Fake Doctors, Real Friends with Zach and Donald - 618: My Turf War

Episode Date: July 11, 2022

On this week's episode, JD feels threatened by Elliot's college roommate and tries to sabotage their relationship. In the real world, the guys get a fun surprise call from an old friend. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I'm Raquel Willis. Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles, a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words. This season, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states. We will always exist and we will definitely not let them take away our joy, no matter how hard they try. Listen to Queer Chronicles on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your most fabulous shows. Hi, this is Shannon Doherty, host of the new podcast, Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty. So in this podcast, I'm going to be talking about marriage, divorce, my family, my career. I'm also going to be talking a lot about cancer, the ups and the downs, everything that I've learned from it. It's going to be a wild ride. So listen to Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Hey, it's Alec Baldwin. This past season on my podcast, Here's the Thing, I spoke with more actors, musicians, policy makers, and so many other fascinating people like jazz bassist Christian McBride. Jazz is based on improvisation,

but there's very much a form to it. You have a conversation based on that melody and those chord changes. So it's kind of like giving someone a topic and say, okay, talk about this. Listen to the new season of Here's the Thing on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Jay Shetty, and I'm the host of the On Purpose podcast. And I had the opportunity to talk to one of Hollywood's major icons,

Michael B. Jordan. In our conversation, Michael shares the highs, the lows, and everything in between, offering a genuine glimpse into his world. The closest to getting what you want is always the hardest. People give up right before they get what they've always wanted to get. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi.

Hi, Casey. Talk about it. Talk about it. I'm hormonal. Super hormonal. You're hormonal. Oh, maybe you're pregnant. Ugh.

Doubt it. Are you pregnant? That's probably what it is. We need another one. Another one. Another one. Another one. No, I'm just like, the older you get, the more hormonal you get. And it's like depressing. And then Tim's is all he wants me to do is give him blowjobs all day.

This is the best reality show ever. I look at him. I'm like, no, it it's like it's like handmaids up in this house right now really you feel like a handmaid oh i got no i feel like yeah and i have attitude and i'm pissed off and all and all donald does in in to help soothe you is say can you blow me yeah he wants me to and i'm like. You're lucky I'm even fucking unloading the dishwasher at this point. I'm so pissed off. Facts.

It's a hard time to be a woman right now. Yeah. He's got a lot of audacity, that husband of yours. You know what else? Y'all should also think about this. Well, I'm talking to Joelle, but y'all should know this shit. So I even went to Target yesterday to buy tampons. They don't even have tampons.

Ma'am, what? We have a tampon shortage. There's a tampon shortage, yeah. I am unable. I cannot. As if shit isn't fucked up enough. Oh, my God. I know.

I heard that it's related. Isn't fucked up enough. Oh my God. I know. I heard that it's related. Dan or Joelle, you might know this, to the mass producing all the COVID products in a hurried way has affected the cotton sourcing or something. And that's what's affecting the tampon shortage. Is that accurate?

I would believe that. I'm not 100% sure if that is. I heard that. I read that on the interwebs, which means it's probably 40% true. I think it's fucked up and the timing is just really not cool. According to goodhousekeeping.com, as of June 23rd, 2022, so a few days, about a week ago, Edgewell, manufacturer of tampon brands Playtex and OB, told Good Housekeeping that it has unfortunately experienced workforce shortages at its production facilities in relation to

COVID surges. The brand claims that inventory has been negatively impacted as a result. I literally was on the aisle yesterday and there was a 70-year-old woman looking at, you know, pull-up diapers. And I looked at her and I was like,

as if we're not getting screwed enough already. She was like, I know, honey. I know. Can't even get a tampon. Anyway at least there's blow jobs blow jobs will always fix that he doesn't know what a good wife he has if only he knew he doesn't i gotta go all right i'm sure Cheer up. I hope it's a baby. All right, bye. I know. I love you guys. That was the most non-sequitur. We'll give it to him to take care of. I'll take care of it.

I'll totally take care of your baby. My God. That was a very funny start to the show. Hi, Donald. Sounds like there's a lot of fun things going on at your house. We are, well, I'm going to say one thing. My wife works very hard to keep our family going. Yes.

And, you know, it's a job that she's given herself. And it's not fair that that's what she's, you know, been tasked to do or feels like she's been tasked to do. Instead of asking for blowjobs, has it occurred to you to maybe, and this might be out of the box, help her more? I mean, how does that help me, though? Like, I mean, I'm talking about how much I love my wife. Right. I got to help more, too?

Yeah, you also need to maybe help her. By the way, I have exciting news for everyone. Daniel, you're going to be thrilled about this. Joelle, Donald. Can't wait. I finally, finally tasked my assistant with figuring out how to get the new sound effects into the sound machine. Eat these bowls, Zach. Eat these bowls, Zach.

Mines are easy, man. Watch this. Yeah, well, mine took someone taking the time to read the manual. Listen. Everybody likes a little ass flay. Everybody likes a little ass flay. Don't even act like you don't. They're finally in the machine everybody how

exciting so wait you tasked your assistant to do that for you yes because it involved reading the manual a very thick manual and i was busy fuck your sound effects machine fuck your sound effects machine you got it labeled i see you got it? Well, he's so smart and good with technical things. He knew how- Let me get a mm-hmm. If you got it labeled, let me get a mm-hmm. Okay. Mm-hmm.

Wow. Nailed it. Nailed it. Dude, shit is going down. I'm so excited. This is, you know, it took some figuring out. I want to credit my assistant, Mark, who's good at all things. And here we go.

Everybody likes a little ass play, dude. I want to credit my assistant, Mark, who's good at all things. And here we go. Everybody likes a little ass play, dude. You got two everybody likes a little ass plays. I have three ass plays. That's the first one. Here's the second one. Whether it be taking a poop, whether it be a finger, whether it be a tongue, whether it, you know, everybody likes a little ass play. And then the third.

Everybody likes a little ass play. Don't even act like you don't. Perfect. Great job, Mark. Thank you. Thank you to Mark for figuring it out. Mark makes my sound effects machine look like shit. And I can make my sound effects whenever I want.

Yeah. But yours aren't nearly as good as mine. And it's just been on my to-do list forever. I beg to differ. Here's a machine gun. You're an insult to Michael Winslow. Is that his name? Mike Winslow. Yeah, you're an insult to Mike Winslow.

Somewhere Mike Winslow is listening and being like, that sucks. Oh, yeah? Here's my mad dog. That's good. I'll give you that. That's a lot. Hey, what are you doing this weekend? Goat throat?

That's the only cue. Throat coat. Throat coat. Jule, you missed it. We played a really good song called Throat Coat. Wow. I heard Daniel had to read some lines that were- Yes, we missed you. We played a really good song called Throat Coat. Wow. I heard Daniel had to read some lines that were. Yes.

We missed you. How are you feeling? You had quite a cold. So, so much better. I had COVID. Oh, you had the COVID. I just thought you had a cold. No, I had actual COVID.

Oh, it was bad because you seemed like. It was very brutal. I was stalking you on Insta and you looked like you were hurting. It was, it was. Oh man. My sinuses felt like they want to bust out of my face i couldn't like sleep or rest because i was in so much pain i am much much much better now i've tested negative three days in a row that's great

do they know do they well i mean thank goodness you are negative now i mean you can get outside i'm sorry you went through that joelle i bet you it sucked to be in the house for five days straight so actually i was with my parents it was like closer to 10 days um and it was great because you know who your parents get to baby you so i was just like mommy my head and she'd be like i have poor tylenol sweetie don't even worry like thank you so much and then my dad and i just watched movies in his theater all day so for me if you have to be sick, it was in the best place possible. That's great. Well, we're happy to have you back. The show is not the same

without you. I missed you guys. We had to play Throat Goat without you. I'm really glad, though. I think you would have loved it. The audience missed your commentary. Oh, no. Okay, I have a real question to ask, I have a real question to ask.

I have a question to ask because that song is a bop. It's fire. I would love to play it all the time, but you got to really play it. And only certain. It's not really appropriate. Right. I was about to say,

where is it appropriate to play said song? Other than working out by yourself. Other than Cody's ride. Yeah. Okay. Other than Cody's ride yeah okay other than cody's ride you gotta make sure not to put that on in the car while your kids are in the car i don't know i don't think that'll ever make i don't think that'll ever make the car playlist yes that should not be on the car playlist but it is a bop it is a bop so is uh liquid dreams not so much Not so much.

Not so much. That one didn't hold the test of time. No disrespect. No disrespect, O-Town. No disrespect, O-Town. Joel, you missed it. We talked about explicit songs. Did you talk about My Neck, My Back?

That one stands the test of time. That one stands the test of time. That one stands the test of time. That's a classic. That is a classic. Classic naughty song. Oh, my gosh. I mean, any song, well, they didn't get away with it. But I think Window to the Wall is probably the ultimate one.

Like, out of all of them. They played that at my junior high dance. I'm saying they got away with so much, man. So much. That was on the radio. Skeet, skeet, skeet was on the radio. Yeah. From the window. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry, I was like, is window to the wall

a song that I don't know? Till the sweat drips off my balls was on the radio. Oh, boy. What do you think it means, bud? What do you think it means? What do you think it means? It's not intuitive. Fuck your sound effects machine. Does it mean ejaculation? What do you think it It's not intuitive. Fuck your sound effects machine. Does it mean ejaculation? What do you think it means, buddy?

The way you're saying it makes me think it has to do with ejaculation. You nailed it. Until all skeet, skeet, skeet, skeet. How would I know that without looking at it? Is that an urban dictionary? I could look it up. From the wind. No, I don't think. I don't know.

I think skeet, skeet. I think skeet, skeet. Daniel, can you look up? Sorry, Joelle, you're back. Joelle, can you look up the Urban Dictionary definition of skeet skeet skeet? Please, no. I think we established what it is. All right.

Well, I just wanted to hear. They'll phrase it in a dictionary-like way. Like verb. Would you like to hear how it is phrased? Yes. The phrase commonly used when a person is about to unload jism onto their partner. Jism.

Jism. Jism. Jism. Jism. That makes me think that there are people out there that when they're going to unload jism say skit, skit, skit as it's happening?

Oh, that'd be great. That'd be great if that's your battle cry when you bust a knife. If your battle cry is skeet skeet skeet skeet skeet! It's very alarming. Skeet skeet skeet skeet! Or you try to whisper it

and be sexy with it. Skeet skeet skeet. Skeet skeet skeet. Skeet skeet skeet. You're trying to say it romantically all right all right enough of that please i'm not ready to give it up yet i know it's nice to see you are we doing anything for this weekend i have uh do we have any plans to see each other?

I mean, I thought we were getting together, man. I want to make some ribs. I want to eat some food. I don't eat ribs, but you can make them. You don't eat meat at all. I don't eat any meat, no. See, you're lucky. That plant-based diet worked for you.

It didn't necessarily work that great for me. I'm not entirely off fish. I eat fish um i don't eat any animals that aren't living in the sea i'm sorry to my sea spirit uh folks i i have i have i couldn't live without just a little bit of fish well you could have lived i could have lived i could have lived yes're right. There's plenty of people on a vegan diet who are healthy. I tried it. I tried the plant-based diet. You tried it.

And I wound up getting an ultrasound because it was giving me gut pains. Well, I don't know if that's related to your vegan diet. No, it was because once I switched off of just eating all plants. Also eggs. I love eggs. I could never be a full vegan. Eggs. Eggs are good.

Divine. Eggs are important. A hard-boiled egg will make your day. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Did you see that picture Beyonce just posted, Joelle?

Sure fucking did, Zachary. I'm on the text messages the emails i get alerts for her instagram wherever we are whatever we're doing we're gonna be aware of what beyonce is doing she has seen it daniel she is i'm looking at it right now i mean i know i'm not i'm going to say she has blossomed from uh destiny's child to now i zoomed the instagram yes i had to make sure i was like is that the is that the oh oh amazing she's hot amazing so sexy and beautiful. But just strong and fierce too, man. She looks great. It's a holographic.

Is that what you say? Holographic horse? Yeah. It looks holographic, plasticky. I was trying to figure out what actually is happening with it. I think she's sitting on a hologram of a horse. Right, Daniel? You're a hologram expert.

Well, a hologram technically would be non-physical, so she couldn't sit on it well she's beyonce she can sit on anything you know what in that case yep beyonce be like unicorn and out of nowhere a unicorn just comes through a pocket okay it's like a disco thunder horse are you watching at season three, Joelle? I'm not currently. I wanted to binge it, and then I haven't gotten to it yet. I'm so frustrated that nobody I know is watching the show. I'm sure some listeners are, but it is so good. Donald Glover is so talented. Call him by his real name, Lando Calrissian.

I love that show. If you're open to my suggestions Audience You should watch Atlanta And season 3 has been really really good Joel you love TV Joel we never caught up on Obi-Wan Speaking of Star Wars

We never caught up on Obi-Wan A 5 second take because I don't want to bore Zach Holy crap Lil Leia Shit that child can act yeah a five second take because i don't want to bore zach um holy crap yeah little leia shit that child can act like whoa she's doing really good um and then no spoilers but the surprise at the very very end of the show oh amazing i really like what moses did with her character too um i know people struggle with it at first for different reasons I think the end result of that character

I think everybody's if you're not satisfied with the way that ended then you got problems cause that kinda, look I'm gonna be honest that kinda leaked but hold on let me finish a little bit the ending kinda leaked

and you know everybody was in uproar when they heard what the ending was going to be but the way it was executed i think everybody it's kind of hard not to be satisfied with the way that ended you know what i mean i imagine there'll be another season don't you guys it does seem like they because they i think they were calling it like a short at first and And then an experience, this was supposed to be movie one. I read on the interwebs. I read on the interwebs,

which are, is always true that, um, that this was going to be a movie. And then when Han Solo tanked, they shied away from it and, um, and made it a TV series.

I want everybody out there. Listen, even though Han Solo tanked, it's still a good star Wars movie, man. Like for real. Well, you need to call your friend Kathleen Kennedy and tell her.

I think she, I think she knows it too. I think she's well aware of it. Well, she had, she had a very tough time with that film. As you recall, Donald,

she fired our friends, the directors. Yes, no doubt. But I think we should stick to i should i think we should stick to this format that we got going right now y'all like let's stick to that the tv thing is working don't get crazy and put out some bullshit because the fans are screaming for movies movies movies keep the shows going the wait is worth it don't stray away

also last thing and this is the last thing eat these balls Zach well no I'm gonna say one thing and you guys could say I'm bugging or whatever Black Stormtrooper is very familiar in the Star Wars universe

we saw it in we saw that scenario there's another thing that I'm a part of that's very familiar in the Star Wars universe. We saw it in... We saw that scenario. There's another thing that I'm a part of that's very familiar in the Star Wars universe. Stupid Buddy, I'm probably going to get everybody in trouble, we created Bring Your Daughter to Work Day, where Gary the Stormtrooper,

a Stormtrooper I play, brings his daughter to work on two occasions. One, when the blockade runners stop by the Death Star, I mean, by the Star Destroyer. Two, when the speeder containing R2, 3PO, Luke Skywalker, and Obi-Wan gets to the checkpoint and these aren't the droids you're looking for. There's another part also with... Anyway. This was years ago, right? Years ago, before any of these shows came out.

Bring Your Daughter to Work Day. It was a stop-motion. It was a stop-motion. Stop-motion sketch. So what do you think? Very popular. All of these Star Wars shows, Obi-Wan, Bring Your Daughter to Work,

The Mandalorian, Bring Your Daughter to Work, all of these stories are the exact same thing. I just putting it out there face out i'm just putting it out there wait hold up let me throw the elbow on it too just putting it out there the format worked you know where it came from um i think one thing that's true is that they saw that is true they saw the success of baby get your fucking sound effects machine going now eat these bowls zach here we go i i think it's definitely true that they saw the the world go crazy over baby yoda and now they were like baby leia baby everything Baby everything? Everything is baby. Yeah.

Baby Jabba? I was just about to say that. I watched the fuck out of Baby Jabba. They did that already. They had a Baby Jabba? They had a Baby Jabba? Yeah, in Clone Wars, the original movie. No, but nobody watches that show.

That's not true. No, I'm saying I know I have this huge fan base. All of these stories that you're watching right now are coming from the Clone Wars era. I'm just saying mainstream. Okay. All of these stories. I'm watching right now are coming from the Clone Wars era. I'm just saying mainstream. Okay. All of these stories. I'm just saying if you're like me. Obi-Wan Kenobi, all of this that you saw in that show

came from the Clone Wars era. The cartoon I'm talking about, buddy. I know. I'm just telling you that unless you're a mega Star Wars fan, you're probably not watching Clone Wars. You don't have to be. All you have to do is be raised when the Phantom Menace came out.

That's it. All right. Should we talk about this TV show we made a long time ago? I mean, we can. We should. Five, six, seven, eight.

Here's some stories about a show we made about a bunch of doctors and nurses and a janitor who loved to hate. I said here's some stories that we all should know. So gather round to hear our.

Gather round to hear our. Spoke to Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald. I don't remember this episode at all. At all. It's called My Turf War. I remember because Kerry was on it. Of course I remember Kerry Russell, the beautiful, hilarious,

very talented Kerry Russell coming. And I remember Bill directed this episode. I didn't remember that. That's why it's so good. And I... The best part of it... Should we just dive into the best part is that whole sports thing

the is that an espn um fantasy yes stewart scott man you know rest in peace man that was you know that was a testament to how great he was because he changed how we listen to sports what is that explain explain to those of us who don't follow sports or watch ESPN. So sports is always an exciting, you know, when you watch playback, there's always somebody doing commentary that's got to be very exciting and make what you're watching seem like it's, you know, amazing because not everybody likes baseball. Not everybody likes football.

Not everybody likes basketball. So you have somebody who, you somebody who describes what's going on. Right. So this is just to remind people. Just to remind people. In the fantasy, J.D. asked Turk about, hey, tell me about Elliot's friend. He's played by Keri Russell. And he goes into this whole ESPN sort of graphic thing.

Keri's body is spinning. And the ESPN music is playing. It's like he's giving the, and Turk is giving the stats for what's going on. And I imagine they're just copying the exact graphics they would use on ESPN. Yeah, somewhat. It's somewhat like that. But Stewart was the one that changed the way it sounded. He was the one that was doing stuff like, booyah, or, you know, that's cooler than the

other side of the pillow like he would say some of the dopest euphemisms for sport right anyway so that was an oh that was it was called turk's booty breakdown right and and i would like to i i like to think that that was our version of you know giving him a shout out That was really funny and clever. And, you know, Bill watches ESPN every night, I think, or all the time. He loves it. Wimbledon's happening right now, by the way. But it's happened so early. I'm not getting up to watch Wimbledon.

Fuck that. I guess we'll wait till the finals or something and maybe I'll get up. You can watch all of this other stuff. You can watch it in the replay, bud. Is that what you do, Seabare? You know, that's the easiest way to watch it. I know. or something and maybe i'll get up you can watch all of this others watching the replay but is that what you do see bear you know that's the easiest way to watch it i know but i i don't i'm not much of a sports watcher uh is it okay to watch replays yeah of course why not you don't know what the score is are you playing any sport right now um no i would love to play tennis i just don't know

when the gym i'm just at the gym i'm trying to get skinny because i think i got a movie coming up um if if the stars align and i need to be i want to be in good shape for it are you gonna is it an action movie it's not an action movie i don't want to talk about it yet because it's like 95 happening and i will tell you about it when it's a hundred Is it Obi-Wan 2? It's Obi-Wan 2. I play young Jabba. Can you imagine? I'm getting ripped so I can be in another suit, another puppet. No, I miss tennis, though.

I'd love to play with you. Let's go. But anyway, I'd really like to watch Wimbledon. I just see the headlines. I saw that Serena that's out already? Yes. Oh, she's in. Yes. It was shocking. Yeah, to like 110-seeded players. She's a grown-up, man.

Y'all got to remember, she's a grown-up and she's been through injuries and light. She's had babies, all of that stuff, man. She's older than everybody she's playing against right now. But I think they were shocked because she lost to like a, what was the seed? Like a 110. That means nothing, man.

You can't stop time. Time waits for no one. She's like you on the basketball court. You've given up. I don't think she gave up. She showed up to play. No, I'm saying you say you've given up because of your age. You can't play anymore.

She's one of the greatest athletes of all time. Look, keeping it 100. I'm back in the gym. I don't know where this is going to take me. I sent you my gym. I know, but that was – I didn't even know. Listen, man. I didn't even know that –

I love you. I don't know if me and you can work out in the same gym. I think that's weird. We wouldn't work out at the same time. I think it's weird still. Donald comes at 8. Zach comes at 7.30. Why is that weird?

Who cares? Because I found another spot. I'm going to it all right well why don't you say that instead of you don't want to work out at the same gym as me that's stupid me and carmelo anthony will be friends alone that's nice i love carmelo anthony i didn't even know who it was but he was working out at my gym you just knew it was a tall guy huh um i knew it was a tall athlete and then on um my trainer's instagram he posted that it was a tall guy huh um i knew it was a tall athlete and then on um my trainer's instagram he posted that it was carmelo anthony and i was like oh that's who that was that's what's up and then

i tried to send it to donald to be like why don't you come to my gym look at cool people like this guy and he didn't reply anyway i'm back in the gym man i'm gonna try and get these shots up too i'm gonna try and get back in shape i'm'm trying. Look. That's what's up. Listen, I feel like if I go at it right now and I go hard, I feel like if the NBA will have me at the All-Star game, I feel like I could make a nice little splash. Why didn't you do that? Why did you stop doing that?

You were like one of their favorites. Well, because then all of these other famous people started coming out like Chris Brown, Bieber, Kevin Hart. And then, so when that happens, you know. Oh, if you're Donald Faison and Kevin Hart wants to play, you get benched? Right. Well, I don't get benched. I get pushed out of the game. That's just how it goes.

As new celebrities come into play. Well, it's hard to compete with justin bieber i'm wanting to play does he still play i'm sure i don't know if he plays in those games but freaking kevin hart they retired his number from the from the thing um i did remember do you remember he was dude he used to win mvp he wouldn't even have the best games but he was still winning mvp just from being funny, man. I'm not going to lie. Was he good?

He was competitive. Very competitive. Daniel says no. He was fine, but he was really entertaining. Could you beat him one-on-one? That's irrelevant. Whether I could beat him. That does not take away my ability to be a critic. That's not.

Donald, have you ever played basketball with Rick Glassman, the comedian? No, but I hear he's nice. He played with LeBron or against LeBron in high school, he says. I'm sure he got dunked on. I'm sure LeBron James came up down the court and was like, yuck. I heard he's really good. And I did his podcast, and he told me that he got kicked out of Bill's game. For what?

Just smack talking, I guess. Oh. I don't know. I love me some Rick Glassman. He's a funny guy. He's very funny. Very funny guy. I did his podcast.

And see him around if he's coming to your town doing stand-up. He's got some very funny stand-up. We should talk about this show. Yeah, man. Come on. You keep fucking getting off topic. The only thing we've talked about. Let me explain something.

Okay, go ahead. Explain only thing we've talked about. Let me explain something. Okay, go ahead. Explain it. Explain it. Everybody likes a little ass play. Don't even act like you don't. All right, listen. So, Elliot, speaking of ass play, Keith wants to take Elliot's bum with him on vacation. Yeah, that's cute.

And JD reveals that a naked picture of Elliot's bum is still his screensaver. Yes. Sarah and Elliot do have a nice little bum so I can understand JD's rationale. Both bums are spectacular. Yes, let's not

lie. Both bums are nice. We've seen them bopping down. Recently we saw them grinding. We've seen them bopping. Down the same hallway. Recently we saw them grinding on a flagpole in the show. Yes. Very. Turfing, for those of you who don't know, I don't know if it's still medical slang. Back

when we were doing the show, it was still medical slang for when you're trying to find any excuse to refer a patient to a different department. So Donald, excuse me, Turk and Cox are in a turf war, if you will. That's the name of the show, My Turf War, where they're fighting over Lloyd because nobody wants Lloyd, played by the hilarious Mike Schwartz. Everything Mike Schwartz in this episode made me laugh.

It's pretty funny where he was like, you're 40 and you're a delivery man. You got a case of the where did i go wrong z's yeah what about that's fucked up dude it is fucked up but what about when mike schwartz like is pointing to his forearm he goes it's he it hurts here and then he goes to his elbow it skips here and then he goes to his bicep and then it continues here he like, are you serious, Lloyd? He goes, but what about the tingles? Yeah. He says he's got the chest tingles. He was very funny in this episode. It made me think we should have given Mike more to do because he should have been more recurrent.

I mean, he had part and everything. But this was the first time Lloyd ever gets to be the main guest star of the episode. Well, not Kerry Russell's the main guest star, but, you know, second, let's say, guest star. He's very funny. For sure. He's hilarious. The B story was actually really funny too.

I was, I got psyched out. I, and I was on the show. You don't remember it at all. Not even a little bit. I didn't see it coming either. I don't remember, you know, some episodes Donald and I have told you, you are our faithful listeners around the globe this before some we just don't remember doing and

this falls into that for me if you're new to the show though welcome if you're new to the show welcome thank you for joining us this is uh daniel dj daniel and joelle monique hi there's a song we have called joelle monique is down to get down uh we will now play it dan'll hit it get the word out all over the town joelle monique is down to get down no matter what's between your legs tomorrow morning you could be making an ex joelle monique is down to get down oh yeah joelle monique is down to get down speaking of joelle yeah how's everything going with your uh she hasn't had time to be dating she's been down for 10 days that was 10 days ago though okay do you ever chat to that gal that we introduce you to are you friends at least uh we run into each other every now and again but not not really she looks kind of far away

are you out there dating at all, Joelle? Are you looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right? Not currently. Currently, I am just trying to get out of my house. I didn't mean while you've had- You're moving again? Why are you moving again? A saga which boils down to bad neighbors and faulty building.

We had to get out. We're moving at the end of next week. Oh, that's a shame. You weren't there too long. Do you have a good spot? Oh, my God. It has an entire roof deck and a balcony off my room. Absolutely.

We expanded so we have an actual office now so I don't have to work in my bedroom anymore. That's awesome. So I am thrilled. I'm very excited. Could it be called a blessing in disguise? Certain to me. Absolutely.

Maybe it's not even wearing a disguise. Maybe it's just a blessing. Just a full out blessing. Yes, I'm excited. I can't wait to decorate and get cozy. And yeah, it's good. You deserve that, Joelle. Thank you. Great. We're gonna we got another special

episode coming up uh yeah we do we have to figure the logistics out of that sorry to be cryptic audience i don't want to ruin any of the surprise don't ruin anything we're almost done with season six by the way we have four more episodes in season six and uh I don't mean to, you know, express concern, but we're running out of episodes of the show. We really have to figure out what we're going to do next. We're going to have to figure out. I think I don't want the podcast to be over. I will say that.

I don't want it to be over either. I like checking in. I like talking. I like Daniel and Joelle. I like Daniel and Joelle too. I like the community we've built. Why don't we just start all over? Can't we just start all over?

Run it back. Oh my gosh. That would be hilarious. Relisten of the podcast. Another one. Oh no. Another one. Dude, remember?

Remember when we used to do that? Another one. Another one. We should- Run it back. We could get super meta as we've said and just just do a re-listen of the podcast of the rewatch i want you guys to be the new ebert and roper i want you to thumbs up and thumbs down no because then i gotta be in the shit sometimes we don't want to be in the place to ever talk

negatively about other artists other artists man i get it i remember i yo look i remember when i used to be like i and i still do it now. I didn't enjoy it and stuff like that. But I remember when I used to be like, don't see that movie. Now I'm like, please, you know. Yeah, I don't want to. This is my opinion. This is, you know. I don't want to poo-poo any artist's work.

Although I just did Brett Goldstein's podcast. He has a podcast called Films to be Buried With. And you had to say, what movie do you think is it is horrible what was the worst movie ever seen so i chose a deep cut um meatballs two do you remember meatballs one two i like meatballs two with the alien yeah but do you know what happened me ted this is like me ted you know i love you so much we have the exact same fucking references so many people would never have seen meatballs two meatballs one was a very wonderful bill murray movie for kids and it was incredible and then and then meatballs two came out it was at the height of the et phenomenon

and they obviously didn't have bill murray for the sequel so they decided that the kids at the camp stumble across an alien that looked a whole lot like E.T. It was like E.T. but just a little bit askew enough to not get sued. Meathead. And his name was Meathead. No, that's what they called him. Meathead one day and he was like Me-Ted. And no, he said

his name was Ted. They were like, what's your name? He said Me-Ted. And they called him Meathead. Meathead. Perfect. So imagine you have a hit movie, and it's time to make the sequel. That was a great movie. And you can't get the star. And it's the height of- He had magic powers and everything.

And it's the height of E.T. And you go, wait, here's the pitch. Instead of Bill Murray, we have our own E.T. And we just put that in the movie. Wait, hold up. Do we still go back to the camp? We're at the camp, but there's no Bill Murray anymore. The kids stumble across

E.T., but not E.T. Do we get the theme song? Yes. We still get, are you ready for the summer? Are you ready for a good time? I love you. I love that you know that reference. Of course, Brett Goldstein had no idea what I was talking about.

No. All right. Let's talk about the show. American classic. Let's get back. So we said, Kerry Russell is here. Kerry Russell is here.

And that was a pretty epic cold open, by the way, with the wind. Oh yes. We should give Bill directing props because that whole sequence with the two women screaming and it's like the movie Tornado, right? There's literally a cow flying, a toy cow flying across the screen. And I'm sure lots of stuntmen making us look good. But that looked really well.

That was really good. That was well done. Yeah, it was very climactic it was very climactic at the end too with the you know and all we had to do was show them the picture of the baby and then they oh oh baby which is literally me now somehow somehow when i see a baby now are you like oh look at the baby look at the baby those cheeks i remember those days. Those are good old days. Yeah.

You're like, I don't want to see another baby. I don't mind the baby. It's when they become kids that it becomes a problem, man. Well, it seems like you have two very happy children right now. So you're good.

They are very happy, but they're also very, very spoiled, man. Yes. And it's because of me. And it's, you know, I know that and it must be hard to say no to your children i recently was around a young child and and uh

it made it was the child was having a bad day or a bad moment and i was like maybe i don't maybe i don't have kids i mean if you ever if you ever are thinking about having kids, I suggest you go and hang out with somebody who has kids. No, because that's going to make me go nowhere. No, because if you really want to have kids, you'll be like, I don't give a shit. I still want to do it. If it's mine, it'll be different, obviously.

But when you're around a kid that's being naughty and the parents aren't rectifying it or giving the child consequences and you're watching a kid just stomp and run the room, it can make one who doesn't have kids go, maybe it's not for me. It could, unless you really want to have kids. If you really want to have kids. Because I remember when Casey and I were trying to have children and we were around kids that were misbehaving.

We didn't give a shit. We still found the humor in it and laughed about it. Right now that it's our kids doing that shit. It ain't funny. No, there's nothing funny about any of it. And like, I know it's hard.

I see as someone who's never, who only has a dog, I see how hard it is, but you know what you still, I still want to be like, Oh, my God, I know nothing. But this kid needs a time out. I know one thing. This kid needs a time out.

Yeah, them things don't work. Time out works for that moment in time. Guess what's going to happen? You're going to be like, you need another time out about 15 minutes later. You can't give out too many time outs. They'll spend the whole day in time out. They'll spend the whole day in the room. It's crazy, man. Did you see that

viral video of the little girl? This is old, but I think Casey sent it to me of that little girl being like, let me tell you something. Oh my God. She's in time out. I literally just saw that. It's so funny. You just saw that? I saw it a few years ago, but Casey just sent it to me. That girl is so naughty, but so hilarious. let me tell you linda yeah she goes let me tell you something linda that's not my name yeah and the teacher goes my name is not linda

you saw that donald yeah i did she goes let me tell you something linda my name is not linda not amused clearly gotten that exact attitude before it's like yeah no it's just like you sometimes have places that you gotta be you gotta get to work you know what i mean they're things that you gotta do in order to ensure that these motherfuckers grow up to be healthy and happy and have food and and these motherfuckers are throwing monkey wrenches in your timetable. And it's like, yo! And you can't lose it.

Because when my parents used to lose this shit on me, I remember being like, that's fucked up. You don't have to lose your shit. So I try not to lose my shit on my kids. But sometimes I can't help it. Sometimes I'm like, damn it! I will fuck you up right here and right now. Get in the car.

You know what I mean? Like, it's just what it is, yo. All right, we're going to take a break. And when we come back, we are going to actually focus on the TV show Scrubs. Hey, my name's Jay Shetty, and I'm the host of On Purpose. I just had a great conversation with Michael B. Jordan, Hey, my name's Jay Shetty and I'm the host of On Purpose.

I just had a great conversation with Michael B. Jordan and you can listen to it right now. Michael is known for his performances in both film and television. His breakout role was in Fruitvale Station, playing Oscar Grant, which earned him widespread praise and numerous award nominations. widespread praise and numerous award nominations. His portrayal of Killmonger in Marvel's Black Panther, one of my favorites, further solidified his status as one of Hollywood's leading actors, earning him widespread acclaim for his complex and compelling performance. In our conversation, Michael really opens up. You're going to love listening to it, and I can't wait for you to check it out. The closest to getting what you want is always the hardest. It's always the feeling when you're getting ready.

People give up right before they get what they've always wanted to get. People quit. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Imagine you ask two people the same exact set of seven questions.

I'm Minnie Driver, and this was the idea I set out to explore in my podcast, Minnie Questions. This year, we bring a whole new group of guests to answer the same seven questions, including actress and star of the mega hit sitcom Friends, Courtney Cox. You can't go around it, so you just go through it. This is a roadblock. It's going to catch you down the road. Go through it. Deal with it. Comedian, writer, and star of the series Catastrophe, Rob Delaney. I shouldn't feel guilty about my son's death.

He died of a brain tumor. It's part of what happens when your kid dies. Intellectually, you'll understand that it's not your fault, but you'll still feel guilty. Old rock icon, Liz Phair. That personal disaster wrote Guyville. So everything comes out of a dead end. And many, many more. Join me on season three of Many Questions

on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. Professional dancer Cheryl Burke has been part of Dancing With The Stars since the very beginning. 26 seasons of the samba, the rumba and the cha-cha. 24 partners, 6 finals and 2 mirrorball trophies. She knows all the secrets, the behind the scenes arguments and the affairs, the flings, the flirting, and the fighting. It's time to tell it all on her new podcast, Sex, Lies, and Spray Tans.

We'll take you all the way back to season one and up through today for the dance floor drama like you wouldn't believe. Former partners, co-stars, friends, and frenemies will join Cheryl each week. Listen to Sex, Lies, and Spray Tans on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. It's Chelsea Handler. And if you listen to my podcast, Dear Chelsea, you know that I love making space for women to share their stories. And that is why I'm excited to be part of Women Take the Mic, iHeartRadio's celebration of women who make music music influence change and create culture

all month long your favorite voices from talk radio music and podcasting will highlight the remarkable achievements made by women and discuss the most significant issues facing us today search women take the mic to listen to a collection of international women's day episodes from iheart's top podcasts, including Angela Yee's Lip Service, The Psychology of Your Twenties, and Dear Chelsea. It is a great way to support women and discover your new favorite show.

Listen to Women Take the Mic on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back. Wait, you're going to watch all of the spider-mans no he's talking about all of the marvel universe in order just like reliving reliving that magic again that's a lot of hours oh yeah but yeah that's a that's a commitment that's that is one one that's what we should do zach no i'd rather do different strokes

That's funny Alright what about if we We have to pick a sitcom I thought it almost happened This is what we need to narrow it down to A sitcom That has an overlapping audience With Scrubs

I don't mean situation. I don't mean audience. I mean, you know, a half-hour comedy that has an overlapping audience with scrubs. Okay? So like Friends, The Office, Frasier. I don't think they've done The Office yet. What about Frasier?

Well, you had yelled once that you didn't want to do a show with no black people, and now you're suggesting Frasier. But that has two gay people. It has two black people. And now you're suggesting Frasier. It has two gay people. So it cancels out. I'd rather do Community, which everyone says is Scrubs-esque. Or what's the other one? Parks and Rec.

Oh, Parks and Rec is so good. Which has Donald Glover. I think Community has Donald Glover. Oh, sorry. See? Parks and Rec. Those are two shows I've never seen. Chris Pine.

I've never seen a single episode of either show That's what I meant Chris Pratt I've never seen a single episode of either show And people think they're funny And Aubrey Plaza Which of those two do you guys like better? Better?

That's a tough one I think you would appreciate Community more Because it's got more there's so many film references a lot it's very cinematic like it's it's a very cinematic television show especially for a half-hour comedy um who's the star of it joel joel mckale joel mckale and chevy chase yeah there's a of people. That was like a real ensemble cast. And Jillian. Joe McHale's character was the JD, right?

Jillian. Yes. No, not Jillian. Jillian's really good. I think she's a great actress. I love the show Love, which you should watch. I've not said it before. It's so good.

Judd Apatow produced it. It's called Love. Jillian Jacobs. Jillian Jacobs. She's really talented. All right, Don, let's focus on Scrubs. Ready? We should watch maybe a Judd Apatow produced it. It's called Love. Jillian Jacobs. Jillian Jacobs. She's really talented. All right, Don, let's focus on Scrubs. Ready? We should watch maybe a Judd Apatow movie.

We should do all Apatow movies. The only thing about doing movies, I just want you to realize, is it's going to be hard to get through in an hour and a half, and we're going to have to take the time to watch and notate a movie every week, which for our schedules is tricky. But if we're doing it the way we do this show, we could just watch it through, take some notes here and there, and talk about it. I just think we're both working a lot these days, and watching a 22-minute thing and doing notes on it is easier than watching a two-hour movie and doing it. And also, we barely get through a 22 minute show in an hour and a half here because of all the digressions

that you do. Like right now. Everybody likes a little ass flay. Don't even act like you don't. Okay, ready? Let's focus. So Elliot. You forgot about Beard Fassay and his face full of macaroons. That's true, yes.

And Kelso Kelso is like An amazing Macaroni Flicker Flicker player Jamie's jealous Of the relationship

The bus driver What about this line For us honkies It's a very important dance I don't I mean like You, it's an important dance for all. The freaking sprinkler. I don't even know the bus driver. I mean, as a honky, I didn't know that.

Oh, you're not a honky. I thought honky was just slang for white person. Sure. Okay. Is it not? Is it not? should we look it up on earth daniel can you look up honky here we go here it goes no but did you know the dance the bus driver i didn't even know it i never heard of it before all right maybe it's before our time because maybe maybe it's a bill joke he's a little bit older than us so jd's jealous of the relationship between elliot and

her yes i hated gd in this episode i really he pissed me off this guy because he because now he's tipped he's just he's torturing this woman's life you know well it's clear let her be now he's catching feelings again yeah now he's catching feelings again and you know why because he sees them getting closer and closer and then of course we know that's not why that's not why that's not why they had a moment where they hung out and he was cheering her up because her boyfriend was out of town it's not because it's not because they were getting closer it has nothing to do with if that were the case then jd would be an ultimate asshole. Okay, but you don't think he's playing mind games on this poor fucking woman?

Absolutely he does, but that's because he wants to be alone with her. He wants to have his cake and eat it too. Here's what happens. He's a cake eater. We all eat cake, don't we? Here's what happens. Her boyfriend goes out of town. The two of them have a connection and he makes her laugh and he's like wow that was a lot of fun we should do that tonight she's like i can't do it

tonight i got shit to do and he's like oh okay at that moment her best friend comes in town from out of town right from out from from from back in a day right comes in a town yeah right she all of a sudden says you know what let's go out tonight we should do something jd's hurt by that yes and so because of that and because of the little bit of feelings that he's kind of caught he does the ultimate sabotage which he does a lie that is like the biggest punk i know move ever in the history of why would you ever it was such a douchey thing to do out of petty jealousy and insecurity like that's something that look i get it sometimes people do things that you know are better than what you

were able to do at that moment but that doesn't mean you go there and freaking take them down no and also she hasn't seen this friend in so long and JD makes up a lie that would make any person go oh well then fuck her and that's what happens

then Keri Russell what's her character's name I gotta's what happens. Then Keri Russell, what's her character's name? I got to stop referring to her as Keri Russell. Can you guys look that up for me, please? But anyway, Keri Russell's character has this very bizarre idea, because she's sort of a party girl, that we, J.D., and she start making out at the bar. But it can't get serious. Called Mackin.

Yeah, well, you didn't use to Mack back in the day no i'm just saying i wouldn't that we kept using the term mackin and i didn't uh melody is her name thank you um i we don't even use the expression mackin anymore really do we remember do you wonder if the kids do it well my kids use the term tackle kissing. Oh, my goodness. You told us that deal. Did you find the dictionary definition of honky, the urban dictionary? Oh, yeah, I did. What does it say? Well, I looked up a couple of things because I was curious if this was actually true, because I've gotten a couple of different things.

One is that, yes, it's just a pejorative term for a white person, pejorative term for a white person, but alsoative term for a white person. But also somebody said that it also potentially came from slavery days because slave owners would honk a horn and they would call that person a honky. That is not substantiated anywhere else other than Urban Dictionary.

Well, I know where cracker comes from. We've discussed the origin of cracker. There's also the term may have begun in the meatpacking plants of Chicago, according to Robert Hendrickson, author of Encyclopedia of Word and Phrase Origins, black workers in Chicago meatpacking plants picked up the term from white workers and began applying it indiscriminately to all whites. Okay. Well, I think we'll stick with pejorative term for white people.

Yeah, we'll go with that. All right. Anyway. Bounce. Am I a hunky? We both are, Zach. I mean, if I were... If the shoe fits.

We can only hope to be Macklemore's and at least be a cold-ass honky, as it were. Can I have that for my soundboard, Dan? Am I a honky? You guys should use honky. You guys should use honky the way black people use it. Oh, so when I see Dan and I'm like, use honky. You guys should use honky the way black people use it. Oh, so when I see Dan and I'm like, my honky. Yeah. What's up, honky?

Oh, no. Listen, honky. I'm going to be covering my eyes on that one. That's how y'all should do it. That would be the best day ever. That would be best day ever if y'all went out into the street and did that shit. And every time y'all say, what's up, my honky? If y'all did that shit, that would be the best.

Oh, my God, I laugh so hard. I would laugh. I don't think young people today know the term. I feel like it's faded out of existence. Ain't nothing like Red Fox saying honky. Yeah. Red Fox used to love saying honky. He said it all the time

George Jefferson didn't he Yes George Jefferson said it way more than Red Fox did George Jefferson Oh my god we should re-watch the Jeffersons I love you Put it on the list Put it on the list Joel

Here's my idea here's my pitch right What about Sanford and Son Yeah I just That shit's my idea here's my pitch right what about sanford and son we should be watching sanford and son yeah i just i just that's it's funny man it's funny i promise i know but i think the jefferson's is is more accessible this is the only problem with the jefferson's and all right so look it's at some point sitcoms got so crazy that everything happened to these motherfuckers yeah well but no like different strokes different strokes everything happened to either Arnold

Willis, Kimberly or Dudley and then Sam came along later and then things happened to Sam same thing with the facts of life remember when they met Nancy Reagan same thing with the facts of life the facts of life Nancy Reagan. Remember when they met Nancy Reagan? Same thing with the facts of life. The facts of life.

There's a tonight on a very special episode of the facts of life. Every week of the facts of life. At one point, didn't she? They tried to recruit her. She gets sex trafficked. Yeah, she gets sex trafficked. Okay. I feel like the Jeffersons falls into that category at that era. Sanford and Son, not so much, man.

I feel like some of the issues that they go through were like, we got to get the couch through the door. I really want to watch Sanford and Son, man. I feel like we'll laugh really hard. You're making me want to watch it. But I just think Joelle will make a master list. Here's one idea, right? Here's a good pitch. Ready? Yes.

Hey, my name's Jay Shetty and I'm the host of On Purpose. I just had a great conversation with Michael B. Jordan and you can listen to it right now. Michael is known for his performances in both film and television. His breakout role was in Fruitvale Station, playing Oscar Grant, which earned him widespread praise and numerous award nominations. His portrayal of Killmonger in Marvel's Black Panther, one of my favorites, further solidified his status as one of Hollywood's leading actors, earning him widespread acclaim for his complex and compelling performance. In our conversation, Michael really opens up. You're going to love

listening to it, and I can't wait for you to check it out. The closest to getting what you want is always the hardest. It's always the feeling when you're getting ready. People give up right before they get what they've always wanted to get. People quit. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Imagine you ask two people the same exact set of seven questions. I'm Minnie Driver, and this was the idea I set out to explore in my podcast, Minnie Questions. This year, we bring a whole new group of guests to answer the same seven questions,

including actress and star of the mega hit sitcom Friends, Courtney Cox. You can't go around it, so you just go through it. This is a roadblock. It's going to catch you down the road. Go through it. Deal with it. Comedian, writer, and star of the series Catastrophe, Rob Delaney. I shouldn't feel guilty about my son's death. He died of a brain tumor. It's part of what happens when your kid dies. Intellectually, you'll understand that it's not your fault, but you'll still feel guilty. That personal disaster wrote Guyville.

So everything comes out of a dead end. And many, many more. Join me on season three of Mini Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. Professional dancer Cheryl Burke has been part of Dancing with the Stars

since the very beginning. 26 seasons of the samba, the rumba, and the cha-cha. 24 partners, six finals, and 2 mirrorball trophies. She knows all the secrets, the behind the scenes arguments and the affairs, the flings, the flirting and the fighting. It's time to tell it all on her new podcast, Sex, Lies and Spray Tans. We'll take you all the way back to season one and up through today for the dance floor drama like you wouldn't believe. Former partners, co-stars, friends, and frenemies will join Cheryl each week.

Listen to Sex, Lies, and Spray Tans on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. It's Chelsea Handler, and if you listen to my podcast, Dear Chelsea, you know that I love making space for women to share their stories. your podcasts. from talk radio, music, and podcasting will highlight the remarkable achievements made by women and discuss the most significant issues facing us today. Search Women Take the Mic to listen to a collection of International Women's Day episodes

from iHeart's top podcasts, including Angela Yee's Lip Service, The Psychology of Your Twenties, and Dear Chelsea. It is a great way to support women and discover your new favorite show. Listen to Women Take the Mic on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Here's a good pitch. Ready? Yeah. Yes. What's the one with Freddie Prinze senior Chico and the man come on let's do it Chico

Night Court I love Night Court cheers they're not doing it the office is already doing their shit the fucking friends I'm sure somebody's doing that shit too no one's doing it no one's doing the friends yet

none of the cast is doing friends let's see friends. I'm sure somebody's doing that shit too. No one's doing it. No one's doing the friends yet. None of the cast is doing friends. Let's see if... I suggested friends to you and you said there's no black people in it. You didn't want to do it. It's true! Even though I heard that one of the creators of Friends just gave money. Yeah, made a hefty donation. She was holding on to that

guilt for a while and all of a sudden it amassed a lot of money towards a donation. Hey, listen. Here's an idea. Joelle, what do you think about this? Listening. We narrow it down to, let's say, six shows.

And for the audience, we live do the pilots. Oh. And we see which pilot we all like the most and which one we want to pursue. And we can also, and we can also maybe even do a poll with the audience. That's not fair. Why? Well,

first of all, the friends pilot is one of the best pilots you'll ever see. So you can't base it on like some of these pilots are so good. Well, the smartest one to do would be friends. You know why? Because it's the most popular. It's the most popular one probably with our audience it connects yes so you if you want the one that the most people have actually watched my wife would love that the only thing is the only

thing is i mean i grew up in new york city and I can't relate to the size of that apartment. We'll create a black corner where you can tell us how it really would have been. Yes. How about this? How about this? How about this? How about we do Friends,

and then the black corner is we do the Living Single version. We play Living Single also. So we do Living Single first. How about once a month we do living single first. How about every, how about every, once a month, once a month we do, once a month we do 227. Oh my God. How about we do living single

and friends at the same time? Pilot episode of living single. I don't want to watch living single. Why? Because it's friends and it's black people? Is that the premise?

I never, I don't know anything about it. That's what it is. Living single came before friends and they saw the success of living single and they were literally like we can make friends Literally the exact same shit Literally a lot of people same relationship arcs. Oh really?

apartment building two people don't live in the apartment building two four people do All right, well do you like me? Do you like my concept do you like my concept and got a fly ass fucking theme song also all right listen here's my pitch is that we narrow it down off air to like six or so shows and then we and then we do the pilot episode for the audience. And then we, as a group, find which show we think we should do. We don't have to include the audience if you don't want, Donald, because maybe that would just friends would win. I'm saying we could also, Joelle could set up a website

where they could vote for which one they want us to do. I want the audience to be a part of this because. Okay. So, Joel, will you look into setting up a website where they can vote? They are the ones that will be listening. We do have say, though.

I'm sorry. We do have say, but yeah. No, we will. Yeah, because if they say- If they say they want us to do- If we don't love what won, we can still overrule them. I would like to-

I'm not going to lie. I would like to do either like Xena, Warrior Princess- Ooh. We're not doing that. Or Hercules. No. Young Hercules with Ryan Gosling. Young Hercules.cules. Young Hercules with Ryan Gosling.

Young Hercules. What about Young Hercules, Ryan Gosling? What about Land of the Lost, the original? Fuck yeah, come on, what's up? Let's go. Let's go. Hell yeah, I remember that with the fucking sleaze stacks. That show was so trippy. Marshall, Will,

and Holly. Go ahead. On a routine expedition comes the greatest earthquake ever known. And they go down to things. Do you remember the rest? To the land of the lost. Oh, that was fire oh land

of the lost oh god amazing why did you why did you end on such a horrible

note listen if you're listening and you have no idea what we're talking about will you please go on youtube

and look at the original land of the lost just watch a clip to see how fucking trippy this show was that we grew up on. It was about Marshall, Will, and Holly. And they were like

on some routine expedition. Now you're just speaking the theme song. They were on a routine expedition. When the greatest earthquake ever known happens. And they go falling into a cliff. Down a waterfall into the land of the lost. Where they were stuck. Yes.

Didn't they do a remake, Joel? Yes, they did. Yeah, don't watch the remake. I'm not talking about the remake. We're talking about the original show. Can you tell me what year the original show aired so I can tell our listeners? It's got to be the 70s. It's definitely the 70s.

And whoever wrote this show was high as balls. All right. So you were in an air band with Lloyd. I haven't left the first page of my notes, by the way. But anyway, Lloyd says, weren't we in an air band? And then he shows off his air drumming skills, which was very funny. Yes. And then he goes, I think we were.

The way he says that last button, he kind of sounds like, mine are his. First him, then you. Yeah, that's Mike's intonation. Hey, the janitor torments the pediatrics ward as a ghost. The kid's ward, yeah. And he's the ghost that hates spills. Did you notice who that kid was?

Okay, so we got two make-ups. I guess the dude that won the Academy Award for CODA was the dad. Oh, yeah. I thought that may have been the case, and I thought we fucked up that up. Plenty of people on the internet said,

I can't believe they didn't say this. All right i'm sorry internet i'm sorry uh i should be purged um it's the it was the the the star of coda okay and what's the other one and i think that's the kid the kid in the bed i think that's zach or cody one of those two oh one of the sprouts kids one of the sprouts one of the sprouts Can you look that up for me? Sure. Anyway, so the janitor haunts the pediatric ward, and the little boy says, Oh, no, I spilled. I don't want the ghost who ate spills to come after me.

I think that's either Zach or Cody, that kid right there. I think it is. And the janitor is pissed that the kids get to eat ice cream after they have their tonsils out, because when he had his out, he had to have hot coffee and granola bars. And it was hot and scratchy. The janitor had the worst parents ever. He had a cage also. He had a cage.

Yes. He lived in a cage. What was it like kissing Keri Russell? Do you remember? I've always thought she was so beautiful and um such a good actress i i don't i remember being uh being excited that i got to smooch her do you remember that rant that you did when you're leaving the bar after you get uh i i i don't fucking hilarious i don't remember but it went on a long time.

Obviously, Bill liked that because I just kept it. It was the most awkward, long moment. With the $100. With the $100, Bill. Kept coming back. And then you're like, I'm doing it. I'm going to pay $100 for a. One appletini. Which, quite frankly, was really easy on the teeny.

Was light on the teeny. Was light on the teeny. Was light on the teeny. Yeah, was light on the teeny. Yeah. His child's name was William Brent from Lab Rats, which is a Disney TV show. Nice. Did you know the show Lab Rats? Wasn't that a movie too?

Mm-hmm. It's from your kid's generation, so I thought you might know it. Then we see the ghost in the background while jd and and well he got rollerblade he got so he could float so he could float and there's a whole scene it's very funny there's a whole scene in the foreground jd and elliot are having a conversation and in the background through the glass window you just see the ghost tormenting the pediatrics ward. Yes. As the janitor floats around. Yes.

Shalina has a cameo in the bar. Elliot, is it Elliot or Elliot makes some jokes. Right. At JD that it would, that woman wouldn't touch you unless she had eight beers. Is that Elliot? Something like that, yeah. And then they cut to a beautiful woman.

That was Shalina, who was— Also the mermaid. Also the mermaid and Sarah's stand-in. The mermaid was out like splash, I guess. Yes. And the whole Shalina side story. She's a mermaid that's in town and has legs because she's out of the water. Yes.

Kelso calls you Dr. Turkleberry? That made me laugh. Well, it's funny. What was really funny is that this whole thing, I got duped because I really believed that Cox was being a dick. Like, Cox is always, like, I even think, I think most people that watched this episode was like, well, that's Cox being a dick, like Cox has always, like I even think, I think most people that watched this episode was like, well, that's Cox being Cox. And, you know, Carla stands up to him for her husband

and makes him feel guilty when really, but that's what this whole episode's about, the guilt you feel after you do someone wrong, right? And Cox feels really guilty. And it turns out that these cats were playing a trick on him. And what my favorite part about it was, at the end of it, Turk finally says to him, yo, don't fuck with me ever again, dude. Yeah.

If you ever fuck with me, this is what it's going to be like. Yeah, Turk has a big moment. I promise you, I am not the one. Yeah, fuck with JD. Fuck with JD, don't fuck with me. Don't do it with me play lotto you got a lot more chances of winning

by the way Mickhead's a surgeon did you know that yeah for some reason I was surprised that Mickhead was a surgeon you slap Mickhead on the ass when you get the file when you get the surgery by the way even Turk first of all is very funny the way so Turk tricks Cox because what he did was he just put, he just in the skin,

which is still fucked up that he even did this, but in the skin he just put some thread to make it look like he did surgery on his arm. Yeah, and then Lloyd pulls it out. And then Lloyd pulls the string out like, oh, no scar. He goes, wow, cool, no scar. But I laughed the way that everyone came together, Turk, Kelso, Carla, to trick Cox and even Lloyd by setting up a TV of a heart surgery and showing it to him. And Turk says, Lloyd, Lloyd says, what's that? And Turk is behind a curtain.

And he said, Lloyd Lloyd that's your shoulder sack and Lloyd goes dude while he's lying in surgery watching it on the screen I don't remember this shit at all but Mike really looked like he was watching TV too he's sitting there really

enjoying it he loved it and then you fixed his at all. I don't remember it at all. But Mike really looked like he was watching TV too. He's sitting there really enjoying it. Yeah. He loved it. And then you fixed his whole condition because psychosomatically he thought he'd been healed. Yeah. Great. It was very funny. Very funny.

And then I'm embarrassed to say maybe not embarrassed. I was surprised to say that I got full goosebumps when Keith proposed. Did you? Nice. Yeah. He was so sweet. I was surprised to say that I got full goosebumps when Keith proposed. Did you? Nice. He was so sweet. I love the fact

that he went to that. Scrubs is so funny. You know they're going to have a romantic moment when they put that fucking filter on the lens. Yeah. When everything gets soft.

Everything's so soft. They tipped it. Bill, not to critique your directing at all, which was very, very good in this episode, but you did tip the moment

a little bit because Elliot, before even Keith comes home, they got that filter on the lens. Oh, there's something super romantic about to happen. Something, something softy. But I did. I got goosebumps all over my body when Keith proposed. It was very romantic. He said, I didn't go away on a business trip. I went to go ask your father for your hand in marriage.

Yeah, what business does Keith have? What business? He is an intern. He probably said he had a conference. No, he's not. Oh, is he still an intern? I thought he... He's a motherfucking intern.

I forgot what he said. Did he say he was going to a conference or some shit? I don't know. I don't know. If it was a business trip, we should have known right then and there. We should have known better. But anyway, it was very romantic. He instead went to

where Elliot's from, which is Connecticut, I believe. And since we've established that this is definitely Los Angeles, that's a far trip. Keith went to Connecticut

to ask for, nowadays he could have zoomed. How romantic though. Zoom, zoom, zoom. It's not as romantic as showing up on the front stoop of the woman

you want to marry's parents door and saying may I have your daughter's hand in marriage and they said yes yeah well Elliot's a cat

we've seen we've seen we've seen her parents we know how crazy her parents are too yeah but but he's he's what they want

he's like a an Aryan doctor do you think elliot's mom came on to him um she definitely had a drink and flirted because you know elliot's mom did everybody now you know what's going to happen because jd's such a twisted i don't even have to know, remember the episodes to know he's going to fucking sabotage this shit. He's going to pull a graduate shit. Yes, he's going to do some graduate shit.

He's going to do some graduate shit. Bang on the glass. No! Fuck your sound effects machine. Alright, we're going to take a quick break. Yeah, Donald, do your sound effects. Somewhere Michael Winslow is kicking the wall.

We haven't had a guest in a while who's not Rob Macchio, and Joelle is here to save the day. We'll be right back. Hey, my name's Jay Shetty, and I'm the host of On Purpose. I just had a great conversation with Michael B. Jordan, and you can listen to it right now. Michael is known for his performances in both film and television. His breakout role was in Fruitvale Station, playing Oscar Grant, which earned him widespread praise and numerous award nominations. His

portrayal of Killmonger in Marvel's Black Panther, one of my favorites, further solidified his status as one of Hollywood's leading actors, earning him widespread acclaim for his complex and compelling performance. In our conversation, Michael really opens up. You're going to love listening to it, and I can't wait for you to check it out. The closest to getting what you want is always the hardest. It's always the feeling when you're getting ready. People give up right before they get what they've always wanted to get. People quit.

Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Imagine you ask two people the same exact set of seven questions. I'm Minnie Driver, and this was the idea I set out to explore in my podcast, Minnie Questions. This year, we bring a whole new group of guests to answer the same seven questions, including actress and star of the mega hit sitcom Friends, Courtney Cox. You can't go around it, so you just go through it. This is a roadblock. It's going to catch you

down the road. Go through it. Deal with it. Comedian, writer, and star of the series Catastrophe, Rob Delaney. I shouldn't feel guilty about my son's death. He died of a brain tumor. It's part of what happens when your kid dies. Intellectually, you'll understand that it's not your fault, but you'll still feel guilty. Alt-rock icon, Liz Phair. That personal disaster wrote Guyville.

So everything comes out of a dead end. And many, many more. Join me on season three of Many Questions on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Seven questions, limitless answers. Professional dancer Cheryl Burke has been part of Dancing with the Stars

since the very beginning. 26 seasons of the Samba, the Rumba and the Cha-Cha, 24 partners, six finals and two Mirrorball trophies. She knows all the secrets, the behind-the-scenes arguments

and the affairs, the flings, the flirting and the fighting. It's time to tell it all on her new podcast, Sex, Lies and Spray Tans. We'll take you all the way back to season one and up through today for the dance floor drama like you wouldn't believe. Former partners, co-stars, friends and frenemies will join Cheryl each week. Listen to Sex, Lies and Spray Tans on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. All month long, your favorite voices from talk radio, music and podcasting will highlight the remarkable achievements made by women and discuss the most significant issues facing us today. Search Women Take the Mic to listen to a collection of International Women's Day episodes from iHeart's top podcasts, including Angela Yee's Lip Service, The Psychology of Your 20s and Dear Chelsea. It is a great way to support women and discover your new favorite show. Listen to Women Take the Mic on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back! And we're back! All right, Jewel, bring in the guests. Play the music, Daniel. We got a caller

Who gave us a holler We can talk, start a war, Sing, show tunes, you know, like a baller Smoke some jazz cabbage Maybe talk about the episode So come on, Joelle, let's get the show on Ladies and gentlemen, give it up Maybe talk about the episode So come on, Joelle, let's get the show on the road Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Sarah Charles!

What? You're muted. She's muted. What? Oh my God. What up, yo? Donald, you organized this? I didn't organize this.

Who organized this? Just me and Sarah. Oh. It's just Joelle and I. Hey, girl. Should I say this might have been my most seamless beginning yet? Yes, I was muted, but. And you're recording.

Oh, my God. You were muted, but you recorded. Are you trapped in an elevator again? No, but man, I'm in Portugal, so it's really late. So I'm already a couple glasses of wine in. What are you doing in Portugal? She's on a family vacation, right? I am.

I'm here with 12 family members. And you guys are always teasing me about having a ridiculous travel adventure. I don't think this is, like, particularly unique right now in the world because travel is insane for everyone. Yes. And by the way, Canadians are coming out in droves talking about how particularly bad Canada is, Sarah. Okay. So I mean, everywhere is bad, but I just happened to see in the news that a lot of Canadian famous people were saying, what the fuck Air Canada, right? Yeah. So we were flying 12 of us, six of whom were children, two of whom are my parents. And we left Vancouver, hour on the runway, not a big deal. Get to Montreal, late, not a big deal. They say they're holding the flight, fantastic news. And they say to everyone

on the flight, can you please keep your seats so that everyone running to their connecting flights can get to the front of the plane? So we do that. And all of a sudden, one of the flight attendants starts yelling at someone saying, you're breaking our transport Canada rules. You shouldn't have crossed this line. And they were like, oh, I thought we were supposed to come to the front. So someone's starting having a panic attack. Then they say, accidentally, the door at the back of the plane was opened. So now we're going to load off the back. And now everybody's standing up. So they can only load off like 100 people at a time. And you have to get on a shuttle. And since we had to go to international instead of domestic, now we've got a shuttle all the way back.

So we get into this shuttle about an hour later. We're standing on the plane for like an hour. And everyone's yelling like COVID super spreader event. Really? People are yelling shit? People are yelling shit. I don't know. One person I've had a chat.

We get on the shuttle. And they squeeze us all on. And now it's like really nuts. Like it's so hot. And and you can't move and it's like an hour on the tarmac and people are yelling six kids covid super spreader we got six kids and then someone faints because it's so hot in there oh my goodness and my sister's a doctor and she's like please can we move this shuttle we're having a medical emergency and there's like there's nothing we can do so anyways long story long we get off the plane we run to the gate all the way from like landing in international shuttling back to domestic sprinting back to international we get there the plane's

still there and they won't open the gate and we're there like there's 12 of us and so what ends up happening is it's formula one in montreal so there's no, like, Montreal airport is exploding. And so the woman's like, it's going to be fine. Just go get your bags. Go through customs. There's going to be somebody there to help you to Canada. And I was like, I've got six kids. It's the middle of the night.

Please tell me it's not going to be like a one-hour wait. She's like, no, no, no. So it's a five-hour wait. So I'm going for five hours. I start, like, begging. I'm literally begging this woman. She goes, you need to go to the back of the line. I was like, I've waited for five hours.

Like, please, please, please. Like I have six children. Is there, we, oh, there's no more flights to Europe for like a week. She said, and I was like, yeah, so she says, and I was like, but I have six kids here who have been, like, this is their first trip since COVID. So they've been counting down the sleeps for 70.

Counting down the sleeps. And for 70 of them. So please just get us on a plane. It's the middle of the night. We end up going home with no result. Go to a few hours sleep at a hotel. You mean to a hotel, not home. Yeah, to a hotel.

There's no hotels because it's Formula One. So finally we find this place that will take 12 of us. We sleep for a few hours. I go back. I line up again. Just begging, begging, begging. There's nothing we can do. Finally they get us 12 seats on a plane. I'm so stoked. We go to check in. They're like, great, 12 to Lyon,

right? And I'm like, to France? No, we're going to Portugal. So they booked us on a flight to France. And my sister's like, let's just go to France. We'll take a 24-hour train. It's fine. Let's just get to Europe. Let's just get somewhere in Europe. And so I was like, no, let's try, let's try, let's try. So anyways, this woman, Sophie, who's like an angel sent from the sky, she says, give me the passports. Give me the stack. Give me the stack of passports. And she basically goes, okay, I can get four of you to Rome right now. To Rome and then to Lisbon.

Who can go? And I'm like, I'll take my kids and my niece, Flora. Done. I love how you're like, I'll take my kids. Bye. Okay. To be fair, in the wrong order. First, they had my parents and my sister direct to Lisbon. We were like, I'll take my kids. Bye. Okay. To be fair, in the wrong order. First, they had my parents and my sister direct to Lisbon.

We were like, let's get my parents there direct. Then they were like, who can go to Rome? I take my kids and my niece. Then they're like, okay, two can go to Toronto, my little sister and my other niece. Then they're like, okay, we can get three more to Rome. So we have this amazing race-style journey where we're like, okay, Team Rome is definitely going to come in last. And then by this crazy, like, Team Toronto got second Toronto for seven hours. I was about to say, Team Toronto don't seem like they went that far.

Team Toronto got the short straw. So Team Toronto was supposed to have a pretty quick connection to Lisbon. They had a seven-hour delay. And it was just like we were texting each other the updates, and someone's like, oh, they're doing a wheel change. I'm like, i've never even heard of an airplane having like a wheel change like what is that i don't like the sound of wheel change right when you hear that it's like this plane might be cursed if it's got a wheel by that point if they were like they're rebuilding the aircraft i'd be like fantastic news please for the love of God, six children. So Sarah, did anyone at Air Canada ever contact you?

I mean, did you contact them? Did anyone ever say, oops? No. So they lost our luggage, all of it, obviously. Oh, my God. God knows where your luggage went. God knows. God knows.

Wait, did it ever end up coming to Portugal? So we just got half of it. And that's after me every morning being on the phone. I spend about an hour every morning on the phone. They're Canada, and it's faster if you click in French. So it's just like every morning, I'm like, So this is like how I start my morning. I love it when you speak French.

I don't know what you said, but it sounded fabulous. I love it when you speak French. It's wonderful. The family's getting so, like, making so much fun of me because this other side of me comes out when I talk to baggage. And then so half of it arrives. We end up, you know, getting there. And the best part was that my niece that was the most excited,

that literally, like, planned Portugal, picked Portugal as the destination. She's 12, and she was on Team Toronto and they were supposed to get there before us. And she excitedly runs off the plane, runs out of the airport. And then she sees that Team Rome got there first and her whole face just like dropped. She's like no longer excited to be in Portugal. She was just like, what is Team Rome doing here? How did they get in first? How did they win the race? So you still don't have all your luggage? We still don't have our luggage. Unfortunately, both my parents got COVID.

Oh, this is such a Sarah Chalk story, Donald. They're okay. Luckily, they had four vaccines, so they got sick, but they're okay. Donald, this story is called Sarah Chalk Goes on a Trip. Part eight. Audience, if it were back in the scrub days, she'd be saying it a little faster and more in her breath. And then, Team Romans, okay?

They make some real change. Did you hear what she said before that? She said she's a few drinks in. Oh, so maybe it calmed her down. She's not out of breath. It's evening it out. It's evening it out. It's evening it out. How is Portugal so far?

It's so beautiful. I've never been here. And it's just like magical. And the beaches are nuts. And the water is so gorgeous. The food is amazing. It's like the beginning obviously was not without a bit of stress. But Sarah, you have a family, and this to me is rare, that really all gets along with each other.

Yeah. A lot of families when they think about 12 of them going on a – are you living in the same house? We're sort of – we have enough space. We have enough space. It's great. Yeah. All right. There's a lot of families listening who go, a trip in the same house with 12 of

my family members. I think I'm going to stay home. With no luggage. Everybody's wearing bathing suits. With no luggage and two people have COVID. And the parents get COVID. No, we're having a good time. We just are in the middle of a dinner where I came to do this. I was in. All right. We'll let you go. No, no, no. I'm good time. We just, uh, I, you, we just are in the middle of a dinner where I was, uh, came to do this.

I was in. All right, we'll let you go. No, no, no, I'm not. No, I'm telling you. I won't tell you. I made it to the semifinals in the, um, uh, you're asking if we get along. This is how weird my family is at dinner tonight. I don't know how this started, but a chicken competition and of who does the best chicken.

Of what? Yeah. Of who could do the best chicken. Of what? Yeah. Of who could do the best chicken impression? I don't even know. I don't even know. I wish I was at dinner with you guys tonight. I know. Oh my God.

She's doing a full physical representation. How much have you had to drink over there in Portugal, Sarah? I guess the children have as well. I don't know. Oh, yeah. You guys, I miss you. It was so fun to see you in Austin. We miss you.

Thank you for taking a time to say hi all the way from Portugal. I'm sure the fans love to hear from you. I miss you so much. We were talking about you lovingly in this episode. As always. As we always do. Wait, I don't even know which episode you're watching, because this

was just a little... It's the one with Keri Russell. The first Keri Russell episode where she comes and then Keith proposes to you at the end of the episode. All right. It's very romantic. It's very romantic. It's very romantic. Zach got goosebumps.

I got goosebumps. It was very romantic. I guess I'm a romantic, Sarah. Even though it was Keith, my nemesis, I got goosebumps. We also saw the origin of the I Want You Back skis from JD, where we realize now, oh, he's about to sabotage everything that they got going on. You can see JD stewing with jealousy. Like the freak that he is.

All right, Sarah Chalk, we love you. That's our show. Let's just get out of here. That's our show, everybody. We're going to get the fuck out of here. We love you so much. You look beautiful, Sarah. Sarah, you never looked more beautiful.

That is not true because I don't have luggage, which means I don't have shampoo. Your hair is glowing. What is that? Mud. Looks great. Yeah. It actually does look really good. It looks good. Look at that. She just pulled it

down, audience. She's trying to make it look bad, but she can't. But she can't. She can't do it. Sarah's hammered, Donald. She's hammered. She's that. She just pulled it down, audience. She's trying to make it look bad, but she can't. But she can't. She can't do it. Sarah's hammered, Donald. She's hammered. She's gone. She's hammered. All right, we love you.

Have you guys ever had a cosmopolitan? All right, Sarah, why don't you count us out in French for the audience? Thank you, everybody. We'll see you next week. Here's Sarah Chalk in Enfrancée. Thanks, sis. We've got some stories about a show we made about a bunch of docs and nurses

in a Canada who love to hate. I said here's a story that we all should know. So gather round to hear our gather round to hear our Scrubs Rewatch Show with Zach and Donald I'm Raquel Willis. Join me on my new podcast, Queer Chronicles,

a show where LGBTQ plus folks tell their own stories in their own words. This season, teens will share all about growing up in political battleground states. We will always exist and we will definitely not let them take away our joy, no matter how hard they try. Listen to Queer Chronicles on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your most fabulous shows. Hi,

this is Shannon Doherty, host of the new podcast, Let's Be Clear is Shannon Doherty, host of the new podcast, Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty. So in this podcast, I'm going to be talking about marriage, divorce, my family, my career. I'm also going to be talking a lot about cancer, the ups and the downs,

everything that I've learned from it. It's going to be a wild ride. So listen to Let's Be Clear with Shannon Doherty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Hey, it's Alec Baldwin. This past season on my podcast, Here's the Thing, I spoke with more actors, musicians, policymakers, and so many other fascinating people,

like jazz bassist Christian McBride. Jazz is based on improvisation, but there's very much a form to it. You have a conversation based on that melody and those chord changes. So it's kind of like giving someone a topic and say, okay, talk about this. Listen to the new season of Here's the Thing

on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Michael shares the highs, the lows, and everything in between, offering a genuine glimpse into his world. The closest to getting what you want is always the hardest. People give up right before they get what they've always wanted to get. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.