Fear& - Will Neff is a HERO, Mr Beast vs Jacksepticeye Drama & More | Fear&Austin'sQTs

Episode Date: September 4, 2023

The adhd podcast is back with a labor day special (its just a regular episodes, streamers dont know what the fk a holiday is they dont actually work lets be real) and we talk juicy topics like, will neff being an actual hero, jimmy buffets death, mr beast vs jackspeticeye and more. Okayge goodbye love ya thanks for watching :)🎉BONUS CONTENT🍾 🌟PATREON - https://www.patreon.com/FearAnd🎧 AUDIO PLATFORMS - https://linktr.ee/fearand✰ follow Fear&! ✰Hasan: https://twitter.com/HasanthehunWill: https://twitter.com/TheWillNeffQT: https://twitter.com/QTCinderellaAustin: https://twitter.com/AustinontwitterMarche: https://twitter.com/MarcheFear&: https://twitter.com/FearAndPod0:00 - Intro / Hasan's lack of hospitality2:09 - QT Cinderella Duck Tazer05:05 - WillNeff saves the day!13:30 - BINGO AUSTIN MENTIONS D*CKS (FEAR&Boobs)19:40 - I feel sorry for QT Cinderella 23:30 - RIP Jimmy Buffet25:12 - Hasan's Pop-up shop29:30 - Willneff / QT Cinderella Body Off38:20 - Hasan's parents want him to do more41:50 - QT Cinderella house designer48:40 - Sorry audio listeners, house reviews50:59 - TSTD - TALK SHIT TALK DRAMA53:00 - Jack's septic eye VS Mr. Beast Drama57:30 - Fast food vs Quality dining (Content creation)1:00:20 - The Streamy's SUCKED1:03:30 - Austin's Quties at 30,000 patreon subs Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I'm like so worried about my sister. You're engaged. You cannot marry a murderer. I was sick, but I am healing. Returning to W Network and STAK TV. The West Side Ripper is back. If you're not killing these people, then who is? That's what I want to know.

Starring Kaley Cuoco and Chris Messina. The only investigating I'm doing these days is who shit their pants. Killer messaged you yesterday? This is so dangerous. I gotta get out of this. Based on a true story. New season Mondays at 9 Eastern and Pacific. Only on W. Stream on Stack TV. Are we recording?

Okay, we're recording. All right. Cutie, what the hell is going on? I'm working. She's working. She's always working. Cutie never stops working. Cutie every week comes in last, even though she's not even as far from our place any longer.

That is true. Yeah. I fly in every time i chop her in to the podcast this is not even a joke land in the front yard of his son's mansion are you staying here yeah i'm staying here oh not in this house he's lying no i'm not staying at the house no oh wow i thought you were well i'm sorry if he had water that worked. Oh. Austin, we have water that works, man. It's just you don't work. No, Hasan. The water works. You don't work. We established that.

You know what? Next, you know, look. Have you ever bathed in a drinking fountain? Last. That's the water pressure of Hasan's shower. Three episodes ago. Wow. We established that you are fraudulent.

Okay, no. That you were aware. I couldn't get the temperature right. Well, now Okay, no. That you were aware. I couldn't get the temperature right. Well, now you're aware. Now you're aware. You can stay, but I've also disinvited you. Oh, now I'm not allowed at your house? Your open invitation.

Yeah. Next time you come in, your door codes are probably not going to work. No, no, no. Look, Hassan, I appreciate you every time you let me stay at your house. Yeah. No, you don't. I do. I do.

Does he appreciate me every time? I don't think so. I don't know. I think that's why he stays at a hotel the next time is because the service was so bad here. The service. See, Cutie won't even stay here. She and I are aligned.

We're a team. We're a team. Yeah. Why would she stay here? Yeah. It's because she doesn't live in fucking Washington. You hate women and homosexuals. Yeah, and we've wanted to have a sleepover,

and you won't let us have it. That's not true. That actually works for me, because if I ever have a freestyle meltdown, I want a permanent bedroom here. Oh, that'd be fun. Speaking of permanent bedrooms, QT came in and immediately was like,

we're gutting one of your rooms. I was like, okay, I guess. They don't like the set, guys. Sorry. Oh, okay, I guess. They don't like the set, guys. Sorry. Oh, oh, do not, you fraudulent bitch. They don't like the room. We were all like, yeah, we'll rent a place. We'll get a studio.

And Hasan was like, oh, I can't even drive two seconds to go. That's why we're building it in your house because you're literally a camel and we can't take you to water. Okay, to be fair, okay, that's it. I like that he's a camel. Culturally insensitive of you.

You are Turkish. You are Turkish. It's culturally insensitive. That's number one. Oh my God. My people have been compared to camels for far too long. Oh Jesus.

No, all jokes aside, it's just like, if we were to get a studio that we rent out, it would be incredibly expensive. It would literally not be here. It would be like East LA, easy. So that would be an issue. We hate East LA. It's also very dangerous for us.

Because we're so pretty. We're pretty. People might hurt us. Yeah. Yeah. No. East LA is already massively gentrified. But even before then, that's a ridiculous statement.

I was on a walk this morning. And have you guys seen my taser? It's like a little ducky. You have a taser? Yeah. It's Allie Tha. She makes the most amazing self-defense Roman, and it's a little duck taser. Look it up.

Look it up. Let's pull it up. I want to see this. Yeah. I'm on a walk. I'm walking. I go to this smoothie place every morning, and I'm in there, and it's run by this amazing Asian woman, but she has the thickest accent, and she's pointing at my taser like, what

is that? What is that? What is that? And I'm like, taser? And then I show her my taser, and she's like, don what is that and i'm like taser and then i show her my taser and she's don't use that i was like okay okay i won't i won't like as if you were gonna taste like i was gonna taste her wait what the fuck there's so much more tiny protectors is that like a gun on a gaming chair yeah she's she's amazing the duck is sold out she does drops but those like the keychains are little stabby things.

Like, the bat is a taser. You take off the thing. And they're, like, really powerful. Wait, the keychain is a little stabby thing? Wait, wait, wait. What is that? Have you been able to get through? Show me.

Can you get through an airport with one of these? I guarantee TSA is not catching me with this. Those are, like, yeah, safety alarms. These, the little beetle, you put it around your knuckles so you can stab in the cherry. That is insane. Yeah, I've gotten those. That is insane. That's a weapon. That's not even

self-defense, but it's self-offense. Yeah, it's really cool. But I was really proud of myself. Can you go back? There was a gaming chair? Is that also self-defense? That's a self-defense gaming chair. No, she's just got into design. She started with self-defense? That's a self-defense gaming chair. No, no, no. That's just a cute chair. She's just got into design. She started with self-defense, but then she... That's just a cute chair.

She's just an amazing designer. I thought there was like turrets or something. There's razor blades under the pillow. She's very talented. I actually have a taser-based story that I think you guys will like. Really? Oh, I love that. That happened recently.

Uh-huh. Uh-oh. So I was in bed. I knew it was sexual. Nope. Nope. Nope. Getting ready to do a Donner performance the next day. I was in bed I knew it was sexual nope nope getting ready to do a

Donna performance the next day or extra Emily and so I was in bed early this was like last week yeah this was like last week I was gonna tell this story anyway

oh okay tasers on the brain so into it so Carolina and I are in bed at like one o'clock which is early for us and we just hear someone laying on the brain. So into it. So Caroline and I are in bed at like one o'clock, which is early for us.

And we just hear someone laying on the horn. Wah, wah, wah. Outside of our apartment. And we're like, what the hell is going on? And we hear screaming. Caroline is like, I gotta go see what that is. Okay, that's right off the bat insane. That is completely.

I love her. Why would she do that? Because it was like, we were at like five minutes of horn at this point. Even then, I'd be like... She just wanted to see. Hassan would go back to bed. She just wanted to see.

Yeah, I don't wake up for nothing. Caroline puts on a robe. She goes out on our front deck. And I hear like, I don't know, Will! So I throw on silk pajamas, and I hear like, so I throw on silk pajamas and I grab my stun gun, which has a laser and a flashlight on it. And it has gas. It's the one that,

yeah, it has one of those. It's the one that cops use. It like puts barbs in you and it goes, damn. So I got a little duck. As I go outside, It puts barbs in you and it drops you. Damn. I would totally miss. I got a little duck. As I go outside, there is a car behind another car and it's ramming this car.

That's how. And then it just lays on the gas and it tries to push this car. This car is a crazy 40-year-old white dude and this car is a young black couple and they have no idea why this is happening. They're like what the fuck is going on? So they get out of their car

to be like what is happening? They get out of the car this guy tries to kill them. He does like 30 miles per hour. Super casual. Tries to hit the guy misses the guy

versus 30 miles per hour tries to run over the girl flies into the Oh Caroline tweeted about to run over the girl flies into the oh Caroline tweeted about this yeah flies into the shrub hedge by our building then throws it and drive

tries to hit her again reverse and at that moment where was the house the girl the girl that sprung in the ass I sprung in the ass oh yeah

for sure I assess the situation oh you're like I gotta tase it gotta use it so I anything dangerous

ever happen to me I want Will there me too so I leapt up on the balcony of my deck and i put the laser beam on his forehead oh yeah flashlight and he didn't know that it was a stun gun he thought it was a gun and i was like turn off your car motherfucker yeah and this dude took his hands off the wheel and like the the guy the couple is like now smashing on his window because it's like insane and i was like get inside guys it's not worth it i didn't want to tell him this is not really a gun there's nothing

i could do in this situation but i'm like get inside get inside so i pull them inside and then the dude floors it like he just speeds off and caroline's like where did you get a gun? And I was like, it's the stun gun. She's like, what's wrong with you? Oh, my God. But I saved the day. The LAPD showed up. The night crawler unit, all the guys with cameras to look for a dead body pulled up. Oh, my God. They didn't do anything.

They didn't do anything. Yeah, which is awesome. The LAPD chief that was there was a female. And she kept being like, but there were no victims, right? And I was like, this guy tried to kill them. And she being like, but there were no victims, right? And I was like, this guy tried to kill them. And she was like, buddy, there are no victims, right? And I was like, smashed their car and then tried to vehicular manslaughter. And she's like, right.

Like she was trying to like deescalate it. Dude, I love that it's like, you know, attempted manslaughter. Attempted vehicular manslaughter is not that bad in the eyes of the Los Angeles Police Department. Where they're just like, ah, fuck it. But I'll tell fuck it but i'll tell you this one thing eight million dollars a day just want to point that out no politics on the podcast but they do they do cost us they're funded better than most militaries across the world yes that is true the one thing i have used a lot of their money to swap me yeah all the budget is going to swatting cutie cinderella we don't know how to stop this.

Thank you, guys. The real victim in this situation, though, was Caroline. Or the people who almost got racially manslaughtered. That too, but I have been insufferable around the house ever since I was a hero. Ever since you're a protector, yeah. I literally, everything, I'll be like, hero coming through. You know, usually I only save one person at a time, but I was feeling pretty spry.

I'll be honest with you. I think I would have fired the shot. It's a taser. He can't shoot through the windshield, dog. It's a taser. Oh, I would have. Well, that's probably why I'm not in your position. Once he busted that nut, the guy would have been like,

oh, no, I'm going to continue with my racial hate crime. Oh, did you think it was like a good dummy? Like, did you think he would think it was a gun? Does he look like a real, does it look like a real gun? Well, dude, all he was seeing was it has a flashlight. So there's a flashlight on his face and a laser in the middle of his forehead. Jesus Christ. That's crazy.

He had to be like, wake up, dude. Dead right. That's insane. What would your backup plan have been? It would have been really funny if the LAPD arrested you for attempted murder. No, they kept asking me. They're like, where's the gun? I was like, it's not a gun.

It's a taser. Yeah, of course. They're looking for something. They just need to bust somebody. Yeah, they just beat the shit out of you. Get down. Quit resisting. It was fucked up, and I felt very bad for this young couple.

What did the couple say? The young woman was very traumatized. Oh my God, of course. She wasn't saying much of anything. And the dude was just like, dude, thank you so much. We're around hundreds of people here and you're the only person who came out to help us.

That is wild. That is so wild. And they didn't cut this guy off or anything. He just started, dude, LA. Yeah, LAPD, very good at finding cars as well. Even when you find it yourself, they're very good at finding cars as well even when you find it yourself they're very good

at taking the car back Ellie needs a dark night Ellie deserves a better class of hero yeah dude it's just

it's so so so incredibly ridiculous well you know they gotta quit defunding the police isn't that right Cutie yeah I know

that's what it is why are you asking Cutie for that we're on the same team today really was that established I'm so scared what that could be no They got to quit defunding the police. Isn't that right, Cutie? Yeah, I know. That's what it is. Why are you asking Cutie for that? We're on the same team today. Really? Was that established? I'm so scared what that could be. No, it's fine.

I don't know what it means. I was obviously kidding for those of you who are taking that seriously. We're not defunding the police. They're very well funded. Cancel this, man. $8 million a day, which is way too much. So, that's crazy. I think I'd get hit by the car on accident.

I don't think I could dodge it. Oh, yeah. How were they dodging it? I would have, I don't know. She was literally, like, sidestepping it and clearing it by, like, that much. That's insane. I think I would, like, jump on top of my own car to try to not get hit. Yeah.

But then you would just barrel it into your own car, right? It's also, like, so fast. You can't believe, like, how quickly those things are happening. It's so crazy. I wouldn't be able to react quick enough. Was he bald? No, he was like a four-year-old guy with hair, but he was just like stark raving mad.

He was insane. This was over a parking spot. He was trying to kill them. Oh, it was because they parked in his spot? Jesus. Austin's like, I've been there. No. So do you think that guy lives in the building?

I could never win a fight. I don't think he lives at our building. I think he lives on the road. Oh, we're going to find him. Yeah, Cutie and I are going out. I'm going to use my duck taser. I'm going to use my bear spray. We're going to get him.

I have bear spray, and she's got a duck taser. He stands no chance. This guy's done for. Yeah. Cutie Cinderella. Two paranoid hypochondriacs. Yeah. That's a great show. Oh, tickle him. Two paranoid hypochondriacs. He'd hate it. Cutie Cinderella Two paranoid hypochondriacs Yeah That's a great show

Oh tickling Two paranoid hypochondriacs I hate it Cutie and I Anyway I thought you guys Would enjoy that Wow Investigate crimes

And solve them What did Caroline tweet about it She tweeted basically That she wanted to She was really upset That the LAPD didn't do anything Yeah Yeah

It's The LAPD LAPD with the callous indifference Like ha It's just attempted manslaughter It's fine She said that the funniest part though, is like,

I don't know if you guys know this, you probably know this. My hero in life is Patrick Swayze. Big Patrick Swayze guy. Oh really? I didn't know that. Big Patrick Swayze guy. And she was like,

she was like, you were there in silk pajamas with basically your cock out, standing on an elevated balcony, holding a gun, as I thought, with like long floppy hair, and just screaming.

And she's like, that was the closest you'll ever be to someone. I'll be honest. That would be your superhero. Just a roadhouse. Cock man. And your cock would have nothing to do with fighting crime, but your costume would just have your cock out. Oh, there you go. And there it is.

That's a bingo. Austin is back at it again. Talking about dicks. No more dicks. I actually have some. I want to talk about boobs today. Oh, my God. I want to talk about boobs.

Look at you. No, I'm not. Oh, good. I'm not talking about cocks today. I want to say something yesterday. I went to, I don't know where the fuck I was. I was walking around. And look, I'm not attracted to boobs.

It's not my thing. You're a gay man. I'm a gay man. But I will tell you something. He thinks all tits look the same. No, no, no. Let me tell you something. Respectfully speaking, I want to say this respectfully.

Sometimes boobs are on display and I don't know what it is. It's like they have like a chakra or something like that. Like I am attracted to looking at them. Can I show you something? Yeah. Okay. There is a ginger Scottish woman. You got my attention.

With bazookas. And I want Will's opinion on this as well. I think Susu posted about her. Look at Susu's Instagram. Yeah, you got my attention. Yeah, that's double the tits for you. There you go. But it's like...

Yeah, find Susu's Instagram. Finish your thought. Look, I... On IG. It's not even an attraction thing, but sometimes I'll see them and they will be just putting on a performance. Let me tell you something.

They are a marvel of human... I have developed neck muscles being a a boob first adhd young man they have a magnetic pull and i have to sometimes like look around a room to remain respectful that's what i'm saying because they are very i don't know what it is i don't know what it is but it, find the OG. No, find the actual. They are so intriguing to me. And it's not, there's no sexual attraction. Jesus! Oh, don't look at, don't look at shield. Shield thine eyes, heathen.

You are not ready. Okay, now go down. Oh, my Lord. This is all she does. She's so wet all the time. Okay, just click on any one of the wet ones. Can you show these? No, in the car.

Wet ones in the car. Yeah, that one. That one's perfect. Okay. Just click on any one of the wet ones. Can you show these? No, in the car. Wet ones in the car. Go. Yeah, that one. That one's perfect. Jesus. Oh, my Lord. Oh, my Lord. You can show that.

You can show that. My Lord. See, there's no, this does nothing for me, but I can't help but look. It's like watching my good. So, I wanted to show that, I wanted to bring this to William Ebersavage

and after third's attention because, like, I'm shocked that he hasn't even seen it. That shakes my bone marrow. So this, like, went viral on Twitter, one of those exact same videos. Not that one. Went viral on – Is she pretending that the rain has done this?

Yeah, she always – This is her entire thing. Yeah, I've only been outside for – Let's stop. Somebody at the top comment is, for one, I had no idea that it rains baby oil in the United States. I was about to say, this bitch fraudulent as hell.

Yeah, okay. Hey, water, that's baby oil. Okay, now, no, no, put the sound on. I want to hear her voice. Wrenched. I've got to go to a job interview like this. Oh, I've only been outside for two minutes and I am drenched. Oh,

that is awesome. You know what? You know what? I'm going to defeat the patriarchy today. Maybe she was on her way to a job interview. She wasn't. No, she was on her way to a job interview for CEO.

That's right, baby. Feminism. Of her own company. Look, I think that is- Beauty! You're setting women back, dude. No, I think that is nothing more empowering. Say it.

Say it. It's natural and it's beautiful. Say it! It is natural and it is beautiful and perfectly normal, natural, beautiful. You know. This is what God intended. When Hugh Hefner, Hugh Hefner who created Playboy said that he created Playboy to liberate women. I'm wheezing today, dude.

You know, and it is, I think she is her own CEO. And I think, yes, bitch, you get that back. Yeah. She's the CEO about it. She's the CEO of getting drenched with her milks, milkers out. When you think about it, when you think about it. Per weight. Is titty the most valuable resource on the planet next to like.

No. No. No. Heart. Our hearts. Wow. That was beautiful. Like beautiful actually donate like if you killed a man and you took his heart you could get more money for it i thought i thought you meant i thought you meant like no i meant like killing the organ trade on the black market yeah breasts are there's a lot they all look the same that that's insane. Okay, pull right back up. That's a different zip code of titties, Austin.

Look at that. That's not even in the same country. First me. That looks the same? Natural and beautiful. You don't have oil on your boobs right now. Natural and beautiful. It's not raining.

Dude, when she gets in the car, she throws her whole fucking. She does. She's trying to get some water bad ass. There's torque on those bad boys. You know what I mean? There's gravitational pull. To wrap this up, I just want to make a comment that breasts, sometimes they're out there putting on a show and I can't help but look.

And I'm not even attracted to it. Is that normal? Do you look at boobs too? Yes. I think there's a. I have a certain level of respect. I think there's a... I have a certain level of respect. I think there's a genetic imperative there. It's like a...

Well, you ate there. It was your favorite restaurant for many years. It helped you grow. So you think like when I see boobs, it's like, oh, I'm hungry. You go, dad, mama, mama. I hate this. I think it's just a font of life. Oh, I'm hungry.

You say, Mommy Milky. Anyway. Is that what you say? Do you get hungry when you see breasts? No. Oh, I get hungry. I get a hunger. Cutie, what do you think?

Do you think that? How is she making? I'm concerned about how she's making money off that. Does she have an OnlyFans at least? Because Instagram's not going to make her enough money. Cutie, we shouldn't check that. She has four million on TikTok. She's probably getting brand deals on TikTok.

She better be making bank, dude. You know, it's funny because one meme of being a... I mean, we should support the user for... What are we doing right now? What's happening? Sorry. Marge is, like, clicking on the OnlyFans link.

I just want to see what she's got. She's running a Labor Day sale. We should support her. Good. Those titties are doing... I'm happy she's making money off that because that's very creative. She's unironically doing more labor

than most desk jockeys because, like, think about it. Them shits, you got to carry those around. That is back-breaking labor do boobs hurt uh yeah and i have small ones you do not you have beautiful natural breasts why are you lying austin i'm a b i'm a b cup i can't be for buxom think of how big the alphabet is i i i i think your boobs are great i that's is to say? I'm going to kill myself. Ish, you're going to make her.

Live. I should probably cut that on the podcast. No, it's fine. No, Austin. No, it's fine. It's just funny that you don't know what the fuck to say. Because this is the dilemma. You know what?

This is a dilemma that not just gay men face. Gay men, you know? When you want to tell your heterosexual friend she looks nice, it's tough. You could say your penis is small, and I wouldn't be like, no, it's not. Is that offensive to be like, your boobs look great? No, is this measuring tape smaller than this pen? Yes. Okay, then it's just a fact.

My boobs are smaller than hers. Well, no, I just think they're there. I don't think that's a fun comparison. I don't think that's right. No, no, no, hold on. I don't think that's a fun comparison. I don't think that's right. What? Like, oh, no, no, no. Hold on. I know we want to move away from this desperately, but I need to understand what you're trying

to say. So like, so in your mind, you're like, are you saying like we should lie? Why is bigger better? No one said that. Oh, yeah. I didn't say are her boobs better than mine. No one said that. Thank you for pointing that out, by the way.

Yeah, what the fuck? I said they are bigger than mine. They are bigger than yours. Mine are a perfect handful. Hers would take some work out. High five, cutie. Natural and beautiful. Natural, beautiful, beautiful breasts.

I'm going to kill myself. How are you the gay man, and you are way creepier on the titty thing than we are right now? Cutie, ready? Measurements, got you. Mine, off the top of my head i bet i'm the only person who can do this jacket 42 regular oh i need your i know i need your chest yeah so that's the problem because i know i know my suit sizes too okay you know your suit size yes full 44 extra extra long with the arms yeah because my arms are unfortunately

very fucking long fucking Michael Phelps yeah it's really freakish and it shocks tailors all around the world waist is a

37 by 34 in seam shoe size is 13 shirt size is 17 and a half. Extra, extra long, once again. The arms.

And that's it. I think I got everything. Excellent. That's why I said 17 and a half. Good job. We should measure this on the Patreon. Yeah, I'm going to measure you guys on the Patreon. We're going to measure each other on the Patreon.

Our body sizes. Okay. Yeah, what else are we measuring? I bet Austin doesn't even know his jacket size. No, I don't. Yeah. I'm a medium. I am a refined gentleman. Of course I know.

I can even... He's probably the most basic size. I can't afford to say. This is for our calendar, by the way. I bet he's a 39 regular. He is whatever the most average size is. Oh, you want to be... What do you mean?

That's not a bad thing. You fit into everything. I have big breasts. You are built... No. You are built. No. You are designed. You are designed perfectly like a mannequin. Okay.

I'm saying that as nicely as I can. You are an old Navy mannequin. Yeah. Old Navy mannequin. Yeah. Not like a sexy one. At least like American Eagle or something. What?

No. They don't have abs. Do they even have. Old Navy ones have abs. Oh, okay. I'll take that. I'll take that. By the way, current events.

I think we should cover this quickly. We lost a legend this week. Yes. Jimmy motherfucking. Oh, okay. I'll take that. I'll take that. By the way, current events, I think we should cover this quickly. We lost a legend this week. Yes. Jimmy motherfucking Buffett, baby. He's up there in Margaritaville in the sky. He's enjoying a cheeseburger in paradise right now. Hell yeah. It's always sad.

Looking for my lost sugar. 75, surrounded by friends, family, dogs. That's what he said. It's always sad. He's a good dude. What'd he die of? Old. That's what he said. It's always sad. He's a good dude. What'd he die of? Old. That's insensitive.

I don't know that. Vaccine. I don't know. I just said it. Vaccine. The vaccine. Vaccine. Well, he definitely didn't get the shot.

No, he probably did. What do you mean? He's like, he's like. Oh, yeah, he's kind of liberal. Yeah, he's like an old billionaire lib guy. One hundred percent. Most billionaires are liberal, which. Oh.

Oh my gosh. Bummer. Yeah. No vaccine for that one. Let me tell you. Oh my gosh. That's so sad. Yeah.

Wear sunscreen. Yeah, wear sunscreen first. I just... When I see that, when someone passes away at like 76... That's rough. And they've lived like a wonderful life. Like this guy lived, okay?

He did it all. He came, he popped off at a time when you could build an entire franchise off of one hit song. Which he literally did.

And I think he had a restaurant. He still does. Multiple. He has hotels. A casino. I didn't know that. God damn.

Where? All around the country. All across the country. Ted Nivison and Eddie Burback went to every single Margaritaville in the United States of America and also in Canada. This is why I know so much about Jimmy Buffett. I had no idea who the fuck he was before this.

Aw, poor Ted. Ted's probably sad. For his lost shaker salt. Any other current events you guys want to get into? I have, well, we just did the Re uh reconstruct ideology collab yeah pop-up shop i was a little worried that it was going to either be dead no one was going to show up because we had to move it back one week or that it was going to be too much and too hectic and swatting and bomb calls and all that so i was like very deliberately not promoting it too much.

It was low key. Like I did it. They email blasted it to everyone who's like on the email listing for, uh, for, you know, the ideology website. And I like kind of briefly mentioned it a couple of times on stream,

but I didn't really do like a full blown promotion on it at all, especially not on Twitter where all the psychos are. And then it and it was great it was perfect size yeah i i am like your target demographics hassan superfan and i didn't know about it i had to like research it was very ambiguous i didn't know about it yeah and i'm your best friend yeah a lot of us didn't i put it in the group chat my mom wasn't my mom was in town i didn't want to. I begrudgingly showed up. No, you didn't.

You wanted to meet everyone. Yeah, as everyone knows. You love fans more than anybody. Austin called me afterwards because I had to do a meeting with the merch team as well immediately after because I'm never available. And, you know, as you guys know. So they're like, we have you here. We have to sit you down for 35 minutes of your time and like through what we're doing for Q1, Q2, whatever. And while I was doing that, I had to go upstairs

and then come back down to talk to the fans or whatever. Austin was the man, the perfect man, to leave there unattended. He left me. He didn't even tell me. He just threw me into a sea of fans. You hated that. He threw me into a sea of fans, and I threw it down. He calls me after.

He's like, where did you go? I mean, I can't believe you left me there with a sea of adoring fans that I had to talk to for hours and take photos. I gave away a lot of your t-shirts. No, that's great it's awesome yeah gave away a lot of t-shirts i don't know i told everybody i told everybody it's a pop-up shop i told everybody i said theft is encouraged i i i don't care i like it did you buy did you sell a lot of shirts i have no idea oh i don't care i i he doesn't care how is that weird

I don't want the way I see apparel merchandising is specifically something that people want that's why my margins are like dog water in comparison to like anyone else but I don't care

I want to well they do actually because they still get a cut in comparison to like anyone else. But I don't care. I want to. That merch company loves you. I want to. Well, they do actually, because they still get a cut. They don't give a shit. Yeah, they get their cut. I'm talking about my margins in particular. Oh, that's the end of it.

Yeah. And ultimately, I don't really care about the amount of money that it generates. I care that like people like it. It's a good quality. Hasanabi fans, very dripped out. Yeah. A lot of times. I care that like people like it. It's a good quality product. Hasanabi fans, very dripped out a lot of times.

I believe it. Yeah. Very tall too. We're going to have Tana on an episode someday. I kind of want to ask her to give me a makeover. Really? We can do that. She's the one who reached out to me.

She could give me such a good makeover. To be on our podcast? Yeah, she was like, I still want to come on. We need to get the I'm over it girls too. Yes. Yes. Yep. The what? I've had it. To be on our podcast? Yeah, she was like I still want to come on. We need to get the I'm over it girls too. Yes. Yes. Yep. The what? I've had it. Yeah. What is that?

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. I've had it. Yeah, I know. They're awesome. We need to get them on. Yeah, someone should be in contact. Also, I reached out and then I kind of connected them and then I did that as well. We're going to have a set soon. No, it's not your fault. I also threw the layup to someone. The Obamas have not returned my email. Oh, he was bad at it. I did that as well. We're going to have a set soon. No, it's not your fault. I also threw the layup to someone. The Obamas have not returned my email.

Oh, he's staring at Marsh. This is really awkward for all of us. Marsh is just... There's a lot of contention. Marsh is just going... He's trying to do that thing where he's like, I'm in a tunnel, and I can't hear you anymore. I would in doubt blame Austin.

But he's next to me. Austin, I can't believe you didn't keep up with him. I lost. Nobody connected. For who? Nobody connected me. I don't know. With what?

No, she's. It's your fault. I can't believe it. I knew it. God damn it. Fucking Austin. Look, I lost Michelle Obama. We really were getting close with that one.

What? Oh. No. I need someone to challenge i need like a bet i need a bet so i can work out i have no motivation to work out and none of my clothes are fitting and i'm cutie dude yes yes body off body off how do we do that i'll tell you we're gonna get naked you said no no no i'll tell you i'll podcast. I'll tell you. Uh-huh. We set a date. Uh-huh.

Okay? Uh-huh. We sit you on top of an old washing machine. That's enjoyable. And then everything that jiggles, we draw a Sharpie over. No, that's old sorority shit. That's old sorority shit. Oh, my God.

I've never heard that in my life. That's some eating disorder. That's straight eating disorder shit. So sad. Yeah. This is what I did to work out to get motivated. Wait, Will was talking, you asshole. Oh, I'm so sorry.

Hey, fuck yourself. I'm so sorry. Will, I saw him interrupt you first, and then I forgot. Yes, I'm interrupted frequently. I'm so sorry. Will, you're beautiful and natural. I love you. Thank you.

Set a date on the calendar. Three of us. Y'all have to appear somewhere basically shirtless. You can obviously wear the boob coverings. For the calendar. For the calendar shoot. For the calendar. But we make it a competition where people vote on whose body looks the best.

No, that's terrible. Yes. No, no, no. We can't do that. You need the wrathful vengeance. No, no. We can't do that. We can't do that.

Why don't we do a body pop-up? You guys already have better. You guys are already much chiseled. No, that's not true. I'm not. And also, Cutie will literally die if that's the case. We can't do that. We can't do that. Why don't we do a body pop-up? You guys already have better, you guys are already much chiseled. No, that's not true. I'm not. And also, Cutie will literally die if that's the case.

We can't do that. I will die. She will die leading up to the event. Listen, here's the other thing. I'll just stop eating. Cutie, Cutie. That's why I said you will die. I have unlimited gas passes at my gym.

Uh-huh. I'm working out with famous gay porn stars recently. Yeah. Famous gay Hasanabi heads. Yes. To make champagne. Austin show fans at first but well

is that is that the case they just they they don't get as much me but anyway i have unlimited guest passes come with me every day i'll turn you into a fucking machine he's gonna murder you i'll turn you into a freak i'm like tired yeah in the morning if you can work out in the mornings you can come train with my trainers I usually will work out around 2pm I work out around 8am can I can I tell

I'm gonna load you full of pre-workout I'm gonna put you on a booty boot camp bro her anxiety I'm gonna turn you into a freak I'm gonna have you

looking like a Kardashian you can't have her you can't have her take pre-workout booty boot camp she's already hypochondriac incredibly anxious now when your skin is itching yeah you'll know that you have

to lift weights the first time she starts feeling the burn from like uh is it l-carnitine i don't know the first time she has that like face burn and the nerve tingle she's gonna be like oh i'm dying i'll have to go to a hospital you give me two months i I'm going to turn you into a CrossFit athlete. Booty boot camp is kind of scary. Don't do it. Wrong booty boot camp. What? Booty boot camp.

Oh. Anyway, that's all. I'm trying to do 10K steps. What are the areas that you want to improve? I would like to lose 20 pounds. From what? My tummy. You don't have 20 pounds to lose. Yeah, I do. I gained 20 pounds to lose. Yeah, I do.

I gained 20 pounds with COVID. It doesn't matter. Where is the 20 pounds coming from? My tummy. There's not 20 pounds in your tummy to lose. Twummy. Do you guys know how much money I've made off of my Ozempic stock? That's where the eating disorder girlies thrived.

We saw that and we were like. Ozempic is going crazy. A lot of my friends are on Ozempved. We saw that and we were like. He's going crazy. A lot of my friends are on Ozempic. Really? Is it working? Yeah. It's actually a terrifying prospect. One, because it might have actual.

It might actually work. It might have links to thyroid cancer, potentially. It has. Don't tell. I'm going to sell. Just live it. It'll kill you. Okay.

That's number one. Dude, I am the king of eating disorder information. Okay, let me tell you something. Trigger warning, everybody. Trigger warning. Ozempic is actually seen, it's hailed as like a miracle drug for weight loss. The thing is, it is a major appetite suppressant. The other one is, what is it, Ogoi or something?

Meth. The other one, it's just two. Yeah, it's like Go Away, but it's just two they're uh yeah it's like go away it's like go we yeah well regardless originally i think it's like uh utilized for uh people who are diabetic now it is uh i think it's fda approved for yeah for weight loss for weight loss uh it's actually uh being held as a miracle drug the problem is this. It is an appetite suppressant. It will stop you from eating,

which is the quickest way to lose weight, okay, when you're not hungry ever, and you just kind of eat. I have to let our designer out. You only eat to survive. However. March the letter up. Okay.

However, a major issue. Give her this later. However, a major issue. However, a major issue with Ozempic is that when you are done or when you, let's say there's a shortage or something and you can't take it, your appetite quadruples when you're off of it. So you have to take it permanently for the rest of your life. Oh, really? And if you don't take it permanently for the rest of your life and you're off of it, your weight doesn't just yo-yo. You literally eat so much more that you end up gaining

a tremendous amount of weight. How do you know this? Because I... My friends on NoZapBag looks foul. Yeah, no, you will... I'm going to keep it a buck. They look great. There's another issue with it as well

because, like, people were saying, I don't know if this is a meme or not, but, like, it actually, like... Once your appetite comes back. It's straight up melting, like, fat particles off your face even. Like, your buccal fat even goes away. Yeah, but. Which makes you look like heroin chic, which is very hot right now.

Wait, so could I take this? Yes. No, dude. What are you wrong? What's wrong with you? I mean, honestly, I could use a cup. I love how he's like the angel and I'm like the devil. No, dog.

You can't. You should not take it. You can definitely take it. You don't need any medication. Dude, I'm like the devil. No, dog. You can't. You should not take it. You don't need any medication. Dude, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude. Especially at your... No, you won't. You will look older. If you lose your...

Yes, skinny gays are definitely taking this. Homosexuals in West Hollywood have been taking it for years. You look so gone. Really? Oh, so gone. Dude, dude, no. Your cheeks will look like you're on heroin. I was going to say, I bet homosexuals were the test subjects for this.

Yes. Wait, how do they know that it's linked to thyroid cancer? What do you mean? You can't just release a drug without actually having long-term studies. Oh, has there been long-term studies? Yeah, the thyroid cancer is on animals. So metabolically speaking, it might be a little different from human beings, so we don't know yet, but

there's a likelihood. Okay, thank you. Can I see, will you pull up an Ozempic before and after picture? I don't even know where he's going. He had to pee. No. I gotta pee. He's leaving the house. Oh. I don't know what's happening. He's bringing us cupcakes.

How exciting. he's getting me wait really right after we talked about fucking ozempic I'm not trying to eat right now I don't think he's now we all have eating disorders great

I okay so this is how I got fit I hired a chef yeah yeah it's great it's a it's genuinely a miracle drug you want to know why

because the quickest way to lose weight is to not eat and if you the quickest way to lose weight is to not eat and if you don't eat you lose weight it's magic here's the thing when you the thing is oh my god it's important that is crazy it's important not to starve yourself don't even think about it don't even think about it do not even fucking think about it it's important not to starve yourself because when you starve yourself you at your body uh actually you slow your metabolism down you don't want to do

that you want to feed your body small protein rich meals throughout the day okay that's also only marginally improving your your resting metabolic rate as long as you hit your as long as depending on your dietary needs if you're trying to lose weight you have to be at a deficit if you want to gain weight you have to be at a if you have to have a surplus. Here's the thing. Here is the thing. If your dietary needs require you to take in, let's say, you know, 150 grams of protein and like 2,000 calories a day, then as long as you hit that, you're good for the most part.

Calories in, calories out. I'm going to get on Ozempic. Ozempic helps you definitely reach those. I don't like the thyroid tumors. That sucks. Wait, did you look up the side effects? Yeah. That one is insane. Look at the macros on that.

It's so good. Why would you say that to me? We're the same. Now that we heard about thyroid cancer, we think we have it. That's what I'm saying. Thyroid C cell tumors. Most common ozempic side effects are nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, abdominal pain, and constipation. Those are fine. Serious ozempic side effects include allergic reaction changes.

Are you okay with those? Do you have them? And looking great. Yeah. Ozempic has an FDA box warning for the risk of thyroid C cell tumors. But everyone should still invest in them. What? I don't want my stock to go down after this episode.

Is that the that a trading? It's not financial advice. This is not financial advice. Speaking of financial advice, random, I thought maybe, should I put a disclaimer before my Karen,

white hat Karen segments that this is not like legal advice? Just say this is entertainment. I think many people will immediately know that you are not a lawyer. He's a lawyer. You never know.

You never know. Sorry. I don't think anyone is going to mistake you for a lawyer. Well, I'm doing White Hat Karens on the Patreon. Did we upload the first episode? Wednesday. Okay, first episode is Wednesday. Nice.

I did record it. Pickup time is on Friday. Guys, look at us. Current events. Yes, we're doing it all. The Patreon is thriving. Yeah. thriving it's doing so well we are recording so many things and uploading so many things it's being a current event this fucking fly is gonna kill it yeah the reason why there's a lot of flies it actually ties into what i was gonna say is my parents are here and

when my parents are here they leave the doors open all the time, literally nonstop every single day. And I tell them all the time, please close the doors, please close the doors, please close the doors. To which they say, yeah, sure, we'll definitely close doors. They never do. Flies galore. Okay, they're eating good. Another thing I wanted to talk about with respect to current events, at least, is that my parents are now officially at the age where they just like tell me things that they read in the news and they want me to like do something about it where they're like come on you know um earlier

today uh my dad is like there's a there's this this thing it's called the sphinx did you hear about this this is like the the greatest accomplishment in entertainment it's called the sphinx did you hear about this this is like the the greatest accomplishment in entertainment it's a marvel and i was like uh i don't know what you're talking about but i assume are you talking about the sphere in vegas is like no it's in los angeles is cool yeah he's like no no it's in las vegas it's in los angeles i'm like okay well i'm trying to google it and he's like trying to spell it and i can't he's not spelling it correctly and i'm like getting flustered and frustrated i'm like dad i don't think i think you're talking about the and he's like trying to spell it and I can't, he's not spelling it correctly. And I'm like getting flustered and frustrated. I'm like, dad,

I don't think, I think you're talking about the sphere. He's like, no, no, no, no, no.

You don't know what you're talking about. And then he starts being like, the fact that you don't know what this is, is alarming to me. And I'm like, okay, all right, well,

whatever. And then we finally find out I was right. It's the Las Vegas sphere. Okay. And I was like, dad, I knew about this already. And he's like,

well, it's still a big deal and you should talk about it and I'm like wait why is it a big deal have you seen it yeah but like why are we mad it's not no it's a big deal for him he just thinks it's cool oh he thinks it's cool he just thinks he's cool he was like frustrated that he I that I didn't know and then my's like, you know what you really should talk about is this, uh, lesbian Turkish volleyball, uh, you know, team captain or whatever. They're, uh,

currently winning. I agreed with her. They're, they're currently winning. And like, it's a big controversy and you should tweet about it to like, show support. It would be a very,

it would be very important for you to show support, which I'm like, sure. Like, that's fine. I could do that. Uh, I'll read into it a little bit more.

And like, now she's pestering me. She's like, have you tweeted about the lesbian? She's like, when are you going to support the lesbians? Yeah. Yeah. Your mom's a bigger ally than you are. Yeah, for sure. My point is.

She's going to the Abbey with me later. No, she's not. Is she? Yeah. No, of course not. We're going clubbing. I believe him. Mm-hmm.

Thank you. Never trust him. He is a deceptive person. It is in his nature as a homosexual man and Lebanese. That's why Lebanese people are deceptive. No, I was just making a joke. All right. Anyway, that's where that's where I'm at.

I don't know. I was wondering if you guys have similar experience. I mean, my dad just wants money. Really? And I'm like, yeah, dad, you can have it. it wait he wants money but we're broke in a nice way how do you mean what do you cutie and i are broke we're broke come here to your bitch ass subscribe to the patreon yeah subscribe to the page uh no and i say he wants money my is very funny. He's my dad is a. He's a very he's a self-made man. He came from a frickin farm.

And yeah, brother, he he owns a landscaping company and he's still out there every day in this hot sun landscape. Scape and land. Bowen. Yeah, he does it all in the winter. He plows. Does he like people? I don't think they're his preference. That's why there's no way you're out in the farm. He's a Mormon man. Yeah. Does he like gay people? I don't think they're his preference.

There's no way you're out in the farm your entire life. Yeah, he's a very Mormon. He's praying for me, for sure. He is praying for you and me. We're on the list at the temple for prayers. Yeah, we're for sure. But after we die, we're getting converted. Yeah, they'll baptize for us. For sure.

We'll be saved. But he's a bit of a landlord, but he's what do you mean a bit my dad is not a good landlord is what i have learned dad i'm he doesn't watch this dad anyone in my family watches it my dad what do you mean i thought awesome show he's big awesome fan yeah he is notoriously more famous than cookie monster he he calls me the other day and he's like, I can't get any bookings on my Airbnb. And I was like, Dad, that's because it's gross. Oh, no, he's an Airbnb landlord? Yeah.

That is the worst. Come on. I know. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I thought about starting up an Airbnb. Oh, don't do that. Please don't do that, guys.

It is like the most parasitic, vulturous aspect of already a parasitic. What if I started Airbnb-ing out your rooms? Do you think he'd even notice if I was just like, hey, I got a friend coming over. They're going to be there, and I'll be there later. And I'd just never show up, and I'm just Airbnb-ing out. I think I would notice that. Airbnb-ing out.

You say they're your dates, and you walk them in, give them a tour, and then leave them there. You're like, just say we're dating. Yeah, I give you a lot of leeway, but I think that would be something that i would not be comfortable with we can make a lot of money i know sorry i interrupted um a lot of people make it seem like like there's a there's a get rich quick trick out there yes if you already have a lot of money it is very easy to continue making money off of that money the entire system is designed in this way. I just refuse to do those things.

And you guys should as well because you already have a lot of money. And, you know, there's more ethical ways. I'm opening up a child sweatshop. Child sweatshop. That part is fine because the children. For the Therian merch. The children yearn for the mines. They yearn for the mines.

They need something to do. These kids, when I see their beautiful eyes after they've sewn their hands into a garment and I'm pulling the stitches out, there's real satisfaction there. They're happy. You know what? I'm happy. You can't work there. No, I'm not working there.

I'm not going to work there. I'm going to be there. You don't want to work there. He wants to invest. I want to invest. Big time. I'm not working there I'm not gonna work there I'm gonna be big you don't wanna work there he wants to invest I wanna invest big time like I'm not a capitalist but my dad

my dad calls me and I tell him that his Airbnb is ugly and then it goes from me telling him his Airbnb is ugly to now me redesigning his entire Airbnb

so it can be pretty you gotta get some profit off of that no I love him aww you're so sweet I still do his like invoices and contracts

yeah I know. I remember. That's insane. What? You don't remember this? Yeah. Wait. Yes.

Right. You're not an attorney. What the hell do you. You don't have to be an attorney to do invoicing. What? Oh, I think you did contracts. Yeah. Well, I'll send his contracts for his.

Judy, I need you to do more in my life. What? You want me to redesign your Airbnb? Yeah. I'm gonna need you to step it up and help me you want me to redesign your airbnb yeah i'm gonna need you to step it up and help me with my organism actually yeah you're right what the fuck where's our shit i tried to decorate your house and you were too difficult of a client okay first of all uh you're right about that wait wait wait what he was i never was told that he was too we wanted to make like uh we wanted to make content out of it, and it was a terrible decision. It was too much. What happened? He is annoying.

No, she just quit. She just quit. That's what it was. I did quit. But why did she quit? Because he's so indecisive. No, he's just unresponsive. No, no, no.

He was indecisive, and it was farmed for content, and it was draining me. Yeah, I was just like, whatever. Don't worry about it. I'll figure it out. I was tired. His house looks good. Also, I would redo the kitchen. No, your kitchen's

fine. I don't like the acrylic cabinets. It's nice. It's not my style. He's farmhouse. I like modern farmhouse. He wants to be on the farm. In the middle of West Hollywood?

It's a beautiful There's not even a single tree around. It's a beautiful aesthetic if you're into this modern contemporary bullshit. I like farmhouse. It's mid-century He didn't ask for this feedback. I don't know if this is mid-century.

You like mid-century. The house is not mid-century. Not this. This is like very 90s. I want like a full-blown brutalist house. Oh, you want like minimalist? Yeah, I want like all glass. No, the worst? Yes, you like mid-century modern.

No, I like brutalist. No, that's not mid-century modern. The house you showed me out in the woods was mid-century modern. The one that you were talking, I was watching the woods was mid-century modern. The one that you were talking, I was watching your stream. Mid-century modern. Oh, no. I liked it. I liked that he had a parasocial moment where he was like, the house you showed me.

Austin, that was awesome. You showed me. The full front of that house was glass. Okay, you know what? Maybe I don't know what I'm talking about. You don't know what you're talking about. That sounds like modern. All I know is modern farmhouse.

Scott. He knows what he likes. Yes, I know what you're talking about that sounds like modern um all i know is modern farmhouse scott yes i know uh scott disick has the funniest architectural digest in the entire world because the home itself is very like um contemporary cozy but then he clearly if he hired a design team they need to be fired but he wanted modern so badly that it's just like this empty room that has paneling, which is very contemporary. And then just like a solid statue. I like that. That's farmhouse. No, the outside, you could say it's farmhouse. Oh, I love that. Keep scrolling.

I love that. Oh, that's. No, it's. Gaudy. No, go to the. Is that Gaudy? Go to the YouTube video. See, I like this.

No, you don't like this. I promise. You do not like this. Like, I don't like browns. I don't like browns. Like, this is like a light brown. I don't like this floor. It's not my house.

He's talking about colors. Okay, just kind of click through. Let me make sure this is the right one. He's done a few. Oh. Oh. Oh. I like that. I don't like that.

I like this. Are you kidding me? No. He has the weirdest design. Really? That's kind of weird. That's awesome. I like...

See, look. How does Scott Disick have so much money? He has like... I don't know. None of that makes any sense. This is ugly. It's all really ugly. Yeah.

And that table, that table, you could call that table mid-century modern, but like then the rest of the house is like, what is that? What's going on over there? Why do we just have a modern light right there? How does Scott Disick have so much money? And he has no art on the walls. He's got nothing. It's very, it's very weird.

I like this view though. I think the only reason why he has so much money is because he's just a Kardashian. Look at that. The shelves with the towels is so funny. What the fuck is up with these towels, man? Here, see if you can find the house I was looking at. Type in waterfall house. Ooh.

Yeah. I feel like that's... Oh, is it the Frank Lloyd one? No, it's the fucking... Oh, I love... Have you one? No, it's the Frank Lloyd. Oh, I love. Have you guys ever heard of the murder house? This house had me bricked up. Wait, let me guess something. Wait, pause before we get in.

This is so. Does it have a sunken living room? Does it have a sunken living room? I don't think so, no. I fucking love that shit. You love sunken living rooms? I think it's sick. That's so funny.

Well, the original, actually the original set design in a bigger space was a sunken living rooms? I think it's sick. That's so funny. Well, the original, actually the original set design in a bigger space was a sunken living room, but we don't have the space for it. Take a look and tell me what you think of this house, because this would be my shit. This is giving Parasite a little bit. You gotta look in the living room. He's like, yeah, right there.

Look at this. Look at it. Wow. I see. So that's brutalist? Wait, what's up with the brick? Exposed brick right there? I'm feeling. I thought there was mid-century modern. That's not mid-century modern. Oh, that's not. I don't know why I keep trying.

I like the tile. That chair could be a little mid-century modern. That's not. The rest of it isn't. All right. It's very like industrial But like cozy It's a man made waterfall That's so pretty

Man made waterfall Man made quarry Where is this? New York New York Wow Upstate Would you live there?

Oh in a heartbeat How much is it? All mine Wow Jesus Christ dude We can't afford it as a family No 12 million and that far out in the fucking boonies dude Jesus Christ We can't afford it as a family No 12 million and that far out

Let's make that our boonies Patreon goal buy this house Wow 20,000 patrons Okay what are we doing Austin's gonna suck his own dick 20,000 patrons I said I would say the F slur On the Patreon.

Well, you have. You did say it. No, I didn't. Shut up. Shut up. In the beginning of this episode. Oh, I did. It got cut out and I didn't say it.

Yeah. Like, literally, we wouldn't have been able to publish the episode because it would be demonetized. Fake news. That's how he had it locked in the chamber. Any other news going around that we want to talk about? Oh, my God, can we talk shit for five seconds? Let's talk that shit.

I'm talking shit. What the fuck is going on? It's a double. Do I want to talk shit or do I want to talk drama? We got time. Save one for the Patreon. I do have some current events related to drama, related to

drama, and related to shit talking let's shit talk first and then drama later let's let Cutie on burden herself talk shit talk your shit tell us what the topics are

we'll select one of them okay either that Jacksepticeye and Mr. Beast that is the drama or the talking shit is this creator fun GG or whatever.

Okay, both are very good. Both are very good. Talk about shit. Talk about shit. Okay, okay. Talk about shit. Jacksepticeye is what we're going to do. And then I have another thing as well.

Starfield. We'll do a little longer episode. Starfield pronoun. Oh, we talking shit. Yeah, we talking that good shit. Drama. Okay, we'll save some of it for the Patreon. We're also going to measure each other on the Patreon.

Yeah, we're going to measure each other on the Patreon. Measure each other's bodies. Make a pact to lose weight. You were way too ready for that. Okay, that's a little, that's crazy. I mean, he told me to get my cock out. Yeah, so patreon.com slash fear and we're almost at 20,000 subscribers. We're going to do that.

Start. Let's go. Jacksepticeye versus MrBeast 20,000 subscribers. We're going to do that. Start. I'll do it. Let's go. Jacksepticeye versus MrBeast. Pull it up. And MrBeast drama. So Jacksepticeye. Dexter to Knox. No, he goes on.

He goes on. Jacksepticeye does a lie detector test with Tommy in it. You love Tommy. Love Tommy in it. Please look up Dexter. Tell me on my show. Well, this has to be like teed up. It has to be teed up in some way.

No, not that. Because during this lie detector thing, Tommy in it says directly to Jack Septickei, do you hate Mr. Beast? We can show the video real quick. That's not the video. There's an older one. This is after it was settled. Okay.

Pull back. Go back to Dick Sertanox's main page. Mansplaining again. Because I have to do it. It's right there. Thank you. I told him and he's like, no, I'm not going to go there.

You guys need to go to therapy. He's like, no. They need to go to Keppel's therapy. He's like, no. I'm going to go to Sertanox's page. I'm like, go to Dick Sertanox's. Okay, anyway. Play the video.

Let's watch this clip. Now Jack, a completely unrelated question. Do you like Mr. Beast? Oh, do you like Mr. Beast? No. Jack. I can't say that.

Do you think Mr. Beast ruined YouTube? Yes. Now in all honesty, Jack, why? Because it became more about views, money, and popularity than it did about having fun. You just don't think you had fun playing Squid Games? You don't think you had fun riding on yachts?

If he had- Building wells in Africa? I don't know. If he had fun doing those videos, they'd be longer. We'd see the fun. Ooh. Ooh. I thought you were gonna get me with that one, didn't you? Who's the YouTuber you hate the most?

I don't know. There's a lot of groomers and pedophiles on our list. That part was funny. So that's what he said. And then it doesn't end there. This is posted on Twitter, to which MrBeast wrote a long-ass Twitter blue answer to. He said,

So I ruined YouTube because I didn't buy a mansion and sports cars. Instead, reinvested my dollars into making content slash focused on doing good and inspiring kids to help people. If you had fun, the videos would be longer. What does that even mean, lol? You think I'd give up every hour of my life for 14 years if I didn't have fun? Skull emoji. This clip is insanely disrespectful in my opinion.

Obviously, there's so much I could say about his content, but I'll just take the punches and be the bigger man. Sigh. Of course, this unfolded into a much larger controversy because whenever this kind of stuff happens, especially if you are one of the biggest content creators and MrBeast is,

he's seen as a demigod, right? There are a lot of people that have demigod right um there are a lot of people that have negative opinions of him and there are a lot of people who want to defend him so uh people that wanted to unload onto mr beast immediately started being like jacksepticeye is right and he's based and you should say it and people that wanted to defend mr beast were like what the fuck is jacksepticeye talking about he He makes Let's Play videos. It's quite literally the bottom of the barrel of content. Now. I like them both.

I was going to say the same thing. Wow, how brave of both of you. No, no, no. I think that there's, no, no. I like them both. I know them both. And I talk to them both. I don't know them both.

I lost money to Mr. Beast one time. I will say this. Okay. There is ironically, in my my opinion truth to what jack septic guy is saying and truth to what mr beast is saying the way i think about this is jack septic guy is not wrong mr beast has been able to change the game there are so many clones out there jimmy himself would agree to this he has even tweeted about it and has said i fucking hate that like so many people are just straight ripping what i'm doing and not even like trying to push the

boundaries or trying to make anything else creative around the product and basically repackaging old mr b's videos right so there is truth to that so he i think there is even internal recognition of the reality that like a lot of YouTube is just about maxing out the algo and maxing out the eyeballs. Okay. But I think that's how entertainment works in general. There's always going to be the unique channels. The thing I would say is like, I agree with that, but Mr. Beast didn't do that. It's always been like that.

It's been like that forever. My favorite YouTube creators are people who you will never know on a name basis. Every frame of painting. No, my favorite YouTube, close, but BreadSword is my favorite YouTuber. And I think he's like horrifically underrated in terms of like his video essays. He'll do three hour long video essays on like obscure media content. And he puts his fucking soul into this shit. CJ the Champ is another good one.

I think that like does anime-related essay content. But I think this is true, like what you're getting to in any medium. I think this is true in film. I think this is true in music, where usually there's like, listen, the way I describe it is this. It is the one-piece conundrum, right?

Where there is fine dining and there's fast food. Where is fast food bad no it's satisfying it's filling it's consistent and a lot of people actually prefer that to fine dining because it doesn't challenge your palate but if you really want to talk about the quality of something is the quality of something how many people consume it or is it how like how much care and art goes into construction because if it's how many people consume it well then fast food is the is the right best food there is in the world but if it is the artistry that goes into it it is quite another thing it's a michelin restaurant and this also

comes back to content creation so i don't know i just i don't think jack septica's comment is fair in that like this is a new mr beast world we're're living in. That's why I said I also agree with Jimmy on that other aspect, which is like this has always been the case in entertainment in every single medium. And for that reason, like I don't fault Mr. Beast for making inoffensive, maxed out algorithm-focused content because like he very openly admits that that's his goal his goal is to like the only thing he cares about is just like making more videos that reach a broader audience

and as long as he stays on like a relatively positive message like he's not fucking running around being like like a violent goober or i mean he genuinely does give back yeah a lot doing like fucking over people pranks or whatever that other people used to do in earlier eras of YouTube. I'm perfectly content with what he's doing and I think it's great. But because of the philanthropic nature of his content, a lot of people do put him up as like a godlike figure almost. And it's not his fault. But people do have like this outsized like insane opinion over him in either direction. And I think both are wrong. I'm a big Mr. Beast fan. And his videos lately have been insane.

I mean, he always popped off as Mr. Beast. But lately, I mean, like they just released a video yesterday where he crushed a 7-Eleven with, like, started with a little domino into a massive domino, and they crushed a 7-Eleven. It wasn't a real 7-Eleven. Well, they built it. I mean, it was very obvious that it was. That was mean.

He was happy. It wasn't a real 7-Eleven? Take it back. You are literally, like, are you in the are you in the 13 year old demographic it was definitely a real building no it wasn't it was a set listen i love what i'll say this i i love what i love no way i love both men hopefully they can move past the beef they did there's one other thing i would like to talk about while we have cutie before we get to the paywall the streamies sucked dude the streamies oh i i unfortunately could not attend i mean i hassan why would you say that i was telling

everyone i was like yeah his son's such a good friend he didn't go out of solidarity i will during a fucking commercial break don't matter i i enjoy enjoy events like that because I get to see so many people that I never see that come from all around the country, sometimes all around the world. I will stand by it.

You didn't go because you were tired. I didn't go because I was feeling like absolute dark. I just went to sleep. He was a little tired. A little tired.

They can't have loved it too much. Hey, they gave you an award during a commercial break and Ethan walked out. Yeah. Ethan also lost and also lost to Jay Shetty

and lost during a commercial break. I'm going to stand by the fact that I think it's just clout wars. Genuinely, I think. What do you mean? Which that's not how, for the record, I know. It's an award show. Yeah. I know, but that's not how streamer,

streamer awards is actually pretty balanced. Well, the reason why streamer awards is balanced, and I think this is a major problem with the streamies in general. Because I fucking hook my blood source up to this fucking community and I let it pump. Because you're a fucking streamer. And because you have an understanding of how the environment works. You're not Dick Clark Productions. No disrespect to the Dick Clark boys out there.

I know some of them. They're so rich, though. Amir. Amir. You remember Amir from the Young Tigers? I used to love him. Yeah, I think he used to work for them. He still does, I think.

Next stream rewards. All I ask for my undying loyalty. I think it's time I worked the red carpet for you. Yeah, we want to work the red carpet. Yeah, we'd like to work the red carpet. Look, I don't hate to get in on that, but... We just shook, so this is awkward. I wanted to be in the red carpet, too,

but you know what, Will? I don't want to be the red carpet, so it's fine. You already did it. No, he's doing the red carpet. No, no, no. Wait, he's doing it again? It's fine. Yeah, he's going to do it.

I just don't... We're going to be a team. I'll have to consider that. Fear and Streamy's red carpet? Yes. You just called it the Streamys again that fear and streamies red carpet yes you just called it the streamies again or streamer awards red carpet all right we gotta do an outfit police let me open let me open the show at least on camera this time fair i mean i mean i would like to do something bigger than that but like you are such a slut it's not even funny i can let you open the show

on camera okay but maybe a little bit of a bigger. Listen. I want to do something. Maybe if you don't wear a smelly shirt this time. We'll let you. We'll let the people see you. I would like to host a show with you, but I'm not a woman. Can I tell you what I think Austin would be really good at? He would also be good at red carpet. In the show, you have breaks.

I think instead of just having the camera crew walk around the audience, he should walk around and he should be the one who talks to the people. I actually. You know what? You know how- Fine, I'll do it all. No, I actually, that was my original plan. To do it all? I know.

No, remember? Remember last year I talked to you about potentially being the talker? The runtime will be eight hours. The floor is air. What are you doing? What happened? Can I tell you what we need to have?

Okay, 30,000 subscribers on the Patreon. This is what I want. This is what I need more than anything in my life. Austin's show hosts a children's beauty pageant. Austin's cuties would go fucking insane. We have a $100,000 budget and prize, and we do a children's beauty pageant. I would get canceled so hard.

And Austin goes up there and goes, there they are, Austin's cuties. No, we can't do that. The worst thing about this, I'm so sorry, Will. I love it so much. But the yard has talked about doing a child's beauty pageant for the past year. And I'm so sad because I know how much you'll hate that. No, no, no, no. Good.

Because I want to steal something of theirs. No, good. They should do it. What are they still of ours? No, they should do it so we can fucking cancel them and call them pedophiles. What do you mean? Yeah. Just cut this part out.

You don't have to cut it, but cut this part out and then fucking let them do it. You should keep gassing. You should keep gassing. You should keep gassing. We've been talking about doing it. Yeah. God, they're good. Yeah, they are good. They always let him do it.

And I let him do it. I got my QAnon people. I'll like, I'll, I'll fucking get them. I'll get them to freak out about it. And then boom, they're called pedophiles. Wait, they're on your side. I have my burner accounts. You know what I mean? I can get, I can get then boom. They're called pedophiles. Wait, they're on your side? We're on top. I have my burner accounts.

You know what I mean? I can get some people on board. Hank Partridge? Yeah. Yeah. 2A Defender. My Second Amendment defends the first. What's the website?

Truthtellereagle.fuck? Truthtellereagle.net. Truthtellereaglefuck.net. Hey, before we go to the Patreon, I have one little announcement. Okay. I've announced the first cast for Name Your Price on tour. Name Your Price. All right. Name Your Price on tour, Miami, Florida,

October 7th will include Quackity, Carl Jacobs, Tommy Inet, and Tina Kitten. What up? And Will. And Will, obviously. I'm there, too, obviously. I said this. Will is the co-host.

He is the host of Name Your Prize. It's okay. You're flying to Miami for this guy? It's okay, man. Cutie, obviously. I just wanted to make sure Will got a spotlight. The contestants and the L.A. show and Houston show also on sale have not been announced. The cast have not been announced.

Did it sell out after you announced the cast? No, not yet. Oh, everyone relax. The tour, the cast have not been announced. Did it sell out after you announced the cast? No, not yet. Oh, everyone relax. Yeah, relax. There's still tickets available. Limited amounts of tickets available in Miami, folks. Believe me, get it while it's hot. All right?

Hot, hot, hot. Hot, hot, hot. Hassan and Cutie still will be on one of the shows. They just don't know. Are we? I never said yes. I've spoken to them about one day. I've never said yes.

Okay. All right. If anybody else wants any other announcements we have, anybody? Anybody? Do you have an announcement to make, Cutie? No. Should I? I mean, if you want to.

Oh, yeah. By the way, guys, thank you. I want to tell our audience, I'm so thankful for my friends because they're all going to be joining me next Monday to watch the Jets. Yes. Jets, Jets, Jets. Yes, because as a group, you're a star. September 11th is a very important date for me.

How did you know that next Monday was September? We talked about it. That was so quick. Well, it's because it's a very important day for me and also the coach of the Jets. Will there be snacks? I think we'll go to a place. I'll rent a place and we'll sit.

If there are snacks well and you of course I will go for you oh yeah I don't think she's coming for you if there are snacks jalopinopop

are we yeah we're filming the podcast next Sunday oh do you guys want to film the podcast while we watch the game I feel like that'll be that'll be audio hell I would love to

because then I could watch the opener with my dad, the Vikings game. Well, he wants to watch the Viking game. You could just miss next week. I may do that, but we'll see. For your dad. No, because we're going to film the podcast Sunday night. Anyway, we're going into the Patreon, folks.

Oh, wait, you have an announcement. No, football starts on Monday, not Sunday. Sunday, but Jets game is Monday. So are we going to have to start filming our podcast on Sunday? They wanted to specifically fly the Jets on 9-11. Oh, boy. Listen, the first Muslim American head coach. Really?

Is going to change the trajectory of the New York Jets. Exciting. This must make you a big Jets fan. What are you laughing? What are you guys laughing about? I don't like that he's laughing. What are you guys laughing about? What do you mean? He's just going to fly the Jets fan Hassan. What are you guys laughing about? I don't like that he's laughing. What are you guys laughing about? What do you mean?

He's just going to fly the Jets. I can't wait for the patriotic ceremony to remember all those that were lost. What is happening? I don't know if you know this, but in 9-11-2001, a horrifying event happened in New York. I would like to take a moment of silence. Hassan. Sorry, you're right. It's natural and beautiful. Oh, my God.

Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you. Thank you so much. Awesome. That was beautiful. It was natural and beautiful.

Fly, Jets, fly. That's right. Okay. That's fly, Eagles, fly. That's Eagles. That's right. Okay. That's fly, Eagles, fly. That's Eagles. That's Eagles. That's J-E-S-T-O-S-E-R-J-E-T-S-E-T-S-E-T-S-E-T. Okay.

All right. Well, see you on the Patreon. We still got a lot of juicy drama to cover. Oh, my God. We're going to be talking about the Starfield gender pronoun wars that are happening. We're measuring each other. We're naring Austin's asshole. I brought the nare.

Let's go. Yeah. Goddamn. I waxed it yesterday. Full butthole. Oh, well, if we get inside, we can get some of those little hairs. Okay, that's true.

They're as thorough as they used to be. When did we agree to this? I don't know, but I'm going along with it. I went to a drive-thru waxing place. What? Yeah. What?

That's not a thing. Yeah, it is. Drive-thru? They come into your car? You just hang your ass out the window? All right, we'll talk more about this on the Patreon, patreon.com slash fear, and we have new tiers and updates.

We've got new tiers and actually stuff on the- Lots of content. See you on the other side. Peace. Bye. It hasn't worked out. Oh, you don't have to take off your shirt for this. You could have put your...

So, okay. I don't know how to do this. Measure. Here, give it to me. I'll do it. Measure around the chest, just under the arms, and across the back of the shoulder. I don't know how to do it either. I like this seat better.

You can move. How often do you have to shave your chest? Underneath the arms. Go underneath the nipple, though. Flick the nipple up. For my viewing pleasure.