Fake Doctors, Real Friends with Zach and Donald - 310: My Rule of Thumb with Bill Lawrence

Episode Date: December 1, 2020

On this week's episode, a terminally ill patient makes Ted a happy man. In the real world, the team is elated to have Bill back in the studio! Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Walter Isaacson, about the geniuses who changed the world. Listen and subscribe to the Martha Stewart Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Oh, my God. I've never missed three people more in my life. In fact, I never missed how many hundreds of thousands Are listening so much I really missed you all You don't call

You don't write I want to save it for the podcast I can't be calling you and wasting gems By the way I want to start off right off the bat By saying Joel I think you need to be a fucking podcast star Because I listened to your intro To the thing you cut together for the fans because we couldn't be on. Very kind.

And you are just so charming. And I mean, I know this from being on the show with you, but I'm saying when you were alone, you were so charming and charismatic and your voice was so soothing. And Will Pearson, our overlord at iHeart, I know you're listening. You got to fucking give Joelle her own show. Even if it's with Donald or not. But I mean, you're a great on-air talent, Joelle. Thank you, sir. I appreciate it.

It was my pleasure. I like getting to talk to the fans directly. It was fun. Right, Donald? Do you want to chime in? I didn't listen to the show. Oh my God.

This motherfucker. Oh my God. It's the most classic Donald sentence I've ever heard in my life. Oh, no. I'm going to be honest. I'm going to be honest with you. No, I'm glad you kept it real because you might have fucking lied. I'm going to be honest with you guys.

I never listen to the show other than when we do our edits. No, I don't either. After we're done listening to it back before we put it out, I don't listen to it when it goes live. But you might have listened. You could literally take four minutes and listen to Joel's intro, which is beautiful. None of y'all motherfuckers got kids, yo. That shit's hard to do.

Oh, God. You know what? I'm saying kids is the ultimate excuse. It's so bullshit. And I know it's hard, but you always use kids. You always use kids. It's the go-to, but it's true, though, man. Put them in front of fucking bubble guppies and listen to Joelle

And then my and then my kids brains are fucking bubble guppy doubt No, they can fucking bubble guppy for five minutes while you fucking respect Joelle Sorry I'm the one who made you unlatched this time. I'm sorry Sorry, I'm the one who made you unlatched. I'm the one who made you unlatched this time. I'm sorry. Parents, I just wanted to be 100% out there with y'all. That was Zach Braff who made you unlatched today.

It wasn't Donald Faison. I'm sorry. No, I'll soothe it. Get it back. Get him back on. There it is. There it is. Oh, my God. That's the nastiest way to get a kiss.

Why? Get the baby back on. Okay. Okay. Get the baby back. Okay. Yeah. Let him. There it is. There it is. I'm deeply disturbed.

Feel the milk flow. Yes. Yes. Let it in. Let it in. It's so gross. Oh, man. I missed you guys.

I missed everyone. I missed all you listeners. I missed everybody. So much has happened. So much has happened. So much has happened. I don't even know where to begin. The ICU beds are filling up. That's the clearest way for me to tell it to you.

If you live in certain counties in this country, there are just no ICU beds left. So if you have a stroke, there's nowhere for them to put you. I read an article where someplace in, I believe it was Arizona. Could be wrong about that. They're starting to treat people in the fucking waiting room. Yeah. There's just no room. There's no more ICU beds. This is what happens when the message that's sent out is a convoluted message, right?

Is that the right word? Where it's kind of all over the place and wear a mask, don't wear a mask. It doesn't matter if you wear a mask. This is what happens. This is what happens when you have poor leadership. And I know people. It's also what happens. This is the first we've reached an era, as we all know, I'm not stating anything groundbreaking, but where we have two different sets of facts. I mean, there is obviously a set of facts, but people are digesting a completely different fact set. And you can't really, it's pretty, I mean, Dan and Joelle, you're smart about this. You can't really maintain a democracy like that if you don't agree on facts.

Well, there's facts and then there's made up facts. There's facts and then there's made up facts. And the made up facts are now being considered just as factual as real facts. And that's new. And that's new. And that's new. And I'm sure that Mr. Trump will go and start a network, a Trump network, as everyone seems to think he will.

And none of this is going away. I mean, he's just going to... No, there's 70 million people that voted for him. Yeah, now he's going to be Rupert Murdoch. He's going to be his own Rupert Murdoch. So anyway... Good for... Listen, listen. It's all about making money for the guy anyway.

And for all of his followers and all of his constituents and all of these people who are falling in line, you know, hey, I get it. You have a leader that you want to follow and you feel like he's going to take you to the promised land. At the end of the day, who do you think he cares about more? You or himself? Let's just be honest. He's playing golf every day. I know people are dying of COVID. He's playing golf every day. I put this on Twitter. I was saying, think of everyone in your life, even the most selfish person you know, even the most narcissistic, fucked up person you know.

up person you know can you think of anyone you know or even tangentially know that if they were president and 2 000 people were dying a day of a pandemic would go play golf no it's so hard to believe like we saw it happen and it's still impossible to believe that someone could have so little care for so many lives being lost and like you can easily it's still baffling to me there's so many testimony you guys have very eloquently stated the testimonials about what it was like watching somebody go through this i read about a woman in georgia whose father and aunt died of covid days apart and like what her struggle was of just like how do we honor their wishes and but also we want to keep this personality it. It's just awful. The evidence is everywhere.

And then to hear the doctors specifically coming back to discuss, it's awful to see patients who were like, I didn't think it was real gasping for their last breath. Not even, I didn't think it was real, gasping for their last breaths and still not believing, still calling it a hoax. Still insisting it's not real. Still insisting it's a hoax. We're going to have to try and figure out.

This is bad messaging. This is bad leadership. And at the end of his run, it just seems like he's like, because I lost, fuck it all. You know what I mean? And that's unfortunate. You know what I mean? It does seem to be like, I mean, the attitude of playing golf seems to me like, I'm out

of ideas. We'll wait for the vaccine. The problem is that that vaccine making a difference and being so everywhere for everyone isn't going to be until the end of next year. Yeah, but that doesn't mean people can't get it. There'll be a lot of people who can get it when it comes out. This will be distributed really fast, Zach. Really fast.

Well, Gail and Joel, correct me if I'm wrong, but what I've read is, of course, frontline workers and seniors and people more susceptible first. But the average Joe who's not in those categories, what are they talking, summer, Daniel? Something like that. Yeah. There's tiers that you can check out of when people are going to be getting their releases and stuff but I agree but a healthy male in his 40s is probably summer

probably a few months away most definitely unless you got that money I was going to say unfortunately money always talks but also I think the bigger problem is going to be getting people to take it at all there are people who don't believe it's real and will therefore not take the vaccine i already don't necessarily approve everything like some of the

shit that should be approved the fda doesn't necessarily approve not the medicines we're then that means it shouldn't have been approved right but well i mean i think marijuana should be approved by the fda so that we all wait that shit. For what, though? For what? For nausea, for insomnia, for glaucoma, for pain relief. If we're going there, I think that stuff needs a little bit more testing. Because the thing is, if we're just talking about smoking weed, and to borrow a line from a favorite documentary, the crude combustion of a plant substance inhaled into our lungs, if that's what we're talking about, then no way are they going to approve that because that's bad for you on the surface.

Inhaling smoke into your lungs is bad for you. But so are all of these other things. But by the way, I'm sorry to break it to you and the people I know who smoke a whole lot more weed than I do. The FDA, you're not going to like what the FDA says. They're probably going to come out and say, by the way, it does affect memory loss. By the way, it does fuck up your lungs. And it can cause cancer, no doubt. But yeah, so I mean, you might want to chill on the FDA.

Hold on, but so do all of these other pills. So does Oxycontin. All of these things are freaking major fucking drug problems in America right now. And you can't sit here and tell me that because I smoke weed and I'm going to, I might, oh my God. There's a possibility that I – and it's a real possibility. There's a possibility I could get cancer. There's a possibility that I could lose my memory. But there's a possibility when you take all of these other drugs that you can do so many other things as well. I don't understand how that's okay. I just think that these are kind of – we're moving into slightly different conversations here.

We're talking about addiction and the opioid crisis in America and across the world for that matter. I think that's a slightly different conversation than the effectiveness and the efficacy of the FDA and vaccines and stuff like that. You know why Donald changed the subject? Because he smokes too much pot. Hey, talking to quite a huge pot smoker over here,

and I would love nothing more than for cannabis to be legalized recreationally across the country on a federal level to get to expunge all of the records of these petty criminal drug charges that have kept people in jail for years and years and years. But it would take the FDA to do that shit. No, it wouldn't. Because it wouldn't. No, it's just recreational. It's just recreational cannabis. And then it's just expunging criminal laws. But federal. OK, yes wouldn't. No, it's just recreational. It's just recreational cannabis. And then it's just expunging criminal laws. But federal.

OK, yes, exactly. A federal law needs to pass. And that's something on Joe Biden's thing. But like if we're just talking about like dangerous or something like that, like alcohol kills more people. Marijuana hasn't killed anybody. No, that's not true. That is absolutely true. It's 100% true.

You can't. No, hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. You can't. OK, hold on hold on hold on hold on you can't say okay hold on you gotta be no doubt you gotta be clear about it when you say that shit so okay so marijuana overdose of thc has never happened but that doesn't mean somebody smoking marijuana

didn't have their senses about them and stepped outside and got hit with something that's different they got hit by a car the car killed them well well well well they're not being able to process what's going on also to put stepped into okay well then then anger is a drug just like marijuana because people who are angry so sugar also died i feel like sugar sugar i mean like this is a slippery slope i'm just gonna say guys guys marijuana has not killed a single person all right right, everybody calm down. Ever. We're so passionate because we haven't seen each other. We have so much to say. I know, it's great.

And I want to let the audience in on a little surprise that in 15 minutes, the Bill Lawrence is going to join us for the rest of the episode. He had to come and join late, but he missed us as well and wanted to join. And I said, yes. Yes, Bill. Excited, Tom? I'm very very excited did you watch ted lasso i told you to watch ted lasso dude you told me to watch ted lasso at like 10 p.m last night i

told you you should start it out of respect for our friend how the fuck am i listen man okay donald i'm sorry you haven't seen ted lasso no no i've watched it three times it's so good i watch very little television. This is a conversation. I'm going to watch the season finale. I promise you. I'm going to. Oh, God.

Oh, my God. He's going to do the finale thing. Fucking asshole. I'm going to watch the series finale. I'm going to talk about this. I'm going to watch the series finale. Oh, I'm really infuriated. I like it.

I got to tell you. I'm going to talk about this when Bill comes on. So I'll wait. But I'm just going to say real quickly. And we'll go back to other shit. Because I want to save you, I'm going to talk about this when Bill comes on. So I'll wait. But I'm just going to say real quickly, and then we'll go back to other shit. Because I want to save it for Bill. But I cried my eyes out at that finale. It's so heartwarming.

It's so good, you guys. Episode two, I agree, everyone. I agree episode two is the best because I directed it. But other ones are good too. But the last thing I want to say about, oh, I broke my toe. I should probably announce. Oh, no. What happened?

My motorcycle, I had a bit of a, I had a wee motorcycle accident. A wee motorcycle accident? Well, I wasn't going fast at all. But a woman in a family, or at least a husband and wife and a child. Well, I'm not going to blame them. The driver took a blind corner in the Hollywood Hills. She took it just basically in what would be my lane. If I was a car, it would have been a head-on collision. She just was coming around a blind corner on what was her left side and my right side. Fortunately, I wasn't in a car because it would have been a head-on.

I was in a motorcycle so I could skid off to the right. We weren't going fast. I was only five miles an hour. But in skidding off to the right, lost my balance, had to jump off to the right and the entire bike fell on my right foot.

And this woman's like, sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't cry, aye. And this woman's like, sorry. Did you cry? I'm sorry. I didn't cry, but fuck it hurt. And it really got huge. And then I went to the orthopedist who said the middle bone of my big toe is, he said, I'm not going to even tell you the medical word for it, but it means smashed. Thank you, doctor.

There's not much you can do for a broken toe except wear this thing. I have this thing. That looks like the new Chanel shoes. I put on my Instagram, I was like, these new Yeezys are fire. But that sucks. I have to ice it and

do that shit. But by the way, I wanted to say the last thing about the drug conversation is they tried to give me not Oxy but something like it. And I was like, no, I'll take Tylenol. And he's like, oh, I'll write you the script. And I was like, no. I don't fucking want it. I don't even want it in my house. And I'm telling you people who are listening.

I'm advising you as a fake doctor. Unless you are in fucking real holy shit pain do not take these drugs they are giving to you they are fucking addictive agree and once you're on you're stuck you're done so if fucking advil and ice and and actually advil is wrong for this he said he said extra strength tylenol um it will help it better and weed if you're a pot smoker but do not unless you are in oh my god i cannot survive pain do not fucking take these drugs they are addictive and they will fuck you up read a book called dope sick michael keaton is making a movie about it what does adderall do adderall's for attention deficit disorder that's when you why is everybody taking adderall because if you don't

have add it does the opposite and it's like speed so if you have add it helps you Because if you don't have ADD, it does the opposite and it's like speed. So if you have ADD, it helps you focus. If you don't have ADD, it's like cocaine. It makes you fucking like, woohoo! Don't take Adderall either. So wait, let me get this straight. So all of these people that are doing Adderall are pretty much doing cocaine? Yeah, it's speed, right? Right, guys?

Yeah, essentially, it listen, if you Helps it concentrate yeah people look at i had a couple late nights in college i'm not gonna lie things happen uh people i mean college kids that mike jackson was on propofol no that that's that's very different and also awful that was it milk that's used they no dude they use that in surgery to put No, that's very different and also awful. Was it milk? No, dude, they used that in surgery to put you under. But he was getting

injected to go to sleep at night. Was that what it was? Jeez. Some of these things, like, I want that Regeneron. I'm not going to lie to you, man. You don't want Regeneron. I'm saying you don't need the Regeneron. If you get Regeneron, it means you're fucking sick as fuck.

I have a question for you guys. But they say if you take the Regeneron, it helps against the COVID too, though, doesn't it? Like before you get COVID too, though, doesn't it? Because you're just pumping antibodies into your body? I don't know. I don't know. Was that on Newsmax? I don't know.

I don't know. I think I saw somebody talk about it. Yeah, that's really helpful these days. All right, listen. I have a question for you guys, totally off topic. Yeah. helpful these days all right listen i have a question for you guys totally off topic yeah let's say i'm buying my girlfriend a christmas present on craigslist from san francisco uh-huh and it's pricey but it's awesome i wouldn't do it no listen how do i do it such that i don't get ripped off i'd'd like to say, I saw that.

What's the, what's the equivalent of like escrow in this situation? I saw that team mom where she tried to buy that car on, on Craigslist and she lost the money, man. I would, I'm just saying, man,

I don't know about Craigslist. Daniel, Joelle, do you have any, do they have a rating? Can you see like how they've sold before and they've completed the transactions and such? Craigslist, I really leave a lot up to the description.

However much work someone's willing to put into them trying to sell you something. What if I negotiate with the fella such that I go, you're going to get X amount to ship it to me, and when it arrives, I'll give you the Y amount. But then you're sketchy, though. How does it work? That's the thing.

I would go to freaking Amazon before I go to Craigslist. No, this is a very special thing that I had to search for and found on Craigslist San Francisco. I mean, you know, I would say get a third party who has some you know muscle or someone with them to muscle you mean like a like a bodybuilder guy I mean I don't mean like a bodybuilder but like I'll put it to you this way if I was going to go get something on craigslist

no matter what it was I'm bringing a friend and Donald has Donald has himself called me stocky and like I could fuck somebody up and I still would bring a friend with me no matter where I go to pick anything up. Right. But I'm, they murdered people on this shit, dog. They murdered people on this shit. There must be some app.

We'll look it up. And by the way, if you want to solve this conundrum and you're listening, um, please email Joelle. What's our email again? Well, it's scrubs.

I heart at gmail.com. Email us at scrubs. I heart at gmail.com and tell Joelle. What's our email again, Joelle? It's scrubsiheart at gmail.com. Email us at scrubsiheart at gmail.com and tell Joelle how you best recommend I deal with this conundrum. Actually, you know what? It's funny that we're talking about this because I know somebody who might be able to help with this exact problem.

Oh, sorry to interrupt. Is it Bill Lawrence? Bill Lawrence has arrived, ladies and gentlemen. What is going on with that headband? He's wearing a pink headband. He's got his Rambo headband on. He looks like a war. If Rambo had a pink headband.

Oh, wait. No, it's down around his neck. Oh, I see. Oh, wow. I go out, and then when I come in, I go full-on tennis star from the 80s and do that. There you go. Nice. Yeah, nice.

You look really cool. By the way, I'm not laughing because it's not true. I'm laughing because it was cool of Zach to say it. I'm wearing a very tight pink headband. I'm going to blow you up for one second because we're going to move on to a lot of other things. We haven't seen each other in two weeks, so we're just rambling.

Oh, cool. Hey, guys. By the way, I missed you both. I love you both. It's good to see you guys. I was confessing to these guys, but I stopped because I knew you were coming on, that I saved the finale of Ted Lasso because I was enjoying the show. I'm happy to be a part of it, and I was really enjoying it. And I saved the finale for just a few nights ago and i i i i sobbed and bill i'm not talking when tears stream down your face i'm talking when you start to make an audible noise you people listening know what i'm talking

about when you're like and you're like why tears thing, dude. You don't need to make audible noises. That makes me happy. It was so beautiful, dude. And I really, really, really am. I hope it's okay to say proud because I don't mean to connote. I mean, it's weird because you're my mentor, but I'm so proud of you. Oh, thank you. By the way, it's not.

It's my favorite thing is as much as I think I annoy you guys all for you by calling this my podcast. Hey, Joelle. Hey, Daniel. I calling this my podcast. Hey, Joelle. Hey, Daniel. I call this my podcast. I get a little secret anger every time somebody tweets to you and me about Ted Lasso. Yeah, I love it. I love it. Listen, Bill, I'm just going to put this out there.

When you do the rewatch podcast for Ted Lasso, i be the host for that in 20 years donald you'll be you'll be 60 that'll be 66 it's all right my first topic is look i know zach he had to work so you guys had to have a week down right um and so next time donald and i host and we make it a episode slash talk about Zach episode it's going to be delicious my concern is that the fans will like it more and then I'll be out of a hobby they won't I'll be

respectful I need my hobby Bill and if you're extra charming as you can be the fans are going to be like well that was fucking way better bring back Bill. Bring back Bill. You know I can dial it up and down depending on the situation.

Yeah, could you give level 5 charm, Bill, instead of level 10 charm when you do this? Yeah. Good to see you. We've done 24 minutes without mentioning Scrubs, so we should probably get into it. Five, six, seven, eight. Here's some stories about a show we made.

About a bunch of docs and nurses and a janitor who loved to hate. I said here's some stories that we all should know. So gather round to hear our – gather round to hear our Gather round to hear our Scrubb's Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald Welcome to the show. We know you were upset we were off for two weeks. I'm so sorry. My Instagram is...

I love... Were we off for two weeks? We weren't off for two weeks. Sorry. We were on the last week. We came on this week. We missed a week. so what does that mean? You mean we didn't put a new show?

Yeah, it means there was a gap. There was a one-week gap. But there was a show. We did put a show out, though. We put out a clip show. Bill will tell you it's pretty ballsy to put out a clip show your third season, but we did it. Especially, by the way, on a a podcast but let me say something let me let me say something let me let me quickly

say something in our defense a lot of people who do these bank episodes okay now we could do that we could bank five of them and never have never missed but i i quite enjoy this show being somewhat current i like that we can talk i mean we we usually um record on a friday and air it on a tuesday this week we're recording on a wednesday because it's the holiday but i i i and i think the fans i assume the fans like that that we can talk about at least somewhat i don't want to air episodes that we recorded a month ago no but look as as as the guy that owns and pays all of your salaries for my podcast you know i will say i don't like it when if we can make it so we don't drop a week even if it means me guest hosting you're right you got it you got

it as long as you promise if you're willing to if you're really willing to do that bill you're a very busy man you He wants to fucking take over. The fucking Bill's podcasting is not a joke. Donald, be cool. There's going to be years in my podcast. You've got to be cool, man. I love that Donald, after all this time, you don't know him well enough to know the Bill's podcasting is not really a joke. You've just got gotta be cool that's my favorite it's my favorite thing to do with all of our tv writer friends

if anybody starts telling me their idea for a show or a show they're working on a pilot they're doing i usually wait like 20 minutes i go you know telling me, I now own about a third of this, right? I was like, ha, ha, ha. For real, I feel like I have a contract somewhere. If you make a mistake and tell me about it, then it's mine. That's how it works. Yes. That's not how it works.

Hi, everybody. So now we're going to talk about the TV show Scrubs. Donald, do you have your recap ready? This is a great episode. It was a great episode and uh there's a big fun trivia about this episode that bill is a perfect person to have on to talk about oh yeah and by the way this makes me really happy don't mention it yet bill i'm teasing i'm doing what's called in the podcast radio world i'm teasing something it is a tease all right yes all right we'll do a call back right after if you're doing tv. All right, here comes my timer.

Ready, Donald? Yes. And go. Tara Reid is back, and she's covered in toilet paper, and it is hot. Kelso is trying to convince Ted, the lawyer, to kill himself. Cox may not like Turk, but he damn sure respects him. And Carla and Elliot need a manhole. How people view us is important.

For so many wrong reasons, we're always worried about how we're perceived. I'll say this to that. What I eat don't make you shit, so why worry? Wow. What I eat don't make you shit, so why worry? You were right on the 30-second mark.

You had seven seconds to expound on that, but I thought that was well said. It was incredibly well said. I want a T-shirt that says that. Is that a quote? That's something I heard Jay-Z say once, and I was like, that's a great line. What you eat don't make me shit. No, I was going to credit you for it, but it was Jay-Z. I'd take that on a T-shirt, please.

Hova. I tell you what I can't do and get away with it is quote Jay-Z. I'd take that on a t-shirt, please. Hova. I tell you what, I tell you what I can't do and get away with it is quote Jay-Z without seeming like an idiot. That's not true. You can do it. Really? Let me try it right now.

Okay. What I eat don't make you shit. And that's something I've always thought about comedy. I think that's good. I didn't sound right coming out of him. It didn't sound right. Well, he could,

how about this? Well, you can say, I think if you're, if you're a white guy, you have to be like, and as Jay-Z once said, what I eat, don't make me shit. Also, I think I'm doing age as part of it. I'm just too old, you know, to be quoting. Maybe not Jay-Z. I was about to say, you guys are the same age, aren't you?

Yeah, he's got to be pushing 5-0 now, right? He's close to it. When is your birthday? It's coming up. Yeah, day after Christmas. Oh, shit. Bill, if the world weren't ending, I would give you the biggest birthday hug. Actually, Bill, you're in my – we've potted.

We've become pod buddies, so I can see you at least. I'm going to come visit. Yeah, we'll find a way, man. We'll find a way to hug. It's the 26th. Sorry, it's the 26th. You're not Jesus. Jesus is day.

You're day after Jesus. Yeah. Well, yeah. All right. Don't say you're not Jesus to me. I take offense to that. You're no Jesus, Bill. Janae Bakken is the writer on this one with the very talented Craig Zisk as the director.

And it's the Christmas episode, which is sort of apropos because we're getting into the holiday season. Bill, let's start open with yeah well there's christmas i don't know if it's the christmas episode but there's christmas decorations everywhere okay yeah i think it's the closest episode we had air into christmas i don't think we did a christmas episode this year so bill tell everyone what the very unique only once i believe in eight and a half or nine seasons did did this occur? Tell everybody what occurred. So this is fascinating, man, because the, look, it's an old argument that's kind of gone away thanks to streaming. But what television, network television specifically,

considered appropriate with censors and with standards and practices was so weird, and with standards and practices was so weird, especially, you know, the age old argument was violence, you know, versus sexual content. You know, you kill anybody on TV, but don't have anybody, you know, taking someone's shirt off or something like that. It was crazy. And this episode in particular drove me insane because it was before medicinal marijuana was crazy, crazy widespread. And the episode was originally written that Elliot and Carla are trying to help a cancerous woman who is on the way out and just having such a hard time with the pain and the discomfort. just having such a hard time with the pain and the discomfort.

It was them out and about trying to get her marijuana because they knew medically that it would alleviate a shit ton of her symptoms. And we handed that script in and said, you can't air this. You can't, unfortunately for you on NBC, even though it's for altruistic reasons, you can't have a physician and a nurse driving around trying to find someone they can buy pot off of. Now, wait, pause one moment there, Bill. As I recall, you handed it in, but we had begun shooting. We shot a scene or two of it, as I recall. Yeah, but, you know, that just makes me look like some. All right.

So what's Zach's story? One of the parts of zach's story is bill sometimes didn't hand in the script until after we started oh yeah oh yeah but you did yeah the subtext is bill uh well you had the you had the power and clout to be able to do shit like that in the day but and this was the one chance this is the one opportunity where they were like yeah but no yeah so say they said we wouldn't air it and partly because it was an easy fix and partly because i found it so hypocritical i said all right well because we need this story to still work structurally we'll just have the woman that's

dying be a virgin and we'll have elliot and carla go look for a man whore so she can get laid. And they're like, Oh, that's fine. I love that you were being facetious and they were like, all right, fine. Yeah. Do that. They can't go, even though it's proven by,

you know, so many medical studies. And now, as you guys know, we use, you know, different products, CBD, et cetera, for any pain yeah but this was this was

this was whatever this was yeah 18 years ago even back then it was considered an amazing treatment for the side effects for chemo you know and for uh for nausea and for all that stuff so i'm like doctors can't go get a patient that's dying marijuana but they can go to anywhere and get her a man horse so she can have sex in the hospital. Yeah. That sounds funny. I'm like, all right,

but it is funny. By the way, it was really funny. It is funny. By the way, it's a very, it's a very funny episode bill with a lot of memorable quotes, including the first ever.

What has two thumbs and doesn't give a crap. Bob, Bob, by the way, never ever. And that's an old joke. ever what has two thumbs and doesn't give a crap. Bob, Bob, by the way, never, ever. And that's an old joke. And the only reason that joke feels new is it has never,

ever been delivered better than Ken Jenkins delivered. Man, just, and by the way, you know, it's next version. It's sequel, which you guys will get to is what has two thumbs and still doesn't give a

crap. That's funny. By the way, instead of Bob Kelso, how you doing? It's Bob Kelso. is what has two thumbs and still doesn't give a crap. By the way, instead of Bob Kelso, how you doing? It's Bob Kelso, I thought we had met. You know, I had never heard this joke until this moment. Me neither. Yeah, this was the first time. And so I kind of got caught off guard when he was like,

what has two thumbs and doesn't give a crap? I was like, what has two thumbs and doesn't give a crap? And then when he goes, bam. I laugh so hard. I don't think I've, yeah. You're absolutely right. Ken crushes it better than anybody has ever done. It's hilarious. And like Donald,

I didn't know it was a known joke. I thought you guys came up with it, but I thought it was fucking hilarious. He's an assassin when he just says things like they're real that way uh it just kills me uh my biggest memory of and you guys can then drag through the different part of this particular episode was um i occasionally had times on scrubs i'm sure you guys did too that i'd wander onto set i wouldn't be sure what we were doing and then what was happening there would make me think that i was on hallucinogens or have a moment like how is this how is anybody letting us do this on television oh my god that's so many moments because i had a bunch of things going on in this episode and was working on other things too sometimes and i i strolled down into the apartment set which

was away from everywhere else and i walked in and and Tara Reid was sitting on a throne of toilet paper. And there were like a bunch of male models dancing around. And I'm like, what the hell is going on? How is this? This isn't something for national television, is it? Like, no, no, you guys, it's in the script. I know. There is some hilarious shit in there.

That shit had me rolling. Tara Reid dancing and doing the shimmy. There's two different. She's doing the shimmy. There's two different Tara Reid. You're conflating two. There's one where she's in a room made of toilet paper, drinking a cocktail out of a toilet paper roll.

And then there's another where I'm sort of a studious, nerdy guy reading my book. And she's filled the apartment with male strippers who are gyrating all over her. And she's sh the apartment with male strippers who are gyrating all over her. And she's shimmying. Yeah. I think that was Banana Hammocks Everywhere or something, right? Yeah, it'll be Banana Hammocks Everywhere. Bill, why do J.D. and Turk have a rule about the guests bringing their own toilet paper?

I think that that was… What was the seed of that idea? I think that that was What was the seed of that idea? That was loosely based on a story I told about my college roommate named Steve Mack who whenever we went on spring breaks or on trips

every time he opened his backpack there'd be toilet paper in there and it just always, by the way it's like those people that bring their own pillow on trips and you think they're an idiot and then you sleep on the pillow and we used to give him shit you know like oh if you baby your ass By the way, it's like those people that bring their own pillow on trips and you think they're an idiot and then you sleep on the pillow. And we used to give him shit, you know, like, oh, if you baby your ass, it'll baby you. We used to give him constant shit about it.

But then you get to some ski resort or some shitty hotel and they would have like two-ply sandpaper hanging from a metal thing by the toilet. And Steve Mack would be like, nobody touch my own toilet paper. And I'm like like that's good that should be a rule for uh bring your own toilet paper anywhere you go that's funny yeah i have a buddy that brings his own wipes wherever he goes that's it's not dumb you know i travel with a pillow now i don't feel bad about it i did my first um pillow travel this time to london bill because i i have fallen in love with a pillow. And you can go to the fanciest hotel or the cheapest motel

and have bad pillows, and it sucks. You want to know another odd thing? And I did see this, I think, because I watched the episode last night. And I didn't want to do a Gabby, which is what it means when you have a watch the episode. Oh, my God. I told Bill.

I was like, Bill, you told us i'll bring a writer on and the writer didn't watch the episode the uh i love gabby they're so funny that was so funny it was great but we'd love to give her shit about it i know the uh you know she doesn't don't worry she doesn't listen she doesn't know we're shit talking here by the way this is on a friday she will not listen no matter what the um the other piece of trivia that i remembered about this particular episode was there's a joke about elliot saying someone saw her orgasm face and um i remember getting shit the writer's room because we were pretty good about continuity but uh we contradicted ourselves with elliot's sexual past you did a thousand times you did scrubs wiki's very upset about it i will read you a direct quote from Scrubs Wiki. Yeah, the people on TV without pity were not having it.

Let me tell you something. Here we go. It says, when Elliot is talking to her patient, she talks about a time in high school when she had a, quote, orgasm face. Yet in a previous episode, she told Carla that she has never had an orgasm. Elliot's romantic life is full of differing stories. Yeah, contradictions. We also, I think she said, once we said that she lost, I think she lost her virginity in a crawl space.

But maybe we can rationalize it by saying Elliot is just, I don't know. How can you rationalize it? You say she doesn't remember. And I think we also said, I think one time she lost her virginity with a guy that lost his arm to a bear, if you remember that. We showed that fantasy. By the way, she's so funny in this episode.

She was just, like, let loose on this episode. I mean, both the writing for her and her whole just way of being was just fucking on, like, level 10. There were some uncomfortable moments though in this episode for me no that one

Randall jumping out of the closet and Krista and Johnny C being on the bed in leather that kind of fucked me up I was like what do you remember who's in the gimp costume oh was it Randall no wait Franklin got better our second AD

this time though Krista was oiled up too Oh, was it Randall? No, wait, wait. Franklin got better. Our second AD. Yeah. Wait, hold up. This time, though, Krista was oiled up, too. They both put the oil on because they're both shiny. They were doing some Pulp Fiction gimp stuff. It was very weird, man. I can't imagine Krista reading that and being like, okay, Bill, okay. By the way, I just weighed low and tried to avoid her. You know what I mean?

I don't know about that. By the way, I just laid low and tried to avoid her. You know what I mean? This is Martin Kleba's first time on the show, and he's very funny. And he becomes a member of the janitorial staff eventually, right, Bill? Yeah. And he was riding high, too, because it was right about the time that he became kind of a Pirates of the Caribbean or Caribbean rock star. Yeah, he's a famous action hero now.

You know what I mean? He's in a lot of action movies. He's a very funny guy. And I remember he was kind of cocky off Pirates because he rolled up in a pretty baller Corvette that I always thought was funny because it was like the most dude, masculine, baller fucking muscle car. Just absolutely rock star car. Hey, we're going to take a quick break, everybody. And we'll be right back with more. Bring a little optimism into your life with The Bright Side,

a new kind of daily podcast from Hello Sunshine. Hosted by me, Danielle Robay. And me, Simone Boyce. Every weekday, we're bringing you conversations about culture, the latest trends, inspiration, and so much more. I am so excited about this podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart.

Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side. All that sitting and swiping, our backs hurt, our eyeballs sting. That's our bodies adapting to our technology. But we can do something about it. We saw amazing effects. I really felt like the cloud in my brain kind of dissipated. There's no turning back for me. Make 2024 the year you put your health before your inbox.

And take the Body Electric Challenge. Listen to Body Electric from NPR on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, my name is Jay Shetty and I'm the host of On Purpose. I just had a great conversation with Michael B. Jordan and you can listen to it right now. Michael is known for his performances in both film and television. His breakout role was in Fruitvale Station playing Oscar Grant which earned him widespread praise and numerous award nominations. His portrayal of Killmonger in Marvel's Black Panther, one of my favorites, further solidified his status as one of Hollywood's leading actors

earning him widespread acclaim for his complex and compelling performance. In our conversation, Michael really opens up. You're going to love listening to it. And I can't wait for you to check it out. The closest to getting what you want is always the hardest. It's always the feeling when you're getting ready. People give up right before they get what they've always wanted to get. People quit. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Imagine you ask two people the same exact set of seven questions.

I'm Minnie Driver, and this was the idea I set out to explore in my podcast, Minnie Questions. This year, we bring a whole new group of guests to answer the same seven questions, including actress and star of the mega hit sitcom Friends, Courtney Cox. You can't go around it, so you just go through it. This is a roadblock. It's going to catch you down the road. Go through it.

Deal with it. Comedian, writer, and star of the series Catastrophe, Rob Delaney. I shouldn't feel guilty about my son's death. He died of a brain tumor. It's part of what happens when your kid dies. Intellectually, you'll understand that it's not your fault, but you'll still feel guilty. That personal disaster wrote Guyville.

So everything comes out of a dead end. And many, many more. Join me on season three of Many Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. And we're back! How long are those breaks? Are those breaks? Daniel will know.

How long are they? Because I listened to you guys. Those breaks like 40 seconds. So they're like five, six, seven, eight seconds. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Daniel, Daniel, Daniel, Daniel, Daniel, Daniel. Turn it off. You had that locked and loaded, Bill.

I did not. I did not. I just did it. I did not. I did not. I just did it. I sold it because I can act. So Dr. Cox's cool breath of joy travels through the hospital. It finds Donald and Judy who are arguing. By the way, Donald, I laughed out loud. By the way, you were particularly silly and funny in this episode. Yeah, Donald's very funny in this episode.

I'm going to be doing what you might call watching. That was really, really funny. You were particularly... I don't know. You were just silly, and it felt like you were riffing and stuff. But when you go, I'm going to have...

You're talking about your wedding day, and you're like, I'm going to have a cape and a wind machine, and I'm going to be like, I do! I do! That was very funny. That made me laugh.

I would look good in a cape and a wind machine, though. There you go, man. So how about Elliot? Elliot takes a pic of her boobs. This is right at the beginning of cell phone cameras, I'm guessing, because this was kind of, she's like, I've got one of those new cell phone cameras. And she takes a picture.

She sends it to a random person instead of uh sean and i am assuming that's a stuntman because he took a glorious uh fake hit to the head without flinching which is advanced i mean he sold the shit out of that he does not he does not anticipate at all no it is very but first of all if you're listening and you've never tried to fake walk into a telephone pole um it's a little tricky to do the choreography of it. But not to flinch for even a split anything is the hard part. And that guy nailed it. Do you remember how many takes, Zach, in the pilot that we had to do because you would anticipate and close your eyes before you ran into the door at the end?

Yeah. That was my first first episode first time trying to do physical comedy and it's very hard to walk into a glass door you can get yourself to do the timing of the of it but but first of all the glass door unlike a telephone pole you can't fake it basically where we ended up with the pilot is you just got to do it but you can't flinch so walk into this glass door and not flinch is really fucking hard that's yeah that's a very difficult thing because your brain is like no matter what you're trying to do as an actor your brain is like no we're not gonna walk into the glass door right yeah close your

eyes right now or it's gonna hurt your eyes right right and so but but anyway this guy walked into a telephone pole like a pro that was a plus a stunt there. I think he might have been a pro. No, he was definitely a stuntman. He's one of our stunt guys. John Q. Citizen is not just showing up and doing that. So then we find... Do you guys remember? Because cell phones were new.

Do you guys remember that he gave us all beepers and pagers back then? Oh, yeah. Yeah, he gave us the very first blackberry. I thought it was the Skyways. No, Bill's Christmas present. We may have mentioned this before, but Bill's Christmas present one year was Blackberries for everybody. And I remember being like, what is this? You just write sentences and it comes up?

I like to buy technology for people about six to eight weeks before it becomes obsolete. That's my thing. Well, no, Blackberries lasted a long long time i think they finally just folded but they but but you that was my favorite very first device was from you bill did you ever have a sidekick anybody have a sidekick no that you look cool they flipped up and made a sound and everything was like a star trek yeah it looks cool you look all like that I think, by the way, Donald, I think you're onto something. I think cell phones are all the same now.

If they started doing cell phones that made cool noises or shot little hologram lasers out and it seemed like kind of a, even if it was just for bells and whistles, like a little bit of a Star Trek or Star Wars weapon. I would buy that shit.

I would buy that shit in a heartbeat if I could get an app and it was Princess Leia doing the help me obi-wan kenobi if your phone went all out hologram lightsaber when you hit that one button it's a wrap i think we're gonna get holograms in our lifetime i mean i think so you think we'll get holograms like star wars i think you're gonna see to see a... Did you not see Kim Kardashian's gift from Kanye? Oh, my gosh. Holograms already here.

No, but I... Wait, what? But she gave... Kanye gave Kim a hologram of her father singing to her, I think. Yeah, it was like a four-minute speech that he gave to her. He gave a four-minute speech, and a lot of it was about how great Kanye was. It was! No.

But I don't think it was the type of hologram like Princess Leia like projected into the middle of the room, was it? It was like encased with it. They watched it on a video and, you know, it's expensive and three dimensional and it looks like him and he speaks and walks around and smiles. Right, but I'm saying Kanye obviously hired an amazing special effects house. It wasn't like what we're talking about with C-3PO projecting Princess Leia. R2, R2, R2. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sacrilege. R2

projecting Leia. Yeah, by the way, how do you not know that? That's upsetting. It's a mistake, but he's like he like twitched. I didn't twitch, I just corrected you. I corrected you before you got all of the Do you want to talk about how Mandalorian is not as good this season Or is that going to upset you guys? You're going to be smacked in the face, man

It's better than it was last year Here's the thing that, okay, Bill I'm sorry this has to happen right now But you're going to have to Hold on, hold on Hold on, hold on Here's the thing, last year The reason why most fans Who aren't big Star Wars fans liked it last year compared to this year was because it stood true to the Western.

And it's now, you know, it was the lone man with the samurai movie. It stood true to that. The lone man, his kid, and them going through these towns. and them going through these towns. Now there's all of this story that they've developed from the future that's going to take place in the future and all the story that's developed in between Return of the Jedi and what takes place then. They have to freaking piece it together because of the,

I'm not going to say bad story writing, but because of the holes that are in it all now. I understand it doesn't make sense. You don't like it, I understand. No, no. But for Star Wars fans, hold on, let me finish. For Star Wars fans, the last five, ten minutes of that episode, where they go and they see, spoiler alert, everyone, spoiler alert. Spoiler alert.

Dan will make the spoiler noise. Baby Yoda dies. Right. alert spoiler dot dan will make the spoiler baby yoda dot right where they where they go into the room and they see all of the clone bodies and you see that this could be where snoke came from that's a big deal dude that's a huge deal for all star wars fans because when that movie came out that was a hole and it was all right i'm just speaking calm down i'm just speaking for me i i found mandalorian to be one of my favorite Star Wars things. Season one, I thought, was incredibly done.

And it's still incredibly done and incredibly made. And the production design and cinematography and storytelling, it's all great. I'm just saying, for me, these first few haven't been as holy shit intriguing as season one. For me, these first few? Maybe I'm alone. These first few for me have been incredible because of the characters they've introduced and who's coming up next. Bill, do you watch it or not? I do because it's Henry's

favorite show and he's way into it. And I think the second seasons of shows arrive with that much hoopla or that well done are always a nightmare. And to me as a writer producer, what I think that second seasons of shows arrive with that much hoopla or that well done are always a nightmare. And to me, as a writer producer, what I think you always do in a second season is slow down a smidge, try to lower expectations, get the exposition out, lay the groundwork for the stories you're going to tell, especially, you know, like that show. You're going to be on for a long time because because it's almost when you the bar is set so high it's almost impossible to realize people's expectations right you must say you have you have

this coming up next season with you have this with lasso because it's a global hit and people are like come on keep it going bill and you're like how do i how do i you can't sustain that you have to have some some ups and downs to the storytelling, I guess. I think ours is a little different because Jason, and he's kind of mapping it out, it's a three-season show.

It's like what Donald's talking about. Super fans know that they're connecting tissue in the Star Wars universe. For us, everybody knows that they get an end to this story in the third season. So, so Bill, are you giving us a fake doctors exclusive that Ted Lasso will only go

three seasons? Ted Lasso is a three season show after the third season. I will desperately try to get Mr. Sudeikis to do like the only way I think a fourth season of Ted Lasso exists would be like if Ted Lasso went and coached a soccer team who played about a block from Jason's house in real life.

You know what I mean? Oh, I see. But wait, don't mess up our exclusive, please. Ladies and gentlemen, you are hearing it from the showrunner's mouth. This might only be a three-season show. That makes sense. We would like all the press when this goes viral we want all the press for the podcast mentioned fake doctors real friends hey press when you pick this up and make it go viral you heard it on fake

doctors real friends bill talked about it on fake doctors real friends bill only said anything i'll talk about anything bill you better not give anybody else exclusives we we hear you on other podcasts and we get jealous. I don't think I've done another podcast. Yeah, you did the sportsy one. Oh, yeah, but the sports we won, they made fun of you for calling it a podcast. That's a nationally syndicated radio show. See, well, I know.

He doesn't know much about sports talk. I don't know anything. I don't know anything. That show is super cool. I really love what they do over there because it's a, much like you guys really say you're a rewatch show. You talk about the world and issues and connect. That group

is masquerading as a sports show and they talk about what's going on in the world and look after each other and stuff and it's really cool. You really like it. Give it a shout out. What's it called? It's called Dan Lippitard and Stuts and uh donald hadn't heard of it donald mr sports guy well i do watch dan libertard on on espn with his dad yep poppy poppy poppy uh and uh so i do i do i do know who he is i i didn't know he had a radio show like that.

It got so big nationally that they started airing it on ESPN two hours a day, five days a week for a while. Now it's on ESPN+. Was that the same thing with him and his dad? Was that the show with him and his dad? This one was more him and a bunch of producers and a ragtag group of guests, they kind of sort of dissect sports issues, but more talk about culture. You know? And look, they just

had a great Ted Lasso-like moment, which was ESPN made massive cutbacks and let tons of people go, and one of the beloved young producers on the show, and they're all on-air, on-screen talent, got let go. And one of the beloved young producers on the show, and they're all on air on screen talent got let go.

It just part of the ESPN things. So they stopped airing shows for a couple of weeks. And I mean, a couple of days. And when they started up again, he was miraculously Dan's assistant and had returned to the show with his salary being paid by Dan, you know,

good man. And he's a good guy, you know, and it's a interesting, it's an interesting, funny show. Roy Bellamy is the dude over there that is a massive Scrubs fan. Shout out Roy. Yeah, I know.

Shout out Roy Bellamy. Hi, Roy. Roy, I see you every week. Every week you tweet, man, something about the show. Shout out Roy Bellamy, man. Thank you, Roy. And I'm sorry I called it a podcast. I know now that it is a nationally syndicated radio show.

They're so successful they have splinter-off podcasts from their radio show. We're going to do that, too. Eventually Donald and Joelle are going to have a Star Wars thing where they... We're working on it. I owe Joelle a recording. Why are you blowing off Joelle, dude? I'm not blowing off anybody, man. I'm a busy motherfucker.

We're shooting on a Wednesday. We're recording on a Wednesday because you were freaking directing why are you directing when we're making a podcast motherfucker why are you directing when we're making a podcast the podcast is the fuck off guys Donald took his shirt off why would you take your shirt off cause I'm pissed off about this motherfucker

I'm this motherfucker just pissing me the fuck off the podcast Donald's running down the street with his camera this is crazy why are you punching yourself in the chest? I got an ice pick in my hand. I'm stabbing myself.

Y'all are missing it. I'm mad. Donald, are you mad that I had the audacity to go direct something for four days? I'm pissed off about that. I'm also upset about the fact that I saw you got an Xbox. I saw the Xbox.

Yeah, the Xbox X. You showed the picture. You know what you promised me. You know what you promised me. You and Danica both promised me something, and I'm sitting here without it. I'm just going to put that out there. I would like to give it away.

I'm going to tell you. Joelle. Yeah. Wait, wait, wait. I have to interject, Zach, because you guys have to understand that for me, this is so surreal, because when Donald was yelling, I immediately went back to one of my favorite moments in Scrubs. He's mad that J.D. went to Disneyland.

That man went to Disneyland without me. I can't. Elliot, I tried. I just can't. Wasn't that when he pulled out his hair? By the way, the continuation was you're like, I saw what you got and you're mad about that. It sounds exactly like they got a roller coaster

in the dark. They got a ride where you can see Nemo when he comes up to you and you're like, hi Nemo. No, don't you see like they got roller coasters and roller coasters in the dark. They got roller coasters and roller coasters in the dark.

I did it. I got rollercoasters. They're rollercoaster in the dark. That shit had me rolling. I did it. I can't do it. You hold it together for a second. For a second. You're like, you know, I'm fine. I'm going to go on with my day. One with a thousand.

I can't. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. That's one of the funniest. I laugh at that every time I see that shit. By the way, I've since been to Disneyland with him many times. Yeah.

I know. But you guys just recreated that in your real friendship life. Do you know that had to come from real life, though, from him going to Disneyland without me and me being pissed off about it. That had to be a real deal. It probably did happen. It probably did happen. All right, listen, Joel.

What happened on this? What were you supposed to do? You're not supposed to buy that? No, no. There's a brand new Xbox that came out. It's called the Xbox X. Is that what it's called, Daniel? Xbox Series X.

Are we supposed to get the PS5, though? That's what Joelle's still trying to get, Bill. If you want to get her a Christmas present. I got like five of them if anybody wants one. Oh, you. This is goofy, man. This is the slippery. Don't play this game.

Bill, if you really want to steal my podcast from me, find a way to gift Joel and Daniel PS5s, and I think I'll be fired. I'm yours. I'm off. I'm gone. Whatever you need, Bill. Bill has so much money, he could probably have someone make them from scratch in his basement.

Yeah. I wanted to give one for Henry for Christmas and then one for Henry to give to someone else for Christmas. So he's got a bunch of them just sitting on top. That'd be funny. I'm going to say this. I will say this for all of you out there who are PS5s and Xbox Series Xs and everything like that.

There's a system out there that you can get that's a lot of fun and the graphics are amazing. And you're in the universe also when you put the Oculus Quest 2 on. So shout out Oculus Quest 2. That is a lot of fun. And it's available at stores still. So if you really are looking for an escape this holiday weekend, this is not an ad. You sound like you're doing an ad, but they're not our sponsor.

This is not an ad. This is not a sponsorship. I'm going to tell you something right now. I'm going to tell you something right now. Out of all of the things I've played so far, the Oculus Quest 2 is the best. Alright, so they should be our sponsor after this endorsement. Can I read the text

that I'll just send me? Yes, I think they will send you free stuff. By the way, I did something on Twitter. If you have one of these Oculus things, I asked my followers uh i just got this what should i uh do slash play and there's like hundreds of replies of of people so if you're curious and you get one go find that tweet and you can read a lot of people's cool

recommendations on it for all my star wars fans out there there's star wars uh squadrons i play that on the oculus quest too I had to do a lot of connecting things to make it work. But a new game has come out called Galaxy's Edge. Journey to Galaxy's Edge. It's an action-adventure game. It's got a bunch of really

cool things that you can do in it. What are you doing? Just trying not to freak out about Star Wars. Oh my God. Will you give this woman a podcast? I love it. Oh, my God. It's so good.

Well, I'm just saying. I'm saying, Zach. You want me to come on the Star Wars podcast and just sort of help start? Like season nine, I'll come on and help start it. What if we could use our poll to get Mark Hamill to do the podcast of Star Wars? That would help out tremendously. He could get it started, right? He's a nice guy.

That would help out tremendously. He gets started, right? He's a nice guy. I also told him I'd deliver. My fanciest person I can deliver is Deborah Chow, who directed several Mandalorians. I offered that up. I don't know why they're not doing it. Donald's apparently too busy. I'm going to do this like this. I'll do it like this.

Here we go. Because I have no shame. Dave Filoni, if you're out there, and you're listening to Fake Doctors Real Friends, I'm trying to do it through the podcast to generate some positive energy. Is he on Twitter? Is Dave Filoni on Twitter?

Yeah, everybody. Everybody listening, we need you to blow up at Dave Filoni or whatever he is. Let's get his handle. Dave Filoni. Let's blow up Dave Filoni and Jon Favreau. Well, Jon Favreau is probably too busy to be reading your tweets But Filoni might have some time Dude you're so fucking this up

You're making it seem like one person is more important Than the other Jon Favreau created the whole series Oh they co-created it Listen man I don't know You're ruining everything He's ruining everything He're ruining everything. You're ruining everything. We don't have time to end. He's ruining everything. He's ruining everything, Joelle.

He's ruining everything. It's fine. We got it. We got it. It's in the bag. Listen, Joelle, Joelle, can you get me Dave Filoni's Twitter handle so we do this right? Look, the most important thing is that we figure out a way to start my Star Wars podcast. I'm very excited.

Bill, we wouldn't have anything to say. You'd have to have Henry come on and weigh in. I know, man. I would be in the dark. I'm in the dark about that. I'm in the dark about that. I'm in the dark about the game right now. If you guys can tell me, he should be playing it. He lives with this game called Destiny.

He's obsessed with it. Oh. Hell yeah. Yeah, that's it. I'm playing that right now. There you go. We're going to go to break, but first I'm going to give you Dave Filoni's Twitter handle, and you have to blow him up.

Everyone listening who's on Twitter. It is at FiloniBiloni. It is not. It is at Dave underscore Filoni. Filoni is F-I-L-O-N-I. So Dave underscore Filoni. Okay. Everyone listening who's on Twitter, blow him up and say,

will you please go on Donald Faison's Star Wars podcast? No. He's going to say yes. What would be even better is if you blow him up and say, will you please go on Donald Faison's Star Wars podcast? No, you know what? He's going to say yes. What would be even better is if you blow him up and you say, will you please make Donald Faison the star of one of your Star Wars shows? No, we're trying to. Wait, what?

Am I going too far? Start small. Am I going too far? Start small. Start small. All right, we're going to go to break. When we come back, we have a caller. We love you.

We'll be right back. Here's some music. Bring a little optimism into your life with The Bright Side, a new kind of daily podcast from Hello Sunshine. Hosted by me, Danielle Robay. And me, Simone Boyce. Every weekday, we're bringing you conversations about culture, the latest trends, inspiration, and so much more.

I am so excited about this podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart. Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side. All that sitting and swiping, our backs hurt, our eyeballs sting. That's our bodies adapting to our technology. But we can do something about it. We saw amazing effects. I really felt like the cloud in my brain

kind of dissipated. There's no turning back for me. Make 2024 the year you put your health before your inbox and take the Body Electric Challenge. Listen to Body Electric from NPR on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, my name's Jay Shetty, and I'm the host of On Purpose. I just had a great conversation with Michael B. Jordan, and you can listen to it right now. Michael is known for his performances in both film and television. in both film and television. His breakout role was in Fruitvale Station, playing Oscar Grant,

which earned him widespread praise and numerous award nominations. His portrayal of Killmonger in Marvel's Black Panther, one of my favorites, further solidified his status as one of Hollywood's leading actors, earning him widespread acclaim for his complex and compelling performance. In our conversation, Michael really opens up. You're going to love listening to it, and I can't wait for you complex and compelling performance. In our conversation, Michael really

opens up. You're going to love listening to it. And I can't wait for you to check it out. The closest to getting what you want is always the hardest. It's always the feeling when you're getting ready. You know, people give up right before they get what they always wanted to get. People quit. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Imagine you ask two people the same exact set of seven questions. I'm Minnie Driver, and this was the idea I set out to explore in my podcast, Minnie Questions. This year, we bring a whole new group of guests to answer the same seven questions, including actress and star of the mega hit sitcom Friends, Courtney Cox. You can't go

around it, so you just go through it. This is a roadblock. It's going to catch you down the road. Go through it. Deal with it. Comedian, writer, and star of the series Catastrophe, Rob Delaney. I shouldn't feel guilty about my son's death. He died of a brain tumor. It's part of what happens when your kid dies. Intellectually, you'll understand that it's not your fault, but you'll still feel guilty. Alt rock icon, Liz Phair. That personal disaster wrote Guyville. So everything comes out of a dead end. And many, many more. Join me on season three of Many Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Seven questions.

Limitless answers. Okay, let him in. Linus is coming. Hey, boys. Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Linus. How do you say your last name? Weich. Weich, right? Weich? Yeah, it's German. It's Wache. Wache. Give it up for Linus. Wache.

Is that the first time you've said a German last name in your Oprah voice, Donald? That is the first time I've ever done it, but I'm happy for Linus Wacker. That's not it. It's quite good. Pardon? Are you in Germany? I'm in Germany. I'm in Hamburg, Germany. What time is it there as we speak?

It's 11 in the evening. Okay. It's not that bad. Thank you for staying up late. Are you guys on lockdown right now? time is it there as we speak it's 11 in the evening okay oh it's not that bad you're just coming in thank you for staying up late you you uh you are you guys on lockdown right now uh yes we're back on lockdown do you know i was actually in i'm the only one of the six people here that was in i was in hamburg a year ago because my my daughter was performing there and i actually went around that city a little bit it's pretty pretty cool. I liked it man. it's kind of very cool there and the city itself seemed really

bustly at the time. I'm sure it's dead now. yeah it's dead now but it's good for partying though. that's why I was so excited that my daughter was spending time there, Linus. Thanks for that. You should definitely stop when you do your tour through Europe. We're going to. We're going to. We should come there. Are we big in Hamburg? Yeah, we're big in Hamburg.

In Germany, you're huge. We're very big in Germany, Dom. You didn't know that? You knew that, Dom. I'd just like to hear it every now and then. We're definitely going to be doing... Bill, you're going to come on the tour for some for some dates bill we can't hijack the whole tour i gotta bet but i have to be treated like a special special guest or yeah i think when we do major cities like you know like like hamburg yeah like a little bit when it's just casually said like hamburg yeah

when we do like bumblefuck, you're not going to come. But when we do like New York, Hamburg, L.A., Stodd, you're going to come. Stodd, not as big for me. So here's my question. We we because of Sarah Chalk, we put a lot of German on the show. A, did she speak it well? And B, did those guys we hired to be Germans speak it well? Because I didn't think they spoke it well and I thought she spoke it quite well. Sarah is doing well, but I think you mean the guys from this season,

right? Yeah. They were Finnish or something like that. They don't even speak quite German at all. Yeah, that was on Scrubs Wiki. They said that Sarah's German was better than the actors playing Germans. Yes. That's for sure. said that Sarah's German was better than the actors playing Germans. Yes, that's for sure.

I think Sarah's fluent. Yeah, Sarah's amazing. She has such a gift for language. I mean, she isn't just fluent. She like has the perfect accent in both with both French and German. Well, we made fun of Sarah a lot because coming out of a young American woman, it's not the most romantic, sexy language here. Anyways, in the United States.

And she would often say things in German that would sound aggressive and frightening to us when she's not that person at all. Yeah, it does sound aggressive. Yes, it's not necessarily... It's also because Sarah's eyes would get so big when she speaks German. Out of nowhere, she just gets like, it becomes cartoonishly big.

And she's like, guh-dee-da! Like, she gets real aggressive. Well, she would also, she was also usually switching from French, which was so sexy and slow. And then she'd be like, da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da, barking out. She was exaggerating for effect, let's be honest. I know, but she's a comedic genius. Linus, thank you for coming on the show. Do you have a question for me or Donald, your legendary bill lawrence we're so happy you're

here thanks for having me um yes i do have a question um i was wondering if you do a scene which is really emotional is it easy for you to switch the buttons and maybe you've been very angry or maybe you've been very sad? Is it easy for you to come back and be the normal you again? Because the background of this question is when you do fake laughing, I know, for instance, that you just get happy even with just faking the laugh. Is it the same when you have a very sad scene? That's a great question. That's a great question. I know somebody who had, when I was younger, I grew up in theater,

and so my parents used to make me have to sit and watch. And sometimes, and I would be backstage with a lot of the actors too, and so sometimes you would see things that you wouldn't necessarily that you shouldn't as a as a kid that you shouldn't necessarily see like i was i i got to see a person literally have a nervous breakdown because of the character he was playing on stage and the person had to go through this emotional journey on stage and when he got off a stage he couldn't turn it off and he had a breakdown and that's an emotional breakdown for me it's very difficult like I sometimes cry even after they say cut I'll continue to cry

unless I gotta go unless we gotta go again and then I try and stop it as hard as I can so I can get back to that moment again. Because once I've released everything, I it's hard for me to get back to that moment again. That's me personally. For me, every actor, I think, would probably answer the question differently. Some people can just turn on emotion really quickly. They're like, give me a second. And they're there. Other actors.

turn on emotion really quickly. They're like, give me a second. And they're there. Other actors, for me, it would be hard for me to be doing being super silly and then try and go switch and do an emotional scene. If I know I've got a big emotional scene, I kind of try and spend the day or at least the time on set in that space of seriousness or emotion, just because for me, it's almost impossible if we're all joking around and we're laughing and we're being like we are on this podcast and they're like, okay, we're rolling. Here we go. That's almost impossible if we're all joking around and we're laughing and we're being like we are on this podcast. And they're like, OK, we're rolling. Here we go. That's almost impossible for me. But there are actors who can do that and actually do it believably. But that's never been me.

I can do it believably at any time. I'm that good an actor. What? No. You know, I'll tell you something interesting that Zach and Donald might laugh at. So, Linus, these guys are amazing performers, and you stumbled onto the thing that made it very hard to sell the show in the first place, which was when I was off trying to sell Scrubs and describing it to different networks, the sheer amount of people that said, network presence, said, I'm not sure you can switch from broad silly fantasies

and people goofing around to really uh deeply emotional scenes with people facing you know death and and introspective and emotional pathos and i i was you know an idiot and i joked about it and would say like yeah i think you can i think you just turn down the lights and play an indie song and it'll work. And the truth was it only worked because the actors and actresses were able to do it. And if you're a fan of the show, I bet you can remember a moment that every single, of course, was acting Donald. But every actor and actress on the cast having a time that they had to switch gears immediately and be so emotional that you didn't usually see that in the comedy. So it worked because of the performers. I was talking to somebody randomly about this, that even watching Neil Flynn say Sarah Chalk's name, Elliot, when he tricked her into a date, you know, is such an

emotional moment, you know, and so real that even he could do it and the show would not have worked if donald zach sarah judy ken johnny c neil everybody uh were able to switch on a dime that also and also uh one other thing sometimes you're in the zone dude sometimes it's like any sports thing sometimes you come to work and you're some something's asked of you like that, to laugh, and then go into crying, and then come back into laughter again, and sometimes you can tap into that, no problem, and then sometimes you can't. That's just how it is.

That's the way it works. A very tricky thing as a director is that sometimes, so as you know, as everyone listening knows, a scene is comprised of many different shots. And an actor has an emotional scene. You have to know that if it's a big scene, they spent the better part of a day staying in that space, in that headspace. Often, let's say we're in the first shot. It's a very wide shot of the room and the actor is emotional and they cry.

let's say we're in the first shot, it's a very wide shot of the room and the actor is emotional and they cry. Well, now when I get to your close-up and it's seven o'clock at night and we've been doing it all day long and the actor's tears aren't flowing anymore, well, none of the other stuff will work because of continuity. It won't edit together. So it's a very tricky thing for both a director and an actor because you don't just have to do it once. You have to sort of sustain it for the whole scene. If the actor is indeed crying, they have to do it every single time. Otherwise, you know,

obviously there's moments where people swipe away their tears and you can use a shot like that. But there's been times where I've edited things and someone does something so beautiful and they cry and it was the master wide shot. And then you go in for close-up and they kind of like – that was what they had. They can't sort of muster it again. Well, you can't use that beautiful wide shot really anymore because it won't – it doesn't make any sense.

I have a question. How come you don't reverse engineer those scenes then and do them backwards? You can do, but that's a very good question. A lot of people save their A- a plus effort for the close stuff the smart the smart thing to do if you're someone who knows you only have so much gas in the tank is to is to wait until the camera's tight on you and that will make the most difference um do you guys remember on scrubs i would often cheat and i would cut short the master before you got to the heavy emotional stuff so you know you didn't have to do it.

Do you guys ever remember going through that? But I would just do, hey, the master only works till here and here. So it's stop. Yeah. Absolutely. Definitely. The other thing you can do is roll two cameras sometimes, one tight and one wide. But it's tricky.

And of course, worst case scenario. By the way, usually the worst case scenario is there's literally a menthol thing. They blow in your eyes and it makes them tear but now i my girlfriend and i were watching tv and we saw the first our first cgi tier we both stopped and we were like there's no way that's a real tear because it was so perfectly timed and beautiful and rolling down a cheek and we're like impossible and um and i was just on a job that has a lot of special effects on it and i turned to the guy go by the way i think i just saw my my first CGI tear going down a cheek. Is that a thing now? And he's like, oh, yeah, we're adding lots of tears.

I could use that. Hey, Linus, did you ask because you're a performer? It's an interesting question. No, I was just wondering. I'm just a student. Okay, cool. What do you do out in Hamburg, my friend? Yeah, I'm a study for

business administration. Okay. Is that where you're from? Are you from Hamburg, or is this just where you go to university? I'm from Hamburg, yes. Bill, this is not your audition to lead the podcast, okay? You've already got the job. Zach, I'm trying to interview someone. Okay.

By the way, very apropos so everybody knows as i said that zach got tangled up in his own almost collapsed zach had a beautiful jd moment and got tangled in his own headset cord all right linus it's time for everyone on earth's favorite moment of the podcast ready daniel with the cue. It's time to fix your life! How can we help you? All the way from Hollywood to Hamburg. We're going to send this Fix It.

It's kind of heavy. Oh, sure. Me and my long-term girlfriend, we just broke up. It was the first real love for both of us so i think something really special and i should mention that we just grew apart there was no bad blood at all i wish her the best but still it's quite hard. Of course, my friends and my family, they try to help me as good as they can because the pandemic is affecting all of us.

But I do still feel a little bit lost, if you can say that right now um yeah because you can't make any big plans at all you can't plan any vacations or go to the cinema or theater at the moment so it's quite a rough time and i would like to ask for an advice what i should do or how you get over your first real love heartbreak. I'm going to go first. I'm going to go first. The first thing I can tell you that I find is the most helpful thing, and not even related to your breakup, but to life right now, is that you are not alone. Everybody is going through, as we said on the podcast, as my mom used to tell me when I was a kid, if you weren't feeling these feelings, there'd be something wrong with you. This is such

a weird time. And so many people are, breakup aside, are dealing with, how do I get over this melancholia? How do I, I can't go to the movies. I can't even go hug my parents. So I think that there's comfort in knowing that you're not alone. So many people are going through this. And of course, a breakup makes it so much worse. I think a lot of people, I've read a lot of people are going through relationship problems because of course, it's so unnatural. All of a sudden sudden we're forced to

quarantine and everyone's stressed. And so we can all give you our best tips on getting over lost love. I think no matter what anyone has ever told me in a breakup, time has been the only thing. And you're going to hear that over and again, and it doesn't really help, but, but know that it, that it does. You will look back when you're in, when you're in your new relationship and you're newly excited and giddy and feeling so happy, you'll look back and go, oh my God, I can't believe this one's even better. I can't believe that I'm, that I, you know, thank, thank God that ended because even though it was sad at the time, it led me to this person who's so much better. So I know that that's that's that's that doesn't hurt help right now. But I think that's that's something you should at least have in your brain.

Now, there's a reason that all almost every small, a giant percentage of music is written about this topic is because it hurts so bad. And I was going to say, Zach, it's such a good point. By the way, Linus, part of the thing that's going to make this fun is at the end, and you don't have to do it out loud, but you're going to have to email us. You're going to have to say whose advice was the best. Mine's the best so far. By the way, only

Bill Lawrence, the most competitive mofo in the world, will turn giving Linus advice into a competition. Do you not see Linus smiling? He's enjoying this. Go ahead, boss. Fucking make it better. All right. So, Linus, don't feel weird about knowing that my advice is going to be the best.

No. Zach said something that's very smart, which is hard for me to say. Every show I've ever written has constant episodes about lost love and heartbreak because it's so universal and because it's the building block for who we are. Right. So, um, um, I will tell you, you know, these guys said is true. It's all a learning experience. It'll make you better and stronger for the next

relationship you enter in. But I'm going to say to you, the one thing that, uh, a friend of mine who's a shrink said to me recently, which is just remember that because of where we are as a quarantine and a pandemic, that none of this is a real playing field. None of this is real in terms of loneliness amplified by a thousand, depression amplified by a thousand, hopelessness amplified by a thousand. So the one piece of advice I'd give you, I'm a type of person that I need to have something to look forward to. And I call the real JD all the time to ask about where we are in the pandemic. And he's a guy that we all know. And he said, there's three vaccines, all with over 90% efficacy, all that are coming down the pipe. So even if you're a pessimist,

you're six months away from being in a real environment where none of these feelings will be amplified by a thousand. So all I would tell you is look for that light at the end of the tunnel, man, and this stuff will all seem a lot clearer. But it sucks. I'm sorry, dude. It sucks. And you know what?

The thing you can do, what can you do proactively? Reach out to friends. Don't become a hermit that's in their fetal position in your bed. Reach out to your friends. FaceTime with your friends. Going on national podcasts sometimes. Going on international podcasts is a huge help. I agree with Bill.

I like to give myself things to look forward to, even if it's little things. Like my girlfriend and I would be like, tonight we're getting sushi and we're going to eat a tub of ice cream. Even if it's stupid. Wait, you and your girlfriend do that? Don't be a dick. I'm saying he can do it. I mean, you'd just be a little bit sensitive, man. You're talking about... That's the type of thing that somebody that gives the third best advice

says. That's how I feel about it, too. I wish I could strike... You know when Homer squeezes Bart's neck? That's what I thought. i wish i could strike you know that you know that you know when homer squeezes uh bart's neck that's what i wish i could do to both of you lioness give your little give yourself things that are even if they're small that you know you'll look forward to and don't watch there's so much sad shit on tv like i we i got lost in a true crime wormhole watching like all this true crime and dark shit.

Find stuff that's funny and that will cheer you up. Maybe something British, Zach. Maybe something British. Maybe something with like an international – Like Ted Lasso, big hit, I'm sure. But scrubs or – I haven't gotten into Schitt's Creek, but people love that. Like something that just lifts your spirits and makes you laugh even if you're down. Or The Mandalorian. Or The Mandalorian. down also the Mandalorian or the Mandalorian.

Sure. The Mandalorian. Um, journal. And when I'm down, uh, journaling helps me just like, like we, you've heard me say this before,

like in college, we called it a brain drain and we just write just without taking the pen off the paper, everything you're thinking like in this and this and this. And even if a sentence is like, and I don't know what to write now, I don't know what to write now, but then you just keep writing and do that for like five minutes minimum. And even if a sentence is like, and I don't know what to write now, I don't know what to write now, but then you just keep writing

and do that for like five minutes minimum. And I will tell you, just so you know, God alone, I've seen, except Daniel, who I'm just getting to know, I've seen the other two guys

both heartbroken at different stages of their life. And I can't even revisit it because they're both so happy where they are now. And I promise you that they were both as heartbroken as you yourself are now. That's the best. By the way, you did win, Bill. You did win. You did win.

That's a great point. This man has helped me through and Donald through bad breakups in our life. And we were just where you're at. Dude, I got divorced while we were making scrubs. And now we're both in relationships that we've never been happier. One of the best parties I was ever at, Linus, and he'll tell you about it when he's on here,

was John McGinley announced to everybody on Scrubs at the beginning that he would never, ever, ever, ever, ever be in a committed relationship and get married ever again. And so I bet him $ ten thousand dollars in front of everybody that he would be married again before the end of the show and i didn't take the money from him but i used it to pay for his engagement party it could not have been more fun yeah yeah um all right so

you so you're welcome so you're welcome you're welcome and linus in the. In the meantime, you know what else you can do is you can go flirt. Flirt on the dating apps and on social media. Slide into them DMs. Slide into some DMs, Linus. By the way, we'll let you take a screenshot right now and you can slide into the DMs with this picture

and say, hey, I was on Fake Doctors Real Friends. This could be your slide into the DM flex. I was on Fake Doctors Real Friends. This could be your slide into DM Flex. I was on Fake Doctors Real Friends. I just grabbed my phone real quick. Linus just texted me Bill Donald Zach as the order of whose advice. That's right. That's actually what I would have said.

All right. Linus, you ready for your screenshot? Are you guys ready? Yeah. you all right so that's gonna help you you're gonna slide into your into the girls dms with that and and say um hey you may have heard me on the internationally successful podcast make sure you mention brown bear it always works out yeah also hey linus i bet you zach and donald do this too even though we can't guarantee it because it's crazy but uh if you find us on twitter and say hey it's linus i'm still in a shitty mood we'll say something to make you laugh yeah we'll cheer you

out we do that okay and don't forget to don't forget um when you listen to this podcast uh you'll know what it means but we also need you to tweet at at Dave Filoni to make sure that he comes on Donald's Star Wars podcast. Also, ask Dave Filoni to put me in the shows. Dude, you've got to focus. Donald! You can't have everything you want now.

You've got the advice of one of the most successful TV producers right here. He's telling you how to fucking do it. Okay, I'm sorry. Linus wants to say one more thing. Can I say something real quick I just want to thank all of you

like Dan Joel and of course the three of us for doing the podcast and doing the TV show it was our

family's Sunday evening tradition my both sisters of mine and my parents we always watched Scrubs all together

and it's just our favorite tv show i'm really thank you thank you appreciate it thank you hey man that means more to me than you know dude that's really cool thank you so much and i would like to give a shout out to my older sister she's listening to this one as well but she doesn't know that I'm on today. She will be surprised. There you go. To my good friend Julian, he's also a huge Scrubs fan. What's up, Julian? We're always quoting from Scrubs and using

the show for inside jokes. I want to know, Linus, right off the top of your head without giving too much thought, what's one of your favorite quotes? I know what it is. I can't. I know what it is. I can't. I know what it is, Linus, because of Julian. Is there a manatee under there?

Is there some sort of underground tunnel system? I think I saw a manatee. Was his name Julian? I don't know. We didn't exchange pleasantries. That's Julian. That's Julian. Alright, brother, we gotta go. There's so many. Thank you, guys. Happy Thanksgiving for you tomorrow. Happy Thanksgiving to go. There's so many. Thank you, guys. Good luck. Happy Thanksgiving for you tomorrow.

Happy Thanksgiving to you. Thank you very much. Thank you. Take care. Be well. Bring a little optimism into your life with The Bright Side, a new kind of daily podcast from Hello Sunshine. Hosted by me, Danielle Robay. And me, Simone Boyce.

Every weekday, we're bringing you conversations about culture, the latest trends, inspiration, and so much more. I am so excited about this podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart. Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side. All that sitting and swiping, our backs hurt, our eyeballs sting. That's our bodies adapting to our technology.

But we can do something about it. We saw amazing effects. I really felt like the cloud in my brain kind of dissipated. There's no turning back for me. Make 2024 the year you put your health before your inbox. And take the Body Electric Challenge. the year you put your health before your inbox and take the Body Electric Challenge. Listen to Body Electric from NPR on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hey, my name is Jay Shetty and I'm the host of On Purpose. I just had a great conversation with Michael B. Jordan and you can listen to it right now. Michael is known for his performances in both film and television. His breakout role was in Fruitvale Station, playing Oscar Grant, which earned him widespread praise and numerous award nominations. His portrayal of Killmonger in Marvel's Black Panther, one of my favorites, further solidified his status as one of Hollywood's leading actors, earning him widespread acclaim for his complex and compelling performance. In our conversation, Michael really opens up. You're going to love listening to it,

and I can't wait for you to check it out. The closest to getting what you want is always the hardest. It's always the feeling when you're getting ready. People give up right before they get what they've always wanted to get. People quit. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Imagine you ask two people the same exact set of seven questions. I'm Minnie Driver, and this was the idea I set out to explore in my podcast, Minnie Questions. This year, we bring a whole new group of guests to answer the same seven questions, including actress and star of the mega hit sitcom Friends, Courtney Cox. You can't go around it, so you just go through it. This is a roadblock. It's going to catch you down the road. Go through it. Deal with it.

Comedian, writer, and star of the series Catastrophe, Rob Delaney. I shouldn't feel guilty about my son's death. He died of a brain tumor. It's part of what happens when your kid dies. Intellectually, you'll understand that it's not your fault, but you'll still feel guilty. Alt-rock icon Liz Phair. That personal disaster wrote Guyville. So everything comes out of a dead end. And many, many more. Join me on season three of Many Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. Hamburg is a rock star city. It was so fun there. The food was great. I feel bad for him, though, because going through a breakup during quarantine and COVID and everyone's sort of – No, I know. I know he's going to be fine, dude.

But, you know, we've all been there. Imagine doing it during – I mean, I'm sure a lot of people listening are going through it during quarantine, a breakup. And it's like a double punch to the face. quarantine a breakup and it's like a double punch to the face um hey i got another i got another good uh um uh news break for you because then you two can decide so everybody's really busy a lot of charities have nicely asked if um and everybody's been doing different charitable stuff which i think is cool and awesome but a couple charities nicely asked if we would ever do it scrubs table read you guys want me to try and rally the troops? Yeah, we'll do it.

Sure, let's do it. What script would we read? I don't know. Look, I do know it has to be one with my wife in it, or I'm not going to be allowed to do it. Okay. Now you're down. Oh, Bill, while we have you on the spot.

Yeah. Can you help us get Mike Fox for one of his episodes? Yeah, you know what? he's promoting a book tell him this has a huge audience and we'll promote his book let me email mike today uh he's such a um man he's such a lovely dude and i had to do some stuff for his book you know just because i'm invent some stuff because a couple chapters on our spin city days and start and by the way this new book has a couple chapters on his scrubs guest appearance i mean well he's got two episodes uh coming up it's 3 12 and 3 13 and we would love to have him if you can pull any strings if if i if if i make it happen i expect i want to deal right now you say mike welcome to our and bill's podcast

you got even if i'm not on it you got it you got it i'll i'll say i'll now you say mike welcome to r and bill's podcast even if i'm not on it you got it you got it i'll i'll say i'll literally to get mike fox i would say whatever you want me to say it would be such an honor and and i and i know it's just semi-convenient because he's promoting a book and this has an enormous audience that is he's a he's a look there's it's weird to say we're like this we're not you know too self-involved um and it's weird to say, we're like this. We're not too self-involved. And it's weird. They like an act. I don't know.

But I am too. But I didn't mean anything that I said. But he's an actor that I truly think is an American icon and a hero for all the stuff he's been doing. He's such a great dude. We would have to make it like a two-hour episode because we would just be like, fuck scrubs, dude. Let's just talk about every single thing. I would talk about back to the future for like an hour and a half i'd talk about how eric stoltz had the freaking you know i mean i wouldn't do that right now me doing me

saying that right now he's probably like i'm not going on the show so let me not i'm not i wouldn't do that i wouldn't do that imagine this because you guys went through it the only way he could do back to the future was to shoot it concurrently with family ties so he would shoot back to the future at night and family ties during the day which is banana pants yes but he but he he he did most of the season from what i remember he did most of the season for family ties because he was the original choice that uh zemeckis wanted for back to the future but he couldn't do it because he was doing family ties and then when stoltz fell out uh at the when stoltz fell out and they knew they were getting him back it was because of your old mentor gary goldberg said it happened and he was friends with

those guys yeah yeah all right well bill will you please try are you writing it on a post-it because you're gonna forget i'm just gonna do it'm just going to do it and I'll have it. All right. Yeah. Okay. Are you fake writing it on a post? I didn't have for all. I know you're fake writing it.

Are you fake writing right now? All right. No, I just wrote Mike Fox email. I own an email anyways, man. I miss that guy. Thank you.

All right. Let's, let's finish the app because we've gone an hour and a half and, and we have, okay. I would just want to say shout out Mike star, uh, who was on this, who was in this episode. All right, let's finish the ep because we've gone an hour and a half. And we have some funny things. Okay, I just want to say shout out to Mike Starr, who was in this episode. He was the patient that Johnny had. When I first got clueless, me and Justin Walker were flying to L.A.

And we were in first class. And I just remember waking up and Mike Starr was handing me bagels and he was one of the first people I met before I got to Hollywood we never you know we talked about hanging out because we were going to do the movie Clueless

and somehow Justin had who played Christian in the movie had struck up a conversation with him and told him that we were in this television show so I woke up and he's like hey kid do you want a bagel and i was like absolutely i want a bagel holy shit you're the guy from dumb and dumber you know and uh i don't even think dumb and yeah dumb and dumber had come out already so i i uh he's a really good character actor yeah he's one of the best he's been in so many things and he's such a talented actor. And I forgot that he was on scrubs.

And so I just want to give him a big shout out and a hello, Mike star. Cause it was a pleasure to see you on scrubs. And I don't know why, but you guys made me watch this episode and any episode that has Sam Lloyd being sweet in it, both makes me sad and miss him, but he was so sweet in this episode.

I know. I know. I didn't. Yeah. Yeah, he was so funny in this episode. So we have the 38-year-old virgin. And we talked about that a bit. But it's funny when Sarah is so fucking funny in this episode.

She goes, I'm a virgin. And Sarah goes, me too. Sorry, that's a reflex from college when I used to play tambourine in a Christian rock band. Dude, the writing and delivery of Elliot in this episode is so fucking funny. Then she does her O-face. We get a glimpse of what Elliot looks like

when she's having an orgasm. And she said The three people in her high school Because that picture got out They posed like that for their yearbook photos Oh man, I love watching this show I literally wrote down Sarah's so funny Don't you guys love that?

To watch this show again For me, I'm old enough to have forgotten it now It's so fun Of's so funny don't you guys love that to watch this show again when for me i'm old enough to have forgotten it now it's so fun of course we don't remember at all and i and donald and i've said multiple times that we that we we knew sarah was funny in particular when we were doing it but in watching it back this many years later i'm i just am really appreciating how fucking hilarious of a comedic actor she is not just that not just that but bill i'm gonna be you know the story johnny c's storyline is so necessary like i i used to think that zach sarah and i that's the go-to johnny's the go-to man johnny's life is my life now pretty much you know what i mean? Like everything that Johnny goes through

in this episode, Cox goes through in this series, like I'm going through now. And so I relate to his character more than I relate to the character I played on the show. That's the crazy thing, man. It's like life has changed so much.

So when re-watching it now, it's like I was so caught up in what we were doing because I thought we were the hip kids and stuff like that. Johnny's story is really, it's like I was so caught up in what we were doing because I thought we were the hip kids and stuff like that. Johnny's story is really it really does carry a lot. It's a sad for me is that I identify with Ken sometimes. It's hard because it's hard to be a boss.

And my favorite episodes involving Ken Jenkins were when he made you know that it's hard to be a boss and that he's probably a sweet guy underneath all that crap. You know, was it like that when you were writing it or is it like that now as you like that now, man, when I look at, you know, I'm like,

man, I'm an old crusty dude that people sometimes think is a, you know, closed off control freak at work. And I'm like, it's tough to be a boss. Sometimes it is. What was me?

Whatever. I laughed out loud at powerful tiny fists. Powerful tiny fists. Yes. It's like powerful tiny fists. Yeah, come back from a fantasy when Randall has punched me in the nuts for a second time.

I really liked that song spreading around and saving Ted. That was great. I was a little upset that Kelso was bummed out by it. Yeah. That kind of struck me when he called him a chicken. Yeah. I wrote down that Kelso is kind of evil.

Well, the Cavalier attitude towards that, you know, it's our favorite jokes to write. And I thought that was one that was a mistake. We're one that walked that line between inappropriate and okay. And Ted was obviously somebody depressed and maybe I'm hypersensitive to it now. Like, but I love the joke. I don't know if you guys remember our favorite joke on was in Sam's briefcase.

All he had was his briefcase. All he had was his briefcase. All he had was a, a button with a happy face and a loaded revolver. And one's in case I get sad and the other's in case I get real sad. And I'm like, that is at least clever enough. Is that in the show? I didn't know that was in the show.

Oh, my God. I don't think we would do... Oh, my God. I don't think we would... You would likely do some of these more cavalier suicide jokes today. I mean, Kelso, we wanted to have him have a little bit of heart.

No, I would not. Right now, he calls him a chicken for not jumping. Yeah, we... It was the jump guy who... Look, you guys probably do this with your performances. When I watch these shows, the painful part is you watch it, the things that you would never do now. Yeah.

I would make a lot of that stuff. Yeah. All right, let's switch topics. JCM, Johnny C. McGinley, is fucking ripped in the gym. Ripped. I said that shit myself. I mean, I know he listens while he's working out. So, Johnny, keep going, man.

You look like a stud in this episode, Johnny. You look beefy. That's so... You know what? He knows. You don't need to make him feel better about it. Donald, you go, I don't disdain you. I dane you.

I dane you. That's a funny T-shirt. Scott Rabideau in the background now a funny my stand in scott rabidu is in the background of the gym bill am i correct in that you you uh you had these set dressers production designers build the gym set and then told them to leave it up so we would have a gym yeah then we moved it down it's a way to get a gym for the because we lived in that stupid hospital for the crew staff actors whatever we all would be any previous any previous gym scenes were in a small room this was the first time bill said no let's move the gym to the basement and make it big and then also leave all the shit in there yeah let's charge dis Disney for cleaning up the basement, putting a ton of gym equipment in there, maybe a stereo system of some kind.

Right. And then say we plan to use that set a lot, and then we can all exercise in between lunch breaks and when we're sitting around doing that. I would even work out there when we were dark, when we weren't working. It was the closest nice gym to me. It's one of the best completely 100% free gyms in Los Angeles. Yeah, the best free gym that you'll be alone in in Los Angeles. Todd with his giant green balls in the gym was funny. Sure.

I think that was a Maschio ad lib once he saw the props that were available to him. I'm sure it was. So moving in is a big topic in this episode. JD's very worried that Danny is slow. Everyone's teasing him, and he's also concerned that she's slowly going to try and move in. That's always weird, right? When you're in a relationship and you're kind of dancing around, they start with a toothbrush, and then there's a few things, and then there's the conversation like well why am i paying rent it's like you know and there's that little dance i didn't i had a

completely different experience than you had obviously when it comes to moving in i was tricked by my wife my wife told me my wife told me she was never going to get married. She didn't want to get married and she didn't want to have kids. And she was an independent woman and she would always live on her own. And I was like, Oh shit. Well, let's start dating.

That's the type of woman I want to date. Right. I like that. Yeah. I, it is a true story. My wife, you guys both know that my wife beats me in every, um,

couple battle, every mental battle, every, you know, she decides what I do. She didn't charge everything in my life. The only victory I ever had was when I left New York because I fell in love with her and I was running a show in New York, Spin City, and I realized and she had to work. She was in L.A., you know, on the Duke Carey show. I'm like, man, if I don't move to LA, you can't do that long distance thing for years. I can't, you know, this relationship's going to end. So I moved to LA. I said, I'm moving back to LA. And Krista said, you know,

you're not moving in with me. And I'm like, Oh, cool. Whatever. And when I came and visited once, she showed me this cool house she was building up in Nichols Canyon. I remember going, Oh, this is going to be a perfect place for me to live. So, but she's like, you're not moving in with me. And then I told her, I'm like, no, I don't want to, I'm going to rent kind of like a party place at the beach in Malibu.

And she's like, by yourself, you know, I'm like, no, I'm going to do it with Rob Mascio. He was a friend of mine. It gets better. And I saw Rob Mascio like two nights after that. I go, hey, I told Krista Miller, this woman I'm dating, that you and I are getting, when I moved back to LA, that you and I are getting a house on the beach in Malibu that I'm paying for, but we're going to live together and have lots of parties. He goes, are we? I said, no. I said, we're not at all, but you have to know that we are in case you see her. And, uh, and then when I got to LA, she's like, you shouldn't have a party house at the beach. You should just crash here in my new house. I was like, all right, my only victory.

Is that the house where we did the table read at? That's the house you did the table read at. That's my only victory. Is that the house we did the table read at? That's the house you did the table read at. That's my only victory as an adult male with my now wife of 20-some-odd years. She built that house? Yeah. I thought I had one when my wife had said that to me, that she didn't want to have kids or get married or live together, and she was an independent woman.

But I found myself begging her two years later, please just let me live live let's just live together why can't we live together i don't understand why you're not living here like she played me like a fiddle yeah man you're not because by the way when chris is on here again and she will be i'm sure she'll tell you the reality of the story i told and why it was all plotted and planned yeah oh she played you like oh got know, I'm sure. I felt like it's my only victory. Don't get me wrong. When we lived there, I was like, hey, I have a favorite couch.

Nope, I have a favorite chair. Nuh-uh. I'm like, what about this fork? Can I bring this fork to our new house? No, those forks don't work. I'm like, all right. That's always funny, too, when you move in with your girl or your guy, and all of a sudden, if you're the person whose house it is,

and they start going, so what's the deal with that painting? And you're like, that masterpiece? Yeah. So where else could that go? Is that something that can go in your office if you have an office? Could that go there? What? Yeah, that's always tough. I was still building, renovating my house when Florence and I started dating.

And she was so tactfully way in on things. I mean, granted, she clearly knew it was a sensitive thing. And she'd be like, is that the tile for the bathroom? I'd be like, yeah, yeah. Yeah, why you don't like it? And she'd be like, no, no, no. No, it's great. Great.

Right. Right. So passive aggressive i moved into krista's house and we got engaged like seven months later it's true story and as a gift she turned an extra room in that house into an office for me for about two months and then she's like i'm pregnant and the very same workers that had gone in and put office stuff in there came in 60 days later and ripped it out and turned it into a nursery. Did you write Scrubs in that office?

I didn't. I didn't have it long enough, man. It reminds me of one of my favorite movies, Rooster's Millions. Great movie. I love Rooster's millions that movie should be remade but i don't know if you i mean john cannon richard pryor you can't touch him touch gold no i mean i love one of the funny parts i love about is that he's trying to waste money

and he keeps renovating his office with they keep redoing it and redoing it and redoing it because he's just like this is the best way to waste money. And then finally, in the end, sorry, mild spoiler. She goes, is this it? Have I finally achieved your dream? He goes, this is it. This is a room I could die in. And she exhales. And she goes, all right, boys, take it all away.

Because they're broke. Like 20 guys come in and take everything away. Just take it away. Such a great movie, man. Great movie. You should watch that if you haven't. Do you need a certified check? Do you need a receipt?

That's the last line. I love Richard Pryor movies. The Toy was another favorite movie of mine when I was a kid. That movie has a lot of social issues. By the way, this is part of the fun for me. It's not old enough, but part of the fun is taking your kids zach through these movies we did a dirty rotten scoundrels with henry last night oh that's great you got to show him the toy bill although he'll be like jackie gleason richard prior it's awesome he'll be like i already lived

this life well i understand the fantasy of the point how dare you what are you saying that henry has a toy black man living in his house? No, I'm saying he has a wealthy father. That's all. But his father in that movie doesn't take care of him, though. Okay. It was a fucking joke. Ask next.

Pretty bad joke, dick lips. Dick lips? Dick lips. You're saying my lips look like two dicks? Your lips look like a dick's mouth. Remember E.T. when he says penis breath? I didn't know as a child that was, first of all, a pretty racy joke

for E.T. He's saying that his brother's mouth... E.T. says penis breath in E.T.? No, Elliot says to his brother... His brother didn't like that penis breath! Right, now he's saying that his... Penis breath. He's saying that his brother had a penis in his mouth.

Otherwise, why would he have penis breath? Um, I didn't really understand that as a child. And also I didn't know if it was penis breath or penis bread as a child. I was like, why is he calling them penis bread? Oh my God.

I can probably go for a piece of penis spread right now. I could eat some spotted dick pudding. That shit is good. No lies. No lies. I could eat some spotted dick bread That shit is good No lies Penis bread with a little bit of butter Yeah I think we got it Wait one last thing One last thing

You're benching 90 times 2 Which is 180 Plus the bar is 45 590 225 are you really 590. 225. Are you really benching that? 225 or is that fake weights?

I think we could get that up. I don't think, I don't, I think we could get that up. No, back in, back in the episode, were they fake weights or were you fucking. Well, NBA. You're throwing up 225. Let me just say this. NBA players would have to bench 185 at the Columbine if I'm correct, right? And that's a plate on each side and a bar. Am I correct?

Yeah, I can do that. Right. I'm asking you in this episode, your character is benching 225. How many more plates do you gotta add on to make that 225? Just did the math for you, Donald. Just did the math for you. Your character is benching 225 in this episode. I wanna know if you

remember if their weights were real or fake. No, them shits was fake. Come on, man. Oh, okay. I was just waiting. I was to know if you remember if their weights were real or fake. No, them shits was fake. Come on, man. Oh, okay. I was just waiting. I was like, why don't we just cut to the end when Donald says they're fake? Alright, that's our show, everybody. We love you very much. Thank you,

William, for coming on. I love you guys. It makes me happy to see Daniel. It makes me happy to see Joelle. It makes me happy to see Donald and always makes me happy to see you, Zach. Have a lovely holiday, everybody. When you guys hear this, Thanksgiving will be over, but we are going to be coming to you every week now, and even in discussions to get back to two a week,

we're going to figure that out. We have a new idea. It's going to be exciting. And Mike Fox News, either way, will be coming next episode. Okay, Zach? Yes, let us know on Mike Fox either way. And thank you. Hey, we know on Mike Fox either way. And, uh, and thank you. Hey, we know it's a tough out there.

A lot of people are down and just know that these five people care about you and love you and want you to be safe and healthy and happy. And, um, and that's it. Donald, why don't you count us in? I'm going to let Bill count us in. Okay. Bill, since you love to do it. No, I only do it when people don't want me to. Okay.

Well, Bill, if that's the case, then we don't want you to. Don't you dare, Bill. Don't you dare. Six, seven, eight. that we all should know. So gather round to hear our, gather round to hear our Scratch Reboot Show with Zach and Donald. Mm-hmm. Bring a little optimism into your life

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