Escaping the Drift with John Gafford - Resilience and Networking: Bek Lover's Journey from Finance to Podcasting Success

Episode Date: February 12, 2025

Back in the days when mega clubs like Exit and Tunnel ruled New York City's nightlife, I was just a college student trying to navigate the vibrant but costly world of music, art, and community. Those experiences taught me the power of networking, a skill that Bek Lover, our remarkable guest for this episode, has honed to perfection. Bek's journey from a finance career to podcasting stardom wasn't easy, but it was fueled by a deep appreciation for the resilience instilled in him as a first-generation Albanian American. Join us as Bek recounts how his family's resilience against oppressive regimes shaped his perspective on freedom and opportunity in America.   Our conversation with Bek takes a reflective detour into the realm of real estate and the need to prioritize local issues over international aid. We touch on the political climate in places like California and how emotional connections play a crucial role in both politics and sales. Bek shares invaluable insights on real estate investing, emphasizing strategies that avoid emotional attachment to property prices. Alongside, we explore the shifting dynamics of nightlife, where younger generations are redefining social habits by moving away from traditional alcohol-centric experiences.   As we continue, Bek opens up about his personal growth, focusing on the importance of leveraging networks for success and finding courage amidst fear. By turning personal pain into creative power, Bek's podcast has resonated with millions, inspiring stories of resilience and transformation. From the challenges of breaking away from unhealthy habits to the triumph of nurturing genuine connections, this episode is a heartfelt testament to embracing authentic paths. Bek's message is clear: take risks, embrace challenges, and discover fulfillment by aligning life with true values and passions.   CHAPTERS    (00:00) - Overcoming Adversity and Building Networks (08:56) - Real Estate Investing and Market Trends (17:06) - Diving Into New York Nightlife (26:23) - Leveraging Networks for Success (31:23) - The Future of Socializing and Nightlife" (34:27) - Life Lessons and Personal Growth (44:55) - Journey to Inspire and Overcome (54:51) - Finding Courage and Embracing Purpose   💬 Did you enjoy this podcast episode? Tell us all about it in the comment section below!    ☑️  If you liked this video, consider subscribing to Escaping The Drift with John Gafford  ************* 💯 About John Gafford: After appearing on NBC's "The Apprentice", John relocated to the Las Vegas Valley and founded several successful companies in the real estate space.   ➡️ The Gafford Group at Simply Vegas, top 1% of all REALTORS nationwide in terms of production. Simply Vegas, a 500 agent brokerage with billions in annual sales Clear Title, a 7-figure full-service title and escrow company.   ➡️ Streamline Home Loans - An independent mortgage bank with more than 100 loan officers. The Simply Group, A national expansion vehicle partnering with large brokers across the country to vertically integrate their real estate brokerages.   *************   ✅ Follow John Gafford on social media:   Instagram ▶️ / thejohngafford   Facebook ▶️ / gafford2   🎧 Stream The Escaping The Drift Podcast with John Gafford Episode here: Listen On Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/7cWN80gtZ4m4wl3DqQoJmK?si=2d60fd72329d44a9 Listen On Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/escaping-the-drift-with-john-gafford/id1582927283    *************   #escapingthedrift #beklover #networking #nightlife #newyorkcity #music #art #community #albania #resilience #freedom #opportunity #realestate #investing #markettrends #california #emotionalconnections #socializing #personalgrowth #podcasting #courage

If you're up against adversity, there is, it just takes like you heard how quickly this dude's life turned around. Never give up. It could turn around for you. It is Basie voice. Never give up. Never surrender. Never surrender. We will not go silently into the night.

And now escaping the drift, the show designed to get you from where you are to where you want to be. I'm John Gafford and I have a knack for getting extraordinary achievers to drop their secrets to help you on a path to greatness. So stop drifting along, escape the drift, and it's time to start right now. Welcome back to the program everybody. Today in the studio man, I got a banger for you. This is a dude that cut his teeth and became, I mean, impresario, is that a word we want to use? I mean, this is a dude that became a legend in the nightlife scene in New York city.

And just literally through that avenue, just, I mean, knows everybody on earth. It's crazy as I'm flipping through his face, I was flipping through his Instagram before he came on. I'm like, yep, no, that dude, that dude. Oh, there's Ted Donick. He's at a dinner at Craig's. Oh yeah. Okay. Yeah. No, that's, I mean, those, everybody knows everybody. And his ability to network and use that can only be dwarfed in reality by his ability to overcome some serious adversity he's had in his life.

So if you're somebody that is dealing with some issues, this dude's going to inspire you. If you're somebody that wants to understand how to grow your network and monetize that thing at a next level, this is the podcast for you today. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Studio This. This is Beck Leber. Beck, what's up, dude? What's going on, brother? It's good to be out here in Vegas, Super Bowl weekend. Yeah, man.

Nice to meet you. Beautiful office, man. Thank you. I appreciate that. Nice operation. Nice studio, man. I can tell you, you're serious about this. You know, some rinky-dink podcast or how I started. No. In the back of a room somewhere with you look at my first episodes you're like but see people don't understand that like you got to take risks in life. What's it yeah what's so you have the podcast so we're gonna get to all the backstory stuff in a second so your podcast too did you start for the same reason I did just to kind of build your network?

No. No? Why'd you start your podcast? I went through a very difficult time. I lost what I call my brother. Some people like to troll. It's sad, it's usually people that actually know me and know what I call my brother is my mom's brother, is my uncle.

He was 10 years older than me. If I was the prince of nightlife, he was the king of nightlife and I lost him in 2013. And even though I've been through many horrible things in my life, right? Like I'm a first generation Albanian-American, right? So I was born in the US, my family, you know, fought against communism in Albania and it was the most isolated country in all of, not just Europe, the world at one point, worse than North Korea today.

No one was ever allowed in or out. You would have never had Dennis Rodman playing basketball like he went to North Korea, or my friend Wally Green who went to play ping pong on an exhibition tour, fascinating person. No one was allowed in or out for 50 years. My grandfather and my great grandfather, Garesav Esso, fought to the last bullet. They didn't have no reinforcements, no nothing. The communists were supplied by the Soviets and the Iron Curtain. Unfortunately, my people were isolated from the world for a very long time. We have a very tragic history, our people. I think some of that's in embedded in our DNA

as Albanian Americans. We're very pro-American. And that's before communism took over because America actually saved Albania. Well, I gotta tell you, so my grandparents actually moved here from Hungary, from Budapest in the forties, right? My mother, first generation American, same thing.

And Americans that don't take for granted what we have in forties, right? My mother, first generation American Saint thing. And Americans that don't, that take for granted what we have in this country, right? It's disgusting. So a couple of years ago, we went to Budapest. We happened to be there. To me, Budapest is the most beautiful city in Europe. I love it. It's gorgeous, right?

So we're there and we happened to be there for Hungarian Independence Day. And I'm like, oh, sweet, this is going to be great. Right. Well, you hot dogs will be celebrations and all the stuff, dude. It was a million people walking down, which is essentially their shams to Lize, right. Walking to what's what's her square and dead silence. Like, and then you realize these people haven't been free that long.

Right. So when you walk by that, that they call it the museum of horrors where the Nazis occupied it and then the communists occupied it like, and like, like, yeah, my uncle got killed in there, right? Not like 200, 300 years of some generational thing. It's like, dude, this happened when I was a kid and I can remember this. And I think you're right. I think people that have that frame of reference

have a different understanding and love for this country. Second, third, fourth, fifth generation Americans do not realize the gift and the opportunity that they have. More importantly, they're falling into these traps of division which have galvanized both the left and the right and if we take the people out of it and just focus on the leaders of both sides

and our country here in America both have harmed this nation one side started war after war after war the other ones continued though, they didn't stop it either they continued financing these conflicts all around the world that were not beneficial to the American people at all. As someone that walked out of underneath the World Trade Center Plaza on the day it was attacked and saw those buildings collapse in front of his eyes and then told by George

Bush Jr. We're going to take out the tally, but here we are 24 years later, they're back in power, armed more than ever. We've been paying them. With our guns. Paying them billions of dollars. Forget just the arms that we have, the billions of dollars. So people on the right could say,

well, what was the right that started that side? And again, I leaned towards the right. Yeah. And then the left pushing ideology that's just against simple common sense focusing on one microscope of this entire nation which is that community that has like 50 different letters Yeah And putting everyone into echo chambers and then saying

this side is going to destroy this side and that side is going to destroy this side and divided our nation in half both sides are guilty for that and we are here sitting here on the precipice of one of the most critical, most dangerous times literally in American history where I've sensed that this literally this nation could have erupted into open conflict like what you saw in Yugoslavia, which you've seen in other places where society collapses. Like people don't realize how fragile society is

until it's not anymore. And that's what's scary as a first generation American, as someone, I swear to God, was so proud to be American, man. Like when I would go to Europe, I would hold my head up high. And now I'm ashamed, bro. I'm embarrassed, not because of my fellow brothers

and sisters, but because of these leaders that have used our name, have used our goodwill, have used our sweat to do things that not only hurt the world, but have hurt us as Americans. And we need to wake up, man. It's like every four years, we have the choice between Coke or Pepsi,

and we're diabetic. Well, I think you got water sitting in the White House right now with what's going on, with the Musk and Do Well, I think you got water sitting in the White House right now with, with, with what's going on with the Musk and Doge. I think. I listen, I like a lot of what they're doing. I like a lot of what they do. I'm just talking in general up until this point where we are today. I agree, but I think it's getting harder for, for some of these, like for example, this morning and I never, I do, I almost never talk politics on the show, but this morning I saw something that was so insane to me that was crazy, which was on all the news channels

this morning, you had Maxine Walters and some other Democratic representative standing outside the Department of Education, like demanding to get in as some kind of weird protest to the Doge cuts. But my thing was like, what are you gonna do if they let you in? Like what?

Like this is all just a dog and pony show and it's, it's going to be such a ridiculous dog and pony show. Cause I don't know anybody in America. Like I literally don't know anybody that I know on both sides of the aisle that is not seeing obviously my friends on the left are a little quieter about some of it, but I don't know anybody that's seeing some of the cuts they're making and some of this insane stuff that's been getting spent. They can go, well, you know what, wait a second,

I think that might've been a good idea. We need to send that money out of here. Like you being from Albania, let me ask you this, because this is a good question for you. Seeing what an impoverished country or knowing what an impoverished country can be like. The poorest country in Europe. So now that you're at one point.

So this is a great question for you because now you're in, now you're, you love America. It's great American citizen, but you know how the other world is. It is my opinion. And this is just my opinion. And again, my frame of reference is born, raised, lived here, everything else that we should not send $1 to any other country on this planet until every single veteran in this country is taken care of. I fully agree, number one.

And number two, until we pay off our debt. Yeah. On top of that. But I have family that served in Iraq. Shout out to Brian, okay? He's like my brother, Brian from Dallas, two tours in Fallujah, Albanian-American, born and raised, right? We're Brian from Dallas, two tours in Fallujah, Albanian American, born and raised.

We're very proud to be a part of American society, but we're not proud of the last 20 years, man. I'm ashamed, bro. We're worried about some of the most ridiculous things right now. Why are we worried about half of, I'm not saying that a minority should not be heard or have rights.

I'm not even, like like I believe because we guarantee everyone the right to pursue happiness or whatever, that's great, and private matters, like your private parts and what you wanna do with them should be a private matter. Why are you pushing this on children? People like Gavin Newsom, I'll call him out all day. You're worried about children in California

chopping off their weewees. Why don't you worry about Skid Row? Why don't you worry about all the homeless? Why don't you worry about the fires? Why don't you worry about having water in your Why don't you worry about all the homeless? Why don't you worry about the fires? Why don't you worry about having water in your hydrants? There's no excuse for that. The most taxed state. California is the most beautiful state in our nation.

It's run like garbage. My heart aches for these people, but if they're gonna keep electing that, I don't feel bad for them. I gotta sit there and say, I really don't feel bad for you guys at all. Zero. Well, the megaphone gets louder

the further out from the middle it gets. But this is a person who shut your businesses down in 2019. Who sat there and looked in the cameras and said, we were outdoors while he kept people out of business while big box stores could stay in business. They ravaged our lives. The truth is out of the bag. Even the CIA is confirmed.

Yes. So all of us crazy people that wear tinfoil hats, we're not looking so crazy, but you're looking really stupid right now. No, I think- Those of you that just can't wake up, wake up. But I think the reason that he's getting elected is because the ideology of social importance,

social matters, like you discussed, is so embedded- That's how they sell it. Is so embedded- They sell that. From a young age to the people that live there that that's more important than the practical sense practicality things that you need to do. That's exactly what they do.

They're hitting an emotional point, which is a sales tactic, right? Sure. Because emotion will override logic nine out of 10 times. For certain personality types, yes. A lot. But the key is when you can find that emotional bond because when you're with a client who shows no emotion,

the master will find, cause everyone has a bum brother. Everyone has a button, whether you have a driver in the seat that you're trying to pitch or whatever, you got to find that out. And that that's always been my strategy. I always believe the sales made in the warmup, bro. It's not in the presentation. It's not in the price, not the product at all. It the presentation. It's not in the, it's not the product at all. It's never the product, in my opinion. It's never the product.

It's finding what makes this person tick and how can I attach that to this product. Well, there's a very different, well, how do you think, what do you think about this and how do you feel about this are two very different questions. And you gotta know when to play those cards based on who you're talking to.

And if you do it wrong, you're gonna have a very, very angry customer. Yeah, you ask a super analytical client, how do you feel, you're going to have a very, very angry customer. Yeah, you ask a super analytical client, how do you feel about this? He's like, I don't care. I feel about the numbers. Tell me it sucks.

You're going to have a very angry customer. Yeah, I was in a meeting the other day and somebody asked me how I felt about something. I said, it doesn't matter how I feel. The market tells me it sucks. That's exactly what I said. The market is telling me this sucks. It's not any good.

And the price you're asking is absurd. Doesn't matter how I said. The market is telling me this sucks. It's not any good. And the price you're asking is absurd. It doesn't matter how I feel. I'm in the process of liquidating a property in a very, very high desirable area. And I think my price is very fair, but it's not moving. So I'm gonna have to drop the price, man. Yeah. Dude, listen, that's what we talk about.

Every time I tell anybody go into listing presentation for real estate, I would say the same thing. Yeah, dude, that's listen, that's what we talk about every time. Every time I tell anybody go to a listing presentation over real estate, I would say the same thing. Never marry yourself as an agent to the price. Never do that. Right. You've got to explain to people that this is how the markets work. If we put it on the market, as long as an agent does their job and exposes it worldwide with high quality marketing, that pictures look great. Images look great. 360 tour, all the things, all the things you're supposed to do if nobody

shows up you're 10% off if people show up but nobody writes an offer your 5 to 7 what about if you get three offers but they fall through an attorney review because either a they didn't get financing should you stay at that price so if I got three offers that let's say 1.5 stay where you are and it's only been publicly on the market for a week be patient Yes, stay where you are. Don't move it because he dropped and you look desperate. No, no, don't move it. Leave where you are So offers were made privately. Yeah, but they fell through a one that attorney spooked them I mean, it was full disclosure, but you you said yes, and I worried about your attorney says it was a rent control property

It was nothing hidden from the perspective client. It was like, hey, this is rent control, but there's some ways you can maneuver and do what you gotta do. The right landlord is what to do. I did the same thing when I brought the property. My rents were $800 for a two-bedroom in North New Jersey. You understand? I love how there's no New York exit at all

until you start talking about rent controlled pricing. And I got them out. Bam, there it is. I got them all out legally. I got them out and then guess what? I renovated and increased the rent by 50%. The new owner can do the same thing. Like these people don't have vision

or they're trying to low ball. It's an investment property. It's not a place I live in or would live in. But if you got three offers in the first week, bro, stay the course. Yeah, I think we're under priced, but I think because of mortgage rates and how high they went,

I should be getting much more, in my opinion. It's a four family, brother. With two bonus units in the back. Yeah. That are not legal, but there's ways you can do things. Listen to the market, my man. I thought we were getting offers, the market's telling you you're right,

where you need to be. And as long as you got room to work. You've been in real estate, though? No, it's for 20 years. I got in and out when I was young. That's how I actually started my career in sales. I started, you know what's funny, man? In commercial leasing in mid time,

I had no idea what I was doing. I was terrified. I was in the nightclub business, right? And at 27, I had bleeding ulcers. Now here in- No, no, no, no, this was in Atlanta, actually. I was, remember Super Bowl 2000 in Atlanta where Ray Lewis got in that trouble?

That was my club. Yeah, Cobalt Lounge. And anyway, I- Refresh our memory on that? What happened there? So we had that week, Super Bowl was in Atlanta. We had the NFL Pro Player Party. We had the Playboy Party.

We had the Maxim Party. We had everything. Esquire Magazine said we were the number one club on the East Coast of the United States, pole to pole. Miami to New York, they said Cobalt Lounge were the number one club on the East coast of the United States, pole to pole. Miami to New York, they said, Cobalt Lounge was the number one club. It was banging.

We were doing incredibly well. By 1999, 2,000 steps. I mean, this is before heavy bottle service and all of this. Yeah, that's right. When we took off, because even in New York City, it changed. There was massive nightclubs like Sound Factory, Lime Light, Tunnel, and then they all went

down when Giuliani did his crackdown and cleaned up New York and Peter Gatien was exiled to Canada. No, he came to Atlanta and opened Limelight in Atlanta. I know, but he was forced out of America at one point completely. He was not allowed to come back in. And then it went to the lounge era, which was, instead of having 2,000 people in a club, you had two, 300 people, but they gotta pay their rent, right? So that's when bottle service. And also the drugs changed, right? People were doing ecstasy where you wouldn't mix it with alcohol.

So if you go look at the videos of Nightlife back then, that's why they charged you 100 to get in. And you'd pop your pill and stay up for three days, dancing and drinking water and hopefully you don't fall into a K hole. I thank God never got involved in narcotics. And that's why I lasted as long as I did in nightlife. I did used to drink and I was a pretty heavy drinker. Well, let's, let's, okay, let's talk about nightlife.

Cause let's get back to that. Cause we've kind of been all over the border a little bit. Sorry. Scattered brain. Well, here's the thing, dude, you, you notice on the desk, if you've ever watched this, I have no list of questions. We just have a conversation. So it's just like, I met you at a bar. We're talking here. They're watching. They're with us. Yeah, exactly.

Cause I think that's just more, I think that's better. I better conversations do it this way than if I said, I think it's just more organic and it's, it's not forced, man. It is. It is. So tell me about your nightlife, how you got it in nightlife. So I started going out when I was 17 and the first nightclub I ever went into that I remember was Exit. This place was, today it's called Terminal 5,

they do concerts in there. I mean this place was massive. And this is when you had like, you know, the New York DJs were like local celebrities, man. You had people like Jonathan Peters, you know. you had, um, uh, there's just so many of them. Um, my brain's a little fried right now. I'm trying to wake up. No, you're good. Uh, what's his face? I want to give him a shout out because I know he follows me too. He's huge. Um, whatever you had all these amazing DJs, right? And in those days people would walk into a nightclub. What year is this? We're talking

the mid to late 90s, but I started going out in the late 90s. I caught the end of the mega club era in New York City. So the end of tunnel, the end of limelight. Exactly, I caught that end. So I got to see these places, Sound Factory was crazy. So you would walk in Friday and literally come out Monday. It was insane. And people would just dance. It was all about dancing and it was out Monday. It was insane and people would just dance. It

was all about dancing and it was very organic. It was, you know, brother, the Italians, the Albanians, the Russians, the Jew, everyone was in there, man. You know, you had, you know, alternate lifestyle people, right? You had the LGBT, if that's what they called them back then, they were in there. You had the club kids and it's like what I loved about it, man, it was like, it was the only environment at that time where everyone got along. Yeah. Right?

What was the progressive trance days? You'd have straight people dancing next to Gabe. Everyone just was there for the music, for the art. It was very organic, man, and it was addictive, you know? You just felt like you were a part of this special family, and the only thing that would change throughout the week, you would pretty much see the same people, it would just be the vendors.

So you were just going out, or were you promoting door, what were you doing? I didn't really promote in the beginning. I was more of a socialite man. My brother was the king man, Nicky, God rest his soul. So, you know, we went out and then I start college in the city, I went to Pace University. I'm a college kid, York City, I don't have a campus,

but New York City is my campus. So I started going out. He takes me to a very famous lounge called Lot 61. And Lot 61 was on 21st Street on the West Side. Terminal now? No, that was exit. Exit. This is now when the lounge era begins. Okay. So Amy Sacco, who's a legend, she actually had a place I think out here too, and on Colorado she had a place too, but she was the queen of nightlife. And she opens up this lounge called Lot 61. And then she also opened a very famous place called Bungalow 8, which was mentioned in many songs of hip hop.

If you listen to the infamous Diddy Monday night, we go to bungalow 8. That's in one of his songs when they're singing about New York and nightlife. I said I actually met Diddy at Lot 61. He had released an album called We Invented the Remix and it was also Buster Rhymes' birthday. And this is when Buster Rhymes had his ponytail from his head all the way down to his ankles. And actually, coincidentally, the reason I ended up meeting him was this girl I knew was working for Jacob the jeweler before he was like really famous. Yeah.

Like really, really famous, like where he was like a household name. And she was like, hey, it's Tuesday, like I need, I heard you have juice at last 61 cause it was impossible to get in that place. And the manager was Albanian, shout out Benoka, shout out Ben, and shout out Mateus.

Shrugs so deep. Shout out Mateus. Is it racist? Like I, cause I'm a white dude with Hungarian roots. I can't get in, but the Albanians look out for each other. I mean, listen, you wouldn't have a, I need DEI initiatives laid out at these clubs. They do believe me. They give them preference.

So we get to the front of this club brother and she's like, please, you got to get me in. I work for this guy named Jacob and I got to hand out his cards. And so we go, I get to the door. You can't see the door. Like I had never seen a place like that. I was like completely like every rapper on earth at that time. And this is like, in my opinion, the heyday of hip hop. Like when it became like real mainstream, right?

And I walk in there, I'm the only white boy in there with a suit and every rapper I ever and this is before like Google. I kind of like Google how someone looked or didn't look or whatever, you know? And I'm sitting next to Black Rob, God rest his soul, the guy that had the song, like, whoa, ba na, ba na, ba na, ba na, like remember that song?

Dude, I'm laughing at this, because when you're done, I lived the same story. I don't have a lot of money, I'm a college student, I just got a credit card. I maxed the credit card out. I buy champagne. I buy this. Champagne was only $80 a bottle for Moet. Today, I cannot believe some clubs in New York charge $800 for a regular,

not a Magnum, a regular bottle of Moet. I mean that was Cristal pricing back in the day. And that's what they were drinking back then. You never even hear Cristal anymore, right? It's Don Cristal. I don't drink. I haven't drinking over a decade, but it switched to tequila now, which is because in our day it was vodka, right? Everyone was pushing the vodka and hypnotic and all those crazy weird drinks. Make the story short, brother, because we have a lot to talk about. Puffy's dancing on the table. Everyone's in there, every one of their mother. And I see this guy Black Rob. I don't know how

he looked. I knew his song because it wasn't like I could just Google. This is before, you know, smartphones and Puffy's dancing and he's like, you see that mother F? I'm like, yeah, he's like, I hate that mother F. I'm like, what do you mean? So I can't make no money because of that mother. Those were his exact words, bro. And he just passed away, I think, like a year and a half ago. Irv Gaudi just died. I used to play basketball with Irv Gaudi. I think it was on Thursdays. They would go to Chelsea Piers. This is when Murder Inc. was huge, which just died. I used to play basketball with briefly managing Takashi. I haven't seen him in over 20 something years, he was actually shot in front of me. That was when I was like, you know what, I think I'm done hanging out with the hip hop crowd.

Us Albanians, we need to stay away from that type of stuff. So yeah, man, nightlife. Well, dude, I want to tell my, so Cobalt on Sunday nights, we had Jermaine Dupree from So So Def would throw an event every Sunday night at our club. So every single rapper came nights, we had Jermaine Dupree from So So Def would throw an event every Sunday night at our club. So every single rapper came to, you need water?

Dude, well, yeah, yeah, yeah, good, good, brother, keep going. Every single rapper on the planet was through that place on Sunday nights. And so, yeah, I did the same, had the same stuff and all of our security guys that worked there were all XD1 athletes, huge dudes. Unfortunately, that genre, it does,

it does, it's cause of the music, man. You don't see that type of violence in house music. You really don't. But here's the thing. It was never, we never had a problem with violence with the people that were in the club. We had a problem with violence, people were outside. As soon as they got outside, yeah.

No, no, no, no, people that couldn't get in. Oh, that couldn't get in. Because we had a very, at Cobalt, we had a very, it was interesting, man. We had a very strict dress code, right? Like you couldn't come in and wear like that couldn't get in. Because we had a very, at Cobalt, we had a very, it was interesting, man. We had a very strict dress code, right? Like you couldn't come in and wear like, you're standing hip hop attire. Now, obviously, if little John rolled up,

we're letting him in. Yes, he's a celebrity. But we're not letting his entourage in unless they're dressed. So it got to be known, right? And it was always the problem outside. But there was times where like, I would go out with all of our security guys and they would take me to this place called the Gold,

the Gentleman's Club club downtown in Atlanta. It was my first experience in a black strip club. Never been on one since. That doesn't want to went to, but dude, it would walk in and I was the only white dude there. And it was just like, it was wild being out with us. They were like unicorn. No, no, no, no. They knew me. They called me cobalt. That's what they would call like the DJ would give me a shout out.

What's up cobalt in the house. And I was like, cause Sunday night everybody wanted to get in. And it was just like, it was, so yeah, I lived that life too. And I look back on it fondly, but I don't miss it. I saw a lot of people go by the wayside and nightlife, right? So they let the excesses, you know, I lost friends who, who did heavy drugs, who drank a lot of people died drunk driving. friends who did heavy drugs, who drank, a lot of people died drunk driving. So for me,

what really brought me in and what I loved about the nightlife as I started to get juice, right? You know, the power to get into these places and I'm underage, brother. I wasn't even of legal age when I was a socialite, but I looked older and I wore suits always. I wore suits since literally high school and they made fun of me in high school I was aware of three-piece suit no why do you always dress up so well I said cuz I might meet the president and I don't want to look like you you don't know who you're gonna meet today and I was always dressed I literally best dressed in the yearbook and voted most likely to have his own talk show well I guess it came true there you go dude you know it's

funny man I was looking back just randomly. It, I don't even know why somebody posted like my eighth grade, ninth grade yearbook or eighth grade yearbook online from my hometown and I'm flipping through it. And I got voted most accident prone and not most likely to succeed. And I'm looking back on that. I'm like, yeah, maybe need a recount on that one.

Eighth grade Lake City junior high school in Florida. Yeah, might need a recount on that one. Eighth grade, Lake City, junior high school in Florida. Yeah, might need a recount, there it is. But let me ask you this. So you were getting so connected and it's so easy to get connected now with the gram, right? Everybody does it. If this was out back then, my God. Like people don't really,

like I just wish people that are 25 right now understood what it was like to be connected in that way before the world of Instagram. How did you build your network? Was it all just text messages, phone numbers? It was all talking, man. It was all business cards, you know. Back then you couldn't even text really either. It was just... Trying to get someone's cell phone number and talking. So, you know, there's a couple parts to this. I think it's important. I wanna teach your audience something they need to do. If you're young, you don't realize it.

Cause in their minds, they think like, well, what can I offer? I have nothing to offer these people. How do I go talk to this big shot? You know, I don't know how to network. Cause networking is everything. You know that. It can change everything.

And the problem is when you're young, you might be meeting some of these people and you don't know what to offer them. You don't know how to entice them. You don't know how to even start a conversation with these people. And remember these people at that level are being bombarded every five seconds. Yeah. So the first thing is to not ask them for something, right? What can you offer them?

And very quickly, right? Or leveraging other connections you have, because maybe you don't have something that's of interest to them, but you can figure out someone you know has something of interest to them. So the first thing is this, you should be talking to everybody.

When you're under the age of 25, you are building your network. This device, your phone, has a place where you can write notes. I met Billy Bob at a bar at the Rich Carlton Hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada. Bill has two kids named John and Gene or whatever. He's in computer chips.

You're not even in that industry, but 10 years from now you might be. And now someone goes, hey man, I really need computer chips. 10 years from now, I need computer chips, man. I don't know, let me see you type in the word computer chip on your contacts, it'll pop up everyone in that industry. Now you can call them and say, hey man, do you make these type of chips?

Now this is 10 years later. If you can store the data and have intention with what you're doing, because every second counts and we don't learn this until we hit our 40s and we're like, oh my God, what did I do? I wasted, my greatest regret in life is how much time I wasted and not having intention. But if you can't figure out what you want to do, at least you can start building your network. It doesn't mean you have to use it now. That's always going to be there if you know how to build it and cater to it.

So you type in those notes, now you're taking 10% off a video of someone you met 10 years ago. That is your wealth. Your network can change your life in seconds. One move, one connection. So what I would always do is try to do some homework on who I'm trying to meet or target. This is a lot easier to do today. You can Google someone in five seconds. You can literally read a whole synopsis of their life in seconds and then approach them and say, hey man,

you know how many times I've done that? Someone high profile. I've never watched any of their crap. I Google, hey man, I'm a big fan of boom boom boom. By the the way I know you come to New York and if you ever need anything in New York I got this venue they do this. He's like actually yeah we throw parties and once in a while brother even if you don't you just want to send someone from your entourage you know it just depends who you're talking to and what might be of interest to show him wow this guy's cool he's not bothering he's not asking me for a picture he he's offering me something, you know? And then you deliver.

I think you just, the number one thing you just said was that you can offer, as somebody that's 22, 23 years old, that if you're like, what can I offer? You know, I think what you had, you mentioned earlier, was you had a lot of juice at the clubs in New York. So you could walk up to anybody. I used to go out with Tracy Morgan. And say, where do you want to go?

I can get us in anywhere in two seconds. And it's that ease of access. That gets there. That costs you no money. It costs you no effort. You just have to be cool with it. The clubs happy that they're there. Yeah. The bottles are put on the table. I delivered. They have a good time. They think you're the man. That's okay if we're talking about nightlife, but it doesn't have to be just nightlife. I know. But what I'm saying is, what I'm saying is people think they have to have time. That's okay if we're talking about nightlife, but it doesn't have to be just nightlife, right? I know, but what I'm saying is,

what I'm saying is people think they have to have something tangible that they create that brings value. Or if you wanna be in nightlife, make a lot of friends that are girls. Yeah. And take them out and you'll be paid to hang out with them. But see- Which I think is a joke. I don't consider that promoting.

And unfortunately, that's how a lot of New York operates and Vegas and Miami. To me, that's not promoting, you're not a promoter when I used to throw an event to three thousand people would show up I had no sub promoters. That's promoting there's videos online. You can go look at them all day That to me is a promoter someone that brings money my friend. Mm-hmm. Okay pain clubs pain to create image tables I'm not saying that you did this in yours I'm saying I know for a fact that this is how the system works to create image tables. I'm not saying that you did this in yours. I'm saying I know for a fact that this is how the system works. They pay, you know how you know you're a promoter table?

Atmosphere models or whatever? It's Frank Sinatra syndrome, man. Create the whole environment, because you're creating an environment to lure in the whales, because you know you're going to make it up on the whales. So if I give out $300 worth of bottles to get 100, 200 people to drink, then now I'm going to try to, I'm putting bait, I'm chumming the water to try to bing in the whale so I can bang them out for five bottles, 10 bottles. We had one state, we didn't do atmosphere models back then. We did have one state. Image tables.

No, what we did was the girls, all the girls that danced at the Gold Club, which was Golarity's Club in Atlanta that went down to that huge sting. But if you worked at the Gold Club, it was well known that if you came to our bar, you drank for free. Like we would set you up, whatever you want. If you can, if you, and I'm not if you came to our bar, you drank for free. Like we were, we would, we would set you up whenever you want. If you can, if you, and I'm not using the word to control them,

but if you can bring the women to your venue, that's all you need. You don't need men will go to the same place every single night. If they know they have a chance to meet a beautiful, that's what they're out for. They're out to drink and meet a woman and hopefully have a good ending to their night. My very first place that I had any ownership in was when I was 20 years old I was still a student at Florida State and I don't know these guys had a bar and they didn't know what they were doing and They were going under and they just as a Hail Mary. They said hey come in and take it over

We'll give you a third of it because it was like they were going out either. Just fill it. Yeah, just fill it So the first thing I did was I they had all these girls that were working there, all these girls that were the bartenders and everything else. I got rid of all of them. And I hired all my fraternity brothers that were super face men and super good looking dudes. And because those guys brought in all the girls

and then the girls brought in everybody else. It was like a reverse. Yeah, it was a reverse. But see guys will go to a knitting school. They don't care. They'll go to a knitting class if there's beautiful women there. They don't care. I'll go to a knitting class if there's beautiful women there. They don't care.

I agree. It doesn't matter. And that's why, and a lot of these venues during that time weren't that nice. It was because all the beautiful women were going there. Yeah. And then the celebrities want to go there. And then the rich people want to go there

because they have the money to spend to get in there and they don't care. They want to be in the environment. And then page six writes about it. And then, and that's all it really took. But as the real estate prices have increased in New York City, it's become extremely difficult to operate a successful have increased in New York City has become extremely difficult to operate a successful I don't know how you can.

It's ridiculous actually and This generation the bottle world is I think it's finally over. Is it going up? It's all because of the festivals The other generation will go pound two cases of White Claws Papa hit a Mali and then go to a festival at the Brooklyn Mirage. But I think even more, I think this next generation coming up, I think you're gonna see alcohol decline crazy. I mean, my son is 17, right?

He's 17. Alcohol is, listen. It's going out, I think. It destroys lives, brother. Let's be real. A lot of lives. By the time I was 17, dude, it was every Friday, Saturday night, we were out getting after it, right?

When I was 17, 18 years old. And now my son's like, nah, not for me, not my thing. Smart kid. Not my thing. He's not losing nothing. But I don't think he's a unique kid. That doesn't mean you still can't go out and have fun. I know he's, but he does.

And it doesn't mean you still can't go to these venues. I'm always sober and I actually have more fun now. I'm like, man, these people, you sit there and watch the show, if you know what I mean. But I think also there's other things coming out, like the whole mushroom thing that's coming out. I drink Cava. Okay, yeah, yeah, that.

Cava, Cratom tea is nice. If you get not this powder crap, you get the actual leaf and you make it tea. It has a very calming effect. Blue Lotus tea is awesome. And these things actually make you feel nice, but you don't lose cognition. You don't lose control of yourself.

A lot of people can't handle alcohol and make fools of themselves or they hurt people, they hurt themselves, man. Alcohol is like, listen, you've seen it. You're in night life, man, I don't have to tell you. Fights, women, they're sloppy, they're men, they wouldn't have done it if they were sober, they were entertaining another man,

then a fight breaks out, stuff like that happens. I just think, think about like cigarettes, right? Like by the time my kids have kids, my grandkids are gonna look at people that smoke cigarettes like they're out of their minds. Yeah, I'm out of my mind right now, bro, trust me. I relapsed into cigarette smoking after 12 years. Ah!

Gotta get off it. I'm going through a very stressful time. Gotta get off it, man. I lost 70 pounds. Good for you. I'm done, God willing, I'm getting very close. It's lost 70 pounds. Good for you. I'm done. God willing, I'm getting very close. It's a hard habit.

It is, dude. It's a very hard habit. I used to do the same thing. And I love cigars. I should just go back to cigars. Yeah, I was the same, dude, when I was in nightlife, I was the same thing, smoke and smoke and smoke. Love cigars, man.

So how did you go 12 years? Were you like the, like, people used to smoke heavily. Well, I don't drink alcohol, right? It's very hard to quit smoking cigarettes if you drink. But didn't people used to smoke heavily. Especially now. Well, I don't drink alcohol, right? It's very hard to quit smoking cigarettes if you drink. Because they go with a guy. Yeah, they do. But didn't you become like the worst non-smoker?

Like, I know I'm the guy in the casino that's like, ah, ah, at the people next to me. I'm like the worst. I was, the Albanians, man, we're born in smoke. Oh, that's true. You used to ride around in the car with the windows up on a hot, on a cold day of smoking. I've seen them smoking while they're pregnant over there, man.

Not all of them, but I was in the villages You know, they don't give them don't light a cigarette practice going just go easy. We got these big heads, you know, I love it All right, so Obviously use that relationship to build that cloud in grew that so yeah Important question that What makes you likable because we all see that guy everybody sees that dude in the club? That's that guy in the sees that dude in the club, that guy in the bar that everybody's gravitating to.

These people can't stand me at first. No, no, but what makes, my question is, what gives you that swag? What's the thing? Humor, brother. If you had to teach it. Humor, all right? There's no quicker way, I think,

in business and relationships, if you can make some, well, there's two ways, right? I don't recommend this to amateurs. in business, in relationships, if you can make some, well there's two ways, right? I don't recommend this to amateurs. So they can get slapped, they can listen to this and get smacked, here it comes. Make them laugh or make them cry, either way, they will buy. It's learning how to use emotion

and to pull it out of people also. I'm not saying to manipulate, but to just be real, man. Like if you can make someone laugh or feel your raw emotion you know i'm just very i'm just very straightforward like i'm just this is who i am i've been through some hard things in my life i'm not a piece of crap i am a man of my word and i have references i said after a while when you're building your network and what's amazing i was like they could see who's connected to who right like i can I can go with someone. Hey, and now, and it starts to snowball.

Why does, you know, why does this person follow? Why, and it just starts snowballing, man. And then like, hey, you need a reference? Go talk to this person. You need a reference? Go ask them. Go ask them what kind of man I am. Social proofing.

Yeah, go ask them what kind of man I am. Do I keep my word or not? You know, and I think it's so hard to find people like that, man. That actually keep their word, bro. It's so, okay, to me, those people, you don't trade them for nothing. That's what I understand. All the people that lost me in their life, not even because they didn't keep their word, but backstabbing for no reason. And that's when you start to understand that there's no logic to jealousy and envy. It's a very evil emotion that there's no logic to it. You know, people can be jealous of you, man. You don't even know it. You know, the, you know, the thing that, that,

that I kind of came to realize the thing that I came to realize that will make you immune from all of that shit is this is anytime somebody does something insane or acts in a way that is nuts to me, I just remind myself, I'm not the main character in their little movie, right? I'm not even the best supporting actor. I'm like one of those NPCs or whatever in a video game. I am irrelevant. They see things the way they do.

Why am I gonna let what their little movie dictate how I feel about something? I'm in my own little movie over here. I'm talking about people you know, people you've helped, people that are part of your life when they ram a knife in your back. I look at it the same way. I could get it. I could get it. If there was five or 10, listen, I could understand.

And I'm not saying it's right, but at least there's some logic to, Hey, if I screw over back, I'm making $10 million on this. Let's just say, right? Yeah. Okay. The greed got to them. Maybe they never seen that Let's just say, right? Yeah. Okay, the greed got to them. Maybe they never seen that kind of money. It changes their life. Okay, cool. But to the people that all you did was help and you never hurt them. But that's your perception. And you never betrayed them. Right. I do. What I'm saying is, and then they burned the bridge. Ever since things have popped off. My phone, people have been trying to get in touch with me. I haven't spoken to me in years. Why all of a sudden? Now you want to know me? Why?

Because when you scroll left and right you're seeing me everywhere. Hey bud I miss you. No you don't miss me. You weren't there when my brother died. You didn't call to see if I was even alive. Yeah. Okay there's people I went when their brothers died. I spent, I almost lost my job. One of my long-distance cousins lost his brother tragically. I almost got fired because I saw how bad he was hurting and I was never even close with him like that. I was like you know what? He needs someone. So I called out of work. I was working for Chase Bank at the time. This is 20 something years ago. Four days in a row I called

out and said like listen you're about to lose your job. I said well fire me then. I don't care. It's a tragedy. I don't care. I was willing to lose my job to give emotional support to someone that's blood distant, but still blood. Yeah Same thing happens to me. He never even called me man He never even called to see how I'm doing or if I'm okay, and you know who you are if you watch this So but now they all want to come and hang out, bro You know everything has a blessing even the most tragic events in our life once the dust settles Because your heart's swollen man, and you go through these dark times in your life, right? And they will come.

I don't care who you are. It's only a matter of time before you lose something that you can't replace. Well, here's the thing. Like you gotta let that shit go. You can keep score. You can keep score. It's hard, right? When you're traumatized, you lose someone in a car accident, unexpected, brother.

You weren't expecting the blow, right? It's a lot more dangerous in a fight, right? When you're not looking and you get sucker punched, right? You can get killed like that, right? So when you know something bad might happen, it's different, but when it comes unexpected, sometimes these things happen to us. We have, you know, I believe the game board of life is rigged as a creator. You couldn't control to who you were born, or when you were born.. So to say, well I have control of everything, no you were inserted into this simulation that God created to test us on His terms. If I lived in Iraq or Syria could I control the wars that broke out? I could have been the most positive person in the world, that's why I don't believe in the law of attraction. Okay, I believe in

positive thinking, I believe in trying to find some hope always. I love that train of thought, but to sit here and say that we always attract everything. Some of that can be true, but not to the point where it's a universal law. You know, you got to be careful and use the word law. If I was in Syria, I could have been the most positive person in the world. Yeah, you're still going to have a land. And the war starts. I lose everything. What did I do? Or I'm in LA, my house, everything burned to the ground, my family died. I didn't start that fire, I didn't attract that fire.

So what I'm saying is, I believe the game board is rigged. How we respond to these events that we have no control over is our salvation, is our free will. But don't you also believe everything happens for a reason? And I do believe in divine wisdom, which means sometimes you don't know until looking backwards. Yeah. I mean, you know, you talk about changing your life and we're getting, we're gentlemen of a certain age

where, you know, now something happened to one of us, there's not gonna be a candlelight vigil down at the schoolyard. You know, if someone's out there hurting, man, I just want them to know, like, listen, when you get hit, and I didn't think things would ever get better. When I lost Nicky, I didn't think I could ever live again, man.

I really didn't. Like it took me years, brother, years. Everywhere was a memory. Everywhere was a place, you know, every song, every thing. I got so bad. I tried to move to Texas. I thought I could run away from the pain. So, well, if I get out of New York, because he was the king of this city

I was just his sidekick Maybe it won't be as bad I almost moved to Summerlin 10 years ago, 12 years ago, because he only died 13 years ago And then I did go to San Antonio for 3 months And I realized I have to face my demons, I'm not gonna get'm not going to get better. It doesn't matter where I am. And it held me back, man. Now that I'm through all that, I'm looking backwards and I'm going,

my greatest regret besides losing him is the amount of time I lost not living and making my family's life better and my life better and people's lives better. And that's why I started my podcast. Yeah. And the name of my podcast started as the comeback team.com. I do want to revamp it. Right now, it's the Beck Lover podcast because I do daily about news and a lot changed.

But I'm relaunching that brand because I love it. And every show, I interviewed amazing people. Shout out to Tyler Sherman. He sent me some great guests. I've shared some great guests with him. Tyler's the best. He called me one day. We got Rachel Ray on the show and now I'm friends with Rachel Ray, man. I mean, if you would have told this to the Beck,

that thought life can never get better, sitting in a room, crying myself to sleep every night, bro, for years, for years, brother, people talk about bad days. I had years of darkness, but the first thing I did when I lost my brother was never drink again Because I knew from the nightlife if I drank with a broken heart, I'm a dead man Yeah So if you got trauma in your life and you keep numbing yourself you need to face your demons the reason you're drinking that bottle

Of alcohol the reason you're taking that drug is because you don't have the courage to turn around and face those demons You need help now. Maybe I should have gone into therapy. I got that, I'm very spiritual, I pray brother. I prayed five times a day, I'm a Muslim, you know, by choice. And I got through that darkness because I do believe that God has designed us to overcome these things. You know, we don't need anything, He designed us to be able to handle these things and a lot of us, because we don't have that spiritual knowledge, that's why even the 12 steps in AA, right? They talk about a higher power. It's actually a part of it, right? So that spiritual guidance is really what got me through the darkest

times of my life. I don't think I'd be here if I didn't have God. I think when you lose people in life, for example, like I were like, I just actually got this about three weeks ago in the last couple of years, I've had seven guys, seven that I would consider my best friend at some point in my life or tight circle, right? Either my best friend, seven of them are now gone and crazy. Yeah. So I got this memento mori was I'm super into stoicism. Love that. And every time I don't want to do something or I do want to doicism, love that. And every time I don't wanna do something

or I do wanna do something, I grab this. And I think to myself, holy shit, any one of these dudes would give anything to do this thing that I don't wanna go do. And it gets me off my ass and I go do it. Or if there's something that's maybe out there that maybe I wanna do that other people are gonna look at and go, man, that's a little, like, what are you doing?

That's a little screwy. I'm like, you know what, dude? These guys would give anything to do, so I'm gonna do it like, what are you doing? That's a little screwy. I'm like, you know what, dude, these guys would give anything to do something, but do it anyway, regardless of what he thinks. I don't give a shit. When I started the podcast, okay, I never went to school. I wish I would have cut. You never know what you want to do when you're in college, right? I majored in finance and did the whole banking thing. I never liked it. Why was it? And my whole life, everyone's telling me, what are you doing, man? You belong in

front of a camera. People love you. You uplift people just on the street, strangers. Like I always have done this my whole life. Just try to inspire people, literally, to not give up. And it was crazy for me. I guess I had to go through the point where I felt like giving up, man. Because once you go through that, man, that darkness, you're a different person on the other side, man. It's crazy. So taking that pain and channeling it into the comeback team,

there was no money coming in. If you look at the first few episodes, horrible, okay? And here we are five years later, billions of views. And I'm not saying it to be arrogant because even the people closest to me made fun of me. You're old man now, what do you do? You have a midlife crisis, you're in your stupid podcast. Right? You look like an idiot. Right? And here I am now, brother.

Just in the last day over 10 million views, bro. It's crazy. And I'm talking across all platforms. I'm getting stopped, there's jewels you can ask. I'm getting stopped everywhere I go, it's crazy. Like it's insane, bro. Like on planes already three times on the valet parker freak. I can't go anywhere. I can't walk out of a mosque anymore without being. And it's, it's just crazy. And no one believes, man. No one, no one. Even from about people closest to me, no one believed in me, man. My girl did, you know, my son, he was going back and forth. And I was like, nah, no, he's like,

dad, no, he's like, dad, no, dad. He's like, dad, you're actually gonna make it. Dad, like, I can't believe it. I believe in you now. You know, so it's like, I never did it for that. When I started the comeback team, every show would end with, and no matter what you've been through, no matter how bad it is,

no matter how hopeless you may feel in this moment, as long as you still have air in your lungs, you can always make a comeback. See, dude, you walk in here, you walk in here and you talk about jealousy from my hair, but dude, that bass in your voice just gets right into your damn soul. Do you know what kept me going, brother?

You're touching people, man, with that thing. You know what kept me going? That's like a magical pipe. Shout out to Al, my producer, Al Pepe thing. You know what kept me going? That was like a magical pipe. Shout out to Al, my producer, Al Pepech. You know what kept him going? What's that? Kept us going? What's that?

After a couple of months, somehow, I'm talking about 100 views, bro. Like no views, okay? Also, I mean, I did have some cosmic inspiration, because I got to start my podcast with Arthur Nascarrella. Shout out Arthur Nascarrella. Played Carlo and the Sopranos. Famous actor. He's been to tons of shows. He was on billions. He was on, you know, Copland, right? And Arthur, I got, I went from begging Arthur to just come on my show. So he co-hosted like 20 of my first

episodes. So like it just gave me this such a boost of morale. You know, I had no following, no nothing. I was like, I've already made it, man. And what really made me go was when I get my first email, first message. There was a woman who was about to lose her eyesight and she had like six more months to see. And she's like, I heard your episode.

I had an amazing woman on my show named Silk. Silk is a survivor of domestic violence. She was beaten to the point where she's blind. So your episode. I had an amazing woman on my show named silk silk is a survivor of domestic violence She was beaten to the point where she's blind So I was interviewing her about her life and how she's reinvented life and you know all that She's an amazing human being but like you got to get her on your show and silk. I'm coming for you I promise you when I get this next bag. I'm coming for you still Cuz that's my dream and people go what's your dream our, you know, I want to walk into a refugee camp somewhere in the world and say, you guys lost everything.

Not for the cameras, brother, because that's not authentic. Yeah. Sometimes you need the cameras to inspire others though. You know what I mean? It's a fine line. To do the same. Yeah, it's a fine line. You want to make sure your intentions for God

and not for your own arrogance. So you know what kept me going, brother? What's that? She's like, I found out I'm going to be blind and I didn't want to live like that. So I got everything ready and I was going to take my own life. I heard your show. I heard your episode. I decided not to take my life because of you. And that just... If two people listen to that point. I said if I save one life. Yeah, if two people are listening to it and one of them says that, you're doing it

again. I was like, I'm not going. I'm not giving up. And then it announced thousands of people, bro. And then it like evolved where instead of being the host, I was like, I'm not going, I'm not giving up. And then it announced thousands of people, bro. And then it like evolved where, instead of being the host, I go on a few shows, man. And then it just, it just went crazy, bro. Like billions and billions, like literally billions of views. And I was at a very low point also at that time. Like I was being tried in my personal life, you know, everything was kind of going rough.

And it's like so easy to give up at this point. It's so easy. Like I don't got time for this podcast anymore. My whole world's on fire. But then there's that voice inside like, I'm not quitting, man. Like I've already lost too much. Or as Eric Thomas would say,

you're already going through pain. ET, man. Get a reward for it, right? Shout out to Eric Thomas, man. I'll be on the stage with you soon, brother. Cause I have a story to tell the world. Brother, all of a sudden I'm at one of my lowest points the phone starts like this I'm like what the hell's going on bro you're everywhere bro I was like what do you mean Tyrese Gibson just posted you Bella Hadid like everybody bro Kevin Daney this one that I'm like

what five years of darkness and in in two seconds, it changed. That's how quickly it can. Just like that. And now they all want me on their show and this one's following me, that one, and Tim Dillon just fine, God, it's just crazy, man. And I went now like more of being a host, so like now I was like,

no, we just want you on the show, man. But I miss the work, man. I miss having these inspirational stories, like what you're kind of doing right to inspire other people man because nothing helps you more than hearing people that have it worse than you okay Eric Patrick Thomas man please one day I'm gonna get him to Vegas god willing man he can't move from the neck down okay he lives in Flint Michigan Doesn't even have clean drinking water. He doesn't even have water to take a bath, bro. And I gave him my word. I'm going to get him out of that place.

Bro. I'm going to get him out of there, bro. I met him through the work I do, but I have never met a more positive human being that I am ashamed of myself. When I'm in grateful, when I think about what this man goes through every day of his life, and I have all these blessings bro so that's what I'm saying like you get inspired not only from the guests but people man they need hope man and this guy man this guy's amazing bro he's in front of his

house for no reason a straight bullet hits him he's's not gonna have problems with anybody. He was no gang banger, none of that stuff. Can't move from his neck down. And I got problems, bro. You got problems? We don't have those problems. But I'm saying these stories inspire, he's the most positive human being you will ever meet in your life. And we gotta help this guy, man.

So that's why I wanna relaunch. I still have my daily show. I wanna relaunch that work now. Now that things are moving, I love doing it. You know Charlie in LA? You know Charlie? Charlie. Has the Dream Factory.

You should meet him, dude. You have very, he's got a very LA energy to him and you got a very New York energy to you. Funny thing is I was born in Texas, but that's another story. But you guys have a lot of, like Charlie has this place, he does a thing called the Dream Factory. Just a little emotional, man, because I make a promise. Sometimes I'm late.

Yeah. And as an Albanian, we keep our word no matter what. But for a real Albanian, bro, it's embedded in our in our culture, brother. It's called Bessa. It means when Albanian gives you their word, they will lose their life before they break it. And I was brought up with that ideology. And so when I give someone my word,

the reason I'm emotional when I talk about Eric is I'm like, man, it's already been two years since I made this promise. Like I wanna help this guy, man. And I'm going to, because I love him. He's an amazing human being. Damon Johns helped him out a few times. And from Shark Tank, shout out to Damon.

I don't know him personally. So you start this journey right I'm here today because of a decision I decided to make five years ago with no experience no one believed I knew I had a gift but I didn't know how to harness it yet you know to do it publicly I have a little ADHD I'm a little hyper at times right which is good because I never heard my client selling me no. Because you need five no's before you get a yes. And, you know, just going through all of that, man. Look, I got to meet you, right?

So that one decision, where I could have listened to everyone else around me, the critics out and in, sometimes your own worst enemy. Instead I said, no man, no matter what, I'm gonna do it. And I had just lost a lot of money in a construction company and I took the little money I had left and threw it all into equipment

and I was like, we're gonna do this. We're gonna make it happen. Here we are. Well, as I always say, if you don't take up big losses, you're not entrepreneurial enough. Oh yeah, you're not. It's just, you know, some people get lucky their first shot around, but so yeah, man, I mean, so,

do you wanna talk some sales stuff? Yeah, let's talk sales. So I started in the industry that you're in, 18 years old, cut my teeth in sales in commercial leasing in midtown Manhattan. One of the most competitive markets in the world. And I'm working for a boutique firm on 8th Avenue, which is not a desirable location on your business card.

And I'm in what's considered the Garmin district, which used to be the epicenter of New York manufacturing. So we sold our country out and everything went overseas to Bangladesh and India and all over the world. And I'm working for Al who's my mom's first cousin. And you know, he's older than me and I'm only 18 years old. What, you know, what behind the ears don't know much about life or sales or anything. I mean I have courage but I don't have much more than that and he's like here's

your job. I'm like what's my job? He's like you see all these buildings? He's like yeah you're gonna walk into that building today, you're gonna go to the top floor, you're gonna knock on the door, you're gonna walk in and say hi my name is Beck I'm from Castle Rock Realty. We work with a lot of tenants, not only in the building, but in the area. You know, we can help you possibly find some space if you need to move. Basically, my objective was to try to find out

when they're least expired so we could build a database. Sure. And then try to follow up. I was terrified. Bro. I'm gonna walk into a building, I don't know anyone, I'm gonna just go and try to meet the owner, and like, how am I gonna do this?

This is terrifying. He's like, kid, in those windows, you're not seeing glad. There's money in there, man, go get the money. It's in there. I go in, man, I got thrown out in five seconds, first time. I had no idea how to talk fast and have a personality and open up the conversation, right? I had no experience.

That's what I want people to understand. I didn't wake up and become a world-class speaker who has viral videos overnight. I didn't know what I was doing. I was scared. So the problem you have, if you are where you are in your life, is not because you don't know something. None of us knew. You didn't know what you know about real estate 30 years ago, what you do today. Can you compare yourself to that guy? No. So when are you gonna have what you're lacking, my friend, if you're watching, you're lacking courage. You have to have some courage in your life. You gotta sit there and say,

I think it's more scary to not try than try, bro. I'd rather be the guy that tried everything and failed a million times than be a corporate serf the rest of my life, barely getting by, not living life on my terms. And I learned that lesson the hard way, getting to the top of the corporate world, making the money that people dream of making and being completely miserable to the point

where I was going with ambulances once a week thinking I'm having heart attacks, it was panic attacks. Because I was miserable in the environment I was in. Because you weren't aligned with your true values. Because I was not living my purpose. So I think the secret to all of this, to young people, is if you could figure out truly,

the hardest thing in life is not to make it. Because you can make it financially and still not be happy, right? The key, in my opinion, is to figure out what you really want to do. So what does happiness mean for you? To be able to produce a living doing something that you really love and are good at. And I think people don't take the cues that God gives them.

I ignored my cues for a very long time, brother. Every single human being on earth has a gift that God gave them. Your gift might be that you make the best apple pie in the world, but you're thinking, I gotta go onto Wall Street and learn all this stuff, and you idiot. Everyone keeps telling you, man, Jimmy, I really love your apple pie, Jimmy. Jimmy, can you make us one for the holidays? And everyone's begging you to make, hello, McFly. That's God telling you that's your gift. Listen to him. Everyone always told

me man you have such a way of speaking, you inspire me. I knew this for years. I ignored my gift man. It's like what's the joke the guy gets stranded on a desert island and says oh God's gonna save me and then what is it a tire comes by and he could have grabbed on to it and he says no no no I'm not grabbing the tire because I'm waiting for God. Exactly. Then a small ding tire comes by and he could have grabbed onto it and he says, no, no, no, I'm not grabbing the tire because I'm waiting for God. Then a small dinghy comes by, I'm not doing that. I'm waiting for God.

And then a ship comes by, no, I'm not doing that. And then the guy ends up starving to death on the island, dies, goes to heaven. He answered your prayer, but not the way you thought. Yeah, why didn't you save me? I sent you a boat, a tire, and a dinghy, you didn't grab any of them. You didn't even try.

You didn't grab any of them. So I think a lot of young people, they're scared, they're worried about too much what people think. They live in a world now where everything's under a microscope. They're living in a world where I call it the Easter bunny generation. The Easter bunny generation. So they feel a lot of FOMO and they feel insignificant because they're looking at everyone cropping their life perfectly.

So they feel like I'm behind, I'm not doing what my peers are doing, I'm a loser, you know, and subconsciously, right, these thoughts creep into their mind. And they don't realize that even those people, there's been times, brother, I've posted, I'm in Aruba and everything's gorgeous and I'm in the room crying, brother. Like you're not seeing everything that's going on in our lives. You need to remember this young generation. This is why they're the Easter Bunny generation. They are so beautiful,

because during Easter, right, you guys have the chocolates that are like hollow. You know, you grab the, you know, they sell them during that time. The eggs, they're hollow. That's why I call them the Easter Bunny generation. They're absolutely beautiful on the outside. They're hollow on the inside.

But they're empty on the inside. And because they're watching their other friends and everyone doing that, they always feel empty themselves. Because we weren't made to see everything that's going on all the time. You need to focus on what you're doing day by day, man. Don't worry about the noise. Your time will come, man. But you got to make a choice. You got to have some courage in your life and you got to be willing to take a little bit of pain. Otherwise, nothing's going to change in

your life. So how do you reconcile with this? Cause this is something that I, I, I fight with internally personally a lot too, which is the thing that is so good to us, which is social media and all of these clicks and all these views and all the stuff is also something that in the back of my mind, not necessarily, I don't think my, my content's hurting anybody, but I think the fact that you're just sitting there scrolling mindlessly for hours.

And I'm guilty of it at times. I'm not gonna lie. I'm guilty of it. So how do you reconcile with that? That's why I have a good woman next to me. She yells at me, you idiot, you moron. What are you doing? Oh, you're gonna go, wake up, grab your phone, go ahead, scroll, go. No, but do you feel-

So I have a safety mechanism because listen, it's addictive. No, no, no, but do you feel that you're contributing to the same thing you're saying is causing that problem? How do you reconcile it? Yes and no, because at least I'm not posting myself, at least I'm posting content that inspires, maybe teaches a lesson, gives a good message,

where a lot of the other stuff is ridiculous stuff, bro, that can be very negative, fights, all these things. There's a lot of garbage on there that's very harmful for you, and people looking at women and this and that. I don't like the exploitation in my opinion of, you know, stuff like Kanye West just did, like, come on. It was so ridiculous.

Ridiculous is not the word. It's like a mockery, man. And it's just disgusting. Like you're that bad. You need, you're one of the most famous people in the world. You needed that much clout, bro. Like really? Like this is your wife, you love her.

Like you're letting everyone see what only your eyes should be seeing, man. She loves it too. Don't worry, she's Yeah. She loves it too. Don't worry. She's a clout chaser too. I reconcile it by thinking, you know, everybody's so worried. Like look at what you people that eat people that are, you know, heavy, morally, you know,

really obese eat terribly. So they're so concerned there too. If you eat a bunch of junk food, you're going to be terrible. So what you consume with your brain is more important to me than what you consume with your mouth. And so many people are just Kardashians, just junk food right into their brain. They're just shoving it right in their brain.

They don't realize it. They don't realize it. They really do not realize what they're allowing in to everything. So at least I feel like I'm not making junk food. No, man, you're making healthy food for the mind, man. That's how I reconcile. You know, that helps the world.

Cool. Well, dude, Beck, if they want it, if they want to find more of you, how do they do it? You can follow all the handles at B E K that's B like boy, E like Edward K like Kimberly Beck. There's no C Beck lover, NYC on IG, TikTok X or Beck lover.com, or you could watch the Beck lover podcast and you were a podcast are received.

I love it, brother. Well, dude, if you ever need anything here, you, you let me know. I got you. You're going to come back, man. We'll come knock on another one. There was a lot we didn't talk about. I know it goes quick, man. It goes quick. I know, man. I got to get to the next one too. Let's rock, brother. It was really nice to meet you, man. You too. You too, man. Well guys, I hope you enjoyed that as much as I did.

And remember, man, if you're up against adversity, there is, it just takes, like you heard how quickly this dude's life turned around. Never give up. It could turn around for you in his Basie voice. Never give up. Never surrender. Never surrender. We will not go silently into the night.

We'll see you next week. What's up everybody. Thanks for joining us for another episode of Escaping the Drift. Hope you got a bunch out of it, or at least as much as I did out of it. Anyway, if you want to learn more about the show, you can always go over to escapingthedrift.com, you can join our mailing list, but do me a favor, if you wouldn't mind, throw up that five star review, give us a share, do something, man. We're here for you, hopefully you'll be here for us.

But anyway, in the meantime, we will see you at the next episode.