Fear& - A Chat w/ Pokimane | Fear&Drama

Episode Date: November 20, 2023

✨ BONUS CONTENT ✨ PATREON - https://www.patreon.com/FearAnd🎧 AUDIO PLATFORMS - https://linktr.ee/fearand⭐️follow our guest!!!!!⭐️Poki: https://twitter.com/Pokimanelol❤️ follow Fear&! ❤️Hasan: https://twitter.com/HasanthehunWill: https://twitter.com/TheWillNeffQT: https://twitter.com/QTCinderellaAustin: https://twitter.com/AustinontwitterMarche: https://twitter.com/MarcheFear&: https://twitter.com/FearAndPod0:00 - Intro3:00 - Austin didn't need to bring this up05:10 - QT Cinderella is hot07:45 - Austin loves Hasan's bathroom lighting10:13 - Drama time!17:40 - BREAKING: POKI ADDRESSES CONTROVERSY 25:12 - Travis Kelsey's past tweets (himbo)31:03 - Streamer Awards 202436:30 - George Santos is for the girls43:00 - Only fans + Austin Show48:38 - Osama Been ladin tiktok51:00 - Tswift themed cruise56:00 - Nude Photoshoot1:01:24 - Wow we made it over an hour / Baby Fever#hasanabi #pokimane #podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

um there's people pay to look like you literally a lot of money i would pay to look like you me too swift tries to look like you i hate this no she did it first there was an episode that there was like this there's this clip i just saw it came up on my youtube where i'm bragging about how i give good blow jobs but i look like an actual trash goblin that i'm like oh my god i didn't know was it on our podcast where you bragged about getting good blow jobs yeah? Yeah. I didn't even remember that. And I was wearing like, I dreamed this, man. I was wearing this shirt with Aiden on it, and I just looked like homeless. Wait, I wasn't there. And I'm like a homeless woman bragging about head.

No, you probably just look like a little, like a freak. No, I look homeless. No, it feels, bro, you just ordered Chick-fil-A. Why are you eating my Cheez-Its? You ordered an entire bag full of Chick-fil-A. He just went to the gym. Allow him. Yeah, I'm very hungry.

Sorry to interrupt you, Hassan. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another episode of the Fear Ann Podcast with your favorite host, minus one, who died of a tragic self-sucking accident. Will Neff, rest in peace. We'll miss him. Joining us today is the queen, an icon. Some would compare her to Beyonce. Beauty?

Well, a lot of people say that too. I would say that. Pokey Man, everybody. Oh my God. We're so happy to have you on the podcast. Thank you so much for joining us. You guys have such a fun pod. Yeah, we just chill and fight and love sometimes.

Oh my God, I watched an episode today because whenever i go on a podcast i like to get ready while watching the podcast yeah and the episode i watched you guys talked about how you cried i did and i thought that was i did like in a way you guys must have bonded so much no no we we made him well no hasan just okay that, I mean, I wasn't sure if I heard that right. Because you said, you guys made me cry. And I was like, is he talking about like comments or something? But it was actually you guys? No, like they made me cry.

Hasan just sat there while I was crying like. So did I. Hasan and I made eye contact where we were like, I don't know what to do. And then Will hugged you. Will was the only one with empathy. I'm so glad Will was there. Because I feel like he would really balance that out, you know?

Yeah, Hassan was... I don't know how to deal with that kind of stuff. He doesn't know how to deal with emotions. Like, when there's, like, a death in the family or if, like,

a person I know has, like, someone pass away, I literally don't know how to console them. So what do you do? Do you just stand there like, yeah, it sucks?

How do you be like that? Because I kind of want to be like that. I'm like, oh, that sucks. Well, not in regards to the debts, but just in general. A little less in touch with my emotions, to be honest. I tend to say the wrong things in times of grief, on accident. Like I try to

be supportive. Well, one time my friend, his mother died and it was very sad. It was a very sad situation, but I don't even know if I should be talking about it. Don't follow up with a but. You need to. No, but, like, I put my foot in the, okay, so he showed up to my, I kick myself every single day that I think about this,

but one time he showed up at my house on Mother's Day, and it was the same year that, and I opened the door and I didn't expect him because it was very random and I didn't know what to say. So I said, happy Mother's Day. And I, oh my God. And I, that's not that bad at all.

What do you think about that? I think it sucks. I don't think it's, it's not like he doesn't hold it against you, but I think that's like, it's just like a fuck. And they both looked at me and I was like, oh. It's just deflating think that's like it's just like a fuck and they both looked at me and i was like oh so what do you guys have the first year it's just like yeah

and it was like the first year and i was like oh but then it becomes funny i didn't mean to obviously at least it wasn't like right when she passed i thought that's what you were no no no i i was how many months how many months had gone by like probably five what do you think that's tough that's rough it was the first Mother's Day. Are you trying to wager how much of a piece of shit I was based on the time? Oh, I know you're a piece of shit. At least it wasn't intentional. Yeah, at what point in the...

Yeah. Is it appropriate? When is it appropriate to start making jokes? You can't until your parents die. Okay. You can't make a dead parent until you have one. Okay. It's a rite of passage. So once you have... it's like, okay. Yeah. When you're an orphan, like me.

It's like. Both your parents are dead? Well, my dad only calls me for help. Oh. So it's like kind of like. Emotionally. It's like repurposing. Wait, is that word that way?

Like when your parent passes away. I mean, it's tragic, of course. But when that tragic thing happens and you're like, let's say 50. I love the get ready with me mid podcast. When you're like 55 years old and your dad passes away and your mom passes away, like are you still considered an orphan? You can get scholarships. This is just what was sent to me for free.

Scholarships? I love it. This is not. was sent to me for free. You can get scholarships? I love it. This is not. This is bad. I used a lot of Charlotte Tilbury. I mean, I like Charlotte Tilbury, but I also have just garbage in there. You got eyeliner? No, I used eyebrow.

What are you wearing underneath this jacket? It's like a dress and like a dress. She looks like she's ready to host a streamer award. Yeah, what the fuck? Actually. She looks fabulous. I'm going through it. What is this sexy ass shit you got on?

I just want to slutty. Oh, is that makeup over there? She's in her redemption. And you still look so good. Reputation. You're just being nice. No.

Listen, I think we need to have what do you call this? An intervention. A makeover. I want to be like I want to be like Uh oh.

Which mic did you lose? The one Austin is currently touching. Wait, wait. Austin's mic is cursed because of who he is. He also touched it. Keep talking, Joy. Hello, hello, hello. Okay.

I think we need to have an intervention because you've gone too long being delusional. Agreed. About how baseline hot you are yeah literally wow because listen everybody can learn how to do makeup and dress whatever whatever whatever whatever your baseline features top five percent i think if i lost seriously 20 pounds we could be there we would not be able to tell my mom said who is that she's gorgeous right i'm serious i'm not even kidding my mom says that every time. I'm holding your hand to infuse these thoughts.

Every time you walk in through the door, my mom says that. That I'm pretty? Who is that woman? That's not true. Your mom says that. I hope she doesn't do that. Like, why is she here? I hope she doesn't.

And did you pay her? Is she all right? Y'all want to show up in this outfit? He's like, uh. How much is that? How much is she? much is that what's that it's grilled chicken i i'm so rude i started eating without oh i thought it was something completely thank you wait you got olivia you got her food he also called me for food do you want to have some of mine i only got it because i felt bad if everyone else was gonna eat i was not gonna eat i

got nuggies i love homophobic chicken. This stream was brought to you by Chick-fil-A. Yeah, clearly. We're homophobic. Yeah, a little bit. We're doing BDS, but when it comes to homophobia, we're like supporting extra hard. I have a gross sore on my hand. Nobody look at it.

I'm not looking at it. I was mostly talking to Pokey. I looked immediately. I know. Because you touched my hand and then I felt bad and I'm like, she's going to think I have hand herpes. And now I'm eating it. I'm not giving you. I'm eating your hand hery. I looked immediately. I know. Because you touched my hand and then I felt bad. And I'm like, she's going to think I have hand herpes. And now I'm eating it. I'm not giving you.

I'm eating your hand herpes. What was that? Marsh, I'm sending. Is my mic okay here? Yeah, you sound great. Beautiful. I'm sending you drama. Oh, we have drama to talk about?

Yeah, he's going to pull up the drama. It's our Thanksgiving episode. I was going to talk about what we're thankful for, too. That's cute. Yeah. Yeah, it comes out Monday. When's Thanksgiving? Monday.

A week from today. Oh, okay. What day of the week is Thanksgiving? Thursday. Always. Wow. By the way, Hasan. What a random day.

Your bathroom is great lighting. Good point. Did you take naked photos in my fucking bathroom? My shirt was off. Can we see that? My shirt was off, but I did take one or two. For Twitter or for others? You defiled my bathroom with your nudie pics?

No, they weren't nude, but like they were. Did you send them to someone who's responding to you currently? Yeah, but. Excited. What's wrong with that? Look, here. Look, your lighting was hitting. Look at that.

If you're going to share, just send it to Marsh. Damn! You look like you share them every day. Can I put that on the podcast? You can put that on the podcast. All right. Send it to Marsh.

You want your bathroom on the podcast? I want to know what is in the background. Okay. If there's anything in the background. What would be in the background? I don't know. Like drugs and stuff? No, you're not that cool.

Hasan has a Karma Putra book in his bathroom. Oh, there's my downstairs bathroom. Karma Putra, like Kama Sutra, but for pooping. He's like a 70-year-old woman. I didn't buy it myself. Someone sent it to me in my P.O. box. I have a Vladimir Poo

tin smell thing, too. By the way, your bathroom is falling apart. I turned off the water and the handle came off. I grabbed the faucet. It was like, yeah. I pulled it off.

I was like, what the hell is going on? But what's the drama? Sorry. Well, we have to look at your nude photo. Marsh is going to pull it up. I did. Actually, Marsh. I did.

Is it not sending? Yeah, there you go. Look, there you go. Sometimes drugs have like addresses on it. That's why I was trying to figure out. Look, I'm not. Sometimes drugs have, like, addresses on it. That's why I was trying to figure out. Look, I'm not, you know, I'm trying to get back into shape. You look ripped in that. I'm trying to get a little bit. Oh, like, I feel like you've been looking ripped.

He is ripped. But I just did an arm workout. Yo, let me get that Chick-fil-A sauce. I want to dump it in there in a little bit. Thank you. Welcome. All right, Pokey, what's the drama? Okay.

Or Pokey. I could tell you. My're welcome. All right, Poki, what's the drama? Okay. Or Poki. I could tell you. My drama is Poki. The drama's Poki. Wait, really? Yeah. As per usual. Uh-huh.

Pull up this message I received from Beanance. It says, it's a note from Poki that says, Hi, Kitty and Lud. I hope you enjoy these cookies and gifts. Keep killing it with all the amazing events and everything. How did she get your box? Much love, Pokey. And I said, give me my cookies, Beanance.

So I think it's drama. Maybe you'll get hers. Maybe. We'll see what happens. I hope so. But I'm pissed. Damn. That's why I didn't. I brought you guys something you wanted to try. Oh, you did? No, that was mine. I asked for it. I'll have one. Let me eat one. So, Pokey has, for those that are wondering, Pokey has a new cookie brand.

Why don't you talk about it, Pokey? Because you're better at it than me. All I saw about your cookies, because I didn't get any, Shroud took them, was I saw you tweet out, and I was like, that's exciting that Pokey's doing cookies.

I didn't expect that, by the way. Least expected thing. Yeah, so many people were like, I have skincare. That's what I was like, that's exciting that Poki's doing cookies. I didn't expect that. Right. By the way, least expected thing. Yeah. So many people were like, skincare. That's what I was thinking you would do. Yeah. Because you have both. Those are, you're good at both of those things.

Thank you. Did you not know? Or like hair care. No. Can you imagine? Right. But I think my issue is that I just didn't feel like I had anything innovative or any ideas to bring to that industry.

I see. Yes. I feel like everything's anything innovative or any ideas anything to bring to that industry yes i feel like everything's been done in those industries so what i did really freaking want was snacks that both didn't have a bunch of random weird ingredients but still tasted good as hell and that's what we made period i'm excited it's gonna be the first time i've ever tried your cookie can we try them now? Mm-hmm I've never been with people as like at least not on camera as they've tried it the first time. Well, we'll pretend either way Mina yes, yeah, mine is a kind of bird

Dessert what flavors is midnight midnight mini cookies So that's our little mascot. Oh, I was going to ask you what the name was. Cute little thing. It's a little dessert. What flavor is this? Midnight mini cookies. Midnight mini cookies. They're like dark chocolate. And you're going to do more flavors? Oh, not just cookie flavors. That's the thing. We're not just launching cookies. We're just doing snacks.

There are so many snacks I want to make. That's cool. Especially a spicy snack. Yeah. Like a spicy healthy one. And then like a salty savory one. Have you guys tried all dress chips that's good oh you like i'm serious because it's got it's got a dark chocolate but it's not

punch but it's not too sweet and if you add that with milk because it's a healthy cookie right if you put milk with that cookie you're gonna you won't even realize that it has less calories i'm serious there's's seven for 140 calories. That is amazing. Okay, that's legit. You're going to have it. You have QVC voice on right now. I love it.

Okay, I'm trying it. You're just mad that there's a successful woman in the room, okay? Are you saying QVC is not a successful woman? Oh, my God. That's not what I meant. I'm not. Oh, my God. I am not. I put my foot in my mouth so much i'm so fucked up cutie

i'm not cutie you are successful we talked about net income the other day when we were taking our nearly nude photo shoot and will was like i made this much last year and that's how he talks and then austin was like i made this much last year and i was like sheesh i'm poor i'd be so interested in hearing you guys don't want to share? Well, what I think is awful, it was just, I just think that women need to be paid more. I'm dissecting this cookie. It's true.

I think women need to be paid more. I think there's a massive way. I think the girls and the gays both, actually. I think there's a massive wage gap. What about straight white guys? No, I think we need to murder them. Tell me, I think you guys a massive wage gap. What about Shreya? Why, guys? No, I think we need to murder them. Tell me. I think you guys did something genius here. So if you guys don't know from a pastry chef, me,

these are very similar to the texture of Oreos. I don't know if you've heard that feedback. I have. It's very similar to the texture of Oreos. In Oreos, the cream filling, a lot of people don't know this, it's just vegetable shortening and sugar. That's all it is yep and in this the cream filling i'm assuming is coconut oil and coconut sugar is that yeah yeah it's very smart it's a really smart way to do it because

those things are both good for you way better than vegetable shortening this is what i mean yeah that's genius thank you that's very smart that That's actually a way that when I was a pastry chef, we would use like whenever we made vegan, I mean, vegetable shortening is vegan, but usually people would, you know, want it a little nicer and we'd use coconut oil. Which is nice. So they're plant-based.

Yeah, it is plant-based because normally coconut oil won't hold. Like it's much softer. It's much softer than Oreo, which you can like see. I have a question. Yes. Why vitamin D? Because. Because you need it come on now get your blood work then we'll talk yeah exactly no but i that was actually the one thing that i i personally requested i was like hey can we

maybe put you know some kind of functional benefit like vitamin d even if it's just a, it's enough to be considered like a good source of vitamin D as a snack, which is nice. But I just know, not just gamers, but I mean, we're all on our screens a lot and we're probably all kind of deficient in vitamin D. How much vitamin D is in it? A lot. Those are great. Those are really great.

I think 15 to 20% of your daily, something like that. Poki, those are genuinely good. I would tell you. I'm glad you guys like them. You can tell mei, those are genuinely good. I would tell you. I'm glad you guys like them. You can tell me if they're like, okay. I would tell you. And to be honest, obviously like a cookie or any kind of snack, you know, it's not maybe for everyone's taste palette, right?

Like some people might not really like sweet. But there's different flavors. It's totally fine. Not yet. Someday, someday. Oh, there's not different flavors yet. We're in the lab cooking. Okay, gotcha, gotcha.

Not yet, not yet. So how does the process work? Do you, do you you like what are you contributing in in this and i'm asking very nothing no i know i'm kidding because i'm genuinely just curious like so when i say this was two years in the making i mean the ideation the market testing the branding the putting together the team of people that we're working with in order to bring this to life. And then finding the right CEO. That took a hot minute.

Yeah. Yeah. And that happened almost a year ago. And then I've been involved like every step of the way in the sense of I need to be part of the final decision making process of every step we take. Whether that's the branding, whether that's the branding, whether that's the website. And then once we started working with the CEO, I told her my goals and hers,

making sure we're on the same page. And then I taste test everything and I tell him I like this, I don't like that. Can we add this? Can we change that? Basically, every little thing, even contractually,

it's like, because also I don't want to wind up in a situation where I'm forced to push something I don't like. So contractually, I'm like, because also I don't want to wind up in a situation where I'm forced to push something I don't like. Yeah. So contractually, I'm like, I need final say in everything. Yeah. That was very smart. Like I said, since I used to be super into food, that's why I was interesting.

You still are. Well, yeah. You're still good at food. I barely, I don't very stream very much anymore, but yeah. So I was curious what you do for the dip. Like, let me get you one for the food thing but that's you you taste test everything and then you give feedback and do you guys have like a higher is this darcy person the hired like chef so she's not necessarily the chef but she has 20 years of like food cpg oh it's like food scientist yeah she worked at kellogg's

noosa plantera wow she's done like startup foods everything yeah sorry for picking your brain on like the back end stuff i don't know if that's interesting to anybody else but i'm like no please i i'm glad i have a chance to actually answer these questions from the perspective of someone who's like just curious and asking and not from some random incel on twitter all right now now that we now that we got through the now that we got through the background let's talk about the drama. Drama alert. Drama alert. Yeah, of course there's drama.

What do you mean is there drama? Seems stupid. What is the drama about? How could there be drama over a fucking cookie? It's a cookie. Because a woman made the cookie. You forget this. There's that. Not to be like.

There's that. Pokey has a lot of haters. Pokey does have a lot of haters. We share a lot of haters Pokey does have a lot of haters We share a lot of haters True You know actually sometimes Sometimes I think of Hassan In an inspirational way Where I'm like

He really does not give a fuck How can I learn to not give a fuck Yeah You know I was getting numb to it after a while But What ended up happening is A fuck. Yeah. You know? I was getting numb to it after a while. But. I don't know. What ended up happening is.

Immediately they found another cookie. That looks similar I think. I don't know what the exact details are. But they were saying that you had yoinked this other cookie. And slapped the Mina. Mina. Mina. But yes. name on it

and that you were upmarking it or something. So go ahead. Address the drama. By the way, I just want to say, if you were white labeling, bitch, have you bought any merch from any streamer ever? It's all white labeled. What are you talking about? What do you mean? I'm fucking

I'm source meshing myself. You're making it that yourself. Sew it. Sew it right now in front of us. ever it's all white labeled what are you talking about what do you mean i'm fucking i'm sourcing yourself so in it with your so it's right now in front of us yeah he pays his workers very well they all have health benefits right or something you knew jobs baby that's right anyway sorry so let me explain i launched the cookie the name name, Midnight Mini Cookie. Midnight Cookie, by the way, is like a dress term. It's like 2% milk or like wheat bread. It's like you cannot trademark that word. It's like a chocolate chip cookie.

A midnight cookie. I could go bake a midnight cookie for the record. Thank you. You're welcome. So people found these really, really old images of a product that looks similar to ours and has the same name, Midnight Mini Cookie. And the thing is, we work with the same manufacturer. So we were aware of that product. It no longer exists. And it existed for one sample batch. And it was like sold at a Costco

months and months and months ago. And they didn't want to use that recipe anymore. So when we started working with this manufacturer, we tasted a bunch of stuff of theirs. But when I tasted, well, it was an older version of these. I was like, these are the ones that I like the most. So we took that recipe and we refined it a lot. Like whether it's where a certain ingredient is being sourced or the type of flour mix that we're using or the quality or whether it's organic or not.

All these little details to improve the ingredients list and add vitamin D and make all these changes, blah, blah, blah. Anyways, we refined it and came out with our own version. And this is delicious. Can I ask you, I don't know if you've... Oh, wait, I just want to add, by the way, like 80%, about 80% of the food you see on shelves is white labeled. Yeah. You know, we're not. Yes.

This is, these cookies were made two or three weeks ago. Yeah. So they're like fresh batch. People, I think, were misled into thinking it was some kind of scam where I'm taking these cookies and putting my packaging on. It's not like that at all. They're entirely different. That's insane. Aside from the name and like the similar type of cookie and we're working with the same people it'd be so much work

to take those cookies and de-package them and put your i know anyways i hope that clarifies because i know like explaining the behind the scenes of this kind of business like people obviously don't know these things i think it's fascinating i think so too i really do i just don't like that people try to frame it as a scam where i'm like then every company out there is scamming you like yeah we cannot own a whole manufacturer that makes a bunch of recipes that would be like insane money that would be like top 500 fortune company kind of money so um what is and you might not know these answers and it's if you don't know the, just whatever. How do you get sustainably sourced palm oil? I've never heard of that, ever.

I actually, I know, like I've watched documentaries about palm oil. Yeah, Maya's my best friend, so I'm always like, wait a second. Yeah, so I saw that and I was like, oh, that's sick. I should ask. I don't know the details. I just know that it's sustainably sourced. Okay, so you got to learn. Which was really important to me too because when i was reading through i was like palm oil hold up it was like no it's sustainably sourced so yeah i should look into that so i can

share with people that'd be hype i'd love to learn about that that's very cool thank you for bringing your cookies pokey thanks for tasting them where can they get i did not want to do this hashtag ad oh i did i just wanted you guys to i told told her. I said, bring the cookies. We're doing an ad. We're not paying a shit. How many of these cookies do you have at your house? I have. I knew it. Ziploc bags this big. And you only brought one?

Well, do you guys want more? You're all getting some. Yeah. Except he didn't fill out the form. Yeah. Of course, Hassan didn't fill out the form. He never responds to my texts. It comes with a Stanley Cup, too.

Actually, you know what? You've gotten better at responding to text messages recently, Hasan. Thank you. Hasan has never not replied to me. Actually, when I call Hasan, he almost always answers my call. Thank you. Almost always. That's nice.

Almost always. So why did you start off by complaining about him? Well, I just like to make him look bad. But most of the time, he answers my calls. 50-50 on the text. If I call him before like 10am always that's the best time

to reach Hasan between the hours of 7am and 10pm 10am after he gets off the stream it's a little dicey

I'd say it goes it drops from 100% to like 70-30 he's gonna answer your call and then no way he's responding to your text

after a certain time really? is that true Hasan? did I accurately describe it? After 10, you're not going to get an answer from him. Are you asleep? Because you're sleeping. I feel like you answer the next day, though.

Sometimes. Sometimes he does. For me, I... He must really like you. Yeah, you've never not replied to me. My phone goes on do not disturb mode, and I'm such a boomer that it actually works. Same.

Like I never look at my, I never think to look at my messages. It doesn't pop up anymore, yeah. Yeah. Which I kind of like. Okay, so Hasan, when I call you, what goes through your mind? When you give me a call? When I call you. What does Austin need?

What do you think? This freaking. That's what I'm thinking. Which beep? This one right here, Pokey. I got it on my wrist. I love it. No, I'm just like, whoa, what's going on?

I don't even think about it. I don't know. What about you, Cutie? When I call? I usually think, what does Austin need? I don't call when I only need something. Most people only call when they need something. Really?

It's like the emergency thing to do. That's true. When you call me, I know that it's got to be something related to a show I'm doing for you. Or Hot Goss. Austin and I will talk Hot Goss. Oh, really? He didn't call me for Hot Goss. Three-way call me.

Because you're always live. Is there any other Hot Goss we could talk about? I'll be talking to you about Goss, Hasan, for 20 minutes. Then I'll realize, oh my God, he's not listening to me. That's not true. I'll be like talking to you. I'll be like, Hasan. Hasan?

He's asleep. I listen. Yeah, Pookie, Kitty and I talk hot goss every once in a while. We'll call and talk shit. There's no hot goss right now that I can think of. No. Nothing that we really talk about. Appropriate. All the goss There's no hot goss right now that I can think of. No. Nothing that we really talk about. Yeah.

Appropriate. All the goss. I got hot goss. What? Old Travis Kelsey Twitter has resurfaced. Oh, yeah. The Swifties have found it. Oh, no.

Of course not. What did he say? All right. Pull it up. Let's take a look. Really? Yeah. He's just a himbo.

He's just. Yeah. Yeah. Are the Swifties angry? Read it out. They're so excited. Let's have our local himbo He's just. Yeah. Yeah. Are the Swifties angry? Read it out. They're so excited. Let's have our local himbo read it out.

Oh, yeah. All right, pull it up. Well, I mean, I'm waiting for Marge to pull it up. Okay. Here, where's one? Killatraff struggling a thread. Here, click on that. Maybe there's more on that thread. Oh, that's cute.

I just gave a squirrely. He's our boyfriend. I just gave a squirrela a piece of bread, and it straight smashed all of it. I had no idea they ate bread like that. Ha ha. Hashtag crazy. Hashtag crazy.

Okay, but we used to use hashtags like, this is 2011. We used to use hashtags like, this is 2011, we used to use hashtags like this. It's just funny in comparison that in 2011, Taylor Swift was writing the words of like, and did your twin flame blue, or no, did your twin flame bruise paint you blue?

Did the love affair maim you too? Like, just like the most poetic, beautiful shit. Yeah, yeah and travis kelsey was writing and i and i will read this now it's such a nice day out bear with me it's such a nice day out as i stare wrote that wrong from my math class dot dot dot shaking my head hashtag must be nice why do i always have to be the one that stands out? I'm getting stared at like crazy in this airport. Shaking my head. Oh my God.

He's kind of dumb. USA versus find land. It is really cute. I miss playing hockey, watching this USA team dominate. Okay. What is he literally wrote? Find why? Why is just a dumb guy just so hot i think it's

because so attracted to it's like it's like against our evolutionary tendencies because they're predictable oh yeah versus being with like an unstable unpredictable person you're like oh they might hurt me but intelligence is also sexy too true but i like like i like i think dumb is better you know i'm not saying anything in this conversation i don't really have any i feel like i like i'm dumb in certain categories and smart in certain categories you know like keep me in like intellectually stimulated yeah yeah but but doesn't know how to spell finland and writes find land instead honestly i could forego knowing how to spell finland if he's just like really devoted and committed yeah faithful you know all right well i got more let's read more i i could see it i think so the

moon looks amazing like an amazing pr team though or what yeah don't ask me about his PR team drama you know Travis's PR person no I do not okay I do not I heard cutie Cinderella leaked she was something that uh Travis Kelsey's PR person had said it was through a makeup artist through a makeup artist in Las Vegas and yeah yeah except she was right except she was right. Except she was right. She brought it forward as like unsubstantiated rumors that she was joking about, like to not take seriously. What was it?

What was it? Well, I'm not. Please stop. What are you doing with that? That's like some Austin behavior. No backpedaling. Stay with your chat. I don't have a fidget spinner.

I'm ripping on my chicken sandwich. I, nothing. It was, what I don't have a fidget spinner. I'm ripping up my chicken sandwich. I, nothing. It was, what I said wasn't true. Okay. It was, the makeup artist said that it was a PR relationship because she was friends with his publicist and blah, blah, blah. And I was like, they're in love, ma'am. And she was like, no, blah, blah.

And I was like, blah, blah, blah. Even if it started, if it did start as a PR relationship, they are clearly in love now. So it doesn't matter. They seem really cute matter but yeah they're like I don't know anyway but I said that I quoted the makeup artist and the Swifties came from my head and I was like oh I'm sorry I was just chatting

shit on a podcast they love you now though right for entertainment what does it look like for the Swifties to come after you oh my god look at me Canyon's fucking Twitter page they are um well I was surprised because I am one of them and I didn't know Oh my God. Look at me. Canyon's fucking Twitter page. They are. Um, well, I was surprised because I am one of them and I didn't know that this subsect for the record,

it is a subsect. It's not all Swifties. The subsect of Swifties is the same as like certain subsects of BTS fans. I'm a Gaylor. And he's a Gaylor. Can I be a Gaylor? You don't want to be a Gaylor. No,

you want to be a Gaylor. You don't want to be a Gaylor. No, you want to be a Gaylor. You don't. It be a gayler. No, you want to be a gayler. You don't. It's like where they're speculating that Taylor is bisexual. Oh, yeah. See, you're a gayler.

You already know. That's fun. Yeah, Austin is homophobic. Don't listen to him. What? I'm not homophobic. I'm an ally to the gays. You are not.

I am much more of an ally. And Taylor is also an ally. She's not a part of the community. She's supposed to be something. Not enough to come out, but it's fine. I've actually seen a thread or two like that. It's drama. Hassan's so homophobic, he doesn't even have sex with men.

I'm fucking... Fuck you right now. You will what? Maybe in the bathroom where the lighting's good. You will fuck me right now. I'm going to be doing the fucking, okay? Everybody out here knows you be my bottom. Yeah, no, definitely.

Do you know that Justin Bieber meme where he's doing an interview and the lady laughs? That's a good laugh. That's what I think of when I hear this. Do you guys want me to read more of these? Or do you care about Travis Kelsey's Twitter? I think you like it. I think we've talked about it. Look, I respectfully, I'm not.

You know what? I'm learning pokey to be a little bit more honest with people. I don't want to read any more of these tweets. I like it. You are so anti-straight white man, dude. What the fuck's going on? No, no, no. I love straight white. We need to talk about it. We need to talk about it. What like it. You are so anti-straight white man, dude. What the fuck's going on? No, no, no. I love straight white. We need to talk about it. You hate him because he's

not gay. He doesn't play for the Minnesota Vikings. And I'm not as interested in him because this is a problem I have perpetually pokey is when I go out to with my friends, nobody wants to go to a gay bar. I know. I need to go with you.

I've never gone. You don't have to do that. You don't have to lie. Please. Judy, come on. You have to go with us to a gay bar. Pokey wants to go to a gay bar. Pokey, you don't have to lie.

You don't want to go. It'll give me a plus one point towards that thing you asked in my DMs. You know? Like, plus 10% chance I'll do it. There's zero percent chance. No, I've been thinking about it. Really?

God damn it. But I need, like, a month or two more to think of, uh you know anyways are you gonna come to the game are you guys doing secrets on a fucking podcast we do have secrets on a podcast if you want you could say it i don't mind oh i think i think i can predict it can i predict it yeah you asked her to host the stream awards with you i did well pokey feel great because she didn't ask any of us to do it. I didn't. She wants only women, which I thought gay is close. It's woman adjacent. That's what I was saying.

I'm just holding hands with Pogi. It feels nice. Pogi's like, I'm so lonely. Ever since I locked up, I've watched TV. No, actually living alone and streaming, bad combo. I just want to be on, I just want to roll all the stream rewards.

You want to what? I want a roll. I know. You've told me. You can have one. You're going to be my floor host. Oh, it's going to be

Be The Flower Girl. It's not even on camera. Yes, it is. Oh, that's the pre. I'm going to have you, no, not pre. Oh. I'm going to,

don't be, oh, during the show before the bands go on. I'm not good enough. You're going gonna be on the no this is a big role this is bigger than the red carpet oh okay okay

before the band goes on before there's four performers the one that opens the show are you hitting me I'm excited I don't wanna be a part of the show you're gonna be on the floor

while the stage is getting ready and you're gonna be going up to tables and talking to them oh my god how exciting and you have to come up with your questions and you have to improv that's so exciting. I can't tell if he's actually excited. I'm so excited.

No this is so great. I'm so excited. It's bigger than Alright you know what Cutie? It is bigger than Red Carpet. Cutie. I'll do it instead. No no no. No no I'll do it. I'll do it. Well he seems like he wants to do it. No I will do it. No no it's fine. He doesn't want to do it. I'll do it. I want to do it so bad. I'll do it. I'll do it in his place. No I'll do it. I'll do it

myself. It's fine. No, no, no. Hassan's bad at asking questions. No, I'm not. He's a terrible interviewer. I killed it on the red carpet. You suck on the red carpet. Oh, really? That's really interesting you say that.

It seems like people loved it though. Are you doing me the red carpet this year? I don't know. I don't know. Whatever he wants me to do. You don't repeat? That's the whole thing. Oh, I like it.

Every year I like, you know. Spicy. That's true. The whole point of the streamer awards is to have have highlight different people in different areas of the internet. If I use the same people every year, then it's, I do. She has asked me to do the thing that she just asked you to do. No, she wanted me to do the thing that she asked you. Now I said no originally.

No, you ruined it for him. Don't say that. I'm the second. Oh, he's lying. You know what? You know what? Sometimes the backup quarterback comes in and he him. I'm the second. Don't say that. I'm the second. Oh, he's lying. I believe him. You know what? You know what? Sometimes the backup quarterback comes in and he shines. That's a good attitude.

That's a good attitude. True. I got a little chip on my shoulder now. I'm cheering for the underdog. Thank you. Well, now everyone can bully Pokey online. Please. And try to get her to be my coach.

When's Mare done that? You need to do this. I would love for you to do this. Well, I'm thinking about it. You don't have to do the monologue at the beginning to do well i'm thinking about it you don't have to do the monologue at the beginning why not oh you do want yeah and i want everyone to see this is a big moment for women it's a powerful moment for women it is don't laugh it is he laughed because he hates listen he wishes this was an all-male award show. I like seeing the streamer awards just be fucking huge and then hosted by two vaginas.

Yeah. Or not and just identify as equally good. Two vaginas or a gay dick. Yes, adjacent. At least adjacent. Nobody wants a gay dick in here. I want to use your stylist that you used last year. I emailed them and they didn't reply.

Yeah. No, I'm excited for the streamers. Do we know when it is? She's busy. Are you telling us when it is? February 17th. Wait, did you announce it yet? I'm going to be in Japan. No, you won't

be. With the Taylor Swift concert. It's February 10th, actually. Yeah, I'm going to be in Japan for a week. I'm excited for the stream awards. I hope I win an award this year. I'm always excited. You don't stream. You don't stream. I had a couple things this year. You streamed like eight times this year. I had Namy Prize.

He tries for every year. You should do an award for someone who doesn't stream but is a streamer. No, it's League of Their Own. The Clint Stevens Award. Except Clint Stevens. Clint Stevens Award is a funny name. Would beat you, though, unfortunately. Yeah, Clint Stevens would win the Clint Stevens Award.

Well, you could always win streamer, streamer. Streamer. Streamer's Choice. But I don't really. Oh, Streamer's Choice, yes. Yeah, where everyone votes, you could always win streamer, streamer. Streamer, streamer's choice. But I don't really. Oh, streamer's choice, yes. Yeah, where everyone votes for in the audience. I'll try. Wait, if you do that, yes. Go around and tell everyone to vote for you.

I will do that when I'm hosting and I'll interview people. Just to make sure you vote for me. Yeah, you can do it. But they probably already submitted their votes because they do it at the beginning of the show. Okay, we'll have to rally people before. Just stand by the coat rack at the beginning and be like, hey, streamer, streamer. Okay, Pokey, will you vote for me, streamer? Do you Okay, well, I'll have to rally people before. Just stand by the coat rack at the beginning and be like, hey, streamer, streamer.

Okay, Poki, will you vote for me, streamer? Do you guys get votes? I'll vote for you three times. Oh, thank you so much. You say that? You said you guys, like, she's hosting, but she's denying me, actually. Well, I'm going to be there either way.

Okay, fair enough. True, I'm going to be there. Fair enough. Normally, we don't- Did you tell you I was going to think about it? Yeah. Okay. Well, wait.

Because you said I denied you. I thought you said no. But I don't remember if I told you that I was going to think about it, but I've been thinking about it yeah okay well wait because you said i denied you i thought you said no but i don't remember if i told you that i was going to think about it but i've been thinking about it yeah i'm happy to hear you're thinking about it okay so thinking about it hasan normally i don't talk about politics on the show but today there's a story oh let's do it today there's a story that you know santos yes okay there's a How do you know about the political team? It hit the gay world.

It hit the gay world. George Santos is. Wait, pause real quick. You didn't say you were thinking about it. You just said no. I should have messaged you and said that. And then I sent you a very convincing thing.

Yeah. I've been thinking about that. Okay. She's thinking about it. Anyway. I'm happy to tell you now. We can brainstorm. Okay.

I have ideas. We can figure out a way to make you comfortable. We'll brainstorm. I have ideas. We can figure out a way to make you comfortable. We'll brainstorm. She's thinking about it. I love the way you think. I'm the same way. You can always accommodate for anybody. You can figure it out.

Both of them. I've learned a lot. Go up. I hope you do it. The reason I really started thinking about it was because you sweet-talked me real good in that reply. Okay, so George Santos, which is a former U.S. No, not a former. Current U.S. congressman.

Well, he's about to be former. Botox Sephora. God. I love it. Ladies and gentlemen, let me about to be former. Botox Sephora. God. I love it. Ladies and gentlemen, let me start from the top. Okay. George Anthony Devalder Santos. Who is that?

A man by many names. Also known as Katara Ravosh, I believe, as a drag queen in Brazil. That's cool. Is a man of many names and has been a con man that has struck both the communities in Brazil and the communities in the United States of America and the Long Island, Staten Island, and Manhattan region. George Santos won a blue district, or a red district rather, or a blue district as a Republican and he became the U.S. representative for New York's third

congressional district, serving since 2023. And what he was serving was cunt. George Santos became very famous after his upset, his major upset victory, winning in a district that is

supposed to be going to a Democrat, unseating the third most powerful Democrat in New York politics. Which do you not love? Well, I love George Santos, regardless. Because he is a phenomenal character. Once he had won the seat, the opposition research,

which normally comes before you do an election, came out after he won the seat. Everyone found out that he had lied about being Jewish, lied about his, yes. Oh my God. To which he replied with, I'm not Jewish.

I've only said I'm Jew-ish. That is so funny. Said that his grand, said that his grandparents, said someone who did stand up, so that means a lot. That's so good. Yeah, his grand... Said that his grandparents... Said someone who did stand-up, so that means a lot. That's so good. Yeah, no, no. He's a Larry David character.

He's like the closest you can get to being... That is so funny. The closest you can get to being like in the Jewish universe as a Larry David character without being Jewish. I'm not Jewish. I'm Jewish. So really anti-Semitic a little bit. Claimed his grandparents escaped the Holocaust from Ukraine. So he was hitting every avenue. He was like, I'm Ukrainian,

I'm Jewish, like at a time when everyone was talking about Ukraine. Turns out he is not any of those things really. He was in Brazil. Claimed his mother died on 9-11. Mother did not die on 9-11. Then he tried to say his mother actually died due to 9-11 complications. Found out his mother wasn't even in America at the time. Lied about being a volleyball varsity champion. Lied about the college he went to.

Lied about the high school he went to. He lied about pretty much everything. We found out that he also was a drag queen in Brazil. Now, that would be normal and fine and cool and i still think it's cool except we also he's a republican at a time when everybody was saying you can't be a drag queen that means you're a pervert that means you're uh bleep you know interested in children we need to give his seat to pete davidson because his father did die in it's a brilliant solution to this problem. I agree. However, in spite of all these lies, George Santos refused to

stand down. He refused to resign. He said, I was elected to do a duty and that duty is serving cunt. I'm serving this district to the best of my abilities. Now, there's still a Senate or sorry, there's a Congress Ethics Committee

in the House of Representatives, and they conducted an investigation. There was a lot of, obviously, discrepancies in his campaign financing, and it turns out, oh boy, were there a lot of discrepancies. On October 21st, 2022, Redstone's bank account received a $25,000

wire from an account affiliated with Contributor 2 from there $25,000 was transferred from Redstone's account to Representative Santos'

personal checking account now this is a big no-no you can't take money from your campaign contributions wait so that was his Redstone's bank account wait

wait so he's running for student body president Redstone is like the campaign's bank account, right? And everybody gave him money for Pizza Fridays. But instead of buying Pizza Fridays, he then... He put it in his bank account and he bought... He put it in his bank account, yes.

He got OnlyFans Fridays. Or May Saturdays. What did he do with that? And he's like a doctor for Botox Sundays. Okay. What did he do with that? After the $50,000 from Redstone was deposited into Representative Santos' personal accounts,

the funds were used to, among other things, pay down personal credit card bills and other debt, make a $4,127 purchase at Hermes. That's incredible. And for smaller purchases at OnlyFans, Sephora, and for meals and for parking. Oh, God. Also, I love this.

He is so for the girls. He really is. 100%. And. Also, I love this. He is so for the girls. He really is. 100%. And he, what do you, you are a OnlyFans donator yourself. Really?

Look, I have purchased OnlyFans in the past. What and whom and what's the content? It's like porn. I've made purchases on OnlyFans in the past because I like to support

sex workers. And I also like... Dude, there's this Mormon girl that I grew up with that started an OnlyFans. And her OnlyFans is... She's probably changed the name. If she didn't, then shout out. Here's a shout out.

It was Holy Slut. Because she used to be Mormon. That's great. Yeah. Is it good? That's good branding. I subscribed as soon as I saw it and she pierced her nipples,

which I don't like pierced nipples because every time I see them I go yeah it's no longer enjoy I'm like that's not hot

it's just ouch yeah maybe guys can find them hot but like I feel it yeah I feel it and I wonder if they feel it I don't think

do you know I don't think they feel I have a couple friends that I forgot to ask it's fun it's like licking pennies I had a friend no not if the guys feel it if licking pennies. I had a friend. No, not if the guys feel it.

If the girls actively feel it. I had a friend with a nipple bar, and it got caught on something and ripped out. And she lost the bump part of it. They had to sew it down. And so she was like, you know how sometimes nipples can be like, you got a little baby toe kind of sometimes? Sometimes they're like flatter or whatever. I love nipples.

She had a little baby toe, like the kind that people, because you know you can get injections in your nipples now so it looks like you actually, so you have a bump because some people don't have a prominent bump. So you can get injections like Kylie Jenner so then when you wear no bra you can see the bump. Wow. Yeah. You mean when your nipples are hard? Yeah.

But yeah, you can make them like perma hard. Kylie Jenner got permanent hard nipples? I don't know. That is gossip. Wait, we should talk about the make them like perma hard. Kylie Jenner got permanent hard nipples. I don't know. That is gossip. Wait, we should talk about the Skims bra after. Yeah, but then, oh yeah, it's kind of like Skims bra. Anyway, and so then, so she has one. She had natural boobs. Yeah, and one because they got caught.

And now one is messed up. Okay, so I've never been really into nipple piercings in general. What were you saying about OnlyFans though? Why did I cut you off? The reason why we're talking about only fans is because George Santos purchased $4,000

worth of Only Fans and I was going to ask Austin to be honest for a moment and tell us how much you have spent on Only Fans. How much money I have spent on Only Fans. No, I'm cheap.

And we'll vote for you. I'm cheap. I'm not currently subscribed to anybody. I just have a bunch of free pages and I don't even use it really anymore. Wait, free pages? Well, look. I am unashamed about it. You just have a bunch of free pages, and I don't even use it really anymore that much. Wait, free pages?

Well, look, I am unashamed about it. You can follow people for free, I think. Yeah, I am unashamed about it. I have purchased OnlyFans subscriptions. I have stayed subscribed for months to certain people. I have paid for like- What's your total? I probably spent a few thousand bucks.

No, that's too much. That's too much. I probably spent like maybe a thousand. $10,000. No, a thousand total probably over the course of- $5,000. A few years, maybe. A few thousand? No, no's too much. That's too much. I probably spent like maybe $1,000. $10,000. No, $1,000 total probably over the course of a few years maybe. A few thousand? No, no, no. I mean, maybe I'm overshooting it, but $1,000 maybe.

$500 to $1,000, somewhere in that. Yeah, that sounds good. Yeah, I think probably that would be probably about $500 to $1,000. There's a clip from George Santos as well if you want to pull that up. Let's see what he had to say. Wait, this is after talking to him? Wait, that's George Santos? Oh, that's awesome.

That is George Santos on the right. Yeah, play it. Is he gay? Yeah. Oh, I didn't know. Is he openly gay? Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. I didn't know if he was openly gay. He also was married to a woman. That was another thing that people were suspicious about, too. He, like, said he was gay, but then. He's gay. Yeah, no, he is gay. Okay. Oh, he's definitely gay.

You'll see. Speaking of peel, is it true that you have an OnlyFans page and you can peel a banana with your feet? I don't have one. And it's, you know, I'll, I'll indulge you this. I just discovered what OnlyFans was about three weeks ago when it was brought up in a discussion in my office. What do you think?

And I was very, I was oblivious to the whole. Oh, come on, George. He's a good liar. No, he's not. He's just... What? I believe that. Yeah, me too. He looked like he was having a silly, goofy time.

He said that when? When did he say that? He was very calm. Oh, well, no, no, no. Oh, my God, here's Joe Santos in an interview with him. He's very good at lying. In March, his bank records show that he used campaign funds on OnlyFans

four months earlier to this interview. He said this in on OnlyFans four months earlier to this interview. He said this in March, though. Four months earlier to this interview. Oh, so he had known about OnlyFans and had spent four grand at least on campaign contributions. Do you think Botox helps you lie? Because you won't express as much.

Right? I'm a bad liar. It'll be more believable, maybe. I'm a bad liar. Me too. I'm the worst liar. In fact, Austin is not a bad liar. He's lying. I'm such a bad liar. It'll be more believable, maybe. I'm a bad liar. Me too. I'm the worst liar. In fact, I'm such a bad liar that when I'm telling the truth, I seem like I'm lying. Sometimes I feel like when I'm telling the truth that it seems like I'm lying.

I feel guilty. Because I'm the same way. I feel guilty all the time. I'm like, oh my God, I did it. But I didn't do it. But I did it. No, yeah. You know what I mean?

Guilty conscience. I feel so... I'm it. No, yeah. You know what I mean? Guilty conscience. Like I feel so I'm like kind of awkward sometimes. I know it's hard to believe but I'm Yeah, it's so hard to believe. I'm kind of awkward and I don't believe you at all.

I'm like kind of silly. I'm a bit of a silly goose sometimes. No, like I'm kind of like I'm a little socially like I'm kind of a klutz and that's hard to believe. You're so cute. You're quirky.

Like I was in the gym trying to look cool and I I was on my phone, and then I dropped it off my Stairmaster, and everybody looked. And then I fell off the Stairmaster. He's normal just like us. Yeah, he's one of us. And I'm still going to vote for you. Thank you so much.

And we're running for president together, actually. That's not how it works. Yeah, I'm a little awkward, a little silly, silly goose. I don't know where I was going with this. You're quirky. You're different. I'm a little quirky. works yeah i'm a little awkward uh a little silly silly goose yeah i don't know where i was going you're a little quirky yeah i'm a little different yeah i'm not that i'm not that abnormal though like on my day-to-day life right yeah like you're still like the other girls but you're like not like the other girls yeah yeah i get it i'm i'm not like as crazy as you would think like people i think people based on my clips from tiktok i don't think anyone thinks about you as much i put okay oh think I'm a psycho. Are your clips on TikTok?

I put... Oh, God. His TikTok is just... It's like... I love it. I have posted so many clips from here onto our TikTok. Mm-hmm. And they pop up. No, this is the only reason why he does the podcast.

Like, this is a TikTok fucking farm clip. I'm not surprised. Like, I could see TikTok fucking loving you. Yeah, they... You're great. They do... Oh, you're so sweet. You're so sweet.

Even though he's on... You know who else TikTok loves? You're so sweet. Yeah're so sweet. You know who else TikTok loves? Osama bin Laden. What? That's right. Why you got to ruin this moment? Why? Yeah.

Did you just compare me? What's up with that comparison, man? Did you just compare me to Osama bin Laden? We're not making Austin cry today, okay? Just saying. Did you just say that? Just saying. What?

Just saying. How did we go from everybody loves Austin on TikTok to you're... Do you know who else? You just... Osama... Pull it up, March. Pull it up. What?

Show it. No, show it. Osama bin Laden going viral on TikTok. Wait, what? Alongside Austin's show. Was it because he spoke against the genocide or something? No. Wrong tweet.

No politics. We don't have to talk about that. We don't have to talk about 9-11. Which many people are saying is kind of like Austin you're comparing me because I a long time ago I compared his

the way he looked as a child which was a tragedy by the way a tragedy I compared that to 9-11 in fact there's a clip we should run it what does that mean there's a clip on

well I didn't compare it to 9-11 but it was like it was a clip. We should run it. What does that mean? There's a clip on, well, I didn't compare it to 9-11, but it was like, it was a tragedy. He did. He did compare it. Hasan, you look like shit. He literally,

he literally said, it's not on my Twitter. It was, he said a tragedy. My God. I don't know. It was under, I don't know what account it was.

I don't know what's wrong with this guy. It was, but anyway, long story, so he wanted to throw that back at me. But look, I can say that about him

because he turned out to be, it's not mean because look how he turned out. You know what I mean? Yeah, I don't know. Right? But you're fine. Right? I'm not going to get canceled for this, right?

No. He's too hot for that to happen, right? If he was like a wreck. Just your wording was a little funny. Tragedy. No, he used those words. It was a joke. I'm obviously not serious, folks. It was a joke. You're fine. I'm not, it was a joke. He was a very funny tragedy no he used those words i'm obviously not serious folks i'm

not it was joke he his child he was a very good looking child what that very good looking that's weird very good looking wait why are you saying that when you were a kid you thought as a kid when you were both kids that he was good looking yes that's he's lying he's literally lying i didn't mean it like that all right next up on the docket we have really important news this combines two of the things that austin and cutie love uh taylor swift and also football a cruise no a cruise oh that's right a place to spread diseases and also friendship i love love friendship bracelet. He's gay. Of course he loves cruising.

Do you love cruises? I've never been on one. Pokey, I'm going on a birthday cruise. When? Literally right now. That's why we're doing this podcast on Thursday. Yeah, I'm going on a cruise in January. No, I'm not going.

I'm going on a cruise in January. I didn't want to do this podcast today because I'm going to see somebody in Florida oh that's even worse oh my someone that same

someone might have gotten that photo who knows maybe not if you're watching right now someone I hope you'll be

his valentine maybe did I help you I mean I don't know was that good it's a little early but we'll see a taylor swift theme cruise will set sail next year says the swift society which includes friendship bracelets

swapping sessions and trivia games which is the weirdest thing to fucking mention in a cruise like i feel like that's the least exciting part of a fucking we will not be going to barbados but we will be singing long live from the top of our lungs. But yeah, but like, why would, why is that the selling point? Oh my God, Taylor Swift is fucking 33 years old. Yeah, she turns 34 on the 12th of December, or 13th of December, sorry. Damn, nobody likes you when you're 34.

Okay, she could. What? That's a song, isn't it? Nobody likes you when you're 32? 23. Isn't that Taylor Swift? No. You know, that's kind of true.

What? I do think nobody really likes 23-year-olds. It's kind of an awkward age. Yeah. Wait, whose song is that? Blink-182. It's Blink-182. Why did I think it was Taylor Swift?

What the world? Because she has the song 22. Are you going to be 33 soon? Hey, I don't know. That's why I also thought. Next year. I'm not going to lie. Really?

Yeah. We are so close in age. It's kind of crazy. I'm 25, but he's 35. I actually don't know. That's why I also thought I'm not going to lie. Really? Yeah. We are so close in age. It's kind of crazy. I'm 25, but he's 35. I actually don't know how old you are. I don't know if you tell people. I'm 25.

Me too. We all lie about our ages. I don't. We're actually all 25. I don't. I'm 32 years old. I've never lied about my age. It's a privilege

not to lie about your age. I just want to make it publicly known that I will be lying about my age for the rest of my life. I think everyone knew that because you've given eight different ages over the course of the last eight episodes. What's the latest one? This is 25 just now. 25.

I just said I was 21. Yeah. He just turned to- I said, I'll name your price. I said I was celebrating my 21st. Yeah. He just crossed an important threshold in his life. Yeah.

21st. Only this past- Oh, 25 I can Only this past Sunday. I can now rent a car. Wait, how old are you? Wait a minute. You've been renting cars for how many years now? Because I had a AAA membership.

Oh, interesting. 27. 27. Happily. Well, you're 27? Yeah. 27. Which kind of freaks me out because I feel like I knew some of you guys when I was like 22. 27. Happily. Well, you're 27? Yeah. 27. Which kind of freaks me out

because I feel like I knew some of you guys when I was like 22, 21. Yeah, we've known each other longer. Yeah, this feels like a long time. Poki and I have been in this business for a long time. That's why I love you. I love Poki. She's one of my favorite people.

Seriously, like day one. She likes me. Did I see you at the first? No, the second TwitchCon I've ever been to. No, first TwitchCon. I waited in your meet and greet line at the first TwitchCon. And you're like, why did you wait in line? And I still ask.

Were you popping the first TwitchCon? Were you one of the top content creators? No. No, I was such a fan. No, I was such a fan that when I met a streamer that I watched a lot, I started crying. Who? Oh, my God.

Who? Leek it. Leek it. Who? None of you guys probably know him. Hethstone oh yeah his name's amaz yeah he just played hearthstone every day and i was a university student and i watched hearthstone every day yeah and i met him and i started i don't know i don't know what came over me i started crying that's crazy how fucking nerdy you guys all i used to get pictures too i used to get pictures of streamers too.

I used to get pictures of, I used to get so nervous to meet Soda Poppin. Soda Poppin. I used to get so nervous because he was so cute. The streamer. One time I got into the first TwitchCon, I went to get into an elevator

and Soda Poppin and Leah at the time were in the elevator and they got out of the elevator because I was in there. What? They like left the elevator because they felt uncomfortable with somebody else being in there. So they got out of the elevator. That doesn't sound like Soda. No, it was him. Did you smell bad?

No, I don't smell bad. Were you wearing the shirt? No. Were you wearing a shirt? I have never. I smell great. Don't you do? He's going to do the thing. He's going to do? No. Were you wearing a shirt? I have never. I smell great. Don't you do. He's going to do the thing.

Ew. He's going to do the thing. No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I would never do that. I would never do that to you. No, he smells great. You used my shampoo, I'm pretty sure.

No, I didn't even shower. You didn't? I washed my face and took a picture in your mirror. Okay, well then you used my cologne. I did. I changed my underwear. You used my cologne. I didn't use your cologne.

Yes, you did. No, I swear to Godologne What is the smell then? It's just my natural No it's not, you used my cologne That's my pheromone I just smell like vanilla No you used my Dolce & Gabbana Was that yours?

Was it sent to you for free? They stole it from Streamer Wars Well you didn't I got up there I did give it to you I got up there and I was like I'm gonna take I'm gonna take a shirtless picture

in Hassan's mirror I've never thought that well you've never been in his bathroom before you have taken shirtless photos in my house though I did technically

we did a nearly nude calendar yeah like a couple days ago yeah we did a nearly nude calendar right over here cause when you mentioned like some kind of nearly nude shoot

I was like what everyone has to do all of our guests have to do it sorry yeah nude calendar right over here. Because when you mentioned like some kind of nearly nude shoot, I was like, what? Everyone has to do it. All of our guests have to do it. Sorry. Yeah. Awesome. Sorry, Pogi.

It's time. What percentage of the proceeds do I get? Oh, this is... That's the awkward thing. We donate all the proceeds to charity. Don't say that. The charity of Austin's bank account. Yeah, yeah.

Austin thought he was going to make the big bucks. For Botox, OnlyFans, Hermes, and Sephora. I thought about Pogi. What do you think about me starting an only fans i think that's very slay of you if you wanna i'm thinking about it i'm thinking i would subscribe would you really yeah oh my god because you are you have like the physique of a greek god oh stop it under certain lighting under under hassan's lighting under hassan's lighting clearly wait can i hear more about this shoot? I'm so curious.

Yeah, so we did a nearly nude photo shoot. How nearly nude? I was mostly clothed. They were not. I mean... Wait, you should do a little... We all have photos where we're wearing Speedos only. I mean...

What's the thing that people... Mistletoe? A mistletoe. And then you cover it with the mistletoe. I mean, it was... That was a good one. That was a good one. We should have done that one.

Thank you, thank you. Yeah, we should have done that one. You should hit me up next time, just for ideation. We'll have you do a creative, creative project. You want to be in our Nearly Nude photo shoot next year? No, stop. Maybe I'll lick my hand. Hello.

What? So inappropriate to ask people that. You asked first. No, I didn't. I'm, I did. I was the one who, I didn't even ask. I told her she has to do it. It's just men.

You guys are, listen, I'm no longer the 21 year old you used to know. So we can be like, I'm all grown up. So she's in actually. Which charity, you know, the details. I gotta know the details.

So we were, we were mostly, like I, at one point, I was Miley Cyrus on a wrecking ball. Yeah, he was in panties.

And I was in like, white, like hip panties and I thought, he didn't like it. I thought everything was gonna fallies. And I was in like white, like hip panties. And I thought. He didn't like it. I thought everything was going to fall out. Yeah. Like I had to put a cup in there.

But it didn't. My butt cheeks were falling out. Damn, you were admitting you put a cup, huh? I put a cup on. I did not. Wait, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Should have. Hold on, hold on.

They were, I was doing it out of respect for our female makeup artist. Yeah, because otherwise they were see-through. Yeah, they were literally... You could see my head, which I did take a photo of in the bathroom. Dude, Jesus Christ. I let it hang. You let it hang? It was tight even without the cups.

It was a hard photo shoot. I would hope not, actually. But you didn't have... You could see everything on the white speedo that I was on Could you see look? Me I was on the wrecking ball. I was Marilyn Monroe with a pride flag Well did one as Michael Phelps.

So he was just in a Speedo and he had like the gold. Oh, okay. Cute. Hassan's best one is he's Bernie Sanders, but with no pants on. That's so good. Okay, the ideation is actually fire. Fourth of July won an America Speedo. Yeah, he was also September,

which I can't imagine what you think that was. And... He used the Twin Towers as a prop. Let's just say that. Oh, my God. I was February, but it's a bunch of clouds in front of my body. I was literally wearing clothes.

Beautiful. And he just put clouds in front of me. Don't lie. She was naked. I wasn't naked. She was naked. She was fully nude. Yeah, she was.

She walked around naked and bullied us the whole time. You guys should buy the calendar. She was bullying us while we were naked. She's like, yeah, you call that a dick, you fucking pussy? You guys got to sell that BTS. She's a monster. I wasn't. She's like, yeah, you fucking little dick. She's a monster. I wasn't. She's like, yeah, fucking little dick.

That's what she called me all day. You'd make such a good Dommy Mommy. Oh, I'm too tired to be a Dommy Mommy. I'm way too tired. Get some caffeine in you. Come on. I feel like I've hit her 20 times. You would be a good dominatrix.

I was going to say I'm used to it, but that sounds bad. I'm not used to it. I'm just tired. I'm so worn out. You got the dominatrix. I was going to say I'm used to it, but that sounds bad. I'm not used to it. I'm just tired. I'm just, I'm so worn out. You got the dominatrix fit on right now. I actually got a- Do you want to take a nap while we finish up? Yeah, I got a big cavity filled this morning.

You got a root canal? Almost. So as close as you can get to a root canal. They had to put like a fluoride cap inside of the tooth. Did you have to like go under it anyway? No, but they loaded me up. I'm barely getting filling back, actually. That's how bad it was.

I'm in a lot of pain, but anything for the podcast. A lot has happened to you recently. I've had a hard life. You're really good at being in pain, but not showing it. Thank you. She's brave. And beautiful. Women have a higher pain tolerance than men.

Is that true? Yeah, and oftentimes our problems go ignored in doctor's offices beautiful women have a higher pain tolerance than men yeah right is that is that true yeah and oftentimes our problems go ignored in doctor's offices because we either put on makeup and try to look nice or because we underestimate our own pain interesting i know that or because i think we're being dramatic and doctors are misogynistic no are you looking at me like i'm a local misogynist i'm just a regular massage I'm not even a doctor Maybe I got a doctor And a misogyny

On that note however We should probably move Beyond the paywall here We're going to the Patreon That's right The Patreon part of the episode If you would like to see that And many of the other

Juicy tidbits I feel like we didn't talk About pokey enough And I'm sad We're going to talk about pokey. We did. Wait, there's one last thing I can say, which I wanted to say in relation to you

not feeling any pain. What? And not showing it. Or sorry, feeling pain. She's pregnant! I'm actually, I've been having mad baby fever. It's bad.

You've never had baby fever? Fuck the time. Let's keep going. We'll still have enough for the Patreon. Behind the paywall. No, no, no, no. We're going to keep talking about it. Like, are you guys not experiencing had baby fever? Fuck the time. Let's keep going. We'll still have enough for the Patreon. Behind the paywall. No, no, no, no. We're going to keep talking about it. Like, are you guys not experiencing fucking baby fever?

Yes, we are. Shut up. Guys, we can go to 70 minutes. Five minutes. Anyone else feeling baby fever? Just me? Never once in my life. I want to get men pregnant.

Oh. If I could do that I would too yeah like I don't have baby fever but it's like it's something that I would it's more of a no keep going he has a breeding fetish

he is a king I don't want to like I just think the concept of getting i heard that too many times in a sexual setting i think it's it's sexy but anyway talk about your baby i think our i don't want to raise a child like yeah oh he's a we've established already i don't i think it's established fear and lord that also would be a terrible father i mean i'll be a great father from the time you'd be a fun father you'd be a great uncle like a

very fun uncle yeah i am an uncle i've got 11 nieces and nephews what yeah my yeah i got 11 if i had 11 nieces and nephews i probably wouldn't want a kid but anyway you have baby fever no uh that would that was not what i was gonna talk about i'm just saying i kind of do and babies are so cute they are cute but the girl boss in me is trying to freaking shove that do you want you that desire as far away as possible. My whole life, yes. But sometimes I'm like, maybe not. I have two wolves in me. One wants to be a stay-at-home housewife and one wants to conquer the world.

And I don't know which wolf defeats sometimes. You could do both. I'll see. I'm serious. You could do both. But what I was going to say is I... I don't know. I'm tired. In a couple weeks. But what I was going to say is I... I don't know. I'm tired.

In a couple weeks, I'm launching a podcast and I wanted you on it. You're one of the first guests I want on it. You're launching a podcast? It's a solo... I don't even want anyone on it. It's just me fucking yapping. But I wanted you on it because I know... It's called Don't Tell Anyone.

And I know you have so much shit you've probably never talked about. Oh my God. Yeah. I'm so excited yeah especially industry related stuff that would be crazy you're not asking we're right here but i mean you guys can have your episodes at some point in life are you interested i'm so crazy i would be there before you even asked like i'll invite myself okay but listen the premise at least for the beginning right now i'm talking the most shit so if you have something you want to talk about maybe something

you've never talked about yeah i'm ready to whine about it yeah but um especially i watched your interview with padilla padilla yeah i cried no i'll be honest i think i think cutie would be the best right because she will have so much so much i'm notoriously not good at talking shit about people no you don't have to talk shit about people. Just like about life. Life. A lot of people don't know everything. Oh, okay. No, there's just so many.

Actually. There's a lot of things that people don't know about me. Yeah. There's a lot of things that happen in the industry that you can't say at least right away. But like a few years later, you're like, fuck it. Did you know? Yeah, yeah. One sponsor on this house.

No, there's a lot of things that like, specifically of my personal life that I just don't tell people. Right. Yeah. Like this is nothing bad. I just I don't. I forgot the name again. Don't tell anyone. Don't tell anyone.

I love that. Thank you. I'm very I'm genuinely. Yes. I will go on your podcast and you will be my co-host for the Street Awards. I'll give you a half shake. Oh, close. Half just guarantees you on her podcast.

But but but you know we're still getting somewhere no I'll go on it I'm excited that's awesome that's very cool that's a great idea and I'd tell you if it sucked

I'm serious when is it if it sucks tell me off camera you can agree to this one in January I'm starting my late night show you'll come on my late night show

you know this whole podcast I was thinking you'd be such a good show host talk show host I have a show called The Austin Show like when you'd be such a good show host. Talk show host? I have a show called The Austin Show. Like when you were asking me. She's hosting a late night show.

When you were asking me about the cookies. I loved it. Yeah. I'm Jimmy Fallon. Yeah. I'll be on it. Cutie, thank you so much for the invite. We'll also be on the red carpet.

Are you going to have us on? You guys can do the red carpet. Yeah, but you guys aren't the hard ones. I'm going to be busy. You're not hard to like, she's hard. It's true. She's hard to get a hold of. She's hard to...

Well, I'm doing a roast series next year. Roast me? You want the roast of Pokimane? Just check Twitter. Okay. Yeah, we should roast Pokimane. She's like, no, respectfully. We should roast Poki

instead of roasting Hassan for the 100th time. Well, that was like the fifth ask of the podcast. You asked to host the stream rewards. He didn't ask for anything. Guys, you guys are actually, like, you're fun friends, and you're also incredible creators.

I'll fucking do whatever you want me to do. Thank you. Except for stream rewards. Hassan's like, he wants to get to the paywall so badly, I wouldn't let him. Are you going to slice me? What? No.

As a businesswoman, we can play any, like, you know, we play Wine About It ads at the stream rewards we could play how much tell me oh it's not in exchange yeah okay that might be fun that's a really good bargain businesswoman you that is awesome that is awesome speaking of promos uh what would you like to promote other than your cookies and your new podcast? That's it. And your new late night show. I told her. Her late night show.

I told her the late night show. Do you guys have anything to promote? I have nothing to promote. No, no. We are here to support you. We're promoting our Patreon. I'm here to support you guys on your shows. Oh, my God.

Hasan, when you did your charity thing, I think I donated 15 fucking K. Thank you. Whoa. Hell yeah. No, I think I donated 15 fucking K. Thank you. Whoa. Hell yeah. No, because I was like, no offense, Twitch news is sometimes so sad. Like you hear the shittiest thing about streamers.

And I'm like, finally, you know, a charity or something we can support and uplift. Nice job, Hassan. Good job. I don't think you hear that enough. Hassan's saving the world. You're so cute. I definitely don't. You're a enough. That song's saving the world. You're so cute. I definitely don't.

You're a special boy. You know that? I only hear negative things. Tragically special boy. Tragically special boy. All right. Well, on the paywalled portion, if you want to check that out, you should go to patreon.com slash for your and.

That's right. Patreon.com slash for your and. Yippee. What are you most thankful for, Koki? To be honest, when you asked that, the first thing that came to mind was I'm really thankful. Being on the Fear On podcast is fine. You say it.

I wish Will was here. Like, how fun. I know. Right? I didn't tell her. I mean, I love you guys, of course. But now I'm like, I need to come back for like the full, full experience. That's how we get you. That's how we get you. Yeah, this is the cost of a sample. I mean, I'm not far, of course, but now I'm like, I need to come back for like the full, full experience. That's how we get you.

That's how we get you. I mean, I'm not far from here. So happily, happily. The first thing that came to mind was I love those people who, because I'm not going to lie, I see so much dumb shit on Twitter. I see so many dumb motherfuckers on Twitter that don't even have a third brain cell to spare. And I don't have the time or mental wherewithal to respond to every single one so i love the people that do on my behalf and absolutely fucking dunk on them so i don't have dude i that's who i'm really grateful for