Fake Doctors, Real Friends with Zach and Donald - 409: My Malpractical Decision

Episode Date: February 25, 2021

On this week's episode, Doug find his calling in the morgue. In the real world, Zach reveals the identity of his first sexual partner. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Bring a little optimism into your life with The Bright Side, a new kind of daily podcast from Hello Sunshine, hosted by me, Danielle Robay, and me, Simone Boyce. Every weekday, we're bringing you conversations about culture, the latest trends, inspiration, and so much more. I am so excited about this podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart. Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side. I'm Raquel Willis.

Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles, a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words. This season, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states. We will always exist and we will definitely not let them take away our joy, no matter how hard

they try. Listen to Queer Chronicles on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your most fabulous shows. Hi, this is Shannon Doherty, host of the new podcast, Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty. So in this podcast, I'm going to be talking about marriage, divorce, my family, my career. I'm also going to be talking a lot about cancer, the ups and the downs, everything that I've learned from it. It's going to be a wild ride. So listen to Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Hey, it's Alec Baldwin.

This past season on my podcast, Here's the Thing, I spoke with more actors, musicians, policymakers, and so many other fascinating people, like jazz bassist Christian McBride. Jazz is based on improvisation, but there's very much a form to it. You have a conversation based on that melody and those chord changes. So it's kind of like giving someone a topic and say, OK, talk about this. Listen to the new season of Here's the Thing on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Donald, you're lucky. It doesn't work. What? It does work. It's going to work. It works in our little setup call, but, like, I have an insane amount of static, and I changed the cable. I don't know, Dan.

We'll do another session. You might have to come over. I might bring know, Dan. We'll do another session. You might have to come over. I might bring you another cable and try the whole thing manually. You might have to come over and give me some tech support. All right, guys. I'm back.

Let's have eyes to me. How did your Star Wars session go? It was great. We had a great talk about The Empire Strikes Back. It went really well well that's your favorite one about to tweet about it it's the best one once we have a conversation about that too yeah i think we're finding a good groove i like it i can't wait to release it to the world i think well i'm sure

people love it and when is the release of plan may the fourth be with you of course may the fourth be with you guys Always That's so exciting I'm bummed that your thing doesn't work But I'm so happy that it doesn't work Because I have a feeling it would have stole the episode Well I feel like you're hating on something That I was very excited about I'm not hating on it

I think it's going to work one day I think you have a lot of I'm sensing negativity towards the sound pad I'm sensing negativity towards the sound pad. I have no negativity towards the sound pad. I have zero negativity towards the sound pad. I have very good self-control, mind you. I know you do. Yeah, because I will not abuse the sound pad.

I don't think you would. By the way, I turned it. You know, Daniel has it set up so there's sound effects on it but you can turn it and then there's like a zillion drum kits and sound effects and you can just like dude you would love it for for jazz lettuce you just jam out and like make your own beats i love jamming out on jazz lettuce yeah can you play drums jazz lettuce yeah can you play drums no but one of your brothers can right everyone in my family can play the drums except for me i think even casey can play the drums i cannot well on my life to-do list i i post on instagram i i know like two beats from when i took some lessons um in high

school but uh and somebody of course wrote on instagram like oh i used to work it like uh sam ash and that's the one beat everyone can play and i had to hear it over and over again yeah sure you know what you should have wrote back to him eat a bag of dicks eat a baker's dozen of girthy cock that just doesn't sound appetizing at all. You know that gif of the girl getting hot dogs thrown at her face? I love that. I love that gif.

Yeah. So anyway, one of my life goals, one of my to-do list, bucket list items is to play the drums. I just have to get an electric kit because I don't want my neighbors to hate me. I have a pretty quiet neighborhood, and if I got a real drum set, I would feel bad. All right. So, yes, how are you? I'm great.

We're going to get into this episode, and I want to talk about a lot of things. Okay. I'm going to say this before we start. Not my favorite episode. Yeah, kind of meh. I mean, we're coming off the high of of the last one which was incredible but we pulled out all the stops

you know we got a really dynamite co-star yes cal turk is in this cal turk is in this and the infamous call tur hotline the call tur hotline you know know, I just gotta be honest with you. Yeah. Not my favorite episode though. Yeah, I mean, it's got a few things in it, but it's not great. And I think we can't help but judge it by the fact that we just came off an episode that we both said was our favorite. I actually had dinner with Bill

and I was sitting there cracking up with him, like recounting jokes that I didn't know if he remembered. And we were just sitting there laughing just from that episode. I had him dying with that guy. What'd you guys have dinner at? We went to an outdoor restaurant. How was it?

Don't judge me. I went to an outdoor restaurant. Nobody's judging anybody. Don't outdoor eat shame me. Nobody's shaming anybody. The numbers are dropping. People are getting vaccinated all around America. We have reached a milestone, though.

We did reach the 500,000 milestone, people dead in the U.S., which is very unfortunate. But as of right now, numbers are going down, and we'll see what's up. We'll see what's going to happen. Ain't nobody going to shame you for going i did go to an outdoor restaurant and i i i had dinner with uh with billiam and um i made him laugh recounting jokes from that episode what kind of food um i had a salmon with some pesto sauce kind of thing i have to say i listened to another podcast today while I was exercising. Boo. What? And I got to say, it wasn't, it was boring. So why did you listen to it?

Because my friend told me that they discussed something I would find interesting. And I thought, okay, I'm going to give it a shot. And I was bored. And I thought, this is, when I listen, I know, obviously I'm biased. But when I listen to our podcast, it's, I'm laughing. And it's so silly. And I thought, when I listen, I know obviously I'm biased, but when I listen to our podcast, I'm laughing. And it's so silly. And they were so serious.

I wanted to be like, guys, lighten up. Be funny. Casey told me we were number one today. We're number one on iHeart's podcast. We're the number one podcast. Actually, last week. Let's go. That's what it was.

Of iHeart's podcast, iHeart has many popular podcasts and one of their top ones is Stuff You Should Know That's the title of it, Stuff You Should Know You can guess what the show's about and we are number one

of all of their podcasts Bullshit Bull True Bull True true i'll show you yeah i know but my wife be posting things and then be like maybe i shouldn't have posted that is it true no you know what i'm gonna i'm just gonna say something the algorithm on apple itunes that ranks podcasts is really bizarre i don't really understand it because we're not always so high on that but we know we're doing really well just because we have the inside scoop. And Will, our overlord at iHeart, says there's some wacky algorithm. I don't know what to tell you. Well,

I can tell you that stuff you should know is often in the top of the Apple podcast rankings, and you're doing more than them. So I don't know what goes into their wacky algorithm of what rates podcast. Well, it's a mystery. I'm still trying. Maybe Apple's hating on it. Maybe Apple's hating. I feel like there's some intern who's like,

yeah, those guys. Yeah. But you know what? I hated scrubs when it was on dude. Speaking of hating on scrubs, dude, when I remember,

I used to buy all of this camera equipment from a store in Hollywood. It's closed down now. But I used to buy all of this stuff, like, for my stop motion animation. And one day, I go to the place, and I'm buying stuff, and I'm spending all of this money. And the cash register says, do you have a code? And I give him my code. And he clicks it in. And on the screen, it said, Scrubs sucks.

Wow. And I was like. Wow. What? I was like, that's. That's very intense. That's. So someone that worked there had put that into the computer?

Whenever my code was typed in, it would say, Scrubs sucks. And I was like, wow. Who works here? Who would one of your people works here that would do something that stupid and then you for showing me this and he was like i know i was about to say man i i have no idea i was like if you want to you can uh get your manager but you're gonna take all this shit off my credit card now. He was like, no. You didn't buy it there. Hell no. Eat a dick, dude.

Scrub sucks. Eat a bag, a baker's dozen of girthy cock. If you can't say it to my face, then you really shouldn't be saying it. You know what I mean? That's how it goes. True. That's really how it goes. Yeah. I remember watching the Emmys one year, and Seth MacFarlane, I think, was the host.

And we weren't nominated. It was just a normal year. And it opens with a song, the Emmys did, sung by his Family Guy character. I forgot which one of them, maybe all of them. And I'm like, oh, okay, this is cute. And it's sort of, you know, like Seth MacFarlane would, he's sort of roasting the shows with this opening number. And I'm like, oh, this is cute.

And then it gets to a line that's like, and on NBC we have the lovable Zach Braff, who reminds us that a sitcom doesn't have to make us laugh. Yeah, but he's a hater, dude. I know. That was rough, though. I was sitting there, I was like eating my popcorn,

like, wait, what? He's a hater, dude. It's all good, though, man. You know, that's just how it goes. There are a lot of, that's the funny thing. There are a lot of haters out there who feel like, you know.

I don't mind getting, I don't mind getting roasted, you know, like by a comedian. I mean, I can handle that. But I agree. I don't think Seth MacFarlane ever really liked us. I mean, he did the white scrubs, black scrubs thing, which was fine. I thought it was, that didn't bother me. But he definitely took a lot of digs at us. Oh, absolutely.

He said he didn't think it was a funny show. He didn't think we were a funny show. Literally. Oh, absolutely. He said he didn't think it was a funny show. He didn't think we were a funny show, literally. I think in one of those street interviews and stuff like that, asking people on the street, do you think, yes, Scrubs was a funny show, and somebody said, yeah. And he's like, oh, you do? I just don't. Some shit like that. I don't know if I'm right. That's an Ask Bill question. Well, I don't care to ask Bill. We don't have to keep talking about Mr. McFarl um but hey should we talk about but i love family guy i'm not gonna lie i laugh at family guy hardcore i've never watched i mean i've seen clips from family but i've never been a regular watcher wait what i'm not a teenager or a huge pothead. Inappropriate response. You know, Garrett and Neil wrote on Family Guy

also. I know. I know. I know the humor. I'm sure I know a lot of people love it. It's just not my jam. That's what's up. That's what's up. Should we get into the show? I wish I could use my bong in that. Yes so why don't

you count us in baby girl five six seven eight stories about a show we made about a bunch of doctors and nurses and a janitor who loved to hate i said he's got stories that we all should know so gather around to hear our gather around to hear our I like when you go Shamar Moore on me. I do like it when you Shamar Moore me sometimes. I don't know who Shamar Moore is. But speaking of baby girls, I got to say, your wife and why? Why are you hitting your forehead? Is it a famous person i should know well i mean

you're using his tagline you're using his what you're talking about willis he's famous for making baby girl famous okay well i don't know i don't know who is he a singer i'm being educated now as well as he's an actor he was on the young and the restless for the longest right then he went on to host soul train and now he's and then he went on to be he Train, and now he's... And then he went on to be... He was on a show on CBS, and then he left the show, and now he is on SWAT. He's the star of his own show on SWAT. He's one of the most handsome men

on the planet, dude. You cannot deny... You cannot deny his handsomeness at all. By the way, did you see SNL this week? It was funny, dude. Loco.

Loco. He don't know that name. Loco. Are you talking about the video they made with that woman? I don't know her name yet, but she's very funny. And that video was amazing. That was like the best thing on SNL in the whole episode. I thought it was great. Hilarious. Loco. the best thing on SNL, like the whole episode.

I thought it was great. Hilarious. Loco. And the way it was shot, whoever directed it and shot it, did a great job. You don't know that, Loco.

It was very funny. Will you look up her name for me, Joelle? I want to give her a shout out. She's funny. And that, and I, and if you're listening to this and you know,

Ego Nodum. What's her name? Ego Nodum. Oh, Ego. Yeah. Well, she's the star. Shout out Ego Nodum. What's her name? Ego Nodum. Oh, Ego. Yeah. Well, she's the star. Shout out Ego Nodum.

She's the star of a very funny SNL video this week. And I don't know, whoever directed it. Well, she's always funny on the show, too. She's always representing on the show. Well, whoever directed that video, if you know them, if you're friends with them, tell them that I thought it was incredibly well made. He don't know that I'm loco.

Do you guys know what we're talking about? Did you see it? I did not. I'm looking it up now. It features Bad Bunny, so that's pretty cool. By the way, then the song came on. Now, I don't know anything about Bad Bunny or the female singer. What's her name?

I don't know who the female singer was. Ego Notum? Ellen? No, no, no. Oh, you're talking about the musical guest. The musical guest, Joelle. Will you look up the name? It was Bad Bunny.

Bad Bunny. Bad Bunny with a guest. I think she's a famous flamenco singer or something. And it was amazing. It was in Spanish. I didn't's a famous flamenco singer or something. And it was amazing. It was in Spanish. I didn't understand a word of it. Oh, Rosalia. Yeah, Rosalia.

You guys, if you're listening to this, I'm telling you, watch two things from this week's, or I don't know when this airs. When does this air? Thursday. Thursday. All right, from last Saturday's. Watch last Saturday's, yeah. Watch last Saturday's SNL. Two things.

The loco video and watch the first musical performance. Both of them were amazing. I mean, I don't always watch the whole musical act, to be honest. I sometimes get a flavor of it and then skip to the sketches. Sure.

Unless I really know and love the artist. But Bad Bunny and Rosalia, is that her name? Rosalia. It was amazing. It was amazing. Yeah. I didn't know that Bad Bunny was a Hispanic.

Or do I say Latinx, Joelle? I'm so confused. I believe he's from Latin America, so we can say Latinx. I didn't know that he was a Latinx rapper. I just heard his name a lot. I didn't know that. Yeah, Bad Bunny is very popular popular one of the more popular uh latin rappers that are oh yeah well he was great

and the two of them i don't know if they're dating but or having sex but they need to be because oh boy no they had such chemistry and they and florence told me that that uh that everyone's all in a tizzy about whether they're hooking up or not i don't know if that's true but but when you watch them sing to each other it's like oh you guys need to be fucking or you should be fucking because they look like they sold the shit out of being in love with each other in the in the song that's all that's what's up that's what's up all right should we end the show do we five six seven eight we did all right we did that already all right so let's get into it.

Do you have a recap or no? You're doing a recap? No, I'm not doing a recap today. Because are you like an athlete who did so many awesome dunks in one game that the next game they're like, you know what? I'm not going to dunk this hard in this game. No, it's just this wasn't necessarily my favorite episode. I can recap if you want to.

No, you weren't inspired. You weren't inspired. This is, you know, I do like the fact that Julianna Margulies is on the show. I think. I have a very funny story about Julianna Margulies, and that is that the scene in this show, which is at the very end when she kisses me deeply on my mouth. You guys are tongue kissing for real, dude. Yeah, we are full on this is the one time in my life this has ever happened in in in both working as an actor and in normal life i literally just met that woman when we shot that scene i was like hey nice to meet you so glad

you're here well this is awkward how they schedule it yeah yeah yeah i know okay here we go and we just fucking went at it like mega you mouth. You could see like tongues. You could see tongues like hitting the jaw. Well, you know, I think, you know, as a man, you're always kind of letting the female act. Well, I do. And I think you wait. You didn't laugh at that. You didn't laugh at that one on Saturday Night Live with the sex coaches.

Hey, you mind if I tap in for a bit? Hold up. I was thinking maybe you just turn over, right? How do you feel about doing it doggy style right here? You didn't laugh at that shit? I didn't see that one. Oh, my God. That's him.

Speaking of, speaking of, you know how nowadays when you have sex scenes and shows, you're talking about it right now. They have somebody come in. They have to have someone to make sure it's all safe and kosher. And so they had two dudes who were doing the Bridgerton. Oh, really? For season two. And so he's talking about, so I think then I will mount her here. And he goes, hey, you mind if I tap in there, chief?

That's funny. That must have been after the news, right? Because I. It was hilarious. Look, if you get a chance, watch that one. That should have me rolling. All right. That should be funny. Okay. Anyway, so you get a chance, watch that one. That should have me rolling. That should be funny. Okay, anyway, so you guys just met, and you're tongue kissing.

Dude, you guys were tongue kissing so much that you could see it. Her tongue poking my cheek. Yeah, it looked like you had something in your mouth trying to get out through your cheek. Well, I got to say that when you do – well, I think I'm speaking for you and me. I'm not speaking for all male actors. But, you know, you let the female act, you let your female scene partner take the lead on what kind of kiss this is going to be. Right.

If it's supposed to be passionate, we can just have open mouths and nothing going back and forth. I'll see where they're at. Actually, you've told this story. When you first did Kiss Judy, she gave you tongue, and you were like, oh! You're like bragging about it all over the place. Biggest mistake of my life.

Yes. Well, Julianne Margulies came at me with that tongue, and I was like, oh, you're like bragging about it all over the place. Biggest mistake of my life. Yes. Well, Julianne Margulies came at me with that tongue. And I was like, okay. Okay, Julianne Margulies. It's going to be like that. So Doug shaves the gentleman's half of his head. Yeah. That guy used to be on Degrassi High and Degrassi Junior High back in the day.

Really? Yeah. He was funny at a tiny part, but he was funny. Made me laugh. I wonder if Sarah recognized him back then because she was on – it's a Canadian show and she was on it, and he was one of the popular characters on it before it became the one with Drake. So I wonder if she recognized

well she goes nice half fro yeah he goes what oh and then he and then he reaches up with his left or his right hand and he's only touching the side that hasn't been shaved off and he's like few now doug this is the episode this is the episode where doug gets put away to down to the morgue yeah and um he's finally done hurting people yeah well it's interesting that all the people that are up there he's figuring out how they died and they've all died from doctor's era too yeah and it's an error. And it's an episode about malpractice and she's a malpractice attorney. One of them is

like someone left gloves. But that's the amazing thing is that Doug is like an expert at diagnosing who fucked up how. Right, because he's done it to everybody. He's like, are you kidding me? They call that a Doug.

But he's like, are you kidding me? They call that a Doug. But he's like, when you put him in the morgue, all of a sudden he's a genie. That's a really funny writing. It wasn't just like, oh, we'll stick him in the morgue. It's like, no, in the morgue, he's like a genius. Right. He's a freaking – right. He becomes freaking Rain Man in the morgue. Or Quincy.

What was it? Quincy. Quincy. Yeah, Quincy. Yeah, Quincy was a medical examiner, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. For those of you not as old as us, that was a TV show about a medical examiner

and he would always figure out the murder or what happened. Johnny Castle, very funny, man. Yeah, we gotta have Johnny Castle on the show. And it finally paid off too. Now, Joelle, which one did you book Richard Kind for? Because he's all over this episode, but we don't have him today.

He's for Friday. So our next episode, I confirmed this morning with his agent. Oh, good. This was the To Be Continued. Great. This was the To Be Continued. I don't think we... Have we had a To Be Continued before? Oh, I don't know. This is the first time I've ever seen a To Be Continued in front of... That's what I'm thinking.

I don't know if we've done that before. Now, all right. So, Doug defibrillates carla but yeah she she she i thought i thought it was a fantasy right it's not a family no it starts off as a sorry it starts off real right i mean you can't i mean i pretty sure i think she should be i don't know if it's universal truth. All of you who are in the medical profession can yell at your phones right now the correct answer. But I know that you can definitely kill someone by defibrillating them. Absolutely. And Judy gets – Carla gets thrown across the room. And then we go to this elaborate fantasy where Sarah and I throw Doug out of the ICU.

He lands. The janitor picks him up and mounts his head the janitor mounts his head to a wall right and but doesn't really kill him he has to hold the pose until the janitor finishes reading the paper right and he said oh there was an election recently i didn't know that i guess this is when obama got elected president is it there must have been something in election news let me see what was the date of uh this when this aired circa 03 right it aired uh november yeah november 9th 04 was that obama it had to be right no obama's not till 08. I knew that. Who got elected in November 9th of 04? Bush, baby.

Bush. So let's talk about call Turk. First of all, I really laughed at him. I'm like, why are you going to change your number? The way I remember it is Kofuninupa. Have you ever tried to do that? Did you do that? What?

I used to try and memorize numbers by what it spelled. Really? I never did that. You did it in a... Well, JD does. No, my character does. But it was like... So Bill makes this phone line.

We've told you this story before, but he actually chose a number. Rather than have 555 like they do in the movies, he chose a real – he got a real phone number. Now, was it Cal Turk or was it Cal Tur? It was Cal Tur. So it was C-A-L-L-T-U-R. Yes. Okay. Must have been 1-800, right?

I don't know what the... Oh, I don't know. What was it when we were kids? 9-7-6? That was the bad numbers? If you type 9-7-6, that's when it would be like... What was it?

That's how you knew it was like one of those numbers that charged you like a dollar a second? I don't know. There's some number you can call and it calls you back. That's star 6- 66 or something like that.

No, star 69 is what you would dial when you want to just call back whoever called you. I thought that was like who... Oh, is that what it was? Yeah, if someone called you and you missed the call... Star 69. You'd hit star 69 and it would call back whoever just called you. And it'd be like, hello? Yeah, motherfucker.

Who dis? You just called me? Right, you try to get all be like, hello? Yeah, motherfucker. Who this? You just called me? Right, you try to get all tough and stuff. Yeah. Who this? Who this? That's how you answer the door in my neighborhood. Who this?

Who is it? Yeah, so that phone would ring nonstop in the production office, and it was just there. And if you were bored, you'd pick it up. And people called it from all around the world. People would call that number. in the production office, and it was just there. And if you were bored, you'd pick it up. And talk to whomever. And people called it from all around the world. People would call that number. And I think we told you we put up a map,

and we would put a pin in different countries when they would call. It was just covered with pins. And I don't know. Did you ever chat with people on there, Don? Yeah, a couple of times. I thought it was really interesting how, because of this, Turk decided to play a huge prank on the janitor because he knew that jd would love cal call tur so much that he played a prank on the janitor to where the janitor has think uh is blamed for having blue handprints all over.

Well, it feels to me it's the first time you, as Turk, acknowledge that JD has a problem being stalked by the janitor. Right, and then he decides to prank the janitor. Where you're like, I'm going to do you. It's basically like you're doing me a favor. Why were you doing me a favor? I forgot why. Because I knew you'd like Cal Turk

Call Turk Right and then why did you do this giant Elaborate like vandalism Because I knew you'd like it And as a celebration And you being the only person That's a weird storyline But I remember I registered you know now that we're watching them all in a row

I was like I think this is the first time that Turk Is because it's funny like it it's never discussed really with anyone that JD is stalked by this guy. Right. And this is the first time that you were like, oh, I hooked you up with. I got your back. Watch this. Right. Yeah.

Right. But then what you did was pretty, you know, you painted your handprint all over the place. Right. I mean, it's kind of a dickish your handprint all over the place. Right. I mean, it's kind of a dickish thing to do to a janitor. Yeah, and then after I did that, I got his hands blue, too, so he would get the blame for it. Yes. Oh, that's why, does Kelso say something to him? Yeah, Kelso's like, oh, something like,

caught ya, or some shit like that. One of those, I don't know, shit, I don't know. Yeah, it's probably something like, caught ya. I like when you go, when we're talking about culture, and you go, but I'm going to ask people to still dial the K, even though there is no K, and I'm like, I'll always dial the K. Right, and that's when he goes, I know you will, and I'm like, I'll always dial the K. Right, and that's when he goes, I know you will, and because

of that, I did this for you. I don't know. It was weird. Yep. I like the chorus line number to the nuts. Very nice. Julianne Margulies does a big chorus line number one. Singular sensation

and a little step beat. And she nails all those guys in the balls. Including Mickhead. She gets Mickhead? I thought it was all stuntmen. A lot of these guys were background.

They just all had cups on, I guess. I don't know. Either that or the stick was dropped. I wonder if you get hazard pay if someone hits you in the balls. I mean, you should. If you're a background performer, they have things that get you bumped up. Like, oh, if you, you know. Right.

Did something slightly, not level of stunt, but you did something slightly hazardous, you get a bump. Getting kicked in the balls should definitely give you yeah i think getting caned in the balls by julianne margulies pay me yeah give me some give me some more money especially if she's hitting me with a hard cane like yeah that thing didn't look like it was not hard it looked like she could actually do that's why i just assumed it was stuntmen, because even if she could miss and nail you in the leg, but I guess Mickhead's not a professional. And it doesn't take much to...

They're so gentle. You'd think God or whoever, our creator or evolution, would have made the sack harder. It's so fragile. Dude, if you're not to get hit with anything and the impact feels like this sounds, you're in so much pain.

Yeah, and you can do it so lightly. If you just hit the right spot. It's like destroying the Death Star, Donald. If you just hit the right spot. That's probably the best death ever, The Death Star. Either the Death Star or being on Alderaan. Best death ever. So quick. Speaking of things you're

obsessed with, that episode of WandaVision was amazing. You loved it, right? How about that song that ends it? I want to play the song. It's so good. Did you hear the trap version of it? No, they've already got remixes? Yeah. It's so good. Did you hear the trap version of it? No, they've already got remixes?

Yeah, it's so good, too. I'll buy it and send it to you guys. They really are changing how TV is made over there at Disney, man. You need a budget now. You need a real budget, or you ain't making nothing no more. Well, I think that show is so good, And I know nothing about, like, it makes me, put it this way, the show is so good, it makes me want to go back and watch the movies where there's Vision and Wanda together. Oh, you know, then you're going to have to watch everything because Vision was Jarvis originally. And Jarvis was the voice in Tony's head.

I'm probably not going to do that, but I, I, I, I, it's really good. And I have to shout out Catherine Hahn because she's a Northwestern grad. She's on the cover of our Northwestern magazine this month. And I'm very proud of her. She's so good. And you know what? When she was just doing her little supporting stuff, I was still smiling because everybody loves Catherine Hahn. And then this episode, when she really had

a chance to shine, I was like, oh my God, that was amazing. She's always been good. She's always been good, though, man. She's always been just a great actress, and now, you know. Now she's having quite a moment. Yeah, she's having quite a moment. She's the

Marvel girl now. I know, but she's just one of those people that everyone, you know, now she's, now she's, now she's, yeah, she's having quite a moment. She's the marble girl now. I know, but she's just one of those people that everyone, you know, people might not know her, necessarily know her name, but they see her and they go, oh,

I love her. And now she's like, she's going to be a household name. Now she's, she's, she's, she's on fire. I saw that Julie Bowen,

who plays the mom on Modern Family and is, is really great and funny. She, she did a, like a shout out, like, you know, because,

you know, Elizabeth Olsen is, is playing her in the funny. She, she did a, like a shout out, like, you know, because, you know, Elizabeth Olsen is, is playing her in the episode. And, and she did such a, I gotta just say, again, I feel like Donald going on a rant about a fucking Marvel thing,

but Elizabeth Olsen. Yeah, man. Fantastic. Yeah, man. She, she is not just like,

okay for a, for a pretty girl. She's fantastic. Yeah. And she is changing her acting style with every episode to match the style of whatever they're, you know, highlighting, featuring, lampooning. Yeah, whichever era she's doing. And she does it so well from that like 50s like happy-go-lucky wife where she's twirling in the first episode all the way down to this just exhausting. She like did the whole Julie Bowen modern family thing.

It was amazing. Yeah, it was stunning. It's such a good – what a talent. Yeah, great show. All right, guys. We're going to take a break and then I promise you we're going to talk more about the television show Scrubs. We'll be right back. We're going to talk more about the television show Scrubs.

We'll be right back. I'm so excited about this podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart. Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side. Hi, I'm Martha Stewart, and we're back with a new season of my podcast. This season will be even more revealing and more personal with more entrepreneurs, more trailblazers, more live events, more Martha, and more questions from you. I'm talking to my cosmetic dermatologist, Dr. Dan Belkin, about the secrets behind my skincare. Walter Isaacson, about the geniuses who change the world.

Encore Jane, about creating a billion-dollar startup. Dr. Elisa Pressman about the five basic strategies to help parents raise good humans. Florence Fabricant about the authenticity in the world of food writing. Be sure to tune in to season two of the Martha Stewart podcast. Be sure to tune in to Season 2 of the Martha Stewart Podcast. Listen and subscribe to the Martha Stewart Podcast on the iHeartRad world and a woman's place in it. Crying in public. Two 20-something college women living in NYC dive into growing up at a time when there was no distinction between what's public and what's private. Best of both worlds. A discussion on work-life balance, career development, parenting, time management,

productivity, and making time for fun. Hear these podcasts and more on your free iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. I used to have so many men. How this beguiling woman in her 50s. She looked like a million bucks. With zero qualifications. She had a Harvard plaque. Tricks her way past a wall of lawyers and agents. She's got all of these Maseratis and Bentleys all in the driveway. Is it like a mansion? Yes, it's a mansion. That this queen of the con uses to scam some of the biggest names in professional sports out of untold fortunes. About six million. Approximately $11 million.

Nearly $10 million was all gone. Employing whatever means necessary to bleed her victims dry she would probably have sex with one of her clients hide your money in your old rich man because she is on the prowl listen to queen of the con season five the athlete whisperer on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back! And we're back! What about when I'm explaining the heart to Julianna Margulies,

and I say, it's like a house. And the ventricles are like rooms. It's got rooms. And she goes on this long monologue about how, like, I'm so much smarter than you. I know everything. Don't tell me. And then I'm like, rooms. Rooms. Yeah, man.

Richard Kind is back. Stealing Q-tips was hilarious. That was funny. I'm assuming these Q-tips are complimentary. Stealing Q-tips was hilarious. That was funny. I'm assuming these Q-tips are complimentary. I'm very happy that Joelle has booked Richard Kind finally on the show,

one of our favorite guest stars ever. And the janitor is such a jerk for giving Richard Kind, Turk, and Carla's address, man. And he comes to their house. He docks to you. He docks to you. He docks to you. What the? Richard, well, you're at dinner and they're standing. You're at dinner and your phone rings.

And she goes, baby, don't answer your phone. And you go, baby, when you call Turk, you get Turk. You get Turk. How did you know my number? The janitor's pretty good with the dark web, I'm guessing. Huh? Well, he's got access to all of our files. I think we've established that he knows every single thing about us.

That's right. From the breakfast club, that was a great moment when they realized, oh, snap, the janitor has gone through everybody's files and knows do you remember that in the breakfast club the janitor or the or no the janitor the janitor does he goes through everybody's lockers he goes through everybody's stuff oh so so then when right before you're talking what the thing you're talking about when uh the janitor sees richard kind he goes i can help you uh if you want I can help you what does he say? I can help you

I'm listening just in his great Richard Kind voice I'm listening go on Mike Schwartz the loneliest man alive is funny probably the funniest thing in the episode first him touching you.

And then the two of you bumping each other at the end and doing it. So Lloyd, I don't know if he's been named Lloyd yet, but this is the Mike Schwartz who we've mentioned is one of our favorite writers on the show. And he wrote last week's episode, the one that I directed and he plays Lloyd, the,

I guess he's basically a FedEx guy, right, without being a FedEx guy. And this was one of – Mike had lots of bits. I mean Mike could have been a stand-up. He had so much – so many funny – he was the guy in the writer's room who would just make everybody die laughing because he was just constantly doing shtick. And one of his things I think was this where he said, you want to see what the loneliest guy in the world looks like? And then someone just touches his shoulder and he goes, mmm. He like cuddles up

to his own shoulder where he was touched. Just where the warmth was. Right. And then, so that's funny. And then he cut later and we both do it. I bump into each other. I bump into him. You bump into each other.

I bump into him. And we both simultaneously go. Turn around and do it at the same time and then walk away. It was well timed too. Yeah, so lonely. Very funny. Both so lonely. How about when I'm putting the, that's a really funny cutaway.

It looks like I'm sleeping with this, having sex with this woman. The bed's like shaking and bouncing. And then you reveal that i did it for this beautiful woman but she's not even hooked up with me she hooks up with a shirtless ripped guy right and i'm like why couldn't he have done it right then you walk out and then you join elliot in the closet and this wasn't a fantasy they're in the closet making out and he still doesn't have a shirt on yeah and i say dynamite areolas i think that jd is a real areola connoisseur because he's often he loves him some area he loves him some area but he's often commenting

on male areolas yeah i don't know why the character is so appreciative of a nice male areola. When you got him, you got him. It's just like, he's like insecure about his own or something because he's always like, oh, look at that guy. Like the guy ripped, right? He's like a muscle builder ripped guy who spends every waking second of his life in the gym.

And all JD notices is there's dynamite areolas. That had to be a freaking, whatchamacallit, improv by Zach Graff. Yeah, I'm sure it was. dynamite areolas. That had to be a freaking whatchamacallit improv by Zach Graff. Yeah, I'm sure it was. Dynamite areolas. What's the I'm not that lonely? Oh yeah,

I'm not that lonely. Very funny. Wait, I have a question. So when Doug is taken downstairs to investigate these deaths, those are all malpractice deaths. Yeah. There's not a single death in there that was like, oh, hematoma or something. No, because I think that the initial joke is that Doug, because he's done all of these things himself, he's able to diagnose how another fellow doctor killed this patient. There's five in one day at a single hospital?

Yeah, not only that. Not good for taking it hard. No. Well, I mean, it happens a lot at hospitals. But he even comes upstairs, back upstairs, and he's like, hey, such and such, I saw your handiwork in the morgue. Yeah. Keep it. Licking on his lollipop. Keep it up. Now he's all cocky.

He's got the Kojak lollipop and everything. All the coroners always have to be eating something. So this guy's got a lollipop. That's interesting that it's always like that, though. But it's just to show you how comfortable they are around smiling.

I know. We talked about it once before. It's like try and find a scene with a coroner where he or she is either definitely really odd looking or weird. And then they give them some quirk. And then there's always something about them eating. something about them eating or they're just so immune to to to being around a corpse that they're comfortable having their sandwich eating a chest pepperoni and cheese sandwich right which is tasty it's good i gotta say donald um casey posted you both posted videos of your daughter dancing it's the cutest thing i've ever seen in my entire life. I didn't know my daughter could dance like that.

She's really good. Yeah. I didn't know she could dance. And she's so, I don't know, bouncy and effervescent and into it. She has that. She's got that thing. I got a lot of people hit me up. I had dancers hit me up to tell me, yo, dude, not bad.

Well, great. And she loves it, right? So she can stick with it. She's at dance class now. Amazing. I felt such pride as the godfather watching her dance. I did too as her real father. I was like, holy cow.

I knew she could dance and she liked to dance, but I didn't know she could do choreography. And she didn't come she could do choreography and you know she didn't come home and rehearse that at all you know and so i wasn't expecting to see her really dance but it's all dances that she can do like it's i don't know man it's just really it's really surreal to see your kid do something and you not know that that talent you knowing the talent was there but not knowing that it was that like that after while i was watching i was like she's got that thing she got

there's a little bit of that she got a little bit of that thing in her she's yeah she's she's really into you know she's not trying hard she's having fun it's not you know i loved it yeah man she's she's got she's got and she's just so frigging cute, man. Good work. Good baby making. Thank you. I wish I could take all of the credit. That's all my wife.

All right, we're going to go to break. And when we come back, we are going to talk to an amazing guest that Joelle has curated for all of our listening pleasure. Bring a little optimism into your life with The Bright Side, a new kind of daily podcast from Hello Sunshine. Hosted by me, Danielle Robay. And podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart. Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side. Hi, I'm Martha Stewart, and we're back with a new season of my podcast.

This season will be even more revealing and more personal with more entrepreneurs, more trailblazers, more live events, more Martha, and more questions from you. I'm talking to my cosmetic dermatologist, Dr. Dan Belkin, about the secrets behind my skincare. Walter Isaacson, about the geniuses who change the world. Encore Jane, about creating a billion-dollar startup. Dr. Elisa Pressman about the five basic strategies to help parents raise good humans. Florence Fabrikant about the authenticity in the world of food writing.

Be sure to tune in to season two of the Martha Stewart Podcast. Listen and subscribe to the Martha Stewart Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you've been following the news, you know that from health care access to safe schools, LGBTQ plus rights are under attack. And it's about time queer and trans youth get the microphone and tell their stories in their own words. I'm Raquel Willis. Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles, a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words.

This season, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states. I wish I could feel more comfortable in my own body here, but that's just not the case. And follow along as they discover what queer and trans liberation means to them. This isn't running away from yourself. It's running into who you want to grow into. away from yourself. It's running into who you want to grow into. Listen to Queer Chronicles on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your most fabulous shows. As important as choosing the right destination when traveling is choosing the right travel partner.

Jean! Jean Fodor! Jean! Much of the joy you will find on the road comes from the person you share it with. Jean! Eugene Fodor! Jean, where are you? Much of the joy you will find on the road comes from the person you share it with. So you write these books, Jean. I have a lot of work in this business. I understand now. It is a wise man to marry a wise woman.

But be careful and choose your travel partner well. Because the worst trips result when two partners have two different agendas. Get down! I'm not stupid, Gene. Something is going on in its high time you tell me the truth. Freeze, Americano! Gene, run! So travel before it's too late.

Your money will return, your time won't, and we're all too quickly approaching that final destination. Listen to Fodor's Guide to Espionage on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Scratch, rewatch, go with Zach and Donald. And we're back! And we're back! Gurgle? No, we don't gurgle anymore.

You thought it was a little gurgle? I don't gurgle anymore. do it's a little gurgle i don't gurgle anymore give it up for like a mike is that your name no no it's mike give it up for mike hi mike welcome to the program oh my god this is. This is so crazy. I know. It's pretty surreal, I'm sure, after listening to us for a while to see it all happen. This is Joel, and there's Daniel, and that's me, Donald Faison. And that's the Zach Braff. This is me, the Zach Braff. I can't believe I'm live with the Faison closet. There you are.

There it is. There's all those sundresses. Well, there it is. Welcome. Amazing. There's all those sundresses. There it is. Speaking of which, we're going to be doing live from the closet for our live show. It's going to be exciting.

Great idea. Go ahead, Donald. I can't wait to be in my closet for the live show in my onesie. Are you committing to the onesie? Because I'm on the fence of onesie or suit. Let's let the fans decide. Let's let the fans decide. We should let the fans decide.

Amongst telling us things that you want on the live show, if you could tell us if you'd rather Donald and I in onesies or suits, we'd appreciate it. I'd vote onesies. I was also just recently gifted a t-shirt that says Mazel Tov, motherfuckers. I might wear that too. Wow.

That's right on no no no it's not really appropriate i want to i want to i want to be appropriate um mike where where are you uh calling us from uh minneapolis minnesota yes sir is that your accent donald is that your minnesota accent i was trying my best to do my minnesota by the way speaking of midwest accents you have to watch barb and Star go to Vista Del Mar. Is it funny? It's hilarious. Wait, hold on.

Is it funny the whole movie or is it funny 15 minutes and that's it? No, I'm telling you it's hilarious. Now, you have to go into it in a silly mood. It's like the silliest Will Ferrell movie you've ever seen except it's Kristen Wiig. Right. I mean, it's absurd. Donald, get as high movie you've ever seen, except it's Kristen Wiig. Right. I mean, it's absurd. Donald, get as high as you've ever gotten. I said it.

Beat your record. I don't get high like that no more. I know. At a certain point, you can't get higher. It just stopped. Yeah, you stop. But it's unlike alcohol, where you can just pass out and die. You're just kind of like, oh, this is my max.

And there we are. We've reached it. But anyway, it's very funny. And I mean, it's so silly. But I laughed out. Kristen Wiig is so fucking funny. Have you watched License to Drive yet? No, you just told me to watch it.

I haven't had a chance yet. Can we focus on Mike? Mike, do you have a question for us? Mike's not talking. Mike wanted to be quiet all of a sudden. No wanted to be no i took over no i took over mike wanted to share and i was talking about vista del mar um mike would you have a question for us sure um has there been throughout the the filming of scrubs was there ever an episode or a script that you guys read where the plot line of the episode helped you out with your own life in any way, like with an issue you were having or a decision you were weighing? Wow, that's a very good question. That's a great question.

I'm coming out hard, man. No, it's good. You make us think. I'm so glad you don't ask like something that we've been asked A hundred times that's an interesting question I will say this Carla turned out to be The type of

Relation Carla and Turk turned out to be the type of relationship That I wanted in real life It wasn't just on television And so when I met my wife, my now wife, she had a lot of the same type of, I'm not saying she was Carla, but she had the same type of traits. She was very responsible, but she was also a ball buster. And I couldn't get away with doing the things that I would normally do.

And it was very much like what Carla is in real on the show. She was that real life. So that may be, but as far as like life lessons and stuff like that. Well, I will say that, you know, a very, a common theme of the episodes was to, you know, live in the moment and savor your friendships and, you know, I can't do this all on my own, meaning like I need to be present to how amazing my friendships are. And I think that, you know, that definitely impacted my life. I think that, you know, if you act in something for this long and you're putting out this message week after week, I think it's interesting to think about, like, that it made me really savor how special

my friendships are in my life. Well, that and also zach yeah i will say that you and you johnny sarah judy yeah that came with the show also uh bill krista that all uh that came with the show also i just i don't know i i can't pinpoint any one lesson that we had on the show and we you know as doing doing the recaps and everything i can totally relate to a lot of the things that we've we've gone through so far but at the time when we were making it known it it didn't necessarily i mean it's hard it's hard to say um mike honestly because there's so many of them you know i'm sure if looked back, I'd go, oh, you know, that did, but it's hard to do in a macro way.

Look it. What about you, Daniel? You're the stan of the group when it comes to scrubs. She is. Yeah! Why you gotta do me like that? You do honor me. A life lesson from a particular episode?

I mean, okay. Sure. I got one. Yeah, I got one too. And I would say it was guy love. I would say, especially, you know, in my high school, you know, in my high school age, you know, and we're dredging up some, you know, problematic feelings. So just, you know, preparing everybody for this. But it was so commonplace just to use the word gay as a as, you know, a bad word to describe something we didn't like. And it was shows it was shows like Scrubs that kind of changed my perspective on loving your friends and also changed my perspective on using the word gay as

something bad. It was, I mean, of course having, having gay friends and, you know, just trying to adjust my own, you know,

language as a stupid ass teenager to not be an offensive jerk all the time, but also realizing that like being open about your emotions and being friendly with your guy friends has nothing to do with any of that has nothing to do with sexuality it's just being friends and it's just being open and it's about you know being in touch with your feelings and all of that and i think something like guy love was a little bit of like yeah that i relate to that that's what i'm looking for that that is how I feel. And like trying to like suppress that because friends were saying stuff like that's gay was not only incredibly ignorant and problematic at the time, but was just not true.

Yeah. Well, that's good. I hope we made a the that that men felt like you know we've always battled um you know we're a little bit older than you but we always battled that thing we're like oh you guys are being so gay and it was always this this negative thing and uh and and donald and i aspired and and with with bill's writing to try and make that go away. What about you, Joelle? There's an episode, I think it's in season one,

where Cox just absolutely reams JD for really wanting a mentor. And the idea of, oh my God, in high school, I wanted a mentor so bad. I was like, I want to be an artist, but I don't know how to like break into the industry and it really needs somebody who's gonna like teach me and guide me like mold me and i like watched every like high art you know drama film where like this brilliant person is discovered and then they're like shaped so that they can like get on their way and it was like hearing that basically you're just going to have to stand on your own two feet and figure this shit out was like revolutionary. Like it seems obvious, but it was something I really needed to hear at a young age so that I could stop looking for help and just start doing the things I wanted to do. And it wound up being like a really impactful lesson for me.

You're your own mentor, Joelle. i try to be you are you are it's working all right mike do you have another question for us that was a good one you made us all think um all right how about a fun one now yes go ahead if um if jd and turk had a peloton what would their usernames be and who would their favorite instructors be oh definitely cody cody all the way cody nice nice cody ringsby no doubt and my i definitely think turk would be can would be called brown bear yes i'd be called Brown Bear. Yes. I'd be called Eagle Rider. Eagle Rider. Fantastic. It's funny you ask that.

Although, you know, I think JD and Turk would definitely be doing all the musical rides. It would be like the Wicked Ride. Wicked. Wicked Hamilton Ride. I don't even do those rides. I don't even do those rides. I don't even do those rides. By the way, yeah, JD and Turk would have

a fucking Peloton built for two. And then you could picture the fucking scrub shot, right? It would start on Donald and he'd be peddling his ass off, right? And then it would Dolly to reveal me and I'm just like

doing something else. Like, what? I'm hungry. Eating a sandwich. You know, we only get one hour to work out together. Oh my God. I Peloton was a thing when scrubs came out.

There definitely would have been a Peloton. That's a reboot idea right there. There you go. We'll tell Bill. We'll tell Bill. Bring a little optimism into your life with the bright side, a new kind of daily podcast from hello. you go. We'll tell Bill. We'll tell Bill. podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart. Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side. Hi, I'm Martha Stewart, and we're back with a new season of my podcast.

This season will be even more revealing and more personal with more entrepreneurs, more trailblazers, more live events, more Martha and more questions from you. I'm talking to my cosmetic dermatologist, Dr. Dan Belkin, about the secrets behind my skincare. Walter Isaacson about the geniuses who changed the world. Encore Jane about creating a billion-dollar startup. Dr. Elisa Pressman about the five basic strategies to help parents raise good humans.

Florence Fabricant about the authenticity in the world of food writing. Be sure to tune in to season two of the Martha Stewart podcast. Listen and subscribe to the Martha Stewart podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. iHeart Podcast update this week on your free iHeartRadio app.

In retrospect, revisit pop culture moments from the 80s and 90s and try to understand what it taught us about the world and a woman's place in it. Crying in Public. Two 20-something college women living in NYC dive into growing up at a time when there was no distinction between what's public and what's private. Best of Both Worlds. A discussion on work-life balance, career development, parenting, time management, productivity,

and making time for fun. Hear these podcasts and more on your free iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. If you've been following the news, you know that from health care access to safe schools, LGBTQ plus rights are under attack. And it's about time queer and trans youth get the microphone and tell their stories in their own words. I'm Raquel Willis. Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles, a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words. This season, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states. I wish I could feel more comfortable in my own body here, but that's just

not the case. And follow along as they discover what queer and trans liberation means to them. This isn't running away from yourself. It's running into who you want to grow into. Listen to Queer Chronicles on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your most fabulous shows. All right, my friend, it is time for Minneapolis's favorite segment. It's time to fix your life. We were going to have the sound machine ready, Mike. You were going to be our first guest.

You were about to be the first guest where I have access to the sound machine, but we had some technical difficulties. Daniel's going to have to come over. I'm going to have to come over. Daniel, you're going to have to come over in your hazmat suit. Nope. No problem. The numbers are going down. double numbers are going down flush

all right well you know what you know what that doesn't mean we let up off the gas donald no i'm not saying this far hold up i'm not i'm saying the numbers are going down maybe not a hazmat suit all right just the mask and he doesn't have to do a full do the double mask double mask i'm double i'm double mask and i'll tell you what. Yeah. You can double mask and maybe wear some surgical gloves. You watching Star Wars, Joelle? Why are you yelling? Currently? Oh, yeah. Sorry.

Sorry. Joelle, get a bigger TV. What is that? Rebels? What is that? Rebels? Yeah. Is it Concord Dawn? Is it Concord Dawn? I'm not sure which episode. Turn it real quick.

You can't have Star Wars on in the background. Turn it real quick. Show Donald. He wants to see. What episode is it, Donald? Oh, I know the episode. Ezra. I can tell you right now.

Turn it away so I can tell you real quick. Ezra, Kanan, and Captain Rex land on an old base that's occupied by Separatists. And a battle droid, a supreme battle droid is there. And they do a Clone Wars scenario. And at the end of it, Ezra solves the battle of the Clone Wars. And they all come to realize that the Empire is the common enemy. And just as they realize that, the Empire shows up. And they fight the Empire and escape with the new Phantom in that episode.

They get the new Phantom because Ezra lost the Phantom. That is the episode. Am I right? Am I right? Am I right, Joelle? You're definitely right. Daniel, I need a snore added to my sound pack. How dare you?

Joelle, I'm glad to know that you're doing the show while watching Star Wars Rebels. You really are Donald's long lost wife. You just keep Star Wars on constantly. I really feel like in another life, you guys would just pull bong hits and watch fucking Star Wars Rebels. We would have been the best college roommates, okay? We could have told her shit. All right, Mike, sorry. Sorry. How can how can we help you sir we're here to help all right well i had sent uh joelle one thing and something else has taken its place that is kind of equal parts terrifying and hilarious so i have a nine-year-old

son so this is probably a little bit more for for donald but i have a nine-year-old son so this is probably a little bit more for for Donald but I have a nine-year-old son and my wife discovered him recently in his bed stark naked with a flashlight and her copy of Us Weekly and... I was more of a Victoria's Secrets kind of guy. You got to start somewhere. Us Weekly is a funny choice. It is. It is.

All right. What was the flashlight for? I assume the flashlight was because it was night, but it's funny if it was daylight. He wants to put a spotlight on that shit. It was nighttime it was nighttime so um i am now in that that that terrifying you know area of you know he's nine like do we start any type of conversation around you know the the dirty stuff well i mean i think you do i don't know how dirty it is either. I think,

I think the conversation is, I, you don't want him to feel like he's doing anything wrong. That's the most important. You don't want him to ever associate shame with those feelings. Cause he doesn't know, you know, remember, I mean, you can remember when you were that young, you don't know what the fuck's going on. You're like going through all he doesn't know you know remember you mean you can remember when you were that young you don't know what the fuck's going on you're like going through all these changes and you know for some kids it's going to start earlier than others and you don't want him to ever i mean you're the first so you could be you or your wife could be

the first source of shame and you don't want to go anywhere near that you want to make him feel that it's all normal and okay you are fine there's nothing wrong with what you're doing and it's it's all natural but then have a conversation about what it is he's doing and what you know and that that's because he could literally he could have just been butt naked trying to read a magazine that belonged to you and your wife and not knowing right now come on zach you never you never know he's just perusing us weekly well he knows that he's he knows that it's not a comic a book that he's supposed to read obviously so he's hiding and reading it i just love gossip mom no but no but think about think about think no but think about it the way

him being naked and everything has nothing to do i don't think that has anything to do with the book. I think that has everything to do with the fact that he's only nine years old and there shouldn't be – at nine years old, my kid walks around the house naked. He has brothers and sisters here, and he doesn't care. You know what I mean? He's seven. He doesn't care. I think – I don't know. I don't know the circumstances. I don't know the circumstances i don't

know what he's saying he's i mean i get a sense what mike is saying is like i know my kid i know that he was fascinated with this and um and what do i do my my my wife you know came to me with this and just said this is your area i don't know how to deal with this you know i think a book can really help you mike i remember my mom – this is so outdated probably. I'm sure there's a 2021 better version. But the one – Donald, I don't know if you had this. It was called What's Happening to Me. No, I didn't.

And it was all about puberty and for a children's book but about the changes that are going. What are these – What's happening? What are these feelings? So I would recommend, and I remember we would laugh at that book because we were nervous and it was like, and you don't even have to read it with the kid. You can say like, hey man, here's a book we got you.

But anyway, the book that we had. Read this, it's just for you. Any questions? Use your flashlight and read it. No, the book that we had. Read this. It's just for you. Any questions? Use your flashlight and read it. No. The book that we had was called What's Happening to Me. And in a funny, kind of irreverent way, with funny pictures, it explained to kids what's happening. Because it's weird.

They don't know. And we didn't have the internet. I mean, God forbid. At least he's looking at us weekly and not. That's exactly what I said. It's time to put the parental controls on all your shit. There you go. That is the truth right there because there's definitely a curiosity brewing.

And the last thing you want is him to find, you know, internet porn. The good stuff. You know what I mean? No, I think, I really think, and i don't have kids so i'm just saying from my own experience the the and coming from child psychologist parents but the the only the best thing you can do is make sure that you and your wife don't ever embarrass him about any of it um because think about when you were little like you just you don't know what the hell's going on you have all these feelings and all of a sudden you want to look at your mom's gossip magazine

because there's a woman in a bathing suit or whatever i mean victoria i remember like the victoria's secret catalog would arrive and i just remember like looking around i'm like i'm taking this dude that shit came to my room i used to have to work at a well i didn't work my parents worked at a theater and so i used to have to go with them and sit in the audience and watch shows and there was this one show called one monkey don't stop no show right and in the play they look at this book called the joy of sex they bought the real book i think i was like nine eight or nine maybe, you know what I mean? And one night when the play was over and my dad's packing up and my mom's, you know, packing up too, I said, let's go find out. Let's go find this Joy of Sex book.

Yeah. I got some reading I want to do. Let me tell you something right now. Go ahead. Us Weekly ain't got nothing on the joy of sex holy cow it would and it was graphic too but it was all art it was all drawn in art and stuff like that and i'm sitting backstage at my parents theater freaking looking at you know with the slow page turn with real slow page and like Like, it was all pictures, too. So, you know, Curia, be happy he didn't find that.

You know what I mean? And he found us. I used to remind me, Donald, that my parents had a book. We had a big bookshelf with tons of hundreds of books when I was growing up. I must have been younger than your son, Mike. And they had a book called Birth. Oh, God. And Birth was like from the 70s, like women, you know,

like everything you need to know about birth. But it was like definitely women spread open and, you know, preparing for birth. And I just remember just like lying in the library, just like slow, doing slow page turns on birth and it was so not sexual i mean it was like it was like explaining the birthing process to new moms and i was just like fascinated but you know it's gonna happen man Mike you know

you went through it it's the change is coming I recommend a book I mean first of all be honest with him and talk to him like like you wish you know I always feel like in these opportunities you have the opportunity to be the best fucking dad you can you gotta it might be embarrassing you might cringe a little bit but you're like you know what

this is that moment where I get to shine and be like i'm i don't know how well your dad did it or your mom did it but like i'm gonna crush this assignment i'm gonna and like you know i'm sure that you can have a straight honest talk with him where he doesn't feel embarrassed but then also i recommend a book because i remember it working for me i mean like because sometimes they don't want to like they might want you can give him some basics to his face and have a a frank conversation but then he might want like a children's book that he can kind of peruse alone that's like that's not i'm not embarrassed in front of my my parents right sure what do you think you're the dad no i i i i i agree i don't

i don't think this is a i don't think this is a bad thing. This is an opportunity for you to get to know your son a little bit more. You know what I mean? And so take the opportunity and enjoy it. I mean, I'd always had the intention of being, you know, that rock star dad that has the talk and does it like the perfect way because my dad never did. I learned on my own. But yeah, I was just hoping i had a few more years but well mike i would say the talk mike i would imagine the talk's going to evolve the talk you have when when he's 13 is probably the talk different than the talk

you're going to have at nine but at nine you can you can you can most importantly let him know that he's not it's not weird he's not you. He's not, you know, you know, I would, you know, I remember like thinking, I remember thinking just like, what's, you know, what is going on? Like, what is happening? Why does that feel nice? I told you about the sharper image massager my parents had. Have I told you that story on this show? I don't know if I want to tell this story.

Did you fuck the sharp-rimmed massage? If that sharp-rimmed massager had the ability to ovulate, it would have definitely been pregnant. Oh, no. Oh, no. I just remember I went looking for it once in the linen closet where it always was. And one day I went and like it wasn't there.

And I was like, where the fuck is the sharp image massager? And my parents had put it on a very high shelf. They had somehow assessed that I was, you know, massaging myself with it. know massaging myself with it and they thought that that high shelf was gonna keep me from my robotic lover i climbed i climbed that fucking shit oh my god got her back down give her love okay amazing oh we gotta cut this I'm sure no no no no I don't want the world to know that I made it with a sharper image massager

very funny alright Mike you're welcome sir you are so welcome Mike good luck give us an update so we know that it all went well and look for some good books I don't know what the 2021 version of What's Happening to Me is. For all I know, there's an updated version of that. Sure.

But I'm sure there's a lot of parents, man, with nine-year-olds who are searching for the same book to deal with it. Donald, you got that coming, man. Your kid's not far away from this. Yeah, man. I'm not really looking forward to it either all right mike um good luck you can hang out we're gonna finish oh yeah you can hang out because we're done we did the show i had one part that i want to bring up again that i want to talk about i had one part in the episode that i want to talk about, and I thought it was very funny, where you walk in with Cox and you're like, I'll take the lead on this one. Mr. Steele, first name, man of.

And Cox goes, you're out. That's it. You're out. Very hard. You're out. Oh, another little bit of trivia is that there's a moment where we're all lying down in a a four bed room Me, you and Sarah and a patient And you're hearing all in our heads Right?

Yeah And then the patient The voice of the patient was Mike Schwartz The same writer who was The needy FedEx driver A little trivia for you guys I got from Scrubs Wiki.

Is there anything you want to say to the people before we leave, Zach? Yeah. You always ask me. You always ask me. I'm going to give you the opportunity. You have the floor, sir. It's a great opportunity to talk to so many people around the world. I want to tell you that I love you, and I wish you kindness and love.

that I love you and I wish you kindness and love. Be the person that when someone lets you merge into traffic, you put your hand up as a thank you. Be that person. The other day, I encountered someone who wasn't that person. I thought, it's so easy to just give the thanks high five. It's so easy to just give the thanks high five. Be that person. And hey, mark your calendars because March 26 is going to be our live show. Boom. And it's going to be a lot of fun. We're putting together a whole plan.

And it's going to be special. And we're really excited about it. And we're not just phoning it in. We're going to really put some effort into it. We'll let you know. Joelle will let us all know when when when you can go buy tickets but go to your ical right now and uh and mark the date save the date as they say march 26th friday night it'll be 6 p.m on the west coast 9 p.m on the east coast and um everyone else if you're asleep and you don't want to stay up you'll be able to to listen to the next... No, no, no. They got to stay up and watch it live.

If you're in Stod, you're not going to fucking stay up. They will stay up in Stod. Stod's a hip, hip town. They're really doing things different in Stod nowadays, I heard. Well, you know what? Stod is a really posh ski town, so they're probably going to be up partying anyway, so why not leave the bar and go listen to the

podcast? They'll be partying in St. Bart's. Might as well be partying anyway so why not leave the bar and uh go listen to the podcast they'll be partying in saint bart's might as well be partying with them with us yeah make doctors real friends live party with us we love you joelle thank you thanks for watching rogue one while you're doing the show no rebels rebels sorry rebels it's a great episode too actually one of the one of the okay enough of that. Okay. Daniel, I need the snore for my machine. I got you. I never – Donald talks about Star Wars.

No problem. We'll get it done. All right, guys. We love you. Count us out, Donald. Five, six, seven, eight. about a bunch of docs and nurses and a Canada who loved to hate. I said he's got stories that we all should know. So gather round to hear our,

gather round to hear our Scrubs Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald. Mm-hmm. Bring a little optimism into your life with The Bright Side, a new kind of daily podcast from Hello Sunshine. Hosted by me, Danielle Robay. And me, Simone Boyce.

Every weekday, we're bringing you conversations about culture, the latest trends, inspiration, and so much more. I am so excited about this podcast, The Bright Side. You guys are giving people a chance to shine a light on their lives, shine a light on a little advice that they want to share. Listen to The Bright Side on America's number one podcast network, iHeart. Open your free iHeart app and search The Bright Side. I'm Raquel Willis. Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles, a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words. This season, teens will share all about growing up

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Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty. So in this podcast, I'm gonna be talking about marriage, divorce, my family, my career. I'm also going to be talking a lot about cancer, the ups and the downs, everything that I've learned from it. It's gonna be a wild ride.

So listen to Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Hey, it's Alec Baldwin. This past season on my podcast, Here's the Thing, I spoke with more actors, musicians, policymakers, and so many other fascinating people, like jazz bassist Christian McBride. Jazz is based on improvisation, but there's very much a form to it. You have a conversation based on that melody and those chord changes. So it's kind of like giving someone a topic and say, okay, talk about this. Listen to the new season of Here's the Thing on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

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