Fairy Tale Fix - 26: It’s Dragon Day

Episode Date: September 14, 2021

It’s Dragon Day! Abbie tells the story of the infamous and fearless Hidesato, whose heroic demeanor catches even the eye of a dragon king, in My Lord Bag of Rice. Kelsey tells a very different dragon story in Yanni, where–as usual–the story is not named after the right hero.

Making podcasts, making podcasts. Oh my goodness. Here we go. Dustin, don't include that. I feel like we do a lot of free promo for Disney. Definitely. Hashtag not sponsored. Welcome to Fairytale Fix, the podcast where we fix fairy tales yep sometimes because they are fucked up yeah they're really messed up we do our best to fix

them with mixed results sometimes they're perfect though sometimes that's true sometimes they are flawless but sometimes they are just bananas foster crazy like just out of this world agreed so much horse violence i'm still there's just so much my god yes i've i have really been trying to block out our Patreon exclusive episodes. There has been a string of horse murder in those. There's so much horse murder in fairy tales. I don't understand what these tavern goers had against horses when they were telling these stories. Why do medieval people hate horses so much? Specifically, I feel like Norwegian tales.

You know, that's true. I think the most horse murder has come from that Osbjornsen and Moe book. Are you a folklorist? Are you a fairytale expert? We need Jack Zipes on this podcast to tell us why there's so much horse murder.

I bet he'd know. I wonder if that's a theme. I've never heard that theme before from anybody else. Not that I've been paying a lot of attention, but I I wonder if that's like a theme. I've never heard that theme before from anybody else. Not that I've been paying a lot of attention, but I just wonder if like anyone else has noticed this. Like, why do horses get murdered so much? It's really sad. But, you know, that probably won't happen today. Hopefully.

Hopefully. I'm pretty sure there's no horse murder in my fairy tale. No promises. You know, spoiler alert, unless I missed it somewhere, but there probably isn't a horse murder. I hope not. I need a little reprieve from that. Just a little break. A little break.

So what's been going on with you? What's been going on with Abby? I joined a gym nice yeah it is it is nice i'm excited about it are you enjoying it no i'm enjoying what it is going to do for my body and my overall longevity. Yeah, I am very much enjoying that. I am enjoying the people at the gym that I chose because it's kind of a smaller gym and it's a strength and conditioning program. And so that means that there's actually like someone teaching the class who can help me with my posture when I'm doing various exercises. And basically, they just have you do as much exercise as you can possibly cram into an hour. So it also feels very condensed,

as opposed to like when I go to free gym stuff, I just kind of wander for like a couple hours doing various exercises until I feel like I'm done. This is much more you go to class, someone says, listen up, these are the exercises we're doing today. And then we're going to do them for an hour and you don't stop moving. And then when you feel like you're about to die, you can go home. Those can definitely be helpful if you don't know like what to do. Yeah. Or I feel like I'm learning more about what to do because they're also really helpful. Like they're doing like cleans and snatches which is basically when you take a barbell off the ground you roll it up your body and then you use your hips to propel the bar over your head oh nice that sounds dangerous it can be um especially if you start

getting up into like heavier weights but because you're we've been told that the the human shoulders are the weakest like little stupidest things like on our body and so they can't actually lift much weight on their own but if you use you if you use your the rest of your lower body to propel the bar over your head then you can get more weight up there don't try this at home nope please try this under the eye of a trained professional or in like a gym with a spotter or something but like but so we're learning like stuff like that they're also they i have been told that if i stick to the plan and i like do various exercises that i may actually be able to do a pull-up in a year.

Snap. So that's my goal. My goal for this year is one pull-up. All right. And we'll see what happens. I will try. I had a personal trainer who was great like several years ago. I think it was back in 2016.

And that was at my strongest. She did a lot of weights with me. She was really fun. I love her. She was great, actually. And her name is Whitney. Whitney. I don't think she I don't know. She listens to the podcast. We still keep in touch, though. She's so nice. And she helped me do a pull-up, but I think it was an assisted pull-up. It was still really hard. Even assisted, they're super hard. But anyway, that's kind of getting into the weeds a little bit, but I'm kind of excited. I am excited for you. I always think it's fun to learn new things and do something good for your body and for your you know this that's that's sweet sweet serotonin yes yeah those sweet sweet endorphins that's what i

think to myself anytime i go running it's for that sweet sweet serotonin just force your body to produce some of that shit yes Yes, please. On the opposite end of that spectrum, I made pumpkin muffins this morning. Yeah, I love that. Because it's pumpkin season and no one can tell me otherwise. Except have you ever started a recipe and you didn't and then like realized halfway through already starting it that you didn't have all the ingredients that it required yes so i made special kelsey frankenstein pumpkin muffins wait so what were you missing so it called for coconut oil and i didn't have coconut oil so i was like that's fine i'll just use like melted butter and then i'm going down to the recipe and realizing oh it calls for honey I don't have

a half cup honey so I'll do like a fourth cup honey and some maple syrup that's like the same thing right that's the same and then I put in my pumpkin puree and I was like oh wait it doesn't call for a can it calls for like one cup and a little extra pumpkin it's fine a little extra pumpkin won't hurt so it was it was an ordeal i feel like i did not have everything that i needed and it was a little shaky but they actually turned out pretty good oh i just had a bite like i ran i ran out when we took the break i ran out and bit into one is actually pretty good i'm surprised making me amazing. Yeah. So basically, the moral of that story is read all the ingredients first and make sure you have everything before you start.

It's a good moral. I had to do something similar. I think I was only missing one ingredient, but it was a pretty crucial ingredient. I was making chocolate chip cookies. And I realized after I'd already like mixed up all of the flour and the sugar and then I'd like already like whipped in like the egg. And I already whipped in the sugar. And yeah, I already said that. But then you know, the time comes like add the butter. I realized that I only had like one stick when the recipe calls for two sticks, but I did have some margarine in the fridge. So I tried my best to like make the margarine work too, except it doesn't. Like, like if you're going to be making something with

margarine instead of butter, there are a couple of steps that you need to do. Oh, like and a couple of like, you need to alter the ratios of some other ingredients to make that work so that the consistency of the cookie dough is correct yep and then also you don't like melt the margarine the way you do the butter um but i'm dumb so and i've never baked with margarine before so i so i i stuck i stuck a cup of margarine in the microwave i melted that down and then so it was so watery that my like my dough ended up being more like, like pancake dough. Uh huh. Yeah. Oh, no. And so I was like, I can, I can save this. I can save it. And so I just like flour, right? I did.

I just added a little more flour. I added a little more flour. And then i did once i and so once i got it to like a slightly thicker consistency because i didn't want to add too much flour because then like it ruins the flavor of the cookie because then it's just too much flour you know so i still tried to bake them when they were really runny and well actually no no i tried to bake them like a cake i put them in a cake pan oh and. And I made a cookie cake. In one whole cake pan? Yeah. Oh. And like a circular, yeah, cake pan. And so I bake them like a cake. And that was fine. Was it tasty? No, not really. Too much flour. And it turns out butter is very important because butter has a very specific taste.

Baking is a science. Baking is chemistry. And I failed chemistry in high school. That's true. She did. I was there. Yeah, you were there and I was not because I just skipped that class a lot. because I just skipped that class a lot. Yeah, I think I only didn't fail because the teacher really liked me and I was his teacher aid or whatever. Yep.

And he was like, if you grade these papers, I'll make sure you get a C on the final. That's like some A plus teaching right there. I approve. I do know this about chocolate chip cookies. Okay. You can absolutely get away with just one stick. It's a little bit harder to mix everything but it actually makes a thicker cookie which is how

i like it i often only cook with one stick of butter instead of two okay because i like the way it uh fluffs up better interesting okay well that's a that is that is a good tip. So if you ever are out of butter, just use the one. I need to get like a mixer. Because like the thing is, is like if it's harder, it's already hard to mix. If you're just using a wooden spoon and just like your arm. Well, we've got some really fun stuff going on in Fairytale Fix land. If you don't already follow us on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook, definitely do that. Our handle is at FairytaleFixPod.

And we're actually doing a podversary giveaway. So our podversary, our one-year podversary is this month at the end of September. We have been doing this thing. One whole year. Oh, yeah. Of Fairytale Fix. And we're super excited. So we wanted to celebrate with

a giveaway. So we are giving away one of our absolute favorite books from Ruth Manning Sanders, A Book of Dragons. The best one. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. They're all the best one. But I I'm biased. I love A Book of Dragons. Yeah. So we're giving that

away along with a few other things. So make sure to follow us on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook to get all of the details. The giveaway is specifically on Instagram just because there's not really a good way to do it on Twitter or Facebook. So make sure to follow us there and check that out if you want to be part of the giveaway. Also as part of our podiversary celebration we decided it was time to tackle one of the big ones one of the ones that got its own disney movie and we're gonna do my favorite one which is sleeping beauty yay i am very excited we're going to be doing uh a, well, we'll read the original fairy tale, which is a brother's grim fairy tale,

I believe. And then it was adapted by Charles Peralt for the French version. And then Disney developed their sleeping beauty movie from the Charles Peralt version. So we're going to talk, we're going to sort of do some comparisons there and look at all of those things. So we're going to talk, we're going to sort of do some comparisons there and look at all of those things. I also have a couple of Sleeping Beauty novel retellings that I really enjoy that I'll be bringing up.

Spindle's End by Robin McKinley is one of them. So if anyone's ever read that, we'll talk about Spindle's End a little bit. And any other Sleeping Beauty, Briar Rose adjacent things that i can think of between now and then we've been prepping and watching movies and getting recommendations from all of you which would thank you so much for sending out recommendations yeah for what to watch what to read uh we'll be talking about all that stuff because sleeping beauty has been as you might imagine widely covered by a lot of different people in a lot of different formats.

And I'm really excited to talk about that. Me too. Definitely. This is a bit of a sidebar, Kelsey, but I was Googling Sleeping Beauty movies. And one of them is, I don't think, I don't know if it actually has anything to do with Sleeping Beauty, the story. But it's essentially a college student becomes a sex worker for a high-end brothel where customers pay to fondle her while she sleeps. And the movie is called Sleeping Beauty.

I mean, that sounds like a dark movie. Super dark. It sounds like a drama. It sounds like it could get dark. Okay. dark. It sounds like a drama. It sounds like it could get dark. Okay, we ready to do ready to head into our stories? Let's do it. Okay, so I've got the first story today. And I'm going to be reading to you from Japanese fairy tales, which were all compiled by yay, Theodora Ozaki. I just looked her up a little bit to get some context. And she was born in London in 1871 to Baron Saburo Ozaki, who was one of the first

Japanese men to study in the West. And his English lover, Bathia Catherine Morrison. And she grew up in London, but still grew up hearing stories from her father's homeland. And she was inspired by Andrew Lang, who did like the Blue Fairy Book and the Pink Fairy Book and the Green Fairy Book and just all of those. Yeah, that's awesome. Compilations of fairy tales. She was inspired by Andrew Lang to make a Japanese fairy book, which she did. And she published it in 1903.

And what was it called again? It's called Japanese Fairy Tales. And we'll make sure to put that in our show notes. So you can check it out yourself. And she wrote like a really sort of like charming preface to the book where she just talked about how she really enjoyed hearing these stories growing up. She enjoyed telling these stories to all of her friends in London as a child growing up. And she tried to keep them as faithful to their original Japanese tellings as possible.

But she's also, she also mix and matched, she mix and match different retellings based on which endings she preferred. So some of these are sort of a, a smushing together of different versions of these stories, whichever ones were her favorite. And then she also tried to preserve sort of the Japanese expressions in them as well, but translate them in a way that an English speaker would find easier to understand. That's so cool. It's like a modern day Brothers

Grimm or Asbjornson as beyonce and mo yeah yeah she did a lot she did a lot of work on these and really really enjoyed these stories and wanted to bring them uh sort of more into the the western canon that's very cool today we are helping yayo zaki with that work and i'm going to be reading you a story called My Lord Bag of Rice. My Lord Bag of Rice. Okay. So I want you to give me three predictions for My Lord Bag of Rice. Okay.

I predict that the bag of rice will be broken and rice will be everywhere. Okay. I predict that there will be a very helpful talking animal. Okay. And I predict the protagonist will save someone. Okay. I like it. These are all great.

Okay. And without further ado, here is my Lord bag of rice from Japan. Okay, and without further ado, here is My Lord Bag of Rice from Japan. Long, long ago, there lived in Japan a brave warrior known to all as Tawara Toda, or My Lord Bag of Rice. His true name was Fujiwara Hidesato, and there is a very interesting story of how he came to change his name.

One day, he sallied forth. In search of adventure. As heroes do. For he had the nature of a warrior. And could not bear to be idle. Absolutely. As most fairy tale protagonists feel. Absolutely.

They've all got the wandering feet. They can't stay at home. They've got to go out in search of adventure. And Hidesato is no different. So he buckled on his two swords, took his huge bow, much taller than himself, into his hand, and slings his quiver on his back and starts out. He hasn't gone far when he comes to the bridge of Setanokurashi, spanning one end of the beautiful Lake Biwa. He sets foot on the bridge, and he sees lying right across his path a huge serpent dragon. Oh, fuck yeah.

Yeah, you can see why I picked this story. It's the first one I flipped to too. And I was like, this book already gets me. So it comes across this huge dragon lying on the bridge. Its body was so big that it looked like the trunk of a large pine tree. And it took up the whole width of the bridge. of a large pine tree and it took up the whole width of the bridge and one of its huge claws rested on the parapet on one side of the bridge while its tail lay right against the other the monster seemed to be asleep and as it breathed fire and smoke came out of its nostrils

cute so cute so precious are there any illustrations that go with this i don't know if you can see it but there he is hitosato on the bridge with the dragon that dragon does not look as big as described nope i think i think the artist took some liberties with the description but still very cool i like hitosato's outfit yeah beautiful illustration nonetheless yeah yeah gorgeous gorgeous art but definitely some artistic liberties taken with the size on big dragons of the serpent dragon at first hira sato could not help feeling alarmed at the sight of this horrible reptile lying in his path for he must either turn back or walk right over it he is a brave fellow however and putting aside all fear he goes forward dauntlessly nice i love the image that the author is painting of this man because i'm going to see him puff himself up put his hands on his

hips and be like i'm a fucking hero and then he just charges forward anyway wait i forgot i'm a hero that's the kind of confidence we all need it is we should all be more like him so he's a brave man and he puts forward a sphere and he goes forward dauntlessly crunch crunch he stepped now on the dragon's body now between its coils and without even one glance backward he goes on his way. Nice. He had only gone a few steps when he heard someone calling him from behind. And on turning back, he was much surprised to see that the monster dragon had entirely disappeared. And in its place was a strange looking man who was bowing most ceremoniously to the ground.

That is the dragon. bowing most ceremoniously to the ground. That is the dragon. His red hair streamed over his shoulders and was surmounted by a crown in the shape of a dragon's head, and his sea-green robe was patterned with shells. Cool. Very cool. Very magical. Hidesato knew at once that this was no ordinary mortal,

and he wondered at the strange occurrence. Where had the dragon gone in such a short space of time or had it transformed itself into this man and what did the whole thing mean while these thoughts were passing through his mind he boldly strode right back up to the man that had replaced the dragon on the bridge and now addressed him oh i love this guy he's brave as hell he's got cojones he's got cojones. He's got cojones. He's bold, bold as brass. Was it you that called me just now?

Yes, it was I, answered the man. I have an earnest request to make to you. Do you think you can grant it to me? And Hidesato answers, if it is in my power to do so, I will. But first, tell me who you are. And the man replies, I am the dragon king of the lake lake and my home is in these waters just under the bridge hitosado takes this in stride because dragon kings talk to him every day because he's a fucking hero ain't no thing he's totally used to this sort of thing so he says and what is it you have to ask of me the dragon king says i want you to kill my mortal

enemy the centipede who lives on the mountain beyond the dragon king points to a high peak on the opposite shore of the lake i have lived now for many years in this lake and i have a large family of children and grandchildren for some time past we have lived in terror for a monster centipede has destroyed our home and night after night it comes and carries off a member of my family and i am powerless to save them i know it's really it's really dark it's very sad it is like it's also that must be like a gigantic centipede oh it's it's huge you'll see it's terrifying i do not like centipedes me neither i like most bugs like i like spiders are even okay but centipedes

that's a hard pass yeah that's a no from me i'm i'm with the dragon here yeah kill that thing centipedes really do just cross a line in nature it's agreed like you just look at it and then you look up at the sky where the gods live and you're just like too far too far it's obviously like a creature from hell absolutely but even satan even to satan too far bro nothing should have that many legs those are too many legs my man anyway yeah same so anyway so this so essentially this giant bug monster comes and carries off one of his grandchildren every night so it's obviously super upsetting he's not happy with this if it goes on much longer like this not only shall i lose all my children but i myself must fall victim to the monster i am therefore very unhappy and i have

determined that i need to ask the help of a human being for many days with this intention i have waited on the bridge in the shape of the horrible serpent dragon you saw in the hope that some strong brave man would come along but all who came this way as soon as they saw me were terrified and ran away as fast as they could you are the first man i have found able to look at me without fear so i knew at once that you were a man of great courage i beg you to have pity upon me because hira sato just paid him no mind just stopped just bump bump bump stomped right over him love it yep yep yep will you not help me kill my enemy, the centipede? And Hidesato felt very sorry for the dragon king on hearing his story and readily promised to do what he could to help him.

The warrior asked where the centipede lived so that he might attack the creature at once. I really love this guy. He wastes no time. Me too. this guy he was no time me too the dragon king replied that its home was on the mountain mikami but that as it came every night at a certain hour to the palace in the lake it would be better to wait for it there hirisato agrees to this i mean it's just slowing down his very ambitious adventuring timeline but i guess i can go hang out with the dragon king in his palace beneath i guess whatever it's not like it's all i want in my whole life but he's busy he's got adventuring to do i mean i feel like this is a pretty great adventure

so he's conducted to the palace of the dragon king under the bridge and as he follows his host downwards the waters part to let them pass and his clothes doesn't even, and as he follows his host downwards, the waters part to let them pass, and his clothes doesn't even feel damp as he passes through the flood. Never had Hidesato seen anything so beautiful as this palace built of white marble beneath the lake. He had often heard of the Sea King's Palace at the bottom of the sea, where all of the servants and retainers were saltwater fishes, but here was a magnificent building in the heart of Lake Biwa. saltwater fishes but here was a magnificent building in the heart of lake biwa the dainty goldfishes red carp and silvery trout waited upon the dragon king and his guest i really want this to be a movie because i want to see that so that sound beautiful maybe there's an animated version

we can find and we can we can watch because that sounds really gorgeous. Hidesato was astonished at the feast that was spread for him. The dishes were crystallized lotus leaves and flowers and the chopsticks were of rarest ebony. And as soon as they sat down, the sliding doors opened and 10 lovely goldfish dancers came out. And behind them followed 10 red carp musicians with the koto and the samisen. I think that's how you pronounce that maybe apologies goldfish dancers so like goldfish dancers i want i want more information on that you know what immediately came to my head is that scene in fantasia where that goldfish sort of swirls around her own tail do you remember that isn't that pinocchio um cleo i thought it was

fantasia i'm i think i think cleo is in pinocchio but there's also a one of the scenes in fantasia is this fish very seductively like swimming yeah i think that's um probably it's probably like the same artist yeah probably yeah the fantail goldfish yeah yeah yeah i love that so i imagine like a goldfish dancer would be something like that which sounds really beautiful that's what popped into my head anyway this is like duct of goldfish very seductive goldfish she had bright lipstick on as i recall so she was a very sexy goldfish yeah with like those long lashes fantasia's a trip so the goldfish dancers come out the musicians come out thus the hours flew by till midnight and the beautiful music and dancing had banished all thoughts of the centipede

the dragon king was about to pledge the warrior in a fresh cup of wine when the palace was suddenly shaken by tramp, tramp, as if a mighty army had begun to march not far away. But since the centipede has so many goddamn legs. It's probably just that guy. It's just the centipede. Hidesato and his host both rose to their feet and rushed to the great balcony. And the warrior saw on the opposite mountain, two great balls of glowing fire coming nearer and nearer. And the dragon King stood by the warrior's side,

trembling with fear. The centipede, those two balls of fire are its eyes. It's coming for its prey. Now is the time to kill it. I know. Can you imagine? And the description only gets worse.

Enjoy. Hidesato looked where his host pointed and in the dim light of the starlit evening behind the two balls of fire, he saw the long body of an enormous centipede winding round the mountains and the light in its hundred feet glowed like so many distant lanterns moving slowly towards the shore. Isn't that horrifying? It's giving me like the heebie-jeebies.

Yes, like it's on me. Yeah, I feel it. But also just a really beautiful, I just really like the imagery in this book. It's just really, really gorgeous, just really gorgeous evocative imagery. I really like the imagery in this book and just really really gory like just a really just really gorgeous evocative imagery i really like it hit asanto showed not the least sign of fear he tried to calm the dragon king don't be afraid i shall surely kill the centipede just bring me my bow and arrows he's such a badass he's a badass the dragon king did as he was bid and the warrior noted that he had only three arrows left in his

quiver he took the bow and fitting an arrow to the notch took careful aim and let fly the arrow hit the centipede right in the middle of the head but instead of penetrating it glanced off harmless and fell to the ground oh no not daunted hirisato took another arrow yeah he did he's like ain't nothing no big deal ain't nothing i'll get it next time he fitted it to the notch of the bow and let fly and again the arrow hit the mark it struck the centipede right in the middle of its head only to glance off and fall to the ground i don't think that's working bro i think you gotta try a different strategy gotta figure something else out the centipede was clearly invulnerable to weapons when the dragon king saw that even this brave warrior's arrows were powerless to kill the centipede he lost heart and began to tremble with fear oh i know a scared dragon king. I don't feel so bad for him.

The warrior saw that he had now only one arrow left in his quiver. And if this one failed, he could not kill the centipede. He looked across the waters. The huge reptile had wound its horrid body seven times around the mountain and would soon come down to the lake. Nearer and nearer gleamed the fireballs of eyes and the light of its hundred feet began to throw reflections in the still waters. Get it in his eye. Right in his eye. Then suddenly the warrior remembered that he had heard

that human saliva was deadly to centipedes. Huh. I wish this is true. I would spit on every centipede I saw. Oh, no. But this was no ordinary centipede. This was so monstrous that even to think of such a creature made one creep with horror. Hidasato determined to try his last chance.

So taking his arrow and first putting the end of it into his mouth, he fitted the notch to his bow, took careful aim once more and let fly. And there's an illustration of him. Okay. I thought it was going to be the centipede. I was like, I don't want to see it. No, no, no, no. The illustrator was very kind and did not draw the centipede for us. Yeah.

Instead, they drew Hidesato firing his arrow. This time, the arrow again hit the centipede right in the middle of its head, but instead of glancing off harmlessly as before, it struck home to the creature's brain. Nice. Then, with a convulsive shudder, the serpentine body stopped moving

and the fiery light of its great eyes and hundred feet darkened to a dull glare like the sunset of a stormy day then went out in blackness beautiful imagery isn't the writing like the imagery is gorgeous like this is hans christian anderson level of very evocative beautiful imagery i like it a great darkness now overspread the heavens the thunder rolled and the lightning flashed and the wind roared in fury and it seemed as if the world were coming to an end the dragon king and his children and retainers all crouched in different parts of the palace frightened to death for the building was shaken to its foundations but at last this dreadful night

was over day dawned beautiful and clear and the centipede was gone from the mountain so they didn't have to deal with like it's rotting carcass don't have to do clean up because you imagine something large enough to coil around a mountain seven times yeah i was thinking that's gonna be like unpleasant for a while. Very unpleasant. Like the cleanup on that is going to be. A nightmare. A nightmare. But fortunately, that's not that didn't happen.

It was magic. So Hidesato called the Dragon King to come out with him on the balcony for the centipede was dead and he had nothing more to fear. Then all the inhabitants of the palace came out with joy and hid a sato pointed to the lake there lay the body of the dead centipede floating on the water which was dyed red with its blood oh again with the imagery just i know oh that's why i want to see this i want the visual i want the i don't want to see the animated. Yeah. I don't know. I think an animated film would be really cool for this. That would be cool. Maybe...

I'm sure there is one somewhere because it's too cool. It's too... The visuals are too good. Agreed. Also, I was viewing a little background and apparently Fujiwara Hidesato is actually a really famous figure in Japanese folklore. So maybe that would be really cool to get an animated series of his adventures because this is just one of the amazing feats that this man has performed.

I was going to say, it's kind of reminding me of the Ivanverse a little bit. Yeah, a little bit. So the centipede is dead in the water and the water is dyed red with its blood. And the gratitude of the dragon king knew no bounds. The whole family came and bowed down before the warrior, calling him their preserver and the bravest warrior in Japan. Another feast was prepared, more sumptuous than the first. All kinds of fish prepared in every imaginable way, raw, stewed, boiled, roasted, served on coral trays and crystal dishes were put before him, and the wine was the best that Hidesato had ever tasted in his life. To add to the beauty of everything, the sun shone brightly, the lake

glittered like liquid diamond, and the palace was a thousand times more beautiful by day than by night. His host tried to persuade the warrior to stay a few days, but in typical fairy tale fashion, to persuade the warrior to stay a few days, but in typical fairy tale fashion, Hidesato insisted on going home, saying that he had now finished what he came to do and must return. Was he like, that's enough adventure for one day? Yep. Or for a lifetime? For to his credit. That was, that was quite a feat. I'd want to go home too, take a load off, forget that I'd ever seen such a horrible thing. The dragon king and his family were very sorry to see him leave so soon. But since he would go, they begged him to accept a few small presents. So they said in token of their gratitude to him for delivering them from their horrible enemy, the centipede.

As the warrior stood on the porch taking his leave, a train of fish was suddenly transformed into a retinue of men all wearing ceremonial robes and dragon's crowns on their heads to show that they were servants of the great dragon king. And the presents they carried were as follows. First, a large bronze bell. Second, a bag of rice. Third, a roll of silk. Fourth, a cooking pot. And fifth, a smaller bell. And Hidesato did not want to accept all of these presents, but as the dragon king insisted,

he could not well refuse. The dragon king himself accompanied the warrior as far as the bridge and then took leave of him with many bows and good wishes, leaving the procession of servants to accompany Hidesato to his house with all of the presents. The warrior's household and servants had been very much concerned when they found that he did not return the night before, but they finally concluded that he had been kept by the violent storm and had taken shelter somewhere. When the servants on the watch for his return caught sight of him, they called to everyone that he was approaching, and the whole household turned out to meet, wondering what the retinue of men bearing presents and banners that followed him could mean. By the way, I completely forgot that the story was

called My Lord Bag of Rice until you mentioned the bag of rice. Why would you remember that? You mentioned the story at the very top. It says, oh, this guy's name let's find out why it got changed i still have no idea why he's called my lord bag of rice you'll find out you shall find out but we got a little distracted there was a giant centipede to kill it was very distracting so as soon as the dragon king's retainers had put down the presents they vanished and hide sato told all that had happened to him the presents which he had received from the grateful dragon king were found to be of magic power the bell only was ordinary and as hide sato had no use for it he presented it to the temple nearby where it was hung up to boom out the hour of the day over the

surrounding neighborhood the single bag of rice however much was taken for it day after day for the meals of the knight and his whole family, never grew less. The supply in the bag was inexhaustible. The roll of silk, too, never grew shorter, though time after time long pieces were cut off to make the warrior a new suit of clothes to go to the court at New year the cooking pot was wonderful too no matter what was put into it it cooked deliciously whatever was wanted without any firing truly a very economical saucepan hell yeah i would like one of those please me too that sounds like the best one of them all so that's why that is my favorite one of his presents i think he should have been called my lord cooking pot. The fame of Hidesato's

fortune spread far and wide, and as there was no need for him to spend money on rice or silk or fuel for his fire, he became very rich and prosperous and was henceforth known as my lord bag of rice. The end. Nice. That was a gorgeous

story. That was really beautiful. That had nothing to do with the bag of rice. No, like the rice was his present for doing the rest of the story. And just one of them. Yeah, I think my Lord cooking pot. I think that's the coolest gift. So if he's going to get named after one of his magical gifts, I think the cooking pot was the coolest part. But, you know, not like the centipede slayer or.

No. And I'm sure that there's there's perhaps cultural context that we wouldn't get from this story. Well, I thought it was going to be like he fed everyone like he fed villages and things with it. And that's how he became known. That was my assumption was that since it never runs out, he was going to like feed everyone with it. Yeah, you would think, but that's,

but he more like he feeds his, he feeds himself and his whole family and presumably his household. I like to think that with it, if you had an endless supply of food that you would also

hand it out to everybody else. Yeah. So maybe, and so maybe that's it maybe that's the implication of like yeah yeah yeah you killed a giant centipede but what what we're really grateful for is all of the rice like all of the food that we like it should have been called the dragon king or anyway i'm just saying about that guy i think I only got one point because the protagonist did save someone. Yeah, the other two, I don't think so.

Yeah. So just like a little more background sort of about the story is that this Fujiwara Hidesato was a real person. He was a kuge or a court bureaucrat of 10th century Japan. And he was famous for his military exploits and discourage. So like a bunch of different a bunch of different folktales sprung up around him. And there are a bunch of Japanese clans that claim him as an ancestor. Because he was just super famous and super badass you know i bet there's just some like i don't know i love the idea of it being a real historical figure and people just kind of he was so great and so brave he even defeated this giant centipede like they just this like

this story springs up yeah that these stories spring like just from how courageous he is that's so cool because it sounds like he was a he was a really brave like really famous as especially like for medieval like the medieval period like like just to still be like a very famous person it was really impressive just having him step over a dragon like it's no deal now they're like any one of us would have cowered in fear immediately but not hiresato he just stomped right over that thing because he knows no fear he's a fucking badass yep so that's a little more background on him um so as i as i mentioned at the top uh yay theodora

ozaki uh definitely picked picked and chose what parts of what story she liked the most so there are definitely a couple of other versions of this story out there and in one of them i which i think is is kind of interesting uh the the dragon king is actually like a beautiful maiden who asks him for his help defeating the giant centipede so that's one way that the story differs in different, uh, different retellings. There are a bunch of them though. Like this,

this one, this one had a lot of different permutations that I think are really cool. Very nice. Yeah. That was amazing. I love that. I feel like I wasn't, I wasn't talking that much cause it was just so like,

well, what was there to talk about? Cause that's also like, I don't have enough. I have no fixes for that. That's great. Perfect. That's a good story that's fan like that was fantastic no edits um and so i also just want to like shout out to my sister madeline who brought me this book when she came to visit me this summer um i don't know where uh they it up, but it's fantastic.

Thank you so much, Maddie. I love you. You have great taste. All righty. Yeah, that was awesome. What do you got for me? Well, I have in honor of our giveaway this month, I wanted to do a story from A Book of Dragons. Yes.

Oh, it's Dragon Day. We're doing dragon stuff all day. It's the dragon episode. Yes. Oh, it's Dragon Day. We're doing dragon stuff all day. It's the dragon episode. Yes. I am so excited. Hit me. All right. So I picked a kind of a shorter one, but it is called Yanni. Oh, no. Just a name? How am I supposed to make predictions based off just a name? I'm looking through the table of contents. I was trying to see if it said what country of origin Yanni comes from. And I see in here it says, My Lord Bag of Rice. My Lord. Oh, my God.

It's in there too. So there is a Ruth Manning Sanders version. So I'm going to read that after our episode because I'm curious. I will. Just see how it differs. I will also have to read that. That is so cool that it's also in so you'll get you'll get both of the stories that we read today if you win this book

all righty so yeah it's just called yanni and i can't tell what country of origin this one comes from if you happen to know where yanni the country of origin that this story comes from. If you happen to know where Yanni, the country of origin that this story comes from, definitely let us know. Is it spelled Y-I-A-N-N-I? It's Y-A-N-N-I. Y-A-N-N-I. It looks like Yanni might be a Greek name.

Oh, cool. It looks like it's a variant of John. Mm-hmm. You know, maybe it's a Greek story if the character is named Yanni. Well, go ahead and give me three predictions for Yanni. Okay.

I'm going to go off of this being a Greek story purely based on the name. So I'm going to say that this story takes place at the seashore. Can't predict there's a dragon in it because it's the Book of Dragons. But what does the dragon do what does the dragon do um does yanni kill the dragon or help the dragon i'm gonna be hopeful and i think the dragon needs yanni's help for something okay just like in my story you know i feel like that's pretty common in fairy tales if it happens a lot yeah i think i think dragons really only get killed a lot in western european

folktales all right give me one more one more i really want a euro i'm hungry and i'm thinking about greek food i would really like a euro that's what i thought you said but i wasn't sure that does sound good doesn't it yanni ends up a king at the end of the story. Yanni ends up a king at the end of the story. Okay. That's a great prediction. Thank you. It's a great prediction. Okay.

Without further ado, from A Book of Dragons, Yanni. I will tell you a story about Yanni. Yanni was walking along a lonely road to visit his sweetheart. And as he passed by a fountain, a dragon sprang up from behind it. Oh, this is getting, this gets good real fast. Yeah. Yeah. It's a pretty short one. So we're just getting right into it. And the dragon says, good morning. Good morning, my Yanni, my dinner. And Yanni trembled and said, good morning, my dragon, please do not eat me.

But the dragon said, I am hungry, my Yanni, and I am hungry, my dinner. And Yanni says, my dragon, my dragon,

if your dinner, I must be, but let me first say goodbye to my dear little sweetheart. And the dragon says, you shall go on your way to your sweetheart, my Yanni. You shall bid her goodbye forever and ever. If you swear to come back, for I must have my dinner. Oh, my God.

I'm really stoked because this is the first fairy tale dragon where he's actually just straight up wants to eat this guy. That's awesome. I'm glad. I'm glad we finally got there. Classic dragon. Also, I love stories like this where it's like, well, I made a promise. Because I'm imagining that's where this is going. I guess I'll go back and let the dragon eat me because I'm a man of my word.

So Yanni swore up and down that he would come back and he went sadly on his way and came back to the house to his little sweetheart said his little sweetheart why are you sad my yanni my lover do i no longer please you my yanni and they use they use this character's name a lot by the way uh-huh and yanni said oh how greatly you please me my dear little sweetheart But a dragon I met by the fountain has asked me to dinner. Asked me to dinner. Asked me to dinner. Has asked me to, I guess like that's a really nice way to not traumatize your girlfriend. Yeah.

And she is interested in coming with. She says, where you go, Yanni? I will go with you. And Yanni says, where I'm going, no mage shall go with me. And his sweetheart says, I will cook you a dinner, my Yanni, my lover. I will shake up your mattress and spread out your blanket. Which sounds a little suggestive. I definitely think she was planning on getting some.

So the fact that he's ducking out to go have dinner with a dragon is a little upsetting. But Yanni said, where I am going, my dear little sweetheart, no maid shall go with me. There is no cooking, nor eating, nor spreading of mattress, nor sleeping in that place. And his little sweetheart said, Yet I will go with you.

Yanni, my lover, our love will protect us. That's sweet. Oh, it's really sweet. So the two of them set out like two pretty doves that fly into the fowler's net. Oh, is that like Ruth Manning Sanders speak for like two pretty idiots? Oh my gosh, I hope so. Like two pretty fools just going off to be eaten by a dragon. Their love is going to protect them.

Do you think it will? Yes, probably. It's a fairy tale. Well, there was the dragon leading against the fountain, and when the dragon saw them walking towards him, he cried out, My dinner! My dinner! My dinner comes double! And when Yanni heard this, he said, Did I not tell you, my my dear little sweetheart that you should not

have come here but his dear little sweet sweetheart said in a loud voice go on go on my yanni my lover go on and fear not i have eaten nine dragons for breakfast i will now eat the tenth one i love her she is clever af she and hira sato were meant for each other she's taken no she's not by yanni if you hadn't heard we all i'm not you know i'm not gonna go there okay and when the dragon heard this he trembled and said pray tell me friend yanni pray tell me my dinner whose daughter is that one then the dear little sweetheart stepped boldly in front of yanni and said i am the daughter of lightning granddaughter of thunder move aside yanni i will flash with my lightning i will crash with my thunder i I will eat this small dragon. Oh, my God.

And the dragon flew off. He flew off in haste and he never came back to eat up friend Yanni. The end. What? That's the end? I need more. I need more of that. No lie. I was going to predict that there was going to be someone who was the daughter who was like the child of a god. Oh, nice.

Because I was like, it's probably from Greece, which means that like the gods do be fucking. That's how they be. That's how they do be in greece especially so i was like oh there's gonna be a like i was this close to predicting that there was gonna be a demigod but oh my god and there's a cute little picture of the dragon but that is a very cute like that is a very cute little chubby dragon he's got a big pot belly i i think these are all yeah the drawings are all by ram and jock which i don't know what he has against dragons because he never does them he does them dirty that one's kind of cute though because the story

is really cute it is a cute story yeah basically okay i love that yanni 5 000 times in the story but i don't know why it's called yanni yeah he was the least interesting character the daughter of zeus can't get a name what when like yeah well i don't like that and that's the fix for the story. That's like, that's absolutely the fix for the story is change the name. Yeah. Because make it about Yanni. Who cares about Yanni? Do anything in this story.

He goes to his girlfriend. It should have been called Yanni's sweetheart. Yanni's badass demigoddess girlfriend. Mm-hmm. I mean, I don't think she was actually a demigod, but. Well, if you're, I mean. I think she was actually a demigod but well if you're I mean I think she was just trying to scare off the dragon oh you don't think she can actually like call thunder and lightning

no I think she just said that to scare the dragon off which makes me like her even more that's probably true you're probably right I just got so i just got so excited because i was like what like i mean but it doesn't say it doesn't say if she wasn't really like i i do i do like i love that even more though if she's gets the dragon to leave on the pure force of that dragon dead ass believing her yeah i was getting was getting major Dwarf and the Giant vibes. Yeah. Like she was just tricking him. She was just like, I know how to get rid of this dragon. Like, don't worry.

Just because she's also like, I do it all the time. I'll have my 10th dragon for today. Dragons are really pests in this area. Always pop up and they say, I want to eat you. I love her eat you. I love her. Me. She,

she needs a name and the story needs to be named after her because she's the only one that does anything. She was a badass. I love that the dragon actually just wanted to eat someone for once. I thought that was fun. A nice refreshing twist. But also in, and this is what I love so much about dragons and folklore is I love clever dragons that like are clever in the sense that they can talk and,

and that they expect human beings to keep their word that a bar, a bargain, a bargain with a dragon is a, is a promise you have to keep. And he was going to do it. Yeah. He was going to do it. Like Yanni was straight up going to head back to that dragon.

He was like, well, I guess I'm dead. Yanni was going to do it. And the dry. And I love, I love conceited dragons. was like, well, I guess I'm dead. Yanni was going to do it. And I love conceited dragons. I love conceited evil dragons. They are my favorite.

Like Smaug from The Hobbit is my favorite fictional character. He's up there. So good. I love it. I love that so much thank you for that you're welcome and definitely uh make sure yeah read more awesome dragon stories buy a book of dragons or you can go onto our instagram account and at it's at fairy tale fix pod and maybe you can uh enter our giveaway and see if you're one of the lucky winners let's see if you're a lucky winner get our get the dragon book oh that was incredible and i love that both of our stories from today are in it yeah me too i'm so excited to go back through and read that story via ruth banning sanders just to

see like the differences. It's always fun. Or if she told roughly the same version, cause like, cause I don't really know. I don't know enough about like where she sourced her stories, like whether she was getting them directly from informants or whether or not she was getting them elsewhere. Cause she was publishing her fairy tale books in what?

Like the seventies. Yeah. And, and this book of Japanese fairy tales was published in uh 1903 so i'm wondering if maybe ruth manning sanders took yayo zaki's version and adapted it for her collection yeah or if she got a totally different version i'm not sure i don't know i'm stoked yeah definitely uh make sure to check out our show notes to check out these awesome books yeah please do please do the best oh that is so exciting

i'm so happy what a great day me too all right well that is going to do it for fairy tale fix today thank you so much for listening as As always, if you enjoyed the show, please make sure to hit that subscribe button or that follow button. Make sure to leave us a review on Apple or Stitcher or wherever you can leave reviews for podcasts. It really helps people decide if they're going to give us a listen or not.

And if you love the show and want to support us, you can also get extra episodes, merch, books, and other cool bonus content at our patreon you can sign up at fairytalefix.cash and you can also find us on twitter instagram facebook etc at fairytalefixpod and make sure to email us your favorite fairy tales your favorite nursery rhymes and other such things at info at fairytalefixpod.com. And so Hidesato just continued rocking his fabulous life,

going on crazy adventures and rescuing every magical creature in Japan from some terrible fate or other, and just kept on keeping on because he was the best. And Yanni's sweetheart got a story named all after her, her actual name, whatever it was, because she is a fucking badass. And they all lived happily ever after. The end.