Erin is the Funny One - The Sequel

Episode Date: January 11, 2026

After a long 3-year hiatus, your favorite wine-reviewers and horoscope-tellers return! Erin and Jack try desperately to catch up on all the fads, news events, and milestones they missed since their last episode from June 2022. They do not succeed. Then, Jack makes Erin take his worst quiz yet (according to her) - is it a Panic! at the Disco song, a Fall Out Boy song, or a Robert Frost poem? Finally, Erin gives all you Geminis some hard truths in this week's horoscope reading - even if she has some trouble starting. Welcome back, haters!! Follow Erin and Jack on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/2toesup/?hl=enhttps://www.instagram.com/jacksfilms/?hl=en To watch Erin Is The Funny One on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@jackisanerd Don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: https://bit.ly/erinisthefunnyone Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Oh my gosh, welcome back, dear listeners. It has been a long time. But finally, Aaron is the funny one, is back. I am your main host, Jack Douglas, joining me very kindly as my co-host, Aaron. More than kindly, I would say. This was a three-year-long bribe. I would say that finally you were able to meet my terms. And I finally agreed to make one limited appearance.

Just this one episode. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, this is a special. Just so everyone understands. Just this one. I am still alive. And then that's all you're going to get for me. We're still going to keep it.

Aaron is the funny one. And we won't have a guess. It'll just be me talking. I think that's a show. I promised I wouldn't laugh the entire episode. I said, but no laughing. That's my only, my only condition. I'll take about 45 seconds.

That was pretty sick. I can't believe it. Three years. I, you know, first off, a cheers, honey. We're drinking a little, uh, sparkling wine. This is a celebratory, special, fancy sparkling wine. We've been saving up for three years for this. We've been saving up for three years.

This is Vuvclico. They're blue. I don't know, guys. But it was expensive. And it's fancy and it's definitely trendy. And we just wanted to celebrate our comeback. Yeah. Or at least Jack's comeback since I won't be here after this.

Right. Right. Yeah. Unless we not forget. Hey, a cheers, hon. The most unenthusiastic like clink of all time. Yeah. Can we try again here?

No, because I think it's the. Oh, is it bad luck. No, I think it's, it is bad luck to cheers without drinking. And we did not drink. All right. Look at me. But I don't think there will be a better one. It's whatever material these glasses are, which I think are like supposed to be like durable

and not like, I mean, I think it's just, you're just. No, it's not very clunky and not glassy. I think you're just going to get a clunk. Yeah. Very anticlimactic. But yeah, three years in the making, we took a nice long little hiatus. And to whoever bought these from our wedding registry. Do glasses.

Thank you. Because we just celebrated seven years together. married. Yeah, I know. Seven year itch. I think that's a thing. I think we're supposed to like... What does that even mean the seven year it? I don't know. I never watched the movie, but I think we're supposed to cheat on each other or something. Oh, is that it? Shit.

Go, go, go, go, go. Hold on. Am I going to like manifest that now? Oh my gosh. Your Honor. Guys, put it on the record. Put it on the record. Put it on the record. This is it. For the divorce attorneys. Your honor, a movie told us that we could. So, honey, it's been so gall dang long since our last podcast that I actually made a list of all of the things that have

transpired in history since June of 2022. Do you know the exact date of our last episode? I don't know the exact date. I'm sure it's easy to pull up. But June of 2022 was when we hung up the mics last. There's been, by the way, not only obvi, stuff that happened in the universe, obviously, But like we've had a lot personally go on as well. I freaking agree. And I may have included some of those as well. Oh, okay. Okay, okay.

So first off. Are we going to go in sequential order? I think, yes. But hold on first. I have categories. Oh, I love categories. That's my favorite like Kings Cup game. Keep smiling, baby.

It's time for the top celebrity deaths that happened since June of 2022. Oh, boy. Okay. Will I care about some of them? Yes. Okay. Aaron Carter. He followed me on Twitter when it was still Twitter.

Well, he did. I didn't know that. He did. Oh, no, I didn't know that. I think he was a thing that he did. Sure. Did he follow like 100,000 people? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But I was one of those lucky 100,000. At one point. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. We're still on Aaron. We're not done with Aaron. At one point, I also subscribed to his only fans. Okay.

Jeez, he don't have to say. Well, I'm, you know, I was a supporter and an enabler. But Jesus Christ. I have not watched the latest. Apparently there's, because I follow our Backstreet Boys. And apparently a lot of the diehard Backstreet Boys fans are big fans of the latest The Carter's documentary, I guess. And I'll be honest, I don't know what streaming platform it's on. But it's in the back of my mind to like watch at some point.

But I think it does go into, I mean, the Carter family. And we're going to put aside the allegations against Nick at this point in time. But Aaron Carter was a twin with his sister, Angel. I am pretty sure. And then Nick was the second oldest, I think. And then they had a sister, BJ and Leslie and Leslie both died as well. Right. Yeah.

So out of like five kids and guys, I'm totally butchering this. Like, Kai, let's fact check it, maybe sort of. But out of five kids, I'm pretty sure three of them died in young adulthood, which is just so tragic. So I'm not okay that you brought that up. I can't believe you would start our like new entry into this like. With celebrity deaths. With celebrity deaths. And one that particularly was hurtful to me.

Forget about making this about the celebrity. Let's make it about me. Okay. Oh my God. Well, it was a podcast like Aaron is the funny one. It's hard not to. Okay, fuck you. You made that name.

What? I don't know about Bob Barker. I have very fond memories of watching. While home sick? Home sick. And during the summer, if I woke up in time to watch it at 11 a.m. I'm not kidding. The early bright time of 11 a.m.

I am not kidding. I am. Well, my parents. My parents have always called me, like literally from when I was like a baby baby. I always had bartender hours, which meant I stay up really late, but that I am a good sleeper. I will sleep until three in the afternoon if you let me. So anyway. Very true.

Love that Bob Barker. I think he lived a generous, by generous, I mean, I know he was a big proponent for spaying your animals. Sure was. And neutering your animals. I don't know much else about him except maybe he was in Happy Gilmore. And that he lived to a very ripe, generous age. So I think he got a full life out of this, of the damn thing. I would absolutely agree.

I love that. You said you think he's in Happy Gilmore when it's like probably aside from the Price is Right, his most famous role. Yeah. I appreciate that. Yeah, you're welcome. And that was it. Those are the only people that died.

moving on to um wait are you for real no i have many many more how many more i don't care but i like ray leota you're great dame maggie smith oh professor maconico that's the one yeah that was great she was but like let's be real so when she was in hook she was old when she was young she was she was she was she was in hook yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah she was old when she was young she really was i mean we love her but she was like 70 for 40 years for 40 years kind of like like Morgan freeman just like always an old person for like most of their life i mean i don't know if I agree with that. I think Morgan Freeman is actually still young. Like he's, he's always been young or a middle age. No one's going to agree with you on that. No one's going to agree with you.

Well, they don't agree with you and your face. So it's fine. Good one. No one's going to be like, wow, I agree with Aaron. That's true. He doesn't look that old. He's looked 80 for 40 years. No, he's looked 50 for 40 years. Not true. Maggie Smith has looked 70 for 40 years. That is true. And we do love her, though. She's amazing and wonderful and iconic. And Icony. and I have concerns over this new reboot that they're doing because I just, guys, I just, I don't know that we're able to get it right or don't do it at all. Yeah, I just, I don't know that we're going to be able to remaster perfection as far as Dame Maggie Smith goes.

Downton Abbey, she was perfection in that. Oh, right? She was the only reason worth watching for those later seasons. Oh. You know? You cried when she died in the movie. Spoiler. What?

Shut up. No, I didn't. Yeah. Doesn't sound like me at all. Anyways. Who else? Who else? Your favorite David Lynch?

You loved his work. I don't know anything. I saw that one movie. We watched Mulholland Drive together years ago. And I said that this movie made no sense to me. All the sense in the world. Clear is day. I loved spooky movies.

I love it. Couldn't tell you a damn thing about that movie, except I had no idea what was going on most of the time. Did I? Did I ever tell you that like during one of his many interviews, someone asked David Lynch, like, what the fuck happened? Explain, can, like, explain Mulholland Drive to us? And he said, no. Wait, really?

Yeah. Because it didn't make any say, even he didn't have answers. I just, I kind of, I have to respect. Did he do gone girl though? Did he do Gone Girl? Who was the guy who did Gone Girl? Not David Lynch. Who did Gone Girl?

Didn't Affleck? You gone girl or? Well, no. There was a guy who had like a very specific like aesthetic. Yes. No, Fincher. I think that's Fincher. Oh.

Not Lynch. Is his name David too? I think so. Okay. Yeah. Yes. Yes, it is. I'm sure people listening are like, oh my fucking God.

Like, yes, it is. Sorry. I think it's anyways. Guys, I'm going to be honest. I'm very sorry for the loss, but I cannot appreciate it. I'm so sorry. It's lost. It's lost on me.

The loss is lost. And acknowledging that is just personal growth. So thank you for that. Is it? Sure. It's a shortcoming. I don't know. Last one I'll say on my list.

Wait, who else is on the list? So many people. Who else? Like Matthew Perry. Okay, guys. Oh no. That's a Matthew Perry story. Guys.

I'm going to plug another podcast right now. I actually haven't listened to podcasts in way too long of a time. I have been busy girl bossing. And so really in my free time, All I do is sleep. So, but I will say, Celebrity Memoir Book Club did an episode on Matthew Perry's

autobiography or memoir, whatever you want to call it. It was tragic, but flawed, as most of us are. So anyway. That's a good podcast, though. Tune in. If you, yeah, tune in to that episode, if you want to know. I have so many more people who died.

I'll try to wrap it up. Michelle Trachenberg. Tractonburg. Jesus Christ. That's what I said. Trachenberg. Machanic. Did you go to the car machinic?

I was literally talking about my favorite TikToker, Sam, today. If you look it up, it's really funny. But Sam, Sam says, um, the car machinic. It's a good bit. It's a good bit. But it's not a bit. It's real. Michelle Trackenberg.

Tractenberg. Tractenberg. Christ. Wait, Tractenberg? Did I forget a tea? Oh my. God. Yeah, you must have. I can't see your list. But this is embarrassing. As you can tell him, I was a huge fan. But I did like Harriet the Spy. I also liked Harriet the Spy. Every time I see

a dumb waiter, I think of the movie Harriet the Spy. Oh, that's fun. Also, Nickelodeon used to make their VHS tapes orange. Yep. That was cool. Sure did. Sure did. Another iconic move from Nickelodeon. What else was she in? She was in. Oh, Buffy. We know. We never watched that far in Buffy. Oh, I did. You did. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck you.

All right. Okay. I had a whole life before you. Those vampires were too spooky. I stopped after season one. And she was in Gossip Girl. Right. She played Georgina.

Right, right. Classic Georgina. She was an icon and may she rest. So some of the major celebrity deaths that we missed. Jack is really, he's just like an optimist at heart. So he really wanted to this. kick this off strong with let's talk about death. That's me. Even though he knows literally, like one of my biggest fears is people in my life that I love dying. So I appreciate this.

That's awesome. No, this is called facing your fears. So you're welcome. This is definitely nothing to do with the like why we stopped doing this in general. Wasn't because, you know, maybe I didn't want to talk about what you wanted to talk about or anything like that. Well, then let's lighten the mood because I do want to talk to you about all the biggest fads and trends that we missed. Did we miss them? No, I mean the podcast. We couldn't talk about the death of the queen, for example. Okay.

That's the last death thing. I'm sure. I swear. So was that in your death pile or was that in your trend pile? That was in my trend pile. Wow. What does that say about you? That's so gross that you've dehumanized the queen.

You know what? I apologize. The queen didn't deserve. We've been to her house and you still don't view her as a human. And we were at her house when she was still alive and breathing. Wow. You're starting to make me feel really uncomfy and this is a safe zone. Okay.

So hold on. Why did you put QE2 in the trend pile and not the death pile? I'll be honest. I don't know because I wrote this so long ago. I don't recall. How long ago did you write in? I do not recall. I'm pleading the fifth.

I think like two months ago. Okay. And I don't remember why I put her in that pile and not the other pile. Yeah. I put it on, Barbenheimer, you know, that came and went,

quiet quitting, just the trend of quiet quitting. Okay, so I actually, okay, a few things. Uh-huh. You're speed running.

I know, but I have a dozen. We need to slow down. We have a lot to catch up on. We really do. I know. Can you just take it down a notch? Okay.

I've got thoughts on all of these. things? Well, then let her let them rip the thoughts. Welcome aboard via rail. Please sit and enjoy. Please sit and sit. Play. Post. Taste. View and enjoy. Via rail. Love the way. Okay. So QE2. All I can think about is that she too died in her 90s. she like the day before she passed away she was like still meeting with people or and I'm I'm probably fudging the details here so like bear with me but like she was not ill she was not unwell she did not

have a long drawn out like death it was it was pretty sudden in that hey I'm not feeling great I'm gonna go lie down forever um there was like a picture of her like the day before shaking hands This is what I'm talking about. But I'm like, I don't know if like maybe my memory was exaggerated, but that's exactly what I was thinking of. She was like, she was like, shaking hands with somebody. Literally the day before she passed. And then a day later, she was like, I'm tired. Like standing in everything.

Right. Bye. I think that's how it happened. Listen, I've never seen the crown. Listen. I saw the first episode of the crown. Uh-huh. And you're like, I need subtitles.

I was, I know. The subtitles were on already. Please. But what? What? What? What? I don't know enough about history.

Right. So then I felt like I had to do research to appreciate the show. And then it became this huge, like, emotional undertaking that I was just like, this feels like work now. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know these characters. I don't know all the influences. I don't know. And so I was like, it felt like too.

I get it. I get it. I just like didn't know enough that I was like, I'd rather just not watch it all. Yeah. I don't have an appreciation for it. But what I will say is this. I think she, from what I understand, came into her role suddenly and at a very young age. And I think people respect her for what she did during a really, like, fucked up hard time.

Okay. Okay. I think. I think that those people exist. Sure. Do I agree with what the monarchy stands for? I don't fucking know. I don't fucking know enough about it except probably not.

I'm not a Brit and I don't know enough about it. So I can't have a position except I think people respected her for what she did at a very young age in a very sudden, suddenly placed upon her position. Right, right. But I also think she led a very privileged yet burdensome yet mostly privileged life. And she got to live a very full life where she and her husband died at really ripe old ages. So QE2, may she rest. Don't know why you put it as a trend.

I feel like that's fucked up of you. That feels weird. But we're going to digress because we already know that you're a fucked up human being. So who was the other? What was the other one? Barbenheimer. Yeah. I never saw Oppenheimer.

Sorry guys. I never did well in science class. And like literally. I like had to take one of those standardized tests as like a seventh or second grader. No, I think it was like honestly seventh or tenth grade or something. And I did piss poor where it literally said like in the summarized results, there were no strengths found in the area of science. Yikes.

I am bad at science, which is weird because I'm actually really good at math. That is weird because the two are very, you know, related. It's weird. I'm very good at math, not very good at science. I don't know what that says about me, except hearing the story about somebody who created like a nuclear bomb, I'm good.

So. Now that's ignorant. That's rude. Say what you will about the monarchy, but you put some respect. Also, Barbie, don't give a shit. Yeah, you hate a Barbie. I don't know where or when I've said this,

but I feel like I've put it on a platform somewhere. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I did not care for the Barbie movie. I thought it was so overhyped. Aaron ran out of the fucking theater when the credits rolled. I swear, she was like so eager to get out of the movie theater. Meanwhile, I'm giggling. I'm kicking my feet.

I'm like, this is funny. Ha, ha, yay. No. And Aaron was like, I'm, I've never been this mad before. I'm so mad because this was supposed to be some like feminist iconic. Yeah, yeah. Like, you didn't see it that way. Tribute or whatever.

No, of course. I will never understand how or why somebody would see it. that way. Right. Because one, you making Will Ferrell and a bunch of other white men, the heads of Mattel. Board of Mattel is not funny because, guys,

all of this information is public for publicly traded companies. If you go on SEC.gov, click on Edgar. Search company filings. Look for the annual reports and proxy reports of companies. Mattel is one of them. them. It will literally describe and show pictures of and the ages of and the salaries of all of the people on their board. It was barely a joke. I want to say, let, I'm exaggerating, but maybe 10 of 12 or white men, okay? I love that you instructed them to a website. Guys, because knowledge is what?

Power. That's right. And what are women? Trash. Powerful. That's right, Jack. Educate yourselves. S-E-C-D-G before Trump takes it down, okay? Before Trump realizes transparency makes us too powerful and it needs to be taken down. S-E-C-D-Gov that stands for the Securities and Exchange Commission.

Dot-gov. Look for Edgar. Search filings. Look up Mattel. M-A-T-E-L. This is not funny. It's not funny because it's fucking real. And by the way,

even the funny stuff wasn't funny. Just because you make it pink and like fluorescent and cute does not make it funny. So no, yeah, fuck Barbie, fuck the Barbie movie. Did not live up to the hype in my mind. Do not understand it. The only thing that makes sense to me about how so many people like the Barbie movie is it explains exactly why we have an idiot in power. Sorry, I don't mean to make this political, but oops. Make it political.

But it explains, speak your frigging mind. It explains how 50% of people. voted for Trump because people are not smart. Educate yourselves. Because knowledge is what? Smart. Knowledge is so smart. I'm going to force so many awful catchphrases and modos now.

So here's, okay, here's the deal. Because I have so many fads and trends, we're not going to get through all of them tonight here in this opening segment. Why not? Let's make this an eight-hour episode. We could make it an eight-hour episode. They've been wait. The people have been waiting.

I was going to say we could like, what if this were a thing that we kept coming back to at the start of new episodes like you know what I mean like what I mean like what else did we miss oh we missed this you know we could but at a certain point I don't know yeah yeah I'll throw a few more your way quiet quitting what do you think about quiet quitting what do I think about quiet quitting is that's a really impossible do you judge people who quiet quit no are you judgmental how judgmental I'm extremely judgmental but not when it comes to quiet quitting because I can't fucking relate. Yeah.

I'm a stupid, simple YouTuber. Mostly simple. And I appreciate that. Thank you. Thank you for going for simple before stupid. That's a win in my book, baby. Fuck. And that's on you, bitch.

Anyways, I am the last person on earth to be asked about quiet quitting. Because I can't relate. I, you know, I can't be like, well, no, no, I don't know. I think the employer-employee relationship, like, who am I the fucking say? I don't see a problem with it. Like, because like what is like quiet quitting, as we've defined is you're still doing your job. It's just you're not doing a great job, but you're doing a job, period. Like, like, not to the best for your ability, but just simply by acting out your title, acting out your job description, you know, to the point where like, quiet quitting, like they still, like, you're not, you don't get fired.

Like you still have to like you are quit yourself. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah. So it's not like you're working so shittily that the employer is forced to. No. No, no, no.

It's like I am doing the bare minimum. Bare minimum. To not get fired. Why would I be against that? But also like, but I'm at the same time. I'm one foot out the door. Yes. Why would I be against that?

Like I'll tell you this, my childhood, our childhood, our generation's childhood. And many, many decades before that, we were always taught like, when you perform a job, do the best job you possibly can. You know, like give 110%. Don't just do what's expected of you. Do better and do more. And more and more and more presently, you know, we're being taught why. What?

Yeah. What's in it for you? Yeah. If you give 110%. You're just a cog and a big ass machine. So no, I, I'm very for quiet quitting if it's, if and when it's applicable. Yeah, I'm a fan of it if it's, you know, when it makes sense. Isn't that sad?

Sorry, this is Aaron, emotional Aaron coming out. I just. It's what four glasses of wine will do. I know. I just, I'm like, it's so sad. Like that organizations do treat people transactionally. Sure. When they literally buy homes so that they're close to an office that they work at.

Like, they design their lives around these organizations and corporations that they work for. They dedicate so much time into, you know what I mean? And then they're like, oops, sorry. Yeah. Give, give, give, give. Here's your 2%. It's anyway. All right. Let's move on. Like, yeah, sad Aaron is like, it's just so sad. And I feel like part of me would love to go back to the 50s as a white man to see if organizations treated men better. Obviously, I wouldn't want to go back as myself because I'd probably be put in as like a mailroom attendant or like a shoe shiner or something that. No, you'd be a housewife.

Or wouldn't employ me at all. Yeah. But whatever I would be doing would be subservient to men. Right. The men around me, even if I were better at what they were doing than they were. Because by the way, I work with a lot of men that are not great at what they do. That does it say, I also work with a lot of men that are great at what they do. Just saying.

Can I say? I agree with you wholeheartedly on that. It's just like what you just said was very Trumpy. By the way, I work with a lot of men not very good at what they do. You have become what you've hated. But I know, but I also, but then I say I, but I work with a lot of men that are good at what they do. Oh, you fixed it.

You know what? I'm just saying that just because you're a man does not mean you're good at what you do. Anyway. And as a woman. I think about like there's this, these glory days in my mind of like when people could afford houses. Sure, sure.

And when people actually made wages that were enough to raise a family as opposed to having the woman work and the man work. And like now having a dual income. Like I would like to just time machine, not actually experience it, but I just want to like maybe be a ghost that like follows it around to see like how things

actually operated then. I don't know. I don't know. Maybe it was like totally the same where people were just treated like transactional or whatever. I don't know. I just, I'm curious. Once we crack time travel, that will be a one of these days. You know, for sure. Okay. So I was telling Jack the other day. Oh God. Where's this going? Okay. Do you guys, okay. Do you guys remember? I may have talked about it. I may have talked about it on the podcast before. But do you guys remember there was. some like famous lore story about the man from panjectia or whatever the fuck like he was from like this like fucking made up country and it and I'm again I'm butchering the details here okay but he was like a dude who showed up at like the Tokyo airport or something and he was

was was like shows his passport and he's from a country that like does not exist. And they're like, sir, this country doesn't exist. And he's like, what are you talking about? This is a country that totally exists. I'm from there. And then they're like, put him in a hotel room or something. They like, you know, question him for a bunch of hours. And they like put him in a hotel room because they're like, this guy, we don't know what to do with this man. He's like, but they're like, he's a time travel or whatever the fuck. I don't know. And then they open the door to get him and he's gone. The man is from Pangexia. whatever the fuck has disappeared.

It was not until, I swear to God, I think about this story. This is one of those like, what's your Roman Empire? I'm just literally on my list. I swear to God. Wait, really? Yes. The list of the man from Pangexia? No, no, no, no.

After quiet quitting is how often do you think about the Roman Empire as a trend we missed from our absence? It's the next thing. No lie. This story is my Roman Empire. It really is. I think about it often. I think about it like could that have been a real story?

Was that a real story? Listeners, please let us know if you know what Aaron is, if you know what we're talking about. Like somebody has to know. Yeah. And by the way, don't try to search the country, Panjectsia. It's not the country. I don't know. When you told me the story it was Pan Gea yesterday.

Yeah, exactly. So it changes every time you talk about it. I think about it all the time. Okay. And it was not until this week that I thought to myself. Because I, in my mind, I thought, that could never happen because the world is so stable. Listeners, if only you could have seen just how cocky she looked, moving her shoulders.

Like, that would never happen. That would never happen. Right. Not to us. Exactly the same way. I was like, there can't be a pandemic. Right. Like we have vaccines for everything.

Oh, my God. Okay. February of 2020. There are no unknown diseases at this point. That's right. Anyway, um, girl be wrong. But also, girl be seeing stuff in 2025 that she has never seen before. And I'm finally at the point where, you know what? That story maybe did happen because just because there's a country that we've never heard of doesn't mean that it won't be a country in the future. I don't know. I don't know, guys. I'm sure there's a Reddit thread that you and I need to like look into where someone asks that exact question. Like, do you guys ever hear about the guy from Panjectia? And it's a thousand comments deep with like 20 different conspiracies. Like we need to look into this more because I have like before you even told me about this, I am familiar with this exact story.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. Was it, wait, in your memory, was it, was it was the Tokyo airport? It was, it was in Japan. Okay. Yes. That's real. Okay.

All right. All right. So like I know you're not just pulling this out your ass. This is a, this is not an Aaron original. This is a real ass story. What are the memories of the story that you remember that I didn't. not remember. I think he had a passport that had like a territory that like just doesn't exist. You know what I mean? Like a stamp from a place that isn't from here. Yeah. Some insignia that's

not recognizable. Was there ever a date that was given? Did he say that? No, I don't remember a date. Okay. Not to say there wasn't one. I just don't remember it. Okay. But detail. It's been years since I've read this probably on Reddit. I don't fucking know. But like, you know, like the guy with the lamp story. Remember the lamp Oh, the lamb story. Well, the lamp story is famous. That's been like referenced in so many things. Another thing I see on Reddit, there's like a subreddit that talks about like, I don't understand the joke.

Like the subreddit is all like, can you guys explain the joke? I don't get the joke. And someone screencapped like a picture of a lamp and like a novel. And they're like, I don't get it. And someone was like, oh, you have to know the lamp story. Yeah, yeah, okay. Okay. I think about panjectia more than I think about the lamp.

That's not a thing. That's for sure. Listeners, Google Lamp Story. I don't think we have time to cover LAMP story today. Well, how are they going to Google Pangexia? Google, time traveler, airport, passport. Maybe. Hopefully.

We have so many stories to discuss. Okay. So here's a deal. Here's what I want to do. Okay. Moving forward. Okay. In the segment where we catch up on trends and things we've missed since our last

podcast of June of 2022. Yeah. I think this becomes a recurring bit for future episodes where we cover just more things that we miss. Like, oh, remember this? What happens when we run out? Then we can finally talk about relevant news stories and not shit that happened three years ago.

Okay. Okay. That's fair. You know, and there's so much, there's so much more. Like, we didn't even talk about Luigi and there's so much more. And we're not going to. I'm pointing at her right now. don't see it. I don't have much to say about Luigi. Well, well, good. Then save what you don't

have much to say about him. Except that men are trash. And the only reason that he got caught was because he was fucking hitting on a woman because men need to be fucking de-ballified, whatever. When you open with men are trash about Luigi? Why are the penises always fucking directing brain movement. A lot of people are, a lot of listeners are going to think like, oh my gosh, she's against Luigi. No. I'm against men.

It's just, I think it's going to get lost in translation. And that's fine. That's fine. I don't care. Honey, I have been sitting on this next bit for months, if not like half a year. I think I wrote this like over a year ago. We have been talking about this podcast coming back. Yeah.

Since we ended it. Yeah, yeah, since 2022. And this next segment I've had completed. Like, I don't even remember any of any, okay, let me just hear on Aaron is the funny one. Yes. We, listeners, you'll know this. We often have a fun quiz or just a segment, just like the meat of the podcast, the meat of the episode is something, you know, that we're either quizzing each other on or it's a challenge, something fun like that. And I thought of a really devious one. I think I wrote the perfect quiz for you. I doubt it. Either, okay, this is what I don't believe. I don't believe that you wrote it.

Really? Okay. Because you have people that do things for you all the time now. I do have a wonderful team. This is a Jack film original. Okay. Then if you wrote it yourself, I don't believe that it's the perfect quiz.

Okay. Let's put this to the test. I love your confidence. love your, it just, it makes me more confident. Like, let's fucking go. You suck, you suck, you suck. In the spirit, in the spirit of Aaron is the funny one. Yes.

And the quizzes we've done with it. One of my favorite formats of quizzes we do is, I say, Aaron, is this thing a blank or a blank. Examples are, is this a red hot chili pepper song or a Tony Hawk's pro skater skateboarding trick? I love those quizzes. They're so goofy and they're so, is this an Alex Jones quote or an onion article headline, right? I got something for you. Okay.

Okay. It better be something I care about, okay? Yeah. We'll see. For the, for the return episode, it better be something I care about and not something that makes me upset and angry at you because it's something I don't care so deeply about. Or I so deeply don't. care about. Fair. Okay. Noted. You've been heard. You're so heard. Oh, am I okay. Okay.

Aaron. Yes. I am going to read out something. You have to tell me if this something is a song from Panic at the disco. Oh, no. I'm really not. I have not been a good fan. I have not been a good fan. Or a song from Fallout Boy. Oh. Or a poem written by Robert Frost. Oh. Jesus. Hold on a second.

Yeah. Why do you think this is the perfect quiz? Because it's pretty niche. You love panic though. Or you loved panic. Exactly. I'm like, I really couldn't tell you a whole. lot past 2013? Oh, you'll be fine. This will be fine. You'll do great. Look. Oh, Christ. I got some

warm up questions for you. Wait, did you know? I'm pretty sure that what's his name? Oh, my God. Brandon, Brendan, Yuri. Yeah. I'm pretty sure he is retired now. He's like my age and he's retired. How fun would that be? Being retired. We drove past a house like in the vicinity earlier today and they were having a child's birthday party. And when I tell you this house is no less than $5 million, I was so mad. I was like, oh, I think it's more than that. Who are these? You think so? Yeah, it's huge. It is huge. But I was like, who are these people that are my age and able to have children? No, it's very. That are able to afford a house like this. It's very envy inducing. Like, it just both, it made us both like worse people. So got some warm up questions. And just a refresher, your options are,

fallout boy song Panic of the Disco song Robert Frost poem okay I really need you to focus up Oh Christ okay All right Okay

Give me some Give me some easy How many questions are there? I like 40 It's really quick No no How many? It's like 20

And we don't have to do all of them Because it's so many But I wanted to make sure I was like prepared Guys I know I said I wasn't good at science But I wasn't that good at English either So I'm better at English now that I have to write emails all day every day. But like I was...

You are a very good writer. But I'm email writer. You have to be a good writer to write good emails. You're really good at using chat GPT to like make those emails shine. What the fuck are you talking about? You're so mean to me. It's funny to be mean to you. A man diminishing a woman's talent.

And listeners, can I just say, Aaron has trained me. sucks, by the way. I hate admitting this. Aaron has trained me over the years. Like, fill in the blank, Jack, men are what? And I go, trash. That's right. Men are trash. I was at a work dinner. It was like a casual work dinner and then I was with two like girlfriend, co-workers the other day. And I call up Jack and I put him on speaker and he goes, hello? And I go, men are. And he goes, trash. Because she's trained me, dude. That was all.

Thank you. I just wanted to tell my coworkers that you know what's up. All right. Bye. Balls ripped right from me every single time. They were very impressed. Oh, good. Good.

I'm glad I impressed your work. It's all about the trainability. All right, honey. Your first warm up question. Okay. The only difference between martyrdom and suicide is press coverage. That's fallout boy. That's panic at the disco.

Wait, are these song titles? Yes. Really? Yes. Oh. Oh, no. It was too long to be a panic song. I thought panic songs were always that long.

No, they're like, build God, then we'll talk. Yeah, that is one. Oh, do you have that on your quiz? No, it's not because that's too easy. I knew you would get that. I'm looking through it. I'm like, uh, nope. Or, uh, well, I guess the most fun a girl can have without,

out lying is taking her clothes up. Right. That's that's panic right. Yeah. Okay. Okay. All right. All right. That's fair. That's fair. Okay. Which by the way, I'm pretty sure is a quote that they stole. They and steal. They took. They. From a Woody Allen movie. No. No. From fucking closer or closer. I don't know. But the Natalie Portman, Jude Law. Clive Owen and Julia Roberts movie. The most, when Julie or when Natalie Portman is playing a stripper. I think that's a Woody Allen quote though. Really? I think so.

Wait, really? I think it might be Annie Hall. I'm not entirely sure. Oh, I've never seen Annie Hall. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Fuck you. Next one.

Fuck you. Hey, hey, honey, on the heart's beginning to cloud the mind. Oh, that's Robert Frost. It doesn't make any sense. It is Robert Frost. Yeah. Good for you. Robert Frost, I hardly knew thee.

I will never know the likely. And sorry, bro. Sorry, bro. From what I do know, these speaks wildly. And that's some Robert Frost shit right there. And that has made all the difference, right? All you frost heads out there are foaming at the mouth right now. All right.

And finally, honey, for the end of the warm up. The pros and... Oh, this is still the warm up. That's right. Yeah, yeah. Fuck. Okay. The pros and cons of breathing.

I'll give you a hint. We've done panic. And we've done Frost. Is it Fall Out Boy? It's Fall Out Boy. What do you think the pros and cons of breathing are? I think there are quite a few. The pros are like you need to keep breathing.

The cons are sometimes it's hard. Hey, honey. Yeah. Speaking of Robert Frost, is this a... Panic, fall a boy or frostism. I constantly thank God for Esteban. That is a panic. It is a panic.

That is a panic. Do you know that one? I do. I know that song very well. Look at that. I don't know who Esteban is, but I know that anybody that was named Stephen in my high school Spanish class,

their Spanish name was Esteban. Oh, fun. Yes. Oh, okay. Next one. From a mountain in the middle of the cabins. from a mountain in the middle of the cabins. This is Robert Frost.

This is panic. Really? I thought you were a fan. No, I told, I was. So, yeah, what year, 2012, 11? 2013, maybe. Okay. I do remember now, you know what, they had that?

Your eyes are the size of the moon. Yeah, nine in the afternoon. I don't know that I knew that whole album, like, at all. I was very concentrated on. graduating college at that time. Nerd alert. Yeah. So, shit.

Sorry, Brendan, even though he's retired. Yeah, yeah, he's fine. Sorry, Robert, may he rest? You don't know. He could still be alive. Robert Frost?

Yeah. He could still be kicking it. Pretty sure he's dead. Robert Frost, if you're, like, still around, like, please call in. We would love for you to recite your poetry. Do you think he ever did, like, readings at Barnes & Noble?

Oh, I hope so. I hope so. Can you imagine just him with like his own book? I'm like honestly I'm like imagining like Harry. No, I'm imagining like Carrie Broadshaw and that's when I saw Mr. Bing. Next up, Robert Frost. Yes.

And he's just this like like two roads that version of yellow wood and what? Where'd everyone go? What do you think Robert Frost look like? I'm imagining like a bald man. Okay. That like hasn't seen daylight in. Like if you were to take a shrew, but make it a man. Funny. Okay.

Yeah. And wildernessy. Like definitely. Wildernessy is that we said? Lives in not Montana, but Wyoming. Thanks for the distinction. Yes. But not like Jackson Hole, Wyoming.

Like Wyoming. Oh no, no, no. No, no. That's too posh for Mr. Frost. Okay. Like it's a four hour drive to the closest airport. Fast. Yeah, I can see that.

No, certainly like wildernessy for sure. Not bald though. He has some, he has some hair. He's a bit unkempt. He's got a mustache that goes out to here. Oh, okay. For sure. Okay.

And a bit of like Ernest Hemingway. Like he'll correct you about life kind of thing. Yeah. Is he pompous? I view him as humble. Darn it. I think he's humbled too. I have to think about that.

I think he's humble. Given the one poem I know from him. Soft spoken and humble. I don't, I don't think he's pretentious. Yeah. Okay. All right.

So I guess he wouldn't lecture you on, you know, manhood and shit. No, that's not how I view him. Okay. Yeah, that's fair. But a mustache for sure, for sure. I think he died in his sleep. He died while we were like taking breaks. He was one of the celebrities.

Under a flannel blanket. Okay, yeah. And like when he went to the afterlife, he and. Kate Winslet. Rose do it be cannon. They met in the afterlife. That's what I said. If you haven't seen the movie Titanic, you haven't seen the movie Titanic, you

won't understand it. Yeah. Aaron knows that theme. Like, not the fucking Celine Dion, like, no. The theme, like this. This is very specific to like the opening of Titanic. And they play it throughout. But like, she, she's very proud of this, by the way.

I wonder if this will get us like copy written. Copy. I wonder if we'll be flagged because it's so accurate. If anything, if we get flagged for this, that's a compliment to your singing ability. Because it's so spot the fuck on. Yeah. Right. It's haunting.

It is haunting. But also melancholic yet longing. It's a beautiful tune. It's still James Cameron's best movie. If you haven't seen the movie Titanic, fucking watch it. It's fucking masterpiece. If you haven't seen Titanic, what is wrong with you? Stop.

Like, don't watch Avatar's 1 and 2. Watch Titanic 1 and 2. Well, to be fair, it used to come on 2. It came to VHS tapes. It sure did. Yeah. We have that sit in my parents house somewhere. Just a big old block of, you know, please turn to tape 2.

Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow, another rich kid. Shut the fuck up. Rich kid. You're so mean bullying me for my privilege. All right, I only have like 60 more questions. Okay, okay, okay.

All right. Nobody cares about this quiz. I know, I know. This is the worst quiz. This quiz sucks. Okay, I'm so glad that I was right, knowing that this was not the perfect quiz. This quiz is lame as fuck. Nobody gives us shit about this quiz.

Wait, wait, wait, Aaron, hold on, wait. What? We were doomed from the start, the king is dead. That is fallout boy. It is fallout boy. That just feels fallout boy coded. I can't explain it, but the word doomed especially, that's so, so fall out boy.

Honey, honey. Honey. Next question. The objection to being stepped on. Fall out boy. Frost. Really? The objection to being stepped on is a poem written by the wonderful mustacheowed Robert Frost.

Is it about? about keeping his masculinity intact? No, it's more about how he has to like pick between two roads to walk down. He's like hemmen and hon. He's like, I could go there. The road less travel. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's called the objection of being stepped on. I don't get it. Someone's going to believe that, by the way. Next up, Brown's descent or the willy-nilly slide. Full out boy. Final answer? Yeah. Robert Frost.

Willie nilly didn't exist when Robert, Robert Frost. Robert Fropper. Robert Frappist. Hopi, appa, vape,

op and bopper tappled. She's speaking in op, everyone, stopper. Hopi, appa vapper, tapal, yappo,

api spapik, app, op and ropper, bpper, frappos. Wappas, op, bapig fapin,

up up, up of. Anyone, So you know pig Latin, right? No, it's so different. I know, that's what I'm saying. I'm trying to give a frame of reference for our brave listeners listening to that cringe you just said. This, she is speaking in op.

Can you, can you define what, how, the rules of op in a sentence or two? Wapel. Op. No, you can't do it in the fucking language. Bapa, dappen, oppa, vapon wappen dapper sap and wappen dapper sap and wappet, Wopet, op-eye, op-em-soppie-op-em-sopping. Okay, so basically what you do is you take a word and break it into syllables. And if the syllable starts with a consonant, you put the sound up after the consonant.

If the syllable starts with a vowel, you put the up before. So, for example, well. Wapel. There you go. How about Aaron, which has two syllables and both syllables start with a vowel. Uh-huh. E-R-I-N. Opper-op-N.

That's tricky. Napo. Napo. Opit, op is napa, thapat tropic hobby. Yapu-A-Japas thapat sapim-popal. We need a reseta stone for fucking op. Just, you know, I'm not talking about the software. I mean like the actual Rosetta Stone for for op the language where it's English.

Have I not spoken up on the podcast before? No, I'm sure you have. I've done this since I was 12. But it's also been, you know, three years. So like. Yeah, I don't remember. Yeah, I have no idea. If we've talked about before, we're going to talk about it again.

All right. I got a couple more questions for you. Don't worry. I won't exhaust the entire quiz. Give me a good one. Oh, you want a good one. Oh, you want a good one. Oh.

Let's do three more. And then and then we can. we can wrap it up. Yeah, absolutely. We need to talk for a while. Okay. She's a handsome woman. Panic.

Panic. I knew it. I knew it because I knew Brendan appreciates fucking women as a whole. Love that. Love that. And to Brandon. And to women as a whole. Yeah.

I think it's Brendan. Well, to Brandon and Brendan. I like them both. I think it's Brendan. Maybe it's Brandon. No, I think it's Brendan. We'll get him on the show and he can straighten it out. I think he's a dad now.

I don't think he has any interest in hanging out with us. Well, that's depressing. Yeah. Because we're fun. We're fun dinks. We're fun. We're really fun dinks. I'm fun.

You're okay. I'm a trip, but I'm fun. I'm a trip. Put that in your LinkedIn profile. I'm a trip, but I'm fun. London beckoned songs about money written by machines. Frost. Panic.

God damn it. Yeah. God damn it. That was another, another panic one. Christ. This quiz sucks. You suck. Last one.

Okay. Last one. And then you can get mad at me. Okay. Okay. How hard is it? Your dick? Wow.

That's disgusting. That is disgusting. What is wrong with you? Who's dick? How hard is it? A dick. To keep from being king. when it's in you

and in the situation. Men are disgusting. This is the final question, by the way. How hard is it to be in you to... It's the most confusing sentence I've seen in some time. How hard is it? It's Robert Frost. It is Robert Frost.

Because it doesn't make any sense. Wow, you win 35 points. I won all the points. Good job, baby. And you win for worst... quiz ever. Way to go, Jack film. I did it.

Really blowing it up. I did it. All right, guys. So here's the thing. I don't think we're going to do horoscopes anymore. But maybe we'll do horoscopes. Wait, honey. No.

Honey. Do you have horoscopes? Honey. Do you even know what season it is? What season is it? Well, on this June 10th, it is Gemini. I can't believe you know that. Aaron, could you do me the honor?

No. Please, do me the honor of just, and I'm definitely not handing you a pack of index cards to read verbatim for the first time blindly. Just look within your soul and your third eye, right? Any chakras and shit. And please deliver us the horoscope for today. Go for it. For Gemini season. Happy birthday Gemini's.

Horo, horoscope, horoscope time, time, time, time. Sorry, I'm really nervous. It's okay. Imagine me, Aaron Douglas. Uh-huh. She's so mad. Aaron Douglas, scared of a little scope. Try again.

Sorry. Horcopope. No. Sorry. Horposcop. Try again. Fuck. Hor cross corpo.

You got it. Shit. Rora borealis. That's not it. Sorry. Me so nervous. Come on, Aaron Douglas. How the fuck?

Oh my God. This is like I had a premonition. Get it together. We girls can do anything. That's right. Okay, Jack, why don't you hand me those cards so I can read out this week's horoscope. Aaron want cards now. You got it, honey.

Here you go. All you got to do. You're such a disgusting piece of it. All you got to do is read off these cards. I'm handing you right now, okay? Wait. I'm not ready yet. Oh, okay.

Still too nervous. That's fine. Gosh, Jack, you make this look so easy. Oh my God, thanks, honey.

I know it was my choice to name this. Aaron is the funny one. It was. It was. But me thinks, um, me thinks,

um, I love you're having so much fun with this. Just spit it out, me thinks I should have named it, um, me thinks I should have named it. my wife smiley face

all right interesting little tangent honey can you just can you just get on four glasses of wine is still not enough oh honey you've had more than that

this torture can you just get on with the horoscope please we're all dying it's Gemini season we're all dying to know what's in the store for Gemini's the season Gemini smile at a stranger today.

Oh, no. He thinks you're flirting with him. Quick, frown at him and shake your head. Okay. Oh, no. He's into that. Damn it. Quick.

Once again, also, men are disgusting. Quick, start coughing profusely so he thinks you're sick. Okay, good. That worked. Oh, no. He used to be a nurse and is totally comfortable being around sick people. Damn it. Quick.

Ask him what his birth chart is. Yes, it worked. He looks disgusted and is walking away. Astrology saves the day. Let's go. Wow. Wow. Wonderful horoscoping, honey.

Well done. Happy birthday and birth season, Gemini's. Jack has abused your season, and I'm so sorry for that. I didn't do any such thing. I will try to make that better next week. Oh, yeah, will you? I will try. Well, listeners, thus concludes our triumphant return to Aaron is the funny one.

Thank you so, so much for your patience over the years. We are so happy to have you back and so happy to do many more episodes of Aaron is the funny one. We have another bottle of Vuv that we might break out next week too. So sit tight on the Vivino app. Damn straight. Remember that from three years ago? I would love to hear if you guys still want to call in and text into the hotline. I have been paying for it. Believe it or not, I have been paying for it and it has still been active for the last three years.

Let's get that shit back up and running. So, Dad Hug Me 10. Oh my God. Dad Hug Me 10. I think it was Dad Hug Me 10. I think you're exactly right. So I've been still paying for it this whole time. I would love to hear your feedback and ideas and thoughts and just.

Oh my gosh, anything. Opinions or quiz ideas. Whatever. Since my quiz sucked, you know, like we would love some. Guys, guys, we're back. That was a big part of this is that if we're going to do it, we're going to do it. Yeah.

So we are back. It's happening whether you like it or not. Thanks for joining us. I can't wait to hear you guys, hear from you guys. And talk to you next week. Till next time, haters.