Fat Chance Podcast - Ep.1 - Elliot, Hartwell, Reimer, Weintraut

Episode Date: January 6, 2021

Part 2 of the two part Tending a Lisp/Fat Chance Finale/Intro. The Conversation continues to roll from the last episode. However, we add Ms. Sami Reimer into the mix. All stemming from Wisconsin-Madison, we once again touch upon our time at the Double U, college pranks, relationship "deal breakers" and finally round it out with our first loves. 

uh i know yeah um should we start we already are okay happy that i'm glad that was the first thing no this is probably the first and only episode okay i can't say that i'm done promising things for this show but uh hopefully this is the only episode on the new one that doesn't have video, which is a crying shame that this group does not have video on them right now. I'm glad that it's happening right now. They look like a crazy person. I don't know. I feel like this is going to be the most animated group I'll have for the first couple. Introduce yourselves.

We should introduce all ourselves because we didn't in the first one or the finale so we have chuck chuck chuck chuck and chuck's girlfriend here with us today and uh chuck's girlfriend oh come on give us the this is part two of the finale but part one of the other show and on the finale your significant other told us the three things he hates about you we're giving you the opportunity to retaliate no no you specifically said these are deal breakers if she continues to do them and and and sammy we don't know who asked the question it's not important who asked the question now i'm pretty curious as to who did that well you also know who asked the question here's the real thing is he didn't hold any

punches and uh i mean there's no there's no time like the present. There's no platform like right now. You have 122 million American citizens listening to your voice. I feel like almost we could use this as a therapy session and just go through some of the issues that Adam and I have deep down. One of them I would love to start with. Adam, I thought you were Chuck. Let's actually recap what he said about you. That's fair. He did say, um, no tits, flat ass.

All false. All false. One, one thing about my girl, her body's banging. That ain't an issue. Chain smokes. Cigars. Cigars. Huge cigar girl.

And fat lippers. Yep. I hate that. That's all right. Long cut and fat lippers yep i hate that that's long cut fat lippers i had to swallow them i don't spit them okay so let's hear it adam i'll address you you do this thing so adam and i here we go. We tend. He knows, I think, about it. And I wonder if it's what he was thinking earlier. It's the legit answers. Yeah, this is. Also, just to run it back to the real answers that Adam gave was that I fart, which is completely

fucking false. Like, women don't fart. And I don't think that's a fair statement. How could she fart? It's a flat answer. It's nothing back there. No. Women don't fart.

Period. I can't remember the other one. What was it? That I don't smoke cigars, which is also false. No, no, I wish that you would take more chews is what it was. Yeah. Dirt kink. Yeah, and then in your country music, fan.

Also not fair. But, so Adam and I have a long distance relationship. And with that, you tend to make love through the camera. Oh. Yeah. I get the microphone because I'm not letting you retaliate on any of these yet. So when we are doing so, Adam tends to send videos of himself pleasuring himself and making love to himself. He does it in the shower very often.

I thought you said you just need that time to get clean. He spends a lot of time in that shower too, but he does this weird thing with the video. Five minutes of cleaning, an hour and five of cleaning out. So when I'm watching it, like I'm. You can tell her to cut it off at any point. I know what she's about to say. It's good. He, I'm also watching the videos and doing the same to myself while watching them.

And he does this frog leg thing that he masturbates with his feet together and spread i can't even describe it how would you guys describe this he's like spread eagle but like touching toes and then going like this where's the camera yeah it's angled like i would say like this is so i see is he is he holding the camera or is he like is it the bottom oh is it like i have almost seen seen are his feet holding the camera at the end because i'd actually i would have to commend you that would be impressive no it's not it's not a feet angle it's it's i like to describe it as if you're looking through my eyes at my dick kind of a thing. Yeah, it's just bizarre. Because sometimes, too, when we're making love in person, he does it, too.

And it's not like a... He goes full Ninja Turtle on you? Okay, well, let's all talk about it. But I'm actually starting to lean a little bit into adam's side not about the filming it and making frog noises while you do it but um there are no fucking frog noises let's clarify well okay occasionally a ribbon occasionally ribbit ribbit motherfucker but no one's gonna mean the facts i don't know i'm kind of starting to gravitate towards adam's side here but continue we need to hear the way, complaint number two and three.

Yeah, that's true. These ones are quick ones. Charlie, I think, can agree with the second one. I'll do a quick agree-disagree after each one, and then you elaborate. No, you'll definitely agree on this one. Adam's really, really pokey. Like, you give him a task. Agree.

Yeah, you are slow and it takes him forever to do it and you just are sitting there waiting right like really ready to go and he's doing like a million other things and you're just like what what are you doing and why is it taking so so long to do that charlie has created a statement that i've joined on and i just learned in the last episode what statement oh zzz i was gonna say usually so again i actually i've kind of changed my viewpoint on that i agree that he's pokey but i i don't i don't it doesn't bug me i think there's a beauty to the madness like if we but if we were all sitting here with a to-do list but now you know what he's doing at least when he's showering so like yeah but his weird frog sex shit i'm gonna leave that out of this we're moving on is that something you don't like is what you're saying the frog sex or the pokiness both yeah they definitely are things i

don't like so but if we all had a to-do list in front of us that had three things and they were all basic and could be done in this apartment like fucking i guess sweep the floors do the dishes like make your bed adam's our attack or i'd imagine your attack might be you do one thing you finish one thing you move to the next thing you finish that thing adam starts actually this goes into my number one complaint about adam adam starts all the things and here is his most grievous offense against me i've lived with him for 18 months now is he will heat a coffee in the morning and he and i work out in the main area he works in his room he can hear the fucking end of microwave alarm going off but because he waits so long and allows me to be peppered by these bings from the

fucking microwave so i will generally go and stop the binging open it and then he'll come back out find that his coffee is cold because he's left it there for so fucking long and then he has to heat it back up again i get another round of binging my My, I guess, I'm not about to lose my fucking mind, but, like, every time this happens, I get one step closer. But, yeah, he's pokey. Yeah. All right. I will say the coffee.

Just give me. Ooh, hold on there. There's no defense for the coffee thing. There's no defense. I say we move on. No defense for the coffee thing. I would like to move on. The coffee thing is valid every

time i come out there and i see that the microwave door is open it hurts it hurts it feels really bad and i look at charlie and he's got this look of disdain in his eyes he looks at me and i know he wants to kill me and i go my bad which makes me feel so much better. All right. Sorry. I need to ask you. Okay. My last statement here is what I'm thinking, but I want to know you very, let's make it quick too on what you thought I was going to say. Sure.

But my last one is that Adam has this thing that he acts like he's really busy at work, but then does, decides just not to work all day long. He like gets up in the morning. He's like, I am so stressed. I have so much to do today. I'm going to go sit in the shower for two hours, get up, meditate. Frog pose for half that time. Go in the kitchen, get coffee, come back in, decide to meditate again.

He didn't get that coffee. And then never get to work. Does anyone have an issue reaching him him ever or con is it just me i i live with them and i don't think he's responded to a text i've sent i will call text like when he responded to me during your birthday party he's like hey sorry i'm on the aux i couldn't get to him like i feel like that's the number one time you're gonna hear your phone ring is when the party music stops. He was lying. Yeah, sorry.

No shit. He is more so than a thing of being a little flighty. He has a bigger problem. It's just a fucking terrible compulsive liar. Not for his own gain. Not even necessarily just to screw with someone. There's something in him where he cannot speak truth. Would you care to find that

he will lie i won't even address that because to address that would address it as a real issue and not another syllable on that and i won't waste another syllable on that no the the thing that i thought sammy was gonna, which is honestly my biggest insecurity as far as dating her, is that I have a terrible... That I'm ten times hotter than you? Well, that's an issue. Yeah, I mean, that's an issue,

but it's kind of like, for me, it's like, oh, you know, I swung for the fences and I hit a home run kind of a thing. My real issue... And she bunted. Dude, you guys aren't even playing the same sport. You kicked a field goal on a baseball

diamond. Here's my real issue. Whatever. Sammy's way hotter than me. We can all agree on that. I think everyone is agreeing on that. We're not going to get into it. The thing is, on top of that, every time that she sleeps with me and

has sex with me, she wakes up in the morning to me covered in a pool of my own sweat. And I'm not talking like your typical like, oh, he went and worked out sweat. I'm talking like vinegary, like disgusting night sweats. I sweat every night. And she has to wake up to that. And anytime she reaches over and is like hey maybe i want to cuddle adam in the middle of the night sweaty back that's what she runs into oh hey am i gonna get away from that do i roll over into adam's side no it is covered in

sweat it's about a six out of seven chance that that's gonna happen so i'm surprised that's not in your top three that feels good the hearing that yeah that's a lot would you put that in your top five i don't think that's the most annoying thing you do it's one of those things that you because it's not it's not of his own volition all these other all these other terrible things he does to us those those are things that he intentionally does whether or not he sweats whether or not he drinks a bunch of pre-workout five minutes before he goes to bed those are things that he intentionally does. Whether or not he sweats, whether or not he drinks a bunch of pre-workout five minutes before he goes to bed, those are things that we don't know what that does. And it's completely unintentional.

But there are things like the coffee where it's seemingly unintentional, but he says he sees the disdain. There is disdain. This hasn't changed at all. It feels a little intentional at times. It feels a little bit intentional. You know, it's not intentional. I will describe that.

I mean, it hurts to see you hurt. Then what the fuck are you doing? What are you doing to me if it's not intentional? Fair. Is that, like, enormously loud what i just did we left i think like harwell and i've been watching the the audio waves a lot and every once in a while this one is by the by the way this one is extremely um louder than the uh last one last one yeah as in like we're all talking louder is it we're a little more excited and I'm, I'm all for it.

This is episode one. Yeah. This is, this is good. This is, we're starting with a bang. You might not want to leave. I'm not. You're in. You were, you were kind of against it.

You're right. I was. I mean, I've heard all your voices for the past four days. And although I've enjoyed it a lot of times. You did not enjoy it on the car ride home. You were telling Adam. You're like hey I've had enough of you. Shut the fuck up.

Which at that point I was like. I'm going to go to sleep. Because she's definitely annoyed with my voice then. Well. Do you think it's a voice basis. Or something else. Because I have thoughts. On a few voices in the room charlie i never get

sick of you thank you oh that's interesting and interesting to hear from my own girlfriend if i go too long without hearing sammy's voice which is like audio chocolate it hits the ear it's sweet it's and it's indulgent and i and i couldn't have enough of it. And if I do, I get a tummy ache. But, you know, I'm happy I had the chocolate. And then you move to some of the other hosts. You're not talking about me right now, right? No, it's just some people. It's the first episode of the new podcast.

And thank you to all the listeners tuning in to hear Charles Elliott. It means a lot. But also, I mean, some people go a little flat a little monotone and it's i don't know i mean do you have any thoughts on that adam mike chuck sammy mary i don't know what you're talking about i don't know i'm i'm the host and i'm sharing a fucking microphone right now with king monotone over here i also love that I have my own, and so do you. Yeah, that's nice. Doesn't it feel kind of powerful?

I do feel kind of, like, Rogan-y over here with, like, this is, like, some machinery. Get the stand, yeah. Sammy, you do need to make sure you're, like, in the microphone and not leaning over trying to touch Adam again. No, I was trying to not be obnoxious, like, when Adam grabs it and puts it, like, right here

and, like, laughs into it. See, that's his exact, like, opposite opposite problem he was talking into his martini glass away from the microphone okay that's neither here nor there i want to talk about the spark that was me and charlie before adam and i even arrived go on. Do you remember when we locked eyes across the room with the W? Yeah. By the way, where dreams are made of. Yeah.

It was where we found love. I actually remember exactly what had happened there. I had been told to change a keg in the keg room. And I was like, you got it, boss. You guys are a good employee employee and uh when you're working in a full neck brace after breaking your neck this this was in the period of my employment where i was uh i did have to wear a neck brace um i uh ended i had broken my neck and it was would you mind taking a quick dive into why you broke your neck? Dive is an interesting word. I'll sum it up as fast as I can.

I was in South Padre. There was a mislabeled pool that said it was deep. Mislabeled. It said, do not dive. It was labeled as not even a foot distance. It was labeled as deep. Don't dive. And so I trusted it.

Don't dive unless you know you can do it. Yeah. And so I tried to hit a jackknife. And actually, the execution of a jackknife and and then i and and and it actually the execution of said jackknife was excellent it was and where i realized that i wouldn't be met with applause was when my head bounced a couple inches off of the the concrete flooring of the pool um i didn't quite then know that my neck was broken. But I knew that something didn't feel quite right. And so I dragged myself out of the pool.

I'm next found in a bathroom lying prone with my irises. Or what's the black part? Iris? Iris. No, my pupil. My pupil. Like huge. And there's two cops talking to me like, what drugs are you on?

Because my eyes are fucked. And then I'm also underage. Yeah. And so, anyway, talked my way out of that one. You did not talk your way out of that one. You sat there absolutely zombified, and John Fick came in and saved you. There's some questions to how it all happened, but I, yeah. Do you have any recollection of how it all happened? Well, I had a traumatic head injury.

So, yes. But, no, and then, I don't know. So, broke my neck, was in a neck brace, and so I'm in there changing a keg, and I don't know how to do this because we got no training. Because I was in a neck brace they're pretty much just like well we'll need you to stock bottles kick people out who are fighting lift the heaviest things in the bar just go ahead and lift a bunch of bullshit like ice and then he looks at me again after this and goes well actually you just sit near the

bathroom and make sure people don't do coke um and so that was that was the extent of my training and so i'm told to change a keg i've never done in my life and i don't know like me and this new girl i had met were kind of texting a little bit she said she'd show up to work surprised me you know so i'm in there i change a keg i fuck it i botch it in every which way i'm literally soaked my entire shirt soaked but you can kind of it's not white but it's gray you can see the outline of my pecs bleeding through. And it's like, I don't know. I feel like pecs is an aggressive. No, he looks good.

He looks good. Yeah. And yeah, so anyway. Go out there soaked. I tell another bar back to handle it because I have business to take care of. And that's cocaine. And I was on my way to the bathroom not to do cocaine which I gave her a gold star for

one of my few duties locked eyes and got a tingle down there that was the spark yeah and like many many sparks they don't contribute to a full blown fire as they have with you and your new boyfriend

is it a top five regret yeah sure is it a top three regret yeah is it number one well yeah but you know i wouldn't change anything because i think you're both happy so okay that's sweet you know fun fact the thing in the bathroom you know i would say probably a year and a half later when i was working there we were told to like stop kicking people up by the owner because you know what they're just having fun and they're not causing a problem that was i we had a staff meeting like maybe a week or two after the incident that chuck is talking about in which he got assigned no coke duty and i asked at the meeting in front of all the staff, the owners right there, I'm like, so I still kind of see people doing coke in the bathrooms.

Like, I know this is against policy for them to be doing that. Like, and he kind of cuts me off. He's like, well, we've had a little shift. I think like coke drives business a little bit. Like, I think you just let them let them do it as long as they're not causing problems. And the Coke heads were the ones that were causing every single big problem in there. We had a Coke head on one of our first two weeks of working. In the Jersey?

Not the Jersey guy. I guess I only assume it's a Coke head because it was kind of an extreme thing that happened, which is somebody commandeers one of the enormous serving trays that you would bring out like eight meals on if like a bunch of people ordered shit so like not a drink holding thing like food they take it from the kitchen they run upstairs and huck it like a fucking frisbee into the line of people outside and directly like chop someone in the neck and like so as someone who's had neck trauma it was charlie in his brace it was me working the door in my neck luckily i had

protection but um no and then like i mean yeah that that we could probably go a long we could go for it's like i'm not opposed because i have yet to do i always thought when i started the other shows like there's just gonna be one episode titled the w yeah like i've gone on kk i've gone on rant i promise you and wandos i promise you what's happened at the w in our time it might be 10 times worse than the last wandos and the kk definitely the kk i wouldn't i would give you that. The KK was way more strict, but I don't know if Wando's will compete with the W. Did or did your boss not get fired

for doing and selling cocaine? Yeah. In the back room. Yeah. That's when it gets really tricky at the W. You have a distribution person in your ranks, too. The W honestly might have been the best life

lessons I've ever learned rather than anything I learned in class and college. How to deal with people of all sorts of mental capabilities. Because whether it's your customers, your employees or your bosses, you learn some lessons.

And how not to get screwed over who do you think got screwed or in your time got screwed the most ben ramirez i promise ben ramirez i don't know as in like he got fucked by like their policy or something he poured i think one free shot at the kk and i think that my boss at the time wanted him gone not sure why i'm not gonna feed into that drama. But I think he saw him pour one free shot, and he instantly got fired. Wow. Well, it's because Ben is sexier than him.

It could be that. Like, on the spot, you're gone mid-shift. It doesn't help being a guy in that industry. I can't remember that exactly, but it was something along those lines. I just remember hearing it being like, I cannot. Absolutely ridiculous. One quick thing. Go for it. Because Chuck was talking about moving kegs in his neck brace. I just remember hearing it being like, I cannot. Absolutely ridiculous. Yeah. One quick thing.

Go for it. Because Chuck was talking about moving kegs in his neck brace. My first day at the W, our manager, who you know who that is. Yeah. I don't want to throw his name, but he was like, yeah, so you're coming in after Charlie, who's in the neck brace. And I'm like, I know. He's my friend. And he's like, well, there's this, like, if you're going into legal stuff,

like I'm not supposed to have Charlie lift more than 15 pounds in his neck brace but i kind of think it's funny when i haul him when i make him haul around kegs and he's waddling around like a penguin and i look over and shucks like waddling with his neck brace and his keg and i'm like that's funny but like it's not that funny like you're getting some sick enjoyment out of sending mr neck brace to haul around like 200 pound kegs. And it actually, one, it stalled my recovery. And two, and additionally. Why do I look like a penguin, too?

This, and I resent that representation because I would actually carry two over my shoulders. No, you did it really dignified. You did it in a really clean, strong way. You were strong. Oh, I saw it live. Don't listen to it. Look at it. You did it in a really clean, strong way. You were strong. Oh, I saw it live. Don't listen to him. Look at it. You seduced my girlfriend.

So we'll not name the name of this manager, but he knew. He did not know. It would be easy to know me and Charlie's names because we have the same name and we're both new hires in the same week. By the way, I had to follow both of you. When I got hired and you guys were both done, I was like, who are your friends with? And I put both of you down. Like, yeah, this isn't a good start, buddy.

We're good enough employees, like, sometimes. But anyway, he called Chuck Backflip because I don't think he knew his name was Charlie. He called him Backflip because he can do a backflip. And he called, I'm pretty sure he just called me neck brace, which seems like not that cool in, in the moment. And that's professional, but it made me think that. Friendship and his neck brace.

And it's like, it was not that it was the other manager who got fired or left or whatever. Can I add one thing? Yeah. Yeah. That was KK versus the W. Yeah.

The amount of money that the owner has lost based on the fact that all the free shit that was poured which bar are you talking about at the w oh never i i remember one incident i'm cusky already told you this too like i ordered two shots of jameson and bartender came over with a bottle of jameson and 12 shot glasses poured all of it into all of it by the way isn't supposed to leave behind the bar with anything what'd you say oh yeah he came to my booth with it too absolutely hammered 12 shots of jameson probably like i don't know i'm thinking 75 it would total out to charge me like two dollars like you guys were insane there like absolutely why do you think we that's the reason we had so many groupies is that's like but like that's not like we did we legit had groupies for that bar oh 100 there there were people who but sort of the kk i had

like my whole long fucking fan club. I think the KK was... You really did. You legit had a fan club. Anyone who had any sort of power to serve or get in... Or cut lines. Or cut lines and get in, you had a fan club. And it was absurd.

And it got to a point where... And I've talked about it on, now I guess, the other show. Where you give, it got to be a problem sometimes where, especially if you're in a bad mood, it sucked. But I worked at New Year's once, and I go to the computer to ring someone up, and I look at Corey, I'm like, I'm screwed. He goes, what are you talking about? I'm like, if I look, if I turn around from Red Bull cooler to Red Bull cooler in the front bar, you know, you both know what I'm like I'm screwed he goes what are you talking about I'm like if I look if I turn around from Red Bull cooler Red Bull cooler in the front bar you know you both know what I'm talking about yeah I know every single person asking for a drink either high school college friend or they work here as well and they just aren't working new years and I had to I had to look at uh Mary

and I had to grab her from the other end of the bar. I'm like, you need a bartender up here now. Like, I know, like, I'm supposed to be up here. I'm like, otherwise we are going to lose out on $300 because I don't have the self-control to tell my childhood friends, hey, man, what you just ordered is $200. Also, like, if you think about it, too, because it shows always at the end of your shift, the revenue you brought in specifically for you as a bartender.

And if anyone saw it, it'd a hundred dollars out of new years that you came in with you'd be absolutely screwed like no matter what it's a weird it's a weird like thing to think about those because at the end of the night if you know how many bars would kill to have six bartenders with anywhere between 1500 and 2500 in sales a person, like so many bars would kill for that. And then you could go on the argument saying, if you didn't give things away, you guys would all be two grand to three grand a piece.

However, if you think about it, like if we didn't do that, I guarantee you 50% of the people probably wouldn't be coming to that bar. 100%. So it's like we rolled the dice with a very risky business decision kind of thing. Did we view it as a business decision? Fuck no. Did it work? Oh, yes.

That bar was packed four nights a week with hemorrhaging money. I mean, we were barely in the the green but we were in the green well let me just say one thing about the w and and that idea specifically there was two ways that people made quote-unquote business decisions to encourage people to come there's one there's the bartenders who have no respect for bill rudy who are i guess the manager oh he could not use his name but yeah uh well let me start that over then let's just we have no so they have no respect for the bartenders on blah blah blah they give away a bunch of free drinks that's one way to bring in customers another way to bring in customers is to keep a fucking clean and tidy bar. Take your bar back.

Keep your bar back, dude. He's very serious. If Thomas or I guess a friend of ours is going to knock down the whole mop bucket on his first day down the stairs right in front of the owner as well. At least it's clean. Yeah, we're going to keep it clean. And for me, it was, I mean, I'd see my peers enjoying drinks with their friends on shift. And I would, I mean, for me, that was always kind of disrespectful to the rest of us there trying to play a clean game. Trying to make an honest living.

Yeah, I'm just, I'm trying, I just was working a $10 an hour job. Trying to make a minimum wage honest living. Yeah, and so, I mean, for me, it was just prompt, clean service. I can't. I feel like you and I are dominating this right now, but I have my first two shifts at the W, bar backing. And I suddenly get, day one, I'm thrown into behind the bar. And I'm like.

Which is ridiculous. Which is ridiculous. Usually you're you're like hey just go around and either make sure people aren't doing blow or pick up drinks and so i'm like i'm picking up dishes and i'm learning as we go and i have this is where we talked about like there's one girl bartender's like hey chop my fucking ice i'm like hey i want to take you home yeah i'll chop your ice i will chop your ice um but i'm i don't know how the dishwashers work and so i just see people like taking dishes out i don't see anyone like doing anything else so i'm just i'm just putting dishes into the dishwasher and i'm like oh this i see steam come out every time someone opens it before. So I'm like, oh, the steam is cleaning it. So I just put it in, closed it, and I'd wait like five minutes.

And then I'd go put the dishes back. Never once ran the dishwasher in my first two days working there. I would literally put someone like COVID would have had a fucking field day during my first two days wow and i would just someone would just take their shot glass i'd grab it put it in there wait five minutes grab it out put it back on the clean stack disgusting then got sent right to the uh to be the bouncer to go to the rooftop do you know how hard of a first day that was? Yeah. And you know,

and that's the worst part of it. Especially people who work there. Like, Hey man, I work here. I can go up. I have never seen a single employee work there. I have 50 different people.

Hey, I work here. I'm going up and I'm sitting there like, and at the time it was like, um, I don't want to put names, but like very prominent people that work there that I'm going full on. Yeah, Dom.

No, no, no. You can't go up. Like holding them back. And they're like, who the fuck is this weirdo? Yeah. Like that was the worst day. But I do agree. Keep a clean bar.

We'll definitely have a packed bar. Yep. If anyone, everyone just needs to know that any college bar is absolutely disgusting. Don't eat the fruit. Don't eat the fruit don't eat the fruit never eat the fruit or honestly the ice container is pretty sketch i was about to bring up like a one time in our back ice cooler thing there was it was it was not like making ice and then like a bunch of it all fell out at once and it was just like packed with sludge on it and it was like i i have to imagine we just like threw it out but it was a ton of ice and we needed ice and so we probably just gave the sludge ice to you wearing your beater during this at least

could have been i mean that that would make part of keeping uh keeping a clean bar is being clean yourself you wake up you make your bed you put on your beater you put on your w jersey and then you go there and you make you make people's days i want to talk about that as like a main point like that's that's something that's underrated about the value that you bring to that bar you're gonna come there you're gonna be wearing a fresh clean white beater and you're gonna be ready to rip that out and people are gonna enjoy that people are gonna like seeing your muscles pop well there's two there's two types of clients one that respect someone who is working at that establishment telling them you need to leave and another that

doesn't quite respond to that so well where you need to pop off the jersey and show them hey i can back it up and i'm gonna yeah i'm gonna beat her and and then if and if you want to if you want some trouble let's step outside i got my brace on i got my brace on let's scrap and then the second yeah the second they step outside you say that's a lifetime band bitch they can never they never walk back in i guess can we talk about lifetime bands do you guys have anyone that you know specifically of yeah oh i dished out a lot of lifetime bans and i had no you have a lifetime ban it's a joke but yeah uh when we first got the id scanner at the w they put my uh our manager put my id in and put me as a lifetime ban obviously he's like

all right it's a joke i can come in whenever i want but i'm pretty sure like five years down the line when no one knows who the fuck i am walking into that bar and i give them my id and they scan me like yeah hell no buddy get the fuck out of here i'm gonna have to call the manager like hey man remember when you did this 10 years ago is it still the same manager or no right now it is yeah well you could honestly do a full podcast on like bartending stories, like from all different bars. It'd get old, but like I'd have fun for a while. It's so funny.

I gave out as a bar back with no authority. I gave out so many lifetime bands. I can't even like, that was, that was my like solution to dealing with people who were like really making me mad. There was like probably, I can honestly remember like five people in my three months that like

actually made me mad because they were so drunk that like they would not listen to the thing. I said it took like a group to get them out. So I would walk them out at the end and they were outside that little like ring and I would just go come back over here. You're banned for life. And I have no authority. I don't even think that exists, honestly. And they would. It does now.

Please, please. I promise I'll never do it again. No. Lifetime ban. Sorry. You're gone for good. Never come back. It's day two on talk shit.

Gone forever. Some I did not see again. Yeah, there was the jersey guy who might, I mean, one, he would just go pick up, like, wounded soldiers everywhere and never paid for a drink. His other signature move that would actually, I think my first time kicking him out was, so he'd always wear a Jason Kidd Brooklyn Nets jersey.

Oh, fuck yeah. And he was swole, but I got it. Roy Swole. I mean, I'd wear my beaters. But anyway, so he would go, and he's not like a bad looking guy, but he'd bring a random girl that he'd meet that night, which I find hard to believe just given how wasted he always was and order a bunch of drinks and then pat his fucking jeans and then

say i don't have my wallet and make these chicks pay for these drinks all the time which like half the time backfires and then you bring a bar back in to be like this guy's broke get out of here do you remember the guy that because i mean it was towards the beginning of my thing so definitely you had him would come with uh stacks of singles and just throw them at the bartender yeah that was like louise or something oh i probably have the same group yeah everyone you would literally just like you like like can I get a water? And then would just chuck a band of 50s at you. Yeah, I know who it is. And then I had to be the loser.

It's like, hey, Michael, I know you're a bar back in his day too, but can you look like a schmuck and just pick up singles all day? I look like the worst stripper ever. Well, that group that he would come in with, they were really good friends with all the bartenders at Wando's. So I know that squad in particular. Because they would go to the W because the old manager of Wando's started working at the W. And they were in the same friend group.

It's ridiculous. It was not my favorite friend group. Don't get me wrong. I love when someone would order water and then throw us 50 the way he did it in which he just would hawk like a a band of 50s like he'd rip the plastic or the paper off and just go hey buddy fetch and then i'm picking i'm picking singles out of the ice machine or like the ice was like definitely don't drink the ice or the fruit right now yeah and yeah i mean there's always the classic thing about like imagining how many people have touched money and it's like imagine that going into your drink too it's like yeah

no no hey don't worry but this ice is sanitary i'm just gonna throw all the money that has been floating around like we're gonna throw it in the ice machine like don't worry about it it's it's gross the fruit is my number one thing and that people shouldn't at least at our bar i feel like it's a lot of bars um i i want to circle back though to what i first i'll give you this back chuck but um the first thing i had when i asked like i wanted like did you have anyone that truly did work their ass off at your bar out of the kk or wandos that just never got the recognition or um like promotion deserved so like especially at where we worked it was in a lot of bars it's girls first because they view it as they're gonna to bring in the most money and truth be told they they are going to bring in the most money guys are usually probably buying

the drinks because they think buying an extra vodka soda is going to change their fucking night and it's not well i don't know i mean think about it this way like do i think there should always be one to two guys on shift hell yeah especially when you have someone like baby daddy um we don't need to say his name but um work in the front bar mr tattoos mr every person wants to talk to him yeah there you go sammy took you a little while to get to that one i have someone in mind that i can think of that answers your question yeah oh i have the exact person it's actually the chicken guy i was gonna say the chat like the cooks at the kk it was always the people on the deep fryer or the stove that like oh yeah that's sweating that's me

profusely trying to like push this food out to the drunk kids like whipping it up quickly but was there any absurd when i bring up like absurd i have an idea like the guy that did the chicken and i told you guys off camera he was told you weren't here for this, I'm sorry, but he was told, you're going to bartend. And, like, that's the worst thing you can tell someone. It's like, oh, you're definitely going to bartend. Because, like, it's not true. Oh, oh, I see what you're saying.

It's like a pipe dream, right? He was like, hey, you'll bartend, but, like, you just got to do this. Oh, my God. So they had him. I promise you're going to be a bartender. That's all the barbacks that shout out. So they had him do No, I promise you're going to be a bartender. That's all the bar backs that shout out. So they had him do this. He worked his ass off through the summer, and they gave him the keys to the bar and said,

You know what? Every Sunday, you're going to Zamboni the floor for us, and you'll bartend by the fall. Never. Who is it? Did he get the chance? I won't. Because of the story before and i already called him the chicken guy it would it's not good can you mouth it to me um yeah i'll mouth to you once i don't have the microphone in front of me that's fair um but yeah that was like the peak of

like dude you got screwed and like he's one of the like sorry like a very hard worker so like he's one of the like, sorry, like a very hard worker. So like he did it. I got a principal wasn't going to quit after one shift. Mr. Whatever. Caribou coffee. But yeah, I thought that was absurd. Like he was like, I'm fucking done with this shit. I'm out. And I gave him so much credit.

Like you're done. That is the reason that like I think how many people would you say started the w at the summer as a barback like 15 yeah maybe a little more every single one of those barbacks was promised a bartending job by the fall yeah and not a single one of them maybe one maybe like one or two but like the moment that they started hiring bartenders off the street after our three months of like grunt work we all quit because we were like we're clearly not going to be bartenders off the street after our three months of like grunt work we all quit because we were like we're clearly not going to be bartenders we're sick of hauling around ice and being screamed at by drunk people like you're not living up to your end of the bargain here like we're done

yeah but we never got zamboni duty yeah i that is bad i remember well like the people who did the zamboni for us did actually they were like managers yeah like but um what did that make me think i mean well so some people quit right when we got back because they felt wronged and they wanted to be a bartender make more money but again not to like come back to this but for me it was about providing tidy strong service to people making sure the bar was clean charlie was always a man of service yeah that's actually my that's my favorite i wouldn't call myself a people person but i i did very much enjoy like so we'd have we'd have these buddies we'll call them sid and mountain man uh actually we won't well yeah thing one thing two is better so they come up they see that we're working not that that really makes a difference they go and puke behind these red bull tables i go up to find uh actually one of them does that the other one goes and goes nuclear on the

bathroom puking everywhere and so i mean they could rely on me to be the guy with a with a mop bucket and a smile and not every bar would say you're not getting kicked out and actually please puke all over our floors, but I like to stay busy. I think the biggest one thing I want to point out to anyone that possibly wants to work at either the W or the KK, I would say the two contrasts here is that the W makes more money. You guys don't have to work your way up.

You guys do have to just split tips basically second though here's where you get fucked you guys clean until like 4 or 5 a.m every single night you guys make more money though no we don't yeah depends on when you think about how many people are staffed at the w versus the kk it doesn't matter because the thing is you start at a bar you start at at C-Bar, which is the worst bar there. You would make probably $60 and A-Bar or B-Bar will make like $250. Yeah. So it really depends.

We're not splitting tips. On a good night, though, like if it's not a game day or something, I remember being tipped out on what I would consider a good night, $50, $60. That's a really good night. For a bar back. That's a bar back. We got back. That's a bar back. We got to emphasize that's a bar back. But you guys did get to get wasted on the job.

We didn't get to sit anything. We had our perks. Yeah. I would take. We were never told to. Yeah. Strictly against the rules. We need to emphasize that.

That was just your own rule. We have. Making our money back. I think we can't do this whole thing on W, but I want to say my favorite, one of my favorite stories, not even stories, but like, to say one of my favorite stories, not even stories, but like, and it's you, Chuck, one or two.

One. You, I was always told, and this is why I started doing this, you were one of the people that would go back into the cooler and before they got rid of the margarita mix, would just take cups and just start chugging it. And then when you quit, there is a quote-unquote video of you opening a bottle of Grey Goose in the liquor cooler and then flipping off the camera. That was when I was still employed.

Yeah. I thought you were quitting like very soon or something like that. About a month. I heard it was like the day you quit. No, no, no. That was my 21st yes my punishment for that for flicking off the owner and screaming at the owner fuck you in the cameras was to do dishes for 15 minutes in the kitchen Benny Phil got destroyed for letting me back there as if

he could have stopped me um who would win in a fight, you or Ben Phil? Oh, let's do that. Who would win in a fight? All right, who would win in a fight, me or Adam? Adam. Benny Phil. Take both of you down. Joe Budden.

Joe Budden for sure. I don't know. I'll answer last. I'm not going to lie. I'd love to hear my girl backing me up there. I got you, baby. Don't worry. But I got't know. I'll answer last. I'm not going to lie. I'd love to hear my girl backing me up there. I got you, baby. Don't worry. But I got Charlie.

I haven't decided. I'm thinking through. Here's the thing that Kuski might not consider. I have a savage energy that's just waiting to be unleashed within me. It's the kind of thing that I, you know know it'll hurt when it comes at you yeah you lost because of that answer i agree you think so 100 yeah here's the thing i don't agree i absolutely don't agree i have something within me that wants to absolutely kill you i've wanted to kill you ever since i met you so you're doubling down on the dumb answer i take can i retract my answer there we go sammy come back please sometimes you just do too much i want like legit answers from both of you though

i don't know so what type of fight is it a drunk or sober fight do you think that would matter i think yeah i don't know well just tell me what it is because if it's like you guys are are prepared to fight not that you'd get to train or something but like if it's like we're going to meet at noon dead sober and fucking fight on good footing like clean floors i don't i'm not not again like w could provide that right if i'm working but um 1 a.m on but just in general, I feel like if it's a thing where you're both wasted, I guess I've just seen Adam

more wasted more often. Therefore, it would make me think Adam has had a disadvantage because he's going to be all slopped up. I don't get slopped up. Or inebriated. You just lose your limbs. But what is the fight?

Because that affects my answer. I think... Is it verbal or physical? Is it a fist fight? Is it grappling? If it's verbal, I win. Hands down. I don't think you do.

Yeah, I think I win the verbal one for sure. Let's meet in the middle. We fight right now. Okay. Not drunk. Should you do it? Are you not drunk at all? Are you?

I'm drinking. Are you hammered? No. I think that's what we're getting at. So you're slopped up, just as my earlier suspicion. I wouldn't call me slopped up right now, but, I mean, I've got some liquid confidence in me. That would be my honest answer. And I don't think I win.

Let's go first. Let me let us answer. So Adam thinks it's him. Sammy thinks it's Adam. We need three mic votes if we're going to get there. I'm going Adam. I was going to say, you already don't have it. I don't think I win that one. Why, Adam?

It's that energy. I've seen a rage it's um I don't know yeah I don't think he could get that rage going against me I think he'd be tried I think you'd have to target it at someone else and I know I think he'd get I don't know who I don't I don't know I don't know if it even matters who if you get if Adam gets one swift punch to the jaw I don't think it matters who's on the other end. That rage is being channeled. Doesn't matter who it is. The thing that I think Kuski is right about is that I wouldn't get to that rage point. I really wouldn't.

Especially with Kuski. Such a good guy. Yeah, I love Kuski. He's the best guy. I love him to death. If I bring my rage up to 10, I can whip anyone's ass. But I could probably only bring my rage meter up to 4. And as much as I would love to dispel everything that Charlie's saying,

he's absolutely fucking right. I couldn't get up there. I couldn't get there. Couldn't get it up. I can't get it up most times. Should we talk about the low T? Anyone ever had a time where you sit there and you wonder, do I not have enough testosterone?

Can you not break this? You got to lead up to what happened, though. Oh, I mean, the real point. If we're allowed to talk about it. I have no problem talking about it. Am I allowed to take this mic and get the town on it? You know what I mean? Also, I'll just say it. adam doubled down on his dumb idea and then when people voted for him he said just kidding i'm not gonna get to the rage level i'm gonna get my ass pounded i'm actually changing

my i haven't i haven't cast my vote although so adam's getting like fucking huge in the last couple months so he's all strong as part of the problem, but he's not very coordinated, and therefore it's hard to say. If he was coordinated, he could execute simple things like taking coffee out of a microwave, executing a small, short to-do list. That has nothing to do with strength. Mental coordination is equally as important as physical coordination in a fight. Does it help that I was a gymnast for a bit? How flexible are you? Not as flexible as I was, but probably more flexible than Adam.

Can you go palms down? Yeah. Okay, I can too. He's definitely more flexible than me. Well, then that changes a lot. Nothing. Everything. A lot.

Well, if he's got – I'm scrambled now. If he has a longer range on his trunk rotation that's powering the fists he's throwing i mean i don't know i gotta go mike gotta go mike wow i think i still think it's you like i'm not one to ask the question because i think i would win a fight i'd like genuinely curious for buell's answer you definitely have a bigger chest than adam but you you don't have the chest hair that will compete that's true your your punches are getting absorbed by a lot of hair

yeah there's a full forest that brings it from an a to a four my devil piercings get stuck in that. We're making love. And yes, we make love. We don't have sex. We make love. And you don't get the microphone anymore. Oh, no. Make sure you're talking in the right side of that. Does it say back?

All right, you're good. Yeah, let's get off the who would win over what. I'm definitely bigger alpha male than Adam. You have way more BDE. But Adam... Literally has the BD. He's got the hog. But, I don't know.

Adam's a little wily. I think if you maybe... Well, okay. We're moving on. We're moving on. I don't know what we're moving on we're moving on i don't know what we're moving on to um actually i do want to address the fact that this is actually a new show so a bang does not need to be consumed but i'm gonna be pretty upset if that does not get consumed by the end

of the night what this candy apple crisp bang bang energy yeah i don't care if we all go and cue the ad for bang energy drinks how about this while us four consume it really quickly you run through our sponsorship we already have because what we're ace hardware um what was the other one sun cream productions sun cream productions is a huge one that i think i think mcdonald's disney hasbro hasbro goodwill goodwill especially i think let's just run it back again though to sun cream productions joe budden his show button podcast yeah yeah so if you if you could do a few ad reads why while i force feed some energy down these boys' throats. We're really into eugenics, too.

Adam's been struggling a lot with his testosterone level. So he's been taking it a lot lately, and we've seen improvement. Do you want to care to chime in? Well, sometimes my dick don't work. And that's just the plain truth and and you know you gotta yeah you gotta sit there and you gotta wonder is it me is it my testosterone what is the issue but with nugenics you don't have to wonder it's you you sick freak and it will help and that's our sponsor no i mean there's i i want to give a shout out to the people out there

that there are people that are listening to your laugh over and over again and they love my laugh okay i just have i needed to hear charlie's everyone's take on this adam's laugh to me is like a car starting it's not not attractive. Disagree. Oh, come on. Can you laugh real quick? Like, you know when it's not clicking and it's still going? That's what it sounds like to me. It's kind of like that. Let's bag on the podcaster when he's not podcasting.

Let's let him breathe a little bit. He's been the topic of a few things here. Oh, a few things. You got to move on. Do you want the hot seat? I love you, man. Wait, should we all just take turns ripping on someone? Do you think Adams is done?

Have you not already been doing that on me? I think I've taken a lot of heat. That wouldn't be taking turns. Yeah, I was about to say. It wouldn't apply to switching. But let's talk about world peace. World peace. Oh, fucking Christ.

Well, they can't see the sweatshirt, but wearing a world peace sweatshirt, it's probably the most important thing that's gone on in my life. Oh, fucking Christ. Well, you can't see the sweatshirt, but wearing a world peace sweatshirt, it's probably the most important thing that's gone on in my life. It's a life sucker. It's not. That's why I'll do it. Wait, hold on. Read that again. Read that again.

Bang energy. Bang is not your stereotypical high sugar life sucking soda masquerading as energy drink. Bang energy. Sponsor. Maybe. Oh, boy. So who suffers from erectile dysfunction? Oh, I've been there.

All of you. Here's what I'll say. You're saying that when you had a few drinks, you're shooting pool with a rope. Oh, someone is stealing some lines over here i totally did what you're not all four of you you've never experienced that all right i had a month and i it freaked me out where it just didn't happen again hi mom um sorry mom you know it needs to be gone by the end of this What do you think is going to happen tonight?

We're two episodes Oh you're side-sitting What's your story? I want to hear it My goodness this candy apple crisp flavor Was so refreshing for me I feel energized And alive for the first time In my miserable 25 years

And it's not soul-sucking Stop the skull-crushing Fucking weight of reality and alive for the first time in my miserable 25 years. And it's not soul sucking. Stop the skull crushing fucking weight of reality. So back to, yeah, it was literally just like a month, and it just didn't work. And I think once it happens once, you're like, oh, it's because I'm drunk. Once it happens a second time and you're aware of it, you're like, this is now a mental thing. And if you can't talk yourself out of it, oh, time and you're aware of it you're like this is now a mental thing and if you can't talk yourself out of it oh boy you're screwed and it was like a month that makes

it sound like i'm getting laid every fucking month i'm not i think it was three incidences all right probably the best month of my life kuski i gotta ask you a question have you ever gotten to the point where you're talking about this well i mean that's That would be a great point to bring up, but we're talking more about a point about We're talking more about a point about the concept of you get through that point and you say, hey, it's not my mental.

Maybe I need to start getting blood work on my dick. You ever gotten there? Because Poppy has. And that's where we cue the eugenics again. Blue Chew. Yeah, no. I have not. It was like that brief instance, and it freaked me out. And then I had an instance with a lovely lady that it didn't happen.

Or it happened, I guess. I'm like, I'm back, baby. That's an amazing feeling, I'm sure. I was like, holy shit, I don't have a problem. Adam and I got to a point, though. And we brought up the night sweats before. But where his dick wouldn't work. And he was having night sweats.

So you Google search both of those and what comes up is low testosterone. There's a picture of Adam's face. Might also say run. And that's when we went

and did the blood work. You just took a sip of Bang & O's all good. Oh yeah, and by the way, when your dick don't work, drink Bang Energy. True. Bang Energy. Do you ever find yourself down on your luck, flaccid in a Denny's parking lot?

Take a sip of Bang Caramel Apple and you'll be beating the shit out of a hobo with a crowbar. Sponsored by Bang. Hey, for a real point for all those people out there where your dick just don't work right sometimes you gotta go get this crowd give them their message here's here's the real message that's coming to them you go get blood work and sometimes you realize it ain't your testosterone it's your anxiety that is absolutely fucking you in the ass and and what are you gonna do in that case well question blood work where do they draw it from your urethra straight urethra they they put the syringe in your dick they put

it up your pee hole and they they say, well, hold tight. Hold your breath. And this is going to hurt a little bit, but just hold your breath. It's going to be all right. They need a small piss draw, so they'll do an incision on the bottom of your bean bag. Get a little bit of your piss to make sure your boner is working right. And then. And no matter what happens. I have a question for charlie you're gonna be

disappointed it's called remember the time that you asked me if you could have sex with my pee hole um it was in different language but yes was that ever successful i guess did you do it with another lady well when i learned and how did you happen upon wanting i didn't necessarily want to do it i just want i was thinking about the anatomy of the situation and i thought nobody talks about pee holes enough and i wanted to have an insider's take talk to the source you have a vagina with a pee hole in it and so i figured i needed answers also theoretically let's just talk about the you know the logistics of the situation is kuski's mom still listening she's listening hey hey kuski's mom your pee hole should be tighter than your regular vagina you make it sound like you're talking directly to my mother she doesn't know

kuski's mom he's staring me in the eyes i swear to god we could test it out and figure it out You make it sound like you're talking directly to my mother. She doesn't know. Kuski's mom. He's staring me in the eyes, I swear to God. We could test it out and figure it out. All right, Adam's done. Take the mic away. Yeah, we're done sharing a mic. You go share with Sammy. I have a girlfriend.

I didn't mean that. Moving on. You dug your way out of that one. Moving. Thank that. Moving on. You dug your way out of that one. Moving. Thank God. Moving on. This is a general theme of the other one, but hey, what's your take on aliens? Aliens are real.

I mean, let's get deep into this. Aliens are real. That is my take in all seriousness. 100%. Aliens are real. In all seriousness. 100%. Aliens are real. And also, I think all of the various animals that are, like, the mythical creatures, like,

fucking Loch Ness Monster, Bigfoot, those are all also real, in my view. But, I mean. Wait, monsters are real? Like, Loch Ness? Some monsters, like Godzilla, like, fake monsters aren't real. But Bigfoot's real. Loch Ness Monster, real. Sasquatch.

Get the hand out of your face. Yeah, no, I think all those are real. Are you side-sipping the bang, too? Uh-oh. Well, if one of us had COVID, we all do now. You want to get all fucked up side sip a bang you dumb bitch bang energy um chuck one your take on aliens me yeah i think aliens are real i mean i think there's got to be some other life forms in the universe that is constantly

expanding and bigger than we can comprehend. I think it's small minded. What do you think about the UFO situation? And do you think it's a planned thing that they tell us during the middle of pandemic? Hey, we got stuff going on just because it can get overshadowed. That's something that people are doing to distract you from what's actually

going on. Or do you think it's actually real? I don't know. I think it's, I think actually going on or do you think it's actually real i don't know i think it's i think it's going on i think it's to think that we're the only civilization in the universe that can create vehicles i also think is small all right real quick one up the alien i think more so than that is like the universe is pretty big so yeah which is to my point probably so generic you think the universe pretty big yeah i don't have an exact metric but the universe is big ish for sure um isn't it it's decent yeah it's it's decent make sure it doesn't say back and what

she's talking into i think she is is. Yeah, flip it upside down. 45 minutes of mic ruffling for the listeners? Mic ruffling around? She's like talking to Tweedledee and Tweedledummas. Nope. I don't need Adam to have any of this mic. There you go. Yeah, talking that way.

I want to bring this up. I took a screenshot. I'm a big Daily Mail guy. I love running through it uh every conspiracy theories and shit no it's like it's like a snapchat like news store thing um it's basically just like the kardashians and then a few weird things um but this one it says more disasters for 2021 blind Blind a mystic. And that's where I'm going to go with, do you believe in, like, people who predict the future? Because there have been people like, oh, 2020, the world's going to end or, like, shit like that.

They predicted the virus. Who predicted 9-11 says New Year holds cataclysms and a strong dragon. In 2021 dragon In 2021 In 2021 We had a dragon probably We had a fucking dragon show up Wait what are the predictions Sorry

It holds cataclysms and a strong dragon This lady predicted 9-11 It says Like to the day predicted 9-11 I just took a screenshot of the beginning Did she do it off the 9 calendar or was it like standard notation Has she predicted anything other predicted 9-11 um i just took a screenshot at the beginning calendar or was it like standard notation has she predicted anything other than 9-11 um because that could just be chance i mean look at her she clearly sees the future her eyes are closed well she can't see anything about it yeah um there well i don't know so i think So I think there's only one person who has ever convincingly been able to see the future,

and it's super loose and not that accurate. But Nostradamus. I thought you were going to say Larson again. They're going to say you for your card trick. Yeah, well, I have some ability to pull a thought out of someone's brain. What about me with Steph Curry? What? So, I will move past it.

I mean, I don't know. Adam claims he likes Steph Curry before he blew up. But Adam actually just ordered a Steph Curry jersey once he made his first All-Star game. And now claims that he knew Steph Curry was always going to be great. 2013. But I digress. In general, don't believe it. And every time that there has been something where it's like you need to be scared,

like there's a prediction coming like Y2K, which I guess is not like a prediction thing. But then also end of Mayan calendar. It's all been bullshit. So, like, no. Well, I think a lot of it, too, is it's so general and so broad. So, yesterday or two days ago, Sammy read us this passage out of her book. The Daily Stoic. The Daily Stoic thing.

That's an ad, too. Which was a little more, like, direct. But it reminded me of the worst people on this planet who read and believe their horoscope. And I feel like if you could be my co-star we are big co-star fans you could predict anything like i could say next year is gonna have like a big bang that big bang can mean fucking anything that's true like that big dragon that dragon can mean anything it could mean like fire it could mean the asian takeover of the western world that's true that's true i well i don't know i struggle so it's easy to believe that they actually predict something yeah unless she legitimately said hey covid 19's

gonna run through 2020 you have no credibility in my mind i agree with you and it comes back to something we were talking about the other day with ghosts is like is is this just the human's minds the human minds wantingness to find pattern in something and especially astrology is a little bit different than the ghost thing we were talking about because that is actively prompting you with the ghost thing it's like you feel it's kind of more truly personal but like the with astrology i mean when you read say a paragraph a day that will prep you you then will look for things that fulfill that whether you're doing it subconsciously or not like so to me i'm sorry for doing a pattern no i i agree we do look for patterns.

But that's not I don't know. I agree with what Charlie's saying in that regard. But like there are a lot of really weird universal things that do happen. Like what I was telling you the other day. Yeah. Yeah. But back to like also astrology, like we used to have this thing where we'd all send our co-stars because the coaster comes out with a do and don't list.

What's a what? Hon, sorry. Inform me. It's an astrology app where you put in like the exact minute you were born it'll tell you your uh your sign your moon like all other sorts of astrology stuff and then on a daily basis it tells you people to avoid or uh like try and reach out to and also'll tell you daily do's and don'ts here just to give an example of what my do and don'ts are today today yes do scissors old magazines and glue sticks that's like a scrapbook thing that makes sense i thought it was a lesbian thing digression verbiage and footnotes oh you're talking a lot right now verbiage well and digression digret well let's think about that

as we move forward in the podcast no digression strict i'll shut up topic no no no that's not no digressions but the digressions are the best part i think okay well only digressions then um chuck digression no no you can't you can't completely ignore digressions. Footnotes, though. Fuck those. I'm in bang hour. I'm in bang hour. Well, the footnotes, I think, at least on the soundboard, are worthwhile, and I will

continue. We do need to bring back some sound effects, and that's just... My phone is dead, but... I got it. You got it? Yeah. Well, there are a few chargers. You guys got, like, a million chargers underneath here.

Um, so last Christmas, I bought us a bunch of chargers. They all now do not work. Half of them didn't work when I bought them. And then I also bought these little animals that you put on the ends of your cords so that it doesn't, like, break. I saw that, yeah. What is that? They're pretty much just, like, cute and cute and like people think they're really cool. Most people.

But it didn't help the cords because they're all fucking broken. So don't shop on Amazon. Amazon and fuck you Bezos too. Sponsored by Amazon. Yeah. Any Bezos thoughts? Quick. Anybody?

He's taking over the world. That's a general thought. Here's a general thought on Bezos thoughts? Quick. Anybody? He's taking over the world. That's a general thought. Here's a general thought on Bezos. And it goes into a general thought on Zuckerberg. Your favorite? Everyone who knows me, this is Adam Weintraub talking, if you didn't know. I hate Mark Zuckerberg. I want to kill him with a gun. Jesus Christ. knows me this is adam weintraub talking if you didn't know yeah i hate mark zuckerberg i want

to kill him with a gun okay mark zuckerberg i know you're gonna find this through your audio you know transcripting service that you have but guess what i'm gonna kill you and he's kidding he's kidding he's kidding yeah she's she's trying to save me because she doesn't want me to die. But here's the case, okay? Bezos is a bastard. All he's doing is taking over and monopolizing every single service that we have to consume data. And guess what's going to happen with that? Everyone's worried about TikTok and China taking over our data. What do you think Amazon is doing?

Do you think Amazon is not doing the same exact thing? Do you think Facebook is not doing the same exact thing? you think facebook is not doing the same exact thing do you want me to go on a rant right now i'm angry and i'm drunk i'll do it and i won't right now because this is a piece no you know here's the thing it's a it's a pg-13 podcast we're keeping it pg-13 i'm gonna keep it that way i haven't heard one bad thing about bezos or zuckerberg in the start of this rant you haven't well what do you dislike about the data harvesting like what is the i mean obviously we all don't like like that we have to give data to people how about cambridge analytica yeah that how about the entire 2016 election being influenced by facebook does that not bother you that's not that's a conspiracy that is absolutely How about the entire 2016 election being influenced by Facebook?

Does that not bother you? That's a conspiracy that is absolutely based in fact. There's absolutely 100% fact to base that, too. I have a hard time sitting here and saying that it is a conspiracy theory when you can sit here and literally trace everything that Zuckerberg is doing. I'm completely kidding. But I'm glad it riled you up oh it riled me the fuck up my thought on well bezos or zuckerberg is i feel that there is a personal piece of this too like i don't like either of them and i don't like what they do and

i think they can and should do more when you one have all all of that data at your fingertips but then additionally like have such a huge voice being the head of a social media platform and essentially the most widespread supply chain company in the world. There's a lot of good you can do. That's part of the reason I don't like either of them, and I think they mishandled it. But I feel like with you,

it might be a little more personal with Zuck specifically. His hero. He bested you. Turned enemy. He beat you to the punch on facebook i wouldn't call it he was born before me that that's where i would say he beat me to the punch that's where i would disagree about beat me to the punch like what you wanted me as like uh you know eight year old to sit here and be like yeah i'm ready to take down i wanted you to do less goo goo gaga titty sucking and more making a multinational social media platform yeah you

know what i wasn't at harvard you know deciding whether we were gonna say that a girl looked like a horse or a hot sexy chick i mean that's what everyone forgets about that that's what facebook started as it was is this girl hot or do i pick the other girl who's a dog that's what everyone forgets about that that's what facebook started as it was is this girl hot or do i pick the other girl who's a dog that's what facebook started as and he based it all off of harvard social media which was based off of essentially face smash i mean it was face smash but you know i mean it people uploading whatever fucking picture they uploaded like everyone everyone he pulled pictures from the databases that were in the Harvard

database that they pulled from Harvard. But like, come on. Like, what? Like, what picture do you have on fucking Wisconsin? It would be my whiskmail picture where I actually have the world's first and only perfectly upside down smile. The one thing about Charlie in this picture that

I will completely agree with is he looks fucking good in this picture. And so I completely agree why he's trying to justify himself in the era of face smashes. Because he would win. He would win every single competition that came through it. He would win

every one. And guess what? I would not. Fuck you. Here's my, here's my thing with the Bezos Zuckerberg thing is like, I guess if you took a poll of the people in the country, the world, whatever,

who do you hate Zuckerberg? Do you hate Bezos? It would probably be overwhelming. Yes. But if you were to ask those same people, do you have a Facebook still? Do you still order from Amazon prime or would you trade places with Yes. But if you were to ask those same people, do you have a Facebook still? Do you still order from Amazon Prime or would you trade places with them?

Well, I don't even know about that. But like they've taken the basic human needs of convenience and, you know, wanting to be part of a community and done something that now is seems irreversible. I don't know how either of them without some crazy shit happening is gonna like disappear it's not gonna go away and like the people who hate those things are still gonna use them because it plays to the basic human needs so like i don't like it but i can't say that like no at one point do you if you build something like that and it grows and grows and grows do you just finally say no stop we're done you can't you can't not saying again against anyone or anything but it is kind of hard to start something that's that quote-unquote important or pivotal to our society and be like no we're done just like i give up i'm not doing this anymore we're going to stay here we We're not going to evolve.

I guess a piece of my problem is that if you call both of these people geniuses, you would think that when they're, or I guess at least like Zuckerberg in the Senate or any other really like legal thing where people are peppering him with questions and his answer to half this shit is like it was an oversight like i'm i was unaware of this it's kind of like well if you're if you're this genius you would think you'd have a little bit more forethought or any sort of like plan to address like the widespread issues with what you do by the way speaking of bezos would you like to open that amazon prime package yeah go ahead my mom's up too, I got this for Charlie for his birthday. This would be good.

This will lighten the mood a bit. I like this. Wow. My mom was saying to look out for a package I must not have gotten here. That's cool.

I might have been one of my doorstoppers. Let's see. What did you get? No. We said for gifts for each other it was a $100 limit. I know, it went all out.

You didn't even get close. Oh, yeah. What book is that? Cheese to a Wraith? Wait, what is that? David and Goliath, Malcolm Gladwell, Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants. I know you said you want to read it.

You're going down. It's my second book I've gotten in the last few days. Yeah, but they delivered it to him. Amazon brought it. And I bought it off of Amazon. They're ruling the world. Cha-ching. Well, thank you, Sammy.

All right, so tits or ass? I'll read it. He didn't get you anything. Just let you know. I'll read it. He didn't get you anything. Just let you know. I'll go last. I got Charlie a very good gift. I don't want to take that heat, frankly. How much Zin did you get for me?

Sponsored by Zin. I believe I got five tens. Thank you very much. Market value, $45 here in Minnesotanesota what's that book valued at the book is valued at well given that this is signed by malcolm gladwell and i won't show that to anyone else um probably a couple hundred but i mean like and it has her footnotes. Like, what do you think is valued in knowledge? But actually, it's a don't to do footnotes. But pardon, what'd you say, Mike?

I said tits or ass, but. Yeah, so again, I'll go last here. What would my equal question be? I feel like Adam would have this be zero. Hog size or nipple size? No. Oh, no. Tong size or nipple size? No. Oh, no. Tongue or dick?

Truth or lie. Or what if you... No, how about like... Yeah, no. Arms or ass. How about that? Arms or ass. No, arms or ass.

Upper body, lower body maybe? I don't know. Yeah. Huge lower body, bro. I care about his huge thighs. People comment though on Adam's big ass. That's a good question. What do you think are the two most, besides penis, like, the two...

On the man? About a man, like, the two things girls look at the most that are, like, I would say, like... Strictly body, not, like, physical features. Yeah, strictly body. You can't go face. Like, fuck. Yeah. Definitely abs and arms.

Abs and arms. Okay, so abs or arms. Like, fuck, yeah. Definitely abs and arms. Abs and arms. Okay, so abs or arms. What are you? Specifically to Adam or generally speaking? Generally speaking. Which means that the answer is different when it comes to Adam. No. That you brought that up.

I just, I think Adam has really nice arms. But, so I would say I have obviously arms for Adam. But also, like. But in general. As long as they're not fat, I'd be fine. I would obviously arms for Adam, but also like... But in general... As long as they're not fat, I'd be fine. I would think arms for sure. Arms? It looks nice.

Do you think in the past you've always been arms? I think most of my ex-boyfriends are just built all around. You are too. Don't worry. Shape the fuck up. So like I can't, I never had to choose one or the other. Okay. Okay. So then, because i'll add on to ours what would be one trait that maybe isn't so common but that you really enjoy or like or look for like teeth eyes nose hair body type hair or body type yeah like it's nice when

they have an ass, too. I would say that. Because, like, it's tough to, like, look down. Okay, I feel like asses and cocks, that could be, like, us saying, I like when they have legs. Yeah, exactly. So let's get, like, an odd one. I don't.

The one thing I will say with that is a girl with nice legs, like, what? That doesn't matter. But, no, no, no. He is saying, as far as the comment of saying ass that is a credible comment but the the distinction is we're moving to things that are not like purely purely body and i i guess i think teeth and like eyes are as well but like non i have one i have one that non-stereotypical like what you go for like a man that wears a chain or has something like that immediately makes them more attractive don't know why it's a thing all right so yours is style then

that's not style it really adds to like sex appeal in some regard don't know why we gotta find some i would say you do you need a chain having it tucked in i don't think but like do you think there are some guys, I don't mean to cut you off, that, like, can't rock one? No. And I think I'm one of them. No. I don't think I could do... I think all three of you guys could do it. I...

Chains. If you had a big Flava Flav clock... Yeah, Harwell has one on right now. I think every... I... I... You know, as a person that wears a chain. Let's not say chain.

You don't have a fucking chain. It's a cross necklace. Just a gold necklace. Like a hard piece of string around it. Yeah, it's a very, you know, minimalistic, whatever you want to call it. But that's worse than the ZZZ. But no i mean it's it is an accentuating piece like that's that's all it really is it's like hey like it doesn't really add anything to like what your body already is but it kind of accentuates it for sure yeah i think that's a really good and

chest hair especially too oh fuck like a huge forest on their chest. Down their stomach. That's what I look for. The chain just gets lost in there. That's my fucking girl right there. Maybe. But I don't fart. All right. My answer.

Yeah, let's get to the guy's answers. Let's get to the guy's answers. My answer is for the other non-body feature. No, we want to hear the main body feature first. So I guess ass. Okay. For me. But the other one would be teeth and smile.

You can have perfect teeth and still have kind of a weird smile, but that's definitely a big one for me, I would say teeth. I might almost completely agree with you. It's definitely ass man, teeth. And actually, I think just like someone who smiles consistently. Consistently as in they have the same smile or they smile often? They smile often. Yeah, no, I totally agree with that.

I have a question for Charlie. Do you think that once I go to Disney World, my gums will grow about an inch bigger? So Disney World is in Epscot, Florida, no? Yes. I can't even say that seriously. Epstale? What is it?

Epler? Epcot. Epcot. I mean, it's in Orlando. It's in Orlando. Why would your gums grow? You've never seen the memes that are Disney girls that have the gums that are an inch bigger than the rest of the society?

Well, I haven't been on TikTok. I don't know. What the fuck is she saying? Never mind. We'll move past this. Yeah. inch bigger than the rest of the society well i haven't been on tiktok i don't know never mind yeah yeah i mean sammy sammy acts like it's not a thing it's a thing we need to hear chuck one's answer my answer that hasn't been said is eyes we need the stereotypical one though Ass or tits Ass And eyes Okay so ass and eyes Or ass and teeth What did you say?

I said ass and teeth probably Not my answer at all Ass and eyes for sure A house divided Yeah it's a house divided Can I choose mine? On a girl? On a eyes for sure all right so we're a house divided yeah it's a house divide can i choose mine on a girl on a good girl yeah i would say ass for sure because that's like very rare oh this is a product of our generation it's definitely ass people it is but also like tits are nice even small like our generation would imply that sammy is in our generation and she's an older lady i'm off by

one single year you're 40 you're 42 stop lying yes fuck um but i would say teeth yes bad teeth are really bad like you you really stay okay let's let's add on top of this favorite thing you already kind of did and with the chain like a besides a chain favorite thing or accessory a guy can wear charlie if you don't say scrunchie in your hair my hair mine's easy we would do girls or whatever you're sexually into are you trying to say something no i'm just trying to appeal to everyone that may or may not be listening um because we're an inclusive podcast oh i thought you were hinting that no i wasn't a man or woman recognizably what we're hinting adam may like

penis but i thought adam okay anyways i want to just touch on that i thought adam was gay for the first three hours that i knew him and met him. I've been accused of that. Because he told me that. So, no, no, no, let's not go down this road. Let's not go down the road. We won't go down this road, but the thing that I will mention is that it was, first of all, it worked.

No one ever acknowledged it. It worked. was first of all it worked no one ever acknowledged it worked it worked to say i was gay the first time that i met sammy it worked second of all compulsive liar second of all i don't know i don't even know if i have a second of all yeah you just want to hear your own voice right now yeah is that so wrong husky what was your question accessory like so if she has like a little little kind of traveler's bible tucked away in her purse and we could read a psalm before before we either enjoy a dinner or a matinee and like she orders drinks at the bar and she has us hold hands and say grace kind of thing yeah before vegas bomb yeah yeah that's kind of my that's like my accessory for these

are bombs yeah that we are about to consume yeah yeah that's it for me that's fine i have one what's your legit one um well let me think because that's all yeah you have one i have one go here's a real one then and you don't find out clear answer either. You have one? I have one. I have one too. Here's a real one. And you don't find out this until you hook up with a girl. But nipple piercings. Fucking beautiful. Beautiful thing. You're such a suck up.

Oh, am I? Can I have a take you're not going to like on nipple piercings? I know there's a lot of house divided on nipple piercings if they carry a pack of chicken nibblers this is my take and maybe because i've had personal experience with it but this is my take i prefer one over two oh why i wonder why just cuz do you like the look of it one is in my head like i could but i'm not like freaky kind of thing rather than like i'm just balls to the walls let's fucking do this kind of thing which not gonna lie you kind of are with the way last week or two days ago when hands down i don't have that little sweet innocent don't worry i like tiny and i will not discriminate against both because i'm not dating

you i know i know about it but i'm definitely a one over two kind of guy but if i had to pick my accessory it would be glasses really glasses as a plus glasses as a plus huge is there an x factor if it is a non-prescription glasses like she's wearing it purely solely for the style is that also if you're wearing glasses without like lenses in them you can kick rocks yeah but if i don't look for style like i get i get why that would be better like looks wise but let's for the like i guess meet in the middle i don't want you like if i don't have my glasses i can't see the hand in front of me. But I also don't want the person that's like, oh, my God, I'm wearing glasses.

That's the worst. Like the ones you guys remember when people would steal them from the movie theater. Like they're a color. Yes. Like if you see someone with glasses on and like, hey, I could still poke you in your eye right now, kick rocks. Lick a bat. I don't want you to be here. Unless it's Halloween.

Yeah, unless it's Halloween. That's one day out of the year. But I think in general, I find glasses pretty attractive. I like it too. Especially. Are you sleepy there, big guy? No, I'm thinking of my answer. I'm going to give you some more bang if you don't.

I think I got my answer. I want to hear Charlie and Charlie's take on nipple piercings. One or two. Or none. That's the best part is we're joking around that there's multiple chucks here, but we have two chucks. And I have nipple piercings. You are nipple piercings.

I don't think. To me, I do not consider it a 0-1-2. I think piercing, no piercing. I get what you're saying, to me, I do not consider it a 0-1-2. I think piercing, no piercing. I get what you're saying, Mike, but I guess I don't necessarily have a preference. I mean, I like both. Yeah. But, I mean, I think they're definitely interesting. Like, I think, well, I wonder too.

I don't know. I don't have a hard preference on that one. I don't. I'm with you. Yeah. No. Never been so much. The thing is, I wouldn't say. I don't have a hard preference on that one. I don't. I wouldn't say it's hard. I definitely prefer one over the other. If there's two, I wouldn't be like, you know what?

I just can't do this kind of thing. You get a girl naked and you see both peers and you're like, I'm sorry, but against my morals, you have two of them too freaky back the fuck up I'm going home I'm gonna put you in a different room trust me if

certain someone listens at the laugh um you'll know the person um but yeah it I do like the piercing just one over two we do need to hear your accessory. Here's my answer.

I don't think this is going to be serious, I feel like. It is serious. I would say hidden tattoo. Ooh, that's a good one. That's a good one. So like a lawnmower on my pubic bone. It doesn't even need to be sexual. I just think there's something about a tattoo that you didn't get for anyone to see.

But if you get to know someone and then you discover they have a tattoo and there's a story behind that i think that's cool like daffy duck right yeah daffy does mostly daffy duck okay if we can stay in the loony the loony tunes yeah new school um new school oh yeah you missed the mark dude i keep all i cannot wait to watch the finale of that. Yeah, that's going to be great. Oh, my God. Man, I don't want to just say pass, but I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I do not have an answer right now. You don't have one?

Just throw out a few things. Because when we're talking about accessories, that makes me think. Accessories is like certain kinds of earrings I was thinking about. I think it's a broad term, but almost why knit might help. Like, what's a, maybe like an odd kink kind of thing. I'm not talking like, hey, tie me up and hit me with some hot candle wax. I think you kind of got the gist of it. Glasses, tattoo, nipple piercings, toe rings.

Toe rings? I don't know. Well, the whole field of toes is very interesting. Disgusting. Disgusting. Kelly's a big fan. But I don't know. I mean, my answer I have right now I don't think is the answer people are looking for.

It's what I'm looking for. I feel like because it's not an accessory. I feel like it would be like a personality trait of just being like. We'll comment. You can kind of tell, I don't know, when someone has good energy. But that means nothing. So just let's move on. I got nothing.

What about high socks? I got nothing for that. High socks with what else? I'd say generally no. All right. No? i got what about high socks i got nothing for that high socks with what else i'd say generally no all right no so not but like if they're out and about no but like there are times when that could be interest like good as well let's say high socks over leggings you're just like this is weird yeah i think that's kind of weird but not like again like, I don't feel too strongly, but what I envision in my head is kind of weird there, yeah. So, I think the high socks thing is absolutely a thing, first of all. And I won't go, I won't waste another syllable on that, as far as Bruce would say.

The personality piece, I think that, honestly, somebody who can fuck around with you is a giant turn on. Like, that is one of those, what do you call it, like an X factor kind of a thing. Yeah, it shows interest, give and take. Exactly. It hits on every. Yes, it hits on a different level. Like, I don't really, if you aren't able to give me that back and forth and you have a nipple piercing, I don't give a shit. You know what I mean?

Like, it is, like. I gave you both, baby. Don't worry. My girl got it all. But, you know, that's kind of what I'm talking about. Like, you got to be able to give it back and forth. Like, let's say that you have perfect teeth, you've got perfect eyes, you've got everything, and you're not able to give me a little bit of back and forth when I'm fucking around with you.

That matters more. If she has perfect teeth, which I would say I've never seen fully perfect teeth, I would drop anything and do anything to make that happen. Can we talk about Charlie's weird thing with teeth? That's exactly what I was about to go into. I would drop anything and do anything to make that happen. Can we talk about Charlie's weird thing with teeth? That's exactly what I was about to go into. Thank you, Sammy. Charlie is a man who appreciates teeth.

Charlie appreciates teeth more than, I think, any person that I've ever met. And I don't think it's a thing that is anything that you should feel anything but pride towards. It's something that I love about you. You absolutely go in and you say, teeth matter to me. Yeah, they do. They matter to me in my own life and in a lot of other ways. Well, and you love a girl who has a perfect smile. Or at least a smile that brightens up a room. You know what I mean?

Or at least one that doesn't dim it. Well, exactly. Yeah. Yeah. And that kind of girl, you don't let go of. Plain and simple. Wow, that was incredibly awkward. Average?

Not mine. Paying energy. Yeah. Any dentist recommendations? And here we are, paying energy. I do have a dentist recommendation. ADT Dental in Minneapolis, Minnesota. They do great work.

They're very friendly. And no one there believes in the Hox virus, so you don't have to wear a mask. Emergency Dental Milwaukee. Definitely top notch. Took my tooth out that was growing into my cheek recently wow wisdom tooth growing sideways that's terrible took another try and removed the pain talked about this before but i thought my cat was legit staring at me and i saw a tweet that cats could be alien spies and i legit contemplated it during that time. I thought I was an actual wizard until I was 18 years old.

Could perform magic. Here we go. Legit wizard. All right, let's get into this. Potions? Spells? Well, my specialty. Black magic. Was always defense against the dark arts.

I viewed myself as, I mean, everyone's a hero on their own story, but you need to be well equipped to actually commit to that in real life. You were like a Minnesotan Harry Potter. Yeah. With red hair, red pubes. Let's cut that um but yeah no i'm familiar with incantations polyjuice potions spells of various degrees of severity yes i don't even know what to say yeah um we can move to the next topic we can move to the next

unless there are specific magic related questions you're curious about i wouldn't even know where to start and i think adam's gonna ask something that may not make sense no it'll make perfect sense how do you do your magic trick how do you do it magic trick was different from the magic i was working on in my in my youth um this was more of a traditional card trick. But generally how it works, someone will draw a card, they will replace it into the deck, they will shuffle the deck, and then the most important, the crux of the trick comes

I spread the deck, I move my fingers slowly across the deck, the subject thinks of the card that they have drawn and I will pull from their mind the card. Michael can attest I'm good for 25% hit card. Michael can attest I'm good for a 25% hit rate. I can usually get suit number close. You have done it to everyone but me this weekend.

Weird. Weird energy. It's really odd. So like a lot of people out there in America listening, so I'm not perfect. I've made there in America listening. So I'm not perfect. I I've made mistakes in my life. I have regrets and not every time can it be perfect. Plus, plus you you guard your mental pretty closely.

It's hard. I'm a very guarded human being. It's difficult to pull. And and at the time when I was getting yours wrong, there's a lot of people in the room. And that affects kind of singling out a brave wavelength and chuck was in the corner thinking of three hearts the whole time too just to fuck with me yeah but i mean it was a difficult trick and i i stand by my tattoo what clock your tattoo clock is is wrong twice a day that's well that's right that's a broken clock is wrong twice a day no no no no just a regular clock just twice broken clock right twice a day no no no when it comes to magic and

chuck yeah it's wrong twice a day that's correct and well yeah you should text each other like you're in fucking middle school do you want me to talk into the microphone? Adam's on TikTok. No, I'd like you to talk into the back of your chair right now so no one can hear you. I said I'm tired. Shut up, Adam. That's all. I wasn't talking shit. Not about my boys.

Not about the pros. You my bro, too. No, we can wrap this up here soon. This has gone pretty well. We've done a total of, do you know what the last one was? Oh, I have a question. I have a question. I like questions.

And this might hit, I don't know who it's going to hit to. Do you think you're fully over your first love? Oh, God, God. Did you listen to the conversation us three had in the basement? No. That didn't come up. I can answer for two of us. Oh, no.

I can't, actually. I don't remember. I would say. I don't remember anything. The reason I bring it up is I saw a meme that was like, no one ever gets over their first love, whatever, when you guys were doing your other one so i'm curious if if if getting over means like just generally there's no negativity if there's no negativity like really going either way like i don't i don't think it's someone that i never like check in with or something like they're not

like totally cut out but like i mean doesn't wildly like swing my emotions one way or another like as it would when you know got my heart broke but uh but yeah no i think i'd say generally pretty well over it not that it's you know great i don't know what the like it depends on what it means. Because I think the whole thing with your first love, and if you ever get over it, I think, like, your first love, if that's truly what love is outside of, like, your family sense of, like, what love means, like, romantic love. If love is what's defined by your experience with one person, I don't think that, I think any time you fall in love after that,

you will be reminded of the first time that you felt that and be inclined to compare it in ways or yeah it's definitely comparison i don't think it's a bad thing to like i think it's a bad thing if you fall in love and then are like i never want to think about that again yeah i think it's good to view it as a guideline like hey this is a standard of what i need to feel bare minimum again. In that retrospect, fuck no. I'm not even close. Yeah, there's... To be completely honest, no is my answer.

Here's my thought. Everybody listen up. Wow. I think the answer is yes you absolutely can be over your first love like the question is are you i am i i think that it's as simple i thought the question i don't have to say that at all here's here's the actual thought on it i think that you don't necessarily wow necessarily know what love is at that point is number one that's absolutely my first point number two uh you don't know what love can be and those are my two main points i was gonna piggyback off that one because i think a huge thing at least for me personally, I fell in love in eighth grade until freshman year of high school.

And it's like that's your first experience feeling that feeling that like not necessarily is like something you're going to hold on to forever because you don't know yourself well enough yet in a relationship. Okay, let's then let's get more. But yes, I'm over my first love. enough yet in a relationship. Okay, let's get more specific. But yes, I'm over my first love. It was in eighth grade. Let's get more specific. Let's get more specific with this because if we're going like legitimate sense. Crackhead Mary got some boys over? She's about to get a train wreck.

She's about to get a train wreck. Okay, so first love eighth grade i would venture to say doesn't fucking count it it does it does first time feeling that there's that thing where like people yeah feeling that feeling but i think a better question be how about are you over you could just say the second where you recognize the feeling instead of like knowing what you're feeling rather than like i'm actually just obsessed with this person in eighth grade yeah i get what you're saying so like people say there you have three loves in your life you have your first love your second one which is going to be your hardest and the third one that's like holy shit like whatever so like are you over your

lesson or have you had your lesson yet are you asking me specifically i guess i'm asking the group which is kind of how i answered it but i don't know i think how adam answered it i don't know about everyone else i didn't like it i don't know i guess uh if you go based off of the first second third love kind of thing there's a different viewpoint of it i think that cracking a cold one yeah crack one baby no i i just think that a lot of people's first loves are in high school. You think that you're like, it's not even necessarily love. Like, have you ever been obsessed with a person in high school where you're like, damn, I'm like crazy over into this person. And like, I'm not over them kind of a thing.

Like, you don't even know it's love at the time. I think there's a lot of the first love that you really experience. Exactly. Yeah. And then you run into your second love and then you run into your third love that's actually the thing that's like healing you and helping you and like i don't know that's that's a personal objectification of that but i think uh i think at the end of the, the main point of it all is that every situation, you don't really know what it is when you're in it. And while you're in it, it feels like it's the most real thing.

That's one thing that I always think about and that has been expressed in real life is that – sorry about that with the microphone, big boys. sorry about that with the microphone big boys uh you can get to a point with getting into relationships where you don't really understand like what it is and to get caught up in it and then when you get out of it you're like what was this that's the real idea of it frankly yeah but i guess my question when we're if if the frame of the question to bring it back to the question is first second third whichever it is like are you over it is you say in the moment you don't know what it is in retrospect i think that implies that you can classify it better um i mean with so you said earlier that you think you're over your first one. Do you think, as we reframe the question, is that the same person? Is that the same person?

And, I mean, in retrospect, do you feel the same way as your first answer? Sorry, what do you mean by that? I mean, so do you stay on the same person so after we were saying so i know you didn't give an eighth grade answer i imagine the person that you said is not eighth grade person same person same answer all the way after adding a few caveats to the question i i still would like to get a little clarification yeah i'm still lost on that too charlie i'm saying we have added some elements to this question well i mean i guess fuck it i actually i mean i think your answer to that's gonna be yes i think i think knowing him his

answer is gonna be yes i think the ultimate question is like we started with a very basic form of the question added a few more qualifications to it would that change your answers basically what are you saying yeah in retrospect to the eighth grader or the one afterwards because it would change your answer because you would have a different person yeah that's what i'm trying you're saying first and then the same person is it the same feeling yeah i mean oh okay so you're saying if and then is it the same person is it the same feeling yeah oh okay so you're saying if i redefine what my first second third is basically i would say that you in in order this is the way i would describe it anytime that you feel like you're in love i think that you disqualify the person before you as being like fully in love because that's kind of part of it. With that person?

The earlier person? Yes. Because if you were to be still in love with your first or second, then are you really out of love? I think you level up each time. I don't know. I've dated a lot of people and I've fallen in love, i would say with looking back on it probably three people total and like every single time that i've fallen in love with someone else it's been better than the second one prior i agree with that and i think that it it's hard to put love into three people

like i know that's not like something that's no i think to sammy's point i think there's something to be said of like if you're truly in love I think that is a beautiful thing but it also teaches you so much about yourself and if two people are truly in love and then they break up like I think you can be in love and just realize that it's not the right time with someone and like that doesn't mean that you aren't in love

anymore it's just like you have to live your own life too and like then you learn things about the first relationship or the second relationship or the third or whatever. And that makes you a better person because the next person that you find, you'll know the things that you didn't know about yourself with the person that you thought was like, yeah,

I think that the general, like you have three in your life is a very bare bones kind of example to put it. Like, I think you have one, I think one and three are always going to be one person two is anywhere is everyone in between kind of thing like two are your lessons basically i would put it i think when people put two as a specific person is like yeah who's the last one that like

hey fuck me up enough that this whatever happens next kind of thing like i know what the fuck i want rather than like two is usually experiment is kind of where like i know what the fuck i want rather than like two is usually experiment is kind of where i was going with that so i guess maybe which i think is kind of in line with what chuck's saying here is i one thing i would disagree with and what you just said is like i don't necessarily think being in a relationship or like having something going on with someone else makes me discredit something i felt to someone else although you can you can experience love like in different ways as well and like that can expand but to me I it doesn't make me like I guess what I've learned since the first time that I've like felt that I'm in love with someone has not tempered I guess how

I viewed what that was which I did think it was like a good thing I still do wait just to clarify in my head like you're saying that you didn't lose the love specifically that you had with that one person yeah just because you leveled up with another yes and I guess like level up is would be one way to put it to me I just think it's different with each person but um and like probably gets better each time but like i wasn't saying it doesn't to me it doesn't experiencing it a different way does not make me discredit like what i felt for someone oh yeah i wasn't saying like going on to the next person makes what you have before like null and void kind of thing yeah the way i guess i view it and you can disagree

with this too is like you now have i think with each person your level of expectation of what you need to feel for this to be a real thing increases so like like i said it's your lesson so like hey this and this is a a red flag or I draw the line here. I'm not going to do this kind of thing again. Trial and error. Yeah, it's trial and error. I'm not saying what you had before with anyone else was terrible or you view it as completely different.

You just kind of view it as like a guideline. Or like a lot of errors. Yeah, a lot of errors. And, Kuski, I think one thing to like what you said too is i wouldn't necessarily frame it as like every time you level up or whatever the term like every time you get into something new i wouldn't say that what you need increases yeah it just like you don't need more and more every time but you just become more clear of what it is that is important to you when you're defining what love is for you which is different for everyone yeah

when i think that just guides my level up theory and what you're saying is you're defining what love is for you which is different for everyone yeah when i think that just guides my level up theory and what you're saying is you figure out what you want more it doesn't mean that the person that you had that other love with isn't able to fulfill that right which is what i think you're arguing like it's not necessarily that like the person needs to change but like your actual involvement with them needs to change because there's a reason that it was your first or second love or whatever you want to call it and it's not you're like in this scenario of like this is from an Anderson Paak song basically too which is what we're basing it's like you have your first second second, third love. You have the three main loves of your life, you know?

That's not a Pac song, by the way. Is this from a Pac song? I'm pretty sure this is like a psychology thing. No, it's a psychology thing that he probably used in the song. Sorry, I just want to clarify. You're right about that. You're right about that. It is.

That is the right description of it. But that's where I'm sure you're basing it off of, too. But, I mean, the idea of it is essentially like it doesn't need to be three separate people that fulfill that, but that doesn't discredit the idea that we're talking about. Yeah, no, as we were saying, I feel like one and three, I feel like, is the beginning and end, and two is everything in between yep yeah and i mean i don't know the the idea of this the you reach that first love of like this is what this is it's it's the first time you feel it it's the first time that you like recognize that it's not even recognizing necessarily like sometimes you look back and you're like well that was like more intense than anybody else that i've ever like experienced it with

like it might be just be that i the way i if i were to categorize it like i wouldn't categorize that i've even had like three loves necessarily, to really get into it, for me, personally, but I would say there's one person that I've, like, liked a lot more than anyone else, and that would be my, like, first love, technically, kind of a thing, yeah, the other two, it's, like, you have one that you really learn from, and, like, figure out what you want, and then the third is, like, the one that you're, like, hey, out what you want and then the third is like the one that you're like hey this is it you know like that's that's how i would describe it real quick did you see the lines right there before they get tall where i'm talking that's you monotone not like a car key starting the car no it's just like this

but that's you but you're wrapping this up so are you over him or not i think we kind of got over like general consensus the lesson no first one fuck yeah i know it's hard to say. I would say this. I'm in lesson phase. First one, 100%. I think get over it instantly has a negative connotation. Sorry. Rephrase it if you want.

No, no. I just think will I ever forget the first time I was in love and what I loved about it? Probably not. Hell no. You shouldn't. You shouldn't. You shouldn't. And I guess everyone's, you know, love doesn't, isn't always good for people. Like there's some people who fall in love, but there's a lot wrong.

And so they don't like, that's a different issue too. But I think like getting over your first love, I don't personally believe is like possible in a lot of ways. Like I think you'll always remember like the lessons that you learned when you were like for the first time, like felt like you'll always remember like the lessons that you learned when you were like for the first time like felt like you were i think the best way that has helped me is instead of viewing it as in order to get to the next one you have to be completely over the one before i think in my head at least for me could be different for other people, I think you should just accept the fact that you always will love that person and it's easier to,

you have to accept it because it's not going to just change that you don't or you didn't. And because if you have the mindset that I can't love another person or I can't be romantically involved with another person until I'm completely over them,

it's not going to happen. Just accept the fact that you always will you want the best for them and then move on like if it never happens again that you felt better some people aren't meant for it but keep an open mind realize you always have love for other people you just might find a deeper love for someone else i feel like that's kind of need to worry like where a lot of people need to be i think just a big thing like i guess where my kind of thing is it's like when are you think you like when do you think you're ready to move on to the next relationship from a previous one the readiness is a different yeah a whole different and i guess like in my eyes when i know that I'm over someone if you want to say it is when I stop thinking about them like they're not brought up in my mind that much like the lessons are always

going to be there they're going to carry with you because if you didn't experience them then you're never really truly growing even in a relationship or yourself so I think the over part in my eyes is just you don't think about them that much which i like that i like that too i also like the uh and this is honestly like i saw this in a south park episode the credibility is out the window but like and i feel like if anyone who watches will know what i'm talking about and it circulates the internet every once in a while but there's a a video of someone who like i don't watch it very often um and so i don't know the characters but someone who like just got dumped and they're

like his friends are like trying to get him out and he's like but why why don't you want to go with this he said basically the fact that i'm allowed to feel this sad meant i felt that good at some point yes is like thinking of it that way it's like oh it's kind of beautiful that i'm allowed to feel this sad is pretty fucking cool we didn't experience that do i not am i gonna like i'm not gonna put it like yo that sadness fucking sucks 100 but it is kind of cool knowing that you can get to that point and hopefully you can't get back if we didn't have it we wouldn't know what happened yeah you need the good with the bad there will if we always had good life would be fucking boring but does breaking up fucking suck yeah

obviously we're stealing the world obviously one of them sorry well actually extreme there's a lot of other things actually not always sometimes breaking up is kind of fucking relieving yes there is a size and that's usually with those that aren't loves it's just like hey i was bored kind of thing yeah i had a relationship in beginning of high school dated this girl for a month broke up and my mom i was like running around chasing my brothers and my mom stopped me and she goes did you break up with so-and-so i was like yeah it literally happened 20 minutes earlier she goes i can tell you're happy my dad did the same shit your energy changes it's the craziest shit you're attached to someone that brings you down

it's a good thing to get them out of there It's a good thing to get them out of there. Breach. And this is an ad for Bang Energy again. Can we circle back to an important topic? Sponsored by therapy. Yeah, we can wrap this up. Does anyone have any final words? This has been a pretty good first episode.

I like this. This was really stupid weird and then got stupid deep for a while. It was a good ending question. Unless anyone has anything else. Good? Good? stupid weird and then got stupid deep for a while that was a good ending question unless anyone was anything else good good sorry to all the men out there that i broke your heart hope you're doing okay i'm doing fucking great um do you guys want to apologize to any girls that you think you might have broken their hearts no broken their hearts no there's some passion behind that jesus all right yeah we'll end this

thank you all of you sammy thank you for joining for this last one i know you uh missed out on the finale of the other show but i mean that shows like beginnings i don't like that show is dead in the air now see you so. So, yes. Thank you. And as our final piece, here is a reminder to not purchase Carigold Irish imported butter. It's poison. It's filled with lead. They are not grass-fed, as they claim. Please buy Land O'Lakes butter.

Thank you. Hartwell, what do you want to plug? I'd love to plug Land O'Lakes butter. Yes. Do you have anything coming out, though, work-wise? You're forcing my hand, aren't you? I am forcing your hand. If three people listen to this and you get three more people to watch it.

If three people listen to two hours of this, I hope that's the case. The only two-hour episode we have, actually, that's the case might one of the only two hour episode we have actually is probably in the top eight of views you should talk talk to kuski's mom at this point because she's the only one that's left here listening yeah probably thanks for creating such a beautiful soul mrs kuski i'm not talking p-holes i'm not talking i'm cutting to the chase thank you anything adam i love my girlfriend I'm not talking pee holes. I'm cutting to the chase. Thank you. Anything, Adam?

I love my girlfriend. I love my girlfriend. I think everyone heard that, Sammy. I love my girlfriend. I wanted to keep whispering. We're trying to end this. You know what? I'd like to give a last Shout out to Bang Energy

We finished this can It tastes like absolute dog shit But wow I am wired It tastes like a candy apple sucker Sammy anything else That's it Alright thank you again to all four of you Boys thank you for having me for New Years

Anytime Mike And uh maybe I'll be back up here soon Fuck yeah Again, to all four of you. Boys, thank you for having me for New Year's. Anytime, Mike. And maybe I'll be back up here soon. Fuck yeah. Let me know when you move out. Maybe I'll sleep on this couch a little more. Yeah. All right, we'll end it. Thank you.

Thank you.