Fear& - We Spent a Day With Anthony Padilla.. | Fear& A Day

Episode Date: January 16, 2023

This week one of the first viral youtube content creators, Anthony Padilla, joins us. Damn we’re really just getting every og youtube legend on the show these days arent we? Comment below which 2005 internet celebrity we should have on next, must 30 or older to enter. Terms and conditions apply. Idk what im saying anymore man we filmed this one less than 24hrs ago and im writing this on my phone in bed at 3:13am im sleepy as hell just watch the episode. Also not to shill but the patreon episode on this one is a banger its like 30 minutes longer than the main episode and wholesome af. 🎉BONUS CONTENT🍾 🌟PATREON - https://www.patreon.com/FearAnd🎧 AUDIO PLATFORMS - https://linktr.ee/fearand♥ follow our guest! ♥Anthony: https://twitter.com/anthonypadilla✰ follow the boys! ✰Hasan: https://twitter.com/HasanthehunWill: https://twitter.com/TheWillNeffMarche: https://twitter.com/MarcheFear&: https://twitter.com/FearAndPod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Please gamble responsibly. Gambling problem? For free assistance, call the Connex Ontario helpline at 1-866-531-2600. Bet MGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. it's all good like weirdly placed today i don't know what is going on should i fall apart should i yeah the entire the entire podcast is over I think Janky is one word I would describe Yeah No no it's fine

I'm happy with this I guess You know Fuck it Fuck me It's fine It's just You know

Dude you're so Unhappy with it We can just move it Why does your shoes Say think happy thoughts on it Man these are the Shack Why does your necklace

Say fish Oh it's my It's my dog that passed away. Oh, fuck. My bad. All right. Jam bands, too. I was trying to say I

was trying to deter the conversation. Yeah, he just got back from Red Rocks. He's been a big fish head. H. Isn't that isn't that

how you say fish with the pH? Yeah, it's fish. Yeah. I fucking hate. Oh, you're a fish. I'm not a... Oh, you're a pish? I'm not a jam band guy at all. If you... I bet if I...

If I put you on the right drugs, I bet I could get you into a solid jam band session. I've been to... I've been to a Grateful Dead concert one time. Huh? None of them are alive anymore, are there? Was there a cover band? No.

No, Bob Weir. And they still tour. I did not know that. They still tour. They tour with, they tour John Mayer. They were doing it for a while. Yeah, that's, I mean. I'll take you to some real jam band shit.

Stream cheese. The Deadheads are fucking coming after you No they won't We have a big audience of Deadheads They won't come after me Because they know after Garcia died So went the band too Okay

I agree That's my contribution Yeah this is the jankiest Welcome to the jankiest podcast God that's a good name The jankiest podcast Yeah the jankiest You. God, that's a good name. The Jankiest Podcast. Yeah, the Janky. You guys fucked up.

You're in what? The Hanky Panky. All right. This is our producer, March, on the ones and twos over here. Fucking. You give me five minutes to set up. It's in frame. The other camera.

Okay. I think this is good. all right crossing he's the fastest producer in the world damn you got that set up in three seconds yeah we've done this so many times so he's just he's quick with it he's nice with it all right uh like i said welcome to the janky podcast uh is anthony padilla in the building That's right. We are spending a day with Anthony Padilla. Let's be honest. It's only going to be an hour and 20 minutes. Am I allowed to say?

Okay. Technically, that's what you do as well. Hey, shut the fuck up. Okay? We don't talk about that. I know. He's not the DMCA striker shit, dude. I'm going to take you down.

Dude, that jacket is so sick. I just want to get started on that. Thank you. What's going on there? I have no idea. It looks like someone straight up took sandpaper to it, and I'm so into it. It looks dope. It looks like a costume.

Yeah, I kind of like that, right? You look like you just came right out of slaying Ludwig in Bloodborne. Yeah, that's what I was going to say. I kind of feel a little colonial. Yeah. But not the fucked up kind. Yeah, yeah. I like the imperial kind.

The cool kind. Like the cool kind. The cool colonial kind. Yeah. I was like, as a matter of fact, sir, not the fucked up kind. Yeah, yeah. Not like the imperialist kind. Like the cool kind. The cool colonial kind where it's like, as a matter of fact, sir, we should not do this. That's what you were saying. Yeah.

We should not do this podcast. Is that? No, no, no. More like slavery. Very bad. Oh, yeah. About that stuff. Yeah.

I might be in the minority, but slavery is bad. Yeah. That kind. I would peg you as that. You would just, I don't know about that clip. You just said you would peg me and it just really took me out. Yeah, I'm sorry.

There's going to be sexual innuendos throughout. So that was intended. That was intentional. We were trying to get some TikTok clips. Let's blast through our bumbling here for a second. I kind of wasted all the good conversation before the podcast. Well, we did we already talked about it just do it again and i will not say any of that stuff again so i'm gonna

ask you a question oh god what is the first video of his you ever saw oh that's actually a good question uh it was like i spent a day from his i spent a day that. That's crazy, you Turkish fuck. I never watched, you did Smosh, right? Yeah. Never watched that, did not know anything about it, was like, that part of YouTube, I just- You did Smosh, right? Yeah, not even remotely interested in any of that. Tell us on, you're the day in the life guy.

No, I mean, to a lot of people, that's the case. So let me, let me open a conversation. Go ahead. You're red, right? You're bright red with, with elation.

That's like, that's like someone to Peyton Manning being like, I remember you from football commentary. You played once before then, right? Like, well, okay.

Now you're making it seem like his career is over doing. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, right? Like, well. Okay, now you're making it seem like his career is over doing things. No, no, no, no, no, no. That's not. Okay, let me shift the focus of the conversation. A 15-year-old Will at one point watched a video that is kind of, I would say, legendary on the internet in the hollows of like Charlielie bit me type internet fame okay i

know charlie bit me but you're not but he's not the charlie i'm not the charlie he was in the car he was driving yeah yeah no um so he uh and his partner made a video where they lip sync along to the pokemon theme and i was telling him you have to watch this at a 15 year old will neff this was a life changing experience. It got taken down? For copyright infringement, yeah. Let's see, so we uploaded that in November 2005 and I think it was June,

maybe a little bit earlier, 2007. Brother, I was in Turkey back then. Yeah, what were you doing? Like what? I was playing Dota. No, but I was saying that that video is kind of pivotal in a lot of young creators' lives, a lot of YouTubers' lives.

I mean, I can only speak for myself, but I'm assuming. Because that video was the first time, I was probably 14 years old, I saw this video and I was like, holy shit. You can just make stuff and put it on YouTube and become famous yeah what was it about because it was so crudely made i think that was it was it that it was like it was crude but it was like two friends having a great time yeah and it went ballistic yeah we went crazy it went ballistic

how many views uh it had 25 million before it was removed for copyright infringement. And at that time, actually, it went down. You got to pull it up. It was the number one most viewed video on YouTube at the time for a while. Hassan has no idea what we're talking about. He was in Turkey. Yeah, what were you doing in 2005, 2006? I was literally in high school.

There it is. I was in high school. There it is. I was in high school in Turkey. No, there it is. Okay. Yeah, I can't see. No, no, he's going to pull it up. Yeah, yeah.

Wow, dude. You know what's crazy? In this video, you look like Marsh. Yeah, yeah. Okay, just like play it on mute. Let's see. No, just play it and mute it after. Because this makes no sense whatsoever.

No, no, no, just play it on mute. Because we don't want to get the video taken down. You can just mute. Okay. No, we can't. Because we're doing commentary over it. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Okay, first of all. If you don't know the Pokemon song, this is. Oh, my God. Wait, at first I was like, which one are you? Yeah, I was like you can you even tell which one i am you're the one with the insane hair which isn't really narrowing it down here yeah not you're the one with oh what the fuck that was it was a look a mistake is that what you just said no no no no plus if you say it about me you're saying it about Marge right now you gotta you gotta take it you gotta take it

in the context man in 2005 that went hard it went so hard yeah lip syncing videos were really popular at the time

but we just threw in so many insane things good thing that changed a lot since 2005 that is literally yeah musically TikTok essentially

is where YouTube was yeah or it feels like it. Yeah. It was a place where, like, everyone could have their 15 minutes of fame. It was literally called, I mean, YouTube broadcast yourself was the tagline. Yeah. Yeah.

Man, this fucking platform. It's insane. We're the old dogs. Like, I mean, I was on the Young Turks, and obviously you are, like, one of the institutions of YouTube, like, originally. I mean, for people who don't understand it, this is stuff I learned after the fact. But you were basically Smosh was, like, PewDiePie.

Like, it was to that level, or what MrBeast is now. You were that before PewDiePie and before MrBeast. Yeah, we handed the crown to PewDiePie and before Mr. Beast yeah we handed the crown to PewDiePie we made a video when he became the number one most subscribed YouTube channel yeah I mean this little video about I do want to add a caveat though you were doing it with a lot of sketch yeah which I think is more difficult I mean I hate to I hate to rate difficulties but I think reality TV shows and kind of like competition shows on youtube are much more base and turning out a sketch that has that kind of appeal was always very impressive

yes difficult in another way yeah yeah of course it is because you can't always make everyone laugh like snl has awful seasons yeah we're living in it right now. And it's like, and, and, uh, in order to be able to like reach the broadest audience possible with sketch comedy is profoundly difficult. Yep. Rather than being like a influencer that everyone, uh, you know,

likes the personality of or whatever. Yeah. I just want to say, I want to finish this thought before we move on. That video inspired me to start making YouTube crap. And I made a video in my high school about a fictional porn website called naughty nef.com and i would do weird things like hang upside down from my bunk bed and stuff like that and then i would crop in videos that i would take of my teachers using the computer

when they'd be like who's on this site and it would just cut to like a back view of like my physics teacher on the computer. And it went crazy among my high school friends. But that was, that was the beginning for me was naughty. Neff.com. That sounds really hot. My,

my interest in, uh, making videos actually has a, a similar beginning to yours. I did my research. Really? Yeah. Anthony, you started off with a flash animation to yours. I did my research. Really? Yeah. Anthony, you started off with flash animation.

Yes. Yes. In 2002, I made Smosh.com. And at that time, I was super into flash animation on Newgrounds. Did you use Newgrounds? Yeah. Holy shit. Like stick figure animations and shit like that?

I was fascinated with animation. I did Macromedia Flash. Like I literally... Do you have any of your flash animations? I was fascinated with animation. I did Macromedia Flash. Like I literally... Do you have any of your Flash animations? I don't believe so. I think one is on the internet somewhere. I don't even remember. I don't know how to like access it.

I don't know how to find it. I would love to see one of your Flash. But it was like the shittiest one. Like I actually did a really good one when I was at Parsons. Like I took a summer semester at Parsons specifically on Mac or media flash, like learning how to do two dimensional design. And you know,

that was what my first inception yours. Let's talk about you though. You're the guest. Yeah. I love that so much. And I was submitting my animations to new grounds and they were getting blammed. Do you remember that term?

I never submitted. Okay. So they were getting blammed. Do you remember that term? I never submitted. Okay, so they were getting voted down and if they didn't have something over a 3.5 rating or something like that, it wouldn't be allowed to live on the site. So they were mid. You were making mid. I was making real mid.

Mid, that's even being a little generous. Really? Some of them are still online. I think you could find them. No way. They were so rough. Let's try to find it. Shit, I don't know what you have to type

in to find it uh i'm in the same go to the new grounds portal so you drew you like started off in the visual arts uh kind of just because i wanted to make jokes and and you know stupid stuff in my mind come to life on the screen and it wasn't getting accepted to this website so i made my own rip off of the Flash portal called the Flash Gateway, which I just literally typed in like synonyms for portal. And I just made my own version of that. And actually, if you've ever heard of Tom Ska, who made the ASDF movie, he makes like these really he made these really popular Flash animations for a while. And he said he told me that he was getting rejected from Newgrounds and he was accepted on Smosh.com in the Flash gateway. And that's what encouraged him

to continue creating stuff at that time. So there was like a little legacy of the Flash. I did not know that part. That is wild. So that was really cool. But talk more about your transition from Flash animation to making video. Yeah, so I borrowed my dad's webcam.

I grew up with very very little money and even like getting my hands on the tech to create this stuff was just insane for me but my dad uh had some tech he had a webcam and i remember over at his house i was like are you using this thing i never see you use this thing can i borrow it i brought over my place never gave it back uh but uh my friend ian and i were just hanging out and i had this new webcam can i borrow it i brought over my place never gave it back uh but uh my friend ian and i were just hanging out and i had this new webcam and i was trying i was obsessed with learning every single thing about the internet and technology and things that i could do with it because i grew up with an agoraphobic mother i felt very trapped in my house if you don't know

what that is it's where you feel like your only safe space is, you know, in a very confined area. So for me or for my mom, it was within my house. And I had this lingering fear that I was going to be trapped in my house my whole life. And I felt like I didn't really have any resources. So, uh, you know, whenever I would see my computer in my room that my dad bought for me, I would see that. I was like, that is, that is infinite possibilities. That's my gateway. Exactly. Bringing it back. And I was like, I can do anything with that. All I have to do, like the only limit is my knowledge about this stuff. So I was teaching myself about all these things. So I wanted to learn how to edit. And, uh, I was playing, I was, uh, illegally downloading some, uh, the childhood theme songs that I grew up with.

You're going to jail. I know. And I'm okay with that. We wouldn't download a car. It was so funny because when those ads came out, I was like, yeah, but if I could duplicate it, no one would know. Yeah, I would duplicate a car. That's what I'm saying.

When I saw that ad for the first time, I was like, of course I would download a car. What the fuck are you talking about? Right, it's not taking it. It's duplicating it. Also, that song that they had in the ad, there was no reason it went that hard.

It was all grainy like the episode of A Wire, you know what I mean? That aesthetic is like super back now too. Yeah. The Y2K aesthetic. Yeah.

That shit's popping. It's vintage. We should make a trailer for our stream or our podcast like the, you wouldn't duplicate a car that's why you should that's why yes i would that's why you should go to patreon.com free or an yeah to unlock i'm gonna support some of the episodes i'm gonna support that shit

so um i had just downloaded them and i was playing the uh those songs and i started like lip syncing to it like over the top just ridiculous because at the time there were some viral videos of people lip syncing to things but they were like lip syncing to backstreet boys in like a very serious way where they were kind of like doing it looked like they were doing karaoke and i was like what if we just kind of turn this to 11 yeah like that flash animation over the top kind of comic book brought to lifestyle um and ian and i did that and i edited stayed up all night editing it and we just laughed together making all those cuts and it's it's so funny even looking back at the editing software was so crude at the time there'd be black spaces between every cut because nothing

would snap together and it was like, that's good, put it up there. Who gives a fuck? What'd you make it with? Like Movie Maker? Pinnacle, I think it was called Pinnacle. It was the editing software,

something that does not exist. The only experience I had with editing software was Final Cut 7. Oh yeah. No, I edited probably like eight years worth of Smosh videos on.

Did you ever edit off tape? Yes. Yeah. Oh my God, that's the worst. Yeah, and you have to do playback every single second. We recorded for like two hours and you have to play it back and be like, cool, come back

in two hours and it'll be loaded onto the computer. Yeah. That's crazy. That was rough. And you could hear the tape playing because it was all an internal microphone. Yeah. When I was in film school, they had digital at that point, but they're like, you got to learn tape because it's never going anywhere. Oh no,'s gonna be analog is here forever definitely wrong so uh we

are fucking old by the way we're so fucking there's no way they still edit on on tape now no fuck no they taught basically as like the they thought you were like the last class probably they thought it was the same as like still teaching photo students to use a dark lab. They wanted you to have that analytic experience of like having hands-on relationship with your tape, taking it off the tape, logging it, batching it, all that kind of shit. And that went away like moments after I learned it. Yeah, you were literally the last class. I feel like people still do that with photography but with with with internet video photography i think it's kind of how can i

explain it it's almost like a yoga process where it's like very like people like to get like they meditate in the process they like to get in the dark room and yeah well the other thing is a lot of people treat their photos in very weird ways with the like double expose it or do stuff like that there's cool tricks you can do. Yeah. Well, to the layman, it's like the coolest thing ever. But to a guy who's ever used a darkroom, it's like, oh, you spent 10 extra minutes on your photo.

Cool. Yeah. Yeah. So at that time, there was no place to upload video on the internet really at all, unless it's E-bombs world, which all they did was rip things off and put their URL huge on the screen. Not salty about that. Which they did is because we got so much shit for our videos when I tried to submit it there for a little bit.

Because I was like, that'd be sick to have our video hosted on a site where I didn't have to pay for the bandwidth. Because at that time, if someone viewed your content, especially video, it was coming out of your own pocket. So I got rejected from there. Um, and then I, we had a mice. No, I had a personal MySpace page with like a couple thousand people on there. And I hosted these little lip sync videos that we would make on my own website. And, uh, I created this little copy paste box where you could, where you had instructions like control a, then control C, then go to your page and then go to your MySpace editing editor and go press control V. And I had all the instructions there. And when

they did that, boom, it would go to their page and it would have the instructions pasted again. So that's how I made my own little viral chain. And I was really awesome. I was really, I mean, I saw that the, the monthly fees were like $300 one month and I had no money. So that's why when you look at those earliest videos, it says smosh.com because I was hoping people would go to the site, click some of the ads. I think I ended up making like 50 or a hundred dollars profit in the end, but still, you know, that wasn't bad. We put it all back into the videos themselves, but I did a google search i was like clearly this is being viewed there's no way to see where your videos were being viewed all i could see that

i was paying a shit ton of money at the time uh and i found that our which one was it our power no our mortal combat theme song uh lip sync video was uploaded to this site called youtube and it had like 100 views 10 comments or something like that. And I was like, we're doing it. I was like, Oh shit, you can upload to this site and you don't have to pay for it. Yeah. They're paying for you to upload your video to their site. Um, so then I messaged them. I was like, Hey, we're going to upload this ourselves. Cool. If you remove this and they're like, cool, we removed the video and we uploaded ourselves. And a couple of days later we made the pokemon one that you just mentioned and that blew up and went to the front page of youtube and youtube was getting all this traffic at the time everyone was writing

news articles youtube yeah yeah back then it was like having your fingertips on the pulse of the planet every single person that went to youtube.com saw that video on the front page back then too like the front page was the the highest viewed right like there was no curation so it was just like whichever video is the the highest view which they changed i believe very quickly they in 2011 there used to be oh i guess it's not very quickly then no not very quickly but at that time it was actually curated somehow uh they used to have that was the best at the bottom of each video it had a little link that said recommend for front page and i spammed the shit out of that because because i was a website designer at the time i knew that sometimes there were flaws in these types of systems when i was going to abuse them and i wanted to see what would happen if i did it i

don't know that was why it might have worked i like to think it worked how much did you fucking spam that shit i i sat there for an hour i was like i was like this might work this might work and i don't know if it did but it was on the front page and uh shit you're like this video has been recommended one million times yeah yeah doesn't even have that many views how did this happen people really must have loved it there was no checking or anything i don't know man but uh i like to think maybe that was uh the reason i had any career that's one hour of work that's now canon sure okay go getters sigma grind set music enters the room you know boom boom yeah you you you rose early and you fucking you rised in grind

grinded around i don't fucking know what I'm saying. I'm going to ask you a deep, impossible-to-answer question. Okay, yeah. Oh, brother, here we go. I'm great at answering those impossible questions. As someone who is so integral to the origins of YouTube and digital content, where do you think the future of digital content is? That's, it literally is impossible to say uh for a while i thought

youtube was possibly failing that's why i sold smosh in 2011 i was really nervous about what the future looked like um and then like even live streaming live streaming popping off in 2020 i was like oh maybe everything's gonna be live yeah uh and then tiktok came out of nowhere i thought that shit was gonna fail quick it did not um so you're really good at predicting so good at predicting trends but i think what do you think is gonna be a failure in the future just bet against them just so i can figure it out um all right let me let me go back go back to your oh no no i mean um but i do really think that it's going to be an ecosystem now where unfortunately you're gonna have to have your

hand in a little bit of everything yeah uh if you want to maximize it to its fullest potential it's like double dipping triple dipping people that do uh live streams you get to have the live stream and then you get to have the vods and then you get to have the clips from the vods and that's you get three different types of content maximizing the live streaming is perfect for that honestly like i i get to i get to clip out for tiktok i get to clip out for youtube you know but you don't even do that yourself right no you just have that's just fan uploaded content right i have a lot of fan uploaded content in the hasanabi clips industrial complex Complex. They're also on TikTok as well. I mean, that's like 55 million monthly views, I think.

It's like an insane amount. Yeah, like my YouTube channel itself gets like 25 million views a month, I think, which is not that great. Or I don't know. I think that's pretty good. 25 million a month is good. Okay, well, I get 25 million on my main page yeah and then the clips industrial complex in and of itself gets like 55 million plus a month that's

insane that's good for you though you see it as a good even though some people would say that's taking away no that's like eating away at 55 million views that i could have on my channel but i don't see it that way i don't really care about it. It's totally just like we have some boundaries, obviously, and some guidelines on what everyone in the community considers to be a faux pas. There was a channel that was like a bot farm that was trying to take advantage of this with like Moist Criticals clips as well. They were doing it for XQC as well, where they were like literally DMCAing other fan channels. Oh, shit.

Yeah, with my content like you know what i mean even though i released my ip uh on you know deliberately and that's a big no no uh you know you can't like you you can't basically make it seem like i made the video that's another thing like it needs to be like clearly defined as a fan channel even though most people still don't look at that and don't realize that it is a fan channel. And you also have to like, at least link it back to my YouTube page and my Twitch. Yeah.

It's like all I ask. I mean, before I knew, because I didn't just go to the page and like look in the bio to see, I was like, damn, Hassan has like, why does he running four different channels?

Like four. It's weird. He named his main channel Hassan as a thought. No, there are, I think there are like, there? It's weird he named his main channel Hasan as a thought. No, there are, I think there are like, there are more than 200, I think,

fan channels. Some of them range from like 30 subscribers all the way to a lot of them ranging at like the five to 10K to some that are verified by YouTube that are not affiliated with me. They're fan channels. Yeah, when you look up Hasanabi Clips, daily those are hasanabi hasanabi clips like and there's some are some are verified some are verified yeah i have also literally duked it out

with youtube to make it so that like you know they don't get demonetized yeah do you think there are so many because people hear that you encourage it um i think that yeah i think that there that is a reason and you see it as a positive because it's getting more of your stuff out there to you know more eyes my goal ultimately was to always reach as broad as an audience as possible yeah yeah and and so that was like i see this as a benefit it's kind of the viral video approach you know like well yeah but the viral video like obviously the fame and fortune that comes along with it is great but like i also have an overarching goal of like you know spreading my message as far as

possible like i do want people to watch it and go oh i hadn't really think it i haven't really thought about it like that you know that really changed my mind so if that's my goal then yeah i don't give a shit if people like literally steal my talking points or anything like that's what some people will say they'll be like oh this sounds like you and i'm like i don't that's great you know i want that's what you want you want more people to be talking about the things that you're talking about exactly and and have and have a shared perspective so you know it's it's it's doing something that i would otherwise want yeah and a lot of people want you know their their thoughts to be to live of people want, you know, their,

their thoughts to be, to, to live on and to be, you know, start discussions and in allowing people to rip off your content. It's. Yeah. Um,

what do you watch on YouTube? Uh, I'll give you an example of my secret pleasure. I like, uh, hoof grooming videos. Just, just cleaning the hoofs of yeah yeah they do

say they animals manage like the abscesses and it's like it's almost like a like a pimple popping video it's kind of got that effect of like kind of a deep sense of stress relief like it's gross but also a little satisfying yeah yeah yeah sure because you're ungrossing it. Yes, they're fixing it. Yeah, fixing the gross thing. Fixing the gross thing. Do you have anything like that that you're watching? I watch the strangest things. Usually when I put on YouTube,

I'm ready to sit down and watch a long, relaxing thing. So there's this channel, I think it's pronounced Liziki. Oh, yeah. Liziki? Yeah. Chinese master yeah yeah oh chinese master best girl best girl oh my god she's so amazing and i just imagine what my life would be like if i could live like that and even though she's doing so much hard work manual labor all these things like spending hours making food months making a certain dish essentially i'm like actually

it's reminding me that you know it can be relaxing to do things that i otherwise might find stressful you know yeah no her her people say it's ccp propaganda i'm like fucking i don't give a shit i don't give a shit if it is i love that i want to live in the chinese rural yeah village yes and then also kurtzgesagt, you know, for those educational videos. They're animated videos that take one topic that's kind of an absurd thing. Like, I mean, I can't think of any off the top of my head right now. I don't consume any YouTube for fun. Really?

It's all work? Do you consume any at all? Just non-searching. That's wrong. You just talked about Lizzy. That's wrong. You just talked about Lizzy Key. That's wrong. He's saying that he doesn't watch any videos for fun off of his stream. Yeah.

But he's streaming 11 hours a day. True. So he's watching videos for him. Yeah. Yeah, I watched almost all of it is watching videos. But when it comes down to when I turn off the stream and i sit back i kick back i'm not youtube app no that's not true i watch i watch anime i watch anime i watch movies i watch uh tv shows i never will like turn on youtube and be like let me let me watch my

favorite youtube channel i feel like whenever i pull up youtube in my free time for the most part i am just kind of seeing like what the environment is looking like you know what types of videos are on the trending page what types of videos are popping up and recommended to me i watch a lot of new york jets content too oh i big time you literally while we were going live uh on the podcast we're watching a clip i was watching rich ison yeah yeah is that sports anytime sports yeah that's my brain it's. My brain is out. My brain is out. No, not interested. It's okay. Wrong crowd, bro.

You're fully jetted up right now. I just want to be honest about what I'm doing. I also watch Jets content on the elliptical at the gym. Yeah. Nice. Yeah, yeah. You're like, go team. We'll just draft speculation.

Oh, I know there's so much more to it than just like it's so masturbatory when you are a fan of a bad sports team yeah it's always like hope for tomorrow yeah so it gives you something to look forward to yeah it's like political content where you just keep watching different videos until you find the take that best suits your hope and ambition then you go that's what's gonna happen even though you know it's not even though you you know you live in a hellscape and the jets so that's when we all thought bernie was gonna win for one second bernie sanders is the jets yeah you're the rich eisen of socialism yeah yeah you just i will hope i have no idea what that means that's okay okay yeah j-e-t-s just yes yes baby you mentioned legacy

what do you want your legacy to be on the internet good god oh i'm just throwing i'm just throwing six shades of shit yeah yeah um let's see shit should i refer to my notes uh let's see my legacy how do you want people to remember what you've made on the internet i guess you know it's there's two different sides to the time. There's lots of different type of content that I want to make. You know, there's the content that I make now, deep conversations, people sometimes we get into philosophical conversations. Sometimes we just talk about things in a vulnerable way that most people aren't always comfortable talking about. I like, I want people when they watch that stuff to, um, to just kind of have their wheels turning afterward to think like,

Oh, am I, you know, suppressing something? If I talk about something like this openly, am I going to feel better? Like watching people have these kinds of open conversations, I hope will encourage others to have open conversations about themselves and

be vulnerable or might consider therapy or like even getting into different parts of their history that may have shaped them and why they think and do the things that they do. Let's open that up. What would you ask us? I've interviewed this fucker. I've already done it. Yeah.

Okay. You have an ability to make fun things bad. I watched you watch the same show that I watch, the Joe Schmo show, and you managed to suck all the joy out of it. That's not true. People loved it. No, they love you.

But they love me for that analysis. I was baffled. You're like a Debbie Downer. No. Yes, you're- No, I was having so much fun with Matt. You frequently bring the mood down. Okay, go on.

What was, what would the question be? Okay, you know, so when I, I've changed up the way I do it a little bit since I interviewed you, Hasan, but when I get on a pre-interview call with someone, I kind of rapidly go through the different types of topics that I'm hoping to talk about with them, but one thing that's a little bit open ended that I usually integrate into the

final interview is I would say like, are there any moments from your childhood or, you know, just growing up in general that you think shaped you or made an impact that has, you know, lasted with you to this day. And then we kind of usually get there.

So like, and I was in my English lab at Blair Academy. I saw a video on YouTube. I thought you were going to say the porn thing. Do you have a video that you said you made? What was it? Naughty Neff? Oh yeah.

Yeah. The fake adult website. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Which by the way, people say that a lot of different creators say that, that early stuff that we were doing made some impact or encourage them to do

what they do. And it just does not resonate with you. You don't own it to the point where you say, I'm like, why don't you own it? I feel like it's just hard for me to, I don't know if it's just that, I don't know if it's imposter syndrome or what,

but Oh, we all have a little bit of like, not me, not this motherfucker. You are Debbie Downer. Your vibes are fucked, dude. I'm fucking her out.

Go on, sorry. No, no, you're good. Yeah, it's a little bit like, I feel like if it wasn't what I was doing,

it would have been someone else anyway. So it's not really like that big of a moment. Like, I don't know. So I have an interesting thing that i believe in it's like one of the few little bits of mysticism that i keep in my life okay there is a south african deity that they believe in called spiritus mundi and spiritus mundi is a like a um and i might be botching this but this is how it was told to me by my drunk south

african friend is like a is like a spirit of inspiration okay spiritist moon day gives us all good ideas uh-huh spiritist moon day is very fickle very bitter and if you don't act on that good idea it takes it and gives it to someone just close enough to you that you have to see it succeed oh okay so and i've experienced that in my life i feel you that you have to see it succeed. Oh, okay. And I've experienced that in my life, I feel like. Do you have any examples that you would feel comfortable saying? Of a good idea that I saw just take flight somewhere else. Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, I can think of a few, but I think it's like something that everyone experiences where you have an idea and you're like, oh, that'd be great. And then you see it flourish. So like to a certain extent, yes, I'm sure someone else would have cornered the market on kind of the first very whimsical smash sketch on YouTube. But it was you. Yeah. Still, my brain shuts down a little bit when I I'm like, hmm. Yeah, no, it's,

it's, it's really interesting. I feel like one thing that I have always been really good at is if I have an idea, I feel like I can't not do it. It really, it eats at me. It's all I think about. Where do you think that comes from? Is that, does that come from the agoraphobic home life and kind of like this want to escape? I think it's a little bit. Yeah, you know, I think it is a little bit of like, I think growing up, I always wanted to say to my mom, like, I just destroyed this very expensive setup. No, no, no. That part breaks all the time.

That is kind of cool, though. I don't know how the flip up like that. I got my tricks, okay? Is the audio still fine on will's mic by the way okay perfect i do think it's from that i think it was a little bit of me wishing i could because my mom would tell me all these things that she wanted to do she wanted to go out she wanted to be able to get the job at the preschool down the street she she wanted to do all these things and i i wanted to just be like just do it please just please just do it. You know, you know, the steps and I, I, in my own head, I'd be like, I'd work backwards. I'd be like, okay, then you have to do this first. And then that second,

and then that third and then fourth, you do it like that's, we just, you have to do it. And it's like this, uh, innate drive that I can't help, but just want to see the things that are in my mind come to fruition. I think it did come from that experience that at the time I considered a really negative experience. Yeah. I hated growing up in a house feeling trapped and it's really cool now being able to look back and see all the ways that it's motivated me to become who I am. Well, that always seems to be the case, right, is that trauma is more formative than good things, which is kind of ironic. Yeah.

Speaking of things that you want to come to fruition that you internalize and you drum up, this is a classic Wilneff question that I'm going to ask you. What's a piece of content that you wish you could make that would define your legacy and that people would look back at and say, that's Anthony Padilla?

Yeah, what's it look like is a movie is it a song is it a one-man two-hour stage show it's so hard because i feel like there's not ever one piece of anything that could ever actually define anyone sure and i think in the history books we think that's the way it is we're like this thing happened and then that was what this person is known for and that's what we teach when in reality they had all these little details in their life that are actually more wanted to be though. All right, fine.

Uh, play the game. God damn it. Broke it down, dude. Broke down your, I think, God,

I can't say exactly what it would be, but I could say the elements. I think it would be something that, you know, in the same way you were inspired by our crude lip sync video, it would be something that could inspire people that watch, like, let's say it was like an hour and a half piece of content that felt like a movie. I'd want to do it on like a very, very, very low budget just to show anyone that they could do it if they wanted to as well. Yeah. And it would be something that would, you know, on the surface just appear entertaining,

but then, you know, the takeaway, I would want people to kind of have it ruminate in their mind and then they can, I would want it to kind of catch people off guard and be like, Oh shit, I didn't realize that this is a value that it was teaching me. It was something that taught me, you know, something that I'm, I'm having a more and more firm belief is that aging is something that really happens more so in our mind and also from a lack of, you know,

keeping up our physical body. So, you know, like I'm 35 and people. Damn, you look good. I'll just say it. It's hot

but very hot very hot for all of you at home he's as hot as he looks on camera yeah even hotter

strikingly hot so you know and people are like oh I'm getting into my 30s of course my knee hurts of course my back hurts of course my

what do you do to keep yourself on course yoga so actually I want to get back I want to do yoga. I got really inspired by seeing people. Actually, my tattoo artist, I started following her on Instagram, and she does these crazy yoga poses.

And I was so impressed because this is all hand poke. Jesus Christ, brother. It's like over a lot of my body. How much time is that? It was two eight-hour sessions and one six-hour session. Insane. So she just had so much stamina the whole time and i was i was like because she was also in her 30s but she looks damn good and i was like there's got to be some kind of kind of some kind of secret here and i i started kind of observing and she does this the most insane yoga poses like it's nothing and she's fit as hell limber just very limber and uh also i

interviewed contortionists and uh one of the contortionists talked a lot about how you know she she wasn't just like born like with a bendy body she had to just train and train and train and you know it made me realize that in my head i thought that there was this physical wall this limitation like oh i just can't do that. So why bother? Oh, it hurts when I move down and try to touch my toes. That's just the way it is. But I'm realizing that it's just comes from a lack of pushing your body, kind of like the discomfort, you know? So I've started to welcome a little bit of discomfort that I used to view as pain. And in the process of getting like a hand poke tattoo, there was a lot of that as well, um, of getting in the mind of like, Oh, I'm welcoming this. This isn't actually

pain. Uh, this is discomfort. And in my mind I saw discomfort and pain as the exact same thing. And you know, I realized that there really is a mindset that is the difference there. So, you know, I, I I've started stretching more. I started, I want to be able to do some insane yoga shit. He can palm the ground now. Oh, I showed him. I showed him. I had to show someone.

Palm the ground? Yeah, without bending my knees. Whoa. Yeah. I think I can do that. Let's see it. Palm the ground? Yeah, without bending your knees.

Without bending your knees though. Without bending my knees? Yeah. Can you? Wait, you didn't bend your knees at all? No. Bro, you are so. He bent it a little bit.

But still, that looks easy. You made that look easy. Okay, you opened up. He opened up full stance. Oh, wait. Do legs together. Feet together. It's a little harder.

A little harder? Yeah, you didn't quite palm the ground. Okay, let's see. Let's see. Legs together. Big Hank Parker. Big Hank Parker, but I'm double-jointed. You guys better thank me.

In your jaw? Are you the throat cone? Oh, that's a band. Also legs together. Yeah, you were calling me out. I know, right? I'm not a band, but feet together. Yeah, you would call me out. I know. I could just die. But let feet together.

Yeah. Yeah. See? See? It's hard. It's hard. It's hard. Yeah, it's hard. It's tough.

I can touch, but I can't. We just got our first physical demonstration on Fear and Podcast. And I feel better already. We do physical demonstrations all the time, but that's usually behind the paywall. Oh, yeah. Fearann.com slash Patreon, which we will get to in a little bit.

I mean, Patreon.com slash Fear Ann, which we will get to in a second. Plug, plug, plug, baby. Are you vegetarian? Yeah, I'm vegan. Dude, something about a hand poke tattoo gave that away. What? For real?

Yeah. He was talking about discomfort and pain. I do something about a hand poke tattoo gave that away for real. Yeah. 10 years. He was talking about discomfort and pain. You got to eat through the discomfort. Shit. I don't remember I was going with it, but you know, I've just been kind of trying to remind myself,

Oh yeah. Back to aging, you know, and I, I want to be an example for my parents, you know, cause, cause it's a lot of,

Oh, well I'm just, I'm in my fifties now. That's just the way it is. And I want to be able to for my parents, you know, cause, cause it's a lot of, oh, well, I'm just, I'm in my fifties now. That's just the way it is. And I want to be able to show them that, you know, if I can do it, they can too. You know, if I could get more limber kind of, cause the more that I stretch and work out, the more that I actually feel, I feel like I feel like 10 years younger than I did like two years ago. Oh yeah. Yeah. And it's a huge piece of that. Oh yeah. And interviewing contortionists, it was was like anyone can do it and she's like oh when i i fell in the splits formation and i was fine even though most people would have like ripped something i was like i want to make sure that i'm not getting

injured in all these ways i feel like for me it's interesting i think he had a similar experience covid not having covid but the era that was hard lockdown COVID fucked my shit up. Your body was fucked? Yeah, because they locked down the gyms. They put padlocks on the playgrounds. You couldn't do pull-ups. You couldn't go out and run.

And so I would do walks around Beverly Hills at 4 a.m. like a psychopath. He's lying. He also did rollerblading i rollerbladed sick dude but i did fall do not knock it till you try no i'm not i've never told anybody how badly i fell one night but i fell really like on a sidewalk on asphalt i was going down a hill pretty fast and i i i beefed it and i think I tore my rotator cuff. Damn. Were you wearing like any protective gear?

Yeah. Yeah? Yeah, not a helmet though. Oh. Pinged my dome off the ground. Did you hit your head? Oh, yeah. He's got a fat one though.

He's fine. Yeah, I got a bulbous dome. Yeah. Bad head. Me too. I have to wear a large helmet. Yeah. Yeah, me too.

You have to wear a triple XLl helmet shit yeah thank you for saying that because people don't understand they always say i have a small head but i don't just so you got a very broad such a big body you just got a very big broad body okay moving on from the uh the covet thing or at least like talking about that um what was your what was your experience like with the with the lockdowns in general yeah i didn't think it was getting to me as much as it did but something i felt so trapped and isolated in a way where i felt like i had no right to complain you know what i mean because so many other people had it so much worse that i was like it's fine it's fine and i think that just in my

head i constantly had a voice just saying it's fine it's fine it's fine until you know i would recognize that some days i would just feel like complete shit i didn't want to do anything i didn't want to talk to anyone i just sat there with my internal monologue just constantly playing about how everything is going to shit the world's going to shit you know and i, it was really reflected in my content. I started interviewing. I, I did, I spent a day with kidnapping survivors, school shooting survivors, uh, human trafficking survivors, death row survivor. It was all these like really, really deep, intense topics where it was, you know, there would be some positive takeaways and I'd, I'd find ways to be inspired by them. Thankfully I was doing the interviews at the time

because I feel like talking to people, uh, you know push had it way worse yeah i pushed through these insanely difficult things in their life like speaking to a death row survivor someone who's on death row for 45 50 60 years for something that they did not do and how they get through it you know and they talk about the ways that they coped some of them got religious some of them just got into yoga some of them like the ways that they were able to stay within their mind and something that was so much more like clearly just solitary confinement compared to what i felt like covid lockdown was solitary confinement but they were like the the definition of what that actually was a human rights abuse human rights violation yeah isolation fraggle rocks the mind so hard did you guys have difficulty

through that time period as well absolutely i i the thing is like uh in the same way that you uh found solace through interviewing people yeah i did the same thing i i just i streamed 42 of the entire year i was in front of a camera for the entire year that's not even including sleeping right that's separate no just separately yeah the rest of it was sleeping yeah yeah yeah it was basically just sleep wake up and then stream yeah and that's that's what i did to like keep myself focused to have like a you know shared perspective have a community that I could rely on. Did you still feel isolated though? Because I was doing my interviews remotely.

Of course. There's a difference in communicating with people. Even if it's the same exact conversation via screen, there's something about reading body language and minute little details that you just do not get through a screen. No, it's not the same. It's definitely not's definitely not the same yeah yeah it doesn't hit the same my uh my brother died during like the isolation point part of covid and so i would i was streaming a lot too i would stream a lot then i would do vr a lot we did so much vr but i was bad i would get really ill. I would get very motion sick.

Oh, yeah. So I would get done at like four in the morning. And as I said, I would just go walk around Beverly Hills like a psychopath. I'm sure there were families in Beverly Hills that have CCTV footage of me just walking around or rollerblading. Yeah. Like this guy's scoping out a place for be on the lookout for the rollerblading yeah could could you could you visit your brother no no no i could there was not even a funeral because of like when it happened yeah it was not great yeah yeah my uncle passed also during that time, and it was like, it was so, I can, I cannot imagine,

like, you know, especially like if you're isolated in a hospital setting and you just have machines around you and sterile environment. Like, again, that's like the feelings I was feeling with COVID, but amped up to a thousand. I cannot even imagine. Yeah. All right. Let's move on to something a little bit light-hearted subject wise um actually i lied we're going to be talking about deep dark secrets but i think um on that note we can end the uh

unpaywalled portion of the broadcast here and move on to the juicy stuff i have a couple questions that might not even make it into the paywalled uh person if you're because i'm gonna ask you to cut them out yeah maybe i'm not even kidding okay i'll sit back i have some i have some questions lined up for you uh but uh where can people find you anthony uh you could find me on all social media platforms anthony padilla one word p-a-d-i-l-l-a padilla like tortilla yeah i have to say yeah you can say Padilla if you want That's what I say usually You know like quesadilla Jalapeno I don't know why I just

Find it so funny to say it So satisfying to say You're almost perfectly lined up with a Trump hat back there I can hear Hell yeah brother That's right Well you can find the rest of the episode The paywall proportion at patreon.com slash for your hand. And we'll see you on the next one.

See you there. I think this might be one of my favorite episodes. Yeah, I was about to say. Thank you, guys. This has been one of the most personal. That was so fun. And one of the best episodes we've shot, for sure. Did you guys learn anything about yourselves?

About the world? I don't know if I about yourselves about the world about your way of thinking but i think i think it's always therapeutic to voice things that yeah yeah it's i'm gonna be honest usually the the spicy content is us you know uh saying something yeah yeah getting something out of it's interesting that we both kind of revealed things about our careers that we had never previously. Yeah. Very therapeutic.