Escaping the Drift with John Gafford - Colt's.... Seething Over Why.... Christmas? EP 32

Episode Date: December 22, 2021

The Power Move Episode 31Learn and burn Entrepreneurship from serial entrepreneur John Gafford and his band of mayhem makers. From stripper poles to the oval office, business lessons are everywhere. This Week:It's the Christmas special! Join as the guys attempt to put Colt in the holiday spirit while discussing holiday traditions that may or may not still be with the times. With Chris Connell and Colt Amidan

from the art of the deal to keeping it real live from the simply vegas studios it's the power move with john gafford back again back again everybody really back again uh man super shout out already to you know what colt you get no nickname today we're going with chris cut man connell who threw the prize yes who threw the super cut up after i started talking and uh started this a few minutes ago and uh chris hits me with the bro you're not recording stop you gotta stop so yeah thank you for that. Sounded good. Welcome to The Power Move. My name is John Gafford.

I'm your host to the left of me, Colt Amidon. Yes, it's Amidon, not Amidon. And Chris Connell Esquire. And boys, we've made it through the year. Man, the year is just about up, and it's Christmas time, man. It sure is. It's Christmas time. It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

No, no, it doesn't. Vegas never looks like Christmas. It doesn't look like Christmas at all. Except for Bellagio. It's not the greatest. It really doesn't.

Bellagio is the greatest. I got to admit, I've been so busy. I finally got around to decorating the rest of my house. Like a couple of days ago. Really? I finally got around to it. Yeah.

We put the, you know, we threw the tree up with no ornaments on it. Yeah. We put that, we know we threw the tree up with no ornaments on it. Like, like Thanksgiving day after we did that, never got around

to putting ornaments on it. And then, and finally got ornaments on the tree like last week. And I finally got like all the, all the banisters and stuff done. So now we're done.

My wife had that stuff up like the day after Thanksgiving. I mean like all of it. I'm sure. I'm sure. She had a crew that came over to the lights. Did everything.

I let my kids put up my Christmas tree and it looks beautiful from my living room. But you walk in and when you come through my gates at my house, you see into my house. And they didn't put nothing on the back of the tree. Nothing on the back. I love those memes. They got Adam. Who's that guy from Maroon 5? Yeah, Adam Levine.

Adam Levine. And then Joe Exotic's husband husband the front of the tree back i told my kids i go you realize people everybody sees back of our tree just outside and they don't care well i figured you know i'm sitting here thinking today like what are we gonna do for christmas what we do for the christmas show and i'm like there's got to be so much about christmas that colt just hates there's just there just it just kind of has to be never thought about so much about this not a christmas things that he's going to hate and uh we can further prove that colt may or may not be a pod person so i found this article i sent it out i mean do you guys really love christmas is it your top three holidays oh my god it has to be it has to be i mean other do you guys really love Christmas? I love it. Is it your top three? Here we go. Is it your top three holidays?

Oh, my God. It has to be. It has to be. I mean, other than people. You know what? It's when I get to see my family, and I like my family. Every year, I get a phone call from somebody on Christmas Day trying to work. Trying to what?

Trying to work. It's always one of my Jewish clients or Jewish friends. Like, hey, it's Christmas. Close mouths don't get fed. Yep, yep, exactly. And maybe they're calling to give you a gift of a big deal. Did you ever think of it that way? I'll take it.

I'll work 365. I will too, but it's never been that. It's always stupid. I had to take calls on my wedding day if it was a big enough deal. Oh, I took one walking down the aisle. I paid for my wedding on a deal. Somebody was trying to talk to me about real estate. Walking down the aisle. Walking down. I go, this isn't time. They go, oh, that's right. And I sold them a property. Somebody was trying to talk to me about real estate. Walking down the aisle.

Walking down. I go, this isn't time. They go, oh, that's right. And I sold them a property. There you go. There you go. Well, I figured what we would do is we would go to the manliest place you can find to find holiday traditions and see if we think they're overrated, properly rated.

It's something that you do do or something you would never do. Or more importantly, something that Colt finds so offensive that I can get him to spin down the rabbit hole on an absolute rant. I was going to just say, we can just go say everything's overrated and just be done with this podcast. Can we go to the bar? Family. We're going to break it down.

So, so number one, according to good housekeeping is create some sort of, yeah, good. Now you're into it. Now you're excited about good housekeeping. Now you come on live.

My top three favorite magazines, X and Maxim and Playboy. Now you come to life. I like it. All right. So create a countdown routine, i.e. the advent calendar. Do you have an advent calendar or some sort of a countdown in your house, Connell? I sure do. I have children.

You have children. You know what's funny, though? I thought this was kind of a neat advent calendar. It's not the chocolates. We grew up with the 25 chocolate calendar thing right yeah and uh you know we really look forward to it and i remember how slow time moved back then yeah because it was forever until your next chocolate like a whole day it was a whole day and so we can get into the psychology of time which freaks me out but um my daughter had one that has little charms in it every day yeah so she opens up his little bracelet or yeah so now she's all blinged out she's walking around looking like mr t because

she puts them all on one because she she blinged it out she blinged it out so it's this little advent calendar just little trinkets yeah i kind of like that idea more than chocolate so what about you what about you what's that you colt uh we never do but somebody gave me one for uh giovanni and giovanni opened them all the same day. It was chocolate. He doesn't like chocolate. So he says, daddy, look, this one's a bear. And then he tells me, throw it away. Daddy, look, this one's a whatever. Throw it away. I just feel the good tidings seething through his body, right at you like a laser beam. Throw this chocolate in the trash.

In the Gafford household, we've always had one traditional advent calendar that has little things that come out and hang on the door a little little wooden ornament things and little wooden deal we've got that one and in the past we have done where they get little chocolates or they get we did a lego thing one year we're for hayden and whatever so yeah i think having a countdown thing especially if you have children um is important it's nice it's nice to pump the brakes on time yeah it is a little bit it is a little bit and nice. It's nice to pump the brakes on time. Yeah, it is a little bit. It is a little bit. And I think that's a good family member for them. Two, go out for Christmas Eve dinner.

Do you go out for Christmas Eve dinner or are you staying home? Colt, what say you? Oh, no. Both my family and my wife's family, Christmas Eve is the actual party. Everybody gets hammered, drunk, have a good time. Kids get presents. Christmas Eve. So you do all the presents Christmas Eve. Not not all of them my wife's family does all of them we don't but we do a present we we do huge parties christmas eve so yeah so you get absolutely hammered christmas

eve so your kids wake up at 5 a.m and you're hung over now yeah yeah now see this is all coming together as to why he hates christmas yeah christmas eve's huge for us we never go out eating on christmas eve we throw it's the same thing we have meatball sandwiches pasta uh we'll have the exact same stuff every year for consistency by the way colt did list a meatball sandwich in his top he did he did so we went to lunch today we went to lunch today and we were trying to get something light, and the place we were going to eat that was light was really busy. So right next to it was Carmine's, which is delicious.

And I look at Colt, and I look him in the eyes, and I'm like, you need to hear this. You don't have to order the chicken parmesan sandwich, Colt. You don't have to order it. It's on you if you do it. I think it's a pretty nice one. We always went for Chinese dinner on the 24th. My wife doesn't open presents on the 24th. We did my whole doesn't um open presents on the 24th we did my

whole life all of them yeah is that a canadian thing i don't know it's my parents thing we go for chinese food we would open the presents and we'd like buck on that night it was fun and do that yeah see what with us and luckily we're able to continue the same tradition with my kids because i moved my mom here several years ago on christ Eve. We go over to my mom's house. She does like an hors d'oeuvre thing. She gives them their gifts. They're allowed to open one gift Christmas Eve because the majority of the mayhem is going to happen the next day on Christmas Day. So that's where we go with that.

Why is it always the Chinese restaurants open? Because they don't celebrate Christmas. Yeah, there's a Christmas. I know, but like. Don't your Chinese clients call you or just the Jewish ones? Just Jewish ones. Always Jewish. Maybe expand your networking.

Maybe I need to. Yeah, I don't understand this. Make the tree special, it says. For us, I know we try to let the kids get an ornament every year just to give Gidget one more thing to cry about when they're all gone is, I believe, the purpose for that. But yeah, I think that's our little thing with the tree. Do you have anything special you do with the tree?

We all give our godchildren ornaments every year too. But, no, I think, you know, people sit there and sing a song around it or, you know, that Brady Bunch type of family. We're not that family. My wife has a thing where we don't put presents under the tree until Christmas Eve. Like none of them. None. I like to see it grow a little bit because she's like well santa has to bring them exactly yeah yeah that's true yeah it's true all right cook together on christmas

morning nope no no i think this was okay this would not be written if it was written in sports illustrated this is obviously a good housekeeping because know, most of the time if you've got small kids and you still get to go through this, you're going to be up deep putting shit together. Oh, yeah. And you're still there. That Barbie Dreamhouse, son, don't call me. Because nobody helped me, I'm not helping you. It's just how you're going to have to get through that yourself.

So, yeah, traditionally, Gidget, you know, I was the putter together of things. Gidget is the great... The battery, get that one screw that holds the battery. And let's face it, before the card starts, you really just got time to throw the cinnamon rolls in a good cup of coffee anyway. That's all you got. You're good to go with that.

Number five, take a family photo. That's pretty nice. Yeah. I think we do it. Yeah, I'd say we do that 90% of the time. We do Santa. Yeah, I'd say we do that 90% of the time. We do Santa Claus pictures. We had to, for my mom, our family's whole thing is you have to do Santa Claus pictures until you have kids.

Then it can pass off. So if you're 30 with no kids, I was doing it. My brother was doing it at 30 years old, Santa Claus pictures. That's kind of what we did. So you have to send mom a Santa Claus picture until you have an offspring to replace said children in Santa Claus. Yep. So we do that.

And it's typically not actually like a hired Santa. It's just a guy with a white beard on E Street. Something random. Yeah, exactly. It's not a real Santa. We just, you know. It's just roughly. Can I sit on your lap?

Can I sit on your lap? We were passing, and my daughter goes, they kind of creep me out, guys that are Santa Claus in the mall. And I sat there and thought about, kind of creepy. Yeah, because they don't like the smell of bourbon. Whereas you do, Cole. Whereas you do. I'm like, I bonded with them. I bonded with them.

I was going to martini. Speaking of this, you know, I got a question, because I thought this was a little strange. Have you guys been to the Summerlin Christmas thing at the ballpark? Did you go out to that thing? Did you go out there? Oh, no. It looks nice, but it's like 50 a person. But here's the problem.

It's too nice. Yeah. We went out there Friday, and no offense, but I think that in itself summed up the difference between Summerlin and the rest of Las Vegas, which is it essentially was nothing more than a giant Instagram backdrop. It was really all it was. There was no soul to it. I'm like, as I'm walking around, I'm like- So you're saying everybody in Summerlin sold this?

No, I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm just saying- Did you hear that, Chris? I'm saying I tell people- I tell people- Shot at Gavin. I tell people when they ask me what the difference is

between Henderson and Summerlin, I tell them it's the same difference between Dallas and Houston. And you go to Dallas and there's going to be a guy with a $3,000 hat on that's got 50 bucks in the bank. You go to Houston, there's a guy driving a pickup truck with 100,000 head of cattle and you have no idea. And I think the money is a little more hidden in Henderson than it is in Summerlin. And Summerlin's very flashy. I totally agree. Did you watch Yellowstone?

I did. I might have to stop watching Yellowstone. I might have to stop because literally my visceral gut instinct in dealing with people in business when they're difficult is take them out of the barn and string them up. That's my instantaneous response. That's already my default. The my default my default emotion i want to become a cowboy now yeah it's just well no you want to get into a question pretty badly well how could you how could you not how could you not but back to but back to the christmas thing on the pictures

opportunity village i don't think you're any danger of losing your money because i love the kitschiness of opportunity village with that little train and the stuff. And it's just, give me the, for Christmas, I don't want perfectly packaged perfect. I want kitschy. I want kitschy. I don't like sterile in general. Yeah, unless it's Santa. I'd do a sterile Santa.

A sterile Santa, I'd prefer that. Just sanitize. Sanitize Santa. Sanitized. Sanitized is creepy. That's it. Santa Claus creeps me it all right next one send letters or cards we were just we were just talking about this we were just discussing the christmas card and the uh so let's talk about christmas card etiquette like when you get them how long do you keep do you keep them through the whole holidays do you have that whole thing covered do you keep, do you keep them through the whole holidays? Do you have that whole thing covered? Do you find yourself,

if there's a card attached to a gift, you keep the gift that it's a card. What do you mean? You're on my, you're on my very lovely Christmas party. You didn't know you sent me one. You probably didn't know you sent them out. I didn't know.

No, not yet. I don't think so. No, I don't think so. I got, I mailed them. I mailed them like on Friday.

We are me and my wife. We're just not that type of family. I'm, I don't think we got jobs. I got jobs. I mailed them like on Friday. See, we are, me and my wife, we're just not that type of family. I wasn't the last couple years. I always mean to be. So this year I did it early. I said, no, we've ordered the cards to mail out. My wife has two or three years of cards that were never mailed out because by the time we got around to it, it was like, I'm not sending February. I will tell you this, and i'm not one that does it and

we probably should do it more i am all about the funny picture christmas card at least you're making an effort remember when i dressed up as a cholo and had the suicidal tendencies that on i think i do like the bandana that was that was my favorite that's high quality those ones yeah that's high quality like if you're just and i think even we did this year because we just had this pictures taken for for something that we did yeah we got yours and we just it's just a very sterile family picture like i i felt no effort for that and and honestly if you got it i appreciate you getting it you look nice look at it you don't have to keep it i mean if i said just something funny so i think if i think christmas cards have a much greater effect

when they have some level of humor or self deprecating. Yeah. I like, I like when they're cute personally, but just, yeah, I appreciate getting them though. Cause I remember everyone who sent one so far. I did too. I've gotten,

I've gotten a bunch of them. I remember every single one. Yeah. Because that became your Christmas card. None from Amidon, but it's okay. We honestly, if it was up to my wife,

my kids willing to get presents. God, what a gem. She's a national treasure. She really is. Just hold her close to you and i'm not either we don't i was telling john at lunch we do not give each other presents me and my wife this year i was like oh i found something you want i'm going to buy it from you guess what

showed up three days later john and i just want to make it difficult for our wives to buy his present but that doesn't mean i don't want a present you know what i did you know what i did this month i made it easy on her whenever i had the impulse to buy something starting from about thanksgiving i just texted to her so caitlin got me that and what i did is i went and bought everything on our list indiscriminately just okay yep yep i'm like uh ron burgundy i just read whatever's on the teleprompter bang it all down two nights ago i went christmas shopping got walked out there with two coats for me and that was what's great yeah i just i feel like we need to do i mean forget a show i think we need to do Two nights ago, I went Christmas shopping. I walked out of there with two coats for me, and that was it. What's Christmas for you? Yeah.

I feel like we need to do, I mean, forget a show. I think we need to do a whole series into Colts family. Let's do like an MTV-style Cribs or like Follow Me. Listen, I'm telling you right now. It would be Davidoff, Cigar Bar. If you are by chance listening to this and you're any type of television producer, follow Colts family around with cameras. How could this not be a number one hit?

It's like Al Pacino in Scent of a Woman. Don't lose them, embrace them. My family is, you know what? My daughter's the most ruthless one out of us all. And she is so sweet, innocent looking. Yeah, when she heard me even talking about maybe not being able to make the quinceañera yesterday, she came around the corner with a quickness and gave me that.

You trying me, Holmes? What's up? I didn't say for sure we were going to be able to come. I said maybe we could come. We're going to die now. We're going to die. Oh boy. Okay, I don't even know what this is. You remember how we had the audacity to schedule our anniversary on her kids?

Yeah. Can you believe that? Can you believe we did that? Has anybody heard of this? Celebrate Sinterklaas in early December. Sinterklaas, known as St. Nicholas Day, is celebrated on December 5th when scent tradition leaves a small gift. Has anybody heard of that? Yeah, it's a shoe.

You barely celebrate Christmas. Is this a Netherlands version? This sounds like something Dwight Schrute would do on The Office. It's a small gift. Has anybody heard of that? Yeah, it's a shoe. You barely celebrate Christmas. Is this a Netherlands version? This sounds like something Dwight Shute would do on The Office. It's a European thing. It's a European thing. All right. Yeah, no, we did. We used to leave a shoe out.

Leave a clamshell underneath the clogs. You used to leave a shoe out and they'd give you some sort of present. Yeah. So you've heard of this? Oh yeah, it's a European thing. Something about a streusel under your clogs. Spaniard. It's either through my Spaniard side or my Italian side.

Whatever it is, it doesn't sound like freedom. No, it doesn't sound like freedom. That was actually more. Tell me what to do two days a year. You get one day a month. You can't tell me what to do. Two days a month. I'm going to leave my shoe out. Number eight, choose a fun tree topper, which I think, I mean,

don't you marry to the tree topper once you buy it? They make them too heavy now, though. Somebody had a meme going around that said, I couldn't choose between a star or an angel, so I picked both. It's a picture of Brendan Fraser on top of the tree.

That's awesome. Oh street that's awesome choose between a star and an angel yeah i uh we go with the star but they seem to be just getting heavier and heavier trees can't support them yep you know what i do here's a piece of umbrage i do take with the star on the tree is when they don't give you very much to plug into you know because you got to light that up it's a power source yeah come on tree light people let's get some slack on the thing yeah yeah some cost-cutting initiative back in the 80s give it half it's not just carry it over and make your life difficult that's what it is no so i mean i just wanted another extension cord down the back of the tree. Yeah. Yeah, come on. You have to.

You have to. Chainsaw power. Number nine, host a movie marathon. I think, have you watched any Christmas movies? I watched Die Hard and Home Alone. That's all I need. You have to. Die Hard, best Christmas movie ever.

Die Hard. Die Hard. Die Hard, right? Colt, best Christmas movie. Home Alone. I don't like Die Hard. And then three is Christmas Carol with Alistair Sim. I read the best meme

the other day it said uh it said keep in mind that kevin mcallister could have called the police at any time and been safe oh he wanted he wanted the war he wanted to hunt the men he wanted them to die he enjoyed it you know i was like that's because he could have just called the cops you can't tell me not one neighbor was there. You know what the best Christmas movie is? It's Friday After Next. That'd be my top one Christmas movie. How is that a Christmas movie?

Sorry, go on. Do you remember? DJ Pooh wearing a... No, remember the Santa Claus... Santa Claus robbed them? They put a party on? I hate Christmas movies. You know what the worst is?

What's the one where the kid gets her eye shot? You're going to get your eye shot out? What movie is that? A Christmas Story? A Christmas Story. Oh, my God. Did they make a worse movie? No, you got to watch that at least once during Christmas, dude.

You got to. I will watch. Miracle on 31st Street? Horrible. Every time an angel dies or whatever it is an angel comes alive whatever it is uh i will watch christmas vacation yes that's hilarious i'll watch that every time and then i'll watch there was one more i was going to say and i forgot so um must not have been that good yeah so john you remember so i don't want to blow anything because I feel like this is something people don't know about. If they did know about it, they would be a lot more expensive and less available.

Okay. So you cut this out if I'm going to have something up. Yeah, if it's going up, go ahead. But Christmas Vacation is one of the Cinemark you can rent out a whole theater for. We did that last year. It's a hundred bucks. I think we did do that last year. We did that last year.

It's a hundred dollars. Yeah, we did that last year. Yeah. And we did that last year. So. And we did that last year. So that was a new movie. That was that one where Russell Crowe's all fat. No, no, no. No, no, no.

We did it. We did it for Christmas Vacation. Yeah, so Christmas Vacation is one of the ones you can do. It's $100. And there was something about that movie that we were like, I'd never seen that before. It was either the very beginning or the very end. Maybe it was a cinematic version. Maybe it was.

But anyway. Scrooge. I like Scrooge. Scrooge is pretty was. Scrooge. I like Scrooge. Scrooge is pretty good. Scrooge is great. Bill Murray. Bill Murray. Yeah, I wore my Bill Murray socks this year.

So getting a movie theater together might be something that's pretty smart. Yeah, that could be cool. Yeah, again, get the family together, people together, and go run a movie theater. I like that. I like that.

Carefully selecting a tree. I think this is a geographical thing. Yeah, we did that growing up. We used to get nice Christmas trees, but now everything's fake now. Get a fake tree. I can remember going to a tree farm once as a kid with my dad. Florida? Yeah.

Really? No, dude. Okay, my dad was like into everything. They have tree farms. Well, yeah, my dad owned a tree farm. That was the point. That's true. But not a Christmas tree. No, no, no. was like into everything. I guess. He was- They have tree farms. Well, yeah, my dad owned a tree farm. That was the point. That's true. But not Christmas tree.

No, no, no. They're pine trees. So you own tree farms, which are pines, and then you sell- Pine trees. I'm aware of what kind of trees they are. Are they- No, it's actually- I guess you have pine.

Tree farms are a great business. It costs you nothing to run. And then every fall, you sell the pine needles to the landscaping people who come and get the pine needles they harvest them to use from mulch and whatever and then eventually you cut the trees down and sell them for pulpwood is what you do so yeah not know that yeah that's a good but i remember doing that but yeah i like i don't understand especially here in the desert you'd have a an actual new christmas somebody has a tree fire i've never seen somebody with a real christmas tree in las vegas

no no i haven't i saw it there was a meme with like uh keanu reeves had one strapped to the hood of his porsche or something the other day oh yeah i did yeah i was like wow but no get a fake tree that's john wick he can do whatever he wants that's a good point the question is awesome i bet he personally killed that tree but i bet he but he did shocker but i like john wick pencil yeah he used that he used dental floss and soldered it down okay all right see here okay here's we're getting to the dark side we're getting to the dark side of christmas right here spread a little magic with elf on the shop i absolutely hate that and i'm sorry so my daughter cried today because because

it was time for recompense. She touched one of them. She knows good goddamn well that if you touch an elf. You know how much money that just saved for you in presents, though? Good Lord. No, no, no. You touch one. She's two and a half.

Yeah. She walks downstairs. I don't know if my kid's smart or just obsessed about this elf, but she walked in. I put them all in the tree because I had to go. I was doing morning jujitsu, so I was changing them out. Put them on the tree. There's only four, and she's used to five because my daughter brought hers over thinking she's doing us a favor by having more elves oh god like thanks ava yeah anyway i'm still mad about it you got five you got five elves we gotta hide every day so they're up on the thing

and whatever so she touched one of them but if it's always a group outing you don't split them off it's a group out okay i don't know it's really not that much more you still have to account for five as opposed to one yeah it's a pain in the ass you can do 20 as much with five as you can with one yeah so she touched one so he's gone so i had to hide him in the thing because he goes back to north pole he goes to the hospital like remember you touched him she's like starts crying christmas traumatization perfect good job well you touched the elf i didn't make the rules my son's such a dick he went to a house and they're like you can't touch the elf i mean who doesn't want to grow up in colt's house i know and he sat there and all

he kept doing is walking by slapping the elf and laughing and they were the kids were freaking out crying and he thought he's laughing i'm like yeah that's my kid we don't do the elf on the shelf i mean my kid knows if they'll get their ass whooped if they don't do good we had so we gave our off on the shelf a name which was i think you have to i'll give them all a name right and the first one was uh it was henny denny do was that was the name that my kids gave this elf, right? And then, of course, from year one to year two, almost planned by Hallmark, I believe, you lose the damn thing. You forget where you hide it, right? Because you don't put it with the Christmas decorations because you've got to bust it out way before. You can't find it.

Way before. So it has to be different. So we lose Henny Denny Dew. So we're like, what are we going to do? We've got to go to another one. And now it's like caught on. So we go to the store and the only So we're like, what are we going to do? We've got to go to another one. And now it's like caught on. So we go to the store and the only one we can find has different hair color. So originally you're like, they won't notice.

Yeah. My household didn't notice. So then we have Henny Denny Bob because Henny Denny Dew was on vacation. Oh, yeah. And so then we kind of had to alternate between the two. I don't think they were ever necessarily in the house together. But I got to tell you, there were many, many a night when i would wake up you know you're like in that twilight period we're like and i'm finally just not over that oh shit and you're

like i gotta move this damn elf fucking elf yeah you gotta come with the elf and you know look everybody wants their children to believe in santa claus for as long as possible and have that christmas magic and hang on to it and really love that but there was no finer moment in my life that i found out the office bullshit because i'm like i'm never hiding this thing again i'm done this is awesome i'm done with it we don't do things the two things you want to get over yeah is that and having people give your kids gifts that make noise yeah and real quick if you're under like eight years old and you're listening to this first of all very proud very proud of you very proud of you for listening to something that's going to help you in your life but also yeah santa's not real let's go cut to the chase and save you some trouble stop buying people gifts

that make noise just yeah you better make sure your social media guy doesn't cut that up and throw it all over anthony anthony and romeo before he had kids used to love to buy my kids gifts that made like he would oh dude he would bring it over oh yeah just you thought it was the funniest thing ever to do that that was his kids now he has kids it ain't so funny so do you buy him now you should buy him one of those piano sets or oh my god drum sets or those relentless animals he's got sing he's got two and one on the way i should get them all like the whole band. Load up the house. Make it something obnoxious,

like something that belts out the whole frozen. There is nothing. The whole song. Just the whole thing. There's nothing more obnoxious than drums. My kid plays drums. He starts and I'm like, just let him do it.

It's good for him. Yeah. Like 30 seconds into it, I'm calling. He doesn't answer. I call my daughter. Go in there and tell him to freaking shut up. I. Like 30 seconds into him calling. He doesn't answer. Call my daughter. Go in there and tell him the freaking shut up. Hate drums.

Hate the drums. Jesus. You know what? I like to think. What's it like living up at the top of Mount Crumpit? How's Mount Crumpit this time of year at the very top? He's going to steal Christmas for sure. Call this dog up there and just plot it.

My dog and my wife. She's worse than me. Number 12. Use a nutcracker. I mean, is anybody like feasting on walnuts anymore? My kid's allergic.

It's nice. I mean, I guess. My grandparents always had one, so there's a bit of nostalgia for me. Yeah, there you go. I don't have any. In fact, there's a complete absence of nuts in my house these days with having two daughters, a wife, and a female dog. Yeah, there you go. Oh, boy. Keep talking on that.

Let's hear it. There you go. Number 13, get in touch with Santa. Having kids write the letter to Santa. Did you ever have your kids like mail? Did you ever throw it in their phone? Did you ever do that? Write the letter out?

Yeah, but I'm in the stage where I have one who's 13 and one who's two. Yeah. So the two can't do it yet, and the 13 hasn't done it in years. Yeah. Kids don't do it. God, you guys make me feel like I'm a shitty parent, but no. Well. The shit fits me.

Sorry, Colt. Sorry about that, buddy. We were trying to make you feel that way, but if that's kind of how the ball bounces. You guys feed your kids three times a day? Wait, what? You feed them? That's a thing? You're just handing out love over them?

What's wrong with you people? Did you guys watch the dateline of the family that had like 13 kids and kept them in the The Duggars? Yeah. The Duggars. D duggers or something that was super sad the kids like 30 years old and he sounds like a 12 year old they don't they don't even know what medication is the cops ask them medication anyways yeah that's dreadful i i do that's not the duggers that was that was the lady that uh that was the lady that in utah that was treating her uterus like a clown car she had like 27 kids and counting or whatever it was it's like come on lady come on now you're just showing up and the oldest one i think just got popped by like kiddie porn or something oh yeah because he never had a childhood probably yeah like i'm serious welcome you're an adult now you're raising these other kids that's how it works all right well let's take a break and then we're going to

come back and colt's going to spread some more christmas holiday cheer hey it's john gafford if you want to catch up more and see what we're doing you can always go to thejohngafford.com where we'll share any links that we've things we talked about on the show as well as links to the youtube where you can watch us live and if you want to catch up with me on instagram you can always follow me at the john gafford i'm here give me a shout ho ho ho mother truckers back from the break i feel like i feel like you know i i feel like colt you're setting yourself up nice for like a christmas miracle like somehow right yeah like like somebody's gonna come put some joy in your heart or the maybe i am okay maybe i'm the living scrooge you might know what you know what else god man you know what i used to do i did love

was ben crosby's uh baby it's cold outside and now these woke fucks make it so i can't even listen to that song yeah that's that song's dead but let's let's okay let's pretend that's a great song let's let's take it i like where this. But let's pretend. That's a great song. I like where this is going. Let's take a trip down Colt's life as the ghost of Christmas past, present, and future. So if we go into the past, what's the Colt Amidon tear-jerking moment that you're going to see something that's going to turn you from the optimistic the optimistic anything's possible you know the world is magical and do the cynical like just oh my kids did right like i i did it your kids did this i no i i absolutely hated christmas okay you did i've always said why

because i think it's everybody's fucking fake hang on hang, hang on, hang on. You're seven years old. You don't hate Christmas. No, I didn't really love it. I really didn't. I've never loved Christmas. I don't understand. It's possible. At the time of year, we got stuff. It was the number one thing I looked forward to.

Yeah, but we weren't rich, so everybody got the nice stuff. No, but you got stuff. That's the only time we really got the things that we wanted all year. You know what it was? You were dragged around all these Christmas, having to go see people do stuff. It just was not a fun time of year. I love that we got off the school. I wasn't a huge Christmas fan.

I've never been a Christmas person. I mean, honestly, I absolutely think it's overrated. I think people are fake. I hate running people at the mall that you absolutely hate, and they come up and pretend to be your friend. Like, no, go fuck yourself. You don't like me. If this was June, you wouldn't like me. I hate running people at the mall that you absolutely hate and they come up and pretend to be your friend like no go Fuck yourself. You don't like me if this was June you wouldn't like me. I got just I think everything's fake about it I hate having to take frickin days out of my year to go shop for people. Sorry. I don't like you that much

I'd like to point out Cold does take time out of his life to feed the homeless and do a lot of worthwhile things. So if you're listening to this for the first time, you're like, who the fuck is this guy? Like, A, you're kind of within your rights to think that. But he does have some like- He also hates Tom Hanks. He does. Okay, there's that.

Did you see Tom Hanks on, what was it? I just saw it on my, oh, Saturday Night Live. God, how obnoxious is that guy oh you know i i just him for being friendly like what to me if you want to buy me something go donate it to the children like don't i just i what about a cigar cold i'll go buy it myself i don't need i don't need your presence i just I feel like he's getting angry. I'm supposed to put him in a good mood, now we're angry.

God, no. You guys are like, what's today? The 23rd, 22nd, 21st, whatever. I've not shopped for anybody yet. Now you're giving me anxiety. I'm like, oh my God, I got to go shop. I haven't got my kid shit yet.

I'm sure your wife has. Oh, absolutely not. That's a prevention. I swear to God, my wife will say the kids don't need any more oh boy they don't need presents like i have to go buy my shoes like that jehovah's witness family in the neighborhood we'd be like why didn't that kid get christmas yeah i don't know he's weird as though so okay i'll share i'll share like my number one thing i remember as a kid, being like Christmas magic, and then maybe it'll inspire a cult jar as memory to remember something in his dome

that was positive about this holiday. But when I was a kid, so my parents got divorced, obviously, when I was about six, and one of the things you should never do is divorce a Southern attorney in a very small Southern town because you're going to come up South on the end of that divorce decree. So yes, we got the house

and we always had a roof over our heads and stuff, but we didn't have a lot of money being kids. And my mom worked very hard and my dad in the early days, I mean, obviously made up for that later in life with college and everything, but in the early days when we were kids, not a lot of support coming through

other than like food and house. So as a kid i started playing drums and in and i and i at one point i'd gotten my first real drum set like real drum set right but it didn't come with any cymbals and i'd gotten it like maybe three or four months before christmas and my mom was like well you know we'll see what we can do we'll get you cymbals for christmas and i was like cool whatever right on you know so you know here right on right on right symbol it was yes it was right on seriously that's what i did there and anyway so so i'm working through this thing and so i'm playing my drum set but i don't have any symbols i'm just tapping on the stands where

they would be and christmas comes around and i opened my mom gives me a gift and i open up a gift and it's one hi hat symbol. It's one. And I was so thrilled. And she was like, I didn't have the money to get them all, but I got you this one and we'll see what we can do later on for your birthday. I was so happy to have the one symbol. I couldn't even stand it.

Yeah. And then she was screwing with me and actually got me not just the high hat, but also the ride. But, but I was so happy even just to have the one. It was like, it's half the puzzle. dude i i remember that more than kind of anything isn't that kind of crazy how these things can mean so much to normal people who have childhood memories about people being thoughtful just so people are

clear like i had the most amazing parents my parents are the best they make christmas great again i just i've never liked i don't like christmas music oh my god christmas music's the most annoying thing ever mariah carey you don't listen to that no nothing thanks she makes so much money this time of year oh my god have you seen have you speaking of the greatest memes ever have you seen them with all the goth guys dancing to Mariah Carey? No. Oh, dude. I'm going to have to pull this up. And if you're not.

The only Christmas song I liked was that big Crosby. They always use that punk rave. Yeah, the punk rave. They're like doing the. Yeah. No, she makes bank. Good for her. You know, I like the Christmas.

I like the snow. I like the snow. I like the days off. We had a good childhood. I had an amazing childhood. I want to hold it away from the mic a little bit just so you can't hear the music because we'll get hammered from using proper stuff. So I'm looking at it. What the?

It's just everything. Oh, my God. I like that one when they do it do that one if you haven't seen this just google goth people dancing tomorrow that is amazing are they under a they're under an overpass overpass video has brought so much joy to me so much joy yeah i've never seen that yeah can you sax the benny hill okay so so my So my positive memory didn't bring you into the normal world. Listen to this. Okay, my mother-in-law, who's touched.

We'll just go with touch as an easy phrase. Like when the South people talk, people from the South describe people. She's touched. Touched. Touched. And this is what she tells Gidget she wants to do for Christmas. Ready? She tells Gidget that she wants to give the kids, my kids, a Christmas card.

And each of them are going to have a penny taped in it. This is what she tells them. Each one's going to have a penny. And so Roma's going to open up hers first. And then she's going to say, what am I supposed to do with a penny? And then Hayden's going to open his. And just because he's nicer, he's going to say,

oh, thanks for the card, Ama. And then I'm going to hand him $200. And then I'm going to say, and because you were nice about it, I was going to give Roma $200. I'm going to give that to hayden too this was this was my mother-in-law's christmas miracle fucking plan my wife is like are you out of your gourd yeah yeah zero chance this is gonna happen no zero set a kid up for failure and do literally the least thing possible oh my god well that doesn't deserve niceness no it's like a fuck you it's a complete this is this is what you do i might start that tradition i might be like i'm on to something i'm going to put all the everybody that i see i'm

going to give that okay this is gonna be that now it's perked him right up shove your fucking british tip up your ass yeah aust. Because that's how Australians or whatever, oh, it's great service. I left you a penny. And that is the story that perks you up? That's the one that makes you go. I don't like it. I'm going to watch people's reaction

if they really like love that I gave them a card. See, that's not necessarily about gratitude because here's the thing. There's a cultural implication about Christmas and your grandmother. Here's the thing. As a kid, you look forward to something right you have expectations now yeah yeah you say well look at these poor kids in uh you know turkmenistan they don't get the same that we don't live in turkmenistan we we have a cultural expectation it's our cultural tradition

we don't get things in the summer solstice either no so we have a thing it's christmas all media television has a thing where that's okay kids you can expect a little bit of juice because you don't have the power to earn income yeah you don't you're not out there doing stuff the one time well this isn't china that's what i'm saying it's also not you know what i'm saying so it's like yeah that's the time when you shouldn't celebrate the summer solstice it's a big time of year in my big time of course that's my favorite solstice and there we go but you know it's funny in researching this i read an article along those lines which said what's the worst christmas gift you ever got this guy was like when i was a kid

when i was like a little kid my parents made me this really custom art set and they kept adding stuff to it. And as they would bring stuff home and go up to the attic to add stuff to this homemade art set they were making me, they'd always make jokes like, we gotta go feed your Christmas gift or we gotta take your Christmas gift for a walk. So instead on Christmas day

when they hand me the amazing handmade art set, I was crushed and in a puppy. Because expectation is reality. reality expectation is absolutely reality and i think that's fair you'll never be hurt like i said you take a kid a kid without the power to earn income they have a thing because they can't go out and get it themselves right no one time a year it's okay to spoil your kids i just feel that way yeah yeah but i think my kids are spoiled year-long. Well, that's probably true. Well, they get to live with you, Colt.

I mean, what more joy could they have? What more joy could they desire? Start a holiday. I have to force my family to put up a tree. My mom yelled at me one year because we didn't have a tree up. And I'm like, all right. And my kids are like, I don't want to put it up. You put it up. I feel like if you see colt on the street in the next two weeks give

a hug a hug i feel like you need a hug hey how you doing touch me you'll get throat punch do not hug me guys i will throat punch you all right anybody can send me a picture of colt of hugging colt i will give you 20 bucks and it cannot be a family member or someone that he knows hug colt take a photo 20 bucks. And it cannot be a family member or someone that he knows. Hug Colt, take a photo, 20 bucks from me. Send me the picture and your Venmo and I will send you $20. Random people can hug Colt

in public between now and the new year. Feel free. Amidon. There you go. What did I say? No, I said Colt Amidon. He's going to be your free kitty this week. Hug Colt. Send me your Venmo and the photo. i say no it's called amadan yeah called eminent he's he's gonna be your your you know that's it your free kitty this week hug colt hug colt $20 send me your venmo and the photo and uh and yeah all good number 14 start a holiday themed collection do you guys collect anything from

i need less to collect i want yeah i'm with that too get it in get it out people are like collecting oh i get it no like uh uh my family would uh collect like uh these beautiful angels and stuff like that like the humble the humble figures yeah but you know what i would like to move away from collecting unless it has historical significance you have more collection of anything yeah but it's all cool stuff i don't need more like dishes no little figurines that mean nothing other than having figures i swear someone steals my forks. Someone comes to my house and steals my forks. My problem right now is I'm battling the squishable battle at my house. Time to get rid of them.

Dude, my daughter has, I mean, it looks like the store when you walk. It's that many of these things. And now she's going to the swap meets with them, and she trades at the squishable mall events, and they trade them and hustle, which I kind of like that because she's teaching her how to hustle and negotiate. She's got inventory. Yeah, she's cutting some good deals down there,

so I do kind of like that end of it. Number 15, go caroling or host a sing-along? Leave people alone. No one wants to hear your horrible singing. If you're not Mariah Carey, do not freaking come and carol. But if someone hits your ring doorbell and they're standing out there, I don't want a lot for Christmas. If anybody sends me a video of caroling in front of Colt Amadeus' house

between now and Christmas. You are not getting through the guard gates. Trust me. Anybody call you're not on the guard gate, you're not getting through. Honestly, is that not the most annoying thing? I went to the country club's Christmas party. They had carol right over my head i'm like shut up shut up i want my freaking old-fashioned without anybody yelling in my ear oh my god no no not even not even uh tis the spirit huh no nothing yeah as a kid we would go to my mom's friend, Mrs. Anderson,

and we would all go caroling as children through their neighborhoods. And in retrospect, I'm with you. Because there's that, you know, you don't realize it as a kid, but as an adult, it's like if I had a bunch of kids standing outside my house singing, you got to kind of stand there in the doorway and kind of nod along and smile and kind of look at them like, can I, you know, game's on. How long, is this a whole show?

Is this one song? What's my obligation here to stay in the doorway? And so, yeah, I'm with you. That's called caroling. I'm with you, caroling. That was, in all fairness, the day before the iPod. I think I have one for you, Colt. I think I have one.

Play Holiday Hide and Seek. My mom hides a pickle ornament on the Christmas tree for the family to find. I thought that was going to be something romantic to do with your wife. I was going to say, I play a little hide and seek. Hide the pickle. Watch the pickle disappear. It's completely different. It's a completely different meaning of the M&A now.

Now Colt's starting to like Christmas. That's a tradition I get by. One time a year. I like it at it in summer solstice look for decked halls on christmas eve what does that even mean take a stroll and check out the christmas decorations on christmas eve look around um i do kind of i i appreciate people thing to me is it i say i like how many decades like some of that dude some of the houses like boulder city legit you know what in utah was always nice because it's gorgeous there's snow you probably did the same with canada it's gorgeous christmas lights are like whatever but in the snow it is that that is pretty yeah i just appreciate the effort like you go full on out i'm

i'm not i'm not a curmudgeon about that stuff. I think it's great. I like when they have the parades. When people in the neighborhood got together and did big blowout decorations. I thought that was a cool community thing. I like the boat parades. I think that's cool too. Those are cool.

When I lived in LA, they had a street that they did it. It was awesome. Pretty cool. Boat parades are fun. Newport boat parade is pretty cool. Like it was awesome. Pretty cool. All parades are fun. Newport boat parades. Pretty cool. That is cool. Good stuff.

Um, let everyone open one present on Christmas Eve. Again, this is something that, yeah, this is my, that's what we do in my household. Yep.

Mine too. Everybody gets to open the one, but it's never anything good. I mean, I found something they can play with that night. Yeah. Like a remote control car, a video game.

Yeah. Like, like, like we go to my Nana's house, you know, when I was a kid and we would all get in, i had a cousin my age my sisters like we all had like cousins our age and we all kind of got the same stuff and then you hit to that age when you're like 14. you know what i actually thought just for for strictly uh nostalgia getting my son like the

old the english leather gift pack the what like cologne with the wood top on the – No, the English leather cologne with the wood top. Just because like – Get him some Brut. Like 15 and that's what you're – Old Spice. What is the Christmas present you get excited for now? Nothing I can mention on the air.

So my wife last year – So my wife got me the Castor Troy 24-karat gold.45 ACP custom handgun last year for Christmas. Yeah, it's pretty solid. Yeah, I was pretty excited about that. Yeah, Gidget always asks me, she's like, what do you want for Christmas? And I get a wily Christmas smile that she says,

that I can put under the tree. I had the pickle. There you go. There you go. That's the game we want. do you know what do you look forward to as a honestly anymore and i saw again underwear that's what that's why i get yearly but i'll say this i think somebody put up a thing like you know uh when you ask your husband what he wants for christmas and he says nothing it's because christmas is more the joy that he gets watching you open your stuff and the kids open their stuff. That's enough.

You know what's funny? It's the little things that you don't think about that make it special. My wife got me this thing. It's an iPhone charger that plugs into the golf cart that I keep on my golf bag. That thing has saved me countless times. Oh, yeah.

And you wouldn't think about it, but it clips onto my bag, so it's always on my golf bag. You just unscrew it. The clip is there. It's this wire that you pull through. It's like a little tiny pill-looking thing. Unscrews.

It's got an iPhone charger. Plugs because the golf carts have a USB. And so there have been times when my phone's not going. Oh, my God. What am I going to do? I have a charger. Yeah. Dang, I can do business on the golf course.

Yeah, I agree. My wife is an excellent gift giver in that idea that she tends to listen to me all year round and just take notes. That's what she does. My wife, she doesn't punch me in that idea that she tends to listen to me all year round and just take notes. That's what she does. My wife, she doesn't punch me that day, so it's nice. Well, she probably knows the shelters are closed that night. It's funny.

It's weird, too, because she's Mexican. She's not all about Christmas. It's such a religious tradition. They're about that part, but no. Not the gift gift. Not the gift gift. Honestly, my wife, honestly, I have to go buy the kids stuff. What about the dinner, though, and all that other part of it?

Oh, the dinner, tamale season. Get inside for that. Yeah. We have a good, not Christmas Day. Christmas Day is whatever. Christmas Eve is the party between both families. Well, I'll say this. Let's see.

Leave room for dessert is the next one so just make sure you know so of all the stuff all the junk that comes out during the holidays is there anything like you get on that you're like i can't get off of tamales no so the number one thing that i do that i've it's been really helpful the last few years is i i keep my workout regimen the exact same regards to the day christmas day i still go to the gym yeah but it's the eating i keep mine the same too i just don't go i just don't go no no but because honestly you do feel like a sack of shit because you are eating a ton and losing every night and yeah it's like 365 days of the year i love that peppermint bark the white chocolate with the peppermint can't be around that stuff because i'll crush it i had three pieces of that already today and someone

sent it to me in a gift and it's over yeah well it had like a jar it was all these designer chocolates just client or whatever and one of the things had these peppermint chocolate things that's it and i just found myself a crush that i finished a lot i left and i finished them off yeah no it's done what about you colt is there anything that comes out strictly around the holidays i mean tamales i don't know dude i huge eggnog portion i'm i dig it i i drank eggnog last night i really i've only had half a glass i've had two glasses of eggnog this year and i've really let myself down so here's here's a funny story so when i was a kid my grandfather homemade homemade eggnog oh he would start making it. No, it was really good, but he would start making it right after Thanksgiving.

My grandmother, who was a complete teetotaler, had no idea what he put in it. He put bourbon in it. That's why grandpa's eggnog didn't taste as good as the poor one. So my grandmother would be drinking this eggnog all through Christmas and be a little half in the bag the whole time.

And like he'd go over and she'd be like, oh, the glass eggnog you're in. I have no idea because she was a super titan. All their kids were born in September. Yeah, pretty much. Pretty much. One time a year. Pretty much. Pretty much.

So yeah, that was always funny that he would sneakily get my grandmother drunk. I was born August 23rd. Yeah. Probably right about that time. Never put that together. A little Christmas miracle. A Christmas miracle. Yeah, I should like Christmas more than, huh? was born august 23rd yeah right about that time never put that together a christmas miracle i should like christmas more than uh you should yeah eggnog's half a glass top oh do you no you no you can't drink more than one glass in a sitting no no but you got yeah you you buy the

light eggnog because it's just half what no the light eggnog sucks so it doesn't taste you can't get a little bit pregnant if No. The light eggnog sucks, though. It doesn't even taste the same. Yeah, but there's like 400,000 calories. You can't get a little bit pregnant, Carl. If you're going to drink eggnog, you drink... But I'm saying there's literally 2,000 calories in a glass of real eggnog. You go right for the Southern Comfort brand, son. That's the one you drink.

That's the one you drink. So, yeah, 21... This has got to be you because I don't even know what this means. Celebrate La Noche Buena. Ooh. This has got... No? No? No, but I... because I don't even know what this means. Celebrate La Noche Buena. Ooh. No?

No. Many Latinx cultures across the world celebrate the good night on Christmas Eve with feasts from whole roast pig to hot noodle soup. I'm in. The evening often involves music, dancing, and even fireworks. That's what you do. Yeah, that's our thing. Well, this is Dominican Republic.

Ah, I see. Is this your big thing? Do you just not know what it's called? That sounds like a nice bowl of ramen. Cover all that. Ramen, so good. I like ramen. I was about to leave.

I got food poisoning off of pho once. It ruined my ramen. It's like hot water. There's chicken in it. It's like boiled in the soup. Okay, let me ask you a question. It was a worst. We drank hot water in Egypt.

Have you ever been that sick drinking hot water in Egypt? Stand corrected. I called it out. There you go. They brought out the pho, and with the chicken in it, we're the only ones in the restaurant, and everybody's like, it's a great restaurant, great restaurant. I go, that's food poisoning all over.

Of course, because I'm a fat ass. I'm like, I don't care. I'm still going to eat it. And yep, about eight hours later, that was a rough 48 hours. Oh boy. Oh boy. We won't talk about that. I love this one. Number 22, teach your kids about giving back. I think so much about Christmas becomes, what do I get? What do I get? What do I get? What do I get get and not enough of it is what do i give what do i get what i drop the ball on that one did you yeah i don't take my kids out to do stuff like that i candidly it's going to sound really selfish and i don't mean it to be because you know i give to charities as they come up and but that's just to send money um i get so busy around this time of year because everybody wants to close cases yeah this is the worst month for

me because i would love i love christ Christmas and I want to slow it down. It's already the 21st. I don't feel like it's December yet. It's already the 21st. I feel like there's things I have to do and I just have no time. So my problem is, because I'm looking after other people's lives

and interests too as a lawyer. Dude, I get it. And as a broker, you're worrying about other people's problems all the time. It's hard to be like, I'm going to carve a day out to go. No, no, no, no, no. But hang on.

Again, that's why my little system of giving out $100 a day. Yeah. I'm around my kids. I'm around my kids in restaurants and places where I can do that, and they can see us do that. Are those people? Yeah. They see that happening.

What's your concept of charity? There's this old Jack London quote that says, charity isn't giving a bone to the dog. It's giving a bone to the dog when you're as hungry as the book when you're as hungry as the dog okay so like charity isn't giving something when i'm not going to miss it or notice it real charity is giving something on myself that sure you know is difficult to give and that to me is time no i understand that i i do i do understand that but you know i think that when it comes to the the idea of giving things which is what christmas is so much about is the materialism and the you know i'm not going to go

into the material i don't divulge into a debate on capitalism because i'm a free market capital but when you really deal with the materialistic side of christmas it's good to teach your kids just you can give away as much as you get and it's it's better to give than it is to receive and to give that away and when you see the reaction of some of the people i mean you know some of the people are just like hey thanks a lot blah blah blah and some of the people you can tell are like it's a big deal when i hit him a hundred bucks yeah and that's the lesson it's an easy lesson i'll let the kids yeah half of americans people don't realize are living on you a paycheck away from disaster. Well, dude, case in point. So I idiotically bought the wrong tires for my Jeep when I had it.

This is like six months ago I did this. Because I ordered them online and I wasn't paying attention. And then they got shipped to the tire store. And then I took the Jeep there. And I didn't look at them before they put them on. And they put them on. And as soon as the Jeep came around, I was like, that doesn't look right. Turns out they were the wrong ones.

But as soon as they put them on, because I didn't check them, I owned those tires. So I had to buy more tires. So now I've got the new tires on my Jeep, but I have these brand new tires sitting in my garage. And, you know, me being me, hating to lose money. So first you put them up for like $50 less than I paid for them, $30 less. And, you know, six months later, I'm so sick of looking at them in my garage. I'm like, I don't want to do this anymore. So I throw them up on offer up over the weekend for $600.

Come get these damn tires, whatever. And a guy hit me up immediately. I came to the house. And this guy was like, man, I can't tell you how much I appreciate this. He was like, look, I mean, my tires are so bald. They're going flat. I just haven't been able to afford to buy new ones. And it's just been such a siege.

And with it being Christmas, and he's's like you just will never know how much this meant to me and i was like wow you know i don't even here i am thinking i'm getting something out of my garage and i'm helping this person in a way that was was profound it was really interesting thousand dollars worth of tires for six hundred fourteen hundred dollars worth tires oh yeah yeah fourteen hundred bucks for six for $600. So he was thrilled. I'm happy to have my garage back, and there you go. So acts of charity can come from the weirdest places that you don't necessarily expect to see them.

Or just reflections on it, appreciating what you do have. They don't always have to be a straight-up donation like that. It doesn't have to be that way. You hate when people just swap out gift cards for gift cards as presents. I tax my kids when they want to do that. Hayden came home and he's like, we did White Elephant at school and I wound up with three $10 gift cards to Starbucks. So you want to buy them off me?

I'm like, I definitely do. For $25. That was the number. He's like, whoa. I'm like, hey, man. Whoa. It's the juice, baby. Yeah.

It's not about getting what you want. You want to sell them, I'll buy them. But I ain't paying market value. You don't ever go to a check cash. I'm not. You think this is to sell them I'll buy them but I ain't paying market value you don't ever go to a check cash place you think this is juice I ain't no sucker buddy yeah learn that lesson now

build memories one gingerbread time and time I don't Roma's done a gingerbread house not something I do we've done them all we've done them make the place settings special

when you eat I mean you guys on Christmas day do you go out for a meal do you stay home nah we cook you cook I mean you guys on christmas day do you go out for a meal do you stay home we cook i mean by we mean not me yeah i have a real life angel the wife so she literally does all these caitlin does all these things i have place settings and christmas is done and all she's all about it she's taking care of it she wraps all the presents for the kids she buys all

the presents for the kids whatever i'm just like there's access to my bank account if i stay in vegas i go out the if i go to utah we do family things dinner i respect that um passed down family heirlooms i got man some of my most some of my most prized christmas possessions are when i was a kid my mom was very artsy so we made these little guys out of clothespins like wooden clothespins like there's a cowboy there's like a juggler there's a clown there's santa claus there's all just little clothespin people right and when my mom divvied up the christmas ornaments when we were kids i love my little clothespin people yeah it's like the best i love those so if you don't think little things like that cult are important or will matter to your kids later cult you know make that

investment and and make some stuff like that because when they're adults later in life, they will definitely appreciate it. Same thing. And go on with this one is, is, is we're matching jammies. I told my wife flat out when we got married,

I said, look, here's the deal. I'm never going to Disneyland and matching shirts. I'm never doing a matching Halloween. I'm just, I'm not, I'm not that guy to all go in the Gafford family reunion i'm not i don't do i just don't you find when it's corny

though on purpose intentionally the irony of being no i don't i find it i find it so incredibly nerve-grating what if i said to you john this is a cultism with me i understand let's say we're gonna take all three of our families to disneyland all together okay but we're all gonna wear jorts fanny packs new balance with high high pull-up dad socks. Okay, that's fine. See, that's fine because that's like dressing like going out all of us dressed like... A hat with a flat brim neon. Yeah, I'm in.

Hold on. I'm in. Are we talking shit on that? Because I wear jorts all the time. Making shirts that say like some obnoxious, descriptive family trip. Now back up, back back up back up because goes back christmas you just added a whole lot of layers of fun for me so you're like you're your love of absurdity yes it was far surpasses absolutely we supersede that now if you just say

we're all gonna wear the same shirt tomorrow the answer is hell no if it all said uh connell law i'll be all right no connell law solving all your problems here we. No. Connell Law. Solving all your problems. Here we go. 702 Connell. I'm not doing it. But I will say the jammies, man. If you have kids, we've done the jammies. And I was looking at those pictures, and they popped up on my memories. It's fun. And it was a nice memory.

I'm such a curmudgeon about pictures. I'm like, fuck off. I don't like my picture being taken. It was good. Then I see the pictures, and I'm always glad we took them. Took them. Yeah. The ugly Christmas sweater.

I got a couple. Do you? I think we have a couple too i don't i think that's a little played out it's played out it's played out i've never i think it's over actually i think i think when they started having companies when you go to cole's there's the ugly christmas company yeah and you go and they're really not funny anymore it was funny when they were actual just sweaters that some were dogs some company they were just terrible yeah and now they have like mr t banging a goat on them or something yeah what does this It was funny when they were actual just sweaters that some were dogs, some company was terrible. And now they have like Mr.

T banging a goat on them or something. What does this even mean? I got, I got some funny ones that, you know, kind of were funny at the time and they've lost it. I'm that person. If you invite me to ugly Christmas party,

I'm coming dressed normal. And if you got a problem, I'll just go home. Yeah. You throw a punch. I get it. Throat punch. Somebody come,

come give me a hug. See what I have. You know what? Five percent of Colts response. Yeah. I just throw a punch i get it throw a punch somebody come come give me a hug see what i have you know what 95 percent of colt's response yeah i just throw a punch yeah so remember if you can see colt between now and the new year you get a picture of you hugging him send it to me and your venmo and i will send you 20 bucks just because if anybody needs a damn hug during the holidays it's gonna be colt for sure give him for permission. He's from all of us here at the power move. Except for cold. Yeah.

From all of us here at the power move, except for cold. Uh, we genuinely wish you guys have a merry, merry Christmas with you and your family. Uh, and, and yeah,

man, and, and do some, create some new holiday traditions, go through some stuff you've done. Donate to the homeless kids. Go do some stuff, do some stuff.

And if, and if you got kids, man, you know, go balls out. Because if you don't, this is what happens. This is your fate. This is your future. This is like the ghost of Christmas future. Ghost of Christmas future.

You have heard your children in the future today on the podcast. If you don't do this. My life's freaking awesome. So every day is Christmas. Every day is summer solstice. Every day is summer solst Christmas. Every day is summer solstice. Every day is summer solstice. Every day is summer solstice. All right, guys.

Well, tune in next year. We're going to get back to our regular schedule. We'll do one show next week. It'll come out on Wednesday, and then we'll get back to our regular schedule of two shows a week going into the new year. Have a great Christmas, everybody. Merry Christmas. Happy holidays and all that. Merry Christmas.

Festivus for the rest of us. Festivus for us. Kwanzaa. K a great Christmas, everybody. Merry Christmas, happy holidays, and all that. Merry Christmas. Festivus for the rest of us. Kwanzaa. Kwanzaa. Joy. We're just getting to show your parting words, Colt. What are they for Christmas? Go ahead. My parting words? Yes. Again, donate to the less fortunate. Donate to the less fortunate. There you go. Don't end it on a high note, Colt. Don't be

moral. That's not a high note. Everybody else, stop being fake. If you don't like somebody, don't go say hi to them. That's what I'm talking about. There you go. There you go. 20 bucks a hug, send me your Venmo. Or a picture of yours.

How's Caroline? Hey, it's John Gafford. If you want to catch up more and see what we're doing, you can always go to thejohngafford.com where we'll share any links that we've,

things we talked about on the show as well as links to the YouTube where you can watch us live. And if you want to catch up with me on instagram you can always follow me at the john gafford i'm here give me a shout