Fear& - Hasan, Will & QTCinderella Have Become Prisoners On Their Own Podcast | Fear&AustinShow

Episode Date: March 20, 2023

Austin flew in for this and is now running the show, this is now his podcast, there were no negotiations. He is the 100% sole owner of the podcast but has agreed to pay me a very generous salary so i'm not complaining. Complete rename and rebrand incoming, dont be worried though the podcast will be still be pretty much the same with only a few changes. He is not making me write this. Okay goodbye now enjoy love you.🎉BONUS CONTENT🍾 🌟PATREON - https://www.patreon.com/FearAnd🎧 AUDIO PLATFORMS - https://linktr.ee/fearand✰ follow Fear&! ✰Hasan: https://twitter.com/HasanthehunQT: https://twitter.com/QTCinderellaWill: https://twitter.com/TheWillNeffAustin: https://twitter.com/AustinontwitterMarche: https://twitter.com/MarcheFear&: https://twitter.com/FearAndPod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Please gamble responsibly. Gambling problem? For free assistance, call the Connex Ontario helpline at 1-866-531-2600. Bet MGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. i don't know psm's office maybe that'd be weird i'm losing it i'm losing my mind i'm losing my mind. I'm losing my mind. Austin landed in Los Angeles, California from Austin, Texas, approximately like two and a half hours ago. I'm not entirely certain. He was very adamant about having this podcast be done at five.

He was like, I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. Judy Cinderella has walked in here before austin yes no we've been we've been going i wait what as soon as cutie walked in i was like i have to we have to get started wait i have so many thoughts this is ridiculous 45 seconds okay look i'm so upset i cannot believe you just walked in. I'm so upset. I fucking flew on a jet, okay, from Austin, Texas with incredibly intense headwinds, landed in Los Angeles during the fucking whatever marathon it is,

drove through LAX traffic, and then I had to shower and change and get ready. It's mind-boggling to me that you said you were going to be here at 5 p.m. because people were like, oh, I got to do it at 5, and I was like, well, I kind of have like a shelter stream that I'm doing, which we'll be talking about in a brief moment, and you were like, oh, yeah, it's not a big deal. I'll be there.

I'll be there. I'll be there at 5. Hold on. False, fake news. You said podcast at 6 p.m. So we pushed it back to 6 p.m. What time is it right now? 6.36. But we all know.

How are you in literally, like, I don't want to give coordinates on anything, but you are close in proximity. I feel like you are getting kicked off. You are close in proximity to where I'm at. I flew from Austin, Texas. I was sick all week. I was the starting quarterback for the championship team. We're going to be talking about that

in a little bit too. We're going to be talking about that too. No, this is not you fucking pumping up your laurels. This is homophobia at its finest. I am homophobic. Goddamn microphone right in my fucking face. It's a different mic.

It's a different mic and it's right in my face. Oh my God, Austin, that is a different microphone. It's right in my face. Variable here. Notice how Cutie is using the microphone that you were using last week, and yet it hasn't started assaulting her violently. It's because they're homophobic microphones.

Don't touch it. They lash out at gay people. And we're back. Fear and is back, and better than ever, bigger than ever, as many might think, actually, as a matter of fact. We have our wonderful co-hosts here. We got Will Neff, Austin Show, Cootie Cinderella. It's a slammed episode where all of the hosts are here.

That's right. Absolutely. Is this the first time that we've all been here at once? I think it is. Yeah. Oh, I mean last week. Well, we had like a guest last week. We had a guest last week.

This is all the first time that we're all here. This is one for the family. Look, I want to know what, I want to dive into your mind sometimes. I want to know what's going on dive into your mind sometimes i want to know what's going on in there like okay you want to dive in okay he told me on the phone he's like hasada's he called will because i'm texting him i'm like where the fuck are you nicer brother yeah i was like also where the fuck are you like what did i say he said no stress all yeah he's looking at me and smiling because he's like yeah no, no stress, Austin. Take your time.

That's what he said. To fuck with me. Yeah. Okay. Austin goes, I'm getting my shoes laced. Okay. I was getting my shoes. I was lacing my own shoes.

No. Someone else laughed in the background when you said you were getting your shoes laced. We don't talk about him. All right. Austin was getting his shoes laced. How bullsh- We're going to get drinks later, and that's it.

That's all this is. I don't even know where to begin. I feel like he's like a mad dad right now, and you're grounded. You were here. You were in Los Angeles at a time that was so viable for you to come. I know.

Like. I landed at 4. The flight was late. I tried to speed it up. You were so on time. You were slated to be so on time. And then you came after Cutie. And Cutie's always the latest.

I got in the shower when she was 30 minutes away. I don't know what happened. I had to take a shower. I didn't tell you because you would have been pissed. But I had to take a shower. Yes, I would have been. Because I'm going out for drinks after. I have, what am I? Take the fucking shower after.

That's a lot of work. I wanted to get into my outfit. Look at me. I look great. You do have a very nice jacket. What is the jacket? What's going on over here? This is a,

I don't know what, you know this brand. Here, check it out. Where is my jacket, you charlatan? From high school. It's a Letterman's jacket. Sandra. It's a Sandraman's jacket. Sandra.

It's a Sandra jacket. I got it at the mall. Not at H. Lorenzo. I'll tell you that. It's not H. Lorenzo. Not allowed back there. And I do have your jacket. You have my jacket?

Back at home in Oregon. You mean Will's? Yeah. You did not take it to fucking Oregon. I did, but it's back. I have it in my suitcase. I was just hoping nobody would ask for it. Please let Will wear it sometimes. Yeah, I will. It's back. I have it in my suitcase. I was just hoping nobody would ask for it. Please let Will wear it sometimes.

I will. That's insane. I do have a couple of guy friends that want to wear it. No, Austin! This is not... He's like renting it out. He's like renting it out for people making money on the side. He's got an expensive jacket.

There's a nice friend of mine. He's very good looking and a little twinkish. Okay, if you're going to get like, okay, okay, then it's fine. If you're going to get some pussy out of it, then fine. I'll allow it.

Okay, cool. I don't want to make this about how Hassan's upset at me. Let's move on. That's going to be very difficult. Let's move on. It's going to be very difficult not for me. Judy, I'm going to need your support.

I hate sitting on this side of the table. I'll say. I have to run outside really quick. I had food delivered because I haven't eaten all day, but I'm not going to eat it on the stream or on this because you guys hate when I chew. I'm not going to do it, but I am going to grab it because it's outside. Chew extra hard.

Fuck them. No, I won't. YOLO. Wayne. Okay. Well, Will, how about you? how wonderful of a week have you had because i thought you were not here yeah no i went to i went to get my flight i had a five hour delay and then they canceled the flight and then because it rained in los angeles

no they they had to equipment stuff. I don't know. But they rebooked me like three days later, essentially. And so I couldn't make any of the events down in Austin. But thankfully, the Diablo 4 beta did come out this weekend. Yeah. And your boy supped heartily. I found out Will wasn't in Texas when I landed in Texas.

I called you before. I knew it was going to happen. Oh, he's the number one guy to call. He called me for flight advice. And what did I tell you? You said you might want to rebook, but there's a chance it'll go out. Because it happened to me three days prior. Is there more to that story?

Yes. Go on. Sorry, it's Baby's first podcast. Listen, people, I was on your stream and I'm going to talk about it now. Yep. Talk about it publicly on the podcast. Thank God.

You're gay. I had a flight. Yeah, I'm openly gay. I had a flight. That's crazy. Okay, I had a flight from back home to Oregon. Okay, it gets canceled 20 minutes before we're about to board. I hope you got a full refund.

Oh, I got more than a full refund. He got his shoes tied. He fucked the pilot. I was pissed. TLDR, they blamed it on air traffic control. I did the research. It wasn't air traffic control. How do you do research on that?

I know people at dispatch. I called the- Wait, what? I called Delta Dis dispatch. I called the... I called the... Wait. I called Delta Dispatch. He's an actual problem. I knew about their... They knew about this delay. It was not what they said it was. And this is what's...

These airlines take advantage of people and it's bullshit. Yeah, I agree. Anyway, that's not the case. I stormed to the Delta Lounge, okay? And I was very polite, okay? I was with my friend Kirk and I asked for a separate hotel room okay because kirk and i love kirk but i didn't want a room with him right yeah also free

privacy you should get free stuff yeah exactly so i advocated for myself they wouldn't do it they said it's only you're on the same reservation it's outside of our policy so i was a little upset yeah so they told me to call the 1-800 number so So next thing you know, I'm in the lounge for two hours talking to 1-800. They can't help me. I go back. Meanwhile, there's this woman in the lounge that is blacked out drunk. I mean blacked out, belligerently drunk that they are giving water to. And I feel so bad for the staff because she was just out of it.

For some reason, while this woman is blacked out drunk, okay, blacked out drunk for some reason, while this woman is blacked out drunk, okay? Blacked out drunk for some reason, while I'm talking to the agent sitting at a desk like this, she decides that- How? Literally how? She decides that she wants to go home with me for some reason. Oh, that's nice.

What do you mean for some reason? You're a stud. Oh, thank you. But she- Did you have the jacket on? I had a different jacket on. I had my puffer, my Nike puffer on with my smiley sweatshirt.

Everybody's seen the outfit. Yeah, she thought you were a road man. That is the straightest fit you could wear, by the way. So she wraps her arms around me, randomly lunges at me, wraps her arms around me, and starts kissing my neck. Starts kissing my neck.

How big are we talking? She's a very small woman. Okay. I was not. Was there physical intimidation involved? I'm totally okay. I'm fine. It wasn't whatever.

I could have pressed charges. I didn't. She was pulled off of me by like five Delta agents, and she was like screaming, you're no fun. You're no fun. And she was like trying to like, you know. It was very unfun of you. So technically, you know, so technically by definition, I get assaulted.

You got sexually assaulted. In the lounge. Yeah. Right? And only then, only then did they decide to give me a second hotel room. Shut the fuck up. You used that to your advantage? No, I didn't.

They said, sir, I kid you not. I didn't use it to my advantage, but I continued the conversation. They're like, yes, it will not be a problem. Sir, we're so sorry. We'll get you the second hotel room. Hey, there you go. And so I got the second hotel room. But anyway, that was my little story.

That was my little spiel. I don't, I want to be very clear about this. I am okay. I'm fine. By definition, it was sexually assault. This is not a big deal to me. So please, in the comments. Okay, on the other side of this story,

if we're going to, if we're going to. You think they're going to hunt her down? He's not wrong. People will get mad at him and say he's trivializing sexual assault. Oh, really? Yeah, but I'm not. It happened to me.. Oh, really? Yeah. But I'm not. It happened to me.

I feel okay. I'm fine. I'm not. I don't mean to diminish anybody else's experience. We've been assaulted by the same dude on the same night.

And like when we talk about it and like it's, you know, as is like whatever. Yeah. As if it's whatever people have like gotten upset about that. But regardless.

Good to know. Regardless, one question i have was there a part of you and this is going to be inappropriate was there a part of you where you were like damn i'm a stud no not with the woman kissed me but the i told the delta agents that i was like it's not a big deal and And the day just started like, yeah, yeah, you know, you'd happen. You're used to that kind of attention. You loved it. I loved that.

Oh, God, you are so. But not the, not the, not the, not the, like, I wasn't, like, I wasn't loving her kissing me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, like, when the Delta agents are like, yeah, you're a handsome guy. You're, you're used to, not used to getting assaulted, but, like, used to getting, like, attention. Yeah, women from women. You were like, oh. I was like, I was like,

you keep behaving in the most hetero fashion. This is not a you're asking for it moment. You better stop doing that. Stop het baiting. She thought I was so straight.

She probably was like, oh, I love it. I should have, I should have, I think she was just zooted. I should have pulled down my Lululemon sweatpants and exposed a man thong and said,

no, no, no. This is not what you think. You would never wear a man thong. I wouldn't. You have a jockstrap thing, though. I have a couple. You do? I love jockstraps.

You love jockstraps? Wait, really? I don't know what it is. Oh, cutie, you're missing out. Jockst is like a like a male thong like a banana hammock oh wait is that the thing where your butt has no coverage yeah i don't understand that isn't the butt you're trying to cover i own a several wait why they were originally for sport they're to hold a cup oh so you put it over your underwear oh you wear it like a football pad you wear your cup and then you wear that and it holds your cup in place and then on top of that you put underwear on

you just don't put any underwear on no i don't usually wear them my friends wear them but you have you have it for your friends no like i have friends i i don't give them my underwear but i just own some because like i just have them but i don't wear them my underwear but I just own some because I just have them but I don't wear them very often you've worn them I've taken photos of them you've never seen them I have not posted these photos

I can't wait for Austin to start an OnlyFans I don't have any with me why do you want to see my it's like all cock you send me photos all the time with your dick imprint very visible Why do you want to see my... It's like all cock. That's all it is. I mean, it's... You send me photos all the time with your dick imprint very visible. I do have a couple that I got to send you. Yeah, that's what I mean.

Wait, wait. Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize the jockstrap was a bridge too far. I do have a couple of photos I got to send you. I'm a little offended that you didn't send me or Will any photos of you in a jockstrap. I thought it would have been crossing the line at the time. He got you off the mailing list after you ixnayed the tongue photo. Yeah.

Really? What was the tongue photo? What? Marge, can you pull up the tongue photo real quick? He got off the mailing list, dude. I was wrong, by the way. I'll fucking admit it. I thought it was like, I thought you were bottom signaling too much.

I thought so. But honestly, like, people people dug it they really liked it yeah because you are so rugged on main and it's a media reply i don't even know what freaking account is your main i'll be honest it's the one with more followers up there up there it is so he replied so you didn't like this photo he replied to me saying this do anything for you and i told him i told you not to me saying, this do anything for you? And I told him, I told you not to post one, but then Larray immediately said, it did something for me,

and I'm on. Completely. The fuck do I know? You know what I mean? Perspective. Yeah. I was so wrong. I think that's a great photo.

Do you think it does, like obviously no hetero. It does not. Like no hetero, let's pretend we don't know each other, pretend I'm straight. Would this photo do anything for you? What? If you were straight. Pretend I'm straight, pretend we don't know each other. Pretend I'm straight. Would this photo do anything for you? What?

If you were straight? Pretend I'm straight. Pretend we don't know each other. I can't just pretend. Pretend Ludwig's not in the picture. No, that's awful. No, no, no. Why? This is like.

What's wrong with that? That is not a straight photo. No, that's not a straight photo at all. That's why I was like. You would know from that photo. Yeah. Yes. Dog.

The reason why I told you. I've never seen a straight man do that with his tongue. The reason why I told you. I've never seen a straight man do that with his tongue. The reason why I told you not to post that is literally because I thought it looked too gay. Okay. Got it. Which is why. That's why you said bottom baiting. Sure.

Yeah. Which is why I thought like a big part of your charm is like, you know, you're the rugged guy. Right. Right. Wow. So you don't want him to be gay. No. That's.

No. I'm saying. I'm sorry. I'm trying to. I'm trying to max. I am trying to maximize his output for every bottom. Bottoms love. Bottoms love like a rugged macho.

It's like the Dixie Chicks management. They told them to never talk about politics. So then everyone will love you. No, he can be as gay as he wants. But just like in a very like mask macho. Exactly. No, he like he can be gay, but you're saying he can't define. He can't say who he's voting for.

I'm not even kidding. I don't even fuck who we vote for. I'm just trying. I was I was wrong anyway. I was wrong. I was wrong. Dixie Chicks. Can you help me here?

Listen, Dixie Chicks fell off after they talk politics. OK, yeah, that makes me right. I know that makes you right. I'm open for anything at this point um oh my my i'm gonna bottom this my thing was like oh we're not gonna bottom this year i'm gonna you're such a liar it takes so much prep to bottom he oh we know i'm going to absorb somebody's semen yes no he's a permatop

wait do not clip that Andy Piker please do you know if do you know if oh he knows who he's you are bait dude

oh my god get the fuck out of here don't throw me in the briar patch Andy Piker please don't clip this I have an actual real life question

he's a power top. He's a permatop. He's a selfish top. That's right. He will never bottom. He does not understand the plight of bottom. Enough weed or consume enough weed that it's infused in your semen. And then you come in someone's butt and it goes through their pores and they get high.

On to something here. No. Really? She is not. Really? Cutie, I think. Where did that come from?'t let them i'm just wondering did you have that like ready somewhere absorb he said i'm gonna absorb and i said someone

semen and then i thought to myself what if you infuse your semen with weed and then you were able to get high oh my god use the internet for fuck's sake we have invented a new thing yeah yes try it out okay i think we need to get back to this. Yeah. You were wondering. That was what I was wondering. No. You were also wondering like,

oh, how do we know about his bottom adventures? There's a thing called booty boot camp. Oh, yeah. Booty boot camp.

So, it starts off with like, it starts off with like, tiny dildos and you work your way up to like, It's like vaginismus. Yes. Well,

you work your way up to big cock well you work your way up to big cock vaginismus tell me what the is that christmas for the pussy no you know you said that last time we've talked about it no she had she has a she has gorilla grip coochie oh i didn't know the technical you have to yeah you have to train yourself with dildos yeah so that basically it's the same principle for Austin's asshole, and he bought the booty boot camp thinking he was going to bottom train, and then he put the first tiny one. It was like a class where you all go and get fucked.

Do squats? Oh. No, like train your asses together. No. Like Lamaze. I unfortunately failed after the first level. Couldn't even put the little thing in there. Okay, says you.

You probably, you can't even get a finger in yours. Oh, Gabe Piker? Yeah, I have. Gabe Piker. The only last time you had something in your ass is when you were getting hazed when you were joining your fraternity. I also take really big shit sometimes.

Okay. So it's like technically coming out. It's different going in than coming out. Yeah, but I have had my butt eaten. So I do have that. Had your butt eaten? sometimes okay so it's like technically coming out going in then coming out yeah but um i have i haven't had my butt eaten so i do have that eaten fuck yeah god that must have been oh you probably never talked to her again i see this is like a big part of the reason why i don't like doing any like butt stuff in general because i'm like very hairy and i'm like very insecure thinking about but no but no i i i literally shave i shave my butthole i shave like the insides of

my ass you shave your butthole do you have like squat i have a body shaver oh um with the yeah she uses he uses your code on manscaped qdc that's 20 off yeah i have a i have a philips norelco body shaver oh well not an ad not an ad but like you know people ask all the time but it seems like a hard angle to get. Luckily, I'm blessed without a hairy asshole, and I've thought about it before, because shaving a vagina is really hard. We don't talk about it enough.

What about shaving a dick? Dick's a... What do you mean? A dick is a rod. A vagina is like a never-ending book with like... Yeah, but what if you have... There's an art form to shaving a penis. Yeah.

Yeah, you just said it was hard. No, it's not easy. No, it's not easy, but a pussy... Well, a vagina is way harder. Yes. I would like to There's an art form to shaving a penis. Yeah. Yeah. It's not easy. You just said it was hard. No, it's not easy. No, it's not easy, but a pussy. Well, a vagina is way harder. Yes. I would like to see. I'm going to agree with her. You shaved both?

I've shaved both. You shaved a pussy? Tell us about it. What the fuck? Tell us about it. I am very good at shaving my dick, and I wanted to try my hand across the fence. You're like the exotic barber. No.

Vaginas are so hard. You have to fold exotic barber. No, vaginas are so hard. You have to like fold stuff open. No. Well, we have balls. So like we have like similar. A dick is much harder. You have to, you have to. Listen, I can do an instructional video.

You didn't do it from above though. There is a technique I called holding the bullfrog. Where you have to cup the balls in such a way that you create tension. We always end up touching the balls on this. Yes. Yes. I do that too. Let's go up touching the balls on this. Yes. Yes. I do that too. Let's go.

Holding the bull from. Yeah. You have to make it like smooth enough so that like when the, when the electric razor hits it, it's not like. Try shaving a circle. The balls. Yeah. Now that is.

Yeah. Little freaking vagina lips are little circles. Yeah. You just give them a little tug. I suspect you have a similar. Yeah. You have a similar thing where you have to like tug it a little bit. I've never tugged anything. Yeah. Yeah. you have a similar thing where you have to like tug it a little bit.

I've never tugged anything. Yeah, you got it. This might be my problem. You have to create tension. So shaving a face teaches you because the face is always on display and you can't have any nicks or bumps. So you are always creating tension on your skin and short strokes. Pussy, very easy. Little upside, put the legs back. Yeah, I can't put my... your skin and short strokes. Pussy, very easy. Upside,

put the legs back. Yeah, I can't put my... What do you think I'm doing? No, that's why he's doing it. That's why he's shaving the pussies. As a woman, it's harder to shave your own. I'll shave your pussy. Okay, no. That's behind the paywall.

That's behind the paywall. We'll be shaving. After Ludwig bailed on my protein taste test, you know, dude, go off. Go off. Do whatever you want to do.

That's right. Did you, was that a fun protein taste test? It was a fun protein taste test. Yes. Commit, uh, what's the fuck?

Adultery? Adultery. Shave the man. Honey, I, what's Will's thing? He just shaved me. I like, I like the wayave the man. Honey, I... What's Will's thing? You just shaved me. I like the way, the professionalism, though. The way you described it when you were using your hand movements,

like gentle... It was all business. I think the person thought it was going to be sexual, and then it was all business. What a crazy... Marco St. Marco style. I went in James Marco St. Marco. I was like, get your fucking legs apart.

You're wasting my time. I think pussy is harder to shave. James Marco, St. Marco. I was like, get your fucking legs apart. You're wasting my time. I think pussy is harder to shave because like from a, from a societal norm perspective, women are expected to be hairless. And so as a, True, we can't use electric braces.

Yeah, when you're shaving a dick, you don't need to be as perfect because it, Okay. You don't need to be as perfect. Fair, fair. Not saying you should be hairy

because that's disgusting. Okay. Absolutely disgusting. You need to be manscaped. No, I'm kidding. If you need to be as perfect. Fair, fair. Not saying you should be hairy because that's disgusting. Okay? It's absolutely disgusting. You need to be manscaped. No, I'm kidding. If you want to be hairy, just don't talk to me. No, I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

But do your own thing, but my personal preference is to be a little less hairy. I agree. But you don't need to be as accurate as a female. Yeah, we're supposed to look like babies down there. Yeah. That's a weird way of putting it, but... Listen, this is the way I

say it. I don't think that everybody should shave. If you don't want to shave, that's your thing. Everybody has their own thing. But for me, pussy is a restaurant. I eat there frequently. What would you do if you find a hair in your food? Send it back. Yeah.

I also apply the common courtesy of you know has to speak to the manager shaving myself so i'm a fucking hairy guy yeah you i gotta do a lot more upkeep than the average person also i don't mind hair above the vagina yeah that makes sense yeah you you're never gonna hear gay i know i i really but if i were to theoretically have sex with a vagina okay i just the vagina vagina um i would it have to be hairless like completely have we become a sex ed podcast yes okay sorry sorry sorry sorry no it's my fault it's my fault okay if you want to have hair, have your hair. We support all hair. We do.

We are all everything. Some of you bitches need to shave is what Austin is saying. Okay. Well, let's move on to something more interesting than that. Athleticism. That's right. We have the premier quarterback. I'm not talking about Aaron Rodgers going to the Jets.

We're not going to be doing that today. We're going to be talking about... Well, I have a tight 15 minutes. We're going to be talking about Austin, Mr. Motherfucking Show. The second openly gay NFL athlete. Yeah. Austin Show.

Throwing heaters. Put on a show. Yeah, I threw nine touchdowns. Had 185 yards passing on a 35-yard field. That's huge. That's huge. That's huge. He also hugged Soda Poppin' like no one ever has. Yes, I definitely got more than he bargained.

The other thing I would say is two things. This is a double-edged sword. Okay. You were unexpectedly faster than I thought. Really? Yeah, you were very quick. However, when you ran with the football, you ran like Super Mario.

It was like a very like taught motion. I've always ran weird. It's very upright. Yes. Really? I used to hunch over. You can pull it up. It's very Super Mario.

That's so funny. It's on Reddit. Is it? It's on Reddit. Yeah. It's on Reddit. I try not to look at Reddit. Yeah.

Me neither. Yeah. We'll talk about that in a second too. We don't need to. Yeah. Unlike you and I, Austin had a lot of fans after this football game. Really? People on Reddit were glazing him, which is weird because-

Maybe I need to play football. No, they'll still hate you. You're a woman. Let's be real. They'll go back to hating me as soon as something else comes up, I'm sure. No, no, no. You do have the benefit of not streaming as much. Yeah, that is helpful.

I think as weird as that sounds- You're less likely to say something you shouldn't you know, not streaming as much. Yeah, that is helpful. I think as weird as that sounds. You're less likely to say something you shouldn't when you don't stream as much. Or say something that you should that gets misconstrued. Yeah, true. True. Or weaponized against you. Yeah. But it is, if you look at like Topless Ellis this past week, it should show up.

Baker Gayfield, something like this. Yeah, people were saying, people were calling him Baker Gayfield. That's so funny. Which, but in like a positive way. Oh, there's one.

Oh no, not the E-Rob one. Anyway, shut off the sign in with Reddit Google thing. Regardless. Regardless. Yeah. You were throwing heaters. Yep.

I was. You were lasering them. Yep. I was. Afghans got a lot of the credit and you were upset. Wait, how did you know this? How did you know this? We had a conference.

We had a phone conference. Oh, God. Look, you forgot that we had a phone conference. I know. I just didn't know we were airing this out publicly. This just in. Austin's picking on a small streamer. See, there you go.

Small streamer. Muslim man. Let's cancel him now. streamer. Small streamer, Muslim man. Let's cancel him now. Thank God for recovering. Here's the deal. I went out there and threw nine touchdowns. 185 yards passing. You also had to touch Soda Poppin, who is no longer a twink.

Exactly. I put a lot out there. I am so happy. I couldn't be happier for Afghans getting the MVP. You're so fake. You am so happy. I couldn't be happier for Afghans getting the MVP. You're so fake. You're so fake. I couldn't be happier. Look at your face.

For my teammate who put it all out there on the field for becoming the MVP. I just thought maybe perhaps I should have gotten a little bit more recognition. Would you say it's homophobic that you did not get the recognition that you deserve? I could taste the air got more bitter. Look, I was a little upset when I didn't get, I didn't get a post game interview from Elena. And that really upset me. You did say that that's the reason why I didn't get MVP.

Look, there was somebody on Reddit that agreed with me. Okay. No, but realistically, if we're being realistic. Brother, you should never say that. Afghans had a hell of a game, and I'm so proud of him. I think the reason Afghans got MVP is he came in big in clutch time. Yep. And also, he was the last pick.

Well, technically, not really, but then ended up being the second to last pick. Last pick. But no, but seriously. Let the man have his underdog story. Look, I couldn't be happier for him. I really couldn't be. You literally can't even say it with a straight face. I couldn't be happier for him.

I couldn't be. Look, I'm so happy that I. I'm so happy that I flew halfway across the country to help him. It's great. No, you're right. Fuck Afghans. No, I love the guy. I love the guy.

Yeah, yeah. Let's roll the highlight reel. Oh, you want to? March can't find the highlight reel. You can just go to Nick's channel maybe and look at the top. You did personally say. Hassan's exposing me. I did want the MVP though of course no no that's not what I was talking about you did just say a lot of people on Reddit agreed with me which is one comment which is the worst you should never

say that oh yeah you can say everything you want about Afghans don't ever say that okay that's how you know you're wrong yeah but look I don't want to take up too much time it's been a lot about me let's talk about everybody did you also play football well no i had a six hour delay and then my flight got canceled so i thought will was i thought will was not uh wait has caroline just been in texas for a week oh my gosh because it would have been it would have been chilled to have you on the protein taste test. Oh, man. Look at that. Let's roll it back.

Who did you throw that to? Oh, Cypher? Look at the footwork, Will. It's good pocket. Were you surprised? Look at this. Unbelievable. Oh, look at him.

You're speedy. That's very good. That's very good. Good pocket presence. Great awareness. Yeah. Anyway, it was great. It's not worth watching.

Wasn't the MVP, but, you know, look. Afghans deserved it, okay? He deserved it. I don't want to take anything away from him because, like, the guy went out and put on a clinic. It's been a busy week for all of us. We've got Diablo. You are dodging, like, people yelling at you for the streamer awards well

people are really mad that i need a personal assistant that's the new thing that they're really saw that after after i do a massive show they're like you know what fucking privileged twitch streamers need personal assistants fuck them and i was like okay i've seen that a lot of people are like oh they're circle jerking like they're doing circles which like we are kind of but also like you know it's content or maybe you have empathy for people who have the same profession as you do because people outside of that very nuanced profession can't understand the pitfalls that also come with the the money and the attention yeah yeah i mean i think i think end of the day, streamer awards, one of the best things

that was ever said to me was when Asmongold first won and he told me, he's like, I've never won an award before. He's been streaming for years and he's never been patted on the back by his colleagues

and said, hey, you're sick, you know? And so, but like that's one big purpose of it. But I will say the overall purpose is just to get everyone together. Like,

and my way to do that is to have some gold trophies uh it's more important to have this family reunion once a year and get everyone to like squash their beef i know but there's no drama if you squash beefs well i would prefer that let's all just play among us again i like that there was a lot of drama when people were playing i've never got invited to lobbies and I still think about it. You and train wrecks both. Okay. Um, we'll, we'll,

we'll stay away from that subject, I think. Uh, but there's a, I mean, I, I, I'm a firm believer at this stage that like,

there's a no good deed that ever goes unpunished. Not to be like, oh man, we're complaining about our fucking lives or whatever, but that's kind of what podcasts are for. yeah i did a uh i did a a puppy adoption stream today how did that go did you find a puppy i guess there's no puppy in the house there is no puppy in the house well there is one fiona's here um but no i uh we went to three different places including the la city uh animal City Animal Services Shelter.

I couldn't watch because every time we walked past a puppy, I got really sad. And so I couldn't watch. Yeah, it was hard. It was definitely, you know, there were some really good moments. There were some really cute moments. We got to, like, you know, play with an entire litter of, like, pipple puppies. They let us do that, which was so sick. And, you know, I decided, we'll do we'll do something good and oh here it is this is like

one of the best parts oh my god and you didn't take any of them home you piece of shit i know i agree little scrunchie boys you even have a heart? Adopt every puppy in Los Angeles. By the way, I found out it is $500 to adopt a pet in Los Angeles. So in different places. Jesus Christ. In different facilities, they have different prices. Is there taxes associated with that? NKLA? No.

NKLA. I'm also convinced that there is an underground puppy ring in Los Angeles. There's a problem. Where any time a designer dog goes on the website it doesn't exist they've already adopted it and then they sell it what do you mean i'm telling you oh in the shelters in the shelters i tried to adopt a dog for like months before i got farley who was a rehome uh-huh But I tried to adopt one from the Los Angeles, like kill shelters.

Uh-huh. And I wanted a golden retriever. Uh-huh. And anytime there was a golden retriever, I would see it on the website, I'd call them about it, and I'd go there, and on like 12 separate occasions,

the dog wasn't there. They'd be like, oh, it's already been adopted. Yeah. And I was like, this was posted today. No, I think there's a lot. They'd be like, oh, it's already been adopted. Yeah. And I was like, this was posted today. No, I think there's a lot of people that just, like, there's a lot of people that are, like, looking at it.

This is my conspiracy theory, by the way. Interesting. I think L.A. is so massive, and there's a lot of people that are looking for, like, you know, new dogs, specific dogs, myself included. And I think that's part of the reason why, like, it's impossible to find a dog like that. It's not it can't happen i'm thankful for it i mean there was a there was literally led me to farley yeah there was a literal white husky puppy i saw that that i was

playing with and um you know that was i mean that was a straight up white husky puppy. You know what I mean? That is an incredibly, that's a rare breed. Yeah. It's a rare coat. Oh. He's so cute. He was very cute. You could never have a husky. I can't have a husky.

They have to be walked like three times a day. Exactly. Yeah, you couldn't. That's why I want like a big dog too. I feel like it'd be, it'd be torturous for the dog. Have you thought about getting a cat? No, absolutely not. Oh my gosh. What a cute? No. Absolutely not. Oh, my gosh.

What a cute puppy. I'm not going to lie. I came 360 on cats after I heroically saved a cat from the highway. Thank you. That was amazing, by the way. Yeah. It's the most will enough thing that's ever occurred. Well, yeah.

One thing that we wanted to do, like, one thing I wanted to do was basically just, like, you know, take away at least one hurdle. Because, like, when puppies are getting homed, like, still background checks like they don't just like give it off to anybody in these shelters right there's still a lot of stuff but one of the things is this financial barrier that they implement in a lot of instances they lower that barrier anyway like the la the la shelter is actually uh 50 off and it's usually a hundred dollars but then they do 50 off on sundays whatever it's like i do think there's some part of the fee just being a dam for like hey if you can't afford a fee for a dog yeah yeah exactly um but like it obviously a lot of those fees also

cover the medical charges and things of that nature but like people are you can't really go and get a dog if you're not super able to do that anyway like they try to limit that as best as possible so i thought i'll give money to these uh you know to these places that we're visiting but they didn't know about it either ahead of time like i just straight up like randomly was like i think this would be a good idea yeah if i do that peg for doing that but people got so mad at me so insufferable man peopleable, man. People got mad. What are they mad about? They said it's irresponsible because like

random people who want to murder dogs will now be able to get them for free. Oh, shoot. Oh, God. That is why you should never do anything good.

Yeah. That's my philosophy. They said one guy was really mad because I didn't go to like a, like a, you know, kill shelter or didn't go to like

an actual county animal services, which I did, but he just didn't go to like an actual uh county animal services which i did but he just didn't know about it but he he just wanted to yell you know what i mean well you're i think you should change your name to hasana beast because you're becoming mr beast more every day yeah that's another thing a lot of people were mad at me saying this guy fucking hates mr beast but then he's doing this shit like and then everybody loves it when he does it first of all nobody loves it when i do anything let's get that out of the way and two i never even fucking got mad at mr beast yeah i was gonna say which is you know which is when i realized like oh it's just you know people also are upset i saw on twitter uh one reply was well he did it

so publicly dude like is is this what you have to do to do a good deed you have to sacrifice everything be completely selfless go homeless never have any joys in your life that's the only way you can do anything then why don't you everybody is capable of doing something you know what person on twitter sell all your personal possessions. Everything. Completely. Strip down to nothing but your bodysuit and live in filth and nothing and give it all to charity because that's exactly what the expectation is. Like diogenes.

God, it's so weird. The thing is, the thing is like, one, they do say that all the time. Like unironically, that's not even a joke. That's like a straight up ask. Later on, when he was like shitting on me, he's like, you have a $5 million house. And I saw and i saw the comments everyone was like yeah he should sell his house he should like uh how's homeless people in his house like uh and and then you know but they're not gonna fucking be like all right respect to

him for this ridiculous demand regardless and won't solve the problems the problems are systemic but um the other thing is i actually forgot what i was going to say god damn it i i had a good thought in my mind but now i'm now i'm blanking out i'm spacing out on it um oh uh it made me realize that like obviously no good d goes unpunished that's one but two uh people make assumptions about you off of YouTube videos that they watch and not necessarily like the actual thing. Because with respect to the Mr. Beast thing,

like I was very clear, made numerous videos on it. Very obvious what I was saying. Mr. Beast agrees with it. I talked to him personally as well, privately. And yet people were just like well i saw candace owens say that you hate mr b's so now i just think you hate mr b's i'm like motherfucker i know him like

i know frustrating i will say that you can only control so much of your own narrative when people just decide things but you know what makes me feel better is there's a few hundred thousand people that hate taylor swift and i think she's amazing so well not that it's probably more it's not like that many tons but yeah like an entire country's worth no yeah most likely a small country you know what i'm saying like if they hate someone that i think is so great all because of something they just don't know her then i can i've started to like try to apply that to myself like people getting mad at me for saying i need a new assistant because i just do and then being like people upset at you about that because Then I can, I've started to like, try to apply that to myself. Like people getting mad at me for saying I need a new assistant.

Cause I just do. And then being like, people upset at you about that because, well, specifically for my assistant, I said, I don't want them. I need them in LA, but I don't want them to make their own content. I don't want an assistant that makes their own content. The reason being is I don't want them over at my house. Have you found an assistant yet? I think I have.

I have a recommendation for you. Oh, great. Okay. Well, we'll talk about it. But I. I would be your assistant. You would be awful. You would be the worst.

I would hate that. But. But. That was coincidentally one of the recommendations. Doesn't care about making his own content. That's for sure. Got him. The whole idea of being like a very, a privacy thing

where it's like, even if this person went home and streamed League of Legends, you know, they could be like, oh, I was at Cutie's house today and her and Ludwig

are in a fight. Like, you know, like, so I just don't want some of them. There's plenty of people that are interested

in being a PA that doesn't want to make content. People, that was a big thing people were mad about. Another thing they were mad about

is I said like, has to be okay with doing dishes. I am, I do baking streams on the weekend. I used to be a professional cake artist. As my job is to push the go live button. And so my PA, their job is to try to keep me on camera for as long as I can. So if I'm exhausted and I think, oh, I have two hours worth of dishes,

I'm going to end early so I can do these dishes. That takes away from camera time. So it's better for PA to do the dishes just for baking streams specifically not like my dishes every day but even then I mean I did want a PA to do my dishes every day that could be a thing too PA's there are P's they do that but people are mad they're like just hire a dishwasher and I'm like I'm not I can't hire a dishwasher for two hours a week I'm trying to fill my PA to have 40 hours a week so also you you put it down as a lot of people fail to understand this for some weird

reason, but like, you know, not that this is about socialism, but people always be like people, people don't realize that like you're being upfront about what the job requirement is. Like, I'm like, it's not like you're, it's not like you're dropping it on someone and being like, Oh, you're my PA now do the dishes, bitch. Let's go. You're like, this is a very well-paying job. this is not this is not minimum this is a nearly double minimum wage like this is like you have made that you have been up front with the expectations and people

can choose not to apply if they don't want to yeah but people are very mad about like i i i get like i don't know people people have very uh false notions about like about jobs without dignity. It's like minimizing the job itself when you're like, oh, how dare you ask them to do the dishes? And I don't really understand it if it's the requirement. I think that as long as people are paid well, as long as they're paid well and they're happy in their position and they have some level of fulfillment, some level of autonomy as far as what they can and can't do,

what they can set boundaries on. Can I maybe make an assessment? Yeah. Did you label it a PA? Yeah. Okay. I think people are upset because they think the term PA means production assistant and not personal assistant.

Wait, what did I write? I think PA means personal assistant. No, PA would think production assistant so in that case which by the way production assistants doing well no doing dishes for baking stream yes yeah doing dishes just randomly no yeah that's what i mean like production assistants would do the dishes on a baking oh no i said personal assistant oh okay never mind no i think people are just more mad that you're like asking for a personal assistant yeah people were mad about that they were like who does who does this streamer think she is she like needs a personal assistant her life's so hard and i'm like i just

put on a show for half a million people i do need help a lot of people have personal assistants i could use one myself and i don't even work as hard as you what what would be the purpose for you to have a personal assistant? There's a lot of inconveniences in my life that a lot of you wouldn't understand. That's, oh my God. You wouldn't trust a personal assistant. It is funny though because like, again, people tell me that. I'm thinking about starting a service.

People get mad at me for not having one all the fucking time. And they're like, dude, you could have had like someone actually handle this stuff for you ahead of time and make better content. Which like, albeit is kind of true. But again, I would never, I would, I would not have one for that exact same reason. Oh my God. People would fucking destroy me. It was, it was, I mean, it's definitely interesting. I think it's, it's just hard.

People just want to be mad is what I'm, I'm feeling more and more like the internet. People are just angry and it's very defeating. It's like, why are we using this? I think people feel a a lot of despair there's a sense of despair in the air for them they feel like their you know future opportunities are shut off they will never recover the the boomer aesthetic that they looked at the american dream white picket white picket fence a good job with a pension car able to send your children off to college. That stuff is never going to happen for them. So they get angry and then they lash out at whoever is the most accessible.

And people who are extremely online who aren't really like real celebrities, but at least have like the veneer of a real celebrity, even though, you know, with a giant pay cut in comparison to a real celebrity with a lot more work that they put in comparison to like an actor or something. Well, output is also seen as like marginal and silly and dumb and stupid, which, you know, there is some truth to that. We are very accessible. So people make us their target all the time.

It happens. Yeah. I think part of it is you look at a finished product, you look at a public person and see their life. A lot of times you can become envious, especially if things aren't going your way. And there's always that question of like, why them?

And obviously there's a luck factor to this, but I think a lot of people ultimately, usually it's luck is a huge role. One of the hardest things in the world though, is to keep working without encouragement, right right like a lot of things like jobs like atypical paths in life there's the gratification of a check there's the gratification of like moving up a ladder and ultimately entertainment is very scary because in the in the fledgling phases of that career you basically you're that meme of like carving in the dark

with the diamonds somewhere down the path and it's a gamble yeah it's a gamble and it's and it's brutal uh i think that's partially the vitriol towards public creators is like you realize the luck and and and the kind of the ridiculousness of celebrity, but also I think anytime you're a public person and you disagree with someone's worldviews, I think it's sometimes hard to have empathy for someone you perceive as having more than you. Right, that makes sense. Yeah, for sure.

I recognize all that, which is why I'm always like, look, you're yelling at the wrong guy. I feel you. I see where you're coming from. You can yell at me all day, but it's not gonna make the world a better place for you at all it was funny it was funny because there's a few people that are like what happened to your old pa and i was like she's going to school to

become a doctor like i ate her yeah like well yeah like clearly she wasn't happy that's so loaded because like that that is the worst part about it though is like there's so much it's so cynical it is so and instead of being like instead of being like oh okay well i guess i was wrong your old pa is now becoming a doctor and like you know uh continuing on with her career choices uh they double down and they're like well i'm gonna look for something else to feel like i was right all along. They're like, so she wasn't happy and that's why she left. Because clearly her only goal in life was to be a PA. It's like, yeah, it's like, yeah, no, that doubling down and then like looking for additional reasons

to hate this micro niche celebrity that you fucking despise for some weird reason is what also festers a lot of the negative stuff that is in our field for sure it also happens to me much more after i do these events people seem to get really mad at me and i think i i've been calling it the pokey main effect where it's like you're a woman and you're now on a pedestal let's knock her down as much as we can oh i feel the pokey main effect all the time because like i sometimes i zoom out and I'm like, why do people get so fucking mad at Poki all the time? It's like she's just breathing.

And it's like, I don't know. She's a. People are mad about Poki. People are mad at Poki when that fucking weirdo that I guess like worked at Twitch or whatever. Yeah. Was like trying to. Like blackmailing her. Blackmailing.

Like saying that they were in a relationship to her fans so he could like solicit sexually explicit photos from pokey's fans also simultaneously saying like he had sexually explicit photos of pokey and people were still mad at her there's like oh who's this innocent employee like we don't even fucking know this guy's like yeah exactly you don't know the guy like it was handled with clearly the company took action before anything else fucking happened they kept the dude's privacy on top of that which i don't know i think that's like a little bit too charitable if you ask me yeah and you're still fucking taking the side of a guy when you don't even know the guy like there is no there is no guy that you know in that situation you don't know their boundaries

you've heard the story you've heard what has happened you know in that situation. You don't know their boundaries. You've heard the story. You've heard what has happened. You've heard that people have taken action, and you still are like, I'm going to ride for this faceless, lifeless guy that I... Son, he does have a penis. It's just like, it's weird. It's a very, it's weirdo behavior.

You're being goofy as fuck. You're like riding for sexual assault, I guess. And like, and you know, being gross to women. Listen, everybody's aired out their very personal, very serious gripes. So now it's time for me to air out my very personal, very serious gripe. I work out on my Peloton bike

because I'm trying to lose weight. And so for now, I have been doing an hour to two hours every day on the Peloton bike before I go to the gym. Two hours sucks. And I watch television. Typically, I watch anime. I've made my way through all of Fullmetal Brotherhood.

Oh, no. Or Fullmetal Brotherhood. Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood. I've made my whole way through Hunter x Hunter again. Also great anime. And so now I'm on to a new anime. Gossip Girl. Well, that's, no.

Really good. I picked up an anime. It's a real niche one that barely anyone watches called One Piece. Oh, wow. And for anybody who doesn't know about One Piece. I don't know if you're going to be able to get through it. Well, One Piece has many episodes. Yeah.

Many, many episodes. It's only a thousand. It's also. A thousand episodes. More than a thousand. It's also a little dated. It's only a thousand. It's also- A thousand episodes. More than a thousand. It's also a little dated. It's also a little dated. It came out in like 1994.

1,049. Yes. Holy shit. There you go. So I'm on my Peloton, and I am sometimes tweeting from my Peloton because I'm a sassy little bitch with a tight ass. And I'm watching episode like 11 and I'm like this really isn't hitting yet I know this is supposed to get good it's got it

doesn't hit for a time stands so I tweet from my phone ladies and gentlemen I am making my way through one piece when does it get good because I'm on opposite episode 11 and I'm struggling yeah Yeah. Oh, no. People were very mad at Will. Oh, no. People were very mad at Will. Wait, have we all just been bullied this week? Pull up the tweet. I mean, this is like a...

Oh, my God. I usually don't like to talk about this too much. This tweet has five million impressions. 298 quotes. Well, to be fair, you did put a GIF of Luffy on there, too. So, like, you know people were- What about that? Yeah.

Five million impressions. Five. Okay, Carl Jacobs responds to it too. What did Carl say? He told me episode 100. Some people said episode 500. Most said episode 30, which in retrospect, let me put this riot to bed.

I'm enjoying it more. Are people upset at you because you weren't enjoying this? Some people verbatim said, if you don't enjoy it for episode one, you are uncultured swine. Some people said it was a bad take. We should slit your throat, throw you in a shallow grave,

piss on your body. Those words exactly. No. Are you paraphrasing? No, he's exaggerating. He's exaggerating. But people were like, people were very upset.

Some people said though, if you don't enjoy it from episode one, you do not deserve it. Wow. No, I think some people were also saying that like, you know, if you don't like it in the beginning,

you're just probably not going to like it, which I think is fair. It's not for everyone. It is. That is the worst take. But it's not good for- the first episodes are so wrong and then as they get going it's like okay i'm invested in the characters okay yeah it's not pausing right now no it's not for everyone that is for sure i say this all the time uh i think that uh how many how long is an episode? It's just 20 minutes.

But like it also, it gets even more condensed when you get like closer. I'm at 500 right now. I started watching. I started watching One Piece in like October. Sorry, Austin. I know we're talking about like nerd shit and not like. We don't like it. We both don't like it.

By the way. I want to offer. I don't deserve One Piece. I want to offer something. Because it's torture. Yeah. I want to offer something to Crunch't deserve One Piece. I want to offer something. Because it's torture. Yeah. I want to offer something to Crunchyroll. If you're watching.

I don't think Crunchyroll watches us. Well, someone can tag Crunchyroll. No, you'd be surprised. I got some fans of Crunchyroll. Okay. If Crunchyroll wants to lay down the gauntlet, I will watch every single episode of one piece from my bike. Oh my God.

From my Peloton live on stream stream-a-thon. But everything I make, everything I make, they match that amount. We give it all to charity. Whoa. That's a fucking, if you don't,

because the one piece is real. I love that. That's a great, That's a great idea. It's just like... I will be a size zero and I might die. You would die. It's 1,000 episodes. How many hours is that?

1,000 episodes, 1,000 to 4,000 episodes, 20 minutes. How are you doing on your journey to leaning out? Oh, I look really good naked. I had a gay guy message me. He does look really good. Can we pull up the... Yeah, go ahead and pull up the picture. Can we pull up the photo that Will posted?

437 hours. Oh, that's too many. That's a lot. How many days is that? I think that's four weeks. Oh, my God. Okay, also, Hasan, did you talk about how I got robbed of MBP on... 18 days?

That's not bad. No. I'm getting messages from people. Wait, what? We you talk about how I got robbed of MVP on Twitter? 18 days? That's not bad. No. I'm getting messages from people. Wait, what? We'll talk about that later. Okay. I would have to say. I had a gay friend.

Can you show the gay picture that Will posted? Wait, what was gay about it? You were shirtless. You were shirtless, and it gets to the gays. And Austin liked it. Yes, I did like it. Yeah, I mean, this is a gay photo. This is a gay photo.

You didn't even know. Austin asked a question earlier. You can't. So, look. Imagine Ludwig did that. I get a DM. Leslie's sitting next to him. She's like, Ludwig.

Listen, his balls are all over the internet. Let's not defend him. So, Cutie, from our mutual, I get a message from my- I love this mutual. Our very gay graphical artist that does all our designs. Sure. Well, everyone knows who it is.

And they say, I don't want to be gross, but oh my God. And I say, you're so gay. And then he says, God, he's just so fucking hot. Like, you know when you look at something sexy

and your dick does that thing where it has a little contraction? Oh my God. That's how I'm feeling right now. It's the back. His back is so wide. I said, oh my God, ha ha ha, uncomfortably. Show the, show the, yeah.

I should tell him. Visuals. I didn't laugh uncomfortably. This is part, we have these conversations all the time. He said, tell him I want his entire upper body inside of me. Sir. And then I responded with, okay him I want his entire upper body inside of me. Sir.

And then I responded with, okay, I get it. But I just want to say, I wanted to tell you that because the gays are looking, they are watching, and they are liking it. You look too good, and I don't like it. Listen, I want to say two things. I don't like it. That is the most foul thing I've ever heard.

And B, thank you. That is an most foul thing I've ever heard. And B, thank you. Yes. That is an incredible ego boost. If I could physically do it, I would climb in your ass. Yes. Shoulders first. Oh, my God. You look too good.

You need to stop. I'm going to start. We're supposed to do a nearly new calendar. I'm not doing it. I'm in. Me too. You're supposed to do a nearly new calendar. That is true. I can not doing that. I'm in. Me too. You're supposed to do a nearly nude calendar. That is true. I can wear

an apron. I want my picture for my birthday month. It'll be, um, I'll be in the kitchen and there'll be two birthday cakes covering my boobs. Wow! I love that. That would bang. The gauntlet has been thrown down.

Back on! Nearly nudes back on the menu, boys! The gauntlet has been thrown down. Yeah. I mean, Ludwig is definitely. Nearly nudes. Back on the menu, boys. Ludwig is supposed to be on it as well. Why is Ludwig in your calendar? Oh, it's like friends of the show. Oh, okay.

I. I. Just in general, we want to see him naked. That's why. Yes. I would love to do this. I try to do an underwear photo shoot with Hassan and Will. Hassan declined.

Fuck yeah. 100%. Which I don't understand. I'm not ready for it. Your cock is a lot bigger than mine. It doesn't matter. Hassan declined. Fuck yeah. 100%. Which I don't understand. I'm not ready for it. Your cock is a lot bigger than mine. It doesn't matter. I'm not ready for it. I'm not ready for it.

It's not the penis part that is the problem. When are you going to be ready? Give us a date. But I will stuff my underwear if we do a photo shoot. If you give us a date, you'll stick to it. I have been on a journey for a very long time. April 15th. No, no, no.

July. July? All right. Okay. I am working i'm worried it's not about it i will not be working on my body we will be photoshopping my body okay that's fine hey we will photoshop our bodies hey don't worry you boys got a lot of catching up to do oh that's true austin is demonstrably the most in shape out of all of us. All I'm going to say is- I'm just leaner. Austin, all I'm going to say is, when the fat comes off, I'm big, big. Okay. Oh.

Okay. I'm big, big. You know- I'll take that as a- Look, I love your body, and it's not a competition, but I'll see you in July. Have you ever been asked to climb in a man's asshole shoulders first? Actually, I have. What? That's a thing?

Yeah. It was fancy. I guess that's a very common thing, I guess. In fact, not only did I get asked, I did it. I thought it was special. Actually, I have. What? That's a thing? Yeah. It was fancy. I guess that's a very common thing, I guess. In fact, not only did I get asked, I did it. I thought it was special. Oh, my God. How do you think I look like this? We call it the spelunk.

Yeah, 25 years ago, I climbed in a guy that looked like me, and that's where I am. What do you think Miley wrote the song about? Yeah. What song? It's the climb. It's the climb. Okay. Well, well.

I was going to talk about penis contractions. Yeah. Also, I love penis contractions. Let's talk about that. And also in the pay, after the paywall, we're going to climb inside of Will's asshole.

That's right. After on the paywall side, which you can access at patreon.com. Talk about your booty boot camps. No, I want to hear about this penis thing. Okay, let's do it. Can we talk about,

should we talk about it now behind the paywall? Your paywall? No, it's, it about this penis thing. Okay, let's do it. Can we talk about, should we talk about it now behind the paywall? Your paywall. No, it's all of our paywall. People's paywall. People's paywall. All right, I'm going to round this out. Ladies and gentlemen, thank you as always for tuning in to Fear,

and please do yourself a favor and check out all four of the amazing creators at this desk. If you are a Patreon member, we have some spicy penis contraction content coming up through the paywall. And also, Milf Manor episodes have been unlocked as well. And I'm going to eat my salad. And I will spend the next hour

trying to suck off a son, Will. Yes. So thank you as always. And we're going to let him. Go subscribe to my YouTube. We're almost at 100K. I want another button. If I get one, I'm giving the first button back to Marsh.

Yay. That's right. Also, please subscribe to the podcast for the juicy, delicious insider access. There's a second, the first playlist that Wilnef made was such a banger. There's a second one that's actually coming out as well on top of the bonus content that you guys can access there. And also, I'm going to do a plug that i never actually do i have a second channel uh i have a second channel where i have my uh vlog content up and more fun content that i'm posting on there the shinkansen vlog that just

came out invited to one of those vlogs you would have been invited to the protein taste test and the dog adoption i think you were trying to keep me away from lean beef, Patty. No. Well, I, you would have been great. There are, there are,

you would have been better than ones of people on Reddit who agree with me. You were literally supposed to be in Austin. You were supposed to be in Austin. You didn't check on me. That's insane. Okay. Well, regardless, I'm validating his feelings.

We'll be tweeting what cutie validated. Feelings will be validated further behind the paywall but yeah check out my second YouTube channel you can access it's a secret channel

I guess Hassan's Hassan YouTube I'll also put a playlist on the Patreon yeah and it's the top 5 Taylor Swift song

from all of her albums yes I will put a playlist on the Patreon no your playlist would be dog shit I'm canceling that wow no vetoing I'm vetoing from all of our albums. Yes. I will put a playlist on the Patreon. No. Your playlist would be dog shit. I'm canceling that.

Wow. Nope, vetoing. I'm vetoing your playlist. By the way, this upcoming playlist. Nobody wants to hear Frank Sinatra's great songs. No, no. No one wants Frankie Valli

and the Four Fucking Seasons, dog. Okay? This upcoming playlist, I already cooked it. It's already in the possession of Billy Ray of Brains and it's old heads. It's all old hip hop. Each week, we'll have and it's old heads. It's all old hip-hop.

Each week, we'll have a theme from this point moving forward. Oh, my God. Wow. What? Disneyland! Patreon has hit 15,000 subscribers, by the way, which means you're supposed to take us to Disneyland. Unfortunately, you're going to have to book us a night in the Star Wars Hotel.

Wait, that's in Florida? Yeah, that's the one we're going to. Wait, hold on. No, we, we, we should all do it.

We should do it. No, that's a better one. We need to do a podcast from Disneyland. We need to do a podcast from Disneyland. We can't talk about half the things from the cantina. Or the enchanted Tiki room. They don't give a fuck about that anymore.

I'm getting kicked out of Disneyland. I'll be really upset. It's the only thing that matters in my life anymore. I'm not even that excited about Disney. It's on my stream. When? When? When?

When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When?

When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When?

When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When?

When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When?

When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When?

When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When? When? when? Yes! When, when, when, when? I don't know. He feels so left out. He feels so left out. Don't worry.

You can come with us. Also, you were supposed to do it on my stream. What happened? Isn't there Gay Day? I have a bigger creator than you. I just got half a mil. I think there's a Gay Day at Disney World. Can we go to Gay... Gay Days are in October.

At least they used to be. Oh. Oh, fuck. I don't want to go for the Gay Day. Ew. I'll stream an hour of it and then we'll vlog for the Patreon.

Love that. Okay, we'll figure it out. I don't know if we'll be able to do that. Anyway, peace, everybody. See you on the other side. Peace. None of them are Mormons.

And so we're all cuddling. We're in our groups of two like Noah's Ark and Max all of a sudden his penis starts like flicking my back and I am like so uncomfortable he's doing the contraction

he was contracting near your butt I've had a guy cuddle with me and it was so hot do they do it on purpose? it's voluntary. I thought, that's why I called him ghost boners. No, it's voluntary. It's voluntary.

Did he think I was pretty? No. His penis was... That's your takeaway from this? Was he hard?