Extra Dirty with Hallie Batchelder - Bestie catch-up: FOMO might just kill me

Episode Date: December 4, 2025

We are in NEED of some bestie time!! Hallie and Lauren sit down to catch up on everything, from Hallie's late night shenanigans with the friend group that doesn't know how to say NO, to Hallie's plots to join Lauren and Jordan's honeymoon... We finally get to hear about Lauren's Unwell Vegas recap full of naked women at the 12pm casino lunch, hear their thoughts on being monogomish, and Hallie puts Lauren to the test with a pop culture quiz!!! Enjoy my pookies! And PSA to men: If you ask Hallie to talk not about you online, she won't! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

I don't know about you, but I'm, like, productive in the dark, so I like when it gets dark early. Like, productive in the dark. Yeah. Well, so am I, but like... Two different ways. Yeah, not with my laptop. What are you, guys, I'm doing something really stupid right now. We have an emergency debrief situation.

Hi, this is Hallie from the streets of New York. Guys, I had every intention of staying in love. Lauren Fishman. Lauren Fishbine, welcome to Extra Dirty. Am I starting my episodes like that now? I don't know. Are we? Does it feel very professional?

I just, like, wanted to sit down and have, like, a catch-up because I feel like I haven't seen you in a few days, and I'm really becoming unhinged. I want her to be interviewed. You want to be interviewed? Yeah, are we on the wrong podcast? this is not an interview podcast I'll start over no way

that was funny funny I love how you're wearing a winter jacket right now yeah it's fucking cold in here I like how the first note on this outline is thoughts on Canada that's really sending me I don't really understand the question

I'm just going to riffraff with you for a little bit actually like how have you been we can see each other in like a few days just working just working I was out until 5 am. last night I know I saw that and I was was expecting to sit down and hear all about it because I just like you know when I draw my babysitters with me aka you and live yeah I just become a different animal we should

actually talk about that because we were together on Saturday I went to bed and all of a sudden I'm seeing you like sliding down the stairs in remi's video and I'm like I was just with her yeah it's literally like when you leave it's like you know when you're younger and you're like okay your parents go out for dinner you can like have the pregame yeah it's like you're You're going out to dinner and now I can like let loose. Let loose. Oh, well, that kind of makes it sound really bad. But I'm 28, but I'm 20.

But there's nothing new in my life, really, to be honest, it's been pretty bleak. It's getting dark out at 3. You're wearing a puffer coat on my podcast right now. It's cold. It's miserable. And I want to execute myself. It is Rick Owens. It's Rick Owens?

Is that why you're wearing it? No. Is it really that cold in here? Yeah, feel my hands. You wanted to wear Ricky Rick. Feel my hands. Ricky, blicky. My favorite thing Lauren does is like, she'll do a outfit video on TikTok. And then someone will be like, oh my God, where did you get your jacket? She'll be like,

St. Laurent, heart, heart, exclamation. Remember when I used to link coats? Yeah, that were like $2,000. No, like $4,000. And they weren't even commissionable links. They were just links. They were just links. Yeah, this was before you had a shop by. And you would just link it to the site. And I'm like, like, it's actually, like, sometimes it works. I link to Chloe jacket and I made like 300 bucks off of it because one person. I mean, how much commissioned is Chloe giving? Well, it's not to Chloe, but it's like to Sacks or something. And they give you like 15%.

It's not bad, actually. It's very significant. If I had a. Yeah, I mean, I don't know. But yeah, I had a long night last night and I'm scared of the person I was. Yeah. So I saw your stories. Yeah.

Can you tell me what you did? Like, where did your night start? And then how did it end at your? your apartment. I've been like on the go. I don't even know what date is. And I'm, I'm anticipating a crash out soon, honestly. We started the night. Well, I had a business dinner. Oh, because I'm standing on business. What was your business dinner? It was at the 86. And it was like with a friend, you know, Patrick. And it kind of looked like we were on a date, but we weren't. But we were just like talking about entrepreneurship, honestly. It was a very productive meeting, so I felt like the need to

celebrate after. So then he dropped me off at my apartment. And the night could have ended there. It was 9.30. But then I started seeing, no, not for me. It was Thursday. And then I started seeing people posting. Where were they? At like some bar on Spring Street.

Do you love a bar on Spring Street? I do love a bar on Spring Street. I do like a bar on Spring Street, actually. And like all my friends were there. Like all the usual suspects. Yeah. So I went. And the thing with that group of people love them to death,

No one knows how to call it a night And no one knows the meaning of casual Okay So nothing was casual about any of that night It's tough when you put all those people together Because then you guys stay up until like six in the morning Like there's no leader It's the blind leading the blind

And we have no limits and boundaries So just at a bar getting hammered And then you went to your apartment for an after Yeah, it's literally survival of the fittest But after it's addition I like It's literally for the first person who like starts to fall asleep that's when we call it a night which was like who and it was me so i think they went to a second

afters what at what time these people don't fuck around well i think a late night is 6 i am that's a late night for me how do they sometimes they have full 48 hour benders that is i like put me like put me down that would kill you that would kill me that would kill you would die i would die for the hospital i would die i would send myself to a hospital like i can't even like tell you because I've never experienced that because for me a late night is like 3 a.m. And then I'm recovering for about two weeks. Yeah. So sometimes they'll like we'll stay up all night out and afters and then get breakfast and then they'll go to a lunch and then they'll go back to someone's apartment and then they'll go out. They'd be like studied like what happened

to me as a child that like I can't do that. Maybe you had like sports or something like you would structure like maybe i didn't i didn't have i wasn't sports you were a goalie i was a goalie but like i didn't like really i just had to kind of stand there and take balls honestly though like if i remember back to college hally like i would actually my freshman year like i would have lift and practice at six a m i would stay out until three remember i would set alarms to go see my ex yeah i would I would literally go out. That's called a dick appointment. I would go out.

I would go to sleep for 30 minutes, set an alarm, make sure to text him because now he's coming home from the bar, go to see him, hang out, drink more with the seniors, and then go to bed at like 4 a.m. And then I had lift and practice at 6. So like, I was doing it. I just don't know where. I mean, you got to fit it in the D somewhere. It's only good for you.

It's healthy for you. I don't know where it went off. I haven't gotten late in like over a month or two, despite what the internet thinks. PSA, I'm not fucking everyone that I see. That's true. She's actually not. I can attest because usually she's looking around for me or one of our other friends making sure she's not missing anything.

Yeah, I get friend FOMO. And we've talked about this. Like this happened in Mekonos. I could have gotten late in Mekonos. But I wanted to hang out with my friends. My friends being you, Lauren, Alex. You have literally never left me for, like, I've never left a friend for a man. I can honestly.

that time in Miami when I ubered to okay that was one time and you were was worth that yeah that was one time other than that one time you have never left me out I never left you out finish that sentence we've never left me out no like you've never left me like out alone at night for a guy like you've always ended the night with me I don't think that says much about me I think most men don't want to see me until the wee hours of the morning and you're already in bed. And I'm already in bed. Yeah. I feel like you get with guys more when like on like a random Tuesday when I'm like at home like cooking and you'll and then you won't tell me about it until like weeks later and you're like yeah I got with this guy. I'm like when. No like I don't tell you when

I hook up with people. That's funny. That not all people know. I'm very like secretive. Yeah. And I see you every every Friday and Saturday, which is like when I go out primarily. But fine. When I was going out like every single day of the week, you also ever left me for a guy. No, I would never. If I'm having sex with the guy, I don't want to be thinking about what my best friends are up to while I'm riding this man into the sunset. Because you would have so much trauma. I would get distracted and I wouldn't be able to finish. It's true. You can't have that.

Okay, so what are your thoughts on Canada? Like, beautiful? Honestly. Have you ever been to Canada? Yes. I thought everyone spoke French there. Wee. I mean, in Quebec, right?

Is Quebec, not Canada? No, it is. But it's a part of Canada. This is where we get clipped being like... These girls are idiots. American education system's failing us. No, Quebec is like a French territory. And so they speak French there.

But I think the rest of Canada doesn't. And I really want to go there that really pretty blue lake area. We could do your honeymoon there. No. Can I come on your honeymoon? I actually was thinking about this. And I do want to invite friends on my honeymoon. Just like me and Jordan have the best time.

Like, okay. All right. Here's the plan. Get married. Don't go on a honeymoon. I was thinking to go on a honeymoon in like the wintertime and go to like Switzerland, something really cool, me and Jordan for a few days. And then all of our friends come. How much fun? This is just getting more expensive and expensive. The plans are developing and developing. No, you don't have to come. I'm going to come. I will come. If you want to come. I will come. Yeah. And like Samaritz and we'll like go ski and I have a blast. Yeah. And then, like, me and Jordan can always leave early, but what is it?

Come on. So much better when I do. Do you want to go skiing in the Swiss Alps at some point? See, there you go. You can do it for my honeymoon. Perfect. Perfect. I love celebrating other people's loves.

Yeah. Me and Jordan will go. Maybe I'll have a boyfriend right then. That would be fantastic. You can bring him. Like, me and Jordan go first alone for, like, a few days, and then you guys meet us. Yeah. And just join our, whatever house we get.

Or hotel. Okay. We can go on a double date. When's our next double date? We need to find a new contender. Have we been on? Oh, we did go on a double date the other weekend. That was really odd.

It wasn't a double date. I know. I was hoping like no one was like looking around thinking we were on a double date. No, we weren't on a double date. That was like a business meeting for Jordan. Like he wanted to like, you know, prospect and it wasn't a double date. But you were sending me. It was a double date.

It wasn't. And it was falling asleep. You were falling asleep. Hallie was falling. I kept looking at her and I was like, you don't have to do this to yourself. You can go home. She was like a baby fighting it.

I was like, I had been awake for 48 hours or something crazy like that. And I kept telling you. I was like, it's okay. I'm not going to be offended. No one hears me offended if you go home. She's like, no. Like, why? She goes, because what if I miss something?

You're not missing anything. I might be that one case of phoma where it might kill me. It actually might. Yeah. Because you will push yourself. I fight my body. You fight your body. Yeah, for real.

You need to, like, pitch that to like Vogue, the influencer that died of FOMO. BOMO. Hallie Bachelorder. Dyes of FOMO. Asteemed Hoare and Influencer podcaster. Dyes of FOMO at the age of 28. Will left to no one because she is whore. Oh, Lauren.

Also, that guy that I had a crush on. Yeah. Apparently, like, he's scared I'm going to talk about him online. Isn't that pussy shit? I think it's weird. And I feel like we've been with a few, I think. That's happened to me a handful of times. I think it's happening too.

I kind of expect it to do. Yes, but I think it's okay for them to speak that to you. They don't have to say it to their friends and be like, oh, I don't want to take her on a date because I'm afraid you're just going to talk about me online. Just take you on a date and just be like, hey, I'd like to keep this private and you will. As we're talking about it online right now. Yeah, but we're not saying names. No, I even knows who we're speaking about. No, I know.

It's more, it's more, this is more of a general statement. To all men, this is a PSA. This is a PSA to all men in Halley's future. If you ask her directly, do not talk about me online. She won't. Because there's a lot of people that have asked me not to talk about them online. And you haven't. Period.

Full stop. And no one knows. It's probably on Reddit. It's in our text. Any engagement updates? You picked out your wedding dress? I picked out my wedding dress. It's beautiful.

So gorgeous. This is so funny. We're at Viroang. Yeah. So I'm trying on all these dresses. And I try on like this one dress and I come out. And I'm like, okay. Do you love it? Hallie's like, I love it. But I want to see the one that you really like. And everyone was like, this is the dress, Allie. Well, I wasn't at the first fitting. I know. I know. So we were like, we were like, let's you. My mom was like, let's put on the one that you like. And I think you were probably just like, well, you were probably tired because you went to sleep at 6 a.m. Yeah. You did. And Hallie's like, no, but I, I, I really love this one but I want to see the one that you really love and I was like this is it this is it what do you think I'm really bad in settings like that like I don't even know what to look for if that makes sense like in fashion like bridal fashion bridal fashion because I feel like with my own fashion I have like my own sense of style it's different from yours I feel like I'm gonna I see

you and Vivian Westwood for your wedding for sure it's fine a fucking man first please okay sorry but yes i don't like get geeked up about wedding stuff i don't think i don't think i'm going to be like a like really excited about my own wedding because i don't go to yours but i don't think i am either no not that i'm not excited for my wedding i don't get like geek like i haven't i wasn't i don't use the word i don't use the word geeked up like i am geeked i wasn't a kid that was like taking it printing out pictures and all this stuff like jumping off your bed with the pillowcase on your head woo buying none No, I definitely wasn't doing that, but I'm excited for the fashion.

Like, I've been having so much fun picking out all my outfits and, like, I'm going to design something. Like, I think it's going to be so much fun. Like, I'm having so much fun. Yeah. With the clothes, because I love clothes. I know. I love clothes.

Your makeup's going to be pretty in your hair. So, well, yours will get you a pretty dress. Wait, we haven't really even sat down. You didn't come on my Vegas podcast because you're busy, like. Eating? Eating? I was eating. Oh, cute.

Our Vegas experience was very different. Like Lauren, like spot. And I was like, but to be fair. Making out with boys. Vegas for three nights is very difficult for East Coasters because dinner started at 10. That's 1 a.m. for us. That is, I'm asleep. Well, dinner at 10 p.m. is like late anyways.

Yeah, but we had like shows and we had things to do. So then like at the after stuff, I was dying. I was so tired. And so you and Great. would go out and then the next day we were you guys were recording and I was eating yeah like I was eating at a full blown restaurant that had fucking fire they were like throwing fire like you don't understand the restaurant that we ate at like I was like okay like let's just go for a nice lunch we show up at this lunch there's naked women like just dancing it was a full blown show

it was pitch black and it was 12 p.m. Vegas is scary oh I made so I made money I played black I played blackjack i don't even know where you were yeah i left with like i was up like a thousand bucks i had a weird my nights were weird we're very different i was really on hinge i i thought i ate and i made money and then you left and then i left what are your thoughts on new york city in the winter um you like to like make soup yeah i was going to say i actually that's how loren that's exactly what loren was going to say i don't even have to fucking say anything she's just me like I like soup I like soup I like chili I always invite you over for my soups I've you come over for my soup so you haven't made a soup in a long time I haven't but it's about time

but I've been like really depressed like I'm not gonna lie like I know in the winter I because I this time of year this time of year is always really tough for me I drink too much I get really like nostalgic the holidays bring up a lot of weird emotions for me for some reason I get like really like I feel like reflective I feel like disappointed in my like inner child yeah if that makes any sense so like when it's so beautiful out and like everything's lit up I'm like the world doesn't look like this anymore to me as an adult like everything's gray it is dark but that's how I feel like holidays do that for some people I know so back to the winter thing like I don't know about you but I'm like productive in the dark so I like when it gets dark early like

productive in the dark yeah well so am i but too different and different ways with my laptop with my laptop like decks i'm like yes it's pitch black outside but i so i'd like it i like it but you have a really okay there is like a point of time and when i know that you're going to go dark on me from like thanksgiving to new year you get very in your head and you reflect on your year and you reflect on your year as I should yeah that you're like this is my reflecting time and I always take it so personally but I won't this year because I know it's just like it's what happens I actually just saw a quote that was like after a certain point in November like I don't want to absorb any like I'm done learning things and I'm done listening to things like my brain is shut off it's shut off until

the new year it's like it's like Sunday like November reach the cap on anything this head can handle so I have nothing else to give yeah besides just aimlessly partying and being like email about it and being email about it yeah because then in the new year you pop back up and you're like okay here all my new goals it just feels like I hate when things I hate shifting of seasons I hate fucking daylight savings yeah any little change it affects me because I have no control over it and like I have like little OCD things and I get like kind of like frazzled by it especially from summer to fall I get really email well yeah also like I think everyone there's no routine because everyone is I'll never have routine you'll never have routine

I'll never ever have routine maybe like when you're a mom this IOD has a lot more time on it so that won't be happening for a while but but maybe when I'm a mom I don't think I'll be doing after is when I'm a mother I hope not I can't even imagine actually I I will say, though, like, we go out with, like, people that are mothers and fathers. They should not be out, though. They are fucking out until 8 in the morning. And I'm, like, at that Halloween party, we just went to. Like, they were all, they're all parents.

They were out until 6 a.m. I mean, like, what the fuck are you guys doing? Maybe I was like, they're one time to let loose. They let loose a lot. But there's some, I will say there's some fathers, I know, that, like, I'm like, I have a kid. Like, go home. What are you doing? Like, they're out too much.

It's so strange. Yeah. Anyways, what do you think about? Monogamy. These segues are fucking sending me. Monogamy is great. Yeah. I love my partner.

What do you think about monogamish? What's that? It's really kind of monogamy-ish. No. It was a Cosmo article. Shout out Willa. Let me look it up. What did the cause?

I didn't read it. So tell me what it said. I mean, what does it really mean to be monogamish? And then it's literally me and you at the function. It's us partying. Like, it's literally us partying. That's them being monogamish. Tell me.

First coined by legendary sex columnist Dan Savage. He sounds like a legendary sex columnist. I'm not going to lie. Monogamous refers to a relationship style wherein mostly monogamous couples choose to have an extra relational sexual experiences. Often sparingly and with strict boundaries that only allow for non-monogamous activity, under very specific circumstances. This question seems targeted.

I didn't think it was targeted before I read this. For now that you're reading the article. Now that I'm reading it, I feel like Marshall like is teeing you up for something. Yeah, Marshall. Marshall. I will talk about this. I want to talk about monogamous, though. We don't have to talk about our rendezvous.

But I will say, I don't know. Do you think you could be an monogamous? How about that? I. Yes, I think you can. Because I was just watching Salt Lake. The real housewife is Salt Lake City. And one of the girls, Bronwyn, love her.

She was saying that, like, she's having, like, these trust issues with her husband. Like, he was, like, texting another girl or something and, like, was caught, like, texting someone or looking at pictures of a girl on a plane. And, like, it was reported to, like, a blog or something. Yeah. And she's, like, the thing is, like, if he wanted to explore something out of her marriage and we just had conversations about it and set boundaries and we're very specific, like, I would be open to that. Right. It's the hiding. It's the hiding.

It's the hiding. yeah I think I would agree with that like I think that it's a trust issue I think it's a trust issue like without trust you don't have anything right but if like you trusted your man full heartedly like with my permission like yeah you could do whatever you want right in front of me right if I gave you the go yeah if I gave you the go no I think that like I think the question is like can you I can be monogamous you can be monogamous I've seen you in relationships one like you have in your situation when i like a guy i'm all in when you like a very um i don't know if don't fucking touch my man yeah i don't think that you could ever like like no and if a guy ever told you that he has

those thoughts you would beat his fucking ass you would tear him apart i would tear him oh it gets me like works up even thinking about it but also we haven't been with anyone for like 20 plus years so like i don't i don't know you know yeah that's also good point i don't know what that's like it could be fun to like spice things up like maybe like yeah i don't know i would maybe do three sums like if the girl was completely random yeah i don't know i think you guys maybe with two guys like that would be funny you know that like me where it's like the girl's like that's you guys i'm dead who would be the guy would it be like a friend or would it be a random well i've done it with twins okay well but like it wasn't like a eye full tower situation it was just like

That was, do you remember that? I remember that. That was the craziest story. Those twins, like, need help. No, they were so cute. They're so strange. What twins are we talking about? Because there's been a few twins.

There's been two sets of twins. They love you. They love me. I do think it's weird to like that I was doing that with twins that were related. I was like, you guys are brothers. Yeah, like they're weird. Like I would never do that with my brin. No.

Imagine I had sex with my sister. And another guy? No, that's weird. Oh my God, remember we were sitting at, sorry. But we were sitting at the bar the other weekend and someone was like, okay, picture this. You wake up. I can't even say this. Say it.

I can't. They're like, picture this. You wake up. And you're mom. Oh, yeah. You can't even say that. You're right. I can't even say it.

No, but like when I was talking up with the twins, we were like on a couch under a blanket watching a movie. Like they were next to me on either side. And both of their hands started in my headline, they're like, this is about to be really interesting because they didn't know what they were doing. And then their hands met and they were like and then their hands met like right on my, they're like both like all my thighs. And I was like, I was like they're about to like meet up the same spot. This basement of yours has seen so much. So much. So much. Okay. Next question. Hit me. Or next topic. Okay, I want to do a segment with you called

Obvious Pop Culture Trivia. Okay. Because you don't know anything about pop culture. It's like I could be like, who is Bill Clinton? And she'd be like, okay, no, I know that one. WWE wrestler. Okay. What was Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's coupling?

Bradgelina. Brangelina. Bradgelina. Bradgelina. Brantelina. Which niece of Alec Baldwin is also married to a famous. It's north of the border pop star. Oh, Haley Beaver.

Yeah. Okay. Which 2009 movie is the highest grossing box office film of all time. 2009? Do you know? What do you have known without looking at that? Superman? I could have guessed.

Superman? Wait, 2009. How old were we? I'm not a fucking mathematician. Avatar. Are you kidding? I would have never. Who knows that?

That was the biggest movie of all time. I would have guessed Avatar or like Hunger Games or something like that. Okay. which singer is famously known as the queen of pop gaga no taylor swift no mylie no who madonna oh which actor turned royalty is married to prince harry i know this one uh what's her name hold on she was in suits uh fuck what's her name maggie markel there you go my crushing this who played jack and rose in the titanic i just watched this with you okay jack was uh What's the name?

With the fucking cat. Hold on. I'm just bad at names. With the fucking hat. I'm just bad at names. Okay. She was... Fuck.

I do not know. I'm really bad with their names. Leo. Leo is the guy. Leonardo DiCaprio. The girl would be harder for me too. The girl was Blanchette. Kate Blanchette.

Kate Winslet. I was close. I think it was a Kate. Which actor is known for playing. Iron Man in the Marvel movies Hugh Jackman Robert Downey Jr. Fuck! Don't they look the same?

I don't know. Are they single? Which TV show features the characters, Ross, Rachel, Monica and Chandler. These are like almost insulting. Yeah, come on. Which singer's real name is Stephanie, Joanne, Angelina, and Gerbonata. Gaga.

Honestly, shocked you got that. The only reason I know that is because... Who is the man in Kim Kardashian sex? tape. Ray J? Yeah. Oh, wow. I'm surprising myself.

What was the 2025 Mechala theme? Honestly, I have no fucking idea. Wait, Carl Lagerfeld. Excuse me? No. What was it? It was black dandyism in tailoring black style. What does six, seven mean?

Six, seven. six seven six seven like how like how big a guy's how big what say it say it louder

like how big a guy is it has no meaning so why do you say it I don't know it's not my it's not our age demo okay I think it's the equivalent to like six foot seven foot eight foot it's like this

you know I used to dab yeah but like there was meaning behind it what was the meaning behind the dab please explain to me well the dab wasn't like a word it was like an emote yeah like so is six seven well so if i just did this someone would know that means six seven so i'm gonna walk into the office where i think who performed to the twenty twenty five super bowl half time show kentra kamar complete the tic-tok famous sound nothing beats a i have no idea nothing beats a jet two holiday oh oh yeah yeah well you should have if you said it

with like six seven six seven six seven Okay, six, seven. Next time we're in a serious fight. I'd be like, honestly, fucking six, seven, fuck you. Six, seven. Name two of the Twilight franchise books. Twilight Eclipse. I wouldn't know.

Twilight. I don't read. I, wait, remember. I like missed the days when I was like a kid and Twilight was coming out and it was came out at like 12 a.m. And you would go to the movie theater and everyone from your high school was there. And then you would get to school and be like, oh my god did you hear so-and-so-so made out the new twilight movie and i was there like my mom

did you ever get fingered at the movie theaters i was like really ugly um no one wanted anything to do with me i would get fingered at the movie theaters of course i was that bitch and like a north face zip up in these ugs and i was getting finger blasted at the fucking movie theater what was that like tell me about that i used to give like hand chops honestly a lot of what i did was like illegal at the fucking local movie theater i think it's like probably public indecency or public lewd acts like who wasn't doing that no one wanted that for me at the time i used to give my high school boyfriend like road dome every day oh my god i swear i still have a cane to my neck you are you're one of a kind we had this thing in high school yeah called road rally this is actually the craziest thing

And I just, I can't believe that we did this. And it's, it's really scary. But every single year, juniors and seniors, you have road rally. So we would have these like 10 groups. There was like three friend groups in high school. We would split girls up between like 10 groups. It was like four girls. They would have a driver, one guy.

And it would be like a, it would be like a list of things that they have to do. so like do the bases on the bases and you have to document everything and then afterwards we would all meet up at like someone's house and everything would be on like a camera drive and we would upload it and then like whoever did the most things that team won road rally yeah can you believe that we did this we're like how old were we 16 17 I can't believe like we're on the drive at that age yeah and they're they're still doing it like I'm I know the high school is still doing it. It's insane.

That's absurd. And like this is in little old Livingston, New Jersey. Like, what? Yeah, that would get me in some trouble. That would definitely get you in some trouble. Oh, that was a fun segment. I like that. I'm really,

now we're going to go on harder. Yeah. All right, we're leveling up for this next segment. Wait, what is the segment? It's like, what do you want for Christmas? A few questions, no, a few Q&As. Okay. how to ride it without legs cramping and straining do your legs cramp and strain i mean drink some water

first all that's not normal go to the gym how to ride dick without your legs cramping up remember when we taught who is riding dick where their legs are cramping up i don't do that froggy bullshit that takes i might not that's what i was saying go to the gym for that yeah i don't have the legs for that and whenever guy wants that i'm like trust me you don't want that you're like you're like no I'm like literally the, my pelvic floor will collapse if we do this. Like my bones will hurt you. Yeah. Like you're going to be able to like feel my ribs.

Yeah. No, that one is, that one I can do just for like a little bit. And then when the legs do cramp up, you go back down. I don't like doing the froggy bullshit. I also feel like it doesn't feel good for you. Actually, it doesn't feel good for me. That's why I don't like doing it. Really forget it.

It's also a workout. Like I wake up my legs are sore. Go to the guy. I really wants to do that. I'll do that. But it's better on my knees. But they hate that. That's what I mean.

Like, guys, like, don't like that position. Really? Yeah. Why are you looking me like that? Gosh, it's like, maybe. Like, I'm a few to work on it. I might like it. Like, I can't with you.

Sorry. Okay. I still even think that is just like, they just like the idea of someone twerking on their dick. Like, I don't think it honestly feels better than them and doggy. I feel like guys love doggy. Guys love doggy. That's what I'm saying.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, like, I don't know if it, like, feels better because you're twerking on their dick or if it's the thought of, like, a hot girl literally riding and twerking on their dick. Yeah, it's nice. But it's just, like, mix it up for them. Well, I love being on top. Mix it up. I need to be on top.

I would do that the whole time if it was up to me. Usually I just go on top and then I finish and then I'll let them do whatever. I'm like, yeah, you can throw me around and do whatever you want now. I don't care if my mind has left the chat. I'm just a physical beating heart now. It's like, it's so interesting. I'm like, wrap it up. Can I say something just like about like growing up and like watching TV and like seeing like everyone finish at the same time?

That's not real. No one finished, but it's miraculous when it happened. It's finished at the same time. Yes, but that's not real. Finishing at the same time is crazy. It's insane. It's actually now it makes me angry when I watch a movie and they're like everyone's like like finish at the same time. Okay, so that's fake.

Yeah. I mean, sex on TV is just not real. porn's even like not real though the porn I watch is my favorite that was my favorite like bit that we ever did what when we were with me you and live on the podcast and we were talking about like the porn that you watch it's crazy it's crazy it's so funny it makes so much sense for you it just like reflects my personality through and through whenever people are like oh I just watch girl and girl like most girls do that I feel like and I never understood it I'm like I want to see He's like, no.

I need to see a guy. Yeah. Like, I don't even think I'm watching the girl. I think I'm watching the guy. That's so funny. I don't even want to look at the girl. What is that saying? Wait, Hallie.

You're watching like gay porn. Everyone's getting off. All the guys. Forget the girl in the porn for Hall. I've never watched. I've never watched gay porn, but I wouldn't be opposed to it. Have you watched porn while you have sex? That's like, I used to love to do with what to space.

No, I haven't, but I should try it. It's like a one big orgy. Yeah. I used to do that with my, like, one Miami guy. But, like, my apartment is, like, right next to the elevator. So, like, when you get out of the elevator and the TV is on in my apartment, you can hear it. Imagine I have, like, porn on surround sound.

Someone's, like, getting out of the elevator on my floor. No, that's what happened when I was in Nantucket. I was hooking up with the guy in the room. And, like, he had put the porn on surround. Who was it? He was at your nant-tok? Oh, in his nantucked house. Yeah.

I thought it was- And he put it on the whole house. Oh, my God. So all his guy friends were just like, they knew what we were doing in the room, but they just like kept it on. So funny. They like all got horny and went to their perspective rooms. That was a wild time.

They got it wasn't no nut November. It was definitely, it was a lot of nutting July. Okay. Have you ever been Eiffel Tower? No. No. Have you? No, but I think I would.

I just have never been like, it's just also so degrading. And like, I kind of like love a degrading situation like in certain respects, but like getting high full towered is like a new level. What happened to you? Being degraded. I don't know. I had a great childhood, went to an all-girls Catholic school. I think it was the Catholic school.

Yeah, really fucks you up. Mm-hmm. And just. I think it was. I also just like I'm curious. Yeah. I like want to, like, try everything. I've done everything.

I want to try everything at least once because I'm curious what it's like or like how do you know what you like and if you don't like if you're not trying everything maybe that's the next one maybe Christmas I'll get you that for Christmas go to Paris um go to Paris have you ever had a phase in your life where you didn't want to have sex yes Lauren schedule sex yes no you know what it is if I'm stressed at work which I am like the last thing I want to do And I know that it's probably I should be doing it because I feel like it'll probably make me feel better. But the last thing I want to do is have sex. Like after being stressed at work and like I'm on calls all day and I'm stressed, I don't want to have sex. I feel like I'd be the opposite. I know. I know you think that. But a lot of the people that I work with, we like talk about this all the time and we're like, is it bad at home?

And I'm like, yeah, I'm really tired and I'm really stressed. And I'm really like, it's like he's like almost like I come home and like, I'm like, I want to kill you. Shut up. Don't talk to me. Did you live in a studio? So, like, there's no way to escape him almost. Right.

And so it's actually better when we do plan and, like, we'll go out to a nice dinner. Like, you have a date night. Exactly. That's what's better for me because if we just come home and like, I don't want to cook, but I will, right? And then I'm like, okay, I had a bad day. I cooked. You're home really late. We only have an hour before you have to go to bed because he gets in so late.

Yeah. Like the last thing. So that's why. it's like better for me like okay like let's have a dinner he'll leave work a little bit early so it's like you know like I feel like I can like disassociate from my stress okay so to answer your question is yes I mean I just go through phases of my life where I don't have sex yes like I went six months to see it without having sex yeah that was crazy but like you also weren't interested in it at all no I wasn't like I don't know I went through I think April to September not

sex yeah but then but then you went hard in September then I went fucking yeah you do that you're like all in you're like all or nothing there's no middle yeah what is it um moderation there's no six seven there's no this six seven yeah most embarrassing sex story mine was like when my acts oh my own the hiccups mine was when my ex was fucking me from behind in college and when he finished he just like farted for like it felt like a minute straight that's not like it was embarrassing for you that's embarrassing for him no i know i wouldn't i never embarrassed myself one of you embarrassed one of you embarrassed yourself in bed i was embarrassing for him but like i've never embarrassed myself

I was probably really embarrassing was like I think I remember like one okay in the moment I didn't think it was embarrassing but then I remember in college I got with this one guy and when I left he was like yeah my roommate said you really laughed like that's embarrassing and then afterwards after that I was never loud again I was like you just like you're a loser like you just like you just made me feel bad you just made me feel bad about myself I feel like the louder the better I'm like theatrical it's like it's like my Broadway show no I was never allowed with him again and he didn't have a good time anymore and I was like okay bye you're done I feel like being loud is like a validation almost to them so even if it's just like feel great I'm like right that was embarrassing hearing that after the fact yeah and I was like you just hurt my feelings but embarrassing like that guy that's embarrassing and he should see someone about that Because he couldn't, like, stop farting because he was how to finish finishing. I don't know.

That's really bad. And I was just like, that's really bad. Oh, my God. He just kept farting. I was just like. Oh. Oh, my. Oh, my God.

That's really bad. I'm like, you go see a fucking doctor about that. This reminds me of something that happened the other night. Jordan had a full on fucking coughing attack the other night in the middle of the night. It was like 2 a.m. He will not stop coughing. like for 20 minutes and I was like it obviously woke me up and it's starting to piss me the fuck off and I look at him and he has his face mask on and he has his mouth tape on and he's just coughing

and I was like Jordan drink water but he had mouth tape on maybe like he didn't know what does what does he think that does for him it helps him like not like in the middle of the night it helps him keep his mouth closed and it helps him with his breathing he was like sinus issues I don't know, it helps him. It really does, because otherwise he would literally be sleeping there with, like, his full mouth open. Sorry, Jordan. We're just picking on him today.

We're picking on him. But full on coughing attack. And I'm like, and all I said was drink some water. He drank some water and he was fine. And he went back just like, were you not, like, did your brain not go to maybe drink some water after 20 minutes? Maybe he had a cold. It was actually insane.

I relate to him because I, I don't like water either. It was crazy. Was that like an embarrassing sex story? No. It was just a thought. And then my second thought about the fart story, and I'm intrigued to see if like Sonny, so one time, so Jordan like will always be like, he forever will be like you're

a fart sniffer because this one time, Sunny, tell me if you think this is funny and totally feel free to cut this if you don't. But this one time, me and Jordan were at my leghouse and we were leaving. I don't even know if I, you know, the story. Yeah, you've told me a few times. Oh. But you can tell the class. Okay.

It's one time we were at my lekehouse. And we were leaving. I'm like, okay, Jordan, take the trash out. When he takes the trash out and I'm walking past him and I saw this horrible sentence, I'm like, okay, what the fuck did I cook this weekend that's in the garbage that's rotting? So I like lean down because he has the garbage in his hand. And I like lean down to the garbage. And I'm like, and he starts.

dying laughing. And I'm like, what? He's like, you totally just did my part. And I was like, oh my God, I thought it was the trash. And I was trying to figure out what that scent was. And he was like, so your initial reaction is to smell the trash? And I was like, I just wanted to know like what it was. Like, what if it was like something in the kitchen that was rotting or it was like,

I needed to like know where the scent was coming from. I just can't. It's just boys are so disgusting to me. Like, like control your fucking. bowel movements. Yeah, he loves that story. Boys are nasty. Boys are really gross.

He loves that story, though. Most embarrassing sex story turns to fart stories. But okay, what are we doing tonight? We're going to have CV tonight. I want to meet a man. I think you will there. The guy that invited us were actually props to Jordan. He got these plans for us.

I know. He's been better. He's been better. He's crushing it. He's starting to reach Daddy Jr. Sadd. Yeah. And I'm accepting it.

Jordan is reaching Daddy Jr. He's Daddy Jr. I love that. I can't wait until we don't have to split the bill with him. I know. Well, he did that for us the other weekend. I know because he wasn't, I don't think that guy had any intention of making us pay. So he probably was going to look like an idiot if he was like.

All right, ladies. All right, ladies, cough it up. Put your cards in. Yeah, put your cards on the people. He invited us to like this yacht thing in the Arbazel. I'm only there for like 36 hours. I know. I know. But he invited us this SVB thing tonight.

he's he's six seven he's he's six seven he's six seven he's six seven he's growing he's doing better um and we're gonna look home sitting right now yeah those shoes are actually insane i love them they look like the morny like those red mahony boots yeah they look like you're i don't know those are cracking me up but like those are so you so sick but anyways we have to go get ready for a beautiful night out. What are you going to wear? I'm going to wear, I don't know. Dress me. Okay. Oh, so cute. Maybe I'll wear some tights. I was going to wear tight. We mean, we'll be going to wear some tights. All right. Anyways, Lauren, I love you. Thank you for coming on my show. As always, we have such good girl talk on this conversation. Really had so many lefts and rights and upside downs.

And boobs and weaves. But I feel like everyone loves me. Come on. Actually, someone literally commented on my Instagram four hours ago and said we need low on the pod immediately I love that four hours ago so should I reply back the people I'm here I give what the people ask for all the time here but anyways I love you so much and as always guys you can watch me on YouTube tell your friends about me all good thing comment nice things be a kind human being five stars like subscribe I don't know all the buttons that are positive comment like things and clip nice things you can look listen to me on any other platform. And as always, I love you and I'll see you next Thursday

and be safe and be good this weekend. All of you. I'm looking at every camera. Bye. Bye.