Snooki the Paranormal Rookie
00:00Hello friends. My name is Day Miller.And I'm Nile Spain and we are your fuck buddies.We are a sex and tating advice show. Where we take your sticky, sexy situations and turn them into the sexy sticky situations.We find them. We bring them. We answer them. From you, from the internet, from whoever.It's October. What's October mean, Dane?It's spooky. It's fall. Pumpkin spice.And when you think of those three things, who comes to mind?White women? And which white woman in particular?
00:45Basic. Which basic white woman in particular?That's right. Snooky. Oh, yeah. I mean, orange. Scary. Well, scary has powers. Does Snooki have powers? Am I missing?Snooky power lore? You didn't know that Snooki had powers? I didn't. Sorry, abilities. Like, however you want to phrase it, like, you know, she herself has said both. So I think they're both okay. You'll know about this. You'll know about Snoke. Like, come on. When you think Snooki, you think Halloween. You think spooky. You think powers, right?So can I be honest with you? I know Snooki by name. And that's about.it. I know she was on.You know what, Dane? This is exactly what happened to me because I wanted to bring this to theepisode. I'm right before we logged on. I had to go, Snooky? Where's Snooky from? And I believe it'sJersey Shore. Jersey Shore. It's Jersey Shore. I was like Miami. What's the? We all know
01:34Snooki for some reason, even if you've never watched the show, even if you don't know much aboutSnucky, right? She was very, she was very mocked. Like, you couldn't watch an S&L or a sketchcomedy show that didn't have a snooky impression or proxy.Yeah.And you might be like, well, Nile, I'm a little confused as to why you're bringing snuckie upbecause it's been a long time.And the relevance was low at best, even in the peak.But Dane, you forgot her powers and her deep ties to the supernatural.
02:04And I am, of course, talking about Snooky paranormal Rucky.So hold on.Before we get into this, are you going to explain who Snooky is?Because I do feel like there's a number of our audience who,I would say are in their 20s who don't know what Jersey Shore or Snook is.I kind of feel like everybody knows.And I don't know that I can, it was a reality TV show.Thank you.
02:25You say this, but I work with a lot of 19 and like 21 and 22 year olds right now.And I will make references to things that like I think everyone should know things likeGhostbusters.And they will not know what I'm talking about.Otherwise known as Snookie.She was a member of like Jersey Shore, which was a reality TV show.show about just like people living and it was I would say a turning point for us as a cultureas a society I think it was one of the big like reality TV shows that really paved the way for
02:56so much trash um I don't really know how to describe it but instead of a restaurant it's a beachapartment yeah an apartment building on a beach they like gyms and tanning and laundry and laundrygtel baby and it's insane that having never watched the show I do know that and snooky wasjust one of them. And now Snooki isSnooky Paranormal Rookie. The brandnew show on Crave, where sheclaims she has powers and she goes into hauntedhouses, it talks to ghosts.
03:24Now, when you say she has powers,can you go into the powers?I believe she claims foresight.She claims foresight. Okay.She says she,to paraphrase, she's like,I meditated on the plane. And then she goes,you know I meditate. And then she says, and I wrote
03:41down this house, home ofsecrecy and lies. And she's like,and was I right? Was I right? Because the ghost is like lies secrecy. And she's like, boom, I did it.Of course, we didn't hear that prior to the ghost saying these things. And we never saw that she wrote it down,but that's fine. And it's really funny because Snooky is paired up with a bunch of like established like ghosthunters. And the ghost hunter guy will be like, did you hear that? Did you hear that? It's a death.Oh, they're up there. And instead of either buying in or not buying in,Snooki just keeps me like, I can I get my ears check? Like, I didn't hear anything. Fuck, I didn't hear
04:14that and like seems genuinely worried about her own hearing less so than either disbelieving or in factbelieving this man and just being like fuck why can't i hear any of this and it sucks to be anestablished ghost hunter and have someone essentially saying you're lying like not not intentionally rightlike i don't think snooky is there to bust these ghost busters but it is funny to be like you knowlike if you and i had a grift of being like yeah oh we go into places wow and we wow why would you saythat. We seek out the paranormal and then we're like, oh no, did you see the orbs? And someone's like,no, that wasn't there. It's like, well, the best thing is. The best thing is it like goes both waysbecause like Snooky will just be like, oh yeah, like I sensed this thing or I heard this thing or
04:59like I had a vision of this thing. And you can tell the ghost hunter hates that she's saying thisand doesn't believe her. But like he can't be like, really that doesn't exist. So he has to be like,yeah. Yeah, because it's not great, man. It's not Greg paranormal.rookie. It's Snooky.She is the vehicle and he's just along for the ride so he can't say shit.But like why? Where did this come from? Who was like, you know what we need a vaguely importantat best reality TV star from forever ago in a not related at all field?I just do a ghost hunting show on Crave. Do you think Snooky paranormal rookie came first? Because that's such
05:42fucking great title that they were like, well, we got to do it now.I also do like that she admits she's a rookie.Like she's not saying that she's good at it.Oh, her powers, they just came to her.Like she hasn't cultivated them.She's working on.I mean, look, I'm going to guess that she's an executive producer on this show.I'm assuming some of that Jersey Shore money is getting funneled into this venture.
06:03Either that or there is someone who is like, ah, fuck, we have a, we have a half hour block that we need to fill.and we need someone who is so desperate that they will cling to any job.She's the executive producer.Shocking.Hey.You nailed it.What?Okay, that makes sense, I guess.
06:22Yeah.It is, it is fucking hilarious and it's not good.It's not good.Don't, don't mistake my joy for it being a good show.I thought you were going to say, so I've been seeing clips of, it's like a ghost hunting show,but all the ghost trumpers are quite.quite gay. So it's like a gay ghost hunting. Yeah. And I was really hoping that like that was actually a snooky vehicle. And I, they just cut Snooki out of it. And I was like, that's incredible. If Snooky is kind of being like a queer, queer, you know, employer and bringing these gay ghost hunters thing. Because I imagine it's probably pretty tough to be a gay ghost hunting has been typically a straight kind of venture. Yeah. Straight white venture, really. Let's be fair. Yeah. And I'm glad it's we're seeing a diversifying. Because like a lot of the ghosts don't want to talk to a straight white person.person, actually, ghosts probably really would.
07:11I was going to say, that's where I was comingfrom as like, I imaginea lot of ghosts probably harborsome pretty maliceenergy towardsthe queer community, just becauseof the nature of their upbringing, you know,just because the quality
07:28of the time. That's gay ghost erasure.That's true. Maybe there's a gay ghost who wouldbe very excited to finallyconnect with someone who understands theirplight. Anyway, I just thought we'd talkabout that. Another thing we didn't talk about,is the Willy Wonka reality TV show.Have you put your eyes on that day?
07:45I haven't.Is it out?It is out, yes.Yeah, no, I don't.So they did get an AI version of Gene Wilder to voice the thing, which like, obviously, I don't agree with.And I think is disgusting.But the best part of it is it's so bad.It's so bad.
08:03Like, it doesn't sound anything like them.And it also just, it's like, yeah, go, dude.thing. Yeah. Now it's time for this. Like there's, there's no energy. It's like, you know,the like, which is wild. Because, give us nothing. That's, that's it. Every time I hear it, it's the mostokay. Yeah. And Willy Wonka is a, is a, is a, is a whimsical man. Yeah. Right. Like,he's Willie Wonka. You can't say that without whimsy. Literally any, I would be a better voice.Think about any sort of delivery. Also, like, look, you're telling me that in the age of TikTok,in the age of being able to extend your reach out to the edges of the world,
08:44you can't find someone who can do a Gene Wilder impression.So you know what I would do?Because I'm a smart, smart man.You say, hey, it's a Gene Wilder impersonation contest in Central Park.Like all the fucking ones of those that have gone viral.People show up.People do their thing.Then you rip your fucking wig off.
09:04And, oh, you're Mr. Netflix.And you did this as a promotional stud.and you want to hire the person that won. Boom.Yeah, easy.Free promo, everyone knows fun.And even if you don't want to worry about the permits and the legalities, just do it on TikTok.Netflix don't care, but permits and legalities?They killed people on Beast games.
09:21Actually, was that Amazon?That was Amazon, I think.Well, this is their chance to kill people.They're like, hey, if Amazon's doing it, we're going to get a wonka fucking murder machine going.Do you think, because we did a question early on about someone who, their sexual awakening as a young child waswatching the like the blueberry scene and then they grew up and like do you think when they sawthe reality TV show they were like oh or do you think maybe they're one of the people in itwell so this is a challenging thought that you've brought up to me now because you're implying
09:52that either a they're going to inflate these people to unsafe sizes or that I mean look now thatI'm thinking about it probably would be pretty easy you just wear one of those like sumo suitsand the challenges is like as no they would do it to your organs till they burst becauseit's Netflix.Yeah.We're like a couple years out from,from something that's like,look.
10:11Running man.Yeah.Yeah.Yeah.A couple of years,maybe 12.I mean,we got the Beast games.
10:16That's pretty much.That was it.That was like,oops.They're also making Squid game.Yeah.Like, right?They just don't kill the people in the game show.
10:24That's what you can.No.Halfway through the show,people just start becoming AI.You're like,I don't think that guy's real anymore.What happened?I mean,
10:31I also think,I believe the Squid Game one was almost akin to torture when they were like,oh,the studio was freezing and because we they weren't getting the shots we had to like do the gameslonger so they're like you know they're like red go the stop go one with like the doll apparentlythey were making people hold those positions longer than what you see and that the game is goingbecause they need to get shots and go and get like closeups and stuff and I was like that just seemslike bad television making at that point like why do you not just have a bunch of cameras rolling
11:03like at once.Yeah.But yeah,apparently the,the squid game thing was,was akin to the Mr.Beast,terrible shit show.
11:10Unsurprised,12 years out from murder on TV.Now,speaking of terrible shit show,I have some sex news and a PSA.Okay.Is it about hierarchy?That's right.
11:19It's not.It's about sexually transmitted diarrhea.Yeah.I heard about thisliterally right before I logged on.Yep.So,there is a current bacteria
11:28known as Stegelum,or Shigella.Shigella.Which causes...Which causes chagalosis.Which is stomach cramps.Severe diarrhea, sometimes bloody.And it lasts for once, two weeks.
11:46And it's becoming so prevalent.There's so many cases of it that it's now also starting to reject medication.So you just kind of have to...They say that within a week or two, it clears up on its own.So you just get your own private Wonka Chocolate River.That's a week or two of...of real, real bad times.That sucks.
12:07That's too long for diarrhea.Yeah.It seems like America specifically is really trying to push a diarrhea agenda between their lettuceand now they're sex.So it's transmitted.I think it is just when you stop doing any safety things that you just kind of like yoloall your safety procedure.I think diarrhea is just kind of the first one because that's, there's nothing specific
12:32about diarrhea.It's just body being like, ah, yeah, we need to purge.Yeah, so that's just where our bodies are now reflecting our mental state of,ah, every time we look at America.So it's traditionally spread through contaminated food, water surfaces,but it can also be spread during sexual activity involving exposure to tiny amounts of infected fecal material.So a lot of men are getting it, but it's also, you know, eating ass is now a dangerous,now a dangerous endeavor.
13:02We finally got into the mainstream.Yeah.And now it's causing a bad stream.Nice.So this is just my way of saying out there that...You've heard Dane.He says, don't eat ass.Maybe just relax on the ass eating.
13:16Or make sure you're not having diarrhea.I don't know.I mean, here's the thing.I think that if you are having any sort of butt-related sexual activity,while you are under the effects of diarrhea, you're an insane person.You're a crazy person.Maybe it's people that don't know they yet have this thing.I don't know.
13:35So it does say that sometimes the infection can linger for one to two weeks after symptoms have disappeared.So it is, it's kind of like sneaking around.So it's like you think you're in the clear and then you have sex and then you've passed it on.So that's just my thing.I just want to let people know about it.That's your thing?Yeah, I'm kind of making it my new brand, my new persona.Shigellum.
13:58Yeah.What a wonderful world we live.You ready?Yeah.To speak about, found out the girl I'm seeing and her friends had a nickname for me.Is it weird that she has a designated date bar?Girl I'm dating wants me to pretend to be her ex around her grandmother.Reconnected with a high school friend, date or casual.
14:14All right, this is my puzzled handle.Found out the girl I'm seeing and her friends had a nickname for me before they knew my name.I'm 29 male.She's 27 female.We've been seeing each other for about five weeks.We've had six dates and recently agreed to focus on each other.She invited me to her friend's birthday this weekend.One of her friends looked at me and said, oh, you're Sunday guy.
14:31And then immediately looked like she shouldn't have said it.She explained that early on, her friends called me Sunday guy because most of our dates happened on Sundays.I asked her about later.She said it was just a nickname they came up with after our second date.But now I'm wondering, is there a Monday guy?A Friday guy?I know we weren't exclusive and she could date whoever we wanted.But what bothers me is finding out I had a label in the group chat.
14:52Made me feel like I was one of several guys being compared.She thinks I'm reading too much into it.Would you ask more about it or leave it alone?leave it alone. Just please leave it alone.But,don't you get it? Like a reallyinnocent thing happened and hewants to fucking lose his mind about it.
15:09This is evidencethat this guy has no friends who are women,right? Because... Or men.Like, I have friends who, like,I didn't know people you were dating's namefor like forever. Yeah, there was a spooky librarianfor a very long time that you...Yeah. You just referred to them a spooky librarian
15:25because... Yeah, yeah. Peoplerefer to like people like acrobats.girl was one. Like, it's just easier and it's more like when you're like a third party to what'sgoing on. It's so much easier to remember something nicknamey than to be like Jeff. Jeff is nothing.Jeff isn't evocative. Jeff isn't funny. Jeff isn't memorable. No offense, Jeff. Sunday,it helps. It helps friends remember who you're talking about, especially if you are as you as youmentioned, especially if she is seeing other people. It's way easier to be like, I don't, I've never met Markand Jeff and Steve.
15:59So in my head, those are all just guys.Those are just all amorphous guys.But at least Sunday guy, I know who Sunday guy is.It's the guy you see on Sundays.And the thing is, you see each other on Sundays.So the name is explained.If you were like Sunday guy and then there was no explanation or something else,like you were fifth guy, that would be kind of weird.
16:19But like, yeah.You saw each other on Sundays.So your backup.Like, it's not.Oh, it's third string.Yeah.Yeah, you imagine like it's almost cute where they're probably like, oh, you want to hang out?It's like, oh, I have a date. Oh, you're with Sunday guy. Like, you just also, you can't expect your partner's friends, especially someone you're not like actually dating, dating. You can't expect their friends to be invested in you at all.
16:44Like, I couldn't care less about who someone is casually seeing sometimes one time, a one night stand. Like, I don't care. If I invested that much energy, like when we were single, if we were investing that much energy in the people that we were.we were seeing. It would be exhausting. Our brain, our brains would explode. And I'm not being like,we were fucking everyone. But it just, I had my own things going on. And I wouldn't expect anyoneto remember the people that I was sleeping with or hooking up with. Yeah, until it becomes,you're not involved in it. Yeah. Until it becomes pertinent until it's like, oh, this person is going tobe a part of my life and therefore yours, because I'm bringing them around. It's kind of a seriousthing. I really like them. Like, that's when it becomes important. And up untilthat point, the nickname, totally fine.
17:28And hey, it could have been infinitely worse.It could have been way worse.Or like shithead or like, you know,surety or.Yeah, like any could have been anything.This is the most innocuous and easily explainable thing and doesn't assume thatthere's a Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday guy.And if there were, that means you beat six dudes.
17:50Good job.Yeah, you ended up the week and you won.Yeah, you're Mr.You're Mr. Weekwide.Yeah.It's the thing that I'm getting really tired with to add to my list of things that dudes do.I mean, I don't think this is dude exclusive.We see it a lot everywhere.
18:07Is the, I know that we weren't exclusive.But it does bother me.Shut the fuck up.You either know that you're not exclusive.So therefore, it shouldn't bother you.Or look, it can bother.Right.We're humans.
18:20Sometimes jealousy creeps up.But shut the fuck up about it.Like, really.I think you're saying I know it shouldn't be bothered about it.But I am.Yeah, like, unless someone is weaponizing the fact that they are seeing other people against you,pitting you against each other or purposely trying to make you jealous or feel insecure.Yeah, that sucks and that's shitty.
18:40And I feel that that that's a different story.But just dating someone casually, knowing that you aren't exclusive.And then finally, if you become cognizant of the existence of the possibility that they were seeing someone else,and that drives you into a fucking despair.And you need to, and I say this with all the love in the world, shut the fuck up.Get over it.The thing is, you don't even know anything.You're just making it up.
19:03Yeah.You are implying that because your nickname is one of seven in a string, that there is seven other people.But as now said, no.It doesn't immediately make that true because I would hope.If they said Sunday evening guy, does that mean there's 14 people?Yeah.I would hope that her friends are a little more creative.just naming the people that she dates on the days that she dates them.
19:29I also assume that no one else is this.Desiment.It's only Sunday.Yeah.The odds of her being able to find a guy who's only going to see her on Mondays and a guy that's onlygoing to see her on Tuesday.Also, how does she maintain these wonderful friendships if she's seeing a guy every dayof the week?
19:45And here, here's what you really need to do.You need to congratulate this woman on repeatedly having a perfect week.If she is having sex or dating, a different person.day. That's, that's a royal flush every week. That's perfect. This woman's out of control in the bestway. And she's choosing and she's like, hey, she's like, hey, she gave that up for you. She gavea beautiful man. I have a beautiful man. And instead, I'm going to take this pair of twos.I'm going to trade it in for Jeff. Damn. Don't, don't be a joker.They if you ruin this. If you ruin this relationship, you'll be at home jacking off by
20:21yourself, King. Don't get over this queen. You can. You canbe her ace in the hole.Oh.Just don't, hey, just don't eat her ace hole because you might get severe STD diarrhea.Yeah, if Dane, if boy number seven, Mr. Sunday, eight, nine, I don't know.Eight, nine.Just, yeah, we ate to see you burn this relationship to the ground for no reason.Please, come on.
20:44Just fucking cop on.You know you need to.You just want us to tell you.Yeah.Or you want to hear that, like, if she's, if she's seeing other people, then she doesn'treally care.Shut the fuck up.Shut the fuck.
20:55This is what pisses me off.But it's always like every single fucking like Reddit comment thread is always the worst take imaginable.And it's all the same people who are like dating is the worst.Dating is so hard.Dating is terrible.Why is it so hard to date now?It's because you're making it bad, you dumb ass.Like you can't enter into a contract of, hey, we're not exclusive.
21:18We're going to see other people.And then the second that is true, be like, I know I shouldn't be mad.Possibly true.Shut.Yeah.I hit me.So this is, this, this was deleted, but I'm going to paraphrase it because it's, it's a prettysimple concept.
21:32So a dude, uh, was going on a date with a woman and she brought him to a bar.And then she was like, hey, this is like my first date bar.Uh, and he, you know what?I think I have this question like copied.But whatever.No, you go.Yeah.It's, it's a very simple question.
21:47He was like, wait, it's weird that she has a, a bar that she brings all the same dates to.and one every day of the week.Every day of the week.And he was like, is it weird to be, to be weirded out by this?Your Martini Monday at Greg's guy.Yeah.People need to calm the fuck down.It's a good bar.
22:08Like, you don't go to a place you don't know for a date unless you're feeling superadventures or there's like a reason, right?If you guys are both like, we really want to try Boba or this band is in town or whatever,you typically will go somewhere you know is good, right?Because you know it's good.So there's going to be a level of familiarity with any date that you're taking people to.So getting offended over this stupid.Two, it's probably somewhere near her home, which is good for you, by the way.
22:34Three, maybe she knows the people that work there.And ergo it is a safe space.Yes.Four, fuck off.What are you doing?What are you upset about?Again, the possibility that woman might go on dates.Like, I had a regular at my bar who would come in on her dates on Sunday.
22:51Sunday guy.Sunday guys.specifically because I worked Sunday and she knew that I would keep an eye on things.I had her back and I would also wing man the fuck out of her.So, and I'd give her honest to me, right?Like if someone was shit, she would usually like leave and then come back like five minutes laterand have another drink or she would just stay and we usually talk about her or whatever.And that's nice, right?
23:16It's nice, especially for a woman to be able to be like, I know that if this guy's acrazy person, the bartender has my back.I know that if I go to the bathroom and leave my drink unattended, they're keeping an eye on it.I know that like these things are here in place for my safety.That's good.And that's great for you because now she's not nervous or as nervous.Yeah, which helps you.The general state of the world.
23:40And she can relax and focus on the date as opposed to being like, oh, well, I'm near his house.So I'm now I'm really worried that like he's going to really try a strong arming and coming back with him or blah, blah.Like it takes all of thatAnd scared bubbly energyAnd turn it into just like you can focus on the dateCalm C's yeahAnd again, it's a place that she knows is decentOr else she wouldn't go there, I assume
24:03And if it's near her house, hell yeah, this is good.You and anyone who feels upset about this dayI mean, this goes back to my rant that we just talked aboutLet's bear down on it. Why are you upset?It's just because it hints at the possibleThat she goes to on more dates than just this one.Cool, buddy. Have you been on more dates?If not, did you want to? Probably.
24:23It's also, I believe, if I remember correctly, a first date.So are you saying that this woman could not have gone on another, like you're upset that this woman before meeting you went on dates prior to knowing you existed at this place?Like, think for two seconds, rationally and logically.Yeah.And again, I'm going to reiterate the advice that I gave when it comes to jealousy.You need to say two things.One, is this person doing this on purpose to make me feel bad?No.
24:49Of course she isn't.And two, am I doing the same thing?Yeah.Or am I a gigantic hypocrite?Yeah.Have you been on dates?Would you take two different women to the same bar on a date at different points in time?Most likely.
25:04Presumably.And if you, if not, like one, you're going to probably run out of places soon.You're going to run out of places, dude.Two, it's like even if that's a thing you do yourself, is it reasonable to expect her to do thatjust randomly?No, it's not.You're doing a weird thing.they're actually kind of to a way more normal thing.
25:22So it's like your life is going to be easier if you stop getting these like knee jerk responsesbecause it's okay to suddenly feel a little jealous because like, oh wait, she's on other dates.Like she brings me here.Is it not special?Does she go on all these dates?Like if you get a flash of thinking that, that's fine.I don't care.I'm not coming down on you for that.
25:39What I'm coming down on you for is making it a problem.If you think that for a hot second, but then you go, I think I'm being a little over the top here.It's totally normal for her to go on other dates.and the fact that she's going to the same place,just kind of makes sense.And then you get the fuck over it.No issues, no issues at all.In fact, you get the opposite of,
25:57your criticism for me because that's rad.I think it's awesome that you're able to recognize the thing,move past it.But like, just being butt hurt and upsetand making an issue over fucking nothingwhen if you thought about it for one second,you'd realize it's a very rational, reasonable thingthat you probably also fucking do,
26:15then you're either an idiot or an asshole or both.And also, it's not even just,It's something that you might do.It's going to be something that you encounter over and over again in your dating career.And if this is what's going to blow your shit up, you're going to have a really bad time.And this goes back to how I was talking about all these people who are saying, oh, dating is so hard.Dating is this, dating is that.It's because you're putting these superficial roadblocks in front of you.
26:41Like, you've spent all day at your job building a brick wall and then you slide it into the road and then on your way home, you crash into it.That is, that's what you're doing when it comes to dating.You're building up all these made up things that if you just get out of your own way,and then you will have, oh, the roads suck around here.Yeah.Why did women build these roads?We're going to take a quick second, a very brief break to deconstruct some of these walls you've put in the middle of the road to make sure people can get home safe.We're back.
27:34And the roads, once again, safe.Dude, Snucky bust into my house a second ago, kicked a ghost in the day.and just ran out.Yeah, well, not professional behavior,kind of rookie behavior.Well, rookie, yeah.Then one of that real ghost hunters was like,I'm sorry, we were going to email.
27:49I was like, that would have been professional.And she said, oh, I'll take notes.The other ghost didn't apologize,or the other ghost hunter didn't apologize to the ghost.No, they're kind of shitty.They're kind of shitty.And the thing is, my ghost, not a bad, not a bad one.Your place is haunted for sure.
28:03Every time you get up, your webcam starts following a,nothing.Imagine the hell it must be.to be a ghost and you're stuck in the attic of some guy who's podcasting.Dude, that sucks.Because you don't even get the full podcast, you'll get half of it.So that's even worse.Yeah.
28:20Yeah.It was like when my partner was dealing with her wisdom teeth surgery,she was very fucked up on pain meds.And she was in the, like, my bed is quite literally right behind me, like through the wall.There's a doctor on, doctor's your own bedroom, bro.Yeah.And she was like, I felt like I was going.going insane because all I could hear. And this was also our, this was no quest for the wicked.
28:43So it was our role play. So it was just me doing voices and saying insane shit. And she was like,it was hell. It was a challenging time. This is by street mongoose. Sorry, did I cut you off?Nope, street mongoose. Let's go. This is by street mongoose. Girl I'm dating wants me to pretend to beher ex around her grandmother. 29 year old male. She's 28 year old female. We've been seeing each otherfor three months. She invited me to a family dinner this weekend. Yesterday, she told me hergrandmother's dementia and still thinks she's dating her ex from four years ago. They were togetherfor years and her grandma knew him well. When she explains they broke up, her grandma gets upset,but then later forgets. Her family has stopped correcting her. She asked, if her grandma calls me
29:23her ex's name, could I just go along with it? I wouldn't have to pretend I'm him or make-up stories,just answer normally and not correct her. I like this girl. I'm finally in a good place and I'mmaking money and I can see this becoming serious, so meeting her family matters to me. Still,being introduced while her grandmother thinks I'm her ex feels strange. Refusing also feels insensitive.when her grandma can't control it.Would you go along with it for the night?This is hard in a way that I don't think he intended.I think the problem is very simple.
29:50Yeah, I think I would go along with this.No, no, no.You're missing the big issue here, which is being X.So she had another date once?Wait, hold on.Every day of the week at the same bar all the time?She's brought another guy to her home before to meet her family.This isn't a new family.
30:09She brings guys home to meet the same family every time.This is the same grandpa?Yeah, I mean, I think I would, I would, I would, sort of, uh, reveal my uneasiness about it.I would let my partner know and be like, hey, I'm happy to do this, right?Like, I understand where you're coming from.It does skeeaf me out a little bit.Not necessarily the fact that it's your ex, but more like lying.Like it's, that seems strange to me as, as.
30:39based on my nature.Like, I don't like deceiving people.And it feels...Yeah, you only like to lie for yourself, right?Yeah, I don't want to deceive on behalf of someone who's not even good.I remember it.Yeah, like, for me, I would do it.It's almost like a jealousy thing or like, like, oh, pride wise, like, I can't back down.
30:59This granny has to know I'm Jeff.You're like, I think it would be different if they were like, you do have to pretend you'rehim.Here are some stories.Here's your dossier.Yes.That would be one thing.But if it's just like if he says the name, if she says the name, don't correct her, that's pretty easy.
31:13And like, the family's all going to think you're rad for doing this.So it's kind of a win-win.You're helping out the granny.You're helping out your ex, your partner who's like in a pretty shitty position.I don't think that's a nice thing to have to ask somebody.But like, she's doing it for her granny's sake and for the dinner's sake and the family's sake and everything.So it's like, yeah, man, like, what are you going to do, not hang out with them until she dies or just be a dick?Yeah.
31:35And upset her every time you see her.Like, that's the option.Right? Like if someone was like, hey, can you do this thing as to not upset my grandma? Yeah. I do everything I can not to upset grandmas. Yeah. My granny has, my granny has dementia and she like mentioned that one of us had a kid. We don't. And we were just like, okay. There's no point in me being like, no, no, no. We didn't have a kid. It's like, who does that help? Yeah. Are we really going to fight this poor woman who's like, it's not her fault? So it's like, if she wants to have a pleasant chat and she just, yeah, exactly. And upset her and like, I think just, no, like, fine.that. It doesn't hurt anybody. Right. Exactly. No, actually, I'm Jeff. I'm not Steve. So can youplease remember that I'm Jeff? It's like she could want to 100% and is committed to rememberingthat you're Jeff, but can't. Like, that's the problem, dude. Yeah. I'm sure she would fuckinglove to not have dementia, asshole. Yeah. No, but for real, I think this is a victimless crime.It's fine. You're actually doing a nice thing. I don't think there's anything to feel weird about,
32:36really like I understand why you might feel a little strange but like you know I think the dangers here aremore I think what could hurt you is you go in and you seem shitty about it even though you are doingit in the sense of like every time she calls you the wrong name you look at everyone's like likeyeah don't do it in earnest do it with the understanding that you are making everyone in that room'slife easier you're putting them at ease you're making the grandma feel comfortable you'reupsetting anyone. Like, that's the frame you have to have. Not like, isn't this a wacky situation?It's not a wacky situation. It's kind of a sad. And also, I think there might be like kind of theurge to hang a lantern on like, oh, I'm doing it or like, you know, but I'm not really him. They all
33:23know, like they know what you're doing. So you don't need to kind of like, yeah, like wink like oryou know, ho ho. Like just, just pretend it's not happening and just move on. Yep. For that for that day,Don't think of you being like Steve, her ex.Just think, my name's Steve.There it is.For that day, you're Monday guy.Not Sunday guy.Yeah.
33:44This is a question that I pulled out of panic because I realized all my questions were deletedbefore we started recording.So who knows what it is?This is a wayward comment.I recently reconnected with a friend from high school.Should we date or stay casual?She's moving away in a year.We were kind of friends slash acquaintances to high school.
34:02We talked a bit, but never really hung out or texted.We're now both 21 in college.I recently saw her, sent her a DM,she invited me to come by an art studio where she works.She saw me there, seemed excited to see me,and came up to me, and we caught up a little.It was hard to gauge if the vibe was friendly or flirty,but she seemed a lot more excited to talk
34:20than I expected, considering we weren't super close,and we haven't spoken in three years.We talked a little bit about school and life and stuff like that.She told me that she's graduating in June,and she'd like to move out of the area.She's also taking 21 credits, full-time is 15.credits. So I imagine she's pretty busy, but she seemed to like talking to me. She invited me to come back again. So I don't know if that was flirty or just friendly. I mean, assuming she's actually into me, I don't imagine it could be anything serious. She's planning on moving somewhere else when she's done with college and she's taking more than a full load of classes. But I figure why not take the opportunity if it presents itself. Kind of had a thing for her in high school and I'd like more dating experience in general. I'm still a little hung up over my ex and I think having new experience would be good for me. But not that I want to use her to get over my ex.but I also don't want to go through another heartbreak
35:06if I get attached and she ends up leaving.Yeah, that was my initial kind of worry is like,are you equipped to do this?Are you able to?You, like, before we even think about her,you also don't know if this is what she wants,but like before we go anywhere, can you do this?Can you handle this?
35:22Because if you can, I don't see the issue.Like, if you're okay with her being busy,you're okay with her moving away,you're okay with her being casual.And by that, you know,it means she could see guys other days of the weekand go to the same bar.like if you're okay with that sure if you do think you're going to get clingy or weird if you were
35:39really into her in high school and you're going to like let that kind of be weird if you're going totry to stop her move away if you're going to detonate your life to move with her if you're going tobe weird and clingy even though you said it's cool to be casual like all these things i want you tobe honest with yourself otherwise why not yeah and there's there's a number of things that i thinkyou've like set up for yourself that you kind of have to get through now just outline one of thembeing able to equip or be equipped to make a choice of being like, well, I do want to date you andwe know there's finite amount of time. It also really depends on where she's moving too,right? Like, is she moving like the next town over that you could go and move with her and
36:13still like commute to college? Like if that's the case, or is she looking to like, leave the country,move the state or, you know, go across, you know, halfway across the country. Then like, sure.Yeah, that's something. But at the same time, maybe this is a romantic side of me.Maybe you start this relationship and it's incredible.and you realize that like maybe there is a life in another place with this person.You just need to, as now said, you just need to be able to make those decisions and know how to make them in the best interest of yourself and her.If your main knee-jerk reaction is like, should I date this person?I have no idea has any interest in me or should we be casual?
36:51I think you're jumping the gun.Yeah, that was also kind of a thing, which why I mentioned, like you don't even know if she's interested yet.It really feels like you saw each other once and you're like, could this be a year-long casual?relationship before she moves away. Like, buddy, maybe get that second hangout going. Maybe it's just afriend. The answer for that is very simple. Instead of going to what seems like her workplace to likecatch up and chat, you say, hey, outside. Let's grab a drink. And if she's interested in that,then in the planning stages, just make it clear that it's a date. Something is simple. It's like,oh, I always kind of had a crush on you in high school. So, you know, it's nice that I get to ask you out on a
37:28date. That's very sweet. You're very clear. I'm careful with that one.phrase it well.Phrase it confidently and coolly.Don't make it seem like I've always wanted you.Yes.Yeah.You know,because I do think that I've had a crush on you in high school can be really charming or can
37:41be really off putting.So just beware of that.But then at least, you know, she knows where you're at, as opposed to just thinking that like,oh, it's this guy kind of talked to wants to hang out.Yeah.And again, like, hey, you don't have to do it before second hang out.I would say just invite her out and gauge, like if you invite her out for non-visingat our work drinks, great. If she comes out and it works well, then you can kind of go from there.
38:05I don't think you should really make your move before you've hung out at least one more time,because again, so far it's been nothing. I don't know if I necessarily agree with that.I think you could shoot a shot whenever you want, but I don't think that's bad advice either.Like you reconnect with someone and then before you really get into it, they're just like,I want to date you. I like, you know, I think take your time. Do it at least one more hangout.You never know. They don't have time, Nile. Time is ticking. Every week that they-The theory is coming for all of us.Yeah, every Sunday that passes is the Sunday that he loses with her.
38:33Damn, it's true.Bedtime?This is by PWR-R-I-V.Man, I thought you were saying it was just time to stop and go to bed.I wish.I met a very nice woman.On the third date, we watched a movie at her place and snuggled on her bed.Now she has asked me to buy her a new bed, so Creaking will not disturb her roommates next
38:48when we hang out.Thoughts?I get the vibe.She wants a free bed.That's crazy behavior.Do you want to read the message?I would love to read the message.Didn't you know this last time that when they were,
38:58you make even a small movement, my bed makes noises.Neighbors are right next to me. It can be really disturbing.That's why even I'm lying next to you, I try not to move too much because my bed makes somuch noise. I've actually been thinking about replacing the bed for a while now.But for the moment, I don't have enough money. I'm trying to save up.First thing I want to do is pay for a new phone.After that, I'll start saving for a new bed.Then we'll be much more comfortable.
39:17Honestly, if you'd help me, I'd really appreciate it.It would mean a lot to me, you know?Since I moved to Vermont, you're the first and only man I've ever led into my bedroom.So, when do you think you'll have time for us to go pay for the bed and get it set up?That's crazy.that's wild.Yeah.It's brilliant.
39:33The worst thing is.There is,yeah,it is brilliant because there's an implied,like,we're getting the bed so we can fuck.And that's a pretty good carrot,right?
39:41Like the carrot of like,I do want sick.The bed is making noise when I move.So we couldn't possibly do anythingthat requires more movementuntil I get a new one.And unfortunately,phone comes first and then and then bed.
39:56But you could just buy that bed.And then we can make all the movement we want on that bed.Could you just come over with a screwdriver and tighten the bed?Yeah, that would be fucking, that would be a boss move.Be like, hey, so funny.Don't worry.Don't even worry about going to, going to, I'll come with a solution to this problem.Can a WD 40?
40:15Yeah.And a screwdriver and an Allen key.Boom.Yeah.No, don't do this.Beds are expensive, man.We just bought a new bed and literally just the frame of it was expensive.So it's like,
40:28We're still using the mattress.Like, I don't have to buy a new mattress, thankfully.But, like, we bought a new, like, bed frame.And it was not cheap.No, nothing's cheap.In this economy, a bed for someone you met once?Like, it's, like, it's fucked that they even asked.It's such a wild, rude, disrespectful, kind of demanded, I guess.
40:47Yes.Like, it started as a, like, oh, because it helped me.When are we doing it?When are we going to get it?When are you free to pay for my fucking bed, bro?Yeah.I don't know.She doesn't know.
40:57make you, it's like a mobstermake you dig your own fucking great.And like, not that I think it mattersnecessarily, but it's like, you're not like, there'sno guarantee that you're going to even hang out afteryou get her this new bed. Like, you're dating.You're not long term. Oh, yeah.She's moving on to phone guy next. He's never
41:16going to see this woman after he buyshis bed. You're going to be on a party with her friends.You're like, you're bad guy. Yeah, yeah. That's phone guyover there. There'scouch guy, air friar guy.That's crazy behavior. I,look, I appreciate the hustle.And if it works...
41:30I don't actually.I don't appreciate the hustle.I think it's shitty.Like, it is for sure.The hustle usually is.But I think if you find a dumb person enough to buy you a bed, I wish I had the gumption.I was talking to this with my friend the other day where I was just like, it must be nice to be just such a rampaging asshole that you're just like...Just have missing the part of your brain that fucking gives a shit.
41:54I feel shame.Yeah.Must be such a...easy life. Hey, that's very relevant to what we're about to talk about for bad sex writing.But before we get to that, thank you for coming along today. We love you. If you want to supportthe show, please pop on our Patreon, support us at any level. You'll get extra episodes. We'reabout to record them right now. It's going to be wild, I think, given the energy that we'rebuilding up to, the crescendo. But if you want to support us in other ways, please let
42:19friend know, rate and review us wherever you can. Share us on Reddit or post an episode. Find oneof our reels, comment on it, like it, share it, send us a message. Send us in your own questions.I feel like people have been a little shy lately. Send us in your dating, your dating quandaries.What I would really like is anytime you see someone, like we can't, we can't do much postingon Reddit because someone got us banned from a lot of the pertinent some Reddits.Who did that? And I would love like, if you ever see people be like, if they're not exclusivewith you after 12 seconds of magic with you, they don't love you, just be like, hey, it soundslike you could maybe use some advice and to broaden your horizons. Here's a, here's a show. And
42:59you just hit them with our link. Yeah. And we're not allowed to do that. Will I get you banned as well?Maybe. I don't think it will. I don't think it will unless you're part of the podcast. And we'rethe only two people on the podcast, I'm pretty sure. And the ghost. But they can. Yeah. Yeah,they also got banned from Reddit. Uh, you ready for some bad sex writing? Thank you,Josh Eagle and the Harvesto for the song Paper Stars. So I saw somebody complaining about acontent creator today. Um, because they had apparently done a video on Cornell.And this is a woman.And I guess they had mishandled it in a lot of ways.
43:28The woman is complaining or the woman made the video?The woman is the content creator who did what I can only really.And I had to watch this fucking video because I didn't want to like go off half cocked about it or go on like a secondhand retelling.And I think it was a really shitty take where they were like there's a lot of like knee jerk reactions.I'm going to give a more nuanced take about Cornell incident.And like they didn't really say much.and they definitely didn't want to say things didn't happen,but they did kind of have a 30-something minute video
43:58where they really pandered to the peoplewho are trying to deny that a crime took place.Basically by bringing up all these evidence against Jane Doe,but then kind of like, oh, but it's not that big of a deal.But like they'll spend 10 minutes talking about like a text she sentand then be like, but then this happened.But like it was very like coy where they're clearly trying not to be like,well, actually I didn't say,
44:22it didn't take place, but also just their comments are all these people are like, yeah, it's not a crime.Like, fuck women. It's pretty disgusting.We don't know the most disgusting thing while talking about Jane Doe.They said, how avoidable all of this was.Let's just say there are moments where you need to keep your pants on.And one very good way to do that is with a great belt.And then they went into their fucking sponsorship of a belt company.I shit you not.
44:47This sounds like it's from a fucking S&L skit.Like, girl, the fuck are you?doing? I'm, I don't know if I could ever use the phrase correctly, but I'm flabbergasted.My gas were flabbard instantly. I, because I saw them and I was like, this can't be real.Because I've seen some pretty cringe, like, we're inserting an ad here. And like, it'd be hard outhere to put an ad in naturally, but like, I do say, this ain't it. This is not it. And I fuckinghope to God the advertiser was like, oh, no, no, no, not like this. Yeah, I, so I wenton a, when the October 7th attack happened, there was a lot, I saw a huge spike in anti-Semitism.
45:32And despite the fact that I do think that we should be critical of Israel and its participation in the genocide in Gaza and of the Palestinian people, I also don't think that attacking Jewish people is akin to that, right?No, they're two very different things. There's the state of Israel doing a genocide and then there's people who are Jewish.Yeah. And I take that stuff pretty seriously. My godparents are Jewish. And I don't like any sort of racism regardless. And so I ended up for whatever reason, I don't know why I was getting pushed. I think it was just because of the way I was interacting with stuff on social media. I started getting pushed this like fitness influencer who was making like dog whistle anti-Semitic posts of being like, you know, it's important to do.88 reps to get rid of the like shit like that right being like I bet I you know I think the world would bebetter if everyone did you know 2.2 million just like really low effort really gross racist Nazi dogwhistling but then also had paid posts from a supplement and let me tell you and I saw like there waslike three or four of these dudes who were doing this uh and I went to every one of those sponsors and I waslike hey I've screenshoted some posts about this person
46:52And it might seem kind of like at first glance if you don't really understand the nuance here.I use nuance very liberally.But here is the context.So I sent like screenshots of the posts.And then I also sent like Wikipedia pages and like articles on like what the significance of those whistles are.And I'm proud to say.Didn't see any more ads for those.Hell yeah.
47:14Those supplements.And I will.You may go reach out to this belt company and we'll see what happens.I strongly believe in that kind of stuff.I think if you're using your platform for bullshit, I think you should absolutely not be making a scent off it.And I will be petty enough to blow your shit up.That's not even petty, though, right?No, sorry, I will be vindictive.
47:35What's the word I'm looking for?Righteous.Principled.Principled.Enough to, I will come for your horrible shitty sponsored posts because, yeah, something tells me belts to go is not sponsoring Cornell rhetoric.Hey, you never know.But maybe.Yeah.
47:52Well, good luck out there.Thanks for coming by.And if you see an Instagram post that's shitty and is promoting something that you don't agree with.But they're also promoting a product.Tell that product.Get these people demonetized.My name is Day Miller.And I'm my husband.
48:09We've been your fuck buddies.
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