Fin vs History - Beers Don’t Hit Women, Italians Do | Prohibition (Part 1)

Episode Date: October 5, 2026

This episode of Fin vs History is brought to you by Surfshark. Secure your privacy with Surfshark! Enter coupon code FVH for an extra 4 months at ⁠surfshark.com/fvh⁠ Welcome to Prohibition: the women are nosy, the children are drunk. Can someone prescribe some whisky?   Prohibition (Part One)   The show for people who like history but don't care what actually happened.  For weekly bonus episodes, ad-free listening and early access to series, become a Truther and sign up to the Patreon ⁠patreon.com/fintaylor Chapters: 00:00 - Scat Man 07:50 - Sitting Duck 10:40 - Surfshark Ad 12:04 - The Siren Call 18:35 - Tom The Tinker 20:57 - Punchbags 25:21 - The Child Drunkard 28:33 - It’s Not A Right 31:58 - The Saloon Smasher 34:58 - All Pints Are Crap 37:05 - The Other Hitler Boy 38:04 - Clueless C*cks Klan 41:46 - Have I Got Booze For You? 43:37 - Weaponised Toe Crushing Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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I'm joined by Horatio Gould. Hello. And we are talking today about American prohibition. When America was Saudi Arabia, when Sharia law ran the United States. probably the only time in history there's been this kind of social engineering experiment. Do you think? Can you think over like a short period of time?

Yeah. I guess maybe like Cromwell's ban of Christmas. I suppose. Similar sort of. Starmer's ban on porn. We are you know that's a social experiment. We are currently living in British prohibition. Oh my God, porn abrition.

Porn abortion. Thank you. So America in the early 20th century bans alcohol. But the story starts much earlier. Yeah. This is the long road. to, I mean, I didn't realize how drunk they were before. Yeah, they're like the drunkest country

in the West, basically. I guess that this makes a lot of sense as to why they're now so stupid. Right. Do you not think? Yeah. We'll get into how much they're drinking before Prohibition. Yeah. America in 1776 throws off the the velvet yoke

of British guidance and immediately sets itself. They say fuck you, mum, actually. It's quite an emo revolution. They do. George Washington is an emo. He slams his door. He says, fuck you, mum.

And we're like, okay. Yeah, you know, we'll let you work out on your own. How does the mother respond? Exactly. Gracefully. Gracefully, I'd say. You know? Was it a success?

It's too early to tell. I think it's definitely, definitely not a success. I mean, in 1776, the long road to, you know, drinking out of sippy cups on casino floors and mobility scooters begins. I guess it's interesting to see where America was built on the ideas of liberty and breaking off from a corrupt monarchy, but it just hasn't really panned out the way I think they thought it would.

Well, much like prohibition, there are unintended consequences to all these things. This is kind of where we're at now. Okay, so the headline is serial poo smearer hunted by cops was last seen wearing thong and creepy mask. Yeah.

What's the image? The image is of... Is exactly what it's described, I think? Fair play. The headlines nailed it. Whoever's on captions has absolutely nailed it. Is this in America, I take it? Yes.

This is an African-American gentleman wearing a fanny pack and some kind of mask that keeps his mouth open. I guess you saw like backless COVID mask. Yes. Almost. Chap. Chaps. An arseless COVID mask. And some kind of hat.

And what's he got in his hand? He got bag to poo in his hand, Charlie? Yeah. He has a dog poo bag, yeah. So he's been terrorising local businesses. They can't find him and he's been smearing his shit on the walls. A hunt is underway for a man who pooed in a bag and smeared it on the walls of a shopping center. Yeah.

So I'm just saying that the kind of grand ideas are the founding fathers. They've not really... They've materialised. Well, I think there's a limit to freedom. And I think this is the... The problem is if you... If anything goes, then this is what America is.

You know? The steady... This doesn't happen in Britain. It doesn't. What is it? Is it possibly like a superhero costume? What's the superhero? Fucking poo smear a man.

Poo guy. Captain Poo. Could be. It could be. Which means that the ideas have worked because he's trying to help people. He's just doing it in the wrong way. How is he helping people?

He doesn't know how to help people. Well, then the ideas haven't worked. He's creating jobs. Yes, but I feel that he's being inspired by negative role models if he thinks that's a superhero. Well, there's such a thing as negative liberty and positive liberty.

Go on. Sorry? Skatman. Skatman. We've got that, fair enough. There's negative liberty and positive liberty. So America is founded

on the idea of negative liberty, which is to protect people from the tyranny of government. Right. And then into the prohibition era, it's about protecting people from the tyranny of monopolies. It's more of positive liberty.

Yeah. But it's the opposite of liberty, the prohibition. It's like so un-American. Well, that's what's fascinating about it. It's kind of this massive... But actually, you would say, I was thinking about last night,

really Reagan marks the end of a sort of 100 years where America is actually trying to intervene in people's lives. Right. But now, I mean, this is... I guess this is the freedom, isn't it? It's just a guy in pants.

pooing in bags and smearing it on shopping centre and water. Listen, we all find shopping centres stressful, okay? For men particularly, there is, there should be a German word for when a man has been in a shopping centre too long. And he wants to smear his well, I've never got to that stage, but I, but I can see... Look at the casual walk.

Look at the confidence in the way he's walking around. It is like he's just doing window shopping. Well, he's an artist. He's a window smearing. But I do find shopping centres stressful. I think they speak to women more than they do men. Sure. And I, you know, I'd say that I'm on his spectrum. Thankfully, I'm not anywhere near him.

But I'd say that like autism, we have the same condition. Yeah. What have you found a German word for Dad in a Shopping Center board? Read that out, please. This is a German word for a dad in a shopping center, so ecstentially numbed and wanting to shit on the walls. Go on, Charlie. Go on.

I'm going to have a German center. Father, Salferben, where drunken swan by shite von Skrag. You've not read that out at all well. You actually speak German. I'm Aenka of Zentrum of Vater's Plein Freundeng by Schazenzendrung

So you're feeling I have that feeling quite a lot That feeling when Yeah Yeah it's not very memeable I'll give it that But you know German memes are difficult

German memes are difficult You know But I quite often have a sense Of Eincalvesendrum vaters Pretténtes van by schaiseendrangerang When I go to Stratford Westfield For example

Yes very much It is hell on earth Thankfully, I would say that I'm a non-offending Einkalfecentrum, Vartes, Ben-Fremtren, or a latent, ein-kampen,

A latent, ein-Kalventrampus from Hoindem's in Berschizenstrand, because I, but I do get a set, do you not, do you relate to that at all? I completely hate shopping centers,

but it's because there are a non-place that fucks up your, there's a deep, it fucks at your humanity deep down. I think so. Because you feel you could be anywhere, you're in a loading bay. It feels like you're in the Matrix immediately.

Yes. There's no specific. or unique features to a shopping centre. It could be literally anywhere. Thankfully in Britain, we have safeguards against the extremes of this. And is that the kind of social pressures? Well, it's just a milder society, isn't it?

We're used to social democracy and we're used to state intervention. Yeah. And we're used to, crucially, a safety net. Yes, and maybe we don't fetish size. Freedom. Freedom. In the same way.

Yeah, it's not like, we get it. Like, liberty is a big part of the British, you know, identity in many ways. we're not screaming it as we chuck up, boo. Everything in moderation. Everything in moderation. Right. American is not doing that.

Sorry to bring it up again, but even Charlie's poo throwing, he's an English poo thrower for sure. It is still done within the privacy of his own bathroom. Whatever you do in your own bathroom. Do you know what I mean? There's still, there's a level of an internal life,

a rich internal life. It's not taking out into the shopping centres. It is in the privacy. It's not in the public square. You know? In Britain, we may be, we have. We respect private life a lot in Britain. We respect hobbies.

You need a license to have a firearm, you know, and you can shoot yourself on your own ground. Yes, fine. But do not take that gun into the public square. A man's bathroom is his castle. Yes. Yep. And what he does in that castle defends his castle, is up to him. From the battlements.

From the battlements. Creating a pulley moat. Close the drawbridge. Go off and bang on the door. Fine. But this is a, yeah, it's a, it is a sort of anomaly, the prohibition era. And it's very funny, the unintended constant. sequences of probation. Now, let's get into how do we get here? How do we get to a country that

bans alcohol for, what was it, about 10 years or so, nine years? So, in 1776, the amount of alcohol that colonists are drinking is absolutely insane. I mean, this is, you know, beer and cider and spirits are much safer to drink than water? But at this point, are they not Brits abroad. Technically. Because up until the Revolutionary War, basically, they are still technically Brits abroad. So imagine an all-inclusive, but there's no water.

And that's what America is. It is a massive Benadorm at this point, technically. And again, you know, if we and we will not live to see Benadorm in 250 years. But it will probably be America. But when it has a Revolutionary War. The Benadorn Revolutionary Wars, the Benadorn War's Independence, you know, the Boston Beer Party.

they will, you know, Benadorn will become, you know, America in all but now. The Boston, yeah, the Benadour Beer Cruise. Yes, exactly. So George Washington himself ran a huge whiskey distillery. And at his farewell party in 1787, he had this insane bar tab where him and 54 guests drank 54 bottles of Madeira wine, 60 bottles of claret, 22 bottles of port, 12 bottles of beer, eight bottles of cider, eight bottles of whiskey, seven bowls. A brandy punch. The most interesting thing about that is the 12 bottles of beer. It's a very small amount of beer.

It's very straight. I don't know where that fits in. Yeah, because you don't normally speak of Session Madeira wine. For sure, no. But any night where you've had 12 bottles of beer, but 54 bottles of Madeira wine. Yeah, what's going on there? Have they been having a lot of dessert?

I mean, yeah, Madeira wine I try and stay away from. But it is such a part of life in early America. it's a form of medicine. I mean, they would prescribe children with whiskey. Whiskey was prescribed for snake bites because supposedly, you know, you get a snake bite and the venom slows your heart right, so they go, well, let's just plow it with whiskey.

Is that why the drink's called a snake bite? It must be something to do with that. So a 17-year-old girl in 1873 was given three pints of whiskey. Pints. Is that on draft? I don't know. After a rattlesnake bite,

her circulation improves. and the doctor believes that the whiskey saved her. Right. Now this is obviously the medicine that Sandro still operates by. He has been bitten by a snake. It's alternative medicine, right? It is alternative medicine.

It's Welsh alternative medicine. Traditional. Traditional Welsh medicine. It's 20 pints, 10 margaritas, three Jaeger bombs. Double park, lovely. This episode of Finn versus History is brought you by our good friends

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While others follow the noise, we follow the money. Learn more at Bloomberg.com. So historians estimate that by 1830, the average American is consuming 7.1 gallons of pure alcohol every year. This is measuring ethanol rather than pints. Right. So the actual alcohol. So the 4% in beer, that would be. It's roughly equivalent to drinking four bottles of spirits every week.

I mean, that's really chucking it back. Yeah. Those are Sandro numbers, to be fair. That's a problematic number. So Sandro is like mid-tier as a normal person in this time of America. That's like baseline. Yes. Yeah.

No, he's in 19th century America, Sandro's a pussy. Right, right, yeah. He's an upstanding citizen. He is. Yeah. He runs a nursery. Give the kids to him. This is a decent man, a man who is clear-headed

enough to look after children. Children start drinking beer. He drives to school bus. Yeah, exactly. Children are drinking beer from around eight years of age. When was your first pint of beer? Do you remember? When was your first pint, mate?

I think... I remember my first pint. I think my first pint was at my mum's 50th when I was 12, maybe, 11. I bet that felt great. Yeah, I got really pissed. Did it taste disgusting? Oh no, my first beer was probably at a friend's house part.

Yeah, it did, yeah. But you're around other men, you have to pretend. You have to just suck it up. Yeah. And then you pretend for two years. And then it starts tasting lovely. You start breaking through. Fasters.

On an orchestra trip to Hong Kong and China, new listeners, I was privately educated. I, on the World Cup final 2006, obviously were eight hours ahead, 3 a.m. in the morning, we stay up and watching it in a hotel room, and we had bought a hundred cans of 2% polar ice, which is a weak Hong Kong beer for the Asian market. And my God, we got trashed on it. Yeah. How old were you?

I would have been 15. 15. And I threw up on Reese Cadman, who was passed out in a bathtub. Sorry about that, Reese, if you're listening. Not spoken to you for about 30 years, but sorry about that. 30 years. On him passed out in the bathtub. Yeah.

Yeah. Toilet was open goal, but I went, nah, fuck it. That's Cadman. Nah. Cadman's getting this. Sitting duck here. So, yeah, they were absolutely plowing through it in the West. This is a frontier society.

This is around the age of the kind of gold rush, I guess. Early 19th century. It's constantly moving. Redden redemption time,ish. Maybe, a bit early, perhaps. They're constantly moving west to the country. It's after the Louisiana purchase. Right.

So there's a lot of the Midwest to expand into. And it's such a part of society that wages are being paid in liquor. Children drinking age eight. I mean, that's, you know, that would be more fun. Play gowns would be more fun if they were actually pissed. You skip teenagehood, don't you? Or like being a child almost. Well, the thing, what they say...

If you go from drinking at eight, you sort of... You become an adult sort of immediately. What's funny is that, you know, they say this is a toddler stage, which kind of ends, you'd say, probably about five. And then people talk of this kind of golden era of being a parent, where it's between like six to sort of 11, where they still have the awe and the innocence, but they can do stuff, they're not as needy.

They're not slamming doors saying, fuck you. But there's before that. Yeah. But if you drink through it, you kind of lose. lose the best bit. Yes, for sure. What is it, Charlie? But then you kind of gain a mate,

like a proper mate. Well, yeah, exactly. That'll be kind of, it's just like a man. A lightweight, though. Yeah. It'd be quite fun to have a side. Like a pissed man.

You find him like grumbling in the kitchen. Yeah. Yeah, your nine-year-old's just hanging out his ass. Yeah. Just nine-year-old in the toilet like this. Just, oh, fuck. Oh. So,

you've got frontier cocktails. Cock ale, which is an English tradition. This is when brewers will take a rooster, skin it, gut it, stomp on its bones. Then they put the smashed raw chicken into a canvas sack with raisins and nutmeg and put it in a cask of ale to ferment for a week. Every culture brings a different thing to their own cuisine and culture to America. You know, it's a melting pot.

The Italians bring, you know, pizza, wine, all this sort of stuff. We bring smashed up chickens in the beer. Stamped on chicken into beer. Yeah. People believe that the chicken's animal proteins made the beer rich and restorative. I mean, I can imagine you falling for such a thing. Yeah. I mean, one-sponsed ad.

I subscribe to olive oil. I mean, I'm not throwing, you know, glass, houses and stones and whatever. But, yeah, the fact that it's like sort of stamped on and crushed down, that's especially barbaric. Is that us trying to make, do the French wine, smashing grapes, stamping on a chicken? Just sort of vaguely looking over the channel and seeing what they're doing. I get it, yeah. You get a chicken.

Chucking it in a can of carling. Now, alcohol is such a part of life that in 1794, Alexander Hamilton, is that the Hamilton of the musical that the gays won't stop going on about. No, I don't want to see it. And surprising straights. Yes, well, that's why I don't want to see it. Yeah. It's gay conversion therapy.

It's straight conversion therapy. It's Hamilton. You go there as a straight man with a mortgage and you come out gay and defaulted on your loan payments. I mean, look what happened to Adam Row. I mean, the poor lad. Look at him. Look at him.

He's now a cowboy, you know? He was a liver puddly and working class man, and he's now a gay cowboy because he saw Hamilton. Okay. You know? You can't risk what happens to you. You can't risk. I can't risk it. It's the siren call from the Odyssey, isn't it?

It is. You have to go blind. So you don't become a gay cowboy. Exactly. I'm just tied to the pillar of the theater. Go. No. You're just desperately trying to go like.

Yeah. I should say that our next episode will be joined by, Jam Marcus A Rasey Lovey Yes A straight man Somehow Klinging on for dear life

I doubt that personally I question that I think he's a bit of a U-boat You know He's underneath straight water He's the most dangerous Yes he is Yeah he's behind enemy lines

And we will be out of him In next episode Which is a tradition I'm going to start doing As we're getting guests on To Out of life Absolutely Absolutely

It's sort of like I'm annoyed that we let Schofield go first I mean, we're going to become the Chris Hansen, but it's just... Who are you here to meet? And he was legal. On the podcast. Who's in the podcast?

I don't know. They were gay. That would be awesome to do that. By the way, we only have gay guests. Consensual adult gay relationships. You capfish them. Who you're doing? Yeah, I'm openly gay.

Oh, I got you. You made it. Yeah. Got you. So anyway, yes. Alexander Hamilton, is he president? He must be. Treasury secretary, because he sets up all the finance stuff.

Right. They made a gay musical about it. the Treasury Secretary. Yeah. Fucking hell. And then they woke it up. Christ. I mean,

where's, like, where's, you know, where's balls, the musical? Where's Brown? Where's Quarteng?

You've got to see Quartang, fucking raiding Liz Truss. I would, yeah. Yeah. I mean, I'd see that rap video. Truss is big bunder

on the front of like a four-corsina. It's twerking or quater. Oh dear. Yeah. Where's Quarteng the musical? I'd watch that. I'd watch that. Because you'd leave straight to it when you went in.

Anyway God bless him God bless Quarteng What's Quateng doing Is Quateng still in Quarting's not good about Quartang still got some ideas Yeah

Yeah Because I think Quartang is quite bitter About how it all went down And he believed Well it was the Deepst day famously He was him and trust were Flummox by the deep state

He's an interesting If I was his career advisor I don't know what Quartang has a lot of options Now because it's a bit A hell Mary situation Like it can't get much worse So I think really

Just throw it I think conspiracy theorists, GB News, what's like, what does Quartan go for now? I don't know. I think male model, I think. Anyway, so, yes, Alexander Hamilton, he is the Treasury Secretary, and he proposes a federal tax on distilled spirits to help reduce the nation's debts, because obviously they're bankrupt because they've left Britain. And so this essentially isolates many rural communities because whiskey was affected their currency.

and so resistance breaks out into a rebellion. There was, rebels were organized under the fictional persona Tom the Tinker to intimidate fence sitters. Oh good. Nothing more intimidating than Tom the Tinker man's coming. Get off that fence. Not the Tinker man. Not Tom the Tinker. So during, so basically they'd have tax collectors in local communities and be nighttime raids where male rebels were cross-dressing, calling themselves Tom the Tinker's

wives. This is very bawdy. Yes. You know, this is clearly a country that has... And what bathrooms

are they using, so I don't know. Well, this is, exactly. This is clearly a country that it doesn't know who it is anymore. You know,

this is 20 years after they left. Oh, let's just cross-dress. Well, hang on. They're working out. They're working out. You should be doing this under our roof still.

So in 1794, thousands of armed farmers gather in Pennsylvania to burn property, openly defying federal authority, and it only gets shut down when George Washington himself, he's president,

leads 13,000 troops into the region to squash the rebellion. So he's actually the only sitting American president to have commanded soldiers in the field. Yeah. Interesting. But it's funny, this period of American history,

you've got to remember there are like, I didn't realize that there's basically no one there. Yeah, there's literally no one there. It's why the American Revolution War isn't actually that. I heard something that, yeah, it's like George Washington had like built like a camp early days and that automatically became the third biggest city in America basically. It's because it's like, there's like 15 people.

Exactly. So when everyone's like, oh, when are you going to do the Revolutionary war? But yeah. The only war shits on it. Yeah. It doesn't have a great narrative either. No, it's not. America's civil war much better, to be fair.

Yeah. But the revolutionary war, it's a bit fucking... I'm still fighting that one. With your plameable. With my plamobile Confederate troops. Yeah. Now, so America is, let's say, it's a wet society. People be drinking.

Right. Okay. However, when industrialization hits the country, suddenly, this heavy drinking culture, starts to become quite dangerous. Injury lawyers for you sort of stuff. Yes, exactly. It becomes a litigious culture immediately.

Alcohol starts to be tied to workplace accidents, violent crime, gambling and prostitution. This is quite an interesting side effect of the industrialisation, is that alcoholism is, at this point, in mid-19th century America, a sort of a male social problem.

Yeah, because women aren't allowed saloons. Women can't, work or they choose not to. They are domestic beings. It seems like women in early America are just punching bags. It's just like it's crazy. Well, listen, this is before boxing bags. Right.

Okay. This is before, you know, gyms. Yes, it's very easy with, you know, modern, you know, amenities. It is. You go to a gym now and you see a punch bag. Oh, brilliant. Okay. Yeah, but they didn't have that.

My wife can stay at home. So women, basically, prohibition kind of becomes a woman's issue. Yeah. Because men are coming, men have got these. It's quite suffragetti actually a lot. Well, sadly, viewers, suffrage comes into the story. This issue that will not die, this political cockroach that won't go away. Women's suffrage.

Yeah, the question of the age, you'd say right now. Today's age, still, I'm still fighting this, you know. Why? The issue of today. The issue of today, women's suffrage. I'm writing into my MP. Nothing's more divisive. How are you a woman?

So, yeah, basically women's life in America, you're right, they're essentially punch bags, their husbands go to work in factories and they drink, you know, whiskey basically for breakfast throughout the day. And the money they make in the factory, the women can't make because they can't work, it's meant for them and their child they spend in the salon getting drunk. And then they come back and then punch them. Yes, allegedly. So imagine being at home, you can't work, you send your husband out to get money for your family.

he brings no money back but punches in the face. You get paid. What he brings to the table is a knuckle sandwich. That's what you're getting. Yes, exactly. That's the payment. What's for dinner? Knuckle sandwich again.

Right, brilliant. And obviously, this is a huge time of immigration. Yeah. So, and, you know, Germans have arrived. They brought their beer. Italians have brought their wine. The Irish bring their whiskey. So quite quickly, you know, this masculine immigrant.

That's a domestic abuse triangle. Well, it is. The Germans Italians and America, that's the domestic abuse alliance. And this is the great thing of prohibition in that they're kind of pinning this all on booze. So you know how you say guns don't kill people, rappers do? Beer doesn't hit women. Italians do. Right.

They basically think it's all the beer. Right. When it's like, no, no, these people are Mediterranean. You've misunderstood domestic violence. Yeah. It's a cultural phenomenon. You're actually, if they're not drunk, their aim will be better. So to be honest, it dolls the Italians own.

Exactly. You know? It saves the kids. So, you know, unintended consequences. Yeah. Anyway. You just give yourself a head start. You do.

These social hubs, these saloons, which are quite often heart, like, sort of center of communities for immigrants. Yeah. They were banks, you know, they'd help people who just get off the boat. Where would the women hang out? Are they just at home? I think they're just sitting at home. They're knocking about at home. Right.

Being knocked about at home. Sorry, they're being knocked about at home. They're being rattled at home. And so moral reformers see these saloons as sort of dirty centres of male excess. Immigrants. Immigrants, gambling, prostitution. There's quite a lot of venereal disease because people are, you know, they're fucking prostitutes in the saloon. And then they come in home and they're giving their wife knuckle sandwiches,

Goneria chases. So basically, in the early 19th century, temperance societies start forming. And initially, they're advocating for moderation rather than absence. But also this is the Protestant core of America because it's still a colourful melting pot. The original kind of...

The disdain of which you said that. It's not a colourful melting pot. No, but like the kombucha mother of it all right, the kind of... Except not that, but yeah. The like... The still water. Yeah.

The glen. The kind of... that genesis of it is incredibly Puritan. Calvinist of this. Calvinist dull people. That's the starting edge. Well, it's people of the Mayflower. Yeah, because I guess if there's always been

anti-immigrant sentiment, even when there was 15 people in America, the first people to get there were Puritans in that sense. Yes. So they got there and the next people off the boat, they're like, bloody out. There's 20 people.

So they kind of had the right of first refusal. But it would be interesting to talk to Jamarck. about this because I have a theory that basically America today, the struggles are four different centuries of Europeans fighting each other. And you've got puritans from 17th century England who are in the same country as like cosmopolitan Italians from the 20th century. Yes. Yeah. They have the, their opinions haven't changed or evolved. Yeah. So that's why it's such a fuck country and that you've still got Cromwell. You know, the Hicks are basically Cromwellian. Yeah. Yeah. And they're fighting like cosmopolitan, Viennese cafe culture people on these

Anyway, so early temperance movements are basically driven by women, and they are starting to portray alcohol as the source of every social problem. Maybe it's your stories. You know, what were they saying? What were they wearing? Anyway, campaign literature starts to insist that alcohol causes child drunkards, to be fair children are drinking beer at AIDS. What's this picture? This is the child drunkers. Is this like a sort of tarot card?

What's in your future? The child drunkard. Who's the child? The child asleep. The baby asleep. Just pissed. Pissed. Well, he looks fine.

He looks absolutely fine. Leave him alone. Why are they crying? Tony, the child drunkard. Tony's fine. Tony's asleep. Why are they crying? Tony's killing it.

Tony's had a few pot. Tony's had a few beers. Is that a crime, love? Yeah? Is that a crime? Can Tony not have a few pints after an nursery and just go to bed? Yeah, so you know those dads

take the selfie with their kids with the beers? It's that, but they drink the beers. Exactly. Yeah, I don't take the selfies. Yeah, I don't really see the problem as anyway. It says, yeah, now this is quite funny.

The women's temperance movement starts saying that alcohol consumption can cause spontaneous human combustion. Right. So you just, I mean, Sandra will at some point just burst into flames. We should do the history of spontaneous human combustion. We should. On the Patreon at some point. I guess you'd have quang duck. Quang duck is the Buddhist monk in Vietnam.

That's not spontaneous. I don't think he thought. It wasn't planned, was it? It was planned. Was it planned? It was a protest. I know it's a... That wasn't an accident.

I know it's a protest. Did you think it was a freak accident? No. I know it's a protest. I know it's self-immolation. Yeah. But I don't know how... I think like he woke up...

I think he woke up that day really horny and auto-erotically self-immilated. Come, I'm going to bustion. Sorry? Come, I'm going to bustion. Yeah. spontaneous. Come bustion. Yeah.

You know what, Charlie? That was speed-wise. That was there. I think that's the first time you said a pun as at the right time. Yeah. Normally you say it about, now three minutes later yeah when we're talking about something else talking about something completely else anyway the women's christian temperance union is founded in 1874 the wc t u

wc t u s people all know that you know and this lot you know these these girls are absolute shaggers you know these are top-class girls right they're a laugh yeah they're funny um they uh no the opposite of that yeah uh these are some chewy broads difficult point Difficult pints. I mean, yeah, well, there's no pint. It's water. No pints more difficult. No pints.

Lips that touch whiskey are lips that will never touch mine. Fine with me. Keep on walking, love. Yeah? And I want your whiskieless lips, right? You look boring as shit. So women still lack the right to vote. Right.

And so what people start thinking is they go, we're never going to be able to... It's all right. It's a privilege, but gone. Yeah. Yes, it's earned. okay it's earned through being fun to hang around with you

who do I want to hang out within the polling booth not you we've dealt with this issue how are we still talking about this in 20206 you know we've dealt with this issue

anyway so women basically realize that their lives as punch bags you know they don't have any as I said at some point I come in what series they are legally

they are essentially their husband's fridge yeah men and women it's booze bags and punch bags that's what the whole country is. Can a man not hit his fridge? You know, the fridge is making weird noises, give it a tap. Right.

So they think that alcohol is essentially a woman's issue. Right. Because wives and children bear the consequences of male drinking. Although Tony, the child drunkard looks fine. All right. Tony's sleeping. Tony can come out with us. Yeah.

I give Tony the vote. Yeah. What's he voting for? They've got Tony to go to sleep. Sleep, you think you crack sleep and then they have another development leap and it goes out of the window. Beer kind of covers all of that.

Smooth the edges of child development. Okay, what is it, child? How early do kids learn to be rude to their moms at this point? Because is it pretty early? They basically just immediately disrespect. Well, if they're having three pints off the nursery, I reckon they're being quite salty over there.

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Nice travels. It's time for race rankings. We've ranked Pakistani's high-reaching. recently, but let me tell you about Kaurulian Indians. Oh, they're performing well at the moment. Listen, they are hot, sexy Indians. They are some hot property. And they are top of my list of my favourite races of people right now.

Wow. I mean, this is big news. I mean, you're finding out here that this is the Screenrock podcast. This is a regular feature we do. We do a bit of race rankings. It's kind of like woke racism whilst talking about social media, really. That's our vibe. Exactly.

We pretend that we want to talk about social media. Really, we want to talk about whether we prefer people from Pakistan or Brazil. and right now Pakistan are winning, baby. So listen to the Scree Rock Podcasts, if that's a kind of thing. We'll see you there. Groups of women now start protesting. They start a sort of a platform for political activism. And so what they do is they march through towns carrying Bibles.

Again, this is during the time of the second great awakening where America's Protestantism starts to become more sort of outward-looking and social. Second Great Awakening. Yes, it is. Is there a third one? I don't know. What's the first Great Awakening? I guess when they arrive?

I don't know. But basically, American Protestantism in this age starts to take on this kind of social good. I guess it's more Methodist, maybe. Right, yeah. They kneel outside pubs, praying, singing hymns, and begging customers to go home. Begging.

I mean, it's a bit of a bonoical, isn't it? So they sort of like doing like anti-abortion rallies outside abortion clinics, but instead it's outside the pub. God hates pines. Yeah. Westbro-Baptist church outside the pub Fuck off, would you?

But again, it's a bit of a bono kill. Yeah. It still exists, by the way, the WCTU, and it's the oldest non-sectarian women's organization in the world. Let's see who runs it,

right, today. Let's have a look at it. Current WCTU website, and is it prescribed as a terrorist organization? Let's have a look at, oh my God, the hairstyles haven't got better.

Mary Lee, pal. Mary, rise up and build. They want prohibition back. To be fair, but this is like, you know, what's he called? Huberman stuff. Yeah.

Isn't it? It's all coming back around. It's coming back. It's true. Now, Carrie Nation is also known as the woman with the hatchet. Who, who, yeah, we've just got a photo of her up here. Now, what's she so pleased about?

I can't think of anyone I'd like to have a pint with less, actually, than Carrie Nation. I don't know about that, really. Look at that devilish smile. I do think she's got some good jokes about Chinaman in her head rattling around. She looks like she's got, she's prepping for some accents. for sure. Now, she is a self-described

bulldog running beside Jesus. Okay. Jesus is bulldog. Now, her first husband had suffered from severe alcoholism

and died a year into their marriage. And so she claims that in 1900, she'd received a direct message from God instructing her to destroy saloons.

So she basically goes on like a pub crystal and out. And she smashes bottles and mirrors and furniture with a fucking axe. Kind of terrifying.

Yeah. The saloon smasher on the war path. Yeah. And she refers to these raids as hatchitations. So she'd storm bars shouting Bible verses. Does she have any backup?

Or is it just like a John Wick sort of stuff? John Wick, but it's all pints. Now her mother had suffered from delusions and convinced she was Queen Victoria. And so there was a history of mental illness in the family. Really? That woman was smashing pubs up with an axe. Anyway, she was, as the suffragettes were,

exceptionally good at propaganda. And so she, you know, you could get souvenir hatchets and sign photographs. And America, you can go a long way with merch. You know, everything. You know how World War II's about the factories,

America politics is about merch, really. It is. It is merch. I mean, make America great again. Exactly. They just won the merch walk. Close the pubs. Now, she's generating publicity.

She's kind of a, you say she's an Emily Davidson extremist. She's a pub terrorist. Yeah. Asama bin Laundrie. Stryinlaughts again. The Fanny banner back at it. meanwhile the anti-saloon league

fuck it sorry only mate this is favourite alcoholic drink is a dirty vodka martini of course it is you minks you absolute minks dirty you just know the way she orders it as well can I have a dirty vodka martini well now I'm dirty

because I've soiled myself oh bloody hell I'm of olive bright in my pants now barman changing she's right something else is going to have Um-clapped. She mentioned that after wrapping up a long and exhausting night presenting news night,

her go-to ritual at home is a simple vodka on ice. Fuck, she's a classy woman. She's a classic woman. So, interest, this is interesting, this is the birth of political lobbying. I didn't know this.

Oh, that's interesting. So the anti-saloon league, they were a single-issue thing. And so they basically judge politicians on whether they support alcohol restrictions. Oh. And this is the birth of American law. Yeah.

Yeah. But for booze. Yeah. So this is the birth of American lobbying. So, you know, industrialists. I could tell, Charles, see it. Because his mouth has never been more open. Yeah.

Tate the taste the pun in the air. All points are cracking. All pints are cracking, A-PAC. Yeah. No, then they're not been of, they're anti-pints. All points of crap. There you go. This is an 18903.

Should we place this? Yes. Hitler's four years old. Okay. Yeah, that's nice. Hitler's four years old. Yeah, but you expect what's it before? So it's before.

How old is Paula Hitler? Is Paula Hitler younger or older than Adolf? Not been born yet. So this is before, this is after Adolf. Before Paula. Are patrons know where they are? But it was the birth year of Edmund. Sorry.

Who's Edmund Hitler? Who's the other, the other Hitler boy? The other Hitler brother. I'm watching that film. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Pause the prohibition for a second. New episode title. New episode title.

Edmund Hitler, the forgotten Hitler. He died of measles at 1900. What could have been? Edmund died at age of five from measles. Adolf, who loved him dearly, was greatly affected by this, beginning to talk to trees. Wow.

Well, there's just so much we don't know about Hitler and his motivations and psychological. Edmund Hitler, he lost a brother. So maybe it's all protesting the grief. Maybe that whole time he was just looking for a mate. It's a very moving story, actually. It is. It's about brotherly love.

It is. The Hitler story. God. Paula, Edmund, say their names. Love is pain. Minute silence, please. Poor Edmund Hitler. The Hitler, we never got to know.

So who's supporting prohibition? Industrialists, Rockefeller, Ford, they want sober workers. Yes, of course. And so by the early 20th century, it's basically it's women, business leaders, tough pints like Carrey Nation. And interestingly, me, their first appearance in the pod, friends of the pod

the Ku Klux Klan someone commented on their Instagram recently saved the Clueless Clueless Cluck's Clown which I really enjoyed. They are funny. They are really, I listen to something about the Klu Klux Klan I can't wait to do them because they're

phenomenally thick. It's awesome. The rankings of the Klu Klux Klan is in apps. There's like genies, wizards, wizards. It's like completely They're all wearing sorting hats. It's Harry Potter. It's literally like a racist Harvey Priceley. Yeah.

So you've got Grand Cyclops, Grand Titan, Grand Dragon, Grand Wizard. Goals. Yeah, it's basically, it's like... We need to save this because this is such good stuff. Yeah, we will. We will do a series on the KKK. Such good stuff. Anyway, they use Prohibition to kind of...

They've been sort of defeated, I think, before this, and they'd come back and they used prohibitioners. They've had many different, like... Phases. Fases, yeah. Yeah. But anyway, they'd come back. on the backs of sort of the temperance movement.

And of the back of the birth of the nation. Yes. One of the first big Hollywood films. So they basically form this alliance with the temperance movement, the tough pints and the women. Wow. Because they're like,

we hate booze because men hit women when they're drunk. And the KKK are like, oh yeah, yeah, sure. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And also everyone in the drinks is Jewish or Italian. Because the KKK are anti-Italian at this point. So the women are trying to split up the pubs because they're

drinking places. Yeah. They're trying about the pubs because there's Italians and Jews in there. Yeah. And it's like, well, we should...

It's called centrist. You know? It's triangulation. Right. You know? So the KKK view alcohol is un-American. Yeah, they want to break the pubs while the people are still in there.

That's the difference. Yeah. The women want to get everyone out of the pub. They're like, no, no, no, no, keep them in there, and bomb the whole thing. So they think it's a Catholic and Jewish immigrant problem.

Right. And the women think it's a male problem. Right. Anyway, World War I kicks off 1914. And this kind of puts the whole thing on rocket boosters because a lot of American breweries are German. Pabst, Bleach, and Schlitz, um, Budweiser, Kronenberg, essentially.

That sounds like Hitler when he's asking to leave. Yeah. Pat, boosh, schlitz. Um, so Germans are basically being lynched, uh, in America, uh, because they think, but like beer, beer brewingers, because they're seen as like, it's seen as supporting the enemy. Yeah, because lager was only just invented to Germany. I think in the 1880s, I want to say.

Yeah. Because and laager means cave because they just kept it in a cold place. Well, and part of the reason all the brews in the Midwest is there's lots of caves and it's the chalk is all the right whatever sediment anyway. Yeah, lagering. Because grain rationing was in place, alcohol production seemed quite wasteful. Right. And so suddenly beer drinking is unpatriotic. And so this campaign kind of gathers astonishing speed.

And in January 1919, the air. 18th Amendment is ratified, which basically bans... Probably without World War I and the anti-German Prohibition wouldn't have got over the line. This was probably the thing that pushed it over the line. Yeah, yeah. Surprisingly.

But then it's the same in Britain. World War I basically gives women the vote. Yeah. So it's ratified in 1919. It comes into place in January 1920. This officially bans the manufacture, sale, and transportation of intoxicating liquor. So prohibition that comes into force January 1920.

And they have funerals for all the pints, basically. They just pour beer into the sewer. And everyone stands around. Takes that out of. Temperance groups stage mock funerals as a kind of satire. Right. Have I got news for you stuff? Yeah.

What do you is for John Barley Corn? Have I got booze for you? Have I got booze for you? You see, you can do it. It's good. You can do it. Can we ever look at John Barley Corn? So what's this, the sort of boogeyman for the boozy man?

Yeah. It's not a very savage. age satirically. Anyone up for a couple of points of John Bollicorn later? Who are you? Who'd you go out with... Who'd you go out with last night?

Well, let's just say that me and John Barlecorn had a great time. Yeah, I was drinking by myself again, yeah. So they had a... Do you like meeting strangers in the pub or do you prefer to stick to your own? I don't really like meeting people

full stop, I think. You're done now, all right? I'm done, I'm so done. You've got all the people you want to meet now. Yeah. Anyone else is just a burden. Just another fucking WhatsApp group

we've got to be in. Yeah. No thanks. You're creaking under the amount of social pressures you have as low. Genuinely, WhatsApp, so I'm just running away from it like a coward. Everyone's asked me stuff, ignoring it. What about like a kind, sad old man who was quite gentle about it, but offered to play darts?

And he looked like he really wanted to, but he wasn't. No. I don't think so. No. I mean, I'm mixed. Sonders with the mood for it, but a lot of the time I'm not. I imagine you give everyone their time. Everyone I don't know.

It's a transaction. Right. What do they want? No, I don't want to give to you. go away. Basically, it's people, I've got friends, I've got colleagues, and then it's big issue sellers. That's how I see the world.

Right. So like, oh, how are you, mate? Oh, yeah, no, really good way. No. That's my kind of, that's my range. Yeah. Socially. The bandwidth.

That's my bandwidth. Yeah. Now, as a side note, they had a derogatory word contest. Uh-oh. Okay. I'm listening. I'm like to apply to be world champion to invent a new derogatory word for people who drank in violation of the amendment. So they don't really, I guess these are people who don't

understand fun at all. Yeah. So them trying to, to like win this propaganda battle showing that they're fun as well. It just doesn't really come out well. No. So they wanted a word that would shame people like scab or slacker out of 25,000 entries. Competition. Yeah. Is this public? Yeah, it's a slur competition. Why are we not doing slur contests anymore? Yeah. There's a, there's a $200 dollar prize, three and a half grand in today's money for a new slur. Scoff law. Scoff law. So they're just really, just don't get it.

No, because they're sober people. It's not funny. You know, scoffing at the law. That'll show them. You scoff law. Yeah, as if that's going to hurt you, the fact that you scoff at the law. I mean, that really is. You say that with a hard W. You know, it's not a slur. Scoff law.

These are pretty straight-laced people. It gets called the Volster Act because he was the senator who actually put it through. but quite quickly everyone starts finding workarounds so medicinal whiskey prescriptions are still allowed like medicinal cannabis basically I got chronic pain

I'm gonna get pissed yeah and so suddenly the pharmaceutical industry starts to explode right so the amount of pharmacies America goes up by I don't know how many because suddenly I was like oh that's where you go all greens went from 400

yeah that's four shops because they were like oh brilliant well yeah I know I've got pain actually. I've got long COVID. Can I have a pint? It doesn't criminalise consumption or possession. Okay.

Wine manufacturers start selling bricks of grape juice. Right. And on the bottle it says, warning, don't add two litres of water and three cups of sugar and leave this in a cup of us

every weeks because it'll turn into wine, wink. Right, right. That is kind of cool. Yeah. That's like Beethoven's brother advertising. I wouldn't do this by me here. Religious exemptions allow

church is access to wine. So bootleggers would fabricate congregations and then poses clergy. So in 1931 while visiting New York, Churchill forgot to look right for oncoming traffic, gets hit by a car going 35 miles an hour, and he suffers head wounds and cracked ribs, and his doctor prescribes him a minimum of six shots of spirit a day, especially at meal times. And do you think he pushed back on that at all? Oh no, I think he was absolutely fine That'll do nicely

Yeah It's funny because I've Not to brag But I've knocked over a fat man I've 35 miles an hour I've also hit a fat man down At 35 miles an hour No I was going to say

35 miles an hour in a car It feels quite slow Right But on a jet ski It feels fucking awesome Yes Yeah because you've got all the spray Yeah

Yeah Yeah it would take either exactly one Stephen Hawking under the right conditions or tens of thousands of impact. Now that's an interesting from AI. It's given us two very interesting options. It then says to understand why we can look at the physics of a collision with Stephen Hawking's famous BEC mobility motorized wheelchair and the legendary rumor that he used it to weaponise

toe crushing against his enemies. I don't know what a rumor. I'd never heard that rumor. I don't know this legendary rumor. What do you mean weaponized toe? What? He'd go on people's feet. Also, who are Stephen Hawking's enemies?

Yeah. The more I find out about him, the more of a deviant. This guy was a fucking lad. I know. He's sort of fucking shagging, crushing toes. Famously the subject of a long-running rumor that he used his motorized wheelchair to intentionally run over the toes of people he disliked. He accidentally rolled over Prince Charles's toes while demonstrating how his wheelchair spun

around in 1977. Obser's joke that the maneuver wasn't an accident. His dream target was Thatcher. So, Thatcher had to deal with the IRA. She had to deal with hawking running over her feet. You would hate him. The look on his face after he did it would piss you off. Well, I mean, he doesn't have much of a choice.

Yeah, but can you make... He's just trying to play footsie, to be fair to. Yeah. I mean, how does he flirt? Yeah, I mean, he is literally Beethoven's brother forever. Yeah. They should call it Beethoven Brother syndrome. Yeah.

He's got BBS. Yeah, I mean, look at him there. Watch out. If you just had your toes crunch by this guy, that would piss me off. Yeah, no, he's going at the canal if he does that. Yeah, he's like a line bike. I mean, he is half line bike, isn't he? Get him with a shopping trolley's in the fucking canal if he does that.

No, thank you. Anyway, in the next episode, Booz is outlawed. What happens next? Jan Marco, Sarasi, somehow a straight man. We'll be outing him in the next episode. You're here to meet. Who are you here to meet? Not me.

Have you here to eat? No. And we'll be getting into bootleggers, speak easies, organized crime, and the roaring 20s. That's already on the Patreon where for three pounds a month you get early access. And if not, we'll see you next time for the continuation of the American Saudi story. Goodbye for now. My reg league goalie says he plays for the love of the game. You gave up six goals left.

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