Espresso - opinions you get HATE for

Starting point is 00:00:00 It's really mean. I can't wait. I could never say it to anybody I know. But I don't care about your kids. Yeah! I don't care at all about your kids. Most people you know don't care about your kids. Nobody does. Like they're kind of cute and they're a baby, but all babies look the fucking same. Thank you. And then they're just annoying. Bro, I love this love this hey fam welcome to another espresso podcast hey upcoming stand-up shows ontario california march 16th that's this

Starting point is 00:00:37 coming thursday see you there kansas city missouri march. KCMO. I didn't know you guys were sexy like that, Kansas City. You guys have nicknames and shit? Can't wait to see you, fucks. Albany, New York, April 6th. And Tampa, Florida, April 27th. Grab ticks in the description of the podcast. description of the podcast. More dates coming soon. Let's talk, babe. What's up, girlies? It's Shot 252, and I'm your host, Benedict Polizzi. Hey, for an extra episode every single week, join the Patreon. Only $5. Espresso question of the week this week. Hey, what was the thing you'd get a lot of hate for if you said it out loud? What is it? What is it? What's the thing you'd get a lot of hate for if you said it out loud? What is it? What is it? What's the thing?

Starting point is 00:01:27 What's the thing? For me, I think all country music songs are written just by an AI word bank. They just have like 17 words in a word bank. And they just all, they scatter them throughout the song it's like mama lonely stars cute old lady beer

Starting point is 00:01:53 and that's every country song they could literally do that it'd be fine trucks I don't know yeah sorry all country singers sorry country singers but a robot wrote that

Starting point is 00:02:13 country singers are robots dot com my new domain how do I get tickets for your shows oh it's just at country singers are robots dot com sounds good who's not going to that website most visited website of How do I get tickets for your shows? Oh, it's just at countrysingersarerobots.com. Sounds good. Who's not going to that website? Most visited website of 2023.

Starting point is 00:02:31 What else? What else? What else am I going to get hate for? Oh, I got one. You guys are annoying when it gets a little bit warm out. This is only going for Midwestern states and maybe only downtown, but bro, if it's one of those days

Starting point is 00:02:50 where it's like 60 degrees, randomly, every fucking restaurant packed, people drunk as fuck, noon, it's Monday. Guys! Act like you've seen the sun fucking dogs barking on on porches till 2 a.m

Starting point is 00:03:13 hey it's just a warm day it's not the last day on earth all right i don't know man maybe it's not the last day on earth alright I don't know man maybe it's just me kinda feel like a dick but I mean chill oh my god let's oh my god we should

Starting point is 00:03:42 just cause it's warm shut up Oh my God, let's, oh my God, we should. Just because it's warm? Shut up. Let's hear yours. What's the thing you'd get a lot of hate for if you said it out loud? Listen, I know I'm going to get some shit for saying this, but I'm just going to say fuck it and say it anyway. Can we shorten the fucking national anthem, bro?

Starting point is 00:04:02 For real? Listen, God bless the USA. Listen, I love America as much as the next guy. But holy hell, that's a long ass song. I was at the patient game at night, dude. And they were like, please stand and remove your hats for the playing of the national anthem. Brother, I started sweating before the bitch was over. Can we get like a remix?

Starting point is 00:04:22 A little fucking cliff note version. I mean, I'm not trying to sound like a dick but fuck no dude that makes oh please dude if you're somebody that's like no this is america shut up shit changes man make that shit words. No wonder people were taking a knee during the anthem. It's fucking two hours long. Jesus Christ. I don't blame anybody for sitting during the national anthem. Yo, that's exhausting. Are you protesting?

Starting point is 00:05:03 No, I just got a leg cramp because this shit's two hours long. Oh, I'm like, this is the worst part of the fucking game, dude. Don't that's why, you know what? Deep down. I think that's why I go to games so late. games so late dude if it's if people that are people how about the people that are so over the national anthem like it gets towards the end and they're like you know how about the first person that did that what a trailblazer for the rest of society in america at like sporting events. There's always somebody in the crowd that's like, the first guy that did that ballsy. What a chief.

Starting point is 00:05:59 What a fucking leader. What a trendsetter. Just some drunk guy. The bum's bursting in air. Let's go Colts! Yeah! Gave proof through the night. Dude. night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night night

Starting point is 00:06:25 night night night night night night night night

Starting point is 00:06:43 night night night night night night night night night that our flag was still there and the camera guys just fucking people crying and shit. Shut the fuck up. Cry during the national anthem. Get a life like it's the first time you ever heard it. This is beautiful. Shut up, dude. How about it? Like JV high school football games. They just put like a instrumental like fucking sounds like a literal chicken is in the press box on the microphone and everybody's all serious and shit take your helmets off who gives a shit dude can we just play

Starting point is 00:07:39 audio is all bad all the cheerleaders like it's the most serious thing they've ever done in their life dude when a cheerleader hears a national anthem she's fucking locked in ha i'm like guys easy it's just a song dude saluting to the skies cheerleaders when they hear the national anthem like god damn bro loosen up it's so crazy to me hey let's just play probably yeah kick it off okay let's keep going here's something i believe and i think most people agree i know it's not nice yes it's shitty it's really mean i can't wait could never say it to anybody i know but i don't care about your kids yeah i don't care at all about your kids most people you know

Starting point is 00:08:47 don't care about your kids nobody does they're kind of cute and they're a baby but all babies look the fucking same thank you and then they're just annoying bro i love this we don't care just make a page for them like people do not that I would know about it. Like people do with their pets. Just make a page for Xander's like, Hey, for the nine people that care about Caden, here's the page.

Starting point is 00:09:16 This is so funny to me. I don't know who needs to hear this, but nobody gives a shit about your kids. Dude. How about those people that are so annoying that they have you seen this they'll like show you a picture of their kids from their wallet you're like dude i don't give a fuck your kid what what okay what's his name i don't oh whoops i don't know because i don't give a shit about your kid there's more i

Starting point is 00:09:45 guess maybe i should try to find some common ground i mean we both like playing with toys you know we're messy eaters yeah we both cry when we don't get the taste so fried dude i love this podcast oh that's some fam shit you guys get it you guys get it god damn oh my god have you seen this picture of my shut up oh my god it's so dude sometimes I start laughing when people show me pictures of their kids. I'm like, what do you want me to fucking do with that? And then you put the person in a weird situation too. Cause what am I supposed to now? I got to call your kid cute and shit. That's weird. Oh, I don't know what the fucking say about your kid. Oh, sick. know what to fucking say about your kid oh sick your kid looks tight as fuck like i don't know that's like some shit i say your kid looks dope i don't fucking know what this sick kid bro

Starting point is 00:10:56 does he eat and stuff my god oh yeah my son he I don't give a fuck god damn keep going it's so funny so uh I've had chlamydia three times I know I know wear a condom I don't fucking like them

Starting point is 00:11:18 I don't like them who's wearing condoms seriously god damn everybody went on a little condom streak, right? But I mean, it's just such a, uh, let me do this. Let me do the weirdest thing ever before we do the weirdest thing ever. Let's just double down on that. Well, hell yeah. Wait, wait, wait, wait, ever let's just double down on that well hell yeah wait wait wait wait wait let me do the weirdest thing ever while i'm naked and you too i'm uncomfortable around women especially when i'm putting a condom on. I'm uncomfortable naked around.

Starting point is 00:12:14 Women, and I've got to do the weirdest thing before we do the weirdest thing. Yeah, I'm uncomfortable even talking about doing the weirdest thing before I do the weirdest thing. Damn. Three times though, big dog. My dude's been to CVS a lot. Minute Clinic. Dude, Minute Clinic, fucking MVP, bro. MVP, bro. Every Sunday morning at 6 a.m. Man, those minute clinics hurt, though. You know what I mean? It's just such a bitch.

Starting point is 00:12:57 You're like, ah, shit, I should, you know what? Because me, as a normal U.S. citizen, guilty conscious conscience, had a stroke. Every time i've ever had sex i think i have something after it doesn't matter every time i'm like she's pregnant and i have 15 stds going to cvs tomorrow and then the one you find the only available like appointment is the one in like two and a half hours away you're like okay i guess i'm going to fucking Shelbyville on Sunday morning Jesus Christ don't get your results back for four and a half months you're like oh by then who even gives a shit what I'm saying is don't ever have sex let's keep going I don't give a fuck about your preferred pronouns you're either a guy or a girl

Starting point is 00:13:48 it is a lot i'm like dude i can't even remember your damn name you want me to remember all these fucking other things too jesus who do you think you are i don't care it's like it's like the biggest joke too everybody's like he she it and it's like dude I don't even fucking like that went right by me I was like yeah not not doing that has there ever been something that

Starting point is 00:14:17 you're just like I'm not doing that no matter what it is or how important that's me with taxes that's me with like that's me with taxes. That's me with like, that's me with so many things. I'm like not doing that. That's me with a taxes. That's me with budgeting. I'm like, yeah, I'll just figure it out because I'm not doing that. Pronouns. I'm like, I don't know. I'm just, yeah, I'll just call you your name if I know it. And if not, I'll be like, hey, that's what I'll do.

Starting point is 00:14:49 Who the fuck? Bro, some of these things, you guys are so right. Let's keep going. Things that you would get a lot of hate for if you said them out loud. I would get a lot of hate for saying that i'm neutral when it comes to politics because so many people identify with what they politically believe in and i don't care about any of that oh god is this like normal? That's normal, right? Dude, imagine picking a side. I'm like, hey, I'd rather just not know about any of it because it's all so fucking boring. Is that normal? Is there a group of people that just aren't given a fuck about?

Starting point is 00:15:38 Dude, if you think of someone that knows nothing about like politics or history, think even like, think way less than that. And that's me. No fucking clue. Right or left. I'm like, I have no idea. I barely even know what right and left is like on my hands and shit. No fucking clue. I don't care. Last thing I care about. How could you ever care about it? Dude, anytime anybody starts talking about that shit, I'm like, guess I'm not listening. I start laughing. Well, I think I'm like, dude, you don't know shit. And it's pointless to talk about. Dude, people just talk about it because there's nothing else to talk about.

Starting point is 00:16:28 I hate it. Same with sports and shit like that. They're like, oh, did you see? I'm like, dude, not for me. Not for me. I know there's a secret society of fucking political morons out there. And I think it's everybody on this podcast. Like, you might think you know, but you don't. You don't know shit about it

Starting point is 00:16:46 and you don't want to know shit about it. Just be your true self and join the Espresso fam. Hey, this is a secret society of people that don't know shit. But we know a lot of shit, but we don't know shit that we don't care about that shit.

Starting point is 00:17:04 Bring it in. let's just talk about muffins and shit like that stuff that matters i don't fucking love this let's keep going oh shit something i'd get hate for is whiskey tastes like shit it all does it tastes like shit it doesn't matter what fucking kind it is. It doesn't matter if it's rye. It doesn't matter if it's fucking aged in the blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. It all tastes like shit. I'm a bartender. People always ask me for fucking whiskey recommendations. No idea. Couldn't tell you unless you want to taste something that tastes like shit. Then I know exactly what to give you all of to taste something that tastes like shit.

Starting point is 00:17:46 Then I know exactly what to give you. All of it. It all tastes like shit. It's so true. And if you're going to defend whiskey and be like, no, you're just lying to yourself. It tastes like shit. Do I drink it? Yeah, because someone brainwashed me and told me it was good.

Starting point is 00:18:03 And now I started thinking that it was OK. It all tastes like shit. Wine tastes like shit. Any alcoholic drink tastes like shit. Coffee tastes like shit. Hey, it all tastes like shit. Whiskeykey especially, and it's brown. Those people that are like, you know what, this is smoky. Shut up. Tastes like shit. It does.

Starting point is 00:18:37 I love to just get in an argument with somebody that doesn't think that tastes like shit. You have to have, like have, you must bleach your mouth every night you go to sleep and just all your taste buds are just burnt you have no taste buds you permanently have covid if you think whiskey tastes good no this this always with a mustache that curls and one of those fucking flat caps like you're annoying dude but sometimes i do kind of feel like drinking some shit on the rocks for some reason dude it's just the way they do it maybe

Starting point is 00:19:18 you know they take that they slice the orange and they drop it in there. It's all the other shit I like besides the whiskey. I'll take an old fashioned because I'm not at all. Just old. Dude, they throw the bitters in there. They throw the fucking cherry in there. throw the fucking cherry in there they throw the orange in there they throw the all the other stuff that's what that's the only reason it tastes good facts whiskey on the rocks the only reason i drink that is because i drink everything in 16 seconds

Starting point is 00:19:58 whiskey on the rocks tastes like shit so bad i'll drink it for two hours because i'm like oh my every fucking oh jesus christ yeah yeah you're really sipping on that whiskey yes because it tastes disgusting she's right something that i think i would get a lot of hate for is saying that I don't think it's acceptable for grownups to cry a lot. Or when women are like, oh, I'm such a cry baby. Or this made me cry. Or I cry at least twice a week.

Starting point is 00:20:38 I just don't think that's acceptable. Crying is for babies. It's for children. Grow up. That's acceptable. Crying is for babies. It's for children. Grow up.

Starting point is 00:20:49 If you really get overwhelmed that easily so often that you cry, you know, and you're in your 20s, 30s, whatever, you got problems. And honestly, it's just childish. So grow up. Stop crying. I love this so much. If you're crying all the time, you're a fucking bitch or you're drunk.

Starting point is 00:21:17 Oh yeah. Dude, crying as an adult just sounds like this. You know, you do that before something that's just you crying, crying as a kid turns into this as an adult. Okay. Let's do it. You could do anything in your entire life. It could be the most fun thing ever as an adult, but I will before it, I will cry before it. Yeah, bro. We're going to hang out with LeBron James. Yep. We're playing video games with him and eating a bunch of fudge rounds while Drake's playing. It's just us. Yeah. We're just, we're just going. He invited us. He's really excited. You want to go? I'd be like this. What time does it start? I'll see if I can make it.

Starting point is 00:22:15 Every time before everything. You don't cry. And as adult, you sigh. Sighing is the new crying. Sighing is the new crying. I probably do that 30 times during the day. I cry 30 times during the day. It's a grown man cry. And I'm going to keep doing it. But yeah, actual crying. Don't get me wrong. I've cried.

Starting point is 00:22:53 I've cried. I'm not, I'm not anti-cry, but I always do it when I'm a little fucked up. You know, you just get a little too, you get a little too, uh, you're a little too excited get a little too into it that's me or before i go to bed it's always it's always got to be dark when i cry for sure i've never cried in daylight no way what a risky move but if it's dark had a few drinks and rocky fours on. Give me a paper towel, girl. I'm going to be patting down the eyes a little bit. You're going to hear a little bit of this. That cry breath, dude. Cry breath is so funny. You're like done crying, but like somebody says something to you and you're like, that cry breath. She still has cry breath. I'd wait probably an hour before you talk to her.

Starting point is 00:23:56 How about how fragile people are before and after they cry? After they cry, she just got done crying. How about after you're done crying? It's so visible. she just got done crying how about after you're done crying it's so visible just go up to people just cry oh your eyes just kind of look like you're sad really sad no let's keep going taylor swift is trash and philly cheesesteaks are a travesty to food. Yeah. What the fuck? I don't really, I can't really judge singers because I don't know shit about it.

Starting point is 00:24:32 And I just think if you're different and creative and shit, anybody can be good at stuff and you got to work hard, obviously. But, uh, like there's really bad, there's really trash singers that are like popular. So I'm like, I don't know how they do it,

Starting point is 00:24:50 but they're doing it. So I can't judge on that, but damn, she does have some heaters though, bro. I feel you on that, but she does have some heaters. Standing in the nighttime. does have some heaters. Standing in the night time. In your wildest dreams.

Starting point is 00:25:14 You can't tell me that's trash. You see me in hindsight. Burning it down. I used to work out to that song. And cry. What? But Philly cheesesteaks, bro. Okay.

Starting point is 00:25:39 Whenever it's got the city's name in the title of the dish, it's not good. It's not good, one, because people from Philadelphia Philadelphia, fuck you. If you don't like it, like I guarantee if there was an Indianapolis, something Indianapolis tenderloin or some shit like that, I would never fucking eat it. And if people said they didn't like it, I'd be like, yeah, it's cause it's from here. Zero. I have zero allegiance. Philly cheesesteak. I'm like, you just mean the meal you're going to eat that's going to put you to sleep for six hours

Starting point is 00:26:16 and turn you into trash for the rest of the day? That's what a Philly cheesesteak is. How do you eat a Philly cheesesteak and then do anything after that? I'd have to eat a Philly cheesesteak at 11 59 and go to sleep at midnight just a just a bunch of cheese and steak inside a fucking piece of bread good lord was it my last meal? Who's out here eating that? Eatin' up if you're from Philly! Shut up, dude.

Starting point is 00:27:01 Anything. Chicago style pizza! Sucks. Sucks. dude. Anything. Chicago style pizza sucks. The only thing good from any city is like a Santa Fe salad. Those are heat. There's a Santa Fe salad at every restaurant in the country and I get it every time. I'm like, oh, with the little tortilla strips. Give me that shit. I might just fuck around and move to Santa Fe. I'm like you guys have the salad here they're like what are you talking about fuck i moved out i moved my whole entire family to santa fe because i love your salad so much what do you know the one with the corn and the black beans we have no idea what you're talking

Starting point is 00:27:38 about talking to the governor of santa fe let's keep going Hey, Benedict, this is a great question. It's on the level of most intrusive thoughts, parts one and two. I love you. I would say that something I would never say out loud because I'd probably get in trouble for it is that I think that Beyonce is a hundred percent overrated, even though I did love Destiny's Child, I think Beyonce's overrated. And then number two is that I can't stand Taylor Swift. As a 32 year old woman, I feel like I'm supposed to love her, but I can't stand her. I get it. I get it. I get it. Yeah. Beyonce is, to me,

Starting point is 00:28:28 I think she's just loud as fuck. When I hear a Beyonce song, I'm like, God, Taylor Swift is just like crying, bro, but they know what they're doing. They do.

Starting point is 00:28:43 They know what they're doing. You got to get them. You got to get you got you got to get them credit for that but beyonce is loud i'm like oh man it's just in every song it's like adele vibes it's just very dramatic and loud and i'm like too much it's too much bro i could never enjoy one of those songs i'm just like it's it is it just like, it's weighing on me too heavy. You ever listen to a song and you're like, oh, I'm having fun.

Starting point is 00:29:10 Like Beyonce songs, I'm just like, I feel like I have to pay attention to this. I'm like, yeah. Like when Beyonce sings, I'm like, I better get out my notepad and like, you know, be studious and attentive. It's just like, you know, be studious and attentive. It's just, it's just like, it's too much. I like light, fun fucking music that you can just, everyone's cool with. Imagine

Starting point is 00:29:33 being at a party and playing like a Beyonce song. People would be like, Hey, can you, can we just hang out? Why does everything have to be so serious we just taylor swift it's just like that's music you listen to alone you can't listen to taylor swift and beyonce in a crowd of people bro taylor swift you listen to by yourself in your headphones while you're working out and going through a breakup. It's exactly what I did. Look at me now. Big piece of shit.

Starting point is 00:30:13 And then I went on a reality TV show. So you're right. Yeah, they're hard to listen to. For me. But you're right. Destiny Child fucking slappersppers let's keep going definitely gonna get a lot of shit for this one but unpopular opinion arby's is a good restaurant fight me i i heard one weird thing about arby's and i told myself I'd never go back and I haven't.

Starting point is 00:30:48 They do make it look good though. Arby's knows what they're doing. It's like a different style of restaurant. Like you got to give them credit for being like, Hey, let's just make a restaurant around roast beef. Cause roast beef is already like has a bad rap. You know, roast beef because roast beef is already like has a bad rap you know roast beef is already like it's like your fourth choice at a deli if i'm being real you walk into a deli you're like definitely turkey's my number one uh ham two actually no ham's three and then like the shredded chicken breast is two uh three ham four you're like anything besides roast beef you guys have anything but instant okay roast beef roast beef is weird and like like you know it's got the whole vagina thing tied together with it. It's just like, and Arby's was like, fuck it.

Starting point is 00:31:48 Let's do it. Let's make all these restaurants about roast beef. That's crazy. And they made it. They made it. They made it like they put it on that bun with the onions on it. It's a badass bun. And to serve that at a fast food place and then they're like we need

Starting point is 00:32:07 something we need something to like blow the roof off this place if we're gonna sell just roast beef we need the next best thing to go on that just a bunch of fucking nacho cheese and then we need something else too that they they can add to dude. Arby's is so different. When you think about it, what kind of sauce should we have? Oh, we'll just, we'll just call it horsey's sauce. The first time someone was like, can I get some horsey sauce? I was like, what the fuck is that? Don't come, don't ask for horsey sauce like you know what it is. Like anytime you ask for horsey sauce,

Starting point is 00:32:52 you should kind of stumble on it a little bit or throw a question mark at the end. Do you guys have that like horsey sauce or whatever? That's what you should ask. That's how you should ask every time because nobody knows what the fuck it is. But if you put that on a beef and cheddar, on that bun with the onions,

Starting point is 00:33:13 it's not making it home. That shit's going down in the car on the way. And you're doing one of these too. It's disgusting, but you only do it in your car because there's a little bit of cheese on your thumb horsey sauce on the crotch of your pants because you're eating a bunch in the head they've got the the the fries with the curly dude they've got the slinky fries it's not that bad of a place The fries with the curly... Dude, they've got the slinky fries?

Starting point is 00:33:48 It's not that bad of a place. It's not. But somebody told me they make their roast beef by just putting a liquid package into a machine for 15 minutes and then it dings and you open the machine and it's solid and they slice that up and put it on your roast beef. And after I heard that, I was like, it's true. So when I go to Arby's, I'm strictly a bitch. Strictly business.

Starting point is 00:34:18 I get a vanilla shake. You don't even get Jamocha? No. Because I'm not my friend's mom i get a vanilla shake and i get a cherry turnover and dr dip is coming to the party i'm dr dip with a lot of shit doc dip that'd be my that's my Dip? That's my villain, dude. That's my villain name, Dr. Dip.

Starting point is 00:34:48 And I wear goggles and I just fucking dip. It'd be like a Spider-Man villain kind of. And I dip him in hard shell chocolate. And he's just fucking... Oh no! What happened to Spider-Man? Oh shit, he's covered in chocolate shell with sprinkles all over him who could have done it i'm on top of a building dunking a turnover into a shake

Starting point is 00:35:18 it's warm this is cold I made an Arby's tornado. It's not that bad. Arby's isn't that bad, except for the whole meat thing. They do a good job, bro. They know what they're doing. The whole campaign, we got the meats and shit. It's pretty good. I agree with them. I think all fast food is just fucking fire though. give me the worst fast food place i'm like i'll find something i'll find something what's the worst fat white castle those chicken rings come on last one yo yo yo benny boy Yo, Benny boy. The hub. Fuck. Let's go.

Starting point is 00:36:13 Tea tastes like hot toilet water. I said it. I said it. I love this. And Dunkin' Donuts is overrated as fuck. Love you, bro. Oh, man. I fucking love this guy. I feel like we're all friends everybody that listens to this podcast man can we just meet up

Starting point is 00:36:32 and all fucking eight-way kiss only eight people no i'm kidding all of us bro but uh yeah tea isn't good for sure coffee's not either no none of it's good you just drink it because you got nothing else to do tea tastes like hot toilet water every time i've never had tea and been like oh you know what actually there's one tea that uh that medicine ball shit from starbucks that shit slaps when you're sick. I love, I like, I might get sick on purpose just to order that. Give me a triple venti medicine ball. Dude, I'll, I'll spend $8,000 when I'm sick on all the shit. Every time I'm sick, I'm like, I need the orange juice that's freshly squeezed. Squeeze it in front of me right now. I'll give you an $800 tip. That fresh squeezed orange juice, like from the store when you're sick.

Starting point is 00:37:27 It's like a market though. Not a store. You can't go to Meijer and get fresh. It's like, you got to go to like a market and it's just like, it's the fret and like, Oh God, the bottles always like real nice. Bro. It's a best tasting shit, but that I'll go tobucks right after venti medicine ball bro it's just like it's i don't know what kind of tea it is it's like it's got honey lemon there's a little i don't know

Starting point is 00:37:58 what it did it's just so fucking good it's the best tasting tea i've ever had it's probably because it's all it's just it's literally half honey I'm just drinking a cup of honey cup of warm honey there's nothing there's no tea in it that's the best tea I've ever had all other tea though I'm like like matcha tea I'm like this is disgusting I just feel like I'm drinking like plant water. That's what it is. The water in the bottom of your vase of your flowers warmed up. Tea. Yeah, I drink it.

Starting point is 00:38:37 Wait, what else did he say? Yo, like hot toilet water. I said it. I said it. I said it. And Dunkin' Donuts is overrated as fuck. Love you, bro. Love you more. I mean, what?

Starting point is 00:38:55 No, Dunkin' Donuts is, it is not good. Dunkin' Donuts is just begging, begging somebody to say, hey, just don't sell donuts anymore because nobody's hey who's buying this who's going to dunkin donuts and buying donuts you got to be a sick twisted bitch to go to dunkin donuts and get a dozen don't who if i saw those out i'd be like who the fuck uh is this for a video nobody's really buying donuts at dunkin donuts i don't even think it's called dunkin now yeah they they rebranded so hard i kind of feel bad for them sometimes and i just always hear about like the serve the people are

Starting point is 00:39:38 just trash at dunkin donuts the coffee's not even that great. I feel like their coffee makes me have to piss more than like any other drink ever like this. Like, yeah, it's, I don't know, but it feels like Dunkin' Donuts is like, and I'm just pissing all day.

Starting point is 00:40:03 Like one sip of Dunkin' Donuts iced coffee, and I'm like, ah. Like weird people are always drinking Dunkin' Donuts too, you know? Like a lady that wears too much like eye makeup. You know, like every day she's like super like makeup, like ready. I'm like, why?

Starting point is 00:40:21 Just relax. You don't have to match your eyeshadow with your shoes, Rebecca. She's always like, Duncan, biggest drink, dude. It's like the gas station, big jug thing of coffee. Damn, Becky, chill out, Becky. Chill out. Relax. Getting up to go pee every fucking 15 seconds. Becky's walking to the bathroom again. Got heels on matching her eyeshadow.

Starting point is 00:41:03 You know those ladies that wear heels that sound like a fucking steel hammer. Becky's coming back from the bathroom. Sounds like a Clydesdale. Jesus Christ, dude. Just relax. It's too much. Listening to Beyonce and Taylor Swift at the same time. Two different headphones, two different phones.

Starting point is 00:41:28 She's the loudest woman in the world. That's who drinks Dunkin' Donuts. Yo, we got to get out of here. Dude, I love you guys. I love this podcast. I love the fam. I love this shit so much, man. Thank you for listening.

Starting point is 00:41:49 I'll see you guys in Ontario, California. And if not, it's too bad. You got to go. But all right, I'll talk to you guys next week. Love you. See you next time.

Espresso - opinions you get HATE for

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