Family Trips with the Meyers Brothers - The Lost Shmatta & A Booby-Trapped Veg-O-Matic: Holiday Listener Episode #19

Episode Date: December 23, 2025

We’re back with our monthly listener episode and you guessed it...it's holiday-themed! Seth and Josh dive into listener-submitted family trip stories, including a woman who never got her beloved shmatta back (and finally learns why decades later), a man’s desperate search for dentures accidentally thrown in the trash and his dutiful daughter’s mission to recover them, a mother whose love drove her across the country and back (with a Millennium Falcon in tow), and—last but not least—the legend of the Veg-O-Matic and one family’s elaborate plan to prevent Mom from owning one. Want to submit your own family trip story or send Seth and Josh a question for a future listener episode? Leave us a voicemail at speakpipe.com/familytripspod. Interested in contributing to the Grand Canyon Fundraiser? Visit tinyurl.com/familytripsfundraiser. Support our sponsors: ShiptShipt’s exclusive savings event: Season of Savings, happening now through December 28th. Shop tons of deals, including member-exclusive savings, all season long. Terms apply. Download the app or order now at https://Shipt.com Laundry SauceMake laundry day the best day of the week! Get 20% off your entire order @LaundrySauce with code TRIPS at https://laundrysauce.com/trips #laundrysaucepod TovalaFor a limited time, save up to $300 on the Tovala smart oven when you order meals 6+ times, by visiting https://laundrysauce.com/trips Tovala.com/trips and using code TRIPS. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Family chips with the Maya's brothers. Family chips with the Myers brothers. It's time for our holiday listener episode. It is the great gift that is bestowed upon us is stories from our listeners. I love it. I love the holidays. Yeah. I love the holidays, too.

Yeah. Have you probably already bought presents for mom and dad? At the time of this recording, no. Oh. Yeah. Kind of shocking. Do you have eyes on stuff? Not really.

I mean, I've got one, like, little thing for mom. Uh-huh. But, no, I got to. One of those airplane bottles of gin. She likes those. I know she does, yeah Which, yeah I mean, it's so fleeting

The joy that they bring her But I guess it's a cute bottle What if we got her Like just a little, a ton of those And one of those Like maybe a decommissioned Airplane Beverage Cart Mm-hmm

And then Dad would have to push it in We would say every hour dad has to push it around the living room I think you would also need to get her Like a first class seat I see Yeah You wouldn't be able to tell her

Like the seat you sit in Every day to watch TV Is better than a first class seat You would have to actually Maybe if you could bring it over the couch Or she's got her big chair I think her big chair I think her big chair's pretty first class

Yeah I mean again as a reminder First Class seats are like nice on a plane But like they're not good Like seats for your house Right It would look Untoward in your house

Lewis Black I'm gonna just tell you My favorite Louis Black Joe And there's many. Yeah. But Lewis Black, and again, this is, I think you'll approve it posh because it's a trip-related joke. Okay. Lewis Black once said, if you ever have a chance to fly to New Zealand, don't.

Because if you want to know what it's like to fly to New Zealand, sit in a chair and squeeze your head for 20 hours. And then he said, I don't want to hear people say, Oh, but you've got to do first class He goes, if you want to know what it's like in first class, sit in your nicest chair and squeeze your head for too many hours. Yeah, I mean, speaking of travel,

I hope everyone's holiday travel plans have gone smoothly and well. I feel like there's always, you know, in the world we live in where, let's be honest, the news always tells you things are a disaster. I feel like every holiday, there's never been a holiday season where I've turned on CNN

and there's a guy standing at the airport being like, it's going great. Yeah. I mean, if it bleeds, it leads, they say, in the news business. And they don't want to tell stories about people getting there just as they planned. We flew with eight kids and 12 pieces of luggage, and we got it all. Yeah, we got it all, and we were there for dinner. So I'm going to knock on wood until the end of time, but I will say,

so far, so good on certainly my holiday travel. Yeah. I mean, I got the big one coming up, but we'll see how we do. Yeah. We've got some holiday stories. Let's listen to one. Yeah, all right. Sam, why don't you cue us up? Hi, Josh and Seth.

This is Olivia from New York. First time caller, long time listener. So long time, in fact, I'm the one who came up with the tripsters moniker from that first YouTube chat. But here's my family holiday story. Two Christmases ago, my parents made the truck from California to New York to celebrate with my husband and my baby. They are respectively a septuagenarian and an octogenarian, so naturally not without a few health hindrances. My mom was slated for cataract surgery at the beginning of the new year, and my dad had just undergone emergency dental work with a brand new six-tooth upper bridge fresh off the press. And on Christmas morning, after presents and breakfast, I suddenly heard my dad scream my mom's name, just like Dave yells Alvin and Alvin and the Chipmunks.

It turns out that my mom had mistakenly thrown the cup holding his dentures away, thinking that they were dirty dishes, and which my neat-free husband had already taken out. Now, if we lived in the suburbs, this wouldn't be a problem, but we live on the 11th floor with 30-store building, and because of all the Christmas festivities, the trash chute was bloated from all the Christmas hams and gift wrap, and it was backed up all the way to the seventh floor. Now, with my dad facing eight more days of a vacation, and every dentist in the tri-state area apparently being closed, I, Ever the Dutiful daughter, marched to the trash room with our amazing-on-staffed Dorman. Armed with a ladder and a broomstick, we spent three hours shaking the trash chute, loosening the log jam, compacting, sorting, and praying. Eventually, I spotted our orange-handled Costco force-flex bag, and I clawed at it like a Central Park raccoon maniac, and performed what can only be described as horrific. flying field surgery. Wearing latex gloves, I sifted through apple cores, coffee grounds, the remains of a shrimp cocktail ring, excavating like the world's most disgusting archaeologist.

After three full passes, we discovered a tear in the bag where the dentures had escaped, and at this point, I can only assume they're somewhere out there clacking across someone's desk like a lined-up toy. I hope they're very happy. My dad eventually came down and said, I appreciate your valiant effort, but even if you found them, do you really think I was going to put them back in my life? So, lessons learned, do not let your vision-impaired mother help with housework and always tip your dormant well.

And Seth, you know this better than anyone because the only task more unpleasant than digging through a million garbage bags with me on Christmas morning is probably delivering a baby in the lobby. Happy holidays. Oh, my God. Yeah, a lot to unpack there. I wish she'd said, you know, and then my dad came down and said, I was missing 16.

Weirdly, I do, I think yours was worse. I think I'd rather have a baby. I mean, again, I didn't have the baby. Right. I think maybe Alexi would maybe say she'd rather, although, you know what, Alexi is a neat freak like your husband. I think she'd probably, if given the choice, have a baby in a lobby, then have to go through an apartment building.

worth of trash. Yeah. I mean, finding, being able to identify your bag of trash is really, I felt like that was, what a great find. Yeah. And like, oh, well, that makes it easier, but it doesn't and it didn't. Yeah. I mean, this is really making me think I got to get my own signature trash bag next time.

You know what I mean? Monogram. Should I get a monogram trash bag for the next time? Probably not. You know, Axel is now wearing kind of like Invisaline retainers And obviously I wore a retainer Yeah, which was a disaster era for me

Yeah And my relationships with Well, just with dad, I would say my relationship with dad Was strained in the way my mouth was When I put in my retainer once a month instead of every night But, you know, there was back of the day You lost a retainer and it was a full disaster There's a great scene in Parenthood, early in the movie Parenthood,

where Steve Martin is just like going through a chucky cheese garbage can looking for one. Because if you don't retain the shape of your mouth, then it all goes to hell again. Yeah, you go to the orthodontics and they say, you've been detained. If you can't retain it, they detain you. But Axel wears these ones that you wear, like, for a week at a time. They're like plastic and disposable enough. Right. Right. And so I, but I have like muscle memory to the panic of like when we leave a restaurant, someone's like, Axel, where? And do you know what we call them? Because it's much like we call my headgear gummy. We've just, the whole family from Addie on up to me just says, your teeth. We just call him his teeth. Like, Axel wear your teeth.

Yeah, that's a rough, that's a rough story. Your wife, Alexi, you know, age. ago when you guys were visiting New Hampshire, thought she had thrown her license into trash. Yes. And I was home and I tore open like three bags of trash in the garage, laid them out on the sort of cement garage, and just poured through everything and couldn't find it. And somehow you guys were able to get on a plane without an ID, I want to say.

Yeah, I can't figure out how we did it, but we did manage to get on a plane without an ID. Yeah. Oh, it's because she found it. No, I'm just kidding. And we never told you. We got in the car and we're like, what are we going to do? She's like, oh, here it is.

Yeah. I mean, it's not like, oh, it's better if it's your trash. If it's your trash, it's still trash. It's still stuff you. Yeah. Well, and in that case, it was dad trash. Oh, yeah. Dad trash.

I mean, it's really sweet, though. I like, when did you, can I tell you an embarrassing thing? Sure. Is it about the clothes that you're wearing today? I know. I'm so sorry. You're dressed up for the holidays. I came from the gym, everything went tight, and I realized, when I turned this on and saw you in your scarf and your colorful shirt, I'm like, son of a gun. Also, I'm just kind of blending into the back. It's just like a bad green look for me, and I'm so sorry. No, it's okay. It does look like. What's that movie, the wrestling movie with Fox Catcher.

Oh, yeah. You've got your real Foxcatcher look on right now. That's pretty good. I don't want. Thank you. Not great for the holidays, but... I feel like I was way too old before I understood what a septuagenarian and octogenarian meant. Oh, really? I knew it meant old person.

I didn't realize it meant like... I mean, again, when the puzzle piece went together, I'm like, oh, in their 70s, in their 80s. Yeah. But I just, I'm going to own that, like, I just thought it meant, like, old person. What do you think it is when you're in your 90s? Dead person. It must be a non-enginearian, right? Probably, yeah.

Nano. Nano. Yeah. Nano. That's why they say Nana. Nana came from that. Nano was originally what you call the 90-year-old woman, and then they were like, you know, most of them are grandmothers. Is that a good nickname?

Yeah. Again, I know we talk about a lot, you know, because the kids were just with the Punks, just the way they could. They've now, they went from them both. the Poncas to now it is hurry in punks. And the fact that, like, dad is punks to the kid is just perfect. Yeah. Yeah.

Perfect. It's a perfect nickname. Yeah? Yeah. Yeah, to those of you who think you can't get a new nickname. Later in life. Just stick with it. You sure can.

Never say die. Great story. Thank you so much. And thank you for your service. Thank you for the tripsters call out. Yeah, exactly. Well, we're talking about great nicknames. So let me just hand us tripsters.

Hey, we're going to take a quick break and hear from some of our sponsors. The support for family trips comes from Airbnb. I love staying and welcoming homes that I book on Airbnb, but got me thinking, Pasha, you know, maybe my home could do the same for someone else. Oh, yeah, absolutely. I mean, your home's lovely.

Some of the homes I've stayed in from Airbnb, just lovely. I mean, I wish they were my homes. But they can be my homes for a brief amount of time. Yeah. And if you want to stay in a home that has, you know, a bunch of Star Wars Legos, pay the extra buck, stay in my place. You know what I mean? Yeah.

That's the pitch. Yeah. You know what? Look, I've created a welcoming space for my family, and maybe you've done the same for yours. And while you're out on the road, taking a trip. Pasha, maybe you know, is it defray or affray the costs? I think it's defray. De fray.

It's a French word. It means of the fray. The point is, this extra income can support more than traveler life goals. It's just, you know, extra cash in your pocket for a place you already live in, then now others can enjoy. Your home could be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.com slash host. Support comes from Shipped.

Hey, Bashi. Hey, Sufi. Tell us about Shipped. Oh, well, Shipped makes the holiday season more joy for. by helping you save time with same-day delivery on everything you need, groceries, decor, gifts, and so much more from your favorite local and national stores like Albertsons, Michael's, Target, and PetSmart.

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to you? Check this out. Lowe's is going to give you two free select tools from DeWalt, craftsman, or cobalt when you buy a select battery or combo kit. Yep, two tools. Free. It's basically a holiday miracle. Plus, rewards members get free standard shipping all month long. Yet another reason not to leave your couch. Kick back, click around, and let the savings roll in. Shop new December deal drops on Lowe's.com every week this month. Fresh deals, cozy vibes, zero effort. All right, Sam, we got another story. Hi, Josh and Seth. My name is Andra. I now live in Providence, Rhode Island, but I grew up in the suburbs of Philadelphia. I didn't celebrate Christmas growing up, but I did live for Christmas vacation. Every Christmas vacation was spent visiting my snowbird grandparents in Florida. In December 1979, when I was about four and a half years old, our core four, mom, dad, big brother, and I, happily flew from Philadelphia to West Palm Beach, where two sets of grandparents eagerly awaited our arrival at the Palm Beach Airport. My mom presumably packed my clothes, and I had packed my carry-on bag, but the only thing that mattered inside of it was my most prized possession, a security

blanket, which was called my shmata. That's Yiddish for rag. Because my mom's parents lived in the summer in New York while my dad's parents lived near us in Philadelphia, we spent most of our vacation time with my mom's parents at their condo in a gated community called the Fountains. Most years, our aunt, uncle, and two cousins who lived in Houston would join us at the Fountains, and all of the grandkids would sleep at the grandparents' condo while the adults stayed in a nearby hotel. At the Fountains, the kids would ride bikes, do arts and crafts, go swimming, and so on. At night, after a full day of activities, I slept soundly with my Shmata by my side. One day, about halfway into our two-week visit, my family said to me,

Four and a half is a little old for a security blanket. My mom said she would mail the Shmata home just to see if I could survive the rest of the vacation without it. Maybe this would be the first step towards getting rid of it for good. I did not like the plan, but presumably I thought it sounded reasonable. After all, in the end, I would get my blanket back. At the end of vacation, I was actually eager to leave Florida so that I could be reunited with my schmata. After we pulled into the driveway at home and unloaded the luggage from the car, my dad collected two weeks' worth of mail. Now, I was expecting a very important package, but I only saw mail in the shapes of envelopes.

Where's my shmata? I immediately asked. Mom and dad were quiet for a moment, figuring out how to say what needed to be said. So my older brother enthusiastically exclaimed, We threw your shmata in the dumpster at the fountains. My heart literally broke. The shock silenced me, and I went upstairs to my room to cry. I still feel crushed as I recount the story. Very recently, my brother and my brother and

I, who are now in our 50s, left our families in New York and Rhode Island respectively to visit our parents in Florida after my dad had knee replacement surgery. I'd like to note that my grandparents have passed away, but my mom and dad still live at the fountains, though in a different house. I told them, I'd planned to call this story into your podcast, and my mom started laughing. She explained that she had been hiding the shmata in her suitcase the entire time. They never threw it in the dumpster. But because I had cried in silence and did not make a big scene,

that she did not feel obligated to return the blanket to me. Thanks, guys. I love the pot. Let me tell you, Josh's face through this, I swear to God, if he could march down to the fountains right now. I mean, I would... He would have words. I would be in the dumpster.

I would have words. Wouldn't it be crazy if you went in the dumpster and you found the teeth from the first story? Oh my God, yeah. And they were just like holding on to the schmanta. The schmanta was in the mouth of the first story. Oh, my God. Gosh, I don't even know. Pashi was not happy with this story.

He did not care for it at all. I mean, I care for the story because I care for Andra. Yes, of course. He did not care for the behavior of anybody is safe. for the storyteller. Yeah. Also, because you cried silently, they were like,

I guess we won't give it to her. So did it, like at that point, I would think, you know, her mother should put it away as a keepsake, obviously something that was very important to her daughter. And then I was hoping

that it was going to be, I kept it, and I still have it, and here it is. And I'll give it to you as a, you know, 50-year-old. And wouldn't that be

the magic of the holidays come to life. But no, just like we took it from you and then because you didn't make too big of a stink, we were like, yeah, I guess that's it. Yeah. It also, I don't know, it feels like it's incentivizing loud crying. Yeah.

You know what I mean? Which I got no love for. No, no love at all. The brother, certainly, also a full villain in this story. Yeah. I mean, real Scott Farkas. Yeah, he really wanted to get the sadness out. He wanted to just blast you with the sad.

Yeah. And that her parents would just be like, oh, yeah, her brother said it was in the dumpster. So we'll go with that too. Yeah, they like, what's our plan when we get home? Like, let's see what our son does. Follow his lead. And if it's something good, we'll just go with that. Ooh, dumpster.

Remember he said dumpster and she got real quiet? And then we just wiped our hands like, all right. I'm done with the schmub. Yeah. Yeah. I imagine, you know, the, I feel like the complaint that a lot of parents have for these, you know, teddy bears that are around for years and things like, you know, blankets is that they get pretty gross after a while and they're like so beat up. But kids just don't care. Like, they just want them.

Yeah. And so I understand the impulse to be like, all right, we got to, this thing's seen its day. But if it's that important to a kid, I don't know. You were saying, like, we schmata come up with a better plan. I, so we, it's funny, because again, Alexi's so on top of it, like, all our kids have a different thing. Yeah. And Axel has these Like little white dogs

Where they're like a dog's head And then like a rat Like the dog's body is like basically a shmada And we've got like six of them Because we're so worried about losing one But like then Axel knows they're six So he's like he's got to sleep with three now Yeah

Addie you know what Addy calls her little thing Dubba Dubbub Dubb yeah I was I slept in her bed Last time I was there And there was a double dub-a-dub on the bed and I took a picture and sent it to her and then she video called me to tell me that I was holding it wrong and there were some very specific things that I needed to do but she was happy that I was with the dub-a-dub she was not there when Josh was sleeping in her bed and she really wants she's very upset that she's the only person in our family who sleeps alone and she wants a three-tiered bunk bed and And this morning, she got in bed and was talking to me about how much she wanted that because she, like, now she's waking up early and just, like, walking into her room because she's lonely.

And I'm like, do you really want to sleep with Ashen Axel? They wait. She's like, yeah. Or I want to sleep with Mama. And she has the littlest bed, as you know. Yeah. And Alexei was like, I can't, we can't be in the same bed. And she was, I will get on top of you.

So, that wouldn't be all bad. I mean, in small doses, having an addy blanket's a pretty good way to go. Yeah, it's a weighted blanket that's not too heavy, just a little. So again, if you are, if there's any message to take from that story, if you're sort of a dark-hearted soul, the fountains is a good place to spend your remaining years. I also like, by the way, that the grandparents are, their hands aren't clean either. Like, she's too old for a shemada. Send it home.

Yeah. Also, I know this is, it countered everything I've said so far. You were too old for a shmada, and it was time for somebody to do something. It's four and a half. All right. Well, sorry that that worked out the way it did. Yeah. But at least you found some resolution and knowing that it hadn't been thrown in the dumpster

and that you just didn't cry loud enough. Yeah. I don't know. It's a tough one to walk away from being like, well, I learned a lesson. I really don't know what you learned there. I still want to know. I don't know what the actual end of the Schmada was. Like, did they just throw it away once she thought it had been thrown away? Yeah, maybe that was it where they were like, hey, I think we got out of this thing. Yeah. Let's get out when it's getting's good. Hey, we're going to take a quick break and hear from some of our sponsors.

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No, you take breaks. I watch you take naps. No, man. You go nonstop? I go nonstop. Even when I'm napping. Guess what then? What?

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Yeah. Yeah, let's see. Sam? Hi, Seth and Josh. My name is Daryl. and this story takes place at Christmas time in 2020. My 20-year-old daughter, Maria, was in school in Washington, D.C. while I was living in Austin. Like every college student during the pandemic, she was having a rough year.

Online classes, weird living arrangements, zero social life. She was coming to Austin for winter break, but she didn't want to fly. So I did what any slightly unhinged but loving mom would do. I drove 25 hours to D.C. to pick her up. I was determined to make this trip fun, even though most of America was basically closed for business. We packed her stuff, including her cat Posey and his litter box, and a 7,500-piece Lego Millennium Falcon. Because why not? And we hit the road. On our second night, we stayed at the famous Peabody Hotel. I'm not especially proud of this next part, but moms everywhere will

understand. While Maria waited by the elevator, I checked in. She, pretending to be invisible, me pretending that the cat carrier disguised as a suitcase didn't meow. We successfully smuggled Posey in, caught the parade of ducks, and felt like rebels. I wanted to show Maria Beale Street, but when I say it was shut down, I mean zombie apocalypse shut down. The only thing open in Memphis was the giant bass pro shop inside a giant pyramid. We were so thrilled something was open that we spent hours wandering around it, pretending to be outdoorsy people. Then, hallelujah, Graceland was open. I'm not a huge Elvis fan, and Maria barely knew who he was, but that visit changed everything. Graceland rocked. My daughter came out a full-blown Elvis convert. The only

other major thing we found open was the JFK Museum in Dallas. And wow, it was fascinating and beautifully done. We had an amazing visit, and yes, we actually finished the Millennium Falcon. At the end of a break, I finally put my foot down and made Maria and Posey fly home because once was enough for that drive. The only problem, you can't take a massive Lego spaceship on a plane. So now I'm the proud owner of a huge, awkward, dust-collecting millennian falcom, a permanent reminder of our great pandemic road trip. I mean, that is a good mom. That's a great mom. I mean, I wish when Shmada hears this story, she's going to be like she never would have

thrown it away. Sorry, I'm doing such a bad job remembering people names today. It was her name. Her first name was Shemada, though, right? No. Andra It was Andra Andra Yeah Andra's like

Oh my God This way You know Because by the way Let me tell you this Four and a half May or may not Be too old

For a shmata Mm-hmm 20 years old It's too fucking old For a millennium Falcon Lego And to even have it be like Oh well how am I

going to fly this Back home How do you run into The sort of roadblock Of like Oh but this We might have to drive Imagine

driving 25 hours to pick somebody up and they're like, I'm going to bring my leg up. That's what a great mom. And I will say that is, I bet that. That's how I will, if I ever go to Graceland,

I hope it's like that where I can't, there's nowhere else to go and I go there and I have this like incredible eye-opening experience because it is not on my list of places to go.

Yeah. I mean, I've said on this show, I've been and I really enjoyed it. I've also been to that Peabody Hotel. I have too. Yeah. Have you seen the parade of ducks? I have, man. You don't go to the Peabody Hotel and skip the ducks. Well, I don't know. You're like, oh, you know what? I might be the guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I might be the guy who skips the ducks. I take it all back. It was a fair question. And yeah, I mean, that's just making it work with what you've got. And it speaks to sort of, it speaks to some of the best,

things about the holidays is that people who are willing to go to great lengths to be together. And, yeah, I really applaud Daryl. I do want to, for the people who don't know about the Peabody Hotel in Memphis, what is it? Like noon, like a guy comes out, all dressed to the nines. Yeah, he's all dressed up. And then the ducks come out of an elevator, I think. And then they go to a fountain. Yeah, in the middle of the lobby.

They come in and then they hang there for a good while. And then I think there's a procession and there's a recession of the ducks and I don't know, maybe it's at 12 and 4 or something like that. But it's everyone is so charmed by seeing ducks get off an elevator and just they know exactly where they want to go. That's a perfect word for it. If you said what is the experience, it is charming. You were just low-key charmed. Yeah. I would say the minute it was over, I knew it would be the last time I'd watch the ducks.

You're proving my point. Look, I take it back. If I was with my kids, of course, I'd be like, let's go see the procession of ducks. But, I mean, I think I was in Memphis doing stand-up. And so it wasn't like I was like, I'll extend my trip a day to see the ducks-exend your trip a day. But if it's like, that's what you're saying. If you're up in the room and it's 1145 and you're like, like, well, I'd rather read five more pages of my book

than go downstairs and get a good spot to see the ducks. I think the fun thing to do is go down and when the ducks come out, scream really loud, there was one more yesterday, especially if kids are there. Or I think it would be maybe if you bought a duck costume and you just came down at noon every day and walked out. Oh, and watered out and got in the pond. Yeah, and everyone would be very confused because they would know 100% you weren't a duck.

Yeah. Yeah. And then at the restaurant, again, only if kids are within your shed, I think you can ask the waiter. Is the duck good? Is it like a seafood restaurant where that's like the lobster tank? You just go down and you're like, yes, yes, yes. The one with the green head, please. Yes, yes, the plump one with the green head.

there's the bass pro shop someone someone once posted this thing there's like there are big signs and i feel like it was a bass pro shop is what this story's from and uh there are signs that say like what department it is and one of the signs said fashion and someone on like instagram had just taken a camera and set it up there and then put on all these different what could be called like fashion outfits and did like a catwalk thing coming out of the fashion thing and it was cut together so well really really made me laugh yeah that's great whoever did that applause bravo um and applause to darrell for making that trip to unbelievable yeah unbelievable um just love it um I think we have another story uh yeah let's hear it true story Sam we got one more I'll take one more

I like you're asking like do you have a true story actually Do we have a liar? Did a liar send in a story? It better be good. Oh, it better be good if you're going to lie about it. Hi, Seth. Hi, Josh. This is Marnie. I'm calling from San Antonio, Texas.

We moved here in 1963 from Iowa. And this is a Christmas vacation family reunion and trip. We stayed with my aunt in a large rural, farmhouse outside of Wall Lake, Iowa, which is the birthplace of Andy Williams. But the story begins in about 1950. A door-to-door salesman came to see my mom, and he had a handy veggie chopper. My mom scheduled an appointment that night for a fancy official demonstration. but when my dad got home he said that's not going to work and she canceled the appointment for the demonstration but sort of sat on it for 20 years I love everything that's going on right now.

When the Christmas trip came up two decades later, the Vegematic was introduced and widely marketed, I believe that was a Ron Popiel product. Christmas Eve she received the Vegematic from my dad That night, my uncles and brothers stayed up late Trying to booby trap with plastic wrap or any device But they were unable to sabotage the Vegematic So Christmas day after breakfast, the aunts, uncles, cousins All crowded into the kitchen for the long-awaited demonstration.

My mom used a tomato, and somehow it exploded and sprayed tomato seeds, juice, pulp on everyone. Hours later, it still dripped from the ceiling. My mom was a real good sport about it, and subsequent veggies, including tomatoes, were successfully chopped. It was a great trip, and the last time that we were really all together in that big family. Happy holidays, to the Myers and to all the listeners.

Really enjoy the show. Thank you. Oh, Marnie. Marnie, that is the most... I couldn't stop laughing thinking about dad listening to the story. To what end were they trying to booby-trap it? No. It seemed like they effectively did if the tomato went everywhere.

So this is Marnie's mom? I think so. In the 50s? Yeah. So in the 50s, her husband's like, no way, Jose. Yeah. And then 20 years later. 20 years later, he buys it for her for the purposes of booby tramp.

And then tomatoing his own home. That's comeuppance. That's comeuppance. I also just the tag at the end of like, that was the last time we were all together. I mean, it's great to have a great memory to sort of tie it together. And I will say Marnie's family, I bet that's probably, I don't think they look back on that and are thinking like, man, if we knew it was the last time, we shouldn't have rigged up that veggie chapper to spray tomato all over, Mom. I mean, it sounds like, I think it's a real rock and roll. Like, we played it just right.

Yeah, it is, it's fireworks. It's fireworks in your own home, but it's just one, one big old tomato explosion. Also, just on delivery, Marnie, I just couldn't get enough of how insane that story was and how normal Marnie was telling it. Yeah, I appreciate it. At some point, I felt like we were two cops just sort of nodding along, like trying to be respectful while wondering why we got a phone call. You know, where I was like, but what, and that's, yeah, man, we understand what was the crime?

Ron Popil. Ron Poppeel was a real fun blast from the past. Yeah. I think RIP Ron Poppeel. I think he passed away. Yeah. All those letters are in it. I mean, definitely R for the Ron.

And then IP are both in Poppeel. Oh, you weren't spelling it? That's... That was great, Marnie. That's the hardest I've laughed at a story. Yeah. I couldn't get enough of that. Yeah.

I feel like every event at Marnie's house was like fully crazy. And nobody raised their voice at all. I mean, the notion of like her dad and all the uncles just getting together for some to cause some hijinks. They just seem like a group you'd want to hang with. Yeah. Yeah. When Marnie's husband and his brothers are around, look out. You want to party with those dudes.

Yeah. Well, this has been great. It was just a delight, man. Yeah. Happy holidays, everyone. Also, you all have such lovely families, obviously, excluding Andra. It is the only good person and a, you know, conclave of demons. But it is just so lovely to hear stories about families.

families who enjoy each other in the holidays. And yeah, thanks everybody. Yeah, I hope you guys have just wonderful holidays. And if anything goes wrong, hold on to those stories. Call them in for next year. And shoot over to YouTube real quick and tell me, does my sweatshirt qualify as a shmada? I think it might.

Yeah, and the true Yiddish meaning of the word, it does. It's a rag. Posh, definitely. If Posh had his druthers, he would definitely throw this in the garbage and tell me he'd mailed it to me. That's the only way to get rid of it. Thanks, everybody.

Thanks, everybody. Happy holidays. Bye. It's a listener. It's a listener. Listener episode. Listener episode. Listener episode with stories of holidays.

gone wrong. Listener episode. Listener episode. Olivia's a New Yorker. Her parents came on the holiday. Dad's dentures got thrown away. Trash stacked up seven floors to boot. They disappeared inside the old trash chute.

They disappeared inside the old trash chute. During COVID season, In a bid to avoid the disease, Daryl drove all the way to D.C. Got her daughter and her cat posy and started driving back down south. And started driving back down south. Well, don't forget the Lego set that her daughter just had to pack. Everything was great, but at the end of the break, Daryl said, you're flying back and we talk about Andrew.

Let's talk about Andrew. Went on down to Florida. Parents said, let me see a shmada. We'll hold on to it for you. And they said they put it in the mail. And they said they put it in the mail. Her brother blurted it out. We threw it out.

When they got home, man, that is rough. And if you wonder why Because when she cried She didn't cry loud And mouse Marnie had a real winner Had a real winner Truly a family classic Her mother received a vegematic

Dad and uncles tried to booby trap it And a tomato exploded Pump all over everyone To our listeners Dearest listeners, thank you so much for listening, and happy holidays to you. Dearest listeners, happy holidays, dearest listeners, happy holidays, dearest listeners, happy holidays. Thank you.