Espresso - biggest lie you've been told

Episode Date: November 11, 2021

🔒 𝗷𝗼𝗶𝗻 𝗺𝘆 𝗽𝗮𝘁𝗿𝗲𝗼𝗻 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗲𝘅𝗰𝗹𝘂𝘀𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗽𝗼𝗱𝗰𝗮𝘀𝘁𝘀 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙠 (𝗼𝗻����𝘆 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗮𝗺) https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ♦️ 𝗦𝘂𝗯𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗶𝗯𝗲 𝗼𝗻 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗧𝘂𝗯𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXRwNZpU67AK24r5QGfIfCw 🔹 𝙙𝙤𝙣'𝙩 𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙚 & 𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙞𝙚𝙬 ;) on this episode Ben answers the Espresso Question of the week: what's the biggest lie you've ever been told? (like guys having to sit when they pee) 86 news covers a man TRAPPED IN A WALL FOR 2 DAYS then ben explains what he would do if time froze, he confesses how he broke vegetarianism for 4 microwaved chicken nuggets at 3am and @nickysmigs comes on to chill for a new seg called 10MINUTES 🔸𝗦𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗲 𝗮 𝗖𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗼 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗝𝗢𝗛𝗡𝗦𝗢𝗡: https://v.cameo.com/E48BXekQ29 🔹𝗧𝗶𝗸𝗧𝗼𝗸: https://www.tiktok.com/@benedictpolizzi?source=h5_m 🔸𝗜𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺: https://www.instagram.com/benedictpolizzi/ 🔹𝗧𝘄𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿: https://twitter.com/benedictpolizzi

Espresso's I heard it's daylight savings Time now And that means it gets darker earlier That's funny Well when I record the podcast And the sun isn't up anymore That just means one thing

It means it's Late night suppress Now listen up I'm your music teacher MTC Peaks And today We're gonna be learning how to play The xylophone

Matter of fact, that's what you hear in the background So get ready Mr. Pizza Yeah here in the background. So get ready. Mr. Pizza. Yeah. Today you learned the Xylo phone. Call me one, two, three. Into the dome.

Yeah. Mr. Pizza, I'm your teacher. This is the class where I teach you. Bang on that thing and shake that ass. What? Oh my God. I'm so sorry. Where I teach you, bang on that thing and shake that ass What, oh my god I'm so sorry Oh my gosh What's up?

Oh my god, Shot 184, Espresso Podcast I'm your host, Mr. Pizza What's good? We got a hot one today, baby. Woo! This show's about to... We're doing some new things. Yeah, I said it. But first, I've just got one little thing I need to address. Just right off the top, it's kind of been going on, and I wanted to say something about it before, like, you know,

just before it gets like too, too much. Um, I don't know how to say it really, but I'll just, I'll just. Pretty six news. I'm James Benedict.

A naked man was found trapped inside a wall at an iconic theater after two straight days. Yeah, I know. Jeez. days. Yeah. I know. Jeez. After he was pulled out, he asked authorities, how do you know I was in

here? Did you use a stud finder? Oh, God! I know. It's a sensitive subject. I just couldn't help myself. But in all seriousness, firefighters found him by subject. I just couldn't help myself. But in all seriousness, firefighters found him by drilling

a small opening through several layers of wall tile. And heroically, they came up with the subject, which is now a huge story. And it's incredible that they found him.

And that's what you call a glory hole oh god I'll stop I'll stop and this man he was immediately taken to a hospital for evaluation which of course he should

I mean this is nothing to kid about. He had no visible injuries, but authorities said he was suffering from dehydration. And, ladies and gentlemen, that's why they call it drywall. 36 News. I'm James Benedict. Fucking drywall. What's up fam

God damn it's good to be back Wow almost fell down You almost just fall down when you're not supposed to fall down Like I did right there I'm wearing new shoes at the restaurant Bro I almost fall down 40 times a day It's gonna happen happen, man.

I know it's going to happen. I'm just playing with fire. Man, that was a real dad phrase, huh? You're playing with fire, you know that? I am playing with fire. Did I hear Air Force Ones were like, the whole reason I never wanted to work in a restaurant my entire life was because, one, it's annoying.

And two, I was like, I don't want to wear those lame ass shoes. Like that's, that was my reason through and through. I was like, I'm not wearing those shoes. That is so whack. But you don't have to wear those shoes. I didn't know that. I didn't know like you can agree to be like, hey uh i'd rather just break my neck and then not wear those shoes i didn't know that was an option i thought when you worked

at a restaurant you had to wear those shoes i'm not wearing those they're like yeah but if you get hurt and you're not wearing those shoes you're liable and i was like if you find me on the ground in a puddle of water with a snapped leg and I have non slips on I'd rather die whoops saw a guy on the tricycles coming in what up though we're just gonna we're gonna hop right in man we're gonna hop right into the question. Quick, quick, quick, quick. Espresso question of the week. Week. What's the biggest lie you've ever been told? What's the biggest lie you've ever been told?

It can be by your parents. There are some answers. I haven't looked at them yet because you know how we do it on the Espresso Pod. We just go all natch. Off the top, baby. What's the biggest lie you've ever been told? For me, I guess growing up, bro, I swear to God, my parents

specifically, when people say specifically and say specifically, there's like four words like that that i'm like okay my dad promised me so much shit growing up it's probably not different though than like anybody else but i swear to god i was like i can't wait till we go to disney world that motherfucker was never matter of fact i didn't even want to go to Disney World. That motherfucker was never. Matter of fact, I didn't even want to go to Disney World either. I just said that shit because everybody wanted to.

Not that I'm mad about it or anything. Does it sound like I'm mad that we didn't go to fucking Disney World? God damn it. Dude, I went to Disneyland not too long ago. Sucked. Sucked. Unless you're, if you're over the age of three, shithole, dude, there are cockroaches on the ground. Wasn't that great? TBH. Wasn't that great? Oh, but what's my, uh, what's the biggest lie I've ever been told? It's really this, this whole question

stems from that. i tweeted something out that like this is the biggest lie ever and it's a picture of the like xfinity remote control or the comcast remote you know i'm talking about that silver joint a1 remote that motherfucker was complex though remember the remote that you had in your house like has the remote that you had in your house like in high school bro there are more buttons on that thing than a fucking airplane cockpit what kind of license do i need to turn this bitch on and then they for they have the balls they're xfinity and comcast or whatever how many goddamn cable companies team up to make one there's like 17 now that are just one thing one force when uh and then they have the balls to have that

button that says all on right in the middle like that's really gonna work did i swear i i straight up stopped watching tv because it's so goddamn hard to just turn it on i'm like like you know they make those phones for grandparents that have like two buttons that say like, Daughter-in-law. And like, off. I need that for the TV, man. The TV. I'm so 31 right now. I just said, I need that for the TV.

Whenever you start throwing the's in front of places that don't need the's. Hey, you're 30. Yeah, I swear I stopped watching TV. Like, I just want to, sometimes when I watch TV, the only time I watch TV is when I'm sleeping. So that doesn't even count. And I'm usually sleeping because I can't figure out how to turn the goddamn volume sound bar on.

So I'm like, it's muted. I'm done. I'm out. But yeah, that's my biggest lie, that all-on button. Dude, it is so hard to turn on. Turning on a TV at your friend's house. Try it. Do it.

Squid games in real life. Turning on... I hate squid games. I should fucking watch it, though. But... Turn on... That should be a modern fear factor thing Turn on your shower Turn on your friend's shower Try it

Do it in five minutes First time I spent the night at my friend's house He was like yeah you take a shower first and I was like okay completely forgot that the the shower is like a goddamn booby trap it's like you it's like you're in a mission impossible movie and you have to like cut wires cut the red wire it's like it's like that the walk of shame my walk of shame is not like walking out of an apartment that i'm ashamed to be in after like a long night like a one night stand my walk of shame is going back downstairs and my friend's friend's mom and being like how you turn and then she tells you again you're like when she's explaining to you you're like, when she's explaining it to you, you're like, I got no chance, bitch. Just fucking go up there and turn it on.

The fuck you think this is? You think I'm going to be able to figure this shit out? This isn't my fucking house. What if you did that? What if you sat your friend's mom down and she's like, oh, just go up there, turn the lever twice and then pull the thing down. And you're like, listen, bitch. I didn't come here to embarrass myself in your house turn that fucking thing on or i'm gonna take a bath you hear me

you don't want that smoke get your ass upstairs turn on the shower for me god damn i'm the guest i fucking wish, bro Alright, let's get to some of these That was crazy Being real with your friend's mom Jesus Christ Mary Allen Turn on the goddamn shower

That's all I ask Get in trouble by your friend's mom Mary Allen. Turn on the goddamn shower. That's all I ask. Get in trouble by your friend's mom. Grown up. I swear to God, one time I ate all my friend's Pop-Tarts. And just la-da-dee, la-da-doo for the next 12 hours. I didn't have a full stomach of strawberry frosted pop tarts oh i don't yeah that's i don't that's i don't that's not because dude it's it's because

my family had zero good food so when i went to my friend's houses i was like are you kidding me Are you kidding me? Here we go. Biggest lie you've ever been told. Brian Price, 12. Yo, what's up, Ben? A.K.A. Johnson.

Love the espresso pod. The biggest lie I've ever been told. Let's go. I don't know if it's the biggest lie, but it makes zero sense. How come when we're in middle or high school and you want to play sports, you're like, hey dad, I want to try out for the baseball team. And he's like, okay, we're going to take you to Dr. Anderson and you're going to have to do a physical. Well, what's that? Well, it's where you go to the doctor, you have to pull your pants down for some really weird reason they put a rubber glove on take two

fingers put them underneath your ball sack you look straight forward ahead of the wall and you cough and that'll determine if you can play sports it's the weirdest thing of all time it's a huge lie i don't believe it and therefore it's my biggest lie of all time. Dude, that's good shit, BrianPrice12. Let's go! See, I gotta stop saying let's go. I'm saying let's go like it's a new phrase. You know? Let's go has been... It's been said by like 8th graders 10 years ago.

And now I'm like, let's go. Alright, but he's right, dude. He's right. Physical? getting physicals I fucking hate that What a hold up You still gotta get your physical And the way they check for physicals

What is it? What is this? Am I like a war hero? What the fuck? You can't check for a physical a different way than drop them turn your head and cough while I wiggle my fingers under your gooch that's so weird like you can't like there's not like a thing you can pump on my arm like just something nope old fashioned way go ahead cough for me cough isn't that so weird cough

what a foreign ass thing can we update the physical I can't wait bro I can't wait till I'm the god damn mayor no more physicals if you suck you suck when's the last time somebody's physical didn't go through And they couldn't play

Yeah, his physical just never panned out Oh, really? He's not gonna be playing on your team this year Nope Didn't cough He failed his physical, why? He just had other plans Never coughed Why? He just had other plans.

Never coughed. That's so dumb. Update the physical. Turn your head for me. All right, you're starting tomorrow. Here we go. Biggest lie you've ever been told just jed just jed biggest lie you've ever been told the biggest lie i've ever been told and i will never fucking get over it is i did not know that the girl scouts do not bake their own goddamn cookies like i'm sitting here supporting them like thinking they're baking their cookies and they're whatever girl scout kitchen way factory cookie whatever that's also child labor

but anyways the point is that i can't get over the fact that they don't bake their own cookies dude i never even thought of that that's some high shit you thought that they made those those girls i would never eat those fucking things if they made those those girls I would never eat those things if girls made those disgusting oh you thought they really just were were like making do-si-dos and all of them and then selling them in that professional ass box that's not a bake sale That's not a bake sale That's crazy dude I never thought about that And by the way

Girl Scout cookies Not that good Just saying If you really think about it Girl Scout cookies Not that good If aliens came down And they ate Girl Scout cookies

They'd be like They'd look at each other and be like they're not that good bro i promise el fudge cookies are straight serious compared to girl scout cookies let me get a voice message up in here here we go. Bender Joey. What's the biggest lie you've ever been told? What up, Joey?

I'll give you your Bobbit bag real soon. That's hilarious. Because, whoops, been in my car for the last six months. Yeah, I'll bring it to you, though, bro. Just invite me over. That's all you gotta do is you though, bro. Just invite me over. That's all you got to do is invite me over. You never invite me over. What am I supposed to do?

Show up at your front door, ring the doorbell and have it in like a Target bag and put it on your doormat. Here we go. Liam Pinero. What's the biggest lie you've ever been told? Hey, Ben. It's Liam Pinero from your first kiss. Listen, the biggest lie I've ever been told was that it's like girly or sissy or lame for dudes to sit when they pee. Like there's no benefit to standing when you pee unless you're like a urinal I get.

But if you're at home, bro, if you sit when you pee, you're not going to aim nothing. You don't have to waste the energy standing up. You don't have to unzip anything. You just pull them straight down, knock it out, pull them up, wash your hands if you're into that, and then dip, bro. There's nothing wrong with sitting when you pee, and I'll stand by that against anyone, bro. And I'll stand by that against anyone, bro. Sitting over standing all day long. Don't at me. Anyways, love the show.

Keep up the good work. Do your thing. That's facts. Man, I'm such a... Yeah, does it make you a bitch? Dude, I sit every time. If I'm at home, I sit every time. It's just less. Bro, there's a lot of things you got to

do there's a lot of going on when you're standing up peeing you're playing like when like girls don't understand it but you know the game at chucky cheese where you're like spraying the double like thing you know what i mean you got somebody next to you got gotta hit that target That's peeing for guys Girls always get all shitty When there's piss on the seat Yo, come challenge me You got some tokens, bitch? Let's play It's not easy

Dude, sitting down Girls don't know how good they have it With that How do you guys just not pass the hell out? Bro, I love sitting when you... Dude, it's healthier for you. And also, when guys... When the narrative is like, guys can't get fruity drinks.

You gotta be... Yo. Look at a fruity, girly drink compared to a guy drink What looks better I'm all about presentation What looks better The blue frozen thing with sugar on the rim A lime and an umbrella in it

Or a glass of like dehydrated piss With a big chunk of ice in it Fuck What do you think I'm picking? Pussy Pussy I love bitchy drinks I'll drink the whole thing in one second

Sit my ass down and ride in the toilet And get Good shit Liam Alright we're moving on That was the espresso Quick quick quick quick Question of the week Alright now let's go

Viral Viral Viral Viral Viral You guys wonder what the segment viral is And you wonder why I make all those noises The segment You guys wonder what the segment viral is? And you wonder why I make all those noises?

The segment viral is, I just find popular hashtags on the internet. And I just talk about them. And I do... That noise is this. That's literally how we used to get on the internet. God, that's embarrassing, dude. What was that? Anyway, that's why I make that noise. Anyway, that's why I make that noise Hashtag odd ways to freeze time I know I'd wait If I had the opportunity to freeze time for like one day I know I'd waste all my time and just do something stupid

I would freeze time And take all the money out of a bank And no one would ever know it I mean that'd be kind of criminal I guess But that is the first thing that comes to my mind Maybe I'm a thief What would I do? I would do something so stupid

I wouldn't even know My first thought honestly is to go to Best Buy And like take like six TVs Why? TVs aren't even expensive I'd rather just do something dumb like take like six TVs. Why? TVs aren't even expensive. I'd rather just do something dumb than actually something like, like something like,

that like is valuable. I'd rather do, this is what I do. This is what I thought of every single time. You know, you think about with time froze, what would you do? I would make everyone kiss can you imagine that time freezes while you're at target and you're like holy shit i'm the only one dude i would move everybody so close together and just everybody would just be like this

self-checkout line just the weirdest two people ever like in the in the frozen food section oh shit i'd have but i would set up i would take cameras from best buy while i was there earlier and i'd set them up everywhere so I could have everybody's reaction dude imagine being frozen just waking up making out with the with the customer service lady that just helped you return something you're like oh my do you want your receipt bro everybody's kissing everybody might like I might fuck around And like put people's clothes on backwards too

So they're like what did you do Just me Hope so Hashtag Dude that's That kept happening to me today too First of all at work today today, I was super... Like, I haven't served at work in like three weeks.

And if you don't serve, if you don't do anything for three weeks, you suck. So I went into work and I was just like, yeah, whatever. It'll be like normal. Dude, I didn't know how to do... I forgot how to do everything. I was super awkward. My first table was like... Is that going to have some kind of like speech impediment yes but like

my voice kept cutting out too I would talk to tables and like you know you got something like you eat something weird you got something in your throat you don't notice it it always happens when I eat sunflower seeds like I'll eat sunflower seeds and I'll like talk to somebody and like three of my words will skip I'll say like 15 words And three of them won't be there So today I was like Yo welcome to Welcome to the eagle Can I get you Or anything

And they were like I hate that shit That happened to me so many times And I had to repeat myself It's already awkward when you're When you're at a restaurant Now I'm skipping words He's got the skips

Leave him alone Hashtag new fall hobbies Kind of sorry to say this but I started eating chicken again Oh shit I swear dude I started eating chicken again. Oh, shit. I swear, dude. I just stopped eating chicken and steak and shit.

It was not hard. People are like, dude, how did you stop eating chicken and steak? You're crazy. What do you eat? I was like, I just eat eggs and beans every day. I did that when I ate steak and chicken. Almost got a cramp. Holy shit, that scared me.

That's when my life flashes before my eyes. When you feel your hamstring kind of lock up. You straighten that bitch out so quick. That's the quickest movement in your life. When you feel that little tense in your hamstring. You're like, if I get a cramp right here, I'm done. Immediately. I don't care where I am, dude.

My leg is like a tree trunk, two by four. What's the worst place you ever got a cramp in for me? Um, when I was in my car driving and I had to pull over on the side of the road and everybody thought I was dying. I got the worst. Dude, I got two hamstring cramps at the same time while I was dying. I got the worst cramps. Dude, I got two hamstring cramps at the same time while I was on a highway. Me in the car. Ah! You can't fix cramps, dude.

People are like, drink water, eat bananas. Yeah, right, dog. You think that's going to instantly fix a cramp? I'm on I-69 screaming. What were we talking about? Oh, I eat chicken now. Like two years ago, I just gave up eating chicken because I was like, I'm sick of making this. It's not even good anymore.

And it was so easy to stop. Chicken because I was like I'm sick of making this it's not even good anymore and it was so easy to stop And the other day and like the this is how I broke pescatarianism It wasn't some gourmet meal it wasn't like ruth chris steakhouse I ate four tyson chicken nuggets from gopuff At like 3 a. was it That was my like You know what I'm gonna put this to rest They sucked Alright that's two days Thursday

National forget me not day I really do play that game though When you like somebody And you're like she loves me she loves me not I. I really do play that game, though. When you like somebody, you know, when you like somebody and you're like, she loves me, she loves me not. I really did that one time. I do that with everything I do. If I like a girl, like, I will do everything I do. Like, if I'm shooting something in the trash, I'm like, and I miss, I'm like, fuck. Every time.

It's always something in the trash I'm like If I make it I'm like Guess you'll be texting me later huh Every single thing If I get this light Friday Veterans Day The amount of times I thought veterans

Looked like veterinarians And said veterinarians Not okay Thank you for your service Saturday National French Dip Day Ew bro the first time I saw a commercial For Arby's French Dip.

Ah! That was the grossest shit I've ever seen. Sometimes you ever think a commercial is a parody? And you're like, oh, I must be watching Comedy Central or something. Bro, the way they dip that roast beef sandwich in the au jus. Oh! I hate that word! Oh, my God.

I just pictured Oh my god Imagine if someone whispered that into your ear Oh holy shit I'd rather die I would rather die Than someone come up to me and go Think of a person you would hate For someone to whisper in your ear

That person I know who it is for me If that person came up to you and went Ajou Oh holy shit I swear I'd kill someone Is that even the name of the sauce? How the fuck do you spell ajou?

What the fuck am I doing? Ajou sauce? Ew bro It's spelled even more A-U space J-U-S Aujus I hate that shit so much Ajou bro Get out of here

That's what guys drinks look like In the club Ajoo Ajoo Is that why we say that when we sneeze Cause it's just shit in your hands Can I have some ajoo Sunday

National Indian Pudding Day What the fuck is this Native American pudding I'm sorry I didn't make that up. I feel like pudding is just... Does anyone eat pudding anymore? Damn, this looks flame. What is this?

Vanilla ice cream, butter, golden raisins, cinnamon, milk? Shut up. Yo, I want some Native American pudding. Oh, it has nothing to do with India. It's also not a food that Native Americans or Indians... Okay, I don't know. But it looks like apple crisp, and goddamn, I wanted apple pie so bad today.

You ever just crave some shit for no reason? For me, it's always fucking those butter pickles. Oh, I want those pickle chips all the time. I'm like a pregnant bitch. Whoops. All right. Smurglio. How would you say that?

You can't hear me, can you? You can't hear me. I got you. I got you. What's up, man? How the fuck do you say your name? You don't know? No.

Smerlio or Smeriglio, whatever. You don't even know. I get Smeriglio most of the time, but the G is silent. So I guess if you want to, you know, my Italian ass grandpa would get pissed off. Just like, you know. Yeah, yeah. I got a story about that shit too. Smerlio?

Yeah, it works, bro. All right, let's do it, man. What's up? Nothing much, man. What's going on? This is a new little segment on the Espresso podcast called 10 Minutes. You're the first one, man. What's up?

What's up? We're doing 10 Minutes. I told you 20 because I had a little bit of extra time in there for setup. Chopping it up. There you go, man. So you're in LA? Yeah. I met my cuts rep today for the like the ambassador program i'm

doing and then uh i'm actually dude i got a call like three days ago my manager i'm opening for fucking jake is that you you're not cuts who did you who would you buy from now is my let me guess no i'm i'm just like you bro hey 15 policy 15 15% Polizzi 15 if you want 50% off. You got it? Where's the link tree, dude? I had no idea. Hey, in my bio. Dude, we gotta have a we're having a fake laugh off contest

before the 10 minutes. Dude, I can I can go for a whole day. Hey, I'll die for this shit. Dude, it's Oh my fucking Nick Smurio Hey, say it. Say it. Nick, say your last name again smirilio sounds like a candy bar

yeah yeah that's actually that's a great point smirilio's with the big coffee with the coffee hey you're in la right now yeah yeah did Yeah. Did I already ask that? Yeah, it's okay. We're going back. No. Yeah. It's only 10 minutes. We got to hurry this shit up. Huh? Oh, you're good boss. Did you go to LA fitness in LA? Dude, I have an LA fitness membership on long in New York. Before I came here, I changed it to national elite so I could go in LA. I'm going tomorrow.

You're LA Fitness VIP. Oh, yeah, dude. $39 a month. That's not good. It's pricey shit, man. Oh, God, dude. It's the character's walk. What was it like?

What was it like? I saw a bunch of it. I haven't gone yet. Huh? I haven't gone yet. I just got to LA today. I'll probably go to the actual gym tomorrow, but I just changed the membership because I'm going to be here for six days.

So I'm like, I got to, you know, as a standup, you know, traveling this much, like it's probably worth having a national like membership. You got to, you got to. The LA, I think the LA, LA fitnesses, the differences, they've got the towels in the bathroom. That's huge. Game changer. That's all I need. Totally worth the 10 bucks a month. And if you're not even working out, you can just,

you can just put it around your neck and you're like, Oh, that guy knows what he's doing. He's been working some traps out the past 30 minutes. Yeah. Tuck it in. If you need to. That is hilarious, bro. Nice plant back there. Thanks i'm in uh i'm in like a media center this isn't my shit oh nice damn i was gonna say it's a legit setup is that a cinematic mode camera that thing's legit man yeah we got the autofocus going i

apologize i'm all stuffed up my fucking sinuses in the plane we're totally i don't know what happened oh how's the flight descending and just fucking jammed up bro get this we're sitting at the gate some guy has a fucking heart attack on the plane dude dude flight attendant the flight attendant runs off the aisle he's running into all the seats i'm like i thought he was i thought he was fucking hammered he's he's unraveling a defibrillator to strap it up to a guy whose heart stopped on the fucking plane you thought he was drunk he's like what are you doing what's this guy doing he's running into every and then he's literally taking the wires off some guy got his stethoscope out from the overhead bin some random civilian starts hooking it up they put the plane back at the gate

they open the door a full medical staff comes out i I'm like, they're reviving a guy on the plane. It was, it was the craziest shit. And now mind you, it was eight o'clock flight. That shot a JF case. I was up at five in the morning, just like, I'm like, what the fuck is going on? So yeah, dude, that was, I've never seen anybody had to get revived on an airplane. And then he stood up. There's a whole medical staff that just appeared. And they came from the airport um so yeah i don't know how the hell like where they came from but it was definitely they weren't on the plane it was just a random dude

must have been a doctor on the plane who got his stethoscope out so anyways that was an airline what airline united bro oh okay shit they got a nice little they got a nice little video before you take off that shit almost made me cry one time you know what i'm talking about bro yeah it's super dramatic i was like damn where are we going it's so dramatic all different like cultures and shit yeah exactly the wiener hosen i'm like what is this fucking Springfest? What's going on? So you got shows in LA? Yeah, I'm actually opening for fucking Jay Leno, dude. Where?

At Burbank, at Flappers. Oh, yeah. That's a nice little spot. I like Flappers. I like it. How's New York? It's good, man. I'm loving it. I moved there October 3rd. October 3rd?

Yeah, just moved like a month and a half ago. You're already up at Caroline's and all that? You're doing some moving. Yeah. No, it's been good. Yeah, it's been busy, man. It's been busy. I'm going to try to get out there in December.

We got to link up. do something. Yeah, dude. We got to do some TikToks, bro. Absolutely. Dude, literally you, you messaged me like, yo, you're ready in like 15. I'll send you a, what's your email? Like two minutes before that, a random chick DM me, he goes, you and Polizzi have to collab. I'm like, wait for the podcast. It's coming out. The cast is coming out. Two minutes before I'm like emily emily yeah you're reading minds over here so so so you're kind of familiar with indy you said

your sister lives here yeah my parents went to purdue my sister went to purdue um my sister lives with her fiance she's been there for two years now and Indy he's from Indy. So, uh, you got to come through, man. And so I ran into your sister one time, not knowing what was going on. And she's like, Hey, Polizzi, you know, my brother, he does the Maniscalco impression. Oh God. That's such, I can't stand. It's just assuming that you know who I am.

Cause before you page or some shit, like, I never, I never said anything like, yo, don't police you one up. I never said that, dude. You would think two Italian douchebags on TikTok might know each other. But that's the thing. I was like, oh, I do know

her brother. It's that Matterday Night Live dude. I thought that was you. Oh, shit. No, yeah. He's more talented. I was like, he he's a talent he's more talented i was like he yeah he he can do more voices than i can't do that many voices every day i'm like talented fucking dude yeah he's a talented dude so but that was cool man that was cool we gotta we gotta link it up at some point but i think it's been i think it's been 10 minutes we can talk later on but we gotta we gotta stick to the plan, baby.

You do your thing. I appreciate the invite after Instagram. Say what? I appreciate the invite to the cast. It's right after a couple of DMs. We can talk forever, but I'll hit you up sometime. Thanks for coming on, dog. Thanks for having me.

I'll see you soon, homie. Sounds good, bro. Thanks for Smear Yellow. Nailed it. Great candy. Let's go. Thanks, dog. Thanks for having me. I'll see you soon, homie. Sounds good, bro. Nailed it. Great candy. Let's go. Thanks, man. Talk to you. Shout 184, yo. Thanks for listening. Remember to subscribe, rate, review.

Follow. Subscribe on YouTube, my bad, and join the Patreon. It's an extra episode a week And last week I put I sneak peeked some shit on there that you'd like And there's a lot of fam info only So check that out

Fam info only means just me Me and the fam who are Patreon members Who I've joined We have a little We talk about different stuff And it's cool And you should be in on that But alright y'all

I'll talk to you guys next week Alright