Fear& - QTCinderella Wants To Fight Cinna (Real) | Fear&

Episode Date: February 24, 2025

Drama. ✨EXTRA BONUS EPISODES ON PATREON✨ Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/FearAnd 🎧 AUDIO PLATFORMS 🎧 🔊https://linktr.ee/fearand ❤️ follow Fear&! ❤️ Hasan: https://twitter.com/Hasanthehun Will: https://twitter.com/TheWillNeff QT: https://twitter.com/QTCinderella Austin: https://twitter.com/Austinontwitter Marche: https://twitter.com/Marche Fear&: https://twitter.com/FearAndPod Chapters - 00:00:00 - we are here in utah! 00:03:29 - joseph smith the all american sphynx 00:05:10 - there is nothing going on in utah 00:08:09 - you will return to your body? 00:09:35 - austin forgot to tell qt how good of a time he was having 00:11:10 - hasan is darting qt cinderella 00:11:45 - ludwig has been in shambles 00:14:11 - do nothing and win, current score 11 - 2 00:16:21 - Zocdoc 00:17:02 - its gift giving time 00:20:50 - the legacy of the mormon battalion 00:24:02 - is austin show getting boring 00:26:46 - cinna was trying to slide?! 00:29:11 - you know what sometimes your man is hot 00:33:03 - the mormons are kind of reaching here 00:37:00 - you can't spend money on sunday?! 00:38:22 - Beam 00:40:04 - more soda shops in salt lake city than starbucks 00:45:20 - back to the gay bar conversation 00:49:08 - the judgement in utah is intense 00:51:40 - qt cinderella is so much happier here 00:53:14 - making a frap down the road 00:56:30 - more city talk, podcast just like salt lake 01:01:10 - screw it we are all moving to utah #hasanabi #qtcinderlla #podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I will eat you for lunch, Sinna. You know what? I think you should settle this. I think you need a boxer. And then, and then, don't worry. Sinna, I'm calling. Look, Ludwig didn't scroll enough, girlfriend. I'm scrolling. Alright, ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to another episode of the Fear and Podcast where the crew has traveled all the way to Salt Lake City, Utah to be here with the one

and only Cutie Cinderella in front of a cat. Joseph Smith as a Sphinx. Joseph Smith as a Sphinx, whatever that is. I have traveled out here, Hassan has traveled out here, Cutie has... I've moved here. I've come to the mountains. Cutie has a remarkable ability to be late to her own fucking podcast. After we came from different parts of the country and we were on time and I was getting a soda pop an hour and 30 minutes late. Yes the taping which is gonna be

Interesting to see if I can even get back home on time. You'll be fine. That's I'm freaking out a little bit This man was non-stop texting me this morning Getting through the airport. Oh my god. It was, it was, I don't know what, I don't know what it is, but I have the absolute worst luck when it comes to travel where like every bad thing that could possibly happen happens even though I have all of the precautionary measures set in place. What happened? It's just like you get stuck, you get stuck on a line on TSA We're like the other line where is your side-by-side with some bald dude and that bald dude actually passed through the security clearance like

45 minutes before you because the line that you were placed into has like I think eight families three people in wheelchairs like people that are trafficking lethal substances, explosive devices, members, you know, former members of Al-Qaeda. I don't know what was, that's the line that you were in. That was the line that I was in, and it was just the slowest line in TSA existence.

And like, back in the day, I used to get really mad. I'd be like, these guys freaking suck. They're not doing their jobs. And now I'm woke and I know what the actual problem is Which is that they just simply don't hire enough people. Yeah, cuz nobody fucking cares Yeah, so then I'm just like sitting behind the this family Who not only had multiple children, but we're also traveling with like a designer dog like Incredible it's like lady pick a struggle. You know what I mean like I'm happy with the dog travel

It's fine. You're fine if you want to traffic your little little kids. It's alright, but like you know not both Yeah, and pick one take us out of the two and then of course as always you know my Camera bag even though I'm just like bringing I'm here for like what two hours. Yeah, I brought nothing I brought just a bag with the equipment Yeah, and what's funny though is your flight like from LA to here is the same as if we just lived on opposite sides The flight the flight it himself is like not that long. It's just the the airport experience is like unimaginably cruel for no particular reason. Okay, Cutie, where the hell are we and what the hell is that?

Because a lot of people that are probably watching for the first time have no idea what is going on behind us. That's Joseph Smith. Okay, and what is a sphinx and why is he a sphinx? Do you do this? No, no, Mormons don't do that. Mormons don't do that. He shall see, what does that say? He shall see the trial and soul and shall be satisfied. It's just, it's a little park that apparently this was someone's backyard and they made

all these sculptures. Actually that man over there, which maybe we'll take our thumbnail picture with him. This was his backyard and he made all these sculptures clearly high on something. Yeah. Yeah, high on God. Love for God. And so there are a lot, technically that's like the spear of the Mormon temple is what that's supposed to be and it has Moroni on top of it. It's just beautiful. It's just

a tribute. Yeah, no, it's absolutely beautiful. I'm fucking fascinated by Mormons, because they just feel alien and not... I know this is gonna come across as a little insensitive, but they don't feel American. Like, they have a lot of... They have a lot of reverence for these interesting cultural artifacts.

It feels like I'm in a Tolkien novel almost, where they got like, they just have shred of swords sticking out of the rock back there. I don't even know what the hell that's supposed to be. But there's a rock back there, I was checking it out. There's a couple of homeless people in the back doing whippets as well. You know, other than that.

We thought it'd be cool to film here. That was a, yeah, that's a very normal experience for any major American city, but like Everything here the aura and the vibes are a little interesting. I don't know how to describe it. It's very interesting It's like there's nothing happening either. Yeah, it's kind of like like so much going on No, what are you talking about? I've been here for over 24 hours and it looks like it There's no like nothing's going. there's no people, there's no nothing. Okay, you're simply wrong. Okay. There's so much.

Okay, so I'm wrong. They can't even play basketball, do you talk jazz, they can't play basketball on Sundays unless it's the fucking playoffs, what are you talking about? There's so much going on. You had to go to an off-brand, possibly Catholic soda shop to be able to get us some real sodas

because every institution, every establishment in this godforsaken city closes down on Sunday. Isn't it kind of nice though take a life a little slower? It seems like nothing ever opens. What do you mean? I got here on a Saturday. I landed and I got in the car with you and we haven't seen I've only seen a few other human beings Well, there's a lot here suspicious a lot of people are being reverent Yeah, I think the only reason for the record we I had two ideas of where I had three ideas where to film We could have done any of the temples, right? But the main temple the Salt Lake temple it's under renovation for like earthquake. They're earthquake proofing it.

So I was like. Shouldn't God protect from that sort of? You would think, but like God's. But if God did it, it would be for a reason. Yeah, yeah. But we gotta protect against that reason. But like God gave them the premonition to earthquake protect it.

Yeah, aren't you supposed to take that El Den, if that's the case, you know? I don't know. You need to study more Mormonism. I think so too. No, I think they're just preparing it so then when God does return, some people call it the rapture,

he'll have a very nice home. Also, you know, when I- Okay, Mormons don't believe in the rapture. When I arrived here- Well, you know, I don't know if you know this, but Mormons believe in the second coming. So when Jesus comes back, so when you die, you're Mormon, you die,

you get buried in your temple clothes. So of course, you shouldn't get cremated, you should get buried. So when God comes back, the second coming, when he arrives in Eden, which is Missouri, he will, he will come to Zion, which is Utah. And that's what's so awesome about Mormonism, I'm going to cut you off, but it's like, they literally have like,ism, I'm gonna cut you off, but it's like they literally have like Like I feel like it's the only American-born religion that genuinely has like so much weird iconography and stuff and they just kind of took from everyone else

Oh, yeah, but then everything is placed in America. So they'll be like, oh, yeah, you didn't obviously Missouri. Yeah, and Jesus is white Yeah, oh they have the I mean, I don't know, Gabe, if you're listening, it's our editor, if you could pop up a photo of Mormon Jesus is the whitest Jesus. He's blonde. He's blonde hair, blue eyes, Beverly Hills Jesus. He has his talks, he has his filler. He's beautiful. Perfectly groomed beard. So when the second coming comes, your body, you will, um, you will come out of your grave.

You'll be returned to your body. That's metal. I like that. Yeah, so that's kind of cool. That's cool. So do you stay, like, like, decomposed or...? No, no, you get restored. Do you get to go to a younger age? Do you get to be 80 for the rest of your life?

I think it's when you... Wait, that's fucked. Yeah, wait, isn't it better to just like die at the age of 20 then right? So you can be like hot and young especially cuz um, I think it was Joseph Smith Joseph Smith had a vision So there's the four different there's hell obviously there's the terrestrial telestrel and celestial kingdoms And he was like even the terrestrial kingdom is more beautiful than anything you've ever experienced in your life so you would think you would just be like and then you know yeah but technically killing yourself is bad yeah yeah so you can't escape yeah so you just have to like hope to die of natural causes at 21 years old yeah so then you can wake up and be the most slay yeah the resurrection yeah

Mormons have loopholes for everything I'm sure they have a loophole for that, too I met a lot of gay Mormons while I've been here. Did you go to the gay bar yesterday? I did and I didn't tell me the vibe. I know so I sat there waiting I invited cutie to the gay bar and then she's like texting when you get there and then I forgot to text you when I got Crazy cuz I'm the only person you know here. No, I know That has to be deliberate. There's no way that that happened by mere accident. No, I have to be truthful. You're gonna hate me for this.

Cutie, I didn't want you there. No, I went to the gay bar and I was like, okay, I remember getting there. I was like, I gotta tell Cutie that it's a good time and then she'll come. And then if it's not a good time, I won't text her. I had my outfit picked out and everything. But I went and I started having's a good time and then she'll come. And then if it's not a good time, I won't text you. I had my outfit picked out and everything. But I went and I started having such a good time,

I forgot to tell you how good of a time I was having. I had a slutty little fit and everything. Wait, you were ready to go out? I could have met my wife. Okay, can I be honest? I wasn't sure you were that serious and I was just like, I don't wanna say anything. If the vibes were good, I'd be there.

But it was a lot of pressure. When somebody says, let me know if the vibes are good, and then like, especially Hassan. No I don't want to the vibes were good I'd be there but like it was a lot of pressure when somebody says let me know if the vibes are good and then like Like especially Hassan no No, cuz I wouldn't trust if you were like my the vibes are good And I've already given no because I don't say let me know when the vibes are good. I say no I'm not doing that. Please stop calling me Whereas if I was like, oh are the vibes good like I'll come. That means there's at least a level of FOMO with that association.

But you act like that's what I do. I just call him over and over again until he shows up, which is what I did to get him out here to Utah. By the way, for the record, OK, Firi Anders. OK, let's hear it. For the record, QD and I have been trying to hold this team together. Okay, we've got a makeshift staff.

All right. We got cameras sitting on a rocky road, scootish on a rickety table. It looks, I thought it was a ironing table. Yeah, it's an ironing board. And we're out here in a park in Utah, but through hell and high water, we needed to deliver this episode for the fear-anders

who wanted girly pop nation to come back. What if you just put me on an iPad for a week or two? No. That'd be fun. No, that's lame. What do you mean week or two? You're coming back with me. Yeah, we're taking you back. I'm not going on that airplane.

I'm gonna fucking dart your ass. Yeah, we're taking you back. After this episode is over, I'm literally choking you out. Yeah. And then putting ketamine in your body. Ooh. And force it, and shipping you like FedEx. Can't wait to see that clipped out of context This has gone on for far too long

I'm loving my new life in the mountains. The people of Los Angeles are suffering. Look at your boyfriend Oh, okay. Look at what you have done to him in your absence. Okay, I went to Tarik's birthday dinner the other night Mm-hmm. Okay. Okay, I went to Todd's birthday dinner the other night. Okay? Yeah. And Lordwook shows up, of course, an hour and 30 minutes late, partially because they had all informed him far too late when the dinner had actually started. He shows up wearing shorts. In the middle of the night, it's like 40 degrees out, he's wearing shorts, some, you know, weird ass t-shirt, whatever, and suspiciously cool shoes, or I think he was wearing Crocs again. Whatever. But you know what I'm talking about. He always does this weird dynamic where, like, one piece looks

fantastic. It's like an Italian-made, has-me-er thing. He's the random character generator on Sims. Yeah. Anyway, I'm like, Lovik, what the fuck are you wearing? Like, why are you wearing biker shorts? And he was like, aw, I ran out of clothes. He doesn't have any laundry. That's what he's been saying to me. Yeah, I don't have any laundry. I'm like, oh, I just realized, like, Cutie's not there. Wait, you do his laundry?

I send it in. Are you a tradwife? No, I'm a functioning adult is what I am. She's a tradwife. I'm just trying to get a functioning life. Like, I'm starting to think you're a tradwife, Cutie, because, like, he's fallen apart. Like, you've been away from that leg for like a month.

As he should. Speaking of falling apart falling apart from what I understand shorts You're not familiar with what Ludwig currently looks now. This is my first time This is a Ludwig hair reveal. Gabe you can post it You can pop it up as I when I you know show Austin this yeah, I just want you to brace yourself for this I'm ready This is what Ludwig currently looks like And he got tatted you've seen it already Oh bad, I can't even pretend to be nice about it. Oh, no

He said he just tweeted I keep getting jump-scared by mirrors. Oh, no, let me see him again Hold on. Let's see if there's a to be honest. That is that is look. I'm just gonna flat-out say it That is an insult to bald people. His head isn't right for it. No. No, and he had a decent hairline for the most part. He had an incredible hairline. He has such luscious hair.

Yeah. He just won gamer of the year. No, he's not winning it next year. Oh my God, no. In fact, I'll be honest, I think they're gonna take the award back. Yeah, I think they should. I think they're gonna take the award back.

This guy won gamer of the Year. It's disrespectful to the games. Look at it, Ludwig, what are you doing? What did he do, was it for charity? No. What was it for? No, that's the funniest part. It's just, I think it was a bet or something?

It was a marble. It was a marble. No way. The weakest reason to do that to yourself, I think. Is he at least gonna make a YouTube video out of it? Oh, of course. Yeah. Yeah. I just, I found myself being unable call me weak Being unable to find the capacity to be kind. Do you find him physically attractive still? No

He looks like a Lego head. It's that flat on the back. I said, oh, I guess your mom never picked you up. There are You know Uh oh, I guess your mom never picked you up. There are, you know, we have a real do nothing and win strategy here at the Fear End podcast and the yard keeps collapsing in and of itself as we just stand tall. It looks like a skinhead meeting. It does. Yeah, you got slime.

Yeah, now you got two balls. Aiden shaved his head. He shaved his head. Oh my gosh. They look, you know what? Nick is the only one that keeps them from being a clan meeting. Oh my god. And he- Nick is the only one that keeps them from being a clan meeting. Oh my god.

And he's ginger, so here's what's going on. It's worse than a clan meeting. They look British. They literally look the most British a podcast has ever looked now. They look like it's a- it looks like a train spotting ad. It's shocking. He called me, he like FaceTimed me to show me his hair and I said, oh wow Don't worry. There are plenty of people that don't care about looks. Hopefully you'll find one. So how did he react to that?

I'm so curious like Ludwig he said I love you dearly and I said bye Yeah, yeah what but but Ludwig if you're listening right now, which I know you watched the fear empire Bye. Oh. Oh. See ya. Oh god, you know what? But Ludwig, if you're listening right now, which I know you watched the Fearhand pie. He doesn't. Yeah, he watches. I know you watch. You're gonna see all this.

Ludwig, to make you feel better, if Hassan shaved his head, he'd be ugly too. I don't know about that. You have a flat head, kinda. I don't know about that. Yeah, it's kinda flat. What about me? Do you think I'd look good? Let me go this way.

This is what I've, you have curvature. Do I? No, I have curvature too. Yeah, but not as much. Yeah, I've done better than most. I've gone buzzed before. And people have complimented my head shape before. I don't think there's anything that could happen to you.

I hope your penis falls off. Things are happening to me all the time. I just don't really. I hope you just, yeah, your penis falls off. Things are happening to me all the time. I just don't really... I hope you just... I just don't really let it get to me. Things are happening all the time. I'm fucking salt lake city right now. Beautiful. Look how pretty.

It's Gorgina here. Hi Kaia. What doctor do you use? Oh really? That sounds stressful. You should take some of that stress out of your life with ZocDoc. What ZocDoc you ask? ZocDoc is the one stop website where you can line up all your doctor's visits. That's right. Kaia, stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to ZocDoc dot com slash fear to find an instantly book a top rated doctor today that's

zoc doc dot-com slash fear for all of your doctor needs first and foremost I have This is not lame, but I bought, whenever we travel, I go and buy everybody gifts. Oh wait, we bought you a gift too. Did you bring it? No, fuck. Wait, where is it? I left it in your car. Oh.

Alright, we're gonna go get your gift. Okay, well, I brought only Cutie. I bought Cutie multiple gifts from Japan, but this is the only one that I brought here because the entire crew is not here right now Yeah, so I still have everybody else's gifts including more gifts for cutie But I just wanted to give you a little present little intro for the for the situation hold on I'm gonna grab it Oh shit, this is kitty. Can I? Tell came out of his asshole I Zins oh, that's what I was looking for as well. Thank you Look I can I be honest, huh? I

Did get you a gift, but I left it at my hotel room in Japan. Yes, and can I be on extra honor? He's lying. I'm not lying. He's not he didn't get you shit. I repurposed the kiss And gave it to hooms no, it's oh, no, he's regifting I got a good and I was like shit I forgot to get cutie something. I was like, this will be perfect. Oh, it's a you gave it to someone else No, it's for you, but you got it for some drum roll. Ladies and gentlemen This is first gift of many from Japan all the way from Japan gift of many from Japan all the way from Japan Cinderella I hate it that is inappropriate wind up action it's two people 69 wind it that's right it's just the wiener Hassan what I got her a sticker last time and I

got dragged and you're gonna this is the first of many oh you got more oh no I'm just I brought this here to Utah specifically because it's the first time I'm seeing cutie since I got back from Japan but I bought a bunch of stuff for all of you guys this is the only thing you brought with you this is the only thing I brought with me because I didn't want to I still want to give everybody is he sucking a peanut no it's I think it's a woman oh it's a 69 wind up actually yeah you know to be honest doesn't look like two men I think it's a woman. Oh. It says 69, wind up action. You know, to be honest, at the beginning, I thought it was Donald Trump because of the hair. You can think about it like that if you'd like to.

I'm going to craft on it and paint it hyper realistic. It's up to interpretation. You know what? Oh my god, there's a penis on here. Yeah, he has a red tip. Do you think people jerk off to this? I hope not. Probably not.

Like, do you think they wind it up and just to this? I hope not. Probably not. Like you think they wind it up and just Eww, I hope not. Probably readily available pornography. Well, maybe in Utah. Oh, that's why. What? That's why I brought it here for you because Utah has been porn. Oh yeah, if you go to PornHub you can't see it. So, wait, Utah has been porn so I wanted- Well, go on your phone. No, no, hold on. I went on PornHub last night. What? I did and just to look I didn't jerk off or anything. Wait, what? Just to look? Guys, come on. Ihub last night. What? I did. And just to look, I didn't jerk off or anything. Wait, what? Just to look?

Guys, come on. I wouldn't do that. So anyway, so I go- There's nothing wrong with masturbating to porn. Yeah, no, I know, but I just, I didn't do that. It's weirder that you're just looking. Yeah, it's also, it's extra weird that you're being really defensive

about not masturbating to porn. Okay, I jerked off. All right. Congratulations. Gu guilty as charged. Okay, and it was sorry Joseph Forgiven and he probably also jerked off a lot Didn't you have like a million children? Yeah, but he had more wife so you don't need to jerk off any of that many wives I mean, I'm just saying what your a virile guy. Anyway. No, is it virile? No. Via, via talent?

Vir- Virality? Long story short. I'm gonna look it up. I could look up porn. In Texas you can't. Weird. Yeah. Oh wait. Oh because you probably went to the gay sites and the ones that are banned are like Pornhub. Did you go to Pornhub? No, Pornhub. Gay side of Pornhub, yeah. I'm pretty sure it's Yeepee! Okay, we have your No, Pornhub. Gays. What? Gays side of Pornhub, yeah. I'm pretty sure it's... Yeepee! Okay, we have your gifts, Sasan. Okay.

Thank you. That's funny. I can't believe you left this in my car. I just... I thought it was... You bought it. Austin is very good. Yeah, Virile is the right word.

I was right on this. Okay. Okay. Austin is... What is happening? He's taking a picture. Hell yeah. Okay. Austin is... what is happening?

He's taking a picture. Hell yeah. Nice to meet you. Okay, here's your first gift we thought you would like. The Mormon Bataleon. Mormon Bataleon Auto Tour. Yeah, you can read it, maybe. The legacy of Mormon Battalion, the 2,100 mile march

of the Mormon Battalion from Iowa to Southern California is one of the epic trailblazing journeys. See, kind of fun. See, we do care about you. What did they do along the way? Oh, wait. We don't know. Wait, can we present this next gift together?

Sure. It's a big one. How do you want to? We really thought of you when we bought this. Yeah, we did a good job. You also now need to check a bag on your way back because it's a knife. Or I can just bring it back later. I can just bring it back later. Thank you for the... No, it has to go with you.

It's a Utah knife. I'm not checking the bag. You have to check a bag. I'm not checking a bag. No, just take it through security see what happens. Yeah, I will get stuck in Mormon prison. Yeah. Look at this. It's a

It's a knife that says H on it. And it's got like a like a weird cork. We got this for Marsh, but I kind of want it. Yeah, I kind of want one too. Saltwater taffy. He should have been here. From the Great Salt Lake. Wait, do they extract the salt from the lake? Yeah.

Built on 1893 on the shores of the Great Salt Lake, Salterre Resort was the centre of social activity. Holy shit, that's sharp. And the taffy was produced from the salt from the city. Wow. Wow. What do you say about your gift, Asan? Thank you guys.

This is amazing. You're welcome. Wait, how do you close this? I don't know. I'll take a taffy. I want blue. Can I have one? Yeah, oh, they're kind of frozen.

So this is made from the salt of the Great Salt Lake. Thanks Marsh for giving us your candy. Wow, thank you Marsh. Here you go, I'm gonna take this back. Okay, all right. What are the flavors? I don't know, but they're pretty frozen. I ate blue, I think it's blue raspberry.

No, I ate white. White sounds awful. Tastes like. It is salty. It is really hard. I'm just gonna pull my... Austin, no. Dude, come on.

Put that up. I'm just kidding. I would never do that. It's really salty. Yo. That was a joke. I would have picked it up. Okay, come on. I just wanted to get a reaction.

He litters all the time. He loves it. I do not litter. I do not litter. You are a litter bug. No. No, I'm not a litter bug. Wow. I litter in a house. What?

In your house. Can I give you some? Wow. I think I'm getting boring. What do you mean? I was talking to a woman yesterday and she asked me a question and I'm like, okay, I'll answer it. And I start to answer the question and I see her nodding off and she fucking fully fell

asleep in the middle of my answer. Wow. Like in the middle of my answer, she was like, what do you do for a living? I was like, oh, I'm in digital media. How do you answer that? You say digital media? I said I'm in digital media, I host shows,

and I'm on a podcast with a leftist political commentator. You explain that. The first couple sentences was so boring, I get why she fell asleep. She literally was like this, she started nodding off. I was like, maybe she had narcolepsy or something I don't know. I did have I was telling Austin this I had a person I was talking to That they they like knew Ludwig or whatever they're talking to me and they're like, um, I have a question for you

Sorry if this is weird But and this is before I knew that they knew who Ludwig was and they were like, how did Ludwig get gamer of the year? And I was like, I don't know I don't have an answer for you like I should have gotten it or you know and I was like, I don't know. I don't have an answer for you. Like I should have gotten it or you know, I was like, or Austin should have gotten it. I said, or Hassan, if you know who any of them, they are. And he was like, oh, I know Hassan. I like Hassan and he has that gay guy

that he does a podcast with. And I was like, yeah, I'm on that podcast. He was like, no, I think it's a different one. And I was like, no. Yeah, I think she's valid for not knowing that you are on the podcast. If we check the record, you have been absent. I am only short like two from Will.

Wait, am I ahead of you guys? You're ahead of us. Which is great, because he's going on fucking vacation. Look, we can't keep this damn crew together I'll do the soul. I'll do a solo app you want to solo up girly pop nation. I'll do it Of course they're gonna love that's gonna be the top comment on the video We'll do it next week off. I'll give you a PTO so I can do it want weeks off I want weeks on for everybody. That's what I want. Well, you know what? I'll be honest is on in hindsight I wouldn't have taken this trip. Uh-huh.

Why? Because I feel bad now I'm missing too much of the podcast. You know what? I don't feel anything. I got it. Let's fix it. No, we're going to have the best episodes when you're gone.

I'm literally hiring a new gay guy. No. Cool. What? A way sicker gay guy. Wait, you're going to hire them? We're going to, yeah, we're leveling up with Aiden. Doing a casting call?

No, we're doing a bisexual guy for once What you need a gay guy? He's gonna get a den. We need it. He's not gay Which is totally Wow by erasure. No, I so I totally support a even better. I totally support a in his bisexuality I think that's great, and I love that for him. I support him I have more drama. What's that? Okay. So well I saw this what I know what drama you're gonna what is it the Cine drama? Cine. I have no idea what this is. Okay. We've got drama. We've got big-time drama. Big-time drama. I'm actually I'm gonna

pull it up right now. Yep. So so Ludwig is on his stream and he's pulling up people's chat logs, right and One of those chat logs being Senna's and I'm gonna go to Ludwig. I'm just gonna do slash user I'll do it right now. We'll get the live And he pulls up Senna's and he finds, you know, he's just scrolling through and Senna's been a fan She was in his chat in 2019 like oh Yeah, and he's scrolling through and the first message he sees, or one of the first messages he sees is Ludwig is so, so hot. Oh my god. And then, and then keep scrolling because it's like maybe that was, maybe it was a joke, who knows, you know, what, you

know, who knows. Keep scrolling and I have to find it verbatim. Who knows? You know what? You know who knows? Keep scrolling and I have to find it verbatim Okay, I need to figure out how to do slash user on my chat. I want to see what Sinna said Are you gonna be offended if she never said she probably was not you were hot? I just want to I don't even know how to do the user thing. I couldn't do it on yours I'm a modern yours. I think okay, um Yeah, Ludwig is just so so hot and then I Am a simp for Ludwig

So keep in mind in 2020 so August 29th is at 11 p.m Is Ludwig is so so hot or 8 p.m And then August 30th the next day at 10 30 p.m I am a simp for Ludwig and she's in Texas so it's even later for her and for the record night watching love I have to I'm calling I'm calling the bitch out Because she goes on Twitter she goes on Twitter, and she's like this had to be a dare This had like this was this was a bet for sure this had to be bitch It's two days apart and you're in chat the whole time spamming emotes And then you're and then you're like you're like yes. Yes. I'm a simp for Ludwig. Yeah

He he he hype but no it was not a dare You were sitting you sent another message that just said yes in ye and hype all within the same minute of saying you're simp for him Oh, no to it girlfriend. You know what? Oh, now do it, girlfriend. I'll be honest. You know what? I'm a defense Senna here, girl. How? I've been there.

What? Okay? Look, sometimes your man is hot and sometimes girls have to call it out. Wow. You know what? Wait, were you dating him at the time? Yeah. Was it public knowledge?

Yeah. Okay, you know what? I take it back. Senna, I don't know what the fuck you were doing. Especially, you knew who Cutie Cinderella is. She's gonna eat you for lunch. I will eat you for lunch, Cynna. You know what? I think you should settle this.

I think you need a boxer. And then, don't worry. She's at, Cynna, I'm calling. Look, Ludwig didn't scroll enough, girlfriend. I'm scrolling. 4 a.m. she sends a message. I went to bed to Ludwig and woke up here. What?

It's a little excessive. And then she sends a message. I went to bed to Ludwig and woke up here. What? It's a little excessive. And then November 17th, Ludwig didn't show this one on stream. Ludwig, TBH, I've never seen a handsome short man such as yourself. I wonder why I didn't show that one. Oh, that's funny. Yeah, so drama, drama, and you know what?

You know what? She was really into Ludwig. I took a chance on her. She had a thousand viewers and I said, come stay at my house. That was right around the time she came on the Pokey Friendship. Girl.

Just saying, just saying. So what would you do to her? Nothing, I don't care. Okay, okay. Well, I mean, honestly, well, if Ludwig had still had his hair, maybe it'd be a little different, right? Yeah. Maybe you'd come to his defense.

My hands are clammy watching this. What does that mean? The hoodie looks so good. Oh my gosh. Okay, the rest of it is kind of supportive probably, but we're reading it in a sexual way because of it. Yeah, I'm going to. I'm going to make her feel, feel I'm gonna make her squirm. I'm making you squirm. Yeah That's literally making her feel some type of way to apparently Believe short handsome man. No, it's just something to put in the back of my pocket my logs in Ludwig's chat Look nothing like that. Oh, I was gonna check you. I say I got yeah, okay. Let's see. Let's see

What is Sina said in my chat? I want to know You're not her type. You're not short short, but handsome Let's see It is ever written also like wait, wait, hold on. You know what if if Sina likes Ludwig She probably likes Twink's so she you're definitely that was not a twink. I mean, he's twink ish in 2020 He's a jock, right? I mean, what is he? He was not, he was never, he's never been like tiny. Well, no, oh yeah, you're right, twunkish.

No, she didn't type until last year in your chat. Damn. She sent one smiley face in 2021. Yeah. Has she said I'm hot or anything? No, I'm sorry. Wait, what about my chat? Austin, no one goes to your chat.

I wouldn't want that anyway. Excuse you. I could see, I could see. Sorry, wait, what about my chat? That's awesome. No one goes to your I could see I could see maybe maybe Ludwig was on your stream and she I discovered Ludwig. No you did You're so annoying. I did I discovered Ludwig had his first big shot on my show Yeah, because of me that was his breakthrough moment. I don't know if it was it was six Breakthrough moment on my show. Oh, I just banned her on accident. Oh shit in my I'm gonna keep it that way In my chat. Yeah In 2021 she said Austin is using his cam today. Yes, Queen Okay

I'm keeping her band I'm like, hey, you look so handsome today. I'm keeping her band. Okay. That's crazy. Let her come to me for the appeal. You'll see, Sin, I've got a lot of power here. All you had to do, hmm, I don't know. You're gonna get a bunch of collabs out of this.

You're gonna make her do a bunch of stuff. Oh yeah, oh yeah. For every message that I find inappropriate, she asks, so she owes me. You think you can kick her ass? That little bitch. Yes, she's a foot shorter than me. Damn.

I don't know, she's... She's a foot shorter than me. You know what? I don't know why I feel like she got hands. I'm sure she's got hands. But who knows? But she's kind, she has a kind heart. She's feisty.

Yeah, she has a kind heart. But okay, I did do, listen, for any purists, it is a Sunday, swig is closed, It is a Sunday swig is closed thirst is closed so delicious is closed these all sound like gay bars Swig and thirst no They're not gay bars. They are soda shops. Yes Interesting swig which is opposite of a gay bar. It's the diametrical opposite of a gay bar. Okay, I'd like to make it very clear. Some people get confused by this.

The words of wisdom state you should not have coffee or tea. Words of wisdom, I believe, were sent out by Gordon B. Hinckley and it was just some things to live by. Okay, Gordon B. Hinckley was the president of the church in 2000 and something. So it's not just caffeine, it's coffee. Hot coffee. Well, it's coffee. Hot coffee. Well, coffee. Coffee. First it was hot drinks.

You can have caffeine, but now it's just no... No coffee, no tea. Mormons were very anti-Chinese. They were like, no hot drinks. But you can have hot chocolate. Okay, like, look, look, look. Can I be real? Yeah.

Look, and no disrespect to Brigham Young and Joseph Smith. That's Joseph, that's Big Joe. All disrespect, Brigham Young was a slaver. Okay, you know what, all the disrespect, you're right, you're right. Disrespect. Okay. All the disrespect to Brigham Young, that piece of shit. You're gonna get haunted.

I did think, I was like, this is a little ghoulishlish but Brigham Young's grave is like over there I did think about we should record it as great. No, no, no, it's like Four blocks that way five blocks. Well, let me tell you something all the other religions There is a little bit of believe like I could see how okay, you know what I mean? I kind of believe a little bit but the Mormons like some of the shit is like damn Reaching for like the caffeine and the... Well, it's to keep you healthy. And the Zion and like, it looks like a fucking Star Trek movie.

It's crazy. Like, I don't understand, like, it's so... I'm doing a really bad job at converting members. No, it's like, it's so... My baptism count is zero. Oh my God, this is, like, how do you believe it? I don't understand. Well, it's called faith, like how do you believe it? I don't understand. Well, it's called faith, and if you doubt it,

that's actually your problem. Okay. And it's bad. And we will judge you and excommunicate you. And people that doubt God. So let me get this straight. Smaller heaven. So I gotta believe it unconditionally.

Yes, absolutely. The moment I question it, I'm going to hell. Yes. Also, also, you gotta believe it unflinchingly, but also, like, you have loopholes. Okay, what are the loopholes? Well, you can have hot chocolate, but you can't have hot coffee,

and you can't have caffeinated hot tea. The only tea that's kind of kosher was spearmint tea. Kosher, like kosher? Yeah, not like actually kosher, but that's just. That's okay. Yeah. I like that. Me and a that's just... That's okay. Yeah. I like that. Me and a friend of mine, Felix Biederman of Chappachapah,

shout us out, have talked about this quite a bit. He believes, he's Jewish, he believes that Mormonism is the closest to Judaism out of like, you know, the Christian sub-sex. Huh. I don't know enough about Judaism. With its, no, not even like because of its rules But more so about like the rule abiding rule breaking nature of Mormonism

Oh, yeah, like consistently trying to find loopholes like because on Saturdays You're not supposed to work if you're Orthodox Jew, right? And because of that there's a loophole Sunday's you're not supposed to work. It's called the Shavas goi. Okay, so They will hire like Orthodox Jewish people will hire a Gentile person, non-Jewish person, to basically turn on the TV, turn it off, turn on the lights, turn it off. Yeah. What?

Or, yeah, it's called the Shavas Goy. And the elevators of like Cedar Sinai and other Jewish hospitals actually will always stop at every floor on Saturdays so they don't have to press a button. But I have a very similar- I didn't know that. What if you're trying to get to the birth of your child? Well, sorry, you're just gonna have to stop at every, you know, on the elevator. Is that really- There's also a string that surrounds Manhattan, but I'm not gonna get into that.

But there is, there's, we were on the car ride over here, the driver was explaining to us how the owner of the Utah Jazz during the playoffs, when one of the games was on Sunday, actually was not, like, he didn't go in to the stadium. Yeah. Because it's work, technically. Yeah.

So he just sat outside the stadium you also you're not supposed to Like you shouldn't like you can't go to the movies on Sunday because you can't spend money on Sunday What yeah, you're not supposed to spend money on Sunday. You're not supposed to hang out with your friends It's only family on Sunday. Okay. What if like what if like you forgot to buy you have to eat You need to prepare before then you should buy groceries. You're not supposed to spend money. And if I buy food I'm going to hell. Well no, but you should like, you know, repent. Okay, repent. Is there like, where do I go to repent?

You can just pray. Unless it's really bad then you have to go to your bishop. Oh I have to go to my bishop. Yeah, if it's like, if you like cheated on your wife. Wait, can I? Wait. If you like gambled you'd have to go to your bishop. You know what I would like to do? I'd like to join the Mormon church. In like a random town nobody would know who I am. I, I just blend in I go to church for like four months

Okay, and then I would just talk to my bishop and just confess the most heinous gay Why what will you get from it's a kink? He's just describing a kink. Yeah, what all right? Can we get okay? Yes So have you guys been sleeping? I'm not well will the world's on fire. I can't sleep at all will I know? I know both of you are warriors. That's why I'm excited to talk to you guys about beams green powder a science-backed healthy nighttime blend For sleep that is actually clinically shown to improve sleep and have you waken up Refreshed I would love for us to be refreshed. He looks tired. He does I am exhausted and thank you wakin' up refreshed? I would love for Austin to be refreshed. He looks tired. He does.

I am exhausted and thank you for noticing. You show it. Thank you, thank you so much. That's the nicest thing. No, it's the nicest thing anybody ever said to me. And I feel like it shows that I have room to grow and I'm gonna do that by doing this. Beam sleep power.

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That's B-E-A-M.com slash fear and use code fear at checkout for 40% off. So because of the restrictions of the Mormon religion, the Mormons, of course, their endless loopholes are found that- There are more soda shops in Salt Lake City than there are Starbucks. Really?

Mm-hmm. Really, cause all the caffeine. Yeah, cause this is allowed. This is why we were talking about how like Mormons have- Oh my God, that's so big. It's my fur coat, it's my fur coat. This is a small. Shut up. That's not a small. This is why we were talking about how like Mormons have, oh my God, that's so big. It's my fur coat, it's my fur coat. This is a small. What, shut up.

That's not a small. This is a small. That's not a small on any planet. No way. This is the small, I ordered the small. No way. What's the big? I don't know, I didn't get the big, I got the small.

I wanna know how physically, like how large can a container get? Is there sugar in this? Yes, Austin. Okay, this one, this one is called the Beehive. It's pink lemonade, coconut cream, and pineapple. Oh, that sounds spectacular. It tastes like a snow cone.

Oh, you won't use our straw? That tastes like a non-alcoholic alcoholic beverage. Now I used our straw. Like a pina colada. But you love it. It tastes like that. Yeah, he loves it. He's making that face, but he loves it. I was not mixed I was you can put it down, but I also don't like

Super into it it literally tastes lemons Okay, it tastes like a like a like a pina colada, but without the alcohol Yeah, yeah, I agree not bad Why don't we just have all three of us have our own individual straws and then we can stab it. That'd be really smart. Well, Austin, that's your straw now. Okay. Wait, but y'all touched it.

You used it last. Okay. This one is called the Boy Scout. It's disgusting. It's root beer, vanilla cream, Oh good chocolate. Oh English toffee. Oh and toasted marshmallow. Wait actually kind of sounds good. That sounds I'm ready for it. That sounds like what's the diabetes rate

in Utah? I don't know. Well because y'all can't like here is a Mormon like you can't work on a Sunday. There's so many rules. One thing there's little restrictions to is like you can eat whatever you want. So the food here is really good. It tastes like a tootsie roll. Oh, I hate tootsie rolls. It tastes like a tootsie roll in liquid form. I've never had something like that before. I've never had something like that before. Oh that is painful. Oh that's disgusting. That's truly heinous. Yeah yeah. Oh oh wow it tastes like sweet motor oil. You're right. I got the top three most popular ones that's what I ordered, okay This experience is and then last but not least we got the Jedi

Okay, which is a Dr. Pepper diet Dr. Pepper Vanilla cream the fuck's the Diet Dr. Pepper, vanilla cream. Wait, regular and diet together? Hey, that's crazy. Don't ask me. I don't know. Okay.

Dr. Pepper, Diet Dr. Pepper, vanilla cream, caramel and cherry. Aw. Oh my God. Mormons are amazing. Yippee. So this isn't a sin? No.

Well, technically the purchase as a Mormon, the purchase of it is a sin because you did purchase on a Sunday. That's scary. Making that face. I don't know what it tastes like. Yeah, you made the face of a person who's who's just encountered a new substance. I can't I can't describe it. It's weird because there's cherry in there, but it almost tastes just like butterscotch. I will admit this is the least offensive.

Let me see. Yeah. Let me test it out here. I also think after that root beer one was so like incredibly sweet. Austin likes all of them. That's like cool as it is, All of them are on my side now. Drink whatever one you want.

So I learned something yesterday. Wait, overall, how was your soda pop experience? You know, I think most of them really sucked. Wow. But, and they just, they, too many calories. My god, that's like at least 300 calories each drink. 300? Yeah. I think more than that.

There's cream in them. Yeah, it's too much. I don't know why. Is there a lot of overweight people here? I don't know. How do I find that out? Not really. I haven't seen that many people living here.

Lots of people walk here. It's really walky. So I think they're probably heart disease is high, but they walk a lot. it's really walkie. So I don't, I think they're probably heart disease is high, but they walk a lot. Yeah. Yeah, interesting. The silent killer, you can be skinny and still have heart disease.

That's right, which is what Cutie and I are always acutely aware of, which is why we always get an echocardiogram and we have heart monitors. Yeah. That's good. Yeah. What were you saying, though?

I was saying I discovered something, and I know, so as I said, I went to the gay bar last night, and I was looking around, and I was talking to this guy, and I was like, you know, I don't mean to be, no, this isn't offensive, but there's a lot of women here. Oh, there are a lot of women at the gay bar? Yeah, which obviously, like, women can be gay, too. But like, a lot of straight women were at the gay bar. Yeah, which obviously like women can be gay too, but like a lot of straight women were at the gay bar.

Oh, you can tell? I mean, I mean, look, look. Yes. I can tell. What does a gay woman look like, Austin? Look, there are some women that don't, look, I'm not saying there is a look to gay, but. Sounds like you are.

I think there's something very funny about a Portland gay who is like the most midwestern gay and doesn't look gay at all Going to Utah to be like none of these queers look gay to me So look, there were some, well no, cuz like you know usually you see a woman and usually it's just like it didn't look gay There's a lot of women that didn't look gay Austin, you don't look gay I did a lot of women that didn't look awesome you don't I know what Look what I'm saying is you think maybe that they're gay. Okay, just don't look the part two things here Okay, number one. There's usually not a lot of women in a gay bar typically a fair or not. Okay. Yeah number two There was a high

Percentage of women that didn't look gay. so I just assumed maybe they were straight. I don't know, maybe I was wrong. So I'm like, I hope this isn't offensive, there's just a lot of women here that are straight. And he's like, no, no, no, it's not. It's actually a thing. And I'm like, what do you mean? He's like, all these straight women come to the gay bars,

they're LDS straight women come to the gay bars to escape the men from all of the straight bars in Salt Lake City. So like they just come without their gay friends and they just come to the gay bar. But they're not LDS. That's what he said. He said they're LDS women. No. No. He was lying. Mormons can't, you're not supposed to go to a bar. Oh. There are a lot of bars out here I mean, I think I think it could just be like women like it could just be women But I don't think it was Mormon women specifically regardless. I had a great time, okay Yeah, it sounded fun an awesome time, and I'm so sorry to you. No no it's like

I don't think I would have had a good time, but I think I'm I'm so sad okay I don't think I would have had a good time, but I think I would have been glad. Oh my god. I am so sad. I might have gotten drunk with you. You could have been a straight woman at the gay bar. A straight woman. A straight woman. That's why he saw a bunch of ladies and was like, damn, we don't need any more of her. He was like, I don't want any more women.

Get these women out of here. Let me make it up to you, cutie. Next time I go to a gay bar. I don't want to go. I was only in the mood last night. You lost your opportunity. Once in a blue moon type shit. Okay, this is what I was afraid of is that what if I invite you and you take too long and I want to go home and then you show up? You know what I mean? Then I'll be alone. Now the truth comes out.

No, no, but like the thing- I can be alone. There was a lot of pressure. There was a lot of factors at play. I wasn't sure how committed I was to going out. So if I would have gotten there and not had a good time now I ended up staying till the bar shut down But you had so many hours to tell me you called me at 10 p.m. The bars close at 1 it was actually this one Closed it to you. I don't know how it happened, but we were still there. We were there till 2, but yeah great time I met a couple they were former LDS. I love former Mormons. It's so cool to learn about it Yeah, it must be it would be cool if you had

anyone you could talk to. But look it won't happen again. We've never met the former Mormon. I'm gonna actually go by myself to the gay bars tonight. Let's go tonight. I'm not going with you. I'm going alone. I mean it is Sunday. Do you think they'll be popping on a Sunday night? I don't know. I didn't even know there were gay bars in South Dakota., there's several. There's a lot of gay people here. Yeah, I mean, that does make sense. There's more of a rebellion here. I know people from Utah, and what they've told me about Salt Lake City is that it's either half Mormon and half addicts. Gay.

Oh, okay. There's a lot of like, former Mormons, there's a lot of rehab facilities here apparently. Yeah. So it's like- It's the highest opioid addiction because of all the sad housewives. Wow. Interesting. Yeah.

Wow. I totally get it. If I lived here, I would develop a crippling heroin addiction for sure. It's also the highest botox and plastic surgery because isn't that surprising? But I think it's keeping up with the Joneses. It's like- There's a lot of pressure Yeah, Mormon communities like I like when I talked to this woman on the plane Yesterday I told kitty about this what's awesome. I was talking to this woman on a plane and she was definitely Mormon

Because we were going to Utah and she had 15 grandchildren So I was pretty much, you know, it's pretty a sure shot. And she got to the question, she was like, so are you seeing anybody? And I have never ran faster back into the closet. I was like... To women, I love him so much. No, no, you know what I said word for word? I said, you know, I'm just focused,

I'm so career focused right now, and I just don't have time for a special lady in my life. She call you the F slur in her mind No, no, I said I just don't have time for this Frickin Homo. I think I think I bled it in great Surely you didn't have to I mean yeah But anyway, I did that because I was because I what I'm trying to say is I felt the judgment was so strong. Yeah. Like she was, I was getting, like that must be the pressure, that's why people are getting so much plastic surgery.

Yeah, yeah, there's a lot of judgment. There's a ton of it. Yeah. But you know there's a lot of, there's a lot of, there's, Mormons do a lot of kind things. Yeah, I think they do, they do a lot of good. They're very nice. Yeah, very nice. The best neighbor is a Mormon neighbor. Right that's right. They'll bring you casseroles, they'll bring it. It's it's one thing I really like um I really like about this place is just everyone's kind. Yeah they're

good people. Yeah. I needed a iPhone charger. I needed an iPhone charger and the guy next to me got up out of his seat, went into the overhead, took it out. Turns out it's for, he has a new iPhone, I have an old one. It didn't work and he was apologizing to me. I was like, man, I'm so sorry. I'm the one who should be apologizing. What is going on? That's so funny.

But yeah, it was cool. Cool experience. Yeah, traffic lights here, like stop sign, four way stop sign. This is the biggest problem is everyone's going like, no you go, no you go, no you go. Yeah. No you go. Yeah. QT, I've noticed that you no you go, no you go. Yeah.

Cutie, I've noticed that you are feeling a lot less mentally ill. Yeah. And a lot happier. I hate LA. Wait, you rejoined the church. Should I? Yes.

Austin, we came here to bring her back. No, I know, but there's Mormon churches. What are you doing? There's Mormon churches in LA. It's not gonna help. No, I found my new home. I'm gonna get a cabin. Cutie, maybe they were right. The get a cabin. Maybe they were right.

The church? Yeah, maybe they were right. Yeah, maybe. You're so calm and cool and collected. I just like it here. I like it. You're still late, but like you were. It's nice.

I had my reasons. I'm thinking of like different ways of trying to get you to not like this place, but I feel like everything that I would bring up as a negative, you see as a positive. Like, it's too quiet, there's nothing going on. I love it. I love it so much.

It's so gray. You know how often my citizen app goes off here? It's gone off one time for a protest on President's Day. That's it. Were they protesting for more? No, they were protesting against Trump. They were like, please, please, Mr mr. Trump do more of what you're doing I do feel like hitting I know there's a lot here

It's like so chill. There's like it's such a lack of crime. There's definitely crime here. You think it does help that? It's cold. No one wants to cry when it's cold Well, like I feel like there's like a huge I'm not saying people should come here and commit crime But there seems to be very like you're saying it Yeah, I'm just saying like there's a lot of crime going on in LA like maybe well you know what if you're a criminal you probably go to where there's a lot of crime okay Los Angeles is ginormous yeah yeah it is a massive metropolitan city Salt Lake City although has grown quite a bit is nowhere near as large mm-hmm so that I think probably is one of the major reasons having said that there's also a shit ton of crime

That happens here. Just like it happens in a lot of Yeah, you just don't see it that's what I was gonna say like like there's this notion that people think like there's literally dudes Doing heroin back there. You know what? I didn't even perceive that that's so funny funny. Are you sure that they're doing heroin? Well, they were doing Whippets at the time. How do you know? Because I saw them. Were they laughing?

No, I saw them with the canisters. Oh, I mean they're just. When I was walking back. They're just making a frappuccino. Yeah, they're just using whipped cream. Yeah, they were whipping it all right. Which, I mean, I'm used to it. I'll be honest.

But we saw that and I was kinda nervous about filming here but then I saw that and I was like, oh, we're good. Yeah. You know what I mean, I'm used to it. I'll be honest. But we saw that and I was kind of nervous about filming here. But then I saw that I was like, oh, we're good. Yeah. You know what I mean? Are you cold? I'm getting a little chilly. You're starting to shake. Yeah, I had to put the gloves on.

I'm glad. Do you want a beanie? No, no, no, it's okay. I have a beanie. Do you have a jacket? I'll be, there's a big, Hassan brought an extra jacket for me. How many minutes are we in?

That's crazy that you didn't bring a jacket. 52. Okay, perfect. Yeah, no, I didn't bring a jacket because it was kind of warm out here, but that's because I was moving around, you know. Okay. I think it's gonna snow. No, I don't think it's gonna snow. Like right now? No, no, no, but tonight. Wait, really? It looks like it. It looks like it. Wait, you just look at the sky and you can tell? That's kind of a bummer. I wish it snowed. No, it's not. It's not cold enough.

It's 48 degrees out right now. I know but it snows at 32 That's about 12 degrees. Yeah, but look at the sky 14. Does it feel like snow sky? Yeah, it's snow sky He heard a noise there was a car with the with one of those like annoying When they'd like bust out the exhaust or whatever and and it goes, like it makes gunshot noises. And Austin turned to me and he was like, is it weird that I just didn't even think that that was gunshots, but in LA I would think it was gunshots.

I did say that, but it's because there's more likely in LA to be a gunshot, right? Yeah. I feel like this- It is harder to get a gun in LA. Yeah, Utah probably has a higher- You can go to Walmart probably. Yeah, there's way more guns here.

There's just more responsible gun owners here. Yeah, yeah, exactly, of course. No, no, no, I mean, I can look it up, but- We're also, we're on the good side of the train tracks. There's a bad Salt Lake City? Yeah, there's a bad, yeah. In any city, there's gonna be a bad area. Damn.

Yeah, of course there is. No, I think that's, that's you love this place This is like this is just like it even know boring version of where you live No, I when I got here. I realized man. I'm actually not so white He did say that I did you know like I'm like man. I really am Lebanese You know I got off the plane I like, I look like I'm different. Oh, okay. You know?

There are so many white people. For the first time in your life, you're like, am I a DEI? Yeah. I looked around, I was like, damn, they make me look. They're laughing back there at your scenes. They're laughing at me? Yes. Y'all know I look like Lebanese.

No, I look white. Yeah. Oh yeah, scooters was on my plane. Yeah. Yeah, yesterday. I'm was on my plane. Yeah yesterday I I'm a city boy through and through like Los Angeles doesn't have a lot of city qualities And I am always annoyed by that but like what do you mean by city qualities like public transportation and train? This has a great they have a train that goes everywhere

But what I was yeah, I did see the tram thing that yeah, the tram square or whatever It's called tracks and it goes this way. And then there's this thing called front runner that goes super fast all the way up, mountain to mountain. Wow. Well, what I was going to say is, I mean, this is a particularly boring, I mean, particularly boring city. It seems great.

I love it. Yeah. It's nice and calm. It is very depressing. Wow. I'm downtown, like in the center. I love it. Yeah, it's nice and calm. It is very depressing Wow I would I'm downtown like in the center you Your life at the gay club my hope yeah, that's fucking down. That's a city center. Yeah, that is Smack dab in the city's okay that downtown on ironically is like isically, is like... Is this a major city? What I...

I don't know. Salt Lake City, yeah, technically. I mean, it's a small city. I had an Afghan Uber driver who was explaining, because I was like, how the fuck did you get here? Like, why are you here? You can't just ask people how they got here. No, I literally did.

I was like, because I know when you give refugee status, they ask you which... They ask you, they don't give you exactly which city you want to go to, but they give you placements. And they ask them, do you want to go to but they give you like, you know placements and They asked them like do you want to go to a big city or a small city? And he was like, oh small city so They sent him to Salt Lake City, which I thought was very interesting because he's like, you know, he's from Afghanistan Now lives in Salt Lake City

But yeah, this was this is definitely a smaller on the smaller side of cities, I think. Yeah, I mean, I think Portland's bigger. I don't know. Yeah, Portland's more bustling than Salt Lake City for sure. You can't just, it's just more chill here. It's definitely chill. It's chill vibes.

Maybe I'll come on a weekday. Why? Because it's maybe more bustling. No, a weekday wouldn't be more, it's chill vibes. Maybe I'll come on a weekday. Why? Because it's maybe more bustling. No, a weekday wouldn't be more, it's chill. It's just a chill, it's a chill vibe. I will say, they are really nice. Yeah, everyone's nice. Like I complained about my hotel room. Uh-huh.

And they put me in like a suite. Well, you did that on purpose. No, no, what do you mean? Like I didn't ask for the suite. Right, of course. I went down, they put me in a hotel room. Okay, look. I didn't complain.

Dude, the population of Salt Lake City, of course. I went down. They put me in a hotel room. I didn't complain. Dude, the population of Salt Lake City as of 2024 is 194,000. The Salt Lake City metropolitan statistical area is 1.2 million in 2020. What? Yeah. I thought Salt Lake City was much bigger than that. The Salt Lake City- Portland is much bigger than that.

I don't know what any of this means. The Salt Lake City Ogden Provo combined statistical area population is 2.7 million. That is like... That's Portland. That's insanely small. Which is what makes sense. The airport is so big though. It's an international airport isn't it? Yeah, so it's Portland. The airport is big. There's a lot of travelers. It's just a connection airport. But also I think people come in to ski, right? Yeah. There's a lot of skiing. I'm going skiing tomorrow.

Oh yeah. I'm learning for the first time ever. I'm proud of you. Yeah, it's going to be great. The thing I was going to say is the downtown feels like what I assume like in the old Western movies, there's one big road and then like saloons on the side Mm-hmm. That's literally what their big downtown feels like but you know, they're modern buildings

the roads are so wide here because they made them wide enough for like a Carriage to do a u-turn like an ox pulled carriage To do a u-turn. So that's why all the roads are so wide here. Yeah, the city is very efficient. Yeah, and it's on a grid. I've already, I can find everything, it's nice. They're building a lot of buildings. There's not much.

They have the classic, what is it, five plus one, I think that's what they're called, like these ugly ass buildings. Yeah, there's a lot of these here. There's so many of them everywhere. They're kind of weird. What's the rent like here? Do you know?

I don't know. I have no clue. Well, we'll look it up again. I guess we could Google it. Time to look it up again. What's the difference? What's rent for a small, like what's rent for a one bedroom apartment in LA?

It's $4,500. No. In West Hollywood? No. Wait, what? That's what I was looking, that's what it was? You were looking at real fancy. It was probably like two to three grand

Under-tour one better Somebody that's looked recently just told us 2,500 for one Salt Lake City rent Prices Okay, okay Average rent in Salt Lake City rent price is one $1,600 is the average rent in Salt Lake City, Utah. It's not much cheaper than LA. That's almost half the price.

Oh, it is a thousand. Jesus Christ, hold on. Sorry, bad math. Yeah. Yeah, and 46% of units that are available are in the 1000 the $1,500 price range and then 32 percent of the units available are in the 1500 to $2,000 price range so it is remarkably cheap it was much cheaper than Los Angeles which is saying all everyone should just come here I'm not

fun we'd have so much fun. Let's start a streaming hub in Salt Lake City. Yeah. I'll go anywhere. We just have to get soda poppin'. It was no problem for me to come out. People seem to follow Soda Poppin'. Yeah, yeah. I had no problem coming out here.

Do you regret your decision? We're having a good ass time. No, because, yeah, we're having a great time. I mean, I'm cold and yeah, I pulled an Austin. I'm like literally flying day in and out just to shoot a podcast. By the way, you could not survive my lifestyle. Yeah, because I'm not crazy.

I would have just moved to Los Angeles. The fuck do you mean? Yeah, no one, flying every week is insane, Austin. Yeah. We all think that. Imagine what you dealt with today as every week. No, I mean, that's because I, even though I finally got my global entry,

I didn't put it in. Oh. Like, I wasn't able to put it into my, when I was getting my ticket. And then Austin claimed he could do it for me. And then he ended up just checking me in on the phone. I messed up. Yeah.

So he's gonna have to go through the regular security. I hope that, you know, the Salt Lake Airport isn't too congested. It did look horrible. The departures look terrible. Yeah, how would you fucking know? I don't know. I drove here. How would you know? I've flown here a few times. The reason I reason I we haven't slow the reason here my teen years ago I know this was a one-horse town My my uncle died and so that's why I'm out here Yeah, that's the worst part about this story by the way Yeah, which is that I can't even fucking get mad at her for not being on the podcast for like eight weeks now

Yeah, because I want to I want to be like what the fuck are you doing cutie? But like yeah, she she had a my uncle died Fear is after a fear and episode when we all went to dinner You didn't come me and Austin and will and Marsh Marsh came yeah. Yeah, yeah, oh No, no, no, it was late. It was late in the night. It was 10 p.m.. Yeah, well myself Yeah, and cutie, and I get a phone call No, so like she gets a phone call in the middle of dinner. Yeah, and cutie and I get a phone call at 10 p.m. No, so like she gets a phone call in the middle of dinner Yeah, and you came back and it was just like so we just didn't know I didn't know

Yeah, so I have a lot of extended family out here. So since I did kind of a loop-de-loop I went up to Washington. I've gone through Idaho I went to Colorado for a little bit and I've now I have an Airbnb here and I'm just spending time with extended family and Like long lost friends. Yeah, when are you well? I'm my plan was come the first week of March, but fun news is our house might be full of black mold That we find out tomorrow. Okay. Okay. Okay, regardless. Uh-huh. You're coming back though, right? I'll come back at some point. Yeah But I have to not be in the black mold. Anyway, girly combination, this has been great.

We're gonna go to a Patreon episode right now. Yes, and you can find out more where I publicly kill myself in front of the Joseph Smith sphinx statue here in Salt Lake City, Utah. Go to patreon.com slash fear and for more. Peace. Holy to patreon.com slash fear and for more. Peace. Holy fucking shit.

My options at this point is to shit myself in the car or to pull off the side five feet away from people because it's like car and then like bushes and just try to shit in the bushes. So I veer off to the side. I get out of my car, I run, I open the side door and I just shit on the side to the side. I get out of my car. I run. I open the side door, and I just shit on the side of the road. It was my only option.

Wait. You shot in the wild? Yes. Like straight booty cheeks looking into the moonlight. What you don't understand is also the highway is elevated. So everyone on the highway that stands still can just see me. It wasn't moonlight. It was middle of day.

It was like 1 p.m. Oh, my God.