Emergency Intercom - the Hey Incident

Episode Date: October 16, 2021

How Enya fell in love with Drew and the events that transpired... Follow Enya on Insta: @EnyaUmanzor Follow Drew on Insta: @DrewPhillips09 To listen to the podcast on YouTube: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercomPodYT Don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercom If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: bit.ly/EmergencyIntercom Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey Spotify, this is Javi. My biggest passion is music. And it's not just sounds and instruments. It's more than that to me. It's a world full of harmonies with chillers. From streaming to shopping, of Emergency Intercom. Episode 15. We made it. We made it to 15. I almost said, that's three weeks in a row.

What is that, like three, almost four months? Almost four months of consistent weekly posting that is like us being offended when people are like what the hell and like yeah bitch it is shocking it's shocking it's shocking but we're here to stay baby you can't get rid of us hopefully just wait till we start making money i know i was gonna say gonna say, I mean, we're here to stay as, like, if it turns into something. But by this time, we thought we'd be able to, like, pay a bill or something, but...

No money. We haven't. We can't even pay Kai. We've got free interns. We're free workers for ourselves. Literally... No, never mind. I was gonna say, we're doing all this work for free for them. Like, they're getting us for free. I think they've always gotten us for free, though.

So, like, that's not that crazy. It's not like we're, like, Netflix stars where, like, usually you'd have to pay a subscription to see us. I want booking fees per video. I want age... If everybody who watched this video sent us $10, that'd be awesome. Well, that's why we were going to start a Patreon.

Yes. But not for $10. Because literally, what would we do for $10? A lot of shit. There are people out there who would give you $10 a month if you practiced three times a week trying to learn how to do a backflip. I'll do it. I swear to God, I'll do it. The thing is, I know if you tried to do a backflip, you would be the person to, like, break your fucking back,

and I'd have to be wheeling you around. I would... No, I think I could land a backflip if I, like, practice for a while. You're... I don't think tall people can do that. Yeah, I think that's, like... Eh, maybe not, actually. No, but I could do a backflip if I, like, practice for, like...

Like, give me six months, and I'll be able to do a backflip. This is literally, like, when you watch the Olympics, and you were like, I could be a sharpshooter. Like, give me two months. Okay, literally, but, like, think about that. Like, you just stand still and hold a fucking gun and shoot it. Like, that's the easiest thing ever. You don't train physically at all. Yes, you do.

You think because you go to war once a week on your fucking PC. On Call of Duty. I haven't played in a long time. Good, girl. I would go into your room and it'd be like steaming, which doesn't make sense. You should be playing it when it's cold. But I guess since Brandon's wedding is coming up, is that why? Yeah.

My brother's getting married. Congratulations, Brandon and Rachel. I love y'all. I love y'all so much. I'm sorry I'm not going to be there. You flaked last second. Did you know that uh this is perfect to bring up on the podcast they've already ordered your food and it's 85 a plate

and now they have an extra plate of food i'll drive there i'll go for two days and then come back let's do it i'll do it if you kiss me. Kiss me. Okay, do we get into the topic or do I get what's on the forefront of my brain out? And then we can get on the topic. Get on the forefront. Get on the forefront. Yes. When you said that, I imagined you handing me a gun and, like, pushing me.

We need to start going back to war. Yeah, there hasn't been, like, enough war. Yeah. That's why there's so much, like, tension in society right now. It's because all the men are just at home and we're just not at war. Send us away and life will be good again. That is actually very interesting. I wonder if that correlation has been made before.

I wonder if that thought has been made. I hate that, like, your face genuinely turned, like, hmm. Like, you believed yourself. Yes. I hate that like your face genuinely turned like, hmm. Like you believed yourself. Yes. I guess, I don't know. I don't know if the world was any better. Bitches like couldn't drive cars. No, bitches could drive cars by then. Yeah.

We had like tanks and airplanes. Bitches could drive tanks. I have to get what's at the forefront of my brain off because my brain is actually on fire right now. There's like two very important things. Three. The first one being that I need to let y'all know because I tell y'all about all of Azul's bowel movements. At 6 30 a.m today I woke up to the sound of like gagging and like coughing and I looked down and Azul was just looking down at her vomit that she's thrown up onto my bed and I literally sat up and I was like staring at her and she was looking at me and I think I like moved to go like see where she threw up and she like ran away and I wish I got a picture of her because like a little bit of

sunlight was peeking through and it genuinely looked like the alien standing in the doorway. Like that was Azul in her shadow. And she was standing there so shameful just staring at the floor for, I'm not kidding, like 20 minutes. He knew he did a bad thing. He didn't mean to do it. No, he didn't. I wonder what though. I bet he fucking.

Well, I caught him chomping on my plant again. The reason why I left that there is because there's a dead leaf on the ground and i'm like if he's gonna eat anything he can eat this dead leaf and get it out of him and just eat my fucking plant but i need to order that spray because he's destroying all of my plants yeah that whole corner is just fucking mangled now he munches on i think he could get to my room my big long fine plant he's been like chomping on since it's like why is he doing that all of a sudden? It's actually driving me insane. It's because he wants more attention.

I'm going to give him attention. That sounds like you're going to hurt him. Ew. And then the second thing is, actually, this is not important to talk about, but, like, bad baby. I can't believe, believe like that's a person that's kind of it she's kind of awesome like in her own ways oh no this is what i was gonna say i think she's trying to tell people she's mexican there's a mexican flag in bad baby's bio

and she's been looking like hella pale but like like the makeup is like going towards like a caliuchis vibe yeah i saw that caliuchis is mexican but like she's inching into latin every time i see her she looks different like completely different and it actually blows my mind um but she just has the Mexican flag up. And then I was like, no, is that the French flag? No, that's the Mexican flag. Maybe, maybe she has a little bit in her. Maybe she's like 25% or something. Or may, wait, wait, wait, let me see before I like call bed baby out. Oh no, no, no.

It's the French flag. Okay. What? Like why? Or is it the Italian flag? Wait, what is the Italian flag? Oh, maybe it's Italian. I think it is the Italian flag okay what like why or is it the italian flag wait what is the italian flag oh maybe it's italian i think it is the italian flag i don't know what all these because she is like italian oh okay dude i wish it was the mexican flag i didn't i knew that the emblem is in the

middle of the mexican flag but in my head i was like oh i guess they didn't put it on the emoji because like that's just like so small you won't see it um but i saw that last night and literally was cracking the fuck up because imagine like bad baby just entering her mexican hair she freaks me the fuck out legitimately scares me like if i saw her on the street i'd be terrified of her she talks up but she like like flexes how like quote unquote petite she is all the time it's like very odd i was like doing heavy stocking and she's like i'm 87 pounds i'm 93 pounds because she's 4 11 so she's like do you remember when she got into that fight with i forgot who she fought but like was it malu yeah maybe it was malu i

don't know i remember her fighting someone and it was like it broke the internet for a little bit she just breaks the internet constantly like she knows exactly how to piss everybody off. She gives very like Miami, Florida behavior. So I'm like, let's not expect anything of that baby. Like when, like,

of course. Yeah. Like what the, a lot of the things she does are wrong, but like, why are we holding out? Hope that bad baby is is gonna come to the internet in any form of pc like form no one day she pulls up to the internet and like

just with like minimal like alexis wren makeup and it's like hey guys and like that's my favorite arc like literally like whoa vicky had that arc like she was like the worst person of all time and now she's just like a christian who like loves children and like wants a child like her arc was like crazy my thing is like what i try to remember is think about how bored you are and like the people watching like have like jobs and like go to school and like have like these full lives in their own towns and then think about like think about how bored you can get even though you're like leading a full life where you have like responsibilities think about how bored whoa vicky is like and like people like bad baby and then think about if you had that much

free time there's a chance you're gonna be a piece of at some point because you are so bored and also like when the money's right like people do stupid shit for money at any time of their life yeah like squid game like i'm so glad the documentary was made about that i know like that needed to actually be talked about yeah because like the lengths in which someone will go for two for money and like how they'll just like turn their back on i can't believe that happened in real life like no one is talking see that's why that's one of my problems is like school doesn't teach you like important things like how to do your taxes and squid games how to win squid game i mean technically like the recess like you do learn a little bit but we didn't grow up in korea so we'd

fucking die i'd be like what are these games someone posted and they were like india and druid win the squid game and i was like yeah we probably would like we're kind of maniacal like i'm sorry but i forget his name but the dude who like fucked everybody over at the end and like 119 yeah 119 like that's how i would play the game i'm sorry like i just would be i would be a devil like i couldn't play fair i would be an asshole and i'd do anything to win because i want to live see that's where we're different because i relate to four five See, that's where we're different. Cause I relate to four, five, six. I'm like,

I like, I would immediately emotionally get attached to everybody around me and then like be trying to make sure they live with me. Yeah. But no, I'm, I'm kind of, I'm like a lone wolf.

I'm a popular loner. I would have to have sex with, um, 67 and the girl she partnered with because you probably miss, um, in the behind the scenes um that's what that episode actually like um met that was the like special meaning of the episode everyone was partnering up with who they wanted to have sex with oh yeah so i would probably they would probably i would be like the girl who didn't get a partner and then they just throw me into

like a threesome with one of them. And I would pick 67 and like, I don't know her name or her number. That duo literally, I don't know. Like I love both of them with my whole heart. Yeah, I mean, I have a deeper intimacy because we did have sex. That was the most heartbreaking thing I've ever experienced in my life. Legitimately the most heartbreaking thing I've ever experienced. I know.

No, I like you saying that's the most heartbreaking. Like actually, like that made me cry like so hard. heartbreaking thing i know no i like you saying that's the most heartbreaking like actually like that i that made me cry like so hard i was literally like i was showing my friend on the phone yesterday like what i look like when i use my ipad and i literally like lay back and since i don't have a we don't have a case to bend it on or anything i literally put a pillow or a plushie on my chest and then put the ipad there and it's this close to my face and i was like and like like looking away and like pausing and like crying and like yeah and then continuing it yeah i cried in the bath it was awesome oh i cried in your mom i

was literally no one talks about this but how i was literally the first person to watch squid game like i actually was the first person to watch it they like showed me before everybody it like actually like i did i did like it you were up at like whatever no they emailed it to me via dropbox. That's really risky to be sending something. It was 100 gigabytes. I feel like that shit was way more than 100 gigabytes. Yeah. Okay, well, let's get into this episode.

Because we've been talking about absolutely nothing for the past 10 minutes. Well, you've got to give them a feeler. Make our watch time go up. It's like when someone makes a video. No, they clicked off. They already clicked off. But when the big thing doesn't happen until later no there's that one motherfucker who time stamps oh yeah for us i haven't seen him in a while though i know he may have passed yeah and i don't know if the playlist updater is still there for spotify

damn it's funny how people just like stop caring about they like change they switch up they pray on your fucking downfall and then they they get it. It eventually comes true. Okay. Okay. So we're here today to talk about the hay incident. The hay incident. I think we've teased this for four or five years, literally since we've known each other. Yeah.

And I think now is the perfect time to really dive into it um makes me uncomfortable a little bit because it's embarrassing it doesn't well it shouldn't be embarrassing for you bitch it's embarrassing for me because i could not read a room no it's embarrassing for me because i just froze that That makes sense, though. I was very extroverted and fucking annoying. And I brought it up a lot. I was not cool about it. I was very annoying.

So if you don't... How do we do this? If you don't know what the hay incident is, we're talking about the time Drew literally ghosted me and fully rejected me and destroyed my ego. He gave me ego death. So we'll start from the very beginning. So how long ago? Six years ago we met each other? Five years ago in person?

We became friends in late 2014, early 2015. And then we met. So we've known of each other for a while. And then just through. So like we knew of each other. We've known of each other for a while. And then just like through the Internet and like whatever. But like we never really spoke online. We just kind of like we're in the same crowds and like really just knew of each other. And then we finally met in person on tour. Yeah.

And I think before that I had finally we followed each other like a few months before yeah because christian was the reason i got on tour and you were close to christian yeah so then i was like oh i should follow the people on tour so it's like not weird yeah um but yeah um so we met each other for the first time in 2015 um and it was in miami and inya got invited to one of our tour dates and yeah it was it was a good time it was like it's awkward at first obviously like we did have sex immediately yeah it was really awkward it was gross we took each other's like virginity like immediately it was really gross um in the middle of the like banquet hall where everyone was watching um but no when i went i remember i thought i would hang out with like christian and

like michael more because like those were the people who i knew more out of everyone but it was actually you like i we like hit it off immediately. Twin Flame, like, soulmates, like, legitimately. Platonic soulmate sleigh. But, yeah, we literally got along instantly. And then, I think, after the show. Oh, no, we even did our table together. Yeah, we, like, we did, like, a little duo thing together. Damn, that's actually crazy. Like, immediately, like, pairing up.

And then we did it every show. Yes, from then on. Oh, that's so sweet. I never thought about that. But, yeah. Oh, yeah, because our tickets weren't even being sold as like we weren't even having duo tickets at that point that's crazy yeah it was literally just separate and then we just were like let's just combine our tables because i felt like we already had like very similar audiences because we were like monsters online like we were like evil people online um but yeah but yeah we like hit it off

immediately we hung out and did our like meet and greet table together the whole time and then after we like walked to starbies together starbucks yeah and i don't remember anything we specifically spoke about but it was very chill like we got along really well and then there's i remember thinking like oh like this is weird because like whenever i meet new people i'm like so closed off and like genuinely like not like myself um and that still is like even today and it took me like weeks before i was like comfortable around christian and michael and like i remember immediately i like felt like normal like i just like could be

like a monster with you i was what you needed yeah exactly and you were what i need you and i was what you needed okay yes yeah and i'm striking out um i'm tweaking um i'm tweaking out man mikey mikey that's how that's go get him go fucking get him the way you do your job's perfect so me and drew were getting along the funny thing is too i don't think we spoke that much outside of tour. Or maybe I'm tripping, but I don't. Not immediately. Yeah. I don't even think, like, when we were in the, like, really thick of it of being homies. I don't feel like we were, like, huge phone communicators.

But maybe we were. We were. Yeah. We were texting, like, literally almost immediately. Like, we were, like, texting, like, almost every day. I mean, like, not, like, at first. But, like, I remember, like. Yeah. As I got into it. I, like, considered you, like, my, i mean like not like at first but like i remember like yeah as i got i like considered you like my like one of my best friends um and i was like

this is about to be my best friend okay also for like context um not to demean your attractiveness or whatever but this was a time in my life where any boy or person in general who gave me the time of day and actually like spoke to me a lot and gave me a lot of attention and like was very kind to me i was like we should date yeah i was like and it doesn't help that i'm like literally absolutely sexy like drop dead gorgeous like um just like bulging all over i don't know if you were like gray sweatpants challenge every day you were always in those gray sweats i was in those nike tracks i know literally in your nike tracks and like weird shirts yeah um my metallica shirts i could not name a single metallica song the metall Metallica Thrasher era? Dude, okay. Band T era, Justin Bieber Purpose tour merch era.

Like, we need to burn that shit. That is where fast fashion began. Began. That was like the start. That was the moment fast fashion looked at us and was like, I'm about to take advantage of you. I'm about to beat this bitch's ass. But yeah, I like just thought everyone who was nice to me like i was like i should date them like that's two plus two equals four like we get along why aren't we kissing um so i don't know if

it was like immediate but i think and i personally like when it happened i didn't feel like i was like leading you on or anything i genuinely was like oh like we're just really close friends but maybe i should have like like thought about it deeper no, I don't even think it's not like I showed signs of having a crush on you. Like there was one time. What? No, there was one time. You know what I'm talking about? Is it Boston?

With Cody next to us. It was like, yeah, it was Boston. It was a hundred percent Boston. Say hello to Tim Selectss tim's everyday value menu enjoy the new spinach and feta savory egg pastry or our roasted red pepper and swiss pinwheel starting at only 2.99 plus tax try one or try our full tim selects lineup terms apply prices may vary at participating restaurants in canada it's time for tim's boston i was brave yeah i remember i was very brave in boston yeah i was a prude and a virgin i would like never like actually make a like an actual move that's the

other thing like all of your like moves were so subtle and like weird it was just like it was just like it was unreadable yeah it was just something that you could like still yeah i don't think i've ever been good at like hitting on people or like making it known i like them but especially when i was like 16 and like just into karen i was like this is what someone wants like i think like as far as i know this is what tumblr has taught me so this is what my fan fix taught me so um but yeah and i i don't think it was very obvious at all but in my head it was like a blazing i was like it's just i think every like especially like teenager does that when you have a crush on someone you read into everything they were doing also another thing is like i was just a crush

whore and i feel like everyone goes to that phase but like i had a crush on you i had a crush on like two guys at school i had a crush on like a close friend of mine like i had a crush but i was at the top of the list yeah come on but you'll always be at the top of my list girl um so yeah and i don't i think it was like 2016 yeah the hay incident happened like late 20 like middle 2016 maybe i think top 2017 it was like right before we moved out no it was like a year or almost two years before we moved out here i wish we had the timeline perfectly laid out but basically i think i could find it because i have to find the i have um a screenshot of the hay yeah so inya like was yeah like sending me signals i wasn't reading them like i i feel like i'm pretty good

at like picking up when like people have like crushes on me or whatever and i like yeah like because i'm easily like crushed upon like i just get it so often yeah it happens to you literally people are all over september 8th 2016 oh wait no, wait, no, no, no. The actual text, I don't know when it was sent out, but I had posted something that said, hashtag never forget, hashtag survivor. Oh, so it was literally way before that then. Yeah. So then it was like 2016. Okay, let's keep going.

Which is so brave of me to post on an account you follow. That's like so mean. I was a cunt. But yeah, so I don't know what at what point i was like fuck it maybe it was after this boston incident where i was like trying to be like no but like i'm so hot like also we were like sharing beds and again like i can't i'm trying to like kind of cut around it okay i'll literally just say i like slept in my underwear next to drew and i was like getting closer because i was like i was like he's gonna hold me like i was like he cannot resist and like i was like it's like get off of me and he was just like so i know i genuinely i don't

even remember that there was another thing that i was oh wait i don't remember i don't remember that's what i remember is i remember i was like i'm gonna be crazy and i'm gonna be like i didn't bring like pajama pants and i'm gonna sleep in my underwear also it's not even like i had sexy underwear i had like fucking like gap ass underwear which some would argue that like that's sexier than like a thong especially if you have like no ass like me it's like embarrassing to wear a thong for me but yeah i was thinking of was when it was like me you and cody ryle and we were like all in a room and what i guess it was boston and like you no i do not remember doing that literally happened yes yes i drew i did not remember that that happened stop because like that's way worse yeah that will get bleeped out i think around the time when i was like fuck it i'm just gonna text

him like because a few of our mutual friends knew um because i would like tell them that i did and like they would all be like i i think it's like boat goes both ways which is like a fucking lie like bitch tell me the truth um and at this point i was just like it's not fun anymore i'm just like bored and i'm just gonna say it and like see if he says anything in response and literally the text is so like 17 year old me brain so this is this is exactly how it went down so So, it was a Tuesday. At 3 a.m., like, cool. So, at 3 a.m. my time. Oh, no, it's like 1 a.m. my time. But it was on, like, a school night.

So, whatever. I say. I was awake. I remember it vividly. I said, as if you didn't already know, I have the fattest crush on you. So, I wanted to tell you that I do indeed have the fattest crush on you. And then. And then I ghosted. I didn't say and then i ghosted i didn't say anything and it was like hours like i had seen it no it was like almost a full day yeah that's what i meant like it was it was a long time and i just completely ghosted it i didn't want to talk about it because i was like

no like i actually like hanging out with you like don't ruin this but little did you know that like for me i was like all right okay fine like this i was but her but it was like more funny to me like the whole thing for me was more funny but i'm glad you like were caring about not wanting to like muddle our relationship but again i was like a crush whore and i had a crush on literally everybody it was like actually fucked up and then i would lead a bunch and then almost 24 hours later i just responded hey oh wait no actually it's hi it's not even hey i responded hi and then i almost immediately was like hi and then nothing then nothing. He didn't say anything after that. Because I was like, I don't know how to fucking address this.

I don't crush on you back. I didn't have a thing for you back. So then later that night at 10.52 p.m. You're just not my type. I say, yeah, because I'm not inside out, dad bitch. You're just not my type you know i say yeah because i'm not inside out dad bitch you're just not my type if i was inside out dad though and i said and i said this to you would you go for it yeah i would have felt like flat fire in my stomach and my heart would have exploded into a million butterflies if i would have felt it in my penis tip if i was um 67 you would reply instantly yes from squid game you would be like hello hello

hello exactly yes yes me too me too um mama mama so then that's how i responded mama but what if as 67 i didn't like being called mama and i found that really weird and i was like okay like don't talk to me anymore i'm baby girl my girl oh also for more insight is like for like i had a crush on drew but i it wasn't like a true crush like when i think back to it it literally wasn't an actual crush it was genuinely like i just immediately loved this person but i couldn't because especially it was like a man in my life. I couldn't separate the two ideas of like, oh, this is someone I like actually just love on a platonic level

versus this is someone like I have a crush on because realistically I did not want to, like I would think about like, oh, what would like making out with Drew be? And never once was I like, I need to do that. And I would say that, which was so annoying because I would say that to all of my friends. I'd be like, no, like I'm not like sexually attracted to him

or anything like that. And it's not like i'm an asexual person i was very fucking horny but i had no want to like make out with you or anything like that um but i'm just saying you want to make out with me now no i would literally i we've talked about this us having sex now would literally be so fucking funny it would be the worst thing ever and like so like ew it would just be funny like i like saw it i saw it in my head i saw it in my head um but yeah and i would tell this to all my friends and they'd be like girl that's because you're a prude and i'm like no i've definitely looked at other people and wanted that but like i don't know harry styles yeah like nile horan drake um but yeah i like so i i think i'm saying that because i want to make it clear that like there was it wasn't even gonna go anywhere but it's such a funny thing but that night at 10 52 i say hi and then that minutes later i say hi back and then i was being a fucking cunt because i was like cool fucking poking facebook poke game

we're playing so i just sent him a screenshot of our texts and it's high high high high and like us saying hi like four times in a row to each other um but my friend at the time like a close friend of mine at the time who was friends with drew um i sent her that screenshot and she printed it out and like took a picture with it um so it's good to know that all of my friends were making fun of me behind my back because i know it was all the girls like getting together having a key making fun of me and then i was just here oblivious to the whole situation and it's not my fault i didn't have a crush back on you and that's okay because realistically now that i know you very well and we know each other very well i would actually rather die than us date like

but i feel that about all my friends because it's like now you don't go in like with rose-colored lenses yeah you know everybody for their flaws you've seen me cry i know i've seen you be a fucking brat and you've seen me be a fucking brat piece of shit so it's like um yeah well i wouldn't date you either is this you're like coming around the bend arc you want to date me i wouldn't date you either me and drew will get married if we're not married by we have to push it past 30 because now i'm like 30 isn't old enough if we're not like we're gonna like finally like be hot when we're 30 yeah by 30 that's when i'll start like getting interest is because it makes me very happy when i see people like 67 from squid game because she's like 28, 29.

And I'm like, she is so fucking hot. And I look at myself and then other 22, 23-year-old girls and I'm like, I just, I don't look like that yet. Like what's- When's my time? When is my puberty? When is my womanhood gonna like really set in? Like I look like a woman, but I wanna like look like a woman but i want to like look like a woman

yeah i want to i want to serve like orion woman yeah and but yeah we we made like a pact that we were going to get married when we were 30 and have children i think it was 40 i'm pretty sure it was always 40 it was i know i think because we we said this when we were like 18 19 19 20 and we were like 30 is so fucking viejito like far away like ew um and now we're like almost like don't say it at the i don't say it halfway point so it doesn't seem that far so being like when we're 30 i'm like bitch i won't even have a house when i'm 30 like i can't do 30 or i'll have a house when i'm 30 um but yeah we have this pack we have a blood pact where we're gonna get married when we're 40 and have adopt children we could have children i'll take a viagra

thanks a lot i'll inseminate you i'd actually rather fucking end my life um but, we could do that thing where it's, like, you have to go, like, do your business in a cup, and then they, like, put, like, a turkey, like, the thing they put. Baster. Yeah, baster in me, and they just, like, give it to me. Our kids would be pretty. We would have cute babies.

Maybe. No, we would have cute babies. We'd have cute little, like, Hispanic white babies. Honduran white babies. Do you have blue eyes? No, you have brown eyes. What the fuck? I wish I had blue eyes.

Dude, growing up, my siblings had Dante's if he had hazel eyes, and that's all I wanted. I was jealous of Madeline's eyes growing up. She had, like, green brown eyes. That's hazel eyes and that's all i wanted it's always jealous of madeline's eyes growing up she had like green brown eyes that's hazel sis no like the insides were green and the outsides were brown i think that's hazel sis well but yeah and i don't even know how it flushed out i know i brought it up to him all the time like i would be like annoying like we'd be hanging out and i would just bring it up and be like hi and like be like really annoying about it honestly legitimately unless i trauma blocked this like i remember just like moving on from it yeah it was not personally i did not have a second thought about it i wasn't like oh this is like awkward this is gonna be weird now like i remember

we like we're probably together that next weekend and like we probably hung out the entire time but yeah legitimately like it didn't cross my mind as uncomfortable i wish we had like maybe spoken about it back then but it probably would have made things fucking even i know like just in teen brain it was like whatever moving on like it was not that big of a deal yeah i literally i genuinely don't think i thought about it for more than it was just funny and i knew going into sending that text that it wasn't gonna like you weren't gonna turn around and be like oh my god yes and i didn't want that anyway because like it literally i feel like so many people can agree with that the fun part about having a million crushes is that it's gonna go nowhere and it's literally just like also crushes literally feel good it's like a dopamine hit yeah it's just fun to like engage in whether it's like reciprocated or not that's another thing

like i bet depressed people have more crushes because it feels good to like have a crush on people and like every time you see them do something you're you're immediately rewarded for that and you get crazy amounts of dopamine and serotonin pumped into your brain probably because i had hella crushes and i wanted to you feel me i feel you but yeah i think i just moved on and it was literally never spoken about and then i went on to date so many people and have so much sex like oh my god like i can't even don't get me started like i just was like always like seeing someone and having sex and since we were sharing rooms it was like the

same bed as me yeah and we are awesome a lot and in bed with drew you know oh actually you know what is the only thing that i think made me think maybe we you liked me back is when we would like do stupid videos where we were obviously trying to act like we were dating and that is something that i see a lot on the internet and i'm like y'all are playing a risky game because i was doing my bs makeup yeah like i was lucky that i walked away and i was like that's not real and like whatever but there were moments where i was like wait is this a thing because we were like so like good at like putting it on for a camera. I'm just an actor. I'm an actor. You're a fucking piece of shit. Leading me on.

Yeah. No, but. Yeah, that's like the beginning of our fruitful relationship. Yeah, and now we've been dating for seven years without telling anybody. I mean, like, kind of. Like if, like, we see each other every fucking day. Like, we hang out every day. I would not want to see anyone i'm dating every single day of my life that sounds like a nightmare no one can tolerate me the way i mean you can't tolerate people the way you tolerate me i was trying to think of

something mean to say but i was like it would be too real if I was like, I fucking hate being around you. But yeah, and now we have a very sweet, loving, platonic relationship. And what's crazy is we still kept sharing rooms and sleeping together and doing the whole thing. And it literally was not a big deal. Yeah, it genuinely wasn't weird at all. I miss those days when you could just move on. Now everything hurts. Now everything hurts. Now it hurts.

Now it feels like a stab in the heart. But yeah, that was that. And I don't even know how to end it. Basically, I get bitches. And I can pick and choose who I want and who I don't want. And Inya, I'm sorry, but you were a rotten apple. I don't know where the fuck i was going with that um but yeah that was that um maybe one day we'll get into like the stories of the tour days because that shit was fucking batshit crazy that was the act we'll

do that next episode because that was legitimately like the most insane time of my life like yeah like the stories from that fucking the tour days were like not chill and not even like oh like rock star stories but like literally like nightmare like children in like a not okay situation yeah like in a diabolical situation i mean like if that story is like anything to like take from tour like this scenarios we were put in were like diabolical yeah because also like a bunch of like random like horny bored teen kids should not have been it's not gonna end well yeah it's like i'm to have a crush on my bestie. Like you're. You're making me do it.

But yeah. And then now. We live together. It's literally nothing. I could not. Neither of us could imagine dating each other. Literally. I think some people.

Maybe still hold out a hope. That that's a thing. Yeah. And I'm sorry to break it to you. It will literally never happen. Like it will never happen. I've seen too much of Inya. Yeah.

Yeah. Just see me like burst into tears multiple times and be a fucking maniacal evil piece of shit so and vice versa he i get crazy i get crazy i get crazy i get crazy also imagine like dating 16 year old me thank god i wasn't dating anybody when i was a kid a teenager because i was la toxica to the max i was like i mean if those if that screenshots anything you literally screenshotted our text and sent it back to me like it would have been so you would have tore my shit up you would have fucking ate me alive i would have put you in your place yeah you literally would have you would have been a different person i probably would have like you

would have destroyed me to the point where i was like i can't i can't keep doing this and i would have dropped off the face of the earth and like um just tended to my fish tank and never posted online again and that would have been maybe a life you liked it would have been the best fucking life imaginable like me at fish conventions like selling coral and like rare fish. Like that is my fucking dream. Or like a reptile convention selling lizards. Like, oh. Literally me in 2019 when I was like so determined to leave the internet and be a barista. I've never talked about that online.

But when I was like in the rut of my depression, I was like, dude, I can't do this social media. Like I actually can't. Like it's destroying me. And every single day I would wake up and go to the coffee shop I liked and like talk to the baristas. And I was like, I'm going to do it. Like I'm just going to work here. Yeah.

I remember like that was a whole phase. And then we were like, okay, but like, what if we opened our own coffee shop, which I still think would be fucking awesome. Yeah. I've always wanted a coffee shop, but I can't even put somebody down. Like in 20, but like hiring people to just do all the work for us like but like we design it and make sure the coffee tastes good and like yeah i think i think i liked the idea of like building a space and i i've like always had a love for coffee

so i was just like a coffee shop like making a coffee shop would be like the best thing i could ever do in my life no this was as far back as like 2018 when we first moved here yeah no this was like other than like our second tour like this is the first thing we were like planning on doing and then it just never happened um because we can't even get a fucking investor for a podcast so i don't know why the fuck so i thought someone would give me money to it actually is insane how people literally don't care about us and that's okay because it's a very humbling thing. Like some people call paparazzi on themselves and like go to Nobu every day, even though they like can't even commit to eating

like the good fish there. And they go there and they like eat the fucking rice and then leave, which is like why go to a nice sushi restaurant if you're going to eat like the fried chicken and like rice or like the steak and rice whatever that's just me we should just become villains like we should literally become the villain i'm like i i toy with that idea so often just becoming the villain of the internet and really fucking

leaning into the role and let everybody just fucking hate me and call me names but at the end of the day like i can't all publicity is good publicity but i get called ugly once or i get called boring once and it literally eats me alive for three weeks yeah i know the people who like live that life are just like in a different reality i genuinely am so impressed by like the worth ethic of like other people in our industry no because genuinely like does nikita dragon have a therapist like does she have a therapist does she just do the like crazy shit she does then puts her phone down like maybe that's what it is it's like these motherfuckers just post crazy shit and then literally put their phone down but there's no way because they're also self-absorbed they have their screen times are all 18 hours like it's literally like not chill

like the only time they're off their phone is when they're in the club and even that they're like with their fucking led like um ring light led ring light selfie cameras like dude just not the life for me i'm like not the life for me i'm good begging my followers for patreon sub and sitting down next to the candle next to the candle that's gonna burn drew's plushie alive drew's been i've been doing set design yeah he's been sprucing up the set for y'all so that's like what i've been doing with this oh my god when it gets actually cozy we should cozy we should like set it up like fall style when you get back and like lean into the dude the only thing about that is like also now we're just talking and then a christmas tree right here it'd be cute the only thing about that is that we have

to set this shit up every time we film it's fucking terrible yeah i know we need that's another thing we need a patreon so we can get a fucking studio and a cool set. Like, that's what I want. Our original plan was like, oh, we're like, oh, trust me. The second we put an episode, sponsorships are going to be flying right at us. Letting us. They're going to be fighting for their time. We got one email.

And it turns out maybe we're not profitable. No, we are. Just give us a fucking chance. Give me a chance in here, baby. But no, we decided we're going independent. We're going fully independent. We're funding this ourselves. Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you.

You're funding this for us. Oh, wait, no. Love you, love you, love you. Mercury is not in retrograde. No, it is. You got a chemical imbalance, babes. Like, let's talk about it retrograde no it is you got a chemical imbalance babes like let's talk about it no it is very interesting that every time mercury's in mercury's in retrograde i feel like i don't exist like for the past i don't know if you could tell but for the

past four episodes three episodes maybe four i legitimately have not been present um the last episode i felt like that but you know what it is like sometimes in life you just have to really really push that feeling down like you're just like really like there's just this weight of despair and like lack of motivation and there's absolutely no lust for life and you might think like you know i should talk about it i should figure it out but then once you get to 22 you're like you know what this feeling is gonna be here for some time so you gotta just get up and you gotta put all your weight on it and push it down and push it down to your feet and by the night time it's rised back up to your head but it's too late because you're tired and you're going to bed so you don't have time to think about it or you get on your iphone all day on your fucking ipad

and watch ipad iphone tv have them all blasting yeah at your senses at once spotify just blasting noise into your ears and so you literally can't think about these there's no time there is no time that's a lie i have a therapist and it slays um i have performance anxiety i think no because i felt dead before even the podcast i don't know we'll figure it out hopefully i become alive again i have felt dead ever since um the drinking the night where i almost died um so maybe i literally need to go to the doctor and figure that out because my brain has been foggy since then also what i will say is you were on a really good run of eating healthy like not to be that

annoying person but you were having your like this is so annoying you're having your like air one meals of like you were eating like kind of i don't want to be that person but you were eating like for the most part like predominantly like vegetarian but you've been doing that you've been having like curry which doesn't have any meaning but yeah you were eating like your meals like twice a day getting your little bevvies in my bevvy i don't know we'll see we'll see i'll probably just snap out of it dude that's the thing that's such an unhealthy mindset that i have is because when i was like 16 and like the most depressed i've ever been in my entire life one day I just woke up and I felt totally fine. And now that I'm like a grown ass man and an adult, I'm like, Oh, like one day I'll just wake up and

it'll feel good. But that's just literally not, that's not how it's going to happen. I'm gonna have to do the fucking work. Life is ebb and flows. Yeah. You will have to do the work. And, um, you know, therapy doesn't fix it, but it makes it easier. You've been trying to convince me to go to therapy for two years. I think I tried. Not happening. I try to do it because genuinely it has helped me so much. And like, I feel like I've seen like very dark places and you've heard me the way I was

when I was in those spots and literally like, they're a sleigh. They should start calling it TheraSlee. TheraSlay. TheraBay. Slaycology. I'm going to school for that now. So, yeah, we have to like.

Slaycology report. Yeah, we have to tie this up because I have a UCLA like Zoom meeting about my psychology class the toxic or psychology report is like what they do on you after you have a night of yossing they like review your your yas boards yeah your yas levels um my i need to think i popped way too many yas pills last night i literally can't stop yassing um i'm uh i'm trying to think of one day bacon strips i'm trying to think of one for dope sick i'm slay sick so fucking dope i'm literally so slay sick right now that was like the gnarliest era of my life when i would just lay in bed in the morning and not get out of bed and like call you and josh in my room be like i'm dope sick i need dope um it's fucking fun um but yeah i'm allowed to i know i'm like don't fucking question my jokes about substance abuse

because you don't know my fucking life you don't know anything about me fuck you i don't know you fuck you maybe i'll get into that one day subscribe to my patreon fuck you i hate you fuck you bitch i'm literally i'm no i'm not kidding i am this close to inching back into being a fucking maniacal psychotic bitch fuck you i hate you that's what i was saying like it would be so fun to be the villain but like it's just not sustainable and yeah it's not because that was like i wasn't even doing it to the level like other people were doing it but that time in my life was the most like turmoil i've ever felt um and it was so unenjoyable um because you would get like this rush of it rush of adrenaline which would turn into like embarrassment

and shame and like self-degradation. And like, it's just like, it's quite the cycle. But I guess these motherfuckers are also like too busy being drunk and like fucking silly anyways. I wish, I wish I was sociable. I can't do it. I don't know what happened. I just can't do it anymore. Like literally the two weeks of hanging out, three weeks of hanging out that we've had

has actually, I genuinely think made me feel this way. I think I just need a break from society again. I think I need to go away and lock myself in the woods. You're going to get your text in slow, though. Yeah, but I need to go, like, away. Solo? Not solo. I can't go solo.

I need to go somewhere in the woods and just reset. I know that's so lame to say, but legitimately, like, I just need to reset. No, I don't think that's lame to say because I, like, was going to Big Bear and, like, shit like that for a minute and it was the slay of my life.

Yeah. We're just different. Like, I'm always out and about and, like, my life is a movie and your life is, like, a really sad, like, Edgar Allan Poe poem. I'm the main character, though.

Main character syndrome. Okay, we need to end jesus christ please stop giving me your hardest battles i'm so weak i can't handle it anymore no i just want to talk about this real quick um oh your shirt i have secretly been blaming everybody for the loss of this shirt i blamed my mom i was like she stole it from me i blamed india in my head i was like she stole it from me it's in the back of her closet like she has it I just blamed everyone I was like someone stole this shirt from me I haven't seen it in months and I was just I did like a deep cleaning of my closet this morning um to find like slacks and sure enough it was at the very bottom of my

pants pile which was so random but i found it and it was dirty as shit and it smells really bad but i threw it in the washer with a wet sock and a dryer pad and de-wrinkled it and it still smells like shit but that's my story that's my story i found my shirt i that actually just made me think i had a muchacha shirt but i gave it to josie because it was like my boobs would take up all the fabric and it did that thing that small shirts do when it flares out and it like makes me really uncomfortable. That's like how this one does, but I kind of like my lower back showing. It's like a reverse crop top.

God gave the biggest tits to his weakest soldier, which is me. I don't even have that big of boobs. There are people who look at me and they're like, girl, can you shut up about your boobs? I wish I had your breasts. breasts my beautiful luscious breasts god gives the biggest balls to his strongest soldiers and that's me i have a short butt crack like because i have no ass dude you can find something to be insecure about like all the time like you literally find a new insecurity like once a week and i'm like girl like a you're a short ass crack that makes no sense like why is that a thing if you saw it you would scream i have literally seen your ass before

and it does not make me scream you have i've gotten it makes me scream without the yes always gotta have one of those zingers in there for the clips for the tiktok clips right no jack clip that um but i have gotten so comfortable literally like almost everybody i've met has seen me like undressed for the most part oh yeah um and i don't care because my body is not a wonderland it is literally a vessel that i am fucking stuck inside of your body may be a temple my body you staring at the flame i don't even know where i was going okay so media of the week squid game slay squid slay she's so late like i saw it first like he did i he was the first person i heard talking about it and he was like oh like um i was like it kind of sucks but it's like fucking awesome it's just like brain dead you just watch it and enjoy it um but now that i've like let it marinate it is really

fucking good um okay so it's squid game for me also oh my god um i was gonna say movie i literally was just about I've been watching like The Simpsons Which isn't that interesting I think I said that in the last episode Um And actually I

Watched Nightmare Before Christmas last night Because it's that time of the year Duh Oh my god Like those kind of movies never get boring No they're always good I'm never tired of watching those Um

And then Do you wanna go for music first? No, you can go ahead and finish your whole thing. Shut up. I want to talk about this album because the listeners are going up. But I only say that because I found them when it was at 400. And now it's tripled in the past year. And I'm scared.

But I don't want it to be a thing. I don't know why like what is in my head that i don't want people to know about music i don't know do i just let go of it like since or save it for the patreon oh if you want our deep deep cuts deep cuts go on because look at this look at this album that i made today um this fucking album private but like the girls want i heard you listening to like this half of this this morning and this album ah this album and this album literally remind me so much of like my happiest moments in 2020 it pisses me off have you listened to this album no and their their song is one of the better songs on that album and also them and also just them being on that album is fucking crazy dude no that whole like collective album is fucking awesome and all of those like

cuts that they did together as a collective oh okay we'll talk about that on the page yeah if y'all want the real deep cuts the real good shit the real stuff we're listening to subscribe to us on patreon just don't fucking post it on your story bitch fuck you yeah literally also i'm about to start privating all my fucking playlists like i'm sorry these girls gatekeep the girls are finding my playlists and posting all my music from them and normally i'm like why gatekeep music like i don't give a shit but now i'm like but now y'all are posting like the really deep shit from my playlist and i went through and removed all of them because i'm like y'all i'm not kidding this is so annoying when i

heard you listening to that one album like the one that i'm like this is my favorite album ever when i heard you listening to today i was like i went through your place to see if it was in there because i got like a shock of panic i was like oh my god it's like if this becomes like i went through your place to see if it was in there because i got like a shock of panic i was like oh my god it's like if this becomes like i think i'm gonna kill myself even though like i don't know why i like i have the cd so i don't have to think about like that becoming a thing like i don't know why i gatekeep i gatekeep because i have such an emotional connection to this music and i know i don't want other people to be like me because i have an individualism ego and i'm a fucking freak and i fucking hate you fuck you bitch don't post on your fucking story subscribe to our patreon please um okay what is your music um well actually i'll give this one because this is like also one of my favorite

songs ever but it's a cover of a cover of a cover so whatever but the chances of you knowing it are like so low because like i'm just like very cutty and like i like do the research and like i'm different and i might have big tits but i know a lot about music um wait that's possible yeah i know big tig girl no music what inga dinga durgan big tig girl like doja cat she don't know nothing else um didn't want to have to do it it's a cover of like i think a song by like the spoonful but this version the version that is the best one is by cass elliott that song literally there are certain songs in the world that i don't think i like would ever do it but certain songs i'm like i want to just make a cover of this like actually

like it like certain songs make me want to genuinely learn how to fucking play the guitar and like make covers in my room because i'm like this song is fucking awesome and i want to like built it this song is so awesome i want to like colonize it and make it my own and like i want people to hear me because i want to i want to somehow make this about me. Let's make it about ourselves. So that is one of my songs. And then someone's going to laugh at me because this is genuinely the only Wilco song I care about. Is it Jesus Don't Cry or Jesus ETC? Whatever the fuck it is. That one song is like, Jesus don't cry.

I love that song actually i need to know now um yeah jesus etc yeah um that song like for me is so good i haven't really been able to get into other um wilco songs because i don't know why and then an album i'll give is ambient volume to the plateau of mirror harold bud brian eno um and if you want more like boring shit like that you have to follow the patreon but that album is like such a good album harold harold bud is so good r.i.p um imagine i grabbed my coffee and like poured one out for him right now i'll pour some candy out for that fucking album is so goddamn good um if you want to feel like shit and cry and like shit yourself have i talked about this i think so but i would i think you've mentioned it lightly once but i would mention um it's like a japanese horror that is

just fucking so fun to watch it's super campy and like there are some actually really scary elements that i was like whoa like how the fuck were they doing this back then it's really like like a groundbreaking movie um and it really is just like super good it has a good story it may and like there's some really beautiful shots in it like in the beginning um that i've even like painted from because i was like it's literally just visually so yeah it's like it's just really really fun um it's not the most scary movie in the world but oh my movie rec is mars attack because that's literally one of the best movies ever and it used to scare the fuck out of me as a kid i love mars attacks so good and then i'm seeing killer clowns from outer space on friday

um and if you really want to just like freak the fuck out watch waking life um But watch at your own risk because that'll ruin your whole month, week. My music is It's Nice to Be Alive by Vegan. It's a really pretty song. Strawberry by Doss. And Daisy by Strawberry Machine. And those are my three songs this week. That was the episode we slay

everyday my bae in our own way you're gay thank you guys for watching this episode bye Outro Music Bye.