Fin vs History - Doing Ramadan in Greenland | IRA Hunger Strikes (Part 1)

Episode Date: March 23, 2026

This episode of Fin vs History is brought to you by Surfshark. Secure your privacy with Surfshark! Enter coupon code FVH for an extra 4 months at https://surfshark.com/fvh Piles will set you free. Social darwinism, lesbianism and the O’Taliban won’t. IRA Hunger Strikes (Part One) The show for people who like history but don't care what actually happened.   For weekly bonus episodes, ad-free listening and early access to series, become a Truther and sign up to the Patreon  ⁠patreon.com/fintaylor  00:00 - Irish Tapas  04:48 - Last Defence For Lesbians  08:33 - Operation Motorboat   12:51 - The O’Taliban  15:19 - The Greenland Muslim  19:28 - Closeted Social Darwinist  24:35 - Uber GTA   27:19- Pool Ball Bum Ball  31:55 - Piles Will Set You Free  35:30 - 180!  40:16 - UVF  45:48 - Unwise But Not Illegal  48:46 - Botty’s Been Blown    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Great news. The federal EV rebate is back. Eligible customers get up to $5,000 with the federal EVAP rebate on select 2027 Volt and 2026 Equinox EV models. Visit your local Chevrolet dealer today for more details. Welcome back to Finn versus History. As everyone with Horatio Gold. Thus has no laugh and matter. This podcast, this is a legitimate historical podcast.

We are, I'm delighted to say, returning to the troubles. the tapass restaurant The skew whiff As we call it The Troubles Lots of little picky bits Yes It's we started this series

It is small plates Yeah We started this series A year ago I believe And we only got Three years in Yeah

We're now heading towards The Hunger Strikes Which we'll do With next episode But there's lots To enjoy before then Bundle of laughs It is a bundle of laughs

Famously And it's It's obviously A completely Settled issue That no one's bothered by anymore

And just because we got away with it last time doesn't mean we shouldn't try again. Yes, of course. I've got active dates in the diary, in Northern Ireland, and I'm thinking, fuck it. Let's roll the dice. I'm a father of two.

Maybe I want to be blown up. Maybe. Let's see. So now last episode, what small plates did we enjoy last episode? Bloody Sunday. Yeah. Bloody Friday.

Yeah. Most days. A bloody every day for about five years. Should we do a quick, maybe a quick recap for any listeners that haven't heard. go back to... I don't know if the historical context

is important for this, though. No. I think famously two British men just having a crack at it. I actually think you just take it as it is. I don't think looking back in the past gives you any new perspective.

No. Basically... I think it muddies the water. It doesn't actually make anything clearer. I think you should just treat both sides as doing it completely with no context or reason,

just doing it on a whim. What are you, Donald Boyd? That's what are you, Donald Boyd? Northern Ireland. island, the north of the island of Ireland, has several, at this point, political and paramilitary groups that differing between Catholic and Protestant. It's like the kind of golden age of the boy band where it felt like there was a million different boy bands in sync, you know, had Louis Walsh getting fucking, was it West Life Boyzone,

you know, it feels like there's so many of these different competing boy bands. Yes. Trying to make it big. Yes. And they're all swirling around Northern Ireland. They all have acronyms that sound like shopping channels. UBF, PIRA. They're all sitting on stalls turning around seductively.

Wet hair. In terms of the small plates we enjoyed last year on the tapas. I mean, saying tapas, reading a tapas menu out in Northern Irish is one of the most funding. Patas bravas! I like some, hey, hey, you know, excuse me! It is, when you're in a restaurant and you'd like service, bring it out the Northern Irish accent. Everyone puts their glass out. Because who won the traitors this year?

Oh, it was Rachel. Rachel. She kind of won with the Northern Irish accent. That sort of, it completely fucked everyone over, basically. Have you seen that across her? Yeah, have you seen, I don't think that's funny? Have you seen the, the whole thing about how every person that gets voted out first is black or non-white? Yeah.

It's like a horror film. The first one to go is black. But it's just, it's very funny that every series there's been like, There's something I don't trust. And like, well, they haven't got anything to go on. Yeah.

Black guy. I just, I'm getting a feeling from you. I don't know what it is. Yeah. I just, I wish they, because in the first series,

the first person who left, um, I remember this vividly. I thought this show is fucking brilliant. Because the first person they kicked out, they're like, yeah, you didn't,

um, you didn't, um, you didn't cheers when we all cheers. And she was like, well, I've only got one hand. And I was doing something else. No,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I don't trust you. Well, maybe we should make it racially ambiguous for the first couple of rounds of traitors. Or everyone has to do a different accent

to the one they have. Yes. Yeah, okay. I think that would get past the sort of uncocious. Hello, dear. I have and have always been a traitor. Transgender.

Oh, I'd love to see him on the traces. Especially if it's the only question he was asking. You are gay. Where are you gay? I would like to start. tonight. Why are you gay? Why are you gay? You're a transgender. Are you transgender? The country of Northern Ireland is transgender. It is transgender country. Pray for genuinely transgender people within Northern out because how many fucking things they got to identify as?

My word. Men, women, Northern Ireland, Northern Ireland, Britain Island. Everyone pick a team. Yeah. In our last episode, we dealt with the year 1972, which was the, which was pretty bleak. Yeah. It was the bloodiest year of the troubles. Yeah. That's included the bloody Sunday, the big boo-boo. The whoopsy. The big whoopsie. You know, I know that we're fairly impartial as a podcast, but I put my hands up and I'd say that the British were,

there was a bit of a whoopsies of us. We slept in a banana peel. After Bloody Sunday, they suspend Stormont, which is the Northern Irish. Yes. Stormonts where all the DUP lesbians are, right? Yes. For some reason, I hear Stormen, it feels like a...

Arlene Foster. It feels like a lesbian barricade. Why have you got Penny Morden? up Charlie. Are you trying to make me bust? Yeah. Yes. She, yeah, she's... Her carrying the sword. Stand up and fight.

You'd like to sit on that sword, wouldn't you? Penny. I think to say that sword. What is it? Do you remember when she did her stand up and fight speech? Did you see that? What was that? Have you seen that? It's the shittest speech. Can we watch a bit of it? Yeah, of course. The thing is, with all these, with all these absolute smoke shows, you know, know, their speeches are never as...

Forget what they're saying. It's like, there's trust cheese speech, you know? Yeah. It's like when page three girls have the little bubble saying, I think our boys should... You know, it's not for them to say, really. It's not why I'm... It's not why I'm...

Pinder, I'm not coming to you for how we're going to solve the Gaza crisis, all right? Liz Trust, I'm not going to you to be the... Oh, no, you are the... Liz trust, I'm not coming to you to set the mortgage market, all right? That's not what you're strong at. What you're strong at is getting your gazungas out on page three. What's...

What's Morden saying then? Come on, Charlie. And fight. Because when you stand up and fight, the person beside you stands up and fights. Yeah, it's not. It's like hearing David Beckham's feet. It is.

It's worse. Stop saying stand up and fight. And when our nation stands up and fights. Absolutely. I mean, 10 out of 10, every other aspect of her. For the woman. So, Stormant is where Arlene Foster.

For me, For some reason the word stormant, Arlene Foster, DUP, in my head, it feels like a last defence for lesbians. It's like a barricade. Lesbian rocks drift is storming. Do you know what I mean? Get back! If shit is the van, the lesbians will retreat to Stormont.

Well, that's the motherland, isn't it, for lesbians? I feel is stormant. Yeah, look at her. Christ. Now, I think she's famously very anti-gay. Yes. But she's also probably the most lesbian-looking woman there's ever been. So she's not gay? But just for some reason.

it just feels right. Why are you gay? That's what she'd say. The last redoubt of lesbianism is stormant. But the Brits at this point, they have to, they take over. They impose direct rule. The British troop deployment rises by about 21,000 personnel by the late 1972. 72 is a bit of a bad year.

It's a bad year on all sides. The IRA announced official... Who is this Heath? This would be Heath. And Heath, of course, is, you know, he's getting around the table. Come on everyone. Yeah. Let's all get around the table.

Let's shake hands. Roll up your sleeves. Let's thrash out of deal. He's always talking to the IRA. An early July, provisional IRA delegation. He's putting a Google meet in the calendar and just having a pointless Zoom. He loves that. Well, he takes value in having a full schedule of meetings, much as Channel 4 commissioners do.

Yes. It feels like a TV commissioner. Just 45 minutes, you're like, did anything get achieved? Well, the last 20 years, I've been Channel 4. force troubles. Nothing has happened. Yeah, but a lot of meetings. Yeah, and a lot's been lost.

A lot's been lost. A lot of death. So after this, what happens is something called Operation Motor Man. Sounds fun. Which, it's not Operation Motorboat, Charlie. No. We're going to go in there. I mean motorboating Arlene Foster would, you know.

Would what? I don't know. I don't know. It came to my head. Would it be nice? I think it would... She's got a nice shelf of tit. Yes, she does.

Yeah, so I wouldn't mind sleeping on the top of her bosom. She doesn't strike me as a shoulder to cry on. She's not soft. No. She's hard as a woman can get. Granite. You could build houses out of Arlene Foster. So Motorman is where the British Army,

it's similar to when Reagan clamps down on the war on drugs. Right. It's, you know, it's heavy-handed, you might say. Or it's not as exactly what's needed. At all times, we will be giving both perspectives. It's a complicated live issue. What's the truth? Yeah.

Who knows? Did any of this happen? Probably not. Probably not. It's been many ways it's easier to just say nothing happened. It happened too long ago to know if any of this happened. It's like talking about ancient Persia. Exactly.

It's the same. This episode of Finnverse History is brought to you by Sir Shark. Guys, look, you've heard it from us before. Yeah. No homo. No homo. I love Surf Shark. Yeah, that's fair enough.

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FVH. Sing it with me. Foxshot, Vagina, Hotel. We run the Foxshot Vagina Hotel and you get four extra months of Surf Shark. Don't let these online threats catch you off, So Operation Motorman is the largest British military operation since the 1956 Suez Crisis.

It's the largest conducted in Ireland since the War of Independence. 22,000 British soldiers are involved, but heavy equipment, tanks. And the objective is to dismantle the no-go areas that since the 1969 riots, this is all the Cibolo rights, all that... Like East London. Nowadays, East London. Yeah. Like Brick Lane, Siddiquistan. The whole of Birmingham.

The whole of Birmingham is a... a no-go area. You go in there, you're immediately converted to Islam. Yeah. You have to. You have to these days.

It's similar. I guess it's U-Lez. Yeah. In a way. Yes. We bring up U-Lez every single episode. It's the live issue of our time.

But it's not ultra-low emission zones, are there? Because there's quite a lot of emissions. It's a, it's U-HES. Yeah. Belfast in the 70s ultra-high emission zones. It's not environmentally friendly, I think. No.

No. No. A lot of cocktails and stuff. No. No. Greta's not enjoying the perjoles. No. So they're trying to break up these barricades,

these in Derry and in Belfast, and the operation begins at 4 a.m. Sorry? Hello Derry. I think it's a play on Hello Dairy. Right. Yeah. Charlie's puns are, you know,

I like the competency showing. They track. It's just more, as sometimes there's more, what do you want us to do with that? Yeah. Not much. Just acknowledge me.

Just acknowledge me. You are acknowledged. No, Derry. I exist. Put it in a sentence. Hello, Derry. I guess that is the sentence, isn't it? That is a sentence.

British forces use bulldozers and Centurion AVOEs. Can we see what that looks like? Is that just Arlene Foster strapped to a pickup truck? To smash through barricades before infantry advanced in armored vehicles. And the IRA don't attempt. Oh, look at that. Bloody hell. A big old tank that.

That's Arlene in their 20s. Yeah, that's. Arlene going for a drive. Arlene going for a stroll. She had a bigger nose on her youth. During the operation in Derry, British soldiers shoot four people and they kill a 15-year-old civilian

and a 19-year-old PIRA member. What were they wearing? What were they wearing? It's a very valid question. What were they saying? Mini-skirts. P-IRA is the provisional IRA. Right.

But the operation from the British perspective succeeds. The provisional's lost their sanctaries. But they don't smash the provisional. They don't smash the gangs. Don't smash the gangs. And so, but they've, Operation Motor Man means the IRA have to transition.

Again. Again. Back to mail. Sorry, I should have said that they're all, they're all, they're all in wigs and miniskirts at this point. No, they have to transition towards a sort of guerrilla warfare, the Taliban in Afghanistan.

And so they reorganize into sales of three to five members. This is the old Taliban. Yeah. Samma bin Laden and the Buk Taliban. No, the Big Taliban was William Wallace. It's the O Taliban. Suddenly it becomes much more underground and

we get to the long war in England, which is to exhaust British political commitment through sustained operations. To make something so boring that we give them Ireland back. Basically. Yeah. Just a con... It's just... Make the news so boring.

It's just constantly poking us like that. So the reason We're going through the 70s because we need to build up the context for how the hunger strikes play out on the British side. We'll be joined by our correspondent, Vittorio, to talk about the hunger strikes. Northern Ireland, one of the easier places in the world to be on hunger strike. Well, yeah, famously, there was a massive hunger strike in the 19th century. Yeah. From our perspective.

More saying, I think British cuisine in general. Oh, I see, right. No, I just cannot empathise with anyone who goes on hunger strike. I just think it's the stupidest thing you could do. I don't believe in anything. I wouldn't even... There's nothing. I wouldn't even not eat in order to get a better meal.

I'd eat the meal, then say I'd like the better meal after having eaten the bad meal. But what's that... Is that a hunger... Is that going on hunger strike? No, because I couldn't do it. Is hunger strike? Can I have more food, hunger strike?

Yeah. I don't know if that really works. I will not eat. Well, actually, I will. And I'd also like some more food. I couldn't do it. Well, you do like a muck bang would be sort of. Yeah, I do it.

I do a... A protest muck-bang? Yeah. I will not stop eating until my rights are recognized. Please someone make him stop. He's going to die. He's going to die.

Yeah, that's it. I do the opposite. I do an opposite of a fast. It's why I can never be Muslim. Yeah. I couldn't do a fast. You're nearly converted. Nearly?

You were right on the... I was ready. When I heard about the rules of Ramadan. Yeah. Tough. Tough. Ramadan's tough. Especially if you live in the Arctic Circle

because you know Ramadan is a constantly moving thing So it's like every week Every time it changes and it moves down the year So over your lifetime you'll have Ramadan at every point in the year So people who Muslims, the small Muslim population in the Arctic Circle Must be tiny Charlie just see how many Muslims are on the Arctic Circle Remember there's like three months a year where it's day forever

You know this? Yeah so they must die Yeah, right So it's tough They all become They all become Bobby Sands up in that There can't be many Muslims living in. No, I think if you live that high up, you said it on Mecca.

You're like, you do whatever at Mecca time. There's a little mosque on the tundra, which is about 100 people in Canada. Yeah. About 1,000 in Tromso in Norway. Yeah, so Ramadan then can be pretty bleak. Yeah. I don't think, I mean, I don't think Islam works in the snow. No, I don't think they'd really thought about that.

It's a desert. Greenland. One, there's one known Muslim living in Greenland. What's his name? Shout him out. shout him out Greenland the Greenland Muslim

Do you reckon it sounds like a Jason Statham film or something The Greenland Muslim Do you reckon there are people in Greenland being like bloody hell Greenland, Greenland Danistan

nowadays these days can't do anything Oh greener's got down the drain His name is Wassam Azakir Friend of the show A friend of the pod Wasam Akka

He lives in Nuk He runs a restaurant In Nuck He fast for 21 hours During the Arctic summer Fuck me Fuck me So hang on

He has three hours Where he just muck bangs And then he goes back on fast Fair fucks Fucking hell Shout out Wasam Add him to the pantheon of the great Everyone else

Everyone else in Greenland These days Can't say anything these days Sharia law in Greenland Fucking Wasam will find Well there are 12 people So it's true It's about

It's 10% of the country Fucking he's got his Sharia restaurant There and I can't fucking drive anywhere Because of the Ulaz That Wasam's put in Wasam Watsam Anistam Yeah

Nukistan. Go on. Can we find a picture of him? Let's see what he looks like. I think that might be him. Is that him? He looks like you, Charlie. Oh no, he's telling us.

No, there's no pictures of Wassam. But anyway, if you're listening, Wasam... That's his mosque, maybe? That's a shed. Does Wassam have a mosque? If they're turning our sheds into mosques, come on.

You know, make Greenland great again. Sadiq, can we have any space? Yeah, it's a long history of Greenland. You can't have it just be completely overruled by foreign cultures like this. Anyway. If you're listening, shout out. Shout out, Wassam. Keep going.

21 hours of fasting. Christ. So in December 1973, we get to the Sunningdale Agreement, which is Heath's first major attempt to build a political settlement. Do you want to place this? Let's place 1973. 1973. That is, it's after eugenics has been. disavowed.

So would you say that's 1945? Yep. That's the Nereberg? A tragedy. Yeah, okay. A tragedy for eugenics. Yeah.

Newenberg. And it is before social Darwinism starts to come back in Big Brother. Okay. Which you'd say scratches a similar itch.

When the kind of the sun is saying maybe we, when people are talking about putting, sterilising things to people's water supply to stop a council house people having

six until we're kids. Yes. Interesting. Which is kind of, I think it's the Big Brother starts that sense. Big Brother is mainly where Nicky and Big Brother Yeah, it's mainly where

Kinga. Kinga bottle up of Fanny. So however sticking the bottle of Fanny Did that bring Social Darwinism back into the... Certainly in my head it did. Something's got to stop. Something's got, these people have got to stop breeding. When she's breeding with a bottle? I suppose so.

But yeah, I'd say Social Darwinism, I just, you know, the snobbish noises that certainly my parents make when Big Brother was on, it scratched a similar part of the brain as I imagine the eugenicists. The phrenology part of the brain. Yeah. And they're like, God, this is this absolute tripe. These people shouldn't be on screen. It shouldn't be rewarded.

Yeah. You know. Jay Goody. God. It's Jay Goody. Yeah. You know. Rest in power.

J. Okay, yeah. So this is kind of in the middle of this. So Sunningdale, it's heath, it's trying to get a Northern Ireland assembly together. Is any social Darwinism happening around this? Because I know that a lot of social Darwinism is happening in the past in Ireland. They got big heads. Therefore, we should take all their food.

Yeah, well, yeah. They went on hunger strike for five years in the 1840s. You've made your point. I've made my point. But was any of that being talked about now? is this kind of in the, is in the low point of social Darwinism. So I guess it's not a line issue.

I think it's very hard to be out, out, an open, out the closet of social Darwinists these days. I'm still firmly closeted. Sure. As a social Darwinist. But it's too big-headed Irish people against each other.

So it's like confusing for a social Darwinist, isn't it? Yes, it is. It's a civil war. It's Spider-Man meme. Yeah, it is. But they've both got massive heads.

It's the Korean War. It's Donkey Kong mode on Golden Eye. Yeah. He didn't play in 64, Golden Island. No, I do you. Christ. You, Charlie, Look at me like I'm not a real man.

I've played Nintendo Wii Quantum of Solis. No, it's not the same. It's the same. It's the same generation. Were you big into Wii sports? I was very big into Wii sports, yeah. I genuinely thought I could play tennis because I could imagine you're smashing a telly because you've, you're doing yourself. I played it all quite recently.

I used to play in lockdown. I spent lockdown doing wee poppers where. We poppers? Yeah. Me and my housemate would play Wii tennis and whoever lost the game of Wii tennis had to do that many sniffs of poppers as there were points. But poppers is a great feeling. Because if you do like 15, 20 sniffs of poppers, you have to have like a really big lie down

and you feel really sick. So we spent... Sorry, you'd lose a set of tennis like 40 love and then have to do five poppers and carry off. Yeah, but we had this one game of like juice where he like, it was like 15 points of wee tennis and he had to lie down for an hour and a half. And then you're back to the tennis? And then back to tennis.

Poppers is just to just to... No. No. It doesn't, it doesn't loosen your. It doesn't really do that. I was scared doing poppers that just loads of shit would fall up my ass because it would be so gaping huge. Yes, that's right.

You don't just gape. I can see the fear in your eyes. I don't do poppers because I think it will set off some gay man's fairer image and they'll come and bum me. It's like a flare that you set out on. Don't you immediately get a grinder profile if you... I think so. But it's actually just like an immediate rush that's quite nice.

You just feel boiling. So why is it associated... I feel boiling. Why is it associated with the gay community, though? I think it does loosen it up, but it's not like, I thought it was like, it's not fearmongering. No, because I felt it doesn't. I think maybe your bum's just quite loose anyway. Doesn't touch the size.

Let's look it up. Does Poppers loosen your ass or is that an urban myth? What myth busters? We should probably be. Yeah, well, no, people need to know. If I wear a beret and shave my head, I can be one of those guys from myth busters, but instead we could be seeing if Popper's really loosens your asshole. Yeah, apparently it relaxes the smooth muscle tissue of the body, including the anal sphincts.

So your whole body loosens, but I've not noticed. personally. But you're quite loose generally. Yeah. You're not a rigid man. You walk and your arms are swinging like a monkey. You wouldn't stand well on parade, I don't think.

No, no. You're the opposite of that bloke that stand outside Buckingham Palace and the big hat. Yeah. You're the opposite of that. I'm saying hello. Saying hello to everyone. Hello, this is brilliant.

Look the size of this hat. The IRA then start to kick off a mainland England bombing campaign. Yeah. 1974 is a bad year in Britain. You can go back through our post-world British Prime Minister series. 74, Heath and Wilson are swapping the keys to number 10. Wilson's on poppers, Marcia's...

Getting pegged. Roofing around up there. But this is also where the IRA campaign comes to Britain. Take it to home. They take it home. Or not away from home. In March 1873, 1973, the old Bailey is bombed. Four car bombs go off in London.

This is peak car bomb. Right. This is, I suppose to place this in a better way, rather than the social Darwinism, would be to say that this is after the car and it's before people, it's before people would drive cars into like Christmas markets. Right. So it's a, it's a, that's the modern equivalent, right? Yes, that is the model. is you just GTA into the sidewalk. Well, that's what that's what Islamic terrorists do nowadays,

is they just, they Uber GTA. What I like about that as a thing is you can, you can become a terrorist with five seconds of bleeding. Yes. Like, you could just be driving. Yeah. Fuck it. Do you have a manifesto?

No. Yeah, I just go, fuck it. Yeah, I support Islamic State. Like, you could just, on a dime, any of us can do it. You're listening on the, you're listening on the, on the radar to LBC. They've got an Islamic State caller, you think, do you know what?

Fuck it. Fuck it. Yeah. But also you don't have to be a fan of Islamic State. You can just hate Christmas markets. That's true. But I do think make it an issue. Might as well.

Choose an issue. I'm a single issue. It's Christmas markets. I get very stressed at Christmas markets. So on the M62, there's a coach carrying soldiers from, they've been on like weekend leave. I didn't realize that soldiers all get on a bus and go for like a jolly. Ever they've been the beach or something?

Well, on just like for a holiday. The weekend leave, away from the barracks. So it's soldiers and their families. Sunshine bus. Yeah, they haven't, thankfully they don't blow up a sunshine bus. Come on, come on. Guys, Jerry, Martin, you can't blow up. You cannot blow up a British sunshine bus, right?

That's too far. No, this is sort of, I guess, the opposite of a sunshine bus, and it's the military soldiers and families. Anyway, they blow it up in the early morning of the hours of 4th of February, and 12 are killed. This starts a series of bombings that really shake the nation. The Guildford Pub bombing,

which we can get into more when Victoria is here. Why is Charlie just pissing himself laughing when I said Guildford Pub bombing? This is my mate's baby. Right. He's in the army now. He's the guy who's the pool ball

I had to put in my mouth. I had to put a bit. We were talking on our other podcast we were talking about like sports initiations this baby's dad

I had to put a poor ball that he put an eight ball pool ball that he put in his bum in my mouth

why when the baby was born are you the godfather or something he joined a cricket team was it uh rugby team

and that's his baby and he joined the army but how fucked is that photo I mean are we allowed to just show another band's baby

on this I think we can blur the baby's face right it's a baby sleeping in an army helmet It makes it look like the guy in the army's dead

He's not Right It's very much alive I mean you would know You fucking taste his pool ball bumble It's disgusting Pull ball up his ass then you're 8 ball up and he shatter out

And I had to put it in my mouth Was he on poppers No How are you getting a pool ball up there With that poppers I guess it's a lot of I think you start with smaller things And you wipe your way up

He liked it He was the worst person to have that done to He just loved it Look at him Yeah I don't I think I suppose I would challenge you and how relevant to the Guildford pub bombings that story is. Both are shocking.

Both are shocking. Both shock the country. Yeah. There will be people listening. There will be people listening who are thinking, thank fuck we've got back onto the Guildford pub bombings because of how shocking that story was. And also the baby in the army helmet was completely irrelevant

to the fact that you shoved a pool ball up your mouth and then ate it. Sort of. I mean, is his dad? Is his dad? Yeah, I don't think, you know, I don't think that boy wants to... The line lives on. The boy wants to grow up in the shadow of the king of his dad's dad's dad. His dad's poo-poo-ball. Yeah, I don't, you know, I don't want my kids to have to...

Live in the shadow of your pile. Live in the shadow of my piles. Dwarfed. I was going to more say this podcast rather than my piles. Well, we don't know which one will end up being more famous. When I'm gone and my kids are like, oh, tell us about your dad. Well, he had massive piles. Would you be the face.

of a piles campaign? Yes, yeah, hemorrhoid cream, absolutely. Me and Tyree could do it together. Me and Tyreek can go together. What face are you doing on the chute? So it's a tube ad? Is that, is this face?

Get some brands up of hemorrhoid cream. Hemorrhoid, yeah. Maybe I should bring up my own brand of hemorrhoid cream. Yeah, but, look, sponsored. That's David Gandhi. I don't know. Yeah, but you see that he Googled it with Matt Madison Mahmogadie.

Fucking idiot. Right, so anisole. Anosol. Aenisol. Would you do like an anosol collab? 100%. 100%. So on the chew...

Hombard potts! The tube ad for anal soul. Yeah. Finn Taylor. Is it just, you going like that? Big thumbs up. No,

it's probably, it's, uh, it's me with like a, a bunch of grapes. I've been blessed to not really have had piles, so I don't really know what...

I don't really know what they probably look like, and now I've seen it. I've not really seen it. Because that's the great curse. That's the great curse of piles. You're not getting a mirror? No. Like the barber's chair.

Yeah. Have you sit in the back? I finished a session of my personal. and then he holds a mirror around my ass. It's shouting me all my pyres. You happy with that. Yeah, that much better. Thank you.

Much better. Those are full to the brim. Brimming with grapes. Thank you. Yeah. Oh, God. Yeah. No.

I would, I would, you know. Anosol, if you're listening. Anasol, get in touch. If you pay off my mortgage, I will, I will wear branded analesol clothing for the next 10 years. Whatever that is. Aeros salt track suit. Anal sole caps. Tracks suit.

I'll become the. Aynosol comedian. If you pay off my mortgage, I will do it. Every man's got a price. If you pay off, anyway, you know, there's other brands I'd do it for. Who? I don't know. Whatever. You know, Anasol needs you

and it's just me pointing. Getting ready for a game means being ready for anything. Like packing a spare stick. I like to be prepared. That's why I remember 988 Canada's suicide crisis helpline. It's good to know, just in case. Anyone can call or text for free confidential support from a train responder anytime.

988 suicide crisis helpline is funded by the government in Canada. When WestJat first took flight in 1996, the vibes were a bit different. People thought denim on denim was peak fashion, inline skates were everywhere, and two out of three women rocked, the Rachel. While those things stayed in the 90s, one thing that hasn't is that fuzzy feeling you get when WestJet welcomes you on board. Here's to WestJetting since 96. Travel back in time with us and actually travel with us,

at westjet.com slash 30 years. Where are my gloves? Come on, heat. Winter is hard, but your groceries don't have to be. This winter, stay warm. Tap the banner to order your groceries online at voila.ca. Enjoy in-store prices without leaving your home. You'll find the same regular prices online as in-store.

Many promotions are available both in-store and online, though some may vary. anyway, listen, we've gone slightly off-piece. We were talking about the Guildford pub bombings which are only slightly more bleak than what Charlie does with his mates, which I've never not shocked by how you spend your time. It's crazy to me. I think we should give you less annual leave.

Yeah. Because it's never not disturbing. We've managed to take about 6% of work often from last year and he's just filling it now. Filling his ass with pool balls instead. Anyway. Work was setting you free. Yeah.

So five die in the Guildford pub bombings. Four off-duty soldiers. One is a civilian. And there's an amazing story that I think that Sambrook talks about this and the rest of history when they're doing 1974 about literally it's it's someone goes to the toilet in the pub in Guildford. And then someone fills their seat. And if they hadn't done that, like seconds later, they're dead. Oh, really? Yeah.

So again, it's the same way with Thatcher. You know, at this time, toilet breaks are never better timed than in the 70s and 80s in mainland Britain I guess in my head I always feel I'd be like the guy in air India who jumped out at the last minute I love that guy

I still because when he talks about how he survived he makes everyone who died sound like a fucking idiot What do he do? Because you're like how'd you survive? He's like I don't know I just fucking got off Why didn't you get off you fucking idiots Yeah I got off before it crashed Yeah I just cunted myself out of the plane and got off

You just sat in your seat It's like sheep Yeah he just has a slight limp Yeah I'm done Done. Fine. Easy. I could see we were going down. I thought, fuck this.

Get out. And he went and got a different plane. And then you see the footage. You're like, how has anyone go out of that? It goes into a building. And you got out. You can drop me here, actually. Yeah, I'll pop off here.

Cabby, anyway, he is good. Anyway, here's good. How the fuck is he a lot? I don't, I don't, I'm not to be a truth through about it. Go on. I don't think he was on the plane. What? He just gets out and he's like, yeah, fuck off.

He was maybe cheating on his wife in the building. It's just, it's a bit. fishy, isn't it? I bet he was cheating on his wife in the building and he didn't want people to know what he was doing. So he pretended it on the plane Ah! Ah! Ah! Oh! Ow! Oh! Ah! Ow! Yeah, it doesn't make any sense.

It's never happened ever. No. No one ever supplied. He escaped through a breach in the fuselage, but then, if it's already a fuselage, how is he getting out? He unbuckled, crawl through the wreckage and was aided by the impact breaking the plane structure. I think it made

like a perfect hole in the plane that he kind of just rolled out of. So does that mean he didn't, he did rolly poley out of it? So he didn't die on impact, though. He didn't die at all. No, no,

no. But everyone else died in the way that's just kind of stopped him. Yeah. But I think maybe he just flew out at the exact right. Do you think he was aloof the whole time?

You think he flew out? You think the plane at the building of the force, he went, whee! You think that's happened? Sort of, yeah. I think he would have just been like barreled out

in this kind of perfect, completely impossible way. Do you think it was raw dog in the whole flight? He was one of those guys. bait of his brother yeah you think he

yeah this is he was rolling in the flight and then it's just like and then it smashed them out and then he's in the street and he's like what and what

I get a different plane then because that one's you can't part of there mate but yes my point is that you know it never has never has a poo

been better timed than this time yeah piles will set you free from the IRA the main defence we have in this point in the 70s

is our piles yes but powers might not set you free if the bomb was in the toilet. So it depends which way. If the IRA are putting bombs in toilets, they are sinking to depth. I did not know they could be. It's one thing to bomb a sunshine bus, but to bomb a toilet, which is a man's safe space.

Your last refuge. That's where I go when I've had enough of my wife and kids. And yes, I'm straining. Dads have, they have the sheds and they have the toilets, and those are ours. Okay? Sadeek, you can't take those away from us. You made my toilet a mosque.

I'm finished. I'm defecting to form if you make my toilet a mosque, all right? That's the Guildford pub bombings dealt with. They're done. Victoria can tell us what he said and now why he going in trouble. Anyway, there's then the Birmingham pub bombings. Is this the Birmingham 5? Yeah, it ends up being about the Birmingham 6.

Go to the guys of skinny jeans, the Birmingham 4, outside Birmingham Station. Not the fantastic four, Charlie, the Birmingham. So let's just talk about, they're bombing pubs in near barracks and military towns, okay, in mainland Britain. The Birmingham pub bombings, this is on the evening of the 21st November 1974. This is the deadliest IRA attack in England

during the troubles. Okay. Two bombs explode in the crowded Birmingham city centre during the peak evening hours. You've got to remember, it's not like nowadays where pubs are struggling. 70s Britain, pubs are fucking booming. So this is around Birmingham New Street?

Yeah, this is the centre of Birmingham. Boring. Right? I get four guys skinny jeans, Birmingham. Just get that photo up. Are you thinking of the photo of... I mean, that was in the same area. But are you thinking of Darren Fletcher?

Here we go. Are you thinking of these guys? This is the Birmingham sick. Are these guys from Birmingham? Yeah, that's in Birmingham. Oh, is it? Yeah. So we're looking at a photo of...

Kevin Alex, James and Connor. Yeah, the boys who I imagine are all now in Dubai. Yes. They look like they're waiting for Dubai to give them. It was that meme of those four guys who took a photo outside an all bar one in Birmingham and they have spray on jeans, some of the worst fits known to man. They've got tattoo sleeves and they think they look great. And then they kind of captured an inner truth about a certain type of man in this country.

And then they went on like a lot, wrote a lot of articles about the mental health and stuff. And they even tried to reclaim the meaning. Really? I didn't realize they had a went on a mental health journey. Yeah. Well, I think they've gone back and taken a, the same photo, but now with baggy trousers. And I think I've lost a lot of respect for them. Yeah. Because it's shown, I mean, look at the guy on that you can see the outline of his phone.

He's got a, you know, a string tie belt. I thought you were talking about the picture of Wayne Rooney, Paul Skolls and Rio Ferdinand. I mean, no, that's another. That's another. Unbelievable fit. Another era with jeans, jeans and shoes. Now let's talk about the, Permium thing. So the IRA are blamed

for the attack. It kills 21 civilians, injures over 180. It's blood on the streets of Burmium. Yeah, the IRA Adarts fans, that's what they say when it goes off. Now, the organisation deny later formal responsibility. Intelligence assessments link the bombing to its

mainland campaign service units. Now, within hours of the bombing, police launched this massive terrorism investigation, one of the biggest in British history. They arrest six Irish men, Callahan, Patrick Hill, Jared Hunter, Richard McMackalany, Billy Power and Johnny Walker. They're arrested and then convicted. They become known as the Birmingham Six. They confess after a prolonged interrogation, but they then later retract those confessions,

saying that they were coerced by police, alleging physical abuse. Forensic tests presented at trial, claimed they'd handled explosives, and then decades later, those tested discredited and in 1991 they are at the court to appeal overturns all convictions. So they weren't it wasn't them? No it was just the Brits trying to find any Irish country could. Right. And it becomes

one of the most significant... Can't move for them. I know. They're everywhere. These days. They're everywhere. They're having a brilliant time at the moment in the Irish, especially in London. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Because it's basically they just get a free pass of being you know, white and British. Yeah. Not British. Sort of.

Do you know what I mean? They get none of the guilt It's kind of like Ireland's just like Here if we didn't If we hadn't done all the bad stuff And so they just get to that skip around And they get all the good bits But also culturally If you're a if you're a gentle

You haven't pissed anyone off If you're like a if you're a nice Irish man Yeah People think you're attractive People think you're sexy Yeah just because the accent As a comedian you don't have to have any jokes No

Because you come across as genial Yeah Victoria's coming on next Exactly Whereas we We with that face and this voice It's a tough sell. We actually have to write jokes because people, and we don't want to like us.

Yeah. Yeah? Because they think that guy's, that guy's eugenicist. And they're not wrong, but give me a chance. Lucky guess. I'm closeted.

Lucky guess. I'm closeted. And also don't tar us all with, you know, don't stereotype. Just because we're eugenicist, doesn't mean we're all. Doesn't mean all white British men are.

Okay. Don't, if the son outs me, like Schofield, as a social Darwinist, you know, do you want me to die? It's me vaping.

Do you want me to die? Yes. Yes, I'm a social Darwinist. So the Birmingham 6 anyway, they're banged up at this point. You can't be too careful. No.

You've got to just make sure. You know what? Everyone in Waxi O'Connor's. Yeah. If you're drinking in Guinness, fuck it. Go off. Fuck off. Bang it up for a bit. Parliament rushes through the Prevention of Terrorism Act 1974,

which grants police powers to detain suspects for up to seven days without charge. This is the long road. to Blair and a Muslim internment in Iraq, you know. Yes, that's what I've always said. But this is the first time the Brits, it was similar, it's just similar to how Muslims, British Muslims felt in the days after 9-11, I imagine.

Now, this is the beginning of a long-term emergency legislation that shapes counter-terrorist policy for decades. There's many more small plates to enjoy. We have to get to the, you know, the Ibira-Co ham that is the assassination of Lord Mountbatten. But before that, I just want to shout out the Shankill Butchers. Friends of the Pod. They're not a laugh.

No, they're not a laugh. You know, and then also they're also not a butcher's. I should stress that. Don't be, if you're in Belfast, don't be asking for Shankill Butchers. They're not a traditional butcher's. They are. They're probably good butchers, though. They would, if they could stop killing Catholic civilians and start butchering animals,

maybe. Yeah. I think they'd know the way around a cleaver. They certainly do. Let's just quickly go into the Shankill Butchers before we get to that Lord Manbatten. Now, they're a loyalist paramilitary gang, UVF. That's one of the Protestant shopping channels.

Is that why you had one of your children was a UVF? It was, yeah, we were in the UVF. And it's very, you know, when a woman goes through UVF, it's a lot harder than it thinks. You know, you've got to constantly, you've got to work at it every day. It's, yeah, it's the start of a fertility journey joining the UVF.

They operated primarily between 75 and 79 And the Shankhill Road in West Belfar So the Foles Road is the Catholic Sort of main area The Shankill is the Protestant one And this group They're pretty nasty to be fair Strong stomachs this lot

They abduct torture and kill At least 19 civilians Almost all of them are Catholic What was did Wasam get caught in there? Maybe Wassam got caught in there Maybe the Greenland Muslim They're led by a man called Lenny Murphy who's a member

of the Ulster Volunteer Force The UVF again that's a sort of is that a paramilitary organization or a political party? It gets very confusing but any Northern Irish listeners I'm trying.

Yeah, sort of. I'm sort of trying but you don't make it easy for us. You really don't. You should have made it more simple. Just simplify, right? It's too factional. Pick one team, shirts and skins.

Yeah. How are you meant to have a five-a-side tournament if he was like, well, we won't wear shorts? We won't wear one sock. Anyway. Lenny Murphy is the guy who's known the butcher and he regards the use of a blade as quote the ultimate way to kill

ending so he tortures people with a knife and then hacks each victim's throat open with the butcher's knife. Right. He shoots someone called William Pavis who was accused of selling weapons to the IRA. There's a guy, an accomplice called Marvin Connor who he's interrogated by police but then he kills himself by taking cyanide. He then confesses to the murder all under duress from Murphy. I mean

they then go on they then go around the pubs and Shankle Road they assemble a paramilitary team they all use butchers cleavers

and stuff more used to work in a meat processing factory and stolen several knives and meat cleavers so yeah

they do know the way around they are good bitches to be fair to you know what I said a lot of things that I regret but the Shankill

butchers were good buchers they knew what they were doing yeah sorry sorry in their panchus butchers there's a Catholic man

how you die it. All the cuts of Catholic man. Aberico ham. Not a cow, but anyway. Is he regarded as a serial killer or is he, because there's a political element. Well, here we go, Charlie.

You're getting to the crux of the matter that we'll be dealing with in our next episode. All of this is about the British government are saying your criminals and the Irish are saying, no, we're a political organisation. Or the IRA are. And so murder to them is justified because it's political cause.

Whereas to the British, they're seeing it as, yeah, serial killing as crime as disturbances. this is the crux of the issue which we'll get into in the hunger strikes but I suppose can you be a political serial killer well like being a political comedian

like Nish Kumar yes the um so you sort of like the shepherd bush butcher niche Kumar um

but is it sort of doing like ryeasides about Kirstama while also killing you kill someone yeah that's actually a statement on the Kirstama's I guess that's a

political serial killer So just I just do this after the budget just to make you think, Rachel. That's what Rachel's doing to the country. Anyway, let's get to Lord Mountbatten because this is really, so this is their peak.

This is one of the most stunning, not Lord Mount Batty boy, Charlie. Batty boy. I don't know if he ever said Batty boy once in his life. Lord Mountbatten never said Batty boy. I can say that with complete certainty. Yeah.

It just makes you think, doesn't it? He could be a batty boy. they often are. Who's they? You know what I mean, these fruity lords. Gay Lord Mount Batty boy. He was sort of the last

symbolic figure of the Britain's colonial past. So Lord Mountbatten is a retired Royal Navy officer. He had commandeered, he was in charge of Navy operations during World War II. He'd done quite a lot

around Italy, I think. He'd also been instrumental in D-Day. He's a war hero. He's the cut. The British establishment you can get. Yeah, that's pretty big. Pretty big. Uncle to Prince Philip.

I think he's Prince Philip's uncle, but then he's Queen Elizabeth II's cousin. Because they're like cousins. He's Queen Victoria's great-grandson. Hang on. Yeah, they're cousins, right? Elizabeth and Philip are cousins, right? That's crazy that they're cousins.

Philip and Elizabeth were distant cousins. How distant. We're all distant cousins, really? aren't we? I mean, you don't like to think about it on your wedding day, but... Yeah, come on. Second cousins.

So what's a fucky cousin then? I think that's a... They're in the grey area here. First cousin, uh, found upon. Yeah. Not illegal though. Unwise, but not illegal. Um, uh, cousin once removed.

What have they been talking about in the House of Parliament about cousin marriage or something? I think it is illegal. In Bradford, they're trying to ban it because in Bradford there's a lot of, um... Muslims. Whackams get involved. Cousins marry.

One of the tragedy of Wackham living in Greenlands is he's not got a cousin. Someone send Wassam a cousin. If you're Wassam's cousin I don't know It's cold up there

He needs a cousin to cuddle at night. Where do you live? Fucking Tierra del Fuego. Anyway, get up to Greenland, would you? So, Lord Mountbatten, Lord Louis Mountbatten, a huge figurehead

for the British establishment. Queen Elizabeth II's cousin He had a holiday home I think in Sligo maybe. Ireland, in Ireland, the Republic of Ireland. And he, there was a big lake,

and he loved to take his boat out there with his kids and his family. And he'd holiday there every year. And they had thought, the IRA had thought about killing Mountbatten since 1970. There'd been many abandoned plans. There was a failed sniper plan.

Why him above other people in the establishment? Is he specifically done anything that's like... It's more that he is a figurehead of the establishment and he regularly holidays on Ireland. but also he is he's very high up in the military he's the queen's cousin he's like I think he was

now King Charles is sort of godfather or mentor and Mountbatten had frequently dismissed IRA threats saying what would they want with an old band like me Was he the one who was thinking about doing a coup against Against the label of the 70s?

No Yeah maybe it is Or it was against Wilson Calahann General, oh fuck, that's someone else. I think Mountbatten got involved a bit. I think he did get involved. He didn't think he did get involved.

Yeah. So Mountbatten had a summer holiday at Classy Born Castle. 30 years he'd been going there. Yep. And so the IRA had been planning this attack for months, right? And it is a pretty spectacular assassination. Yeah. Assassinations go.

He gets frayedowed. Thomas von Mild, an IRA volunteer, plants a bomb on Mountbatten's boat the night before assassination. it's considered a soft target which I guess it means it's quite easy and it's a radio control detonator and then they go out let's see Mountbatten and with his

grandkids maybe grandkids and kids family 15 year old right yeah there's like an Irish an Irish like boat boy as well and the whole bloat just gets blown to shit and how many die four? There's like eight people on that the boat.

Four. Four die, including Mountbatten. Yeah, a 14 year old, 15 year old and an 83 year old. Blowing an 83 year old

like that. God. What? Satisfying. The thing is, yeah, I mean, you know how people...

Yeah, that would be satisfying though. Bang. Yeah, I'm, suppose an 83-year-old woman,

I'd like to blow up a 90-year-old woman who's sitting in a chair. Okay. I think it'd be very satisfying. Okay, right,

right, right. you know you get to an age where you just sit in your chair. Well, the same reason that it's satisfying blowing off an 80-year-old woman on a boat? Yeah. Wow. Yeah, just, yeah.

I mean, they'd stand up for the last time. But they also killed two teenagers, which is a bit. It's a bit, it's a bit, icky. Come on. And on the same day, there is the Warren Point ambush, which is where the IRA attack a British Army convoy near the border and county down, and they kill six of the Paris,

which is the most amount of... 18 soldiers are killed, 16 from the Paris. That's the Paris largest single, instant loss of life in World War II. Yeah. So we need to wrap up, but basically... But there was six, but there was more,

because they had the second bomb. Oh, right. It was crazy. The second bomb device at the gatehouse in milk churns, it's Ireland. Dead net at 512 p.m. killing 12 more.

So total 18 soldiers were killed. But yes, they hid bombs in milk churns, which, to be fair, is the most IRA thing I've ever heard. Yep. So the point you're trying to get to is that by the end of the 70s, the troubles has come to Britain.

It can no longer be said that it's just a sort of civil war on the streets of Belfast. Yeah. It has got very political. It's very real for the British. Mountbatten and an old woman have been blown to Shindle Lake. Mountbatten's body's been blown. Mountbatten's body has been blown to shit. The assassination is condemned internationally.

The Pope gets involved. Yeah. I mean, that must hurt for the IRA, right? Does that, how much sway? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, because Mountbatten had been the last viceroy of India. There's a week of mourning in India and Burma.

the British tabloid include headlines with these evil bastards may the bastards rot in hell this is sort of the golden age of these headlines because it's around the Falklands as well they're really just letting it all hang out

and Thatcher who is in power by this point she thinks that friend of the pod Muammar Gaddafi has got something to do with it which he probably does knowing his fingers in every pie he funded the IRA at points of course yeah he was well he was a philanthropist

in a way anyway it should be said that in 2021 Sinn Féin apologised for the assassination but Thatcher is in power

and she's fucking livid with the IRA She's a tough old bird As we know from our series She does And she loves a fight She loves a fight And she will win every fight

She enters She's a fucking racehorse She's a ball She's the She's the Protestant No she's the British Arlene Foster Yes

If you're getting anyone If there's anyone of the straights that can take on the lesbian prop forward that is Arlene Foster is Margaret Thatcher. She takes her clothes off. She's a tank. Yeah. Thatcher's an anti-tank gun. Anyway, in our next episode, we will be joined by our correspondent for the troubles Victoria Angeloni to talk about Bobby Sands, the hunger strikes, and, you know, it's going to get dirty.

Yeah. The irony, you think they've sunk low. Yeah. Well, it turns out they stop wiping their bottom. Yeah. to say the least. It's going to get smelly. It's going to get smelly.

It's going to be Charlie's rugby initiation as a political protest. Yeah. Yeah, it's like Charlie, do you ever make your shit's political? Well, just hang on a second. That episode's already on the Patreon where for three pounds a month

you get early access to series. It's a marketplace for all sorts of memorabilia. Ideas, you name it. Fedoras. Yeah. And we'll be doing a bonus episode. This week, it's about, the worst guy who ever live,

Albert Fish. I cannot wait for this one. The wood go. The wood go. The worst guy of all time. If you've got a strong stomach, then you will enjoy Albert Fish. We've covered a lot of fruity characters,

but he may be the fruitiest we cover. He is a piece of fruit. Yeah. Albert Fish is a piece of fruit. Join the Patreon for that. I'm pretty sure none of it will be able to be clipped up. Anyway, Vittoria will be in the next episode. We'll see you then for that.

our epic tapass meal that is the troubles. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye for now. Goodbye for now. This spring performance auto group invites drivers to upgrade with confidence. From March 26 to 28th, the spring upgrade sales event offers a thousand dollar upgrade credit toward any new or pre-owned vehicle. Plus trade evaluations across their network deliver maximum market value for your vehicle. With competitive manufacturer rates and programs available,

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