Fairy Tale Fix - 118: High Quality Nasty Horse Stories

Episode Date: February 10, 2026

Happy Lunar New Year! Abbie celebrates the onset of the Year of the Horse (her people!) with telling the tale of how the Chinese Zodiac came to be in the first place, followed up with a timeless horse trope here on Fairy Tale Fix with The Girl With The Horse’s Head (another excellent Chinese fairy tale). Kelsey follows up with another great FTF staple involving rich people being in hell: The Fiddler in Hell.

we did receive a correction. Oh, yeah. Yes, we did. On my pronunciation of a word from our episode in December, where I talked about Quetloshishi, which I'm told was a decent pronunciation, but our Mexican language correspondent, Leangela, reached out to us a couple weeks ago

and told me that I, I said nahadl instead of no what. When I was talking about the language that Quetloshoshi comes from. And actually, you know what? I'm going to Google it real quick because I didn't before I started this because I forgot that we got our correction. And she even included a pronunciation guide in her text message to us. Yeah. But now I am.

You know, that's what I get for not looking it up. by the way, this is fairy tale fix. Oh my God, it's fairy tale fix. You said you're splicing this back in the front. I've totally just remembered we forgot to introduce the show. I'm Kelsey. I'm Abby. And yeah, this is the show where we read classic fairy tales.

And then we fix them for a modern audience. and we do our best to pronounce things correctly. And then are happy to take correction when we don't. Thank you very much, Leangela. Thank you, Leandro, much. Letting us know. So I actually walked past a guy with a katana the other day, just out in the wild. How?

Why? Where? I don't know. But I was walking. And this guy had, it was in a sheath. So I don't actually know if there was like a sword specifically in it, but it was like that curved shape. And it was like, he is a katana. And it kind of freaked me out because he was also mumbling to himself.

And he literally said, if I can't have them, then no one can. What? And I kept watching him just like very, very carefully like, please don't take that out and stab me. Please don't stab me. And then he did not stab me. That's good. Okay, I'm glad. I see you look like you're in one piece.

so that's that's good although I don't know getting stowed by a sword by a stranger I mean if I didn't die would be a pretty great story too it would be a great story and even if you did die what a way to go at least that's not boring but you know what's weirder is I saw him again the next morning as I was driving to get breakfast before work and I only knew it was him because it was the same katana on the same side like he's wearing the same clothes like also still talking I couldn't obviously I was in my car I couldn't hear what he was saying but it's probably more stuff that makes you go I know I help he and everyone in his life are okay me too but I thought that was kind of weird I was like oh that guy's got a sword

you don't see it every day for anyone wondering Abby was just telling me about how she's got a katana in her game that she's playing That was the connective tissue. Yeah, I've been replaying cyberpunk 2077.

And I'm doing a completely different play style to the kind of character I normally play in any game because usually I have no patience for stealth anything. Oh, really? Stealth is so fun, though. I traditionally hate it. So I just go, I'm a smash and grab game player.

I get that. But I am trying new things and I have discovered and like this cyberpunk in particular like incentivizes you to play in a more stealthy way because you get cash bonuses and I'm poor. And I need cybernetic upgrades and cool cars and nice apartments. So I've been trying to play stealthy. And Kelsey, did you know that if you actually. invest in the stealth skills, stealth missions become easier.

They do. That kind of makes me think we should play more together because I love stealth. Then we should play things that require stealthing. Like I could be the stealth person in the group and you could be the smash and grab. That actually sounds really fun too. Like it goes well together, you know, and you have like different talents. You don't want two stealth people in a, and I. group. No. Yeah. You, exactly. You need one person who's good, who's good at sneaking and you need one

person who's really big and tough and can take a beating and just runs in and grabs things. You distract while I stealth, grab something. You be the scalpel. I'll be the giant hammer. Ooh, I love it. Yeah, no. That's so fun. I love, I love it. You're trying new things. that's very true because we played peak yesterday. Just kind of, that was the first time we've ever played a game together. Just what's the word where you didn't plan it? Randomly.

Just randomly. Just Adam and I were on. Spontaneously. Yeah. It was so fun. It was so fun. Because I looked, because I was editing our episode. I was editing 117 and I looked over at Stephen's screen.

And I was like, and here I am just fucking off. I think I played peak like three or four times yesterday. Hell yeah, you did. As you deserve. I got so many banges, everyone. Oh, I peaked solo, which I don't know if anybody plays peak, but that's really hard. And I did it on my first try. It was so exciting.

I'm so proud of you. No, because I looked over at Steven and I was like, oh, my God, like, y'all are playing Peak? Do you think you'll play again after? And like, and I can play? Mm-hmm. And he told me it depends on if we get the, like, Adam and Kelsey are trying to do the under one hour challenge. So if we, if we don't make it, then we're going to do it again.

And you're a little slow poke. We can always work on that one later. It's fun. No, he was determined to get that one for you. It was very exciting that we did. And I'm glad Stephen was there because he beat the owl. level and we like we ended up just jumping off the cliff when he got to the top so he could beat it for us it's kind of like when you're bit when you're I imagine I don't have a big brother but

I imagine watching your big brother play video games and you're like I need you to do this hard part for me I did I kind of had a I had like a foster brother when I was a kid that would do that for yeah wow I kind of forgot he existed for a second I like that was also uh I was like oh yeah my cousin uh he was my cousin he like lived with us for a little while anyway yeah he was great at video games it was the best I loved I love watching like people who are great at video games play video games absolutely it's so fun because it's like wow you're just everything's so smooth and easy for you and then when I try it all goes wrong But you're incredible to watch playing Peak, though.

I do want to brag that when we were doing the speed run, I beat both Stephen and Adam on the first two levels. Hell yeah, you did. And I believe it. You're so good at like pathfinding and like getting up to get supplies. And then also you're so good at coming and rescuing your friends when they fall in a hole. It's so much fun. Everyone. go check out Peak.

It's a great game. It's like $8 too. I literally was like every time I tried to go to sleep last night, I was climbing the kiln, which is the last level. Like I would close my eyes and I would see the kiln and I was just climbing. I don't think I've made it to the top yet. Like the kiln is a really hard level. You haven't yet?

You will. I will. It is hard. It took me a long time to get there too. It's very scary. It's one of those games where you're climbing and so your hands get really sweaty because it's stressful. Stressful. I killed Kelsey yesterday. By accident. Was it by accident? It was by accident. Are you talking about when you ate me or something else? Oh, I killed Kelsey twice yesterday.

One of them was on purpose. There's like a... There's a badge you get for star, basically you're like starving and then your peak friends who are climbing the mountain with you start to look like roasted chickens and you can actually eat them. You get a resourcefulness badge. It's very funny. And then you ate me. Yes. But no, I'm talking about when I was a ghost.

and I was trying to help you climb somewhere. Oh, yeah. And you were like, yeah, there's a ledge just up. Yeah, there's totally a ledge right here. And there was not a ledge right there. That's funny. Sometimes it looks like there's a ledge and there's not. I mean, it just happens.

It happens, but it was still, I still felt really bad. Don't. It's so fun. It's such a, like, silly, cute, funny game. Mm-hmm. That's way, it's way more fun with friends. So. It's a great game

Trying to get all the like silly badges I love it I love it so much What's the next one you want? I don't know We ended up Adam and I ended up going back on And we got the like

Eat the coconut Winterberry honeycomb Oh nice okay We went back on and we ended up getting that Because I just wanted to play again Because I'm obsessed And it's fun to like go on And have like a goal

besides just beating it, you know? Mm-hmm. And that one, apparently you have to eat all those things, and then you do have to beat the level. So you can't just eat them and you get the badge. You have to beat it after. Gotcha. You have to survive the level.

Yeah, so I was very scared. It was terrifying. I was really stressed out. But yeah, I don't know what the next badge is. I'd have to go look. I'm sure there are so many that I don't have still. There's one for beating it without getting any fall damage. Which Adam is working on right now.

I don't know if he's going to get. It's so hard. That's a really hard one. So it's hard down to fall. It's such a fun game. I'm glad you. I'm glad we played together. It's so much fun.

I love playing games with you. Me too. I really like playing games with you too. I want to try out more games. I really want to play. that mouse one. Oh, the like fairy tale mouse one. Hell yes. I don't know when it comes out, but I think I have it like on my wish list. Me too. Yay. We'll totally do it when it does. Um, besides games, I thought this was really interesting. Um, I had my annual checkup at my doctor. I already told

you this, but I thought this was really interesting. Oh, yeah. I'm such, I'm such a hydrated queen. My doctor was looking at. My doctor was looking at. My doctor was. looking at my blood work and she was like, I think you might be drinking too much water, which I didn't realize was a thing. I guess you can drink too much water and it shows up in your blood work. I knew what was a thing insofar as like didn't, wasn't there like a frat house that like got. Yes, but that was like she, or he drank so much water all at once. Like all at once, exactly. Tudged like gallons of water as like a hazing thing. So I know you can't do that because you like literally drown yourselves. I just didn't realize that you could sort of like

casually in your day to day life be drinking too much water. She was like, do you drink a lot of water? And I'm like, yeah, yeah, I do. Like I usually carry like my, my big ass water cup around with a straw. So it's really easy to like sip on. And she's like, yeah, I think you might be drinking too much. So I think that's really funny. That is really funny. You're hydrated queen. Health update. Other than that, everything looked good, but... That's good. Maybe too much water. I don't know.

No wonder your skin always looks great. Thank you. So hydrated. So weird. What happens? Like, why, like, what's... I don't know, how is it too much? Why is it too much?

What's... You know, like, I should have looked into that before. She didn't really get into it because she went over, like, all of my blood work. She just wanted to kind of go over, like, everything. and she was talking really fast. So I didn't really catch like why there was just something in my blood that was like a little extra high. And she's like, she said it wasn't like a problem, but just that like, oh, you might be like drinking a little too much water. Okay, I googled it.

And according to the Mayo, according to the Mayo Clinic. Tell me, Dr. Abby. Yes. Well, it's the doctor's at the Mayo Clinic. So they should know. Athletes, okay. well, not just athletes, but when you drink too much water, your kidneys can't get rid of the excess water. And so the sodium content of your blood becomes diluted.

So just throws the balance of your body's internal mechanisms off. That makes sense. If you drink too much water. Yeah. Okay, cool. Good to know. Neat. Yeah, neat.

I guess I'll try to sip a little bit of this. I'm always thirsty, so it's going to be hard for me. Stop it. Just stop it. Just stop it. I have literally three drinks right now. I have long tea in front of me and I have I have wine and I have water down here.

It's perfect. It's the perfect beverage goblin trifecta. One to energize, one to hydrate and one just for fun. That's exactly what it is. What I do. have any beverages because you are also typically a beverage goblin as well. I am typically a beverage goblin. I am doing a damp January.

So I, and also you telling me that you had been drinking too much water has made me start rethinking my own water intake so I don't have a water with me. But I've been trying out these like non-alcoholic beverages that like, have they claim that they have like adaptogen and neutropics and stuff in them that are supposed to like make you feel relaxed. Yeah, I've seen that advertised a lot. Yeah, so I'm trying a couple of those out. How is it? This one in particular likes to brand itself is giving you a floaty feeling.

But I looked it up on Reddit and I'm like, does it really? Is that a real thing or is that? Is that a real thing? Well, so apparently adaptogens are a real thing in the sense that they are like sort of natural mood balancers. But I don't know sort of medicinally how much you need to imbibe for that to actually be a thing. And I don't know if that quantity is reflected in the drink. But I googled the specific brand on Reddit. I'm not going to name the brand because pay me.

Is it? Beep. Yeah. I've tried them too. It was very tasty. It's good. I like it. It tastes nice.

And kind of expensive though. For like a... Kind of expensive. Yeah. For something with no alcohol in it. Yeah. Like an expensive soda. The advice from Reddit was

you have to drink two of them, but apparently you do. get the floaty feeling that they advertise. So let's see what happened. This is my first one. And I'll probably get another one during this episode. And I'll report at the end to see if I achieved flotation.

Excellent. Excellent. I've had that. And I remember it tasting really good. It was like a blackberry mint flavor or something like that. Blackberry lemon. Anyway. I think it's blackberry.

gray lemon is there a flavor. It was delicious. I definitely didn't drink two though. Reddit says you got to drink two in order to achieve the effect. I believe the Reddit. It is funny to me though that it's like I am still attempting to do drugs. You know what, Abby? With everything that's going on in the world right now, we all just want to feel anything

but dread. So I don't blame you. I don't know how you're doing. I don't know how anyone does dry January, damp January. I'm doing why January. Cry January. Cry January. Like absolutely. I'm very, I'm very, I'm very proud of myself for my discipline. Yeah. But I'm also trying out other things that might make me feel relaxed and happy. Yeah. Well, let me know how. knows. I'll let you, I will report back on whether or not I am experiencing adaptogenic sensations by the end of this episode. Excellent. Excellent. Speaking of Reddit, and we did that one Reddit bonus episode for our Patreon and patrons. See how I made the connection

there? I love it. Excellent. Well done. You're the Segway queen in addition to being a hydrated queen. Thank you. We want to take a moment to thank our Patreon producers, which we haven't done in a while. So yeah, I'm just going to list them out. Thank you so much. Angel, Jasell, our very overlords. And then our job-creating dragons who are Sin, William, Elizabeth, Dami, Caroline, Melissa, Rabia, Tamara, Linda, Dana, and Kate. we love you all so much. Thank you. Thank you so much. You are just, I mean, you are our job creating dragons. We appreciate you so much. We couldn't do the show without you.

Could not. And we'll be sending you a little thank you something soon. So make sure, I'm pretty sure everybody that I listed out has their address updated. We've probably cut that out. But make sure your address is updated. Yeah. If you don't. Check.

I can't send you anything. Yeah. We want to get you something nice. Yes. And thank you. We also got a new patron in the past couple of weeks that I don't think we've had a chance to thank him on the main feed yet. Or them. Yeah.

We haven't got a chance to thank them on the main feed yet. So we just want to say, thank you, Lucas, for joining us on our Patreon. on we really appreciate you. Welcome aboard. Thank you. Hope you're enjoying those bonus episodes. Woohoo. Woohoo.

All right. Let's, let's freaking do this. I'm really excited to tell you my story and I think I have to wait until you tell me a couple stories. I think you do too. I think it's, um...

I think that's a good sign though. When I'm so excited to tell you, I'm like, I have to wait for Abby to tell me her story first. I feel the exact same way about mine. So we're going to go ahead and we're going to get that started. So I've got two. They're both pretty short. And I chose these today because we are recording this sort of mid-January.

And I think the episode will probably drop sometime around the Lunar New Year. And so I'm going to tell us the story of the Chinese zodiac. Hell, yes. It's called the Chinese zodiac. It's just the legend of the Chinese zodiac. Alternative titles are race to the finish. I wish I hadn't told you that. I don't think that helps me.

I'm so bad of predictions. It's fine. Yeah. Well. Because the only prediction I can think based on that is there's a race. And I think that's too obvious. It's a little too obvious So I'm not going to give that one to you

Yeah But yeah This is this is the The legend The legend surrounding the Chinese zodiac So you may give me Go ahead and give me three Okay

My first prediction Gosh is it too on the nose To say all the Zodiac characters Are in a competition Of some kind Is that too on the house? I didn't say race. Yes, you can guess that.

Okay. ZODX are in competition. Okay. I also want to predict... I'm so bad at these. I have no idea. And it's also all I can think about too is the 12th that came by mail because it's also like a, you know, multiple characters. Yeah.

And it's also like related to time and tracking it. Right. I predict the snake is the best one because that's when I am a snake. Oh, I was going to ask. Yeah, I'm Year of the Horse. So Year of the Horse has come around again, 26 is Year of the Horse. Yeah, it has. And I hear that's really good news because the year of the snake is usually like a really transitional year. And it's like you're shedding your skin and there's a lot of change. And then the horse comes in triumphantly. Oh, God. I hope that's true. We definitely did not just spend one hour before recording this talking about how scary the world is. So. Yep. No tears were shed. And we were both totally fine.

We're both doing great. We're doing so good. Talked about all the great news in our lives. Yeah. Personally and universally. Personally, professionally, politically, it's all going... Spiritually. Spiritually.

It's all going just... Just beaches. Okay. Zodiacs are in competition. But I don't want to cry again. Let's keep going. Snake is the best one. You know what else I want to predict? Friendship.

That's what I love. Friendship is magic. I want like friendship motif. Yes, please. Okay. I've already read it, so I'm not making predictions. Okay. So this is the story of the Chinese zodiac.

I got this translation from stokemuseums.org. Oh, hold on. The Lunar New Year comes, is on February 17th. Just in case anybody was wondering the actual date. Oh, okay. I thought it was earlier than that this year. Oh, Google might be wrong. I keep forgetting to.

New Year. Do you have to double check? I keep forgetting Google doesn't. Google tells me lies now, but it does say Tuesday, February 17th. That looks like it's right because Chinesenewyear.net says that it's February 17th. Okay. Sounds like they would know. You're the horse, baby?

Let's hope it's better than the year of the snake, because that one was not great. That was not good. Not a good snake here. I just mean the character is going to be the best, not the year is the best. That's what I imagine. A funny, clever, hot snake.

Is snake and dragon the same thing? Like, is it interchangeable? No, they're different. There's a dragon ear too? Okay. Yep. Okay. Okay.

So this is the story of the Chinese zodiac. The Jade Emperor, ruler of heaven and earth, decided it would be easier for his people to measure time if he gave them a proper calendar called a zodiac. He decided to name each year after one of 12 animals. But how could he decide which animals deserve to have years named after them? Oh, that's such a good question. I know. We already know the answer, but he picked excellent choices, in my opinion. He made great choices.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. He decided to ask all the animals to take part in a race. He would name the years after the first 12 animals to arrive at his palace on the riverbank. Oh, my God, I love this so much. Me, too. I love it so much. It's amazing.

Another reason I let, like, I love, so I don't know, for all of my, uh, anime and manga, related fans out there. There's a very, very fun manga called Fruits Basket that is about exactly what happens here. Incredible. Except like it's humans personify the animals and a lot of like really fucked up shit happens because it's a manga.

Very good. It's a ride. Anyway, shout out Fruits Basket. In those days, the cat and the rat were best friends. What an honor it would be to be part of the Jade Emperor's calendar squeaked the rat. Oh, wow. Then I should totally do a different voice.

I didn't realize it said squeaked. What an honor it would be to be part of the Jade Emperor's calendar squeaked the rat. We'll enter the race together. But when they saw where the race was to take place, they were horrified. They had to cross a great wide river very deep and very fast flowing and neither of them could swim. However, they were both cunning and clever. Yeah, they were. Yeah, they were.

We could hitch a ride on the back of someone who can swim, mewed the cat. They looked at the other animals lining up on the riverbank. The ox looks pretty strong, said the cat, and we're both so small and light, perhaps he won't mind carrying us. Aw, friendship! Friendship! They asked the ox politely if he would give them a lift, and the ox, being a decent sort of chap, agreed.

Oh, my God. I love this so much, although I'm kind of scared. It's really sweet so far. So far. So far. They jumped lightly onto his broadback. The ox waded slowly into the water and started to swim. He was indeed extremely strong, and it wasn't at all bothered by the river's dangerous currents.

As they got nearer to the far bank, they could see the Jade Emperor waiting on the shore. The rat desperately wanted to win the race. Aw. If I'm first in the race, he thought to himself, I'll be first in the calendar. Very important. Yes. And I feel like also the rat is such a underestimated animal. Like people don't like rats.

People talk down about rats. So I kind of love this for him. I do love this for him. But we're also about to find out why there's the idiom of calling people who double cross you a fucking rat. Because they're very ambitious. Yeah, they're very, they're ambitious kings, rats are. Okay.

He looked at the cat perched on the ox's back beside him. If the cat weren't here, he thought, the ox would be able to swim even faster. And what if the cat reaches the Jade Emperor before I do? Oh, no. Not your best friend. Some people are terrible. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. He reached out his paws and pushed his friend the cat into the river. The cat was swept away by the whirling waters, and that's why there's no cat in the Chinese calendar.

I didn't think there was. You had me wondering, because I was like, is there a year of the cat? I don't think there is. Oh, man, that's so fucked up. It is so fucked up. And they were friends. They were friends. They were friends. I know.

I'm so sad, but also go on. I'm really, I love it. It's still a great story. It's a great story. When the ox reached the far bank of the river, he began to lumber toward the Jade Emperor. He was quite surprised when the rat jumped off his back and scuttled towards the Emperor, just pipping him at the post. The rat had won. And this is why, although they used to be friends, cats hate rats and we'll try to kill them if they see them.

It stands to reason. I think that's fair. It makes perfect sense. It is fair. The ox didn't really mind being second, as it still showed how strong he was. Third came the tiger, who had swum powerfully against the strong currents, which kept pushing him downstream. Next came the rabbit. She had tried to cross the river by jumping from stone to stone.

When there were no more stones, she thought she had lost the race and was afraid she might drown. Then a big log floated past, so she jumped on that and clung on for dear life. And to her surprise, the log floated quickly all the way to the riverbank and the rabbit arrived in fourth place. The Jade Emperor was very surprised that the mighty dragon only arrived in fifth place. Because the dragon doesn't give a fuck. Dragon's like, I'll get there when I get there. Yeah. That's what I imagine anyway.

I don't I don't hustle for a dragon is neither late or is never late nor is he early precisely when he means to I would have thought you would have been here first he said as you can fly well said the dragon I had to stop and send rain to some poor farmers whose crops were dying of drought then I saw a poor little rabbit clinging onto a log floating on the river so I blew gently to send the log safely to the riverbank. Dragons fucking rule. So far, dragons,

dragons the best one. Dragon is the best one so far. I really doubt. There's no way anybody's ever going to make snake the best one. And are we surprised? Dragons are the best. I should have, I should have predicted that.

But. That the dragon would be the best one. Yeah, sorry. That's why I asked the question. Oh. Or snake and dragon. No, they are different. Yep.

They are. Okay. The Jade Emperor was impressed by the dragon's kindness. Then he saw the horse galloping towards them. Everyone thought the horse would be in sixth place, but just as he slowed to a trot, the snake, who had been hiding coiled up in his hoof, uncoiled himself wriggled out of the horses,

and slid towards the Jade Emperor. Hot damn. Curled up in my hooves. That's adorable. Ha ha, get in there. The horse was so surprised that he jumped backward. So the snake took sixth place and the horse had to be content with the seventh. Mm-hmm.

It makes sense. I need this cartoon in my life. Me too. This has to exist somewhere. I'm sure. I'm sure it's been animated somewhere somehow by someone. We'll have to look for it. Mm-hmm.

The next three animals arrived together. They were the rooster, the monkey, and the goat. They had worked together to cross the river. The rooster had found a raft. The goat had eaten a path to the river through the weeds. And the monkey had managed to steer the raft across the river. The Jade Emperor was very pleased to hear of such excellent teamwork. He declared the goat eighth, the monkey ninth, and the rooster tenth.

Hell yeah. I love teamwork. In 11th place, teamwork. It makes the dream work. Yeah, it does. In 11th place was the dog. What kept you? asked the Jade Emperor. Everyone knows you're a really good swimmer.

The water was so cool and clear, woofed the dog. And it seemed so long since I last had a proper bath, I couldn't resist the temptation to have a splash in the shallows before I crossed the river. That sounds like a dog. It sounds like a dog. You were too busy barking and playing. Too busy vibe in. Yep.

Way too busy. driving. The Jade Emperor waited and waited to see whether any other animals would finish the race. He was just about to give up and go back into his palace when up trotted the pig. I'm awfully sorry I'm late, said the pig, but I had to stop for a mid-morning snack and then lunch and then an afternoon snack and then tea. And then I felt so sleepy I had to stop for a little nap. Oh, that's for supper. Oh, I love the pig so much. Me too. I honestly, I am year of the horse, but I hard relate to the pig. Hell yeah So the pig was just in time To be the 12th animal of the Zodiac And that is how the 12 animals Of the Chinese Zodiac were chosen, the end

Amazing, no notes That was so fun I know, I love it It's a great story All right And I think I got You got two Yeah, I would say two points

Although saying the Zodiacs are in competition I mean it could have been something else It could have been something else. I love that friendship was the motif. Although it kind of ended poorly a little bit, which makes me sad. Only for the cat. The monkey, the rooster, and the goat all work together. You know, the ox was a good buddy.

The dragon was great. The dragon was a real, real friend. The dragon's like, I'll arrive when I get there. I'm fun. Okay. I'm going to see who it could help on the way. I'm not worried about it. Making it rain.

I love Chinese dragons. We need to read more fairy tales with Chinese dragons. Agreed. Agreed. In fact, don't be surprised if that's my next story. Because I would love that. I think you should do that. We need more of that.

The next story I'm going to tell you, this is also a Chinese fairy tale. This one is, this is actually from a book that my mom got me for my birthday. So thank you, Mom. It's Chinese Myths and Folktales. Hell yeah. New book alert. Yeah. And I think it's the Barnes & Noble edition.

It's a new book alert. New book alert. Have a little sound in there. Every time we get a new book. I should do a little sound effect. We'll see if I do. Yeah, that sounds like a lot of work. Okay.

This story, I selected in honor of it being Year of the Horse. The Girl with the Horse's Head or the Silkworm Goddess. Hell yeah. You may have two predictions. Okay. The Girl with the Horse's Head. Oh, I love that. And then the Silkworm Goddess.

That gives me different vibes altogether. I will say, I did not expect where this is going. The silkworm, goddess makes me think there's an important dress, maybe, or important clothes. And then, hmm, the girl of the horse's head gives me, there's a wizard or a magician. a foot.

Those are my two predictions. Love them. Okay, here we go. The girl with the horse's head or the silkworm goddess. In the dim ages of the past, there was once an old man who went on a journey. No one remained at home save his only daughter and a white stallion. The daughter fed the horse day by day, but she was lonely and yearned. for her father. So it happened that one day she said in jest to the horse,

if you will bring back my father to me, then I will marry you. That seems oddly specific for a jest. Yeah, it's a little, it's, don't joke about that stuff. Oh, I should have predicted horse, like head getting cut off. Anyway, sorry. I feel like horse murder was right there. I know. It really was. But specific, anyway.

You don't know though. You don't even know. I don't know. I don't even know. But I will know. You'll know very soon. No sooner had the horse heard her say this that he broke loose and ran away. He ran until he came to the place where her father was.

When her father saw the horse, he was pleasantly surprised, caught him and seated himself on his back. And the horse turned back the way he had come, neighing without pause. Wow. That horse could have done that all that time, too. Just think. That would kind of pissed me off. You knew where he was the whole

time? Just like... Well, I mean, the man went on a journey on purpose. His daughter just got lonely and was joking and saying like... And the horse was like, you got it, babe.

Uh-huh. Uh-huh. What can be the matter with this horse? Thought the father. Something must surely have gone wrong at home. So he dropped the reins and rode back.

And he fed the horse liberally because he had been so intelligent, but the horse ate nothing. And when he saw the girl, he struck out at her with his hooves and tried to bite her. Oh, geez. Horses are, you know, very intense lovers. I guess. I think this could get real weird real fast. It gets weird in a different way.

This surprised to the father. He questioned his daughter and she told him the truth just as just as it had occurred. You must not say a word about it to anyone, spoke her father, or else people will talk about us. And he took down his crossbow, shot the horse, and hung his skin in the yard to dry. Oh, yep. Then he went on his travels again. Well, bye. Well, bye.

Don't offer to marry the horse. She didn't follow through. No. That's going to bite her. One day, his daughter went out walking with the daughter of a neighbor. When they entered the yard, she pushed the horsehide with her foot and said, What an unreasonable animal you were wanting to marry a human being? What happened to you served you right?

Wow. That's a little harsh. Way harsh. It was your idea. It was your idea. But before she had finished her speech, the horse hide moved, rose up, and wrapped itself about the girl and ran off. Ooh, spooky. I know.

Spooky. It's a ghost. A horse ghost. This story should be in a magic horses, a book of magic horses. I know. Ruth. You did not, you did not search hard enough for true quality, nasty horse stories. Horrified, her companion ran home to her father and told him what had happened.

The neighbors looked for the girl everywhere, but she could not be found. At last, some days afterward, they saw the girl hanging from the branches of a tree, still wrapped in the horsehide, and gradually she turned into a silkworm and wove a cocoon. Oh, yeah, that is weird. Right? That's real weird. Very weird. Like, I would actually, I would love to see this short movie. This seems like a horror.

It is a horror. This is a body horror for sure. I love it. Yeah. And the threads which she spun were strong and thick. Her friend then took down the cocoon and let her slip out of it. And then she spun the silk and sold it at a large profit. I love her friends like, I'm not going to let this go away.

He dumps the worm out. The worm that used to be her friend. I'll take that. But the girl's relatives longed for her greatly. So one day the girl appeared riding in the clouds on her horse, followed by a great company, and said, In heaven, I have been assigned to the task of watching over the growing of silkworms. You must year for me no longer.

Yay! Yay! And thereupon they built temples to her in her native land, and every year as the silkworm sees, And every year at the silkworm season, sacrifices are offered to her and her protection is implored. And the silkworm goddess is also known as the girl with the horse's head. The end. Did she have a horse's head, though?

She was wrapped up in a horse's dead skin. So, like, technically. That's my fix for the story is that at some point she ends up with a horse's head. Right. Or maybe we just don't call it that and we just call it the silkworm goddess. I think we should just call it the silkworm goddess. But I like that they attempted to include the horse part because that is a larger part of the story. But maybe it should be called instead like the girl who didn't marry a horse or something.

Horse murder. Horse murder. Why didn't I predict that? Horse murder, China edition. Zero out of two points. Yep. Zero for two on that one. I didn't get any points on that one.

But I liked it. I enjoyed that story. It's good. And I do. I want to see the horror movie. Yeah. Me too. I mean, I guess it has a happy ending.

It does. She becomes a goddess. What's the problem? She gets wrapped up in a horse cargass and becomes a silkworm. And then her friend uses that. A heavenly being. Yeah. To make important clothes.

Maybe have silk. It didn't say she wove it into any kind of cloth garment, into any kind of garment. Yeah, you're right. Yeah. But is that not the dream? Murder a horse. Become a worm. make your best friend rich

No, that's not the dream Is that not the dream? No Did you have a fix for that one? No, no, I don't think so. I think it's pretty great. I'm surprised your fix wasn't she marries the horse? I don't actually, no, no, I don't think so.

You don't have to marry the horse. It was a joke. She didn't follow through with her promise and then she becomes a goddess. I don't know. She did. I mean, I don't know. Maybe if the horse had lived and she had married the horse,

she would have become a goddess of something else. Because obviously the horse was magic. I think it was just, well, maybe. It might have been a magic horse. I have so many questions. I do. As usual, I want more information. But also, I don't know.

know. I say stuff to Obie all the time. That does not mean that I want Obie to take anything I tell him seriously. Have you ever promised to marry him? I've said a lot of things to Obie. I don't think I've said that particular thing. But I make a lot of jokes about Kia's my tiny baby child. No, I don't think that's a joke. That's true. That's just true. This is true. And then I also tell him he should get a job. Yeah. That would be nice to have a little extra income. Yeah. I don't think that's a joke either. It's not a joke either. Maybe I'm not joking enough with the dog. But the point is, I think the horse took her joke a little too seriously.

I don't think she should bury the horse. All right. I'm sad the horse is dead, though, because, like, yeah. The horse was on it. The horse was a true friend. Just like, you say, okay, I'm on it. ran and got her dad. Do you think she should have married the horse? Maybe.

I mean, the promise is a promise. I definitely don't think the horse should have died. No, I think shooting the horse was crazy. Mm-hmm. That was rude. You know, I mean, my, I guess my fix for the story is like, something to do with the father, you know? I do like that dads in these stories are out there killing their animal bridegrooms.

Just like, nope. Oh, yeah. This isn't happening. We are nipping out right in the bud. Right in the bud. You're making no demands of me. She may have promised you, but I promised you shit. I think, okay, my fix for the story is the horse doesn't get shot.

The horse gets like banished and then has his own. horsey journey. But then does she become a silkworm goddess? No, I guess not. I mean, that's okay. I think. I don't know. I don't know.

I like it so much. I like the story. No, no fix. Yeah, it's a good one. It's a good one. I like it. Yeah. Okay.

Okay. I am excited to let you know that we received a book of magic adventures by Ruth Manning Sanders. somebody sent this to us, sent us two of these books. And it didn't come with a note, but I'm assuming it's either from Melissa or Chris. Oh my God. I'm so excited. It didn't come with a note. So whoever sent us a book of magic adventures, thank you so much. Thank you so much. We love you. Melissa and Mabbs Media and Chris, we love that you guys are publishing the books again. And it's just, I don't know, literally the best.

So please, everyone, go buy these books. They're in our bookshop.org. You can buy them on Amazon. You can buy them, I think, directly from Mab's Media. So go check it out. Amazing cover art, by the way. Yeah, I love that of like two people, people clinging to a very Robin Jacques dragon.

I think, and it's actually just one person, and it's like a princess. Oh, is it just one person? My screen's a little. blarry. I know. It's not perfect. Oh, I can see it now. One of Robin Jacques's amazing, silly-looking dragons.

I love it so much. Incredible. So anyway, I'm going to read you The Fiddler in Hell. And this story is from Russia. Oh, my God. I'm so excited. And I'll send you your book soon. But yeah, I'm so excited to get this in the mail.

It was a very nice surprise. Very cool. I like how they did the cover too. So pretty. Okay. Ooh, okay. Three predictions for the fiddler in hell. And I think we'll both have the same fix for it.

I'm excited. Maybe I don't know. We'll see. Fiddling competition. I mean, it's right there. Gotta do it. It's exactly, as soon as I read that, I was like, well, the devil went down to Georgia.

Exactly. He's looking for a silver steel. Sold a steel. He was in a bind because he was way behind and he was willing to make a deal. I always think of Futurama and how Fry is like, wouldn't a golden fellow weigh hundreds of pounds sound crummy? That's such a funny, funny line. Oh, my God.

Time for the drum solo. Anyway, sorry. Very niche. I've got to rewatch that episode. It's very funny. It's amazing. Okay. Sorry, one prediction deep.

No, that was my fault. Oh, are you feeling floaty yet? This is only my second. This is, I've just started my second one. I wouldn't qualify what I'm feeling as floaty. It's also interesting because I'm, also hungry because I didn't really, I haven't eaten a lot today. So I'm wondering if I'm, am I feeling floaty because of the adaptogens in my drink? Or am I feeling floaty because I'm hungry

or both? Chug, chug, you have to finish that by the time I'm done with my story. I'm going to sip on it while you're telling me the story. Um, I love drugs. Title A episode. Drugs. I'm kidding. That's my prediction. Oh, drugs. Yeah, great.

Drugs. Love that. Also, we could totally make I Love Drugs the title of the episode. I feel like we've said so much funny shit, though. We have ideas. I'm excited to read, I'm excited to re-listen to this one. And, hmm. Would the fiddler isn't dead make sense as a prediction?

I'm thinking of sort of like a... Yep. He had to, like, he went to hell some other way besides dying. Yeah, I know that totally makes sense. Okay. Fiddler not dead. Okay. All right.

Let me tell you the fiddler in hell. One night a fiddler who had been at merrymaking in the town was strolling home. But the night was dark and the fiddler was heedless. He came to a hole in the road and fell through it. Where did he fall to? Hell! Down, down, down, down into hell. That third prediction is hot on.

Score one for Abby! The fiddler blinked and looked about him. Hello, hello, here was someone he knew. It was old Paribondi, who had been in his life a very rich man, and had entertained at his table the grandest people in the neighborhood. old Pera Bondi had often engaged the fiddler to play for him during those dinners. And after the dinners that were starting off immediately doing Dante's Inferno and all of the rich people are in hell. Sorry, after his...

No, immediately. Immediately. It's excellent. Mm-hmm. So, yeah, he played for Parabondi in his great hall. And here was old Pera Bondi sitting in a tub of fire. with only his head and neck sticking out. That sounds pretty awful.

As he deserves probably. Oh, sir, oh sir, said the fiddler. It grieves me to the soul to see you here. I cannot understand how it has come about. And you and your life were so generous and open-handed. No, no, groaned old Paribandi. Not generous. And he's also sitting in a, like, flaming tub.

So I'm not going to, but I imagine he's probably screaming. this. Only flattered to entertain and be made much of by the rich. To the poor folk of earth, I never gave a half penny. And if such folk came begging to my door, I have them driven away with whips. And so I am justly punished. I am beaten with rods. I am torn by demons long nails.

And if that were not enough, I am made to sit for hours on end in this tub of fire. boo who boo who but fiddler oh wait sorry but fiddler I hoard it as well as spent

I filled two large barrels with the brim to the brim with money one I filled with gold coins and the other with silver these barrels I hid the one filled with gold coins I buried under the gateway of my house the one filled with silver coins I buried under the

floor of my stables. If ever you get out of this accursed place, go to my three sons and tell them where the money is buried and distribute the money along the poor and the needy. Ah, if this is done, perhaps the Lord in heaven will forgive me and lift me out of my misery and permit me to creep into some humble corner of paradise. Oh, see, here they come the devils with their whips of flames to beat and torment me. Yes. Yes. Oh. Oh my goodness. But also, how lucky for you that this guy just tripped down here and you might have a small chance at doing better. Yeah.

It's not too little too late, I guess. I guess not. At least he's seeing the error of his ways now that he's sitting in a tub of fire. Yeah, it took a tub of fire to do it, but better late than never. You should have known the price of evil. Everybody goes into Nightmare by Avenge Sevenfold. Yeah. Oh my God, I love that song. Me too, me too. And with screams of laughter and mocking howls, in rushed hundreds of devils through the open gates of hell. Ah, our little pet bear Bondi shrieked at the devils. See him there so prettily sitting in his fiery tub. Come, let us pinch him with our burning fingers. Let us scratch him with our long nails. That as howls may make music for our listening ears. But see there, who is this? a new soul for us to torment?

Certainly not, said the fiddler indignantly. I am an honest fiddler who has so far lived a blameless life. You must blame the moon, not me for my coming here. If the moon had been shining as she ought, I should never. A fiddler! Scream the devils. Aha, what luck! Play up now, Fiddler. Give us some pretty music that we may dance. Okay. Yeah, exactly.

That's how you get out of here. also blaming the moon reminds me of those videos you've been sending me for the past couple of days he's so funny just like talking shit about planets is the funniest take i love it saturn is a fat slob or whatever she is saying so good i don't know just being unimpressed by space and finally having someone else feel the same way makes me feel validated and he's very funny Saturn is cock-blocking Earth and we could have so many more moons We could have more moons But Saturn has like over 200 It's ridiculous

Absolutely greedy Moon hoarding That's so funny The Fiddler would not have fallen into hell If we had more moons Also I love that he's like It sounds like he's blaming a woman Like because he calls her her

Like if she were shining How she was supposed to be I don't know a little bit of like, fuck you dude, maybe pay attention where you're going. But anyway. I also like that he said, blameless life so far. I think so far is an excellent qualifier. Actually, it's so funny that this is a Russian fairy tale because it gives me very Irish vibes.

It really, really does. Right. And I just love that the devils are like, you're a fiddler. Fuck yeah. Play us a tune. We're going to dance. They're just partiers. I love these devils.

Me too. So the fiddler, very willing to divert the devil's attention from the poor old suffering paribondi. Is he still poor? Is he poor? I don't know. He just told you he was a piece of shit, but... All right. He sat down on an upturned tub and began to play.

And the devil's joined hands in a ring around him and began to dance. My word, how they danced. leaping high, kicking out their legs, waving their fiery arms, snapping their long, nailed fingers, screaming with laughter and showing all of their gleaning, sharp-pointed teeth.

Oh, okay. Also very, uh, fairy-esque, kind of too, anyway. Yeah, absolutely. This does, this feels very Irish. Right. They forgot all about Peribondi, and they didn't bother to stoke up the fire in his tub.

And the flames in the tub died down and went out, so poor old Parabondi was for the first. first time being eased of his torment. Oh, goody. Oh, how nice for him. I guess this means the fiddler. The fiddler is a nice person. Yes. Yeah, he cares about him. He's like, I played for you once. Yeah. You paid me to come play for you. You paid me. Sending away poor people with whips and hoarding money. And you just told me that. But anyway. So for three. years the fiddler played without ceasing. Three years?

Okay, this man's not worth three years of your life playing without ceasing. And, well, I don't know if it was for him necessarily, but also, like, don't torture me. That is such a good and fair point. I think he's got a couple motivators. So for three years, he played without ceasing and the devils danced without ceasing. And then the fiddler laid aside his fiddle. and asked for a cup of wine, for his mouth was very dry. Drugs!

And they brought him a cup of wine, and he drank it and prepared to play again. There's some mystery about this, little brothers, he said to the devils, up on earth I could scarcely play for one evening without breaking a string, but down here I play on and on, and the strings remain whole. Thanks be to God! And as soon as he said the words, thanks be to God. Snap! the strings of his fiddle broke.

Yeah. What a calamity. Don't. Don't do that. It seems I shall have to leave you for a while, my friends, said the fiddler. I must go back up to earth and get my fiddle fitted with new strings. No need for that, cried one of the devils. He rushed away and came back with a handful of cat gut, which he busied himself fitting

on to the fiddle. But when the fiddler took up his bow to play. play again. What happened? Twing! Every single string broke. Again and again, the devils tried to fit the fiddle with new strings, and again and again, the strings broke. The devil stamped and howled in their disappointment, like a nursery full of naughty children. They did so want to go on dancing.

They agreed at last to let the fiddler go up to earth and get new strings for his fiddle, but they sent a devil with him to keep an eye on him and to make sure of his coming back. And whether it was a long way or a short way they had to go, the fiddler and his guardian devil were up on earth again and had arrived in the fiddler's native village before you could count to ten. Now it's so happened that on a day a friend of the fiddlers was getting married. And when the new strings had been fitted onto the fiddle, the fiddler said to his attendant devil,

After the wedding, there will be a feast. Let us go to the wedding, and then we shall be invited to the feast. And after the feast, I will strike up a merry tune on my fiddle, and all of the people will dance, there will be plenty of pretty girls. And if you disguise yourself as a handsome lad, you can take your pick of the pretty girls for partners. What do you say, old bellow?

Doesn't that appeal to you? Galaxy brain idea. Fantastic. Oh, it did appeal to the devil. Oh, I got. He snapped his fingers, and there in a moment he stood as pretty a young lad as you could wish to see

and dressed in the smartest of smart tunic and hose. I love it so much. Nice. Now let us go, said the devil, smirking at himself in a little glass that he carried in his pocket. But we must remember to be back before the cockcrow.

Gotta do that. Cockrow is a long way off, laughed the fiddler, and he led the devil among his friends who were just then coming out of the church. Fiddler, Fiddler, where have you been? All this long while, cried his friends. Oh, in many strange places.

said the fiddler. But you see I haven't forgotten you. Allow me to introduce my friend to you. Mr. Unbeknown, whom I met on my travels. He won't lack partners when the time comes for dancing. He's as neat on his toes as the devil himself. Ha ha ha, ha, ha, ha. Ha ha.

So the fiddler and the disguised devil took their seats at the wedding feast. And after the feast was ended, the table cleared and pushed back against the wall. The fiddler sat in a corner and began to play, and they all began to dance. Some of them danced well, and some of them danced not so well. But of all of the dancers, none could compare in elegance or grace with the fiddler's friend, Mr. Unbeknown. Mr. Unbeknown. I love it. Me too.

Every girl in the room was eager to have him for a partner, and the bride herself paid him such attention as nearly brought on a fit of sulks in her newly married husband. The life of the party. So they made Mary throughout the evening, taking no thought of time. Clocks ticked on, struck midnight, struck one o'clock, two o'clock, three o'clock, four. And still the company's tense. And still the fiddler played for them until the eastern sky grew bright and roosters began to crow and Mr. Unbeknown, having gallantly handed his latest partner to a seat,

strolled over to the fiddler and whispered, dawn in the sky, back to hell we must fly. The fiddler smiled, Back to hell you go. The fiddler smiled, pity to break up the party, he said, and he went on playing and the company went on dancing. Cockadoodle do, cockadoo do, cockadoo do. The roosters crowing louder more insistently. One dance ended, another about to begin,

and the pretty girls making eyes at the fascinating stranger, Mr. Unbeknown, each one anxious to be chosen as his next partner. But now Mr. Unbeknown wasn't heeding the pretty girls, nor was he dancing. He was standing at the fiddler's side, scowling and whispering in his ear. Come, come, enough for this nonsense. Just one more tune, said the fiddler. Our friends are enjoying themselves so much. They are.

This devil is not nearly worried enough. This is a lit party. He said before the cock crows, the cocks have been crowing. And he went on playing, and the company went on dancing. Mr. Un... Like, this crowd, can you imagine staying out that late dancing? the whole time. See, but people used to get married real young.

That's for sure. I maybe could have done that, you know. When you're 18. In between 18 and 25, I could do that. Mr. Unbeknown's browns were frowning. Mr. Unbeknown's lips were twitching. Mr. Unbeknown was pulling at the Fiddler's sleeve. Mr. Unbeknown was muttering in the Fiddler's ear.

Come, Ero. Come, Ero. Come! But the fiddler shook Mr. Umbenone's hands off his sleeve and went on playing until, with a loud howl, Mr. Umbenone gave a leap through the window and hurried back to hell. The fiddler laid down his bow and laughed. My friends, said he, there was an old saying about entertaining angels unawares, but it may surprise you to know that you, unawares, have been entertaining. A devil! Dun, done, done! And whilst they all crowded around him, he told them his story. Now, he said, when the story was ended, just one more dance and so to bed. But that last dance was not a very hearty affair. For though the fiddler was now in high spirits, the rest of the company were more than a little shaken by what he had told them.

Yeah. But I mean, happy for him, though. I guess. I feel like it should have been a party. That's one of my favorite. they were in the mood to dance till dawn. Mm-hmm. So at last the fiddler stopped playing and they all went home.

That is, except for the fiddler, who went to call on old Parabondi's three sons to tell them about meeting poor old Bore-Parabondi in hell and to give them their father's message. The three sons were good lads. They did exactly what their father had desired. They dug up the barrels and distributed the money among the poor. But they each kept just one gold for themselves, not to. to spend, but to remind them of their father and to hold between their clasped hands as they knelt down and prayed to heaven for his deliverance from that tub of fire. As for the fiddler, he left the three

brothers to their prayers and went to the priest to tell him also the sad story of Pairibondi. Oh, poor old who. And the priest knelt down and prayed for the soul, Pairbondi, and the fiddler knelt down and prayed with him and all these prayers were heard in heaven. And the Lord of heaven sent an angel down into hell. At the side of the angel, the devils ran to hide themselves in corners. And the angel lifted poor old Bear Bondi out of the tub of fire and carried him to heaven, where in some quiet nook, he lived in peace ever after. Nope.

So, obviously, I think we have the same fix for this story. Yeah. But my other fix is I think it would have been really fun if, because I can't help it, Abby. I love friendship. I really wanted the fiddler to become friends with that devil and for the devil to want to stay dancing and partying with him on earth. Me too. I actually would love that as a fix for the story if Mr. Unbeknown just stayed and became more and more human. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. And maybe he helps Maybe he helps the fiddler get Paribondi out of hell or something, if that has to be heard of it. But also maybe make Parabondi a little bit more lovable because I don't get it. I don't get it. You know, I guess he like felt bad after he was suffering for what he had done. But like, I feel like wouldn't anybody like, like, like, oh, now you are receiving consequences.

Yeah, exactly. Like, of course, now you feel bad. That's the point. It's the point. How suffering in hell, if you believe in that, if you believe in that, it's supposed to be eternal. That's the deal. That's what they're trying to scare us with in the first place.

And it didn't work on you. And you're fine. Yeah. Like, oh, a happy ending for the rich people. Yeah, no. Absolutely not. I think that it's a perfectly just ending. that he realized, oh shit, you really will be burns in a hot tub for all eternity, warrants his sons.

His sons take that lesson to heart and go, oh, shit. Yeah. Let's make sure we give all this money away. And then they don't go to hell. And that's, that's Bondi's reward. And maybe the fiddler takes that to heart too. So less about saving old Pirate Bondi and more devil-fiddler friendship. Yeah.

And hanging out and having a little bit more. a great time. I love that. That's way better. That's way better. I think there should be a traveling duo where the handsome fiddler shows up, makes the party last all night, and everybody gets to dance with Mr. Unbeknown. Yeah. I feel like that would be. That's my fix. They can join our cinematic universe of, you know, maybe they solve hauntings or whatever. They find rich people and scare them into... Yes, they scare sinners straight. Yeah.

Or scare sinners gay. They Christmas carol and out of them. That is it. That's it. That's the fix. They go around the region, Christmas caroling misers. The devil, like, they get invited to these rich people's parties because they're a good dancer and fiddler duo. And then the devil, like, takes off his handsome lad persona and becomes.

a scared devil and freaks them the fuck out and says if you don't fucking I don't know stop being a piece of shit and hoarding wealth and not helping anyone you're going to hell and then yeah exactly and then they do better I love it that's the fix that's the one yay you're a genius I thought that was a cute story I liked it a lot it was cute I liked it very much too besides I believe I got with a for old parapondi Two points. Yeah, you did. Drugs.

And the killer was not dead. Yeah. Incredible. Very sadly, there was no fiddling competition, but I know. I was expecting that too. You know, I feel like maybe we can add that. Maybe one of the other devils. Oh, there you go.

Can also fiddle. But then he wouldn't need new strengths because it would be a second fiddle. No, that's true. Anyway. Yeah. How are you feeling? Are you floating? You haven't finished it, but.

I haven't finished it technically. Floatation update. I don't know. My skin feels a little tingly, but I also could just be cold. I'm in a good mood, but that could just be because I enjoy doing our podcast. It's really, I have a lot of energy. I have more energy than I usually have this time of day. So that could be something.

Mm-hmm. I'm feeling very cheerful and agreeable right now, but I'm not sure if that's like, I'm not sure if that's floaty or fully socialized. Feeling well socialized. Who knows? We'll probably never know. We'll probably never know, but it tastes good. It's a pleasant drink. It's nice to have a fun little drink.

Maybe we should reach out and have them sponsor us. Maybe. So we can do more experiments. More experiments would be good. On that note, thank you very much for listening to Ferry tale fix. We're so grateful that you include us in your taking care of yourself routine. There are a couple of ways that you can support the podcast. You can for free 99.

leave us a review or a rating on whatever podcast app you happen to be listening to. Today's word is... Oh, come out where your zodiac is. Drugs. Oh, drugs. Or what your Chinese zodiac year is, yes. Because I want to know. Or drugs.

Both are good. Drugs. I love drugs and zodiacs, so. Either or both is fun. fine. Abby's ready for January to be over. It's almost there. It's, we're, we're about halfway there and I'm, two more weeks. I'm already ready. I'd like to do more drugs again. Um, good, now I'm thinking about that instead of the next part of the outro. You can also follow us on Instagram, um, engage with our posts, uh, when we feel like making,

them we don't always so you know um you can also go to our patreon patreon.com forward slash fairy tale fix pod where you find you can find a variety of things just for free it's free to sign up for the feed but you can also sign up to support us if you've got a couple of dollars starting at three dollars you get bonus episodes and other extra content that we feel like making and the rewards just keep getting better from there. A reminder to our job creating dragons, check your address so that we can send you a nice thing. And so that's it, right?

Yes, yeah. That's what we usually talk about. Yep, nailed it. Nailed it. Thank you. I'm killing it today. I think you are feeling that float. I must be feeling floaty because I'm feeling

I'm yeah, I don't know, I'm feeling a little high. It's a great placebo effect or just a great drug either way. And so, I don't think you had fixes for either of your stories. I liked them both so much. The father in the silkworm goddess story got lost in the wood somewhere. and died, I guess. I don't know. I don't like that either.

No fixes. Everybody was fine. And in my story, the devil and the fiddler became super good friends and decided to scare other rich people into, you know, being good people before they die and before they go to hell. And old paribaldi stayed in hell and who cares about him? Who the fuck cares? about him. And they all lived except old Baribaldi. Mm-hmm.

Perbandi. Perbaldi. Perbaldi? And everyone by him lived happily ever after the end. The end.