Extra Dirty with Hallie Batchelder - 28 things I learned by 28

Episode Date: October 9, 2025

It's bender season babes!! Hallie reflects on her own birthday... and how it's actually really embarrassing to celebrate it. Hallie talks about how recently she's been surrounding herself with people that cannot call it a night, and so she is going on benders until the sun comes up, but I guess this is 28!? Then Hallie gets into the 28 lessons she has learned by 28 (as written based off of plugging all of the episodes of Extra Dirty into ChatGPT). Enjoy the epi cookies, love you!! Muah! :kiss: Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

A vibrator will never ghost you. A vibrator will never ghost you, but sometimes batteries do turn on you. I will say that. There's nothing worse than when you are alone using your vibrator and just dies on you. That could be worse than heartbreak. That could be the biggest betrayal I have ever encountered. What are you little freaks? Okay, guys, I'm doing something really strange.

stupid right now. We have an emergency debrief situation. Hi, this is Hallie from the streets of New York. Guys, I had every intention of staying in last night. Welcome back to Extra Dirty. How was everyone doing on this beautiful Thursday? I'm doing just fine. Just me today, me, myself and I, and I thought we'd just sit down and have a cute little chat, just us. My birthday was, was. on Tuesday. It'll be of last week when this episode comes out. My birthday was last week. I'm not going to lie to you guys. I love attention. Look at me. I'm looking at three cameras right now in the room and obviously like I love attention. This is what I do for work. But I hate birthdays. There's something about birthdays that make me one spiral and to make me extremely uncomfortable. I want to

compare it to like walking down the aisle as like a bride. That also looks kind of embarrassing to me. there's something about a bitch like carrying on a birthday cake and all your friends sitting around staring at you with their phones out saying happy birthday in a restaurant and everyone's like turning their heads and like staring at you that makes me super like self-conscious almost also i feel like you either look at a birthday as oh my god like i feel like people get really sensitive on their birthdays regardless if you're looking at the glass half full or half empty i typically look at the glass half empty instead of being like, oh my God, I'm so thankful for life and I made it to 28 and look at all the people around me that love me. I tend to focus on the negative and like pinpoint and give

attention to the things I haven't accomplished or the things I don't have, which is super negative, but that's just like how it is for me. So I really downplay birthdays. It's kind of like New Year's Eve almost to where you feel like there's a lot of high expectations and you're like really sensitive and then usually those high expectations aren't met so going into this birthday i just had no expectations and just like wanted my core people around me for like a girl's dinner and i feel like if i have that then i don't need anything else i don't need presents blah blah blah although my parents were in town we did do a massive shopping hall which always like makes me feel a bit better too a little retail therapy and champagne and some r and our and our with your parents it really

warms the soul. I've been spiraling this whole month of September. As we know, it's been like a little bit of a sketchy September, and I'm not going to lie. I'm feeling October is going to be a cocktober. It's raining dick out there right now. And I was in a drought. I broke the threshold.

I'm flooding the gates. No pun intended. I'm just feeling a little sketchy October, too. I think we're going to be sketchy until December. and then I'll maybe try to chill for January, but I doubt it. I always say this. I've been telling all my friends because my two, like, best friends that are, like, my age are in serious relationships, one's engaged and one's in a serious relationship.

So I've been, like, hanging out with people that are, like, a little bit younger than me just to, like, I'm acting like a 22-year-old these days. I literally am acting. I told my friends, I'm like, I'm acting, like, post-grad. I don't know what's happening. Like, I want to go to, like, spring lounge. I want to go to, like, Soho Grand. I'm like, where's the after party?

I've been doing a lot of afters, a lot of like benders, Wednesday night shenanigans. I went to the box the other night. I went on a date with this guy, which was really fun. It ended really well for him. We went on a date and then I somehow ended up in Brooklyn at 2 a.m. And someone was like shooting a music video and I was there to witness some of that. And then we went to the box. And I was in a cardigan.

a cashmere blend cardigan at the box. I don't even know how I got in. But this is the second time within the span of two and a half weeks that I've been at the box on a Wednesday until the lights turn on, which is, if you know anything about the box, that's one extremely impressive. It takes a lot of, I don't know, I don't want to say sentences to like say up that late at the box, but it takes a lot of like bandwidth. That's the word I'm looking for.

so yeah it was one terrifying and two just like didn't need to happen and then i was up until like 8 a.m and then i slept till like 1 p.m and it was a whole thing but like i said i'm not really good at dates because i sleep with the guy on the first date i don't know if i'm really bad at dates or really good at dates for that reason but i mean you'd probably say it was yeah it was a great it was a good day i had fun but i've just like been so unsurious this month and i need to like figure my shit out. But then again, I'm like, I don't care. I just want to have fun and live my 20s. I don't want to look back and be like, I regretted not doing things and saying yes to things. I'm just like in my era of saying yes. And I feel like that's like a fun era to be in if you're safe.

I don't know if I'm being safe, but like I'm definitely having fun. But yeah, birthdays make me spiral. It sums up exactly what I was trying to say with that point of that whole story. So yeah, I've been spiraling a little bit, probably drinking a little too much. and probably being a little bit of a hoe. But it builds character and it builds lore. And I don't regret a fucking thing. What else happened in the span of the past few weeks? I obviously got my eye surgery.

I think I've beaten that point over the head. I've been talking about that way too much. But guys, like, no one understands how big of a deal getting my eyes fixed was for me. I've been wearing contacts for since I was six. Like, that's crazy. Like, did I even know? how to read by the age of six, probably. But probably not. I was always really bad at reading

because I associated reading with giving me headaches because my bifocals would always be at the tip of my nose. So I'd get migraines when I would read. So I hated reading, which means I hated reading out loud. So, like, I am a bad reader, like, in general, and I'm bad at reading things out loud. Even when I do, like, some of these ad reads, they're difficult for me because I can't really see. And I'm not, like, an advanced reader. And I don't like doing things. I'm not good at and I know everyone says practice makes perfect but like who has the time to fucking read also have ADHD so it just doesn't fit into like my body I don't like have the attention span to like read on the beach I don't know people do that and like sit still for that long like I can't

even sit still for like a massage let alone like collecting information I'm one of those readers that like would read like a whole paragraph and have to go back because I would just be like thinking about like what I was having for lunch or something like something random like that but maybe I'll pick up reading as a hobby or needlepoint or knitting I always loved knitting I used to knit in rehab because I couldn't do anything else so I became an avid knitter but I've ADHD so it only get through like halfway of all the scarves it made no sense but anyways that's been September for me I feel like I have no limits recently and I can do literally nothing in moderation and that's something I want to leave in 27 and bring it to 28 is learning how to find balance. I am a Libra,

so I should be good with balance, but I find it's either zero or 100. Either I'm inside rotting like a vampire watching reality TV, shutting out the outside world off, not replying to a single text. Or I'm bouncing off the walls of New York City like fucking Spider-Man, knocking on doors, banging on people's doors wondering where the after party is. And one thing about me is I hate calling it a night. So that's a horrible trait to have or like a really great trait to have when you're trying to have fun. But like I will be the last person standing. And I've found that recently that I've been surrounding myself with people that also have that quality about them, that they don't want to call it a night. So the sun will be rising and no one will be wanting to call it a night. And then we just

die the next day. I mean, it's not conducive with a productive day the next day. I'll be sleeping to one and then I'll do it all over again. You know what? This is me. This is me. This is me at 28. Fuck it. What reality TV am I watching right now? Reality TV, this is what it does for me. It's chaos and drama. That's not my own. So there's something that like is soothing about it. It like calms me down watching other bitches fight and i don't know if that's like a mental illness but it's just something about reality tv it's just such brain raw and so easy to consume and i can like have it on as white noise in the background while i'm like getting shit down in my apartment and going through emails etc and it won't be like a show like you have to like really pay attention to i'm a big

bravo fan i will say for the real house wide franchises i'm obsessed with i'm watching Miami right now just before this actually I was watching the Miami reunion I just think it's such juicy T it's like I can't fathom how this many girl groups have these many problems like part of me is like it has to be scripted like how are these bitches always fighting but it's extremely entertaining I'm watching Real Housewives of Miami I always watch reruns of Vanderpump rules I love they're saying about that show that just speaks to me below deck I love Love Island games I've been watching a lot but like I could never do Love Island There's something about the heart rate challenge that I could never do. I think I'm like too insecure for Love Island, to be honest with you.

Like, I don't know how people are all sitting on that little couch around the fire pit and they're wearing like barely nothing and they hop out and they're like giving everyone lap dances. Like I could never. It stresses me out. It kind of gives me like karaoke vibes and I fucking hate karaoke. But yeah, I'm watching those reality TV shows right now. I always watch whatever's like in season. Like I'll even watch Potomac.

like i'll watch all the random ones whatever's new but i will say with the real housewives since covid i feel like everything on the real housewives has become a lot more pc and maybe a little of that was needed but i feel like a lot of the franchises are missing delusion which is what made it so entertaining in the beginning which is why people love salt lake like that's what makes salt lake the best out of all the franchises right now is because those are some delusional ass bitches that probably say the wrong things sometimes but it's like not offensive or that deep I feel like everyone else is trying to be like too careful about their image which I get is fine but I feel like that's not the foundation of like what Real Housewives is built on in my opinion

one day maybe I could be on the Real Housewives I feel like I would like be so good on a show like that because I'm very confrontational. I'll like say it how it is and it will come off very abrasive so I feel like I would be good on a show like that and I would I would turn it up a notch and make it like a little more dramatic and just you know play into the entertainment value of it all but yeah that's what I'm watching right now okay for this next segment I thought I would like center it around my birthday a little bit because I am 28 so I'm like wise and old I'm an old wise hag here to just like preach my truths so So I thought I would like do something fun and plug in like all of my extra dirty content material into chat GPT and do like a little bit of a what 28 things I've learned by 28 and have it

read it back to me. And honestly when we did this, it was really funny. So I'm going to read some of my favorite things. Okay, number one. If his texting is spotty, move on. Yes. Well, you know what? I'm a bad text or two.

my texting spotty maybe that's why i'm singles because they've all like moved on they all knew that rule i'm kind of like the bar can't be that low i've been texting some spotty texters very like vague short just like they almost are like intentionally seeming like they want to be short and like they don't really care and like low lift i don't have fucking time for that you need to be obsessed with me and i can be a spotty texter but yeah if they're texting you very sporadically past 10 p.m. on weekends only. Cut them loose. Let the trash take itself out. Okay, number two. Bottle service is cheaper than therapy. Is it? I don't think it is. I don't know what kind of therapy Chatsy BT thinks I'm going to. A table in New York City is five grand. At least. At gospel,

it's five to seven. So I don't think, I don't know what kind of therapy, ChatsyBT thinks I'm going to. I don't even have a therapist. I would say brunch is cheaper than therapy. Bottomless mimoses is cheaper than therapy. And that is true. I agree with this. Bottle service no, though. A true bestie is the one holding your hair in the Uber, not judging the hookup. Fully, wholeheartedly agree. Although I hope the days of me throwing up in Uber's are way behind me. I used to do that in high school all the time. But like, who didn't? I was drinking fucking pink lemonade svedka and chugging it. Pink lemonade svedka in one hand, malibu rum in the other hand, to the face. And then I would like give a blowjob and like throw up on his dick. Yeah, those are the days I was throwing up in

Uber's. I don't do that anymore. That would be fucking insane and diabolical. Also, that's like an expensive mistake. Like hold it until you get somewhere like have him pull over. But yeah, I agree with this. Your best friend should not be judging any of your decisions. I think at this age of 28, your friends will have opinions and they can like share your opinions, but like you're a fucking adult. Like I'm a grown ass fucking woman. Most of the choices I make, I know I'm making the wrong ones and I'll be like, I'll deal with the consequences later. This decision I'm making, this guy I'm hooking up with, this guy I went back to hook up with. I know it's going to bite me in the ass in the long run. Yes, I probably know my friend's opinions, but like, if I want dick, like, no one's

going to stop me. Not even my best friends. Not even Thor. If I'm set on something or someone, it'll probably happen. And my friends will tell you that. But judging and, like, being critical over your besties choice in men, like, it only is a headache for you. They're going to do what they're gonna do and they'll learn their lesson the own way it's best that a person learns their lesson the own way and not from like you telling them that they're gonna fuck up and you have to be there when bestie comes back and said i know you were right like fuck i fucked up and you'll be like okay bestie let's go get brunch and hug it out okay next there's no hangover like mixing tequila gin and your ex's attention so valid so fair agree with this that is a fucking recipe for disaster i would also add to this

texting your ex first after like a drunk night drunk texting your ex, there's nothing worse and waking up and going through your phone and like, you know, the people you have texted and especially if you're texting like an ex-boyfriend or an ex-situationship, that just hits hard. Scaries are scaring at that point. I would have a Bloody Mary if this was a situation. That's the only thing that would get you through that. I don't drink gin. I don't drink tequila. I'm a big vodka girlie because I know how I'm going to react to vodka. I've also been drink a lot of bread wine lately, which probably is reflective in me being a fucking hornball because I'm humping everyone in the tri-state area at this point. I wouldn't mix tequila and gin

to save my life, please. Okay, next. Ghosting is rude, but sometimes deeply necessary. Fully agree. I think sometimes an explanation is not needed. I go back and forth with this ghosting dilemma because I've gotten ghosted, but I've also had guys write out paragraphs detailing why we're not going to work. I couldn't tell you which sucks for. I will say with a paragraph though, at least you can get closure and move on from that. I feel like with ghosting, it kind of just like drags it out a bit and there's a lot more what ifs in gray area in the in between when you're like getting over a situation. But like if you get ghosted, you get ghosted. I mean, everyone gets ghosted. Even Bella Hadid's probably gotten ghosted. Probably not. But like everyone

gets ghosted. It's part of growing up. It's part of like being in your 20s. It's part of of being a woman. It happens. Or a man. I've ghosted so many men. I've ghosted friendships. Sometimes ghosting just as necessary. I stand by this point. Okay next. You're not shy. You just don't like people. I agree with this. I think this is important to state. People suck. A lot of people suck. Something I've learned throughout the years is most people are weird and most men are gay. And you'll probably sleep with half the gay men. But yeah, they're gay. I only like a handful of people, to be honest.

I, like, have so many acquaintances. But most people are weird, and you never know someone's intentions these days. So you've got to keep your circle close. And I've said this before on the show. My dad always taught me there's only two or three people that you would call up on a Tuesday at 3 a.m. And say, my car broke down. Please don't ask me any questions.

and they would drop everything and come get you on the side of the highway without asking anything. There's only two or three people that would do that for you that are not family members. So that's kind of like how I attack my friendships is I look at those people

and I think would they do this for me? And if they don't check those boxes, then they can be friends but they're not like my close people. I don't know. People just like move weird. I don't know. That's just like something I've learned. Especially like in the social media world.

and the world I kind of have gotten myself into just like people move fucking weird men and women like you just never know anyone's intentions so and like don't trust anyone literally can't trust anyone there's been stuff about me on Reddit also as of recently that have been brought to my attention of things I've only told like people that I consider close friends and somehow there's a rat somehow it ends up on the fucking internet and I'm like how is this even possible? So like I'm just like a little bit more careful about what I share information to, especially about like people I'm like hooking up with or blah blah, blah. Like I'm very vague about it online, but I can't have my people telling the internet. The fuck. Anyways, if you have to Google,

is this a red flag? It's a red flag. Yeah, always. But like I love the color red. I look great. It brings out my eyes. I have been having this really weird relationship with chat GBT recently and I'll ask chat GBT everything, like literally about relationships. Like chat GBT has become one of my close personal friends. And I don't give a fuck about anyone going through my camera roll. I give a fuck about someone going through my chat GBT history. Let's talk about that. No one talks about that. Also, co-star, I've been highly dependent on co-star to just like dictate how my day is going to go. You plug in, like, you're a Libra, blah, blah, blah. Like, you're what time you were born, where you were born,

and, like, brings up, like, all those, like, in-depth, like, analysis about, like, your day, your year ahead, sex and love, your relationships, your lifestyle, like, how much money you're going to make, like, all those things. And, like, it's kind of accurate. It's kind of weird. But going back, is this a red flag? If you have to type that into any search engine or even ask your friends or even think about it, it's a red flag.

or also it would be a green flag. No one talks about green flags, though. It's always the red flags, but red flags enticed me. I'm like, I'm one of those bitches that's like, I can't fix him. I'm the exception when I'm never the exception. That's why I go after like narcissists because I like love a challenge. Because guys that are typically green flags and guys that are typically super nice, kind loving, I don't typically go for.

I don't see a challenge there. I like someone that can like butt heads with me, which is why I'm alone in single. because that's toxic and bad but it's fun and the sex is good goodbye next i'm going into my co-star right now this is what it says you're day at a glance you'll heal like fuck bitch no i won't do's friendship bracelets maybe that's because the taylor swift album came out at midnight do friendship bracelets playgrounds and postcards i don't see how i'm going to incorporate any of those things into my day today. Don't crowds.

That's kind of sketchy. Arctyotypes. I don't even know what that means. In blind trust. Blind trust, it speaks to me because there's a rat in my circle and need to find out who it is. I need it a P.I. in this bitch.

It says, the hurt that feels permanent isn't. Your mind wants to solve the damage before realizing it, but healing works backwards. Let your body catch up to what your brain already knows. I basically what I'm getting out of this is you are hungover let your body heal and then your brain will be fine that's what I'm getting from that but let's see what yesterday's was your emotions feel like a big roller coaster you hold up in your room stop responding to messages and fixate on your

shortcomings literally what was I just talking about and I didn't even read yesterday's that's kind of insane do what is needed for the situation you were in not the situation you wish you were in. Not the one that is fair, not the one that is more comfortable. You already know how to keep your feeling separate and that's a start. You desire to change this month depends on your ability. Remember that you don't need to manipulate even though you can. This is no small feat for a person who wants a complete merger, body, mind, and soul. This is your opportunity to practice love that defies societal expectations. The general theme of your life during this period is to teach others what you know about the hidden aspects of life and to be open to them teaching you.

Every day is an opportunity for a new investigation of life's fundamental questions. Isn't that crazy? I was just saying how I was out until 8 a.m., hooked up with this guy, slept to one, got back to my apartment. I was holed up in my apartment. My motions were like a roller coaster yesterday because I was coming down from my bender. I stopped responding to messages, including productions, which I apologize for, and I was fixating on my shortcomings, which I was just talking about, like, my birthday, and how I was only focused on

the things that I don't have and not the things that I do have. So yeah, that's co-star and it's usually right. Okay, next. DMs are where love stories and cautionary tales begin. I fully agree with this. I feel like in this day and age, it's so much more difficult to meet people organically, although that's how it should be that's how our parents did it like everyone's sliding into dms left and right i feel like i know a lot of people that are that are married now that that's how their love story began i don't think that's abnormal although it would be nice to like meet someone in real life and just have that spark and that like fairy tale like you have eye contact across the room which is half the reasons why i fixed my eyes because i wanted to get that eye contact across the room

and like be like oh my god we're falling in love love at first sight but i feel like you see less and less of that now and just a lot more of people online and and then setting up a date from there. But like, yeah, that's how love stories begin. That or fucking hinge or Raya or whatever your vice is. Grindr. Okay, next, you can be emotionally intelligent and unhinged. It's called balance. I would say I have a pretty high IQ and I'm self-aware of it.

But I also know that I'm like toxic and unhinged and a threat to say. society sometimes. But, you know, that's on self-awareness. I would say you can be both. I am both. I'm a Libra. So balance is what I'm drawn to. So if you can be a fucking crazy-ass bitch degenerate, but also have high intellect and be emotionally intelligent, I think you're a full, well-rounded, ass, down-ass bitch. Seems like a perfect girl to me. Okay, your 20s are for making mistakes. Just don't make them with the same man twice. Hallelujah. This is one of those things. It's so much easier said than done. I make so many mistakes with the same men more than twice. Like lots of times. It's like I am that bitch that puts the fork

into the light socket and see how many times it takes for literally my hair to fry off. Yeah, I guess I'm a sadist because I go back to these toxic men all the time. But I think it's like fun. And they're usually, those are like the best sexual endeavors typically. It my opinion. but yeah this is easier said than done i would say this would be something that'd be like a goal to strive to have but you know i feel like your 20s are just for like fucking up and like keep picking yourself back up and then falling down and like do it again and again and again and again and finally it'll be embedded in your brain that you need to stop that's kind of what makes your 20s fun it's the falling down part next no one actually knows what they're doing some people are just

louder about it fucking preach this is so real My mom always tells me, like, she's like, I would say no to millions of dollars to not go back into my 20s. Compared to her 30s, she said, night and day. No one knows what they're doing in their 20s. People think that they know what they're doing. But no one has their fucking shit figured out. And this is correct. People are just louder about it.

I feel like that's kind of like my whole journey online. It started with me just being like, I do not know what the fuck I'm doing. And I was loud about it and I talked about it online and I was very like transparent with my audience about that being like I do not work. I do not know what I love. I do not know what I want to do. That is perfectly normal. When I was in college, which by the way, waste of fucking tuition. I'm an influencer and podcaster now. But anyways, I was a classics major, art history minor. I had to pick a major. Like I had to pick one. I also didn't have an option not to go to college. My dad was like, you're going to college. Like it was never like, oh, maybe not. Like, you're going to fucking college and you're getting your degree, which is whatever, but I had to pick a major and I was kind of good at classics, picked it, but I was like, what am I going to work in a museum? I don't want to fucking do that shit. Luckily for me, when I graduated in 2019, COVID hit, and I was like, few, I get like a little bit more of like wiggle room of me to like figure out what I want to do. I did a lot of things I didn't want to do. I signed with a modeling agency. I wasn't a

fucking model. I had false eyelashes and I had lip filler that was pop. I looked like a blow up sex doll. And I was like, I'm not that tall. I'm like five seven, but I'm not like runway. It was just I was like throwing pasta at the fridge seeing what like would stick. There was a point where I was a brand wrap for Titos and I would go into liquor stores with a little like cart in like samples and get paid like 40 bucks an hour to give out samples at a fucking liquor store in Manhattan. Picture you walk into a liquor store on a Thursday afternoon to get like a bottle. You're about to go pregame with your friends and you see me dressed to the fucking nines behind a Tito's cart.

And I would have to take pictures with the customers that would take the samples. It was the most embarrassing. It was like a humiliation ritual. But the moral of the story is like I had no idea what I wanted to do. But I knew I had to do something like living in New York. like you have to fucking work. Luckily, I had that safety blanket that is my father to fall back on, but not everyone has that. And I was well aware of that. So I was grateful that I had that, but I still felt like I had no purpose. And feeling like you have no purpose or nothing like

you're good at or passionate about is a gutting feeling. And you feel pretty empty and just kind of like, it's a little depressing. You feel like kind of worthless. I figured it out and it took some time. I think that's also like an important lesson. Like give yourself some grace, some patience. And I think your 20s is about that as well. Just giving yourself some fucking patience and grace. Like give yourself a break. It's not that deep. It'll all get figured out. You were loved. And just trial and error. That pretty much sums up 20s, in my opinion. Trial and error. Next. A good outfit. Cures heartbreak faster. than journaling. I totally agree. Retail therapy is so important. A good outfit, you're feeling

confident and sexy and you're ready to take on other men. Best way to get over man is to get under another one. I've always said that. And maybe that's not something I should be teaching the youth. But I fully believe that. Get back out there and look hot doing it in a good fucking baller ass outfit. I fully agree with that. I don't think I even need to add to that. That's one is kind of self-explanatory. Stop trying to make a situation-ship or relationship. It's not build a boyfriend. I agree with this.

A situation-ship is only a situation-ship because it's something to someone and, like, not something to someone else. So you guys aren't aligned. And that's what makes it a situation. It's a situation for someone, not a situation for someone else. And then there's too much gray area. And, you know, the boundaries are not outlined. and it gets very confusing and I think that's what makes people like latch onto a situation ship so hard

is because there's a lack of validation from someone in the two parties either lack of validation or lack of communication like something's not getting filled and it's like almost putting like the wrong puzzle piece into like the wrong spot like you're trying to like make it work make it fit but it's not going to fit you can't build a boyfriend I agree with that you don't want to have to force a guy to want you or be with you because you are enough as is and there's going to be someone out there that treats you like that situationships are confusing and everyone says they always hurt more than actual like breakups and actual heartbreak and that's because the damn gray area the gray area will fuck you over it's very confusing

i've been in way too many situationships but they're kind of fun it's just like when do they end i feel like they all they always just kind of like fizzle out like there's no breakup so that that's where they like take longer to get over and you're just like always like guessing what things mean and i hate being in that position next if you only text after 10 p.m. you're an extracurricular not the main course this is true point period blank i mean it depends what you want i don't always think this is a bad thing because i'm not a big texter and sometimes all i want is a warm body on top of me so like I don't really want to talk during the day either like sometimes this works but if you like if it's a situation ship like we just talked about and you really like him but he's only talking to you

after 10 p.m. That means he only wants to fuck. He's horny because it's dark out or he's drunk and he's drunk and he's tipsy. But like my fucked up brain like when a guy's like drunk and he hits me up after TM I'm like but he's drunk and thinking about me like he's drunk and he texts in me. I'm like that must be his true feelings. Like, I'm so fucking delusional and sane, but I think all of our mothers would agree that this is a red flag. These guys are not worth our time, but getting booty called is just part of growing up. And sometimes I don't hate it. Sometimes I'm not always mad at being boot called. I wish more people were actually texting me after 10 p.m. I'm not going to lie. Because sometimes the phone can get pretty dry.

A vibrator will never ghost you. A vibrator will never ghost you, but sometimes batteries do turn on you. I will say that. I will say that. There's nothing worse than when you are alone using your vibrator and just dies on you. That could be worse than heartbreak. That could be the biggest betrayal I have ever encountered. Or if like a guy's using it on you and it dies, that's happened to me a few times.

but luckily I have like 19 of them so we just go in the drawer vibrators will never ghost you some people have stuffed animals we have vibrators that's how I look at it they are my comfort pieces but I just don't like prop

them on my bed like I would stuffed animals but I do travel with them like I would stuffed animals I had a stuffed animal growing up and I still have it in my home in Boston but I feel like if I had it in my apartment in New York like guys would be like what the fuck is wrong with this bitch it's still in my childhood bed and her name is kitty no her name is titty it was supposed to be

kitty but i couldn't say kitty and i called her titty so tit little tit big tit she has been with me she was a gift um to me when i was born so she's been stuffed and restuffed a lot of times just like me and um i'm grateful for her i miss her next leading with kindness is always the path best traveled so well said you guys know how we feel about kindness it's very important to me it takes nothing to be kind it takes literally nothing to be kind i don't understand how like i encountered this fucking cunt the other day um when i was at alexander wing she was the only person in line outside the store and i've never seen alexander wing with a line but there was there must have been too many people in there and this bitch was just standing outside it was a

Saturday in Soho and she was just sitting outside with like a guy she was with and it didn't really there were so many people on the street it didn't really look like she was waiting in line but she was outside the door so I tried to go inside thinking that maybe they were just like hanging out there and she goes excuse me there's a line clearly and she was so rude and I was like oh bitch I'm not trying to fucking cut your janky ass you're probably not even going to spend money you fucking weird freak and then I got kind of nasty but like don't be fucking rude Don't be fucking rude. Sorry, I got really heated about that.

I'm really passionate about kindness because if you're not kind, what do you have? You're a fucking miserable lucer if you're not kind. It takes nothing to be kind. Nothing. Mineral energy. Smile at a fucking stranger. It could make their day. That's how I lead my life.

But I am that way. Also, like if you fucking cross me, I will, you know, pull all your fucking teeth out. But, you know, I'm a Libra. I like balance. But only if you cross me. Okay, next. good sex won't fix a bad man but it will delay your exit so well said we need to get that on a t-shirt uh i agree sex has been something that you know i'm a very touchy person like the physical aspect

of relationship or situationhip is the most important aspect to me i don't even care like about gift giving all that bullshit like fuck me period that's all i care about so if the sex is good but you're kind of a fucking dickhead. I will be staying around a little bit longer. I think it can go in reverse too. Like if the sex is bad with a good man, it will speed up my exit. I will be out the fucking door.

That happened to me recently. This sweetheart man, we hooked up, and I hooked up with him a couple times. I gave him a couple tries. And I just felt like I was hooking up with a 17-year-old. I wasn't. He was my age. But, like, if that makes any sense,

It was so predictable. We were in my bed. And then we were like spooning. And then he like tries to like flip me over to like make out with me. And then the kissing was like kind of eh. And then I'm like, okay, then he's going to try to finger me next. It was like I could predict each step, each position. There was nothing spontaneous about it.

It was very gentle. It was very like, oh, sorry. Oh, it was like bumpy. And I was like, not in the good way. he's very bumpy and awkward it was like there was no sexual chemistry and I let him hit twice or a couple times three times maybe I don't know but I was just like this is not it it made me say bye goodbye good riddance next pillow talk is dangerous that's where delusion is born another true statement when you're in bed with a guy and you guys just did like the most intimate act you could possibly think

of and then you're just lying down and then he starts talking about his family and his childhood trauma and I start mentioning my karate days and how I've been to rehab multiple multiple times for eating and then just like you start yapping about deeper things heavier things and then I'm like wait are we in love like that's where delusion is born because I'm like wait we just connect it spiritually that's why i save a pillow talk to like a very like i don't really indulge unless we're like talking shit like pillow talk is like meant to be like i just like gossip if we have mutual friends like or like we're in the same friend group i'm like oh my god did you like Becky do you see what you wore the other day and like that kind of stuff but like i'm not like getting deep with any of my

suitors that's where it gets sticky and dangerous ladies don't get deep with your suitors Okay, next. If you didn't finish, it was a nap with a guest star. I like this one because I've talked about this before. I don't really count a body unless I finish. Then it's just basically like a nap with like a warm body thrusting around you. Like does it really count if you didn't finish? I think it probably technically does, but finishing is important. And if he's not making you finish, leave. Decline. We're not, I don't, no patience for that. Not this age. I have no tolerance for that. So yeah, if you didn't finish, it's kind of just like a fun nap with weird visuals and smells and tastes. Okay next. But stuff is a trust fall. True. But it's like a

fun trust fall and then it's game over. Then you're having a time. But yeah, I would say in all, in all A is a trust fall. That's a good way to look at it. Because you really also have to trust the person that you're falling onto that could go wrong in so many ways i mean knock on what it's never gone wrong for me but i've heard horror stories it is a trust fall it's kind of like a game of chance but i've always come out strong come out lucky so friends with benefits only works if the benefit is good yes we've talked about this when it comes to like sex there has to be some sort of trade-off or else it's what's the benefit they have to be benefiting you have to be benefiting maybe he's buying you bags and um you're sucking his dick there has to be an equal trade-off and someone you both

have to be benefiting for it to work but if you're like sucking a dick for burkins that might be looked down upon by society and i've never sucked dick for a burkin i don't really like burkins i've talked about that before i hate burkins i think they're kind of ugly and overpriced but friends of benefit only works if like you're finishing or you're getting gifts period not every text needs a reply i definitely understand why chat gbt would bring this up because i fucking hate texting i hate it it's tedious and i agree not every text needs to reply i only reply to text if one i'm planning something whether that's dinner dick and like work And sometimes I don't even reply to that.

Production will tell you, sometimes it's hard to get track of me sometimes. I'm on loose sometimes. I'm outside. I just like my phone's always on do not disturb. I had a meeting with my team about this last week. They were like, we need to focus on not doing the do not disturb because like if we call you, you need to pick up because some things do. I'm just kind of like I procrastinate a lot.

and I have ADHD so sometimes I'll think I'll reply to a text in my head and I'll like not have replied. I'm still replying to birthday text and it's been like over a week so and I feel like that's super rude if you don't reply to a birthday text but I just like got so many not to like subtly flex there but there's just so many fucking birthday texts and each are like kind of meaningful and you can't just copy and paste or reply and you kind of have to like cater to that person's text it's a lot of work. It's like writing a fucking paper. But I will say like if I send you a funny TikTok and you don't reply, death to them all. I find that so offensive. Okay. Spending time alone is a flex, not a failure. Fully agree. I am a very social person. I go out all the time, but I spend my

days recharging that battery, retarding that social battery. If I do not have alone time, I get over-stimulated, and I'm not the best, most funnyest version of myself. Also, I think about valuing this time right now of being alone, because one day I'm going to have fucking rug rats, kids running around, and then I'm going to be praying for the days I was alone. That's kind of how I look at it. So, yeah, I'm like very thankful for my alone time. It's very important to me living alone. I've lived alone for a few years now, and it's been the biggest blessing and just I need it

for my own fucking sanity. And then I think the next time I'll have a roommate, it's probably when I get one of these guys to put a fucking ring on it. The best ideas happen, tipsy at happy hour. The best and the worst. I'm a very

impulsive person. So I'm drunk and I have like a spur of the moment idea and I think it's like the best idea ever. The liquor's flowing. The mimosis are bottomless. Yes, in the moment I think all these things are really fun and creative, but then you wake up the next day and you're like, why the fuck did I do that?

I feel like some of my best trips with my girlfriends have been planned out of tipsy brunches or tipsy happy hours. I feel like that's just like girlhood. Energy is expensive, budget accordingly. Fully agree. Pick and choose the things that you want to throw your energy into. Because if you spread yourself too thin, you will get diluted and you won't be giving 110% to the things you actually care about and prioritize. I've been learning this. I think this has taken me a lot, a long time to learn because I am someone that says yes to pretty much everything.

I think no is a very weird word. And I love saying yes. Yes is a fun word. But I do find with saying yes a lot to everything and just like putting your energy into a lot of different things, it kind of washes you out, like quick burnout. And then you can't like be the best version of yourself for the things in your life that actually matters. to you. I, like, for an example, you know, in this industry, there's so many brand events,

like lots of events, lots of things that you can say yes or no do. And I say yes to everything. And I think to a fall almost because now I'm just like spread too thin. And you don't want to be hoaring yourself out to everyone, especially in this industry. Like you should be selective and intentional. And that's something I want to be more of this next year is be extremely more intentional and only doing things that align to like my personal brand and who I am and who I care about like there's some brand deals that I've done that I'm like holy fucking rents do it just gives off rents dues vibes and I know that I'm very aware of that but rents fucking do and sometimes I got to whore myself out for the fucking check you would do because these checks

aren't light and I got to say yes keep the lights on okay this year this next year I want to say no to more things and be more intentional and put my energy into things I give a fuck about like sitting here and doing this podcast that should be my number one priority I should not have scheduling conflicts with other many things that I don't give a fuck about next friendships evolve let people go with grace or block both are valid yeah both are valid you know sometimes like I what is it rule like if you're friends with a person for more than seven years they'll be a friend for life I think that's the rule I only have a couple friends like that like my roommate margot or Lauren but it's okay to move like people

are just like go on their own past I'm not friends with any of my high school like I see them sometimes but like best friends I think it's okay to like go your own path and go your own way it's totally normal it's like very normal and sometimes friends need to be cut off over time people will show you their true colors and when that happens let them go and don't look back next invest in quality bedding your sleep will thank you this is so important like if you have a jankety ass bed with crappy ass bedding like how is your mental health okay. Like I put money into my fucking bedding because I spend a lot of time in my bed and it's good for sleep and you need sleep to recover. You need good quality linens on your skin. Your skin's your

biggest organ. So like take care of your body. It's like a health thing. You spend most of your time in your bed. Well like at least six hours for me a bit more because I'm a lazy piece of fucking shit. But I agree. Invest in some quality fucking betting. All right. Last one. Your 20s are for reinventing yourself as many times it's necessary. I feel like this is a good one to end this segment on. I wholeheartedly believe that. I feel like since age of 20, now I'm 28, I've been a different version of myself every year. I like look back at photos and like look back at things I cared about during each age. And I'm like, wow, it just changes so drastically every year. I feel like every year. I feel like every year I'm trying to be like a better, more refined version of myself the year prior, but it just like keeps changing, getting new interests and hobbies and new interests in people.

And just like, you know, it's like you want to change every year. You don't want to be the same person you were at age 20. And I hope by age 30, I'm an even better version of myself. I still feel like I have a lot of room for growth. I actually know that. I have a lot of room for growth. And I look forward to, you know, discovering myself. and reinventing myself a few more times before I hit that age.

Okay, that was a really fun segment. I feel like that was almost like therapeutic in a lot of ways. But anyways, next week, next week's episode will be in Vegas, which will be really, really fucking fun. Guys, me in Vegas is actually a diabolical human being. It's just a version of myself that like rarely gets tapped into, but when I tap into it, I'm like balls to the fucking wall. and I will be recording out there.

Hopefully we'll have some like special guests on. The whole team's going to be there. I think it's like one of the biggest events on while it's done to date. Like the lineup is seriously fucking impressive. It's going to be really fun. Great. I'll be there. Liv, Lauren and like some friends I know that are going.

So I'm going to try to get everyone as many people as possible sitting down the couch answering your guys' questions, talking about sketchy September, just being raunchy and fun and very like Vegas like. I'm sure we're going to pull some. great stories out of that weekend. I'm really looking forward to being a fucking crazy ass bitch there. But for now, as always, I love you guys. I love doing these solo episodes sitting down and just yapping my face off. You know where to watch me YouTube and you can listen to me on every other platform. Please share this podcast with all your friends. Give it five stars. Leave a nice

comment. And as always, I love you guys. And I'll see you next week. Bye!