like you know what i'm gonna treat myself like i haven't been feeling my best i'm gonna take this fucking upgrade bitch tell me why the man next to me had his bare fucking feet out i didn't even show you i'm gonna show you them i accidentally deleted it because i was making an uh can i go through your recently deleted oh my god that's literally what they did to me in paris and it made me actually want to fucking stab. Wait, who? Remember at TSA?

I don't think I said it on the podcast. Oh, oh, oh. I was, I didn't, I always forget that you can't film TSA. Which is bullshit. And yeah, cause I'm like, also like, and I don't film people's faces. Like I film like the tables and stuff because it looks cool. It's so weird. Like seeing all my stuff through an x-ray.

Like that's what I want a picture of i don't want video or picture of your fucking ugly stinky ass because you've literally been standing in the room with everybody's bare feet for three hours and you actually smell like mildew soup so fuck you it's not about you i want pictures and videos of the gear and the x-rays because it's so weird to me and it's also fake but that's a different story but we were i was at fucking leaving france and they always go through my shit so for my vlog wait i need a john mayer documentary on tsa like you know filming with john mayer no what does that mean yeah the documentarian on the scaffolding sometimes it feels like your brain like shuffles through words and just says that like scaffolding guy what in new york i don't know what oh documentary john wilson no i know documentary now john o'bair i literally knew that um that was literally a joke um but i just wanted to film them going through my bag because like their hands again i don't film

strangers but i wanted i got like a video of my bag laid out and i didn't think anything of it it's like 6 a.m and i'm super tired i slept for like two hours whatever the woman hadn't spoken to me like the only interaction was too stunned to speak. But the only thing she had said to me was she like in broken English was obviously we had a language barrier. She was like, oh, is this a candle like in my bag? And I was like, yeah, it is whatever. And she's like, OK. And very kind.

Very nice. I did that. And then like I'm waiting for them to put it back. And she just looks at me he goes give me your phone and to which i said the fuck like i literally yelled that back because she she first of all she switched on me so fucking fast she was so nice and like a girl around my age so i was like oh this is like whatever i i enjoy when i'm interacting with people who live uh not psychological warfare lives like we do i'm like this is awesome like we're the same age like i like interacting with

people my age out in public exactly until they get fucking slick with me because i'm like bitch now we're on the same playing grounds and i will jump over this x-ray machine and beat the fuck out of you because why are you yelling at me so she like she screamed at me which was also humiliating because i'm like standing there she goes give me your phone because and i was just stunned so i just go the fuck and i just look at her and i'm like no and i walk down to go get my shit i'm like this and you literally got tackled in tsa she's gonna ignore that fact she got tackled to the ground with her pants around her ankles over grab my bag sumo slammed it onto my head i hit the floor and if you know anything about

hitting your head on the floor you get a concussion yes if you know anything about if you know that um but she like yelled at me and then her other friend came over and they started laughing and talking together and then he looks at me and is like give me the phone and they're yelling at me so i'm like oh they love the power do they love it and i'm like bitch i will break your plastic badge with my fucking teeth like shut the fuck up i will literally eat it um and then i'm just like what and i already knew then it clicked in my head i was like oh i'm not allowed to film them i always forget so i delete it and i they're like go to photos and i'm like i just show them my my photo roll they grab my phone out of my hand which immediately pisses me off because i'm like that is my iphone 14 pro max not an android do not touch my phone so he grabs my phone and without

asking me starts going through it and i'm like what the fuck is happening in any other case scenario if there wasn't a language barrier and it was a 5 a.m i actually would have freaked the fuck out and become like the worst person in the airport and caused a scene and been like because why are you touching my iphone i know legally you cannot touch my fucking iphone that's one thing about that's one thing about this great country is you cannot touch my iphone yeah not in america but i wasn't in our country our great country but um yeah basically he like then goes to recently deleted and goes like this to show my face and bitch what are you going through my text like what the fuck is happening why do you need my face code i'm like oh he's going through my recently deleted so i snatch my phone go and

delete it and don't give my phone back and i'm like it's gone and then they just laugh at me because they think it's so funny and then i became the worst person in the world because um i was so fucking mad so i started slamming everything in that back and i did break orion's like candle topper by doing that because i was slamming my candle topper that i got for my candle exploded it's so it is so fragile um but yeah i became the worst person ever and like all the bags were piling up but like they had gone through all my and tore it up to find one girl that would never happen to me i wouldn't let that happen it would never happen to me in the first clip first place because this face card never declined so like they they would literally never attempt it with me just because i look yeah yeah yeah you look so fucking good they're like fuck face cards in debt

insufficient um but yeah i don't know what oh hey your wake up slow oh that's me that's you i was like wow you use that me my 12 20 alarm um i don't know why i said that oh yeah um that was just somebody being really fucking rude to me at tsa and i got stopped again yesterday i think that candle was just getting me stopped and i think it was the mic i had the mic in my bag so i think it's the mic and the candle but they never touch the mic they go to the candle and they're like what is this i'm like bitch it's a fucking candle smell it smell it what was the other thing you started that story oh because the man with his feet out yeah yeah i don't know how we got there oh but then i did get stopped

again before i got on the plane and they went through my shit again and they were being so fucking they did that on purpose he was like are you not happy to be here and i'm like bitch am i not happy to be at the tsa before my fucking boarding when i'm about to get on a 12 hour economy flight no no i am not happy they were but i didn't say all that i just looked at him and i was like they did that because you were slamming your shit around they got their i had um a orange sticker on my thing from the moment she got my pass when i first entered the airport and i didn't know what that was and it was like get to uh gate an hour before uh boarding and i was like what like i was like bitch i know i know

how planes work like um but it was literally they looked at it and they were like oh this sticker means you were chosen and i was like oh i chose it for what and they're like to be harassed again to get germs all over your shit to have to stand barefoot at the dirtiest place in the world stop that fucking scared the fuck out of me what's up spotify? This is Javi. I remember this one time we were on tour. We didn't have any guitar picks, and we didn't have time to go to the store, so we placed an order on Prime, and it got there the next day, ready for the show.

Whatever you're into, it's on Prime. You need to stop with that shit. I don't play with that shit. What is wrong with you? Stop! It's so loud! Where did you get that, bitch? All I can think about is, like, me when y'all try to chase me with that double A battery chaser from Shein and it's just the guy shaking and taking the first run.

Yeah, literally. Me pepper spraying you pepper spraying you where is that from pepper um i got it from uh this like flea market in downtown um but i went with this perfect segue um i went to this flea market to get a bunch of like burning oils because you can buy a bunch of them for really cheap and they have like dupes of like le labo and like all this shit and i was like yeah i'm gonna go get that because i want to put like sontal 34 on these dryer balls that we got because if you put the oil on there the perfume oil it's like a lint roller or a lint sheet or a dryer sheet and it like infects the clothes with that smell but i was like here i go buying sauntal 34 for 500 to spray it on there like i'm not doing that so i'm

gonna buy the literally burn it away exactly so i went and bought all that shit it was nice i used it it works my bed smell like sauntal now it was genius dare i say and you should do it too didn't make it up but no no i made up the songs all 34 of it oh yeah um but i was laying in bed after i um had just put my laundry in the dryer and me and azul were like chilling hard and i think the worst 10 minutes of my life occurred like genuinely the worst 10 minutes of my life occurred so So many traumatic events back to back to back to back. So I hear like a sound on my carpet and I just got new carpets in my room. They're really cute and kind of like charisma, uniqueness,

nerve and talent, like they give whatever. Azul loves playing on them. And he was like running around and like eating the corners of my carpet and like when azul eats the corners of carpets they curl up or curl over and there's like she likes to pull them yeah exactly so there's like nothing you can do about it once it's done like it's done like it's curled like that forever you can't it's one of them curled yeah two two corners are curled um on the the one you walk into the room and so i was like god damn

it and he had like ripped one of them to shreds on the edge the next three months tripping into i know literally and so i was pissed about that so what does that mean me when you're gonna mean you're gonna chip in your room um but i like am like fed up so i chase azul out of my room i'm like get shoot get out you're not playing in here anymore you're in time out go to your room like I'm done like I'm not dealing with this and so I get up and I'm walking to the kitchen to get some shit and I heard some shit going on the hallway and I was like what the fuck is that I walk out and I see a massive pile of cat vomit like I've never seen this much cat vomit in my entire life.

I was going to take a picture to show you guys, but I was like, yeah, here I go posting cat vomit in the podcast. Like that's too far. So I see it. And this is like seconds after Azul destroyed my carpets. So I see it and I'm like, I'm not fucking dealing with this shit. Like I'm literally not. I was going to the bathroom to have like an existential meltdown

because it's my safe space. i love going in there and like freaking out and pondering i literally ponder and come up with theories in the bathroom like where do i take these theories like for real girl you flush them down the toilet before you leave um so i love that as you were delivering that you realized it sucked no i i like i wanted to say something good but i was like there's nothing good to say and i knew that was yeah um so i am sitting in there i have my meltdown and i'm like i'm gonna deal with this vomit afterwards does my breast stink or some shit no i was smelling this jacket because i was i can't remember the last time i washed it but i know i washed it because the sleeves are small. Oh, shit. But I step out of the bathroom and I completely forget the vomit's there.

And I kick. There was a mound of it and I kick it across the hall. It splatters on the wall. Then there's like a giant puddle that was leaking away and I slip in it. So I hit it with both of my fucking socked feet, which like, thank God I had socks on. But literally nightmare and then seconds after that happened the dryer i had just bought these new vials of really nice perfume oil and the dryer threw one of them off and it exploded everywhere and like just was glass everywhere like

fucking oil everywhere it was so bad and then i took my socks off went to my bedroom and pouted for another like five minutes and came out there and cleaned up the oil and the cat vomit at the same time and i was like that happens do you think like i'm literally gonna leave that for i need to clean when she gets i i did think about it but i was like yeah here i go leaving this giant mound of vomit for four days in the middle of the hallway and like i'm also like i'm taking care of him right now so like it's like kind of my job um but yeah it was fucking terrible the worst vibe in the world upsetting um couldn't believe that was going on but yeah i fucking slipped in vomit well to make you feel better here's the picture of the man's feet. I want to smell those.

Is that weird? They smell really bad. Did they actually smell? They smell. That is fucking terrifying. And he was old. And he had four drinks. How old was he?

Maybe like 60. Those are like decent feet for a 60-year-old man. No. They look like plump. He wasn't like my dad. That toenail is crazy. I know. He wasn't like a working class he wasn't like he wasn't like my toenail is crazy i know he wasn't like a working class person like he's not like someone like my dad who's like outside like working on his feet so why do they look like that maybe that is what happens when you sit too he

might have loki have diabetes because those are like swollen feet they are yeah those are swollen diabetes i'm sorry but they stunk and he and you know what's worse is he wasn't wearing shoes without socks he was wearing shoes with socks because when we were landing he was putting his socks back on also the woman next to me was rude she asked for ice cream and espresso with her ice cream which i did copy because like an avocado on the plane sounds fucking lit even though they put apple sauce like an apple cream all over and it tasted sour as fuck but that's a different story but i think i had the same thing um she was like no i didn't didn't have her tray down and he was like can you put it down so i could like put these things down and she was like can i not just put it here in the middle

thing and he was like yeah okay and then she like wasn't helping put everything down i had to put everything down you have operations operations yeah yeah like hella operations do you think do you mean op yeah like you got ops like hella operations no that's not what that like like so many feds a bit i'm literally federal as fuck like i'm a fed i will tell on you i don't give a fuck my car because that's the car in new york that's the new nypd car and i was watching a bunch of like you're literally getting into that car i was like oh my god that's how we look getting into that car um they were nerds and it was really embarrassing but well we don't have to do that anymore yeah oh because drew has a car i got a car people which is fucking insane i was thinking about

the other day i was like whoa drew can like go somewhere which granted i don't think you will i forgot i had a car for two days the two days after i drove it around all day i completely forgot i got it and i stayed inside for two and a half days and then the only reason i left was to get azul food and litter yesterday thank you yeah i'm not paying you back for that shit bro it was honestly not as expensive as i thought i got a big ass box of litter because they didn't have the normal one you normally get they just had 29 pound fucking bag boxes of a litter it was like crazy and it actually like hurt my finger like scraped your fingers carrying it?

Yeah. No, like pinched like underneath like the nerves and shit. It was crazy. But yeah. And then I, what else did I do? Oh, I got a car freshener from Diptyque. Yeah. You're literally so bored.

Yeah. And it's so powerful. You can smell it when you walk up to my car outside. Actually, I am jealous of that. Well, I just don't like my car. But that car is now for my parents because i'm a good kid guys good for you good kid i'm gonna give my kids a car because their cars literally don't work my parents have never had a car that works like i feel like that is true like every time ever every year i've met you it's always been a car problem for them yeah like my parents just like we could never afford a car a new car so every car they've ever gotten it's

like shit i was on my way to work and two minutes away from if i had a dollar for every time my parents said dude y'all are so broke you you've oh my god what the fuck like why don't they fucking work like literally people should work for their things that's what i would that i mean that's what they try to do but then the car breaks down on the way there i was saying if i had a dollar for every time they've been like you'll never believe this i'm on my way to work i don't even get on the highway and it's done the car's off they have i'm not kidding you i think i've heard that at least 30 times in my lifetime. Oh, my God. So you have $30.

It's always the same tone. Yeah. So I could pay for insurance on a 1962 Honda. I was going to say you could also buy a steak quesadilla and a veggie burrito bowl from and a large Coca-Cola from Chipotle chipotle it's only 26 bucks is that damn that's all you had all that i didn't eat i got one to eat and then one to eat later you are a nasty vile woman oh i am scared of uh microwaves and i'm so glad we don't have one because i was heating up my milk in somebody's microwave and i was like

why can that do that in 10 seconds it makes no sense it's evil it's literally radiation we have radiation in our house just like obliterating our food like it's not chill and normal like i'm so anti-microwave what are you doing me when i'm superman my chest just hurts really bad and literally me when i'm superman supreme man supreme man yes i have yes you're oh my god bro like where did you get those did you buy those yeah i bought them at dover um why does it sound like i'm crying um i bought them at dover because you're so happy you're full of joy was a gift from my friend julian and you know i said early on the podcast i was like i'm just gonna buy a

fake one like i'm literally like you can screen print this shit at home like i'm gonna buy a fake one but this one's actually real so don't i think it's fake like why do I feel like it's fake? And the jacket's probably fake, too. It's from my panda buy haul. My five kilogram panda buy haul. What? Is kilograms a lot? Is five kilograms a lot? I have no idea. It's insane how I don't know the imperial system at all.

Neither do I. Wait, are we the imperial system? I think we're imperial. But I don't know the difference. I gotta look this up. Well, I just recently found out that there's british people who are latin there's british people who could speak spanish so they speak like oh british people are literally nasty as fuck um but they just sound they sound normal i'm joking i'm joking and then they sound the

way they do when they speak english so they why can't i think of anything to say british or the telly oh i do it you sound like a victorian person who just like got transported back oh i microwave or is a problem with this oh it's a president's front yeah yeah you eat the words when you do it yeah i like scrunch my face oh also we are so obsessed with like victorian edwardian era like like colon like edward colon era like so i like yeah um but i know they stunk like they had plumbing but it was like the plumbing that was really really poorly done so you know they smelled like shit and they wore hella layers so you know that era smelled so nasty as fuck sorry to completely 360 the conversation i just wanted to say i know

they stunk i just came to like a really crazy realization okay you know how there's like edward girls and then there's what's the other one jacob jacob edward and jacob and it was like edward is like this emo like vampire and then jacob is like this masculine like strong normal normal person okay uh so edward if you were an edward girly you're more likely to be liberal like you're a liberal person abnormal and liberal as am i and if you were a jacob girly you're a republican because it's like the norm like middle of America like corn fed like big man

yeah I guess I don't know anybody but I was I'm gonna be honest I was like into Jacob more than Edward when I was growing up but I guess that would yeah that does reflect it does track I hate that that's the reaction you had for that thought.

You literally acted like you just thought of something that nobody. No one has ever thought about that. I haven't heard that theory. But you said it like it was the most insane thought ever in terms of like intellectual. Prove me wrong. I can't. Prove me wrong. I guess I could, but i would have to do

like a charting of like who liked who but i guess i don't see like in the comments of jacob so there's a lot to be said there a lot to be said oh my god new lana album coming i'm coming i'm coming i'm coming all over him um but that was also i beat that i decided why did i say that what was the joke of like the call of duty yeah like he's coming he's coming on my back he's coming all over us um well i decided men are not allowed to be on swing sets anymore you have no business moving your legs like that that's true like like big grown-ass man getting on and like who did you see on his thing i saw a tiktok of somebody like on of like a i don't actually remember i just saw a swing set and then it was like it was supposed to be sweet it was like a

dad and his daughter i was like get him off of that that is very thin get him off of there like why are you on there you need to get down it just like, why are you using your feet to like throw yourself around in a playful, joyful manner? Like, you build the swing set. We get on. That's the way it works. Literally, like, I just realized how... Is it recording still? I'm just making sure um i just realized how like insane our like topics are in like in

our episodes like if you think about it like we go from talking about tsa to men not being allowed to swing on like and it's like one stream of consciousness and don't get me wrong i fucking love it and i would never change it but like and that's like the thing but it really is like a feat that like is it makes no sense but if you think about it it does make sense because why is tsa so nasty disgusting and miserable because it's a bunch of predominantly men running around thinking they have power and why are men on swing sets so disgusting because you're a nasty man and why are men on swing sets so disgusting? Because you're a nasty man and why are you enjoying yourself and throwing yourself around? You're disgusting and annoying.

Why are you just flailing around? Which should, like, actually, the two, like, don't intersect because if there's a commentary on masculinity, me commentating on the lack of masculinity, like, it should, like, that's just me. She's different. I'm different.

Like, I draw my lines in the sand where I want. We should ban masculinity. Oh, my God. Yeah. How would you ban that, though? I don't know. Don't fucking ask me. I just proposed the idea.

Literally, not my job. We are literally living in satanic panic 2.0 do you know satanic panic do you know what that is that's fucking late i need that on a shirt yeah that's like 1980s that's like a ted bundy like friday or that one guy from stranger things is it ted money okay no don't do that ew you know that one i know the clip eddie i think is his name eddie burbank is that his name eddie bareback whoa what did i say i literally love eddie bareback's youtube videos so much wait who's eddie is eddie burbank a person yeah he's a youtuber oh so that last name is a real last name yeah but that's not literally a city like like his videos are fucking fire my name is and yet north miami my name is in

yeah i'm from north miami yeah okay what the fuck was it oh satanic oh so the original satanic panic was like 1980s early 1990s and it was literally just a bunch of people terrified that like satanism was taking over and it was just a big conspiracy that like every visual like it was all from like music and movies and all that shit and people were just like scared of like satanism like and how everyone is selling their soul and shit literally look at like all of the conversations happening right now and it's all like illuminati and like why is little yachty dancing in front of a demon on stage or like why is playboy cardi acting like a demon and acting like that like they sold their souls satanic panic 2.0 early 2020s boom mic drop don't have anything else to add to that um oh my god i literally just itched my head

and like fucking flicks fell out it was like nasty your skin is crumbling i know we need to get shirts that say satanic panic though like there has to be those shirts because manic panic hair dye we should dye our hair with manic panic at the disco yeah satanic panic at manic at the disco that's my band i see you i see you but yeah and then what else was i going to say i was gonna yeah i guess also i think that makes a lot of sense that that why that's a conversation too is because of like catholicism becoming such a big um pinpoint for fashion and aesthetic which i hate saying that. And I saw something yesterday. It was actually the worst TikTok I've ever seen.

But that's a different story. But somebody said Catholicism era or like Catholic. No, Catholic core. Bitch, I'm taking that word away. No more core. No more core. No more core.

What you need to do is open that book and get to the core of it so you can expand your mind. What you need to do is get to the core of your mental issues yeah we need to get to the core what the fuck's wrong with you well unless it's truth core truth core hope core actually hope hope course yeah i love that but truth core is probably cool yeah truth course can y'all make a truth core edit someone yeah i know someone's out there that can do it. But all the comments were like, Catholicism is not some fucking aesthetic. This is a religion. And I was like, oh, wow.

I didn't realize that there was people who actually like are hardcore behind Catholicism, which like obviously I know that because my family. Catholic roots. Not my immediate family though but um obviously there's still people who follow catholicism religiously uh but i didn't realize that there would ever be an overlap of people being upset at like the popularity of like using crosses and like super religious pieces in jewelry and on clothing and all these things so then that would make sense that like that mix with people going super like off the written path of visuals again

those two intertwining would start oh my god rock nation no illuminati illuminati see the thing the thing is, I could sit here and say that I'm in the Illuminati and no one would believe it. And then in two years, someone would clip it and be like, it's been right in front of our faces the whole time. Well, that would mean you would have to like own a jet in two years. So maybe like in five years. Yeah. We'll give five years. But I don't know if in five years you'll have a jet in two years so maybe like in five years yeah we'll give five years but i don't know if in five years you'll have a jet so well i am in the illuminati um i wish oh my god like literally i wish my life would be so much easier it would be so lit right well i'm just like thinking about

it like what it would mean to be in the illuminati i just don't know that it would mean much well infinite chrome hearts you can get a bunch of chrome hearts you know what chrome hearts is the modern day supreme dare i say dare i say but it's been i think it's been around longer than yeah it's been it's been here for ages but yeah the popularity where it falls, it falls in the same circle as the people who really- It's having its peak right now. Peak. I'm peaking right now. Oh my God.

What the hell? Oh my God. No way. You're laying in that bed. You're laying in a bed that 10 men have laid in in the past year i bet you feel real good about yourself oh my god i love that is it poetic to you yeah it actually is yeah but like the connotation and context behind it is really dark but like if you just said that to me like without all the evil shit behind it

it'd be really deep and beautiful that'd be deep and it's all her facial movements and at that really i know she's really good with her facial movements i've never seen anybody scrunch their eyebrows as deeply as she can like she literally has eight million tiny muscles here that she has full control of. Well, we missed a vital sign. We always talk about how society has gone too far. Things have gotten excessive and crazy. But you know what the first signs of that were? And we all just like glazed over it. Sugar Factory.

That was the first signs of capitalism going too far. I've never been. Gluttony. Me either. We actually have to go. We should go this weekend. I'm down to literally go tonight.

Are they still open? Or we should go before SZA. Oh, but Jester's art show is right before, I realize. So we do have to do that. We have to cruise. But we should fully go. Is there a sugar factory?

But Sugar Factory Las Vegas, if there's a... Oh, no, it's called It Sugar. That's, no, It Sugar is the candy store. There's no sugar factories? Oh, wait, wait, wait. There's gotta be one here. No, they all permanently closed makes a lot of sense okay oh my god wait is sugar factory out of business

i think sugar factory is like fully closed unless we go to las vegas someone order a 24 karat burger on there from there no it's in las vegas there's still a sugar factory in las vegas so i guess we have to go to vegas road trip um but that is when things were going too far the moment we stepped into the realm that waiters are doing performance art for us with the fucking like 50 dessert that's when it goes too far i was at a restaurant and the dessert was like 24 which is still way too much for what it was it's so expensive it was like an expensive restaurant and the dessert was like $24, which is still way too much for what it was. It's so expensive. It was like an expensive restaurant. And the man very slowly, and it was like way too theatrical. And I was like, what the fuck is happening?

Like drizzling chocolate all over the thing. And it felt almost sexual. I was like, you need to back up. Get the fuck, like your groin is close. He's jizzing all over your food. That's what I felt like. Theoretically with the chocolate sauce but no he was actually very cool and like i didn't feel that crazy about it but i was over analyzing

i was like what does this mean like why like i could have done that and i would have enjoyed drizzling my own chocolate on my thing but like he was like you ready and we were like yeah and then he did it for us and was really slow and he was like but then he left it behind so i was like so we could have done it, but whatever. Sugar factory. That was the moment that we went too far. It was too much. It was just so, like, why? Also, I'd be-

Gluttony. I think it's just, it's like fun. I don't know. Yeah, because what's, but what, like, what about it is fun? Getting pink burgers. Pink burger. Pink burger. Pretty patties. Wait. Bitch, I what's, but what, like, what about it is fun? Getting pink burgers. Pink burger. Pink burger. Pretty patties.

Wait. Bitch, I would fuck up a pretty patty. I wish, like, we understood the size of it. Because in my head, the Sugar Factory cups are fucking humongous. They're like this big. Yeah, they're, like, humongous. But are they really that big? Like, nobody needs to be eating this.

Yeah, I was going to say, like, I think Las Vegas is literally a dangerous place oh that looks so fucking delicious i hate that you think that looks no the that oh this this looks fucking disgusting drew that looks yummersville is fucked oh something's wrong with you but yeah we need to go but this was the moment that we went too far it's literally called goblet bar the goblet what's that one dude um with the slit in his eyebrow that people say i kind of look like sometimes drake no oh yeah i do look like drake see i didn't even have to say that she said at that time yeah see i would fuck that up in a dangerous way um But no, no, no. Like John Mayer-esque.

He's a singer-songwriter. He writes the songs of the summer. Can I watch this? Jack Antonoff? No, no, no, no. He is for the girls. He writes the songs of the summer. Grubbies. I want my grubbies.

Charlie Puth? See? The song of the summer um grubbies i want my grubbies charlie booth see the song of the summer bitch i he is he is the personification of that joke like wait why did i just write the song no like that motherfucker like ate a little bit when he said grubbies i will say because it's in my vocabulary now no no he says no he says grubbies he said grubbies i will say because it's in my vocabulary now no no he says no he says grubbies he says grubbies i thought he said something else like hung no he said hung he fucking said hungies oh my god i'm literally so fucking no no hungies is in our vocabulary though he did give that to us i'm hungies as fuck and i'm looking for some grubbies do you think he's ever heard somebody he was like fucking on fart and been like do you know f no f no you were flat that babe you were flat that time we gotta the queef we gotta pump it up

well i'd just be queefing after sex especially after missionary something's like wrong with you um but yeah right right but yeah john mayer vibes oh i'm like dizzy john mayer why the fuck is that in my head i don't think i've ever heard a john mayer song in my goddamn life i don't think i give a single flying fuck about john mayer i've seen him in real life and literally if you had a spike if you had me connected to see like a lie detector test to see if like anything in my like rhythmic whatever the fuck is happening in my body changed literally nothing happened i don't know if i could even recognize him i'm just just, but I'm bad with like celebrity and musicians. Yeah, I'm almost too good at it. But I'm just, I'm really good at faces.

And like if I've met you or seen your face before, I will always like remember you when I see you again. But I'm really bad with the names to the face. Like sometimes we'll see someone and I'm like, that's from fucking, from the, yeah. Survivor. Survivor. Well. Jeff... Yeah. Survivor. Survivor. Well...

Jeff Probst from Survivor. Who's that? He's lit. He's lit. I still haven't watched a season of Survivor. Once you watch one, you'll watch 30. It's impossible not to just watch one season of Survivor. But like...

I don't know how I'm going to find this. Actually, I think i shouldn't be saying that because i think he's like got in trouble for something or no i think the show did oh he's a producer he's like the host oh yeah i guess let's see if he's gotten in trouble no he's fine or maybe it was a show. Or maybe that was Bachelor. I don't know. You're thinking of The Bachelor. The Bachelor host was like replaced and fired.

But I don't remember why. That's what it was. Because I don't watch that. We have to catch up on Milf Manor. Milf Manor. Oh, my God. I have been watching so many shows. It's crazy.

But yes, we need to watch Drag Race all the way through. Because it's about to be the finale and we're going to get spoiled. Oh, yeah yes we need to watch drag race all the way through because it's about to be the finale and we're gonna get spoiled oh yeah we have to watch it um what do we have like five episodes to watch i think like four maybe no probably five or six even um but which and this is like a decent season like it's the best it's so easy to binge because we binged like four episodes in one night. We were like, damn, is that really it? But I literally watched both seasons of Ted Lasso in one day, like literally in one night, like two seasons worth. And then I watched both seasons of Fleabag the very next day. So I watched four seasons of a or of two different shows

in two days that's insane and then i watched fleabag is so fucking good i think i also think i binged fleabag in like two days i like watched the first episode like when you first started watching it and i was like i don't know if i if i fully would like this i only watched like seven or eight minutes of it and then i watched it again i started in the bath and i was like i don't know if i if i fully would like this i only watched like seven or eight minutes of it and then i watched it again i started in the bath and i was like oh wow this is genuinely a masterpiece it is easily one of the best shows ever i love good female driven and written shows or movies where it's actually a real fucking woman and it's not some fucking like written by a man i'm crazy but i'm fun but i'm deep but i'm silly yeah but yeah that uh fleabag is like genuinely a masterpiece like i'm so sad there's only two seasons i know but it's one of

those though ted lasso is really good i need to watch that but i also need to finish severance like i we literally only watched one episode and i really liked it actually. I need to watch that, but I also need to finish Severance. Like, we literally only watched one episode, and I really liked it, but then I refused to pay for Apple TV, but now I have Apple TV. I have Apple TV, too. I have Apple TV because Timothy was in that commercial. I was like, dude, like, when we saw him, I was like, it was literally so good it made us get Apple TV. Yeah, Timothy's Apple TV commercials, I was like, damn, like, I miss being his friend.

Like, I miss seeing him as much as we used to, but that's normal within friendships to, like like super like intense times of maybe being close and then both parties get caught up in work and life changes and you just keep it pushing but you'll always have the memories we have with timothy yeah but like it just ended on such a horrible note like yeah but i mean with me personally no but yeah i can see why from your end it's like hard to imagine being friends with yeah you just i shouldn't even tell that no i don't think you should because i'm still friends with him don't like draw some weird like line in the sand also like i think he pulled the knife on me but i think that's a simple apology like fix like he like he

was a bit drunk and like no he tried to kill me well you did say some like evil things to him you said some really like bicycle seat face like that's a funny joke that everyone that's like literally if you heard something a bunch of times when like people say that like that's no if you hear something all the time it like becomes hurtful and then to hear from your friends like he was vulnerable with you when he told you that that hurt his feeling he whatever whatever yeah i'm just saying i'm just saying it was fucking weird something that needs to be from your friends, like he was vulnerable with you when he told you that that hurt his feelings. He, whatever, whatever. Yeah. I'm just saying, I'm just saying it was fucking weird.

I don't think it's something that needs to be discussed here. He just came at me with a fucking knife. I don't think it's that big of an issue. Like me, me and Tim Tam get along hella good. That's my nickname for him by the way, Tim Tam. He wouldn't let me call him anything other than Timotei. I don't think he ever wanted to be my friend.

I don't think he can be friends with other men. Like, I think he can only be friends with women. And it's like this weird, like, almost maybe misogynistic. Or no, misandrous. Oh, yeah. He is misandrous, but that makes him a slay in my books. And if he's not down for other men, like for me, that is amazing. Well, Timotei, Timmy T.

Tim Tam. Tim Tam. Timmy Tam, Tam, Tam, Timmy Tam, Tam. This is over. But, all right, let's get on to the serious and real. The reality, the reality of the realness. Should we do media first or just this and then media? Let's do the media first.

Okay. So Ted Lasso, Fleabag, watch Fleabag over Ted Lasso. But like Ted Lasso, the character that Jason Sudeikis plays is literally just so wholesome and lovable. And like, it's such a different like take on that like idea of a show and I think that's why I love it so much is because it's like different like you normally see someone who's like an anti-hero in that situation but he's

like a hero hero which is really just cute and fun um and then fleabag like and you just said it's just like it's such a like it's so such a believable story yeah believable story like it's new jaw-dropping moments like you'll laugh the hardest you've ever laughed at a show i haven't laughed out loud at a show like that i don't think ever in my life you'll cry like you've never cried i saw yeah dude and i had oh my god there were moments so brutal where i almost wish you didn't watch it so i could re-watch it again with someone there were moments where i felt the same anxiety that i felt in climax like that edge of the seat like the moment when the big reveal happens and she's running through like the cages oh and there was a moment with her makeup like running halfway down her face like and she's running through like the cages yeah oh and there was a moment with her makeup like

running halfway down her face like and she's walking also her care dude her haircut like the way they style her like everything is just there's so much attention to detail that show is fucking perfect i wouldn't change it so bad i i liked that show so much i started it sitting up at my imac and i binged the whole thing sitting in a hard ass chair just staring at my computer because I like couldn't believe it. So watching on a TV might be nice. Well, I'm still watching The Sopranos. I'm going to start Succession tonight, I think. But the new season literally comes out when I think this episode is out.

So I'm just like to. Or it comes out the 26th so yeah it like by the time this comes out it comes out on saturday so i'm just like oh my god i won't be able to catch up i know everybody in my life is going to be watching it and i just want to watch it so that i can like be a part of the conversation and i know it's a really good show but i have a hard time watching more than one show at a time like i can't do that and i just got to the fourth season of the sopranos i love that show so much girl you need to shut the fuck up about the sopranos and just i posted it on my story one time and like multiple like at least 50 maybe even 100 people all the replies were what show is this what show is this which is insane because it really

ages it because it started in 99 so it's a 24 year old show oh my god what's her name nurse jackie in real life she's she's in nomadland she's not but that's francis mcdormand um but they have the same vibe and i literally said that exact same thing to josh yesterday um someone already is shouting it at us wait yeah it's but it's another she's a major act she's like literally one of my favorite actors eddie falco like yes like carmella yeah she's one of my favorite oh my god she's nurse jackie yes and i swear to god that show will literally change your life and how you perceive certain things like it's really really really it's another masterpiece and it's another

role like you were saying in fleabag where it's like a woman like experiencing like real things and not just being written by a man it's fucking crazy oh my god yeah you would love it literally my body is numb because i can't believe I get to watch her act more. I love Carmella. Carmella is icon, icon, icon, icon. Fashion icon, mother, slay queen, real. I need her to do certain things though. Cause like I couldn't be a Carmella,

but she's so brave for being a Carmella. Cause in reality, I would be a Carmela but she's so brave for being a Carmela because it in reality I would be a Tony I would be a cheating thieving lying fucking bitch bastard ass slut exactly with your coca-cola um okay and then I'll give you some songs I've been on a really ambient vibe nothing in particular I've just been listening to like my playlist the heart wants what she wants um another moment where i was like journaling and depressed and trying to kill myself not trying to but like thinking about it and i thought i was literally serving with that name um but creek by hiroshi oshimura anastasia 102 by afx Twin, Cross Selling Oval,

The Test of the Machine 2 by... The Test of the Machine 2, Everyday the Field, and Port Gentle by Porter Ricks. Also, fuck, what's the title of the Dean Bl song um the new one is it the new one i think he dropped like three singles recently it's i think it's one of it's his like most popular song 100 oh um that song is like wait he dropped one oh i'm dumb i'm thinking of baby father which if i'm correct dean blunt is a part of baby father because i think baby really three people that that might be the most low my mind false information of all time

yeah yeah no he dean blunt is baby father that's crazy i literally never knew that like for some reason i feel like that's wrong and i'm scared of somebody fucking yelling at me and being a goddamn cunt about it dean blunt of hype williams has shared a new track as baby father yeah and that would make sense i love baby father and i love dean blunt and because i remember when i first started listening baby baby father i was like this sounds like dean dude our baby father arc was so crazy i know um but super high school vibes but in the best way um well mine my media is they long to be close to you the cranberries cover i just love it because i feel like her singing that octave is really sweet because it's like

it's a very nice cover but it's like not the best cover i don't know i was listening to it with a friend and they were like you do like this cover and i was like yeah because it's like sweet white nights by psychic tv is such a good fucking song that album dreams less sweet is so fucking good far east man by george harrison is probably one of my favorite songs i've heard in a long time and i've been listening to it a lot a lot a lot recently um casalia by Finesse. I don't know how to spell that. And I'll give any Arthur Russell song, but the Deer in the Forest part one is really good. And I'll give one more. High Flying by, I don't know who this is by. That's the problem is I can't read.

After Give Me Those Songs. Hiro Masa Suzuki. Do you remember all the songs that you just said? Because I made a playlist on my Spotify that I just added them to. Do I remember the song? Oh, to share a playlist or just for you? For me. Oh, here.

They're all right here. They Long To Be Close To You by The Cranberries. White Nights by Psychic TV. Are the cranberries or the carpenters? No, it's the cranberries cover. So it's the carpenters, but it's the cranberries. Another, the C. We'll do this after.

Okay. But well, now into the realism. up y'all it's about to be a ride you won't be seeing us for a while we're going away we're leaving you we're taking an indefinite break yeah we don't know how long we'll be gone but we will be back make sure you stay posted make sure you keep up turn on your notifications go on instagram.com follow us um we'll definitely keep you guys posted but you know i'll mainly speak from my part because i feel like a lot of it is me um i have not been my best i hate having to be serious it's so fucking annoying um i haven't been feeling my best it's been i think something that's been bubbling up inside

of me for a while now and as most of you, I'm really good at being like, I just have caveman brain. I don't know. I don't know. But me thinks I've been in a bit of a disassociative state. This is real. All the Fortnite is very telling. Yeah. All the Fortnite-ing.

I can't wake up at any reasonable time anymore. I can't sleep at any reasonable time anymore. I've been unhealthy in multiple ways in my life. And avoidant and scared and pretty numb and just not my best. And I just, it's, I think it's starting to reflect personally in my work on my end of things. And I just want to be the best version of myself if I'm going to be doing the things that I love and I want to be loving the things that I'm doing. That's the biggest thing. And yeah, that's the biggest thing right now is I'm not loving doing this. And not to say I don't love doing the podcast.

I love the podcast, but it's been bringing me a lot of unwarranted anxiety and like sadness for some reason. So I get on here and I just don't feel like I'm performing my best. I feel like I could be giving a better performance. I feel like I could be a star, but I'm a star, but I'm not doing that. I really thought I was going to cry, but I don't think I'm gonna because I'm just like, I don't know. Like we've all heard me cry me cry no cry we need to make it a thumbnail and then make the title something big is coming something big is dying um but yeah i just like haven't been happy and it doesn't really have to do with the podcast as much as it has to do with my own issues um and i guess i don't know

part of me is like i don't know that it's like necessary to dive into them but yeah i just it's been a sadness it's a sadness lingering um yeah i feel bad i don't really have much to say but I just haven't been very feeling very fulfilled um in a lot of things I'm lacking motivation I am lacking satisfaction I don't remember the last time I did something and I actually felt satisfaction out of it um which is upsetting because my life is super awesome but I don't feel awesome at all. And I'm hoping that it just like kind of picks up and passes and that if I just step away and... Yeah, I just, I want to feel good about the things I'm doing.

And I feel really insecure in a lot of ways. Not just visually, but I'm just not feeling my best. And I want to like recoup and figure out like what makes me happy and like what satisfies me. And I think I just got a little bit lost because i haven't been doing a good job of upkeeping my mental state and i've been definitely putting it off because i hate having to deal with this because at the fucking age of 24 every year it's just annoying to know that like the feeling lingers like she comes back, it follows. Creed 3. But yeah, I just, the basis of it is I just want to be happy. And I think that like when I am, or not happy, because I don't think in this like, whenever we come back, I don't think I'll, it'll be like, phew.

Like in that short amount of the feelings I've been having. And also we could take that time to like improve on things and just make this all around like a better experience for not only me, but you guys. Yeah, that's like another thing is just, I mean, I'm sure you felt it. It's gotten repetitive and like, it's gotten like, just not boring because I don't think we're boring. I don't think anything we ever create will ever be boring, but it just doesn't have the same like energy it did in the beginning. So we're coming back in a few weeks and we're going to like refresh it. It's going to have a little facelift it's not gonna

change don't be afraid we're gonna be back don't be afraid but yeah we're just we just don't have an exact timeline right yeah exactly um but yeah we're just we're both feeling that way like just something is up something is a brewing and which is literally seasonal depression exactly yeah we're just lucky enough to be in a position where like we can step back step back and be okay and we hope like um you guys understand that like that's just needed right now yeah and um it's so funny because our last break was like we're going to japan like fuck you bitches we're out of here now it's like i literally help me i was just i was like help me he goes like help me yeah no his is so good dude he like whisper screams um but yeah hoping i find joy in my life

um hoping i can wake up before 1 p.m you did today you did good i know because i had to today i like have work to do but um yeah that's the other thing dude i know it's bad when i i literally like can't wake up and i'm i was in new y New York and I'd like to get up and move around and I went there because I was like feeling like this in my head I was just like you know what like maybe running around and doing the things I do here will make me happy but I literally felt absolutely nothing and I just slept in most days till 2 p.m. and then couldn't even get ready to get out of the house before the sun was down and i was like oh this is i've been here before what's funny is i got um a like you know how instagram gives you like the oh a year ago today is i literally posted a year ago today but

it was or it was like a year ago like in a month later and it was like uh-oh here goes that pit in my soul that i don't know how to fill like it's so annoying because we we literally like both of us experience this every single year and for some reason a year passes and like by the time the year has passed I've completely forgotten that I've just gone through this and so I feel like it's this new experience that I'm experiencing and it feels new and it feels even scarier than it ever has like it's just anxiety and it's just like I don't know how to process these emotions especially when I'm like performing for all the time but like yeah it's it's something we literally deal with every year

and we just forget that we dealt with it last year and like yeah i don't know yeah i mean also then like every year there's it's easy to forget too because every year during this time or during any time there are things happening in your life that can cause anxiety whether it be work related relationship related family related all these things so then because you're also facing a new set of problems the feeling is so like yeah it feels new and foreign because it's like you you're so convinced that the way you're feeling these things because of these problems but then we always sit back and we're like oh no i've literally it's insane because in three

months i'll look back on this shit and i'll be like i cannot believe that i felt that way like i know it's it's so funny like it's so so weird that like i'm like i feel the way i feel right now but even it could even be a week like it's insane how like I know one day you just wake up and it's gone and I'm hoping it leaves soon but I think I also need to definitely make some movements to make that happen because I've been getting a little comfortable in it and again I do think me for like the past like three months being like i have nothing to say because i literally have had nothing like i have nothing in my head it's crazy spreading ourselves thin like we've been moving too much we've been like traveling a bunch which like yeah is like a blessing it's a blessing

that we're able to do that but like also like we were not designed as like literal like critters to do that like so i think for me at least like i'm trying like i i said at the beginning of the year one of my resolutions is like my year of rest and relaxation like i don't want to travel as much like i just want to be here and i've already traveled way too much and I already have too much travel planned but I'm just that's like my fucking addiction like if it wasn't Percocets it's gonna be travel yeah it's gonna be like moving around yeah I don't know it's it's like a plethora of things but definitely I just need can I have a moment of silence but then I think about it I'm like dude that's literally genuine February I just sat in this house and what did I do?

Like when I look through my camera, it's actually disturbing because I had friends being like coming into town. And like when I went to town, be like, what have you been up to? And I'm I just don't have an answer because I sat in the house and ate the same thing every day for three weeks. But whatever. that's okay i hope you guys can understand um you know when we're back maybe things will be a little different but in good ways only good ways um and yeah let's just say i won't be here yeah let's just say i'll be back if tomorrow. Just kidding. Just kidding. Just kidding.

Oh, no, I meant like I'm quitting. Oh, you're going to quit on me? Yeah. Oh, my God. Wow. Okay. First Kai, now you. So it's like everybody's just leaving me.

All right. Well, thank you guys so much for watching. At least I do feel like this was a good episode to leave off on, hopefully, unless everybody thinks otherwise. But if you do do keep that to yourself because i actually am nobody i posted my story and deleted it and i saw somebody reposting me like girl we know or somebody replied it was like we know like in my dms um but i was like nobody knows i'm suffering through a mild depression right now um but yeah all right thank you guys so much for watching and listening.

And I hope you have a fabulous, fabulous next few weeks. We'll see you sooner than later. Fear not. Because Emergency Intercom will return. Ooh, I'm getting nervous. Bye. Outro Music