Epic Real Estate Investing - 3 Ways You're Sabotaging Yourself and You Don't Even Know It | 947

Episode Date: March 4, 2020

There are 3 things that the majority of people practice subconsciously, on a daily basis, that control their life and sabotage their results. Therefore, Matt shares three short-cuts to move these habits from your subconscious to your conscious so you can control your results and live your life to the fullest! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is Terrio Media. Success in real estate has nothing to do with shiny objects. It has everything to do with mastering the basics. The three pillars of real estate investing. Attract, convert, exit. Matt Terrio has been helping real estate investors do just that for more than a decade now. If you want to make money in real estate, keep listening. If you want it faster, visit R-E-I-A's.com.

Here's Matt. Hey, Matt here. Welcome to another episode of the Epic Real Estate Investing Show. It is way back Wednesday. This is the day where we reach back into the archives and pull out old classic episodes. And we've been reaching back into the archives of the Do-Over podcast, the podcast that started it all. And I got another great one for you today. Enjoy.

During an era where countless people, businesses, and organizations are feeling the pinch, running out of time, running out of money, Losing confidence, feeling as if life is unfair, praying for another chance, and unless something is done, life is going to pass them by. Fortunately, in the nick of time, there is now a place where the ignored, underestimated, and unknown steps to producing results and making life work are revealed. Save your career. Save your business. Save your health. Save your relationships. Save your life.

Get from where you are to where you want to be, faster, and with greater ease than you ever thought possible. Say hello to your do-over. Welcome to your do-over. This is the place where I show people who want more out of life, people dissatisfied with their current situation, people who are sick and tired of just being sick and tired, or even people that are cool with life, but just want more out of it.

I mean, this is the place where I show them all how to start, over and begin a new life, setting goals and objectives so that they can create wealth, create financial freedom, create the lives of their dreams, and just live that life to the fullest. And you can get your do-over started fast by laying a solid foundation where you can download the three pillars of creating the ultimate do-over. And you can get that for free at freedover.com. It's a 55-minute MP3 audio program that I put together that I made just for you with three specific steps on how to get success as you start over.

And that's yours for free at freedover.com. So today I'm going to call this episode the check-in show. You know, together, we're going to check in to see how your do-over is going. And it doesn't matter whether, you know, you're just getting started or you're right in the middle of it or you've been giving it a go for a while and you're quite possibly considering doing over again. I mean, it doesn't matter where you are. I mean, if life is moving along great for you,

you've got some momentum going, you're getting results, awesome. I'm really glad to hear that. But if I asked you why, why are you getting those great results? Why do you have those momentum? Why are things working for you? What would you say?

What would your answer be? What's causing your great results? Now, if you're on the other side of the coin and life isn't working or isn't working as well as you'd like, what would your reason be as to why life is less than you want right now? I mean, whether you're getting good results or bad results, do you know why? I mean, whether you feel good about it or you're depressed about it,

do you know why you're feeling good? Do you know why you're depressed? What's controlling your destiny? I mean, is it the economy? Is it that new job, not really what you thought it was going to be, or it's more than what you thought was going to be? Is it the new business that you've started? Or is it that more customers are patronizing your company or your product or your service?

Is it that you can't find a job? Is it that you're just always tired? You know, I get that way sometimes. Sometimes I just always feel tired. I understand that. Or is it that, you know, the stock market in your sector is booming. Things are going really great in your particular sector. Or is it that the real estate market in your area isn't bouncing back

fast enough. I mean, what's controlling your destiny? What is it? I mean, it really could be anything, though, couldn't it? Or could it? Or could it just be one thing? I mean, could it actually be the same thing for each and every one of you? I want you to think about that. Because, you know, regardless of what you think is controlling your destiny at this moment, whether things are great right now are not so great. There is only one thing controlling your results and ultimately controlling your destiny.

And that one thing, that one thing is the decisions that you're making. And those decisions, they can be divided up into three categories or three specific types of decisions. And these three decisions are, the first one is,

it's what you decide to focus on. What you decide to focus on. because, I mean, you can focus on what happened or what's happening, or you can focus on what you want to have happen. That's a decision that you get to make. Second, what you decide to make things mean. What are you making things mean? What are you deciding to make them things mean?

Because, I mean, you can give things any meaning that you want, or you can just accept them as things, as things as what so. That's a decision you get to make. The third type of decision is what you decide to do to create your results. I mean, do I turn left or do I turn right or do I just stand by and wait? I mean, those are all decisions that you can make and they're decisions that you have absolute control over. So those are the three decisions and they will determine what you notice. They'll determine how you feel and they'll determine what you do.

And ultimately, they'll determine the contributions that you make and who you become along the way. The decisions are so important. They're so big. And, you know, here's the big distinction, though. Are you in control of your decisions? Or are they in control of you? You see, when you control them, you consciously decide.

You control your life when you control them. You control your results. You control your destiny. Nobody or nothing else does. I mean, you get to say what goes. no economy, no job, or lack thereof, no co-worker, no boss, no associate, no friend, no family member, no customer, nobody, nothing. You get to control that.

It's your decision. You see, most people are stuck. They're stuck dwelling on what's happened in the past or what's happening at the moment. And when you are, when you're stuck in that way and when you're focused on what's happened in the past and what's happening right now, you lose power, you lose your vision, you lose momentum,

and you lose progress. It's your decisions about what to focus on, what things mean to you, and what you're going to do about them that will take you to where you want to go. And the great news about that, it's your choice. It's your decision, you get to decide,

you are in control. Or I should say, you have the ability to choose to control your decision. By focusing on the past, you typically make decisions either out of, you know, reflex or fear. And for example, I've been in a sales, I've been in, I've been in sales and in some capacity, pretty much my entire adult life. And I've been fortunate to represent some really great products and some really great services. And the one customer objection that I never quite understood, and it came up frequently, but I never really quite understood it.

It was when someone chose not to make a purchase because they said, it sounded too good to be true. This sounds too good to be true. I'm going to think about it. It just doesn't make sense. It's not adding up. It just sounds too good to be true. I'd hear that all the time.

And when I heard that, I mean, it was obvious they were focused on some bad experience in the past. It was obviously that they got burned somewhere. And that's understandable. I mean, we've all been burned. We've all been let down. We've all been disappointed. and we carry that experience with us into the future, and we make new decisions based off of that past experience.

But here's the sad part about that. I mean, unfortunately, most people walk away from an experience such as that with the wrong lesson. They think they have some life experience, they've gained some wisdom, and now they're wiser and smarter moving forward, and they choose not to do things based off that past experience, but that's really like the wrong lesson.

they walk away with I'll never try that again you'll never catch me again you'll never burn me again that's their lesson that they walk away with you know as humans our greatest weakness is giving up

it's not trying that's the greatest weakness I mean if it didn't work back then you can decide to never try again and if you do that what do you get you get the same thing you got when you never tried at all

and if you're happy happy with the same thing fine hey i'm not forcing you to to try again i mean if you're happy with what you got then great however i mean you probably tried whatever it was because you weren't happy with that same old thing so you can accept the same thing or you can try again and sadly people decide it's too good to be true so i'll just settle for what i've got i mean the most certain way to succeed is to try again. The CEO of IBM, he always said if you wanted to double your success rate,

double your failure rate. And you got to try to be able to fail. So you can decide to remove your focus from what happened and place your focus on what you want to have happen and decide what to do differently to get what you want to have happen. Not, I'm never going to. try again. No, I'm going to try again. I have to try again to get what I want. But I'm going to have to do something differently to make sure I don't get what I got back then. And, you know, these are all just

decisions. It's probably the greatest gift that God gave you. Well, again, I've said this before, I think. It's the second greatest gift God gave you. But you own the gift to decide, the gift of free will. You own it free and clear. So use it. Don't let it use you. Just know that if anyone is enjoying greater success than you in any area, it's simply because they've made and continue to make these three decisions differently than you in some context or in some situation. It's really that simple.

If anyone's out there and they've got a greater success than you in any area of an area that you're trying to get success in specifically, it's simply because they've just made and they continue to make these three decisions differently, and they're making them differently than you are. It's that simple. So decide what to focus on. That's number one. That's the first decision you always want to make. I'm going to decide what I'm going to focus on.

No one can tell me what I'm going to focus on. Okay? And the simplest yet most useful way that I can put that into effect for my own life and I haven't found anything simpler. If you come across something more simple, please share that with me. but this is pretty darn simple. It's going to be hard to beat. Focus always on what you want to have happen. Focus on what you want to have happen.

Not what's happening and not what happened. Okay. Focus on what you want to have happen. Next, decide what things mean to you. You get to decide what they mean to you. And I'll give you a couple examples. I mean, I remember hearing a while back, and I might have used this example on this show a while back also.

It's been a while. We've been here almost two years. Isn't that amazing? Anyway, I remember hearing about two brothers that grew up with an abusive father. And one of the brothers became a very successful businessman in a pillar of his community. And the other brother ended up in prison for life. And later on down the road, they were interviewed. And I forgot all the details.

And forgive me, I didn't know I was going with this. But I give this example a lot because it really makes a great example. I use it as an example. And, you know, the details aren't really that important for this purpose. But the reporter had asked the successful brother with such an abusive father, how did you become so successful? And his answer was, with a father like I had, how could I have been anything else? And when the reporter asked the other brother, the one that was in prison, the same thing about his life, where did it go wrong? How did you end up in prison?

and his answer was, with the father like I had, how could I have ended up anywhere else? So the point here is, the two brothers grew up in the same environment with the same father, but they each decided to make what having an abusive father meant.

They made that decision. I mean, for one, it meant, this means I can't end up like him. I'm deciding I'm not going to be like that guy. And for the other meant, it meant that, you know, this means I have no choice. choice, but to end up like him.

So he decided to end up like him. That's what he made it mean. Here's another example. Say if one of your close friends insults your driving ability. They say, you're a terrible driver, George. You're a terrible driver, Cindy. Whatever it may be.

I mean, that means one thing to you coming from one of your close friends, right? I mean, you might, uh, maybe I am, you might take it to heart. Maybe I am a bad driver or you're foolish. You don't know what a good driver is. a terrible driver. However you're going to make that mean, it's going to mean one thing to you.

But if you have this motorist that's driving down the freeway alongside you, and he looks over and in some shape, former fashion, insults your driving ability, it means something very different to you, doesn't it? You see, what happened was your driving ability was insulted. That happened in both scenarios. Your friend insulted your driving ability, and that motorist next to you in the lane over, in the lane next to you, they insulted your driving ability as well. That's what so.

But in each scenario, you decided to make it mean something. And in both scenarios, you decided to make it mean something differently. But the same thing happened. You decided to give it different meaning in those two different situations. I mean, could you have not just laughed off the insult by the total stranger on the freeway in the same manner you did when your friend insulted you? You could have, haven't you? Couldn't you?

I mean, if you did, would that have had an entirely different impact on your feelings and emotions at that particular moment? And likely throughout the day, it could have affected your whole day. And if you got all upset and insulted that other person on the freeway back, you know, who knows where you would have ended up or how you would have, how that emotion would have affected the rest of your day. I mean, you could have made that decision, right? absolutely. You get to decide what you make things mean. And by deciding what you make things mean, you control your emotions. Because the meaning that you assign to something is what conjures up the emotions inside of you. And there's a saying when emotions rise, intelligence falls. And you know that Tony Robbins, you all know, hero of mine, you know, is my first exposure to personal

development and is absolutely instrumental in my entire life's success. He had said, and I'd forget where I read this or I heard it, I'm not sure where, but he said if he was going to give credit to one thing, to one thing that was responsible for more of his success than anything else, it was his ability to control his emotions. That's what he says has given him the greatest power for him to achieve, for him to control his emotions and you control your emotions by what you attach meaning to or what you make things mean, what you decide to make things mean. So when you look at that and I look at that old saying that when emotions rise, intelligent

falls, you get it. Because when you get all steamed up, you know, you get a little stupid and you make bad decisions. And together, those deciding what you feel. focus on and deciding what you make things mean, they'll control your third decision that you get that you have control over. What to do next. And what to do next is also a decision.

But a better decision can be made if you first decide what to focus on and then decide what to make things mean, then deciding what to do can frequently be a very easy decision. I mean, you can call it the power of positive thinking or call it the law of attraction. I mean, call it what you want. But that's how it works. It's not just your thoughts. What it is, it's your thoughts that lead to the meanings that you attach, that lead to your emotions, which ultimately lead to what your actions are.

It's not just about meditating in a living room and praying for thinking about money falling from the sky and it's going to happen. No, that's not how it works. That's not what they meant. So, you know, call it what you want, but your destiny is ultimately controlled by the decisions that you make. and specifically the three decisions we just discussed. Now, the majority of people, however, and this is where, I mean, everything I've just said might be common sense to you. Okay, yeah, I get to decide.

All right, fine. Well, the majority of people don't decide consciously. That's the difference. They don't decide consciously, especially when it comes to these three crucial decisions. And they are crucial. Don't get it twisted, I like to say. And because we don't decide consciously, we pay a major price.

And, you know, life, it can be viewed as a river. It's a metaphor that seems to fit for many of life's teachings. And most people, they just jump into the river without ever really deciding where they want to end up. And because they don't, and because of the river's strong current, people get caught up. They get caught up in current events. they get caught up in current challenges. They get caught up in current fears. And I actually borrowed that right there, that little bit,

from Tony Robbins himself. I just fit perfectly right there in my analogy. And now I believe that's the third time that I've given him credit for that. So now it's mine. I don't have to give him credit anymore. That's the rule. That's what they say.

And, you know, when people are traveling down this river and they come to the forks in the river, they don't consciously decide where to go. So they merely just go with them. the flow. They do what everyone else does. They are directed in life solely by their environment, by the current, by the flow. And because they do what everyone else does, they get what everyone else has got. Mostly an unfulfilling life. And sadly, they remain in this unconscious state until that one day when the roaring of the raging waters and the rapids wakes them up. And they notice that

They're just five feet from the falls, from the giant waterfall. They're about to go over, and they're in a boat with no oars. And at this point, it's too late. They're going over. They're taking the fall for sure. And that fall, it might be an emotional fall. It might be a physical fall. And it might be a financial fall.

Or maybe a little bit of all the above, or a lot of all the above. I mean, I know I've been over each one of those waterfalls in my fall. life and and looking back each one of those falls could have been avoided with some better decisions upstream and that really goes for not really it does go for whatever challenges you're dealing with right now they could have been avoided with some better decisions upstream so there it is you are where you are what decisions can you make right now that can correct the course or make the course even better. What are you focusing on right now?

What could you decide to focus on? Here's a hint. Decide on what you want to have happen. Make that decision. Decide on what you want to have happen. Ditch the past. Ditch the current events. What's bothering you right now? What could you decide to make it mean instead? What are you attaching meaning to that's bothering you?

right now. Here's a hint. Give it no meaning at all. Give it no meaning at all and just let it go. Let go and let God. Give it no meaning at all and just let it go. And here's the third one. What are you currently doing about it?

Is what you're doing working? What could you do differently to get a better result? The result that you're actually looking for. What are you currently doing right now? about it, about what you might be, let's just say about your do-over. What are you doing about it? Or have you done anything in a while about it? Is what you're doing working?

Maybe you're working really hard and it's just not working. You don't feel like you're progressing. Is it working? What could you do differently to get a better result? What could you do to get the result that you're actually looking for? So here are your options. Depending on where you are in your do-over, you can either put both oars in the water, now and start paddling like crazy in a brand new direction,

or you can decide to plan ahead so you don't have to paddle like crazy, or you can do nothing and just go with the flow. The great thing here is you get to decide what to do from this point, this point of you listening to my voice right now. It's your decision. So take it. Don't give the decision to anyone or anything else. It's yours.

Take it. Embrace it and use it. That's it for today. God loves you and so do I. I am Matt, the do-over guy and I will see you on the next episode of your do-over. Thank you for tuning in to your do-over where the ignored, underestimated, and unknown steps to producing results and making life work are revealed. And remember, knowledge is potential power. Take action on what you learn today. This is not your learn-over.

It's your do-o-o-o-o-o. To view the resources referenced in today's show and to retrieve a complete show transcript, visit www. www. Thedover guy.com. Stay connected with Matt the doover guy Terrio on Twitter at the doover guy and on Facebook at www.facebook.com slash doover guru. This podcast is a part of the C-suite radio network.

For more top business podcasts, visit c-sweetradio.com. Thank you.