Everything Is Content - Everything In Conversation : The Age Of Attraction

Episode Date: March 31, 2026

Hello EICreatures, we're back, and so are TV producers! Did we ask for another dating show? No! Did we get one? YES!Netflix says ‘Age of Attraction is throwing out the rulebook — and birthdates — singles build connections based purely on chemistry, compatibility, and an undeniable spark that has nothing to do with the year they graduated from high school. In this dating experiment, there’s only one question they can’t ask: 'How old are you?’'Filmed in Whistler Canada, the 40 singles meet at a retreat and take part in different activities to get to know each other… if they feel a special connection they can go to the 'promise room', exchange rings and commit to each other before they reveal their age to each other…Ellie Muir for the independent writes it's ‘an Oedipus complex disguised as a dating show’ ‘Age, surprise surprise, turns out to be a bit more than that. Mommy and daddy issues are always the elephant in the room here, but rarely interrogated. The younger women lament the "immature" men in their own generation and seek out someone older with financial stability, while the older men — most of them with children from previous relationships — definitely signed up to this show with the sole intention of securing a 20-something girlfriend.’ Has the pendulum swung back on the stigma around age gap relationships? Or does this show prove that they can indeed be very tricky territory?We hope you enjoy, as always please do rate, review and follow the show on your podcast player app! O, R, B xxAge Of AttractionNetflix’s Age of Attraction is an Oedipus complex disguised as a dating showThe Myth of the 25-Year-Old Brain Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I'm Beth. I'm Ruchera and I'm In Oni and this is Everything in Conversation. The pre-game before Friday's main episode. We'd love you to take part in these conversations and we love when you agree and disagree with us. So you can give us those by following us on Instagram at Everything Us Content Pod

and that's where we decide on topics and open the floor for all of your opinions. TV producers are back at it again. So Netflix says The new show, Age of Attraction, is throwing out the rulebook and birth dates. Singles build connections based purely on chemistry, compatibility, and an undeniable spark that has nothing to do with the year they graduated from high school. In this dating experiment, there's only one question they can't ask.

How old are you? That bit even just really makes me laugh because it's like building connections based purely on chemistry compatibility. It's not like what we always do. Anyway. Filmed in Whistler Canada, the 40 singles meet at a retreat and take part in. different activities to get to know each other. If they feel a special connection, they can go to the Promise Room and exchange rings

and commit to each other before they reveal their ages to each other. Ellie Muir for the Independent writes, it's an Oedipus Complex disguised as a dating show. Age, surprise, surprise, turns out to be a bit more than that. Mummy and Daddy issues are always the elephant in the room here, but rarely interrogated. The younger women lament the immature men

in their own generation and seek out someone older with financial stability. while the older men, most of them were children from previous relationships, definitely signed up to the show with the sole intention of securing a 20-something girlfriend. Beth, you brought this show to us, so let's start with you. Were you excited about the premise, and how do you feel about it now that you've watched it? I was excited by the premise. I think a few years ago, I don't think you could have made this show.

There was such an insanity around the discourse relating to age gaps. I was excited because I think we do need sensible, interesting media about the different ways that people do have relationships. I was absolutely, I mean, I was into it. I think my interest probably peaked when they were all revealing the ages because that was just the most exciting thing. I mean, you do have, we all have eyes. So we're watching the show and you can see, okay, age gap, I know who's older.

It is a difference of a few years apart from one couple where he turned out to be 60. I thought he was maybe 48 and she was 27. She loved him anyway for a brief time. as the show went on it got slightly more boring and slightly less. I basically think any dating show that doesn't have some kind of expert panel

any kind of option for therapy or guidance la maths. Maths is doing, the one show is doing this well is kind of redundant immediately. It's just people getting into a mess for no, like there's no guidance and this in particular,

when you are someone who has an age gap, you do need guidance. The point that these things fail is they don't know how to relate to each time. other that isn't that outside influence that isn't invested just in ratings saying like have you tried this have you talked about this they are just sort of fighting so lost interest a little bit but fascinating that this show got made yeah i just finished the episode where hordeaux reveals that he's 60 to his 27 year old girlfriend and i gasped i actually gasped and she gasped

as well and she goes it is so crazy i completely agree with you i thought he was going to be 48 or something. He looked amazing. Can we read Hillary's message really quickly on that? Because Hillary said, not to be ages, but I clocked the six year old the moment he tried to get up off that log, which is a moment I went back to where okay, you go, you are moving. And also he

says, golly a few times, which I thought maybe in the UK you would go golly is a very older thing to say, but I thought, oh well maybe America it's slightly different, but he was creaking up off that log and saying golly, we should have seen that coming. Yeah, so I do think they did cause well because the older one

did look very good for the age, I have to say. So there was that. But I'm going to run you through the couples if you haven't watched it. So we have Vanel, who's 27 with Jorge, who's 60. Teresa, who's 57 with John, who's 27. Libby, who's 22, with Andrew, who's 38. Vanessa, who's 49 with Logan, who's 29.

Fifer, who's 23 with Derek, who's 43. And Leah, who's 41 with Chris, who's 26. So they are a lot between like kind of 15 to... How many years was it? 35. 33 was... 33. Yeah, 33.

It's a whole me. It's big. And so basically, they're the only ones that progressed through. I've got to halfway through episode six. I actually think it gets better as it goes on. But what it really starts to reveal is that maybe age does matter. Like when they're in the kind of the retreat thing that they're doing and it's just they're on a date and the whole rest of the world doesn't exist.

And I was getting such a nick from these men when the girls are revealing their ages. And these young women are going, oh, I hope they don't mind that we're doing. in my 20s and the men are obviously like, I don't mind at all. Of course you don't mind. And I just found it fascinating to watch, but also I found it quite unsettling. I have to say it. And it annoys me because I, as in, I annoy myself because I understand that lots of people have interesting dynamics across different ages.

But I do often just think I don't like it when it's a man who's older. And we did get a message from Briney who said, it feels like it's validating predatory dynamics during a scary era for women and girls and when you've progressed further, Ruchera, Jorge is just not a nice man. Oh no, really? No.

So there's a big thing with Vinal where she says, look, I've decided that I want to save myself for marriage now. I have done it before, but I... And he's like, that's fine, I don't mind. And she says to him, like, would you ever want to have children? And he's like, well, I would, but not outside of marriage because I wouldn't want a baby mama. And she did ask him before that if he had kids

and he didn't react. Later on, they go to this different scene where all the couples are together and she's like, they're all asking each other about their partners and she's saying it's great because Jorge doesn't have any kids. Then it goes on later and he kind of goes to a little scream with him and he's like, look, I didn't want to tell her

if that I had children then, because I wanted to see how she reacted to my age. He reveals he does have children. One of his daughters is literally exact same age as her. Oh gosh. And then he kind of reveals he's actually not that comfortable

with her being celibate. It's just, and it's kind, it feels, starts to feel very, predatory and gross and I really didn't like it but that's why I actually kind of respected the show in a way because I guess it's not glorifying these age gap relationships of anything it's cementing further what people were getting a bit puritanical about that's interesting that's interesting that they didn't shy away from it rather than being like this is an amazing you know love is blind type thing where like it

really doesn't matter if people have different age groups actually it can just be really really bad. I also just found a lot of the couples I could kind of roughly guess their ages or near about. And the one that kind of surprised me in terms of I don't get how they were not on the money was Libby being 22 and then her partner being 38. And he seemed really shocked. And I was like she really feels young. She feels like bubbly, Taylor Swifty, young woman like finding herself bubbly. She just felt 22 to me. Like she felt 22 and I don't know if it's a case of age doesn't matter. attracted the people you are, but I really felt how young she was. And that's the thing I often struggle with in these dynamics when it is like a near 40 year old dating

early 20s person. And to be fair to him, he says that she is the youngest person he's ever dated. But he does often go for younger women. So I wonder if that's just late 20s. But I do wonder, especially as somebody who looks really young, and I have dated one person before in their 40s, watching that play out, I was like, does that, do people not feel the youngness of people and does that not like come through when you're dating them that they feel just like a lot different to you and I just I wonder about that I'm not coherently explaining myself but do you get what I'm saying I think so I think it is you when you are the younger party or when there's never really been a big age gap you don't think at the time god do I feel young to them

because you go we are equals you see them as equals but then as you get old you think even me and a 22 year old I would my assumption would be you would feel young that you have only had four years acts of adult experience, I would have paused with that, a 30-year-old man who's got a 14-year-old daughter and she's 22. And I knew the premise is he didn't know before he made this connection. This is the point. They connected on everything else. Plausibly, she could have been 29. Of course, she doesn't look 29 or at 29. But that was the point. What does it feel like and how does it feel okay? I think Fyfer and her partner have a similar thing. You know, she's getting upset or she's getting

a bit like her parents are coming and she's really awkward. And I'm like, that is how I was. She's 23. That's how awkward I was at that age. he's a father and I just think you would feel paternal. I do, yeah, I find it very interesting. Also, on the Libby and Andrew thing, it's interesting because she knows that his daughter is 14, I think. And then when he says to he's 38, she's really surprised. And I was thinking, how old could he really be to have a 14-year-old?

Like, you're going to have to, well, you don't have to be, but that's 24 is pretty young to have a child. Maybe it's not in the US, I don't know. But I was surprised at how much she hadn't considered that that would potentially be his age. And I think the children of it all is what really throws me off. So Teresa really grapples with this. She has a child that's older than John. And she kind of talks about that.

But the men are kind of like, oh, well, it's okay that my kids are like the same age as the women. And I do think I'm the same as you, Beth Amritory, where I feel, if someone feels significantly younger than me, I just, a maternal gene just switches on. I feel a bit grossed out. I feel like they're a child. I don't think men have that.

I think men find it attractive. I think they genuinely find it attractive when women seem young and bubbly and perhaps not jaded and whatever. we are in our 30s cross. Cynical hags. Angry. The things I don't bark with now

because I know not to part with them, the list is enormous and it only takes a man who is like, well, I agree that is really unfair. I think certain men like to get away with things and you can before experience. And I mean, some of them, it's not to say that it can't work, but I do just, I do just get an ick

and I don't as much with the women, which is maybe wrong. Same, yeah. I know, I really like Theresa, I like how Theresa and is it John. Yeah. I like how they're navigating it. I think it is marketed different

to how the older men and the younger women are navigating. I think the women in all cases are really trying to be smart and sensible. But John and Teresa, a really special case where she's not doing it necessarily how other people would. She's not telling her children up front how old he is. She really wants them to get to know him as well. But she's really level-headed. She's like there is a stigma against women. But he seems properly switched on.

We got a message from Harriet who said, as someone in an age gap relationship of 17 years, I've learned that all that matters is common values and common outlook on life being matched by your values. is absolutely key and they are I mean he doesn't want children she has her children he they seem to get have shared interest they're sexually compatible he is 27 years old why would this man not know what he's attracted to looking at her me she looks fantastic but she's clearly in her 50s he saw her he wanted her they are now dating on the show nothing in me feels an ick about that at all also because she very clearly goes to him look do you want to have children because that is not

something I can give you. Like I am past that age and he's like I've never really want a kid. Like I've watched it just I don't want them. She was like well if you did what if you did want them like that could change and he's like I don't want children she's like I guess we could adopt like this is a conversation that happens versus Jorge and Vanel and she's saying she does want to have children she's young so you know like he's 60 so like how long is he going to be alive to be looking after these kids anyway and then he has the audacity of not telling her that he has a child her age. Like that is deceptive.

It's cruel. It's also like you're 60. That's too. Fair enough if you've fallen up someone on their 60 but she's she's a religious woman who's like made these things to God. And like if he talks about on the show they end up doing things which aren't sex and he kind of pushes her on how she can identify herself as celibate

if she's doing these other things. And he talks about it in a way that I don't think she would want that broadcast on the show. It feels like he's manipulating her into doing something else even though he's like chopping and switching and changing, it feels very wrong. Whereas, yeah, I think Theresa and John at the complete other end of that, all the men love to say you're really mature for your age.

This is such a red flag to me when people say this because it's like, if you're looking for maturity, find someone mature. Like, why do you need to find this woman who's really mature for their age? And they're not. And then they'll be like, you might not be as old,

but you've had life experiences. No, they haven't. They actually haven't had life experiences. And that's okay. That is precisely where they should be. But a woman of a certain age will feel that she has. and we'll feel because women are socialised too mature themselves up,

we can talk to, we can hold court with men that age. They will overlook things that an older woman probably wouldn't because she's looking at the health relationship. She's going, oh, I can't make this work. I'm finding it, it's challenging to me. And I'm very, I am open-minded. Really, anyone can find each other. I've got a message from Hannah saying,

when did Netflix become ITB2 derogatory? I think if you're going to make a show like Age of Attraction at the bare minimum, everyone should at least have a fully developed frontal cortex. I did some digging on this because I have heard this is sort of fake science it's like a factoid we have all run with the idea that your brain does develop at this age and it's kind of bunk like what we know of brain development

is really I love that part I know and so did I but it's not really true I read a piece for Slate actually it's become my personality yeah I say it all the time and it's a great way to just call creeps out but there's a piece in Slate by Jane C. Hugh called The Myth of the 25-year-old brain

and it's I will link it in the show notes It's really interesting. And she writes, maturity is a slippery concept, especially in neuroscience. A banana can be ripe or not, but there's no single metric to examine to determine a brain's maturity.

In many studies, though, neuroscientists define maturity at the point at which changes in the brain level off. This is the metric research is considered in determining that the prefrontal cortex continues developing into people's mid-20s. And she goes on to say, like, there's not really a plateau.

It keeps happening. And that's also just one error of the brain that signals maturity. There are other things that control language. and decision making that are not taken into, and I don't think we should ditch this completely. It's quite helpful to know that there are still, you rapidly mature, a lot of maturing grows on, and then it does plateau at a certain point. We don't know when that is, but I do, I was really disappointed to find out that wasn't as hard and fast. But I do think 25 is a very good cutoff

regardless of the science, as Hannah says. I'm going to unhear what you said specifically about that. But I think even just from my own experience, I genuinely feel like, and I say this all the time because it feels mad. I feel like between the age of 25 and 26, it's almost like within a few months, something just like clicked in my brain and I started feeling retrospectively guilty for so many things with my parents and just pouring over memories and just thinking about them in a different way. And suddenly it's almost like a developed morality. That's how I describe because it really felt like that. Yeah, I think I was. Evil which era. Yeah, I think I was. And also I guess back onto your point and only about just the kind of how this show has the example of Jorge and Vanel and the kind of

platform of exploitation and what you just said was awful frankly but I think that's the thing right at the beginning I felt like love is love and I felt really convinced and like really like in the show because of Teresa and John and I think they're so earnest and they come at it from such a really nice place but then there was a guy I can't remember what his name was and he said if he is dating somebody his mom's age she has to be as hot as his mom And that's when something clicked in me and I was like, oh, okay, so not every couple is equal here,

not every person is equal here in terms of their reasoning for being on the show. And I think that's the thing that makes this just feel slightly trashy. You've not got all the Torezes and Johns. You've also got some people who are just frankly saying absolute nonsense, Edipal style shit.

And then you've got the Jorge style of person who is just, it seems to be, taking advantage of that age dynamic, that gap, and actively just manipulating her. Yeah, that's why I really agree with that piece that I read at the top, because the other thing is the show is obviously cast people who have the desire to be in an age gap relationship. So it could be young men who maybe fetishize this kind of like mommy partner or older men or older women who want to date younger men. Either way, it's not an accident. It's not like you were on the tube and you had a meet you and then you went on a date and it turned out the guy was 20 years younger.

You signed up to a show where you're likely going to meet someone who is 15 to 20 years younger than you. And I did want to quickly go back to the frontal load thing because we had a mess for Millie going. I actually find it quite refreshing so long as everyone is in their late 20s plus. And I think even if it's not true, there is some cultural thing. And like you were saying, Ruchero,

you are different as you get older. Like I have said this so many times, I don't think you should be allowed to be on shows like love anything really in your early 20s. The decisions I was making, you do not, you're not risk of us. I mean, I'm covered in the decisions I was making. That is the least of my worries, tattoos.

Yeah. But I think that you just, I just don't think it should be televised. And I think, I've said this before, but my issue with age gaps is always the proximity to childhood that the youngest person is. Obviously, if someone's 30 and someone's 60, it doesn't really matter.

But with the Vannell thing and him, it did matter to me because of the, it felt like there was the power imbalance there. And we had an interesting master from Manam, which I agree with, which said, I've long held the belief that a 40-plus love island of hot people who got married young and then divorce

would be box office. It seems like we're going through every variant of love with these shows. why not have miserable jaded people try and match. And I think that that's a really good point. It's like why does everything have to have an angle? Like is this even, are these people even going in with good intentions? Like if you, do they must know the premise of the show?

People were saying, did they? Because everyone was theorising that maybe Libby, who's going out with a 38 year old, 22 year old, thought she was going on something like too hot to handle because she had all these really fun outfits. She was so bubbly that she'd arrive for like, hey, look, it's a new dating show. And she went, that's too hot to handle.

I'll be bang on that. And then she was like, and you're dating your father. That suddenly makes sense for why she's on this show. That suddenly makes sense. Well, the best bit is when all of her friends come. And so they do, in the thing in the fifth episode,

you kind of, what they do is the family gets introduced. So some people's parents come, and it's Libby's friends. And you can see his face. He's like, oh my God, I love it. I love them. And they're like, let's get a drink that in a bar.

And he suddenly goes, Zoom, she is 22. Like these girls want a party. Like they are having fun. Same generation as his 14-year-old, who soon will probably have that same energy and we'll want to dress up and have fun. And he's like, I see.

Yeah. So rough. We did get a message from Kat. I wanted to talk to you to her about this. So Kat said, I'm not a dating show girlie in general, so all of these are outside my universe, but it just seems outrageous.

All of these shite, click-baity heteroy ones get produced when the only one for queer people that was on the bebe, I kissed a boy girl, has been cancelled, which I know that you watched one or both. I kissed a girl. I watched I kiss a girl. I didn't know about I kissed a boy,

but I need to watch that this summer. I also found out about that news, posted it in a group of people that I know have watched every single episode, and I don't understand. There's a massive campaign to get it back. It's so bizarre. It's so bizarre.

I don't know why they've done this, because as far as I'm aware, I do believe viewership was really great. Culturally, you know, online, the internet responses to it were really great. I don't understand why they've done this. It's such a friend of mine was devastated. She was posting on stories that I cannot believe

they got rid of the show. And I remember you singing its praises and it being so nice and like really showing a really good example of like what relationships can be like. It does feel like how many other iterations are producers going to find ways to like put people together. What's the next one going to be?

I don't know. Because I don't think this was a good, like as, what was interesting was taking them from that situation. I think the most interesting episodes is the one when the outside world comes in because basically all of them go, maybe this won't work. It more felt like what they really wanted

was they wanted to shag because it was like a fun experience to like have a bit of a fling with someone but you try and export that into reality and maybe apart from Theresa and John are they still together? So listeners we are recording this a week ahead so tomorrow current time

we will know who broke up on the mountain so anyone listening will know if they want to know I will predict Theresa and John yeah I hope so I think Libby and her old man will go for a little bit longer and then never to be break up Do you think even though he had that moment of just being almost like, icked out by being with her friends and stuff?

I think so. I think he will be able to convince himself because she's great fun. She's beautiful. She's into it. She's saying she's into it. I think they'll go for a little bit longer. What about Fife and Derek? No, I think she,

because she's expressing doubts about, like she has to move to be with him and his kids from Skappel to Texas. So she's saying, I mean, it's an amazing moment actually, if anyone who hasn't watched, she's saying, I want to move, but I always told myself, she's 22, she said, I, 23. I always told myself I would never move for a man. To do this for you, I would have to cross my own boundaries.

And I thought, fuck, at 23, I was a fool. I would have done it. And I wouldn't have thought that, that she knows this of herself. I mean, it's both speaks to her maturity, but also her youth. This is the first time she's really been challenged by the reality of life and having to move for children. I actually just don't want a child, I'm sorry, I just don't want a 23-year-old to have to make those choices unless it really is worth it.

But you're asking a lot, aren't you? But it's really sweet because both her parents come and they're not together and she hasn't seen her parents together she said since she got like really tall off at school and so they meet Derek with her and the dad in the after like VT thing he cries and says I'm really proud like they really liked Derek and they were really fine with him being 43

and having kids which was really sweet yeah that was it both her parents were like I've never seen her be this relaxed with someone I've never seen her being this open they were like reacting to how she they didn't really care about him I don't think they were just reacting to that she seemed to like him which I thought was a really lovely

really lovely thing I think just like kind of grappling with it, I think we've spoken about age gaps before. And I do feel like for the most part, I do believe love is love, unless you are dating somebody dramatically younger in their, like, I think it's what you said, proximity to childhood. I think once you get past the like early 20s, I think you have your frontal lobe scientifically proven or not, and you can make those choices. But I do think the problem is when you're talking about heterosexual relationships, there are always a dynamic, there is quite often a dynamic. of predatory behavior. And I think that's why it's always been so much easier to look at queer relationships that have big age gaps

and to not feel that sense of, oh. But also, and I know this one's awful, but when these men have children, girls, not that far away, it makes me feel quite ill. Whereas weirdly, I don't care that Teresa's got a kid that's older than John. He's 29, John's 27. But it's when the men have daughters,

like the same age, I'm like, that, it gives me the heby-jeebies, and that's maybe not right of me. Maybe I am too puritanically minded. But I did think it was really complicated that they all had, basically all of the guys had kids. That is the older guys. For a 22-year-old,

I don't even think you should be asking someone to deal with that. I agree. I hope she chooses herself. I hope it's all very positive and like an experience that she won't regret, but I do, I find myself rooting for a lot of single young women

and just one 54-year-old and a 27-year-old hotie. I can't help. it. We've done this before but what's the oldest you go? I've dated someone I think 21 years older when I was 29 and I was fine but we didn't really date for long but I could see this could work but what's that I can't do mouse 50? 50 yeah nice and I just thought well look if this was the right person sure but it's hard there are immediately obstacles in so many ways that when you want to date so you'd have to really you know I think falling in love someone in your who's your age mate or like to me like eight years no biggie up

not down. Lucky, that's the person you want to fall in love with. Anyone older, I just think it does get, I'm just, not risk-converse, but I think I don't like a hard life. And it's really hard. That is fair enough. I feel like if we're talking about the age we are now,

probably like 50s is fine. I think dating down probably like, I think no younger than 27. Yeah. But even that. Even that is like, I think also because I haven't met anyone who's 27,

who I've been interested in but that's not like a never it's just like hard to imagine it I guess yeah I'd find it hard to find it hard to I wouldn't go that much lower I would be interested in dating someone much old like I'd be open to going on a date yeah but then I think if you do want to have kids

and stuff like that it's like really complicated if they're 70 when you're 40 and your kids too or whatever like that is something you've really got to think about quite quickly plenty of people do it but I just I get I just think it makes your life harder in ways I wouldn't be interested to have a hard life no

there's always someone there like I have someone in my life that when she I think was 20 married someone who was 50 but there really it's just like I just don't think it's as common but it happens but I don't think we need to force it into being a thing no agree I think that's it really when it happens and it's natural and you find two people who connect like power to them I'm not tuning in for making it thing for Netflix is not the way I think this is the first and last series I will be watching do you think that yeah I don't think that's interesting it's not are they going to do more no I don't think this is done very much I don't think this is done very very well has it? I don't know. I can't imagine it has. I think it really drops off. I think it's getting good viewers.

Like people are watching it, but I don't think it's... How could you come up for series two? You'd be like, oh, what? More age gap? The trailers were kind of the best thing, like the guy being like, yeah, if she's not as hot as my mum.

Oh, no, I want him to have his own show. Yeah. Well, I just want to follow around and see him interact with things. Like, Eidepal. We call it Eideple as fuck. Yeah. Eaterpa.

Yeah. Ew. Oh, dear. Thank you so much for listening this week. And for all of your opinions and takes on this topic. We genuinely read them all and they guide our discussions

and if we could read them all out we would do too but we can't. So please do you keep sending them in. Please also give us a follow on Instagram to get your messages in for every episode we do which is at Everything is ContentPod and also the same for TikTok and please give us a review

wherever you listen if you haven't already. We'll see you as always on Friday. Bye.