Fear& - Gianmarco Returns | Fear&

Episode Date: June 22, 2026

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Neither. Yeah. Oh, yeah. We're going to Rocky Horror while we're in town. Oh, yeah. It's good. You've seen it? I was on shrooms. It was which by the way, not there's a reason that's not like a Broadway thing to do. No, it's like do shrooms in Broadway. It's a lot. Especially Rocky Horror. It's a lot. Yeah, but that's the right show. You're not going to do Shrooms in Hamilton. It's going to be my first time. It's going to be my first time. Crazy enough because I'm not a camp person. So it's great. I, yeah, I'm not. Luke Evans is like. Unbelievable. I just got on to Rocky. When you said you're not a camp person, I thought you meant outdoors. No.

Oh, the entire time I thought you were a camp person. Then I understand. I'm in camp. Like, I'm just not like, I was confused why you brought up Rocky Moore. Neither one of you clocked that he was talking about camp in relation to.

No, I didn't understand. Why do people think you're gay? Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to New York City and welcome to the Fear Ann podcast. or we are joined by one of our favorite guests, Jean Marco. Hello.

Jean Marco, Bonjourno. Buenoserreira. Grazie. Do you speak Italian? Oh, a poco. Ompoc. Oh, wow.

You heard all the words. Wow, that's it. Como stay? I'm going to French. Tre bien, merci. Oh, wow. You have a trialingual. Buenos Aires.

He did come back from a international tour for like 1500 months. In Asia. In Asia. Yeah. I'm really. Yeah. North Korea was a killer. Did you actually, did you do the Pyongyang Dome?

I would. I'm trying to go into mainland. I mean, we met, we did our podcast before I went. You were right about the egg sandos. Was not exaggerating. Yeah, yeah. You went in, did you try? Tomogos Sando do do do kudiska.

Yeah, I just said egg sandwich. Yeah. That's, you're pretty shit. No. I told you you were supposed to get gutter. It's good to do that because you just sound racist doing what he was. No, we had this conversation. his pockets already, it's not racist.

It's literally how you're supposed to do it. Yeah. No, it's true. Yeah. I think they're more chill about the accent stuff. Yeah. When it's the main accent. Right.

Yeah. That's true. That's a good, you know what? That's a good point. You'll see them do, like in Japan specifically like an American sketch. Right. Like, hello, sir. Yeah. How do you?

Well, I find that deeply offensive. Yeah. Yeah. I tried to bring our values there. So where did you go? You went to Japan. Yo, I went fucking everywhere. So did Tokyo?

What's the other one in Japan? Osaka? No, not Osaka, the other one. Kyoto. Oh, Kyoto. Hong Kong. I did Singapore. I did Taipei. Are we allowed to say that on this podcast?

We don't recognize it. What do mean? Taipei. We do recognize it. Oh, we do recognize Chinese Taipei? Oh, no, no. I would say we don't recognize Chinese people. We do recognize Chinese people. We don't recognize. Good, good. We do recognize Chinese people. We don't exist. We don't.

recognize their rule over Taiwan. No, no, that's your take. No, the American, the American government recognizes one China policy. Oh, okay. They just have a policy called strategic ambiguity. Got it. Where they still, you know, funnel resources and weapons to Taiwan. I hate that as a term strategic ambiguity. It's just called lying. I'll be honest, John Barker. I'm still ironing out my foreign policy. Yeah. Yeah. So are we. Right. Yeah. And we'll get back to that because there's a very funny thing that he's going to talk about that'll dovetail into some chaos that has unfolded in my life as well since the last time I saw you, but I want to get back to your foreign misadventures. Singapore, Bangkok, Indonesia, where'd I go?

No, what's it called? What's the one in Indonesia? Jakarta. And I did Mumbai and Bangalore. Love Jakarta. Wow. So yeah, it was a full tour. That's amazing.

Where did you kill the hardest? Ooh, I mean, India was. was nuts. Because I think stand-up is just so, it's really in there. Like there's stand-up comics. Some of these countries, stand-up is so new.

Yeah. And so it's like sometimes an American, not an American joke, but the jokes could be like a little more. I watched a special in South Korea. It was like the first South Korea special. And I swear,

I was watching the subtitles. And this guy went up there and he was just like, men and women, they're different. And the audience was like, ah! So like you can only,

you know, you got to start, you got to plant that seat. Really an observational comedy. And then 40 years later, you can be like, they're actually not that different. You think about some airplane food bits. You'll crush. You crush. Oh, yeah.

Have you ever thought about that? So the problem is their airplane food is astounding. Yeah. Yeah. They're like, I don't even understand what this guy's talking about. It's the greatest food I've ever had. So as someone who wants to get into stand-up. Oh, my.

I think maybe I should tour. We don't need any more. Maybe I should tour Asia. What do you think? That'd be great. Oh, you want to start. Asia tour. Yeah.

The hardest place to do stand-up. Yes. A country that you do not have any idea what their cultural norms are is where you're going to start doing observational bids. I think they'd love me. It's so cool talking to the Hong Kong comics, though, because they perform in the mainland. And I think it's like as an American, it's like,

oh, if you say the wrong thing, the government official would, you know, shoot you right to the show. And it was more like, it was more, I know, you've been, we get it, you're smarter. It was more like he would do a show, this guy told me, somewhere in the mainland, and mentioned the pandemic. And so the government official emails him and goes like, hey, you can't talk about the pandemic. Yeah, that's a big no-no. It's a big no-no.

But he writes back like, then what do you want me to say? Which I didn't know you could talk back to the government like that. Yeah, of course. And he says, you can say, hey, guys, remember when we spent two years at home? And so that's what he says now. And the audience laughs at it because they know it's kind of code. And in a way, they've added a new level of humor that you get only through the beauty of censorship. That is so unnecessary and so on board with like that that that's so in line with like the Chinese experience.

Yeah. He's pro censorship. Oh, yeah. We should be censoring Nick Shirley. Oh, big time. Yeah. Oh, see? Oh, yeah.

There you go. I think they're on to something. When I talk about reeducation camps, everyone gets very sensitive until until I say, what about your QAnonon uncle? And then they're like, oh, my God. That's the greatest idea of all. We need a camp for him to concentrate on what's long. How about education camps, period. These people have never had it.

That's what I've said. How about the schooling system that functions? Yeah. Yes. Yeah, we don't even need to call them camps. We'll just call them public schools. Daycare? Daycare?

Daycare. Yeah. Adult daycare. Yeah. We send them there. They have to go to. They have to learn to read and write. And also, you know, basic math and things like that.

And that, you know, you can't be a. afraid of every brown person that you see. Yes. Or, or, you know, that elections are not stolen. That's all the time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's been just the top of mind. I've been very annoyed with what's going on in California. I wonder. And you, you know what? I've been listening to you more now since you've been wearing the suits. That's such a lie. Like you've just been listening to me. Because I mean, he would, he used to show up on camera looking rather slubbish. Just slobbish. Now he, now he, now he looks good. Do you like it? Do you like this life? I do. Really. Well, I don't like. Well, I don't the government prosecution angle, but I like the, I like the suits. Is that what it's for, for

like, you know, building a character reputation of a, a little bit. Yeah. So it did start after I got yelled at a lot. And then Fox News was doing like eight hits of me a day. Like at the top of every hour, they would have like a fuck Hassan hour where they were like, this guy's a terrorist and you should be afraid of him. Uh-huh. And I realize like, if I'm wearing a suit in the clips that they post of me, then grandmothers are going to be like, well, he's a handsome guy, maybe. Yeah. Like, it's much more important. Hamas doesn't wear suits.

But it, but it also, well, they do. But it also worked. Well, I know, but their grandmothers don't know that. But it also worked because I got a lot of feedback from people who were like, no, my grandparents actually kind of fuck with you now. Do you ever think about going even more patriotic and going American flag time? No. No.

Because. Sure. That's crazy. Go old school. A little founding daddy. Flag in a classic. No, I think I want to look. Flagpin is good.

Flagpin is great. I want to have my own, you know, style. You need a little page. You need a little page. Do the upside down flag pin. That's the one where election was stolen, right? Yes. And then if anyone says, hey, you're saying a stolen.

Oh, mistake. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm not going to engage you this cowardly behavior. You're wearing the suit, so you're starting. Yeah. It's your Palestinian flag. You can put something on that Lebanese flag.

Since, yeah, since the last time we've conversed, I've been, you know, I've been in a little bit of trouble. Are you scared? No, I mean, what are you going to do? I flee the country? Yeah. And no. Claim asylum and.

Where? I don't know. Well, I can't go to UK. Well, clearly. I'm going back to Istanbul. You can't give us a headset. I can't go to Turkey. You can't go to Turkey.

No, I would get arrested in Turkey. Just give us. Yeah. For which thing? I've written extensively about the Turkish government. They're not exactly fond of me over there either. So that's the problem. If you go to jail, though, then someday you could be president.

of them. Well, it's true. I need something. Yeah, many, many have gone through that process. Adolf Hitler, Recep Taybardoan. Yeah. Yeah. Somebody's Iran. We'll see. Yeah. Maybe. But I, the only place I go to in the world that, like, would have a non-extradition that they would enforce would probably be like China or Russia. You should always join the French Foreign Legion. That's true. I could do that. Yeah, you're big enough. Yeah. I don't want to run that much though. I feel like the training is pretty rigorous. And also I don't want to do war crimes in Africa. Like I can't want them all. Have you looked up prisons like what it would be? Like what kind of prison you'd get sent to? But that's kind of funny. No, I have not. What if you're with Galane? If you,

if you got in that, that means sounds like a nice prison. I was talking to Adam Friedland about this. No, I did actually talk about the prison thing with Adam Friedland and he was like, you should convert to Judaism so they'll send you to the Jewish one, which is apparently much nicer. Oh, is that a real thing? That's what he told me. And he does lie all the time. I don't know if he's lying about that, but he said like there is a, you know, there is like a, like one where, you know, all the, all the financial criminals, a go to that's like much nicer. Maybe he just meant that was the Jewish business.

But then you have to spend all your time with Jews. Yeah, I don't have any issues with that. It was a joke. No, I'm Jewish. Oh. Are you? Yeah. Wow.

I mean, is that a joke? No, I didn't. I didn't know you were Jewish. Were you? Are you? I didn't know that. No, most, you didn't know? No, I, of course.

No, I've been to the prison. Oh, you got arrested. You're Italian. Lebanese. Lebanese? Yes, Lebanese. That's the thing, though. I think as a Jews.

We both have schnaz. Yeah, I got a big nose. We're almost touching. In L.A., they come up to me all the time. They said, are you Jewish? And I said, I'm Lebanese. They do that to me, too, though. Yeah, but let me, come on.

And then I, you know, they say, you know, how do they react? Did they go, you'll be a Jewish soon enough? No, no. You know who they're not doing that, too? This guy. You have the most Germanic face. Yeah, they see you. They go, run!

This is like, this man's ancestors did some shit. Yeah. I started telling him I was Lebanese, but then I realized, Lebanese isn't a religion. So I could be a Jewish Lebanese person, I guess. Most likely not. But there's a possibility. Always a possibility.

So I started telling him I was Christian. And did that sway them away? Yes. Yeah. I mean, Lebanese work too. It's the ones that want to convert to, it's the ones that want to do, oh, let's make you orthodox. Well, sometimes they just want to do the to fill in. And I, you know, I'm no religious fan, but I've always like, and that's it.

Yeah. That's, that's the end goal. Just to do that. And then you move on. You don't want my money. Yeah. Just the tephilin. So that's the, the, the, to fillin.

Tofilin. To fill it. It's the leather daddy gear. Oh, that's, that is. It is that accurate? No, it looks dope. It's an anime thing.

Like it looks like, all right. Well, shit. And then it's got, it's got a little, tell them I am. It's got a little caba at the top of it. Like little,

you know, like the one in Mecca, it's a little square. And the square has a little. Yeah. I went Muslim with it. I don't know why you went there with it. Have you been to Mecca?

Well, mine was more chewish. No, I've not. That's crazy. But yeah, the Tefillan has. little like pieces of paper in it with like a piece of the Torah right or something do you have any I don't know about the pieces of paper in the thing yeah I'm pretty sure the black box has like

little writings inscriptions from either the Torah or see I study my enemy very well uh-huh yeah that's what it is do you have plans to visit mecca possibly maybe what why are you offensive I'll go with I'll answer yeah thank you yeah I don't even sure maybe I might do it I think it'd be cool are you moved by such things no I We could do a podcast. Fear and... Mecca. Maybe I should cut that.

Fear and Mecca. In Saudi Arabia. You know Mecca is in Saudi Arabia. Oh, shit. Where did you think it was? Well, I don't know. Middle East, somewhere. Okay.

Well, it's in Saudi Arabia. I was not too far off, right? Well, it's the Gulf, but... Right. Well, anyway. On that note, I do need to interrupt this podcast for a very important announcement. Sure. Great.

We have a very important announcement. Fear and podcast. The Fear Ann podcast is going on tour. Ladies and gentlemen, do you like to go to concerts? Do you like to go to events? Me too. Where do you buy tickets? I don't know.

Seekek. That's right. You buy them on Seatgeek, which is today's sponsor of today's podcast. With over 35 million downloads, Seekek is the number one rated ticketing app. There are more than 70,000 events listed on Seatgeek, including concerts, sports, festivals and podcast tours. It's officially the new year and so many artists have already released tickets for their 2026 tours like Lady Gaga, Cardi B, Zara Larson, Austin Show,

Chris Stapleton, Morgan Wallin, Alex Warren, Demi Lovato, the Backstreet Boys, and more. Look at all the things you can buy on Seat Geek, all the tickets. It's unbelievable. The new year means new artists are on tour. To make it even better, you could use Code Fear 10 for 10% off your seat geek. tickets. That's 10% off tickets with promo code for your 10. Wow. Wow. That was crazy. We certainly watched that trailer. Wow. What an enthusiastic

announcement. We watched it. We watched the trailer and we loved it. Yeah. That's amazing. Yeah. Is For Cities a tour? That's just some stops. I mean, that's crazy. He's flexing. Okay. Jean Marco. He just tour mag does. You have to understand Jean Marco. He doesn't want to go on tour. He'll go everywhere. And so we had to, I had to compromise. I told when we were doing three stops and then I added a fourth one. Okay. And didn't tell him about it. We'll do anything but help his friends.

Yeah. Well, I mean, no, he's helpful. I do. I think you're helpful. You're helpful. He does a podcast. Have you done the live before? I've done live events.

I've spoken at events. We've spoken, but like with your friends and everyone's laughing and it's fun. Look a bit by the bug. I've done like, I did. Team Heidegger's. Oh, you did? Show live. Office, office hours?

Yeah, office hours. That's fun. That was fun. I love nothing more than getting in front of the crowd. Yeah. And working a room. I don't do stand-up comedy, but I love getting in front. He's aspiring to it, though.

No, no, no. I just, I just, I don't, too much pressure when they're like, tell the jokes. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll just do the jokes when you don't expect it. The other parts, you would have been great at. Like guerrilla. There's sometimes with a lot, because I've done live podcast shows,

sometimes you're like, am I scamming them? Oh, really? Really. Yeah. This is a great. You got imposter syndrome? No, I think we, more people should, it's imposter reality. I think it's like, if we sold tickets to what we're doing

right now, that should be a crime. Really? That's crazy. I think I would enjoy it being on stage. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But okay. Yeah, I see what I mean. No, it's fun to be on stage. Yeah, okay. It's fun. It's like, it's like a bank heist. Yeah. And you're like, this is great. Yeah. No, no, no. I'd like to think that if we're in front of a crowd right now, we're really selling the fucking. Madison Square. Yeah. We're selling the fucking. We're selling the out of the store. John Marker was like, it's literally stupid. You should not buy tickets to the store.

I feel like they'd be enjoying. I do it. I do it live. We used to do live and it was just the podcast, but then we were like, okay, we need to give a little more. So for example, we ended with a song. Oh. We added a little like, hey, I know you can always listen to the podcast.

Can you give us a little taste of the song? I'd rather get, I'm trying to get Hassan to sing again. He's saying last time I was on, he's saying he has a beautiful tenor voice. It's astounding how high he can go. He'll always sing Chinese. songs. No, no, I sing We Are Charlie Kirk. If you listen to me, we are Charlie Kirk. If at the end of this, you got a guitarist to come on and you sing We are Charlie Kirk. Yeah. We carry the Well, those are the types of things we're going to do on the tour. Great. Wow.

We'll honor his name. Wow, that's a new key. Yeah, it's a much lower key. Yeah. Now, can you find the note? Do you have enough pitch to do it? Because I don't know. I don't know how to do any of those things. We are Charlie Cook. Oh, wow. But can you do it in chess? Yeah, yeah, that's what you're doing. Let me get the Cologne. Let me get the Cologne.

We are Charlie Cicca. We carry the flame. Hey, look at you. We fight for the God. No, I'm just, I just. But that was the right note. It was. Yeah, I have music in my family.

I don't know how to find it. I feel like he's kind of living your dreams. He tours. Yeah. Tor. I want a nice five stops. You're Italian. I'm Italian.

Yeah. Well, you wish you were Italian? I kind of do. I mean, I, I, I think it's, I think, I people think I'm Italian. Like you thought I was Italian. What is going on? Yeah.

You think, I mean, you think, uh, yeah. Critical tale. Oh, it said, do not shake. Oh. Oh, I thought it said shake. We interrupt this regularly scheduled programming with a very special announcement. Beer and is going on tour to a city near you. San Francisco.

August 21st. Seattle, August 22nd, Portland, August 23rd, Los Angeles, August 23rd, August 29th. We're coming to you. Tour. Dot fearan.com. Tickets are on sale. Catch me live. And my other co-host.

Not just me. I promise. We'll see you there. Tickets on sale. Right. Oh my God. Right at the top of this comment section. Click it.

Buy your tickets. They're going fast. Not bad. Well, let me tell you guys. I had a rough day. What happened? I had a rough day. Tell me about it.

Okay. Well, I flew all the way here from Los Angeles. California. And my flight was delayed. First of all, 45 minutes. Brutal. Terrible. And I tell you what, the beds on the plane were just so just narrow. The beds on the plane? Yeah, the live flat bed was just so obnoxious. The 767 needs to be retired by Delta. I haven't slept in 36 hours. I went to pride. I'm on a bender. Poor guy. I had to come to New York. My hotel room wasn't ready when I arrived. And I've just been, I'm just a little, little exhausted.

So it's been rough for me. But is it, is it the airplane or is it the pride? Did you go hard? I went hard at pride. Yeah, what do we talk about? Don't give him any. What do we talk about? He just gave you the most diva-based story.

Like, oh my God, my lobster too juicy. My steak, my steak too juicy. My bed too bad. My airplane bed too narrow. He just said, my airplane bed too horizontal. His life flat seat on a lot. a fucking aircraft. I know, I know, but shouldn't

airplanes be better in general? That's what is good at an airplane. Listen, I fly a lot. I get it. I'm the, I'm the only one brave enough to criticize the lifelab beds on the aircraft. So it's too narrow.

I'm literally, well, it's too narrow. I am two sizes bigger than you. I'm like twice your size and you will never catch me complaining, especially on camera. Publicly. Especially on camera.

I'm a podcast being like, oh my God, my lifelad bed was so. Yes. Yeah. Well. That's crazy. Well.

That's crazy. I apologize to everybody who had to listen to that. Okay. And then and then he couldn't get an early check-in. Yeah. No, actually my experience was I... I heard you sat in the fucking... I heard you sat in the Delta lounge for two hours.

Four hours. No, no. Two hours on both ends. So four hours total. No, four hours on the first end. And then... So this is what I do. Wait.

Yeah, yeah. Okay, so, tell me. What? I flew. Delta 1. Yeah. It's an experience. It's an experience.

Especially at LAX. So you get there, a bellman meets you at the curb. Extremely friendly. Carries your bags inside. You can drink champagne while you're checking in. Yes. While you're checking it, you're sitting down there serving

you hot towel. Yeah, yeah. I'm like, this is awesome. Christian's like, you ready to go through. I said, no, no, no. Let's have another glass. So we sit there, we enjoy that. We're there four hours.

Why would he want to go through the security? You were there for four fucking hours. Excuse me. then we go through security, up the elevator to the lounge. We just, we sit back, start with a little sushi. I went and got a massage, came back, had some steak freets, right? I haven't done the massage, but it sounds nice. They have a masseuse?

Yeah, and then I took a shower, got in the robe in the shower. You showered. Yes. Wow. I should got in the rope after the shower. You're only allowed to go three hours early. You went four hours early? Yeah, they don't care.

They don't care. Good to know. They looked the other way. They looked good to know. So then I did that. So I did that. And I just got in the robe. I got all clean.

It was time to board. The plane got on the plane. Flight was, you know, I talked about that. Yeah. Get to JFK. There's another Delta 1 lounge. So I land and I'm like, Christian, let's go to the lounge when we land. Hold up.

You didn't have a checked bag? I did. I just left it. You just left it. It'll be there when we get. Because you're not supposed to go back into the lounge when you land. I've done it. I've never done it with the Delta 1.

Yeah, yeah. You can do it. And you just let the bag. You just let the bag go out. No one's going to steal it. No, I hope not. Nobody did. back just spun around and I just said you know what I'm going to have a breakfast so for two hours

oh my god French toast eggs bened wait is this a trip you're complaining about now no no yeah yeah the only part I was I was being that's the crazy trip yeah the part the silly part was just the the flight sucked but everything else was perfect um so the food the french toast eggs benedict anyway cappuccino I went to you know and I had to go to the bathroom because the coffee here just an amazing experience. They took a cabin in New York City, checked in to a beautiful hotel. You and I live on your terrible day? Yeah, I was being, I was

trying to rage bait a little bit. You and I experienced. But it was too narrow. That's the problem. You and I experienced life in the exact opposite ways and March can attest to this and he's probably fucking ripping his hair out right now listening to your luxurious travel experience because March and I, we're fast. We get there statistically at the

latest moment you can get in. Yeah. We immediately make our way. Yes, mathematically it's enough time for the massage or no. No, no no no none of that shit. Oh my God. None of that. None of that shit at all. I'm trying to minimize the amount of time I'm spending inside of the airport. We fucking blow through security. We he always gets he always gets popped and I always get popped too unfortunately. Um, he gets popped. Yeah. Yeah. They always they always look at his dick. No no no. Dude I I literally started to Caroline. I think I have microplats. plastics in my balls or something because every goddamn airport now it pings on my wiener and I look at the thing it's a metal detector not a plastic detector I don't know what's the x-ray one where you do this I don't know what they never wait you don't you have TSA pre no the government took it away from me they took away TSA pre yeah you know that's a fate worse in jail oh my God I got detained they took away my global entry oh my God that's crazy so you can't get clear no you can't I have clear but clear it it he's you

He doesn't have clear, so I don't even use it. Oh, my God. If I lost TSA pre-check, that would suck. So anyway, it don't matter. We time, right? We get in, boom, boom, get on the flight. Do they grope you every time, Marsh? Yes, I get gloped every time.

Is it nice? Well, I don't get it when people complain about it. I mean, I get it if it's assault. To be honest, there's a moment of awkwardness. Personally, I know where you're going on. Personally, I go, fine, a little touch. I know. A little attention.

A little attention. I get it. It's when you can't have time for the massage. That's the first massage. It's a gray area. Like, we don't condone us sold here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I'm just saying it's a great area.

Well, I'm telling you, when you go through that scanner and there's just a big red dot on your shlong on the monitor and you look at the person like... Yeah, and they do back of the head? They have to do this? Back of the hand? Yeah, but they also do like this. They lift it up.

But I don't understand the back of the hand. Because I'm like, do you use the front of your hand. The idea is... That's more intimate to me. What would you have someone like pad here? they're like, oh. Like, who was the guy? They do that too.

Who was the guy at the Department of Homeland Security that was like going through this? And it's like, well, this is going to be an HR crisis if we just do the full cup. So we might as well do. That's the only one I don't. Back of the hand. That's the only one I don't like is the resting bird. Oh, just perch it up? Have they not invented technology to be like, this is a piece?

This has happened three out of my last three travels. Yeah. No offense. Is there anything? Do you have anything going on with your friends? No. I've never had this happen once. I'm the last one, leaving Los Angeles, I literally, I pinged again,

and I looked at the woman and I said, can I just go back through? And she was like, is there something in your pants? And I was like, no, but I just really don't feel like doing this right now. And she's like, go back to that. That's what they said on 9-11. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right. It's true. I really don't feel like doing this right now.

He really felt like doing it. It wasn't even the box cutter either. It was his penis. Yeah. Now, what I was going to say is we fucking go in and out, boom, boom, red eye every time, five hour flight, knock out instantly, wake up, and then early check in, because we get the hotel room the night prior. And check into the room, set up the fucking studio equipment inside of the hotel room, immediately go into fucking podcasts, immediately going to the stream. And then, you know, all systems go.

I've started to realize they need to live a little bit more. My God. Yeah. But you say you'll fall asleep right away. Yeah. See, that's the thing. I'm not a fast sleep for it. I can't sleep at all.

I can't sleep at all. I was awake the whole time. Good bed's rich. Yeah. We're on the same page. Yeah, see, I think you finally, somebody here that understands me. I can't believe both of you guys are complaining about how narrow the fucking beds are.

I'm, you know, both of you side by side is my size. Really? I don't, I mean, we're very lean and you are. I'm sorry. You're broad. He thinks I'm calling him fat. You're not fat. Well, you did present it.

You're broad. It's crazy. You're broad. You did say the two of us combined could fit. Yeah, better in a bed than you could. Yeah. I don't think you were talking about my width, but it's fine, I guess. Anyway, but now we're in mom-distan.

Things are going too well. It looks better than it did last time, I feel like. Everyone's happy. Everyone's found good. It looks cleaner, cleaner. I don't know. Is that me? Or is it just?

Maybe. It's a vibe, though. Maybe we're feeling better. We're throwing shit away. Yeah. People are proud. People are proud to, you know, be a New Yorker. Maybe it's where I'm at.

Am I on a good part of town? Yes. Park Avenue. Yeah. I mean, it's a busy part of town. Right near the, right. Where do you normally go? I don't know where I, I, I, in New York, I have no idea where I am most of the time.

We're fucking dime square girly. We're racist. Uh-huh. Yeah. And we're getting Peter Thiel money. Hey, congratulations. Yeah. Peter Thiel money.

We're racist. We're crypto-fashions. He can help you get into. to where is he? He's in Argentina. He escaped to Argentina. Yeah. That's beautiful this time of year. Yeah. That's what I've heard. It's nice.

I've never been. Yeah. Everyone's happy to, we're all excited to be New Yorkers. Except for last night. Now, by the time you guys watch this podcast, it will be old news. But last night, a demon, a demonic entity decided to ruin the good, positive vibes of New York. He thought New York was on the up for far too long. And that was the officiating crew at the next game.

Well, I was thinking more Donald Trump. Oh, him too. Yeah. He decided to do something that presidents never do, including Barack Obama who loves basketball, who loves the NBA, and has openly not gone to any games during his tenure because of the security theater and the crisis that it caused. Donald Trump, of course, being a New Yorker,

allegedly decided to go he's a new yorker he's invited by dolin the owner of the new york nix who's a piece of shit well we can't say that because we are going to the game four and and they have that advanced camera system he'll fucking get you out of there no i'm like it's more advanced than no dude dolin famously fucking monitors people talking shit about him and the new york nix and will literally use his AI surveillance technology there was a crazy there's i believe there was if i read the article quickly there was there was a trans woman who they basically yes yes flocked her from being able to yes yeah be on TV screen and apparently there was a 14 old in Colorado who was talking mass shit about the New York Knicks and they sent MSG

security sent the local police to his house and the cops were like what do you want us to fucking do he didn't violate any crimes so then in text messages that were revealed they were talking to one another being like well at least we put the fear of God into him by sending the cops there so like they are petty as fuck so I am a little bit more I'm a little worried. I'm a little worried about... By the time this comes out, you already have been to the game. He's got fucking, I don't know.

I am going to continue to be. One of his ops? Yeah, he's got eyes and ears everywhere. You know what I mean? I'm scared. There's multiple cameras in the fucking room. My old debit card was boring, which is why I changed to the cash app card, which is fun. I can customize it and even put my face on it.

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But yeah, Donald Trump decided to purchase fat ass in the owner's box last night, and obviously in fall of fucking sleep, which is crazy. I mean, truly, that's... Unreal. such a disgusting thing to do because canceling every watch party in the city and then falling asleep was I mean that's canceling the watch party outside

of Madison Square Garden. Villanous. Completely rerouting traffic and shutting off businesses in a four block radius around Madison Square Garden and also forcing everyone to come like four hours early,

harassing the players because of the additional security only to fucking get booed during the national anthem which was Really funny. ABC thought and MSG thought they were being sneaky or they were like, these guys won't boo because the national anthem is on. We'll show the president. Oh, I see. And no. New Yorkers were like, fuck that. They were booing him.

It was amazing about one of the Fox News tweets was like, everyone's chanting USA. There's a comment. There's a rumor that they doctored the sound in. Yeah. They piped in the chant. Yeah. Which is crazy. They were saying Bowerns. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Boorins. He also got booed at the watch party in the park. Yeah, he got booed everywhere he was seen. I was booing him. He was getting booted at the watch party. I was at. Oh, you were at a watch party? I was at a watch party.

They boot him at the Hassan watch party. Yeah, the Asan Biker Nix watch party. That's true. That was, it was all fucking. Wow, what a bird flag during the anthem. I, uh, yes. Did he leave the third quarter? He left with.

seven minutes on the game clock remaining. So that is like insult to injury after insult to injury, falling asleep, eating a bunch of fucking French fries and then piecing out before the last quarter is even over. Great. Fantastic. And to make matters worse, while Donald Trump was at Madison Square Garden, because there is a fucking war going on with Iran, Iranian loitering munitions shot down an Apache helicopter near the Gulf of Oman in the Strait of Hormuz. So there was a search and rescue mission taking place

while Donald Trump was fucking farting in his sleep in the owner's box at Madison Square Garden. Well, he's big into sports now. You know, we're going to have the stadium outside the White House, which he says might be permanent now. Yeah. Which is crazy. To have a UFC ring

in front of the White House as a permanent installation. Yes. I... Crazy? No, it's... The sleeping is craziest because it's only going to get worse. I mean, it's only going to just be more sleep. Yeah, you only wake up after that age. Yeah. At some point, it's crazy at 70, whatever it was, 76, 77 to be like your main insult to your opponent is you're sleepy and you are, you're on route to follow suit. No, it's Brandon 2.0. It's fucking unbelievable. It's so annoying. It's the same shit. He's like,

oh, I'm really mad at BB. And then the next day, they're like, I'm doing everything that you want me to do. It's awesome. It's great. That's exactly what happened with Biden too. And they leaked these phone calls on purpose just to be like he was mad. What did he expect was going to happen coming to New York City in Madison's? They elected Zoh. They, you guys elected Zoron. Yeah, yeah, yeah, which I was for. But good. Yeah. I was for Sliwap. But, oh, you know, no, no. Yeah, we we talked about it. No, I was I was for Zoron. But I. Yeah, because he's a New York. I think like I really do think there's a party can't resist. Yeah. He wants to live here or Florida.

I mean, he's a real New York in the sense that he lives in Florida now. Yeah. Yeah. That's a New York thing. But he wants to come back here. He likes that feel. Yeah. Yeah.

I'm sure he's sad. I bet it does eat him up. I bet he wanted to, I bet he wanted to, I bet he wanted, if there was a part of him that was delusional and thought that he was going to get cheered. You know what I think he's going to do now? I surge 100%. In New York City? You guys didn't like me?

Okay, I surge. I can see that happening. I think the problem is all the immigrants. Yeah. I don't know. It's mostly stressful just to be Zoran, and every time you have to thread that needle, whenever Trump comes.

You got to say hi. You got to figure out what to do. That'll make him feel kind of India. I don't think they clear. Zoran didn't go. Did he go? No, he was there. He was in the way back?

Yeah, he's in the nose. Poor Zora. He can't. He can't go up. No. Courtside. Hey, we'd all go. It's okay.

I will go. Court side. No, they would never say it's okay. I'd say it's okay. I know from free buses, but he's sitting court side. No, I know from personal experience that if you're in any way, shape, or form in favor of advancing the material conditions of the working class, you have to literally live with a barrel around your chest. You can't wear any. Diogenes. They literally, they were grilling him. They were like, is that why we cut the part where you complained about how narrow your airplane bed was on the air room? That's why we cut that part. In my private shed. too. I'm changing the upholstery right now, so I'm using a different private jet. You should get a private jet. No, I absolutely not. First of all, why not? Why the fuck would I do that? Yes. Not only do I absolutely care about the environment, but also why the fuck

would I do that? I don't have any need. I travel a lot, but it's we get scared. When I was flying in India, I had to fly and I think it was in the airlines. They had like two crashes in the last year. Oh my God. And I was talking to the promoter and he was like, he was like, he also works with Louis C.K. and was like, oh yeah, Louis was hurt and he's like, get the PJ for this. I was like, why'd you tell me this? I can't get the PJ. I can't get the $10,000 PJ.

I don't know. That's ridiculous. And one seat survived on both crashes the same seat. It was like 11A. Was it? Yeah, he's got playing off. 11A.

787 Dreamliner. I think that pilot committed suicide. Really? I know so. You know so. There's no way that. But that 787 doesn't just fall out of the sky like that. You've heard the recording of the German plane?

Yeah, where they're banging on the conference. door. Oh, that makes me... That, I will say, my biggest fear is pilot suicide. That's my biggest fear. Yeah, when you go in, you really look in their eyes. Yes, so I always, yes. How was your day?

How was your day? We really appreciate you. I think people think... Was your wife being a bitch? No, because I... Are you experiencing it? Or husband. Do you have a relationship with your kid?

Do you have any gambling debt? I will say, I think I need to stop doing it. Because the flight fence are always, I think, a little creeped out. Because every time the cockpit door opens, I'm looking in just to make sure that Nobody tried, like that the pilot, because in the United States, there's a law where one pilot leaves, a flight attendant enters. There's never more than one person in the cockpit. Or excuse me, there's never more than, there's never less than two people in the cockpit. Yeah, yeah.

At any given time. So I'm, what? I've told you this before. Sarah Nelson shouts out is the, is the head of the union. And is like literally the only safeguard against it because airliners want in the United States of America want to change that rule. so that it's cheaper so that they can sometimes fly in like short distance

I mean in their defense first of all it's not safe I could fly the plan by myself but it's not do you ever wonder that though like would they have the technology that they don't need anyone they really don't I mean it's all automated

but regardless this is why they're killing themselves I'm not advocating I'm not advocating for less than two pilots but as long as I'm on the plane I mean I can do it but like what if I died

of a heart attack or you know how to bad piece of airline chicken or something like that, you know, you gotta have two people there. If I ever gonna play in a door anywhere near that cockpit, I'm getting off that plane. You would? I'm a great pilot.

He can actually, he's got logable at flight hours. I mean, I do. Wait, are you serious? Yeah, flight 737? Oh, I was just, I think you were fucking around. No, forgive me. Unfortunately for him, Will Neff and I are the only two people

on this table that is actually flown plane. Yeah, they invented a slur, groundy. Yeah. So they call me, they call me groundy and Yeah, it's true. That's their two slurs for me. Yeah. So here's the thing.

It was my brother's bachelor party, and he has a pilot's license. And he loves airplanes. He builds airplanes. He flies them all the time. So we decided we would go stunt flying. Like we would go to, in Las Vegas, Nevada. You can actually go and engage in dog fighting in a stunt plane. Yeah.

Which we did. Wait, what? A simulated dogfight. Was simulated at that word from the beginning. Well, at least we were actually in a plane. No, no, no, but we were. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, I got that part.

We were flying a real stunt plane. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it has like, um. Oh, dog fighting, like, between planes. Yes. Oh, I thought what you just said in Vegas. Oh, we were dogfighters putting money. You can get in a plane and have two Rottweilers kill each other.

No. The altitude makes it extra pissed off. And then you said simulated and I was like, Who wants to watch that? They can't really enforce it. Okay. No. This is even crazier than that.

Technically, when you really think about it, because they will, in Las Vegas, allow you to, after a certain altitude, genuinely control a stunt plane and engage in dog fighting with your friends who are controlling the other stunt plane, which we did.

And we shot each other down. Pull an absolutely absurd amount of Gs. Yeah, it was fucking awesome. And there's videos of it and whatnot. And Austin was invited to do this. And he revision is history. Damn. Really?

No, no. Jean-Marco, let me set the tone. Let me set the tone. I was at a beautiful suite of the encore in Las Vegas. Beautiful. Yes.

Beautiful. Lady Gaga. Yeah. Lady Gaga, Mayhem Ball. I saw it in Massachusetts Guard. Yeah, she's wonderful.

I was there for a concert. I was there with my boyfriend and ex-boyfriend. And we all went to the concert together. And we, it's crazy. Yeah, I know. Gaze are amazing. I know, we're amazing.

I went to my girlfriend and said, hey, I got a third for this. Yeah. It's my ass. Yeah, no, so we all shared a room, too, but we didn't even have sex. It was great. We have a platonic relationship.

It's amazing. It's beautiful. It's wonderful. So, anyway, he calls me at 2 o'clock in the morning saying that he didn't want to do it and he wants to give me his seat. I was just, I wasn't asleep. It's the phone.

It's 2 o'clock in the morning. I don't want to get up early. That's the story. He knew it was going to happen, and he chickened out. You knew it was going to happen. And to this day, he has refused to fly a plane. We can go anytime and any place.

I can't even get you to the, to go out to eat with me. How am I supposed to get you? I'm down to go to Vegas with you anytime. I asked Marat, he's busy. I don't know what he's doing. No, no, not the simulation, the dog fight. Well, I, it's, we're going to make it a whole thing. They keep moving the goalpost on this, this, this whole situation.

You keep moving. I said I could fly a commercial jet. I don't want to fight, fly a war plane. It's not as a stunt plane. I don't want to do that. It has the same capacity of, I have a passion for commercial flying. Up.

Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached our cruising out. Dude, that's my shit. Not the... Oh my God. When you crank, when you crank like 6Gs, though, it's an incredible experience. When you do a barrel roll, oh my God. It's so tight because you're like, I don't even know what I'm doing right now. You're like, what?

I'm looking up and I'm like, that's the ground. I'm very risk-averse. All these people want to do things that could like, like, for example, want to do things like dog fighting, swimming in the ocean, you know? That's those two dangerous. Austin. What? These are, they want to do crazy things like dog fighting, running outside, saying hello to

strangers in the street. Jaywalking. Bird scooters. People are like, let's do that bird scooter. Fuck you. Yeah, yeah. Austin, you're getting increasingly less dangerous. Bird scooters are incredibly dangerous.

I cannot believe you, your examples were dog fighting and, fighter jets. To be fair. Swimming in the ocean and bird scooters. I did crash a bird scooter last week and almost just cracked my sternum. Yeah. I almost got hit by a bird scooter in West Hollywood. So you're not safe on or off? No, I was pissed. I was pissed. I tried to go after him, but he got away.

I bird scooter a lot, and I was bird scootering, and I kind of bird scooter like an animal, and I was jumping curves. And in Los Angeles, there's all these crack curves, and I jumped one, and I tried to clear a gap to another thing, but there's another crack. my front tire hit, and I just took the pillar of it, right in the sternum. Dude, imagine if it just piked you? Yeah, yeah, it was all bruised, but I had to take a knee and I was holding it. And this old guy came up and started like patting me and he said something in front hand or back here?

He gave me the nesting bird. And he said something really profound. But I didn't understand it because it was all in Spanish. Oh, I thought you were going to give us to what he said. Son of a bitch. I could have been there for you. Yeah. Let me tell you, I got a friend.

His name's Will Neff. You may know him. He's a host on the Fear Ann podcast. And one of my favorite products of his is his hot sauce. And you know what he told me? He said, I sell that on Shopify. I said, Shopify, tell me about Shopify. Electrify me with Shopify.

Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses all around the world, just like Will Neff's. and 10% of all e-commerce in the U.S. from household names like Will Neffs Hot Sauce to brands that are just getting started. Get the word out like you have a marketing team behind you. Easily create email and social media campaigns whether your customers are scrolling or strolling.

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Were you wearing a helmet? No, absolutely. See, these people don't wear helmets. Zoran doesn't wear helmets when he's biking anymore. That's crazy. If something happens, it's already to be a disaster. Yeah. It's fucked up. You cannot, you got to wear a helmet. I had a friend that fell off a skateboard.

Hit his head. Just like that. What? He finished the story. Traumatic brain injury. Oh, is he? He survived. But he survived.

He survived, but he wasn't, he almost died. Wait. Wait. It took so long to, he hit his head. Yeah. Is he a vegetable or not? No, he's not a vegetable. Are you kidding me?

He's walking and everything. He's an engineer. My dad. So the story that you, the warning sign, the story that you gave us was your friend fell and he was fine. No, he got a, he had a traumatic injury. He was on a ventilator for weeks. Oh, wow.

Had to be flown in a private jet. My dad, my dad, my dad used to ride a motorcycle. I had a friend in high school, riding a motorcycle, and then he snapped his finger. And then, but just like that. Just like that. No, he died.

Oh, did he do. In a motorcycle motorcycle? He died. He was, he was like 18, 17. Yeah, so you can't. Motorcycles are another thing I'll never do my dad my dad told me he was like never ever ever ever never I used to not wear a helmet skiing and then I had a buddy go off the side of a run and like disappear And I had to pop my skis off damn

Oh yeah, yeah, I had to find him down the run and he had hit his head and I threw him on my shoulders and I had to Basically hike up the side of this run and call ski patrol and he and like he started to come to afterward and he was like no I'm fine and I was like brother I saw that like like I don't think you're fine. He's like, no, I'm good. And I forced him to go to the hospital and he had cracked his skull from like behind his eyebrow to buy his ear. Oh. Yeah.

So that's what it takes for you to learn. So you couldn't take that lesson and apply it to the bird scooter? I don't. It's got to happen on whatever device the crash. I'll be honest, the snow at least a little softer. Trees aren't. You're not hitting this. I mean, you can't hit the snow too.

And it will at that speed, I feel like it's not going to matter. I don't ski either. Well, first of all, when I was eight years old, I fell off a chairlift. Oh my God. He also took three years of swim classes and it didn't take. Yeah, he doesn't know how to swim. You don't know how to swim.

I don't know. Three years of once a week's swim classes. We don't have a lot of, we don't have very big water culture and where I'm from. Portland, Oregon. Portland, Oregon. We have rivers and stuff, but they're filled with shit. It's called Portland.

Yep. It's the land of ports. We don't swim in those lakes and rivers. That's crazy. It's really hard to understand. Right. I know people can't swim, but it's hard. to understand how that's possible.

I'll be honest. Because it's natural. I don't know how people can swim. It's literally you know, intrinsically, as a baby, you learn to swim inside of the fucking moon. I don't understand how I didn't, it didn't catch.

You think you were just drowning in there? Like all the time, when you were you a kid when this happened? I was. And try it again now. Well, I tried it as an adult, well, almost adult.

Oh my God. Like 16, 17. Yes. And I, we got to take you to a pool. I'll do it. Throw you off the deep end. Wait, will you, will you do it?

Honestly, that'd be great content for the tours if we bring out an above ground pool. That would be really cool. A dunk tank. I love that. A dunk tank. Yes. I'm willing to learn how to swim because I like the occasional cruise. And I think if one of my big, one of my biggest fears is falling off a cruise ship.

Yeah, even if you can't. Yeah, I think. I won't get a balcony room because I'm afraid I'll fall off. Sure. And I think it happens. I don't want to take a remarkable amount. I know. I don't want to take.

the risk. awfully suspicious. I don't go on cruises because I think it's a petri dish and also devastating to the environment. And also I do feel like international waters. Like if someone wanted to kill me, they would take you out. Yeah. Sometimes that would be the time.

Well, yes. I guess. I've never been. They actually are narrowed twin beds and on cruises sometimes. Yeah, I don't love them. You know, yeah. Do you like cruises? I did a couple when I was younger.

It would have to be, I want to go maybe Alaska, like whales. like see whales. Did you ever perform on a cruise on your way coming up in comedy? It's really crazy. I kind of avoided it because they're not great gigs. It's a whole culture. Like there's comedians that they go to cruise, you never see them again. They make a great living.

There's a whole world of stand-up comics who make a solid living that you would have never heard about. Yeah. And it's kind of cool. Yeah. That there is like a mid-level of the industry between mega, whatever. A lot of theater people go. on cruise ships. They make a ton of money. What's your dream comedy gig?

I think I do it. I mean, I don't think it gets better than an intimate club is just as great. You don't want the Dane Cook Stadium show one day? I don't think it would be like fun creatively. It'd be like you'd be excited and you go nuts. But like it's not a good comedy space. It's kind of noisy the whole time.

Yeah. And so the best shows are a tiny little, it could be 50, 100, and they're just wrapped around you. So my dreams, it's done. It's kind of downhill from, where I'm at. How big. Devastating.

It's all about. What's on Town Hill? I think you're a great comedian. Oh, no, no. I just mean like the experience of it. Oh, okay. Like Madison Square Garden, I think would be a nightmare. Okay, you don't want to do that.

I would love to. No, no, you want to do it. You would love to do a comedy special at Madison Square Garden. If I did, if I, Fear Ann, Madison Square Garden, I'd love it. If you drowned Madison Square Garden, I'd love it. If you drowned Madison Square Garden, that would be an incredible show. Like, if I drowned at Madison Square Garden. Yeah.

big dunk tank. Lady Gaga could be there too. Oh, that'd be, if she opened for us. We can lower them in like Lady Gaga at the Super Bowl. She'd be a mermaid while you're drowning. The last thing you see is Lady Gaga as a mermaid. Honestly, I think I could die happy. I love Lady Gaga.

That's incredible concert. God, I love Lady Gaga. She's great. She's the best. I've got to ask you something. Go for it. Because we're talking about Lady Gaga. Why do people think you're gay?

I mean, I think to... Is this uncomfortable for you? No, no, no. Okay. But I think to like... like a gay person is like, well, you're not, because it's the commonality. So they go Lady Gaga.

Yeah. They go, they go, that's gay. Yeah. And when I went, I mean, I leaned in. Yeah. But I was wearing a crop top. You just suck a dick in the back. Yeah, let me get there.

Yeah, yeah. I'm sorry. I'm sitting in the bathroom. Wear the crop top, you have to suck a dig in the Lady Gaga concert. Yeah, of course. Or they'll beat your ass. Of course. No, but it's the same thing.

Like, I would wear nail palette polish more often. Sure. And to me, it's like, that would be just one step too far. Right. Oh, so you think that that would be like... Oh, you're saying he's queer baiting. No, no, no, no.

No, but I have so many other things going on. Is he jailing out? I have so many other things going on. By the way, it's basketball colors. Like, it's fine. Thank you. Mine would be like mayhem ball. Yeah.

Mayhem, you know. So, so that's why. It's just, it's just certain, there's just certain things that I'm into. There's other things that I'm not like particularly, I'm not like a huge camp person. Me neither. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. I don't put with that either. We're going to Rocky Horror while we're in town. It's good. It's good. You've seen it? I was on Shrooms. Which, by the way, not, there's a reason that's not like a Broadway thing to do.

No, it's like, do Shrooms and Broadway. It's a lot. Especially Rocky Horror. It's a lot. Yeah, but that's the right show. You're not going to do Shrooms in Hamilton. It's going to be my first time. It's going to be my first time watching Rock.

How do you do it? I was also my first time, crazy enough because I'm not a camp person. So it's great. I, yeah, I'm not. Luke Evans is like. Oh, unbelievable. I just got on to Rocky Horror. When you said you're not a camp person, I thought you meant outdoors.

No. Oh, the entire time I thought you were a camper. And then I understand. I'm in camp. Like, I'm just not like, I was confused why you brought up Rocky Horror. Neither one of you clocked that he was talking about camp in relation to.

No, I didn't understand why do people think you're gay? I didn't understand why you brought up Rocky Horror, but I just thought, you know, I'll go along with it. Well, I've started to embrace the camp because I've got a boyfriend who's very gay.

And he's a The way you said that Where you said that was the least gay way You could have approached that He's very gay And I met him at first And I was like Oh my guy, he's so hot

And I was like, but he's in theater And I was like, this is kind of He's in theater? He's a theater. What does he do? He's a tap dancer, singer. He's incredibly talented. Wow.

Incredibly talented. And he's pursuing it in L.A.? No, he's doing a TV and film. TV and film in L.A., but his passion is theater, musical theater. And he's great. Believe me. What's his favorite musical?

You know what? I have no idea. Oh my God. That's rough. You don't know your gay-ass boyfriends' favorite musical? Okay. Hades Town. Sure.

Do you know my boyfriend's favorite musical? I think I do. We'll call him on the Patreon and see because I don't, I don't remember it. I don't think it's 80s town. What do you think it is? If I heard it, I'd know it because he said it one time to me and he had it in common with my girlfriend, Caroline, that they both liked it. What's her favorite? I think Carolines is spring awakening.

Yeah, I don't. He got me into the camp stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I started to embrace it. And I was like, you know what? I really like the theater. I really like, I get it. Like I went to, he went to Maine and he performed at Maine State Music Theater,

which is like a regional theater in Maine. Brunswick, Maine. I feel like he's like a Bob Fosse guy, though. I don't think so. Really? Mm-mm. It sounds like you don't know him. I don't know.

Yeah. Will knows him better. I feel like if you want to ever Those tap dances I'm so sorry I love them for more than that Come on three years can't get you And ask you know we have to love somebody

It's a certain point You know what I mean? You know Who are you defending this time? Show me a hot guy I'll show you a guy I'll show you a guy that's tired of fucking him You know what I mean?

What the fuck It's nice to hear about a man You ever heard that saying? I have about women so Frankly it's refreshing Happy Pride Month Yep Happy Pride Month

Men would be ejectified too We're breaking down walls right now. Speaking of Pride Month, what I was going to say is, if you ever want to defeat the queer baiting allegations, start wearing suits. Because I've realized that the number of people that are like, this guy's gay or at least bisexual,

has gone down dramatically since I started my suit era. Are you saying gay people don't wear suits? They do, but I don't think people perceive you as gay when you wear a suit. 100% of the people that wear a suit. 100% of gay people, fuck. You're killing. Austin, I'm not saying gay.

gay people don't wear suits. I'm saying people stop perceiving you as gay or queer when you wear a suit. You know what? You're right. I look at Anderson Cooper sometime. I think it also depends on the suit. I think when you're bringing kind of Ivy League frat star right here. Oh.

News desk. Like, nobody ever thought you were gay. So what is it, wishful thinking? Actually somebody at the gay bar literally this weekend was like, is he gay? Was he at the gay bar? Yes. Okay. No, no, no. He was talking. They came up to me. They said, where is the sign? You know? And, uh, and, uh, and so. He gets so mad. He gets so mad to get more. Yeah. Yeah. They, they come. Some people come up to me and they like, you do that podcast. You're so mad to get more play than you. Well, you didn't, he didn't come out to. Yeah, because you didn't want us. Okay. Let's be very clear. Hold on. Let's be very clear. Sunday about this. We were supposed to go to pride. I even like hired security. Okay. That's how serious you're going to shut it down like Trump.

I made it. They shut down the pride break for us. I know. Yeah, he was going to go and fall asleep. Yeah. Yeah, it's not for me. He's tweeting French fries. Yeah, it's not for me, but I'll still be there.

Anyway, we're supposed to go. He's in the third quarter. We're supposed to go. Austin is like, oh, we got this at 3.30. Can you come in four? He was busy. He was interviews. Yeah, he was like, he like pushed it back.

And Iran and Israel had, you know, restarted their war. So I was already doing coverage on it And basically Austin told us not to come No, no Austin did not want us to come I was out at the

I was enjoying my pride Yeah And I said you know And now we know I said normally I don't work on these weekends That's what I said Yeah Yeah I don't work on this weekend So he said we'll do a pride

On his channel I said you can have this one I'll be there And he I had to I had to make some schedule changes But at the end of the day He could have not shown up by the way But he has to be there

No no he couldn't have done it without me. That would have been very strange for Hassan Piker to go to Pride without his token gay friend. Are you kidding me? I'm the only thing. Token gay, he has many gay friends. No, he doesn't. Name one. Name another one. Name another gay person. Yes, other than me, other than me that virtually everyone around me is gay. There is not a, there is not a gay person. I'm not going to docks my gay friends. There is not. I want a list of every gay person. No. Piker list. Are you serious right now? You think me, living in West Hollywood for a decade,

don't know an extensive amount of queer people. Well, look, I know more queer people than I know straight people. What the fuck are you talking about? Let me be clear. You aren't closer to another gay person. I'm the closest gay person. But the word token means that he only has a single gay Friday and he parades you around. In my defense, I didn't know what that meant.

I just used it. It sounded like it was correct. So I didn't mean that. You do have, you do have gay friends. I'm just saying, I'm your closest. That's what I thought token meant. I'm the closest gay friend to you. You thought token meant that?

You're my token friend. So, like, I thought it was like the shining one, like the best one. Oh, I see. Like a token. Yeah. Who is, is, who, who's, I have a lot of normie gay friends that, you know. Whoa. Were they going to come to the bride?

they were definitely at pride yes were they going to be with you on camera maybe you wouldn't do that to me yes i would you wouldn't you i was i they're going to stop coming up to him in the gay bar and asking about you if you do that i i'm finding out for the first time yeah but were you going to be on a floor were you going to bring up on a flow to just a while i was just going to i was just going to i was going to bring them out in fact i you know what's crazy is you didn't show up but i was telling everybody about that you were going to be there too i was i was out I was out in the street. No, it's because he wants gay people to hate me.

No. So that he can take the top slot. No, no. But people were coming up to me and they're like, oh, you know, Austin said, Hassan's going to be here later. They're like, oh. And then they look at me and they'd be like, I'm your, you're my favorite.

That's what they'd say to me. That's what they'd say. I don't believe that. I don't believe that. I heard some of the performers at the actual, like, concert for Pride struggled a little bit. What happened? Well,

the pussycat dolls. performed, which I was very excited about. Recently off canceling their full tour, right? Wait, they canceled their tour? Just to do pride. Yeah, no, their tour wasn't selling their well, so they canceled the whole thing. Yeah, and I actually, I want to defend the Pussy Cat Dolls because I think that West Hollywood Park is not an easy venue to play in.

Right. It's outdoors, the crowd is like spread out. There's loud club music from all the gay bars like surrounding you. It's hard to focus as a live performer. myself. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right.

You know how it is. Yeah. You tour, right? Yeah. When you're in front of it. Sometimes four stops in a row. Yeah. Yeah.

But you don't have, you know, you can feel, but you can feel when you lose control of the room. Of course. Right. Yeah.

Imagine West Hollywood Park, you never have controlled that. Right. Venue. So, Plet of Dolls, it was hard for me to get into it. But you know who I really

fucking loved? Who? Jade. Oh. Jade was incredible. Oh. I don't really know. Do you know, no, Jay?

I forgot the words. A little more? Yeah. Clearly you didn't get into it enough. I forgot the words. This is the song I'm talking about. It was, it was, um, Angel of my dreams. Did it.

Oh, that doesn't sound anything like we. Wait, ready? Okay. All right. Putting us on. Anyway, amazing performance. Okay. I didn't know who she wasn't.

That's incredible. That's amazing. Yeah, that's great. On that note. Yeah. I think we move behind the paywall. Yeah, Jean-Marco, is there anything you'd like to tell our audience at home?

I list my podcast, The Downside. Yeah. And come on some time next time of year. It sounds like you're busy with the second you get to New York. Are you kidding me? I'll clear something. He has nothing going on in his life ever. I would love to come on your podcast.

He did, I've had it earlier today. I hip news, actually. Or I hip news. I condemned him on it. And he talked mad shit about me. Oh, every time I go. We'll talk behind.

We'll talk behind the paywall. You need to learn your, your partner's favorite musical before. I'm going to call him on the Patreon. Patreon.com slash fear. And we're going to find out what Christian's favorite musical is and a lot more. Patreon. com slash fear.

And we'll see you behind the paywall. See you later. Peace. But somebody will meet and I'd love to hear your, what year did you graduate? Um, 2024. Jesus Christ. Yeah, well fuck off. Okay, what's your favorite musical?

We're trying to find out. Can I guess? Can I guess? Hades Town. Yeah. No. Thank you. Okay, give me some hints, and I'll get it. 2008.

Okay. The writer of the book is truly one of the gayest people to ever exist. That doesn't narrow it down. Probably when a Jonathan Groff's like most iconic goals. Oh, so it's Spring Awakening. Yeah. Oh my god! You were right!

You were wrong! That's crazy. Babe. No, Christian is his boyfriend now. I thought it was hated.