Fear& - Hasan, Slime, QTCinderella & Atrioc Get It Twisted | Fear&TakingBackWhat'sOurs

Episode Date: November 29, 2022

Today we have the nightmare blunt rotation as our cast with the all-star lineup that is Hasan(Host and Bald Chaser), QT(Host?), Atrioc(Capitalist) & Slime(Bald). Not really sure why I thought to tweet out this group but I realize now I can tweet podcasts into existence from the official account so that's kinda lit. Anyway topics today include, taking back what's ours, tricking out Ludwig, gambling and why you should do it, QT's questionable relationships and more.🎉BONUS CONTENT🍾 🌟PATREON - https://www.patreon.com/FearAnd🎧 AUDIO PLATFORMS - https://linktr.ee/fearand♥ follow our guests! ♥Slime : https://twitter.com/slime_machineAtrioc: https://twitter.com/atriocQT: https://twitter.com/qtcinderella✰ follow the boys! ✰Hasan: https://twitter.com/HasanthehunWill: https://twitter.com/TheWillNeffMarche: https://twitter.com/MarcheFear&: Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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For free assistance, call the Connex Ontario helpline at 1-866-531-2600. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. you could you could get started we just we like to let's call it wine about it yeah no why no this is not you don't even need to be on just pretend it's like we've never been on a podcast before like what the fuck strange, nobody asked you to be on the podcast? You literally used to have a podcast. And I was on your podcast. Yeah, I was,

wait, what's, what's this podcast? The Yard. Oh, that's a, oh, that's a cool name.

You like that one? Yeah, that's a good one. We whinged about it for a while. What's your guys' name of your podcast? It's called Fear And. Welcome to Fear And,

ladies and gentlemen, everybody. That's so bad. That's right. It's ending with like a, an ampersand. Right. Oh, so bad. That's right. It's ending with like a... An ampersand. Right. Okay.

So it's simple. You could also say like it's Fear Ampersand. And the SEO is miserable. It's like a hashtag. Guys, a lot of people don't believe me, but I have a co-host. His name is Will Neff. Okay. And he died in a self-sucking accident.

So, you know, rest in peace. But it was his wish to change our name from Fear and Malding, which was also not good. I liked Fear and Malding. I think it's fine. It was all right. Also, can I be Will Neff? I've never seen an episode, but I'm pretty sure I can nail it.

You can. Do the voice. Do the voice. Do the thing. Okay, not bad. Not bad. It's just a modified. No, that was bad.

She liked it. No, I didn't like it. It's like a modified Steve-O. And my Steve-O is really good. I'm trying to gas you up. Yeah, dude. I'm trying to gas you up. I'm trying to gas my guests up.

We have guests today. We have a real co-host of the podcast cutie cinderella hey she's back in the building i am i am not signing up till they change the name okay i'm not signing up to change the name i thought you had a big announcement you did a lebron james you did a the fucking the grim reaper the grim reaper of podcast marsh tweeted that marsh was like official co-host of fear and i was like whoa bitch yeah no we're just fucking around? Yeah, he lies all the time. We're changing the name. We're changing the name. I've been podcasting since all you were in diapers, bro.

You know that? That's true. I think I'm old. We might be the same age. I'm 32. I was one years old and you were already doing a podcast. He was out of diapers at that point. It was the baby shit podcast.

And we talked about all kinds of stuff. We talked about the little rattle. We liked that one a lot. Fucking little goo goo, little gaga. Yeah. There was the mobile.

That shit was the episode. The whole mobile arc was nuts. The subreddit went crazy for that one. What kind of cries are better for titty time? Yeah. This is, that's Marketing Mondays, dude.

How to latch. Yeah. You know how to latch. Everyone knows how to latch. Wait, what is latching? It's when you suck on the breast as a baby, Hasan. Oh, that's it. Okay, got it.

I just said. You know, like a plunger. You hit R1. You went scientific with it. I was saying titty time, which is what I thought. Okay. Well, do you not get scientific on fear ampersand? No, we do not get scientific on fear ampersand. No, we do not get scientific on fear ampersand.

Actually, we do. What do you do on this podcast? We do zero politics. Also, speaking of lying and liars, we have Atrioc here. Marketing. Why don't you want the two of us? I have so many questions, which is great. Yeah, there's a lot of questions.

Randomly, I don't know what you're like. Atrioc, big A, or slime, big A episode. Yeah. So, that's because Marsh, our producer, he tweeted that. And I was like, okay. It just came to me. Yeah. The Troy and Obed of Twitch.

Yeah. I did not even, I didn't even consider it. But like, I like you guys. So I was like, why not? You know what I mean? Hassan struggles with guests. Because it's literally a one-man operation okay on the guest booking side to help you i'm literally every week i'm like would you like to come on the podcast

and then you know i just trick out your boy like that you do trick out ludwig like you yeah you turn him out like he's like he's working the red light oh 100 he's a nasty little guy he's so good he's so good he does a little dance he doesn't's so good. He's so good. He does a little dance. He's got a little charm. He doesn't like no other. Yeah, he's so good. He does bring his smiles. He told me, I was like, I need Hasan to do my Christmas play. And Ludwig was like, he owes you.

And I was like, why? And he's like, I do so much for him. I was like, okay. What? There's no transitive property. No, there is. Apparently, it's transactional. Yeah, no, it doesn't work that way.

Ludwig is my word. You do a lot for me as well. He was grinding for her gear. Yeah. Yeah, oh, it doesn't work that way. Ludwig is my... You do a lot for me as well. He was grinding for her gear. Yeah. Yeah, oh, okay. Very kind of him. That's why he was tricking it out. Yeah.

And that nasty little slut. Stop it. You stop it. Listen, okay. It's only I can call him that. It's a snare drum. Anyway. Last but not least, we have Slime.

Whoa, it's me. Slime-ers. Yeah. I'm your friend. This is... That's cool. I mean, you've been here before. I've been here before. You laugh, it's me. Slimers. Yeah. I'm your friend. This is, yeah. I mean, you've been here before. I've been here before. You laugh, you lose.

That was fun. We laughed at animals farting. Oh, yeah. Which was great. I laughed at anything. Classic. No, she laughed at XQC saying Cheeto. And also a lot of Germa, too.

Germa's funny. She's like really. I have high taste. Yeah. The office in Germa yeah she has patrician tastes that we couldn't access which is good no i'm like laughing only at animals farting and children being hurt you guys also laugh at vomit and poop dude the monkey the gorilla eating his own vomit yeah was so good i love a poop too much you love a poop too much

you're telling me what i do too much. You love to poop too much. You're telling me what I do too much. Yeah. Okay, you watch Community too much on stream. You watch Community on stream? Oh, you are so getting banned. I'm telling Twitch. I'm not getting banned.

I'm literally, I am going to DMCA. You're tattling? I'm going to do a fake DMCA on you. Crimeous. Oh, let me DMCA, man. Check him PC.

Yeah. No, but that's like a thing that happens on Twitch all the time. You message your partner manager and get me banned? Yes. That'd be so funny. You should do that for the meme.

Yeah, I'm going to do that now. He deserves nothing. No, this motherfucker is like talking politics and stuff. I don't like it, dude. He's coming to my territory. He's coming to my territory. I'm eliminating you. I'm eliminating the competition.

He's undercutting me, dude. Yeah. I'm ruthless. You're going to slip up one day. It's Monday. You have to do marketing Mondays,. Ruthless. You're going to slip up one day. It's Monday. You have to do marketing Mondays, by the way. You're going to say something racist someday. You're just going to make a take. How would I slip up?

You're going to have a dog shit take because I know what you really think, bro. I know what you really think about your Nvidia stocks and the poor. I know everything what you think. What do I think about the poor? Why are you leaking his private conversations conversations which i've heard as well well that's a great question to saw the reason why i'm doing it is because it's time to take

back what's ours yeah you're a hero you're here for doing that we were trying to board a fucking flight and he kept saying we're gonna take back what's ours hey you know the code word i would i would walk by him on the aisle be like like, the trigger phrase is ravioli. He's literally talking like a fucking terrorist. And he looks, you know, he's skinhead. What? What do you mean? He's literally.

Whoa, dude. You're being messed up right now. That is fucked up. Slip up number one. If I'm judging, then how about the lady next to me who's hearing him say the trigger phrase over and over. To be fair, though, you would never, like, no one would ever suspect you of being a terrorist.

It's the perfect crime. Yes. You're only encouraging him now. Statistically speaking, yes, like, white guys are way more likely to do it. Here's the thing. What I was doing, I was also getting on the plane. I'd be like, H-Rock, we're going to go up in the sky and we're never likely to do it. Yeah, he's fit for profile, dude. Yeah. Here's the thing.

What I was doing, I was also getting on the plane. I'd be like, H-Rock, we're going to go up in the sky. We're never going to come down. We're going to be there forever and ever. We're never coming down. We're going to be in the sky forever and ever and ever and always be together in the sky. You were like DTSA and everything. Yeah.

It was great. It was great. I'm a fun travel guy. We travel together. You were actually my boy. You actually did cover my ass. I do appreciate that. That's cool.

We're buds. Where did you guys go recently that you were? Really? We went there for a. Oh, ew. I do appreciate that. That's cool. Where did you guys go recently? Philly. We went there for a... Oh, ew. I'm sorry to hear that, man. A party. A party thing.

Oh, okay. It was like eight LA actors, and we all flew six hours to do it in Philly. Oh, yeah. That's literally why Will wasn't here for one of the many weeks that he hasn't been here. Do you not know where your wife goes when she leaves the house? No, I'm a cuck, dude. I'm literally... She's also a bit of a whore. I'm just letting him trick himself out

in the streets. I'm getting turned out tomorrow night. Is that a good will? You're getting closer. I'm getting closer? I have to practice. Hassan! I can't make it this weekend, dude. I'm getting tricked out. My XQC got really good.

There's a guy on TikTok who does an amazing XQC. How does it go? He's like, oh, do it. Chat, chat. Wait, wait. Do I stay? Do I go? You made him Italian.

I'm choking. You added like an Italian. Italian XQC. Can someone just like an Italian. Italian XTC. Can someone just make that already? Italian XTC. Someone should do that. Do, do, do, do. The ham and pasta.

50,000 viewers in Italy. What? Yeah. What the fuck is the point of your podcast? Yeah, actually. Is it just a podcast? I thought it was politics. We don't do any politics on it.

Okay, so it's a safe zone. It's literally, I mean, what the fuck is the point of the yard? It's nothing. Well, the nice thing is the yard has a theme you know you you look at it and you're like oh it's a bunch of guys in a yard for your end i'm like is this a spooky podcast listen every every single podcast okay every single podcast ultimately when you when you rip it down to its skeleton is just a bunch of fucking narcissistic dudes talking to one another about dicks and shit. About dicks and farts.

Not whine about it, okay? Yeah, well, it's not existent. Narcissistic women, please. Because, yeah, and guess what happened? How'd that go? We did talk about dicks and cum, though. You did, all the time. That's when I tuned in.

You captured my attention. None of you have swallowed cum the way we have. That's when I tuned in. You captured my attention. None of you have swallowed cum the way we have. That's not true. Tell him. Tell him. My boy can explain everything. Go on. I'm listening.

I didn't swallow cum. What's wrong with that? What is this guy? I told you he's problematic. I told you he's problematic. That's so messed up, bro. Oh, swallowing cum is political now. Yeah.

Wow. Wow. All right. Atriox Shapiro. Sorry, we're not supposed to get political. Yeah. No, I mean, you can get a little political. Is Shapiro pro or anti-swallowing cum?

I think he's definitely anti. Anything that's like fun for either party involved, Vince Shapiro is going to be against. Well, I mean, he's pro-life and it does start with the semen. Yeah, it's got to go somewhere. I wonder if Ben Shapiro has ever gotten a blowjob. Yeah, you think he'd start crying when it happened? He's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

This is too good, hypothetically speaking. I like this a lot. The tongue is too much. No, I just like, there's no way he just lives life his life is so mid that's that that's the only way to describe it like he just seems like a very regimented very boring guy yeah it is funny when your brand is to be a mid guy that sucks and it's like well what do you like really though and it's like oh no let me tell you yeah i'm just more mid but also at the same time he plays like the violin, I think. Well, people, I've heard from people that he's like actually kind of chill to hang out with,

which I don't believe. I feel like that's a... People that Ben Shapiro's kind of chill to hang out with? Yeah, like I... So interesting. I forget who the fuck told me, but like, I guess like when he gets loose. Oh, wow. So he becomes like a normal person, I guess when he gets loose. Oh, wow. So he becomes a normal person, I guess.

So your expectation is so low of him from seeing him on his show that you're like, there's no way this dude's going to even be funny. It's like, you know what? Hey, blowjobs are all right, man. You guys are cool. It's like, I got to catch my flight, though. I got to catch my flight. Pretty good.

I like blowjobs, too. Yeah. Hold on. The Yard, let me tell you something about podcasts. Yes, blowjobs, too. Yeah. Well, hold on. The Yard, let me tell you something. Okay, go ahead. About podcasts, yes. But let's zoom out. I want to know the purpose of your podcast in general.

Because the purpose of The Yard was for Ludwig to get his friends money. That was it. And also, we had talked about it way before he even blew up. We were like, we live together. We should start a podcast because we're fucking white males. And so we ended up doing it. They are. They are all white.

Yeah. We are white males. Really cool did we ended up they are they are all white yeah we are white men italian well yeah and i'm german do not do erasure do not do erasure he's a poc he is he's both bald and italian that's two yeah he's a disability activist and and a person of color and so so that was the point but for you, is it just literally this is what you do, and so we do it? Or is there love here? Do you have love for the game? Yeah. I mean, I love talking.

That's my favorite thing. That's real shit. Well, for me. You actually must love talking. Listen, it's a work in progress. Dude, I have two podcasts. Yeah, I have this, and then I have Leftovers with Ethan. And then you shoot 18 hours a day.

And then I, yeah. I love talking. I legitimately don't get it. I actually this and then I have Leftovers with Ethan. And then you stream 18 hours a day. And then I, yeah. I love talking. I legitimately don't get it. I actually don't. I wanted to ask you on this podcast, what motivates you to do that? I just, I love it. Straight up. There is literally no reason for me to do this much.

No, there isn't. Well, then when I tune into your stream, it doesn't look like you're enjoying it. No, I enjoy it. He loves it. I love it. You love it? I love it so much. I asked him, when I was here, we were doing YLYL. I asked him it. No, I enjoy it. He loves it. I love it. You love it? I love it so much. I asked him, when I was here, we were doing YLYL, I asked him on stream, and I remember

this. Every time I watch a song or whatever, it'll pop up, I think about this moment. So I was like, well, what are you going to miss when society collapses? And he's like, this. That's fucking cool. And I was like, that's so sweet. And then I looked at the chat just scrolling, and it's like, it's you guys. Yeah, his chat is also very sweet

I mean there's some not to me not to me they're not they're pretty sweet yeah they're sweet to you it feels combative I only say this on the pod because I listen

and then they come and they drop their primes they're like oh and so I love them they're comedians no they are they're very nice they're definitely very nice

like I but they're nice because I fucking scream at them all the time otherwise like 30, 000 fucking children and adults that behave like children you're never going to get them to behave normally unless you yell at them all the time which is what i do but yeah no i i love it i i think that it is uh it's perfect for me like i have a i have a sense of community um i i have a sense of community. I have a sense of purpose. I get a lot of fulfillment out of it.

Have you ever thought of just joining a church? What? No. That's a good question. You should just go to church. We're just talking about Jesus Christ, our Lord. Anyway, let me tell you about the Church of Latter-day Saints. They just patched it recently.

We did. We got a new patch. I shouldn't say we. The gays. We did. We got a new patch. We patched what? I shouldn't say we. Well, the gays are okay now. Yeah. Yeah, it's a big deal. Speaking of churches, I got a church specifically. Can you re-roll into gay or do you have to like, is there like a gay like quartermaster

and you have to like spend your LDS points? I think it depends on if you went to byu or not yeah yeah yeah the byu quartermaster says it's okay no yeah they decided okay it's like okay now except for it's like not okay but it's like okay it's very it's very nuanced it's like you can be gay but we'll judge the fuck out of you but you can be gay and we say we won't judge the fuck out of you. This was the Pope? That's how... The Mormon Pope? His name is Neil?

In Mormonism, you have a prophet. It was a really fun conversation one time with my sister and I. We were driving to Colorado for a Taylor Swift concert, of course, and we're in the car and I was like, sister, don't you think it's interesting that the prophet always seems to be based off of tenure and seniority? She's like, no, he's chosen by God. I'm like, sister, don't you think it's interesting that the prophet always seems to be like based off of tenure and seniority? And she's like, no, he's chosen by God.

I'm like. God loves the oldest, whitest man in the room. I'm like, that's so strange. I was like, that's interesting. And she's like, why would they do it if they don't get paid? Why would they why would they serve the Lord? And I was like, number one, they do get paid and also fame. And being remembered forever and everything a white man wants it's kind of like the streaming of god it is yeah i mean

of the mormon church or hassan well for me it's like i'm the prophet of vibes yeah that's it that's it. That's it. I just, you know. You're the prophet of vibe. That's it. No, no, no. He is. No, I am. I just like to have fun and talk about the news and then have fun. That's it. What are you the prophet of besides watching Community Season 3?

Watching Community, baby. Season 3, Season 4. Lying, dude. Lying, which is what I want to talk to you about. Because marketing is a lie. That's what it is. What do you mean it's not a lie? It's quite literally built on lies. The entire purpose of marketing is a lie. That's what it is. It's quite literally built on lies.

The entire purpose of marketing is a lie. Yes. No. You want 100%. What if one product is better than the other? And you say that it's better. Lie, lie, lie, lie. Sorry.

I didn't even mean to do that. Oh my God. I can't counter that amazing argument. The only... Yeah. That was awesome. Dude, you fucking owned him, dude. Every point of mine demolished.

No, wrong. Lie, lie. Yeah, no, I mean, it is. Okay, well... Can you actually expand on that? Yeah, I... I feel like you're trying to razz him, which is fun. Not on your side right now.

I don't... It can be a lie, like anything, but it doesn't have to be a lie. You might get a kick, you piece of shit. I think for the most part it's like it's about creating demand where there is none that's a successful

marketing campaign bro if you're gonna buy one pair of sweatpants no matter what and then this one says it's cooler and it makes you feel cooler and you like it more

then yeah you're not buying it for utility all of a sudden you're buying it because it's like it created but you like it more

because there's that brand because the marketing makes you think but you're happier with the sweat's that brand. Because the marketing makes you think... But you're happier with your stuff. But that's manipulation. Gentlemen, gentlemen, gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen,

we are all selling some form of evil, right? True. You're selling the idea of having a friend in the screen. You're selling the idea of being intelligent

to college kids. My toes on OnlyFans. Right. Toes on OnlyFans. What do I sell? Well, I don't take part in this. What? What? what yeah you do you guys do the worst version of that

you're like you're literally fake like you're above it you are offline you are offline TV for like kids that luckily are not becoming school shooters because they I like it I like where he's going I just need you to back it up one sentence and I'm on board.

Okay, you are offline TV for like the extended Ludwig universe where you guys are having friendships on camera and they're a part of it. They're like, oh, these are my friends that are hanging around. So I used to watch One Direction and I'm like, I could be their friend. You're like that that but for not white girls probably and then slime undercuts that every time he tweets he's like do not look at me do not write at me do not i do not like you i have to i have to do it to sleep at night because i truly

believe that but i'm also taking a bite of the cookie machine yeah you are so it's like cookie machine ludwig has said i i get to have it all because I get to be evil and tell people that I don't fucking want to talk to them, which is true, but I also get to benefit from the system and I'm like,

yeah, bitch, I figured it out. Exactly. I'm the goat. And yet here we are shitting on Atrioc. Huh? Yeah, here we are

shitting on him instead. Oh, you call me a piece of shit. Please talk into the mic. That's why I call you a piece of shit. First day I met you. I don't even remember

i don't even remember what it was for it was because you saw me checking my youtube stats started before that though that was on that dinner there was a couple things that happened before that led to that moment where i was just like edger is a bad guy oh wow it's like christmas for me you guys have no idea i don't even remember what it was. I remember the dinner vividly, and it was him and Mizkif arguing about who had higher viewership. It was like, I have 30K. I have 31K. And I was like, okay.

I think we all know who won that argument. I didn't want to deal with it, bro. And then I'm checking my YouTube when he comes over and goes, I love that he's a bad guy. He's like, I didn't want to deal with it. He said, that's why he left. No, you have to pee, dog.

It's fine. I was hopping to the same thing as shit. What was his dinner for? What was it after? Anime con, I think. Oh, yeah, because you were all weaved up. Yeah. Which is, I mean, it was great.

So what turned you around on A-Track? Or is that not happening yet? Oh, no, it's not even real. I'm just fucking with him. I don't actually think he's a bad guy. See, that's the difference. That's the difference. When I say I don't like someone, I fucking mean it,

especially on the mic, bro. No, I mean, okay, there's like actual people that I don't like, which I'm very open about, but I'm just like fucking with him when I say he's a bad guy. I was just hoping that nothing had changed. I love the Raz you. You're fun to Raz. I was just hoping that nothing had changed. I love the Raz you. You're fun to Raz. I appreciate that.

If you didn't have so much fun, you know, getting told the trigger phrase on an airplane, I wouldn't do it. But I want you to know that. You never got me a 4090, which is also another reason why you're a bad guy. Give me one. We're actually kind of pissed. I have one. Shouts out to Starford Systems.

Not an ad. They know where their bread's buttered. Yeah. They were like, we'll just send you one. Shouts out to Starforge Systems. Not an ad. They know where their bread's buttered. They were like, we'll just send you one. Starforge, DM me. Sent you a fucking pallet that you had to get a forklift to open it with? Dude, it is insane. It is insanely large. It's entirely too large.

Because of how large it is, they need to now make new motherboards and new cases, I think, in the future. Yeah, it's too large. It's a big one. They need to, because of how large it is, they need to now make new motherboards and new cases, I think, like in the future. Yeah, yeah. Because it takes up

too many slots on the motherboard. Like, I can't use multiple capture cards. Cutie's about to say that it's an issue also of PCIe lanes, which, you know,

X24 with an Intel system, it's not going to be enough eventually, right, Cutie? Apparently, it's also lighting on fire. You can say that as well. Well, let's not say that. Well, it's cool.

You don't work there anymore, bro. Let your nuts hang. Yeah, but he's still got stock, probably. You still got stock? You didn't sell yet? I still got some stock. Ah, $40.90.

I just bought stock in diabetes medicine. Go fuck yourself, actually. Wait, you did? Wait, fuck this bitch right here. What is this podcast? No! Come on, this fucking podcast. Yes, yes, yes of sleep bro i'm fucking every once in a while i go into my robin hood and i look at my fucking amazon stock that this motherfucker told me to buy he was like he was like he's

wearing an enron hat he's like buy it it. It's only going up. And I'm like, okay. That's not what I said. This is so not what I said. This is the most uncharitable. No, no, no, no. What else did he say? He said, I have some insider information. He said those words. It was very weird. I said, get into FTX early.

I didn't kind of hold. Oh, I did. I said, get into Doge, FTX, and fucking whatever Elon Musk is doing. So I get my Amazon stock when he encourages me to do so. Bro, she came to me and said, all I'm doing is buying Coca-Cola stock. Like a 98-year-old. No, bitch.

Like you're Warren Buffett. And I was like, well, that's kind of like an old person thing. Maybe buy something else. That's all I said. Is Warren Buffett not happy? And he's also really rich and also goes way up.

So I was dead wrong. Yeah, you were. Yeah. Do you see that number? Yeah. Okay. I've dead wrong. Yeah, you were. Yeah. Do you see that number? Yeah. Okay. I've lost nearly $6,000

off of Amazon. That's a lot of money. You did one sports stream yesterday. That's more than that. This is why I do not participate in the stock market. Oh, what? No.

You guys should just gamble at the casino. Way more fun. You want to talk about gambling losses? Yeah, I would love to. Yeah, let's do it. Let's talk about gambling. I just got back from Vegas.

I heard you went up. So first, yeah, I did. I did. Let me tell you. So when I go, I go with a host, right? So there's the expectation that I have to gamble an amount of money that at least he's giving me for free in comps. Like that's the way I think about it.

And like I min max it though. So like everything I touch, I'm immediately giving my putting my card down like my casino card down. You know what I mean? Gold member. Not a big deal. He just keeps flexing. No, no, no. It's not even a foot.

Wait, first of all, it's not even a foot. I have lost so much more money than you will ever lose gambling and i still don't have a host yeah well it's the flex it's not even like streets bro it's not even a flex because it's like i am i'm like literally min maxing like i'll be like should i do 25 hand blackjack like what where can i sit the longest on a table and have the camera fucking see me playing? Yeah. So it looks like I'm like trying to lose money at least, but failing to do so. You know what I mean?

So I do that. And usually I'll be like, OK, this trip, I'm going to I'm going to I'm getting five thousand dollars worth of like entertainment, food, all this shit. So I'm going to spend five thousand dollars like that's the way I see it. My parents have never been to Vegas. I brought them, you know, we got a nice little suite and all this shit, you know what I mean?

You know, car service, yada, yada. He's like really pulling out all the stops. Yeah, my dad's fucking hookers. They're like literally there, by the way. They can hear us. On the roof, screaming. Yeah. They've never fucking stopped.

Screaming! No, they want parents shit. Like, they wanted to see Cirque du Soleil. So we went to the O show. And, you know, massages and mani-pedi. Wait, isn't the O one like the sexy one? I don't think anything Cirque du Soleil is sexy. No, there's a Cirque du Soleil where they get naked.

I'm sitting next to him. I don't think so. Also, that would be impressive. I'll wrap it. That would be impressive. No, stop. Dude, he's Turkish. What are you doing?

Do not ask his dad if he got hurt. No, you're not doing that. He's going to the bathroom and pretending. That's insane. If we push him, he'll do it. But I thought there was a Cirque du Soleil where they're naked and their genitals bend. My dad is a college professor who is Turkish and does not speak English deliberately. Deliberately. Okay. Anyway. What was his answer anyway that was insane i closed that door too please man oh geez oh geez he ruined it anyway so we did like the spa

um you know that sort of stuff like just a basic like package you know nice dinner he loved the show. Oh, okay, good. Thank you for clarifying. Loved it. Yeah. He was stiff. But I went in with that, with the idea that I'm going to spend like five grand, you know, and I'm going to spend like five grand over the course of the entire weekend. And then I didn't. I took out a thousand the first night. I gambled. I won. I was up.

And then I lost all of it the second day. So I took 2,000 other extra dollars. I was like, all right. Fireback, second barrel. You know, I'm burning through it. It's my goal, right? And then I had never played slots before. You played slots?

And Valkyrie and Abe were like, we'll teach you how to play slots. There's no teaching how to play slots. No, no, no, no. Let him cook. Let him cook. Let him cook. So apparently, so you're wrong. Foolish. He doesn't know. There's a button, first of all.

No one is fucking pulling the lever. It's not 1935. Okay? There's a button and there's a lot of colors and there's a lot of cool graphics. Now, there is a vibe to it it like you need to you need to know which slot bang he's a profit of vibe so he would know yeah which apparently i am i'm really bad at gambling i lose all the time like i will literally fucking melt on the blackjack table like i play the book doesn't matter i'm always like i'm the dealer will show like a two and then hit a 21 with like eight cards.

Like, I don't know how the fuck it happens, but it always happens to me. Um, so I lost a bunch of money on blackjack, whatever. I go to the slots. I'm like,

let's do it. So Valkyrie sits down at one of the slot machines. It says, this is the one because there's a big goldfish on it. Like it's about to explode. And when it explodes, you hit like the jackpot or whatever right and then i and then i'm like okay what are you fucking what are you whinging at me for i thought i was telling a story about the magic of gambling you're being an asshole because you lost your six thousand dollars so i i sat down

i had my i don't know where my wallet is but i'll show you guys in a second i have my i have my special card that i will show you in a brief moment that gave me all the luck that i needed you will appreciate this um so i sat down next to her and she's like that's not the right machine like this is the right machine i'm like who cares like whatever i'm fucking learning how to gamble on a slot machine boom i start playing i hit the jackpot on the first one i guess like not that much it was like 600 it was like one of the minor jackpots but first button you hit a jackpot no i just like i juiced it a little bit i juiced it a little bit i pulled out my card boom i hit it like 600 okay clean then she got cleaned out on the machine with the big goldfish that had not exploded yet

i'm like you're not doing it right. Because now I'm like, feeling it. I'm like, you're not doing it right. Get up. The patriarchy at its finest. Yeah, get up. I'm so sorry, sir. How do I clean the dishes? I sit down.

I sit down. I smack it a couple times. Pull the fucking secret sauce. I got to show you guys the card. Hold on. Secret sauce. Hold on a second. You'll understand.

I keep hearing smack it down and secret sauce. Yeah. They mean different things to me. If I was in Vegas and I was down, like playing blackjack, and someone told this story about winning slots and other strategy, I would kill myself. No. Because slots are like, I do have something.

Yeah. The special card. Let me see. Sheesh. Wow. Flip it. Get it see. Sheesh. Wow. Flip it. Get it twisted. Don't get it twisted. Where did you get this?

Someone gave it to me at TwitchCon. I carry it in my wallet everywhere I go. Show it to the camera, please. You will do all of that. Please start gambling. It's a Trainwrecks card that has two sides. Speaking of, he announced his platform today. Did you guys see that?

Congratulations. I did not know that. We need to talk about it. I will be getting it twisted, which I did. I literally put the card down. Here's what I do. So I'm Turkish. I have a lot of rituals.

I believe in a lot of bullshit. Yeah, I'm very superstitious. I took the get it twisted card down. I put it on the play button. I smack it. Oh my God. $1,500. Wow.

Cashed out. Wait, that's amazing. Yeah. I've never seen that on slots. Yeah, no. Apparently, everybody wins it big on slots. I'm literally doing XQC and train wrecks right now. Yeah.

But for free instead of like a fat $30 million contract. It's very good. Definitely gamble. Everybody wins it definitely gamble on slots what you said oh man i will say i am probably the the most pure train watcher here i have watched so many it's fucking crazy anubis fucked him so bad and i i just want to i just want to put that out there because like something when you're a real fucking gambler, and obviously I've never gambled near the amount he has, but there's something just about watching the ride and you're like, yeah, I've been where he has at. You know what I mean?

You think you're the same. It's like parasocial gambling. It's actually crazy. And I can see it all happen. You are one of the frogs. I am one of the frogs. You're also a degenerate gambler, aren't you? Yeah, you're a degenerate gambler.

Yeah. But I'm just saying you don't really know until you know. Well, you're kind of glamorizing it right now. Yeah, you see. You're making it sound fun. You're kind of talking about like it's wistful and cool. It's more like you have to cope with the idea that you're in a club of misery to be able to not think about the bad times.

That's what I'm doing. Like League of Legends. In order to double down on the fun when you's what i'm doing like league of legends in order to double in order to double down on the fun when you're playing blackjack always if you double down ask for a face down card oh yeah oh yeah it's so much fun it's easy yeah yeah because if they also don't tease it sometimes yeah oh i i hate when the dealer slow rolls their card because it's like if it's like an 11 you know they need a 10 to hit 21 and destroy you and they're like you're like baccarat stop it no it's too confusing i don't know what's going on

it's just i'm also confused it's just like weird you're no it's not you sit there and it's like oh it's the flugel dorp like if it gets to the flugel dorp or the yeah if it gets to the methuselah then you win and it's like everyone's like screaming i I'm like, what the fuck's going on? The cool thing about background is you can tear the cards. If you're high limit, if you're playing for big money and you don't like your card, you can just rip it up. That is so base. It's actually, it's awesome. It's so weird.

It's so awesome. I don't understand it. That's just the rule of it. Yeah, for that reason, you play high limit for that reason alone? Yeah. Yeah, it's really fun. I played high limit. I played two rounds next to tony at the

high limit table blackjack immediately lost a thousand dollars on two five hundred dollar hands i was like i'm never doing that again that's done and then i won a bunch of money on slots okay so i ended up i i counted all the money by the end of it i literally made back, like lost and made back $3,000. Wow. Plus the amount of money that I had spent to just withdraw the money. It was almost perfect. And then I also found $100 at the airport parking lot. That is actually crazy because no one, that doesn't happen to real people.

The rich get richer. Yeah. No, it was an insane experience. Wealth inequality in America is out of control. Are you of control does it say the united states of movies or something i see this level of inequality it chokes me up i i like i got in the in the range of of the withdrawal amount like literally you don't believe me so there's something well there's something called a marker you know about this what is that that? It's a casino marker. It's basically like a no-interest loan that the casino can give you.

And if you're like a big deal or you have a lot of money, you can apply for it. Like a credit line, right? It's a credit line, yeah. But I only found out about this because Ludwig put me onto it when we were in Vegas doing the Smash Tournament. Oh, no. And I was a bad luck, dude. But you were walking around asking for a $20,000 marker, as I recall. Yeah.

But I was too late. If you have the money, it's a more expedient process to pull out. Instead of going to the cashier, and the cashier also charges you an insane percentage. If you're withdrawing $10,000, they take $200. Yeah, or the alternative is going to the bank and walking around with cash. I went to the bank last time I went there. Yeah and then you got to like have a briefcase like handcuffed your yeah which is why which is why what most degenerate gamblers or people with who have hosts and shit will do is just get a line of credit and then you just pay it at the end of it and if you

don't immediately kill you which is kind of cool yeah or when you're xqc and you forget to pay it uh for and then and then pay it and then your host and then my host is texting me like, bro, what the fuck's going on? Oh my gosh, that's miserable. A month in advance.

I was talking to him at Juiced. He was saying he had like a hundred grand in parlay bets on League of Legends matches that he doesn't watch. Yeah, yeah. It was the hardest thing I've ever...

My dad was a sports gambler. A lot of times you don't sweat the games, especially if it's a parlay because it's like nine games. What the fuck are you going to do? Yeah, it's just like he's got all these... My dad was a sports gambler. A lot of times you don't sweat the games, especially if it's a parlay, because it's like nine games. What the fuck are you going to do? Yeah, it's just like he's got all these... I don't even know how to bet on League of Legends games.

I actually tried one time. Neither do most of the people that are doing... I feel like he doesn't know how to do it. You just text a guy, and then a guy does 19 bets. I text a guy. I couldn't text a guy. Well, the first time I went down to Vegas

for League of Legends, I was in a tram, and I saw the coach of CLG, and I said, this is one wild turtle this no no immortals immortals sorry this is one immortals was like huge it was their year and we're in the tram and i see the coach of immortals and i'm like oh my god i'm such a fan of wild turtle that's what i said to him i was like so like kind of fangirling over the idea that he's associated with wild turtle and he goes oh wild turtle has a girlfriend that's way hotter than you and i went

what the oh my god that's crazy that was insane yeah And I went, what the fuck? Oh, my God. I was like, what the fuck? That's crazy. That's insane. Yeah, and then I was like, all right, well, I'm a fan of TSM anyway. That was the first thing you told me. And you were like, well, do I still have a shot? Like, what's up? Okay.

That is unreal. That was my experience with trying to bet on League of Legends. Because the reason I was in that tram is we were going over to Luxor because we thought Luxor might have sports books. Maybe he was saving you from losing money by being a total asshole. I was like, oh. You saw the future.

I was vindicated later when there was one of those riot after parties. It wasn't just open to the public. And we're there, and it's at this arcade bar. And he walks in and has no friends. And I was like, maybe if you were nice to me on the tram. This was before I ever streamed or anything.

But I was like, he did that thing in the lunchroom. I like when real life turns out like a movie. He's got shit in his pants. He literally shits himself right there. He's got headgear now for some reason. You're like, oh. Bro, in a fucking eSports tournament after party, you got no friends? That's like depths of hell. That's crazy like you couldn't make friends in the

the biggest goober squad like that's insane yeah you really just have to go up and be like hey I like you know super Mario yeah you're like hey you play Katarina like the person the person that you're gonna talk to has the same level of neurodivergence as you at an event like that like there's no shot

the bar is low yeah that was the first time i ever i gave well second time in my whole life i gave someone my number wow did they did they hear you back you're getting wow damn when was this he's hot he's a good looking guy no she i she's the lore is crazy the lore is insane you gave him your number did he did he hear you back no he didn't hear me back. It was crazy because this is why I actually had a boyfriend at the time. Whoa! Whoa!

Whoa! No, no, no, no, no, no. Listen. That's fucked up. No, I went to the games with a sign that was like, my boyfriend's in Plat, but the love of my life is in Masters. No! That's so much worse!

My boyfriend was a bit of a cuck in the way that Okay. What are you talking about? Stop it. We're laughing about it. You aren't making it any better. You're making the point that we're laughing about it. You guys don't understand. You're laughing, but he's a cuck.

No, not actually. It was more of like a gamba to see if like, because, okay. To see if like, cause okay. To see if Bergson would fuck you? No! While I was dating you. No, cause I would never, I would never go that far.

Of course. Okay. It was never, okay. I'll let you finish, but I gotta say, I don't, I don't forecast this. No, it's good. It's good. It's good ending. No, you misread this. Oh yeah. So it good it's good no you misread this oh yeah so it was like okay

it makes it worse because we know this person i'm bold i'm bold with this guy he's in my book club yeah that's a bond um what with a man but anyway so you know everyone has a hall pass right and usually your hall pass is unobtainable and my hall pass back then was very unobtainable as bjergsen sure and uh and we were that's why that's why i'm always crazy that's why i'm like whenever people say like oh like if you pick like a twitch streamer as your hall pass like what you're just trying to cheat on your person. This is just a nerd. He was like a celebrity to me. Yeah, but he plays league 14 hours a day.

It's not crazy. It's not like... I get what you're saying. It's not Leonardo DiCaprio. So I'm with my boyfriend, whatever, and he's my hall pass, and he was like, give him your number, and let's see if he'll text you back.

And I was like, okay. So he was like egging me on i would never yeah he was like can't wait to watch no and so then i i like gave him my number what did he think like transit department like he he fucks you and then he gets better at him i would never fuck him that'd be weird i think that is a sign of a healthy relationship it was just a fun little game yeah he was very calm well he was confident bjorks wanted to text me back so what how did this work like you just walked up to him and you were like hey well no there was a tsm meet and greet you gave him your number at a meeting greet so you waited a while yeah guys i'm cringe is this new oh my god are we surprised yes so you had like 30 seconds of facetime with him and you were like no i i know i had it pre-written because i was with my

boyfriend in line for like an hour you know he was there too yes i'm great i think this is someone who's been on the receiving end of this experience that she's describing, it would never work in a million years. Well, I know. Okay, everybody. It was great. What did he do? He looked at it and go, uh. So that's your boyfriend?

Is that your boyfriend right there? No, I don't remember what i did exactly but it was double lifting bjergsen and i was like can i i was like can i get in between you two for the picture you're my favorite because they were my favorite whatever and so i get in between them and i have the paper and i go and this is for you and i give it to him and he didn't even look at it he's like thanks and he like put in his pocket and then i was like surely we're gonna get married wow surely that's where this goes. Was he dating someone at the time?

Do we know? I don't think so. I mean, most people kept their relationships private. Yeah. I actually do think he was, but I don't know. Have you interacted with Bjergsen since then? Yeah. Because you were on TSM.

He's in the book club. He's in my book club. Can he read? He plays League of Legends. No, it was a very weird first interaction. Just because it was like meeting a celebrity to me. And it took me a while to realize that he's a human and not this platform person.

Yeah, everyone kind of goes through that, I think. Or most of the time, especially with Twitch gamers because they're more accessible. And this happens every time someone DMs me something stupid and I think, or most of the time, especially with Twitch gamers, cause they're more accessible. Yeah. And, uh, I, this happens every time, uh, someone DMs me something stupid and I say,

please never talk to me again. They go, Oh, holy shit. Oops. And I'm not even like a big deal, but they, it's like that reality check I think is important for a lot of people.

Yeah. I had it with mango. I like that. I like that. Everyone else usually is like super kind to people to be like, I'm a real human being. You're the exact opposite you're like no fucking kill yourself no no i i i hold the back on that one usually

oh my god but uh yeah let it rip on a child that's messaged you hey i'm a big fan no i have not done that that's what i'm asking you i'm asking you no i haven't usually i thought you said you have uh it's like a college freshman Ludd bud. You know what I mean? He's got the mogul. He's got the mogul merch on. He's like, oh my God, I'm going to send my favorite. People will message me and they'll be like, yo, do you have any recommendations for like,

I don't know, some sort of computer part? And I'm like, bro, I'm not fucking Google. Because I talk about how I like computers on the podcast. Dude, he's trying to be your boy. Yeah, but I think it's important for me to be like, hey. I am so asking you for computer part recommendations. We're friends. I also posted you last time.

I feel bad about that. That's true. I get anxious about playing video games with people. Why? I tilt really bad. It's scheduled. It's a planned group activity. Cutie knows it.

What about planned group activities? With me, it's not scheduled. It's literally last second. It's more like you were like, do you want to play Valorant sometime? And I was like... Because then it's like... it's literally last second it's more like you were like do you want to play valorant sometime and i was like because then it's like i forgot about it so don't worry that's fucking great same some vibes same shit but what i'm saying is it's more about like explaining to someone that i guess in a long form way i'm trying to tell them to seek out true and real friendships to enrich their lives and not people

that they see on the internet because I think that's dumb. Maybe you'll be in their book club someday. I also think that's dumb because I have not low self-esteem, but I don't think I've made it to a point where I deserve to be someone's Bjergsen. Bjergsen's a world-class gamer. I fart.

You fart well. You fart very well. You're the Bjergsen of farts, dude. People have been saying that. You're fucking fart coaching people. You're in in-lane farting? It's not far. Well, you're the person of farts. You're fucking fart coaching people. Yeah. No, we'll keep gassing you up,

dude. I think it is like a surreal experience. Like, like even double. If now I consider a friend and he sent me a very nice message for Thanksgiving. You were super league pilled, huh? I was a league pilled.

Yeah, no, that tracks. That tracks tracks you fucking weirdo i'm a cutie pie is why i have cutie in my name really i was the i that is one person like okay bjergsen and doublelift were hard to be normal around and now i can now i genuinely like spending time with them i consider them friends but i'm a cutie pie i don't think i could ever have a conversation with him. You freeze up? It's too much. Yeah, it's too much.

What? The most unwashed gamer league nerd. What the fuck? Yeah. You are so weird, dude. Oh my God. The Mormon church

fucked you up. You think? Yeah, holy shit. That's great. But you also skew extremely normie because you have a Taylor Swift addiction.

Yeah, you are. Yeah. Yeah, she does. It's like the most acceptable stand-up that you can be in. Gollum Spiegel kind of thing. I bought a box for Taylor Swift's concert. What does that mean?

Are you going to kill her? That's some slime shit. What the fuck? No, I instead of... With a glock in it. I've been saving up... I'm going to put her in this box forever and ever. And we'll be together.

Together, together, together. Taylor in the sky. And the trigger phrase is trouble. No, instead of, I've been saving up for a car. And instead of buying a car, I bought a box at her concert. Oh, a box scene. Oh, a box, like, oh. Yeah.

Oh. So how much was that? $50,000. No way. God. Bro, you're like that was that 50,000 no way Bro, you're like that that chick on Somebody make content out of that I'll make a vlog and it'll be cool You are like the anti-mobile like that is the least mogul move thing i've ever heard did for worlds yeah ludwig has never lost like more than 10 grand without making a youtube video about it i think

yeah he's pretty good at turning it around a little bit he's like oh here's where i got scammed out of 50 grand here's how i got scammed out of 200 grand two vlogs you could you could do one half of the vlog and then the other yeah two vlogs yeah the problem is that i don't think you are properly expensing these things and that's so dumb well no it is on it's from the business account because i'm in but here's the making a vlog so this is actually a trump deal you would you would think i'm sorry i'm gonna get political here you would think trump Trump would not do this But in 2018 it was the

Fucking Fair Tax Cuts Act or some shit Basically entertainments and meals expenses Are no longer able to be deducted as business expenses That's unfortunate So yeah You can't do it no matter what Even if you use company money Which is ironic because

He's finally gone too far No his own Donald Trump His own like The tax thing that's happening right now with the trump organization is literally almost related to that too like part of it is yes because like uh his his employee was like being compensated off the books basically including uh meals and and uh things that are deductible but i don't want to

know what it is um his employee was uh his employee i think was like being compensated with like meals and things that are deductible. His employee I think was being compensated with furniture and shit like that. Not money? So that it was not taxable. Oh, that's so interesting. I think they got him into a school. So I paid my editors, dude.

Here's a couch. Okay, well you're going to jail. Tax cuts and child tax. Ship them chairs. That's so interesting. Yeah, so even if you could sort of game it, like it's the IRS says, no, sorry, family. Well, guys, I'm making a really cool vlog out of it.

It's $50,000. I'm pretty sure they'll see that. I don't need a car. Yes, sir. That is a flag on that transaction. Yeah, I feel great about it. When is it? Next August.

Oh, my God. That's so funny. You bought it ahead of time. Oh, my God. That's so far. You bought it ahead of time. You have to. So, do you get to, like, meet her? No. Okay. That'd be weird.

You spent 50 grand and you didn't get to fucking meet Taylor Swift? No. What? Why are you guys surprised? Ludwig spent, what, like, 60 grand on Worlds? Yeah, he did. We couldn't even watch the game. Couldn't even watch the game in those seats.

Wait, he spent 60 grand on Worlds? About, yeah. That's crazy. He makes too those seats. Wait, he spent 60 grand on Worlds? About, yeah. That's crazy. He makes too much money. Yeah, let's divert my problems. Yeah, what the fuck? He's weird. Bro, if I did some shit like that, I would get blasted.

Do you think you've painted yourself into a corner where you just can't spend like a crazy animal? I mean, I just don't give a shit. I still buy stuff all the time power through but you'll you'll get you'll get shit for it while like when ludwig does it it's le mogul moon yeah yeah it's kind of no matter what happens like uh even though it's not outside of my world view to make like lavish extravagant payments for things that you enjoy because i don't give a shit you know what i mean i'm like everyone should be able to do this um uh people still are like they'll use it they'll weaponize everything I do though yeah it's more so just again not to use this word today but vibes it's literally just no it is it is it's like the chair

the charitability of like even a political commentator uh and like how their behavior will be uh received is is oftentimes just pure aesthetics pure branding like there was a time when i don't know why this happens like but there were a lot of people who were like on left twitter worst people on the planet obviously um but they're like major markiplier fans apparently and because i grew out my hair they kept comparing me to markiplier and saying markiplier is like uh you know if hasan was a nice person like what and i would be like well like why are you guys saying this he makes like gorillions of dollars like what the fuck you're mad at me you hate me because i make too much money and you think he's a better leftist because he but he makes more money than i do. Wait, this is, I'm sorry.

I am really bad at like big YouTubers. He is the five nights of Freddie guy, right? Yeah. There's a lot of, I've never, I haven't like really watched any of his content ever, but I think he's like, like after all this was happening,

I like watched it to see what the fuck was about. He's like a handsome and he has like a very nice voice and he plays video games, but he's not like a nerd he's like kind of like this i play video games and i have this voice so that was huge i mean if you yeah that's if you did it like a noted combo if you did it like 15 years ago and you did it for 15 fucking years yeah you're like at the top you're the guy he's that guy but now we got the atriox of the world trying to scrape the sludge off the bottom of the pack by making college kids think that they're smart.

Some of them are smart. I made atriox. Okay, every time you shit on me like that, I feel like I'm being attacked as well. You're directly- You actually do the same thing. Yeah, you are attacking what I do, my bread and butter. But he just does it in a capitalist slant, and you do it in a socialist slant. Yeah.

Wow. I don't do it. Me and you, Cutie, were the only true content creators. Why? You and Cutie Cinderella are Yeah. Wow. I don't do it. Me and you, Cutie, were the only true content creators. Why? You and Cutie Cinderella are the only two. I've been saying that.

We are the same in our content, you and I. You both try to fuck Bjergsen. Yes, sir. Well, I didn't try to fuck him. I'd like to keep our relationship normal without saying these things.

Tuning into Cutie's stream at like 1 a.m. and you're playing League of Legends with your mod. It's must-see TV mod and you are just fucking angry you are like passive aggressive to your mod and angry to your teammates and you're just pissed off

everyone in chat is like low vibes you're mad and I'm like this is that's actually pure switch she's turned around her feet are against the wall and she's just singing into the wall. Waiting for the cue to pop.

We sing the climb. What's your rank? Tell them. Tell them what your rank has been for three years that I've known you. You've been grinding year after year. Tell them how exactly it works. What's your rank?

Kill myself. I have played for eight years and I haven't gotten out of silver. Oh, no. That's bad, right? The same. I don't play league. For all the years I've known. It's not that it's bad.

It's that if you keep playing, you should move. It's 80. It's not that silver's bad. It's that she plays for hours and hours and hours. I just need to switch roles. I just need to switch roles. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, she's right.

You just need a new keyboard. You need a new mouse And a new keyboard And you'll be Becoming better gamers At least you can stop Getting bad teammates For eight years consistently

Bad support Bad support I started Valorant Like a couple months ago I've I've been I've been silver one One time

And then I deranked But I'm also in like The worst space possible With like He gets it But you're also new to the worst space possible with like, uh, he gets it. I have new to the game, but I also have no, like my friends,

I have no, I have no friends that are like in my situation. So I'm, I'm victim to, no, I have plenty of people to play with, but I'm falling victim to having constantly. Every time we do a five stack,

be on the Smurf queue. Oh, me too. When it's like, that's my problem. The other team's hella good. Yeah, there'll be like a- Your little baby bear Hassan and everyone's, you're Kazooie and everyone's Banjo.

Well, I suck ass at Valorant. Oh yeah? Yeah. What are you at? I'm bronze. I haven't played in forever. Oh, nice. That's why I started streaming it solo

because I wanted to be as good as my friends to get to their rank so we could play together. What do you know? Plat 1. I hit plat, which is cool. Okay, that's good. Then you are like, isn't this the stance too, right? Stance?

Yeah, something like plat. But it's like not about the rank. It's more of like I understand your struggle because when you're the little brother of the group and everyone's really good and you're like, fuck, well, you know, you feel like you're being carried by them and stuff. I never feel like I'm being carried. but it's inconsistent, but even that's inconsistent because like, there are games

where I fucking pop off. Like, we'll play against like a full gold lobby, okay? You're such an honest rager. So we've changed kill yourself

to keep yourself safe. Is that what you say? That's why I always say that in chat. That's really, that's nice to say my chat knows everyone knows the other guy knows your teammate yeah i say kiss myself that's what that's my that's my way of getting around that but like look what i'm saying is if i solo q you know i'm getting two dcs because it's like solo elo that there's like 12 year olds on there

and they're like give me your gun i want your gun skin and i'm like you're fucking bottom fragging kid you're bottom fragging that happens in plat as well don't worry it doesn't get better yeah people beg for skins in plat i hate it i'm like just play why who cares that's what i'm saying who cares what the fuck i mean i bought all the skins don't get me wrong but like i'm still'm still mad. I'm like, I've never. Oh, God. I know. Anyway. I know.

It tilts me so much, especially if the dude is bottom fracking. I'm like, that's for winners. Okay. You get a fucking 2K, 3K round. Then I'll think about giving you my skin. Get the ace. Yeah. He's like, bro, on God, bro.

I swear. If you give me the fucking. If you give me your, you know, your vandal with the skin, like, I'll fucking ace. I'm like, no, you won't. You've died 11 times. You have zero kills. I have a question for all you guys. What if tomorrow the U.S. government and all the world government got together?

Shut up, Marsh. He's snickering. They got together and they said live streaming is banned and you can never do it ever again what do you do but i still do youtube uh no not you youtube's also banned oh they say they say all current content creators if you content create one more time you will be thrown into a giant uh machine. Okay, I'll go to the giant meat machine, baby. You will? One last big huzzah.

Sick-ass content, dude. Dicks out. You know what I mean? Fuck it. I'm having sex on camera, and then I'm dying. Okay, I like that. That's right. You go back to NVIDIA.

They take you back. They'll take me back. The cuties ex-boyfriend of companies. Speak to that. Because you're cucking them. It's not like he went to fucking... He didn't go to AMD. I didn't go fuck their rival.

I never fucked anyone. I would like to make that very clear. He was tied up and he was going like... He's in my book club. Stop making this weird. You're an unsuccessful. You were unsuccessful in cuckolding your boyfriend. But that doesn't change that you tried.

It's a shot on goal. She's silver one at cucking. Eight years. I've been cucking for eight years. I can't get out of this elo. I have shit teammates. You're a shit teammate. I hope he never sees this. Don't worry.

What I'm saying is if I had a company and someone left to become a content creator, you think I'm letting them back? Fuck no. Baby. Imagine I go back to my old boss's sweet 43-year-old man and he goes, fuck no.

That would be so funny. Bitch. No, i don't think so we left on good terms so really yeah we were chill okay dude i was i was i was working in streaming for two years it wasn't like it was like i came out of nowhere maura should you ask because i you're the only person i can't see okay no he didn't ask cutie what would you do? I'd find myself a sweet, supple 88-year-old. No, I wouldn't. I wouldn't do that.

Nice. 92 for sure. Yeah. Make sure they have the wealth. You don't want another 10 years of dealing with that. No, I'd be fine. I would walk dogs for a living, live the dream, finally. That's what the money is.

Yeah. Walking pooches? Yeah. No, I would go pro in league of legends streaming out of the way streaming out of the way that's right that was the real that was holding you back it has been it has been when you're offline did you ever have a normal like human job i did what did you what did you do i worked at a private club it was it's like a country club for rich people but it's like in a city and it's this whole

ecosystem of like rich people that like fucking gather up and join clubs together and like they didn't do butt stuff they would like have like events and it's just this really weird like what do you call it market economy place thing but i was a uh i was a communications coordinator nice yeah i was like it was like a shot in the dark job, and I moved to LA because I tried to come here to write for TV. What's the club? You don't want to give it away? Can you edit it out?

That's how you know it isn't good. He only goes to the coolest clubs. They got pictures of like Reagan and shit. Oh, yeah. It was so cringe, but my boss was cool. She was fine. That's what I did. I did biz dev, which is the worst.

I like sales. I did everything. I did biz dev, which is the worst. I like sales. I did everything. I did literally everything for the Young Turks. I built our entire advertisement operations. I had to build it from the bottom up because we had no direct sales team. Worse. Worse than that. I think sales is worse than marketing.

I did sales for a while. Yeah. It's so awful because you have have to, you have to like talk to account managers on the other side and wine and dine them like you like them. Yeah, yeah.

I hate that. That's a full-time job. I hate having to like, you know, act like I like this person. You were Pete Campbell with hair. Yeah, I just,

it was so bad. I would do that but I'd get like Stockholm Syndrome. I'd be like, this is my friend now. You actually would? Yeah.

I'm like, this is exciting. They like me. They're like, hey, we're gonna go with. You actually? They're like, this is exciting. They like me. They're like, hey, we're going to go with a different agency. You're like, bestie, know what happened. What? I thought we were close. Yeah. Maybe I'd go back to

retail. I loved retail. I loved it. I'm easy to be sucked into cults. Mormonism. Old Navy. The Yard. Pretty similar. easy to be sucked into cults yeah yeah mormonism i'm surprised you've never done like an mlm the yard like yeah pretty pretty similar yeah like there is a i forget where this i remember in the statistic about like uh the likelihood dramatically increases if you're like from a more insular cult like a jehovah's witness or whatever if you're like an ex-mormon or or ex-scientologist like

you are way more susceptible to multi-level marketing schemes oh really you know if maybe because you just have the biggest heart yeah that's what it is you just want to believe i'm just stupid i'm pretty dumb everybody surprised like i mean you you got cult robbed by him when he said get amazon stock yeah but at least you didn't do like fdx i thought you were smart. On behalf of no one, right? It's only like he didn't get anything from giving you bad advice besides a fun story. I just like enjoy my friends losing money.

I mean, every once in a while, I just send him the screenshot of the negatives. You send it. It hurts you a little bit. It's annoying. I said, by the way, you're also bad at League of Legends. It does bother me. Couldn't even carry me out of bronze this one.

I'm happy that you're bronze on Valorant. Was that a lie or is that for real? No, I haven't played Valorant since beta. I just played it when it came out. Nice. You ever told anybody your interview? Which one? With Riot.

Oh, with Riot? Yes. And how you went for the gambit i uh i was like wait save it for the paywall part of this episode because because we've actually reached an hour this was a wonderful conversation and things are about to get way spicier behind the paywall if you go to patreon.com slash fear and don't forget to like and subscribe on the current youtube channel and tell us in the comments what we should change the name to yeah never change which we will not be guys

i want you to just in the comments i want you to say your favorite thing about brandon h rock ewing yeah you should do that okay because he took a lot of shit today yeah and we're gonna get i feel like i was really nasty and we're gonna get naked with it it's gonna be so weird where can people find you guys he has three nipples by the way the third one

is fucked up it's long it's long like a muppet's nose it's not where you think it would be what the fuck it's not where you

wait really can I see on the on the patreon episode yeah you can find me at the yard that's the podcast

I do with Ludwig and Nick and Aiden who are we're all friends and you'll be our friend too if you watch that's the fun part you be our friend too if you watch. That's the fun part. You're our friend now when you watch the

podcast. Definitely not selling parasocial relationships. You can find me at Atrioc. If you think you're dumb and you watch any of my marketing money videos, you'll be smart and your friends will think you're smart and you're guaranteed smart. You can just walk around knowing that you're smarter.

You know what? Sometimes he's fucking phony. Yeah, he's fucking phony. You can find me after Ludwig raids me. No. You're the host. I'm not a host yet. It's not official? I refuse.

I thought you made a tweet saying, I'm taking my time. That guy made the tweet. No, he did. He does it a lot. Anyway. That's why we're here. Yeah.

He tweets stuff. He tweets and drinks. You know, make sure you check out. I have a Christmas concert on Friday that Slime is singing at. Hasan is making his debut on Broadway. No singing from him, but he is Scrooge in A Christmas Carol. Really? Yeah. You're an actor. He's an actor. No one

else could be my Scrooge. I couldn't. You're a thespian. I don't know what I'm going to do. I've literally never even seen the Christmas thing that you're referencing. It's okay. You're going to do awesome. It's going to be good. You're going to do A Christmas Carol? This Friday. I'm Muslim, bro. What's the Muslim version? There is none. It sucks. Friday. I'm Muslim, bro. What's the Muslim version?

There is none. It sucks. No, Islam is like, unfortunately, it's on the one hand, it's like the most giving religion. It's like the most, it's the closest to like a socialist organization. Okay. But it is also like the most mid when it comes to holidays and shit. They don't have stories. They don't know. It just sucks.

You guys don't got like. We have like a form of that, but it's not even It just sucks. You guys don't got Muppets. You guys don't got like We have like a form of that but it's not even like Islam specific. You guys don't got Toyotathon. The only thing we have is Ramadan

which is fucking an entire month of fasting bro. That's tight though. Like no it's not. You're fasting from sun up to sun down like the entire fucking month.

It's so bad. You don't actually fast for a month. Yeah. That's just me in the cheer squad. Sun up to sun down. You can't fucking even drink a month. Yeah. That's just me and the cheer squad. You can't fucking even drink water.

That's fine. Sun up and sun down. For an entire fucking month. A religion about fitness? Yeah. I'm about that. It's not even a jacked religion. Yeah. My body's been people.

Yeah, we should do that, like, you know, the liver only month. You know what I mean? It's just carnivore diet month. It hurts now. Yeah. Sebum retention. Yeah. Sebum retention. Yeah. That's always.

Anyway, check out the Patreon. We'll see you guys later. Peace. Train does that a lot. He decides one thing and then it's just like, yeah,

like he said about stream rewards. He's like, this thing ran by millionaires and I was like, bitch, I'm broke. I just spent 50,000 on. Also, like,

wouldn't you make more money than all of the other streamers? Like, what? It's just so strange. He said he could buy me and Pokimane out. And Ludwig. And Ludwig, too. Buy and sell.