Fear& - Are we friends or co-workers?! | Fear&

Episode Date: August 10, 2026

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And we start kind of engaging, and I, a knock at the door. That sucks. A knock at the door. This is a nightmare. In the middle of everything. And I quickly get a robe and tuck it between my legs the best I can. And I waddle over to the door. And it's the front desk guy.

And it goes, Mr. Scholl, I'm very sorry to disturb you. But I managed to find some axle grease for a tractor we have. I found Zulub. And you know what he says? He hands it to me. He says, Don't ask where I got it. Oh my God, ew.

That was his personal loop. Yeah. They said, don't you ask where it came from. Wow. You should have invited him in. And they got the fucking looping. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. I suck you never ask. Three, two. Ladies. Welcome back to the fair end podcast. No, no, no, no, no. No. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to another.

episode of the Fear Air Podcast. A lot has changed. Hold on. You can't just come back and walk in here. This is no longer your intro. Yeah, I'm a boy now. What? Yeah.

You transitioned? Yeah. Cudy's been doing it. I've been doing, we've been doing the intros and quite frankly, the fans have said it's a lot better. No, I don't, I read the comments. That's actually what the comments are overwhelming and saying. I think we were deleting them so that you don't feel sensitive. No, I'm screening them.

I read the comments. Mm-hmm. even while I was overseas. Yeah, okay. I was reading them to see who missed me. That's crazy. Come on. You don't do that, guys?

Not one time. Not one time. I read them for you. That's so nice. I read them for you. When I was at rehab, Austin was like, seating. I should go to rehab. They would miss me so bad.

No, no, no. Every time I see those comments. People were like, the product is far better. It's far superior without Austin. Yeah. Can this be permanent? That was one I saw. Wait, hold on.

You're a good heel. Don't take this personally. Don't take a person. You always get nervous. You never know. You never know a day it goes down the wrong pipe. It says here, fear and fan. Beer and fan 79 says, the product is so much better with that Austin show.

Can this be permanent? Oh, my God. Wait. I have drama. You have drama? Well, before you get into drama, let me tell everybody something. Real quick. We're going on tour, ladies and gentlemen.

We are in multiple cities all across the West Coast. Seattle, Washington, Portland, Oregon, San Francisco, California, Los Angeles. Tickets are going quick and fast, which is the same thing. But you got to get him. That's the key. He's more quick than he is fast. That's right. I'm going to suck Hassan off live on stage in every city.

That's what's going to happen. Just kidding. That's a joke. But maybe you never know what can happen is life. I'm going to be Asian in some of the cities. Oh, that's right. Caroline Kwan is going to be joining us in some of the cities. Why would you tell?

I like her. I like her being. me by Asian. Okay, perfect. Anyway, just want to like you and more talented. Tour. Dotperian.com. tickets on sale. It took a few seconds to figure out what the fucking you. You were like, how are you doing that?

Just let me. Kitty, so what is your drama? This is my drama real quick. Okay. So I found out yesterday that the only like all this conversation about being my bridesmaid, right?

And the only person actually attending my wedding is Hassan. That's great. I Guess who has a cough No I'm not a cold But I had to deliver I'm not a cold, but I had to deliver the week

Look I My excuses I have to go to a family wedding Okay okay Now a lot of people are making fun of me About how Austin's gonna miss cutie's wedding Everything like that

And I was like I'm gonna show them And I'm gonna prove them wrong And I was on the flight Marath's wedding Yes Yes Cuddy's wedding Hold on

my best friend Joe's wedding. Hold on. So why are you like this? Hold on. Every other week you're like, oh, I'm in Wichita County. I'm like, what are you doing there? And you're like, well, I have a friend. It's a friend of a friend's third cousin.

He's getting married. I love going to different neighborhoods to go to random weddings. Well, you love weddings. Except for people who are closest to you. Every. I was on a plane and I was texting QD and I was like, well, she was asking me. She's like, what address can I send the RSVP to? And I said, well, I'm going to do that.

What is the date of the wedding? And she sends me the date. I don't know what I just said she sexed me. I texted him the date. I was naked and I wrote it on my body. Ancles around her ears. I said surprise. I wish I was that flexible.

Cooder, Max. Yeah. So I'm on the, I'm on the flight. And she sends me the date. And I went, oh my God, that is the one. day I am busy. What are you doing? Well, I can't. He has an event. I can't say, I can't say what the event is. Because then people would know when the sponsor, or when the wedding is. I have a very special event. I wish my wedding was sponsored. I have an event that I must attend. Yeah, it is it actually,

he has to go. I have to go. Yeah. That is on fucking. All right. Here's a question. Yeah. Are you going to let Christian go? Christian has to be with me. That's what I said too. What? He has to be with me. You'll understand. And then afterwards, I'm going to go to Spain, but that's different. That's different. That has nothing to do. Oh, my God. That has nothing.

You are a bad person. Hold on. Hold on. No, no, no. No, the wedding part is a, like if the Spain part is completely different. Yeah. Oh, my. That's the, that's after the wedding.

Yeah. The Spain is after the wedding. Yeah. After his crime of tweeting. Hold on. Spain is after the wedding. He's going to celebrate with a Spain trip. Kitty, let me be clear.

Uh-huh. Let me be clear. I want to be very clear here. the event is why I'm missing your wedding Spain I would be able to do after the wedding Anyway, you would go to Spain anyway No, I probably wouldn't go to Spain if it wasn't for the event That is insane bro

That is Look for those of you who are watching I promise you It's I have to go He has to go He has to go He has to go you guys I promise he does

I promise you I have to go And in my defense I have to go And QD he understands And so she understands Tell him you understand I understand She understood. I said instantly I understood.

So that's why I have to miss it. I'm a bad person. I'm a bad person? It's just one wedding. I'm sorry. Yeah. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.

I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. The event that you're going to. How much money? I can't talk about money. He can't talk about it. No. No.

It's okay. This is the idea. He's not getting paid for the event. What? Yes, he is. Don't lie to him. He has work. He has work.

He's got to work. I am working for once in my life. I have a really good solution. What's that? All the money that you get from the sponsorship, you gift to the charity of Cuddy's choice. I'm already taking Cuddy and Ludwig out to a beautiful dinner. Yeah.

We're going with Mara and his wife. This is what he does. Well, if you can't make the wedding a dinner. It is kind of funny. You ran the exact same playbook with him. He did. Yeah,

he did. He did. He did. Take a lot for dinner. But that was after the, I missed the wedding tragically at the last second, which it was pre-complish. This is pre-planned.

I'm going to take her. You did not have COVID during Mara's wedding. Christian had COVID. Christian had... And by proxy, I could have had COVID. And Austin was going to be a super spreader. I could have killed your whole family. It's right.

I could have walked in there and murdered and massacre. Why did you go to a party that weekend? I love your mother. Why did you go to a different part of that weekend then? I didn't go to another party. I didn't go to a party that week. Clearly, he's just lying. He's lying for clicks.

I don't know what you're talking about. You're destroying homosexuals. He's lying. Lying for... Anyway, Tudy, I am going to take you and Ludwig out to a fabulous five-star restaurant. I don't know what that is. I'm thrilled. I'm going to do it.

And I told her, I said, I'm serious about it, too. I'm not going to just, this is not a thing that I'm going to just forget about. Phone in, Willie, Nilly. No, this is a big thing. No, we're going to go to dinner. We're going to get a seafood tower somewhere. Yeah. Run up the bill.

Anyway, I. $1,000 a plate. I am back from my gaycation. How was it? And concentrate. And I did. did go to a concentration camp. Correct.

And I learned a lot. You went to the concentration camp. Yes, I did. And you did not take any selfies. Did not take any photos? No photographs. No photographs whatsoever. Right. So it's like, did I even go?

This was in between going to numerous gay events. You went to like, you went, you partied. Yes. And then, you fed your soul. Yes. And then you fed your mind. Yes. And you brought your twinks with you to the concentration.

Well, they're not my twinks. They're my, we, Christian and I travel with a couple. Uh-huh. And we went to Sachshausen, and we walked a long ways from the train. That's got to be a heavy experience. You know, it was heavy, and I learned a lot about some things that I didn't even know. And I'm a history buff, and I learned a lot about the concentration camp. Number one, the thing that I was shocked by, well, first of all, it was a very sad experience from top to bottom.

Somber. You walk in, and you walk through the gates. Yeah. And you get into the camp and you go through the museum. and I learned a lot about the homosexuals that were castrated. Oh, okay. I was, well, I was going to ask you a question, but I'll keep, I'll hold it. So anyway, I learned a lot.

Like, gay people were murdered in these concentration camps, too. A ton of, ton of, they were castrated? Yeah. So what the Nazis would do, and I've read some of these stories, but one of the things that they would do is they would remove the balls of gay people. And in some instances, would put them in a jar. Oh, my God. Show them their balls.

In the jar and say something horrific, like they would call them a faggot. Oh, my God. Yeah. One of the things that I learned that was interesting is the USSR liberated the camp in 1945. That's right. Oh, you finally recognize it. Well, I recognize it. You finally recognize it.

One thing I didn't know about the Soviets, though, is they fucking looked at that camp and they fired that motherfucker back up again and just kept killing. What? Yeah, they did. To be fair. No, they just kept going. They kept it rolling. They said this is.

No, I know they killed a lot of Nazis, but what the camp taught me is they were just kind of throwing anybody in. They weren't really, there was no justice really for, I mean, mostly Nazis. It was mostly Nazis. The Soviets were far, far more ruthless to the Nazis. And they would literally put them back in the concentration camps, right? Immediately. They were like, okay, it's your turn now. Yeah, yeah.

Now, it kind of makes a little bit more sense because like the Soviet army was comprised, not entirely, but like there were a lot of Jews in the Soviets and the Eastern flank and the Eastern Front that joined. And so there was definitely, and they were the ones who actually encountered the camps. At this point, they probably would have encountered some other camps by now. And there was more of an attitude, an appetite for revenge, let's say. In the Western flank, they didn't actually encounter the camps until much later. So they, you know, they didn't, fully know about it. The government knew about it. I believe the British intelligence had information about what was going on inside this camps, but like some people didn't believe it.

They used this camp Saxhausen as a camp to like, as a PR camp. Like they would bring in foreign dignitaries and they would give them tours of the camp, but they would not show them like the, I think there's also one, Therazenstadt is the other. Tarzansta. Yeah, but they, no, they would basically show off like the, the work parts of the camp. It made it seem like a camp that was like forced like. And Tracy Sotom. It's a, yeah,

it's a sanitized version of the concentration camps in an effort to show the Red Cross and also investigators to say like are these are just simply prisons. Yeah. To get them off. They're back. Anyway, it was. It was horrific. What I saw was absolutely horrific and bone chilling.

And I mean, we went to the, we went to a lot of the facilities and saw like what was what they had done. And it was just. I mean, just makes the hair stand up on the back of my back. So you went from that to partying back. Well, now, I mean, we did do that afterwards. Not the same day.

Oh, you see? There's a one. No, because we went to Berlin Pride. Some time between that. We went to Berlin Pride and we had a fantastic time. Other than the terror attack. There was a terrorist attack. Yeah, I like that you came in hot with the, we went to the concentration camp and not the fact

that you almost were a part of a terror attack. Well, yeah, Christian and I were in Berlin at the same moment when there was a terrorist attack there was a gentleman drove a well not a gentleman kind of an asshole really when you think about it so a van I mean I don't know I mean that's fair to say

it's a dick right no yes yes he's a piece of shit right so he drove a van he drove a crowd of people and so Christian and I were in our hotel we were getting ready and all of a sudden which is what police cars sound like in German

and they all started just collecting on Potsdamer plots, which is where we were, and they were all just there. And I was like, what the fuck is going on? What the hell is going on? I was doing Christian, what the fuck is going on? So I called down to the front desk. I said, what is going on?

We're going to need some free champagne because of this just too. No, I said, what is going on? And they said, sir, we have no idea. So I hung up and I called back a couple minutes and said, you know what's going on? And they said, sir, there's been a terrorist attack. Oh, my God. And I said, oh my God.

Oh, my God. What do we do? And they're like, just stay there. And I was like, okay, great. What do we do? So the news media came in and our friends were over because they were, they were like, there were cops running with AR-15s and everything like that. So we basically were, you know, it was really sad and so I got back to drinking.

So we. You were like, the night's still young. We got a party. We did. We went out. And you know why we went out? Because otherwise the terrorists win. Yeah.

That's literally America That's what Georgia B. Bush said after now No, no, no, but like they are trying to scare us. They're trying to intimidate our way of life And we are going to work we're gonna start out. I agree with that. Look, I was a little scared, not gonna lie. Yeah, but I got in a fucking car, a taxi

And I went Straight to the club. Far away. No, I mean, it was a little on the outskirts of town But it was a great, we had it was a ticketed club event Anyway, we did that. It was a very, I mean, obviously it was a horrific, you know, thing that happened.

And we went and we paid respects. There was a memorial in Berlin that we went to. But yeah, and then, I'm sorry, I feel like I'm talking the whole time because I was just like on this. You love it. Anyway, I do have a story about the hotel that I stayed at in Berlin. Oh. Hey, I got to tell you guys something. What?

I'm going to Portola. Really? Yeah. What are you doing there? It's a festival. It's great. It's in San Francisco. Wow.

What are you going to see there? Oh, so much cool stuff. I'm going to see Dog Blood, which is Scrillix. Great. I'm going to see a bunch of other people, but you know where I got those tickets? Where? Seat Geek. Seat Geek.

That's right. Well, I love Seekeekeek because I heard there's more than 70,000 events listed on it. There is. There's so many events listed on Ziki. Concerts, sports, festivals, just like the one you're going to. Every time I want to go to an event. I like Lady Gaga. You seat geek. Thank you.

You like Lady Gaga? I love Lady Gaga too. And you know who I also love? Nickelback. Really? Yep. And I found their tickets on Seat Geek. That's awesome.

Standing line, the clubs are never getting. It's like the bottom of the... No. All right. Well, I'm going to get that ticket on Seatkeek. I'm sure you will. Yeah. All right.

Well, the new year means new artists are on tour. To make it even better, you could use Code Fear 10 for 10% off your seat geek tickets. That's 10% of. Tickets with promo code Fear 10. Isn't that right? Aza. Let's get to the important stuff. It's a fantastic time at this hotel that I stayed at in Berlin. It was the Ritzkarl Timberlin. Fantastic. And the service was tremendous. One evening, I was going to have sex. And, congratulations. Gay sex, you need lubricant. Correct. And I didn't have any. So I went down to the front of oil. Yeah, I went down. No, I went down to. the front desk and I said, is there a convenience store

open nearby? And I said, sir, what do you need? And I said, well, I was embarrassed but I was like, fuck it, I'm in Berlin. These people don't know me. That's crazy. So I said, do you have lubricant? And I said, of course. I said, sir, there's one in the amenity kit in your room. That's amazing. That's the most

German shit. And I said, It comes with dental floors, nail clippers, unash and lubin. Yeah. So I'm sorry, I said, do not use the nail clippers on your asshole. I went. Do you think this is Munich?

Why in Berlin? We're not animals. So the boy is over there. Like, the boy is on his way. So I'm calling, you know, I went to the room and I went, I went into, what boy? The twink. The guy that was coming over, of course, in Berlin, right? He called him the boy.

He's not what you think I'm going to have sex with, the air? The sex boy. Right? So anyway. So anyway. Bring in the sex boy! He's on his way over. The sex boy is ready with the loop.

So I get into the room and I went into the mini bar and the sex kit's not there. Oh. And so I called down and I say the sex kid's not there. Yeah. And they go, oh, sir, I'm very sorry. This is an oversight. We'll call you back. Right?

And they call me back a few minutes later. Is the rubber fist there? Oh, we've been pillaged. So we, so I go and I bring in Shillade a horse. They call me back. And they said, so, we're very sorry. we are looking everywhere in all the rooms like all the rooms are vacant rooms

you're looking for a kid you understand it's pride lupis was smores and gold right now so they they look everywhere and I'm like they call me back again this is so embarrassing and they say so if we cannot find anything we've sent somebody to the convenience store so they sent staff to the convenience store

and I'm like okay Austin didn't you do this in both China and Japan meanwhile the boy is over at the place. Stop calling him the boy. Say the guy. He's 25 years old. I know.

I know. He's a man. The man was over at the room. Right? What? So he's just waiting. The elderly hole. So wait, wait.

So he is just sitting there and he's like, well, yes. Van are you going to put it in? I had to tell him. I had to be transparent and up front with him that we were waiting for Loub. Okay.

Was he German? Yeah, he was German. And so. So anyway, so we, we, we, uh, they keep calling back and they, after they get to the comedies, they're like, so sorry, Mr. Schaub, we do not have. Yeah. Because it's pride in Berlin. Of course.

And I'm like, you should have brought your own. And so I go, well, I guess we're just going to have to make do. And, um, so I was just like, I guess we'll just do oral, I guess. And we start kind of engaging. And I. a knock at the door. That sucks. A knock at the door.

This is nightmare. In the middle of everything. And I quickly get a robe and tuck it between my legs the best I can and I waddle over to the door. And it's the front desk guy. It goes, Mr. Show. I'm very sorry to disturb you. But I managed to find some axle grease for a tractor we have. I found Zulub.

And you know what he says? He hands it to me. He says, don't ask where I got it. Oh my God, ew. That was his personal loop. Yeah. He said, don't you ask for it came from. Wow.

You should have invited him in. And they got the fucking looping. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I suck it never had. Anyway, that was my, that was one of my. Oh, you have a premium sex boy in here.

So anyway, that was. Oh, very nice. Wow. That was the loop. And, yeah. The other embarrassing thing that happened to me is, you're going to find this funny. I was making out with a guy at a club in the Netherlands. Sure.

And he makes out with me. And afterwards he goes, he was Dutch and he had a thick accent. But I heard him, he's like, this must be Euro summer. And I was like, what? I was like, I don't get it. But he was referencing Zara Larson. Oh, okay, okay. And I felt like I aged myself tremendously.

I just know Zara Larson is endorsing Abdullah, that's the only thing I know about her. That was a fun trip. I missed you so much while you were gone. And that terror attack scared me because I thought I was going to lose my co-host and my friends. So this is a gift from the island. But this gift is a two-parter. Okay. What is it?

Well, what do you see there? It's a plane. It's a plane. David? Bring in the second part of the gift. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. What could it be?

Do you get me a plane? It's a little Oh wow A second plane has hit the studio Oh That's an It says Neo on the base That means that's an Airbus

Oh my God What is this? That's correct That's an A321 Neo That is a remote control A321 Neo Oh it's an A320 Neo It flies, Austin

It's an airbus God What? I ride airbuses What? David built it for you, by the way. What the fuck? This is incredible, Will?

I know. It's pretty awesome. This is fucking awesome. Oh my God. It's got everything. Oh, my God. Will, that's amazing. It flies, too.

That's incredible. Motorized landing gear. What the fuck? He's never taking this home. I'll fly at home. I think it's one. Next to your airplane. I think it's one 30th scale is what it is.

Yeah. This is incredible. Oh. Working fly. All of it. Wow. That's amazing. Thank you.

Wow. David built this. Just don't fly away anymore. No, I will. My sweet boy. That's so sweet. But you didn't just get this for him. Well, I thought we could take you to a park and you and Marat as a part of your challenge could have a day of flight training against each other.

Oh, fuck yeah. Fun. As a, and that's my gift to you. As a sweet treat. A stream. And then, but what's the end of the challenge? If Marat wins,

is that I thought that was gonna. Well, you tell him. If Marat wins, the flight challenge and is capable of landing him better than you and capable of maneuvering better than you, he gets to choose the challenge rather than

if you win, you get to do your simulation. Okay. And you might have to become a pilot. Okay. All right. deal so if morin says like he wants to do dog fighting after winning this challenge i think you might beat him on the remote control though well it is probably more similar to an airbus it's it's pretty neat isn't it marat told me he was afraid of dog look at how cool it looks in the frame so we this is awesome

so we'll purchase this and we didn't realize at the time when will first purchases that this is like a massive hobby for a lot of people no I know. So what's interesting about it is the plane comes separate than the remote. Yep. So Dave had to go and scout out a adequate remote for this thing that is totally separate on it. You can put a small camera on it. It's the only way I guess.

But, but yeah, that's amazing. Yeah. Will, thank you so much. No worries, buddy. This is incredible. I thought it would be a lot of great content. This is a really bad time. Oh.

Just tell you all that I got you gifts. and I left them all in Europe. I lost in. We have one tradition. When you go out of town, you bring everybody gifts. I had a butler and he forgot to pass it. Don't blame the butler.

Don't blame the butler. I brought everybody sticky socks when I came back. I did. I'm so sorry. Look, I have. Oh. I had a butler in one of my hotels. That's incredible.

Thank you. Have you tested it, David? No. Is it cool? Oh, you tested it? I did not get it off the ground. Oh, really? Wow.

That's incredible. Thank you. No worries. I don't know how I'm going to get that home, so I'll have to store it at your house. I hope you understand. I hope you're okay with that, Hassan. Put it in the bathroom. Maybe have a say.

I don't have. I think he's going to need one of your rooms for his place. Yeah. I think I think I'll have to store it. You have very little say over your own house. Well, excuse me, your primary bedroom is much better, I think, to host that. Anyway, sorry for the inconvenience, but I have been gone for a few weeks, so in my defense, I haven't been here to bother you. And you also are staying in Piker de la Casa.

Oh, you are today? Are you gaming tomorrow? Yes, I am. No, I'm going to fly home before I don't make it. What gifts did you get us? Well, I got, I can't tell you. Well, I actually, one of them coming. You left them in Europe.

One of them made it. One of them made it. Who's a gift? It's It's not with me though I don't have it with me So you forgot the packet twice So you still forgot the packet twice

So you still forgot the pack one Is it Butler and Portland I'll be honest with you guys It was it was boring shit like trinkets and stuff like that like I love trinkets I know like I love Amsterdam and stuff like that Yeah okay exciting And yeah I don't want that

I mean I tried to bring back food for you Why would I want that? Because you're a chef. Wait. Baker. What? Baker's your baker. Okay.

Yeah. He forgot your occupation. It's been so long. No, no, no. Anyway, regardless, I love you all. And I feel so refreshed after vacation, so much so that we planned another vacation while I was overseas. Well, I told you about Spain, but that'll be after. I can't even remember.

We're going to have to, I don't want to freak out the fear in the audience, but at some point we're going to have to bulk record because of wedding. Yeah, we can do that. Wait, what do you mean? Why? How long are you gone for a wedding? A little bit. What the fuck? Well, I know I'm out of PTO. Okay.

We'll figure it out. What the fuck? But I've been thinking, what if we double my PTO? What are you guys? What are you guys? So I'm bringing nothing to the table. It's like the meme. I want to offer you nothing for more PTA.

I think what we did. you guys think? I think we can just figure it out. Yeah, I think we can figure it out. We'll just figure it out. You guys, listen, we'll do some, we'll do, uh, oh, none of you will be at the wedding. Never run. Husson and I will do a wedding episode. Yeah, I love that. We'll be good. Yeah, we'll do a wedding episode. It'll be great. With coworker wing? He won't be in it. He doesn't know you. It is funny that my only, uh, podcast co-host that's going is the co-worker one. I mean, look, I would have, I would have. I would have love to be at the wedding. I really would have. I know you all would have. I would, you know, you know,

I was devastated. Dude, the moment when Caroline and I realized that she couldn't be there was so funny. What did she say? Because I was having like a Caroline and I were in like San Francisco and I was having a fucking like comedically awful day. Like it was like, bam, pan, like I was getting hit from every side. And then and then I'm like, I said something to her and I was like, yeah, it's okay. You know, I said something like, at least I'll have you.

Yeah, I said, I said, I said something like, I was like, well, at least you'll be a my bridesmaid or something. Like I said something like that. And then she's like, yeah. And we go to dinner. And then she gets a text and she goes, oh, no. And I go, what? She's like, someone in my family's getting married that same day. And I was like, I just started dying laughing.

It was so funny. I had a similar experience when we were texting. I went, oh, fuck. Yeah. And you knew what it was coming. Yeah, it's fine. But she's my honorary bridesmaid. Look, I will be.

You know what I can do? I'll zoom in. No. Oh, no. Husson, sure. Hassan can hold the phone. That's crazy. Husson, you have a role at the wedding.

You can hold my phone. I'll be there. Yes, I'm a bridesmaid. Replacing Caroline Kwan. I have bridesmaid drama. I picked out six different colored dresses. Okay. And then the problem is, and my one friend who's really good, she's been a bridesmaid like 100 times because she's everybody's friend.

But she told me she was like, you can't let people pick out their own color. You need to just assign colors. Oh, 100%. Yeah. I didn't do that. I told you. We had a conversation about that. I fucked up.

And then instead I sent all six colors to the girls and I said, Circle, your two favorite. Thinking that the math would math, it didn't math and everyone chose the same color and now I don't know what to do.

And then I said circle a second one and then they all chase the same second one. Cudy. But if they all chose the same color, you're fine. No, I'm doing different colors. But you don't have to.

No, it would be beautiful. Wait, Kitty, cutie. Baby, baby, baby. You have so much you have to worry about. All the girls chose this. same color.

Just let them wear the same color. Isn't that what brides just want to do? I thought they're supposed to wear the same thing. I know, but she wants to do different colors, guys. And as the bride's me, kidding. I'm going to show you. No, no, no, no.

Cudie is one of the bridesmaids. I agree with you. I agree with your decision. As one of the bridesmaids, and if you want me to wear a specific color, I can wear dusty rose. Sure, I would love to wear dusty rose. No, that'll be beautiful.

I don't want them all in maroon. Ew, yuck. You're going to have to have so many. like things. It's just going to add so much stress that you don't need to. He's wrong. It's going to be beautiful in a single color. He's wrong. It's going to look so uniform. It's your special day. You can do what you want.

Kitty, I think they should go naked. You have to worry about so many things. You don't want to, for the next month. Pues are no pews. Be wild. Asking people what color they're going to wear. One already took one of the colors I needed. One took another color. Now I have two

ugly colors and two pretty colors. Listen to me. Okay, I'm going to show you. You do you. You do you. I believe in you. He's trying to advocate to be right. Yeah, I know.

And I am going to be... He just wants to be a bridesmaid. He doesn't give a fuck. I'm going to be the prettiest bridesmaid there. Don't listen to him. I'm going to show off on all of these bitches. He's going to show up your wedding. He's going to show up to your wedding and a mouth seat.

Shut the fuck off. Gave which discurter are logged in to. Hey, my name's Will Neff and I'm going to be selling ration buckets for the end of the world. When the end comes and there zombies walk in the earth and heathen. and sodomites have taken over the surface world, you're going to have a Will Neff ration bucket. It got split pea. It got meatloaf.

He got everything you need to preach the gospel in your bunker. But where can you buy it? You can buy it on Shopify, because that's where I list Will Neff Survival crossover Jesus loving products. And you can too. If you have a product, you got to go to Shopify. That's right. Don't live with what ifs.

Cheching, make some money like me, baby, cash in on the rapture or whatever your beat is, whatever it is, you can list it on Shopify. Right now you can sign up for $1 per month. It's a trial at Shopify.com slash fear. Go to Shopify.com slash fear. That's Shopify.com slash feel. Beautiful. What a stunning group of gals.

I would look so good in the same. second one. You wouldn't fit in any of these dresses. None of my friends chose that one. See, I like the color. I'm a bridesmaid. You can show up in that dress, this song. Always a bridesmaid, never a bride, but now not even a bridesmaid. So which color did everybody choose? Everyone shows the brown and the maroon in the middle. Do you think they chose that because of the cut of the dress? No, no, no, because they can choose any cut. It's right, but subconsciously this may be. The cut of that middle dress is much more funny. I know it's stunning. Yeah, maybe. Maybe that's what happened. I like the, I like the

leg. You're so gay. I'm the, okay. Fuck you. All right. I'm trying to help. Hey, hold on. What's wrong with being gay?

Shut up. He just. Both of you, shut up. For one fucking second. Just shut up. Hazan, if he's gay, we should accept him. I'm trying to help with her fucking wedding.

You should accept him for, I accept you for who you are. He just wants to be a bridesmaid. You're, especially with your painted nails. You're going to look good and top. Which by the way Will, I'm not going to get you got hate from the other day. I'll be honestly, I'm gay and I'd probably

call you a f*** with a guy. Golly. He pulled out the Stanley I'm taking it from all angles. You look like a drag queen out of drag. Yeah, you do. You pulled out

the Stanley Tucci out of nowhere, like his fucking Stanley Tucci's straight. No, but in the, in Devil Wears probably. Anyway, second movie was a disaster by the way. Do you hate when I do this, right? No, I kind of like it. Do you?

He hates it. I stick my foot through the little thing at the bottom of our chair and I touch his legs. He plays, she plays foot. How often do you do this? Like, every half is such dead ass. Why? Because I'm usually straddling an edge. Yeah.

God bless you. Are you sick? She plays up with my calf. I don't mean to. I honestly, it's okay. Do I always move? Yeah, no, it's fine. My feet are always covered.

I'm not bear it. I'm not bear on him. Oh, I'm not raw. I'm not raw dog and I'm not raw. I'm not raw. I'm not bare on him. My feet are usually wrapped up.

Yeah, you don't get to bear. You don't get to bear. That's my laugh when I hear something funny. Wait, y'all are out of control today. What? Every other time you're picking it.

Which is so sad because you know what I saw the other day on TikTok? I saw this group of guy friends. This girl It was full barren. Girl posted like are your guys really your friends if they don't do this at your wedding? And I almost sent it to you guys and then I realized none of you are coming. Well, kitty.

Wait, let me see the TikTok. Okay. Let me see the TikTok. You can do this alone, I guess. I want to be at the wedding. I do. I thought about it. Kind of feels like you want to be in Spain.

Can you move it to a Spain? I can't move it. I don't, no, no. Guys, I want to make it clear. Hassan's going to twist and contort. This is what he does. I'm not going to be in Spain during the wedding. I'm going after.

The day after. No, a few days after. Yeah, it just happened to be the same time. It's going to be a spagna. See, I need a practicade, okay? They're gay by Sunday, too. Dios me, oh, man. It's going to be really funny when we find out that his event opportunity is not even on the day of the wedding and he's just going to be in Spain.

Oh, I'm not. I totally misunderstood. When Ethan's Gruzman went off at our wedding, let's see. Oh, let's see. All world you long to see Then join in the fight That will give you the right to be free Is this a

Is this a gay? No. Guys, it's lay men. Right. We know where the song is from. Yeah, but none of you know the song And I've tried to sing it as a group so many times. It's a, it's a...

Oh, I am not singing anywhere around. your ass any longer. Why? You weren't there. That clip that didn't make it was maybe the funniest thing it's ever happened. You weren't there. Don't worry about it. We had our karaoke episode last week.

What? Without me? I love to say. It got caught because the computer crash. That's okay. It happens to the best. Well, I had a song. I was listen.

Okay, you guys don't listen. She did a mean girl's thing. Shut up. So anyway. So we go into that, we're doing the Patreon episode. And I was like, guys, awesome's not here.

Let's do the karaoke episode. Because obviously you're not here. Of course. I'm not here. It's funny to leave you out. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, exactly. Because I love to be in movies.

And then, and then Hassan's like, I hate the Kauoki episode. And then we're like, there's one song you like singing and who's like, yeah, like, my Chinese songs. Yeah, right song. And I was like, oh, my God, please get something out. Get real. I didn't say that out loud, but I thought it. Yeah. And then he was like, he was like, oh, there's a song that Alex sings and he really wants to be like Alexa.

Sorry, it was Lexa. Alex and Alex, I'm going to mix up. It was like, there's a song of Lexa sings and you know how much he loves Lexa. He always talks about. And so he was like, I bet I could sing that song. And then he plays Alexa singing a little bit. He's like, yeah, I could sing that song. And I said, okay, bring him the karaoke.

So we bring up the karaoke. He starts singing it. Like three minutes go by. He sings the whole thing. Me and Will, we like, we're like, yeah, good job. And then the song ends. And he's like, he's like, okay, I'm shy. I'm shy.

And then he goes to me and he's like, what song are you going to sing? And I said, I don't really feel like karaoke anymore. That's awesome. That is awesome. I was sobbing. I was laughing. I was laughing.

You could identify the exact moment. His heart broke. So Izan, you didn't really do a great job. did you? No, he did a good job. I'm not trying to get flamed again. He did a good job. He did a good job. I think you've got a lot of strengths, one being that you're a fantastic political commentator. Yeah? That I condemn. I don't know you. Get it out of the way. I make it very public. I do not know yet. I disavow. Which, yeah, anyway. But yeah, but yeah, no, you've got a lot of strengths and you're beautiful and but singing isn't one of them. I've the wedding gift to me that I want

from you guys is to learn this song. Okay, we'll do that. Does it have to be Les Mis? Can we see something good? No, I want Lima so bad. And I want a part in it and Carolyn can be the other girl and Christian can be in because you guys need a few more boys. Yeah, I will do that. Okay, so you want Le Ms. I want you to sing it. I want you to sing it. I want you to want you to want to do it. I actually don't care if you want to do it. I want you to do it. I want you to do it. I want you to do it. I want you to do it. Okay, we'll do it. We'll surprise you one day with it. I got him a plane. I know, but you guys won't do it because you have to practice and stuff. No. Okay.

Come on, Hassan would be good as the one guy that comes in with a deep voice. Come on, Assad, you can do it. Are you going to stay at my house when you come to Portland? No. Okay. Why not? I have a room for you. I got a bigger bed for you. Oh, I'm sorry, we're staying at the Ritz. The service is excellent. I heard the butler. I'll be honest. I'm gonna forget my little drink.

If you guys, well, if you guys stay at the reds, I may just do that too. That's pretty great. I don't want to be left out. That'd be horrible. Don't leave them out. Be alone at my house. No, I'm gonna stay at your house. Okay, okay, okay.

I prepare everything. You've been so excited. I've been so excited. My mom is getting, my mom is getting everything ready for you. I'm excited. I'm excited. You know, thank you. Oh, that's so.

I'm excited. I'm so tickled. Over my dead body, dude. Come on, Asan, don't be a millennial gray. Rude. Business decorations are on all year long. No, no, I don't have those up anymore. Leave him alone.

Thank you. Speaking of which, there was a video that was supposed to be played last week that I was supposed to deliver a message to you guys while I was on vacation. And I thought we could play it right now. What happened? I don't know. It just didn't get played for some reason.

It happens. So, Gabe, it's in your DMs there. Right there. I can just clear. It's me. on vacation naked in the sex bathroom? Well, let's see what... I don't remember what I said.

I was... Hey, Fierand podcast. It's me, Austin Show, and I am currently here on vacation in Amsterdam, and I'm drinking a beautiful glass of champagne. I'm sure you guys are filming the podcast right now. I just want to say, I miss you. Look at this beautiful view.

My God. Wow, there's the canals of Amsterdam. Look at these people. I have no idea who they are. Cheers to all of you. I'll be back in one short week. and happy pride. This is what you sent us.

It reads like a cameo. It reads like we paid you to send us. Engelbert Humperdick put more effort. It reads like, you're like, I'm seeing here that this is a message to fear and you're doing a torso. It's also crazy that you sent it to us and then you had us watch it now. You're here.

Well, I know, but I can't let the video go to waste. Austin, that is insane. Englebert Humperdink is 850 years old And he did a better job with this fucking cameo. Did that not read like it was off that thing? No. You couldn't even flex on us. No.

You couldn't even flex on us appropriately. It felt like you did everything short of put a ringlight up before you started recording. That's right. I'm in Amsterdam. It's beautiful. Just casually in my bathroom. My glass of shambling. I was trying, I was just trying to, I was trying to be a part of the thing.

You know, it was awesome. My turn. Go ahead. Oh, fuck. No. I had quite the fortuitous week this past week. I flew out to Michigan and Wisconsin. First of all, let me just say, Michigan.

My heart and soul with Michigan. My heart's with Michigan, my soul's with Wisconsin. The People's Republic of Wisconsin is what they're calling it. I did a rally with Francesca Hong, who's running for governor. She's the frontrunner right now. It's very exciting stuff. She's Democratic Socialist. And also with Abdul El-Sayed.

Nice. And Abdul al-Aa'iad was able to overcome being outspent 10 to 1, $32 million from the Israeli lobby, $64 million total. Insane. Record-breaking amounts of money were spent on this primary. And we knocked on doors, we canvassed up and down the state for both Abdelal-Aid, Donovan McKinney, and Will Lawrence, two, and all three of them won. You worked phone banks, too, didn't you? And we did phone banks, we did it all. And now, your boys become.

public enemy number one. Gabe, Hasanami Productions has a very cool video I wanted to show you guys. You've kind of all, you've been public anime number one. Well, for the past couple of months, but it's never been to this degree

where now I feel like, CNN is panicking, MSNBC is panicking. No, no, no. Haasnabby Productions on Twitter. George Carvel is panicking. James Carvel said he's going to quit the party. He was Bill Clinton's campaign manager famously.

I used to love him until he was in the movie years ago. Yeah. And then if you go down, if you go, oh, never mind. It's fine, then. Oh, damn, that was fast. Okay, go down. You're going to scroll down a lot.

There's a Will Kane intro. I wanted to show you guys. They're making aura edits for your boy right there. Here, full screen. Oh, I saw this one. Live from Texas, this is the Will Kane show. Democrats have a new kingmaker. He's the visionary.

You're a kingmaker? He's the visionary of Democratic Socialist. And it's his party. And that party has an invite list. And he has a vision. Did he add this music or was that on five? As to the future of the Democratic Socialist of America, when asked a very interesting question about what he would add to the platform.

Here's what he said about the future of the DSA. Arrest and prosecute and bring about corruption charges for every prominent member of this administration that is engaged in corruption. Prosecute and arrest, the ICE agents that have also done crimes as well on the job. Bring out the secret police. Now, this is not what the fucking Fox News didn't put this part. Horror edits. You didn't bring up trick-treat.

We on go, we on go. Live from Texas. So that was, so yeah, this is just a little taste of it, but it has been pretty insane. My DMs, my inbox is flooded with people just fucking being like, I'm going to kill you.

Roger Stone. That's who I was thinking of. You said Rudy Starts with an R. Roger Stone. Yeah, you don't know him? I do know him. He's awful.

He's not a kingmaker at all. He's a hatchet man. Yeah, but people... Why do you know Roger Stone? I'm smart. I think Roger Stone. He's got the gray hair. He's a white guy.

Get me, Roger Stone. Yeah, he's the swinger. Only one in politics. He got... He's a swinger with the... Trump elected. He's a swinger with the Nixon backtad. He's the...

He's crazy. what he does. He's crazy. He did not get Trumpolized. He's nuts. He did not. He would love to hear that. He would love to hear someone in my proximity.

I watched his Netflix documentary called Get Me Roger Stone. And I said, wow. That guy did some stuff. Yeah. Yeah, he's a horrible guy. And now Hassan is just like him. He's a horrible monster. But yeah, I mean, Roger Stone and all of these other horrible monsters have been coming

after your boy and, you know, a couple more victories. I feel like they're just going to arrest. to me. In my crate, I don't understand right wing. No, I understand in politics a little bit, but I don't understand right wing where it's like, you're like, I think we should prosecute anyone

who's corrupt and also fuck ICE agents and for them to be like, whoa! Is that really the controversial take? I was like, I don't understand what's so controversial about that and what's so radical about wanting universal child care, universal health care, and a livable wage. Well, I think that's communism. Oh.

And that's bad. Well, I think we should sort of redefine what communism is. He's being facetious. Oh, yeah. Oh, shit. But no, but that's what the, that's what the performance have been doing. They've been literally fucking trying to aggressively come after me using cutie Cinderella's

gift. You don't think I'm autistic. It was just a piece of history. I don't think so. You don't think I'm autistic? No. What if we're all? Jack Septuicai said you were. Oh, did you see that clip? I did. The clip went mega viral. Yeah. I flew a plane with Jack Septicai the other day. And I asked Jack if he thought I was autistic because Jack's autistic, I learned, he told me.

And I asked him, I said, do you think I'm autistic? And he said, he said, you like planes. Yeah, you like, no, he said, you're flying a plane and you're not a pilot. You learned how to fly the plane without being a pilot. Yeah, you're autistic.

I just thought I was so aware. Guys, I got to tell you, I keep leaving my debit card at restaurants. Oh my goodness. I know. It's so annoying. I have to circle back because I forget it. It's like an extra hour every time I go out to eat.

Well, Will, I feel like there's a way you could solve for this. No, my debit card's always going to be so boring. I'm never going to remember it. No, no, Will. You got to get cash app. Why? Because you can put your photo on your debit card. You can personalize it.

You can draw a little doodle. May have. Yeah. A doodle? Yeah, you can draw it. What if I wanted to have my favorite flower, the orchid, on there? That'd be awesome. You could doodle it and put it on there, and then everyone will know it's your card and you never forget it ever, probably maybe.

Oh, my. And I know you like to spend dangerously. I do. But when you have your cash app card, they enable you to spend safely. And they even by declining suspicious transactions. That's right, because there's a lot of suspicious places you're eating at. I know. And if your card is ever lost or stolen after you leave the restaurant, you can close on the app.

Oh, my gosh. With just one touch. It sounds so convenient, you guys. I wish that there was some kind of special promo code to make it even... Well, there is. New Cash App customers can earn 10 bucks if they use code CashF 10 in their profile and sign up and send $5 to a friend within 14 days. Terms apply. 10 bucks for you and $5 for a ram?

That's awesome. That's a whole pizza. Well... Cash app is a financial service platform. or not a bank banking services provided by cash up bank partners prepaid debit cards issued by sutton bank member fdic cash app visa debit flex card issued by sutt and bank card court bank n a pursuant to a license or visa us aing see terms and conditions for the sutton prep prepaid card set in debit flex card cash app green features savings direct deposits roundup

overdraft coverage and discounts provided by cash app a blocking brand visit cash at dot app slash legal podcast for full disclosures download cash app today and make your money work for you visit our link in bio Of what? I guess you can know that you're autistic. You got fucking lit up when you saw the A320. Yeah, it's a nice gift. You get lit up if you, oh, he's autistic. I was about to say.

I'm very neurotypical. I was going to say you would light up. You would light up if says, I don't know, a sculpture of Mao or some shit. Everyone thinks. First of all, that's a touchy subject. I disavow. Oh, you disavow. I disavow Austin.

I disavow Massadol. Yeah. And complex figure. Yeah. complex figure that I don't support at all. Yeah, I would never vote for him. I'm more of a Washington fan I think. Like George?

Well, fuck, everybody did back then. I'm not that game, write that one down. No, no, no, that's got to stay. That's funny. But anyway, I don't support George Washington. I think what he did was

horrific. You don't like the American Revolution? And he was ugly. No, he was... That's crazy. We literally, 1770s. say the greatest year of my life other than 14. 153. What the fuck am I, I, I don't know where woke even is anymore. Okay? What am I supposed to do? The guy was... Oh, the man lives in

fear of woke. I'm just saying, I'm a big fan of George Washington Carver. I mean, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I think George Washington and what he did would... I'm just saying... Shut up! I'm just saying. He was born in 1748. I don't even know you're saying any more.

He was born in 1748. I'm not surprised. He had some things. He had some skeletons in his closet. Wow. I'm just not surprised. Thank you. I don't know you. Okay.

I don't know. I disavow. It's okay. I disavow. I don't support that. I protect you from the woke. I think Lincoln was a lot better. I do.

Well, well, he also, you know what? He was responsible for like one of the biggest indigenous executions. God damn it. There's not a good person in history, is there? Alice Paul. Oh. Okay.

Who is she? I don't know. She was a, she was a fantastic woman. You know Alice Paul? Do you know Alice? She was a suffragette that helped push the Susan B. Anthony, like a amendment, you know?

Well, yeah, I know, but you don't seem to know any other women. Well, he's misogynistic. No, I'm not misogynistic. Alice Paul went on a hunger strike for weeks in order to get women to vote. The women's suffrage movement was terrible. Women's Suffrage movement. I think women should not. I just want to end women's,

Well, I think that that's good. Whether they're on a jet or not. I just, I do think, you think they shouldn't, I do think that that word is very confusing. Because like, come on, suffer, suffrage, come on, it's bullshit. Yeah. So we want to end whatever it is that are making women suffer, but suffrage is a good thing. Yeah. Which I do believe that women should be able to vote.

That's right. I do. Thank you. Bold and brave take in 2026. And I think women vote harder than men and they vote better than men, mostly. Yeah. So, okay. Yeah.

I support this is a, this has been a complex episode. Very, very complex episode. But we're, we're striving. We're going through. Yeah, we're striving. All right, Kitty Cinderella was on the streamer games. And she was so good. Must be nice.

Take it awake. The fuck is wrong with you. Tell us about them, streamer games. I just think about that all the time. I, listen, guys, I went into streamer games. and my team started our group chat like two weeks ago. Oh, wow. Yeah, we were really on top of things.

We're on your team. My team was the incredible KDB, Maya Higa, Ronald Stable, and Nicewig. So kind of the dream team. I love Nicewig. Yeah, Nicewig's the man. I actually did combat jiu-jitsu with Nicewig this week. Really?

Yeah. For why? We're just doing a video, fight each other. Oh, a video. Yeah, he's incredible. That's incredible. Nice wig is the nicest guy. He literally is a nice wig.

Yeah, more. And he's definitely not Ludd. Get it? Hey, take it. Take it back. Nice wig. Hey,

take it back. I'll beat your house. For the record, he wasn't calling Llewig mean. He was saying he was just saying. I'm saying like he's not blood wig. Right. He's nice wig.

Yeah, but Lugge. He's like if God, you repeated it. Yeah. He's like if Lund Wig was a job. Moving on. Moving on.

Anyway, um, and so, and I am a practicer. And you guys know, like, I'm not, like, I'm not competitive in the way for myself, but I don't want to let a team down. Right. And so, and so I was like, guys, what am I doing? And we landed on pretty quickly that no matter what I needed to do half and half, which is you cut something in half equally.

Oh, okay. Yeah. I mean, that's your area of expertise. Right. Yeah. You got stomped. Yeah, you would. So I got last.

You got last in half and half? Yes. What's a half and a half? So something happened. I don't super understand. You cut something and you try and make the two halves match. Of what had happened. But you're a chef.

This is me and Katie. That's what you do. Yeah. You cook. So this is Katie's Canadian. That's not even close. That's so bad. That's not even close.

What the fuck? I know. I know. So I've never co-dassociated in my entire life. For one team, but it might not be the all-stars. But. Oh, my God. It is 56 grams

With a difference of 28 grams You guys are eliminated From half and half Was that the only event you did? No Oh Did you do better in the other? The thing with half and half, you guys

The thing with half and half is we went in with We had we were seventh to go in half and half So we had this whole plan made so long to talk Katie and I. We had this plan where she would She would do this on the side of the table until you find the center of gravity and then that's where we'd cut.

Okay. You know? And then she started doing it and she was like, never mind, this is stupid. And I was like, yeah,

stupid. And then we went to cut it. And when we were walking, because you saw that thing had a spout, right? We were walking up and the Ortiz sisters

went before us. They got perfect. They got zero zero. And we're like, and Wendy comes over to us to give us tips because she's so freaking nice. Right.

She gives us tips and we're like, you go right and a half like hot dog style and she was like, yeah, a hot dog right in half. Yeah.

I said, okay. Wait, so you got tips and you still fucked it up? She said, ignore the flower, because there's a flower on that. She said, don't go through the eye, don't go through the middle. And I said, okay, towards the spout or away from the spout. She said, away from the spout, which makes no fucking sense. Because then you're giving the spout more weight. But I don't think she did that intentionally.

I think she was genuinely confused. And then Katie and I took that as law. Like, we just took it as like, these are the Ten Commandments. We're following it. Our minds went blank. When I tell you, I've never co-dissociated in my life. I think both of us were out of body. And then the second the knife went down, we looked up into each other's faces and we went, oh, no.

Yeah, because it's not even close. It's not even close. It's so immediately observably wrong that I'm having a hard time. Yeah. Even believing your story. And I know you're telling the truth. It's what happened. Were you better at anything?

So I also was in charge of the paper airplane, which you guys. I also saw that. I spent eight hours. So I got seven. It did not go well. Yes. It didn't go well. I know you're afraid of flying, but.

Austin, I learned everything. I made the Suzanne. If anybody, any paper airplane experts, so Suzanne is a pretty good, it's a pretty reliable machine. And then you kind of threw it right in the dirt. I don't know what had happened.

You got to, you know. I just, I brought, yeah, I literally, Gabe knows he was there. I brought a suitcase.

Guys, I brought a suitcase with 20 plus paper airplane so I could test them outside in the arena. But, Kitty, I was looking at Twitter for a few seconds and everything was positive about you. I thought you were a champion. Well, that's because at the end, I clutched with Simon Says. Yeah. So everybody forgot about your horrific.

So I would like to formally challenge you all to a game of Simon Says. You're so good at it. You, like, I got in a fight with this guy last time. Did you? When I was at the stream rewards, why? Well, here's the thing. I got to fight with Steve Max. Why did you get into a fight with the Simon Says guy?

Well, because, well... Because number one, his name's not even Simon. Well, yeah. Number two, he never asked me to spit on it. No, no, no, no. What? That was funny. I kept saying that all day.

Steve... Simon says spit on it? This guy. Simon says, spit on it. Oh. Simon says bounce on that thing. Simon says, is it pink? Oh, my God.

These are funny. What is wrong with you? I like, no. A bunch of prudes on this podcast. I can't believe I'm going. you to spit on it. Yeah. It's just weird coming from cutie.

No, it's not. Suck on it. Ew. No, Simon didn't say. No, Simon didn't say. Okay, well, fine. Okay, whatever. Anyway.

So this guy here, when I was, because he's hired him every year, right? Yeah. This guy, I didn't, I, I got into like a verbal altercation with him. Really? Because I, he said, Simon says,

and I did the thing, and then he fucking called me out. I said listen you prick No you didn't I didn't say prick But him and I got into it and then he he had it out for me He said shoe shoe he's got a really big ego This guy really He's the Simon says champion

He's the fucking Simon says guy and I was pissed at him He's the reigning Simon's champion Wait this is funny I know this has nothing to with anything But the way this shot looks it looks like nice waist pants are censored It's like a sensor box and he's just not wearing pants No no but he's really into his thing He is really into it really into it's how it makes his entire limit Which is great I'm really into my thing

You tried to question the integrity of the... Is there video evidence? I'm sure there is, but he was wrong. Chatters, if you can find that. No, no, no. He was wrong. I got out a few times. After I just started throwing because I was like,

he doesn't give it. Let's watch the... QD you win here. I think this is where they announced it. This wasn't me playing. Say Simon says stop. That call. Yeah.

I win. I win and freaking high-fived everyone, and I gave everybody hugs. And then you won for your team. Yeah. That's amazing. Yeah, it was pretty good, guys. What, uh, what level, what positions you guys ended on?

Second. What? Yeah. After you sucked so much? We would have been way better if I wouldn't have done that. It says hands up son. Uh, nice week won MVP, right? There was no MVP.

That's what, or they were saying he was the MVP of the whole tournament. I think, um, yeah, it's, yeah. I mean, Nicewig did really good. I think Katie did really good. I held Katie back on half and half. Half and half is my fault. It was not Katie's fault. Because it was supposed to be, it was supposed to be whoever didn't run the 100 meter

dash was going to do half and half with me. And then Katie was like, I don't want to run the 100 meter dash. And she was like, you got me. And I was like, yeah, of course. I bake. That's incredible, though, Kitty. Well, congratulations on your victory. What did you win?

A t-shirt. Oh. Oh, from streamer games on second place. Oh, I won a trophy, but I don't know where I'm like. Nice. You don't wear. I left it somewhere. Who won first place?

Selbit. He is a mastermind. Team Brazil. Team international. Yeah. You got second place? I got second place. Second year in a row,

I got second place. My whole team got second place. Oh, your whole team got second place. Yeah. But you didn't really perform. But technically my Simon says, since it got first place was our tiebreaker

because otherwise Mexico would have gotten second place. What team were you on? What? All stars. Okay, got it. And then I did not. How did America place? I think like seventh.

did not do very good. But I did not live up to my name, unfortunately, this time around. And so I'm nervous that I might not get invited back again. Well, I can tell you, I feel like you have it's okay on the other side. Yeah. I feel like you have an end. Yeah. You would think. I think because you're going to be married. Well, you never know. You never know. You never know. You never know when you might go from wife to co-worker. You never know. No, no, no. If we get divorced, if we get divorced, I own half the streamer games. I'm choosing to believe I wasn't invited because I was on a gay cage. No.

But it would have been nice. You should have told him to just invite me because I wasn't going to be there anyway. I listen, I literally didn't even know if I was getting invited. I'm not even kidding you guys. I'm sorry. You know what? I didn't know. That was insane that I even suggested that you, he does his own.

Fuck him. He does do his own things. I did get many DMs and this is maybe a misconception. I got many DMs come streamer games. It's like, hey, what do I need to do to get invite? And I said, ask Ledway. No, no, I said Simon says spit on it. I don't like that though.

I don't like that people reach it. People shouldn't reach out to love you just did that. I know, and I don't like it. Yeah, but you just did that to her. No, no, but I didn't, I didn't mean it. I know, and it's wrong. No, it's wrong, and I shouldn't have done it. And sometimes we do wrong things.

Dude, you know what's going to happen. You know what? I'm just craving right now. What? Chinese food. Yum. You want some? Yeah.

I think I'm going to run it for that Patreon. Yeah. Chinese food for the Patreon. Oh my gosh. You order some Mediterranean food. Magnoia, not Magnolia. Mongolian beef in honor of Swift. Did you?

With all the onions. Oh, true. Did nobody... Some Mediterranean. Are you not picking up on what Austin is doing? No, I just... I turned it out. Maybe it's so fucking ridiculous.

What did you do? God forbid I want a little Mediterranean. Everybody, everybody agreed on Chinese food. And Austin went, oh, I love Chinese food. Let's get Mediterranean instead. That's crazy. I could get some dry chicken and rice. You know, donor kebab on top of it.

You know? Why not? No. Okay. All right, fuck it. We don't need that. I want it. I love that.

You know, speaking of, I don't know, never mind. Fuck it. What's going on? What? What's going on with you? I know. No, no, it's fine. You're second guessing yourself.

No, it's fine. Just spit it out. No, I wasn't. Simon says spit on it. Simon says spit on it. I was going to say, I think we can close on this. But I observe something, and I know there's Europeans that watch this. Yeah.

As an American, sure. I want to let you guys know. I travel a lot to many parts of the world. I've been to Mexico. I've been to lots of the places in the United States. I've been to Scandinavia. I've been to China. I've been to Japan.

I've been a lot, many places. Passport flexing. And for some reason, I don't know what it is about Europeans. But y'all fart in public a lot. And like I experience this on numerous different occasions to start on the plane, but y'all in the middle of, of just public. You just fucking rip ass

and it's fucking disgusting and it all sounds as it smells the same too. Are you doing European racism right now? I'm just saying. I don't know what it is. I've been here many times. I've never had it. Not all, I don't know what it was.

It's the cheese. I don't know what it was. It's got to be the cheese. But on the train, on the plane, I'm literally in public at the club. Have you ever considered? considered for a moment that Christian was farting and not telling you. That would be awesome.

That would be hilarious. Did you smell the same? Yes. You've been to Europe a lot. You've never had it. And I bet you were feeding him non-dwink friendly food that he's never had. It's interesting because he did you taste it? No, no, he took antibiotics because he had strep throat in New York.

Why do you guys always have strep throat? I don't know. I didn't get it this time. Thank God. I don't know. I have no idea. All right. I have something I'd like to talk about.

Okay. Guys, I have started reading a book and it is... Oh, go ahead. Dude. I sit here. What an actual monster. No, no, no, no, please, please, please. And I pull out one topic,

Will, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. And old fucking John Q News asshole over here, pulls out his phone, and you just started having a conversation again. I've been here. Yeah, you have! You're like, what I can rely on these days! I only use my phone once to look up Roger Stone. Yeah, hold on.

All right, go ahead, Will. She has nowhere to go. She has nothing going on. Go ahead, Will. I don't have shit. shit going on. I really don't. Yeah, but I'm off this week. I had a vacation. I started reading a book and it's fantastic, you guys.

Dungeon crawler, Carl. Really? It's so fun. It's so fun. What's it about? All I imagined was Carl from Jimmy Neutron. Crawling in a dungeon. What's it about? It's like if life were a video game and there's aliens that

come and take over the planet. But since I've been reading this book, everyone is reading this book. Really? Every time I post it or I'm walking around with my copy in public because I've been going to a dog park and reading. I'm kind of on that. You're in the dog club. I'm kind of in the like I'm so fucking interesting that I look performative. Oh, I love that.

Just at a dog park reading. I love that. That's really cool. But that's my life. Me, I go to the dog park just to watch the dogs alone. You know what? I see people like you and I'm like, I wish I was like that. It's been a renaissance for me.

And you know what? I am enjoying this book so much. Really? It's really good. Is there a sequels? There's eight of them. Oh, great. And since I started reading it less than a month ago, I'm on book four.

Wow. I know. How many is it a, is it what? There's eight of them. Oh. I did that with a court of rose and thorns or something. And then I got, no, it got, it's so bad. Well, it's smart.

And I couldn't, yeah, I didn't like it. You should try Denghryong Carl. Is it smart? No. Does that make you horny? No. Wait, you watch. Seven husbands of Evelyn and Hugh.

though. Wait, so you read smart and it didn't make you ask her. No. Stop asking. I have to be darned. I can answer these questions. I'm not asking if you're currently horny. I'm just saying. Oh, right now? No. I'm just asking. No. Wait, wait, wait. But like, how does that work then? You're just reading, you're just hitting it raw. You're not even like flicking the bean. No, you just read a book. It's just for stories. You could not ask your sister if she's flicking the bean. You can ask.

No. I'm not. She's got a bean that's something. I don't like calling it a bean though. What do you want to call it a pearl? Mother of pearl. Just I don't know. A clam. You two are not housebroken. Are you pound in the clam?

Stop! I don't want to think about it. He's clam! Guys, chill out. What else? What else could we call it? I mean, we've done this before. Yeah, yeah.

Bean casserole. Ew. All right, ladies and gentlemen, on that note, We are going to move into the Patreon where we service the working class. In the comments, let me know if you're reading Dungeon Crawler Carlin. Let me know what book you're on. What is that?

What is this? Do you know what's in this box? Do you know what's in this box? Hang on. All right. Hold on. Just quickly. Well, let's say that.

It's the fucking spout. On the Patreon. So hold on. I have a scale, yes. On the Patreon, we are going to give Qty the opportunity. redeem herself. Oh, it smells good. From her streamer

schemes. Yeah. Is that from Lush? I'm already dissociated. I saw it. It's like a Pavlovian response. All right. We'll see you behind the payroll.

Patreon.com slash fear end. We could never recover from the person that got you in the paper. This is a bit of a family for a hundred generations. The shame was so great for my grandmamma. She killed herself. Can I? We never had a guest.

Run away with the cat you hip-up, me. Okay, okay. She's screaming the night. Point in Austin, why he take him on cut you in a baby-b-b-b-b-b-b. First of all, I thought I... She put the shotgun in her mouth. I thought... You know how hard it is to find a shotgun in Italy?

Okay. Mera, all over the ceiling. Guys, can I take you through my butler? The No, we've moved on. Can I think To other hotel Other hotel shit that you've done.

For me, I spit. I'm sorry. We gotta go back to the lump guy Only got five euros. It's really funny to me. That's crazy. He also did the loop thing in China and Japan.

Yes. And we went with a Chinese man. You can pack lube.