Epic Real Estate Investing - The Alter Ego Effect - Todd Herman (Interview) | 579

Episode Date: January 31, 2019

Todd Herman, an accomplished entrepreneur, who worked with many successful athletes and coached numerous business owners on high-performance leadership and business growth, came to our show today to tell you about the alter ego effect and how finding that inner self can help you achieve your goals. Learn what the alter ego effect is, when he first thought about this concept, and how you can use it to attain the desired results. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey, rock star, Matt Terry here at Epic Real Estate. Got a hot show for you today, a really good friend of mine, an accomplished entrepreneur. And we're just about to blow today's episode of Thought Leader Thursday. Up, stay tuned. All righty, so our guest today is an accomplished entrepreneur who has coached thousands upon thousands of athletes on developing their mental game, advised hundreds of business owners on high performance leadership and business growth. He's widely known for creating the 90-day year of program for business owners who are

frustrated with their level of performance and want a highly refined system to get out of their own way and see their business and personal leadership thrive. It's actually the same program that inspired the Epic 89 program here at Epic Real Estate, and I'm really grateful for him introducing it to me and allowing me the access. He has helped craft the alter egos of hundreds of professional Olympic and amateur athletes all around the world. It's how he built his name in sport, and he's just written a book around this topic. And it's why I asked him to be here today, to join us, to see what there is for us as real estate investors. of this concept of alter ego. The book is released here as we're listening to this and just next week on

February 5th. And I'm very much looking forward to reading it. So without further do, please help me welcome to the show, Mr. Todd Herman. Todd, welcome to the Epic Real Estate Investing Show. My friend, thank you for having me on. You're a champ. There's a bunch there. I wanted to make sure I to miss anything. So I was reading right from the paper. I don't think anyone could tell too much. But good to see you, buddy. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, lots of exciting things happening for you right now. What does business look like for you these days? What does it look like today? It's frenetic is what it is. I mean, we've got the, you know, I've got this traditionally published book with Harper Collins coming out on February the 5th. And so I'm graciously getting invited onto platforms like yours and tons of others.

So I'm doing a lot of travel, just doing the work. And then, of course, I've got all my private clients that I work with and then, you know, the other businesses that I have. So it's busy. Let's just say that. Right. Is this your first book? It's my first book. I'm dyslexic, so I pushed it back years and years and years until I finally couldn't

push it back any further. Got it. And Harper Collins, that's a big deal. Yeah, it was. I say this not to like brag because it actually is more about the power of the idea, but we actually broke a publishing record by having 19 publishers bidding on the book. And, you know, if someone doesn't know the publishing space, that would be like, you know, 200 homeowners or 200 investors wanting to bid on the exact same home.

It's really rare to get above even eight publishers willing to meet with you. But like I sell people, it's actually the more of the power of the idea. You know, alter egos have been used for centuries for people. People kind of dismiss it as maybe something that's only used for someone like maybe in sports, which I've got tons of stories in the book about that or entertainers. But like, how can I make that work for me as like a real estate investor or a parent or whatever, and I go into it in the book of just the scientific power of using it and how it actually brings out the most real version of you that there is.

Mm-hmm. The, you know, you said that's been around for a long time. It's actually pretty much a very brand-new concept to me. I mean, I've never really heard of it as a tool or as a resource or as a method for performance until I met you. Can you explain to me what is the alter ego effect and why is it important to performance? Yeah. So, I mean, well, I mean, the, the alter ego effect, the book, I mean, it talks about just the effect that alter egos have on people, right? And then there's the method itself that we use. But, you know, alter ego is it was first coined in 44 BC by the Roman statesman and philosopher Cicero. And it's the root of the term means the other I or trusted friend. And it's, and I'll come back to that in a second about

why that's really powerful for the people that are listening. But it's, it's about there's so many, we have this, we as human beings, the one thing that we truly have that makes us really unique on the planet as an animal is our creative imagination. I mean, you know this as an investor. It's like, you know, there isn't, if you only have one way to make a deal, well, best of luck with that. You're pretty one-dimensional. And it takes a lot of creativity to sometimes make deals work. I mean, I know that you talk to your crowd about that all the time. And so our creative imagination is the thing that really makes us unique on the planet. You know, our ability to love or our ability for affection and caring and, you know, gratitude for other things.

You know, those are all powerful emotions, but they're not unique to us. But our creative imagination, our ability as human beings to create stories in our head, to suspend the disbelief about what we can do and possibly channel someone or something else to get out there and do the hard things we want to go and do. Or to create a heaven from hell and a hell from heaven, which we can do, right? I mean, two people coming out of the exact same circumstance, one excels and one, you know, falls into oblivion, right? Well, one created a heaven from the hell and one created a hell from what could have been a heaven for them as well. And so this creative imagination is really important.

And what an alter ego does is it simply taps into that native power that we have and allows us to maybe move past some internal resistance that we might have towards the goals that we have and leverage someone, something else to help make that happen. And I mean, I know that you deal with that, you know, with investing crowds. It's sometimes it's, we get to a threshold of what we think that we can invest in. Like, oh, you know what? I do single family homes. I could never go do a multifamily type of thing, right?

Yeah, but I know in the inside, because I work with, you know, high level, I live here in New York City and I work with high level Wall Street people all the time. I know, though. The fact that someone just said that means that they actually wouldn't mind having a multifamily home, but they just can't see it for themselves. But if they stepped into their intermaterio, you know, or like whatever the case is, or whoever it is, maybe that person can. Right. Well, can you give me an example of how you have, what are you first practically used this,

where you stepped into your inner Todd Herman and you thought to actually make a difference? Well, I mean, I was a highly recruited football player. I'm Canadian. I grew up on a big farm and ranch up in Canada, you know, moved all around the world and now live in New York City. But when I was playing sport, I ended up kind of falling into this concept

and using it. And again, it's one of those things where young people do it all the time. Like, I mean, this great thing about this idea

is I don't really actually need to teach people anything new. People already know how to do this because it's an innate part of the human condition. We've all used them

when we were kids when you pretended to be a cowboy or a fireman or Superman or your favorite, you know, baseball player. You're playing Don Mattingly at the LA Dodgers,

you know, super camp or whatever. Right. But so we've all used it. There's nothing complicated about it. It's just that, We forget that it could be used maybe in other applications. So I used it on the field for the football field.

And I had my inner alter ego on the football field was Geronimo. And Geronimo was actually a composite of a whole bunch of different characters. One was Walter Payton. You know, I revered him. Ronnie Lott, the great defensive safety for the San Francisco 49ers. And I'm a huge Native American buff. And so I built this like tribe in my head. And right before I'd go on the field, when I'm in the line,

locker room in my mental movie theater in my head, I would imagine Walter and Ronnie walking in through two separate doors and then the tribe walking in as well. And they'd approach me and Walter would carry the cards with him and these five trading cards. Three of them were Walter Peyton and two of them were Ronnie Lott. And he would hand me the cards in my head and he would say, here you go. Take a piece of each of us with you out onto the field and show up exactly like we would out there, but don't you for one second dishonor who we are and how we played by not showing up like we would. And so for me, it's about like when you're really going to take that idea with you, empower it by always staying committed to it. So that's what I would do. And then when I take one of Walter Payton's cards and I put it in my, because I had five trading cards, I put one of my helmet because I wanted to think like him out there.

And I wanted to see the field like he would. And then I'd put one of Ronnie Lotz in my shoulder pad and the other one of Ronnie Lotz. the other shoulder pad. And then I'd put the final two of Walter Payton's in my, uh, my thigh pads, because I wanted to run like Walter and I wanted to hit like Ronnie and I wanted to think like Walter, but I wanted to carry the spirit of the Native American tribe with me out there as well. And so that was myself. I'd go out there as Geronimo. Todd didn't still go on the field. Geronimo went out there. And again, I'm not a physical specimen. I'm not six foot four and 240 pounds. You know, I was six feet and 156 pounds soaking wet when I was in high school, But I played way bigger than I looked.

In fact, I actually, in one game, I broke two football helmets of my own right down the middle because I hit guys so hard. It doesn't make any sense to someone when they would look at me. But I did. I played at a high level for myself. Fast forward, though, and how it worked out in business, though, for me was after I got done playing football, I started volunteering at a high school, teaching the defensive backs football. or just, you know, the defensive side of it. And I'd spend more time with them on like the mental game. I'm like, you guys, you need to develop some better routines.

You need to, you know, set some better goals for yourself and need to use some like visualization skills. And so I'd give them all the toolbox stuff that I would use. And they started getting great results. And then a good buddy of mine in Canada is one of the top hockey trainers in the world brought me into his hockey academy. So I started talking to them. But I started getting really insecure because this started, it was rolling into a business.

And I looked like I was 12 years old. So I was like, who's going to listen to a 21-year-old talking about mental game stuff. I don't have a degree in this or whatever, but I had come in contact with a bunch of sports psychology people, and they didn't know Jack Squat about helping people perform. They were just, you know, booky people that were deep into the nerd stuff that wasn't actually working on the field of play. They were getting kids to think too much. So I knew my stuff was working, but I was stopping myself from getting out there. So I was like, well, just one day, I was like, wait a second, I use this idea when I was playing football. Why can't I use it in

in business as well. I feel insecure. I don't have the confidence to go there and do things, and I'm completely indecisive. So I wanted to be confident, decisive, and articulate. And I was like, well, how can I make that happen for myself? I wanted to step into a Superman version of me. And then just I thought of like the classic Clark Kent Superman thing, but I wanted to use glasses to step into the more Superman, not, you know, Superman put on glasses to become Clark Kent, the mild-mannered version of himself. So he'd be accepted by society. I didn't want to be mild-mannered at all, because that's how I was showing up already. And so I went out, and this is long before glasses became a,

a trendy sort of fashion thing. And I went to West Edmonton Mall in Edmonton, Alberta, where I was living at the time. And I went to Lens Crafters, and I bought a pair of non-prescription glasses. And this was, again, when it wasn't cool to wear them. And the optometre was like, wait, nobody comes in and buys glasses to like when they don't need them. And I was like, listen, just give me the glasses, please. And that's what I did. And I would put them on and I would step into Richard.

And Richard's actually my first name. But I would step into the, that was like my Superman version. And I would be confident and articulate and decisive. And that's what really helped get me past those insecurities to get out there and do the things I wanted to go do. Got it. So is that the process when you're working with somebody is kind of identify the deficiencies or the weaknesses and build the superhero around that? Yeah, exactly. And so, you know, in the book, I kind of walk through like the process of building it.

But even, you know, after chapter three, because chapter one, two, and three just build up like just the foundational part of it tells you the backstory, the history of it. I talk about stories of Bo Jackson and myself and his alter ego and then many, many other people throughout history that have used them and in the science of it. But then after that point, I even tell people in chapter four, listen, this is a choose your own adventure type book. If you want to go read about, you know, totems and artifacts like glasses in order to step into that alter ego, go right ahead. That's in chapter 14. And you can bounce around. But if I'm truly working with someone, I'm looking for those deficiencies, those frustrations, those ways that someone is, you know, possibly beating themselves up for not getting out there.

And, you know, so what aren't you doing right now? Or how are you feeling about your investor self, right? And that's what's, this is actually a really important point for people. People have to understand. And the mistake that human beings make, and it actually, actually creates mental health issues with folks is you do not operate as a single self. You do not take one person into every single area of your life and act as the same person, right?

Like who you are with me right now is, of course, going to be different than who you are with your kids. Makes sense. And we all get that. It's just that we don't take that and really start thinking of our life through that lens and acting with intention in the context of that space. And this is really important. Like, if I'm a mental game coach to investors right now,

I'm like, who and what needs to show up on that field of play in that role that you're playing as an investor that is pre-built to succeed. You know, suspend the disbelief about what you think you can and cannot do. And what resources you do and do not have, okay? Screw all that stuff. But what type of person,

would you want to bring out there? And then you define those. What are those qualities? What are those characteristics, those superpowers, those traits that you want to exhibit out there? Is that you want to be methodical? You want to be detail-oriented. You want to be someone who's shrewd.

You know, you're going to be someone who's confident when you're negotiating so that you can own the space that you're standing in and you're not going to take, you know, something that is less than what you should or whatever. Like, again, there could be many things. I mean, I'll ask you, when you think of yourself,

because, I mean, you're extremely accomplished. at what it is that you do. Like, what are the qualities that you developed that helped you become so successful? Belief, when you're learning something new, you're not going to look good while you're learning to do it. So be okay with looking silly as you're learning something new. The humility then. Yeah, I guess the humility. Of being coachable and all that.

When you take a look at the qualities and the characteristics of the people who have been, like, some of your best students. How are they showing up? Like, what are they doing? Coachable is a really good word. Resourceful. You know, not being so, not so needy. Oh my God, I'm stuck what I do. What I do in panic. Like, yeah, I guess calm and being able to be like, okay, I can't get a hold of Matt this very second. Where else could I find the answer? Being resourceful and not totally abandoning their intuition. Mm-hmm. Okay. And so if I'm asking that to anybody else, so if those are the if those are the qualities that you're going to bring, someone who's calm, someone who's resourceful, someone who when they're dealing with their mentor is someone who's coachable, someone who is

confident, maybe not confident, and it's not confident that you know all the answers, but this goes back to resourceful, but confident that you know that you can figure it out. Like for me, I know I've got that. I know I can figure it out, right? not because I'm smarter than everyone else, but because I know that someone else is going to quit on the treadmill before me. I just know that that's, so I'm persistent as hell. And I think that's actually one of the big qualities of people that I know that are great investors,

whether it's in, you know, stocks or whether it's in real estate, is they're persistent. You know, I think, you know, I would say, as I've seen a couple of friends get into, like, real estate investing, the biggest mistake is they thought they were supposed to find their moonshot on the very first deal. deal. And then they're like, oh, well, this doesn't work. And it's like, really, are you sure? Because I literally see tens of thousands of other human beings on the planet build massive wealth with this. So you're kind of full of crap with it. So, well, it's true. It's like so. No persistence is huge. I'd definitely add that to the pile for sure. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I mean, well, this gets down to your belief thing, right? I mean, I'm, you got to remember, I've been doing this

for 21 plus years now. I've been rattling around between the six inches of people's ears for a very long time. There isn't anything that I haven't heard quite yet. And I talk about it in chapter three of the book that there is, if you think of like the layers of how we develop ourselves, there's a layer called the belief layer that I kind of unpack and there's an infographic in the book that I walk through with it. It's really, really helpful for people as a context. But a belief isn't true. A belief is true to you, but a belief isn't necessarily true to me. Like if you and I are walking down the street together and we're both walking on the sidewalk, we can both point to the sidewalk and say, yeah, that's a sidewalk. How do I know that? Because you're experiencing it and I'm experiencing

it. That's truth. We look up with the sky. The sky is blue. That's truth. But you telling me that real estate is only for, you know, middle class white guys. That's not true. That's just your belief. Right. Right. And so I have to challenge people constantly on what's true and what's not true. and then are you willing to give up your belief? And so I think something you had said there is belief is really important. Yes. But what also is important is the willingness to give up old beliefs and accept new beliefs. It's like Bruce Lee, he always said to people when it came to training, you know, what does it take for me to get to where you are?

An empty cup. You can't come to me with a cup that's already filled up with your knowledge. You need to be willing to empty that cup and allow me to pour in my knowledge. and let it overflow even because otherwise my mixing my stuff with your old stuff, it just isn't going to work. And that's getting back to that idea of coachability. So long way around, many different conversations there.

But yes, we start with what are the characteristics that we want to bring to a specific field of play? Right. Okay. Yeah. Like even myself. So I wanted to be a, you know, who I wanted to show up as in business with someone who is confident,

articulate and decisive. Three things that I was not having a time. Now, in other areas, totally confident. You put me on a sporting field. I feel confident that I'll figure it out. But in business, it was so new to me, and I just lacked that confidence. And now, it didn't take that many or that long before I truly became that person. And so, but when I go home to my kids, I got three little ones, five and under.

And when I go home, do they want? confident, decisive, and articulate dad. Of course not. That's not what they want. So I don't wear these glasses around my kids. Instead, when I go home, I want to make sure that that role that I'm playing with them is the playful, the fun, the gentle Todd, because I'm a challenger personality. In order for me to work with the Olympians and pro athletes that I do, you know, they're around big personalities and tough personalities, I have to be a challenger to them. I have to challenge them because they have nothing but yes people around them. And I'm the exact opposite with them.

And it's very easy because I reinforce that habit of the way that I act over and overground every single day with all my clients, just like you would. It's so easy for me to just go home and continue to be the challenger personality. Well, a little three-year-old doesn't need that. It doesn't need me challenging them and getting them in their face, right? And so when I go home, when I started when I was when I was a new dad, I would, my middle daughter, Sophie, she's a, and I think probably everyone has one son or daughter that's like this where she has an emotional bandwidth that has very, very high highs and some fantastic tantrum lows that she can get to. And she has a decibel level that she can get to with her voice that just drives me mad. And so when she would be in that tantrum space, that force that was coming at me, I would stand up and I would bring my force to that.

Well, force versus force typically doesn't work in any situation, right? And then all you're doing is you're just sort of blowing your, you're sort of playing your large adult scary role on top of them. And she would have a tantrum that would last 15, 20 minutes because of that. And then I thought, wait a second, Todd. let's go back to this idea of the alter ego. Who would I most want to embody when I'm with my kids? I've already got the fun, playful thing taken care of, but, you know, how could I be more gentle with them?

And immediately I went to Mr. Rogers. You know, it's inarguable that the man is not prolific with children, right? And so then I just immediately, it takes eight seconds for all of us, especially if you've had an experience with that character that you would think about playing. I'm like, well, immediately, Mr. Rogers would get down on his knee because he always gets on eye level. And he definitely wouldn't meet force with force. He would probably go in for a hug or something like that. Anyway, that night, Sophie had a meltdown.

And I did exactly that. Now, inside, I'm like, because that voice just gets to me. But I just followed through. And in 50, she melted because I leaned in. I just grabbed her. I gave her a hug. And boom, she was done. 15 seconds, the meltdown was over.

And just like with any kid, 20 seconds later, she's off playing with her siblings and all things are fine. That's a perfect example of embodying the spirit of someone or something else to help you perform at a higher level, right? And anyone can use this because most likely you're dealing with ambitious achievers. And so it's not just limited to investing. They probably have other fields that they want to do well on, parenting or grandparenting or whatever the case might be, fitness and nutrition. Well, why not be a little bit more playful with ourselves? We already have this creative imagination and let's start tapping into it. I, by very nature, am a very serious person. And so for me, it helps prevent me from taking myself so seriously as well.

That's great. So Todd, you've been, I like how you said, you've been rolling around in the six inches between everybody's ears for the last two decades. Yeah. And you've got, you've kind of built this, not kind of, you've built this business around deploying this, I don't know, technology, I'd almost call it, right? What happens or what has happened in your career or what happened to create such demand for the book? Yeah. Because up until right now, I understood it, but I didn't understand it.

And you took me through a great journey there and really, I'm much more connected to it now. So the demand for it, why now? I think one thing is, it's a classic idea of, like, like investing. How does a lot of wealth get created? Well, a lot of people trying to go out into the ocean and create their own wave. Very frustrating. And that would be like someone who's like just marketing, marketing, marketing, trying to create demand, demand, demand, demand, demand. Well, when you take a look at the majority of the wealth that's ever been created by people, it's putting a surfboard in front of a wave that's already coming, right? And just carrying that

way forward. Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, you know, Larry Ellison, all those guys, you know, it's not that they were smarter than everyone else. They definitely deserve credit, but they were on the technology surfboard when the wave was building. So you'd have to be close to an idiot to not get wealthy, at least a little bit in that space. So right now it could be artificial intelligence, a wave that's building.

Well, right now with this book, I think it's just catching a wave that's been building around people getting really, really tired of a space, especially because of social media, there is this pervasive narrative and storytelling of people's highlight reels of their lives. And then if it's not that, then it's the very toxic side of the internet that goes along with it. And I think there's people that are caught in the middle and they're like, they can get caught up with the idea of looking bad to other people, judgment, criticism, worry, doubt, doubting themselves. And they, and they,

it's getting back to this place of like truly honoring, you know, who and what you want to bring out there and not be so concerned about what other people are thinking or your circumstance or your situation. And like you kind of said, it's, it is equated to more of a technology to go and use it. But it's tapping into something that it's not hard. It's people get this stuff. I don't know if you've seen the documentary on Mr. Rogers at all. Won't you be my neighbor? I've seen clips. I haven't seen that. It's, It's fascinating. It's really good. And I mean, probably 25% of that movie is dedicated to talking about Mr. Rogers's alter ego, Daniel Tiger. And his wife says it best. She said, you know, Daniel, and now Daniel Tiger is a, you know, a very popular cartoon for kids. And, and she said, you know, when he had that, when he had that puppet on, that was the most real Fred that you could find. That was really him because it was really bringing out that kind of gentle self. That's what she called it. in the documentary. And so this idea has been around forever. And all I'm doing is just picking up

all the breadcrumbs and just showing people that, no, this is actually something that's very natural. It's the most real self that you can bring to the table because nothing beats you up more than when you put your head on the pillow at night and you say, why didn't I say that? Why didn't I do that? Why didn't I actually take action and invest in the thing that Matt put in front of me at that event? when I know, you know, based on what I've seen of him, he can help me get to that next, that level. So there was some sort of self-doubt that that person had. Most people, I would say, because I've been around you for a very long time and I've seen your results that you get people. People aren't doubting you. Most people are doubting themselves because I've purchased other

things before and it didn't work out. So why is this one going to be different? Well, I can tell you why, because Matt focuses on implementation, not on teaching you stuff, right? So I think, it's such an accessible idea. I think people get it right away. And when I unpack it and I, because people go, yeah, I get how good that could work for Bo Jackson or Beyonce using Sasha Fierce, but those people are entertainers and athletes.

But how would that work for me as an investor? Well, that was why it's important that I kind of just shared just, you know, some of those ideas that people could tap into because it is. It's super accessible. Mm-hmm. I didn't know Daniel Tiger was related to Mr. Rogers. Yeah, that was his hand puppet that he used on the show.

That was his first hand puppet, I believe, that he brought out on the PBS show. That's great. Yeah, as you can tell my dad, because I know exactly who that was. What do you like best about what you do, Todd? Working with just very interesting people constantly and problem solving of it all.

I just love figuring it out. Now, there aren't that many different problems that I'm going to come across because everyone pretty much operates inside of the same ecosystem of, it could be past personal trauma that could be stopping someone it could be imposter syndrome it could be the hidden force of you know like i said before tribal narrative of you know well my family wasn't investors so why would i be an investor or you know no one from my town has ever made it to you know

the big leagues so why would i make like all those things are very insidious they sit below our unconscious and we sort of act through those things um but once i because i have the framework i just love you know, sort of weaving my way through and figuring out that problem and solving it because, you know, there's few things in life that can be more gratifying. And I think you'd agree. You've, you've seen the success stories for yourself of having someone just kick their life up to another level. It's, yeah, I mean, that's easily the most satisfying part of it. It's pretty remarkable, totally, when you get to be a part of that. Yeah. And you get acknowledged for it as well and it even feels better. Yeah. Yeah, that's, that's, I mean, I was asked at an event not too long ago,

how can you get around, you know, again, they're being nice, but they were like, how can I get around someone like you? Or how can I, you know, make, you talked about your, like, Rolodex and relationships and that being the ultimate superpower, which we can talk about in a second maybe with people, but, you know, how can I get around and just improve that Rolodex? And I said, one of the easiest things you can do is if you're someone who actually consumes information, a book even, or you go to a seminar or you buy an online programmer, or whatever the case is, loop around to that person and send them a note or an email or a short little video saying, you know, hey Matt, just want to let you know, I've actually been following a bunch of your social media posts. And just from those alone, this is what my life has turned into and like. If you want to get on someone's radar screen, Send people that because we have, I mean, some of us have thousands and thousands of clients around the world that we know we've helped. but, you know, people are busy and it's just natural. People are busy.

And then they forget to loop around. But if you want to get on someone's radar screen, which then turns into like, hey, would you mind if we gave you a call? I'd love to hop on the phone with you and figure out now all of us, now the ball starts rolling. That's exactly what I've done. You know, every day, the very first thing I do when I sit down at my desk right here is I write a handwritten note.

I ran a handwritten note and I've done it since I was 21. So I've written over 4,400 handwritten notes. Daniel DeLewis, he responded back. Philip Seymour Hoffman before he passed away, he responded back. Ronald Reagan, Nancy Reagan. I think the percentage is somewhere around 91% of all people I've sent a handwritten note to

has responded back. And again, I use a wax seal, you know, the classic old thing. I use a specific wax so that it doesn't break when it goes through the U.S. Postal Services, you know, machines and all that kind of stuff. But you know what the most common response back I get from people? Most common response back I've gotten from people.

people is this. And this goes from the top achievers all the way down to just some random person that I just really liked their book and I sent them a note. Same thing. You have no idea how much I needed to get this today. You know, life is hard for many people. Right? Like we're all sometimes just caught in the hard slog of stuff. And to have someone that sat down and write you just a simple handwritten note. It's not two pages. It's just one simple page, just expressing my gratitude for that person writing the book, creating the video, congratulating them on the award that they got or whatever it is or something that they did that, you know, has helped shape me, means so much to that person in that moment. And I think if we did more of that stuff, you're definitely going to open up doors

because I don't know about you, but easily, when I take a look at the slowest times in my life where I was growing or developing as a business or person, it was when I did not have mentors and coaches or good relationships around me. I was not pursuing and developing those more. Actually gave me chills, Todd. I needed to hear that today because I've been on both sides of that. Yeah. And so I get it.

The book, the alter ego effect. It's in stores online available everywhere. Books are sold February 5th. What's one action someone could take right now to start getting results with the alter ego. First thing, or there's, there's many things that we could do, but, um, I just want to get, leave something with something practical. Yeah, exactly. Use something to activate it. So I talked about the glasses. The glasses were something that I used to activate it. Use a totem and an artifact. Find something. And by the way, what you're doing is you're using something that we have

psychologically called enclosed cognition. We have this phenomenon in our mind where when the things that we wear changes our mental state. It's called in clothes. We give clothing meaning. And so there was a study, if you don't mind, I'll talk about this quick little study. Kellogg School of Management did this study on Enclothed Cognition. And they brought a bunch of students into a room and they got them to look at this puzzle on the wall. Have you ever seen those boxes where in each box is like the word of a color, but the color inside of the word is different than the color. So it's a yellow, but it's in green. And then blue is in red and brown is in pink. And what you have to do is you have to go across and say the word. And it's really hard

to do it because you see the color and you're like, okay, well, it's yellow is what I see, but it's green as the word. So anyways, I brought a bunch of students into a room. And it's a five by Fox, five by five grid, I think it was. And they just tested their accuracy and attention and the detail to see how quickly they could get through the puzzle without many mistakes and all that So they tracked all the data. That group leaves. Brings in it, bring in another group. This group, they hand them a painter's coat or hand them a white coat and they tell them it's a painter's coat.

And then they get them to do the thing. Great. Capture all the data. They leave. Next group comes in. And again, they're bringing in each person individually. And they hand them the same white coat as the previous group, except this time they tell them it's a lab coat and a doctor's coat.

And then they capture their data. So between the painter's group and the first group, just plain clothes, what do you think the difference was in their results. How quickly they could do it and the amount of mistakes that they made. Wow. I would imagine the painter's coat kept on saying the color and the lab coat kept on saying the words. Well, between the painter's coat and the plain clothes people, there was no difference whatsoever. Nothing. But when you get to the lab coat doctors. The lab coat, doctors coat people, they did it in half the time and they made less mistakes than everybody else. Why? Because when you're told that you're wearing a lab coat or a doctor's coat, you're in clothing yourself in the cognitive state of someone who's a doctor. Well, what is a doctor? Detail orientated, smart, you know, eye for detail, don't make mistakes because if they did, then surgeries would be in a lot of trouble with surgeries. Or lab, you know, their lab, you know, it's process. It's very careful, methodical, all that kind of stuff. And so just by putting on something new, it changed performance.

Well, me, who's rattling around inside the head, I'm not so concerned about the terms of authenticity or whatever. I care about whether or not you're getting a better result, right? And that has nothing to do with faking it to you're making it. I'm simply leveraging something that's already there. And so these glasses mean and meant smart, confident, articulate. And so when I put them on, I was enclosing myself in something new so that I could step into it. Same thing with other clients and customers. when we find that other totem, that artifact that they could put on, that they could wear, you know,

clients who use something that they were given from their grandma or their grandfather or whatever the case might be that allows them to, you know, indoctrinate themselves into that persona. If that helps you perform better, then all the power to you. So as a tool, take that thing away and think about stepping into that investor self when you get out there or parent or whatever the case might be. Yeah, reminds me of the Dion Sanders thing. if you look good you feel good you feel good you play good yeah good good they pay good i miss i miss him out on that field man i grew up with that dude so uh yeah anyway nice

super um yeah i guess i was going to ask if someone wanted to get in touch with you what would be the best way for them to do that and maybe it's just go get the book and i would love it if i could meet people into the in the pages of uh of the book itself but toddherman dot me is my home based on the internet so people can find me there. And alter ego effect.com, if people want to go learn a little bit more about the book, I've got some other videos for people there. And then, of course, there's links on my home base for across all the social media channels as well. Fantastic, Todd.

Well, congratulations. I hope this wave catches you. I don't think it could happen to a better person. I appreciate it, man. Thank you. And stay in touch. I'll actually see you probably next month. Worst case.

I will see you next month. All right, buddy. See you. Take care. Bye. All righty. So that's it for today's episode of Thought Leader Thursday. I'll see you next week on another episode of Thought Leader Thursday right here on the epic real estate investing show. Take care. This podcast is a part of the C Suite Radio Network. For more top business podcasts, visit c-sweetradio.com.