Fake Doctors, Real Friends with Zach and Donald - 303: My White Whale

Episode Date: October 6, 2020

On this weeks episode, Dr. Cox's freaks out when Jack gets sick eventually going to all out war with the best pediatrician in the hospital. In the real world, Zach and Donald remember Roscoe, the best dog in the world. Joelle talks about her birthday celebration, and Donald's stunt double remembers the time monkeys came to visit the set. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Bring a little optimism into your life with The Bright Side, a new kind of daily podcast from Hello Sunshine, hosted by me, Danielle Robay, and me, Simone Boyce. Every weekday, we're bringing you conversations about culture, the latest trends, inspiration, and so much more. I am so excited about this podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart. Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast.

Join late night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews interviews and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show, ears edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Martha Stewart and we're back with a new season of my podcast. This season will be even more revealing and more personal with more entrepreneurs, more live events, and more questions from you. I'm talking to my cosmetic dermatologist,

Dr. Dan Belkin, about the secrets behind my skincare. Encore Jane about creating a billion dollar startup. Walter Isaacson about the geniuses who changed the world. Listen and subscribe to the Martha Stewart podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Raquel Willis. Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles, a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words. This season, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states. We will always exist, and we will definitely not let them take away our joy, no matter how hard they try. Listen to Queer Chronicles on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your most fabulous shows. The news is just, I don't even know if we can

go down that road. I mean, the president just tweeted to everybody not to be afraid of COVID anymore. I just don't know how we go down that road and recover and do a comedy show. It's just so upsetting. I just, I'm... I lost my dog,

everybody. That was something that happened Friday. I had this amazing dog for 17 years. We called him Roscoe P. Coltrane. And I was walking down the street 17 years ago on Melrose Boulevard, and a guy was selling a litter of puppies out of a cardboard box. And I was, on my mind, I was thinking about getting a puppy, and I reached down to the box, and I picked this little guy up,

and he fit in the palm of my hand. And I looked at him, and I just said, hello, Roscoe. And I knew that I was never, ever, ever going to put that dog back in that box. Wow. And he was an amazing dog. He was my, he was, you know, I know it's a hackneyed expression, but he was quite literally my best friend. And he got real old. I mean, he was just hanging in there.

And he was having seizures and he was, he had cataracts and he was having a rough time of it. So we took him to the vet, not knowing that it was the day. And the vets these days are really awkward, because you hand the animal off with a mask on and everything, and then the nurses and such, they go inside, and then you wait, and the vet calls you on your phone. And he said to me um i just don't i just need to know what your plan is here because uh we have to think about what's the most fair thing for the animal and uh i knew what he meant and um he didn't have much quality of life left so i've never done this before but i'm sure some of you listeners have but but we did the thing

where you go and you go inside and you say goodbye, and then they inject him with the meds that slowly put him to sleep. It was really, really hard. I mean, I sobbed harder than I have at certain human funerals. It was hard. I hear that. I mean, I'm sure a lot of people listening can relate if you've been through that experience saying goodbye to your buddy. But that was a rough day. I'm sorry, man. I'm so sorry to have rusted you.

Thank you. And also related to scrubs, he spent almost every day on the scrub set running around. Yeah. Amazing. We were allowed to bring our dogs because it was just an abandoned hospital. So particularly the third floor, the dogs must – you've heard us talk about this much to Johnny C's chagrin. The dogs would just run around the whole third floor.

I bet they loved that. What was the name of the dog that Mr. Darcy, Roscoe and Mr. Darcy had a relationship? Yeah, Mr. Darcy was Hillary, right? Yeah. She was the production manager. And the dog would just sit on her desk, a little Pomeranian type thing. Yeah, there were tons of dogs. It was like a dog park.

That was fun. Well, we have this new puppy named Billy, and she's bringing lots of joy into our lives. And adopt a dog if you can because they really bring a lot of joy to your life. Amen. So we are also, we should say, a little programming announcement. We are going to do one a week for a little bit. The good news is I have some things happening with my screenplay that I've talked about on the show, and I kind of got to dive in and do a big draft and work on it. So we warned you. We warned you

when work started getting a little bit real, we were going to go to one a week, but I think we're going to come back. I just need like a couple weeks or so to focus. I know you might think this takes no effort, this podcast, but it does take a little bit of our time, and we do edit them, and we do schedule guests, and we do deal with the merch, and we do have a fucking epic email chain. And so I just need to lighten that load a tiny bit,

but we'll be back with two a week after I put my ass in the chair and do some writing. That being said, so you guys are clear on this. It's not Donald Faison that wants to go to one a week. It is Zach Braff that wants to go

to one a week. I'm not tossing anybody. He's the one that's saying this shit. I just don't want the consequences and the repercussions to come my way because I'm not aing anybody. He's the one that's saying this shit. I just don't want the consequences and the repercussions to come my way. I'm sorry. Because I'm not a part of this. I'm sorry to let anyone down. I know a lot of people count on this podcast.

And we're loving it. This is not a permanent thing. I just need to jam on a project a little bit. I'm sure everyone listening knows what that's like when you've got to put the phone down and turn the internet off and do the work. Put the work in. Put the work in.

Love it. Where it's supposed to be. Did you spin today, Donald? I thought you were going to be my partner in this. You're not. I'm going to send Joelle and Daniel a Peloton bike. Yes. Hold on, Zach. Let's do it. You're not. I'm going to send Joelle and Daniel a Peloton bike. Yes! Hold on, Zach! Let's do it.

You should. Make sure it's Peloton sending it. I would hate for you to be spending money on a Peloton bike for me. No, I might just buy you one because I need some partners in this endeavor. I'm trying to be every damn day. I'm telling you. I mean, I would too. Joelle, we'll do it together. We'll do it together.

Yes! All you gotta do is text me when you're jumping on, and I'll get in that same ride, and we can compete, baby. Let's go. I'm down. I'm always down. Joelle, happy birthday. Oh, thank you. Oh, my God.

That's right. Oh, my God. It was Friday, Thursday. Happy birthday, Joelle. What did you do for Happy birthday, Joelle. What did you do for your birthday, Joelle? My friends picked me up and we went to, they're in my pod. I know you guys have recently come out and be like, this is your pod. I have five friends I hang out with.

So we got into a car and the Haunted Hay Rides is our annual tradition. We go every year. And this year they made the Haunted Hay R hay rides into a drive-in which is really cool Oh wow, so like horror shorts on a big screen and then they have like people dressed in concession stand clothes But they're like mummified and they carry like dead heads around and some of them have like trash can lids And so as you're watching the movie right before the scare comes they'll like come up behind your car and like crash their lids And you're like what the hell is outside of my car? It's very campy and cute, occasionally

scary, because those guys are good at their job. You're like, I can see you, and then they come up around the other side of the car, and you're like, damn it, caught me again. They do the Jurassic Park to you. Clever girl. Clever girl. Love that. Happy birthday, Joelle. Our present will be a bit belated but it's in the works look forward to it yeah it's coming it's coming it's in the works it's in the works um the other

thing i wanted to say is that you the people have asked and we have delivered and on the next episode of this podcast we will have rob machio finally high five todd you guys have asked for it and you guys are gonna get it hey we should talk about the voting thing man yes we should so um this will um this will be airing um when is this air joelle? Tomorrow. Oh, good, good, good, good, good. Perfect. Yes, perfect. Sorry, it sucks for Dan. By the way, it sucks for Dan, and Dan, I'm sorry.

Oh, it's okay. Sometimes because something happens, like my dog dying, we have to push, and then we make Dan put these all together and edit them overnight. Dan, I'm sorry. It's okay. I totally understand. But the good news that this has happened is that we can plug tomorrow. Dun, dun, dun.

So Donald and I promised you folks that if 1,500 of you registered or checked your registration, which you can still do at headcount.org slash Zach and Donald, If 1,500 of you did it, that we would get together and we would make and show you how to make an Appletini. Okay? Well, guess what, y'all? 11,395 of you did it. What? Thunderous applause, Dan.

Did you say 11,000? 11,000. By the way, it's ticking up. By tomorrow when this airs, it might be 12. It's still ticking like crazy. That's incredible. So thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you.

Democracy in action. You love to see it. What's crazy is that you would think that there wouldn't be that many people out there that aren't registered to vote. But apparently, registration... Look, yo, dude, I always thought everybody... You know, if you have an ID, you're registered to vote. You got to go through a process and stuff like that. In other countries, it's that way.

Not here. The people that don't want you to vote make it hard to vote. A lot of people are like, why aren't you automatically registered when you get a jobber's license? That should just be obvious. In other countries, voting day is a holiday. Why is that not true here? Why do we have random other holidays but not election day? Why is it on a Tuesday when everybody's back at work?

Well, I think because the folks who would prefer you not to vote do not want to change things to make it easier for you to vote. Hmm. Hmm. But anyhow, those of you who did it, thank you so much. And we really, really appreciate it. And also, you know, it's still live. So tell your friends to do it and get your family to do it. You're going to get an appletini regardless at this point, right?

You're going to get the prize anyway. So just go out there. If you haven't registered to vote, come register with us, man. It's a safe space. It's quick and easy. And my timeline was filled with people like, you know, Zach, I've been registered for years. I never even thought to check, but because I wanted to support you guys, I did it. I forgot that because I changed my name or, oh my God, there were all these things that were like, you know what, Zach, I moved and I'm embarrassed to say I haven't voted in 14 years,

but I'm going to vote this time. And I checked that I wasn't registered. And I'm just telling you, if you're listening to this and you're going, I'm registered, just go check because A, you'll build our egos with how many people we got to check. Amen. Which we appreciate. And B, you just never know. You just never know.

Truly. Especially in certain states where they're actively kicking people off the rolls. So that's exciting. So put it in your little date book, your iCal, whatever you have. What's iCal called on Android? Cal? Yeah, calendar. Listen, you know where What's iCal called on Android? Cal? Yeah, calendar. Listen, you know where to find your calendars on your phones, okay?

I know. We're all doing the same stuff. And a notification. Whatever your weird calendar is, write it down. Tomorrow at 6 p.m. LA time. Now, I had a lot of people who listen in Europe already write me like, that's the middle of the night. Well, understandably, this was a United States challenge

and Donald and I would prefer to wait till the end of the day to start drinking martinis. And people in Europe, you didn't have to participate in the challenge in the first place, so you're getting a free appletini courtesy of the guys from

Scrubs. That's true. Wow! And we're gonna leaveubs. That's true. Wow. And we're going to leave it. That having been said, we're going to do it live. We'll do it live. We're going to do it live. And then we'll leave it in our feed or our story, whatever the kids do. And so you'll be able to watch it. Hopefully everything goes smoothly.

I want you all to know. We're going to go live, Donald. So you need to be. Daniel's not going to edit out anything we do embarrassing. So you got to hold it together. Let me ask you a question. These are questions that I need answered. Yes.

Can I be stoned? Well, everyone expects that you'll be stoned. Yeah, that's fine. I don't think you should smoke weed on the live feed. Probably not on the feed, yeah. You're not like, you're not, you know, we're not rappers. Beforehand.

Let me write that down. Don't. On the live feed. What other questions do you have? Cool. Clothes are optional. Oh, I'm sure everyone would love it if you were topless. That would be great. So I can go topless? Yeah. I think everyone would love to see those were topless um that would be great so i can go topless yeah

i think everyone would love to see those melted hershey's kisses okay topless and high topless wow is fine yeah topless is fine i will be wearing my shirt oh yeah oh i have a voting is sexy shirt that i'm gonna be wearing i saved. I saved it for this so you guys can see it. Nice. Zach, you know what's sexy? What? Voting. Yeah.

Wait till you see this shirt. You're all going to want it. It's hot. Hot as balls. Love it. We've wasted enough time. Five, six, seven, eight. I don't like to say this very often, and you know I don't, because sometimes y'all might think I'm blowing these episodes up too much.

What are you talking about? Every once in a while, I say something that is honest to the people, because I want these people who are listening to know that I care about them, and I never lie to you. Not a great episode. Okay. I'm glad you said something about that you know what i wrote look at the last thing i wrote on my notes you disagree no i i agree with you actually actually. I think this episode has great story lines and story arcs in it.

But overall, I didn't... You know what I think I've missed? I missed Aloma, and I miss Robert, and I miss Maschio. Neither one of them are in this episode. And because of that, I don't think I... I didn't laugh. And no Sam Lloyd either. So no big laughs for me.

Yeah, I didn't really laugh that much. You know what I laughed at was your hair in the flashbacks, because you always have a high top fade and I have a mullet, but this one was extra high. Did you realize that? This was like kid and play. Was it kid and play?

Yeah, it looked like the wig grew after they took it off of me. Like they put some type of miracle grow in that shit and they put it on the head mannequin. There's a shot of you there's a single shot of you with that wig on and it's the hardest

funniest laugh I had in the whole episode just because this is a sight gag. It must be an 8 inch, 10 inch high top fade. It's the hardest, funniest laugh I had in the whole episode just because it's just a side gag. It must be an 8-inch, 10-inch high-top fade. It's amazing. It's a pretty high-top fade. I will say this, though. I will say this. One, holy shit.

I mean, we should get into the recap first, but who the fuck eats breakfast at SeaWorld like it's a normal thing? That was... I know. Come on, buddy. I know. That is amazing. Imagine eating... No, that is a real... I mean,

we're not plugging SeaWorld, but that is a thing that you used to be able to do there, was you could go at the restaurant, and then whales would swim by. What? Yeah. Yeah. Swim by crying, looking for their babies. Splash your eggs.

Too dark? No, fuck SeaWorld. I don't care. Fuck SeaWorld. Splash your eggs. Too dark? No, fuck SeaWorld. I don't care. Fuck SeaWorld. SeaWorld's gonna take a hit out on me, but I don't care. Fuck SeaWorld. I'm gonna have people in wetsuits climb over my fence and kill me. That's something like out of Scarface, dude. I know.

What's it gonna be like? I'm gonna be in my fucking house with my I don't have a Scarface gun but I probably shouldn't tell the C-World people that I do have a Scarface gun alright alright get into your recap you ready

yeah hold on I gotta time you is it even worth timing anymore? We know it's gonna be whatever the hell you want it to be. There's no need to time this one. It's gonna be a quick and short one. Okay, I'm glad to know you put in the effort. Here we go, and go. Dr. Cox learned some things can't be fixed with privilege.

JD's given advice from an unlikely source, but JD's unwillingness to receive said advice doesn't help him and hurts his interns. Pride gets the best of us. Thank goodness no one's immune to humility. That was 20 seconds.

Ding, ding. That was 20 seconds. Thank God no one is immune to humility. Everybody can be humbled is what you're saying. Yeah, that's exactly what I'm saying. Not everyone, Donald. Not everyone. Let's not go there. Let's not go Not everyone Let's not go there Sorry, America

So Chris Maloney's in the episode And he's a funny guy I was watching this and going God, I bet Johnny C and Chris Maloney Fucking hated each other Because they're just too similar And too alpharis is a lovely guy don't get me wrong but i was just thinking of the two alphas the two basically the characters

they're playing in the episode i just pictured so i texted johnny and i go you fucking hated maloney didn't you he laughed and he goes no no no we're old friends um but there was just something about watching the episode i guess their acting was amazing but I was like these fuckers must have really hated each other no they're just so similar in their alpha maleness it's very interesting that Johnny hangs out

with a lot of people that are exactly well not exactly but are very much like him if you look at his group of guys that he hangs out with, they're all uber alpha. They're all, you know what I mean? They're all.

They love sports. They love sports, and they're all very eccentric actors. You know what I mean? They have little quirks about them that nobody else does. You know what I mean? Oh, my God. By the way, we sold out of beach towels. We sold out of washcloths.

What the fuck? That's great. We sold out of water cloths. What? That's great. We sold out of everything. We still don't have any mugs available for you guys out there. Why are we ordering more stuff? Because whenever we release something, everyone gets excited, and then it sells right out. We need to order more. You guys are doing much better.

We were like, oh, they're going to do really good. We'll order a lot. And then you do so much better. And so you're setting a new standard. We're going to do really good. We'll order a lot. And then you do so much better. And so you're setting a new standard. We're just trying to keep up. They told me, the merch gal, Harper, told me that there's over 200 people on a waiting list for beach towels. There were a lot of disappointed people. That's how much people want to lie on our faces.

This is the streetwear method. This is how Supreme does it. Oh, we're doing the Supreme way. There'll be people lined up oh shit this is how you do it now if you live in la and before covid if you live in la and you drive down fairfax you will see a line like you can't believe how long the line is and i'm just i'm always like what who's doing a signing is it like fucking jay-z what are people lined up for and it's fucking the supreme store every day so donald we're trying to get that supreme action that's why our that's

why our shit's sold out well yo we yo i'm just saying man maybe we should do a little thing with supreme maybe we should get like that a supreme like a stamp and just stamp supreme on the back of our shirt okay people pay on wait People pay our honor. Wait, hold on now. Dan, you know I'm right, man. They're going to get real frisky with that, then. Dan, you know I'm right about this. People pay our honor and life for that Supreme shit. Oh, they absolutely do.

It don't even got to be real Supreme. All they got to do is say Supreme on it. Hey, listen, if you bought the washcloth and our faces are dotted all over it like a checkerboard and you have the choice when going into your anus to get any dookie out of the shower. Use Zach's. Use Donald's face.

Use Zach's. Use Donald's face. Use Zach's face. Okay? Do not put your finger behind my face. Choose Donald's face. And scrub your balloon knot better than you've ever scrubbed. Listen, when you are getting into your balloon knot,

I want you to choose that beautiful dome, Donald. I think I need to go pray. I need to clean myself. You should use make sure you use that towel. I don't even have one. I don't have one either.

Can you get us some of this stuff? I'm still trying to get a hoodie. I'm just trying to get one hoodie, not a cup. I didn't have one either. Can you get us some of this stuff? I didn't. I'm just trying to get one hoodie, not a cup. I didn't realize that this was going to be an issue until I was promoting our towels, saying that they were up live. And I realized, oh, shit, people could wash their asses or their wops. That's the whole point. With our faces. Yeah, get it on your wop, everybody. Precisely, friends.

Precisely. My face is going to touch so much wop. Yeah. And it really will be wop because it's in the shower, so we know it's wopped up. I'm going to dry a whole lot of wop. Yeah, you are. You're going to

wash wop and you're going to wash balloon knots all over the world. I'm going to wash wop, I'm going to wash balloon knots, I'm going to dry a whole lot of WAP. Yeah, you are. You're going to wash WAP, and you're going to wash balloon knots all over the world. I'm going to wash WAP. I'm going to wash balloon knots. I'm going to wash junk, and I'm going to dry all of them at the same time. Armpits? You're going to get in all sorts of armpits and coin slots? Oh, my God. You know I love me an armpit.

I love me a coin slot. And there we go. By the way, you can use me on your coin slot. Use Donald on your balloon. This is the best episode of this show ever. Wait, this might be the best advertiser. Look, it's our stuff, so we can advertise it however we want it. We don't have any guidelines.

This is what I want you to do. Ladies and gentlemen of Fake Doctors and Real Friends. Fake Doctors and Real Friends. This is what I want you to do. Ladies and gentlemen of fake doctors and real friends, fake doctors, real friends, if you're out there and you have purchased said washcloth or towel, I give you permission.

You don't even need my permission, but I give you permission to wipe your asshole with my face. This is the best red ad we've ever done. If only our ads that we have to read sounded this good. GT's Kombucha is begging for this energy. Yes, GT's Kombucha is going to be like, can you give us that kind of energy? That's amazing. Let's take a break.

We'll be right back after these fine words. Bring a little optimism into your life with The Bright Side, a new kind of daily podcast from Hello Sunshine. Hosted by me, Danielle Robay, and me, Simone Boyce. Every weekday, we're bringing you conversations about culture, the latest trends, inspiration, and so much more. I am so excited about this podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart. Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side.

Imagine you ask two people the same exact set of seven questions. I'm Minnie Driver, and this was the idea I set out to explore in my podcast, Minnie Questions. This year, we bring a whole new group of guests to answer the same seven questions, including actress and star of the mega hit sitcom Friends, Courtney Cox. You can't go around it, so you just go through it. This is a roadblock. It's going to catch you down the road. Go through it. Deal with it. Comedian, writer, and star of the series Catastrophe, Rob Delaney. I shouldn't feel guilty about my son's death. He died of a brain tumor. It's part of what happens when your kid dies.

Intellectually, you'll understand that it's not your fault, but you'll still feel guilty. Alt-rock icon, Liz Phair. That personal disaster wrote Guyville. So everything comes out of a dead end. And many, many more. Join me on season three of Many Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. Professional dancer Cheryl Burke has been part of Dancing with the Stars since the very beginning. 26 seasons of the Samba, the Rumba, and the Cha-Cha. 24 partners, six finals, and two mirrorball trophies. She knows all the secrets, the behind the scenes arguments and the affairs, the flings, the flirting and the fighting. It's time to tell it all on her new podcast,

Sex, Lies and Spray Tans. We'll take you all the way back to season one and up through today for the dance floor drama like you wouldn't believe. Former partners, co-stars, friends, and frenemies will join Cheryl each week. Listen to Sex, Lies, and Spray Tans on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. It's Chelsea Handler, and if you listen to my podcast,

Dear Chelsea, you know that I love making space for women to share their stories. And that is why I'm excited to be part of Women Take the Mic, iHeartRadio's celebration of women who make music, influence, change, and create culture. All month long, your favorite voices from talk radio, music, and podcasting will highlight the remarkable achievements made by women and discuss the most significant issues facing us today. Search Women Take the Mic to listen to a collection of International Women's Day episodes

from iHeart's top podcasts, including Angela Yee's Lip Service, The Psychology of Your Twenties, and Dear Chelsea. It is a great way to support women and discover your new favorite show. Listen to Women Take the Mic on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Let's get focused, all right?

So, Chris Maloney is in the episode. That's such a great... Maloney's in the episode. We tried to get Chris, by the way, but he is shooting his show, which I think is... He works so much. Is he still on SVU? I think he's coming back to SVU.

I think he's coming back. Imagine how rich Chris Maloney must be from that SVU money. It's like season 45. Well, think about Mariska, man. I know. I've been to Mariska's house. It's insane.

I got to tell you. But I'm going to tell you something right now. That SVU money, Donald. We never did make that SVU money, Donald. No, we did not. But when you think about it, they have to give up every other aspect of their career just to do that show. Yeah, they went all in. It's like poker.

They're all in. All in. Here you go. I'm not going to ever do movies. I can't do movies because of this. I can't do- Well, he does movies. He does indies and stuff.

I mean, I've seen Chris Ross around. He had to leave SVU to do that, though. He had to leave the show to go do other things. I'm just telling you, when your show is on like season 100, it's just like Ellen Pompeo on Grey's Anatomy. I mean, how many seasons has that been on? Ellen Pompeo. She must have gold faucets.

I'm sorry, gold faucets. Ellen Pompeo takes a jet to Walmart. Listen, man. We never did get that Grey's Anatomy money. I know, but I didn't really want to. I mean, I don't want to work as hard as we did for my whole life, to be honest. I mean, those hours are just too much for Daddy. I want to work hard.

No, I totally get it. I totally... I also want to have a little bit of a life, you know what I'm saying? I'm sure they have... True that. I'm sure they have... Look, first of all, Grey's Anatomy can't run forever. It'll run for a long time, but it can't run forever.

I think it could run forever. Why does it even... My niece, the teenagers have found it, Donald. My niece has Grey's Anatomy sheets. 17 years strong. Once she says, I don't want to do this anymore, it's over because she's Grey, isn't she? They're always did now. She's had two sisters.

One of them died in a plane crash, but the other one is still hanging around. She could definitely kick in and run that. She's got kids. If they want to do a quick little time jump her kids could be the greys of greys anatomy oh my god time jump no we don't need to ever graze that to be enters the marvel universe yes let's do it that's amazing wait you know if i i is there a show other than saturday night live and i mean even the tonight show changed time slots and and who's hosted it and everything like that.

It's become a completely different show other than Saturday Night Live. Is there is there anything for 60 minutes? Is there any like Dr. Well, there are any. No. What's the what's the narrative? Joelle, just look up for us. What's the non non news?

Not not SNL. What's the right? What's the narrative? Longest, not SNL. What's the narrative longest running show? Yeah. United States? Because globally it's Doctor Who. Yeah. USA.

How long is Doctor Who? It's got to be those kids over on that Supernatural show, right? Yeah, that just ended this year. I've never seen an episode of Doctor Who. I'm sorry. Neither have I. Sorry, BBC. I'm sorry. Uh-oh. Have you watched it, Dan? The fans are coming for you. Yeah, I've seen seen an episode of Doctor Who. I'm sorry. Neither have I. Sorry, BBC. I'm sorry.

Uh-oh. Have you watched it, Dan? The fans are coming for you. Yeah, I've seen some episodes. I wouldn't call myself a huge fan, but I've definitely seen enough. Had some Who fans in college who were like, oh, you gotta watch. And I was like, okay, let's do it. So here we go.

The Simpsons, 32 seasons. Law and Order, 21 seasons. Gunsmoke, 20. So it's The Simpsons. Law and Order is 21., Gunsmoke, 20. So it's The Simpsons. Law and Order is 21. Wow, okay. I don't know. I couldn't do a television show for 21 years, but

that's... The same character every day. But isn't that fuck you money, though? Yeah, but I mean... Yeah, but I mean, I think one also has to go, as we did, or at least, obviously, from my point of view, I want to try other things. I'm so grateful, but I also want to try other things.

I'm not judging. It's each their own. I don't have gold faucets. No, no. Nobody's judging anybody. I just think that if I had that opportunity, I don't know that I would be like, nah, let's say peace out to it.

They're certain. But then again, I didn't work every day on scrubs. Like if scrubs could still run right now, I might still be into that. But then again, I didn't work every day. I only worked a few days out of the week, and I would have days off, and I was able to have a life during the day. Whereas you worked

every day, damn near every hour. So I could totally understand how easy it is to get burnt out when you're living that type of lifestyle. Alright, let's get back to the episode, Donald. Mickhead! First introduction of Mickhead, finally. Yes, finally. The very first time we introduced the character of Dr. Mick Head.

He gets tackled and knocked out of the picture. So, Frank, this is your moment. We should have had you on the show. Sorry. Well, no, we can have Mick Head on. I think we should do a special episode one day where we discuss. We have all those guys on. That'd be great.

The mick heads of the world, the beard fusses. The mick heads. You know, at this point I had made Garden State and had a big scene where it said balls on my face, on my forehead in Garden State. And I don't. And then, you know, here I am. I'm not saying that it was taken from that, but I had just shot a very special moment of my movie where while I was drunk and asleep, someone wrote balls on my forehead.

And now here we are, episode 303, we're writing prom on my forehead. Bizarre. What are you trying to say? I'm not trying to say anything. Are you sure about it? Are you sure about it? Because it seems like you're trying to compare balls

and prom. No, I don't think that anyone from the Scrubs writer room would have seen an early cut of Garden State. I'm just saying it's a bizarre coincidence. It does say prom in my head. And when we come back, I say to the janitors trying to get the marker off the wall, and I say, you'll be able to get off.

You won't need laser surgery or skin from your ass. That did make me laugh. It's your dad's space pen. Which means that JD, in order to get prom off his forehead, needed to have skin transferred from his ass. Yeah, they did a screen graph on his ass they did a skin graph on his ass and lasered the markers the marker was so strong that they had to get it monkeys donald we have monkeys on the set so zach this is the part that dionte wanted to

tell us about where something happened with him and some monkeys uh Deontay take it away the doctor is turning into monkeys fantasy scene oh yeah I remember this one real well so the night before the scene Donald, Zach, and I went out and I got super drunk and I was really hungover uh the next day. So when I get to set, we're having like a big safety meeting because these chimpanzees are going to be on set and the trainers are telling us how dangerous they are and that they're super strong and they can rip your arm out of your socket

or another story was about a lady who got her face eaten off and basically we got to be super careful and not only careful, anyone who's not needed on set after we set this up who got her face eaten off. And basically, we got to be super careful. And not only careful, anyone who's not needed on set after we set this up has to leave the floor. Like, not just the set, but get off of the fourth floor where we were filming everyone, if you're not needed. So I was like, you know what?

If everyone's leaving the floor, then the couch in the doctor's lounge on the fourth floor, and you guys watch the show, you know it's the one that has the Pac-Man machine, the couch is going to be open, right? So I can close the doors and take a nap. Cool, right? Not cool. Not cool. So I'm there sleeping, and all of a sudden I'm awakened by the sounds of monkeys screaming and trainers screaming I don't know what the monkeys were screaming but the trainers were screaming get back here get back here and I was like get back where next thing I know I could hear the monkeys running down the hallways towards me and I'm thinking okay I should be cool right like like both doors are

closed and I'm inside but then I remember wait a minute monkeys can open doors they got thumbs so as I set up to go run over to lock the door the door just burst open and there's a monkey standing there with a lab coat on and a stethoscope, and he's got his teeth showing, and he's looking me dead in my eye, and all I could think about is, oh God, I'm about to lose my face. Next thing I know, the monkey starts sprinting at me, full speed, full speed across the room, right at me, and at the very last second, he jumps over me, over the couch, to the back of the room, opens the back door, and runs out. That is the last time I don't listen to safety protocols. Just saying. Thank you, Deontay.

Thank you, Deontay. Yeah, well, monkeys on set. What a bizarre, that was a bizarre day. I remember that. How about when the janitor sprays his chemicals on Doug's ear and Doug starts screaming down the hallway? Now, then I fantasize about seeing Elliot in a bikini sucking on a lollipop in a rowboat. Now, this is a very provocative Sarah Chalk moment because she's, you know. Really hot. It's J.D.'s fantasy, but, you know, she went full lollipop. Wait, what does full lollipop mean? She was filleting the lollipop in a seductive manner whilst in a bikini that was cleavage heavy.

In a rowboat. In a rowboat. And then we cut to Scott Foley, and he's duct taped with his mouth all taped up in the bottom of the boat, and we throw him over the side. That was funny. Yeah. Did somebody have to really fall in that?

Do you remember shooting that day? Vaguely, I remember. I don't remember where it was. I think it looks like Lake Balboa. I be wrong probably it was probably that and then yes a stuntman went in not foley i don't know if foley was was was even there that day they may have shot him in the boat a different time all i know is that would have looked gross as fuck even even when she even when they cut to sarah on her back with the lollipop in her mouth and the boat's going from underneath the camera into the background, I remember looking at it and being like, oh, wow, cool shot. That water looks dirty as fuck, though.

By the way, if it was Lake Balboa, there's probably fucking floating hypodermic needles in it. There's a stuntman earning his keep. Go into that water. The stunt wasn't falling out of the boat the stunt was getting in that fucking water ugh that leg like the water's green

when he lands in it and it splashes it doesn't it doesn't get white it just stays green dude while the water just gross gross how about when I go I think I'm going on a It doesn't get white. It just stays green, dude, while the water. Just gross.

Gross. How about when I go, I think I'm going to dinner with Elliot, and Sean shows up. I go, oh, hey, Sean's here, everybody. Hey, Sean. Hey. You know what else made me laugh? When he goes, well, actually, JD, they are mammals. Well, you know what, Sean? You know what? No when he goes, well, actually, J.D., they are mammals. Well, you know what, Sean?

You know what? No, he goes, unfortunately for me, Sean, my interns aren't mammals. And he goes, Scott with the most perfect straight man. Actually, J.D., they are. I don't care, Sean. But when you go, well, you know what, Sean? Unfortunately, that shit was so hilarious. I love.

I laugh so hard. I do laugh hard at me being manic and him just totally being straight. Like, actually, JD, they are mammals. Amazing. That was funny. How about in that flashback where just showing what a pushover jd is and the guy comes in he goes who wants to help me move and i go i will no and then he comes back and he goes who wants to help me move back and i go well i know where it all goes

that was funny i've never noticed that that JD wants everybody to like him. I've noticed that he, you know, likes who he likes, et cetera, et cetera. But I've never noticed that he's gone all out to make people like him. I always thought that JD was one of those cats. Well, if he doesn't want to fuck with me, then I don't got to fuck with him. No, I think he was definitely someone that was super sensitive and wanted everyone to like him. In fact, in this episode, he wants his interns to like him so much that they're shit. They don't respect him.

They're walking all over him. And one of his interns hands him a file and is like, here, can you take care of this? And I'm like, wow, you have a lot of other work to do. He's there doing all of the stuff for for his interns. Like he none of them know how to all of them are incompetent because of him. Yeah. Yeah. He's not being a good teacher. I mean, that's the lesson. It's so hard in life when you're trying to walk that line between wanting people to like you and also having their respect.

Yeah. I'm dealing with that. JD is someone who's just getting walked all over and he doesn't know how to stop it because he doesn't want confrontation. Sometimes you have to suck it up and have confrontation or you're just going to have no respect. Yeah, I'm dealing with that in my house right now, man, with my kids. Really? My kids walk all over me. Who ones are the young ones the young ones and i'm walking the thin line of having to be you know i want to be their friend but i also got to be

their dad you know what i mean and so casey comes in and freaking lays down the you know she lays down the gauntlet and they all hop to it and everything like that and she looks at me like dude what the fuck and in my mind i'm, I just don't want them to hate me. But yeah, you're right. You just, you gotta, you have to be responsible and you have to make sure that they're responsible. And so this is the exact same thing. It's the exact same thing.

And I imagine it's so hard as a parent because you're like, I don't want to fucking have a confrontation right now. I just sat down to eat my soup. Or, you know, I wake up earlier than everybody in the morning and stuff like that, and the kids come down and, you know, it's

quiet in the house, and Rocco comes down and he'll want breakfast, and if I don't make him what he wants without reading, you know, it's the mind reading of what children want for breakfast. Like, on TV, you say, you know, the breakfast time comes and the parent just makes breakfast and the kid eats the shit.

In real life, parent makes breakfast, the kid's like, I didn't want that for breakfast. And you're like, oh, shit, well, what do you want? And then now all of a sudden you're catering to the kid. And, you know, Casey comes down and be like, you're eating this shit. And they'll eat it. And I'm like, why can't I do that? You are the worst advertisement for having children.

Every time I hang out with Donald, he's like, bro, save yourself. I love my kids. Casey and Donald and Florence and I had dinner. And they were like, no, seriously, don't do it. No, we weren't like that. And we're both like, ha, seriously, don't do it. And we weren't like, we're both like, and we're both like, ha ha ha ha ha. And they're like,

no run. We weren't like that, dude. We were more, it was more like, if you're going to do it, just make sure you're ready to do it. Because if you're not ready to do it,

this shit, it's a lot of work and it's only fulfilling. If you're truthfully in it to win it. if you're truthfully in it to win it and we are truthfully in it to win it and so yes it's very difficult and yes we have hard times and stuff like that but we know we're trying to raise great human beings and that's our effort and so at the end of the day i would love the audience to see like like, subtitles while Donald's talking right now. It's like, run while you still can. Ignore the words that are coming out of my mouth. These motherfuckers will not eat cereal for breakfast.

Somebody takes a picture of me, and then my eyes kind of go blank for a second, and then I come to, and I look at you, and I'm like, run! Run! And then out of nowhere, my kids snatch me up and shit and pull me away. And it's just like, get out. Get out! Get out! Get out!

All right. On that note, we are going to go to break. And when we come back, we're going to have a fan call. We'll be right back. Bring a little optimism into your life with The Bright Side, a new kind of daily podcast from Hello Sunshine. Hosted by me, Danielle Robay. And me, Simone Boyce.

Every weekday, we're bringing you conversations about culture, the latest trends, inspiration, and so much more. I am so excited about this podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share listen to the bright side on america's number one podcast network iheart open your free iheart app and search the bright side imagine you ask two people the same exact set of seven questions i'm mini driver and this was the idea i set out to explore in my podcast mini Mini Questions. This year, we bring a whole new group of guests to answer the same seven questions, including actress and star of the mega hit sitcom Friends,

Courtney Cox. You can't go around it, so you just go through it. This is a roadblock. It's going to catch you down the road. Go through it. Deal with it. Comedian, writer, and star of the series Catastrophe, Rob Delaney. I shouldn't feel guilty about my son's death. He died of a brain tumor. It's part of what happens when your kid dies. Intellectually, you'll understand that it's not your fault, but you'll still feel guilty. Alt-rock icon, Liz Phair. That personal disaster wrote Guyville. So everything comes out of a dead end. And many, many more. Join me on season three of mini questions

on the iHeartRadio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your favorite podcasts seven questions limitless answers professional dancer Cheryl Burke has been part of dancing with the stars since the very beginning 26 seasons of the s, the rumba and the cha-cha. 24 partners, 6 finals and 2 mirrorball trophies. She knows all the secrets, the behind the scenes arguments and the affairs, the flings, the flirting and the fighting. It's time to tell it all on her new podcast Sex, Lies and Spray Tans We'll take you all the way back to season one And up through today

For the dance floor drama like you wouldn't believe Former partners, co-stars, friends and frenemies Will join Cheryl each week Listen to Sex, Lies and Spray Tans On the iHeartRadio app Apple Podcasts Or wherever you get your podcasts It's Chelsea Handler And if you listen to my podcast Dear Chelsea iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

It's Chelsea Handler, and if you listen to my podcast, Dear Chelsea, you know that I love making space for women to share their stories. And that is why I'm excited to be part of Women Take the Mic, iHeartRadio's celebration of women who make music, influence change, and create culture. All month long, your favorite voices from talk radio, music, and podcasting will highlight the remarkable achievements made by women and discuss the most significant issues facing us today. Search Women Take the Mic to listen to a collection of International Women's Day episodes from iHeart's top podcasts, including Angela Yee's Lip Service, The Psychology of Your 20s, and Dear Chelsea.

It is a great way to support women and discover your new favorite show. Listen to women. Take the mic on the I heart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back. I have, I have AC problems.

Hello there. How are you, Hollyhock? Hi. Hollyhock, that can't be your real name. You just like BoJack Horseman. That is my real name. Is it really? I'm married into that name.

Isn't that great? Oh, that's pretty awesome. Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Hollyhock! Welcome to the program, Hollyhock. Oh my God, I've been waiting for that. Where are you calling from? I'm calling from just outside of Baltimore. Hey. Baltimore, Maryland in the heart.

Yeah. There is your official Donald in the Oprah voice saying your location. I've been waiting for it. Yeah. Ever since I found out I was going to be on the show. I've been waiting for it ever since she heard she was going to be on the show. Donald, you're going to break the latch. Stop.

You're breaking the latch. Breaking the latch. You're breaking many, many a baby's areola latch right now when you yell. We know that from the breastfeeding conversation. Okay? Now we have to whisper to get the baby back to sleep. I apologize. Okay.

Let it latch. Let it latch. There it is. Oh, my God. It got a little dirty. It got a little dirty. Oh, it's trying to be dirty with it. A little dirty, a little dirty.

All right, Holly, hi. Welcome. How are you? Hi. What do you do for a living over in Baltimore, Maryland? Pause, Holly. Pause. Stop right there.

Hold on. Okay. Okay, Joelle is interrupting. Oh, God. Interrupting Joelle. You guys, look at this. Stop right there. Hold on. Okay. Joelle is interrupting. Interrupting Joelle. You guys, look at this. Oh my god. Can you describe what we're looking at? Oh my god.

So this is a cake that I made. You made that cake? You're a baker? Let me tell the audience. Guys, we are looking at a realistic, actual-sized cake of Baby Yoda. Wow. I mean, it looks like it could be one of those giant figures that Sideshow Collectibles makes, but it is, in fact, an edible cake.

Tell us about this, Holly. So, tell us about Baby Yoda or cake cake making you made that yes yes stop stop focus on holly come on how did you learn how did you learn to do that that oh my god there's now there's a bb8 one so i actually taught myself like i started it. I wanted to make my son's first birthday cake and he just turned 13. So I wanted to get into it. I was watching all the TV shows about cake decorating and I was just like, yes, I'm going to do this. And so that's when I started. My very first cake is my son's first birthday cake.

Do you have a business that you do this or is this just for fun? I do. Actually, my husband and I have an events company. And obviously, in March, that went out the window for the foreseeable future because we do small events, we do concerts and nerd parties and things that we have like a lot of people at joelle would love a nerd party that's her dream oh my gosh the potter party the potter parties are so much fun you just don't even know there's like a million wizards and witches so anyway so we that just went out the window um and uh we needed to do something to make money we weren't sure if if unemployment was going to come in or if we, you know, at that time we didn't even know that there was a stimulus coming or

anything like that. So I was just like, all right, this is what I can do. So this is what I'm going to do. And I came up with a menu. My husband is a graphic designer and, um, media marketer. So he put all of that together for me and we launched and like sold out for the first like month that we did. Oh, that's amazing. So wait, tell people, you got to tell people how they could get one of your amazing cakes. You have a website, I assume, or something?

So yeah, so we're on Facebook and Instagram. We're the Sugar Drop. Hold on. I'm trying to like open up this new pack of stickers I have to show you guys. I love stickers. Please send us stickers. Oh, I'll definitely send you some. I want to get one.

All right. So, okay. This is the Sugar Drop Maryland. So it's the Sugar Drop MD on Facebook and Instagram. The Sugar Drop MD. Now, if you're in the Maryland, if you're in the Baltimore area, I assume. Yeah. Yeah. In the Baltimore area, we do delivery. So it's like contactless delivery of all of your sugary needs. So we, um, how long does like that? How long does like a baby

Yoda cake like that, which is just magnificent by the way. And even if you're not in the Baltimore area, you should go look at her Instagram and see how awesome this is how long does something like that take to make uh I'm not exactly sure because I do it in steps like I'll bake the cake one day and then I'll I sit and stack it and carve it out another day and then add the details another day but it's all kind of broken up into different chunks and it could be sometimes 10 hours that it takes me to make something like that or sometimes it could take all week. It just depends on, you know, it just depends on what it is that I'm doing.

As your business grows, and I imagine it will, you'll probably need to hire some helpers to be able to crank out things like that. I know, I know. For right now, it's just me and my husband is my delivery boy and my graphic designer. Now, could you do anything? Like if I wanted a Joelle cake, could you take images of Joelle and fashion a Joelle cake for her birthday?

You know, I do believe I could. Okay. I have done like a bust of Deadpool and Voldemort and, you know, some things that are like required facial features. So I probably could. Okay. Joelle, I'm going to return your present. Joelle cake. I love it. I love it. I would like a salted caramel. Let's do this.

Donald, what would you have made if you could commission? I mean, it might be baby Yoda, but what would you commission as a cake? Wow, that's a tough one. It's definitely going to be something Star Wars. Probably Darth Vader. So I have a seven-year-old and a five-year-old. And so we just recently got into the whole, you know, me personally, again, the whole cake once a year, the special big ass cake for the birthday.

My kid had a garbage truck for his second birthday, like a garbage truck cake. I was there. Love that. That's awesome. It was huge. The crazy thing is you look at these things and you're like, there's no way that could taste good.

And then you bite into it and it's delicious. It's like eating a twinkie or uh yeah you know what i mean it's it's just really interesting uh i've always shied away from cakes that looked like they took a lot of work to make because i've always felt like you know it's it'll be it'll be old or the frosting will be too, it'll be worked too much. And in all honesty, the cakes are delicious, man. You don't lose, you don't lose flavor and texture because of the sculpture.

So I love it. I was watching one of those cake shows and they were like building like a Wallace and Gromit moving. It was like a pie making machine and it had moving parts. And I always think that's funny. Like, well, what happens when you like cut your knife down and you hit like plywood?

Like, right. There obviously is. I mean, not, I'm not saying in yours, but in these big elaborate ones, there's like obviously structure and like wiring.

There, there is some structure involved. Like baby Yoda had a few dowel rods inside of him to like sort of keep him upright um for transport but i always let my customers know like this is what's in it so just so you know when you're cutting into it so that you don't yeah all right so i didn't even know in the in the fancy cake building world you do have to put some wood dowels or something to say like it's like the thing that used to be in the sandwiches the toothpick yeah yeah some sometimes um it requires like an armature like it could be pvc pipe inside

of that thing it just depends on what it is like you just have to build um build the cakes out you know i did a um what is it called well i'm having a blank anyway, I made this big tree one time. Yeah. And so I had like PVC pipe and plywood cut out to the shape and like build up all over it. So you just got to make sure to tell your customers where not to cut. Right. I try to make as much as possible edible on my cakes so that it's really not just for, for looks, but it is for taste. Well, and that's really impressive. And also, I just admire you for during this hard time sort of pivoting your business and going, how do we operate now in this current world?

And I think that's really impressive that you've been successful at it. I really appreciate that. It's definitely been crazy, but we have a really supportive family of the people that already supported our previous business that have now jumped on board and will order things for me on a regular basis and just kind of keep us going because we are a family here. And we couldn't do it without their support. So I have a question. When COVID's over, are you going to go back into event planning and stuff like that again? back into event planning and stuff like that again? So I think that we're going to sort of do,

um, I'll probably do less just because I do rely on my husband so much for, um, his help in, in my business. And, uh, and he relies on me for helping his business. So I think that what we'll do is just kind of dial back and do an even balance, um, between the two so that we can keep doing the things that we're super passionate about together. I just think there's something special about not only throwing the party, but you don't have to go someplace else to get the cake. What is the cake that you want?

And then we go, you know what I mean? What's the theme of the party? We're going to theme the cake that way too. Yeah, yeah. That BB-8 actually went to, we had a Star Wars party for our events company. And occasionally, and the Voldemort one I made too, we occasionally just like, I'll throw together a cake to go with the theme of the party that we're having. What happens at a Star Wars party?

I'm sure at least two of these people want to know what goes down at a Star Wars party. I would love to know what happens at a Star Wars party. So our nerd parties, we generally do a trivia session. So we had a Star Wars themed trivia. We have a drink menu that's catered to Star Wars. And we have costume contests and things like that and karaoke. Like that's our nerd party. So our Star Wars one, we had the movie shown on the screens while everyone was

partying we had our menu um we had trivia and all of that stuff so did you have blue milk we did have blue milk yeah we did we absolutely did donald i've been to the uh the cantina at disney sorry at disneyland yeah you've been to Galaxy's Edge? Galaxy's Edge. I don't know, the restaurant at the canteen at the Star Wars Disney thing. Isn't it the Andar Spire or something like that? It was gross. It was gross. No, it wasn't. It was amazing. You take that back,

Zachary Braff. Listen, the design of it, the set design of the restaurant is cool. Shut the fuck up. Don't make me curse on Star Wars. You're not telling me that any drink you had or anything you ate was mildly edible or drinkable. It was all edible and drinkable, and it was all very delicious.

And $17. That's how much you're drunk on the Star Wars Kool-Aid. You're like, that was the best food I've ever had. It was fucking nasty. I didn't say that. And also, they have a lot of attitude. You best watch your mouth. They have a lot of attitude in there, too.

You best watch your mouth, okay? You're going down a path that I can't follow you. Zachary, you're breaking my heart. I didn't like it. Bring a little optimism into your life with The Bright Side, I didn't like it. I'm so excited about this podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart. Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side.

Imagine you ask two people the same exact set of seven questions. I'm Minnie Driver, and this was the idea I set out to explore in my podcast, Minnie Questions. This year, we bring a whole new group of guests to answer the same seven questions including actress and star of the mega hit sitcom friends courtney cox you can't go around it so you just go through it this is a roadblock it's gonna catch you down the road go through it deal with it comedian writer and star of the series catastrophe rob delaney Rob Delaney. I shouldn't feel

guilty about my son's death. He died of a brain tumor. It's part of what happens when your kid dies. Intellectually, you'll understand that it's not your fault, but you'll still feel guilty. Alt-rock icon, Liz Phair. That personal disaster wrote Guyville. So everything comes out of a dead end. And many, many more. Join me on season three of Many Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. Professional dancer Cheryl Burke has been part of Dancing with the Stars since the very beginning. 26 seasons of the samba, the rumba and the cha-cha. 24 partners, 6 finals and 2 mirrorball trophies.

She knows all the secrets, the behind the scenes arguments and the affairs, the flings, the flirting and the fighting. It's time to tell it all on her new podcast, Sex, Lies and Spray Tans. We'll take you all the way back to season one and up through today for the dance floor drama like you wouldn't believe. Former partners, co-stars, friends and frenemies will join Cheryl each week. Listen to Sex, Lies and Spray Tans

on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. It's Chelsea Handler. And if you listen to my podcast, Dear Chelsea, you know that I love making space for women to share their stories. And that is why I'm excited to be part of Women Take the Mic, iHeartRadio's celebration of women who make music, influence change, and create culture. All month long, your favorite voices from talk radio, music and podcasting will highlight the remarkable achievements made by women and discuss the most significant issues facing us today. Search Women Take the Mic to listen

to a collection of International Women's Day episodes from iHeart's top podcasts, including Angela Yee's Lip Service, The Psychology of Your 20s, and Dear Chelsea. It is a great way to support women and discover your new favorite show. Listen to Women Take the Mic on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. All right, we got to keep moving. Holly, give a question for us. Anything.

I do. I do. All right. So on my menu, I have like cheesecakes and donuts and cakes and cinnamon rolls, like all those things. Yes. And I want to know. I want to know if you had an item On my menu named after you What would it be

And what would it be called Well I would Because of this podcast And how far we've come I at one point had a donut machine And I got rid of that donut. So if you were making donuts, I would love for you to have Donnie's Donuts on your menu.

Donnie's Donuts. And it's an assortment of little donut holes. Okay. Chocolate, powdered sugar, jelly, cinnamon, and maybe a little bit of sprinkles. Sprinkles. Okay. I'll write that down. I really love peanut.

Downy's Donuts. I like peanut butter anything. Oh, hell yeah. So I would like a cupcake. Okay. That is peanut butter and chocolate, in the spirit of a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, but a cupcake.

Right. And then there's some nuts on top. Okay. And then the title is put your nuts on me. Put your nuts on me. I like that. I like that. I have made a chocolate,

a chocolate cupcake filled with peanut butter pie filling. Yeah. Ooh. You had me in love. And like a chocolate frosting. Okay. Here's where the problem. Put your nuts on me.

I like it. Thank you. Here's the problem with put your nuts on me. I like it. Thank you. Here's the problem with put your nuts on me. Not a lot of, there's going to be some people that you're not going to, that are not going to be able to eat put your nuts on me. Why? Because of the tree nut or the nut allergy. No, they're not going to order put your nuts on me.

They'll order your donut whole bullshit. So I do, my menu is like separated out into things that, you know, they're clearly nuts and things and clearly not nuts and things, but I do have a couple of peanut butter items on my menu. I don't think if you have a peanut allergy, you're going to order, put your nuts on me. Right. Hey Donald. Right.

But are you going to make these? Because if so, I really want the people, I want people to go to your website. I am going to make them. I'm going to make them. They can be made to order, but listen. Okay. Listen, everyone's going to go to your website. Say your Instagram again.

It's the Sugar Drop Maryland. Sugar Drop MD. Don't you like going to the Sugar Drop MD on Instagram? Isn't it your favorite thing to visit? You know where I love going, Zach? Where? I love going to the Sugar Drop MD. That's where I get all of my sugar.

First thing I do when I go on instagram is i look at donald to see if he's posted anything and then i go right to sugar drop md well you know if i posted anything if i posted anything it's got to be something from sugar drop md yum yum yum and you know what i do i go there and i like everything so i see that all my friends are going to get it in their feeds I just blow it up with likes not only do I like I like telling all of my friends out there on my podcast with that I host with

Zach Braff and Joelle and Daniel and we have Holly Holly on today as one of our guests yeah I like to tell everybody out there about the sugar drop MD Instagram site where you can go click the link in the bio which will take you to the store where you can go click the link in the bio, which will take you to the store and you can start buying you some of that delicious Sugar Drop MD pastry.

Okay. Now, listen. It's beautiful. Listen, everyone. I think we should all give Sugar Drop MD lots of love because this family had to pivot and made this business. And I really hope, really sincerely, as supporters of the show, if you're in the Baltimore area, that you order all your exciting baked goods, your cakes, your Joelle-shaped birthday cake, all from Hollyhock. Your pies, your cakes, your Don all from Hollyhock. All right. Your pies, your cakes, your Donnie's donuts.

Thank you so much. Zach wants you to put your nuts on them. No. You know what I mean? Put your nuts on me, right? Is that what it was called? Right. Put your nuts on me, which is great because I have very punny names to my items.

Good. And I like a good pun. All right. Donut try me. Now, it seems like you're fixing your own life, but now it's time for America's favorite, the world, the Earth's favorite new segment. Oh, yeah. Fix Your Life. Planet Earth's favorite new segment.

Holly, it's time to fix your life. Okay. So because I work at home and my husband works at home and sort of our businesses are all consuming, I need help finding a better balance between my work life and home life. Because I feel like it just never really ends. Like some people have a nine to five and then they're just done. And then I just feel like right now it's really hard to shut that down and, and separate. I know how you're talking to the right fella. I know how you feel. It's really interesting. I'm going to be honest with you. And when I say this, I don't want you to get upset about it. But some days you just have to take off and take a break and just say, you know what, I'm not going to I'm not going to do one of those things today. I'm not going to have a home life today or I'm not going to work today. today not having a home like it alienates your family and everything like that your kids and your husband but some days you need to at least one i mean you're the boss of your you're the boss

so at least once a month twice a month you guys should take a break for yourselves and spend the day together yeah you know what i mean preferably on the weekend when the kids aren't i don't know how old your kids are but when they're not zooming or they're not in school or in class or everything like that. And when your husband's not, you know, out and about delivering all of your baked delicious goods. Yeah. Do you have, do you have the ability?

I know money I imagine is tight because of the things you've told us, but do you have the ability of family member or someone who could babysit for you guys just so you guys could go off and just have some scheduled me time? Well, we can do that. I mean, I only have one kid and he's 13. So he's sort of self-sufficient now and can stay home by himself. Oh, he can stay home on his own now. So yeah, I know you're super busy, but it seems me and i'm i'm donald i i you know i you weren't on the show yet but he's told me about how uh sometimes he you know wishes he was alone um it seems to me that you guys should schedule not alone wishes i was alone

with my wife yeah right sorry i didn't mean without his wife um it. It seems to me, if you could put it in a calendar, just like you schedule everything else, you guys know, especially since you have a 13-year-old and he can be on his own, that you guys go. I know it's hard to go places, but I don't know what it's like in Baltimore, but here it's not many places you can go. But at least that you have something scheduled.

So it's just as important in your schedule as your appointment to talk to a new client is you know that you two are going to go do that this time of each week. Yeah, the calendar is important. Yes. And if there's room in the calendar to be spontaneous, take that opportunity. You know what I mean? If there is a bit of time that you guys can have to yourself and it wasn't something that

was scheduled, take that opportunity. Also, it's really fun if you surprise the person, like, you know that they don't have something to do or you can, if you want to, if you have to book them because your husband's super busy, you could say, hey, I'm not even telling you, but Saturday at one to three, don't do anything because I have, I have something I figured out. Like, I love doing that stuff. And then, then, then, then, then you start looking forward to even more because the fun of surprising the person with whatever random shit you put together yeah i love putting together a surprise yeah yeah you plan parties so you know like you could like yeah

and it doesn't be big it could literally be like i packed a cooler full of beers and we're going to the beach or we're going to the park or whatever i mean you could be it could be minimal but it's just like a thing that you plan that he knows nothing about and you're in baltimore you said that you know what you know what's great about baltimore and the maryland area just in general the wire no the crabs man they have this huge crab population that it's like you know to come in a big it's like five crabs in a brown paper bag and you freaking got a mallet and you smash the shit out of them and you eat crab meat so you're saying they should just kill crabs for fun no the crabs are already dead they don't got to kill the crab somebody else will do that for them i grew up i grew up catching them yeah yeah you know what i mean they're you you're in you're in a place that you can be as adventurous as you

want to be you just have to be willing to do it. But also it doesn't have to be, I find some of the most fun things we do, it doesn't have to be some elaborate plan. I mean, it's just like something you don't normally do. You know, we went for like an epic hike in Malibu this weekend with the dog. I just lost my dog. So it was kind of like a let's get out there and do something out of the norm to get our minds off of it. We went on this epic hike in Malibu. Didn't cost a dime. It's just a new experience and it was fun

and it was beautiful and it was like a new thing. Like, all right, let's just not do our same shit every fucking weekend. Let's just do something new and different. And I think that's really good for our brains, especially now in this crazy time. And you got a workout out of it too. So you definitely did something.

And then you got endorphins, and then you just... Go on a hike. Do you have hikes in Baltimore? Yeah. We're about 20... That's the dumbest question, anybody. That's the dumbest question ever, dude. It's not in Baltimore City.

I didn't mean... First of all, she's not in the city. I didn't know she was in the city. And second of all, I don't know what the fucking elevation is in Baltimore. I don't know like, I didn't know. I didn't mean, first of all, she's not in the city. I didn't know she was in the city. And second of all, I don't know what the fucking elevation is in Baltimore. I don't know if there's mountains. Dickhead, they got hikes in New York City. Fuck face. I didn't mean on flat land ass nose. I meant like a hike up a fucking mountain. We do.

Anus. Listen. Anus ears. Anus ears. Cock eye lips. Cock eye lips. Listen. Oh my God. anus ears anus ears listen cockeyed lips cockeyed lips listen all a hike is is moving your feet

through a section of anywhere but my reference my reference was the fucking mountains in Malibu dick nose oh my god doo doo face

alright you need to get off of that bullshit you're embarrassing us in front of Holly Hawk. You're embarrassing yourself, dick lick. You're not going to get any of my Joelle cake when I arrive. Alright, Holly,

it sounds like it's time to say you're welcome. You are so welcome. A round of applause. Thank you. Thank you for coming on the show. And I think you can stay until the end because we did it, Donald. There's nothing else to say about this episode. We love some of them a little bit more than others.

We got to be honest. This one was just okay. But we had some laughs still, right, Donald? We had some great moments in this show. And, you know, unfortunately for everyone out there, this wasn't Zach's favorite episode. Right, but that's just subjective. It's up to everyone else.

Yeah, Zach didn't like it, and also Zach is the reason why we're going to one a week. So on that note, I just want to say, oh boy. No, listen. Oh boy. We're only going to one a week for a little while while Uncle Zach does some work. Because of Zach. Because of Zach. Okay.

Lawrence Kasdan once said being a writer is signing up to have homework for the rest of your life well guess what i have a little homework well you know what if lawrence kasdan said it i agree yeah there you go i knew i'd get you with lawrence kasdan there you go uh thank you everybody for listening to the program um there'll be new merch up um sorry about the lack of... We just didn't know they would sell out so quickly. So you can always go to CottonBureau.com and search for Fake Doctors Real Friends

where you'll see our merch. Be on the lookout for our Appletini video. Yes, sir. Today. If you are listening to this... Not today, tomorrow. If you are listening to this today, which is Tuesday, 6 p.m. live

on Instagram. That's 6 p.m. L.A. time. Donald and I will be fulfilling our promise to those of you who registered or checked your registration and we're teaching you how to make your very own scrub-style appletini. So please come check that out. And just because we reached our goal,

times 11 or whatever. Right. We did it big. You guys can still do it. Headcount.org slash Zach and Donald. Anything else to say, Donald? I love all of you. I love you so much.

We love you. Thanks for having me. We love you. And be kind and stay safe. And thank you, Holly and Fox. See you next time. you conversations about culture, the latest trends, inspiration, and so much more. I am so excited about this podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart.

Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side. Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at The Daily Show, which means he's also back in our ears on The Daily Show Ears Edition podcast. Join late-night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews, and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to The Daily Show Ears Edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Martha Stewart, and we're back with a new season of my podcast. This season will be

even more revealing and more personal with more entrepreneurs, more live events, and more questions from you. I'm talking to my cosmetic dermatologist, Dr. Dan Belkin, about the secrets behind my skincare. Encore Jane about creating a billion-dollar startup. Walter Isaacson about the geniuses who changed the world. Listen and subscribe to the Martha Stewart Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Raquel Willis. I'm Raquel Willis. Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles, a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words. This season, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states. We will always exist and we will definitely not let them take away our joy, no matter how hard they try.

No matter how hard they try.